1
00:00:22,736 --> 00:00:24,362
I don't need it. I'm telling you.

2
00:00:24,446 --> 00:00:28,033
Just because you don't feel sick now
doesn't mean you don't need the shot.

3
00:00:28,116 --> 00:00:30,994
I never get sick, okay?
You can take that and give it to Barry.

4
00:00:31,077 --> 00:00:34,831
-His nose is always running.
-What are you giving me shit for?

5
00:00:34,914 --> 00:00:38,793
I saw you earlier today. We said hi.
I said, "Cole." You said, "Mr. Daisy."

6
00:00:38,877 --> 00:00:42,047
Why are you giving me shit today?
I mean, it's just a needle, man.

7
00:00:44,174 --> 00:00:47,177
Damn. Come here, get the shot.
Ain't nothing to be scared of.

8
00:00:47,844 --> 00:00:50,764
There's 62 kids came here,
got a shot, no problem.

9
00:00:50,847 --> 00:00:54,184
You come in here, take ten minutes?
I got 84 kids more to go. Okay?

10
00:00:54,267 --> 00:00:57,228
We're boys. Be cool. Shit, man.
Are you gonna take this shot?

11
00:00:57,312 --> 00:01:00,315
Step over here and take the shot,
just like you'd take some ass.

12
00:01:00,398 --> 00:01:02,609
There's nothing to be scared of.

13
00:01:03,359 --> 00:01:04,360
I'm not scared.

14
00:01:06,905 --> 00:01:08,615
[Cole screaming]

15
00:01:16,289 --> 00:01:17,874
Pussy!

16
00:01:22,629 --> 00:01:24,464
[school bell rings]

17
00:01:27,300 --> 00:01:29,844
[Melanie] Did you know only one baby
was born on the <i>Mayflower?</i>

18
00:01:30,637 --> 00:01:32,055
How crazy is that shit?

19
00:01:32,764 --> 00:01:34,724
His name was literally Oceanus.

20
00:01:34,808 --> 00:01:36,518
He didn't even have a nationality.

21
00:01:37,018 --> 00:01:38,978
Just a citizen of the sea, I guess.

22
00:01:39,771 --> 00:01:41,439
What class did you learn that in?

23
00:01:41,856 --> 00:01:45,193
[scoffs] No one learns anything in class.
That's why we have the Internet.

24
00:01:46,611 --> 00:01:49,239
[rap music playing over speakers]

25
00:01:49,989 --> 00:01:51,699
[Melanie sighs] There's my dad.

26
00:01:51,783 --> 00:01:53,618
[Melanie's dad] Melanie, get over here.

27
00:01:53,701 --> 00:01:55,537
It was his high-school dream car.

28
00:01:56,746 --> 00:01:59,541
He got it after the divorce
to make Mom jealous, but...

29
00:01:59,833 --> 00:02:02,210
-it didn't work because it's a car.
-[Melanie's dad] Now.

30
00:02:03,878 --> 00:02:06,214
Dad, can we give Cole a ride home?

31
00:02:07,006 --> 00:02:09,759
Cole, are your parents expecting you
to take the bus home?

32
00:02:11,136 --> 00:02:12,554
-I guess so.
-Yeah, they are.

33
00:02:12,637 --> 00:02:14,556
So, you should take the bus, okay, sport?

34
00:02:14,931 --> 00:02:17,183
Sorry, dude.
I'll see you, though, neighbor, huh?

35
00:02:17,725 --> 00:02:18,893
-I didn't--
-What's that?

36
00:02:18,977 --> 00:02:19,978
[engine revving]

37
00:02:21,312 --> 00:02:23,773
-NASCAR Nation, bitch. Whoo!
-[Melanie] Dad--

38
00:02:27,277 --> 00:02:28,278
[Melanie] Dad!

39
00:02:43,668 --> 00:02:46,504
[Jeremy]
Ooh-whah, ooh-whah. Ooh-whah, ooh-whah.

40
00:02:46,588 --> 00:02:47,881
Well, well, well.

41
00:02:48,840 --> 00:02:51,134
[Jeremy] Hey, Colonoscopy.
How's it hanging?

42
00:02:52,260 --> 00:02:53,761
I don't know. Okay?

43
00:02:53,845 --> 00:02:56,306
Well, speaking of hanging,
have your balls dropped yet?

44
00:02:56,389 --> 00:02:59,934
-[boys laughing]
-[Cole mumbling]

45
00:03:01,186 --> 00:03:02,061
I didn't catch that.

46
00:03:02,770 --> 00:03:05,690
I said,
"Why are you so interested in my balls?"

47
00:03:05,773 --> 00:03:07,650
Last thing he cares about is your balls.

48
00:03:07,734 --> 00:03:10,486
[Jeremy] Yeah, 'cause on Saturday,
I hooked up with Shelly MacEntyre.

49
00:03:10,570 --> 00:03:11,404
The sophomore?

50
00:03:11,905 --> 00:03:15,116
The sophomore.
But in many ways, she was a senior.

51
00:03:15,742 --> 00:03:18,203
-I don't believe you.
-You don't need to believe him.

52
00:03:18,286 --> 00:03:20,914
It's not like your belief will validate
what happens to his dick.

53
00:03:20,997 --> 00:03:22,040
Wanna know how it was?

54
00:03:24,334 --> 00:03:25,501
No, not really.

55
00:03:25,585 --> 00:03:28,004
Well, see,
as a 14-year-old in that kind of situation

56
00:03:28,087 --> 00:03:30,506
with a 16-year-old
that looks like Shelly MacEntyre,

57
00:03:30,757 --> 00:03:32,133
it was overwhelming, man.

58
00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:34,302
I mean, she is a woman.

59
00:03:35,261 --> 00:03:37,972
Fully-developed, man.
It's crazy, man. It's... [grunts]

60
00:03:38,056 --> 00:03:39,599
Man, you know what I'm saying?

61
00:03:41,476 --> 00:03:43,394
I said, do you know what I'm saying?

62
00:03:44,103 --> 00:03:46,731
You just said it didn't matter
if I believed you.

63
00:03:46,814 --> 00:03:49,943
-Well, I changed my mind, bitch.
-Sorry, I wasn't--

64
00:03:52,528 --> 00:03:54,864
[Jeremy] Oh, my God. He's so weird.
[laughs]

65
00:03:55,490 --> 00:03:58,451
Ooh-whah, ooh-whah. Ooh-whah, ooh-whah.

66
00:03:58,534 --> 00:03:59,369
[woman] Hey!

67
00:04:06,542 --> 00:04:07,752
Did you just touch Cole?

68
00:04:08,294 --> 00:04:10,546
-So, what if I did?
-[woman] Jeremy, check it out.

69
00:04:11,047 --> 00:04:13,633
You so much as think about Cole again...

70
00:04:15,927 --> 00:04:17,053
and I'm gonna...

71
00:04:17,136 --> 00:04:18,304
[inaudible dialogue]

72
00:04:18,388 --> 00:04:21,808
<i>♪ The girls wanna be her</i>
<i>The boys wanna be her ♪</i>

73
00:04:22,350 --> 00:04:23,268
You crazy bitch.

74
00:04:25,270 --> 00:04:27,230
<i>♪ The girls wanna be her ♪</i>

75
00:04:27,313 --> 00:04:29,190
-[tire hissing]
-Now get out of here!

76
00:04:30,191 --> 00:04:32,193
Before I run you over,
you little Pap smear.

77
00:04:34,904 --> 00:04:36,489
-Hey, Coley.
-[Cole] Hey, Bee.

78
00:04:39,075 --> 00:04:39,909
These are new.

79
00:04:40,618 --> 00:04:42,829
Yeah, I have to wear them sometimes.

80
00:04:42,912 --> 00:04:45,331
They supposedly help strengthen
my left eye,

81
00:04:45,415 --> 00:04:48,626
-but I can't tell the difference.
-You look pretty strong to me.

82
00:04:49,877 --> 00:04:50,795
You skin your palms?

83
00:04:51,629 --> 00:04:53,923
-It doesn't hurt.
-Yeah, it does. Come here.

84
00:05:02,015 --> 00:05:04,517
-They bother you a lot?
-No.

85
00:05:06,269 --> 00:05:09,480
You look away when you lie, dude.
They the ones that egg your house?

86
00:05:11,983 --> 00:05:15,403
[sighs, clicks tongue]
You gotta punch them in the dick.

87
00:05:15,945 --> 00:05:18,781
And if they're chasing you,
wait until they've almost got you,

88
00:05:18,865 --> 00:05:21,451
drop like a bag of rocks,
then when they trip over you,

89
00:05:21,534 --> 00:05:23,995
and they're on the ground,
kick them in the dick.

90
00:05:27,248 --> 00:05:30,209
-Hey, so, tell me, how's the folks?
-Better, I think.

91
00:05:30,710 --> 00:05:32,170
Hotel therapy's working?

92
00:05:32,462 --> 00:05:34,047
[chuckles] No, come on, it's great.

93
00:05:34,130 --> 00:05:38,051
I mean, they're happy,
we get to hang out, and I get paid.

94
00:05:38,551 --> 00:05:41,346
-I'm like your little Protestant.
-[chuckles] What?

95
00:05:41,429 --> 00:05:43,806
'Cause, like, I have to pay you
to hang out with me.

96
00:05:44,307 --> 00:05:46,100
Are you trying to say "prostitute"?

97
00:05:46,601 --> 00:05:47,518
Oh, my God--

98
00:05:47,602 --> 00:05:50,813
No, that would make <i>me </i>the prostitute
and your parents the clients.

99
00:05:50,897 --> 00:05:53,274
That is a terrible analogy.
That is the worst one ever.

100
00:05:54,359 --> 00:05:55,610
-Oh...
-Besides,

101
00:05:55,693 --> 00:05:57,612
I'd wanna hang out with you either way.

102
00:05:58,363 --> 00:05:59,197
Really?

103
00:05:59,322 --> 00:06:00,990
One hundred percent.

104
00:06:01,532 --> 00:06:05,578
I got two years tops before you're
too cool to hang out with me.

105
00:06:05,953 --> 00:06:07,538
I'll never be too cool.

106
00:06:11,459 --> 00:06:13,711
[Bee]
Hey, is that the roof of your tree house?

107
00:06:13,795 --> 00:06:15,713
[Cole]
Yeah, we just started to take it down.

108
00:06:16,214 --> 00:06:18,716
I-- I don't care. I mean, my, uh--

109
00:06:18,800 --> 00:06:20,593
Tree houses are for kids anyway.

110
00:06:21,594 --> 00:06:23,763
There's a lot of good memories
in there, right?

111
00:06:25,390 --> 00:06:26,224
Yeah.

112
00:06:26,557 --> 00:06:29,977
All right, tomorrow night. You. Me. Party.

113
00:06:30,812 --> 00:06:31,646
Sounds good.

114
00:06:33,189 --> 00:06:34,065
[gulps]

115
00:06:34,816 --> 00:06:35,650
[Bee grunts]

116
00:06:40,196 --> 00:06:41,948
[gulps]

117
00:06:42,031 --> 00:06:43,116
E.T. fingers.

118
00:06:43,908 --> 00:06:45,868
[both buzzing]

119
00:06:46,369 --> 00:06:48,413
-All right. See you, Cee.
-Bye-bye, Bee.

120
00:06:49,789 --> 00:06:50,998
[car door squeaks]

121
00:06:51,207 --> 00:06:54,627
Gotta get that door fixed.
You're still giving this to me, right?

122
00:06:54,710 --> 00:06:57,630
-One hundred percent.
-Can't have a sticky door on my car.

123
00:07:23,614 --> 00:07:24,490
Hey, Mom!

124
00:07:24,657 --> 00:07:26,367
[Mom] Hey! Cole.

125
00:07:27,618 --> 00:07:30,413
Cole, can you hand me one
of those traps, please?

126
00:07:31,122 --> 00:07:32,081
Ow.

127
00:07:32,957 --> 00:07:34,292
-Thanks. Hi.
-Hi.

128
00:07:34,876 --> 00:07:36,002
[grunts] Thanks, buddy.

129
00:07:37,753 --> 00:07:39,964
[groans] God. God.

130
00:07:40,047 --> 00:07:42,592
Mom, how can you be under there?
There's like a trillion spiders.

131
00:07:42,675 --> 00:07:46,471
[Mom] Cole, I don't like it under here.
It's pretty much the worst.

132
00:07:47,305 --> 00:07:49,599
-Do you think I'm a pussy, Mom?
-[thud] Ow.

133
00:07:50,141 --> 00:07:51,684
[Mom] Do you know what that word means?

134
00:07:51,767 --> 00:07:53,603
-[Cole] Yeah, like, afraid of everything.
-Ow.

135
00:07:54,854 --> 00:07:56,022
Um...

136
00:07:56,564 --> 00:07:57,482
Huh.

137
00:07:58,191 --> 00:07:59,442
Well... [sighs]

138
00:08:00,776 --> 00:08:05,531
I think... you are at a time in your life

139
00:08:05,698 --> 00:08:08,451
where a lot of things are scary.

140
00:08:08,951 --> 00:08:13,748
But as you get older, those same things
will stop frightening you as much.

141
00:08:14,332 --> 00:08:15,166
Okay?

142
00:08:17,752 --> 00:08:18,836
It's gonna be okay.

143
00:08:19,420 --> 00:08:23,174
[Cole] You should really get some
bug spray to kill the spiders in there.

144
00:08:23,257 --> 00:08:26,511
What have they done to you?
They eat other dirty bugs.

145
00:08:26,594 --> 00:08:28,262
Hey, will you get me a lemonade?

146
00:08:28,513 --> 00:08:29,347
-Yep.
-Thanks.

147
00:08:31,682 --> 00:08:34,602
Mom, I know "pussy" also means "vagina."
I'm not retarded.

148
00:08:36,896 --> 00:08:40,441
Cole Johnson. Do not say "retarded."

149
00:08:40,983 --> 00:08:43,027
-But I can say "pussy" or "vagi--"
-[drill whirring]

150
00:08:43,110 --> 00:08:44,237
Don't say it, okay?

151
00:08:44,779 --> 00:08:45,821
Go get me a lemonade.

152
00:08:50,284 --> 00:08:51,661
Oh, my God, he said "pussy."

153
00:08:52,620 --> 00:08:54,247
[man] Breathe in. Breathe out.

154
00:08:54,580 --> 00:08:56,832
-Unclench that sphincter.
-[Cole] Okay.

