1 00:00:06,005 --> 00:00:10,377 ♪ HERE WITH MY FEAR AT THE DOOR ♪ 2 00:00:10,377 --> 00:00:16,549 ♪ AND LOOKING AT THAT NEW GUY ♪ ♪ HERE WE ARE ♪ 3 00:00:16,549 --> 00:00:21,287 ♪ IT'S "THE LATE LATE SHOW" ♪ Reggie: LADIES AND 4 00:00:21,287 --> 00:00:26,659 GENTLEMEN, ALL THE WAY FROM INSIDE THE AREA 563EC. 5 00:00:26,659 --> 00:00:31,965 GIVE IT UP FOR YOUR HOST, THE ONE, THE ONLY... 6 00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:35,502 JAMES CORDEN! 7 00:00:35,502 --> 00:00:39,973 James: HOW ARE YOU? 8 00:00:39,973 --> 00:00:40,974 THANK YOU VERY, VERY MUCH. 9 00:00:40,974 --> 00:00:41,741 I APPRECIATE IT. 10 00:00:41,741 --> 00:00:48,081 THANK YOU VERY MUCH, CHEERS, GUYS. 11 00:00:48,081 --> 00:00:52,152 WELCOME TO "THE LATE LATE SHOW," THANKS FOR STOPPING BY. 12 00:00:52,152 --> 00:00:55,422 GLAD YOU ARE HERE, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 13 00:00:55,422 --> 00:00:58,391 LET'S SEE WHO OUR GUESTS ARE ON THE SHOW TONIGHT. 14 00:00:58,391 --> 00:01:03,363 AND WHAT A TREAT WE HAVE IN STORE, WE HAVE TWO 15 00:01:03,363 --> 00:01:05,331 OSCAR-NOMINATED STARS OF THE INCREDIBLE FILM "THE BANSHEES 16 00:01:05,331 --> 00:01:09,903 OF INISHERIN," WHAT AN HONOR TO WELCOME THE DASHING, THE 17 00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:12,205 GLORIOUS COLIN FARRELL AND BRENDAN GLEESON ARE HERE 18 00:01:12,205 --> 00:01:13,406 TONIGHT! 19 00:01:13,406 --> 00:01:14,374 LOOK AT THESE TWO. 20 00:01:14,374 --> 00:01:20,213 OH, MY GOD! 21 00:01:20,213 --> 00:01:21,948 BRENDAN GLEESON, COLIN FARRELL, HOW LUCKY ARE WE? 22 00:01:21,948 --> 00:01:26,352 THIS IS A WONDERFUL MOMENT IN YOUR LIFE. 23 00:01:26,352 --> 00:01:29,956 SPEAK TO A CROWNING ACHIEVEMENT OF SOME VERY DODGY CAREERS. 24 00:01:29,956 --> 00:01:32,392 James: YOU ARE ON THIS OSCAR PARADE AND DOING ALL OF 25 00:01:32,392 --> 00:01:34,994 THE TALK SHOWS AND ALL OF THE THINGS YOU MUST BE TIRED, IS 26 00:01:34,994 --> 00:01:38,398 THERE ANYTHING I CAN GET YOU AT ALL? 27 00:01:38,398 --> 00:01:41,100 Colin: CAFFEINE AND A SYRINGE. 28 00:01:41,100 --> 00:01:43,636 James: I'M NOT GOING TO ASK WHICH IS FOR WHO, BUT WE ARE SO 29 00:01:43,636 --> 00:01:48,141 HAPPY YOU ARE HERE! 30 00:01:48,141 --> 00:01:50,543 COLIN FARRELL AND BRENDAN GLEESON COME EVERYBODY. 31 00:01:50,543 --> 00:01:52,412 AND THIS IS BRILLIANT STAND-UP COMEDIAN. 32 00:01:52,412 --> 00:01:57,217 WE ARE SO PROUD HE HAS CHOSEN THIS SHOW TO MAKE HIS TELEVISION 33 00:01:57,217 --> 00:01:58,151 DEBUT! 34 00:01:58,151 --> 00:01:59,986 THE BRILLIANT CHRIS MARTIN IS HERE TONIGHT! 35 00:01:59,986 --> 00:02:02,188 HEY, CHRIS, HOW ARE YOU? 36 00:02:02,188 --> 00:02:04,657 Chris: HEY, MATE, HOW ARE YOU? 37 00:02:04,657 --> 00:02:07,594 James: HOW ARE YOU DOING? 38 00:02:07,594 --> 00:02:08,161 Chris: I'M EXCITED. 39 00:02:08,161 --> 00:02:11,931 IT IS TO BE ON WHAT YOU? 40 00:02:11,931 --> 00:02:17,203 OH, YES, THAT IS MY WIFE, THAT'S MY MANAGER, AND THAT'S 41 00:02:17,203 --> 00:02:19,339 DIEGO. 42 00:02:19,339 --> 00:02:23,543 James: BECAUSE IT FEELS LIKE WE ARE PLAYING A "WHERE'S 43 00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:26,746 WALDO" SCENARIO, IS THAT? 44 00:02:26,746 --> 00:02:30,583 Chris: I TOLD HIM TO DRESS UP, AND THAT'S WHAT HE CAME AS. 45 00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:33,953 James: WHAT WE ARE SO EXCITED, CHRIS MARTIN, ARE YOU 46 00:02:33,953 --> 00:02:36,523 James: ALL RIGHT, I'M JAMES CORDEN, AND THIS IS "THE 47 00:02:36,523 --> 00:02:40,827 LATE LATE SHOW," ROLL THE TITLE! 48 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:45,031 ♪ "THE LATE LATE SHOW," OH, OH, "THE LATE LATE SHOW," WOO! ♪ 49 00:02:45,031 --> 00:02:48,635 ♪ "THE LATE LATE SHOW," OH, OH, "THE LATE LATE SHOW" OH-OH! ♪ 50 00:02:48,635 --> 00:03:00,847 ♪ IT'S "THE LATE, LATE SHOW" ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 51 00:03:00,847 --> 00:03:06,886 SPIN, SPIN, SPIN, SPIN, SPIN! 52 00:03:06,886 --> 00:03:09,489 SPIN, SPIN, SPIN, SPIN! 53 00:03:09,489 --> 00:03:12,525 James: GIVE ME A PUSH, GIVE ME A PUSH? 54 00:03:12,525 --> 00:03:17,463 GIVE ME A PUSH, GIVE ME A REAL SPIN, JUST LET IT GO. 55 00:03:17,463 --> 00:03:20,733 LET IT GO, GIVE ME ONE. 56 00:03:20,733 --> 00:03:33,713 ♪ ♪ [APPLAUSE] 57 00:03:33,713 --> 00:03:35,214 James: IT IS THAT TIME. 58 00:03:35,214 --> 00:03:45,959 IT'S TIME FOR "THE NEWS." 59 00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:49,529 WOW, OKAY. 60 00:03:49,529 --> 00:03:53,866 TOMORROW, PRESIDENT BIDEN WILL WELCOME GERMAN CHANCELLOR OLAF 61 00:03:53,866 --> 00:03:57,136 SCHOLZ TO THE WHITE HOUSE. 62 00:03:57,136 --> 00:03:59,806 AND YOU KNOW BIDEN IS GOING TO KICK IT OFF BY TELLING HIM, "I 63 00:03:59,806 --> 00:04:03,476 GOTTA TELL YOU, OLAF, MY GRANDKIDS LOVED YOU AS THAT 64 00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:05,244 TALKING SNOWMAN FELLA. 65 00:04:05,244 --> 00:04:10,350 REAL TOP-NOTCH WORK." 66 00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:12,619 ♪ IN SUMMER ♪ BIDEN AND THE GERMAN CHANCELLOR 67 00:04:12,619 --> 00:04:15,054 WILL DISCUSS EFFORTS TO SUPPORT UKRAINE, TRANSATLANTIC SECURITY, 68 00:04:15,054 --> 00:04:21,761 AND OF COURSE. 69 00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:23,463 THE TOP OF JOE BIDEN'S AGENDA... 70 00:04:23,463 --> 00:04:25,131 THE UNDERGROUND CLUBBING SCENE IN BERLIN. 71 00:04:25,131 --> 00:04:26,399 MORE IMPORTANTLY, BIDEN CAN USE THE MEETING TO FINALLY PITCH THE 72 00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:30,536 GERMAN CHANCELLOR ON HIS IDEA FOR "MARCH-TOBERFEST." 73 00:04:30,536 --> 00:04:34,173 [LAUGHTER] DO YOU THINK? 74 00:04:34,173 --> 00:04:39,846 Ian: YES, THE TOBER IS FROM OCTOBER. 75 00:04:39,846 --> 00:04:43,016 James: I'M NOT SAYING IT IS MY IDEA. 76 00:04:43,016 --> 00:04:46,219 I AM NEARLY A VESSEL. 77 00:04:46,219 --> 00:04:49,322 SHARING DIRECT NEWS FROM THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. 78 00:04:49,322 --> 00:04:50,256 OKAY? 79 00:04:50,256 --> 00:04:54,861 I SAID TO HIM, I SAID JOE-- I CALL HIM JOE. 80 00:04:54,861 --> 00:04:57,597 I SAID, BUDDY, JUST CALL IT TO MARCH FAST. 81 00:04:57,597 --> 00:04:59,999 AND HE SAID I THINK IT'S TOO CLOSE, HE WAS WORRIED ABOUT LIKE 82 00:04:59,999 --> 00:05:02,402 MARCH MADNESS AND ALL OF THAT STUFF. 83 00:05:02,402 --> 00:05:12,478 AND HE SAID I WANTED IT TO BE "MARCH-TOBERFEST." 84 00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:15,715 Ian: HE IS THE LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD AND I WILL FOLLOW 85 00:05:15,715 --> 00:05:19,686 HIM GLADLY. 