1
00:00:08,975 --> 00:00:12,545
You were having a dart with
your pals the other day...

2
00:00:15,815 --> 00:00:17,083
DAN: Tanis is off
the darts, eh?

3
00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:18,818
- WAYNE: Is she really?
- DARY: How'd she manage that?

4
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:21,254
Said she was reading an
articles in Canadian Livings,

5
00:00:21,287 --> 00:00:22,622
or... or maybe it was
Chatelaines.

6
00:00:22,655 --> 00:00:24,557
Could have just as
easily been Chatelaine.

7
00:00:24,591 --> 00:00:26,393
- Or Flare.
- Oh, maybe it was Flares.

8
00:00:26,426 --> 00:00:27,827
Could have just as
easily been.

9
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,562
Either way, she
was reads-ing an article

10
00:00:29,596 --> 00:00:31,831
that posed the questions,
"Whens was the last times

11
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:35,502
youse reallys
enjoyeds a darts?"

12
00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:37,404
Well, I gotta say that I'm
enjoying this dart quite a bit

13
00:00:37,437 --> 00:00:38,938
- right here.
- This is a great dart.

14
00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:40,707
Yeah. I was just thinking there
ain't nothing wrong

15
00:00:40,740 --> 00:00:42,942
with the darts
I'm havings right nows.

16
00:00:44,844 --> 00:00:46,579
Like, I know you're
not supposed to like them.

17
00:00:46,613 --> 00:00:48,348
- Who's "you"?
- And they tell you

18
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:50,150
- that they're bad for you.
- Who's "they"?

19
00:00:50,183 --> 00:00:51,718
But it's just like...

20
00:00:51,751 --> 00:00:53,319
quit telling me what
I shouldn't like.

21
00:00:53,353 --> 00:00:54,788
I think youse just
became theys.

22
00:00:54,821 --> 00:00:56,423
So don't go telling
me what I shouldn't like.

23
00:00:56,456 --> 00:00:57,857
Who you fucking talking
to, bud?

24
00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,526
I was just thinkings,
I can'ts--

25
00:00:59,559 --> 00:01:01,594
I can'ts remembers a
darts I didn'ts enjoys.

26
00:01:01,628 --> 00:01:03,463
Well, it's like, if you're
not going to enjoy the dart,

27
00:01:03,496 --> 00:01:04,898
then just don't
have the dart.

28
00:01:04,931 --> 00:01:07,367
Well, yeah. That's the power
that you have over the darts.

29
00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:08,968
They try to tell you that that's
the power

30
00:01:09,002 --> 00:01:10,203
the darts have over you.

31
00:01:10,236 --> 00:01:11,671
Fuck. They's got
a big mouth.

32
00:01:11,704 --> 00:01:13,306
They's starting to
piss me off!

33
00:01:13,339 --> 00:01:14,874
Well, just because
I think that, you know,

34
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,676
it's you running to
the store all the time

35
00:01:16,709 --> 00:01:18,878
and spending your hard-earned
money on the darts,

36
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:20,680
rather than
the other way around.

37
00:01:20,713 --> 00:01:22,549
(Chuckling) Kind of
funny, though,

38
00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:25,485
the thought of darts going
to the store for you.

39
00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:31,124
They don't
think so, eh?

40
00:01:31,157 --> 00:01:34,094
DAN: What would you says is
the darts yous most enjoyeds?

41
00:01:34,127 --> 00:01:37,764
Oh.
(Chuckling)

42
00:01:38,998 --> 00:01:41,801
We've had a lot of great
darts over the years.

43
00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:43,503
I've always enjoyed
that first dart

44
00:01:43,536 --> 00:01:46,005
- when you step off an airplane.
- That's a great dart.

45
00:01:46,039 --> 00:01:47,707
No better pair than
a coffee and a dart.

46
00:01:47,740 --> 00:01:49,309
WAYNE: Fucking not even
a piss and a fart.

47
00:01:49,342 --> 00:01:51,611
DARY: But if I have to say the
dart that I enjoyed the most--

48
00:01:51,644 --> 00:01:53,746
- DAN: Evers?
- Yeah.

49
00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:55,715
If I have to say the dart
that I enjoyed the most ever,

50
00:01:55,748 --> 00:01:58,284
it would be the first
dart I ever had.

51
00:01:58,318 --> 00:01:59,452
Geez, I don't
remember that dart

52
00:01:59,486 --> 00:02:00,653
being such a good
darts for mes.

53
00:02:00,687 --> 00:02:02,755
Oh, I coughed
so God damn bad.

