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[music]
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- Heya, fellas!
- Heya, Frank!
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[car sputters]
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[Frank sighs]
[Susan] Daddy's home! Time for dinner.
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- I made pigs in blankets.
- Oh, my favorite. Thanks, honey.
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Dad, do you know anything about magnets?
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A buddy from the war
has one in his head.
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We used to throw paper clips
at it. Does that help you?
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Daddy, I got an "A" on my spelling test!
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Oh, that's wonderful, princess.
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Well, I guess His Royal Highness
has finally decided to join us.
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Yeah, I'm high, all right.
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All right, guys, dig in.
Oh, so I gotta tell ya,
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the funniest thing
happened at work today.
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Ed calls a mandatory
meeting, we go to the break
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room, and he's just
bragging about his new tie.
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[chuckles] So then I says to Ed...
[phone ringing]
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Jesus Christ. I'm not answering that.
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Frank, you should answer it.
What if somebody got hurt?
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Nobody ever gets hurt
at supper, Susan, OK?
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It's always some goddamn
salesman, and I'm not answering it.
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Dad, we all know you're gonna answer it.
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You don't know a goddamn thing about me.
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[ringing continues]
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What if it's important?
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I sweated blood at that
airport for 12 hours today,
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and what's important to me
is I have just one moment
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of peace with my family, enjoying
a delicious home-cooked meal.
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Is that too much to ask?
I'm not answering it.
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[ringing continues]
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Shit.
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Murphy residence.
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Oh, let me tell you something,
you goddamn son of a bitch.
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I don't need a goddamn
engraved family Bible!
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You see? You see?
What did I say?
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Every goddamn time. I am eating
dinner with my family, young man!
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I don't need a $25 Bible
to teach me about God.
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I almost bled out in Korea, all right?!
I have met God!
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What did you just say to me?
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Ah, you come down here and
you say that to me like a man!
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I swear I'll pull your tongue
out through your goddamn neck!
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[growling, shrieking]
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Why do they have to put the
goddamn things on the wall?
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- Frank, calm down.
- Yeah, "Frank, calm down, calm down."
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It's always "Frank, calm down!"
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Why's it always me, Susan?
How about a little support? Huh?
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Would that kill ya?
[door thud, clank]
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[exhales, chuckles]
[low thuds in garage]
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So, how was school?
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Goddamn punk, calling me at supper.
Huh? Huh?
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Won't even come to my door like a man?!
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Hi, Mr. Murphy.
Can Billy come out and play?
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Get the fuck outta here!
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[voice echoing]
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[up-tempo song playing]
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[grunts, screams]
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1x01 - "The Bleedin' in Sweden"
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[crickets chirring]
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[man on TV] And now, back to Colt Luger.
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[motorcycle revs on TV]
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[cackling]
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- It's time to die, Luger.
- Is that so, Boneskull?
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Well, I say it's time you took
a bath... in your own blood!
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Here it comes. Here it comes.
[gunshot on TV]
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[grunts, screams]
[bike crashing]
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[clicking]
[Frank] Oh, he's out of bullets!
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[woman on TV] Colt,
they're gonna kill us!
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- They'll try, Sweet Cakes.
- But what can you do?
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Sometimes a man's gotta do...
[thudding]
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- ...what a man does.
- What a man does.
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See? You see that?
That right there, that is a man.
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- That is a stunt man.
- What was that?
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- Nothing.
- That's enough, Kevin.
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Your father already had
his dinner ruined, don't you
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ruin his favorite show.
It's one of his few joys in life.
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[man on TV] Colt Luger will
return after these messages.
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Ah, shit, commercials.
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It's the heavyweight
boxing event of the decade!
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Haywood "Big Skillet" Shavers
defends his title against
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Irish Mickey Ireland, out to
avenge his heartbreaking loss,
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forever known now as
"The Bleedin' in Sweden!"
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The slaughter starts at nine,
on Sunday Bloody Sunday!
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Right after an all new
There's a Fairy On My Shoulder.
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That's my guy!
That's my guy, Irish Mickey.
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Ya know, he would've beat
Shavers the last time, but
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lost on a technicality
'cause the ref thought he was
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bleeding too much, which he wasn't.
He lost because he was drunk.
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Hey, Sue, I gotta have
everybody over to watch this.
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Some food, some beer.
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I'll throw one of my
"Frank's Famous Fight Parties"
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- for the whole neighborhood.
- That's a great idea.
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I know. You better start
cooking, good looking.
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- Can I watch the fight too?
- No. This is gonna be a grown-up party,
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so you kids are gonna
have to stay in your rooms.
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Close the door and lock 'em.
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Oh, this is gonna be fun, Sue.
I mean, this is gonna be big.
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You can put my chair right
in the middle of the room,
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right in front of the TV.
Get some that good bottled beer.
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And make that "Frank's Special
Chip Dip." [plop in toilet]
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You know, with cream
cheese and chili in a can?
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[dryer whirring]
[yelling] And those fancy potato chips
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that come in a tin!
We can use it as a garbage can after!
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And maybe some...
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[panting] Those... those deviled eggs?
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Can you make some of those?
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[Susan] Yeah. Are you
gonna stuff the eggs?
