THE LATE LATE SHOW WOO! ♪ THE LATE LATE SHOW-OH-HO
THE LATE LATE SHOW-OH-OH! ♪ IT'S THE LATE LATE SHOW
STOP IT! GOOD EVENING.
WELCOME TO "THE LATE LATE SHOW." HOPE YOU HAD A PLEASANT DAY.
WE SO APPRECIATE YOU BEING HERE WITH US RIGHT NOW.
WHAT HAPPENED? YEAH, WELL, YOU KNOW, JUST BE
AWARE. YEAH?
LET'S MEET OUR GUESTS ON THE SHOW TONIGHT, HE'S A VERY FUNNY
ACTOR, WRITER, AND PRODUCER YOU KNOW FROM "HORRIBLE BOSSES,"
"FIST FIGHT" AND "IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA,"
THE MIGHTY, THE GLORIOUS, CHARLIE DAY!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] CHARLIE, HOW ARE YOU?
>> PRETTY GOOD. YOU WANT TO HANG OUT AND DO A TV
SHOW THING LATER? >> James: ME AND YOU?
YEAH. >> James: WHAT SORT OF TIME?
YOU KNOW, WITHIN THE HOUR OR SO.
I GOTTA RUN. >> James: UM, WHAT DO YOU
MEAN? HOW --
>> DO YOU WANT ME TO, LIKE, I'LL COME OUT THERE AND WE'LL HAVE A
CONVERSATION OR SOMETHING. >> James: LET ME JUST CHECK.
I'LL SEND YOU A TEXT. >> I'LL BE IN HERE!
>> James: CHARLIE DAY, EVERYBODY!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] SHE'S A SIX-TIME EMMY NOMINATED
ACTRESS YOU KNOW FROM HER BRILLIANT RUN ON "VEEP," THE
CHARMING, THE TALENTED ANNA KLUMSKY!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ANNA!
>> HELLO! HI!
>> James: HOW ARE YOU? GOOD.
HOW ARE YOU? >> James: I AM VERY, VERY
WELL. I LOVE THIS OUTFIT.
>> THANK YOU! >> James: I FEEL YOU SHOULD
WEAR MORE OFF THE SHOULDER STUFF.
>> WHY NOT? >> James: I CAN'T GET ENOUGH
OF IT. >> IT'S 2022.
>> James: CORRECT. I WANT THAT SLEEVE TO BE CUT
OFF OF YOU BY THE TIME WE SEE EACH OTHER IN PERSON.
>> James: IT WOULD LOOK AMAZING.
>> I WOULD LOOK AMAZING. EVERYONE NEEDS TO SEE THAT
SHOULDER. >> James: I'M GOING TO DO
THAT. WHICH SHOULDER, LEFT OR RIGHT?
>> WHICH DO YOU THINK IS YOUR BET SHOULDER?
>> Reggie: IT'S -- IT'S YOUR LEFT.
ANNA KLUMSKY, EVERYBODY! AND LATER ON, WE HAVE A
PERFORMANCE FROM BASTILLE. YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS THAT!
HEY HEY HEYO, HEY HEY HAY-O, HEY HEY HEYO-HEY HEYO.
HEY HEY HEYO. HAY HEY HEYO.
WELL, IT'S TIME FOR THE NEWS, [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
TENSIONS ARE STILL HIGH ALONG THE RUSSIAN-UKRAINIAN BORDER.
BUT THIS MORNING, VLADIMIR PUTIN SAI THAT MOSCOW IS READY FOR
TALKS WITH NATO. PUTIN SAYS RUSSIA IS READY TO
DISCUSS "CONFIDENCE-BUILDING MEASURES."
I LIKE THAT PUTIN SAYS HE NEEDS MORE CONFIDENCE.
LIKE HE'S A GUY WHO WEARS A T-SHIRT INTO THE HOTEL HOT TUB
OR SOMETHING. CONFIDENCE- BUILDING MEASURES.
SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING WHERE A DIPLOMAT GOES DON'T WORRY, THIS
HAPPENS TO A LOT OF NATIONS. IT'S PROBABLY STRESS AT WORK.
LET'S JUST HOLD EACH OTHER. SERIOUSLY, WHAT ARE CONFIDENCE
BUILDING MEASURES? TRUST FALLS AND STUFF?
IS PUTIN GOING TO BE LIKE, JOE, ARE YOU READY TO CATCH ME?
JOE, PUT ICE CREAM DOWN. YOU READY TO CATCH, OKAY?
I SWEAR TO GOD, JOE, YOU BETTER CATCH.
[ LAUGHTER ] IN OTHER NEWS, DONALD TRUMP'S
LONGTIME ACCOUNTING FIRM HAS CUT TIES WITH HIM AND THE REST OF
THE TRUMP ORGANIZATION. THE FIRM ALSO SAID IT COULD NO
LONGER STAND BEHIND A DECADE OF FINANCIAL STATEMENTS, CALLING
THEM UNRELIABLE. GOOD OR THEM, STANDING UP AND
DOING THE RIGHT THING TEN YEARS TOO LATE.
[ LAUGHTER ] WHAT NEW INFORMATION COULD HAVE
COME TO LIGHT RIGHT NOW? WERE THEY LIKE
[REALIZING] WAIT A MINUTE...
TRUMP ORGANIZATION? DOES THAT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO
WITH DONALD TRUMP? WHAT?!
MEANWHILE, EVERYBODY HERE IN LOS ANGELES
IS STILL BUZZING ABOUT THE RAMS SUPER BOWL WIN ON SUNDAY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] YEAH.
LEBRON JAMES EVEN POSTED A TWEET SUGGESTING HIS OWN IDEA FOR A
CHAMPIONSHIP PARADE. HE WROTE
WE, DODGERS AND RAMS SHOULD ALL DO A JOINT PARADE TOGETHER.