54
00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,624
Well, it was the first
time I'd ever had sex.

55
00:02:04,657 --> 00:02:06,192
DAN, WAYNE:
Oh.

56
00:02:06,226 --> 00:02:08,461
- If you lay it out like that.
- Changed my fucking mind.

57
00:02:08,495 --> 00:02:10,263
- That'd be a damned good dart.
- Context. Yeah.

58
00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:12,932
Wee bit cliché, though, lighting
up a darts after sex, though,

59
00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:15,034
- don't you thinks?
- Well, I had heard

60
00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:16,936
that you're supposed to
lay with them for a little while

61
00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:19,839
before you go get cleaned up,
so I figured I'd have a dart.

62
00:02:19,873 --> 00:02:22,142
Better not be darting in bed if
I'm doing up the linens.

63
00:02:22,175 --> 00:02:24,344
It's just that I'd
seen people in movies smoke

64
00:02:24,377 --> 00:02:26,312
so many times after sex
that I thought

65
00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:27,780
that's what you
were 'exposed' to do.

66
00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:28,715
DAN: Oh, no.

67
00:02:28,748 --> 00:02:30,016
Same thing goes with the sex
beforehand.

68
00:02:30,049 --> 00:02:31,918
I just did what I'd seen so many
times in porno movies,

69
00:02:31,951 --> 00:02:34,320
and it turns out that is not
what you're exposed to do.

70
00:02:34,354 --> 00:02:35,955
- WAYNE: No.
- I thinks the best darts

71
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,291
I ever had was the series of
darts I'd smokes after school,

72
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:39,692
playing cards with
my Aunt Ethels.

73
00:02:39,726 --> 00:02:41,928
But mind you, Ethels
would call darts fags,

74
00:02:41,961 --> 00:02:44,063
and I expose there's
a certain amount of charm

75
00:02:44,097 --> 00:02:46,065
to that language coming
outs of the right mouths.

76
00:02:46,099 --> 00:02:48,034
Oh, context. Yeah.

77
00:02:49,135 --> 00:02:50,537
What about you, Wayne?

78
00:02:50,570 --> 00:02:52,372
(Wayne grunting)

79
00:02:52,405 --> 00:02:53,806
You okays,
good buddies?

80
00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:56,709
(Grunting)
Just like...

81
00:02:56,743 --> 00:02:58,545
getting a wee bit
emotional here

82
00:02:58,578 --> 00:03:00,280
with all this talk
of great darts.

83
00:03:00,313 --> 00:03:02,015
DAN:
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

84
00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:03,950
Been a lot of great fucking
darts over the years.

85
00:03:03,983 --> 00:03:06,786
WAYNE: ...think about
them a lot, so...

86
00:03:06,819 --> 00:03:08,688
Only can really think
about them so much, though.

87
00:03:08,721 --> 00:03:10,156
You think about who's
been there for you.

88
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,759
Yeah. Right there in
the breast pocket there.

89
00:03:15,295 --> 00:03:16,696
Fucking great darts.

90
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:20,600
Do you want to know what? You
kinda enjoy them all equally,

91
00:03:20,633 --> 00:03:22,035
and if you didn't,
you wouldn't smoke them.

92
00:03:22,068 --> 00:03:24,470
So hold your judgement,
because at the end of the day,

93
00:03:24,504 --> 00:03:26,039
I could put down
darts a lot faster

94
00:03:26,072 --> 00:03:28,808
than you could put down
the fucking internet.

95
00:03:28,841 --> 00:03:29,008
♪

96
00:03:39,452 --> 00:03:40,820
How's Jivin' doing?

97
00:03:42,655 --> 00:03:44,123
WAYNE:
You're late, bud!

98
00:03:47,427 --> 00:03:48,761
You're late, bud.

99
00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:50,830
You're late, bud!

100
00:03:52,365 --> 00:03:53,533
You're late, bud.

101
00:03:53,566 --> 00:03:54,934
Bale of hay
could kill a man!

102
00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:57,070
WAYNE:
It's fucking barley!

103
00:03:57,103 --> 00:03:58,037
He'll figure it out.

104
00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,539
Don't cuts him too much slacks,
good buddies.

105
00:03:59,572 --> 00:04:00,873
Bend enough and
you'll break.

106
00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:02,475
I'd have never hired
him in the first place.

107
00:04:02,508 --> 00:04:05,011
When a friend asks for
help, you help him.

108
00:04:05,044 --> 00:04:07,380
- No friend of mine.
- Oh, look at that.