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- Oh, you're the best, sweet cakes.
- Stuff 'em!
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- Stuff 'em!
- You're the best! Oh!
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Oh, you're the best!
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Have fun! Come home when
the streetlights come on!
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Don't go playing with those dirty
kids down the end of the block.
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- They probably have chiggers!
- [kids] We won't!
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What do you want to do?
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[Southern accent] We found a
rusty lawn mower in the woods.
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[Southern accent] Dare you to lick it.
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[Maureen] How much will you give me?
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Hey, you stay away from that
loose girl down on River Street.
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I don't want any half-slut grandkids.
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- We're not doing anything.
- Neither was I.
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- That's how you got here!
- That's a fine boy you got there, Frank.
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Ah, he's a fuckin' animal.
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Street sign: yes.
Magnetic attraction
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has many properties.
Actually, too many to mention.
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[slobbering sounds]
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What the hell are you doing?
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Tastes like Momma's gun.
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Give it back, Kenny!
[Kenny growls]
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- Oh, you'll never get it now.
- Bite down hard, Ken!
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[growls]
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[magnet clangs]
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Oh, man, that's the Nazi's house.
He's gonna kill me!
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Who's a Nazi, Ben?
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You know, that German
guy in that there house.
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Kids all say he's
Hitler's little brother.
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Yeah, yeah, and he hunts down kids.
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Shut up, he's gonna hear you!
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[all gasp]
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[door creaking]
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[German accent] Well, hello.
Do you need some help?
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[voice wavering] No, I'm OK.
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- Oh, please, it is my pleasure.
- It's OK, I got it.
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- He almost got you!
- You see that number on his arm?
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That's how many people he's killed.
It's a scoreboard!
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Have a wonderful day, children!
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Oh, it is gonna be one
hell of a fight party.
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Sue is going all out. She's
making those deviled eggs you like.
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She's got the Rice Krispies with
the toothpick things in there.
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All right? We got plenty of booze.
Everyone's coming.
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- Everybody's getting loaded.
- I can bring a Jell-O loaf!
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Jell-O?
Babe, this is a fight,
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not a party for someone
with stomach cancer.
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Yeah, the thing is, actually, it's...
[chuckles]
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it's a little delicate, but uh...
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we've already been invited to
watch the fight over at, uh...
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- at Vic's.
- Vic's?
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Wait, we always
watch the fight at my house.
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I am the fight host on
this block! And why the hell
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would you want to hang out
with that guy anyways? Huh?
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00:08:33,580 --> 00:08:36,333
What, do you like his hair, and
his car, acting all Hollywood?
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You can't see through
that phony positivity?
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"Hey, guys! You need some help?
Oh, have a great day!"
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Fucking asshole. Last time, I'm
walking with my wife, my woman,
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he's got the nerve to go,
"Hey, Frank, you're a lucky man."
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"Lucky man"? Luck had
nothing to do with it, punk!
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Hey, Frank, take it easy, take it easy.
166
00:08:54,226 --> 00:08:56,603
Nothing against you, we
just kind of like him.
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- For one thing, he smells great.
- He's got you there, Frank.
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[car approaching]
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Ah, Christ. Here he comes.
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[rock music playing]
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[tires squealing]
[music stops]
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Hola, amigos!
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- Just the men I want to see.
- [woman] Mm...
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00:09:22,345 --> 00:09:25,682
Would you look at that jerk, carrying
on like he's a goddamn astronaut.
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- Probably has the clap.
- Kitty Kat, make me some mac and chee.
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Not the spiral kind,
that makes me dizzy.
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[slap]
[giggles]
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Hey, so how about that fight?
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Big Skillet's gonna kill
that pasty booze-bag.
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00:09:38,612 --> 00:09:41,322
Hey, where's your loyalty?
You're white.
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00:09:41,406 --> 00:09:44,367
So what? Black dudes are cool.
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00:09:44,451 --> 00:09:46,661
You ever seen one naked?
I do all the time.
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00:09:46,745 --> 00:09:49,789
- Big stars, too.
- Oh, yeah? Which ones?
184
00:09:49,872 --> 00:09:52,270
One of the Four Tops was
washing his armpits in
185
00:09:52,271 --> 00:09:54,669
the men's room at the radio
station just last week.
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00:09:54,753 --> 00:09:57,756
He was the main one, I think.
We made eye contact.
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00:09:57,838 --> 00:10:01,578
Good guy.
Hey, Frank, it'd be righteous
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00:10:01,613 --> 00:10:03,386
if you joined us to
watch the fight at my house.
189
00:10:03,470 --> 00:10:06,723
- Thirty-two inches of living color.
- Thirty-two inches?
190
00:10:06,806 --> 00:10:08,933
- That's pretty big.
- Up here, Babe.
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00:10:09,016 --> 00:10:11,352
Well, thanks, but you're a little late.
192
00:10:11,436 --> 00:10:13,980
Everyone in the neighborhood
is already coming over
193
00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:17,164
to watch the fight on my new
color set. It's 33 inches.
194
00:10:17,191 --> 00:10:18,818
[Vic] They make 'em that size?
195
00:10:18,901 --> 00:10:21,780
- They do for me.
- Out of sight.
