1 00:00:06,643 --> 00:00:08,803 Giving £15,000 of our money away without telling me is lying. 2 00:00:08,843 --> 00:00:12,923 I wanted to help your brother, not mine, to keep a roof over his family's head. 3 00:00:12,963 --> 00:00:17,483 Catherine dumped me. So I really want her to think I'm, like, "in danger." 4 00:00:17,523 --> 00:00:18,803 That's what this is all about. 5 00:00:18,843 --> 00:00:20,203 If I wasn't married, 6 00:00:20,243 --> 00:00:21,283 if my marriage were in slightly worse shape, 7 00:00:21,323 --> 00:00:23,083 I would totally-- 8 00:00:23,123 --> 00:00:25,123 Olivia's made a rather serious complaint against you. 9 00:00:25,163 --> 00:00:26,843 She no longer feels comfortable working 10 00:00:26,883 --> 00:00:29,363 - in the same environment as you. - What?! 11 00:00:29,403 --> 00:00:32,243 Earlier today-- [laughs] 12 00:00:32,283 --> 00:00:34,843 Do you wanna put the baby down? 13 00:00:37,683 --> 00:00:41,603 [horn honks] 14 00:00:41,643 --> 00:00:44,803 Hey, man. I'm not high. 15 00:00:44,843 --> 00:00:46,883 Great. You mind if I put these in the backseat? 16 00:00:46,923 --> 00:00:49,403 Go ahead. You know what? 17 00:00:49,443 --> 00:00:51,603 I fucked a plus-size model back there last night. 18 00:00:51,643 --> 00:00:55,083 I'm gonna be honest with you. It was a bit of a mess. 19 00:00:58,003 --> 00:01:02,203 Just-- like that, like it was nothing, like, I don't-- 20 00:01:02,243 --> 00:01:03,763 This is crazy. 21 00:01:03,803 --> 00:01:06,203 I don't wanna talk about it in front of Melissa. 22 00:01:06,243 --> 00:01:08,603 Okay, Melissa, could you give us a minute? 23 00:01:08,643 --> 00:01:10,563 And don't call me as a character witness in your sexual harassment trial 24 00:01:10,603 --> 00:01:12,563 because I don't feel I could be very helpful right now. 25 00:01:12,603 --> 00:01:14,203 Melissa, just to get you up to speed here. 26 00:01:14,243 --> 00:01:16,523 - There's no trial. - Don't talk to Melissa. 27 00:01:16,563 --> 00:01:19,643 Okay, I see you're not interested in sane dialogue so I'm gonna go, 28 00:01:19,683 --> 00:01:21,123 but we at least need to arrange a time where-- 29 00:01:21,163 --> 00:01:24,363 - You can email me. - Okay, so when-- 30 00:01:24,403 --> 00:01:26,403 Just email me. 31 00:01:26,443 --> 00:01:28,283 Okay. Is your email address 32 00:01:28,323 --> 00:01:31,723 still "impatient shithead at mean dot jerk"? 33 00:01:31,763 --> 00:01:33,523 Yeah, yeah, it is. 34 00:01:33,563 --> 00:01:35,523 Is yours still 35 00:01:35,563 --> 00:01:38,883 "fat idiot at bad breath dot cunt"? 36 00:01:38,923 --> 00:01:40,363 I don't have bad breath. 37 00:01:40,403 --> 00:01:42,723 Yeah, you do. Melissa, does he have bad breath? 38 00:01:42,763 --> 00:01:44,563 It's just too much coffee, I think. 39 00:01:44,603 --> 00:01:45,963 It's not like halitosis. 40 00:01:46,003 --> 00:01:47,603 You just need to drink more water. 41 00:01:50,083 --> 00:01:52,883 Can you drive? I'm legitimately afraid of her. 42 00:01:52,923 --> 00:01:55,403 I looked in her eyes back there and there's nothing to lose. 43 00:01:55,443 --> 00:01:59,803 Dot cunt. That's awesome. Is that an actual domain name? 44 00:01:59,843 --> 00:02:02,283 Because if it is, I will buy that. 45 00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:04,643 [laughs] 46 00:02:08,243 --> 00:02:10,443 I think this neighborhood could suit us. 47 00:02:10,483 --> 00:02:13,283 Smaller houses too. Our house is just too big and showy 48 00:02:13,323 --> 00:02:15,763 - You know what I mean? - Yeah, you have to keep it real. 49 00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:18,923 Exactly. That was a Vietnamese restaurant that shut down last week. 50 00:02:18,963 --> 00:02:20,443 Who knows what they'll put there next. 51 00:02:20,483 --> 00:02:22,643 - Could be anything. - Yeah, could be a Betfred. 52 00:02:22,683 --> 00:02:24,763 Where's Rob today? 53 00:02:24,803 --> 00:02:27,563 Oh, don't you know? Aren't you in business with him? 54 00:02:27,603 --> 00:02:28,883 You know mom and dad are mortified about all this. 55 00:02:28,923 --> 00:02:31,083 Morris' don't get divorced. 