155
00:08:56,916 --> 00:08:59,418
-How those mirrors looking?
-Looking good.

156
00:08:59,502 --> 00:09:00,378
Parking brakes?

157
00:09:01,337 --> 00:09:02,171
Nope.

158
00:09:02,255 --> 00:09:04,298
-Hands?
-Ten and two.

159
00:09:05,007 --> 00:09:05,883
Engage.

160
00:09:05,967 --> 00:09:07,969
[engine revs, fades]

161
00:09:11,931 --> 00:09:15,309
Dad, did you know that seven teenagers
die a day from driving?

162
00:09:15,685 --> 00:09:17,144
Really? Wow.

163
00:09:17,478 --> 00:09:21,857
Did you know that, uh, 14 teenagers
die a day from over-worrying?

164
00:09:22,525 --> 00:09:23,568
I went on the Internet,

165
00:09:23,651 --> 00:09:26,112
and there's pictures of them.
They die like this:

166
00:09:30,116 --> 00:09:31,284
Maybe next week.

167
00:09:32,243 --> 00:09:34,120
All right, buddy, sure. You wanna swap?

168
00:09:34,662 --> 00:09:36,455
-Yeah.
-Good. All right. You did good.

169
00:09:37,248 --> 00:09:39,709
You started the car,
you put the seat belt on.

170
00:09:39,792 --> 00:09:42,128
Don't worry about it, pal.
There's no rush.

171
00:09:42,211 --> 00:09:44,922
It's okay to be scared.
It's not a big deal, okay?

172
00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:49,677
Hey, let me ask you something.
Do your friends--

173
00:09:49,885 --> 00:09:52,054
Do they make fun of you
for having a babysitter?

174
00:09:52,597 --> 00:09:53,431
Yeah.

175
00:09:53,889 --> 00:09:56,017
But then they see her
and get really jealous.

176
00:09:56,934 --> 00:09:58,811
Yeah. Heck, yeah, they do. [chuckles]

177
00:09:58,894 --> 00:10:01,856
I don't know about you, buddy,
but I'm feeling like a cop.

178
00:10:02,398 --> 00:10:04,150
I'm craving some donuts.

179
00:10:04,233 --> 00:10:05,735
[shouting]

180
00:10:08,070 --> 00:10:08,946
[Dad] All right!

181
00:10:10,239 --> 00:10:12,658
[both laughing]

182
00:10:18,414 --> 00:10:19,457
What are you watching?

183
00:10:19,540 --> 00:10:21,834
Your dad is bingeing on <i>Mad Men.</i>

184
00:10:21,917 --> 00:10:22,877
Again.

185
00:10:23,377 --> 00:10:24,378
You wouldn't like it.

186
00:10:25,046 --> 00:10:26,130
It's on HBO?

187
00:10:26,213 --> 00:10:28,799
-[chuckles]
-No, it's not-- It's not dirty, buddy.

188
00:10:28,883 --> 00:10:29,759
It's not on HBO.

189
00:10:29,842 --> 00:10:32,261
It's dense, you know.
So, it might go over your head.

190
00:10:32,386 --> 00:10:35,097
When you get a little older,
we'll binge-watch it together.

191
00:10:35,181 --> 00:10:36,057
How about that?

192
00:10:36,140 --> 00:10:38,976
-[Cole] All right.
-Cole, will you clean up the toys

193
00:10:39,060 --> 00:10:40,144
in the hallway for me?

194
00:10:40,227 --> 00:10:41,562
Okay, Mom. Jeez.

195
00:10:41,646 --> 00:10:42,480
Thank you.

196
00:10:48,611 --> 00:10:49,612
[Cole] Much cleaner.

197
00:11:14,220 --> 00:11:15,346
Who cares?

198
00:11:16,681 --> 00:11:17,515
Hey. Oh.

199
00:11:17,848 --> 00:11:19,767
Hey, that doesn't seem safe at all.

200
00:11:19,892 --> 00:11:21,644
-I can handle it.
-Yeah. No, I get it.

201
00:11:21,727 --> 00:11:22,645
Stop. Stop.

202
00:11:22,895 --> 00:11:24,271
And hand me the knife.

203
00:11:25,356 --> 00:11:28,025
Fabulous.
Why you cutting up your car with a knife?

204
00:11:28,818 --> 00:11:30,736
I'm gonna switch the roof
with a fastback,

205
00:11:30,820 --> 00:11:32,029
-so it's aerodynamic.
-Uh-huh.

206
00:11:32,113 --> 00:11:34,281
It's gonna give me more downforce
on the turns.

207
00:11:34,365 --> 00:11:36,367
When it hits the ramp,
it'll do a barrel roll

208
00:11:36,450 --> 00:11:38,828
and smash into the crash zone
exactly how I intend--

209
00:11:38,911 --> 00:11:41,622
Got it, got it.
I applaud your passion for aerodynamics.

210
00:11:41,706 --> 00:11:44,834
I absolutely do, but only use this
if you're cutting a flank steak.

211
00:11:44,917 --> 00:11:46,460
And don't do that. That's my job.

212
00:11:46,544 --> 00:11:49,296
And if you take that job,
what am I doing at this house?

213
00:11:49,797 --> 00:11:51,257
Do you want me to put it back?

214
00:11:51,340 --> 00:11:52,967
[Dad] No. I'm gonna put this
in the dishwasher,

215
00:11:53,050 --> 00:11:55,177
'cause it's coated in my sweat and fear.

216
00:11:57,179 --> 00:12:00,349
My parents are going away again.
I think they go to have sex,

217
00:12:00,433 --> 00:12:03,352
but it just makes me feel like they go
to get away from me.

218
00:12:04,311 --> 00:12:05,980
They're definitely having sex.

219
00:12:06,063 --> 00:12:07,940
They probably have sex
when you're home, too.

220
00:12:08,441 --> 00:12:12,069
Besides, I bet Bee has boys over
at your place all the time doing it.

221
00:12:12,153 --> 00:12:13,195
Nope. No.

222
00:12:13,279 --> 00:12:14,572
No way. Not a chance.

223
00:12:14,947 --> 00:12:17,408
Yeah. That's what babysitters do.

224
00:12:18,409 --> 00:12:21,662
They put the kids down,
sneak their boyfriends in. Doing it.

225
00:12:22,621 --> 00:12:25,750
Seriously, have you ever been awake
after she's fallen asleep?

226
00:12:26,542 --> 00:12:28,961
I dare you to stay up tonight. You'll see.

227
00:12:29,920 --> 00:12:31,172
I'm gonna find out.

228
00:12:31,839 --> 00:12:34,008
-Perv.
-No! I'm choking!

229
00:12:34,133 --> 00:12:35,634
-[Melanie laughing]
-[Cole shouting]

230
00:13:15,257 --> 00:13:17,301
[boy] Pussy!

231
00:13:17,384 --> 00:13:18,511
[school bell rings]

232
00:13:19,762 --> 00:13:23,474
Honey, not that I'm rushing you,
but weren't we supposed to leave at five?

233
00:13:23,557 --> 00:13:25,601
[Mom] No, honey,
5:30 to avoid holiday traffic.

234
00:13:25,684 --> 00:13:27,186
We were supposed to leave at five.

235
00:13:27,269 --> 00:13:29,855
Don't move the furniture around.
We just did the floors.

236
00:13:29,939 --> 00:13:31,857
-I don't want your mom yelling.
-[Cole] Got it.

237
00:13:31,941 --> 00:13:34,527
I don't yell at you.
I just speak in all caps.

238
00:13:34,610 --> 00:13:36,320
Right. That's what I love about her.

239
00:13:36,403 --> 00:13:38,614
-[doorbell rings]
-Here. Get that. It's probably Bee.

240
00:13:38,697 --> 00:13:39,615
[Cole] Okay.

241
00:13:40,074 --> 00:13:41,992
-[Mom] Can you hurry up?
-[Dad] Yes.

242
00:13:44,245 --> 00:13:45,246
[exhales deeply]

243
00:13:48,249 --> 00:13:50,668
-What up, Cee?
-What up, Bee?

244
00:13:50,751 --> 00:13:51,752
[both buzzing]

245
00:13:51,836 --> 00:13:54,755
-[Mom] Hey, Bee. How are you?
-Oh, you know, can't complain.

246
00:13:54,839 --> 00:13:56,507
-[Mom] Good.
-Where to this weekend?

247
00:13:56,590 --> 00:13:58,884
-Uh... The Hyatt. Living large.
-Mm!

248
00:13:58,968 --> 00:13:59,802
[Dad] Can't find it!

249
00:13:59,885 --> 00:14:02,847
Uh, try the bottom drawer
under your Invisalign.

250
00:14:03,556 --> 00:14:05,266
Um, anyway, you know the drill.

251
00:14:05,349 --> 00:14:08,143
No violent movies,
no junk food, bed by ten.

252
00:14:08,227 --> 00:14:09,937
-[Cole] Mom.
-Bed by 10:30?

253
00:14:10,020 --> 00:14:11,564
-[Cole] You serious?
-[Bee] Anything else?

254
00:14:11,647 --> 00:14:13,774
Uh, there is not a bathing suit
in that bedroom.

255
00:14:13,858 --> 00:14:16,193
[Mom] Then, honey,
I don't know what to tell you.

256
00:14:16,277 --> 00:14:17,486
-I'm not up there.
-[Dad] Okay.

257
00:14:17,570 --> 00:14:18,863
[sighs]

258
00:14:18,946 --> 00:14:22,116
-He's totally gonna bring his jean shorts.
-[Cole] Mom, he calls them jorts.

259
00:14:22,199 --> 00:14:25,536
-Well, we'll be fine. I can handle him.
-I know. You're the best.

260
00:14:25,744 --> 00:14:28,205
-[Dad] I'm bringing my jorts.
-[Mom] I knew it!

261
00:14:28,289 --> 00:14:30,958
-[Dad] I'm bringing my jorts.
-I knew it. Great.

262
00:14:31,375 --> 00:14:33,419
I will be the envy of women everywhere.

263
00:14:33,502 --> 00:14:35,963
Hey, uh, Bee,
call us if there's any trouble, okay?

264
00:14:36,046 --> 00:14:38,090
-Cole, don't cause any trouble.
-[Cole] Dad, I know.

265
00:14:38,173 --> 00:14:39,550
You know what, honey?

266
00:14:40,384 --> 00:14:42,469
-You got your flu shot, so no exertion.
-[Cole] Mom.

267
00:14:42,553 --> 00:14:45,014
-Yeah, no running around. Board games.
-[Cole] Got it. Okay?

268
00:14:47,099 --> 00:14:50,269
Hey, Cole, remember,
you're the man of the house now.

269
00:14:50,644 --> 00:14:51,854
That's sweet. You are.

270
00:14:51,937 --> 00:14:54,023
-We love you. Bye, Bee.
-I love you. Have fun.

271
00:14:54,148 --> 00:14:56,275
-[Dad] But not too much fun.
-[Mom] Not too much.

272
00:14:56,358 --> 00:14:58,569
[Foghat's
"I Just Want to Make Love to You" playing]

273
00:15:06,452 --> 00:15:09,246
<i>♪ I don't want you cook my bread ♪</i>

274
00:15:09,914 --> 00:15:13,167
♪<i> I don't want you make my bed </i>♪

275
00:15:13,834 --> 00:15:17,087
<i>♪ I don't want you to be true ♪</i>

276
00:15:17,630 --> 00:15:21,216
<i>♪ I just want to make love to you ♪</i>

277
00:15:29,308 --> 00:15:32,186
♪ <i>I don't want you be no slave ♪</i>

278
00:15:32,811 --> 00:15:36,065
♪<i> I don't want you to be sad and blue </i>♪

279
00:15:36,857 --> 00:15:39,902
♪ <i>I just want to make love to you ♪</i>

280
00:15:42,446 --> 00:15:44,031
[Cole] No way you're gonna beat my dive.

281
00:15:48,202 --> 00:15:52,414
So, you're basically saying,
intergalactic dream team on a mission.

282
00:15:52,498 --> 00:15:56,043
-Yeah. So, there's an epic villain, right?
-Right.

283
00:15:56,126 --> 00:15:58,170
Okay, so, you have to fill a starship...

284
00:15:58,837 --> 00:16:03,300
full of the best people or aliens
or robots to take them down.

285
00:16:03,384 --> 00:16:05,094
-How many seats have I got?
-Five.

286
00:16:05,177 --> 00:16:07,471
-Five?
-Six, if you need, like, a duo.

287
00:16:07,554 --> 00:16:09,515
But you can't have a Predator
and Xenomorph.

288
00:16:09,598 --> 00:16:11,392
They'd fight. The mission would be futile.

289
00:16:11,475 --> 00:16:12,810
No, no, okay, I get it.

290
00:16:13,686 --> 00:16:16,105
All right. One... Kirk.

291
00:16:16,230 --> 00:16:17,231
Two, Picard.

292
00:16:17,314 --> 00:16:20,693
Three, Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum
from <i>Independence Day.</i>

293
00:16:20,776 --> 00:16:24,947
Five, Ripley, and six...
Are you ready for this shit?

294
00:16:25,030 --> 00:16:26,865
A Xenomorph egg.

295
00:16:27,408 --> 00:16:28,242
-No way.
-Yeah.

296
00:16:29,576 --> 00:16:31,787
Yes. Yes. Okay. Here's the plan.

297
00:16:31,870 --> 00:16:34,707
Kirk and Picard team up to captain,
then when they get close,

298
00:16:34,790 --> 00:16:37,126
they send Will and Goldblum
to get inside the lair.

299
00:16:37,209 --> 00:16:39,128
-They have experience with that.
-Fair.

300
00:16:39,211 --> 00:16:41,672
Now, this whole time,
Ripley's been bitching

301
00:16:41,755 --> 00:16:44,800
about the Xenomorph egg and shit,
'cause that's her move.

302
00:16:45,009 --> 00:16:46,135
But she's gotta do this.

303
00:16:46,218 --> 00:16:48,595
-It's the only way to save the world.
-The universe.

304
00:16:48,679 --> 00:16:49,555
Right! Exactly!

305
00:16:49,638 --> 00:16:52,599
So,
Will and Goldblum get her inside the lair.

306
00:16:52,683 --> 00:16:57,021
Ripley personally drops off the egg,
the facehugger attacks the big bad!

307
00:16:57,271 --> 00:17:00,399
Ripley makes it back to Will and Goldblum,
the big bad attacks them,

308
00:17:00,482 --> 00:17:01,984
they narrowly escape.