109
00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:09,282
Guy who got exiled
for two years

110
00:04:09,315 --> 00:04:12,051
after getting written up in
the paper for mailbox stealing

111
00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,720
doesn't believe
in second chances.

112
00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:16,122
Hey, Katy? Katy?

113
00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:20,093
What are those?

114
00:04:22,528 --> 00:04:23,663
What, these?

115
00:04:23,696 --> 00:04:25,732
See you got some new
high-tops there.

116
00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:28,468
These don't need an
introduction.

117
00:04:28,501 --> 00:04:29,802
What are you trying
to fucking...

118
00:04:29,836 --> 00:04:31,571
you trying to fucking
start a punk band or--

119
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:32,839
- Skas band?
- Skinhead?

120
00:04:32,872 --> 00:04:35,541
Sticks and stones, boys.
Docs are timeless fashion,

121
00:04:35,575 --> 00:04:37,543
and timeless fashion
never goes out of style.

122
00:04:37,577 --> 00:04:39,545
Okay. So, what
are you, a fucking...

123
00:04:39,579 --> 00:04:40,980
fucking dairy-free
ice cream eater or--

124
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:42,815
- Going to smoke a pipe next?
- Oi! Oi! Oi!

125
00:04:42,849 --> 00:04:46,052
Style tips from Mark's Work
fucking Warehouse. I love it.

126
00:04:46,085 --> 00:04:50,356
DAN: Alright, but does you
really wants to be... that guy?

127
00:04:50,390 --> 00:04:52,892
Youse guys don't know what
the fuck you're talking about.

128
00:04:52,925 --> 00:04:54,594
What's wrong with being
known for something?

129
00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:56,496
Oh, nothings,
nothings...

130
00:04:56,529 --> 00:04:57,997
if'n it's a good thing.

131
00:04:58,031 --> 00:04:59,532
Yeah, there was a while there
that I was thinking

132
00:04:59,565 --> 00:05:02,201
about rocking a chain wallet,
but didn't want to be that guy.

133
00:05:02,235 --> 00:05:04,137
Same with me when
I had my nipples ring.

134
00:05:04,170 --> 00:05:06,406
- I was that guy.
- How'd you get that out?

135
00:05:06,439 --> 00:05:08,041
- You was there.
- Was I really?

136
00:05:08,074 --> 00:05:09,976
I mean, it's like the time I
wanted to get cat-eye glasses,

137
00:05:10,009 --> 00:05:11,477
but I didn't want
to be that guy.

138
00:05:11,511 --> 00:05:13,446
Same with bangs.

139
00:05:15,381 --> 00:05:16,582
Oh, my God.

140
00:05:16,616 --> 00:05:17,984
Should I get bangs?

141
00:05:18,017 --> 00:05:20,787
GUYS: (In monotone)
Yes. You should get bangs.

142
00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:22,255
It's not
the right time.

143
00:05:22,288 --> 00:05:25,825
- Should I get bangs?
- Dudes don't get bangs.

144
00:05:25,858 --> 00:05:27,794
- Wayne has bangs.
- Docs are different, though.

145
00:05:27,827 --> 00:05:30,129
Docs are iconic.

146
00:05:31,798 --> 00:05:33,433
- You doing Kegels over there?
- What's that?

147
00:05:33,466 --> 00:05:35,134
Why are you
squinting so much?

148
00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:36,269
Future's bright.

149
00:05:36,302 --> 00:05:38,571
I've been noticing you doing
that a lot more recently.

150
00:05:38,604 --> 00:05:41,040
I've noticed you doing it a wee
bits more than usuals, toos,

151
00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:42,809
- good buddies.
- No. I think you're squinting

152
00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:44,243
just the perfect
amount there, good buddy.

153
00:05:44,277 --> 00:05:46,145
You're having trouble
seeing, aren't you?

154
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:47,780
Got a bright future.

155
00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:49,749
When was the last time you went
to the optom-al-myth?

156
00:05:49,782 --> 00:05:53,720
Oh, that'd be our class trip
to Dr. McDavid's.

157
00:05:53,753 --> 00:05:55,655
- As in Grade 2?
- Grade 1.

158
00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:57,123
- Grade 1!
- What's the problem, Katy?

159
00:05:57,156 --> 00:05:58,891
- I'm making you an appointment.
- Don't you got

160
00:05:58,925 --> 00:06:00,560
a fucking Warped Tour
to get to or something?

161
00:06:00,593 --> 00:06:03,429
Why don't you go play fucking
rockabilly, fucking steampunk?

