1 00:00:01,735 --> 00:00:16,616 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:16,616 --> 00:00:18,518 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 3 00:00:18,518 --> 00:00:20,320 ♪ ♪ LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, ALL THE 4 00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:26,292 WAY FROM COLUMBUS, OHIO, GIVE IT UP FOR YOUR HOST, THE ONE, THE 5 00:00:26,292 --> 00:00:37,937 ONLY, JAMES CORDEN! [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 6 00:00:37,937 --> 00:00:51,651 James: THANK YOU VERY, VERY MUCH! 7 00:00:51,651 --> 00:00:53,720 THANKS FOR LETTING US BE THE LAST PART OF YOUR DAY! 8 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:57,157 BLESS YOU. OUR GUEST ON THE SHOW TONIGHT, 9 00:00:57,157 --> 00:00:59,826 EMMY AWARD-WINNING ACTOR, PODCAST OWES YOU KNOW FROM 11 10 00:00:59,826 --> 00:01:03,797 GLORIOUS SEASONS ON THE HIT SERIES "MODERN FAMILY," THE 11 00:01:03,797 --> 00:01:09,169 ARLISS JULIA BOWEN IS HERE! AND ACTOR, WRITER, DIRECTOR YOU 12 00:01:09,169 --> 00:01:13,206 KNOW FROM "SCRUBS," "GARDEN STATE," AND HIS NEW FILM "A GOOD 13 00:01:13,206 --> 00:01:17,010 PERSON" IS ALREADY ONE OF MY FAVORITE FILMS OF THE YEAR, 14 00:01:17,010 --> 00:01:20,747 YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE IT SO MUCH, THE EVER-CHARMING MR. ZACH 15 00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,682 BRAFF! [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 16 00:01:22,682 --> 00:01:24,984 AND TREMENDOUSLY TALENTED STAND-UP COMEDIAN WE ARE 17 00:01:24,984 --> 00:01:28,588 THRILLED WILL BE PERFORMING, THE BRILLIANT MORVIN SPLAVERSBY IS 18 00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:31,257 HERE! ARE YOU READY? 19 00:01:31,257 --> 00:01:44,471 THIS IS THE "LATE LATE SHOW." [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 20 00:01:44,471 --> 00:01:55,748 ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ 21 00:01:55,748 --> 00:01:59,586 James: IT'S THAT TIME, IT'S TIME FOR THE NEWS. 22 00:01:59,586 --> 00:02:02,522 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] AS YOU KNOW, FORMER 23 00:02:02,522 --> 00:02:06,426 PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP IS CURRENTLY FACING MAJOR LEGAL 24 00:02:06,426 --> 00:02:09,262 PROBLEMS, BUT ACCORDING TO CONSTITUTIONAL EXPERTS, EVEN IF 25 00:02:09,262 --> 00:02:13,533 HE ENDS UP BEING CONVICTED OF ONE OR MORE CRIMES, TRUMP COULD 26 00:02:13,533 --> 00:02:17,904 STILL BE ELECTED PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. 27 00:02:17,904 --> 00:02:20,440 IF JANUARY 6TH WAS ANY INDICATION, HE COULD ALSO BE 28 00:02:20,440 --> 00:02:23,843 ELECTED PRESIDENT EVEN IF HE ISN'T ELECTED PRESIDENT. 29 00:02:23,843 --> 00:02:25,979 [LAUGHTER] TRUMP COULD BECOME PRESIDENT 30 00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:26,746 AFTER BEING CONVICTED OF A CRIME. 31 00:02:26,746 --> 00:02:30,316 IMAGINE THAT. TODAY, FRENCH 32 00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:33,486 PRESIDENT EMMANUEL MACRON ATTENDED A STATE DINNER WITH 33 00:02:33,486 --> 00:02:37,423 PRESIDENT TRUMP AT THE CAFETERIA ON RIKERS ISLAND. 34 00:02:37,423 --> 00:02:41,294 HE WENT TO PRISON, I WOULD LOVE TO SEE TRUMP SUPPORTERS STILL 35 00:02:41,294 --> 00:02:43,363 DEFENDING HIM WHILST HE'S IN PRISON. 36 00:02:43,363 --> 00:02:46,533 IT WILL BE LIKE NO, HE IS STILL-- HE'S AN AMAZING 37 00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:50,236 BUSINESSMAN. HE NEGOTIATED GETTING THE TOP 38 00:02:50,236 --> 00:02:54,541 BUNK FROM A CONVICTED MURDERER, JUST SWAPPED A CELL PHONE FOR 39 00:02:54,541 --> 00:02:57,777 NINE CIGARETTES, HE'S A GENIUS! AND ACCORDING TO NEW RESEARCH, 40 00:02:57,777 --> 00:03:02,882 WEARING AN EYE MASK WHILE SLEEPING HELPS WITH COGNITIVE 41 00:03:02,882 --> 00:03:06,252 PERFORMANCE AND MAKES YOU FEEL MORE ALERT THE NEXT DAY. 42 00:03:06,252 --> 00:03:08,755 RESEARCHERS SAY IT'S GOOD FOR YOUR OVERALL BRAIN FUNCTION. 43 00:03:08,755 --> 00:03:15,461 I AGREE, I TO SLEEP WITH A MASK AND JUST OCCASIONALLY A BALL 44 00:03:15,461 --> 00:03:19,465 GOWN. [LAUGHTER] 45 00:03:19,465 --> 00:03:27,974 JAMES... James: TWO CLAMPS. 46 00:03:27,974 --> 00:03:30,944 TIED ONTO THE CAR BATTERY. THAT'S I WAS GOING TO ASK. 47 00:03:30,944 --> 00:03:33,580 James: WEARING AN EYE MASK IMPROVES YOUR BRAIN FUNCTION THE 48 00:03:33,580 --> 00:03:36,082 NEXT DAY AT ALSO TELLS PEOPLE RIGHT FROM THE START THAT I 49 00:03:36,082 --> 00:03:42,555 PERSONALLY AM 100% PURE DIVA. [LAUGHTER] 50 00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:45,725 YOU KNOW WHAT I'D LIKE? I'D LIKE AN EYE MASK THAT MADE 51 00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:50,330 OUT OF THE SILK-- TO REMEMBER WHEN NICK BERNSTEIN MORE THAT 52 00:03:50,330 --> 00:03:56,903 MASK THAT WAS MADE OUT OF HIS WIFE'S PANTIES? 53 00:03:56,903 --> 00:04:00,840 BACK WHEN WE HAD TO WEAR MASKS HERE WITHOUT AN AUDIENCE WE DID 54 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:05,378 A SHOW AND NICK ONE DAY CAME TO WORK AT HE HAD MADE A MASK OUT 55 00:04:05,378 --> 00:04:11,150 OF HIS WIFE'S SILK PANTIES. THERE HE IS, RIGHT? 56 00:04:11,150 --> 00:04:17,957 [APPLAUSE] [LAUGHS] 57 00:04:17,957 --> 00:04:21,394 DON'T IMPLY THAT I SOMEHOW LIKE STITCH THAT MASK TOGETHER 58 00:04:21,394 --> 00:04:26,933 AND THEN PUT IT ON-- I DIDN'T MAKE THAT MASK. 59 00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:29,602 James: SO YOU TOOK A PAIR OF YOUR WIFE'S PANTIES AND 60 00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:33,573 HANDED IT TO SOMEONE ELSE? THAT MAKES IT WEIRDER. 61 00:04:33,573 --> 00:04:38,077 IT MAKES THE STORY WEIRDER. I JUST ASSUME THAT YOU DIDN'T 62 00:04:38,077 --> 00:04:43,983 EVEN STITCH IT, YOU JUST PUT IT OVER THE YEARS. 63 00:04:43,983 --> 00:04:45,785 [LAUGHTER] A STANDBY, I THOUGHT THAT WAS 64 00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:50,556 A GREAT DECISION. James: AND FINALLY, A 65 00:04:50,556 --> 00:04:53,292 COMPANY HAS DESIGNED A PAIR OF AIRBAG GENES THAT INFLATE IF THE 66 00:04:53,292 --> 00:04:56,929 USER IS IN A MOTORCYCLE CRASH. THE TECHNOLOGY HAS BEEN USED IN 67 00:04:56,929 --> 00:04:59,599 COMPETITIVE RACING FOR YEARS. THIS OF THE FIRST TIME IT'S BEEN 68 00:04:59,599 --> 00:05:03,169 MADE AVAILABLE FOR REGULAR MOTORCYCLISTS. 