309
00:17:02,067 --> 00:17:05,112
Kirk and Picard supply cover
as the spacecraft returns home,

310
00:17:05,612 --> 00:17:09,450
then they peace out of there. Meanwhile,
the big bad starts feeling like shit...

311
00:17:09,533 --> 00:17:12,077
-[groaning]
-[both shouting]

312
00:17:14,455 --> 00:17:15,289
He's out!

313
00:17:20,419 --> 00:17:21,503
Who said he was a he?

314
00:17:23,255 --> 00:17:26,383
-Shut up. A woman just saved the galaxy.
-Are facehuggers female?

315
00:17:26,925 --> 00:17:28,177
No, 'cause they got dicks.

316
00:17:28,260 --> 00:17:31,096
Oh, so, you're saying it took a dick
to save the galaxy.

317
00:17:32,806 --> 00:17:34,141
-I want a do-over.
-[grunts]

318
00:17:34,975 --> 00:17:36,894
-I want a do-over.
-No do-overs.

319
00:17:36,977 --> 00:17:40,397
Come on. Aliens don't abide
by our primitive gender stereotypes.

320
00:17:40,481 --> 00:17:42,357
-What's done is done.
-You suck.

321
00:17:42,441 --> 00:17:47,154
-You suck, and I hope you die.
-You couldn't live without me.

322
00:17:47,237 --> 00:17:50,574
It would definitely affect my income.
So, you're probably right.

323
00:17:50,657 --> 00:17:51,492
[timer dings]

324
00:17:51,575 --> 00:17:53,118
-Pizza!
-Pizza!

325
00:17:54,995 --> 00:17:59,833
[Bee and actor 1] Big Indian Chief.
So special. So above the law.

326
00:18:00,751 --> 00:18:03,253
I told you, you'd make a mistake,
and I'd be waiting.

327
00:18:05,422 --> 00:18:09,259
[Cole and actor 2] It doesn't look
like I have any choice, does it?

328
00:18:09,343 --> 00:18:11,887
[Bee and actor 1 laugh]
That's right. You don't.

329
00:18:12,387 --> 00:18:14,640
[Cole and actor 2]
I'm gonna take this right foot...

330
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:19,937
and I'm gonna whop you
on that side of your face.

331
00:18:21,188 --> 00:18:22,606
And you wanna know something?

332
00:18:23,107 --> 00:18:25,776
There's not a damn thing
you're gonna be able to do about it.

333
00:18:26,318 --> 00:18:28,612
-[Bee and actor 1] Really?
-[Cole and actor 2] Really.

334
00:18:32,074 --> 00:18:33,617
[Bee and actor 1]
Kill that Indian son of a bitch.

335
00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:35,202
[grunting and shouting]

336
00:18:39,123 --> 00:18:40,749
[both laughing]

337
00:18:42,751 --> 00:18:44,878
Think my parents are gonna get a divorce?

338
00:18:47,214 --> 00:18:48,757
I don't know, man. I hope not.

339
00:18:49,633 --> 00:18:52,636
Melanie's parents got divorced.
Her mom lives with her boyfriend.

340
00:18:52,719 --> 00:18:53,804
That's gross.

341
00:18:55,305 --> 00:18:57,474
Isn't that the cute chick
across the street?

342
00:18:57,933 --> 00:19:00,435
Ms. Dryer is not cute. She's gross.

343
00:19:00,519 --> 00:19:01,854
Her boyfriend's like 20.

344
00:19:01,937 --> 00:19:04,523
Not her. Melanie.

345
00:19:05,858 --> 00:19:08,235
I wouldn't say she's cute.

346
00:19:08,318 --> 00:19:11,071
Oh, I would.
I would say she's super-duper cute.

347
00:19:11,488 --> 00:19:14,324
[stammers] I see what you're trying to do.
It's not gonna work.

348
00:19:14,408 --> 00:19:16,493
Whatever. You want your tongues to touch.

349
00:19:17,119 --> 00:19:18,078
Nope. No way.

350
00:19:18,162 --> 00:19:21,081
-Oh, you're in denial.
-You're an... asshole.

351
00:19:21,165 --> 00:19:22,791
[laughing]

352
00:19:23,250 --> 00:19:25,002
Oh, my God. That was so great.

353
00:19:26,962 --> 00:19:29,548
But you'll be all right
if your parents break up.

354
00:19:29,631 --> 00:19:32,593
I mean...
you just gotta take care of yourself.

355
00:19:33,135 --> 00:19:36,513
Gotta figure out what you want,
and then do what you can to get it.

356
00:19:39,933 --> 00:19:40,934
[Cole sighs]

357
00:19:43,562 --> 00:19:44,688
[both chuckle]

358
00:19:45,230 --> 00:19:46,565
Ah, shit, dude, it's super late.

359
00:19:47,816 --> 00:19:50,402
-I'm not tired.
-Well, I know <i>you're </i>not. I am.

360
00:19:51,778 --> 00:19:54,448
[snaps fingers]
If I give you a shot, will you go to bed?

361
00:19:55,741 --> 00:19:58,410
-I don't know, maybe.
-I'll make it a double.

362
00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:01,246
-You'll sleep like a rock.
-Okay.

363
00:20:03,707 --> 00:20:05,292
Here you are, my good sir.

364
00:20:06,084 --> 00:20:08,045
Don't say a word of this to your parents.

365
00:20:09,171 --> 00:20:11,506
My dad lets me drink Mike's all the time.

366
00:20:11,590 --> 00:20:13,967
Dude, that is the coolest thing
I've ever heard in my life.

367
00:20:19,932 --> 00:20:21,475
You're not gonna do it with me?

368
00:20:23,143 --> 00:20:25,062
All right, sure. I'll be right back.

369
00:20:46,583 --> 00:20:47,626
[coughing]

370
00:20:47,709 --> 00:20:48,919
You did it without me?

371
00:20:50,837 --> 00:20:52,256
Cheers.

372
00:20:53,298 --> 00:20:54,341
Whew.

373
00:20:56,510 --> 00:20:58,345
-[Melanie on phone] <i>She's getting laid.</i>
-[chuckles]

374
00:20:58,428 --> 00:21:00,722
-I'm gonna find out.
<i>-Wow, I'm impressed.</i>

375
00:21:00,806 --> 00:21:03,350
<i>That's actually pervy, though,</i>
<i>watching people do it.</i>

376
00:21:03,433 --> 00:21:06,645
I'm not a perv. I just wanna know
what happens after I go to sleep.

377
00:21:08,730 --> 00:21:09,606
I gotta go.

378
00:21:10,440 --> 00:21:11,650
[phone beeps]

379
00:21:11,733 --> 00:21:14,069
-No.
-[footsteps approaching]

380
00:21:14,861 --> 00:21:15,862
[knock on door]

381
00:21:16,405 --> 00:21:17,364
Enter.

382
00:21:19,032 --> 00:21:19,866
You sleepy?

383
00:21:20,742 --> 00:21:22,369
Yeah, I'm really tired.

384
00:21:23,328 --> 00:21:25,747
Well, rest up.
The party continues tomorrow.

385
00:21:26,290 --> 00:21:28,917
You need anything? All right.

386
00:21:29,001 --> 00:21:30,544
-Bee?
-Yeah?

387
00:21:34,006 --> 00:21:37,759
Thanks for knowing me
and treating me like I was okay.

388
00:21:40,846 --> 00:21:42,139
You don't think you're okay?

389
00:21:49,062 --> 00:21:49,896
I mean...

390
00:21:52,983 --> 00:21:54,651
I wanna feel normal, but...

391
00:21:58,155 --> 00:22:00,073
I just feel weird most of the time.

392
00:22:03,827 --> 00:22:04,995
Well, I like weird.

393
00:22:06,496 --> 00:22:07,372
All of the time.

394
00:22:09,207 --> 00:22:12,669
So, just imagine how all the girls
are gonna love you when you're a senior.

395
00:22:13,920 --> 00:22:14,755
[sniffles]

396
00:22:16,506 --> 00:22:17,674
See you in the morning.

397
00:22:18,216 --> 00:22:19,259
Good night, dude.

398
00:22:33,690 --> 00:22:35,192
[doorbell rings]

399
00:22:36,068 --> 00:22:37,569
[people chattering nearby]

400
00:22:40,822 --> 00:22:42,366
Ew. Orgy?

401
00:22:44,993 --> 00:22:45,827
Orgy?

402
00:22:51,375 --> 00:22:53,043
[woman moaning on phone]

403
00:23:26,493 --> 00:23:28,495
[indistinct chattering]

404
00:23:28,787 --> 00:23:29,788
[man] Spin it.

405
00:23:52,310 --> 00:23:53,145
[Allison] Whoo!

406
00:23:53,353 --> 00:23:55,522
-[Max] Yeah!
-[John] We lit. We lit.

407
00:23:56,731 --> 00:23:57,566
Truth me.

408
00:23:58,442 --> 00:24:02,529
Out of everybody here,
who would you want to sleep with the most?

409
00:24:04,948 --> 00:24:06,658
-Sonya.
-[Allison] Ooh, yeah.

410
00:24:06,741 --> 00:24:07,784
[laughing]

411
00:24:07,868 --> 00:24:08,952
Hundred percent.

412
00:24:09,453 --> 00:24:12,205
-Come on.
-Sam, you're a close second, stud.

413
00:24:12,289 --> 00:24:13,915
-[John] Damn.
-Okay. My turn.

414
00:24:14,499 --> 00:24:15,500
[Max grunts]

415
00:24:15,959 --> 00:24:18,211
-[Allison] Yo, people.
-[John] To this bad girl.

416
00:24:18,295 --> 00:24:20,088
Bee, truth or dare.

417
00:24:22,048 --> 00:24:23,175
Dare.

418
00:24:23,258 --> 00:24:24,259
[all shout]

419
00:24:24,342 --> 00:24:27,679
-I dare you to kiss everyone here.
-[Allison chuckles]

420
00:24:27,762 --> 00:24:29,973
-Yes.
-[Allison] Ooh, yeah.

421
00:24:30,056 --> 00:24:31,933
-[John] She got balls.
-[Sonya] I need to watch.

422
00:24:32,017 --> 00:24:33,393
[Sonya chuckling]

423
00:24:34,519 --> 00:24:35,520
All right.

424
00:24:35,604 --> 00:24:38,315
-That's what I'm talking about.
-[Sonya] I'm excited for that.

425
00:24:38,398 --> 00:24:40,108
-[Max] That's all I'm looking for.
-[Allison] Hold on.

426
00:24:40,192 --> 00:24:41,026
[John] Let's go.

427
00:24:42,277 --> 00:24:43,111
I'm ready.

428
00:24:43,195 --> 00:24:45,113
♪<i> Everybody loves the sunshine ♪</i>

429
00:24:46,948 --> 00:24:49,910
[in deep voice] I know it was you, Fredo.
I know it was you.

430
00:24:51,036 --> 00:24:51,995
[all laughing]

431
00:24:52,078 --> 00:24:54,039
-Thank you.
-Is that <i>Lord of the Rings?</i>

432
00:24:54,122 --> 00:24:55,916
That was <i>The Godfather Part II.</i>

433
00:24:56,166 --> 00:24:57,250
I love her.

434
00:24:57,334 --> 00:24:58,251
[all laughing]

435
00:24:58,335 --> 00:25:01,046
-[Bee] All right, this is easy. Come on.
-[Max] That was pretty good.

436
00:25:01,129 --> 00:25:03,131
[Bow Wow Wow's "I Want Candy" playing]

437
00:25:06,092 --> 00:25:07,135
[Max] Oh, okay.

438
00:25:08,053 --> 00:25:09,679
[John] Y'all rehearsed this.

439
00:25:14,351 --> 00:25:16,520
<i>♪ Go to see him when the sun goes down ♪</i>

440
00:25:18,522 --> 00:25:20,982
<i>♪ Ain't no finer boy in town ♪</i>

441
00:25:23,026 --> 00:25:25,487
<i>♪ You're my guy</i>
<i>What the doctor ordered ♪</i>

442
00:25:27,447 --> 00:25:29,658
<i>♪ So sweet you make my mouth water ♪</i>

443
00:25:31,701 --> 00:25:33,703
<i>♪ I want candy </i>♪

444
00:25:36,164 --> 00:25:38,250
<i>♪ I want candy </i>♪

445
00:25:40,252 --> 00:25:41,503
<i>♪ Yeah! </i>♪

446
00:25:49,135 --> 00:25:51,638
<i>♪ I want candy </i>♪

447
00:25:53,598 --> 00:25:55,976
<i>♪ I want candy </i>♪

448
00:25:57,894 --> 00:26:00,021
<i>♪ I want candy </i>♪

449
00:26:02,148 --> 00:26:04,276
[pants] Wait, just give me--

450
00:26:05,026 --> 00:26:06,820
Give me a second to process that shit.

451
00:26:06,903 --> 00:26:09,614
-[John] You raised by Rick James?
-I'm thinking a redo.

452
00:26:09,698 --> 00:26:11,157
-That's amazing.
-[laughing]

453
00:26:11,241 --> 00:26:14,536
Make sure it's real nice and long for you,
because I'm black. See that?

454
00:26:14,619 --> 00:26:15,870
There you go. Mm.

455
00:26:17,289 --> 00:26:19,249
-[Bee giggles]
-Fuck, yeah.

456
00:26:19,666 --> 00:26:20,500
Come on.

457
00:26:20,584 --> 00:26:21,960
[Allison laughing]

458
00:26:22,043 --> 00:26:24,212
-Whoo!
-[Sonya] Yeah!

459
00:26:25,672 --> 00:26:26,715
[John] Oh, Bee!

460
00:26:26,798 --> 00:26:28,216
-[all laughing]
-[John groans]

461
00:26:28,300 --> 00:26:29,426
Bee, what the hell?

462
00:26:29,509 --> 00:26:32,387
You give her that romantic shit,
and you're gonna lick my face?

463
00:26:33,471 --> 00:26:34,973
Damn, that's all I'm asking.

464
00:26:35,056 --> 00:26:36,766
-[Bee] All right.
-[John] Freaky shit.

465
00:26:37,976 --> 00:26:40,812
Smell good. The spit is nice.
Brushed your teeth this morning.

466
00:26:42,647 --> 00:26:43,648
[Max laughing] Okay.

467
00:26:47,193 --> 00:26:48,236
-[John] Weird.
-[Bee] Hi.

468
00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:50,780
-[John howling]
-[Allison laughing] Yeah!

469
00:26:51,197 --> 00:26:53,491
[Max cat-calling] Sammy's turn.