196
00:10:21,862 --> 00:10:25,283
You got it all going on. I bet
you're digging the skin you're in.
197
00:10:25,366 --> 00:10:29,746
- You bet your ass I am.
- Hey, Vic! It's hot.
198
00:10:29,829 --> 00:10:32,290
About to get hotter. See ya, fellas!
[Kitty Kat giggles]
199
00:10:32,373 --> 00:10:35,075
Eh, Frank, I look through
your window every night.
200
00:10:35,076 --> 00:10:36,877
And I've never seen a color TV.
201
00:10:36,961 --> 00:10:40,590
- It's great that you got one!
- Yeah. I was gonna surprise you.
202
00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:43,760
Well, it's gonna be one hell of a party.
203
00:10:43,843 --> 00:10:45,970
[shouts] Frank got
himself a new color TV!
204
00:10:46,053 --> 00:10:50,677
- It's 33 inches!
- [German man] Oh, that's wunderbar!
205
00:10:50,809 --> 00:10:51,851
Oh, shit.
206
00:10:57,816 --> 00:11:00,450
That was bitchin'!
[groans]
207
00:11:01,027 --> 00:11:02,278
[all] Ew...
208
00:11:02,362 --> 00:11:05,490
- My turn!
- Hold your balls!
209
00:11:06,949 --> 00:11:10,620
Look out...
[voice slows] ...below!
210
00:11:12,831 --> 00:11:15,175
Oh, he's gone too far.
211
00:11:16,334 --> 00:11:17,544
[crashing]
212
00:11:18,669 --> 00:11:21,089
[boy] What the shit was that?
213
00:11:22,090 --> 00:11:25,753
Oh, my God, big kids! Run!
214
00:11:26,719 --> 00:11:28,429
[grunts, forced chuckle]
215
00:11:28,512 --> 00:11:31,682
Hiya, Jimmy.
Sorry about your house.
216
00:11:31,766 --> 00:11:35,227
It's not my house, shit stain.
It's my clubhouse.
217
00:11:35,311 --> 00:11:37,438
And I'm gonna fuckin' kill you.
218
00:11:37,521 --> 00:11:38,856
[barrel clangs]
Huh?
219
00:11:39,649 --> 00:11:43,820
Little pussy! Get back here,
Murphy, and let me fuckin' kill you!
220
00:11:45,571 --> 00:11:49,366
Frank, why did you do that?
We can't afford a big color TV.
221
00:11:49,450 --> 00:11:51,869
Well, I can't afford
not to have one now.
222
00:11:51,953 --> 00:11:54,789
Things were said in that
driveway that cannot be unsaid.
223
00:11:54,872 --> 00:11:57,165
This is all the money we
have saved in the world.
224
00:11:57,249 --> 00:12:00,015
- It's Kevin's college fund.
- Come on, Sue.
225
00:12:00,050 --> 00:12:01,462
We both know
Kevin's not going to college.
226
00:12:01,545 --> 00:12:04,964
That's not the point.
I just wish you'd told me.
227
00:12:05,303 --> 00:12:08,848
All I'm saying is you don't get to
make big financial decisions
228
00:12:08,931 --> 00:12:11,684
- like this by yourself.
- Then agree with me.
229
00:12:11,767 --> 00:12:13,144
That way we both decided together.
230
00:12:13,227 --> 00:12:17,606
OK. All I ask is that we
stay within our budget.
231
00:12:17,690 --> 00:12:20,026
Absolutely. We will not
spend one more dime than...
232
00:12:20,109 --> 00:12:22,444
[both gasp]
Sweet Jesus.
233
00:12:22,528 --> 00:12:27,382
[slow love song playing]
234
00:12:42,548 --> 00:12:45,134
[music stops]
I see you know your TVs.
235
00:12:45,218 --> 00:12:47,220
This is the Sonabishi Color Plex right here.
236
00:12:47,303 --> 00:12:50,723
It is the biggest and heaviest
television on the market.
237
00:12:52,183 --> 00:12:55,311
Mm, this varnish. It's so decadent.
238
00:12:55,393 --> 00:12:59,523
- It was hand-rubbed in Korea.
- Huh. [gasps]
239
00:12:59,690 --> 00:13:01,817
- Wow.
- [softly] We don't have that much cash.
240
00:13:01,901 --> 00:13:05,779
- We're $50 short.
- I know, but I need this, Sue.
241
00:13:05,863 --> 00:13:07,948
Oh, I need this.
242
00:13:08,032 --> 00:13:10,910
You know, I'll tell you what.
We could finance that last $50
243
00:13:10,993 --> 00:13:14,398
at a point above prime: 26 percent.
244
00:13:14,538 --> 00:13:15,539
Sold.
245
00:13:15,622 --> 00:13:17,415
[both moaning]
246
00:13:18,584 --> 00:13:21,170
- Come on, just touch it a little.
- No.
247
00:13:21,254 --> 00:13:23,130
- I won't tell anybody.
- No.
248
00:13:23,214 --> 00:13:24,965
- Then let me touch you.
- No.
249
00:13:25,049 --> 00:13:27,968
Come on, you're so
pretty and you're so cool,
250
00:13:28,052 --> 00:13:32,430
and I really like you, and you're
the only one I want to touch it.