86 00:05:19,686 --> 00:05:21,354 James: AND HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THIS? 87 00:05:21,354 --> 00:05:22,455 THE REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE IS TRYING TO CORNER 88 00:05:22,455 --> 00:05:23,589 DONALD TRUMP WITH A DEBATE PLEDGE. 89 00:05:23,589 --> 00:05:26,526 IT'S TRUE, IN ORDER TO PARTICIPATE IN REPUBLICAN 90 00:05:26,526 --> 00:05:28,161 DEBATES, EACH CANDIDATE WILL NEED TO SIGN A PLEDGE TO SUPPORT 91 00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:32,498 WHOEVER WINS THE NOMINATION. 92 00:05:32,498 --> 00:05:34,067 YEAH, THAT WILL DO IT. 93 00:05:34,067 --> 00:05:35,868 GETTING TRUMP TO SIGN A PLEDGE IS A BRILLIANT PLAN. 94 00:05:35,868 --> 00:05:37,370 BECAUSE IF THERE'S ONE THING I KNOW, DONALD TRUMP WOULD NEVER 95 00:05:37,370 --> 00:05:41,140 SAY ONE THING AND THEN DO ANOTHER. 96 00:05:41,140 --> 00:05:42,341 I MEAN, NOTHING'S HAPPENED TO HIM AFTER ATTEMPTING TO 97 00:05:42,341 --> 00:05:48,081 OVERTHROW AN ELECTION, BUT SURE, THIS IS WHAT'LL GET HIM. 98 00:05:48,081 --> 00:05:55,188 A "DEBATE PLEDGE." 99 00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:56,322 [LAUGHTER] BUT I TOTALLY DISAGREE WITH THE 100 00:05:56,322 --> 00:05:57,724 RNC HERE. 101 00:05:57,724 --> 00:06:00,426 THEY HAVE TO LET DONALD TRUMP ON THAT DEBATE STAGE. 102 00:06:00,426 --> 00:06:08,835 IF FOR NO OTHER REASON THAN TO HEAR ALL THOSE NICKNAMES. 103 00:06:08,835 --> 00:06:12,105 I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HE IS COOKING UP. 104 00:06:12,105 --> 00:06:13,206 YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? 105 00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:19,011 TRICKY NIKKI HALEY, PRAWN DESANTIS, AND HIDIN' BIDEN. 106 00:06:19,011 --> 00:06:20,813 WHAT IS THE ONE I HEARD TODAY? 107 00:06:20,813 --> 00:06:24,417 THE SAUSAGE? 108 00:06:24,417 --> 00:06:26,119 Ian: MEATBALL RON? 109 00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:29,956 James: YES, I MEAN, I AM SORRY, I LIKE THEM AS MUCH AS 110 00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:37,430 THE NEXT TO GAIA, "MEATBALL RON" IS SUCH AN EXTRAORDINARILY GOOD 111 00:06:37,430 --> 00:06:37,697 NICKNAME. 112 00:06:37,697 --> 00:06:40,733 IT IS. 113 00:06:40,733 --> 00:06:43,603 Ian: IT IS AMAZING. 114 00:06:43,603 --> 00:06:44,170 MEATBALL RON. 115 00:06:44,170 --> 00:06:46,472 James: MEATBALL RON! 116 00:06:46,472 --> 00:06:51,711 Ian: YOU KNOW WHAT IS BETTER THEN MEATBALL RON FOR AN 117 00:06:51,711 --> 00:06:52,311 ENEMY? 118 00:06:52,311 --> 00:06:54,180 MEATBALL RON FOR A FRIEND. 119 00:06:54,180 --> 00:06:56,916 IF I WAS LIKE MEATBALL RON, GET OVER HERE! 120 00:06:56,916 --> 00:07:00,720 James: AND THEN YOU ARE LIKE, DON'T LOOK NOW, MEATBALL 121 00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:03,623 RON HAS JUST WALKED IN. 122 00:07:03,623 --> 00:07:07,226 I THINK IT IS SO-- I JUST WANT TO HEAR WHAT HE HAS 123 00:07:07,226 --> 00:07:09,962 GOT. 124 00:07:09,962 --> 00:07:14,433 Ian: IT IS ACTUALLY A GREAT NICKNAME FOR A LOVER AS WELL. 125 00:07:14,433 --> 00:07:17,403 James: IS IT? 126 00:07:17,403 --> 00:07:17,970 Ian: YEAH. 127 00:07:17,970 --> 00:07:23,476 James: IN WHAT SENSE? 128 00:07:23,476 --> 00:07:26,145 Ian: HAVE I INTRODUCED YOU TO MY HUSBAND... 129 00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:30,149 ♪ ♪ MEATBALL RON LESTER MARK 130 00:07:30,149 --> 00:07:34,854 James: IT JUST SOUNDS LIKE YOUR HUSBAND IS CALLED A BALL 131 00:07:34,854 --> 00:07:36,055 RON. 132 00:07:36,055 --> 00:07:40,226 MEET BALL RON. 133 00:07:40,226 --> 00:07:42,662 Ian: BALL RON IS A DIFFERENT GUY. 134 00:07:42,662 --> 00:07:45,932 James: MOVING ON. 135 00:07:45,932 --> 00:07:47,133 FORD MOTOR COMPANY HAS FILED FOR A PATENT THAT 136 00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:54,941 WOULD ALLOW SELF-DRIVING TRUCKS TO "REPOSSESS" THEMSELVES IF 137 00:07:54,941 --> 00:07:56,709 PAYMENTS ARE MISSED. 138 00:07:56,709 --> 00:08:00,379 OR, IF IT'S NOT CONSIDERED WORTH REPOSSESSING, THE VEHICLE COULD 139 00:08:00,379 --> 00:08:16,529 ACTUALLY DRIVE ITSELF TO A JUNKYARD. 140 00:08:16,529 --> 00:08:20,900 THAT IS SOME MESSED UP "END OF A PIXAR" MOVIE TYPE [BLEEP]. 141 00:08:20,900 --> 00:08:22,468 WHEN THEY FIRST TOLD US ABOUT SELF-DRIVING CARS IT WAS LIKE 142 00:08:22,468 --> 00:08:23,603 "YOU'LL BE ABLE TO READ THE NEWSPAPER ON YOUR DRIVE INTO 143 00:08:23,603 --> 00:08:25,004 WORK!" AND NOW THEY'RE JUST CAUSING CAR 144 00:08:25,004 --> 00:08:32,912 CRASHES AND GHOSTING YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. 145 00:08:32,912 --> 00:08:37,283 [LAUGHTER] HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THIS, REG? 146 00:08:37,283 --> 00:08:41,487 YOU ARE ONE OF THE FIRST PEOPLE, I MEAN, YOU ALREADY, YOUR CAR 147 00:08:41,487 --> 00:08:45,725 ALREADY DOES DRIVE YOU AROUND, RIGHT? 148 00:08:45,725 --> 00:08:49,896 YOU JUST GO-- AND SIT THERE, AND I WOULD FEEL VERY 149 00:08:49,896 --> 00:08:50,563 UNCOMFORTABLE. 150 00:08:50,563 --> 00:08:51,430 HE WOULD BE LIKE THIS IS FINE. 151 00:08:51,430 --> 00:08:54,934 WHAT'S THE PROBLEM? 152 00:08:54,934 --> 00:08:57,570 Reggie: I THINK IT IS GREAT, INSTEAD OF WAKING UP IN 153 00:08:57,570 --> 00:08:58,938 THE MORNING IT'S LIKE NO, I JUST DROVE AWAY. 154 00:08:58,938 --> 00:09:03,075 James: KIDS, WE ARE GOING TO BE LATE! 155 00:09:03,075 --> 00:09:04,543 [LAUGHTER] I MEAN IMAGINE HOW MANY CALLS 156 00:09:04,543 --> 00:09:05,878 THE POLICE ARE GOING TO GET. 157 00:09:05,878 --> 00:09:07,713 MY CAR HAS BEEN STOLEN... 158 00:09:07,713 --> 00:09:10,883 IT HASN'T. 159 00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:13,019 AND WE WANTED TO TELL YOU ABOUT THIS. 160 00:09:13,019 --> 00:09:15,888 ACCORDING TO A NEW POLL, THE MOST STRESSFUL TIME OF THE 161 00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:20,826 DAY-- WHAT DO YOU THINK? 162 00:09:20,826 --> 00:09:21,494 TIME OF THE DAY? 163 00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:23,262 RIGHT NOW. 164 00:09:23,262 --> 00:09:25,364 James: DAVE? 165 00:09:25,364 --> 00:09:30,036 WHAT IS THE MOST STRESSFUL TIME CUSTOMER >> 8:30 A.M. 166 00:09:30,036 --> 00:09:32,104 James: YOU ARE GOING 8:30. 167 00:09:32,104 --> 00:09:36,208 WHAT IS THE MOST STRESSFUL TIME OF THE DAY FOR LAUREN GREENBERG? 168 00:09:36,208 --> 00:09:40,112 BEDTIME. 169 00:09:40,112 --> 00:09:42,949 James: ANY TIME THAT YOU GET TO BE ALONE WITH YOUR 170 00:09:42,949 --> 00:09:46,819 THOUGHTS. 171 00:09:46,819 --> 00:09:51,123 WINNIE, WHAT IS THE MOST STRESSFUL TIME FOR YOU? 172 00:09:51,123 --> 00:09:52,491 THE MINUTE I WAKE UP. 173 00:09:52,491 --> 00:09:54,527 James: SOME OF YOU ARE IN THE RIGHT ZONE. 174 00:09:54,527 --> 00:09:56,996 PEOPLE SAY THE MOST STRESSFUL TIME OF DAY IS 7:23 A.M. 175 00:09:56,996 --> 00:10:04,904 ESPECIALLY IF YOU WERE MEANT TO BE AT WORK AT 7:00. 