YOU CAN'T REQUEST A PARADE FOR YOURSELF, AND I KNOW THIS FOR A
FACT, I TRIED. [ LAUGHTER ]
TRUST ME, LeBRON, YOU CAN'T. [ LAUGHTER ]
BUT I DO AGREE, WE SHOULD CELEBRATE ALL OF THE ELITE
ATHLETIC SQUADS IN L.A. - THE -- THEY DIDN'T GET TO HAVE A
PARADE, LIKE THE RAMS, THE DODGERS, THE LAKERS,
AND OF COURSE, "THE LATE LATE SHOW" CURLING TEAM.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] WE'RE ALL WINNERS.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
I THINK THIS IS A GOOD IDEA THEY SHOULD ALL DO A PARADE.
THE LAKERS WON THEIR CHAMPIONSHIP, THERE WASN'T FANS
THERE. >> NO, IT WAS DURING THE BUBBLE.
I LOVE THIS IDEA. I DEFINITELY THINK THE LAKERS
WHO ARE CURRENTLY, LIKE, IN TENTH PLACE IN THE WEST, TWO
YEARS REMOVED FROM WINNING THEIR CHAMPIONSHIP, SHOULD HAVE TO GO
OUT THERE WITH THE WORLD CHAMP ONE RAMS AND DODGERS AND SIT
NEXT TO THEM WHILE, ONCE AGAIN, THEY ARE IN TENTH PLACE IN THEIR
DIVISION. [ LAUGHTER ]
TWO SONIC THE HEDGE HOG MOVIES HAVE COME OUT SINCE THEY'VE WON
THEIR CHAMPIONSHIP, AND I, FOR ONE, WOULD LIKE TO SEE, AGAIN,
THE TENTH PLACE LOS ANGELES LAKERS OUT THERE NEXT TO TWO
ACTUAL WORLD CHAMPIONS LIKE, THANK, WE DID IT.
WE DID DO IT BACK WHEN ALL OF YOU WERE WATCHING TIGER KING,
STILL, WE WON A CHAMPIONSHIP. EVERYONE WAS PLAYING ANIMAL
CROSSING AND BAKING SOURDOUGH LOAVES OF PREYED AND WE WON THE
CHAMPIONSHIP AND, NOW, TWO YEARS LATER, WE'RE HAVING A PARADE.
I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THEM. [ APPLAUSE ]
>> James: ALTHOUGH, I WOULD SAY,
IF IT DID HAPPEN, THE HISTORIC EVENT WOULD BE THE BIGGEST
THREEWAY HELD IN LA SINCE VALENTINE'S DAY AT GUILLERMO'S.
[ LAUGHTER ] BUT CELEBRATIONS ARE ALREADY
UNDERWAY HERE IN LOS ANGELES. EARLIER TODAY, THE FAMOUS
HOLLYWOOD SIGN WAS TEMPORARILY CHANGED TO SAY RAMS HOUSE.
AND IN KEEPING WITH TRADITION HERE IN L.A., THAT HOUSE IS A
TWO-BED, ONE-BATH, TEAR-DOWN THAT COSTS NINE MILLION DOLLARS.
[ LAUGHTER ] THE SIGN WILL STAY UP THROUGH
WEDNESDAY BECAUSE THIS IS LOS ANGELES AND
WE CAN'T PRETEND TO CARE ABOUT SPORTS ANY LONGER THAN THAT.
MOVING ON, THE OSCARS HAVE ANNOUNCED THAT THEY WILL GIVE
TWITTER USERS A VOTE DURING THE AWARDS CEREMONY.
IT'S TRUE, PEOPLE CAN VOTE ON THEIR FAVORITE FILMS THAT WERE
RELEASED IN 2021 - EVEN IF THE FILM WASN'T NOMINATED FOR AN
OSCAR. THE FILM WITH THE MOST VOTES
WILL BE RECOGNIZED DURING THE BROADCAST.
...IT'S "SPIDER-MAN." [ APPLAUSE ]
IT'S GOING TO BE SPIDER-MAN, IT'S THE NEW SPIDER-MAN.
CALL OFF THE VOTE. IT'S THE NEW SPIDER-MAN.
ARE THEY GIVEN A SHORT LIST TO VOTE FOR OR CAN YOU VOTE FOR ANY
FILM. >> I THINK YOU CAN VOTE FOR
ANYTHING. >> James: WE HAVE TO START A
MOVEMENT THAT IT'S "JACKASS." SHOULDN'T WE DO THAT?
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] THAT'S THE BEST OUTCOME IN THIS
IS EVERYBODY GOES, NO, IT'S "JACKASS 2.0".
BECAUSE THE IDEA OF SEEING SIEVEO AND JOHNNY KNOXVILLE ON
STAGE FOR THE OSCARS WOULD BE AMAZING.
THIS IS TRUE TWITTER USERS WILL GET TO PRESENT AN AWARD.
I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL NEXT YEAR, WHEN GLENN CLOSE IS PRESENTED
WITH HER LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT OSCAR FROM @DONKEY LORD69.
[ LAUGHTER ] HOW DOES THE VOTE WORK?
YIN ONE KNOW? IS IT THE MOST RETWEETS OR
WHATEVER? >> THERE'S AN OSCAR HASHTAG AND
THEY COUNT THE VOTE THAT WAY. >> James: WE SHOULD MAKE A
PUSH FOR JACKASS ON THIS, GUYS. SHOULDN'T WE?
>> ABSOLUTELY WE SHOULD, YEAH. >> James: OR THIS IS OUR
CHANCE TO GET CLIFFORD THE BIG RED DOG AT THE OSCARS.
[ LAUGHTER ] [ APPLAUSE ]
AGAIN, DON'T WANT TO BE A BROKEN RECORD, THE COLOR IS IRRELEVANT.