69 00:05:03,169 --> 00:05:06,439 HERE THEY ARE. HERE, LOOK AT THAT. 70 00:05:06,439 --> 00:05:08,474 [LAUGHTER] HE LOOKS LIKE HE HAS JUST 71 00:05:08,474 --> 00:05:13,713 SHOPLIFTED FOUR HAMS. THOSE WERE COMMON HANDY TO THE 72 00:05:13,713 --> 00:05:16,783 PERFECT RESPONSE IF SOMEONE SAYS HEY, HAVE YOU BEEN SKIPPING LIKE 73 00:05:16,783 --> 00:05:21,020 THEY? BE LIKE WHAT TO DUDE, ALL I DO 74 00:05:21,020 --> 00:05:25,658 IS LEGS, BROTHER. THE AIRBAG GENES COME IN TWO 75 00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:29,796 VERSIONS. THIS FADED DENIM STYLE FOR 76 00:05:29,796 --> 00:05:32,298 CASUAL EVENTS AND FOR MORE FORMAL OCCASIONS LIKE AWARD 77 00:05:32,298 --> 00:05:36,369 SHOWS, YOU CAN GO. [APPLAUSE] 78 00:05:36,369 --> 00:05:40,373 AND THAT'S THE NEWS! WHEN I'M LATE TO WORK, THE ONLY 79 00:05:40,373 --> 00:05:43,209 THING THAT HELPS ME GET HER AS THE CAR PULLING AND FOR THAT I 80 00:05:43,209 --> 00:05:48,214 NEED SOMEONE TRAVELING WITH ME. THIS IS CARPOOL KARAOKE. 81 00:05:48,214 --> 00:05:49,549 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] James: THANK YOU SO MUCH 82 00:05:49,549 --> 00:05:51,417 FOR HELPING ME GET TO WORK TODAY. 83 00:05:51,417 --> 00:05:55,088 I REALLY APPRECIATE IT. IT'S A PLEASURE. 84 00:05:55,088 --> 00:05:57,757 James: I'M SO HAPPY YOU COULD FIND THE TIME. 85 00:05:57,757 --> 00:05:59,058 I LOVE THIS TOP. I LOVE THIS! 86 00:05:59,058 --> 00:06:03,196 THIS? I'M HAVING MY MOMENT-- WOMAN OF 87 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:06,566 GOD MOMENT. CHRISTIAN ERA. 88 00:06:06,566 --> 00:06:09,502 James: I WONDER WHEN I'M GOING TO HAVE MY WOMAN OF GOD 89 00:06:09,502 --> 00:06:10,870 MOMENT. I WONDER ONE. 90 00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:17,143 YOU JUST TO-- HAVE TO JUST FEEL THE CLASSINESS, LIKE THE 91 00:06:17,143 --> 00:06:20,513 CONNECTION. James: I AM A WOMAN OF GOD. 92 00:06:20,513 --> 00:06:24,117 DO YOU FEEL THAT? YOU KIND OF FEEL IT, RIGHT? 93 00:06:24,117 --> 00:06:29,522 James: YEAH. MARY MAGDALENE. 94 00:06:29,522 --> 00:06:32,558 WHO IS MARY MAGDALENE? James: IS A LONG STORY, 95 00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:35,862 LET'S NOT GET INTO IT. [LAUGHS] 96 00:06:35,862 --> 00:06:40,032 ♪ I'M GOING TO TAKE MY HORSE TO THE OLD TOWN ROAD ♪ 97 00:06:40,032 --> 00:06:43,402 ♪ GOING TO RIDE UNTIL I CAN'T NO MORE ♪ 98 00:06:43,402 --> 00:06:53,880 ♪ GOT MY-- RIDING ON A HORSE ♪ ♪ I'VE BEEN IN THE VALLEY ♪ 99 00:06:53,880 --> 00:07:00,253 ♪ YOU BEEN OFF THAT PORCH ♪ ♪ CAN'T NOBODY TELL ME NOTHING ♪ 100 00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:06,259 ♪ YOU CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING ♪ ♪ CAN'T NOBODY TELL ME NOTHING ♪ 101 00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:13,599 ♪ YOU CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING ♪ ♪ I'M GONNA TAKE MY HORSE TO THE 102 00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:18,571 OLD TOWN ROAD ♪ ♪ I'M GONNA RIDE TILL I CAN'T NO 103 00:07:18,571 --> 00:07:21,340 MORE, I'M GOING TO TAKE MY HORSE TO THE OLD TOWN ROAD ♪ 104 00:07:21,340 --> 00:07:26,579 ♪ I'M GONNA RIDE TILL I CAN'T NO MORE ♪ 105 00:07:26,579 --> 00:07:29,315 [APPLAUSE] James: TALK TO ABOUT YOUR 106 00:07:29,315 --> 00:07:33,953 FIRST LOVE OF MUSIC, BECAUSE YOU USED TO PLAY THE TRUMPET, RIGHT? 107 00:07:33,953 --> 00:07:37,657 I PLAYED THE TRUMPET IN MIDDLE SCHOOL AND I WAS REALLY 108 00:07:37,657 --> 00:07:41,360 GOOD AT IT, PEOPLE WERE LIKE YOU ARE SO GOOD AND I WAS LIKE FIRST 109 00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:44,363 SHARED TRUMPET-- NOT TOO BRIGHT. 110 00:07:44,363 --> 00:07:48,935 YOU HAVE A-- I'M NOT REALLY SURE HOW TO PLAY THIS THAT WELL 111 00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:51,571 ANYMORE. James: I'VE GOT ONE TOO. 112 00:07:51,571 --> 00:07:52,905 I STARTED LEARNING THE TRUMPET WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. 113 00:07:52,905 --> 00:07:59,812 LET ME PULL-- LET ME PULL IN. CAN YOU DO A SCALE? 114 00:07:59,812 --> 00:08:08,187 [LAUGHTER] ♪ ♪ 115 00:08:08,187 --> 00:08:10,556 James: WE ARE ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD! 116 00:08:10,556 --> 00:08:15,061 THE SOUNDS INCREDIBLE! James: I THOUGHT THIS WILL 117 00:08:15,061 --> 00:08:18,965 BE HILARIOUS, BUT NOW IN HERE I'M LIKE IT'S JUST TWO WOMEN OF 118 00:08:18,965 --> 00:08:23,302 GOD PLAYING THE TRUMPET. I WONDER IF WE CAN DO-- HOW 119 00:08:23,302 --> 00:08:26,372 DOES THE START OF "INDUSTRY BABY"-- 120 00:08:26,372 --> 00:08:34,146 WHAT NOTE WOULD THAT BE? ♪ ♪ 121 00:08:34,146 --> 00:08:41,153 WE WILL KEEP ON IT. ♪ A COUPLE GRAMMIES ON HIM ♪ 122 00:08:41,153 --> 00:08:42,655 ♪ COUPLE PLAQUES A ♪ ♪ THIS ONE IS FOR THE 123 00:08:42,655 --> 00:08:44,557 CHAMPIONS ♪ ♪ EIGHT BUT LOST SINCE I BEGAN ♪ 124 00:08:44,557 --> 00:08:46,926 ♪ FUNNY HOW YOU SAID IT WAS THE END ♪ 125 00:08:46,926 --> 00:08:56,602 ♪ THEN I WENT DID IT AGAIN ♪ ♪ I TOLD YOU LONG AGO ♪ 126 00:08:56,602 --> 00:08:58,604 ♪ ON THE ROAD ♪ ♪ I GOT WHAT THEY'RE WAITING 127 00:08:58,604 --> 00:09:01,641 FOR ♪ ♪ I DON'T RUN FROM NOTHING, 128 00:09:01,641 --> 00:09:03,809 DOG ♪ ♪ GET YOUR SOLDIERS, TELL THEM I 129 00:09:03,809 --> 00:09:06,612 AIN'T LAYING LOW ♪ ♪ YOU WAS NEVER REALLY ROOTING 130 00:09:06,612 --> 00:09:11,484 FOR ME ANYWAY ♪ ♪ WHEN I'M BACK UP AT THE TOP I 131 00:09:11,484 --> 00:09:14,153 WANT TO HEAR YOU SAY ♪ ♪ HE DON'T RUN FROM NOTHING, 132 00:09:14,153 --> 00:09:17,056 DOG ♪ ♪ GET YOUR SOLDIERS, TELL THEM 133 00:09:17,056 --> 00:09:23,129 THAT THE BREAK IS OVER ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 134 00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:26,365 GO HE IS HOT! James: LET'S SAY WE ARE NOT 135 00:09:26,365 --> 00:09:28,634 SHOOTING THIS, YOU SEE THAT HOT GUY, WHAT DO YOU DO? 136 00:09:28,634 --> 00:09:32,438 YOU PULLOVER? NO, THAT IS SCARY FOR PEOPLE, 137 00:09:32,438 --> 00:09:35,174 THAT'S REALLY SCARY. James: HOW DO YOU DIDN'T? 138 00:09:35,174 --> 00:09:38,477 HOW DO YOU MEET PEOPLE? I USED TO USE RIOT. 139 00:09:38,477 --> 00:09:42,548 STOMACH James: WHEN DID YOU STOP 140 00:09:42,548 --> 00:09:44,116 USING IT? IT FELL OFF HER ME AND I JUST 141 00:09:44,116 --> 00:09:50,122 STARTED TO MEET PEOPLE IN PERSON AND IT IS JUST VERY FAMOUS, 142 00:09:50,122 --> 00:09:55,261 EVERYONE IS FAMOUS ON THERE. I'VE MET QUITE A FEW FAMOUS 143 00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:57,997 GUYS. I THINK I'VE COME TO KNOW THAT I 144 00:09:57,997 --> 00:09:59,498 DON'T DATING FAMOUS PEOPLE. James: HAVE ANY OF THEM 145 00:09:59,498 --> 00:10:03,736 EVER DONE COUPLE KARAOKE? FOR SURE. 146 00:10:03,736 --> 00:10:10,209 James: ARE YOU SERIOUS? IS IT MICHAEL BUBLE? 147 00:10:10,209 --> 00:10:15,448 STICK ARE NOT GOING TO TELL YOU! [LAUGHTER] 148 00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:20,219 YOU CAUGHT ME! James: MICHAEL BUBLE! 