176 00:10:04,904 --> 00:10:08,941 ACCORDING TO THE SAME POLL, THE FIRST CASE OF "DRAMA" TYPICALLY 177 00:10:08,941 --> 00:10:13,913 HAPPENS BY 8:18 A.M. 178 00:10:13,913 --> 00:10:18,951 THIS IS ONLY FOR PEOPLE WITHOUT KIDS. 179 00:10:18,951 --> 00:10:26,425 BY 8:18 I HAVE ALREADY SAVED MY HOUSE FROM BURNING DOWN TWICE. 180 00:10:26,425 --> 00:10:27,593 RESPONDENTS ALSO SAID THEY EXPERIENCE AN AVERAGE OF THREE 181 00:10:27,593 --> 00:10:28,761 DRAMAS A DAY. 182 00:10:28,761 --> 00:10:29,962 I LIKE TO GET ALL THREE OF MY DRAMAS OUT OF THE WAY EARLY. 183 00:10:29,962 --> 00:10:36,035 I WALK IN IN THE MORNING AND RANDOMLY OPEN SOMEONE'S OFFICE. 184 00:10:36,035 --> 00:10:41,307 AND I AM LIKE, "YOU ARE SLEEPING WITH MY FATHER? 185 00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:50,316 HOW DARE YOU!" REG COME I FEEL LIKE HER DAYS 186 00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:54,020 ARE FREE OF DRAMA, YOU'RE PRETTY ZEN. 187 00:10:54,020 --> 00:10:55,888 Reggie: THERE RANDOM THINGS, IT'S MOSTLY STRESSFUL 188 00:10:55,888 --> 00:10:59,058 BECAUSE IT WILL BE LIKE YOU HAVE TO GO OVER HERE, AND THEN YOU 189 00:10:59,058 --> 00:10:59,825 HAVE TO GO OVER THERE. 190 00:10:59,825 --> 00:11:02,061 YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? 191 00:11:02,061 --> 00:11:04,597 James: YEAH. 192 00:11:04,597 --> 00:11:09,635 [LAUGHTER] BOIL IT DOWN. 193 00:11:09,635 --> 00:11:10,836 HE IS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. 194 00:11:10,836 --> 00:11:13,239 THAT IS THE PROBLEM WITH ALL OF THIS. 195 00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:17,743 IT IS JUST ONE [BLEEP] THING AFTER ANOTHER. 196 00:11:17,743 --> 00:11:19,912 HAVE YOU SEEN THIS? 197 00:11:19,912 --> 00:11:22,214 A FASHION RETAILER HAS INTRODUCED AN ARTICLE OF 198 00:11:22,214 --> 00:11:26,852 CLOTHING THEY'RE CALLING "LOW RISE BOOTY DENIM SHORTS" AND, 199 00:11:26,852 --> 00:11:28,587 THEY'RE BASICALLY A JEAN THONG. 200 00:11:28,587 --> 00:11:33,559 HERE THEY ARE HERE. 201 00:11:33,559 --> 00:11:38,964 LOOK AT THAT. 202 00:11:38,964 --> 00:11:40,399 YOU KNOW, FOR CASUAL FRIDAYS. 203 00:11:40,399 --> 00:11:41,333 I LIKE IT, I LIKE THE LOOK. 204 00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:43,469 THAT'S HOW YOU WANT TO HIT THE CLUB. 205 00:11:43,469 --> 00:11:48,107 JEANS THONG, TEAM STRONG. 206 00:11:48,107 --> 00:11:50,476 THAT'S WHAT I SAY. 207 00:11:50,476 --> 00:11:52,111 I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE ASKING YOURSELF RIGHT NOW: "SURE THEY 208 00:11:52,111 --> 00:11:58,751 LOOK GREAT, JAMES, BUT ARE THEY COMFORTABLE?" 209 00:11:58,751 --> 00:12:01,353 AND THE ANSWER IS... 210 00:12:01,353 --> 00:12:02,121 KIND OF. 211 00:12:02,121 --> 00:12:04,223 [LAUGHTER] [APPLAUSE] 212 00:12:04,223 --> 00:12:11,430 AND FINALLY, YOU CAN NOW RUN TO THE RANCH FROM SEASON 3 OF 213 00:12:11,430 --> 00:12:14,233 "YELLOWSTONE" TO YOUR FAVORITE SEASON THROUGH AN ONLINE 214 00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:15,434 VACATION RENTAL SITE. 215 00:12:15,434 --> 00:12:17,369 THE HOME SLEEPS 22 PEOPLE AND IS AVAILABLE FOR ALMOST $3000 A 216 00:12:17,369 --> 00:12:18,137 NIGHT. 217 00:12:18,137 --> 00:12:21,073 HERE IT IS HERE. 218 00:12:21,073 --> 00:12:24,810 LOOK AT THAT. 219 00:12:24,810 --> 00:12:26,712 YOU DO HAVE TO PROVIDE YOUR OWN FAMILY DRAMA. 220 00:12:26,712 --> 00:12:32,551 YOU CAN ALSO RENT THE PLACE FROM "WHITE LOTUS," BUT THAT'S JUST A 221 00:12:32,551 --> 00:12:33,486 HOTEL SO. 222 00:12:33,486 --> 00:12:36,422 NOT REALLY A BIG DEAL. 223 00:12:36,422 --> 00:12:40,359 THAT'S A SHAME. 224 00:12:40,359 --> 00:12:43,095 I THOUGHT THAT WOULD GET MORE. 225 00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:47,600 [LAUGHTER] IT COSTS ALMOST $3,000 A NIGHT. 226 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:52,972 NO THANK YOU, BUT I AM INTERESTED IN SPENDING A NIGHT 227 00:12:52,972 --> 00:12:55,641 IN SYLVESTER STALLONE'S "TULSA KING "ARMS. 228 00:12:55,641 --> 00:12:56,408 AND THAT'S "THE NEWS!" WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH 229 00:12:56,408 --> 00:12:58,043 COLIN FARRELL AND BRENDAN GLEESON! 230 00:13:16,996 --> 00:13:19,932 James: WITH MY GUESTS TONIGHT... 231 00:13:19,932 --> 00:13:21,300 HE PLAYS COLM IN "THE BANSHEES OF INISHERIN" 232 00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:25,771 BRENDAN GLEESON! 233 00:13:25,771 --> 00:13:30,042 Reggie: ♪ IT'S BRENDAN GLEESON ♪ 234 00:13:30,042 --> 00:13:33,946 James: THANK YOU, HAVE A SEAT. 235 00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:34,947 HE PLAYS PADRAIC IN "THE BANSHEES OF INISHERIN" 236 00:13:34,947 --> 00:13:40,419 COLIN FARRELL! 237 00:13:40,419 --> 00:13:42,288 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Reggie: ♪ IT'S 238 00:13:42,288 --> 00:13:53,999 COLIN FARRELL ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 239 00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:59,371 James: GENTLEMEN, GENTLEMEN, I AM SO HAPPY YOU ARE 240 00:13:59,371 --> 00:14:05,678 HERE, AND I AM SO AWARE OF HOW MANY THINGS AND PEOPLE AND 241 00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:09,582 PLACES ARE PULLING ON YOUR TIME AT THIS MOMENT IN THEIR LIVES, 242 00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:15,054 AND THE FACT THAT YOU BOTH HAVE FOUND THE TIME TO BE HERE-- 243 00:14:15,054 --> 00:14:17,590 Colin: JUST START ASKING QUESTIONS, JAMES. 244 00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:24,263 James: HERE WE ARE, JUST THE THREE OF US, TWO OSCAR 245 00:14:24,263 --> 00:14:26,899 NOMINEES, AND RICHLY, RICHLY DESERVED! 246 00:14:26,899 --> 00:14:30,502 AND COLIN, WHERE WERE YOU WHEN YOU HEARD THAT YOU WERE 247 00:14:30,502 --> 00:14:31,737 NOMINATED? 248 00:14:31,737 --> 00:14:34,673 Colin: I WAS ON MY COUCH IN MY LIVING ROOM WITH MY YOUNGEST 249 00:14:34,673 --> 00:14:38,711 SON, MY TWO SISTERS, A BROTHER-IN-LAW, AND CARRY FROM 250 00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:41,513 THE FILM WAS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD AND SHE TEXTED ME, WHAT ARE YOU 251 00:14:41,513 --> 00:14:42,581 GOING TO DO? 252 00:14:42,581 --> 00:14:45,684 ARE YOU GOING TO BED AND HOPEFULLY RECEIVE A CALL OR 253 00:14:45,684 --> 00:14:47,720 WATCH IT LIVE? 254 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,422 AND I SAID I HAVE A FEW PEOPLE COMING BY, SO 5:00 IN THE 255 00:14:50,422 --> 00:14:55,327 MORNING, SHE WAS IN HER PAJAMAS, AND SHE CAME, THE CATTLE WENT O 256 00:14:55,327 --> 00:14:55,761 ON. 257 00:14:55,761 --> 00:15:00,833 AND THAT WAS IT. 258 00:15:00,833 --> 00:15:04,837 James: DID YOU NOT FEEL A SENSE OF PRESSURE INVITING 259 00:15:04,837 --> 00:15:08,073 PEOPLE AROUND AT SUCH A MOMENT? 