[ LAUGHTER ] IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE RED.
DOESN'T NEED TO BE RED. THE LARGENESS IS THE TAKEAWAY.
NO ONE SEES A DOG OF THAT SIZE AND COMES BACK AND SAYS, I'M I'E
JUST SEEN A RED DOG. [ LAUGHTER ]
THEY'RE TRYING TO HAVE THEIR CAKE AND EAT IT THERE.
IT'S ONE OR THE OTHER. IT'S BIG OR IT'S RED.
BOTH ARE UNIQUE, YOU CAN'T DO BOTH, YOU JUST CAN'T.
>> SHOULD BE JUST CLIFFORD, THE BIG, BIG DOG.
>> James: YEAH. CLIFFORD THE [ BLEEP ] BIG DO.
[ LAUGHTER ] [ APPLAUSE ]
DID YOU SEE A FILM THIS YEAR THAT SHOULD BE NOMINATED FOR
BEST PICTURE? >> Reggie: ROANOKE.
IS THAT A FILM? >> James: IS THAT A FILM?
I THINK I'M UNDERSTANDING WHY IT WAS OVERLOOKED FOR BEST PICTURE.
MOVING ON, A ZOO IN STAFFORDSHIRE, ENGLAND HAS COME
UP WITH A RATHER UNUSUAL WAY TO ENCOURAGE THEIR MONKEYS TO MATE.
THEY ACTUALLY HIRED A MARVIN GAYE IMPERSONATOR TO SERENADE
THE MONKEYS. WHAT A GREAT GIG YOU GET TO
SPEND YOUR DAYS SINGING MARVIN GAYE SONGS AND WATCHING MONKEYS
HAVE SEX??? [ LAUGHTER ]
IT'S A VERY SPECIFIC JOB DESCRIPTION.
I MEAN, IMAGINE BEING THE MARVIN GAYE IMPERSONATOR IN
STAFFORDSHIRE, ENGLAND WHO DIDN'T GET THIS JOB.
[ LAUGHTER ] CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT?
WHAT'S ON YOUR PERFECT ROMANCE PLAY LIST?
>> I LIKE THAT FADE INTO YOU SONG BY MAZZIE STAR.
YOU KNOW THAT ONE? ♪ FADE INTO YOU...
THAT ONE? >> James: WELL, I'M TURNED
OFF. [ LAUGHTER ]
WHAT ABOUT YOU, NICK, WHAT DO YOU PUT ON?
CONAN'S CONAN'S -- [ LAUGHTER ]
>> I HAVE TALKED WAY TOO OFTEN, AND SO HAVE YOU, ABOUT MY LOVE
LIFE, AND MY WIFE HAS HAD IT WITH THIS CONVERSATION.
>> James: TALK ME THROUGH THE CONVERSATION.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> WELL, I MEAN, IT LITERALLY
CAME UP YESTERDAY ON VALENTINE'S DAY BECAUSE YOU BROUGHT UP MY
SEX LIFE. >> James: YEP.
WITH HER YESTERDAY. >> James: YEP.
AND I'M, LIKE, I HAVE TO WATCH THE SHOWDOWN TO SEE WHAT
IT LOOKS LIKE BEFORE IT GOES OUT INTO THE UNIVERSE.
SHE SAID WHY DOES JAMES KEEP TALKING ABOUT US?
AND I HAD NO ANSWER FOR IT. >> James: YOU MADE A MISTAKE
BY WATCHING THIS WITH ANYONE. [ LAUGHTER ]
WELL, WE'LL NEVER DO IT AGAIN, I PROMISE YOU THAT.
WHAT YOU GET UP TO -- WHAT HAPPENED TO THE SEX SWING?
>> WE'RE SAVING IT. >> James: I THOUGHT IT WAS FOR
VALENTINES. >> IT WAS.
WE HAD A COUPLE THINGS GOING ON AND IT GOT A LITTLE COMPLICATED.
>> James: SHOULDN'T DO THAT WITH NICK THEN.
YESTERDAY WHAT YOU HAD ON VALENTINES WAS BETTER THAN WHAT
HAPPENED. THE SHOW BOUGHT YOU, WE WERE
GOING TO REPLACE YOUR CHAIR WITH A SEX SWING.
[ LAUGHTER ] AND IT WAS GOING TO BE HANGING
FROM THE ROOF, AND YOUR LEGS WERE GOING TO BE UP IN, LIKE --
SO, AND THAT WASN'T MY IDEA. SO IT'S NOT JUST ME THAT'S
INTRIGUED. BY YOUR CLEARLY FEROCIOUS SEXUAL
APPETITE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> IF IT MAKES YOU HAPPIER DURING THE MONOLOGUE, I GUESS --
I GUESS I'LL HAVE NO -- >> James: YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE
IN A SEX SWING. I WAS NEVER INTRIGUED ABOUT YOUR
LOVE LIFE WHEN YOU HAD SHORT HAIR.
NOW THAT YOU'VE GROWN LONG HAIR IT MAKES ME THINK THAT YOU ARE A
FREAK. >> IT -- IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE.
>> James: YOU'VE FOUND IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE.
DO YOU FEEL MORE VIRILE WHEN YOU WATCH YOURSELF MAKE LOVE?
[ LAUGHTER ] I'M GOING TO STOP, NICK, WE'RE
GOING TO MOVE ON. HAS EVERYBODY SEEN THIS?
TO CELEBRATE HER DIAMOND JUBILEE, QUEEN ELIZABETH IS
RELEASING HER VERY OWN SPARKLING WINE.
THE BOTTLE FEATURES DESIGNS INSPIRED BY HER CORONATION ROBE,
HERE IT IS HERE, AND WHAT'S MOST IMPRESSIVE IS THAT THE QUEEN
LITERALLY STOMPED THE GRAPES HERSELF.