251
00:13:32,514 --> 00:13:35,851
- All right, but only over your pants.
- Oh, thank you so much.
252
00:13:35,935 --> 00:13:40,064
Kevin! Billy's getting
killed by some big kids!
253
00:13:40,147 --> 00:13:42,913
Now? Son of a bitch!
254
00:13:43,483 --> 00:13:44,777
Ow!
255
00:13:46,237 --> 00:13:49,447
Cut it out! This isn't funny anymore!
[boys laughing]
256
00:13:49,531 --> 00:13:51,325
Leave me alone, you jerks!
257
00:13:51,409 --> 00:13:52,618
Please!
258
00:13:53,786 --> 00:13:55,913
- [boy] Yeah!
- Stop it!
259
00:13:55,996 --> 00:13:58,207
Oh, I'm gonna be a cop!
260
00:13:58,291 --> 00:13:59,499
- [Billy] Ouch!
- [Kevin] Jimmy!
261
00:13:59,583 --> 00:14:01,737
Shit, it's Kevin Murphy!
262
00:14:04,255 --> 00:14:05,505
Oh, hey, Kevin.
263
00:14:06,257 --> 00:14:08,050
[whimpers] Oh, man!
264
00:14:08,134 --> 00:14:10,677
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
265
00:14:10,761 --> 00:14:13,431
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
266
00:14:13,513 --> 00:14:17,768
[groaning, sobs] Oh, man!
Oh, man! Oh, man!
267
00:14:19,895 --> 00:14:21,272
Thanks, Kevin.
268
00:14:23,316 --> 00:14:25,318
[grunts] Oh!
269
00:14:25,401 --> 00:14:27,394
[sobbing]
270
00:14:33,116 --> 00:14:36,119
Kids, this right here is an
example of what can be yours
271
00:14:36,203 --> 00:14:38,434
if you're willing to
work hard and go the extra
272
00:14:38,435 --> 00:14:40,666
mile to give your family
the nice things in life.
273
00:14:40,749 --> 00:14:43,293
You are not to touch
this unless I say so,
274
00:14:43,377 --> 00:14:46,450
and I am never gonna say so.
Is that understood?
275
00:14:46,485 --> 00:14:46,672
- OK.
- Yes.
276
00:14:46,755 --> 00:14:48,173
Good. Now go to bed.
277
00:14:50,676 --> 00:14:51,635
Are you ready?
278
00:14:52,886 --> 00:14:55,180
We did it, Sue. We made it.
279
00:14:55,264 --> 00:14:56,557
Pull the knob.
280
00:14:58,016 --> 00:14:59,101
[upbeat intro music plays]
281
00:14:59,184 --> 00:15:01,853
[man on TV] This is the ABS Evening News.
[audience laughs]
282
00:15:01,937 --> 00:15:04,690
[woman] You're not exactly
Joe Namath yourself!
283
00:15:04,773 --> 00:15:07,901
[man 2 on TV] No, Your Honor,
the defense does not rest.
284
00:15:07,984 --> 00:15:09,236
[crowd on TV gasps]
285
00:15:09,319 --> 00:15:12,114
[man 3 on TV] Ladies and gentlemen:
Evel Knievel.
286
00:15:12,197 --> 00:15:13,449
[upbeat music]
287
00:15:13,532 --> 00:15:17,827
[snoring]
["Star-Spangled Banner" plays on TV]
288
00:15:17,911 --> 00:15:21,123
[static hissing]
[continues snoring]
289
00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:27,921
[clanks]
[yawns] Toaster: yes.
290
00:15:28,004 --> 00:15:32,926
[man on TV] Good morning. Channel Nine
begins its broadcast day with What It Is?
291
00:15:33,009 --> 00:15:37,264
A discussion of today's issues
facing today's black community, today.
292
00:15:37,347 --> 00:15:38,807
With your host, Jim Jeffords.
293
00:15:38,890 --> 00:15:40,726
A happy Sunday to all.
294
00:15:40,768 --> 00:15:44,062
So how do you people feel
about these election results?
295
00:15:44,146 --> 00:15:47,441
I mean, now that the Civil
Rights era has drawn to a close
296
00:15:47,442 --> 00:15:50,736
and we're all equal now. You
know, not that you're going to be
297
00:15:50,737 --> 00:15:52,488
marrying my daughter
or anything. [laughs]
298
00:15:52,571 --> 00:15:56,158
[woman] You have an interesting
way of phrasing things, Mr. Jeffords.
299
00:15:56,241 --> 00:15:58,076
[Jeffords] Thank you, Ms. Unchacka.
300
00:15:58,160 --> 00:15:59,995
[snoring]
[woman] It wasn't a compliment.
301
00:16:00,954 --> 00:16:03,332
It's The Nickel and Pickle Show!
302
00:16:03,415 --> 00:16:05,751
In col...!
[sound distorting]
303
00:16:05,834 --> 00:16:07,795
[hissing, sizzling]
Huh?