260 00:15:08,073 --> 00:15:10,476 Colin: I HAD ALREADY PAID FOR THE NOMINATION. 261 00:15:10,476 --> 00:15:14,847 THE THING WAS, MY SISTER NEARLY GOT A DRUM ROLL. 262 00:15:14,847 --> 00:15:16,882 I THOUGHT OF IT. 263 00:15:16,882 --> 00:15:22,321 MY SISTER HAD SAID ABOUT TWO MONTHS AGO, WILL WE ALL COME 264 00:15:22,321 --> 00:15:23,856 OVER WHEN NOTHING HAPPENS? 265 00:15:23,856 --> 00:15:26,425 THERE BEEN SOME CONVERSATION FOR ALL OF US IN THE FILM. 266 00:15:26,425 --> 00:15:28,260 AND I SAID THAT'S RIDICULOUS. 267 00:15:28,260 --> 00:15:30,429 TALK ABOUT TEMPTING FATE IN THE WORST POSSIBLE WAY. 268 00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:35,267 SO I GOT A BIT COCKY AFTER THAT AND THOUGHT THAT IT'S NEVER A 269 00:15:35,267 --> 00:15:36,502 CERTAINTY. 270 00:15:36,502 --> 00:15:39,371 BUT THEY ARE SAYING INSTEAD OF A POSSIBILITY IT HAS ENTERED THE 271 00:15:39,371 --> 00:15:40,306 REALM OF PROBABILITY. 272 00:15:40,306 --> 00:15:42,708 BUT THEN YOU STILL [BLEEP] YOURSELF. 273 00:15:42,708 --> 00:15:56,989 ON THE COUCH AND ONCE IT STARTED HAPPENING, AND KERRY'S ACTRESS 274 00:15:56,989 --> 00:16:00,426 WAS FIRST, AND IT WILL ALL BE OVERLOOKED IN THREE WEEKS LIKE 275 00:16:00,426 --> 00:16:01,593 THAT. 276 00:16:01,593 --> 00:16:04,263 James: WHAT ABOUT YOU, BRENDAN, WHERE WERE YOU WHEN YOU 277 00:16:04,263 --> 00:16:05,264 HEARD THE NEWS? 278 00:16:05,264 --> 00:16:07,232 Brendan: I WAS ASLEEP, BECAUSE I WAS WORKING. 279 00:16:07,232 --> 00:16:20,446 I WAS WORKING ON-- AND I HAD TO GET SOME SLEEP, AND 280 00:16:20,446 --> 00:16:26,652 ANY WHEN THE PHONE CALL CAME, THAT'S NOT MY ALARM, I WOULD NOT 281 00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:31,690 BE GETTING IT SO EARLY IF IT WAS NOT GOOD NEWS. 282 00:16:31,690 --> 00:16:33,926 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] James: IT HAS BEEN THE MOST 283 00:16:33,926 --> 00:16:42,368 INCREDIBLE RUN, AND YOU SHARED A KISS AND THEN SHARED COVID 284 00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:46,205 OBVIOUSLY, TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS CASE. 285 00:16:46,205 --> 00:16:49,241 I MEAN IT IS ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL, IS THIS HOW YOU 286 00:16:49,241 --> 00:16:50,476 CONGRATULATE EACH OTHER ALWAYS? 287 00:16:50,476 --> 00:16:55,280 Colin: THAT'S HOW WE START EVERY MORNING AT WORK. 288 00:16:55,280 --> 00:16:58,016 TWO HOUSE OF A FRACTURED FRIENDSHIP, WE BETTER START WITH 289 00:16:58,016 --> 00:17:01,420 A GOODLY BLOCK EVERY MORNING. 290 00:17:01,420 --> 00:17:03,055 Brendan: SO THAT WAS. 291 00:17:03,055 --> 00:17:06,525 COLIN WON THE GOLDEN GLOBE AND IT WAS ANNOUNCED, AND HE GOT UP, 292 00:17:06,525 --> 00:17:11,063 AND I WENT TO GIVE THEM A BIG BRUISE ON YOUR RIGHT CHEEK AT 293 00:17:11,063 --> 00:17:13,799 WHICH STAGE HE WAS GIVING IT TO ME ON MY LEFT CHEEK, AND WE MET 294 00:17:13,799 --> 00:17:19,104 IN THE MIDDLE, AND I COULD AT LEAST SIT DOWN AND SAY THAT WAS 295 00:17:19,104 --> 00:17:28,147 A BIT ODD, BUT HE WOULD GO UP AND EXCEPT HIS GOLDEN GLOBE. 296 00:17:28,147 --> 00:17:29,581 SO-- Colin: AND DID NOT EVEN 297 00:17:29,581 --> 00:17:31,717 HAVE A BREATH MINT. 298 00:17:31,717 --> 00:17:36,755 James: IT IS YOUR EYES THAT I REALLY LOVE. 299 00:17:36,755 --> 00:17:37,890 Colin: I'M REALLY IN IT. 300 00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:41,160 James: I BELIEVE BRENDAN STORY THAT HE WAS GOING FOR 301 00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:44,029 SOMETHING ELSE, BUT IN THAT MOMENT I THOUGHT THAT THIS IS 302 00:17:44,029 --> 00:17:45,264 EVERYTHING THAT YOU NEED. 303 00:17:45,264 --> 00:17:48,667 Colin: A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS, BUT I CAN'T DENY 304 00:17:48,667 --> 00:17:49,334 THAT. 305 00:17:49,334 --> 00:17:51,370 IT'S THERE IN BLACK AND WHITE. 306 00:17:51,370 --> 00:17:55,574 James: SOMETHING YOU BOTH COMBINATION, YOU BEGAN YOUR 307 00:17:55,574 --> 00:18:00,045 CAREERS ON IRISH SOAP OPERAS, BRENDAN YOU WERE ON A SHOW 308 00:18:00,045 --> 00:18:08,620 CALLED "GLENROE" HERE TO TELL ME THIS GUY. 309 00:18:08,620 --> 00:18:12,858 Colin: OH, IF I HAD SEEN THEM BACK THEN. 310 00:18:12,858 --> 00:18:16,061 SMOLDERING OVER A BREAKFAST ROLL. 311 00:18:16,061 --> 00:18:19,431 YOU LOOK LIKE, IF I KNOWN HIM BACK THEN, THERE MIGHT'VE BEEN 312 00:18:19,431 --> 00:18:22,501 SOME TONGUE IN THAT CASE. 313 00:18:22,501 --> 00:18:25,671 James: THIS GUY LOOKS LIKE A MAN WHO ENJOYED HIS FIRST 314 00:18:25,671 --> 00:18:29,842 BRUSH WITH FAME, DID YOU ENJOY IT? 315 00:18:29,842 --> 00:18:30,609 Brendan: NO. 316 00:18:30,609 --> 00:18:31,777 IDENTITY. 317 00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:34,780 IT WAS THE FIRST TIME I WENT INTO A SHOP AND FELT THE EYES 318 00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:38,283 BURROWING IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD AND I SAID OH, GOD, I AM GOING 319 00:18:38,283 --> 00:18:40,619 TO HAVE TO ADJUST TO THIS. 320 00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:45,924 BECAUSE I HAD BEEN IN PLAYS AND KNOWN IN PLACE, BUT THAT'S BE 321 00:18:45,924 --> 00:18:49,828 LOVELY, SOMEBODY WHO HAS SEEN THE PLAY SAYS I SAW YOU IN THE 322 00:18:49,828 --> 00:18:50,429 PLAY. 323 00:18:50,429 --> 00:18:53,065 AND THAT'S WHAT YOU DO IT. 324 00:18:53,065 --> 00:18:56,001 BUT THAT'S, I JUST THOUGHT, BECAUSE IT IS IN THE LIVING ROOM 325 00:18:56,001 --> 00:18:58,737 OR WHATEVER, PEOPLE FEEL THEY KNOW YOU IN A DIFFERENT WAY. 326 00:18:58,737 --> 00:19:08,046 AND WENT DOWN TO A PLACE CALLED ELLIS IN THE WEST OF IRELAND 327 00:19:08,046 --> 00:19:12,017 THERE WAS A WHOLE GROUP OF WOMEN WHO I THINK WERE A PART OF THE 328 00:19:12,017 --> 00:19:16,154 LIONS CLUB OR SOMETHING OF THAT NATURE IN THE TOWN, AND THEY 329 00:19:16,154 --> 00:19:19,024 BASICALLY TOSSED HER OUT OF THE WAY. 330 00:19:19,024 --> 00:19:20,092 Colin: MARY? 331 00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:22,194 Brendan: NOT EASILY DONE. 332 00:19:22,194 --> 00:19:23,829 AND SHE SAID, WHAT'S GOING ON? 333 00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:29,501 AND THEY CAME AT ME FOR THE WAY THAT I WAS TREATING FIONA IN THE 334 00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:30,669 SOAP OPERA. 335 00:19:30,669 --> 00:19:32,471 MY CHARACTER IN THE SHOW, I WAS LEAVING HER AND I WAS NOT 336 00:19:32,471 --> 00:19:34,806 STANDING BY HER. 337 00:19:34,806 --> 00:19:36,775 IT WAS THE WEIRDEST THING. 