[ LAUGHTER ] YOU HEAR THOSE FOOTSTEPS,
BUZZBALLZ? IT'S ANOTHER WOMAN-OWNED ADULT
BEVERAGE COMING AROUND THE CORNER.
[ LAUGHTER ] HAVE WE BEEN SENT ANY BUZZ
BALLS? NEXT TIME YOU'RE IN A
SUPERMARKET, PICK UP A BUZZ BALL, CRACK IT THERE AND THEN.
THAT'S WHAT I DO. BUY TWO, DRINK ONE ON THE WAY
AROUND, PAY FOR TWO ON THE WAY OUT, AND AS YOU LEAVE THE TRADER
JOE'S, YOU JUST GOT A LITTLE BUZZ ON.
A SPARKLING WINE IS A LITTLE MORE SOPHISTICATED AND
APPROPRIATE FOR QUEEN ELIZABETH. THIS WAS THE ROYAL FAMILY'S
FIRST IDEA, FIZZY LIZZIE'S ATOMIC HARD SELTZER.
[ LAUGHTER ] AND THAT'S THE NEWS.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH ANNA KLUMSKY AND CHARLIE DAY
>> James: WELCOME BACK! LET'S MEET OUR GUESTS TONIGHT
SHE STARS IN, "INVENTING ANNA," ANNA KLUMSKY!
[ BAND PLAYS ] [REGGIE IMPROVISES VOCALS ]
>> JAMES: HE STARS IN "I WANT YOU BACK," CHARLIE DAY!
[ BAND PLAYS ] [REGGIE IMPROVISES VOCALS ]
THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE! I'M VERY THRILLED THAT YOU'RE
HERE. YOU BOTH LOOK DELICIOUS AND
NUTRITIOUS AND I APPRECIATE THAT.
YESTERDAY WAS VALENTINES. WERE WE A ROMANTIC BUNCH?
HOW DID YOU CELEBRATE, WHAT DID YOU DO?
>> I AM. MY HUSBAND AND I ARE ALWAYS
REALLY GOOD ABOUT CARDS AND TREATS.
I GOT A REESES PEANUT BUTTER CUP I WAS THRILLED ABOUT.
>> James: SENSATIONAL. SO MY KIDS ARE SCHOOL AGE, SO
MOST OF VALENTINES BECOMES DOING ALL THE VALENTINES FOR ALL THE
CLASSMATES. >> James: I CAN'T.
YOU'RE REALLY POKING A NERVE HERE FOR ME.
>> YEAH, WHAT'S YOUR NERVE? >> James: HAS THIS ALWAYS BEEN
THE WAY IN AMERICA? >> SINCE I REMEMBER, YES.
>> James: IT'S JUST A BAD IDEA.
>> I AGREE WITH YOU, IT'S REALLY STRANGE.
>> James: WHEN DOES IT STOP? DO YOU WRITE CARDS AND THINGS?
>> IT'S ALWAYS BEEN THE WAY. THE FOUNDING FATHERS WERE, LIKE,
LET'S MAKE SURE THE CHILDREN GIVE EACH OTHER THEIR
VALENTINES. THE PARENTS WILL DO THEM FOR THE
CHILDREN. >> James: BUT IS THERE AN AGE
THAT IT STOPS IN AMERICA? >> I THINK IT STOPS BY HIGH
SCHOOL. NO?
>> James: SO 12? WHEN THEY MEAN IT.
>> James: SO WHEN YOU'RE 12, IT'S, LIKE, ON YOUR OWN, KID,
YOU GET WHAT YOU GET. >> OR THAT PERSON GOT, YOU KNOW,
TEN VALENTINES AND THAT KID GOT NONE AND WE ALL KNOW HOW THIS
SHAKES OUT. WE ALL KNOW THE HIERARCHY.
>> James: CHARLIE YOU DON'T REALLY CELEBRATE VALENTINES AND
YOU DON'T GET BIG INTO IT. >> NO.
>> James: BUT LAST WEEK WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND YOU WENT BIG?
>> I DIDN'T INTEND TO BUT WE WENT TO A REALLY FANCY JAPANESE
RESTAURANT AND WE HAD LIKE A SEVEN-COURSE MEAL.
THEY DID, LIKE, A SEVEN-COURSE SAKEEÉ TASTING.
>> James: OH... AND THEY WERE REAL AMBITIOUS
SO IT WAS LIKE THAT, AND SEVEN OF THOSE --
>> James: OH, MY GOD -- IS SIX TOO MANY.
>> James: HANG ON. THE WHOLE THING FULL OF SAKEEÉ.
>> YEAH. >> James: AND YOU JUST --
OH, I TOOK CARE OF IT. >> James: WELL DONE.
YEAH. AND YOU'RE SITTING EACH TIME,
EATING EACH COURSE AND THEN YOU GET UP.
>> James: YOU'RE TRADITIONALLY NOT EATING THE VOLUME OF FOOD
THAT YOU NEED TO EAT TO DEAL WITH THAT AMOUNT OF SAKEEÉ.
YOU'RE NOT HAVING FRIES TO THE TABLE.
YOU'RE HAVING A SMALL THING OF RAW FISH AND THEN STAND UP AND
JUST FALL OVER. >> WE MIGHT HAVE GONE TO AN IN
AND OUT BURGER AFTERWARD, I'M NOT SURE.
YOU HAVE TO ASK THE UBER DRIVER. I DON'T REMEMBER THE THING.
>> OH, DEAR. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
>> James: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AND I'M GLAD YOU WENT HARD AS
EVERYONE SHOULD. >> THANK YOU.
>> James: NOW, ANNA, YOU'RE FROM CHICAGO.