149 00:10:20,219 --> 00:10:24,190 MICHAEL BUBLE IS GAY? James: NO, BUT HE'S HOT AND 150 00:10:24,190 --> 00:10:28,194 HE'S GOT A HELL OF INVOICE. ♪ ♪ 151 00:10:28,194 --> 00:10:35,201 ♪ GIVE ME SUNLIGHT ♪ ♪ WE CAN PARTY ♪ 152 00:10:35,201 --> 00:10:38,671 ♪ WE DID IT BEFORE ♪ ♪ AND WE WILL DO IT TONIGHT ♪ 153 00:10:38,671 --> 00:10:41,273 ♪ THESE DAYS ARE WAY TOO LONELY ♪ 154 00:10:41,273 --> 00:10:47,113 ♪ I MISSING ♪ ♪ THESE DAYS ARE WAY TOO LON 155 00:10:47,113 --> 00:10:52,818 LONELY ♪ ♪ I WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE ME ♪ 156 00:10:52,818 --> 00:11:02,661 ♪ I NEED SOMEONE WHO NEEDS ME ♪ ♪ THAT'S IT DON'T FEEL RIGHT 157 00:11:02,661 --> 00:11:05,564 WHEN IT'S LATE AT NIGHT ♪ ♪ AND IT'S JUST ME AND MY 158 00:11:05,564 --> 00:11:07,767 DREAMS ♪ ♪ SO I WANT ♪ 159 00:11:07,767 --> 00:11:15,741 ♪ SOMEONE TO LOVE ♪ ♪ THAT'S WHAT I REALLY WANT ♪ 160 00:11:15,741 --> 00:11:19,078 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] WHAT A TIME. 161 00:11:19,078 --> 00:11:21,447 James: WHAT A TIME. YOU ARE GOOD AT EXITS, GIVE ME 162 00:11:21,447 --> 00:11:24,583 HER ENGLISH ACCENT. MY ENGLISH ACCENT. 163 00:11:24,583 --> 00:11:26,852 IT LIKE THAT James: IT'S GOOD! 164 00:11:26,852 --> 00:11:30,289 YOU DO WANT TO DO SOME ACTING IN YOUR LIFE, RIGHT? 165 00:11:30,289 --> 00:11:33,092 I WANT TO DO SOME ACTING AT SOME POINT. 166 00:11:33,092 --> 00:11:36,429 James: BUT HAVE YOU DONE ANY ACTING PROFESSIONALLY? 167 00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:39,498 I HAVEN'T. James: I CAN ACTUALLY HELPúY. 168 00:11:39,498 --> 00:11:43,369 I CAN LINE SOMETHING UP. HAVE YOU EVER SEEN "THE BOLD AND 169 00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:45,838 THE BEAUTIFUL?" I'VE HEARD OF IT. 170 00:11:45,838 --> 00:11:47,206 Jame: TELL THEM YOU'VE SEEN IT BECAUSE YOU ARE ABOUT TO 171 00:11:47,206 --> 00:11:50,476 BE IN IT. I'VE SEEN "THE BOLD AND THE 172 00:11:50,476 --> 00:11:53,946 BEAUTIFUL." James: [LAUGHS] 173 00:11:53,946 --> 00:11:58,617 IS 174 00:11:58,617 --> 00:12:02,555 YOU GUYS GO DOWN HERE ONCE. YEAH. 175 00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:03,956 James: HELLO. ARE YOU CINDY? 176 00:12:03,956 --> 00:12:07,960 WELCOME, AND CINDY! James: I'M JAMES. 177 00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:10,863 MONTERO, NICE TO MEET YOU. NICE TO MEET YOU. 178 00:12:10,863 --> 00:12:14,033 James: FOR THE DIRECTOR OF THE SHOW? 179 00:12:14,033 --> 00:12:15,034 YES. James: WHO ARE WE PLAYING 180 00:12:15,034 --> 00:12:18,737 IN THIS SCENE? YOU ARE GOING TO BE MY WAITER 181 00:12:18,737 --> 00:12:21,440 AND I HAVE A SCRIPT HERE FOR YOU. 182 00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,476 JAMES, I DON'T HAVE A SCRIPT FOR YOU BECAUSE YOU WILL BE& 183 00:12:23,476 --> 00:12:26,779 BACKGROUND TODAY. James: SO I'VE GOT NO-- DO 184 00:12:26,779 --> 00:12:32,051 I HAVE A CHARACTER? YES, YOU ARE MY BUSBOY. 185 00:12:32,051 --> 00:12:35,654 SO YOU WILL WORK IN TANDEM WITH EACH OTHER AT ALL TIMES. 186 00:12:35,654 --> 00:12:38,324 James: WE WORK IN TANDEM BUT I AM MUTE. 187 00:12:38,324 --> 00:12:41,660 IS THIS A JOKE? IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE. 188 00:12:41,660 --> 00:12:44,263 James: DOES MY BUSBOY HAVE A NAME? 189 00:12:44,263 --> 00:12:46,432 CRAIG. CAN YOU JUST CALL ME CRAIG MECH 190 00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:48,634 I WOULD LIKE A CHANGE IN THE SCRIPT. 191 00:12:48,634 --> 00:12:53,205 HOW MANY LINES HAS HE GOT? I THINK HE'S GOT NINE. 192 00:12:53,205 --> 00:12:56,342 James: HAVE THEY GOT LINES? YES, BECAUSE THEY ARE THE 193 00:12:56,342 --> 00:12:59,612 STARS OF THE SHOW. James: WE WILL SEE ABOUT 194 00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:03,816 THAT, CINDY. [LAUGHTER] 195 00:13:03,816 --> 00:13:08,320 HOW ARE YOU FEELING? HONESTLY A LITTLE-- 196 00:13:08,320 --> 00:13:09,321 James: THIS IS THE BIG TIME. 197 00:13:09,321 --> 00:13:13,859 LOOK AT THESE SETS. THIS TRASH CAN LOOKS REAL 198 00:13:13,859 --> 00:13:14,894 BURIED James: I THINK IT IS A REAL 199 00:13:14,894 --> 00:13:17,296 TRASH CAN. LOOK. 200 00:13:17,296 --> 00:13:19,932 THERE IS A PRISON. LOOK AT THIS. 201 00:13:19,932 --> 00:13:25,504 TO BE IN HERE. ♪ I TOLD YOU LONG AGO ♪ 202 00:13:25,504 --> 00:13:30,676 ♪ ON THE ROAD ♪ ♪ I GOT WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ♪ 203 00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:32,211 James: YOU CARRY ON SINGING. 204 00:13:32,211 --> 00:13:36,182 I'M NOT SURE-- James: YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY 205 00:13:36,182 --> 00:13:39,451 GOT THIS, THIS IS YOUR BIG BRE BREAK. 206 00:13:39,451 --> 00:13:42,721 HEY, GUYS! WELCOME BACK. 207 00:13:42,721 --> 00:13:44,890 WE ARE READY. I'M GOING TO GIVE YOUR WATER 208 00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:46,458 PICTURE AND, JAMES, WHEN YOU CANNOT-- 209 00:13:46,458 --> 00:13:49,562 James: CALL ME CRAIG, PLEASE. 210 00:13:49,562 --> 00:13:51,797 SO GRAB SOME OF THOS BREADSTICKS. 211 00:13:51,797 --> 00:13:54,867 RIGHT. AND YOU WILL PLACE THEM ON 212 00:13:54,867 --> 00:13:57,269 EACH OF THE TABLES. James: OKAY. 213 00:13:57,269 --> 00:13:59,805 BECAUSE SO WHEN YOU COME IN, MONTERO WILL COME HERE, JAMES, 214 00:13:59,805 --> 00:14:05,911 YOU WILL BE OVERHEAR AS HOPE CENTER BACK TO PRISON. 215 00:14:05,911 --> 00:14:08,681 PRISON IS THE QUEUE, MONTERO WILL BE ON THE SIDE AND HE WILL 216 00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:13,219 LOOK UP TO JAMES-- TO CRAIG, SORRY, CRAIG. 217 00:14:13,219 --> 00:14:15,654 IS GOING TO LOOK TO YOU AND YOU'LL GIVE HIM A LOOK. 218 00:14:15,654 --> 00:14:18,691 AND SHE'S THE ONE GOING TO PRISON? 219 00:14:18,691 --> 00:14:20,626 James: NO. I'M NOT GOING TO PRISON. 220 00:14:20,626 --> 00:14:22,695 HIS EX-GIRLFRIEND IS GOING TO PRISON. 221 00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:25,965 BUT I DON'T KNOW THAT HE WAS HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH HER. 222 00:14:25,965 --> 00:14:29,368 James: HANG ON, GOT TO BACK UP. 223 00:14:29,368 --> 00:14:32,771 YOU'RE THE BOSS. YOUR HIS DAUGHTER. 224 00:14:32,771 --> 00:14:35,241 AND I'VE BEEN KEEPING IT A BIG SECRET THAT I'VE BEEN HAVING 225 00:14:35,241 --> 00:14:37,509 AN AFFAIR WITH THIS WOMAN WHO IS NOT GOING TO PRISON. 226 00:14:37,509 --> 00:14:39,645 IS THERE A WORLD WHERE I AM THE SON? 227 00:14:39,645 --> 00:14:42,248 MAYBE THIS WHOLE TIME HE DIDN'T KNOW? 228 00:14:42,248 --> 00:14:45,651 James: PLAYED OUT IN THE SCENE, THAT WOULD BE VERY 229 00:14:45,651 --> 00:14:47,620 POWERFUL. SUBTEXT. 230 00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:51,123 IN DAYTIME WE MOVE VERY QUICKLY SO I ONLY HAVE A CERTAIN 231 00:14:51,123 --> 00:14:52,091 AMOUNT OF TIME TO GET THE SCENE DONE. 232 00:14:52,091 --> 00:14:54,827 I'M SORRY. SPENT OKAY. 233 00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:57,830 LET'S CRACK ON. HERE WE GO. 234 00:14:57,830 --> 00:15:06,639 ROLLING. James: TOO MANY BREAD 235 00:15:06,639 --> 00:15:11,176 BREADSTICKS. OKAY, AND... 236 00:15:11,176 --> 00:15:14,713 ACTION. [BLEEP]. 