56 00:02:31,123 --> 00:02:34,443 - We're not getting divorced. - What about next time they go home? 57 00:02:34,483 --> 00:02:38,043 How's Mom gonna tell-- You think of your mom waddling up. 58 00:02:38,083 --> 00:02:40,363 'Cause you know how bad her hip is now. 59 00:02:40,403 --> 00:02:42,843 Waddling up as is everything wasn't bad enough already. 60 00:02:42,883 --> 00:02:44,643 - Waddling up there-- - Shut up, Fergal. 61 00:02:44,683 --> 00:02:46,763 Just to be practical. Your street value has declined. 62 00:02:46,803 --> 00:02:48,683 You're old now and you've kids. 63 00:02:48,723 --> 00:02:51,883 Think there's gonna be something better out there for you? 64 00:02:51,923 --> 00:02:53,763 Forgot to tell you. 65 00:02:53,803 --> 00:02:55,003 Remember that guy you went out with at school, 66 00:02:55,043 --> 00:02:56,363 Connor Byrne, remember him? 67 00:02:56,403 --> 00:02:58,123 Of course. What about him? 68 00:02:58,163 --> 00:03:00,843 He died. I saw it on Facebook this morning. 69 00:03:00,883 --> 00:03:03,683 He died? He's dead? 70 00:03:03,723 --> 00:03:06,123 Yeah, that's your dating pool now. 71 00:03:06,163 --> 00:03:07,843 Dead guys, letting agents. 72 00:03:07,883 --> 00:03:09,763 Maybe. And your husband. 73 00:03:09,803 --> 00:03:13,003 That's it. Bird in the hand, what? 74 00:03:21,523 --> 00:03:23,643 [snorting] 75 00:03:23,683 --> 00:03:25,883 Dave. 76 00:03:25,923 --> 00:03:29,923 Oh, hey, man, don't worry about this. 77 00:03:29,963 --> 00:03:31,363 This is just Friday. 78 00:03:31,403 --> 00:03:33,363 Whatever. Do what you gotta do. 79 00:03:33,403 --> 00:03:36,923 It's your house, but would you mind turning that video game thing down? 80 00:03:36,963 --> 00:03:38,843 It's been on loop for a few hours. 81 00:03:38,883 --> 00:03:40,243 Is that what the noise is? 82 00:03:40,283 --> 00:03:44,003 Sasha said it was inside our heads. 83 00:03:44,043 --> 00:03:46,643 I'm so relieved it's coming from there. 84 00:03:46,683 --> 00:03:47,843 I thought I had a problem. 85 00:03:47,883 --> 00:03:50,163 You know, Dave, I'm getting a sense 86 00:03:50,203 --> 00:03:51,963 this might not be the right place for me. 87 00:03:52,003 --> 00:03:54,923 I mean, I can't bring the kids. Muireann's just a baby. 88 00:03:54,963 --> 00:03:56,683 Her skin's so porous. 89 00:03:56,723 --> 00:03:58,923 I don't want her getting a bunch of coke in her bloodstream. 90 00:03:58,963 --> 00:04:02,083 This isn't coke. This is Krokodil. 91 00:04:02,123 --> 00:04:05,923 Like I'd do coke around a baby. 92 00:04:05,963 --> 00:04:09,683 I love seeing you in my home, buddy. 93 00:04:40,643 --> 00:04:43,563 [cell phone rings] 94 00:04:47,123 --> 00:04:48,283 Hey, Mom. 95 00:04:48,323 --> 00:04:50,963 So I just got off the horn with Sharon. 96 00:04:51,003 --> 00:04:52,963 And if you want my honest opinion, 97 00:04:53,003 --> 00:04:55,043 this is the best thing that could have happened to you. 98 00:04:55,083 --> 00:04:57,163 Really? It doesn't feel like it. 99 00:04:57,203 --> 00:05:00,003 Yeah, I've spoken to Susan Greenberg's husband Mitchell, 100 00:05:00,043 --> 00:05:03,403 and he says he can get you a killer lawyer 101 00:05:03,443 --> 00:05:06,443 who -- not saying send her to jail, 102 00:05:06,483 --> 00:05:09,843 but he can definitely get you full custody of the kids. 103 00:05:09,883 --> 00:05:11,683 I don't want full custody of the kids. 104 00:05:11,723 --> 00:05:13,683 No, you're right. Start over. Clean slate. 105 00:05:13,723 --> 00:05:15,323 - I gotta go to work. - No, you don't. 106 00:05:15,363 --> 00:05:17,963 Sharon told me you're under house arrest 107 00:05:18,003 --> 00:05:20,243 for sexually assaulting some French woman. 108 00:05:20,283 --> 00:05:22,043 I didn't sexually assault anyone. 109 00:05:22,083 --> 00:05:24,723 I know you didn't, and even if you did, 110 00:05:24,763 --> 00:05:27,843 it doesn't define you. It's just the thing you did. 111 00:05:27,883 --> 00:05:30,603 - [beeps] - Ooh, I've gotta go. 112 00:05:30,643 --> 00:05:33,043 Did you know that you can actually 113 00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:35,963 message people from inside eBay? 114 00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,923 I will always answer one of those. 