>> I AM. >> James: BUT I'VE ALWAYS
ASSOCIATED PEOPLE FROM CHICAGO WITH A VERY PARTICULAR ACCENT
WHICH YOU DON'T HAVE. >> THAT'S DIVINE THAT YOU THINK
THAT. I THINK MOST OF THE PEOPLE THAT
DON'T KNOW ME WEALTHY I HAVE A REALLY OBNOXIOUS CHICAGO ACCENT.
>> James: REALLY? YEAH.
>> James: I DON'T HEAR IT. NONE OF THE CHARACTERS I'VE
PLAYED ARE FROM CHICAGO, SO MAYBE THAT'S WHY.
I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T KNOW.
>> James: I THINK I'M PROBABLY TOO BRITISH AND I THINK WHEN
PEOPLE ARE FROM CHICAGO, THEY'RE LIKE, CHICAGO.
>> I HAVE SAY SAUSAGE, POP -- I DON'T SAY SODA.
>> HOW DO YOU SAY THE FOOTBALL TEAM.
>> THE BEARS. >> James: WHAT.
THE BEARS. >> James: YOU SAY IT DOWN,
DA BEARS. I CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT MOVING MY
HEAD. >> YOU CAN.
>> James: NO, I CAN'T. DA BEARS.
I GENUINELY CAN'T DO IT. >> WHY NOT?
MIKE DITKA. YOU SAY, LIKE, MIKE DITKA.
>> James: OH, PLEASE. NOT MY FAULT.
>> James: WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, LET'S NOT START GETTING
OUR DICKERS OUT. >> I'M NOT TOUCHING THAT ONE.
>> James: CHARLIE, ARE YOU AWARE THERE'S A PETITION ONLINE
ABOUT YOUR VOICE, AN IT'S CALLED LET CHARLIE DAY KNOW HIS VOICE
IS BEAUTIFUL. HAVE YOU SEEN THIS?
>> THAT'S KIND OF SWEET! >> James: DO YOU NOT THINK
YOUR VOICE IS BEAUTIFUL? >> NO.
[ LAUGHTER ] NO.
I MEAN, WELL, IT TOOK ME A WHILE TO REALIZE I HAD AN ODD VOICE
BECAUSE WHAT I HEAR IS LIKE A JAMES EARL JONES, MORGAN FREEMAN
KIND OF THING. >> James: OH, OKAY.
I HEAR A RICH, SEXY VOICE. YOU HAVE WONDERFUL
CONFIDENCE. >> THANK YOU.
AD THEN WHEN I SEE A MOVIE I'M IN, I'M, LIKE, HAVE THEY PITCHED
IT UP? WHAT ARE THEY DOING?
>> James: BUT DOES ANYONE IN YOUR FAMILY HAVE A SIMILAR
VOICE? YOU HAVE A SISTER.
>> NO, I'M THE ONLY ONE BLESSED WITH THIS ODD VOICE.
BUT I'M PRETTY SURE, LIKE, ANY DAY NOW IT'S GOING TO DROP, AND
THE NEXT, LIKE, FIVE, TEN YEARS, MY CAREER IS GOING TO BE A WHOLE
DIFFERENT -- [ TALKING IN LOW TONES ]
>> James: ANNA, WHAT WOULD YOU DO WHEN YOU ENTERTAINED YOURSELF
AROUND THE HOUSE. >> I WAS AN ONLY CHILD FOR 14
YEARS BEFORE MY HALF BROTHER WAS BORN.
>> ONE GUY! [ LAUGHTER ]
>> AND WE ALSO DIDN'T GROW UP IN THE SAME HOUSE SO TOTALLY ONLY
CHILD, AND I ENTERTAINED MYSELF VERY WELL.
I HAD LOTS AND LOTS OF BARBIES GROWING UP, I WAS VERY INVOLVED
WITH THEIR STORY. I COPIED THEIR FACES AND WOULD
WRITE OUT ALL THEIR INFORMATION AND LAMINATE THE PIECES OF PAPER
SO THAT THEY HAD, LIKE, I.D.S. >> James: WOW.
WE HAD CARPET SAMPLES I WOULD MAKE, LIKE, THEIR NEIGHBORHOOD.
WE HAD A BARBIE THAT WASN'T REAL, SHE WAS THE COSTCO BRAND
BARBIE AND SO SHE BECAME, LIKE, THE VILLAGE ALCOHOLIC.
I AFFIXED A BOTTLE TO HER HAND. SHE LOST CUSTODY OF HER TEENAGE
DAUGHTER WHO GOT PREGNANT, IT WAS VERY INVOLVED.
>> James: IS SHE OKAY? NO.
>> James: CHARLIE, YOU'RE BRILLIANT IN THIS FILM.
WHAT IS IT ABOUT AND WHO DO YOU PLAY?
>> SHOUT OUT, WE ARE THE NUMBER ONE MOVIE NOW ACROSS ALL
STREAMING PLATFORMS. >> WHAT!
I WANT TO SAY CONGRATULATIONS TO THE TEAM.
>> OH, WOW. THAT'S AWESOME, THANK YOU.
>> BUT TO PLUG THE MOVIE I PLAY A GUY NAMED PETER AND I GET
DUMPED AND I RUN INTO A WOMAN NAMED EMMA PLAYED BY JENNY SLATE
WHO HAS ALSO BEEN BROKEN UP WITH AND WE REALIZE WE'RE IN THE SAME
PREDICAMENT AND WE DECIDE WHY DON'T WE USE EACH OTHERS'
TALENTS TO WIN BACK OUR EXES. SO SHE TRIES TO WOO MY
GIRLFRIEND'S NEW BOYFRIEND AWAY FROM HER AND I TRIED TO WORK OUT
WITH HER TRAINER EXBOYFRIEND WHICH LEADS TO THE COMEDY PART.
>> James: THERE'S A SCENE WHERE YOUR CHARACTER JUMPS OFF A
ROOF INTO A HOT TUB. NOW, IT'S ACTUALLY YOU.