470
00:26:54,618 --> 00:26:56,286
-[John laughing]
-[Max chanting] Sammy.

471
00:26:56,369 --> 00:26:58,580
-[Allison] She's so hot.
-[John] Okay.

472
00:27:00,165 --> 00:27:01,625
[Max] Come on, Sam. You got this.

473
00:27:02,125 --> 00:27:03,251
Make out with her.

474
00:27:03,627 --> 00:27:04,461
[Sam] I'm sorry.

475
00:27:05,378 --> 00:27:09,507
This is kind of weird.
I don't even really know you guys.

476
00:27:09,591 --> 00:27:12,052
[Max] Come on, Sam.
Freak you out, there, stud?

477
00:27:12,594 --> 00:27:14,929
-Sam, don't be a puss.
-[Sam] I don't even know you guys.

478
00:27:15,013 --> 00:27:16,306
[Sam] I'm not. I'm-- I just--

479
00:27:16,931 --> 00:27:19,059
-You're staring at me.
-[Max] Oh, we're not looking.

480
00:27:19,142 --> 00:27:20,352
[Allison] Hey, it's not weird.

481
00:27:20,852 --> 00:27:21,936
-[Bee] Hey.
-[John] Yeah.

482
00:27:22,020 --> 00:27:23,271
Just close your eyes.

483
00:27:23,688 --> 00:27:24,731
Okay?

484
00:27:24,814 --> 00:27:26,316
Pretend they're not even here.

485
00:27:27,233 --> 00:27:28,068
You can do this.

486
00:27:28,735 --> 00:27:29,778
You got this.

487
00:27:30,654 --> 00:27:31,696
[hushes]

488
00:27:35,533 --> 00:27:39,037
Just because I close my eyes
doesn't mean that they're not here.

489
00:27:41,414 --> 00:27:42,290
Do you trust me?

490
00:27:43,958 --> 00:27:44,793
Yes.

491
00:27:44,876 --> 00:27:46,044
Just relax.

492
00:27:47,045 --> 00:27:49,255
It's not weird, okay?
We're just having fun.

493
00:27:50,548 --> 00:27:52,050
[John howls]

494
00:27:52,634 --> 00:27:53,677
There he goes.

495
00:27:54,678 --> 00:27:55,679
[John chuckles]

496
00:28:10,443 --> 00:28:12,195
[screaming]

497
00:28:26,626 --> 00:28:27,502
Shh.

498
00:28:29,170 --> 00:28:32,298
You're helping fulfill a great purpose.
Know this.

499
00:28:32,841 --> 00:28:35,885
I don't wanna fulfill a great porpoise.

500
00:28:35,969 --> 00:28:38,263
[grunts] Did he just say "porpoise"?

501
00:28:38,346 --> 00:28:39,597
Yo, I think he did.

502
00:28:39,681 --> 00:28:41,766
He didn't even get a chance
to understand.

503
00:28:42,267 --> 00:28:43,476
[panting]

504
00:28:44,644 --> 00:28:45,562
Ready?

505
00:28:46,229 --> 00:28:47,480
-[Sonya] Ready.
-Yep.

506
00:28:48,940 --> 00:28:50,692
-[John grunts] Oh, okay.
-[exhales]

507
00:28:52,068 --> 00:28:53,361
[John] That shit leaking.

508
00:28:58,241 --> 00:29:01,411
Wait, hold on. My shit ain't working.
I think it ran out of blood.

509
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:04,164
-Oh, shit!
-Oh, shit.

510
00:29:04,247 --> 00:29:06,958
[John yells] Oh, shit!

511
00:29:07,041 --> 00:29:09,919
[Max]
All that blood was just in his boner.

512
00:29:10,003 --> 00:29:12,922
Max, don't laugh, okay?
John, relax. This blood is serving you.

513
00:29:13,006 --> 00:29:15,592
I did not sign up for this shit
to serve me in my mouth.

514
00:29:15,675 --> 00:29:18,219
This shit's still warm.
I think he got a fever.

515
00:29:18,303 --> 00:29:21,723
You know what you signed up for.
You want to go platinum, John?

516
00:29:21,806 --> 00:29:24,434
Things can get messy
when you make a deal with the devil.

517
00:29:24,517 --> 00:29:25,560
Now collect it.

518
00:29:25,643 --> 00:29:26,895
-[John] Like this?
-[Bee] There you go.

519
00:29:26,978 --> 00:29:30,440
[Allison] How long is this gonna take?
I just want my shit to come true.

520
00:29:31,191 --> 00:29:33,651
[Bee]
Allison, you'll all get what you want.

521
00:29:38,990 --> 00:29:40,408
Okay, let's go.

522
00:29:42,702 --> 00:29:45,079
[John] I don't think this is funny.
Look at my outfit.

523
00:29:45,163 --> 00:29:47,916
I just got this shit, you feel me?
Thirty percent off.

524
00:29:47,999 --> 00:29:50,668
Macy's. Top rack. I don't play games.

525
00:29:50,752 --> 00:29:52,420
You look like Carrie,

526
00:29:52,504 --> 00:29:55,006
-but black.
-Carrie would've been better black.

527
00:29:55,089 --> 00:29:57,634
She would have been covered in Hennessy,
all right?

528
00:29:57,717 --> 00:30:00,345
What are you wearing?
Looking like Big Bird's side bitch.

529
00:30:00,428 --> 00:30:03,556
I just came from a game.
That's why I'm wearing this, obviously.

530
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:05,016
I was not gonna miss this.

531
00:30:06,476 --> 00:30:10,313
Look at this shit.
That would go viral so hard.

532
00:30:10,396 --> 00:30:12,190
I mean, nobody's done human sacrifice.

533
00:30:12,273 --> 00:30:14,234
People have always done human sacrifice.

534
00:30:14,317 --> 00:30:18,238
Yeah, but, like...
not in America with hot people.

535
00:30:18,321 --> 00:30:20,615
Sonya, get the cases.

536
00:30:21,074 --> 00:30:23,618
Listen,
when you're done being totally useless,

537
00:30:23,701 --> 00:30:27,622
get a rag and wipe Sacrifice Samuel
out my damn eye. OMG.

538
00:30:27,705 --> 00:30:28,790
Hey.

539
00:30:28,873 --> 00:30:29,874
Nice one, John.

540
00:30:29,958 --> 00:30:32,252
[gasps] Oh, my God.

541
00:30:32,794 --> 00:30:35,129
I've got Sacrifice Samuel all over me.

542
00:30:36,172 --> 00:30:37,298
What's in the box?

543
00:30:42,470 --> 00:30:45,974
Yo, so, Bee, why do you need the book
if you already know what to do?

544
00:30:46,099 --> 00:30:48,309
It's like Jesus asking directions
to heaven.

545
00:30:48,518 --> 00:30:49,936
Just fucking go up, you know?

546
00:30:50,478 --> 00:30:54,107
Well, the Jews have their scrolls,

547
00:30:54,190 --> 00:30:55,984
Christians have their Bibles,

548
00:30:56,067 --> 00:30:57,861
and the devil has his verses.

549
00:30:58,403 --> 00:31:00,822
Don't touch it.
It's very old and very delicate.

550
00:31:01,364 --> 00:31:02,282
It's the only one.

551
00:31:02,991 --> 00:31:05,618
You recite the verse
while the blood hits the page.

552
00:31:05,702 --> 00:31:07,328
Without it, none of this happens.

553
00:31:09,330 --> 00:31:13,251
Let's get started before we head upstairs
and get the blood of the innocent.

554
00:31:13,334 --> 00:31:14,836
[gasps]

555
00:31:26,306 --> 00:31:27,432
[woman]
<i>911, what's your emergency?</i>

556
00:31:27,515 --> 00:31:30,476
My name is Cole Johnson.
A guy was murdered in my living room.

557
00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:33,438
The address is, uh... 2455 Bigby Drive.

558
00:31:33,521 --> 00:31:36,941
-Can you please send someone?
-<i>Are the attackers still in the house?</i>

559
00:31:37,025 --> 00:31:38,610
They're downstairs having a blast.

560
00:31:38,693 --> 00:31:40,653
-<i>How many are there, Cole?</i>
-Too many.

561
00:31:40,737 --> 00:31:44,407
Can you please get my mom?
She's at the Hyatt in the city.

562
00:31:44,574 --> 00:31:45,533
Living large.

563
00:31:45,617 --> 00:31:49,162
<i>Of course, Cole. Now listen to me.</i>
<i>It's important that you stay hidden.</i>

564
00:31:50,330 --> 00:31:53,458
-I gotta protect myself. Thanks.
<i>-Do not do that. No, no, no--</i>

565
00:32:20,109 --> 00:32:23,655
-Okay.
-[chattering]

566
00:32:36,834 --> 00:32:39,545
[Bee] ...we shed about 15 percent
of our dead cells.

567
00:32:39,629 --> 00:32:40,588
[John] Whoo!

568
00:32:42,090 --> 00:32:44,175
Yo, this kid's hobby
must be getting bullied.

569
00:32:45,969 --> 00:32:47,387
He's reading <i>The Secret?</i>

570
00:32:47,470 --> 00:32:50,056
He's ten years old.
What secret he need to know?

571
00:32:50,556 --> 00:32:51,599
Won't he hear us?

572
00:32:52,100 --> 00:32:54,978
With the amount of drugs I gave him?
Hell, no.

573
00:32:55,687 --> 00:32:59,691
-[Sonya] Good boy. Pretty boy.
-Do you have the needle?

574
00:33:01,776 --> 00:33:03,194
Of course, I have the needle.

575
00:33:08,366 --> 00:33:11,202
You know, there is a faster way
to get all that blood.

576
00:33:12,412 --> 00:33:14,038
[Bee] What happens when you kill someone?

577
00:33:14,122 --> 00:33:16,374
[John] They lose, like,
all they Instagram followers.

578
00:33:16,457 --> 00:33:19,502
-[gasps] Oh, my God, that would suck.
-No, they die.

579
00:33:19,585 --> 00:33:21,838
And then I'd have
to find another innocent kid.

580
00:33:21,921 --> 00:33:25,633
And all of this only works
if we get that top-shelf pure shit.

581
00:33:27,093 --> 00:33:29,345
And Cole is basically a faucet
of that for us.

582
00:33:41,524 --> 00:33:43,192
[Bee] After this, we finish the ritual...

583
00:33:44,277 --> 00:33:45,737
and your wish comes true.

584
00:33:49,198 --> 00:33:50,825
-Damn, I missed the vein.
-[Sonya] Mm.

585
00:33:53,036 --> 00:33:55,455
[Bee] Premium real estate. Go for it.

586
00:33:58,666 --> 00:34:00,668
[Sonya incanting]

587
00:34:09,135 --> 00:34:10,720
Wait, you gotta give him a Band-Aid.

588
00:34:10,803 --> 00:34:12,472
Okay. Let's go mix some blood.

589
00:34:12,555 --> 00:34:13,765
John, alley-oop.

590
00:34:14,849 --> 00:34:15,933
[John] LeBron James.

591
00:34:19,145 --> 00:34:19,979
Good boy.

592
00:34:43,711 --> 00:34:45,713
[panting]

593
00:35:49,110 --> 00:35:50,111
Why is he shirtless?

594
00:35:51,445 --> 00:35:55,032
-That's your first question?
-How can you ask that? Just look at him.

595
00:35:55,116 --> 00:35:56,200
I still don't get it.

596
00:35:59,245 --> 00:36:00,621
[grunting]

597
00:36:01,622 --> 00:36:02,874
Give him a cookie.

598
00:36:05,126 --> 00:36:07,962
-No, thanks.
-Eat the cookie.

599
00:36:08,546 --> 00:36:11,132
I just don't really like cookies, okay?
Bee knows that.

600
00:36:13,467 --> 00:36:15,595
You'll feel better if you eat.
You fainted.

601
00:36:15,678 --> 00:36:16,596
No, I didn't.

602
00:36:16,679 --> 00:36:17,513
Yes, you did.

603
00:36:18,681 --> 00:36:19,849
After I took your blood,

604
00:36:19,932 --> 00:36:22,310
I waited in the room,
because something felt off.

605
00:36:22,393 --> 00:36:25,229
I crouched behind the door.
A few seconds later, you got up,

606
00:36:25,313 --> 00:36:27,940
tied a sheet to your bed,
threw the sheet out the window.

607
00:36:28,024 --> 00:36:30,359
And then you fainted. So, you know...

608
00:36:30,443 --> 00:36:32,361
Your blood sugar is low. Eat the cookie.

609
00:36:38,451 --> 00:36:39,327
Are you mad at me?

610
00:36:39,911 --> 00:36:41,495
Cookie.

611
00:36:43,080 --> 00:36:45,416
This is gonna be so good.

612
00:36:47,084 --> 00:36:47,919
What the...

613
00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:50,087
Oh, there you go.

614
00:36:50,880 --> 00:36:52,006
There you go.

615
00:36:55,426 --> 00:36:56,427
That's a good boy.

616
00:37:04,727 --> 00:37:07,271
-Why are you awake, Cole?
-Because I couldn't sleep.

617
00:37:07,355 --> 00:37:09,232
-I don't believe you.
-[Cole] Okay, fine. I--

618
00:37:09,315 --> 00:37:10,900
I was gonna go smoke in the woods.

619
00:37:10,983 --> 00:37:12,693
[Bee] You were gonna go smoke
in the woods.

620
00:37:13,861 --> 00:37:17,073
Yeah. You know, like... marijuana.

621
00:37:17,156 --> 00:37:19,742
You weren't gonna share with your boy?
Come on, man.

622
00:37:19,825 --> 00:37:22,495
We could've got high,
listen to my mix tape. My shit's fire.

623
00:37:22,578 --> 00:37:24,956
-I wanna smoke pot.
-Why didn't you drink the shot?

624
00:37:25,039 --> 00:37:27,375
Why is he shirtless?
Why did you take my blood?

625
00:37:27,458 --> 00:37:30,002
-Cole.
-Okay. Fine. Because I don't like alcohol.

626
00:37:30,086 --> 00:37:32,713
I just drank it
because I wanted you to think I was cool.

627
00:37:35,841 --> 00:37:37,760
Why did you give a 12-year-old alcohol?

628
00:37:37,843 --> 00:37:40,513
'Cause I put shit in that alcohol
that makes them conk out

629
00:37:40,596 --> 00:37:41,764
for eight hours or more.

630
00:37:43,391 --> 00:37:44,517
What else did you see?