237 00:15:14,713 --> 00:15:16,915 AND ON WHAT YOU THINK YOU HEARD. 238 00:15:16,915 --> 00:15:20,719 LIKE I SAID, I KNOW WHAT YOU DID. 239 00:15:20,719 --> 00:15:26,458 TO HER. HELPING RICH AND BILL SEND 240 00:15:26,458 --> 00:15:30,696 SHEILA BACK TO PRISON. ARE YOU OKAY? 241 00:15:30,696 --> 00:15:34,133 I'M SORRY! I'M SO SORRY! 242 00:15:34,133 --> 00:15:38,437 ACTION. TWO I DON'T KNOW IF YOU HEARD-- 243 00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:44,343 DAD, LIKE I SAID, I KNOW WHAT YOU DID. 244 00:15:44,343 --> 00:15:47,146 FOR SHEILA? TO HER. 245 00:15:47,146 --> 00:15:52,418 IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN, I PROMISE! 246 00:15:52,418 --> 00:16:00,092 GO OPEN BILL AND RIDGE SEND SHEILA BACK TO PRISON. 247 00:16:00,092 --> 00:16:05,464 [LAUGHTER] PICK UP FROM RIGHT. 248 00:16:05,464 --> 00:16:08,934 ACTION. IT IS A BIG DEAL. 249 00:16:08,934 --> 00:16:13,138 WITH THE THREE OF YOU DID, BECAUSE OF YOU, WE DON'T HAVE TO 250 00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:18,377 WORRY ABOUT SHEILA ANYMORE. THAT 9-TOAD FREAK IS BEHIND BARS 251 00:16:18,377 --> 00:16:23,415 WHERE SHE SHOULD HAVE BEEN TO BEGIN WITH. 252 00:16:23,415 --> 00:16:26,118 WE DON'T EVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HER MAKING PAROLE OR 253 00:16:26,118 --> 00:16:31,223 ESCAPING. BOSS, WHAT CAN I GET YOU THIS 254 00:16:31,223 --> 00:16:33,525 MORNING? THE TIRAMISU IS TO DIE FOR. 255 00:16:33,525 --> 00:16:37,029 I THINK I'M JUST GOING TO DO A CAPPUCCINO, DON'T GO BONKERS 256 00:16:37,029 --> 00:16:39,665 WITH THE WHIPPED CREAM. OKAY, CUT. 257 00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:43,502 LET'S TAKE IT BACK, RESET THE CAPPUCCINOS. 258 00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:54,913 TWO CAPPUCCINOS. [LAUGHTER] 259 00:16:54,913 --> 00:17:03,021 YEAH, YOU KNOW... SO AMAZING. 260 00:17:03,021 --> 00:17:06,392 HE BELIEVED YOU WERE RUNNING STUFF DOWN THERE. 261 00:17:06,392 --> 00:17:10,929 THE TIRAMISU AT THAT IS AMAZING. YOU WERE REALLY DECENT.& 262 00:17:10,929 --> 00:17:13,499 James: I FEEL LIKE WE GOT IT. 263 00:17:13,499 --> 00:17:16,635 GUYS, GUYS, GUYS? DID WE GET IT, CINDY? 264 00:17:16,635 --> 00:17:21,907 WE GOT IT! James: YES! 265 00:17:21,907 --> 00:17:24,243 YES! [APPLAUSE] 266 00:17:24,243 --> 00:17:28,013 YOU GUYS WEREN'T BAD EITHER. James: THANK YOU! 267 00:17:28,013 --> 00:17:32,885 EVERYBODY GIVE IT UP FOR MONTERO AND HIS BIG BREAK, EVERYBODY! 268 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:39,224 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 269 00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:43,762 ♪ ♪ ♪ LOOKING AT THE TABLE ♪ 270 00:17:43,762 --> 00:17:47,166 ♪ POLICIES WHEAT AND WHITE ♪ ♪ YOU LIVING THE LIFE ♪ 271 00:17:47,166 --> 00:17:49,535 ♪ YOU AIN'T LIVE IN RIGHT ♪ ♪ CHAMPAGNE, DRINKING WITH YOUR 272 00:17:49,535 --> 00:17:51,937 FRIENDS ♪ ♪ YOU LIVE IN THE DARK, BOY, I 273 00:17:51,937 --> 00:17:54,706 CANNOT PRETEND ♪ ♪ I'M NOT FAZED, ONLY HERE TO 274 00:17:54,706 --> 00:17:57,743 SEE IN ♪ ♪ IF EVE AIN'T IN THE GARDEN, 275 00:17:57,743 --> 00:17:59,545 YOU KNOW THAT YOU CAN ♪ ♪ , WHEN YOU WANT, CALL ME WHEN 276 00:17:59,545 --> 00:18:03,015 YOU NEED ♪ ♪ CALL ME IN THE MORNING, I'LL 277 00:18:03,015 --> 00:18:04,750 BE ON THE WAY ♪ ♪ CALL ME WHEN YOU WANT, CALL ME 278 00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:07,152 WHEN YOU NEED ♪ ♪ CALL ME UP BY YOUR NAME, I'LL 279 00:18:07,152 --> 00:18:12,191 BE ON THE WAY LIKE ♪ ♪ CALL ME BY YOUR NAME ♪ 280 00:18:12,191 --> 00:18:18,464 ♪ TELL ME YOU LOVE ME ♪ ♪ CALL ME BY YOUR NAME, I DO NOT 281 00:18:18,464 --> 00:18:24,736 CARE IF YOU'RE LYING ♪ James: THANK YOU SO MUCH 282 00:18:24,736 --> 00:18:25,938 FOR HELPING ME GET TO WORK TODAY. 283 00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:28,740 THIS HAS BEEN AN AMAZING TIME. 284 00:18:28,740 --> 00:18:32,311 James: IT'S BEEN A BLAST, THANK YOU. 285 00:18:32,311 --> 00:18:36,949 James: YOU CAN CATCH HIM ON TOUR RIGHT NOW, WE WANT TO SAY A 286 00:18:36,949 --> 00:18:41,019 SPECIAL THANKS TO EVERYONE DOWN AT "THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL!" 287 00:18:41,019 --> 00:18:46,058 WE REALLY FOR REAL SHOT THAT SCENE AND ARE EPISODE ERRORS 288 00:18:46,058 --> 00:18:49,495 APRIL 19TH, HAVE A LOOK FOR IT! SEE IF YOU CAN SPOT US! 289 00:18:49,495 --> 00:18:54,233 WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE OF "LATE LATE SHOW," EVERYBODY! 290 00:18:54,233 --> 00:18:56,268 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 291 00:19:00,572 --> 00:19:07,546 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 292 00:19:07,546 --> 00:19:08,680 ♪ ♪ James: WELCOME BACK, LET'S 293 00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:11,550 MEET OUR GUESTS TONIGHT! SHE IS THE EXECUTIVE PRODUCER OF 294 00:19:11,550 --> 00:19:15,487 "PROM PACKS," PLEASE WELCOME JULIA BOWEN! 295 00:19:15,487 --> 00:19:21,093 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] NICE TO SEE YOU! 296 00:19:21,093 --> 00:19:25,964 HOW ARE YOU? James: HERE'S THE RIDER AND 297 00:19:25,964 --> 00:19:37,075 DIRECTOR OF "A GOOD PERSON," ZACH BRAFF! 298 00:19:37,075 --> 00:19:46,184 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] BECAUSE YOU ARE OVERHEAR! 299 00:19:46,184 --> 00:19:47,419 James: I AM. BLESS YOU FOR BEING HERE, 300 00:19:47,419 --> 00:19:51,323 THANK YOU FOR COMING AND YOU BOTH START IN HUGE SITCOMS, ZACH 301 00:19:51,323 --> 00:19:57,763 YOU WERE IN "SCRUBS," JULIE YOU WERE IN "MODERN FAMILY." 302 00:19:57,763 --> 00:20:03,468 WHEN I MOVED HERE WAS I THINK THE MOMENT WHERE "MODERN FAMILY" 303 00:20:03,468 --> 00:20:07,639 WAS-- IT WAS THE SINGLE BIGGEST COMEDY IN THE WORLD AND I JUST 304 00:20:07,639 --> 00:20:10,776 IMAGINE THAT WHEN A SHOW GETS THAT SUCCESSFUL, YOU MUST HAVE 305 00:20:10,776 --> 00:20:14,212 LOTS OF TRAPPINGS OF LUXURIES AND ALL THESE THINGS, 306 00:20:14,212 --> 00:20:16,448 HELICOPTERS WHERE EVER YOU TO GO. 307 00:20:16,448 --> 00:20:20,485 I WAS SURPRISED TO LEARN THAT YOU AND TY BURRELL STILL SHARED 308 00:20:20,485 --> 00:20:25,390 HER TRAILER. YES, ALL 11 YEARS! 309 00:20:25,390 --> 00:20:29,461 IT WAS A COST-CUTTING MEASURE. I DON'T UNDERSTAND-- IT MADE 310 00:20:29,461 --> 00:20:32,130 PERFECT SENSE. WE GOT SO USED WITH THAT I THINK 311 00:20:32,130 --> 00:20:36,768 HONESTLY WOULD HAVE BEEN WEIRD. IT WAS ONE TRAILER, TWO 312 00:20:36,768 --> 00:20:41,139 BATHROOMS AND TWO LITTLE COUCHES BUT THE WALL BETWEEN THEM WAS 313 00:20:41,139 --> 00:20:48,013 SORT OF THIN. AND SHOULD ANY VAGUE SOUND EMIT 314 00:20:48,013 --> 00:20:54,052 FROM ONE'S BODY, SAY, YOU ARE LIKE SORRY, TIE! 315 00:20:54,052 --> 00:20:59,157 GOOD NEWS IS HE WAS A REALLY LOUD SNORE -ER. 316 00:20:59,157 --> 00:21:01,226 James: I'M SURPRISED IT WASN'T SO GLAMOROUS, IT WAS SUCH 317 00:21:01,226 --> 00:21:04,563 AN AMAZING AND SUCCESSFUL SHOW. WELL, WE SMOKED GOLD EVERY 318 00:21:04,563 --> 00:21:05,831 MORNING. James: HONESTLY WE MOST 319 00:21:05,831 --> 00:21:09,768 RECENTLY SAW YOU WITH YOUR "SCRUBS" COSTAR. 