304
00:16:08,629 --> 00:16:09,630
[gasps]
305
00:16:10,714 --> 00:16:12,382
[normal audio resumes]
306
00:16:12,466 --> 00:16:14,259
[static hissing]
307
00:16:14,343 --> 00:16:16,679
[audio distorting]
308
00:16:17,971 --> 00:16:19,931
[static hissing]
309
00:16:20,390 --> 00:16:24,102
- [softly] No, no, no, no!
- [softly] What the hell are you doing?
310
00:16:24,186 --> 00:16:28,106
I put the magnet on the TV and
now I can't make it go back!
311
00:16:28,190 --> 00:16:30,609
See? This is what doing
your homework gets you.
312
00:16:31,943 --> 00:16:35,446
All right, pretend to be asleep.
You were never there. It'll be fine.
313
00:16:37,073 --> 00:16:38,492
[Frank] What the hell?
314
00:16:39,493 --> 00:16:40,703
[louder] What the hell?!
315
00:16:40,786 --> 00:16:43,079
Ah, you got to be shittin' me! Susan!
316
00:16:43,163 --> 00:16:45,666
[Susan] Frank, what is it?
[louder] What the hell?!
317
00:16:45,749 --> 00:16:46,875
What happened to it?
318
00:16:46,958 --> 00:16:50,212
- It was like this when I woke up!
- Maybe you watched it too long!
319
00:16:50,295 --> 00:16:53,507
Oh, for Christ's sake, I didn't
watch it too long! It's brand new!
320
00:16:53,590 --> 00:16:55,258
Well, did you pour water down it?
321
00:16:55,342 --> 00:16:57,678
- No, I didn't pour water down it!
- Don't yell at me!
322
00:16:57,761 --> 00:16:59,388
- You're undermining me!
- No, I'm not!
323
00:16:59,471 --> 00:17:00,681
- The hell you're not!
- I'm not!
324
00:17:00,764 --> 00:17:02,391
Why the fuck would I pour water down it?
325
00:17:02,474 --> 00:17:04,351
- What is it?!
- You're on the side of the TV!
326
00:17:05,018 --> 00:17:09,064
No one is on the side of the TV.
How could this happen?
327
00:17:09,815 --> 00:17:11,316
I know what happened.
328
00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:15,153
- I know exactly what happened here.
- [softly] Play dead or you will be.
329
00:17:15,237 --> 00:17:19,700
[Frank] That slick son of a bitch
down at the TV store sold me a lemon!
330
00:17:19,783 --> 00:17:22,661
[sighs]
Oh, you're so lucky.
331
00:17:22,745 --> 00:17:26,623
[men grunting] Goddamn Korean-rubbed
piece of shit. [barking]
332
00:17:27,750 --> 00:17:29,710
[Frank] Major, you're
not going anywhere.
333
00:17:29,793 --> 00:17:32,588
Get back inside, you stupid maniac!
334
00:17:32,671 --> 00:17:34,506
You need some help, Frank?
335
00:17:35,131 --> 00:17:38,051
- Everything's fine.
- His new TV's on the fritz!
336
00:17:38,134 --> 00:17:41,096
- Goddamn it, Goomer.
- Well, let me help you out, buddy!
337
00:17:41,179 --> 00:17:42,931
Hold that thought.
338
00:17:44,974 --> 00:17:47,018
- I like your shorts.
- I know.
339
00:17:47,102 --> 00:17:49,646
One, two, three, lift!
340
00:17:49,730 --> 00:17:51,706
All right. Here we go.
341
00:17:51,741 --> 00:17:54,047
Keep on truckin', chief.
342
00:17:55,944 --> 00:17:58,947
I'll be back in a second.
I have to go burn this shirt.
343
00:17:59,030 --> 00:18:02,284
[man on TV] Feminist Focus,
with your host, Jim Jeffords.
344
00:18:02,367 --> 00:18:06,037
Thank you for joining us, ladies.
May I say, you all look super hot.
345
00:18:06,121 --> 00:18:07,747
You ever think people
would listen to your
346
00:18:07,748 --> 00:18:09,374
opinions more if you brushed your hair?
347
00:18:09,458 --> 00:18:10,793
You...
[static hissing]
348
00:18:11,835 --> 00:18:13,253
There you have it. A lemon.
349
00:18:13,336 --> 00:18:16,298
So, uh... how we gonna
do this? Refund, new set?
350
00:18:16,381 --> 00:18:19,384
So what happened here?
Pour water down the back?
351
00:18:19,468 --> 00:18:22,033
Why do people keep asking
me that? Why on earth would
352
00:18:22,034 --> 00:18:24,598
I pour water down the back
of my own television set?
353
00:18:24,681 --> 00:18:27,601
- OK, look, sir...
- You call me "sir" like you mean it.
354
00:18:27,684 --> 00:18:31,271
This TV worked perfectly when it left
the store, so we're not responsible.
355
00:18:31,354 --> 00:18:35,191
Not responsible?
I spent $640 on this thing.
356
00:18:35,275 --> 00:18:37,820
Then you should've sprung the extra
five on the warranty. [chortles]
357
00:18:37,903 --> 00:18:39,988
Let me tell you something,
you goddamn son of a bitch.
358
00:18:40,071 --> 00:18:42,866
- Now, Frank...
- "Now Frank, now Frank" nothing!