631
00:37:45,893 --> 00:37:47,395
I just see you.

632
00:37:48,187 --> 00:37:51,148
And these assholes,
who I don't know, in my house.

633
00:37:54,026 --> 00:37:57,363
-Why is his shirt covered in blood?
-No one would let me borrow a shirt.

634
00:37:58,322 --> 00:38:00,366
-That's not even an answer.
-Oh, my God.

635
00:38:00,449 --> 00:38:03,953
Does he not see the mirror behind him?
We can see you cutting the rope.

636
00:38:05,705 --> 00:38:06,789
Well, he does now.

637
00:38:09,166 --> 00:38:11,210
Aw, it's so cute,
you're still cutting the rope.

638
00:38:11,294 --> 00:38:13,838
Look at you.
You're really trying there, aren't you?

639
00:38:15,131 --> 00:38:17,717
-Why are you cutting ropes?
-I don't like being tied up.

640
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:19,677
-Why do you have a knife?
-It was a gift.

641
00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:20,636
Oh, my God.

642
00:38:21,262 --> 00:38:22,638
He's still cutting the ropes.

643
00:38:23,180 --> 00:38:25,141
Determined little fucker, aren't you?

644
00:38:26,642 --> 00:38:29,145
Look, I won't tell anyone.

645
00:38:29,228 --> 00:38:31,689
Okay? You know me.
I'm good with secrets.

646
00:38:32,064 --> 00:38:34,442
I won't tell my parents
that you were having an orgy

647
00:38:34,525 --> 00:38:35,860
and needed my blood to do it.

648
00:38:35,943 --> 00:38:37,403
[John and Allison laughing]

649
00:38:42,450 --> 00:38:44,493
Do you even know what an orgy is?

650
00:38:45,036 --> 00:38:47,079
I'm guessing it's something sad people do

651
00:38:47,163 --> 00:38:49,540
'cause they want other sad people
to like them,

652
00:38:50,041 --> 00:38:53,044
and they can forget for one minute
how sad they are in general.

653
00:38:54,128 --> 00:38:56,005
That's actually a pretty good answer.

654
00:38:56,630 --> 00:38:58,799
It was for a science project, okay?

655
00:38:59,550 --> 00:39:00,384
The orgy?

656
00:39:00,926 --> 00:39:02,386
No. The blood.

657
00:39:02,470 --> 00:39:04,722
Orgy is when a bunch of people
have sex together.

658
00:39:04,805 --> 00:39:06,057
We wouldn't need your blood for that.

659
00:39:09,060 --> 00:39:10,728
You could've just asked.

660
00:39:11,312 --> 00:39:13,773
I would've let you have some blood
for science.

661
00:39:13,898 --> 00:39:15,649
I knew you were afraid of needles.

662
00:39:15,733 --> 00:39:17,693
This was clearly a misunderstanding.

663
00:39:17,777 --> 00:39:18,944
Sonya, untie him.

664
00:39:19,945 --> 00:39:21,989
I'm sorry we scared you, Cole. We good?

665
00:39:22,365 --> 00:39:23,282
[police sirens wailing]

666
00:39:24,450 --> 00:39:25,910
-[John] Oh, shit.
-[screaming]

667
00:39:26,786 --> 00:39:28,746
-[Max] Shut up!
-Holy fuck!

668
00:39:28,829 --> 00:39:30,873
-Not good.
-Fucking police.

669
00:39:31,457 --> 00:39:33,209
Why are the cops outside, Cole?

670
00:39:33,542 --> 00:39:35,211
-I don't know.
-Did you call them?

671
00:39:35,294 --> 00:39:38,005
-No. You said you were in the room.
-Makes me think you saw something

672
00:39:38,089 --> 00:39:40,466
that scared you enough
to call the cops. Right, Cole?

673
00:39:42,176 --> 00:39:43,844
-[knock on door]
-Oh, fuck!

674
00:39:43,928 --> 00:39:45,012
Answer me, Cole.

675
00:39:45,554 --> 00:39:47,973
Help! Help!
I'm tied up inside! They're about--

676
00:39:48,849 --> 00:39:50,101
[grunts] Ow.

677
00:39:51,102 --> 00:39:52,728
-Oh, shit!
-[officer] Everybody, freeze!

678
00:39:52,812 --> 00:39:55,356
[officer 2] Hands up, now!
Put your hands up! Now!

679
00:39:55,439 --> 00:39:56,482
-Now!
-[Max] Here we go.

680
00:39:56,565 --> 00:39:57,942
-[officer] Hands up!
-[John] Oh!

681
00:39:58,067 --> 00:39:59,819
[screaming]

682
00:39:59,902 --> 00:40:01,695
-[chuckles]
-[officer] Shit!

683
00:40:01,779 --> 00:40:05,324
Hands up. Don't shoot, man.
Black lives matter, too. You feel me?

684
00:40:05,408 --> 00:40:06,867
[Allison] Bee!

685
00:40:06,992 --> 00:40:07,952
-Oh!
-[Max] Oh, shit!

686
00:40:08,744 --> 00:40:09,829
Titty gone!

687
00:40:10,371 --> 00:40:11,497
Titty gone!

688
00:40:11,580 --> 00:40:14,667
Don't you move. Keep your hands up.
Nobody move!

689
00:40:15,835 --> 00:40:17,503
-[screams]
-Don't you move.

690
00:40:17,586 --> 00:40:18,921
[John] Chill with the gun stuff.

691
00:40:19,004 --> 00:40:21,090
Chill. You Mexican, right?
Look, I speak Spa--

692
00:40:21,173 --> 00:40:23,217
<i>Lo siento, </i>my nigga, <i>lo siento.</i>

693
00:40:24,635 --> 00:40:26,095
[shouting]

694
00:40:26,470 --> 00:40:28,431
-Are you serious?
-[laughing]

695
00:40:30,307 --> 00:40:31,684
[screaming]

696
00:40:31,767 --> 00:40:33,144
[John] Max, what you doing, man?

697
00:40:33,227 --> 00:40:35,563
-[John] Max, what you doing, man?
-No, no, no!

698
00:40:36,313 --> 00:40:37,565
-[officer 2 shouting]
-Oh.

699
00:40:38,732 --> 00:40:40,401
[grunting]

700
00:40:40,484 --> 00:40:41,318
No!

701
00:40:43,028 --> 00:40:44,280
Harder.

702
00:40:45,990 --> 00:40:47,741
[screaming]

703
00:40:48,367 --> 00:40:49,410
Whoo!

704
00:40:49,493 --> 00:40:52,288
Look, man.
Three out of four people got an STD.

705
00:40:52,455 --> 00:40:54,039
I got two people's blood on me.

706
00:40:54,540 --> 00:40:57,293
You do the math.
I got AIDS. I know I got AIDS.

707
00:40:57,376 --> 00:40:58,669
You killed him!

708
00:40:59,170 --> 00:41:01,422
-Kind of your fault, bud.
-Are you insane?

709
00:41:01,505 --> 00:41:02,840
No, Cole. I'm just trying--

710
00:41:02,923 --> 00:41:06,594
[man on radio] <i>What's the status</i>
<i>of that 187 call on Bigby Drive?</i>

711
00:41:09,388 --> 00:41:10,431
[John] Look, man.

712
00:41:10,514 --> 00:41:12,766
I can't go to jail.
Y'all killed the cops, man.

713
00:41:12,850 --> 00:41:14,560
I ain't involved with this shit.

714
00:41:14,727 --> 00:41:16,103
It's fine. Max, pick it up.

715
00:41:16,562 --> 00:41:17,480
[Max chuckles]

716
00:41:17,730 --> 00:41:19,064
[John] It's the statistics.

717
00:41:19,148 --> 00:41:21,650
They say you either end up in jail
or dead.

718
00:41:22,151 --> 00:41:24,069
It's gonna be both for me, Bee.

719
00:41:24,153 --> 00:41:26,864
-What's the code for "all clear"?
-[man] <i>What's your status?</i>

720
00:41:27,406 --> 00:41:28,991
Just say "all clear."

721
00:41:29,074 --> 00:41:30,534
[Sonya] Why would he know cop codes?

722
00:41:30,618 --> 00:41:31,952
[Cole shouts]

723
00:41:32,203 --> 00:41:34,121
Stop screaming and act like an adult.

724
00:41:34,205 --> 00:41:36,081
What's the code? I know you know it.

725
00:41:36,165 --> 00:41:38,209
Little boy here a nerd.
Tell them the codes.

726
00:41:38,792 --> 00:41:39,710
What's the code?

727
00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:42,046
-Ten-fifty-three.
-[John] Punch that shit in.

728
00:41:42,546 --> 00:41:45,049
-[man] <i>Bynak, you there?</i>
-Wait.

729
00:41:47,551 --> 00:41:50,012
[Bee] You don't get it.
You look away when you lie.

730
00:41:52,056 --> 00:41:54,141
You look me in the eyes
and tell me the truth.

731
00:41:54,225 --> 00:41:55,976
What is the code for "all clear"?

732
00:42:02,650 --> 00:42:05,027
It's 10-4. Obviously.

733
00:42:05,110 --> 00:42:07,279
What's "we're taking a break to get food"?

734
00:42:07,363 --> 00:42:09,406
-[Cole] Say we're taking a break to--
-[Bee] Cole.

735
00:42:09,573 --> 00:42:11,450
[man] <i>Officer Bynak, you need backup?</i>

736
00:42:11,867 --> 00:42:13,077
Code seven.

737
00:42:17,623 --> 00:42:19,875
Ten-four, all clear. We're code seven.

738
00:42:25,506 --> 00:42:26,632
[man] <i>Ten-four.</i>
<i>Enjoy your double-double.</i>

739
00:42:30,135 --> 00:42:31,387
Should've been a cop.

740
00:42:34,098 --> 00:42:36,141
[screaming]

741
00:42:37,017 --> 00:42:37,935
Shit.

742
00:42:38,018 --> 00:42:39,645
[groaning] Ow, ow!

743
00:42:41,188 --> 00:42:42,690
[Allison] Oh, my God. Guys.

744
00:42:43,148 --> 00:42:45,526
Oh, my God!

745
00:42:45,609 --> 00:42:47,945
Fucking help me. What are you doing?

746
00:42:48,237 --> 00:42:50,489
Oh, my God. He shot me in the boob.

747
00:42:50,573 --> 00:42:53,367
What kind of dick shoots a girl
in the boob?

748
00:42:54,577 --> 00:42:58,205
-I did not sign up for this shit.
-Stop complaining. Stop all your whining.

749
00:42:58,289 --> 00:43:01,208
They're totally gonna stop growing.
They weren't even done.

750
00:43:01,292 --> 00:43:03,127
Sometimes you gotta settle, all right?

751
00:43:03,210 --> 00:43:05,504
I got a cousin Chantelle, titties flat.

752
00:43:05,588 --> 00:43:06,922
Personality real good.

753
00:43:07,006 --> 00:43:08,465
Ow. Oh, my God.

754
00:43:08,549 --> 00:43:10,467
-Ow! You fucking bitch.
-[Sonya laughs]

755
00:43:10,551 --> 00:43:11,719
What's wrong with you?

756
00:43:12,845 --> 00:43:16,140
-Get away from me with your fucking beret.
-She's gonna bleed out.

757
00:43:17,057 --> 00:43:18,017
What? No.

758
00:43:18,100 --> 00:43:20,185
What do you mean, I'm gonna bleed?

759
00:43:20,269 --> 00:43:22,438
Can we just stick a tampon in it
or something?

760
00:43:22,938 --> 00:43:25,983
Oh, my God.
We need to call an ambulance, guys.

761
00:43:26,066 --> 00:43:28,819
I need an ambulance.
I don't wanna lose my boob.

762
00:43:28,902 --> 00:43:29,945
I can't do that.

763
00:43:30,029 --> 00:43:30,863
[Allison] What?

764
00:43:31,697 --> 00:43:32,656
Why not?

765
00:43:32,740 --> 00:43:35,075
Because your boob was shot
by a now-dead cop.

766
00:43:35,159 --> 00:43:36,327
Have fun explaining that.

767
00:43:36,410 --> 00:43:38,787
No dude's gonna motorboat these, Bee.

768
00:43:38,871 --> 00:43:40,497
-[crying]
-[mimicking motorboat]

769
00:43:40,581 --> 00:43:43,042
How you like it?
You want them quick or you want them long?

770
00:43:43,125 --> 00:43:46,045
[continues mimicking motorboat]
You want a little spit on them?

771
00:43:48,213 --> 00:43:49,048
[Bee] Cole!

772
00:43:49,340 --> 00:43:51,175
-[Allison] Oh, my God.
-[John] Hey, hey, hey.

773
00:43:51,258 --> 00:43:53,594
Who's gonna want to suck on my nipples?

774
00:43:53,886 --> 00:43:54,720
No one.

775
00:43:54,803 --> 00:43:56,889
[John] Cole. Come here, Cole.
Stop running.

776
00:43:57,389 --> 00:43:59,850
Come here, little baby.
Yeah. Come here, buddy.

777
00:43:59,933 --> 00:44:01,935
Just wanna talk. Just wanna talk.

778
00:44:02,519 --> 00:44:03,729
Son of a bitch.

779
00:44:03,812 --> 00:44:05,731
Hey, this ain't <i>Home Alone.</i>
Hey, hey, hey.

780
00:44:06,106 --> 00:44:06,940
Oh, shit.

781
00:44:13,238 --> 00:44:14,073
[exhales]

782
00:44:18,327 --> 00:44:19,703
Oh, shit.

783
00:44:20,996 --> 00:44:23,499
Right in the jugular. Yeah! [chuckles]

784
00:44:25,000 --> 00:44:25,959
[gasps]

785
00:44:26,043 --> 00:44:27,920
-Get him.
-I got him.

786
00:44:28,003 --> 00:44:30,214
I'm gonna kill you with my bare hands.

787
00:44:30,297 --> 00:44:31,131
Whoo!

788
00:44:31,215 --> 00:44:33,676
-Now I gotta clean this up.
-[Max] Run, Cole!

789
00:44:34,510 --> 00:44:35,803
I'm coming for you.

790
00:44:37,346 --> 00:44:38,889
Open the door, Cole.

791
00:44:41,308 --> 00:44:43,310
No locked doors, Cole!

792
00:44:43,394 --> 00:44:46,271
Open the door. We just wanna talk, Cole.

793
00:44:49,608 --> 00:44:50,901
Come on, Cole!