115 00:05:37,963 --> 00:05:39,523 Goodbye, baby. 116 00:05:39,563 --> 00:05:42,403 - Where you taking them? - Don't know. 117 00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:44,723 We might hit a Stay And Play 118 00:05:44,763 --> 00:05:47,683 or we might fly out to Botswana. 119 00:05:47,723 --> 00:05:48,763 Are their passports in the bag? 120 00:05:48,803 --> 00:05:50,523 First, that's not funny. 121 00:05:50,563 --> 00:05:52,163 And second, you would need a notarized letter from me 122 00:05:52,203 --> 00:05:53,843 to leave the country with them because I looked that up, 123 00:05:53,883 --> 00:05:55,443 and that will never happen. 124 00:05:55,483 --> 00:05:58,203 First, it is funny. And second, I looked it up, too. 125 00:05:58,243 --> 00:05:59,363 And you're right. 126 00:06:01,323 --> 00:06:02,363 Hey. 127 00:06:02,403 --> 00:06:03,483 Bye, Mommy. 128 00:06:03,523 --> 00:06:04,643 Bye. [kisses] 129 00:06:06,163 --> 00:06:07,963 Bye-bye-bye. Have fun. 130 00:06:28,963 --> 00:06:32,483 Does he ever use those pads when he goes downtown? 131 00:06:32,523 --> 00:06:34,283 He uses a pillow. 132 00:06:34,323 --> 00:06:36,043 Oh, okay. 133 00:06:36,083 --> 00:06:39,283 More importantly. What's going on with you and Rob? 134 00:06:39,323 --> 00:06:41,603 Oh, I just-- 135 00:06:41,643 --> 00:06:43,883 I just kind of hate him at the moment. 136 00:06:43,923 --> 00:06:45,923 I give up everything for him and he-- 137 00:06:45,963 --> 00:06:47,723 What did you have to give up? 138 00:06:47,763 --> 00:06:51,523 I had-- I gave up my career for him. 139 00:06:51,563 --> 00:06:54,043 My body. I have to wear a padded bra now 140 00:06:54,083 --> 00:06:55,883 just so my giant nipples don't poke through 141 00:06:55,923 --> 00:06:57,123 even when I'm wearing a leather fucking jacket. 142 00:06:57,163 --> 00:06:59,723 Your nipples got big? My nipples got long. 143 00:06:59,763 --> 00:07:01,643 Mine got big and long. 144 00:07:01,683 --> 00:07:04,203 And he repaid me by lying about money, 145 00:07:04,243 --> 00:07:07,003 and having a veritable sex affair with a French slut 146 00:07:07,043 --> 00:07:09,803 who I've looked up online so I got no qualms saying that. 147 00:07:09,843 --> 00:07:13,323 She had purple eye shadow on in her corporate photo. 148 00:07:13,363 --> 00:07:15,083 You're disappointed he's not perfect. 149 00:07:15,123 --> 00:07:18,923 - Well, that's on you, not him. - What? 150 00:07:18,963 --> 00:07:21,763 Take it from someone who's recently wrapped up her own imperfect marriage. 151 00:07:21,803 --> 00:07:23,923 Get him back before it's too late. 152 00:07:23,963 --> 00:07:25,803 A rose for my rose? 153 00:07:25,843 --> 00:07:29,283 Oh, lovely. A rose. 154 00:07:29,323 --> 00:07:32,043 Before it's had the chance to fully blossom, 155 00:07:32,083 --> 00:07:34,923 plucked from my very own garden. 156 00:07:43,803 --> 00:07:45,723 We're the only men here. 157 00:07:45,763 --> 00:07:48,323 I thought dads were supposed to parent now. 158 00:07:48,363 --> 00:07:50,803 Not really. 159 00:07:50,843 --> 00:07:53,443 It's like a meat market with a special on mom jobs. 160 00:07:53,483 --> 00:07:54,883 Nah, this well's poisoned. 161 00:07:54,923 --> 00:07:56,843 They've seen me here with Sharon. 162 00:07:56,883 --> 00:07:58,843 Yeah, well, the odds are good. 163 00:07:58,883 --> 00:08:01,043 The goods are odd. 164 00:08:01,083 --> 00:08:02,483 Do you wanna get out of here? 165 00:08:02,523 --> 00:08:05,723 No way. This is the most fun I've had in weeks. 166 00:08:07,523 --> 00:08:10,283 You have all these plans for your life post marriage. 167 00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:13,403 Then you remember you're pushing 50 168 00:08:13,443 --> 00:08:17,403 and the Sky football package is in fact quite competitively priced. 169 00:08:19,403 --> 00:08:21,803 So what's the plan? You wanna rehash your apology by me? 170 00:08:21,843 --> 00:08:23,803 I haven't done anything wrong. 171 00:08:23,843 --> 00:08:25,763 - Okay, OJ. - What? I didn't-- 172 00:08:25,803 --> 00:08:29,483 Come on, you put a down payment on an affair, 173 00:08:29,523 --> 00:08:32,883 you dish-faced American twat. 174 00:08:32,923 --> 00:08:34,603 You let Emanuelle know 175 00:08:34,643 --> 00:08:37,243 there's cracks in the dam at home. 176 00:08:37,283 --> 00:08:39,283 That stinks. 