359
00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:45,097
I am gonna speak! You
think you can put on
360
00:18:45,098 --> 00:18:46,995
slacks and talk to a
grown man like that?
361
00:18:47,079 --> 00:18:50,159
Well, do ya? This is
not how business is done.
362
00:18:50,194 --> 00:18:52,446
I am a customer of this
store of long standing.
363
00:18:52,481 --> 00:18:54,669
I bought a radio back
here when there was no TV
364
00:18:54,753 --> 00:18:56,838
and you, sir, were still
in your dad's balls!
365
00:18:56,922 --> 00:18:59,465
[shouting] Now I have been wronged
in this transaction! Get off of me!
366
00:18:59,549 --> 00:19:02,635
I have been wronged in this
transaction and I have 14 people,
367
00:19:02,719 --> 00:19:05,471
an entire cul-de-sac,
coming to my home tonight
368
00:19:05,555 --> 00:19:07,807
to watch the fight on
my color television!
369
00:19:07,891 --> 00:19:10,060
So you need to rectify this situation!
370
00:19:10,143 --> 00:19:11,937
Now what do you plan on doing about it?
371
00:19:12,812 --> 00:19:13,855
Tell you what I can do.
372
00:19:15,273 --> 00:19:20,445
I'll hold the door open for you so
you can carry it back to the car.
373
00:19:22,989 --> 00:19:25,867
Maybe you should've gotten the warranty.
374
00:19:25,951 --> 00:19:28,036
[growling]
375
00:19:28,120 --> 00:19:31,581
If they didn't sell us a lemon and
you didn't break it, then who did?
376
00:19:31,664 --> 00:19:33,583
Oh, Sue, I don't know who...
377
00:19:35,252 --> 00:19:37,212
Those fuckin' animals.
378
00:19:38,921 --> 00:19:41,799
You kids either really think I'm
dumb, or you don't respect me.
379
00:19:41,883 --> 00:19:43,926
- Or both.
- Thanks, honey, I got this.
380
00:19:44,010 --> 00:19:45,782
That TV was fine when it left the store,
381
00:19:45,783 --> 00:19:47,555
and I sure as hell didn't break it!
382
00:19:47,638 --> 00:19:51,210
- Now one of you did!
- And whoever it was, I want you to know
383
00:19:51,245 --> 00:19:53,561
that thanks to you, your
father went to that TV store
384
00:19:53,644 --> 00:19:56,902
- and made a fool of himself.
- Oh, OK, Sue, thank you.
385
00:19:56,937 --> 00:19:59,128
No, they need to hear
this. Your poor father
386
00:19:59,129 --> 00:20:01,319
made himself look like
a lunatic because of you.
387
00:20:01,403 --> 00:20:04,355
- Jesus Christ, Sue.
- And now, he has to watch
388
00:20:04,390 --> 00:20:07,742
the fight at Vic's while the
whole neighborhood laughs at him!
389
00:20:07,825 --> 00:20:12,372
They got it! Nobody is leaving this
couch until I know who did this.
390
00:20:12,455 --> 00:20:15,041
- Did you break my TV?
- It wasn't me, Daddy.
391
00:20:15,124 --> 00:20:18,127
Ah, I know it wasn't, princess.
You can go.
392
00:20:18,211 --> 00:20:21,130
- Can you give me a quarter for ice cream?
- I don't have one.
393
00:20:22,465 --> 00:20:24,033
- Did you break my TV?
- No.
394
00:20:24,217 --> 00:20:25,660
- Did you break my TV?
- No.
395
00:20:25,843 --> 00:20:27,145
- Did he break my TV?
- No.
396
00:20:27,429 --> 00:20:29,038
- Did he break my TV?!
- No.
397
00:20:29,222 --> 00:20:32,058
- Who broke my TV?
- We don't know.
398
00:20:32,141 --> 00:20:34,227
One of you is a liar. Are you a liar?
399
00:20:34,310 --> 00:20:35,770
- Didn't do it!
- All right.
400
00:20:35,853 --> 00:20:37,897
So that's how it's gonna be?
Very well.
401
00:20:37,980 --> 00:20:39,566
We will sit here all day
402
00:20:39,648 --> 00:20:42,818
until one of you respects
us enough to tell the truth.
403
00:20:50,409 --> 00:20:52,704
- Dad...
- I did it. I broke your new TV.
404
00:20:52,787 --> 00:20:54,330
- You did?
- Yeah, it was me.
405
00:20:54,413 --> 00:20:56,582
Ah-ha! I knew it!
How?
406
00:20:56,666 --> 00:20:58,250
I poured water down it.
407
00:20:58,334 --> 00:21:01,962
[sputters] Poured water... Why the
hell would you pour water down it?!
408
00:21:02,046 --> 00:21:04,757
I'll tell you why. 'Cause you
got no respect, that's why.
409
00:21:04,841 --> 00:21:07,593
Oh, yeah? Well guess what,
genius? I didn't do it!
410
00:21:07,677 --> 00:21:10,346
You didn't? Then why the hell
would you tell me you did?!
411
00:21:10,429 --> 00:21:13,140
Because I fucking hate you!
[gasps]
412
00:21:16,894 --> 00:21:18,229
[door slams]
413
00:21:21,899 --> 00:21:23,568
[softly] Frank?