794
00:44:57,616 --> 00:44:59,076
[panting]

795
00:45:05,541 --> 00:45:07,501
Hey, Coley. How's it hanging?

796
00:45:08,127 --> 00:45:09,253
[fabric stretching]

797
00:45:09,878 --> 00:45:11,922
Please, don't kill me. Please.

798
00:45:15,884 --> 00:45:17,553
No. You're gonna kill me. No.

799
00:45:19,012 --> 00:45:21,390
Max. It's okay, Max. Please.

800
00:45:22,975 --> 00:45:24,143
Got you.

801
00:45:25,686 --> 00:45:26,812
Ow!

802
00:45:27,354 --> 00:45:29,606
Whoa. Deep breaths, buddy.

803
00:45:30,399 --> 00:45:31,692
[coughs, groans]

804
00:45:38,282 --> 00:45:39,700
[Max] I'm right on your ass, Coley!

805
00:45:39,783 --> 00:45:40,826
Keep moving!

806
00:45:43,245 --> 00:45:44,455
Come on, Cole!

807
00:45:47,124 --> 00:45:48,584
Where are you, you little shit?

808
00:45:49,376 --> 00:45:50,544
Cole.

809
00:45:51,420 --> 00:45:52,254
Coley.

810
00:45:52,337 --> 00:45:53,172
[panting]

811
00:46:13,150 --> 00:46:14,485
[shouts]

812
00:46:22,034 --> 00:46:23,160
There's a dead guy...

813
00:46:25,120 --> 00:46:25,954
I'm sorry.

814
00:46:28,040 --> 00:46:28,874
I'm sorry.

815
00:46:31,919 --> 00:46:33,462
[shouting]

816
00:46:35,088 --> 00:46:36,381
Okay. Okay. Okay.

817
00:46:37,883 --> 00:46:39,301
Bug spray. Blanket.

818
00:46:42,471 --> 00:46:43,305
Lighter.

819
00:46:52,272 --> 00:46:54,650
Whoa. The Fat Dragon.

820
00:46:58,737 --> 00:46:59,696
[Max] Coley!

821
00:47:02,074 --> 00:47:03,408
Cole!

822
00:47:06,745 --> 00:47:08,914
Come out and play!

823
00:47:25,848 --> 00:47:28,141
[Cole panting]

824
00:47:40,696 --> 00:47:42,155
[footsteps above]

825
00:48:32,623 --> 00:48:34,249
[Sonya whispers] Is this where you are?

826
00:48:36,460 --> 00:48:37,836
[laughing]

827
00:48:40,047 --> 00:48:42,049
[Sonya hums]

828
00:49:03,862 --> 00:49:04,905
[creaking]

829
00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:09,117
[shouts]

830
00:49:22,714 --> 00:49:24,675
Are you right... here?

831
00:49:36,645 --> 00:49:37,854
Good boy.

832
00:49:40,065 --> 00:49:40,983
[gasps]

833
00:49:41,066 --> 00:49:42,734
Beautiful boy.

834
00:49:46,113 --> 00:49:47,572
So soft, so pretty.

835
00:49:47,656 --> 00:49:49,324
[Max] Coley!

836
00:49:50,450 --> 00:49:53,036
-Where's Cole?
-[Sonya] Ugh.

837
00:49:54,413 --> 00:49:58,291
[Max] Sonya, bring your cookies
and help me find this little fuck.

838
00:49:58,500 --> 00:50:00,127
[Sonya] I'm coming.

839
00:50:00,669 --> 00:50:01,670
[whimpers]

840
00:50:13,598 --> 00:50:14,933
Hi, Cole.

841
00:50:15,851 --> 00:50:17,185
Oh, God.

842
00:50:17,269 --> 00:50:20,772
How long do you think
it'll take your parents

843
00:50:21,189 --> 00:50:23,900
to find your body down here? [chuckles]

844
00:50:24,526 --> 00:50:25,360
Tomorrow?

845
00:50:26,862 --> 00:50:28,155
Two days from now?

846
00:50:28,780 --> 00:50:29,906
Even later?

847
00:50:29,990 --> 00:50:34,286
Probably when your body starts
to reek like cheese.

848
00:50:34,369 --> 00:50:38,081
[laughs]
Or we could just burn your body, Cole.

849
00:50:38,457 --> 00:50:40,292
It would be so beautiful.

850
00:50:41,209 --> 00:50:42,252
[Sonya screams]

851
00:50:42,961 --> 00:50:44,463
[laughs] Oh, you missed.

852
00:50:45,547 --> 00:50:46,923
[Sonya screams]

853
00:50:47,007 --> 00:50:48,050
My nails!

854
00:50:48,759 --> 00:50:53,430
Cole! Cole! [grunts]

855
00:50:54,264 --> 00:50:56,558
-[thuds]
-[grunts]

856
00:50:57,350 --> 00:51:01,063
I'm gonna make sure
you hurt before you die, Cole.

857
00:51:04,775 --> 00:51:07,319
Cut your fingers off. Every single one.

858
00:51:07,402 --> 00:51:08,779
Come here, Cole!

859
00:51:08,862 --> 00:51:11,865
I'm making
a human self-centipede. Yeah!

860
00:51:16,078 --> 00:51:18,246
Human self-centipede, child!

861
00:51:18,330 --> 00:51:20,582
Gonna taste so good, Cole!

862
00:51:20,665 --> 00:51:23,168
Your mouth is gonna get sewn
to your ass, Cole!

863
00:51:23,251 --> 00:51:25,045
Your mouthy ass!

864
00:51:25,837 --> 00:51:28,298
[screaming]

865
00:51:32,219 --> 00:51:33,595
[Sonya continues screaming]

866
00:51:40,560 --> 00:51:42,145
I'm still alive motherfuck--

867
00:51:42,229 --> 00:51:43,396
[loud bang]

868
00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:45,148
[gasping]

869
00:51:48,110 --> 00:51:49,111
[coughing]

870
00:51:56,076 --> 00:51:57,953
[applauding]

871
00:52:03,583 --> 00:52:05,127
Did you just blow up Sonya?

872
00:52:06,503 --> 00:52:07,337
No.

873
00:52:08,588 --> 00:52:11,091
I mean, I'm not even mad.
I'm a little surprised.

874
00:52:11,466 --> 00:52:12,592
What did that?

875
00:52:13,593 --> 00:52:14,553
A firework.

876
00:52:14,636 --> 00:52:15,470
A firework?

877
00:52:15,554 --> 00:52:16,805
Holy shit.

878
00:52:17,806 --> 00:52:18,974
Damn, good for you, kid.

879
00:52:19,683 --> 00:52:20,976
That is awesome.

880
00:52:21,309 --> 00:52:23,311
So, you want a head start?

881
00:52:24,479 --> 00:52:27,274
-Come on, you're the quarterback.
-Life's not fair, dude.

882
00:52:27,357 --> 00:52:28,441
You guys suck.

883
00:52:28,525 --> 00:52:29,651
You just blew up Sonya.

884
00:52:33,071 --> 00:52:34,322
You can't outrun me, Cole.

885
00:52:37,576 --> 00:52:40,370
Wait until they've almost got you,
drop like a bag of rocks.

886
00:52:41,580 --> 00:52:42,789
[Max grunts]

887
00:52:43,415 --> 00:52:44,666
[Bee] <i>Kick him in the dick.</i>

888
00:52:44,749 --> 00:52:45,584
<i>Dick.</i>

889
00:52:45,667 --> 00:52:46,710
[Max groans]

890
00:52:55,635 --> 00:52:56,469
Whoo!

891
00:52:59,139 --> 00:53:00,432
You missed my dick.

892
00:53:01,266 --> 00:53:02,976
-No, I didn't.
-Pretty sure you did.

893
00:53:03,059 --> 00:53:04,186
And I got a big dick.

894
00:53:04,978 --> 00:53:05,812
No, you don't.

895
00:53:05,896 --> 00:53:07,022
That's just hurtful.

896
00:53:07,314 --> 00:53:08,773
[shouting]

897
00:53:09,858 --> 00:53:10,901
Please, don't-- Don't--

898
00:53:13,653 --> 00:53:14,988
[gasping]

899
00:53:15,071 --> 00:53:16,198
[Max] No whining.

900
00:53:16,281 --> 00:53:17,157
Save some dignity.

901
00:53:20,452 --> 00:53:21,411
[egg breaking]

902
00:53:23,663 --> 00:53:26,249
-What the hell is that?
-[gasping]

903
00:53:26,333 --> 00:53:27,792
-Huh?
-It's Jeremy.

904
00:53:29,002 --> 00:53:30,086
-What?
-Eggs.

905
00:53:31,129 --> 00:53:32,130
Eggs.

906
00:53:32,672 --> 00:53:33,506
Eggs?

907
00:53:33,965 --> 00:53:36,134
You gotta be shitting me.

908
00:53:36,718 --> 00:53:38,595
Somebody's egging your house?

909
00:53:44,017 --> 00:53:46,019
[crowd cheering]

910
00:53:46,603 --> 00:53:47,479
[Max] Who is this kid?

911
00:53:48,438 --> 00:53:49,481
Just an asshole.

912
00:53:49,564 --> 00:53:51,274
-He egg your house a lot?
-Sometimes.

913
00:53:51,816 --> 00:53:54,361
-[Max] So, what are you gonna do about it?
-What?

914
00:53:54,444 --> 00:53:57,572
I said, are you gonna let that little punk
come on to your property,

915
00:53:57,656 --> 00:54:00,075
your family's property
and disrespect you like that?

916
00:54:04,996 --> 00:54:09,042
No. Hell, no. This is America.
You need to wreck his ass.

917
00:54:11,253 --> 00:54:12,837
Are you kidding me?

918
00:54:12,921 --> 00:54:15,006
Get out there and crush that bitch.

919
00:54:15,757 --> 00:54:16,591
Go.

920
00:54:20,553 --> 00:54:22,639
[chuckles] Well, well, well.

921
00:54:23,265 --> 00:54:24,516
It's Cole sore.

922
00:54:25,183 --> 00:54:26,559
I like your pajamas.

923
00:54:27,519 --> 00:54:29,187
-Thanks. My mom made them.
-[scoffs]

924
00:54:30,522 --> 00:54:31,690
You wanna do something?

925
00:54:33,525 --> 00:54:35,068
You know what I'm gonna do?

926
00:54:35,151 --> 00:54:36,194
What's that?

927
00:54:38,405 --> 00:54:40,240
I'm gonna take this right foot,

928
00:54:41,074 --> 00:54:44,119
and I'm gonna whop you
on that side of your face.

929
00:54:46,913 --> 00:54:49,499
And there's not a damn thing
you can do about it.

930
00:54:49,582 --> 00:54:51,501
[chuckles] Really?

931
00:54:53,086 --> 00:54:54,212
Really.

932
00:54:56,381 --> 00:54:58,091
I'm gonna wreck your ass.

933
00:54:58,717 --> 00:54:59,551
[grunts]

934
00:55:02,304 --> 00:55:03,346
[grunts]

935
00:55:04,139 --> 00:55:06,099
What the hell was that?
You must be crazy.

936
00:55:06,182 --> 00:55:08,643
Jeremy, you have to listen to me, okay?

937
00:55:08,893 --> 00:55:11,229
There's a guy over there
who's trying to kill me.

938
00:55:11,313 --> 00:55:13,189
-I swear to God.
-I swear to God.

939
00:55:13,273 --> 00:55:14,816
-I'm serious.
-I'm serious.

940
00:55:14,899 --> 00:55:16,651
There are dead bodies in my house.

941
00:55:17,527 --> 00:55:20,530
-Wait, seriously?
-The cops came. They killed the cops.

942
00:55:21,364 --> 00:55:24,409
-Where is the cop car?
-They're crazy. They're covering it up.

943
00:55:24,909 --> 00:55:27,912
Okay? If you get me out of this,
I'll wear a blue headband.

944
00:55:27,996 --> 00:55:30,999
I'll give you foot massages.
I'll do your homework until college.

945
00:55:31,082 --> 00:55:32,417
Oh, okay, okay.

946
00:55:33,168 --> 00:55:34,002
I'll help you.

947
00:55:35,462 --> 00:55:36,338
-Really?
-Yeah.

948
00:55:36,421 --> 00:55:38,798
I mean, if you die,
who am I gonna pick on?

949
00:55:40,175 --> 00:55:41,009
Exactly.

950
00:55:41,468 --> 00:55:43,303
Okay, so, here's the plan.

951
00:55:43,803 --> 00:55:45,972
On three,
we're gonna make a run for my bike.

952
00:55:46,056 --> 00:55:48,767
-You're gonna ride in the back. All right?
-Thank you.

953
00:55:50,018 --> 00:55:51,436
One, two--

954
00:55:52,979 --> 00:55:54,230
[Jeremy laughing]

955
00:55:55,982 --> 00:55:58,151
Have fun getting murdered, colon cancer.

956
00:55:59,277 --> 00:56:00,236
Ooh-whah, ooh-whah.

957
00:56:01,154 --> 00:56:02,322
Ooh-whah, ooh-whah.

958
00:56:07,952 --> 00:56:09,329
You talk too much.

959
00:56:10,038 --> 00:56:11,623
Crack him in the face next time.

960
00:56:13,208 --> 00:56:15,210
Not bad.
At least you stood up for yourself.

961
00:56:16,836 --> 00:56:18,213
You gonna let me go now?

962
00:56:18,421 --> 00:56:19,631
[Max laughs]

963
00:56:19,714 --> 00:56:20,965
[sighs]

964
00:56:21,841 --> 00:56:22,675
No.

965
00:56:25,387 --> 00:56:27,555
But if you kill me,
you won't get what you want.

966
00:56:28,056 --> 00:56:29,516
No, I'm not like the others.

967
00:56:29,599 --> 00:56:31,267
I came here to kill people.

968
00:56:34,229 --> 00:56:36,648
Yes! That's what I'm talking about, Cole!

969
00:56:36,731 --> 00:56:38,441
Come on, buddy! Whoo!

970
00:56:40,944 --> 00:56:42,112
Come on, Coley.

971
00:56:42,695 --> 00:56:45,657
Come on, buddy. I'm right behind you.
Move your ass, Cole.

972
00:56:46,241 --> 00:56:47,492
Whoo!

973
00:56:48,284 --> 00:56:49,452
Coming for you.

974
00:56:49,702 --> 00:56:51,329
-[Cole screams]
-Whoo!

975
00:56:52,080 --> 00:56:53,623
Come on, buddy. Get moving.