177 00:08:39,323 --> 00:08:42,123 [inhales and exhales] 178 00:08:42,163 --> 00:08:44,563 It stinks like French pussy. 179 00:08:46,043 --> 00:08:49,843 Oh, and Frankie got a little cut on his finger. 180 00:08:49,883 --> 00:08:51,323 How'd he cut his finger? 181 00:08:51,363 --> 00:08:53,723 He said a man with a sword did it. 182 00:08:53,763 --> 00:08:56,163 I didn't see any men with swords. 183 00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:59,843 - Right, well, I'm gonna go. - Well, wait, um-- 184 00:08:59,883 --> 00:09:01,403 I just wanted to say, um-- 185 00:09:01,443 --> 00:09:03,843 I just wanted to-- sorry for some of the things. 186 00:09:03,883 --> 00:09:07,603 I think there's maybe certain things I could have handled a bit better, I suppose. 187 00:09:07,643 --> 00:09:09,883 Okay, thank you. 188 00:09:09,923 --> 00:09:13,643 [chuckles] Thank you? 189 00:09:13,683 --> 00:09:16,483 I just said "sorry" and you said, "Thank you." 190 00:09:16,523 --> 00:09:20,523 You didn't say "sorry." You said, "Sorry for some of the things." 191 00:09:20,563 --> 00:09:23,763 - That's not an apology. - It wasn't supposed to be an apology. 192 00:09:23,803 --> 00:09:26,283 I don't even want to apologize. 193 00:09:26,323 --> 00:09:28,003 I've got nothing to apologize for. 194 00:09:30,363 --> 00:09:32,443 I've got nothing to apologize for, 195 00:09:32,483 --> 00:09:34,643 because I didn't do anything wrong. 196 00:09:37,523 --> 00:09:40,723 What I did was like a fidelity traffic violation. 197 00:09:40,763 --> 00:09:43,403 You told that woman, or as good as told her, that you think about 198 00:09:43,443 --> 00:09:46,523 [whispers] fucking her often. And you got yourself fired. 199 00:09:46,563 --> 00:09:49,763 I haven't been fired. I'm just not allowed to go to work right now. 200 00:09:49,803 --> 00:09:53,323 Plus, I'd say there's a pretty big difference between that and what I actually said. 201 00:09:53,363 --> 00:09:55,803 If you didn't say it, then it's what you exuded. 202 00:09:55,843 --> 00:09:57,443 You don't know what I exude. 203 00:09:57,483 --> 00:10:00,923 You exude black squid ink. 204 00:10:00,963 --> 00:10:03,163 What are you talking about? That doesn't even make any sense? 205 00:10:03,203 --> 00:10:04,483 It makes sense. 206 00:10:06,363 --> 00:10:08,163 Just what did you gain 207 00:10:08,203 --> 00:10:10,883 for not telling that French cow exactly where to get off? 208 00:10:10,923 --> 00:10:13,723 When she said all that shit to you, did you want her to like you? 209 00:10:13,763 --> 00:10:17,203 Not everyone has to like you. You're not a puppy. 210 00:10:17,243 --> 00:10:19,803 You're an adult man with a wife, 211 00:10:19,843 --> 00:10:22,043 honest people who tell people how they feel, 212 00:10:22,083 --> 00:10:24,483 when they feel it, have people not like them. 213 00:10:24,523 --> 00:10:27,963 Okay, that's what I do. I've earned the right to have people dislike me. 214 00:10:28,003 --> 00:10:30,603 I am very happy to have people not like me. 215 00:10:30,643 --> 00:10:33,683 No shit. Let me call the Associated Press. 216 00:10:33,723 --> 00:10:36,083 You know what I think? I think the truth is your marriage wasn't 217 00:10:36,123 --> 00:10:39,123 a fucking fun fair 100% of the time, you child. 218 00:10:39,163 --> 00:10:43,523 So you had to have yourself a little escape hatch pussy at the ready. 219 00:10:43,563 --> 00:10:47,323 Well, wipe Frankie's ass better next time. 220 00:10:47,363 --> 00:10:48,923 Because when I picked him up, 221 00:10:48,963 --> 00:10:51,083 it was not clean and it made the car smell. 222 00:11:05,083 --> 00:11:09,563 Hello, it's Sharon. What are you doing tonight? 223 00:11:09,603 --> 00:11:12,603 [door opens] 224 00:11:12,643 --> 00:11:14,643 Rob: Dave, something's burning. 225 00:11:14,683 --> 00:11:16,403 - [inhales] - Are you cooking? 226 00:11:16,443 --> 00:11:17,763 Hey. 227 00:11:19,683 --> 00:11:21,043 Where are you going? 228 00:11:21,083 --> 00:11:22,243 I'm gonna get a hotel. 229 00:11:22,283 --> 00:11:24,643 Oh, no, no, no, you got this all wrong. 