338 00:19:36,775 --> 00:19:41,647 AND THEY ARE HAVING A LAUGH, BUT IT WAS KIND OF-- I DID NOT 339 00:19:41,647 --> 00:19:44,483 KNOW, SOME OF THOSE WOMEN WERE ENTIRELY BELIEVING. 340 00:19:44,483 --> 00:19:46,919 Colin: IT MUST HAVE BEEN CONVINCING IN THE SHOW. 341 00:19:46,919 --> 00:19:48,554 Brendan: IT WAS SO BIZARRE. 342 00:19:48,554 --> 00:19:53,025 BUT I ASKED THEM TO KILL ME OFF-- 343 00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:55,360 [LAUGHTER] BECAUSE I HAD BEEN A TEACHER FOR 344 00:19:55,360 --> 00:20:01,066 LIKE TEN YEARS PRIOR, AND I DID NOT WANT TO BE TIED TO THE JOB. 345 00:20:01,066 --> 00:20:02,401 I WANTED TO GO DO STUFF. 346 00:20:02,401 --> 00:20:04,970 BUT THEY SENT ME TO KENYA. 347 00:20:04,970 --> 00:20:07,906 SO HE IS STILL IN KENYA SOMEWHERE. 348 00:20:07,906 --> 00:20:13,111 James: HE IS STILL IN KE KENYA, AND IT'S NOT ON ANYMORE? 349 00:20:13,111 --> 00:20:15,280 Colin: RAN FOR 20 PLUS YEARS OR SOMETHING. 350 00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:18,784 James: IF YOU CALLED UP THE PRODUCERS AND SAID, YOU KNOW IT, 351 00:20:18,784 --> 00:20:23,422 GOING TO COME BACK FROM KENYA, THEY WOULD GREEN LIGHT THAT SHOW 352 00:20:23,422 --> 00:20:24,289 STRAIGHTAWAY. 353 00:20:24,289 --> 00:20:25,824 Brendan: OH, THANKS. 354 00:20:25,824 --> 00:20:31,396 IT'S BEEN YOU ARE NO STRANGER, BECAUSE HE STARTED IN A IRISH 355 00:20:31,396 --> 00:20:33,131 SOAP OPERA CALLED "BALLYKISSANGEL," WHICH I 356 00:20:33,131 --> 00:20:34,466 REMEMBER VERY FONDLY. 357 00:20:34,466 --> 00:20:38,070 THERE YOU ARE. 358 00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:39,805 [LAUGHTER] NOW WHO DID YOU-- 359 00:20:39,805 --> 00:20:44,109 Colin: THAT'S MY HEAD SHOT úBACK WHEN I WAS POLE DANCING. 360 00:20:44,109 --> 00:20:48,680 James: WHO DID YOU PLAY IN "BALLYKISSANGEL"? 361 00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:51,683 Colin: I PLAYED DELI BURN, HE WAS A RAGAMUFFIN, AND HE GOT 362 00:20:51,683 --> 00:20:55,020 IN A SPOT WITH THE LOCAL LAW IN THE CITY AND HAD TO FIND HIS WAY 363 00:20:55,020 --> 00:21:01,860 TO THE COUNTRYSIDE TO WEAR HIS UNCLE PLAYED BY BERTIE SWEENEY. 364 00:21:01,860 --> 00:21:03,395 Brendan: DO YOU REMEMBER? 365 00:21:03,395 --> 00:21:05,263 THE MAGIC HE WAS. 366 00:21:05,263 --> 00:21:07,966 James: AND YOUR CHARACTER WENT TO KENYA? 367 00:21:07,966 --> 00:21:10,769 Colin: ABSOLUTELY. 368 00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:11,203 SIERRA LEONE. 369 00:21:11,203 --> 00:21:13,505 THE OTHER PLACE. 370 00:21:13,505 --> 00:21:15,707 THANK YOU, REGGIE. 371 00:21:15,707 --> 00:21:20,479 James: LET'S TALK ABOUT "THE BANSHEES OF INISHERIN," 372 00:21:20,479 --> 00:21:22,881 NOMINATED FOR NINE ACADEMY AWARDS! 373 00:21:22,881 --> 00:21:30,455 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] BRENDAN HAS NOT CAUGHT IT YET. 374 00:21:30,455 --> 00:21:34,026 AND I CAN'T RECOMMEND IT ENOUGH. 375 00:21:34,026 --> 00:21:36,094 WHAT IS IT ABOUT? 376 00:21:36,094 --> 00:21:37,696 Colin: IT'S DIFFERENT TO EVERYONE WHO SEES IT. 377 00:21:37,696 --> 00:21:43,001 IT'S ABOUT THE CORE DISSOLUTION OF FRIENDSHIP. 378 00:21:43,001 --> 00:21:48,040 THE SUDDEN AND UNCOMPROMISING DECISION OF ONE MAN, MEAN MAN 379 00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:50,442 MAKES IN DECIDING THERE IS A LANE IN THE SAND AND HE DOESN'T 380 00:21:50,442 --> 00:21:53,545 WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH THE OTHER MUCH NICER FELLA. 381 00:21:53,545 --> 00:21:56,815 James: I LOVE THE FILM SO MUCH, I LOVE EVERY SINGLE 382 00:21:56,815 --> 00:21:58,884 PERFORMANCE AND IT IS BEAUTIFUL. 383 00:21:58,884 --> 00:22:03,455 AND COLIN COMING TO WORK VERY CLOSELY WITH SEVERAL ANIMALS IN 384 00:22:03,455 --> 00:22:04,656 THE FILM. 385 00:22:04,656 --> 00:22:08,827 SPECIFICALLY THIS MINIATURE DONKEY NAMED JENNY, JENNY IS A 386 00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:11,296 STAR AND HER OWN RIGHT. 387 00:22:11,296 --> 00:22:14,933 BUT TELL ME IS THIS TRUE, BECAUSE I HAVE READ, IS IT TRUE 388 00:22:14,933 --> 00:22:21,106 THAT JENNY, THE DONKEY, HAS HER OWN EMOTIONAL SUPPORT DONKEY? 389 00:22:21,106 --> 00:22:21,740 Colin: SHE DID. 390 00:22:21,740 --> 00:22:25,477 James: HOW THAT HAPPEN? 391 00:22:25,477 --> 00:22:27,312 Colin: I DON'T KNOW IF SHE REQUESTED IT. 392 00:22:27,312 --> 00:22:29,815 James: WHY IS IT NECESSARY? 393 00:22:29,815 --> 00:22:34,019 Colin: SHE WAS A NERVOUS WRECK. 394 00:22:34,019 --> 00:22:35,854 James: SHE LOVED "IN BRUGES." 395 00:22:35,854 --> 00:22:37,422 IT'S A BIG DEAL FOR HER. 396 00:22:37,422 --> 00:22:41,026 Colin: SHE SAW MY WORK AND WAS AIMING HIGHER WITH HER 397 00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:41,993 CAREER. 398 00:22:41,993 --> 00:22:46,832 James: ALL MY LIFE "PADDINGTON 2." 399 00:22:46,832 --> 00:22:50,435 Colin: BEING ON A FILM SET AS YOU KNOW, IT CAN BE AN 400 00:22:50,435 --> 00:22:52,604 AWKWARD PLACE TO BE ESPECIALLY-- DO YOU VISIT A 401 00:22:52,604 --> 00:22:55,907 FRIEND WHEN THEY ARE SHOOTING THE FILM? 402 00:22:55,907 --> 00:22:58,643 IT'S VERY WEED, YOU FEEL LIKE YOU ARE IN THE WAY. 403 00:22:58,643 --> 00:23:02,013 James: IT'S LIKE GOING TO A FANCY DRESS PARTY AND NOBODY IS 404 00:23:02,013 --> 00:23:02,481 IN FANCY DRESS. 405 00:23:02,481 --> 00:23:05,650 WHY ARE THEY HERE? 406 00:23:05,650 --> 00:23:08,186 Colin: THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT JENNY SAID, SHE SAID IT'S LIKE 407 00:23:08,186 --> 00:23:10,722 BEING AT A FANCY DRESS PARTY AND NOBODY ELSE IS DRESSED UP. 408 00:23:10,722 --> 00:23:13,458 I NEED A SUPPORT DONKEY. 409 00:23:13,458 --> 00:23:16,428 SO THEY CAST ROSIE, THE SUPPORT DONKEY AND WHAT HAPPEN WAS JENNY 410 00:23:16,428 --> 00:23:18,630 DID NOT KNOW WHAT SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DOING. 411 00:23:18,630 --> 00:23:27,038 IT'S HER FIRST FILM, SHE'S A 2-YEAR-OLD BIT OF ASS. 412 00:23:27,038 --> 00:23:28,173 LITERALLY, ANYWAY. 413 00:23:28,173 --> 00:23:30,442 SO SHE WOULD GET NERVOUS AND SHE WOULD NOT HIT HER MARKS. 414 00:23:30,442 --> 00:23:32,677 AND THEY WOULD GO, BRING IN ROSIE. 415 00:23:32,677 --> 00:23:38,049 AND THEN HE WOULD HEAR A CLIP, KLOPP, CLIP, KLOPP. 416 00:23:38,049 --> 00:23:41,653 AND ROSIE WOULD COME AROUND THE CORNER AND HE WOULD SEE JENNY 417 00:23:41,653 --> 00:23:42,888 COME DOWN. 418 00:23:42,888 --> 00:23:45,290 AND SHE WOULD GO UP AND NUZZLE ROSIE A LITTLE BIT, AND HE WOULD 419 00:23:45,290 --> 00:23:48,460 GIVE THEM A FEW SECONDS AND THEN BRING JENNY BACK. 420 00:23:48,460 --> 00:23:50,662 James: YOU KNOW IT, AND MAKES ABSOLUTE SENSE. 