1
00:00:08,055 --> 00:00:10,232
♪ Forty-five bottles
of trust on the wall ♪
2
00:00:10,233 --> 00:00:11,684
♪ Forty-five bottles of trust ♪
3
00:00:11,767 --> 00:00:13,436
♪ Take one down, pass it around ♪
4
00:00:13,519 --> 00:00:15,479
♪ Forty-four bottles of trust
On the wall ♪
5
00:00:15,563 --> 00:00:18,524
♪ On the wall ♪
6
00:00:18,607 --> 00:00:20,943
Dear God, you let me
survive Korea for this?
7
00:00:21,027 --> 00:00:23,821
Oh, Frank, if that's gonna be
your attitude the whole time,
8
00:00:23,904 --> 00:00:27,408
- you might not survive this bus ride.
- You're right, honey.
9
00:00:27,491 --> 00:00:28,743
I want our marriage to get better,
10
00:00:28,826 --> 00:00:31,370
and I'll do whatever I can
to make this weekend work.
11
00:00:31,454 --> 00:00:33,748
And I'm sorry I said this bus was worse
12
00:00:33,831 --> 00:00:36,083
than the rice-eating commies
trying to kill me.
13
00:00:37,043 --> 00:00:38,502
Thank you, Frank.
14
00:00:38,586 --> 00:00:40,171
That's a start.
15
00:00:41,505 --> 00:00:43,215
Well, I don't know about you,
16
00:00:43,299 --> 00:00:46,343
but all those bottles of trust
have me ready to burst.
17
00:00:46,427 --> 00:00:48,220
I hope there's a bathroom around here.
18
00:00:48,304 --> 00:00:50,431
There's a rest stop
just around the bend at exit 37.
19
00:00:50,514 --> 00:00:53,267
Take the service road past
the ranger station and it's on the left.
20
00:00:53,350 --> 00:00:55,102
It's very quiet. No cops.
21
00:00:55,186 --> 00:00:57,063
That's my Greg!
22
00:00:57,146 --> 00:00:59,440
He's like my own personal auto club.
23
00:01:05,613 --> 00:01:08,491
Father, Sue and I really want
to fix our marriage.
24
00:01:08,574 --> 00:01:11,077
As soon as we get to the lake, could you
start doing whatever it is you do?
25
00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:13,454
You know, like, pray,
take out that smoke thing,
26
00:01:13,537 --> 00:01:15,039
fling that water hammer you got?
27
00:01:15,122 --> 00:01:18,959
Oh, Frank, I'm not a wizard
with a wand and magic spells.
28
00:01:19,043 --> 00:01:20,711
That's the stuff of fairy tales.
29
00:01:20,795 --> 00:01:23,172
I'm a priest of our Lord, Jesus Christ,
30
00:01:23,255 --> 00:01:25,633
who was born of a virgin
and walked on water.
31
00:01:26,425 --> 00:01:28,219
The only solution for you and Sue
32
00:01:28,302 --> 00:01:31,972
is to engage each other
and share your deepest feelings.
33
00:01:32,056 --> 00:01:34,642
In front of people? I'm not doing that!
34
00:01:34,725 --> 00:01:38,187
See? You're already making progress!
35
00:01:38,270 --> 00:01:40,940
You just shared a very deep feeling.
36
00:01:41,482 --> 00:01:44,193
- Absolute panic!
- I know!
37
00:01:54,495 --> 00:01:57,540
♪ Come and get your love ♪
38
00:01:59,917 --> 00:02:02,962
♪ Come and get your love ♪
39
00:02:04,088 --> 00:02:05,548
♪ Come and get your love ♪
40
00:02:08,467 --> 00:02:10,845
♪ Come and get your love ♪
41
00:02:12,221 --> 00:02:14,223
♪ Come and get your love
Come and get your love ♪
42
00:02:14,306 --> 00:02:15,808
♪ Come and get your love now ♪
43
00:02:17,184 --> 00:02:18,936
♪ Come and get your love
Come and get your love ♪
44
00:02:19,019 --> 00:02:20,229
♪ Come and get your love now ♪
45
00:02:21,439 --> 00:02:23,065
♪ Come and get your love
Come and get your love ♪
46
00:02:23,149 --> 00:02:24,942
♪ Come and get your love now ♪
47
00:02:26,152 --> 00:02:27,695
♪ Come and get your love
Come and get your love ♪
48
00:02:27,778 --> 00:02:29,238
♪ Come and get your love now ♪
49
00:02:29,422 --> 00:02:32,241
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
50
00:02:32,324 --> 00:02:34,702
♪ It's a puppy dog, cotton candy day ♪
51
00:02:34,785 --> 00:02:38,998
All right, the Sunday Funday
Corey Mars-athon continues.
52
00:02:39,081 --> 00:02:43,252
♪ Eating cotton candy
And thinking of Christy ♪
53
00:02:43,335 --> 00:02:45,588
This fucking station sucks now.
54
00:02:46,839 --> 00:02:49,175
This sounds like ass,
but at least they mean it.
55
00:02:49,258 --> 00:02:51,886
Bet that tuba player
gets miles of pussy.
56
00:03:00,561 --> 00:03:04,231
What It Is
with your host Jim Jeffords.
57
00:03:04,315 --> 00:03:05,691
My guest this Sunday morning
58
00:03:05,774 --> 00:03:07,985
is Chairman
of the Black Liberation Alliance
59
00:03:08,068 --> 00:03:11,071
for Black Liberation,
Tecumseh X Du Bois.
60
00:03:11,155 --> 00:03:14,658
May I ask what was wrong with
your birth name, Jefferson Davis?
61
00:03:14,742 --> 00:03:17,828
I got rid of my slave name
when I was falsely incarcerated
62
00:03:17,912 --> 00:03:20,706
and had my dignity
stripped away by whitey.