230 00:11:24,683 --> 00:11:26,283 I'm cleaning up my act. 231 00:11:26,323 --> 00:11:27,843 See, I had Ken come over specifically 232 00:11:27,883 --> 00:11:29,483 to finish off the drugs with me. 233 00:11:33,643 --> 00:11:36,003 [inhales and exhales] 234 00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:37,963 And later, I have a cleaning lady coming over 235 00:11:38,003 --> 00:11:40,283 so now my home is a safe place 236 00:11:40,323 --> 00:11:43,803 for kids and their drugs-- dads. 237 00:11:43,843 --> 00:11:47,603 Thanks for letting me stay, Dave. I'll call you. 238 00:11:47,643 --> 00:11:51,603 I'm gonna bake a key lime pie later. 239 00:11:51,643 --> 00:11:54,563 So why don't you come back then? For pie. 240 00:11:54,603 --> 00:11:56,043 Where's the toilet? 241 00:11:56,083 --> 00:11:59,203 Huh? Oh, it's just there. 242 00:12:01,603 --> 00:12:05,243 Do you have another one further away? [groans] 243 00:12:07,043 --> 00:12:08,883 Watch whatever you want, eat whatever you want. 244 00:12:08,923 --> 00:12:10,643 There's some coconut bullshit in the fridge. 245 00:12:10,683 --> 00:12:13,963 I don't know what it is. Please eat it. 246 00:12:14,003 --> 00:12:18,283 I noticed you had some little Heinekens from the fridge last time you were here. 247 00:12:18,323 --> 00:12:20,403 I don't want you to drink. Is that okay? 248 00:12:20,443 --> 00:12:22,203 Even a little can of-- when you're with my kids. 249 00:12:22,243 --> 00:12:24,163 Well, there was nothing else to drink. 250 00:12:24,203 --> 00:12:29,123 Even-- even still. Just have some tap water from the tap. 251 00:12:31,483 --> 00:12:35,443 - Where's Rob? - I don't know where he is. 252 00:12:35,483 --> 00:12:37,843 - What, did he leave you? - No, I kicked him out. 253 00:12:37,883 --> 00:12:39,843 Shit. 254 00:12:39,883 --> 00:12:41,923 - You kicked him out? - Yeah. 255 00:12:41,963 --> 00:12:43,723 That's nuts. You all right? 256 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:46,083 Yeah, I'm very all right. 257 00:12:46,123 --> 00:12:49,043 - Wait, you kicked him out? - Yep. 258 00:12:49,083 --> 00:12:50,963 'Cause that's nuts, that is. 259 00:12:51,003 --> 00:12:54,723 Yep, so you said. All right, I'm going. 260 00:12:54,763 --> 00:12:55,683 See you later. 261 00:13:01,643 --> 00:13:03,963 Why do you think it's nuts? What's so nuts? 262 00:13:04,003 --> 00:13:06,803 I don't know. He's just fit, isn't he? 263 00:13:06,843 --> 00:13:09,643 Yeah. Do you not think I'm fit? 264 00:13:09,683 --> 00:13:12,643 - What? - Nothing, doesn't matter. I've counted the beers. 265 00:13:27,243 --> 00:13:30,083 [sighing] 266 00:13:36,803 --> 00:13:40,003 Oh, for goodness sake. 267 00:13:59,323 --> 00:14:01,923 And Brian said if I'd been less brazen about it, 268 00:14:01,963 --> 00:14:04,163 he might not have kicked me out. 269 00:14:04,203 --> 00:14:05,563 Oh, right, yeah. 270 00:14:05,603 --> 00:14:07,563 But I had receipts for lube 271 00:14:07,603 --> 00:14:11,563 - from, like, five different chemists in my bag. - Right. 272 00:14:11,603 --> 00:14:14,043 You know how you need a lot more lube when you get older? 273 00:14:14,083 --> 00:14:16,483 Oh, God. 274 00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:18,963 - But I get to see the kids every other weekend, though. - Aww. 275 00:14:19,003 --> 00:14:23,763 Ellie my four-year-old called me a slag the last time I saw her. 276 00:14:23,803 --> 00:14:24,883 Christ. 277 00:14:24,923 --> 00:14:27,123 I'm not happy. [sobs] 278 00:14:27,163 --> 00:14:29,643 You know, so think about it for a minute 279 00:14:29,683 --> 00:14:34,563 before you move into a dirty houseboat with a tanning bed salesman. 280 00:14:34,603 --> 00:14:36,803 Even if he does have a massive cock. 281 00:14:36,843 --> 00:14:37,843 Look-- 282 00:14:37,883 --> 00:14:39,323 No, I mean, it's massive. 283 00:14:40,923 --> 00:14:42,643 How's it going, lads? 284 00:14:42,683 --> 00:14:44,843 I was just saying, do you know who you look like? 285 00:14:44,883 --> 00:14:46,763 Your PE teacher? 286 00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:51,603 [laughing] People say I look like a filthy Natalie Portman. 287 00:14:53,723 --> 00:14:55,643 Do you want a drink? 288 00:14:55,683 --> 00:14:56,843 Say yes. 289 00:14:56,883 --> 00:14:58,923 - Yeah. - Okay. 290 00:15:10,523 --> 00:15:13,763 - [thumping] - [woman moaning] 291 00:15:15,203 --> 00:15:18,363 - [glass shatters] - [man laughs] 292 00:15:38,083 --> 00:15:41,363 Can I have an escort? 