421 00:23:50,662 --> 00:23:53,465 BECAUSE IMAGINE NOW, RIGHT READ YOUR NEXT NEXT JOB YOU TURN UP 422 00:23:53,465 --> 00:24:00,272 AND IT'S YOU AND AN ENTIRE ROOM OF DONKEY'S. 423 00:24:00,272 --> 00:24:02,274 OKAY? 424 00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:06,978 AND THERE'S A DONKEY ON THE CAMERA, A DONKEY WITH A BOOM. 425 00:24:06,978 --> 00:24:10,148 Brendan: I WOULD LIKE TO WORK ON A MOVIE LIKE THAT. 426 00:24:10,148 --> 00:24:12,384 James: LET'S LOOK AT A CLIP FROM "THE BANSHEES OF INISHERIN" 427 00:24:12,384 --> 00:24:14,986 STREAMING RIGHT NOW ON HBO MAX. 428 00:24:14,986 --> 00:24:17,923 YOU USE TO BE NICE! 429 00:24:17,923 --> 00:24:18,690 DID HE NOT? 430 00:24:18,690 --> 00:24:20,926 AND NOW, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? 431 00:24:20,926 --> 00:24:24,830 NOT NICE. 432 00:24:24,830 --> 00:24:29,234 I SUPPOSE NICENESS DOES NOT LAST, DOES IT, PADRAIC. 433 00:24:29,234 --> 00:24:31,269 BUT I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING THAT DOES LAST-- 434 00:24:31,269 --> 00:24:32,170 WHAT? 435 00:24:32,170 --> 00:24:34,806 AND DON'T SAY SOMETHING STUPID LIKE MUSIC. 436 00:24:34,806 --> 00:24:36,675 MUSIC CLASS. 437 00:24:36,675 --> 00:24:38,810 THE PAINTING LASTS, AND POETRY LASTS. 438 00:24:38,810 --> 00:24:43,615 SODAS NICENESS. 439 00:24:43,615 --> 00:24:49,387 DO YOU KNOW WHO WE REMEMBER WHO NICE HE WAS IN THE 17TH 440 00:24:49,387 --> 00:24:49,688 CENTURY? 441 00:24:49,688 --> 00:24:50,989 WHO? 442 00:24:50,989 --> 00:24:55,827 ABSOLUTELY NO ONE, BUT WE REMEMBER THE MUSIC, EVERYONE 443 00:24:55,827 --> 00:24:56,628 REMEMBERS MOZART'S NAME. 444 00:24:56,628 --> 00:24:57,963 I DON'T, THERE GOES THAT THEORY. 445 00:24:57,963 --> 00:24:58,496 James: STICK AROUND. 446 00:24:58,496 --> 00:25:00,565 WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK. 447 00:25:00,565 --> 00:25:01,132 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 448 00:25:15,981 --> 00:25:18,750 James: WELCOME BACK, WE'RE HERE WITH OSCAR-NOMINEES COLIN 449 00:25:18,750 --> 00:25:23,889 FARRELL AND BRENDAN GLEESON. 450 00:25:23,889 --> 00:25:29,995 NOW BRENDAN, I THINK MOST PEOPLE REMEMBER SEEING YOU AND 451 00:25:29,995 --> 00:25:32,264 "BRAVEHEART" WHICH BROUGHT YOU TO LOS ANGELES FOR THE FIRST 452 00:25:32,264 --> 00:25:33,531 TIME. 453 00:25:33,531 --> 00:25:36,568 WHEN YOU THINK BACK TO THAT TIME FIRST COMING TO L.A., NOW YOU'RE 454 00:25:36,568 --> 00:25:40,939 HERE A LOT, WHAT DID YOU MAKE OF HOLLYWOOD WHEN HE FIRST GOT HE 455 00:25:40,939 --> 00:25:41,873 HERE? 456 00:25:41,873 --> 00:25:43,975 Brendan: WELL, IT WAS KIND OF THRILLING. 457 00:25:43,975 --> 00:25:50,348 I CAME OVER FOR THE PREMIER OF "BRAVEHEART" AND WENT TO THE 458 00:25:50,348 --> 00:25:54,819 BACK LOT AT PARAMOUNT STUDIOS. 459 00:25:54,819 --> 00:26:02,994 AND MEL BROUGHT ALL OF THE GUYS IN THE BAND, THE GROUP AROUND 460 00:26:02,994 --> 00:26:03,929 OVER. 461 00:26:03,929 --> 00:26:07,599 AND I JUST-- IN FACT I WAS VERY JET-LAGGED, 462 00:26:07,599 --> 00:26:09,734 THE IMPLICATIONS OF THAT WORD, AND I WAS STANDING IN THE MIDDLE 463 00:26:09,734 --> 00:26:16,007 OF THE LOT AND I REMEMBER THE CHIEFTAINS WERE PLAYING, AND IT 464 00:26:16,007 --> 00:26:20,278 WAS 2000 AND I MET JODIE FOSTER, AND BIT FOR MY LIP 10 MINUTES 465 00:26:20,278 --> 00:26:23,481 AFTER SAYING IT WAS A TERRIBLE THING TO SAY TO ANYBODY EVEN 466 00:26:23,481 --> 00:26:25,250 THOUGH IT WAS TRUE. 467 00:26:25,250 --> 00:26:27,652 AND I FOUND MYSELF LOOKING AROUND NOT ABLE TO BELIEVE IT. 468 00:26:27,652 --> 00:26:32,490 THERE ARE A LOT OF THINGS ABOUT L.A. THAT I LOVE, AND ONE OF 469 00:26:32,490 --> 00:26:43,902 THEM IS THE EMBRACE OF STRANGENESS AND OTHERNESS. 470 00:26:43,902 --> 00:26:45,103 AND THERE'S ALWAYS THE FAITH THAT A NEW IDEA MIGHT BE LURKING 471 00:26:45,103 --> 00:26:46,237 SOMEWHERE IN A NEW TALENT. 472 00:26:46,237 --> 00:26:47,472 AND I KNOW THERE ARE LOTS OF THINGS WRONG AND IT DOES NOT 473 00:26:47,472 --> 00:26:50,008 HAPPEN FOR EVERYBODY, BUT WHEN IT HAPPENS THAT PEOPLE BRING IN 474 00:26:50,008 --> 00:26:54,079 THE DIVERSE AMOUNT OF PEOPLE THAT COME TO THIS PLACE, YOU GET 475 00:26:54,079 --> 00:26:55,313 THE MOST EXTRAORDINARY MIX OF TALENT. 476 00:26:55,313 --> 00:26:59,884 AND I HAVE LEARNED TO LOVE THE CITY FOR THAT MORE THAN ANYTHING 477 00:26:59,884 --> 00:27:00,752 ELSE. 478 00:27:00,752 --> 00:27:06,591 [APPLAUSE] James: COLIN COMING YOU'RE 479 00:27:06,591 --> 00:27:10,829 REMINDED ME JUST BEFORE THE SHOW, AND I THINK IT WAS LOTS OF 480 00:27:10,829 --> 00:27:13,298 PEOPLE ON THE SHOW, THAT WHEN WE-- AND IT FEELS STRANGE NOW 481 00:27:13,298 --> 00:27:19,170 THAT WE ARE SHOOTING THE SHOW 1,171 AND IT'S ABOUT TO END 482 00:27:19,170 --> 00:27:20,271 SOON! 483 00:27:20,271 --> 00:27:23,875 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] BUT COMPLETELY HAD FORGOTTEN ALL 484 00:27:23,875 --> 00:27:32,350 ABOUT IT REALLY THAT THE NINTH WE TAPED TO THE FIRST EVER "THE 485 00:27:32,350 --> 00:27:38,390 LATE LATE SHOW," I WENT TO DINNER IN MALIBU WITH COLIN, AND 486 00:27:38,390 --> 00:27:39,557 BONO, RIGHT? 487 00:27:39,557 --> 00:27:41,126 AND IT WAS ONE OF THE MOST EXTRAORDINARY NIGHTS OF MY LIFE 488 00:27:41,126 --> 00:27:44,596 AND I REMEMBER SITTING WITH YOU AND YOU SAID THE MOST GLORIOUS 489 00:27:44,596 --> 00:27:48,833 THINGS TO ME ABOUT LOS ANGELES AND BEING HERE. 490 00:27:48,833 --> 00:27:50,668 Colin: DID I? 491 00:27:50,668 --> 00:27:52,637 I DON'T FEEL LIKE THAT ANYMORE. 492 00:27:52,637 --> 00:27:53,738 [LAUGHTER] James: WE SAT OUTSIDE AND 493 00:27:53,738 --> 00:27:57,342 YOU SAID TO ME HOW WAS THE SHOW? 494 00:27:57,342 --> 00:28:00,245 AND I WAS LIKE I DON'T KNOW. 495 00:28:00,245 --> 00:28:02,947 Colin: YOU ARE IN A TIZZY. 496 00:28:02,947 --> 00:28:05,417 James: I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE HAVE JUST DONE. 497 00:28:05,417 --> 00:28:09,220 AND YOU SAID TO ME, YOU HAVE LANDED AT THIS PARTICULAR MOMENT 498 00:28:09,220 --> 00:28:12,757 IN YOUR LIFE WITH THIS BIG BLUE SKY, THERE ARE MORE CREATIVE 499 00:28:12,757 --> 00:28:15,460 PEOPLE PER SQUARE MILE HERE AT. 500 00:28:15,460 --> 00:28:17,429 YOU ARE LIKE YOU HAD TO SOAK UP EVERY INCH OF IT, YOU'RE GOING 501 00:28:17,429 --> 00:28:21,066 TO LOVE IT AND BE GREAT, THE SHOW WILL BE GRAND. 502 00:28:21,066 --> 00:28:25,804 AND I WAS LIKE THANKS, COLIN, THAT'S AMAZING! 503 00:28:25,804 --> 00:28:30,608 I MEAN, EARLY ON IN YOUR CAREER, AM I RIGHT IN THINKING USED TO 504 00:28:30,608 --> 00:28:35,413 FLY FRIENDS AND FAMILY OUT TO L.A. FROM IRELAND? 