320 00:21:09,768 --> 00:21:16,108 HERE YOU ARE, YOU DID A SUPER BOWL COMMERCIAL WITH 321 00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:22,447 JOHN TRAVOLTA! [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 322 00:21:22,447 --> 00:21:25,884 LIKE THAT'S NOT ENOUGH, YOU SING A SONG FROM "GREECE MOST GO. 323 00:21:25,884 --> 00:21:27,452 HOW WAS IT, HOW DID THIS COME ABOUT? 324 00:21:27,452 --> 00:21:31,857 DID YOU HIT IT OFF? WELL, YES, DONALD AND I HAVE 325 00:21:31,857 --> 00:21:34,326 BEEN DOING A T-MOBILE CAMPAIGN FOR A WHILE AND JOHN TRAVOLTA, 326 00:21:34,326 --> 00:21:38,096 THEY JUST DECIDED WE'RE GOING TO DO A SPOOF OF MOSH TO "GREECE" 327 00:21:38,096 --> 00:21:40,966 AND JOHN TRAVOLTA SAID YES AND WE COULDN'T BELIEVE IT BECAUSE 328 00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:43,368 WE LOVE IT, WE LOVE MUSICAL THEATER AND ALL OF A 329 00:21:43,368 --> 00:21:46,304 SUDDEN THERE WE WERE AND HE'S AMAZING. 330 00:21:46,304 --> 00:21:49,675 HE IS SUCH A NICE MAN AND WE HAVE THE BEST TWO DAYS OF OUR 331 00:21:49,675 --> 00:21:52,511 LIVES SINGING WITH TRAVOLTA. James: DID HE EVER SAY TO 332 00:21:52,511 --> 00:21:57,015 YOU HEY, GUYS, WE SHOULD TAKE THIS ON THE ROAD? 333 00:21:57,015 --> 00:21:59,351 THAT WAS MY DREAM AND WE DID AN INTERVIEW WITH VARIETY JUST 334 00:21:59,351 --> 00:22:02,721 TO PROMOTE THE THING HE SAID TO THE JOURNALIST, YOU KNOW, IN 335 00:22:02,721 --> 00:22:06,925 FRONT OF THE TWO OF US, HE SAID I THINK THE THREE OF US SHOULD 336 00:22:06,925 --> 00:22:08,627 DO A REAL MUSICAL TOGETHER BURIED 337 00:22:08,627 --> 00:22:10,762 WHAT! WE WERE LIKE CAN YOU MAKE 338 00:22:10,762 --> 00:22:14,166 THAT THE HEADLINE OF THE ARTI ARTICLE? 339 00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:15,333 [APPLAUSE] James: OBVIOUSLY YOU ARE 340 00:22:15,333 --> 00:22:17,135 BOTH HUGELY SUCCESSFUL IN YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW THAT WASN'T 341 00:22:17,135 --> 00:22:20,238 ALWAYS THE CASE. A LOT OF ACTORS, YOU WERE 342 00:22:20,238 --> 00:22:23,308 STRUGGLING TO GET YOUR BREAK AND YOU WORKED AT VARIOUS JOBS IN 343 00:22:23,308 --> 00:22:26,244 ONE OF THE THINGS YOU BOTH DID WAS WAIT TABLES IN YOUR CAREERS. 344 00:22:26,244 --> 00:22:31,049 WHEN DID YOU REALIZE, JULIE, THAT YOU COULD STOP WAITING 345 00:22:31,049 --> 00:22:34,686 TABLES IN YOUR CAREER WAS IN A PLACE WHERE YOU COULD LEAVE THAT 346 00:22:34,686 --> 00:22:36,988 BEHIND? JAMES, STILL HAVE THREE SONS 347 00:22:36,988 --> 00:22:41,593 SO I ESSENTIALLY WAIT TABLES ALL THE TIME STILL. 348 00:22:41,593 --> 00:22:44,196 BUT WHERE THEY ACTUALLY PAID AND TIPPED? 349 00:22:44,196 --> 00:22:48,033 I WAS-- I WOULD GO OFF TO DO JOBS. 350 00:22:48,033 --> 00:22:50,035 IT WAS CLASS OF 96, THAT'S HOW OLD I AM. 351 00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:54,039 IT WAS A TV SHOW AND THEY FLEW ME FIRST CLASS TO TORONTO AND I 352 00:22:54,039 --> 00:22:58,176 WAS SO EXCITED, I'VE NEVER FLOWN FIRST CLASS IN MY LIFE AND WE 353 00:22:58,176 --> 00:23:00,746 CAME BACK AND THE TOWN CAR DRIVES YOU TO TAKE IT TO YOUR 354 00:23:00,746 --> 00:23:05,016 APARTMENT AND I SAID NO, TYING MY APRON ON, I'M LIKE IT'S BACK 355 00:23:05,016 --> 00:23:07,819 TO THE RESTAURANT, I WENT RIGHT INTO MY SHIFT. 356 00:23:07,819 --> 00:23:09,354 James: STRAIGHT BACK INTO THE SHIFT? 357 00:23:09,354 --> 00:23:12,157 YEAH. AND I WAS GETTING REALLY GOOD AT 358 00:23:12,157 --> 00:23:14,926 IT. YOU KNOW YOU SHOULD QUIT WAITING 359 00:23:14,926 --> 00:23:20,632 TABLES WHEN YOU GET REALLY GOOD. THE 12 TOP COMES IN, JUST LIKE 360 00:23:20,632 --> 00:23:24,236 COKED OUT AND THEY ARE JULIE, IT'S YOU, AND YOU ARE LIKE I 361 00:23:24,236 --> 00:23:27,839 CAN'T DO THIS. IT'S TIME TO GO. 362 00:23:27,839 --> 00:23:31,443 James: YOU WORKED FOR CASTING DIRECTOR IN LOS ANGELES. 363 00:23:31,443 --> 00:23:34,346 I GOT AN INTERNSHIP, LOTS OF DIFFERENT OFFICES COME ALL OVER 364 00:23:34,346 --> 00:23:37,415 THE FILM BUSINESS AND THEY SENT ME DOWN TO HELP A CASTING 365 00:23:37,415 --> 00:23:39,785 DIRECTOR AND I WAS SO EXCITED, I WAS LIKE I'M GOING TO BE 366 00:23:39,785 --> 00:23:41,186 DISCOVERED, I WILL GET TO SIT IN ON ADDITIONS, WORK THE VIDEO 367 00:23:41,186 --> 00:23:44,055 CAMERA BUT THIS IS MY BIG BREAK AND THEY WALK IN AND AGO AND YOU 368 00:23:44,055 --> 00:23:49,027 JUST THROW AWAY THAT GIANT BOX PLEASE YOU MET IN THE BOX WAS 369 00:23:49,027 --> 00:23:51,863 LIKE THE SIZE OF HIS DESK AND I WALKED IN A VERY WAS LIKE OKAY, 370 00:23:51,863 --> 00:23:54,499 I GUESS I CAN AND OPEN IT AND IT'S FILLED WITH THOUSANDS AND 371 00:23:54,499 --> 00:23:57,903 THOUSANDS OF HEAD SHOTS. James: ACTORS WHO SENT THEM 372 00:23:57,903 --> 00:23:59,104 IN AND THEY WERE LIKE CAN YOU 373 00:23:59,104 --> 00:24:01,173 JUST PUT THAT IN THE DUMPSTER AND TRYING TO BE AN ACTOR THIS 374 00:24:01,173 --> 00:24:06,511 IS THE MOST DEPRESSING THING I'VE EVER SEEN. 375 00:24:06,511 --> 00:24:08,780 SO I TOOK ABOUT-- I TOOK A COUPLE HUNDRED OF THEM COME UP 376 00:24:08,780 --> 00:24:11,149 WITH THEM IN MY BACKPACK, THROUGH THE BOX AWAY, WENT BACK 377 00:24:11,149 --> 00:24:14,719 TO MY LITTLE RENTAL APARTMENT AND I WALLPAPERED MY ENTIRE 378 00:24:14,719 --> 00:24:17,722 HOUSE WITH ALL THE HEAD SHOTS. James: THAT'S BEATABLE! 379 00:24:17,722 --> 00:24:22,093 AT LEAST A COUPLE HUNDRED PEOPLE GOT HONORED. 