293 00:15:41,403 --> 00:15:44,363 Okay, I'm sorry. 294 00:15:44,403 --> 00:15:46,843 Can you give me the phone number 295 00:15:46,883 --> 00:15:49,443 for not an expensive one? 296 00:15:49,483 --> 00:15:52,523 Okay, sorry. 297 00:15:52,563 --> 00:15:55,363 You're right, and plus, 298 00:15:55,403 --> 00:15:59,203 I was only kidding, and you need to lighten up. 299 00:15:59,243 --> 00:16:02,483 I'm just partying if you wanna come up. 300 00:16:02,523 --> 00:16:04,763 What's your name? 301 00:16:04,803 --> 00:16:07,683 Okay, thanks, Kevin, maybe next time. 302 00:16:21,683 --> 00:16:24,723 [laughs] No. 303 00:16:26,443 --> 00:16:28,123 [exhales] 304 00:16:28,163 --> 00:16:30,803 Fuck. 305 00:16:32,163 --> 00:16:33,563 Hmm. 306 00:16:33,603 --> 00:16:35,843 Do you think they're talking to them about us? 307 00:16:35,883 --> 00:16:39,563 [laughs] I doubt it. 308 00:16:41,243 --> 00:16:43,723 We bought them those drinks 309 00:16:43,763 --> 00:16:46,963 on the understanding that they would then buy us drinks. 310 00:16:47,003 --> 00:16:48,643 - Right? - Yeah. 311 00:16:48,683 --> 00:16:51,123 Hang on. Did they just buy them drinks? 312 00:16:51,163 --> 00:16:53,803 You do not pay it forward. 313 00:16:53,843 --> 00:16:56,083 I'm going over there. 314 00:16:56,123 --> 00:16:59,323 What? No, wait. Don't go over. 315 00:17:07,243 --> 00:17:08,603 Be patient. 316 00:17:11,523 --> 00:17:13,123 Hey, Dave. 317 00:17:16,603 --> 00:17:19,403 Hey, Dave. 318 00:17:19,443 --> 00:17:21,683 Dave. 319 00:17:21,723 --> 00:17:23,803 Dave. 320 00:17:32,123 --> 00:17:33,563 Lamp. 321 00:17:36,003 --> 00:17:38,443 Dave, are you here? 322 00:17:40,563 --> 00:17:43,883 Jesus, Dave. 323 00:17:45,083 --> 00:17:48,643 Dave, wake up, man. 324 00:17:50,683 --> 00:17:53,523 Wake the fuck up! 325 00:17:54,683 --> 00:17:56,603 [grunting] 326 00:18:02,203 --> 00:18:04,243 Are you breathing? 327 00:18:04,283 --> 00:18:08,843 Are you breathing, you fucking 45-year-old heroin partier? 328 00:18:13,123 --> 00:18:15,963 [wretches] 329 00:18:28,323 --> 00:18:30,963 Hello, I have an OD. 330 00:18:31,003 --> 00:18:34,403 My friend OD'ed on Clark Street. 331 00:18:36,203 --> 00:18:38,603 Hey, want a drink? 332 00:18:38,643 --> 00:18:40,243 No, I've had enough. 333 00:18:40,283 --> 00:18:42,723 Well, yeah, I'll have a Diet Coke. What are you having? 334 00:18:42,763 --> 00:18:45,443 - Whiskey. - Yeah, okay, I'll have one of those. 335 00:18:45,483 --> 00:18:48,483 - Thought we lost you to Elsa and Anna over there. - Who? 336 00:18:48,523 --> 00:18:50,243 Have you not seen "Frozen"? 337 00:18:50,283 --> 00:18:51,963 I don't suppose you wouldn't-- Oh, it doesn't matter. 338 00:18:54,363 --> 00:18:57,763 So what's the deal with all this? 339 00:18:57,803 --> 00:19:01,363 Do you play rugby, or wrestle or whatever? 340 00:19:01,403 --> 00:19:03,123 No, it's crossfit, baby. 341 00:19:03,163 --> 00:19:05,003 Gross. 342 00:19:05,043 --> 00:19:07,563 Hey, you ever been up on the roof of this place? 343 00:19:07,603 --> 00:19:10,643 It's pretty cool. You can see for, like, 1,000 miles. 344 00:19:10,683 --> 00:19:13,923 Really? Like the full thousand? 345 00:19:13,963 --> 00:19:15,723 To, like, all the way to Namibia. 346 00:19:15,763 --> 00:19:17,683 What? 347 00:19:17,723 --> 00:19:20,483 Namibi-- doesn't matter. Come on, let's go. 348 00:19:20,523 --> 00:19:22,203 I love a good roof. 349 00:19:22,243 --> 00:19:25,763 - Hey. - I'm just going up on the roof. 350 00:19:25,803 --> 00:19:26,723 Where'd the other one go? 351 00:19:28,843 --> 00:19:32,563 He's in a stable for now. I mean, he's in a coma. 352 00:19:32,603 --> 00:19:36,843 But the good news is that anything that is gonna happen 353 00:19:36,883 --> 00:19:39,603 has already happened other than death. 354 00:19:39,643 --> 00:19:43,283 So now we just wait, see what damage there's-- 355 00:19:43,323 --> 00:19:45,523 You know, that's totally, um-- 356 00:19:45,563 --> 00:19:46,683 You know, to be figured out. 357 00:19:46,723 --> 00:19:49,323 That's um, TBD. 358 00:19:49,363 --> 00:19:51,363 Jesus. 359 00:19:51,403 --> 00:19:52,923 I feel terrible. 360 00:19:52,963 --> 00:19:57,043 Why because you got mad when he lied to you? 361 00:19:57,083 --> 00:19:59,483 Men shouldn't lie to women. 