505 00:28:35,413 --> 00:28:39,884 Colin: YES, THE SAME HOTEL I USED TO STAY, I STAYED IN WHAT 506 00:28:39,884 --> 00:28:45,457 IS NOW WINDHAM WAS THE HOLLOW HOLIDAY INN RIGHT NEAR THE PIER 507 00:28:45,457 --> 00:28:49,194 IN SANTA MONICA, CAME UP WHEN I WAS 22 OR 23, JUST DOING 508 00:28:49,194 --> 00:28:52,597 MEETINGS, AND I WHEN I TO GET A LITTLE BIT OF WORK, I THINK PART 509 00:28:52,597 --> 00:28:55,967 OF IT WAS I JUST DID NOT WANT TO EXPERIENCE IT ON MY OWN. 510 00:28:55,967 --> 00:29:00,271 I DID NOT WANT TO GO HOME AND BE BORING PEOPLE WITH MY STORIES, I 511 00:29:00,271 --> 00:29:02,107 WANTED THEM TO HAVE THEIR OWN EXPERIENCE, SO WE COULD SAY DO 512 00:29:02,107 --> 00:29:06,744 YOU REMEMBER THAT TIME WHEN AND I WAS NOT JUST BOYS POSTING INTO 513 00:29:06,744 --> 00:29:09,481 THE VOID. 514 00:29:09,481 --> 00:29:14,052 SO THERE WERE TIMES WHERE I HAD 35 PEOPLE COME OVER, AND I 515 00:29:14,052 --> 00:29:16,654 REMEMBER SEEING MY UNCLE JUNIOR WITH HIS FACE LIKE BE TRUE TO 516 00:29:16,654 --> 00:29:21,893 READ GOT TOO MUCH SUN, AND ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT HE'S 517 00:29:21,893 --> 00:29:25,797 BEHIND ME IN AN INTERVIEW GOING-- 518 00:29:25,797 --> 00:29:26,831 YEAH, IT WAS BRILLIANT. 519 00:29:26,831 --> 00:29:28,566 AND THEN THEY WOULD COME OVER. 520 00:29:28,566 --> 00:29:31,669 AND THEY WOULD COME OVER FOR A WEEK AND GO TO UNIVERSAL STUDIOS 521 00:29:31,669 --> 00:29:34,806 AND DISNEYLAND, AND THEN WE WOULD ALL MEET AND HAVE 522 00:29:34,806 --> 00:29:38,443 COCKTAILS BEFORE AND DO THE PREMIER PARTIES, IT WAS AMAZING. 523 00:29:38,443 --> 00:29:41,279 IT WAS ABSOLUTE DEBAUCHERY AS WELL, BUT THERE WAS SOME CLASSIC 524 00:29:41,279 --> 00:29:41,946 TIMES. 525 00:29:41,946 --> 00:29:43,915 REALLY. 526 00:29:43,915 --> 00:29:48,353 AND I PROBABLY FELT, THIS IS NOT A POOR ME, SMALLEST VIOLIN IN 527 00:29:48,353 --> 00:29:52,056 THE WORLD SHOULD NOT BE PLAYED, BUT I THINK AT THAT TIME I WAS A 528 00:29:52,056 --> 00:29:54,993 LITTLE BIT MORE LONELY OR A LITTLE BIT MORE, I WAS NOT 529 00:29:54,993 --> 00:29:57,629 AWARE, A LITTLE BIT MORE MISSING LIFE AT HOME THEN I WAS WILLING 530 00:29:57,629 --> 00:30:02,000 TO ADMIT, BECAUSE I KNEW THAT I WAS ALSO REALLY FORTUNATE AND 531 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:03,868 LUCKY IN ALL OF THOSE OTHER THINGS. 532 00:30:03,868 --> 00:30:07,172 SO IT WAS LIKE I CAN'T EVEN MISS HOME, I'M NOT REALIZING HOW 533 00:30:07,172 --> 00:30:12,277 BLESSED I AM AND STUFF, SO ONE OF THE KIND OF THINGS WAS TO 534 00:30:12,277 --> 00:30:16,814 BRING AS MANY RELATIVES AND FRIENDS OVER WHENEVER I COULD. 535 00:30:16,814 --> 00:30:18,249 James: HOWEVER DEBAUCHERY IT WAS. 536 00:30:18,249 --> 00:30:22,687 IT DO YOU HAVE A QUESTION FOR A Reggie: YES, I DO, 537 00:30:22,687 --> 00:30:26,191 THANK YOU FOR ASKING ME FOR THE FIRST TIME. 538 00:30:26,191 --> 00:30:27,425 TONIGHT'S QUESTION IS... 539 00:30:27,425 --> 00:30:29,994 IRELAND IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE COUNTRIES IN THE WORLD, WHAT ARE 540 00:30:29,994 --> 00:30:35,166 YOUR PERSONAL FAVORITE PLACES IN IRELAND? 541 00:30:35,166 --> 00:30:38,436 Brendan: MY FAVORITE PLACES ARE THE THINGS I WANT TO KEEP TO 542 00:30:38,436 --> 00:30:43,041 MYSELF, BECAUSE A QUIET PLACE I CAN GO, I LIKE THIS PLACE THAT I 543 00:30:43,041 --> 00:30:48,413 GO A LOT, BUT I HAVE BEEN KIND OF ALL AROUND AND IT'S HARD TO 544 00:30:48,413 --> 00:30:52,550 MISS IF YOU HAVE THE TIME AND THE WHEREWITHAL JUST TO KIND OF 545 00:30:52,550 --> 00:30:57,922 LET IT HAPPEN TO YOU, ANYWHERE AROUND THE WEST COAST OF IRELAND 546 00:30:57,922 --> 00:31:01,859 IS GOING TO SUIT. 547 00:31:01,859 --> 00:31:05,930 THAT IS NONSPECIFIC. 548 00:31:05,930 --> 00:31:07,098 James: COLIN? 549 00:31:07,098 --> 00:31:09,934 Colin: THERE IS A TOWN THAT AT ONE STAGE WAS THE SECOND 550 00:31:09,934 --> 00:31:14,706 BIGGEST WHITE FISH PORT IN EUROPE, IT'S CALLED CASTLE 551 00:31:14,706 --> 00:31:21,312 BEARER, AND IT'S IN THE BARROW PENINSULA, AND IT CAN FEEL 552 00:31:21,312 --> 00:31:25,850 DIFFERENT, AND THE PEOPLE ARE EXTRAORDINARY, THEY ARE TOUGH 553 00:31:25,850 --> 00:31:27,218 AND FUNDAMENTALLY SO, SO DECENT. 554 00:31:27,218 --> 00:31:30,655 BUT THE LANDSCAPE IS BEAUTIFUL AND IT'S ON THE LIP OF THE 555 00:31:30,655 --> 00:31:31,856 ATLANTIC. 556 00:31:31,856 --> 00:31:34,826 IT'S ALSO WHERE I DID MY FIRST PROFESSIONAL JOB WHEN I WAS 20 557 00:31:34,826 --> 00:31:36,027 OR 21. 558 00:31:36,027 --> 00:31:38,329 AND I HAVE BEEN BACK THERE, TAKE MY KIDS THERE, SO THAT PLACE 559 00:31:38,329 --> 00:31:40,832 HOLDS A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART. 560 00:31:40,832 --> 00:31:45,637 James: IS THAT OKAY, REG? 561 00:31:45,637 --> 00:31:49,474 IT IS BEYOND CORRECT! 562 00:31:49,474 --> 00:31:50,508 COLIN FARRELL, BRENDAN GLEESON! 563 00:31:50,508 --> 00:31:51,175 STICK AROUND, CHRIS MARTIN IS HERE WITH STAND UP! 564 00:32:05,990 --> 00:32:07,158 James: WELCOME BACK! 565 00:32:07,158 --> 00:32:09,727 WE ARE SO EXCITED FOR THE GUEST WE HAVE COMING UP ON THE SHOW. 566 00:32:09,727 --> 00:32:11,863 MICHAEL B. JORDAN, JANE FONDA, LILY TOMLIN, JONATHAN MAJORS, 567 00:32:11,863 --> 00:32:15,233 TESSA THOMPSON, MILO VENTIMIGLIA, MATTHEW RHYS, AND 568 00:32:15,233 --> 00:32:19,937 OSCAR-NOMINEE HONG CHAU, PLUS WE'VE GOT MUSIC FROM STEPHEN 569 00:32:19,937 --> 00:32:22,840 SANCHEZ. 570 00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:24,609 AND SO MUCH MORE. 571 00:32:24,609 --> 00:32:25,009 BUT RIGHT AFTER THIS WE HAVE STAND-UP COMEDY FROM 572 00:32:25,009 --> 00:32:25,610 CHRIS MARTIN! 573 00:32:25,610 --> 00:32:27,378 YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS IT! 574 00:32:27,378 --> 00:32:28,446 COME ON, EVERYBODY! 575 00:32:41,492 --> 00:32:42,660 James: OUR NEXT GUEST IS A BRILLIANT STAND-UP COMEDIAN AND 576 00:32:42,660 --> 00:32:43,895 HOST OF THE OUTRAGEOUSLY FUNNY PODCAST, "GETTING MY DAD TO SAY 577 00:32:43,895 --> 00:32:47,765 I LOVE YOU." 578 00:32:47,765 --> 00:32:52,904 PLEASE WELCOME THE ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT CHRIS MARTIN! 579 00:32:52,904 --> 00:32:56,541 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Chris: THANK YOU, 580 00:32:56,541 --> 00:32:57,542 THANK YOU, ALL RIGHT. 581 00:32:57,542 --> 00:33:01,145 I AM BRITISH, BUT I LIVE IN AMERICA NOW! 582 00:33:01,145 --> 00:33:03,181 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] NOW HERE'S THE THING ABOUT 583 00:33:03,181 --> 00:33:08,052 LIVING IN AMERICA, EVERY TIME I THINK I UNDERSTAND THE CULTURE 584 00:33:08,052 --> 00:33:09,454 HERE, I MAKE A ROOKIE ERROR. 