>> PARTS OF IT. >> James: RIGHT.
ARE YOU A DAREDEVIL IN REAL LIFE?
IS THIS SOMETHING YOU WOULD -- >> YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M EASILY LED
BY MY PEERS. GROWING UP I JUMPED OFF ALL
SORTS OF CRAZY DANGEROUS THINGS. THERE'S A BRIDGE.
I GREW UP IN RHODE ISLAND SURROUNDED BY WATER AND THERE
WAS A BRIDGE WE JUMPED OFF OF. THE BRIDGE, THAT'S NOT THE
DANGEROUS PART. WHAT WAS HE CAN TICK IS YOU HAD
TO SWIM OFFSHORE AND HAD TO TRY NOT TO GET HIT BY A BOAT.
THE OTHER KIDS WERE DOING IT AND I WAS A SUCKER FOR PEER
PRESSURE. >> James: IT WAS GREAT
TRAINING AND THE FILM IS ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT A CLIP FROM "I WANT YOU BACK"
WHICH IS OUT NOW ON AMAZON PRIME VIDEO.
>> I DON'T THINK YOU CAN GET TO JENNY.
>> YOU MADE THAT PERFECTLY CLEAR.
>> BUT I DO THINK YOU COULD BECOME NOAH'S FRIEND.
>> I COULD DO THAT. PEOPLE LIKE TO BE MY FRIEND.
I'M EXTREMELY AFFABLE. IN COLLEGE, ALL THE GIRLS WERE,
LIKE, YOU'RE SUCH A GOOD FRIEND. >> OH, DARN IT.
PEOPLE LIKE TO BE MY FRIEND. I GET IN HIS HEAD.
>> AND MAKE HIM REALIZE JENNY IS NOT THAT GREAT.
>> SHE'S NOT THAT GREAT. AND I'M THE ONE WHO GOT AWAY.
DO YOU REALLY THINK WE CAN DO THIS?
>> YES, I DO. I WILL IF YOU'RE IN.
WE WILL WIN BACK OUR PEOPLE. IT'S ON!
>> James: STICK AROUND, MORE OF THESE TWO WHEN WE COME BACK!
>> YOU PUT UP A GOOD FIGHT IN THERE.
I CAN'T IMAGINE A YOUNG WOMAN HER AGE HAVING TO SPEND TIME AT
RIKERS LIKE THAT. >> HAPPENS.
>> James: I DIDN'T NOTICE IF SHE HAD FAMILY IN THE COURTROOM.
>> I HAVE NO COMMENT. DIDN'T ASK FOR ONE.
BUT YOU WERE GOING TO. I DIDN'T KNOW IF YOU HAD AN
IDEA HOW SHE GOT MIXED UP. >> NO COMMENT.
FORTRESS, TRUE POWER PLAYER PRIVATE EQUITY.
THAT IS NOT A SANDBOX MOST 26-YEAR-OLDS WOULD PLAY IN OR
EVEN KNOW EXISTED BUT SHE DID. HOW DID SHE KNOW?
>> NO COMMENT.
>> JAMES: THAT WAS A CLIP FROM "INVENTING ANNA" WHICH IS
STREAMING NOW ON NETFLIX. CONGRATULATIONS ON THE SHOW.
>> THANK YOU [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> James: TELL US ALL ABOUT IT.
>> SO, YEAH, IT'S BASED ON A TRUE STORY OF A YOUNG WOMAN
NAMED ANNA DELVIS/ANNA SORIGAN WHO SCAMMED HER WAY TO THE TOP
OF NEW YORK CITY FINANCE AND I PLAY AN INVESTIGATORS WHO
INVESTIGATES THE STORY. >> James: DID YOU KNOW SANDRA
BEFORE YOU WORKED WITH HER ON THIS?
>> I ONLY KNEW OF HER. I WAS IN LOS ANGELES FOR A DAY
DOING PRESS FOR THE LAST SHOW I DID CALLED "VEEP," AND -- THANK
YOU -- [ APPLAUSE ]
-- AND WE HAD A GENERAL MEETING SO WE GABBED AND GABBED AND
GABBED ABOUT THAT SCRIPT BY I THOUGHT WAS SO FASCINATING AND
COULDN'T WAIT TO FINISH. IT WAS A TERRIFIC MEETING AND I
REALLY WANTED TO PLAY THAT ROLE SO I GOT TO.
>> James: GREAT. SUCH A GOOD SHOW.
NOW, CHARLIE, YOU'VE MADE 15 SEASONS OF "IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY IN
PHILADELPHIA" MAKES IT THE LONGEST RUNNING SITCOM OF ALL
TIME. DID YOU ALWAYS WANT TO WORK IN
COMEDY? WHEN DID YOU KNOW YOU WANTED TO
WORK IN COMEDY? WERE YOU A CLASS CLOWN IN
SCHOOL? >> OH, YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
CLASS CLOWN, I WAS EIGHTH GRADE, VOTED FUNNIEST, HIGH SCHOOL
VOTED THINKS HE'S THE FUNNIEST. >> OH, THAT'S VERY NICHE OF
THEM. >> IT WAS VERY LOUSY OF THEM.
BUT I WAS ALSO VOTED FUNNIEST IN HIGH SCHOOL, SO CAN'T BLAME ME
FOR BEING RIGHT. I MEAN, I WAS RIGHT!
>> James: YOU WERE VOTED THINKS HE'S FUN NEST BUT SOMEONE
ELSE VOTED FUNNIEST. >> NO, I WAS ALSO VOTED
FUNNIEST. >> James: BOTH.
IN THE SAME YEAR. >> AND THEY HAD A CATEGORY FOR
EACH ONE, JUST TO COVER ALL THE EXISTENTIALISM.