362 00:19:59,523 --> 00:20:01,523 Don't feel you need to talk to me. 363 00:20:01,563 --> 00:20:04,043 Okay, I'll just be here by the vending machine 364 00:20:04,083 --> 00:20:07,083 and only if you get the chance 'cause this is a huge favor, 365 00:20:07,123 --> 00:20:11,283 but I put £2 in the machine for some chicken soup, 366 00:20:11,323 --> 00:20:14,323 it's E6 and no chicken soup came out. 367 00:20:14,363 --> 00:20:17,403 So if there's a machine in the doctor's lounge. 368 00:20:17,443 --> 00:20:21,523 [groans] 369 00:20:21,563 --> 00:20:25,883 Just so... friggin' hungry. 370 00:20:31,963 --> 00:20:34,603 [sobs] 371 00:20:37,443 --> 00:20:39,683 [groans] 372 00:20:41,603 --> 00:20:43,923 [cell phone rings] 373 00:20:51,963 --> 00:20:54,003 Oh. 374 00:20:54,043 --> 00:20:57,203 - Hey. - Hey. 375 00:20:57,243 --> 00:21:00,923 Are you okay? [exhales] 376 00:21:00,963 --> 00:21:03,843 Jesus. I don't want him to die. 377 00:21:03,883 --> 00:21:05,163 I mean, 'cause I quite like him, 378 00:21:05,203 --> 00:21:07,843 but also he just made me feel better about me. 379 00:21:07,883 --> 00:21:09,763 Thanks for telling me. 380 00:21:09,803 --> 00:21:12,083 Who else am I gonna tell? 381 00:21:14,523 --> 00:21:18,043 Sorry, I know I smell like a festival toilet. I drunk a lot last night. 382 00:21:18,083 --> 00:21:20,603 - No. - Brushed my teeth five times. I had a shower. 383 00:21:20,643 --> 00:21:22,243 I don't even know where the smell is coming from. 384 00:21:22,283 --> 00:21:24,803 It's like [sniffs] my liver? I don't know. 385 00:21:24,843 --> 00:21:25,843 Where's Frankie? 386 00:21:25,883 --> 00:21:28,323 What? Do you not have him? 387 00:21:29,643 --> 00:21:33,163 [laughs] He's at Ollie's. 388 00:21:39,483 --> 00:21:41,523 How are you? 389 00:21:41,563 --> 00:21:43,923 Very shit. How are you? 390 00:21:43,963 --> 00:21:47,803 - Very not well. - Look, I've really thought about everything. 391 00:21:47,843 --> 00:21:50,083 So have I. So have I. 392 00:21:50,123 --> 00:21:52,923 I think this is how I'm gonna get my head around it. 393 00:21:52,963 --> 00:21:55,363 You hated your job, right? I mean, you really hated it. 394 00:21:55,403 --> 00:21:58,283 And this French hussy waltzed in and made things exciting for a while, 395 00:21:58,323 --> 00:22:01,003 and you let her because you're weak. 396 00:22:01,043 --> 00:22:03,363 - And stupid. - Yeah, and sometimes 397 00:22:03,403 --> 00:22:05,603 when I feel worthless and ugly, 398 00:22:05,643 --> 00:22:09,163 I go to the coffee place by the canal because the Spanish guy who works there 399 00:22:09,203 --> 00:22:10,843 definitely wants to fuck me. 400 00:22:10,883 --> 00:22:14,563 I mean, he definitely wants to and I let him want that 401 00:22:14,603 --> 00:22:18,323 with my body language and sometimes my words language. 402 00:22:18,363 --> 00:22:21,523 What I did is worse because I jeopardized everything. 403 00:22:21,563 --> 00:22:23,403 - No, you just-- - What did you want? 404 00:22:23,443 --> 00:22:26,283 Some free cinnamon on your cappuccino. 405 00:22:26,323 --> 00:22:28,323 I put my job and my family at risk. 406 00:22:28,363 --> 00:22:29,523 Well, maybe don't. 407 00:22:29,563 --> 00:22:31,243 Because I'm already finding it hard 408 00:22:31,283 --> 00:22:35,043 - Okay. - to just get my head around the-- 409 00:22:35,083 --> 00:22:37,763 I don't wanna be alone. 410 00:22:37,803 --> 00:22:39,603 I don't, either. 411 00:22:39,643 --> 00:22:42,483 I don't feel safe in the house you know, on my own. 412 00:22:42,523 --> 00:22:46,123 There's a new nighttime noise, and it's not a fox or-- 413 00:22:46,163 --> 00:22:49,443 I don't know what it is, but it's a bad new nighttime noise. 414 00:22:49,483 --> 00:22:52,683 Okay, I would like to help you identify that noise. 415 00:22:52,723 --> 00:22:55,923 And I know you wanted to move the bed against the other wall, 416 00:22:55,963 --> 00:22:57,683 and you can't do that on your own. 417 00:22:57,723 --> 00:22:59,843 Are they good enough reasons to stay together? 418 00:22:59,883 --> 00:23:01,923 Maybe not, but here's another one. 419 00:23:01,963 --> 00:23:04,243 I've been looking at flats and they're so expensive. 