63
00:03:20,789 --> 00:03:24,293
I can relate. I was once bumped
from a squash court by Whitey Ford.
64
00:03:24,376 --> 00:03:28,672
The only avenue to right an injustice
is through armed action.
65
00:03:28,756 --> 00:03:30,716
If I had wrongfully imprisoned someone,
66
00:03:30,799 --> 00:03:33,260
I'd be very scared right now.
67
00:03:33,344 --> 00:03:34,220
Oh...
68
00:03:34,303 --> 00:03:35,763
Good morning, dumb-dumb.
69
00:03:35,846 --> 00:03:38,015
Ah, shut the curtains!
Shut the curtains!
70
00:03:38,098 --> 00:03:41,101
What are you,
the world's first pussy vampire?
71
00:03:41,185 --> 00:03:42,770
It's none of your business.
72
00:03:42,853 --> 00:03:46,065
I get it.
Jimmy Fitzsimmons is gonna kill you
73
00:03:46,148 --> 00:03:48,692
for fingering him
for that hockey stick you stole.
74
00:03:48,776 --> 00:03:52,071
How did you know that?
Can you read minds, too?
75
00:03:52,154 --> 00:03:56,867
No, I'm doing something harder:
reading Jimmy's penmanship.
76
00:03:58,869 --> 00:04:00,913
Let's dig him up and take his belt.
77
00:04:00,996 --> 00:04:03,123
And I can wear his face for Halloween!
78
00:04:03,207 --> 00:04:05,876
Get out of here, you guys!
I'm trying not to be seen!
79
00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:08,784
- Ah! It's Zombie Bill!
- Ah!
80
00:04:09,004 --> 00:04:10,381
I'm not dead.
81
00:04:10,464 --> 00:04:13,175
There's only one way to prove it.
82
00:04:13,259 --> 00:04:14,885
Ow! My balls!
83
00:04:14,969 --> 00:04:17,054
Does that mean he's alive?
84
00:04:17,137 --> 00:04:20,182
I forget.
Let's pee on him to be sure.
85
00:04:20,266 --> 00:04:21,559
Get out of here!
86
00:04:21,642 --> 00:04:22,601
Ah!
87
00:04:31,402 --> 00:04:35,364
Welcome to our first morning
of "Pray Away the Hurt."
88
00:04:35,447 --> 00:04:38,492
God has provided us with a lovely day
89
00:04:38,576 --> 00:04:42,413
and also with Ginny and Greg,
our biggest success story,
90
00:04:42,496 --> 00:04:44,415
who are our senior counselors.
91
00:04:44,498 --> 00:04:45,916
Thank you, Father.
92
00:04:46,458 --> 00:04:48,460
Frank, Sue,
93
00:04:48,544 --> 00:04:50,004
Jan, Clark,
94
00:04:50,087 --> 00:04:53,841
you've taken a very brave step
by coming here today.
95
00:04:53,924 --> 00:04:56,051
One that will save your marriage,
96
00:04:56,135 --> 00:04:58,429
just like it saved Greg and me.
97
00:04:58,512 --> 00:05:03,100
All with the loving help
of our Lord, Jesus.
98
00:05:03,183 --> 00:05:05,978
Oh, you've got a swimmer's body.
99
00:05:07,896 --> 00:05:08,939
Sorry.
100
00:05:09,607 --> 00:05:10,941
Go ahead, honey.
101
00:05:11,025 --> 00:05:15,362
Before we found the light,
it felt like our marriage was finished.
102
00:05:15,446 --> 00:05:18,574
But with the help of Father Pat,
Greg opened up.
103
00:05:18,657 --> 00:05:22,786
He came to me in tears
and I'll never forget how he said it,
104
00:05:22,870 --> 00:05:29,293
"Ginny, I love you, but I'm gay...ning
too much weight from your cooking."
105
00:05:29,376 --> 00:05:31,086
That's what I said!
106
00:05:31,170 --> 00:05:36,091
I was hurt, but I accepted it,
and I accepted him.
107
00:05:36,175 --> 00:05:40,179
Now, he goes out every night
and finds his own dinner.
108
00:05:40,262 --> 00:05:45,059
And he comes home in a great mood,
with a hot meal in his tummy,
109
00:05:45,142 --> 00:05:50,522
and all is right in the world
of Ginny and Greg Throater.
110
00:05:51,231 --> 00:05:53,359
Now, let's go around the circle,
111
00:05:53,442 --> 00:05:56,445
and each of you tell us
how you're feeling.
112
00:05:56,528 --> 00:05:58,822
I am feeling
like killing myself right now.
113
00:05:58,906 --> 00:06:00,949
Frank, you can do this.
114
00:06:01,033 --> 00:06:02,117
Take baby steps.
115
00:06:02,201 --> 00:06:04,912
No one's expecting you to bare your soul.
116
00:06:06,663 --> 00:06:11,001
My doctor says my vagina has
calcium deposits resembling teeth.
117
00:06:11,085 --> 00:06:12,419
- Oh, Jesus.
- Wow.
118
00:06:13,003 --> 00:06:13,879
Ouchy.
119
00:06:16,382 --> 00:06:20,844
Bonsoir, party animals!
Hey, my main man!
120
00:06:21,428 --> 00:06:24,264
My half man! My ice man!
121
00:06:24,932 --> 00:06:26,600
Holy shit, Kevin.
122
00:06:26,683 --> 00:06:29,937
Every DJ from the KWOCK
is gonna see us play today.
123
00:06:30,020 --> 00:06:33,065
- Black Bob from Baltimore...
- Wicked Warren Ullnee.
124
00:06:33,148 --> 00:06:34,566
And that's David Bowie!
125
00:06:34,650 --> 00:06:36,693
Oh, wait, it's just a sick lady.
126
00:06:37,486 --> 00:06:38,821
Kevin, come on, get ready.