976
00:56:53,706 --> 00:56:55,542
[Max laughs]

977
00:56:57,043 --> 00:56:58,128
Come on, buddy.

978
00:56:58,753 --> 00:56:59,587
Let's go!

979
00:57:00,588 --> 00:57:02,507
Come on! Get up there! Come on!

980
00:57:03,383 --> 00:57:04,884
[singsong] Coley.

981
00:57:05,677 --> 00:57:08,096
Come down and play.

982
00:57:09,347 --> 00:57:10,682
[grunting]

983
00:57:12,434 --> 00:57:13,393
Coley.

984
00:57:16,187 --> 00:57:17,021
Come on, Cole.

985
00:57:19,524 --> 00:57:22,026
Chi-chi-chi, chi-chi-chi, ah

986
00:57:23,820 --> 00:57:26,322
Chi-chi-chi, chi-chi-chi, ah

987
00:57:27,323 --> 00:57:28,825
Stuck in the tree.

988
00:57:29,242 --> 00:57:30,952
No way down!

989
00:57:33,455 --> 00:57:35,415
Coley.

990
00:57:38,418 --> 00:57:40,753
Coley.

991
00:57:42,922 --> 00:57:44,215
Coley.

992
00:57:45,967 --> 00:57:47,552
[panting]

993
00:57:49,596 --> 00:57:50,513
[gasping] Where is he?

994
00:58:09,491 --> 00:58:10,658
[screams]

995
00:58:11,493 --> 00:58:13,036
[in normal voice] You're a badass kid.

996
00:58:13,703 --> 00:58:14,662
Relax, Max.

997
00:58:17,999 --> 00:58:19,501
You don't have to do this.

998
00:58:19,584 --> 00:58:22,170
Well, I kind of have to do this.

999
00:58:23,838 --> 00:58:26,883
Don't worry. I'm not gonna let you die
with egg on your face.

1000
00:58:27,717 --> 00:58:29,010
You poor bastard.

1001
00:58:29,093 --> 00:58:30,929
You deserve better than this.

1002
00:58:37,936 --> 00:58:40,188
Tonight you get an honorable death.

1003
00:58:40,688 --> 00:58:42,565
Tonight you die a man.

1004
00:58:43,483 --> 00:58:44,609
I don't wanna die a man.

1005
00:58:44,692 --> 00:58:45,652
[both grunting]

1006
00:58:50,740 --> 00:58:52,951
[Max grunts]

1007
00:58:55,870 --> 00:58:56,955
[Cole shouts]

1008
00:59:03,962 --> 00:59:05,338
[gunshot]

1009
00:59:06,256 --> 00:59:07,840
Why are there guns?

1010
00:59:09,634 --> 00:59:10,468
[gun cocks]

1011
00:59:16,266 --> 00:59:17,392
[gunshot]

1012
00:59:18,017 --> 00:59:19,310
Come here. Come here.

1013
00:59:20,562 --> 00:59:23,147
-Was that a gun?
-I got the two guys and the Asian girl.

1014
00:59:23,231 --> 00:59:25,984
-The cheerleader got shot. It's just Bee.
-What is going on?

1015
00:59:26,067 --> 00:59:29,153
Bee murdered the geek. Stole my blood.
Tied me up. Killed the cops.

1016
00:59:29,237 --> 00:59:31,573
-You're really freaking me out.
-I'm... sorry.

1017
00:59:32,949 --> 00:59:33,783
Bee is bad?

1018
00:59:35,785 --> 00:59:37,078
Yeah. Bee is bad.

1019
00:59:37,662 --> 00:59:39,706
-Where's your dad?
-Out with some Protestant.

1020
00:59:39,789 --> 00:59:43,001
-But his car's here.
-She picked him up. He's really desperate.

1021
00:59:43,501 --> 00:59:45,753
Am I the only one
that still has a babysitter?

1022
00:59:46,504 --> 00:59:47,380
Yeah.

1023
00:59:48,339 --> 00:59:50,425
-So, what do we do?
-Pray.

1024
00:59:51,384 --> 00:59:53,511
-Okay.
-I was kidding.

1025
00:59:53,595 --> 00:59:55,888
-Oh.
-But it's probably a great idea, though.

1026
00:59:58,391 --> 00:59:59,809
[both gasp]

1027
01:00:00,476 --> 01:00:01,311
Come on.

1028
01:00:09,736 --> 01:00:12,071
-You think she can get in here?
-Not if it's locked.

1029
01:00:12,614 --> 01:00:14,574
[Cole] Your door automatically locks,
right?

1030
01:00:17,410 --> 01:00:18,244
[Melanie] Nope.

1031
01:01:17,053 --> 01:01:18,221
[gasps]

1032
01:01:36,155 --> 01:01:38,157
[phone buzzes and jingle plays]

1033
01:01:57,301 --> 01:01:58,136
[gun cocks]

1034
01:02:02,765 --> 01:02:04,183
[pants]

1035
01:02:21,033 --> 01:02:23,995
-I shouldn't have gotten you into this.
-You were being shot at.

1036
01:02:24,078 --> 01:02:25,913
Especially because I was being shot at.

1037
01:02:25,997 --> 01:02:28,833
You're my best friend, I'm sorry.
I'm gonna take care of this.

1038
01:02:28,916 --> 01:02:30,293
-Do you have your phone?
-Yeah.

1039
01:02:30,376 --> 01:02:33,921
-Call the cops. Tell them it's a 10-53.
-Why do you know cop codes?

1040
01:02:34,464 --> 01:02:37,467
Because I used to wanna be a cop
when I grew up.

1041
01:02:39,469 --> 01:02:40,720
You never told me that.

1042
01:02:41,262 --> 01:02:43,181
I know. I only told Bee.

1043
01:02:43,264 --> 01:02:45,099
[Dusty Springfield's "Spooky" playing]

1044
01:02:46,976 --> 01:02:47,810
Are you okay?

1045
01:02:50,188 --> 01:02:51,481
I've had a really bad night.

1046
01:02:52,482 --> 01:02:53,441
♪ <i>And then I stop </i>♪

1047
01:02:55,109 --> 01:02:56,903
♪<i> And say "all right" ♪</i>

1048
01:02:57,195 --> 01:03:01,949
<i>♪ Love is kind of crazy</i>
<i>With a spooky little boy like you ♪</i>

1049
01:03:02,617 --> 01:03:06,996
Uh... The last guy I saw get kissed
got stabbed in the head by two knives.

1050
01:03:07,079 --> 01:03:08,206
<i>♪ You always keep me guessing ♪</i>

1051
01:03:08,289 --> 01:03:11,125
<i>♪ I never seem to know</i>
<i>What you're thinking ♪</i>

1052
01:03:11,334 --> 01:03:14,086
Just because she's a psychopath
doesn't mean women are evil.

1053
01:03:16,214 --> 01:03:17,131
I know that.

1054
01:03:20,426 --> 01:03:21,886
I wish all girls were like you.

1055
01:03:21,969 --> 01:03:23,638
♪<i> And then you smile </i>♪

1056
01:03:24,138 --> 01:03:24,972
[chuckles softly]

1057
01:03:26,808 --> 01:03:28,142
I'm gonna put an end to this.

1058
01:03:29,101 --> 01:03:29,977
What are you doing?

1059
01:03:30,061 --> 01:03:32,563
-Keeping you safe.
-The lock is on the inside, dumbass.

1060
01:03:35,399 --> 01:03:36,609
That was sweet of you.

1061
01:03:39,821 --> 01:03:41,322
I'm really excited we kissed.

1062
01:03:41,906 --> 01:03:43,991
Me, too. Let's make out next time.

1063
01:03:45,326 --> 01:03:46,160
Okay. Bye.

1064
01:03:51,624 --> 01:03:53,251
Come and get me, Bee!

1065
01:03:54,293 --> 01:03:55,419
I'm right here!

1066
01:03:55,628 --> 01:03:56,963
It's just you and me!

1067
01:03:57,255 --> 01:03:58,548
It's just you and me!

1068
01:03:59,215 --> 01:04:00,883
What, you're gonna get shy now?!

1069
01:04:01,634 --> 01:04:03,219
I'm going towards my house!

1070
01:04:03,469 --> 01:04:04,762
I'm right here, Bee!

1071
01:04:04,929 --> 01:04:06,097
I'm right here!

1072
01:04:08,808 --> 01:04:09,976
What the hell?

1073
01:04:10,893 --> 01:04:12,812
Oh, my God. Where is everything?

1074
01:04:13,354 --> 01:04:15,398
[panting]

1075
01:04:18,234 --> 01:04:19,902
[floor creaking]

1076
01:04:20,653 --> 01:04:21,904
Oh, my God.

1077
01:04:27,034 --> 01:04:28,786
[board creaks]

1078
01:04:37,628 --> 01:04:38,754
[gasping]

1079
01:05:10,661 --> 01:05:11,996
[gasps]

1080
01:05:49,867 --> 01:05:51,077
[gasps]

1081
01:06:07,927 --> 01:06:11,013
"Sacrifice... Get your dreams..."

1082
01:06:13,891 --> 01:06:15,726
[both grunting]

1083
01:06:17,603 --> 01:06:19,814
-Get off me!
-I'm gonna kill you!

1084
01:06:20,773 --> 01:06:22,233
I'm gonna kill you!

1085
01:06:24,527 --> 01:06:25,820
Oh, my God!

1086
01:06:25,903 --> 01:06:27,029
Oh, my God!

1087
01:06:28,239 --> 01:06:30,700
What's wrong with you,
you little pervert?

1088
01:06:30,783 --> 01:06:34,203
What? You can't make me feel bad
because I defended myself.

1089
01:06:34,286 --> 01:06:38,290
I knew you wanted me this whole time,
upstairs in your little room jerking off.

1090
01:06:38,374 --> 01:06:40,835
-You're just sick.
-You were trying to kill me.

1091
01:06:40,918 --> 01:06:43,462
I wasn't trying to kill you
by punching your dick.

1092
01:06:43,546 --> 01:06:46,590
[shouts] I've never felt
so violated before.

1093
01:06:47,174 --> 01:06:48,009
Oh, God.

1094
01:06:48,551 --> 01:06:52,179
I only signed up for this dumb shit
so I could have my dream job.

1095
01:06:52,263 --> 01:06:54,181
And instead, what do I have now, huh?

1096
01:06:55,349 --> 01:06:56,183
This.

1097
01:06:56,726 --> 01:07:00,438
One deflated, ugly boob. [scoffs]

1098
01:07:00,521 --> 01:07:03,232
[sobbing] My life is basically over.

1099
01:07:04,692 --> 01:07:08,988
I-- I mean... you're still super hot.

1100
01:07:09,071 --> 01:07:10,781
What kind of job do you want?

1101
01:07:12,825 --> 01:07:13,659
Journalist.

1102
01:07:17,079 --> 01:07:18,581
See, that's perfect.

1103
01:07:18,789 --> 01:07:22,001
Because you're super smart,
and you're hot,

1104
01:07:22,084 --> 01:07:24,045
-and really driven.
-Thank you.

1105
01:07:24,128 --> 01:07:26,881
I could be wrong,
but I don't think it would be hard for you

1106
01:07:26,964 --> 01:07:28,549
to have a cool life.

1107
01:07:29,216 --> 01:07:30,051
Really?

1108
01:07:30,551 --> 01:07:33,804
You think so? You think maybe
we could walk out of this whole thing?

1109
01:07:34,555 --> 01:07:38,059
Just call the police and just,
you know, forget this ever happened?

1110
01:07:38,142 --> 01:07:38,976
Yeah.

1111
01:07:39,477 --> 01:07:40,311
Exactly.

1112
01:07:40,394 --> 01:07:43,606
Do you think I give a fuck
what you're talking about?

1113
01:07:43,689 --> 01:07:45,149
[Allison screams]

1114
01:07:57,328 --> 01:07:58,704
[Cole] Knife. Where's the knife?

1115
01:08:01,499 --> 01:08:03,084
Oh! Dishwasher.

1116
01:08:05,711 --> 01:08:06,545
Mom.

1117
01:08:08,547 --> 01:08:11,050
Are you the one that put the knife
in the dishwasher?

1118
01:08:11,634 --> 01:08:12,468
I think so.

1119
01:08:12,635 --> 01:08:15,054
Can you not do that?
It goes in the butcher block.

1120
01:08:18,140 --> 01:08:19,141
Yoo-hoo!

1121
01:08:20,768 --> 01:08:21,811
Looking for this?

1122
01:08:22,686 --> 01:08:23,979
You still think I'm pretty?

1123
01:08:26,774 --> 01:08:27,817
[yells]

1124
01:08:32,071 --> 01:08:34,532
Oh, you think
I'm scared of a little fire, huh?

1125
01:08:34,615 --> 01:08:36,200
You are dying.

1126
01:08:36,534 --> 01:08:38,494
You, you are dying.

1127
01:08:38,786 --> 01:08:40,079
You ruined my life.

1128
01:08:41,080 --> 01:08:45,126
And now, I'm gonna ruin yours!

1129
01:08:45,209 --> 01:08:46,043
-[screams]
-[gunshot]

1130
01:08:51,674 --> 01:08:53,342
Holy shit.

1131
01:08:54,426 --> 01:08:55,261
[groans]

1132
01:08:56,262 --> 01:08:58,681
I found this in the cop car.
That was so graphic.

1133
01:08:58,764 --> 01:08:59,765
[pants]

1134
01:09:01,267 --> 01:09:02,726
She was so annoying.

1135
01:09:05,729 --> 01:09:06,814
I wanna throw up.

1136
01:09:06,897 --> 01:09:07,857
You and me both.

1137
01:09:09,275 --> 01:09:10,109
Where's Sonya?

1138
01:09:10,401 --> 01:09:12,486
Blown up. Crawlspace.
Where are the cops?

1139
01:09:12,570 --> 01:09:13,863
Ditched them with the car.

1140
01:09:15,406 --> 01:09:16,782
Now I gotta skip town again.

1141
01:09:17,283 --> 01:09:19,368
And that leaves you,
and what to do with you.

1142
01:09:19,451 --> 01:09:22,288
-Any suggestions?
-Are you gonna shoot me?

1143
01:09:22,830 --> 01:09:23,664
No.

1144
01:09:24,081 --> 01:09:27,835
No. I was just shooting around you,
'cause I thought you'd put your hands up.

1145
01:09:31,755 --> 01:09:33,048
I will burn your book!

1146
01:09:36,385 --> 01:09:37,219
Cole.