414
00:21:27,196 --> 00:21:28,781
[airplane soars above]
415
00:21:32,034 --> 00:21:33,911
[gas hissing]
416
00:21:36,330 --> 00:21:37,373
[coughing]
417
00:21:40,209 --> 00:21:42,754
[hacking, gagging]
418
00:21:45,089 --> 00:21:47,633
You have something you want to tell me?
419
00:21:49,886 --> 00:21:51,470
[sniffling]
420
00:21:51,554 --> 00:21:53,890
I'm sorry, Dad. I didn't mean it.
421
00:21:53,972 --> 00:21:56,392
I can't look at you right now.
I might kill you.
422
00:21:56,475 --> 00:21:59,854
It's not so much that you broke
my TV. It's that you lied to me.
423
00:21:59,937 --> 00:22:02,106
We are taking you right
down to that store,
424
00:22:02,189 --> 00:22:04,609
and you are gonna march
right up to that salesman
425
00:22:04,692 --> 00:22:06,444
and apologize for what you did,
426
00:22:06,527 --> 00:22:10,030
and for making your
father humiliate himself.
427
00:22:10,114 --> 00:22:12,784
There were so many people
we knew in that store.
428
00:22:12,867 --> 00:22:15,578
Oh, Sue, for the love of Christ!
429
00:22:20,458 --> 00:22:24,420
So I kicked the guy's ass, jumped
into my car, and I got to the
430
00:22:24,421 --> 00:22:28,382
Civic right as Grand Funk was
taking the stage. It was insane.
431
00:22:28,466 --> 00:22:30,967
Just another page out
of my life journey.
432
00:22:31,051 --> 00:22:34,346
Did a bum shit in your mouth?
[door opens, closes]
433
00:22:38,058 --> 00:22:40,519
- Can I help you?
- Um, my dad told me to...
434
00:22:42,354 --> 00:22:43,755
I know who your old man is.
435
00:22:43,756 --> 00:22:45,858
That's the guy who poured
water in the Sonabishi.
436
00:22:45,942 --> 00:22:47,485
He didn't pour water in it.
437
00:22:47,568 --> 00:22:51,322
He sent you here to give me the sob
story? Too chicken to face me, huh?
438
00:22:51,405 --> 00:22:53,198
He's not chicken. I just...
439
00:22:53,282 --> 00:22:56,243
Nice old man you got there, sending
a kid to bitch and moan for him.
440
00:22:56,327 --> 00:22:58,496
Unbelievable. Now get outta here.
441
00:22:58,579 --> 00:23:01,081
Go tell your dad he's a
bigger punk than I thought.
442
00:23:01,165 --> 00:23:04,794
Or just stand there pissing
yourself, makes no difference to me.
443
00:23:05,753 --> 00:23:07,692
Did I tell you how
the Army didn't take me
444
00:23:07,693 --> 00:23:09,632
because they said my dick was too big?
445
00:23:09,715 --> 00:23:11,592
I mean, I can't help it.
I can't help what I got.
446
00:23:11,676 --> 00:23:15,095
Not complaining about it, but really
wanted to fight for our country.
447
00:23:15,179 --> 00:23:18,683
[man on TV] Hey, Luger!
You're one dead gringo.
448
00:23:18,766 --> 00:23:21,101
Oh, is that so, Escobar?
449
00:23:21,185 --> 00:23:26,231
Sí. Are you going to run, or do you
got the cajones to stand and fight?
450
00:23:26,315 --> 00:23:28,233
Well, sometimes a man's gotta do...
451
00:23:28,317 --> 00:23:29,902
- what a man does.
- What a man does.
452
00:23:29,986 --> 00:23:31,821
[distorted static]
453
00:23:33,113 --> 00:23:36,158
[gunfire]
Ay, Chihuahua!
454
00:23:38,786 --> 00:23:39,954
[audio sizzling]
455
00:23:46,627 --> 00:23:49,380
[static hissing]
456
00:23:51,966 --> 00:23:55,643
- I ain't buying this piece of shit.
- What the fuck is this?
457
00:23:56,303 --> 00:24:00,182
Jesus, Chuck, what in the hell
is wrong with all these TVs?
458
00:24:00,265 --> 00:24:03,477
[stammers] I don't know, Dad. We
never had a problem with these before.
459
00:24:03,561 --> 00:24:07,523
Well, we sure as shit do now!
I mean, Christ, they're all defective!
460
00:24:07,606 --> 00:24:10,442
Pull the receipts of
everyone we sold these to.
461
00:24:10,526 --> 00:24:13,612
Uh, excuse me, sir.
My dad bought one of those.
462
00:24:14,947 --> 00:24:17,073
The Pattonhouse is a better model.
463
00:24:17,157 --> 00:24:20,494
The Sonabishi is good, but we
must've got a bad bunch from overseas.
464
00:24:20,578 --> 00:24:23,414
Those Orientals don't do good
work. Their hands are too small.
465
00:24:23,497 --> 00:24:26,500
Again, my apologies for
the defective product.
466
00:24:26,584 --> 00:24:31,589
- And...
- Sorry I raised my voice to you, sir.