127
00:06:38,904 --> 00:06:41,073
We want to go over early
and finish off people's drinks
128
00:06:41,156 --> 00:06:42,866
before they throw cigarettes in them.
129
00:06:42,950 --> 00:06:46,870
Look, there's something
I got to tell you guys.
130
00:06:46,954 --> 00:06:49,373
It's been really weighing on me.
131
00:06:49,456 --> 00:06:52,459
Vic's throwing this party
for his girlfriend, right?
132
00:06:52,543 --> 00:06:54,837
- Well...
- Oh, man, she's so hot!
133
00:06:54,920 --> 00:06:58,841
Oh, I'd give a thousand guys
a thousand hand jobs just to bone her!
134
00:06:58,924 --> 00:07:03,429
Wait. Is that one hand job each
or a thousand hand jobs per guy?
135
00:07:03,512 --> 00:07:06,939
- One each! I'm not a fairy!
- I can't talk to you jerks!
136
00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:09,351
I feel like I'm being ripped apart!
137
00:07:09,435 --> 00:07:12,813
- I don't think I can do this gig!
- Oh, you are doing it!
138
00:07:12,896 --> 00:07:16,108
This is our big chance
and you're not gonna let us down.
139
00:07:16,191 --> 00:07:20,404
Now, grow some balls
and put on your fucking eye liner!
140
00:07:25,117 --> 00:07:26,493
I'm here with Reid Harrison,
141
00:07:26,577 --> 00:07:29,204
host of the sixth annual
Colt Luger Pro Am.
142
00:07:29,288 --> 00:07:32,291
So, Reid, what should we expect
from Colt Luger this year?
143
00:07:32,374 --> 00:07:34,543
I don't know.
I don't write that crap.
144
00:07:34,626 --> 00:07:36,086
I don't even do my own stunts.
145
00:07:36,170 --> 00:07:38,088
A Chinaman in a wig
does them for me.
146
00:07:38,172 --> 00:07:41,508
The way you pronounce his name
is by dropping a tray of silverware.
147
00:07:41,592 --> 00:07:43,552
Hey, sweetheart, another one.
148
00:07:43,635 --> 00:07:46,388
ABS apologizes for Reid's behavior.
149
00:07:46,472 --> 00:07:47,723
He hasn't been himself.
150
00:07:47,806 --> 00:07:50,726
His Malibu steakhouse
collapsed into the ocean yesterday.
151
00:07:50,809 --> 00:07:51,727
Where's your brother?
152
00:07:51,810 --> 00:07:54,438
He was supposed to deliver
these papers hours ago!
153
00:07:54,521 --> 00:07:59,152
- Uh, he's not here.
- Yeah, and I'm Spiro T. Agnew.
154
00:07:59,485 --> 00:08:02,613
Hey! I know you can hear me,
you little red-headed fuck!
155
00:08:02,696 --> 00:08:05,282
I'll deliver these,
but it's coming out of your pay.
156
00:08:06,033 --> 00:08:10,753
You don't mess with Randy! All right?
Randy will kill a kid!
157
00:08:17,002 --> 00:08:18,795
Oh, man. Jimmy's gonna kill me!
158
00:08:18,796 --> 00:08:20,589
Then Randy's gonna kill me!
159
00:08:20,672 --> 00:08:24,101
I'll be dead twice!
What do I do, Maureen?
160
00:08:26,470 --> 00:08:29,723
Well, maybe you can start
by apologizing to Phillip.
161
00:08:29,807 --> 00:08:31,642
That way you can die
in each other's arms.
162
00:08:31,725 --> 00:08:32,935
Shut up!
163
00:08:37,356 --> 00:08:38,941
Oh, shit.
164
00:08:40,484 --> 00:08:41,318
Hey, Bill.
165
00:08:42,986 --> 00:08:48,200
I, uh, I thought you... might like this.
166
00:08:48,283 --> 00:08:51,078
Ooh, Willie Stargell.
167
00:08:51,161 --> 00:08:52,579
Are you sure?
168
00:08:53,997 --> 00:08:54,998
I'm sure.
169
00:08:55,624 --> 00:08:57,334
Thanks.
170
00:09:00,128 --> 00:09:02,965
Why is all your furniture covered
in plastic?
171
00:09:03,048 --> 00:09:07,636
Oh, Nana pees a little bit
when she watches Dialing for Dollars.
172
00:09:08,679 --> 00:09:12,808
Listen, I shouldn't have said some
of that stuff yesterday.
173
00:09:12,891 --> 00:09:15,435
It's okay. I was cruel to you, too.
174
00:09:15,519 --> 00:09:17,813
I disemboweled you in my diary.
175
00:09:17,896 --> 00:09:19,815
What the hell does that mean?
176
00:09:20,148 --> 00:09:21,859
Uh, uh...
177
00:09:23,986 --> 00:09:26,113
Oh...
178
00:09:26,196 --> 00:09:27,114
Agh...
179
00:09:27,197 --> 00:09:31,368
This is how I get my feelings out
when my ears get hot.
180
00:09:36,039 --> 00:09:39,001
Wow, this is really fucked up.
181
00:09:39,084 --> 00:09:41,545
Sometimes I don't remember drawing them.
182
00:09:42,588 --> 00:09:44,506
You're a genius at this stuff!
183
00:09:44,590 --> 00:09:47,593
Maybe you could think of a way
to get Jimmy to leave us alone.
184
00:09:47,676 --> 00:09:51,138
It is a subject I visit on occasion.
185
00:09:53,307 --> 00:09:54,892
Holy shit.
186
00:09:55,893 --> 00:09:58,186
What I wouldn't give for one more chance
187
00:09:58,270 --> 00:10:03,817
to show my dad that I could
safely make homemade fireworks.
188
00:10:05,611 --> 00:10:06,945
It's not your fault, Clark.