1147
01:09:39,471 --> 01:09:42,808
-Cole, listen to me.
-No.

1148
01:09:42,892 --> 01:09:45,144
-Cole, listen to me.
-No, Bee! You listen to me!

1149
01:09:46,228 --> 01:09:50,983
I've been hunted,
you've stolen my blood, killed people,

1150
01:09:51,066 --> 01:09:53,986
shot at me,
and just been general assholes all night.

1151
01:09:54,069 --> 01:09:56,947
So, I wanna know
what the hell's going on.

1152
01:09:57,364 --> 01:10:00,743
Cole, you're too young to understand,
okay? Just trust me.

1153
01:10:00,826 --> 01:10:01,952
Fuck you!

1154
01:10:02,036 --> 01:10:02,870
Cole.

1155
01:10:02,953 --> 01:10:04,705
No. You know what? You deserved that.

1156
01:10:04,788 --> 01:10:09,126
What, just because I'm 12 means I get
to be treated like total shit

1157
01:10:09,210 --> 01:10:11,879
by you and Jeremy and everyone else?

1158
01:10:11,962 --> 01:10:14,840
You know what?
You're Don Draper from <i>Mad Men.</i>

1159
01:10:15,090 --> 01:10:17,968
How he's all cool and handsome
and everybody loves him,

1160
01:10:18,052 --> 01:10:21,013
then he goes home and you find out
he has a wife the whole time.

1161
01:10:21,096 --> 01:10:24,642
-He's such a piece of shit!
-Did you just ruin <i>Mad Men</i> for me?

1162
01:10:25,476 --> 01:10:27,519
It's not even on anymore. You'll live.

1163
01:10:27,603 --> 01:10:28,729
Still.

1164
01:10:31,232 --> 01:10:34,151
-What happens when you leave here?
-What do you mean?

1165
01:10:34,235 --> 01:10:35,945
-I will burn this!
-Okay.

1166
01:10:36,153 --> 01:10:38,614
Cole... what do you want to know?

1167
01:10:41,242 --> 01:10:42,326
What's the blood for?

1168
01:10:42,660 --> 01:10:46,247
You mix the blood of the innocent
with the blood of someone sacrificed,

1169
01:10:46,914 --> 01:10:48,082
recite the verses,

1170
01:10:48,165 --> 01:10:49,833
while dripping it on the page.

1171
01:10:50,876 --> 01:10:53,087
And, basically, you get whatever you want.

1172
01:10:56,715 --> 01:11:00,803
I used to be so small... and so scared.

1173
01:11:03,430 --> 01:11:06,850
Now I'm strong... and I'm confident...

1174
01:11:08,602 --> 01:11:10,229
and that's all I ever wanted.

1175
01:11:13,732 --> 01:11:15,526
And, so, that's all I was to you.

1176
01:11:18,862 --> 01:11:21,573
You just used me to get what you wanted.

1177
01:11:22,700 --> 01:11:23,534
No.

1178
01:11:25,244 --> 01:11:26,787
No, Cole. I chose you.

1179
01:11:28,289 --> 01:11:30,291
I mean,
I could've shot you and not Allison,

1180
01:11:30,374 --> 01:11:31,917
but I didn't. I chose you.

1181
01:11:32,626 --> 01:11:33,919
'Cause you're the best.

1182
01:11:34,628 --> 01:11:36,255
We click, right? You're my guy.

1183
01:11:40,718 --> 01:11:42,553
I'm not the first kid, am I?

1184
01:11:49,143 --> 01:11:49,977
No.

1185
01:11:50,936 --> 01:11:53,981
And you'll leave here
and just find another faucet.

1186
01:11:54,523 --> 01:11:58,485
-You heard that?
-I heard everything. This is my house.

1187
01:12:00,321 --> 01:12:01,155
Okay.

1188
01:12:02,406 --> 01:12:03,282
Okay, yes.

1189
01:12:04,658 --> 01:12:07,703
And tonight sucked,
but we can start again.

1190
01:12:12,374 --> 01:12:13,500
So, you have a plan?

1191
01:12:14,126 --> 01:12:16,211
Yeah. We just say they attacked us.

1192
01:12:17,546 --> 01:12:18,380
I got him.

1193
01:12:19,340 --> 01:12:20,215
Whoo!

1194
01:12:32,269 --> 01:12:34,313
Plus, dude, we would have so much fun.

1195
01:12:35,647 --> 01:12:37,483
Just you and me against the whole world.

1196
01:12:38,025 --> 01:12:39,943
No one will ever hurt you ever again.

1197
01:12:40,027 --> 01:12:43,280
There'll be nothing left to be afraid of.
Isn't that what you wanted?

1198
01:12:47,743 --> 01:12:48,911
What do you say, Cole?

1199
01:12:54,208 --> 01:12:55,042
I guess...

1200
01:13:00,214 --> 01:13:01,799
I guess I have a plan, too.

1201
01:13:04,343 --> 01:13:06,011
No!

1202
01:13:06,428 --> 01:13:07,554
No!

1203
01:13:08,847 --> 01:13:09,723
No!

1204
01:13:11,934 --> 01:13:13,060
[Bee screaming]

1205
01:13:24,405 --> 01:13:26,198
[Queen's "We are the Champions" playing]
♪<i> I've paid my dues </i>♪

1206
01:13:26,865 --> 01:13:27,908
[boy] <i>Pussy!</i>

1207
01:13:28,492 --> 01:13:29,868
♪<i> Time after time </i>♪

1208
01:13:29,952 --> 01:13:32,413
-When you're ready, you're ready.
-A lot of things are scary.

1209
01:13:32,496 --> 01:13:34,206
♪<i> I've done my sentence </i>♪

1210
01:13:34,748 --> 01:13:35,958
You gotta figure out what you want...

1211
01:13:37,793 --> 01:13:40,963
-and then do what you can to get it.
-Keys...

1212
01:13:43,257 --> 01:13:45,968
-Cole!
-[engine revving]

1213
01:13:50,305 --> 01:13:52,558
Ten. Two.

1214
01:13:53,475 --> 01:13:57,896
<i>♪ And I need to go on and on</i>
<i>And on and on ♪</i>

1215
01:13:57,980 --> 01:14:03,569
♪<i> We are the champions</i>
<i>My friends </i>♪

1216
01:14:05,779 --> 01:14:10,451
♪ <i>And we'll keeping on fighting</i>
<i>Till the end ♪</i>

1217
01:14:10,993 --> 01:14:12,161
Yeah!

1218
01:14:13,579 --> 01:14:16,707
<i>♪ We are the champions ♪</i>

1219
01:14:16,790 --> 01:14:20,878
<i>♪ We are the champions ♪</i>

1220
01:14:20,961 --> 01:14:23,797
<i>♪ No time for losers ♪</i>

1221
01:14:23,881 --> 01:14:27,801
<i>♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪</i>

1222
01:14:28,427 --> 01:14:29,636
[Cole screaming]

1223
01:14:46,612 --> 01:14:47,863
[grunting and panting]

1224
01:15:19,186 --> 01:15:20,354
What up, Cee?

1225
01:15:22,898 --> 01:15:25,192
You drove a car into your house.

1226
01:15:28,153 --> 01:15:29,821
I really didn't see that coming.

1227
01:15:30,322 --> 01:15:31,448
[coughing]

1228
01:15:37,871 --> 01:15:39,081
You never told me...

1229
01:15:40,916 --> 01:15:42,918
your intergalactic dream team.

1230
01:15:43,877 --> 01:15:44,962
You didn't ask.

1231
01:15:45,587 --> 01:15:46,505
I should have.

1232
01:15:47,548 --> 01:15:49,591
I'm usually pretty good at that stuff.

1233
01:15:55,180 --> 01:15:56,848
Admiral Adama to lead.

1234
01:15:59,685 --> 01:16:02,312
Data for his intelligence and cool head.

1235
01:16:05,566 --> 01:16:06,608
Predator to fight.

1236
01:16:10,404 --> 01:16:11,280
Then me and you.

1237
01:16:13,782 --> 01:16:14,700
[chuckles]

1238
01:16:18,203 --> 01:16:20,581
You didn't say we could add ourselves.

1239
01:16:22,416 --> 01:16:24,793
It's science fiction. You can do anything.

1240
01:16:26,461 --> 01:16:29,464
Well... I guess that's true.

1241
01:16:33,302 --> 01:16:34,678
But don't you get it yet?

1242
01:16:39,891 --> 01:16:41,393
I am the big bad.

1243
01:16:45,397 --> 01:16:46,481
I loved you.

1244
01:16:54,698 --> 01:16:59,494
I don't care about your dumb book
or your stupid cult.

1245
01:17:00,871 --> 01:17:01,830
I'm an adult...

1246
01:17:02,706 --> 01:17:05,334
because when I realized
you were the big bad...

1247
01:17:06,418 --> 01:17:07,461
and you betrayed me

1248
01:17:07,544 --> 01:17:09,463
and were just gonna hurt other kids,

1249
01:17:10,756 --> 01:17:12,966
I drove a stolen car through you.

1250
01:17:14,635 --> 01:17:15,844
[sobbing]

1251
01:17:20,515 --> 01:17:22,184
That, I'll give you. [chuckles]

1252
01:17:25,771 --> 01:17:26,730
I'll see you, Cee.

1253
01:17:31,860 --> 01:17:32,694
Goodbye.

1254
01:17:34,321 --> 01:17:35,322
[chuckles]

1255
01:17:55,884 --> 01:17:58,136
[sirens wailing]

1256
01:18:14,486 --> 01:18:15,696
-[Melanie's dad] Martinez.
-Yeah?

1257
01:18:15,779 --> 01:18:17,406
Protect and serve, idiot.

1258
01:18:17,489 --> 01:18:19,324
-[Melanie] It's just a car.
-Protect my car.

1259
01:18:19,408 --> 01:18:21,493
Just a car?! Just a car?!

1260
01:18:22,619 --> 01:18:24,579
Do not-- Put your hand down right now.

1261
01:18:27,124 --> 01:18:30,127
-I thought you were gonna drive away.
-I couldn't leave you.

1262
01:18:31,628 --> 01:18:33,004
That was such a douche car.

1263
01:18:33,505 --> 01:18:35,507
Melanie, get over here.

1264
01:18:35,590 --> 01:18:37,676
Get back here. Now.

1265
01:18:41,138 --> 01:18:41,972
Bye.

1266
01:18:42,514 --> 01:18:43,974
[Melanie's dad] Oh, my God.

1267
01:18:44,057 --> 01:18:47,102
Did you just put your face on him?
Wanna go get tattoos now?

1268
01:18:47,352 --> 01:18:48,562
Yo. What happened?

1269
01:18:49,521 --> 01:18:51,231
Dude, Cole stole a car.

1270
01:18:51,314 --> 01:18:53,734
Rammed his house. Killed, like, 50 people.

1271
01:18:54,901 --> 01:18:57,154
Fifty people. [scoffs]

1272
01:18:57,904 --> 01:18:59,698
[Jeremy] Hey, let's get out of here.

1273
01:19:01,491 --> 01:19:03,034
Today, y'all. Let's go.

1274
01:19:10,000 --> 01:19:11,251
The hell?

1275
01:19:12,294 --> 01:19:14,004
[tires screeching]

1276
01:19:14,755 --> 01:19:15,714
Cindy.

1277
01:19:16,965 --> 01:19:19,009
-[Mom] Do you have my son? Please...
-[Dad] Cole.

1278
01:19:21,678 --> 01:19:23,680
[Mom] Honey. Honey. Oh, my God.

1279
01:19:25,390 --> 01:19:26,641
Are you okay? Are you...?

1280
01:19:26,892 --> 01:19:28,727
-I'm okay.
-[Dad] Are you all right?

1281
01:19:28,810 --> 01:19:30,812
-Oh, my God. What happened?
-Is that blood?

1282
01:19:30,896 --> 01:19:33,273
Hey. What happened?

1283
01:19:39,696 --> 01:19:41,615
I don't need a babysitter anymore.

1284
01:19:47,037 --> 01:19:51,291
<i>♪ When my best friend said</i>
<i>She had lost her man ♪</i>

1285
01:19:51,374 --> 01:19:54,503
<i>♪ To her babysitter</i>
<i>I thought she was lying ♪</i>

1286
01:19:55,045 --> 01:19:59,216
<i>♪ I said, "No 16-year-old schoolgirl ♪</i>

1287
01:19:59,299 --> 01:20:02,719
<i>♪ Would ever take a man of mine" ♪</i>

1288
01:20:04,346 --> 01:20:08,183
<i>♪ Staying home</i>
<i>With our baby all the time ♪</i>

1289
01:20:08,266 --> 01:20:11,686
<i>♪ It kept me kind of brokenhearted ♪</i>

1290
01:20:11,812 --> 01:20:15,482
<i>♪ So I went</i>
<i>And hired myself a babysitter ♪</i>

1291
01:20:16,608 --> 01:20:19,945
<i>♪ And that's when my trouble all started ♪</i>

1292
01:20:20,695 --> 01:20:24,199
<i>♪ This 16-year-old chick walked in ♪</i>

1293
01:20:24,783 --> 01:20:27,702
<i>♪ With a skirt up to her waist ♪</i>

1294
01:20:28,453 --> 01:20:32,624
<i>♪ She had a truckload of you-know-what ♪</i>

1295
01:20:33,124 --> 01:20:35,710
<i>♪ And all of it in place ♪</i>

1296
01:20:36,837 --> 01:20:39,714
<i>♪ I should have been aware, mm-hmm ♪</i>

1297
01:20:39,798 --> 01:20:42,717
<i>♪ Ooh-ooh, of the babysitter ♪</i>

1298
01:20:43,343 --> 01:20:47,931
<i>♪ Oh, yeah, yeah</i>
<i>I should've known from the jump, yeah ♪</i>

1299
01:20:48,807 --> 01:20:51,726
<i>♪ She was a man-getter, mm-hmm ♪</i>

1300
01:20:52,811 --> 01:20:56,022
<i>♪ I should've been aware, uh-huh ♪</i>

1301
01:20:57,274 --> 01:21:01,319
<i>♪ Of the babysitter ♪ </i>[shouts]

1302
01:21:01,403 --> 01:21:04,114
<i>♪ Should've the known from the jump</i>
<i>Yeah ♪</i>

1303
01:21:05,323 --> 01:21:08,994
<i>♪ She was a man-getter</i>
<i>Yeah, she was ♪</i>

1304
01:21:20,380 --> 01:21:24,175
[indistinct radio chatter]