380 00:24:22,093 --> 00:24:25,030 James: THAT'S A GREAT IDEA! [APPLAUSE] 381 00:24:25,030 --> 00:24:28,967 YOUR BREAK WAS WHEN YOU WERE ADAM SANDLER'S LOVE INTEREST IN 382 00:24:28,967 --> 00:24:33,038 "HAPPY GILMORE." WHAT WAS IT LIKE, WHAT WAS THE 383 00:24:33,038 --> 00:24:34,873 AUDITION PROCESS TO GET THAT ROLE? 384 00:24:34,873 --> 00:24:37,042 IT WASN'T GOOD AT BEING-- I DIDN'T WEAR THESE, I WILL TELL 385 00:24:37,042 --> 00:24:40,111 YOU THAT. I WAS MAYBE WEARING OVERALLS IN 386 00:24:40,111 --> 00:24:44,716 MY MIND TO THESE AUDITIONS AND THERE WERE ALL THESE GIRLS THAT 387 00:24:44,716 --> 00:24:47,152 WERE SO BEAUTIFUL AND WELL QUAFFED AND SHORT SKIRTS AND 388 00:24:47,152 --> 00:24:50,522 THEY KNEW WHAT THEY WERE DOING AND I WAS TERRIFIED SORT OF 389 00:24:50,522 --> 00:24:53,692 SITTING THERE SIGNINGS GOING I'M NEVER GOING TO GET THIS JOB AND 390 00:24:53,692 --> 00:24:58,029 I WALK IN, THIS ONE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN SORT OF SWANS OUT AND I 391 00:24:58,029 --> 00:25:01,099 GOING AND IN MY MIND IT'S ADAM AND THE PRODUCER AND THE 392 00:25:01,099 --> 00:25:04,870 DIRECTOR AND THE PRODUCER AND IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME, BUT THEY 393 00:25:04,870 --> 00:25:07,839 WERE LOOKING SORT OF ACTION AND SHELL-SHOCKED AND I START MY& 394 00:25:07,839 --> 00:25:12,711 READ AND THEY I THINK-- I THINK OF GOD THEY HATE ME, SOMETHING 395 00:25:12,711 --> 00:25:15,146 HORRIBLE IS HAPPENING AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS. 396 00:25:15,146 --> 00:25:18,817 EVENTUALLY I GOT THE JOB AND THEY TOLD ME THAT THE GIRL WHO 397 00:25:18,817 --> 00:25:24,122 HAD JUST SPAWNED OUT IN FRONT OF ME HAD GIVEN THEM THE FULL 398 00:25:24,122 --> 00:25:30,962 SHARON STONE EXPERIENCE AND THAT THEY WERE ABSOLUTELY SHAKEN TO 399 00:25:30,962 --> 00:25:34,900 THEIR CORE AND THAT THEY-- AND TO THEIR CREDIT-- AND I SAID 400 00:25:34,900 --> 00:25:37,636 YOU DID NOT CARE FOR THAT? BECAUSE I WOULD HAVE-- I WOULD 401 00:25:37,636 --> 00:25:41,940 LIKE YOUR DUDES. PUBLIC NO, WE WERE SO HAPPY TO 402 00:25:41,940 --> 00:25:46,778 SEE YOUR FREAKING OVERALLS. James: AND THEIR YOU GO, 403 00:25:46,778 --> 00:25:51,082 AND THAT'S WHAT GOT THE GIG. CONGRATULATIONS, WELL DONE! 404 00:25:51,082 --> 00:25:52,851 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] I'M EXCITED ABOUT THIS, WE GOT 405 00:25:52,851 --> 00:25:55,620 TO TALK ABOUT YOUR NEW FILM, "A GOOD PERSON." 406 00:25:55,620 --> 00:25:57,489 YOU'VE WRITTEN THE MOVIE, YOU HAVE DIRECTED THE MOVIE, IT 407 00:25:57,489 --> 00:26:01,927 STARTS FLORENCE PUGH AND MORGAN FREEMAN. 408 00:26:01,927 --> 00:26:04,863 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] AND IT IS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL FILM. 409 00:26:04,863 --> 00:26:07,299 THANK YOU. James: THIS IS HOW-- I 410 00:26:07,299 --> 00:26:10,902 CAN'T STRESS ENOUGH THIS IS HOW GOOD THE FILM IS. 411 00:26:10,902 --> 00:26:13,872 GOING TO WATCH IT AGAIN WITH MY WIFE TONIGHT. 412 00:26:13,872 --> 00:26:17,475 I HONESTLY BELIEVE YOU'VE MADE SOMETHING VERY PROFOUND, 413 00:26:17,475 --> 00:26:18,743 POWERFUL, UPLIFTING AND EVERYTHING THAT THE WORLD NEEDS 414 00:26:18,743 --> 00:26:20,946 RIGHT NOW. ANYONE WHO DOESN'T KNOW, EXPLAIN 415 00:26:20,946 --> 00:26:25,417 TO US WHAT IT'S ABOUT AND WHY YOU WANTED TO TELL THE STORY. 416 00:26:25,417 --> 00:26:28,586 INITIALLY IT'S ABOUT A CAR ACCIDENT WHERE SOMEONE DIES AND 417 00:26:28,586 --> 00:26:32,991 IT'S ABOUT THE TWO FAMILIES THAT ARE AFFECTED BY THAT CAR 418 00:26:32,991 --> 00:26:35,727 ACCIDENT AND IT STARTS FLORENCE PUGH AND MORGAN FREEMAN AND IT 419 00:26:35,727 --> 00:26:38,263 ULTIMATELY IS ABOUT A FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN TWO PEOPLE THAT NEVER IN 420 00:26:38,263 --> 00:26:41,700 A THOUSAND YEARS WOULD HAVE BECOME FRIENDS BUT BOND OVER 421 00:26:41,700 --> 00:26:44,703 THIS TRAGEDY AND I KNOW THAT SOUNDS QUITE DARK AND IT IS 422 00:26:44,703 --> 00:26:47,672 EMOTIONAL BUT THERE'S A LOT OF HUMOR IN THE MOVIE AS WELL. 423 00:26:47,672 --> 00:26:49,274 James: THERE'S HUMOR AND IT'S UPLIFTING AND I GOT TO KNOW 424 00:26:49,274 --> 00:26:52,978 YOU OVER THE PAST EIGHT YEARS, WE'VE ALWAYS DONE FUN STUFF ON 425 00:26:52,978 --> 00:26:54,245 THE SHOW. WATCHING THIS MOVIE I WAS LIKE 426 00:26:54,245 --> 00:26:57,749 OH, MY GOD, THIS IS EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING THAT WE NEED RIGHT 427 00:26:57,749 --> 00:27:01,219 NOW AND I URGE EVERYBODY TO GO AND CHECK OUT THIS FILM. 428 00:27:01,219 --> 00:27:04,923 IT'S ABSOLUTELY STUNNING. LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT A CLIP FROM 429 00:27:04,923 --> 00:27:07,325 "A GOOD PERSON," WHICH IS INFIELDERS RIGHT NOW. 430 00:27:07,325 --> 00:27:12,163 ALLISON, DON'T GO. THIS WAS A MISTAKE. 431 00:27:12,163 --> 00:27:15,266 NO, NO, IT ISN'T. TRUST ME. 432 00:27:15,266 --> 00:27:18,370 I KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO GET YOUR. 433 00:27:18,370 --> 00:27:23,008 IT'S NEAR IMPOSSIBLE YOU DID IT. DON'T RUN AWAY NOW BECAUSE OF 434 00:27:23,008 --> 00:27:24,709 ME. THERE ARE THOUSANDS OF 435 00:27:24,709 --> 00:27:27,445 MEETINGS, I'LL FIND ANOTHER ONE. YEAH, BUT THIS ONE HAS THE 436 00:27:27,445 --> 00:27:30,181 BEST SNACKS. I WANT TO GO. 437 00:27:30,181 --> 00:27:32,350 YOU'VE MADE IT THIS FAR, I WOULDN'T. 438 00:27:32,350 --> 00:27:36,421 I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE. NOBODY DOES IN THE BEGINNING. 439 00:27:36,421 --> 00:27:43,495 I DON'T WANT TO BE ANYWHERE! James: STICK AROUND. 440 00:27:49,534 --> 00:27:52,003 PROM? 441 00:27:52,003 --> 00:27:58,176 VERY FUNNY. IT'S NOT A JOKE. 442 00:27:58,176 --> 00:28:02,414 WHY IS THIS NOT A JOKE? YOU WANT TO WRITE I GIVE YOU 443 00:28:02,414 --> 00:28:05,417 TRITE BUT ONLY BECAUSE YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND, OKAY? 444 00:28:05,417 --> 00:28:09,954 BUT NO LIMOS, I'M NOT PAYING FOR HAIR AND MAKEUP, THIS IS IT. 445 00:28:09,954 --> 00:28:12,157 AND NO SLOW DANCING. THE ONLY THING I HATE MORE THAN 446 00:28:12,157 --> 00:28:16,227 SLOW DANCING IS THE GENDER WAGE GAP. 447 00:28:16,227 --> 00:28:21,199 YOU REALLY KNOW HOW TO MAKE A BOY FEEL SPECIAL. 448 00:28:21,199 --> 00:28:25,036 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ 449 00:28:25,036 --> 00:28:30,809 James: "PROM PACT" PREMIERS THURSDAY AT 8:00 ON THE DISNEY 450 00:28:30,809 --> 00:28:34,045 CHANNEL AND THE FOLLOWING DAY ON DISNEY+. 451 00:28:34,045 --> 00:28:38,216 CONGRATS ON THE MOVIE, YOU EXECUTIVE PRODUCED. 452 00:28:38,216 --> 00:28:39,751 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] TELL US WHAT IT IS THAT APPEAL 453 00:28:39,751 --> 00:28:42,887 TO YOU ABOUT THIS PROJECT. AT FIRST IT WAS BROUGHT TO ME 454 00:28:42,887 --> 00:28:46,958 IS THIS YOUNG FEMINIST WHO HATES THE PROM AND JUST WANTS TO START 455 00:28:46,958 --> 00:28:48,860 HER LIFE AFTER HIGH SCHOOL AND SKIP THE WHOLE THING AND THAT 456 00:28:48,860 --> 00:28:53,198 WAS ME, SO I RELATED TO THAT BUT THEN I THOUGHT ABOUT ALL THOSE 457 00:28:53,198 --> 00:28:57,035 OL' 80s THESE THAT WERE ABOUT PROMS AND HOW PROBLEMATIC THEY 458 00:28:57,035 --> 00:29:00,371 WERE BUT THE MUSIC WAS SO GOOD SO WE ADDED THIS WHOLE TWIST 459 00:29:00,371 --> 00:29:03,708 WHERE THE THEME TO THE PROM IS THE '80s AND SHE RAILS AGAINST 460 00:29:03,708 --> 00:29:07,011 IT AND THERE'S A GREAT-- MY FAVORITE SCENE, SHE HAS A FULL 461 00:29:07,011 --> 00:29:10,148 TAKEDOWN OF '80s MOVIES WHILE WE ARE ALL LISTENING TO JOHN 462 00:29:10,148 --> 00:29:12,684 HUGHES MUSIC THE ENTIRE TIME BECAUSE WE LOVE IT. 463 00:29:12,684 --> 00:29:16,254 James: GLORIOUS. SPEAKING OF DANCES, YOU HAVE 464 00:29:16,254 --> 00:29:19,491 THREE TEENAGE BOYS AT HOME MUST BE AT AN AGE NOW WHERE THEY ARE 465 00:29:19,491 --> 00:29:24,295 GOING TO PROMS AND SCHOOL DANCES, HOW ARE YOU COPING WITH 466 00:29:24,295 --> 00:29:27,732 THIS CHANGE? THEY ARE STILL PREDRIVING SO 467 00:29:27,732 --> 00:29:35,106 I'M BASICALLY AN O UBER DRIVER. IT'S MOSTLY BAR MITZVAHS. 