189
00:10:07,029 --> 00:10:09,448
He put gun powder in a coffee can, Sue.
190
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:11,617
Oh, my Clarkie.
191
00:10:11,700 --> 00:10:14,286
Clark, you just earned an honesty star.
192
00:10:16,163 --> 00:10:19,750
See? When couples are honest
with each other,
193
00:10:19,833 --> 00:10:21,627
it brings them closer together.
194
00:10:21,710 --> 00:10:24,755
Frank, it's your turn.
Tell us how you're feeling.
195
00:10:24,838 --> 00:10:27,466
- I don't know how I feel.
- Yes, you do.
196
00:10:27,549 --> 00:10:30,510
No, I don't. I was always taught
to keep things to myself.
197
00:10:30,594 --> 00:10:32,262
We didn't burden other people
with our problems.
198
00:10:32,346 --> 00:10:34,014
It was considered impolite.
199
00:10:34,097 --> 00:10:35,891
That was the old way of thinking.
200
00:10:35,974 --> 00:10:38,936
Come on, honey. You can do this.
201
00:10:39,019 --> 00:10:40,604
Frank, how do you feel?
202
00:10:40,687 --> 00:10:43,106
I'm pissed off
you're bugging me about this!
203
00:10:43,190 --> 00:10:44,816
Pissed off. That's an emotion.
204
00:10:44,900 --> 00:10:46,026
It really makes me mad.
205
00:10:46,109 --> 00:10:47,819
Beating the same drum, but that's good.
206
00:10:47,903 --> 00:10:49,821
I feel like you were the kind of kid
that me and my friends
207
00:10:49,905 --> 00:10:52,282
- would have thrown into a pond!
- Okay.
208
00:10:52,366 --> 00:10:55,619
Keep going, Frank. Dig deeper.
Why are you mad?
209
00:10:55,702 --> 00:10:58,121
I'm mad because we had
to come on this thing
210
00:10:58,205 --> 00:10:59,706
to make our marriage better,
211
00:10:59,790 --> 00:11:01,875
but I don't know how the hell
it went bad in the first place.
212
00:11:01,959 --> 00:11:04,795
All I know is everything was great
with us when I had my old job,
213
00:11:04,878 --> 00:11:06,964
and now I'm stuck with you people
in a dumpy cabin
214
00:11:07,047 --> 00:11:08,882
that reeks of deer piss and pipe tobacco,
215
00:11:08,966 --> 00:11:11,009
and all we have is
this cheap, watery peanut butter
216
00:11:11,093 --> 00:11:13,345
you got to stir first
before you put it on the bread!
217
00:11:13,428 --> 00:11:14,596
Where's the goddamn Skippy?
218
00:11:14,680 --> 00:11:17,974
That's good, Frank! Open that door!
219
00:11:18,058 --> 00:11:20,018
How can you say that's good? He's awful.
220
00:11:20,102 --> 00:11:21,978
Me? You married a father killer!
221
00:11:23,980 --> 00:11:26,108
Okay. Close that door a little bit.
222
00:11:28,985 --> 00:11:30,362
Let's take a break, shall we?
223
00:11:30,904 --> 00:11:32,155
I'll make some coffee.
224
00:11:32,239 --> 00:11:33,407
No!
225
00:11:38,662 --> 00:11:41,248
Did you see the ice sculpture
I got just for you?
226
00:11:41,331 --> 00:11:43,709
We can celebrate
the permanence of our love
227
00:11:43,792 --> 00:11:46,169
as we watch it slowly melt away.
228
00:11:46,795 --> 00:11:48,755
Two grand well spent.
229
00:11:50,549 --> 00:11:51,675
I need a drink.
230
00:11:52,175 --> 00:11:54,052
I knew you'd love it!
231
00:11:54,136 --> 00:11:56,471
Out of my way, full-growns!
232
00:11:56,555 --> 00:11:58,348
Here we go. It's almost time.
233
00:11:58,432 --> 00:12:02,394
We'll be so famous after this,
our dicks are gonna be like magnets.
234
00:12:02,936 --> 00:12:05,313
Wouldn't that mean
they'd attract other dicks?
235
00:12:05,397 --> 00:12:07,190
That's not how dick magnets work!
236
00:12:07,274 --> 00:12:09,276
Tonight's your night, Kevin.
237
00:12:09,359 --> 00:12:12,028
You guys are gonna show
these people the truth.
238
00:12:12,112 --> 00:12:14,948
You're so pure,
I wish I could snort you up.
239
00:12:16,533 --> 00:12:19,661
That's so nice of you, Vic,
240
00:12:19,745 --> 00:12:21,872
but... there's something I need to...
241
00:12:21,955 --> 00:12:24,708
Hey, there's my boss!
I didn't invite him.
242
00:12:24,791 --> 00:12:26,793
Guess he always knows
where the party's at.
243
00:12:33,008 --> 00:12:35,761
Guys, today we bully the bully.
244
00:12:35,844 --> 00:12:39,639
We're gonna get Jimmy so good,
he'll never mess with us again.
245
00:12:39,723 --> 00:12:43,560
And he'll move on to bully
someone smaller and weaker than us.
246
00:12:44,144 --> 00:12:47,063
- Thanks for bringing the rope.
- We's happy to oblige.
247
00:12:47,147 --> 00:12:49,149
Just as long
as we get it back to Daddy
248
00:12:49,232 --> 00:12:52,444
so he can have
his happy alone time in his closet.
249
00:12:52,527 --> 00:12:54,863
Okay, let's go over the plan
one more time.
250
00:12:54,946 --> 00:12:55,822
Phillip?
251
00:12:57,699 --> 00:13:00,952
Bill and I will bait Jimmy
with incendiary remarks.
252
00:13:01,036 --> 00:13:04,164
When he gives chase,
you two pull the rope taut,
253
00:13:04,247 --> 00:13:06,875
knocking him off his bike
and into the wagon.