>> ONE TO BUILD YOU UP, ONE TO KNOCK YOU DOWN, A REAL
NEW ENGLAND MOVE. >> James: EVERYONE GETS A
VALENTINES CARD AND THEN -- GET OUT OF HERE!
>> THAT'S IT. >> James: REGGIE, DO YOU HAVE
A QUESTION FOR OUR GUESTS THIS EVENING?
>> Reggie: YES, I DO. TONIGHT'S QUESTION GOES TO --
[ DRUM ROLL ] BOTH TO ANNA AND --
♪ CHARLIE DAY, IT WOULD BE SO NICE... ♪
>> ON KEY. >> James: I LOVE THAT.
WE SHOULD HAVE DONE THAT EARLIER, MESSED AROUND WITH THE
BASTILLE STUFF. WE SHOULD HAVE DONE.
♪ CHARLIEDAY, CHARLIE DAY COME TOGETHER IN EVERY NATION ♪
LET'S DO THAT TOMORROW NIGHT ON THE SHOW.
>> PLEASE DO IT. >> James: WE'LL DO IT TOMORROW
ON A BIG MADONNA PARODY. >> THIS IS EXCITING.
>> Reggie: HERE'S THE QUESTION.
AS A LOT OF PEOPLE MAY KNOW, I HAVE A SIX-YEAR-OLD AND A
THREE-YEAR-OLD -- >> REALLY?
>> Reggie: -- AND RAISING KIDS IS HARD THESE DAYS WITH THE
ECONOMY AND STUFF, AND DO YOU HAVE ANY ADVICE FOR SOMEONE
THAT'S RAISING AN EIGHT-YEAR-OLD THAT WANTS TO FIND OUT MORE
ABOUT WHO THEY ARE BUT STILL HAHASTO MAINTAIN ANOTHER LIFE F?
>> AH... YOU WANT TO TAKE THAT ONE?
>> James: START WITH YOU, ANNA THEN WE'LL COME TO YOU, CHARLIE.
WHAT DO YOU THINK. >> LOTS OF WATER AND PLENTY OF
SUNLIGHT. >> James: CHARLIE?
I HEARD SIX, THREE, EIGHT AND TWO KIDS, WHICH MEANS AS YOU'RE
DROPPING KIDS AS YOU'RE TELLING THE STORY, SIMPLY DROP ANOTHER
ONE AND YOU ONLY HAVE ONE KID TO WORRY ABOUT.
DROP ANOTHER ONE AFTER THAT, ZERO KIDS, NO PROBLEMS.
>> Reggie: THANK YOU SO MUCH. BOTH YOUR RESPONSES ARE CORRECT.
>> James: IT'S ABSOLUTELY CORRECT!
ANNA KLUMSKY, CHARLIE DAY, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> James: WELCOME BACK.
WE'VE GOT SOME FANTASTIC GUESTS COMING UP ON THE SHOW: OLYMPIC
GOLD MEDALIST CHLOE KIM, REBECCA HALL, IKE BARINHOLTZ, SAM
RICHARDSON, DAVE GROHL AND WILL ARNETT, PLUS MUSIC FROM MACHINE
GUN KELLY AND WILLOW SMITH. BELLED LOVE YOU TO BE HERE BUT
IF YOU CAN'T MAKE IT TO L.A. TO WATCH IN PERSON, YOU CAN STREAM
FULL EPISODES ON PARAMOUNT+ OR CHECK OUT OUR YOUTUBE PAGE.
AND, PLEASE DON'T FORGET TO FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER AT LATE
LATE SHOW. YOU CAN ALSO HEART ME ON
INSTAGRAM LINK ME ON LINKED IN
PIN ME ON PINTEREST SNAP ME ON SNAPCHAT
INITIAL ME ON DOCUSIGN BATHROOM ME ON OCCUPIED
GET ME RETURNS ON TURBOTAX GET YOUR BOOSTER ON TURBOVAX,
BUDGET ME ON MINT RUPERT ME ON GRINT
POCKET ME ON LINT SEND YOUR BOYFRIEND
ENGAGEMENT RING PHOTOS ON HINT, FIND ME A DATE ON HINGE
MAKE ME GO [OOH BUTTON]
ON CRINGE MANAGE MY NETWORK ON HOOTSUITE
MANAGE HIS SHIRTS ON FRUITPETE TAG MY PLANTS ON PICTURETHIS
GRAB MY PRATTS ON PICTURECHRIS BEAT ME ON WORDLE
CINCH ME ON GIRDLE BUY ME TICKETS ON STUBHUB
BUY THIGH POWDER ON CHUBRUB GET ME CLEAN ON TUBSCRUB
PISS OFF A BEAR ON CUBSNUB UPVOTE ME ON REDDIT
NORTON ME ON ED-DIT CONNECT WITH ME ON SAY-SO
RE-CONNECT WITH BEN ON J.LO BUY ME DOG TREATS ON CHEWY
TALK LIKE GEN Z ON CHEW-GEE FIND ME A HOTEL ON HOPPER
FIND ME AN ARNOLD ON GET TO DA CHOPPA
MONKEY ME ON MAILCHIMP SALAD ME ON KALEBLIMP
LOCKER ME ON PALEWIMP COCKTAIL ME ON TAILSHRIMP
MAKE SOME PLANS ON EVERNOTE EAT SOME CANS ON CLEVERGOAT
TAKE SOME NOTES ON NOTABILITY TRAIN SOME GOATS ON GOAT AGILITY
GAME WITH ME ON TWITCH ABERCROMBIE ME ON FITCH
MEET WITH ME ON ZOOM MEET PUBERTY ON DAD IT'S MY ROOM
OR, IF YOU WISH, FEEL FREE TO WRITE ME AN OLD-FASHIONED LETTER
BY ADDRESSING IT TO TELEVISION CITY STUDIOS, 7800 BEVERLY
BOULEVARD, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA 90036.