420 00:23:04,283 --> 00:23:06,923 I'd have to move 30 miles away from you and the kids. 421 00:23:06,963 --> 00:23:08,563 And I don't wanna do that. 422 00:23:08,603 --> 00:23:11,283 And this is a tiny one, 423 00:23:11,323 --> 00:23:14,043 but as I look at you, 424 00:23:14,083 --> 00:23:17,763 all the reasons I fell in love with you have come flooding back so much 425 00:23:17,803 --> 00:23:19,443 that I think I might throw up. 426 00:23:21,403 --> 00:23:24,723 And again, flats are very expensive. 427 00:23:26,963 --> 00:23:29,123 They do sound really expensive. 428 00:23:31,243 --> 00:23:34,563 - Have you slept with anyone? - No. 429 00:23:34,603 --> 00:23:38,043 I did jerk off a couple times at Dave's 430 00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:40,723 'cause his porn collection is like museum level, 431 00:23:40,763 --> 00:23:42,563 but that's it. 432 00:23:42,603 --> 00:23:44,243 Have you? 433 00:23:44,283 --> 00:23:46,363 - What? - Slept with anyone? 434 00:23:46,403 --> 00:23:49,123 - Of course I haven't fucking slept with anyone. - Really? 435 00:23:49,163 --> 00:23:51,083 No. 436 00:23:51,123 --> 00:23:54,603 No, I can't show this fanny to anyone, it's a mess. 437 00:23:54,643 --> 00:23:57,483 There's scar tissue. I don't even wanna look at it. 438 00:23:59,203 --> 00:24:01,803 The only person I can show this fanny to is you. 439 00:24:01,843 --> 00:24:05,203 Can you show it to me right now? 440 00:24:06,683 --> 00:24:09,363 [grunting] 441 00:24:11,323 --> 00:24:12,963 Oh, shit, there's a guy. 442 00:24:13,003 --> 00:24:15,203 He can't see us. 443 00:24:15,243 --> 00:24:16,843 I love you. 444 00:24:16,883 --> 00:24:18,203 I love you. 445 00:24:20,243 --> 00:24:21,963 [grunting] 446 00:24:37,483 --> 00:24:40,123 [phone line ringing] 447 00:24:40,163 --> 00:24:43,003 - Hey. - Hi, Kate, it's Sharon. 448 00:24:43,043 --> 00:24:45,123 How's it going? 449 00:24:45,163 --> 00:24:47,163 - Are you still with-- - Am I still with who? 450 00:24:47,203 --> 00:24:49,123 What's his name? From last night. 451 00:24:49,163 --> 00:24:53,083 No, I am not. I'm at home 452 00:24:53,123 --> 00:24:56,323 with my husband and my kids and I just made lasagna 453 00:24:56,363 --> 00:24:59,123 - and now I'm putting toys away. - Good for you. 454 00:24:59,163 --> 00:25:01,923 Can you just tell me approximately what happened last night? 455 00:25:01,963 --> 00:25:03,403 There's a huge chunk of it I can't remember. 456 00:25:03,443 --> 00:25:06,203 Are you alone? You went off with your man. 457 00:25:06,243 --> 00:25:08,163 For what, like a minute? 458 00:25:08,203 --> 00:25:10,723 More like an hour. [laughs] 459 00:25:10,763 --> 00:25:14,923 And then you left, like, with him. [laughs] 460 00:25:14,963 --> 00:25:18,443 [sighs] Shit. 461 00:25:18,483 --> 00:25:20,403 [mutters] 462 00:25:22,043 --> 00:25:24,523 Oh. 463 00:25:24,563 --> 00:25:28,003 Oh, God. Oh, shit. 464 00:25:28,043 --> 00:25:30,363 - [sniffs] - Rob: Hey. 465 00:25:30,403 --> 00:25:33,123 Frankie wants to show you the poop that he just did. 466 00:25:33,163 --> 00:25:35,683 Before you say no, it's pretty amazing. 467 00:25:35,723 --> 00:25:39,683 [panting] Sure. Oh, God. 468 00:25:43,763 --> 00:25:45,083 - Hi. - Can I help you? 469 00:25:45,123 --> 00:25:49,483 Yeah. I need Plan B. Like, a morning after pill. 470 00:25:49,523 --> 00:25:52,323 Whatever. I mean, I probably don't, but I'm just gonna-- 471 00:25:52,363 --> 00:25:56,483 I need the morning after pill. [exhales] 472 00:25:59,603 --> 00:26:01,603 Shit. 473 00:26:06,203 --> 00:26:08,203 You think Frankie understands the plot? 474 00:26:08,243 --> 00:26:10,603 It's just two cowboys falling in love. 475 00:26:10,643 --> 00:26:12,883 I think he probably gets it. 476 00:26:12,923 --> 00:26:15,403 [doorbell rings] 477 00:26:15,443 --> 00:26:16,443 I'm minding Muireann. 478 00:26:17,963 --> 00:26:19,403 Okay. 479 00:26:20,603 --> 00:26:22,363 [kisses] 480 00:26:26,003 --> 00:26:28,763 - Here you go. Keep the change. - Thank you. 481 00:26:28,803 --> 00:26:31,843 Oh, this was in there. 482 00:26:31,883 --> 00:26:33,203 Cheers. 483 00:26:40,843 --> 00:26:43,003 What the fuck? 484 00:27:11,963 --> 00:27:13,683 You okay? 485 00:27:15,363 --> 00:27:16,643 A bit spicy.