254
00:13:06,958 --> 00:13:10,796
Lady Gravity will carry him downhill
as we pelt him with rocks
255
00:13:10,879 --> 00:13:13,715
on his journey to his final destination,
256
00:13:13,799 --> 00:13:16,176
the construction site port-o-potty.
257
00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:18,720
Then the fecal matter
in his scratch marks
258
00:13:18,804 --> 00:13:21,306
will lead to a severe infection
which will...
259
00:13:21,389 --> 00:13:25,664
Jesus Christ! You got a lot of evil
in that big fucking head!
260
00:13:25,950 --> 00:13:29,214
My mom says
I'm going to grow into it.
261
00:13:31,107 --> 00:13:35,195
Empathy is an important part
of any relationship.
262
00:13:35,278 --> 00:13:39,658
That's why we're going to move on
to an exercise called "role playing."
263
00:13:39,741 --> 00:13:40,617
Ooh.
264
00:13:40,700 --> 00:13:43,245
Greg, let's show everyone
how it's done.
265
00:13:44,913 --> 00:13:47,791
"I'm Greg. I'm so manly.
266
00:13:47,874 --> 00:13:50,919
I build stone walls
with my bare hands,
267
00:13:51,002 --> 00:13:53,380
yet I have the soul of a poet.
268
00:13:53,463 --> 00:13:56,424
And I love my Ginny."
269
00:13:58,718 --> 00:14:02,013
"I'm Ginny.
I'm a beautiful, trusting soul.
270
00:14:02,097 --> 00:14:06,893
I'm a wonderful mother,
and I'm raising two magnificent sons.
271
00:14:06,977 --> 00:14:08,895
And I deserve a real marriage,
272
00:14:08,979 --> 00:14:11,565
not a cheap, hollow imitation!"
273
00:14:12,858 --> 00:14:15,527
Oh, look at those tears of joy!
274
00:14:15,610 --> 00:14:16,570
Excellent.
275
00:14:16,653 --> 00:14:19,114
Frank and Sue, your turn to role play.
276
00:14:19,197 --> 00:14:22,701
Frank, put yourself in Sue's place.
How do you see her?
277
00:14:22,784 --> 00:14:24,077
I've been married too long
278
00:14:24,161 --> 00:14:25,662
to be dumb enough
to answer that question.
279
00:14:26,246 --> 00:14:28,957
Come on, Frank.
This is why we came here.
280
00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:31,168
I know you can do this.
281
00:14:31,251 --> 00:14:32,335
All right.
282
00:14:34,337 --> 00:14:35,172
"I'm Sue.
283
00:14:36,464 --> 00:14:38,049
I'm a good-looking broad and...
284
00:14:38,133 --> 00:14:41,011
I make a decent deviled egg. The end."
285
00:14:41,094 --> 00:14:44,681
Agh... "I'm Frank. I tell Sue
I want to work on our marriage,
286
00:14:44,764 --> 00:14:46,683
but I'm not willing
to go beyond the surface
287
00:14:46,766 --> 00:14:49,186
and say what's really
bothering me about her."
288
00:14:49,269 --> 00:14:51,897
Oh, okay. I see how this works.
It's all my fault.
289
00:14:51,980 --> 00:14:54,816
"I threw a hissy fit at Frank
for working a few extra shifts
290
00:14:54,900 --> 00:14:56,359
while I abandoned my children
291
00:14:56,443 --> 00:14:59,613
just to follow my dream
of drying the world's lettuce."
292
00:15:00,030 --> 00:15:03,825
"I call how my wife puts food
on the table 'her little hobby!'"
293
00:15:03,909 --> 00:15:06,328
"And I remember
every fucking thing Frank ever said
294
00:15:06,411 --> 00:15:08,747
and I keep a list up here
so whenever he fucks up
295
00:15:08,830 --> 00:15:11,249
I can just... Agh, agh, agh!"
296
00:15:11,333 --> 00:15:13,126
Oh, honey, you'll never be like that.
297
00:15:13,210 --> 00:15:15,086
Oh, he will. And you'll turn him into it!
298
00:15:15,170 --> 00:15:17,005
You know how?
With your constant fucking...
299
00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:23,553
Oh, it must make you feel
like a big man to step on my dreams.
300
00:15:23,637 --> 00:15:24,763
We had a deal!
301
00:15:24,846 --> 00:15:27,390
We had another deal.
It was called a marriage vow!
302
00:15:27,474 --> 00:15:29,935
Remember that, Susan?
For better or for worse?
303
00:15:30,018 --> 00:15:33,772
Well, "worse" happened.
I lost my job and how did you support me?
304
00:15:33,855 --> 00:15:36,775
I got a job
to feed the whole goddamn family!
305
00:15:36,858 --> 00:15:39,110
Yeah, a job
where you're doing better than me!
306
00:15:45,784 --> 00:15:47,577
You know what you just did, Frank?
307
00:15:48,495 --> 00:15:49,871
You let us in.
308
00:15:50,455 --> 00:15:51,414
I did.
309
00:15:51,498 --> 00:15:53,500
That's the first step towards healing,
310
00:15:53,583 --> 00:15:56,711
allowing us to see
that beneath your gruff exterior,
311
00:15:56,795 --> 00:15:58,296
you're actually quite sensitive.
312
00:15:59,005 --> 00:16:00,423
I guess I am.
313
00:16:00,507 --> 00:16:02,092
He's actually an asshole.
314
00:16:03,176 --> 00:16:05,262
Jeez, I feel like I'm at home.
315
00:16:07,847 --> 00:16:10,183
The immortal Mort Rosenthal!
316
00:16:10,267 --> 00:16:12,394
Shalom! Welcome to my home.
317
00:16:12,477 --> 00:16:14,604
Help yourself.