585 00:33:09,454 --> 00:33:13,424 AND THE BIGGEST ONE I MADE RECENTLY BY A MILE WAS I JOINED 586 00:33:13,424 --> 00:33:17,662 SOME BRITISH FRIENDS FOR A BACHELOR PARTY IN LAS VEGAS FOR 587 00:33:17,662 --> 00:33:22,734 FIVE DAYS. 588 00:33:22,734 --> 00:33:25,803 [LAUGHTER] MY NEW FAVORITE THING BY A MILE 589 00:33:25,803 --> 00:33:28,172 IS TELLING A BUNCH OF AMERICANS I WENT TO VEGAS FOR FIVE DAYS. 590 00:33:28,172 --> 00:33:36,447 BECAUSE YOU GUYS ACT LIKE I JUST SAID I WENT TO FIGHT IN IRAQ FOR 591 00:33:36,447 --> 00:33:39,650 NINE YEARS. 592 00:33:39,650 --> 00:33:41,119 "DUDE, TOO LONG, FIVE DAYS, WAY TOO LONG, BUDDY. 593 00:33:41,119 --> 00:33:47,759 YOU WANT TO DIE?" THEN WHAT YOU LOVE TO DO IS SHOW 594 00:33:47,759 --> 00:33:55,900 OFF TO ME ABOUT HOW TINY A TIME PRIME YOU GO TO VEGAS FOR. 595 00:33:55,900 --> 00:33:58,803 "WHEN I GO, 2 DAYS MAX, ONE NIGHT, TWO DAYS, THAT'S 596 00:33:58,803 --> 00:33:59,837 ENOUGH VEGAS. 597 00:33:59,837 --> 00:34:03,441 SOMETIMES I GOT TO THE CASINO ROLL ONE DICE, LEAVE 598 00:34:03,441 --> 00:34:05,410 THAT'S IT. 599 00:34:05,410 --> 00:34:09,914 STRIP CLUB, ONE NIPPLE, BYE VEGAS. 600 00:34:09,914 --> 00:34:13,851 I DRIVE TO VEGAS, I GET PAST THE VEGAS SIGN, I IMMEDIATELY TURNED 601 00:34:13,851 --> 00:34:17,021 AROUND, BECAUSE THAT IS ENOUGH VEGAS. 602 00:34:17,021 --> 00:34:20,691 SO I GOT TO VEGAS WRONG IS WHAT I'M SAYING. 603 00:34:20,691 --> 00:34:24,729 ONE THING I DID WRITE AS I LIVE IN LOS ANGELES, AND I AM THE 604 00:34:24,729 --> 00:34:27,698 PROUD OWNER OF A STANDARD ISSUE TINY DOG. 605 00:34:27,698 --> 00:34:35,072 I HAVE ONE OF THOSE LITTLE, LOOKS LIKE A REAL DOG GOT HIT BY 606 00:34:35,072 --> 00:34:41,112 LIGHTNING ON "MARIO KART." 607 00:34:41,112 --> 00:34:44,982 [LAUGHTER] I OWN A QUARTER OF A REGULAR 608 00:34:44,982 --> 00:34:45,950 SIZE DOG. 609 00:34:45,950 --> 00:34:47,952 AND I LOVE IT, BECAUSE I NEVER HAD ONE BEFORE. 610 00:34:47,952 --> 00:34:51,589 SO I KEEP LEARNING, NOT JUST ABOUT THE DOG, BUT ABOUT THE 611 00:34:51,589 --> 00:34:52,857 VET. 612 00:34:52,857 --> 00:34:54,292 I'D NEVER BEEN TO A VET BEFORE I GOT THIS DOG, I USED TO THINK A 613 00:34:54,292 --> 00:34:57,728 VET WAS LIKE AN EXPERT THAT UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING ABOUT 614 00:34:57,728 --> 00:35:01,899 ANIMALS. 615 00:35:01,899 --> 00:35:03,935 BUT NOW I'VE BEEN A FEW TIMES I'VE REALIZED WHAT HAPPENS AT 616 00:35:03,935 --> 00:35:13,411 THE VET IS YOU PAY THEM A LOT OF MONEY, AND WHAT THEY DO IS THEY 617 00:35:13,411 --> 00:35:18,049 GUESS WHAT MIGHT BE WRONG WITH YOUR CREATURE. 618 00:35:18,049 --> 00:35:19,383 I WAS LIKE WHAT'S WRONG? 619 00:35:19,383 --> 00:35:22,186 THEY WERE LIKE, IT COULD BE A NUMBER OF THINGS. 620 00:35:22,186 --> 00:35:25,590 AND I'M LIKE, YEAH, THAT'S WHY I BROUGHT HIM TO YOU TO GET THE 621 00:35:25,590 --> 00:35:27,492 NUMBER DOWN TO ONE THING. 622 00:35:27,492 --> 00:35:29,694 TO DO THAT YOU HAVE TO GET AN X-RAY. 623 00:35:29,694 --> 00:35:32,096 AND I'M LIKE HOW MUCH IS AN X-RAY? 624 00:35:32,096 --> 00:35:35,066 AND THEY ARE LIKE THINK OF THE BIGGEST NUMBER YOU'VE EVER 625 00:35:35,066 --> 00:35:38,436 THOUGHT OF IN YOUR LIFE, AND THEN DOUBLET. 626 00:35:38,436 --> 00:35:39,871 THAT'S HOW MUCH AN X-RAY IS. 627 00:35:39,871 --> 00:35:43,474 AND I'M LIKE WHY IS AN X-RAY THAT EXPENSIVE? 628 00:35:43,474 --> 00:35:48,379 SURELY I CAN SPEND $50 ON A SPIRIT AIRLINE TICKET, GET TO 629 00:35:48,379 --> 00:35:52,450 TSA, PUT MY DOG ON THE CONVEYOR BELT THING THAT GOES THROUGH. 630 00:35:52,450 --> 00:35:55,853 AND THEY CAN TAKE A PHOTO ON MY PHONE. 631 00:35:55,853 --> 00:35:58,890 SOME OF YOU LAUGHING, SOME OF YOUR LIKE, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA. 632 00:35:58,890 --> 00:36:01,058 I WILL TRY IT MYSELF. 633 00:36:01,058 --> 00:36:04,495 HERE'S THE THING, I KNOW THAT VETS ARE GOOD, AND MY VET IS 634 00:36:04,495 --> 00:36:05,730 AMAZING. 635 00:36:05,730 --> 00:36:08,232 THIS IS HOW I KNOW, SHE GAVE ME THE GREATEST DIAGNOSIS OF ALL 636 00:36:08,232 --> 00:36:09,400 TIME LAST SUMMER. 637 00:36:09,400 --> 00:36:12,870 I TOOK MY DOG AND, BECAUSE WHEN I WAS WALKING HIM DOWN THE 638 00:36:12,870 --> 00:36:15,740 STREET COME EVERY FEW YARDS HE WAS FREAKING OUT AND SITTING 639 00:36:15,740 --> 00:36:16,807 DOWN. 640 00:36:16,807 --> 00:36:20,711 SO TO COME IN, TELL THE TECHNICIAN, THE VET SAYS HE 641 00:36:20,711 --> 00:36:21,512 KEEPS DOING THAT? 642 00:36:21,512 --> 00:36:23,814 CAN I ASK YOU ONE QUESTION? 643 00:36:23,814 --> 00:36:26,384 DID HE USED TO HAVE A LOT MORE HAIR UNTIL QUITE RECENTLY? 644 00:36:26,384 --> 00:36:30,388 AND I SAID YEAH, HE HAD WAY MORE HAIR LIKE THREE DAYS AGO, AND IT 645 00:36:30,388 --> 00:36:33,190 WAS SUMMER, SO WE SHAVED IT ALL OFF. 646 00:36:33,190 --> 00:36:35,192 SHE SAID THIS IS WHAT I THINK IS HAPPENING. 647 00:36:35,192 --> 00:36:38,396 IF HE IS FREAKING OUT AND SENDING DOWN AND HE HAD A LOT OF 648 00:36:38,396 --> 00:36:43,434 HAIR UNTIL RECENTLY, I THINK YOUR DOG IS SUFFERING FROM-- 649 00:36:43,434 --> 00:36:50,741 AND IT'S APPARENTLY NO MORE MEDICAL TERMINOLOGY THAN THIS-- 650 00:36:50,741 --> 00:36:57,415 FROM A BREEZY BUTTHOLE. 651 00:36:57,415 --> 00:36:59,517 [LAUGHTER] AND WHEN SHE SAID THAT, I SAID, 652 00:36:59,517 --> 00:37:05,222 CAN YOU REPEAT THAT AND TO LET ME RECORD IT ON MY PHONE? 653 00:37:05,222 --> 00:37:09,527 BECAUSE IT IS NOT EVERY DAY A TRAINED MEDIC DIAGNOSES YOUR 654 00:37:09,527 --> 00:37:18,669 CREATURE WITH A DRAFTY-- IT'S A REAL THING, IF YOUR DOG 655 00:37:18,669 --> 00:37:22,573 HAS LOADS OF HAIR BLOCKING THAT AREA, AND YOU SHAVE IT AWAY AND 656 00:37:22,573 --> 00:37:28,713 THE WIND GOES UP THERE, IT FREAKS THEM THE HELL OUT. 657 00:37:28,713 --> 00:37:34,018 AND I'VE NEVER FELT MORE CONNECTED TO MY DOG THEN WHEN I 658 00:37:34,018 --> 00:37:34,885 HEARD THAT INFORMATION. 659 00:37:34,885 --> 00:37:39,590 [APPLAUSE] BECAUSE IF I WAS WALKING DOWN 660 00:37:39,590 --> 00:37:44,762 THE STREET, AND UNBEKNOWNST TO ME, SOMEBODY HAD CUT A HOLE OUT 661 00:37:44,762 --> 00:37:48,699 OF MY TROUSERS AND UNDERPANTS, AND I FELT THAT GUST, I WOULD 662 00:37:48,699 --> 00:37:52,069 SI DOWN AND NEVER STAND UP EVER AGAIN. 663 00:37:52,069 --> 00:37:54,805 GUYS, THAT IS MY TIME. 664 00:37:54,805 --> 00:37:55,873 I AM NOT AN, THANK YOU! 665 00:37:59,744 --> 00:38:02,346 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] James: WHAT ABOUT THAT? 666 00:38:02,346 --> 00:38:03,514 CHRIS MARTIN, EVERYBODY! 667 00:38:03,514 --> 00:38:04,448 HIS PODCAST "GETTING MY DAD TO SAY I LOVE YOU" IS STREAMING 668 00:38:04,448 --> 00:38:05,516 NOW. 669 00:38:24,969 --> 00:38:25,903 James: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING. 670 00:38:25,903 --> 00:38:26,971 REGGIE, TAKE US HOME!