467
00:24:31,672 --> 00:24:34,675
Uh... OK. Thank you.
468
00:24:39,013 --> 00:24:41,473
- What happened in there?
- Well...
469
00:24:41,557 --> 00:24:45,212
I know what happened.
I know exactly what happened.
470
00:24:45,728 --> 00:24:47,730
I finally won one! I won!
471
00:24:47,813 --> 00:24:51,149
[yelling] You hear that, world?
Frank Murphy's not a loser!
472
00:24:51,233 --> 00:24:52,860
Frank Murphy's a wi...
[horn blaring]
473
00:24:52,944 --> 00:24:55,227
[Frank] Whoa! Watch it!
474
00:24:55,446 --> 00:24:57,949
Ha-ha!
Those Koreans'll never kill me!
475
00:24:58,282 --> 00:25:00,284
[male announcer] And the
fighters are approaching the ring!
476
00:25:00,366 --> 00:25:02,953
You can cut the excitement with
a knife! [indistinct chatter]
477
00:25:03,037 --> 00:25:04,872
Hey, here we go, here we go!
478
00:25:04,955 --> 00:25:06,874
[announcer] Shavers and Ireland
meet in the center of the ring
479
00:25:06,957 --> 00:25:08,042
for the traditional greeting.
480
00:25:08,125 --> 00:25:10,878
[man] There's something kind
of red there on Mickey's face.
481
00:25:10,961 --> 00:25:12,796
Oh, my God, is he bleeding already?
482
00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:16,050
I'll tell you, Ernie, he was
wearing a turtleneck earlier.
483
00:25:16,133 --> 00:25:18,384
Those are tough to get
off at this altitude.
484
00:25:18,468 --> 00:25:21,555
Hey, your hero Vic is over
there watching it alone.
485
00:25:23,515 --> 00:25:25,600
[scoffs] Some party.
486
00:25:26,552 --> 00:25:28,720
[announcer] We don't hold out many
hopes for the challenger tonight,
487
00:25:28,803 --> 00:25:32,307
- but he keeps on coming.
- Yeah, poor guy.
488
00:25:33,058 --> 00:25:35,643
- Hey, where do you think you're going?
- Uh...
489
00:25:35,727 --> 00:25:38,105
- Finish my science project.
- No, you're not.
490
00:25:38,188 --> 00:25:40,357
Come over here and watch the
fight with the rest of the men.
491
00:25:40,441 --> 00:25:43,026
- Really?
- Yeah, really.
492
00:25:44,319 --> 00:25:46,238
[bell clangs]
[Frank] OK, here we go! Here we go!
493
00:25:46,321 --> 00:25:48,574
[excited chatter]
494
00:25:49,699 --> 00:25:52,750
One sip. Don't tell your mother.
495
00:25:53,619 --> 00:25:55,080
[announcer chatters indistinctly]
496
00:25:55,163 --> 00:25:57,291
Oh, no, they gotta stop this.
497
00:25:57,374 --> 00:26:00,043
[Frank] That's it, Mickey, that's it,
let him punch himself out!
498
00:26:00,127 --> 00:26:01,669
[announcer] And there
goes the mouthpiece!
499
00:26:01,753 --> 00:26:04,798
Oh, it's gonna be a long and
painful night for the Irishman!
500
00:26:04,881 --> 00:26:07,468
[crickets chirring]
501
00:26:07,593 --> 00:26:10,804
[phone ringing]
[Frank] Ah, shit.
502
00:26:12,638 --> 00:26:16,101
- Does it ever fail?
- Just answer it.
503
00:26:16,184 --> 00:26:18,895
Goddamn it. This better be good.
504
00:26:20,730 --> 00:26:22,149
He's dead?
505
00:26:22,816 --> 00:26:26,987
[stammers] OK. Yeah, of course.
Of course, yeah.
506
00:26:27,070 --> 00:26:29,739
- Who died?
- My boss, Ed.
507
00:26:29,823 --> 00:26:33,452
- There was an accident at the airport.
- Oh, my God, are you serious?
508
00:26:33,535 --> 00:26:36,330
They want me to come in early
tomorrow to cover his shift.
509
00:26:36,413 --> 00:26:39,833
Sue, I think I just got
promoted to management.
510
00:26:39,916 --> 00:26:41,168
I think you did, too.
511
00:26:41,251 --> 00:26:44,004
You know what? I think our
luck is finally turning around.
512
00:26:44,087 --> 00:26:45,922
Jesus, Frank, a man is dead.
513
00:26:46,006 --> 00:26:48,925
- Yeah, but he was kind of a dick.
- Frank!
514
00:26:49,009 --> 00:26:51,761
You know, if this had happened a
week ago, we could've got a bigger TV.
515
00:26:51,845 --> 00:26:54,348
- Frank!
- [Kevin] Guys, I'm trying to sleep!
516
00:26:54,431 --> 00:26:57,091
[Frank shouts] Then close
your eyes and shut the fuck up!
517
00:26:57,126 --> 00:26:58,435
[crickets chirring]
518
00:27:01,415 --> 00:27:04,665
[music]
519
00:27:26,087 --> 00:27:27,506
[gunshot]
[casing clatters]