The candies are in the bowl,
318
00:16:14,688 --> 00:16:15,897
the Quaaludes are in that bowl.
319
00:16:15,981 --> 00:16:18,733
And if you want to lick a toad,
they're swimming in the sink.
320
00:16:18,817 --> 00:16:21,194
Thank you, but it is the Sabbath.
321
00:16:21,278 --> 00:16:24,614
I actually came here
to give you some bad news.
322
00:16:24,698 --> 00:16:26,366
We're going to have to let you go.
323
00:16:26,449 --> 00:16:27,909
You're firing me?
324
00:16:27,993 --> 00:16:32,414
Let's be honest, Vic. Your drug use
is seriously affecting your performance.
325
00:16:32,497 --> 00:16:34,666
Why are you springing this on me now?
326
00:16:34,749 --> 00:16:38,586
Vic, we've had
this exact conversation five times.
327
00:16:38,670 --> 00:16:40,964
I keep firing you
and you keep showing up.
328
00:16:41,506 --> 00:16:44,551
I need you to clean out your desk
by noon tomorrow.
329
00:16:45,635 --> 00:16:49,055
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have to tell my wife I'm divorcing her.
330
00:16:51,641 --> 00:16:55,145
All right, Vic, now,
time to keep it together for Cutie Pie.
331
00:16:55,228 --> 00:16:56,980
Smile, God damn it!
332
00:17:02,485 --> 00:17:04,446
All right, you swanky fuckers!
333
00:17:04,988 --> 00:17:06,823
Your attention, please!
334
00:17:06,906 --> 00:17:08,199
Get ready to rock.
335
00:17:08,283 --> 00:17:11,202
This special day
is for my special lady,
336
00:17:11,286 --> 00:17:14,414
the love of my life, my Cutie Pie.
337
00:17:14,497 --> 00:17:18,376
You are the apple of my eye,
the thump in my heart,
338
00:17:18,460 --> 00:17:22,047
and the only thing in my life
that keeps me real.
339
00:17:23,631 --> 00:17:26,509
Did you just hear that?
Did everyone else's ears just pop?
340
00:17:26,593 --> 00:17:28,136
Now let's kick off the entertainment.
341
00:17:28,219 --> 00:17:31,514
Coming to the stage
is a power trio of righteous dudes
342
00:17:31,598 --> 00:17:35,101
fronted by a young man
who I've really come to admire.
343
00:17:35,185 --> 00:17:39,064
I'm so happy he's chasing his dream,
and I'm proud to call him my friend.
344
00:17:39,147 --> 00:17:40,732
Mr. Kevin Murphy!
345
00:17:40,815 --> 00:17:42,442
Oh, man.
346
00:17:42,525 --> 00:17:45,278
Tonight he's gonna take us all
to the moon,
347
00:17:45,362 --> 00:17:47,238
unlike those liars at NASA.
348
00:17:47,322 --> 00:17:50,116
Where'd the lunar buggy come from?
They put it together with a wrench?
349
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:51,201
This band's gonna rock!
350
00:17:51,284 --> 00:17:53,870
Crickets make that sound
with their legs. Hey, come on!
351
00:17:53,953 --> 00:17:55,705
Here's Merlin's Monocle!
352
00:17:59,292 --> 00:18:02,212
Thank you, Vic. You're a great guy.
353
00:18:02,712 --> 00:18:03,797
I really mean it.
354
00:18:04,672 --> 00:18:07,634
Let's rock it!
A-one, two, three, four!
355
00:18:16,726 --> 00:18:18,061
Wait, stop!
356
00:18:18,144 --> 00:18:23,024
I can't rock right now
with this burden on my soul.
357
00:18:25,360 --> 00:18:27,904
- Let me borrow this.
- Kevin, what the fuck?
358
00:18:28,780 --> 00:18:32,158
A great man once told me
that when you take the stage,
359
00:18:32,242 --> 00:18:33,952
people see right into your soul.
360
00:18:34,577 --> 00:18:36,413
Man, I'd love to meet that dude.
361
00:18:38,415 --> 00:18:40,250
But my soul is troubled.
362
00:18:40,333 --> 00:18:41,835
There's something I got to say.
363
00:18:42,460 --> 00:18:44,546
This is the only way
I know how to say it.
364
00:18:46,131 --> 00:18:49,801
♪ I was on a search to be a man ♪
365
00:18:49,884 --> 00:18:54,180
♪ Fed up with just
The company of my hand ♪
366
00:18:54,264 --> 00:18:56,683
♪ I finally got laid ♪
367
00:18:57,308 --> 00:19:01,604
♪ But now the piper must be paid ♪
368
00:19:01,688 --> 00:19:03,356
Oh, shit.
369
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:07,235
♪ He must be paid p-p-paid paid
P-p-p-paid paid ♪
370
00:19:07,318 --> 00:19:10,155
♪ P-p-p-paid paid, paid ♪
371
00:19:12,073 --> 00:19:14,117
Pick up your axe!
372
00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:16,202
♪ I'm living a lie ♪
373
00:19:16,286 --> 00:19:19,164
♪ But the hurtful truth is night ♪
374
00:19:19,247 --> 00:19:21,666
He said them toads are in the sink, right?
375
00:19:23,042 --> 00:19:28,465
Thirteen, fourteen, five-teen.
376
00:19:28,548 --> 00:19:29,966
Hey, Jimmy.
377
00:19:31,050 --> 00:19:35,020
I see the pussies
have come for their punishment.
378
00:19:36,347 --> 00:19:39,350
Uh, how'd you get those ears, Jimmy?
379
00:19:39,434 --> 00:19:41,060
Did your dad fuck an elephant?
380
00:19:41,144 --> 00:19:43,438
Are you out of your fucking mind?
381
00:19:43,521 --> 00:19:46,274
Your mother does sex for money.