AND DON'T FORGET TO SEAL THAT ENVELOPE, WITH A KISS.
WHEN THE LETTER ARRIVES, I'LL FIND THE ENVELOPE TO BE EMPTY
BECAUSE, UNFORTUNATELY, A KISS IS ACTUALLY NOT A GOOD SEALING
AGENT. I'LL WONDER WHY SOMEONE WOULD DO
SOMETHING AS RUDE AS SENDING ME AN EMPTY ENVELOPE, FIND YOUR
NAME IN THE RETURN ADDRESS AND HAVE YOU PERMANENTLY BANNED FROM
EVER ENTERING CBS. MEANWHILE, HAVING NEVER HEARD
BACK FROM ME, YOU'LL FEAR THE WORST AND COME STRAIGHT TO CBS
TO CHECK THAT I'M OKAY. WHEN THE GUARDS DON'T LET YOU IN
YOU'LL GET EVEN MORE NERVOUS, SUMMONING A BRUTE STRENGTH THAT
YOU NEVER KNEW YOU HAD IN YOU AND MAKE YOUR WAY THROUGH THEM.
THEY'LL SEND ME A WARNING THAT SOMEONE IS COMING TO FIND ME SO,
I'LL CLOSE THE DOOR TO MY OFFICE AND SEAL IT, WITH A KISS.
THIS WILL OF COURSE NOT STOP YOU FROM COMING RIGHT IN.
RELIEVED TO FIND I'M OKAY, YOU'LL CALM DOWN.
AFTER SOME NERVOUS EXPLANATIONS WE'LL REALIZE WHAT HAPPENED AND
THEN WE'LL HAVE A REALLY GOOD LAUGH ABOUT IT.
THE COPS WILL THEN ARRIVE AND PUT HANDCUFFS ON YOU.
BUT THEY'LL SEAL THE HANDCUFFS
WITH, A TITANIUM LOCK. I'M SORRY, I KNOW YOUR
INTENTIONS WERE GOOD, BUT YOU COMMITTED A CRIME, AND YOU MUST
PROPERLY MAKE YOUR WAY THROUGH THE US LEGAL SYSTEM.
>> James: WELCOME BACK. THEY'RE A TALENTED POP-ROCK BAND
HAILING FROM ENGLAND. THEIR BRILLIANT NEW ALBUM, GIVE
ME THE FUTURE IS NUMBER ONE IN THE U.K..
RIGHT NOW, HERE, PERFORMING THEIR SINGLE, "SHUT OFF THE
LIGHTS," PLEASE WELCOME, BASTILLE!
♪ ♪
♪ I,
I'M LOST IN MY HEAD AGAIN ♪ TIME TRAVELLING,
RUNNING A-, ♪ RUNNING AWAY WITH DARKNESS
MY ONLY FRIEND ♪ DON'T WANNA DO THIS
ALL AGAIN ♪ YOU PULL ME BACK
DOWN TO EARTH ♪ CLOTHES OFF,
YOUR HANDS ARE ON, ♪ HANDS ARE ON ME
GRACELAND-ING ONTO YOUR BED ♪ THERE YOU ARE IN MY HEAD,
THERE'S A BEAT ♪ IT'S THE BEAT
THAT YOU MAKE ♪ WHEN YOU'RE MOVING YOUR BODY
YOU PROVE THAT I CAN'T ESCAPE, ♪ I CAN'T ESCAPE
GOT MY HEART IN YOUR HANDS ♪ AND YOUR HANDS ON MY CHEST
IN MY CHEST ♪ THERE'S A BREATH
IT'S THE BREATH ♪ THAT YOU TAKE AWAY
AND YOU SAID ♪ SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS
WE DON'T NEED THEM ♪ TO DANCE HEY
OH, YOU SAID ♪ JUST SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS,
WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE ♪ OH OH, YOU SAID
JUST SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS
WE'RE DRUNK, ♪ WE'RE INVINCIBLE
NO GOING QUIETLY ♪ INTO THE NIGHT
THIS ROOM IS OUR UNIVERSE ♪ YOU ARE MY GRAVITY
TONIGHT NO TALK OF THE FUTURE ♪ NOW DARK THOUGHTS,
YOU'RE SHAKING 'EM, ♪ TAKING 'EM OUT
THIS RHYTHM THAT WE CREATE ♪ SETS ME STRAIGHT IN MY HEAD,
THERE'S A BEAT ♪ IT'S THE BEAT
THAT YOU MAKE ♪ WHEN YOU'RE MOVING YOUR BODY
YOU PROVE THAT I CAN'T ESCAPE, ♪ I CAN'T ESCAPE
GOT MY HEART IN YOUR HANDS ♪ AND YOUR HANDS ON MY CHEST
IN MY CHEST THERE'S A BREATH ♪ IT'S THE BREATH
THAT YOU TAKE AWAY ♪ AND YOU SAID
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE
♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE
♪ ♪ ♪ AND YOU SAID
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ AND YOU SAID
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE
♪ ♪ ♪ AND YOU SAID
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE
♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ ♪
♪ ♪
♪ AND YOU SAID
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE
♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ ♪
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS,
♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE ♪ ♪
SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS, ♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE
♪ AND YOU SAID SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS,
♪ WE DON'T NEED THEM TO DANCE ♪ ♪
♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> JAMES: BASTILLE, EVERYONE
TICKETS FOR THEIR GIVE ME THE FUTURE WORLD TOUR ARE AVAILABLE
RIGHT NOW. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ][ BAND P] >> James: THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR WATCHING TONIGHT! TOMORROW, EXCITING SUPER BOWL
CHAMPION AARON DONALD IS COMING STRAIGHT FROM THE PARADE TO BE
HERE. ADAM MCKAY & REBECCA HALL.
REGGIE, TAKE US HOME. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]