468 00:29:35,106 --> 00:29:39,210 IT'S A LITTLE SHY OF BAR MITZVAH AGE. 469 00:29:39,210 --> 00:29:42,614 THEY ARE VERY PRODUCTION HEAVY. YOU'RE DROPPING THEM OFF AT 470 00:29:42,614 --> 00:29:45,617 11:00 A.M. IN TARZANA AND PICKING THEM UP AT MIDNIGHT IN 471 00:29:45,617 --> 00:29:47,619 HOLLYWOOD. THERE HAS BEEN A FULL WARDROBE 472 00:29:47,619 --> 00:29:51,322 CHANGE, THEY'VE COME HOME WITH LIKE DESIGNER CLOTHES AND SEEK 473 00:29:51,322 --> 00:29:54,092 OHMIC SNEAKERS AND EVERYTHING IF YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HAPPENED 474 00:29:54,092 --> 00:29:59,597 IN THE INTERMEDIATE TIME. ONCE I PICKED UP MY SON AND HE 475 00:29:59,597 --> 00:30:02,333 HAD READ DRIBBLE, I THOUGHT IT WAS BLOOD, HE GOT IN A FIGHT-- 476 00:30:02,333 --> 00:30:06,204 NO, YOU KNOW THE SONG-- WELL, HE TOLD ME THAT THAT SONG CAME 477 00:30:06,204 --> 00:30:10,708 ON WHERE THEY SAY SHOT, SHOTS AND HE COULDN'T HELP HIMSELF. 478 00:30:10,708 --> 00:30:16,247 THAT'S IT. James: EVERY BODY! 479 00:30:16,247 --> 00:30:19,083 GAP. HE WANTED TO BE PART OF IT SO 480 00:30:19,083 --> 00:30:20,785 BADLY, RUNS TO THE BARTENDER WHO OBVIOUSLY IS NOT GOING TO GIVE A 481 00:30:20,785 --> 00:30:25,156 13-YEAR-OLD SHOTS. FILLS UP GRENADINE INTO LIKE 482 00:30:25,156 --> 00:30:30,228 GLASSES AND MY CHILD IS GOING SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS! 483 00:30:30,228 --> 00:30:33,198 COVERED IN IT, DISGUSTING. James: PROBABLY MORE 484 00:30:33,198 --> 00:30:36,434 DANGEROUS THAN HAVING BOOZE AT THAT POINT. 485 00:30:36,434 --> 00:30:37,769 DEFINITELY. James: I GOT ALL THIS TO 486 00:30:37,769 --> 00:30:42,740 LOOK FORWARD TO. ZACH, YOU RECENTLY DIRECTED AN 487 00:30:42,740 --> 00:30:46,277 EPISODE OF "SHRINKING" STARRING HARRISON FORD. 488 00:30:46,277 --> 00:30:49,080 YES. [APPLAUSE] 489 00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:51,482 James: I'M SURE YOU MUST'VE BEEN AN INDIANA JONES FAN 490 00:30:51,482 --> 00:30:55,720 WHAT WAS IT LIKE DIRECTING HARRISON FORD? 491 00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:59,090 I WAS VERY INTIMIDATED BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, HE IS WHO HE 492 00:30:59,090 --> 00:31:01,326 IS IN ONE OF THE FIRST THINGS TO HAPPEN IS HE SET I WANT TO TAKE 493 00:31:01,326 --> 00:31:04,696 YOUR MY GOLF CART AND GO TALK ON ONE OF THE SETS AND TALK ABOUT 494 00:31:04,696 --> 00:31:08,967 THE SCENE AND I WAS VERY, VERY NERVOUS BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE 495 00:31:08,967 --> 00:31:12,170 ANY SMALL TALK PREPPED. USUALLY YOU HAVE A LITTLE SMALL 496 00:31:12,170 --> 00:31:15,173 TALK READY TO GO BUT WE JUST ALL OF A SUDDEN INSTANTLY WERE IN 497 00:31:15,173 --> 00:31:18,810 THIS GOLF CART DRIVING AROUND THE WARNER BROS. LOT ONE OF THE 498 00:31:18,810 --> 00:31:21,646 TOURIST TRAMS BECAUSE THEY RUN TOURS, IT GOES BY IT IS DRIVING 499 00:31:21,646 --> 00:31:26,551 HE KIND OF LOOKS AWAY AND I SAID DO YOU EVER LOOK AT THE TRAMS 500 00:31:26,551 --> 00:31:29,454 AND WAIVE HE SAYS, NO, NO, I ALWAYS LOOK AWAY AND THEN 501 00:31:29,454 --> 00:31:35,360 THERE'S A PAUSE UNDERGOES WHAT I DO FEEL BAD ABOUT IT. 502 00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:37,195 [LAUGHTER] James: LISTEN, BLESS YOU 503 00:31:37,195 --> 00:31:39,964 BOTH FOR BEING HERE. BEST OF LUCK WITH BOTH OF YOUR 504 00:31:39,964 --> 00:31:42,634 PROJECTS, THEY ARE ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT. 505 00:31:42,634 --> 00:31:46,571 LET IS IN GERMAN, JULIA BOWEN, ZACH BRAFF! 506 00:31:46,571 --> 00:31:50,275 WE GOT STAND UP WHEN WE COME BACK! 507 00:31:50,275 --> 00:31:52,343 DON'T GO ANYWHERE! 508 00:31:59,217 --> 00:32:06,391 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 509 00:32:06,391 --> 00:32:07,759 ♪ ♪ James: WELCOME BACK! 510 00:32:07,759 --> 00:32:10,228 I'M SO EXCITED FOR THE GUEST WE HAVE COMING UP ON THE SHOW THIS 511 00:32:10,228 --> 00:32:13,097 WEEK, KEVIN BACON IS GOING TO BE HERE, KAREN SEDGWICK, 512 00:32:13,097 --> 00:32:16,968 JEFF GOLDBLUM, OWEN WILSON, WE'VE GOT MUSIC FROM JIMMY 513 00:32:16,968 --> 00:32:21,439 ALLEN, STAND UP FROM DUSTIN NICKERSON, PLUS WE ARE GOING TO 514 00:32:21,439 --> 00:32:23,508 PLAY SPILL YOUR GUTS OR FILL YOUR GUTS WITH CHRIS PINE AND 515 00:32:23,508 --> 00:32:28,513 HUGH GRANT! YOU DO NOT WANT TO MISS IT! 516 00:32:28,513 --> 00:32:31,382 THE STAND UP, MORE FROM MORVIN SPLAVERSBY! 517 00:32:31,382 --> 00:32:33,451 YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS IT! ♪ ♪ 518 00:32:42,393 --> 00:32:47,899 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 519 00:32:47,899 --> 00:32:49,033 ♪ ♪ James: WELCOME BACK! 520 00:32:49,033 --> 00:32:51,536 OUR NEXT THIS IS A BRILLIANT STAND-UP MEETING YOU WILL 521 00:32:51,536 --> 00:32:53,604 RECOGNIZE FROM STRANGER THINGS AND MORE RECENTLY HIS STARRING 522 00:32:53,604 --> 00:32:58,376 ROLE IN JOHN WICK 4, HE HAS AN INCREDIBLE HOT ON MY PODCAST, 523 00:32:58,376 --> 00:33:03,381 YOU CAN CATCH THEM LIVE AT THE HEART CHAKRA FUNNY PEOPLE IN 524 00:33:03,381 --> 00:33:08,152 HIGHLAND PARK ON JULY 2ND, 2024, PLEASE WELCOME THE OUTRAGEOUSLY 525 00:33:08,152 --> 00:33:12,123 TALENTED MORVIN SPLAVERSBY! [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 526 00:33:12,123 --> 00:33:20,765 IS A COMU 527 00:33:20,765 --> 00:33:29,741 HEY, HOW ARE YOU DOING? HOW ARE YOU GUYS DOING? 528 00:33:29,741 --> 00:33:34,645 [LAUGHS] YEAH, SO I GREW UP LIKE MOST OF 529 00:33:34,645 --> 00:33:41,652 YOU, AND YOU KNOW, I WAS LIKE-- WHEN I WAS SMALL OR I WAS DOING 530 00:33:41,652 --> 00:33:43,421 STUFF BUT A LOT OF PEOPLE WAS DOING WHEN THERE WERE SMALL SO 531 00:33:43,421 --> 00:33:47,158 I'M NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT THAT BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, WE ALREADY 532 00:33:47,158 --> 00:33:50,161 KNOW WHAT THAT IS. BUT WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER AND I 533 00:33:50,161 --> 00:33:53,164 WAS A BIT TALLER, OBVIOUSLY, THAT'S WHEN THINGS START TO GET 534 00:33:53,164 --> 00:33:54,832 REALLY CRAZY. I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY OF YOU 535 00:33:54,832 --> 00:33:57,969 GUYS EVER DRINK A GLASS OF MILK AND BEEN LIKE "THAT WASN'T A 536 00:33:57,969 --> 00:34:02,240 GOOD IDEA." SO I DID THAT A LOT. 537 00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:06,444 GREW UP OUTSIDE OF NEW JERSEY, YOU KNOW, IT'S A GOOD PLACE TO 538 00:34:06,444 --> 00:34:09,547 GROW UP. IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN TO 539 00:34:09,547 --> 00:34:11,215 NEW JERSEY AND YOU'VE EVER GROWN UP THERE, YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S 540 00:34:11,215 --> 00:34:17,422 LIKE, RIGHT MAKE NO? OKAY. 541 00:34:17,422 --> 00:34:20,391 BUT YOU KNOW, IT WAS GREAT, I WENT INTO MANHATTAN ALL THE 542 00:34:20,391 --> 00:34:23,861 TIME, I WAS GOING IN, IT WAS THE '70s, I WAS GOING ALL THE 543 00:34:23,861 --> 00:34:27,432 TIME, LIKE IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. THAT HATTON AND THE APOSTASY 544 00:34:27,432 --> 00:34:31,436 70s, YOU KNOW HOW THAT WAS, IT WAS LIKE-- YOU KNOW I'M SAYING? 