382
00:19:46,357 --> 00:19:49,360
My mom's never earned
a dollar in her life!
383
00:19:49,444 --> 00:19:52,572
I'm gonna pull your hearts out
through your assholes!
384
00:19:52,655 --> 00:19:54,305
Go!
385
00:19:58,453 --> 00:19:59,370
Now!
386
00:20:00,580 --> 00:20:02,290
Huh?
387
00:20:03,041 --> 00:20:06,652
- Oh, shit.
- It always worked in my kill book.
388
00:20:08,755 --> 00:20:10,340
Nice try, dickweeds!
389
00:20:10,423 --> 00:20:11,466
Ah!
390
00:20:11,549 --> 00:20:16,095
I'm gonna cut your nose off
and shove it up your ass
391
00:20:16,096 --> 00:20:18,846
so you'll go through life smelling...
392
00:20:23,561 --> 00:20:26,143
Oh, man. Not again.
393
00:20:26,898 --> 00:20:30,285
My name is Jimmy Fitzsimmons!
394
00:20:36,324 --> 00:20:38,743
Sue, when I got fired, I lost two jobs:
395
00:20:38,826 --> 00:20:41,037
Mohican and being head of our house.
396
00:20:41,120 --> 00:20:43,915
You go off and get this job,
which is fine.
397
00:20:44,499 --> 00:20:47,669
But then you invent your salad thing.
And it's a really good idea.
398
00:20:47,752 --> 00:20:50,547
It's brilliant. That's why, I don't know,
399
00:20:50,630 --> 00:20:53,383
I guess it bugs me
that my dream's in the past
400
00:20:53,466 --> 00:20:54,759
and yours is ahead of you.
401
00:20:55,343 --> 00:20:57,428
It looks like you're gonna do
a lot better than me.
402
00:20:57,512 --> 00:21:00,932
But as a man, I have to be
doing better, or what am I?
403
00:21:01,015 --> 00:21:03,560
And that's why, I guess, deep down,
404
00:21:03,643 --> 00:21:05,979
in a roundabout way, I was hoping...
405
00:21:07,397 --> 00:21:08,398
that you'd fail.
406
00:21:10,316 --> 00:21:12,819
That was really brave of you
to say that, Frank.
407
00:21:15,071 --> 00:21:16,906
You know, in the book of Job...
408
00:21:16,990 --> 00:21:19,993
- You motherfucker!
- Ow!
409
00:21:20,910 --> 00:21:25,039
♪ She was the girl of the guy next door ♪
410
00:21:26,499 --> 00:21:29,419
♪ And I feel just like a whore ♪
411
00:21:30,044 --> 00:21:32,839
♪ And my torment will never end ♪
412
00:21:32,922 --> 00:21:36,676
♪ Because I hurt a friend ♪
413
00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:40,763
I'm so sorry, Vic.
414
00:21:41,598 --> 00:21:43,308
Wait a sec, wait.
Wait, wait, wait.
415
00:21:43,391 --> 00:21:46,811
Did I understand
that 30-minute song correctly?
416
00:21:46,894 --> 00:21:50,712
Did you two get it on?
417
00:21:50,857 --> 00:21:53,484
You bing-banged Kevin in his basement?
418
00:21:54,027 --> 00:21:55,612
On your water couch.
419
00:21:55,695 --> 00:21:58,740
My couch?
I just had it chlorinated!
420
00:21:58,823 --> 00:22:01,618
- Shit, man!
- Whoa!
421
00:22:02,327 --> 00:22:03,953
Everybody out!
422
00:22:04,037 --> 00:22:06,456
And don't forget to take
your fucking gift bags!
423
00:22:07,957 --> 00:22:11,336
I fucking trusted you,
you backstabbing couch!
424
00:22:13,838 --> 00:22:16,257
What else did you fuck him on,
the TV?
425
00:22:17,467 --> 00:22:18,801
My gold records?
426
00:22:20,261 --> 00:22:21,179
The ceiling?
427
00:22:24,557 --> 00:22:25,391
Time to go.
428
00:22:28,186 --> 00:22:30,355
Push me through!
Push me through!
429
00:22:33,066 --> 00:22:37,200
All right, pull yourself together, Vic.
You can handle this.
430
00:22:37,737 --> 00:22:40,198
Dragon on your shirt.
Dragon on your shirt.
431
00:22:40,281 --> 00:22:43,076
Dragon on your shirt.
Dragon on your shirt, man.
432
00:22:43,660 --> 00:22:45,286
Breathing fire!
433
00:22:52,293 --> 00:22:54,045
Whoo!
434
00:22:54,128 --> 00:22:56,846
I can quit any time I want!
435
00:22:57,382 --> 00:22:59,384
# Lick that pickle, baby #
436
00:22:59,467 --> 00:23:01,552
♪ Pull it from a jar ♪
437
00:23:04,597 --> 00:23:06,182
I think he's dead.
438
00:23:06,265 --> 00:23:09,268
- Better pee on him just to be sure.
- No...
439
00:23:09,352 --> 00:23:10,937
Ah!
440
00:23:11,020 --> 00:23:13,314
He's alive! Run!
441
00:23:13,398 --> 00:23:16,734
Guys, wait!
We got to take him to the hospital!
442
00:23:16,818 --> 00:23:17,985
We ain't going to no doctor.
443
00:23:18,069 --> 00:23:20,071
They want to vassinate us.
444
00:23:20,154 --> 00:23:22,310
I don't like clean needles!
445
00:23:23,449 --> 00:23:24,409
God damn it.
446
00:23:24,492 --> 00:23:27,203
Don't worry, Jimmy.
I won't let you die.
447
00:23:29,497 --> 00:23:30,748
Coma punch.
448
00:23:35,586 --> 00:23:37,880
My name is Bill Murphy,
and my friend had an accident,
449
00:23:37,964 --> 00:23:41,008
and it's all my fault.
I was trying to play a trick on him.
450
00:23:41,092 --> 00:23:43,219
Well, for corn sakes!
We'll take care of him.
451
00:23:43,302 --> 00:23:46,264
Just tell me, what kind of acid
did you pour on his face?
452
00:23:46,347 --> 00:23:48,724
None. That's the way he always looks.
453
00:23:48,808 --> 00:23:51,853
- Oh, dear.
- Fuck you, lady.
454
00:23:52,895 --> 00:23:54,313
I can't believe you!
455
00:23:54,397 --> 00:23:56,649
This is a competition?
456
00:23:56,732 --> 00:23:59,026
That you're trying to win?
457
00:23:59,110 --> 00:24:01,863
You know, I went to a poker night
once without telling Jan and...
458
00:24:01,946 --> 00:24:05,867
Shut up, Clark!
I spent 15 years raising your children,
459
00:24:05,950 --> 00:24:08,265
and the one time I try to do something
460
00:24:08,266 --> 00:24:10,580
that makes me feel good about myself,
461
00:24:10,663 --> 00:24:13,749
you don't want me to get it
because it threatens you?
462
00:24:13,833 --> 00:24:15,835
How could you say that?
463
00:24:15,918 --> 00:24:17,837
You were the one who wanted me
to go deeper, Sue!
464
00:24:17,920 --> 00:24:20,006
Well, congratulations!
465
00:24:20,089 --> 00:24:22,842
You dig for oil,
sometimes you hit a sewer pipe!
466
00:24:22,925 --> 00:24:25,449
And now it's all out there!
467
00:24:28,097 --> 00:24:28,931
So...
468
00:24:31,100 --> 00:24:33,186
who wants to puke up their life next?
469
00:24:39,442 --> 00:24:41,527
I like dick.
470
00:24:42,528 --> 00:24:44,572
- What?
- I like dick, Ginny.
471
00:24:44,655 --> 00:24:47,867
I like looking at it. I like stroking it.
I like sucking it.
472
00:24:47,950 --> 00:24:50,453
You know when I get
that far away look in my eyes?
473
00:24:50,536 --> 00:24:51,913
I'm thinking about dick.
474
00:24:51,996 --> 00:24:54,332
I'm getting aroused now
just talking about it.
475
00:24:54,415 --> 00:24:55,541
I want it.
476
00:24:55,625 --> 00:24:58,586
I want dick more
than I want world peace.
477
00:25:03,508 --> 00:25:07,720
- What are you trying to say?
- I'm a homosexual, Ginny!
478
00:25:07,803 --> 00:25:11,057
I've been living a lie.
And so have you.
479
00:25:11,140 --> 00:25:13,643
I'm so sorry, but that's who I am.
480
00:25:14,727 --> 00:25:18,606
- No, you are not.
- Ginny, listen to me.
481
00:25:18,689 --> 00:25:21,943
Now, I'm gonna go outside
to look at constellations.
482
00:25:22,026 --> 00:25:27,073
You have exactly five minutes
to stop playing this silly game.
483
00:25:27,657 --> 00:25:31,744
- Just divorce me, my darling!
- No way, mister!
484
00:25:41,170 --> 00:25:46,133
Mr. Toad, did I dream that,
or did I really shoot up my house?
485
00:25:46,217 --> 00:25:47,802
No dream. You shot it up.
486
00:25:48,469 --> 00:25:50,596
Ah, shit, man.
487
00:25:51,180 --> 00:25:52,682
Thanks for being honest.
488
00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:20,585
Two new messages.
489
00:26:20,668 --> 00:26:23,004
Sue, it's Vivian.
Tomorrow's the big day.
490
00:26:23,087 --> 00:26:25,006
Henrietta's presenting
the Salad Tosser
491
00:26:25,089 --> 00:26:26,382
at the stockholder's meeting.
492
00:26:26,465 --> 00:26:27,800
Wear something successful.
493
00:26:27,883 --> 00:26:31,846
I'm going with cleavage,
so you show a lot of leg.
494
00:26:31,929 --> 00:26:34,432
Frank, it's Bob Pogo.
495
00:26:34,515 --> 00:26:37,143
Operation Half-Head is a go.
496
00:26:37,810 --> 00:26:41,147
We're getting rid of Scoop tomorrow.
497
00:26:41,230 --> 00:26:44,984
Hey, good luck getting your job back.
I sure hope you don't fail.
498
00:26:45,067 --> 00:26:46,902
See, wasn't that hard, was it?
499
00:26:46,986 --> 00:26:49,280
Oh, here it comes.
Here it comes, the old...
500
00:26:50,698 --> 00:26:53,075
I don't...
you asshole!
501
00:26:53,159 --> 00:26:55,369
The hell you don't!
For 15 years I've had to...
502
00:26:55,453 --> 00:26:58,623
Mom, Dad?
Are you fighting?
503
00:26:58,706 --> 00:26:59,665
Yes!
504
00:27:00,675 --> 00:27:04,629
♪ I was on the search to be a man ♪
505
00:27:04,712 --> 00:27:08,841
♪ Fed up with just
The company of my hand ♪
506
00:27:08,925 --> 00:27:11,344
♪ I finally got laid ♪
507
00:27:12,053 --> 00:27:18,225
♪ And now the piper must be paid ♪
508
00:27:18,309 --> 00:27:22,021
♪ Pay p-pay pay paid ♪
509
00:27:22,104 --> 00:27:25,399
♪ The torment will never end ♪
510
00:27:25,483 --> 00:27:31,447
♪ 'Cause I hurt a friend ♪
511
00:27:31,530 --> 00:27:33,282
I hurt him bad.
512
00:27:34,283 --> 00:27:37,283
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
513
00:27:40,790 --> 00:27:42,667
Pick up your axe!