545 00:34:31,436 --> 00:34:32,937 '70s. ALL RIGHT, SO ANYWAYS-- BUT 546 00:34:32,937 --> 00:34:37,475 HERE'S THE THING. IF YOU'RE GOING TO GO INTO A 547 00:34:37,475 --> 00:34:42,380 CITY, RIGHT MAKE YOU KNOW? JUST GO THERE. 548 00:34:42,380 --> 00:34:43,881 YOU KNOW? SOME PEOPLE ARE THERE, THAT WAS 549 00:34:43,881 --> 00:34:45,683 GOOD LOOK I'M GOING TO GOING TO THE CITY AND THEN YOU'RE LIKE 550 00:34:45,683 --> 00:34:48,252 WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE? YOU KNOW? 551 00:34:48,252 --> 00:34:54,759 I'M GOING TO GO SOMEWHERE AND THEN YOU-- OKAY. 552 00:34:54,759 --> 00:35:05,303 [LAUGHTER] YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S 553 00:35:05,303 --> 00:35:10,374 GOING ON THESE DAYS WITH THE CRYPTO, THE CRYPTO GOING ON. 554 00:35:10,374 --> 00:35:13,478 THERE'S SO MUCH CRYPTO GOING ON, I DON'T EVEN KNOW TO DO WITH IT. 555 00:35:13,478 --> 00:35:14,846 SOMETIMES YOU GET A CRYPTO PERSON IN THERE LIKE I GOT SOME 556 00:35:14,846 --> 00:35:18,916 CRYPTO AND REALLY I DON'T UNDERSTAND, WHY ARE SO PEOPLE-- 557 00:35:18,916 --> 00:35:26,691 PEOPLE SO INTERESTED IN MOMMIES INMAC YOU'VE EVER BEEN WALKING 558 00:35:26,691 --> 00:35:30,795 DOWN AND I'LL DO LIKE THIS IS TOO LONG? 559 00:35:30,795 --> 00:35:35,766 YOU EVER DONE THAT INMAC [LAUGHTER] 560 00:35:35,766 --> 00:35:36,934 IT'S LIKE THERE'S NO ESCAPE, YOU KNOW? 561 00:35:36,934 --> 00:35:40,071 ACROSS THE HALFWAY POINT AND YOU'RE LIKE IT'S EQUAL EITHER 562 00:35:40,071 --> 00:35:50,715 WAY, IT IS STILL TOO LONG. [LAUGHTER] 563 00:35:50,715 --> 00:35:55,019 YOU KNOW, WHEN I WAS-- HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE EVER-- YOU GUYS 564 00:35:55,019 --> 00:35:59,857 EVER-- HAVE YOU GUYS EVER-- YOU KNOW LIKE WHEN YOU-- YOU 565 00:35:59,857 --> 00:36:02,460 KNOW WHEN YOU'RE DOING IT AND YOU LIKE I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS 566 00:36:02,460 --> 00:36:04,095 HAPPENING? YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? 567 00:36:04,095 --> 00:36:07,665 AND A LIQUID GET TO DO THIS ALL THE TIME, LIKE YOU KNOW, 568 00:36:07,665 --> 00:36:10,067 OBVIOUSLY IF IT'S CONSENSUAL, YOU KNOW HOW YOU'RE DOING THAT? 569 00:36:10,067 --> 00:36:13,237 AND YOU LIKE THIS IS INSANE, YOU EVER STOP IN THE MIDDLE LIKE 570 00:36:13,237 --> 00:36:15,706 THIS IS CRAZY-- THIS IS CRAZY, AND THEY'RE LIKE YEAH, THIS IS 571 00:36:15,706 --> 00:36:20,177 PRETTY WEIRD. I LOVE IT. 572 00:36:20,177 --> 00:36:25,182 AND I STARTED DRIVING WHEN I WAS 16 AND I WAS LIKE I LOVE CARS, 573 00:36:25,182 --> 00:36:27,051 YOU KNOW? HOW MANY PEOPLE LOVE CARS? 574 00:36:27,051 --> 00:36:32,523 ANYBODY LOVE CARS? [APPLAUSE] 575 00:36:32,523 --> 00:36:36,027 [LAUGHS] YEAH, ME TOO. 576 00:36:36,027 --> 00:36:43,034 YOU EVER BEEN-- IF YOU EVER BEEN IN BED, YOU KNOW? 577 00:36:43,034 --> 00:36:46,203 YOUR LIKE IS THERE SOMETHING UNDERNEATH THIS THING MIGHT HAVE 578 00:36:46,203 --> 00:36:47,672 YOU EVER THOUGHT THAT? YOU KNOW, YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH TO 579 00:36:47,672 --> 00:36:51,342 KNOW THAT THERE'S NOT, BUT YOUR LIKE MAYBE THERE COULD BE 580 00:36:51,342 --> 00:36:53,344 SOMETHING OTHER-- UNDER THEIR OR WHATEVER? 581 00:36:53,344 --> 00:36:56,180 AND MAYBE YOU DID TOO MUCH OF THE WEEDS, RIGHT? 582 00:36:56,180 --> 00:36:59,016 YOU DID TOO MUCH OF THE WEEDS, IF LEGAL HERE. 583 00:36:59,016 --> 00:37:02,019 IF NOT LEGAL WHERE I COME FROM BUT IT'S LEGAL HERE. 584 00:37:02,019 --> 00:37:04,155 ANYONE DO TOO MUCH OF THE WEEDS, TOO MUCH OF THE LSD, HAVE YOU 585 00:37:04,155 --> 00:37:09,694 EVER DONE SO MUCH LSD AND SO MUCH WEEDS UNDER JUST LIKE I'M 586 00:37:09,694 --> 00:37:11,228 PARANOID, HAVE YOU EVER DONE THAT? 587 00:37:11,228 --> 00:37:14,966 THAT'S NOT A GOOD THING TO DO, ESPECIALLY YOU OF-- IF YOU ARE 588 00:37:14,966 --> 00:37:17,568 AFRAID OF WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED OR WHATEVER. 589 00:37:17,568 --> 00:37:20,438 ANYWAYS, SO I WANT TO TELL YOU A STORY, THIS IS A STORY ABOUT A 590 00:37:20,438 --> 00:37:22,573 FRIEND OF MINE, I USED TO GO OVER TO A FRIEND OF MINE HOUSE 591 00:37:22,573 --> 00:37:25,977 AND DO ALL KINDS OF CRAZY STUFF LIKE THIS VIDEO GAME STUFF LIKE 592 00:37:25,977 --> 00:37:27,545 WHEN YOU'RE LOOKING AT IT UNTIL IT WHAT YOU GUYS DOING AND HE'S 593 00:37:27,545 --> 00:37:30,314 LIKE I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING. YEAH, BUT PEOPLE ARE DOING STUFF 594 00:37:30,314 --> 00:37:32,984 ALL THE TIME. ALL MY COMEDY IS ABOUT WHAT 595 00:37:32,984 --> 00:37:36,487 PEOPLE ARE DOING SO I'M KIND OF LIKE WHAT ARE THE PEOPLE DOING 596 00:37:36,487 --> 00:37:41,993 COMIC OR WHATEVER, NINTENDO 128, NINTENDO 65, WHATEVER, ALL OF 597 00:37:41,993 --> 00:37:46,731 THEM. MY FAVORITE GROUP, MY BLANK 187. 598 00:37:46,731 --> 00:37:55,339 LEVEL 47, YOU KNOW-- ANYWAYS, I'M WATCHING SOMEONE, RIGHT? 599 00:37:55,339 --> 00:38:00,544 WATCHING BECAUSE I THOUGHT-- AND I'M JUST LIKE YOU KNOW WHAT? 600 00:38:00,544 --> 00:38:04,215 SCREW YOU. WITH WHAT? 601 00:38:04,215 --> 00:38:10,755 AND HE'S LIKE I GOT YOU, RIGHT? SO ANYWAYS-- I REALLY DO 602 00:38:10,755 --> 00:38:12,857 APPRECIATE YOUR TIME, I LOVE L.A., I'M GOING TO GET HER A 603 00:38:12,857 --> 00:38:15,593 LITTLE BIT MORE. CHECK ME OUT A LITTLE BIT MORE 604 00:38:15,593 --> 00:38:20,097 NEXT YEAR, OKAY, SEE YOU! [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 605 00:38:20,097 --> 00:38:25,603 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! MORVIN SPLAVERSBY! 606 00:38:25,603 --> 00:38:29,674 THANK YOU SO MUCH! WILL BE RIGHT BACK, EVERYBODY! 607 00:38:42,687 --> 00:38:52,396 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 608 00:38:52,396 --> 00:38:53,664 ♪ ♪ James: THANK YOU SO MUCH! 609 00:38:53,664 --> 00:38:56,534 TOMORROW NIGHT, JEFF GOLDBLUM, OWEN WILSON ARE GOING TO BE HERE 610 00:38:56,534 --> 00:39:01,405 WE HAVE MASTER MENTALIST LIOR SUCHARD FOR THE LAST TIME, 611 00:39:01,405 --> 00:39:04,308 WE HOPE YOU'LL JOIN US US, REGGIE, TAKE US HOME! 612 00:39:04,308 --> 00:39:06,377 ♪ ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]