162
00:06:03,463 --> 00:06:05,798
- Fucking dance of the skanks.
- Fucking going straight edge.

163
00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:08,468
WAYNE: Get outta here,
you fucking stage diver!

164
00:06:08,501 --> 00:06:10,837
Say, where's
Dr. McDavid?

165
00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:13,439
Dr. McDavid my grandpa,
or Dr. McDavid my dad?

166
00:06:13,473 --> 00:06:17,009
- The doctors McDavid.
- Golf course. Or Legion.

167
00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,878
Yeah, 'cause I was just thinking
you're kind of young

168
00:06:18,911 --> 00:06:20,346
- to be a doctor, eh?
- I think when you get

169
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,582
to a certain age,
everyone seems young.

170
00:06:22,615 --> 00:06:24,083
Good enough.

171
00:06:24,117 --> 00:06:25,818
So, do you want the good news
first or the bad news?

172
00:06:25,852 --> 00:06:27,220
- Bad.
- You're dying.

173
00:06:27,253 --> 00:06:29,655
- I'll get my affairs in order.
- There's no bad news.

174
00:06:29,689 --> 00:06:31,424
Some people with your
vision get glasses,

175
00:06:31,457 --> 00:06:32,558
and some people don't.

176
00:06:32,592 --> 00:06:33,760
Well, then I'll save a buck.

177
00:06:33,793 --> 00:06:35,395
What prompted you to
get your eyes checked?

178
00:06:35,428 --> 00:06:37,063
I'm told I
squint too much.

179
00:06:37,096 --> 00:06:38,998
- You got a bright future.
- Thank you for your help.

180
00:06:39,031 --> 00:06:40,199
But if
the sun's bothering you--

181
00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:41,467
Well, the sun
doesn't bother me.

182
00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:43,136
--I could apply
your prescription

183
00:06:43,169 --> 00:06:45,805
to a very stylish
pair of sunglasses.

184
00:06:48,608 --> 00:06:52,111
Hmm...

185
00:07:04,157 --> 00:07:05,825
You playing
shortstop or second?

186
00:07:05,858 --> 00:07:07,160
- Eh?
- Left field?

187
00:07:07,193 --> 00:07:08,995
- Mind your beeswax.
- A little brisk out

188
00:07:09,028 --> 00:07:10,897
for beach volleyballs theres,
good buddies.

189
00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:12,398
Little warm for
'80s night on the slopes.

190
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,034
I could shake my head
in these all day.

191
00:07:15,067 --> 00:07:16,436
- They won't come off.
- Prove it.

192
00:07:16,469 --> 00:07:18,204
You look like you're about
to rip a Tour De France.

193
00:07:18,237 --> 00:07:20,506
Look like Lance Armstrong if
he did even more steroids.

194
00:07:20,540 --> 00:07:22,341
You look like the guy who's
gonna say something racist

195
00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:25,111
into camera at a
live-on-location news broadcast.

196
00:07:25,144 --> 00:07:27,079
I thought Jivin' Pete was
exposed to bes heres.

197
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:28,781
(Groaning)

198
00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:31,017
- What?
- Now, I'll shake my head.

199
00:07:31,050 --> 00:07:33,119
- He's fucking up.
- How late is he this times?

200
00:07:33,152 --> 00:07:34,954
- Doesn't matter.
- Late is late.

201
00:07:34,987 --> 00:07:36,756
Yeah. If you're not 10 minutes
early, you're late.

202
00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:38,591
He smells like a brewery
all morning

203
00:07:38,624 --> 00:07:40,593
and a dispensary
all afternoon.

204
00:07:40,626 --> 00:07:43,262
Smells like he pissed on a
campfire and stood in the smoke.

205
00:07:43,296 --> 00:07:44,464
Look who's talking.

206
00:07:44,497 --> 00:07:46,766
Tried to show me a nude of
a gal he had on his phone,

207
00:07:46,799 --> 00:07:48,901
and I said, "I, sirs,
ams a feminist."

208
00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:50,536
- Don't be that guy.
- Yeah.

209
00:07:50,570 --> 00:07:52,171
Definitely don't
be that guy.

210
00:07:52,205 --> 00:07:54,474
Oh... Do you want
to know what?

211
00:07:54,507 --> 00:07:57,143
- I feel bad for him.
- Who the fuck are you?

212
00:07:57,176 --> 00:07:58,945
Like, I'm not getting soft or
anything. Just, like--

213
00:07:58,978 --> 00:08:00,513
You're a fanny pack
full of cotton balls.

214
00:08:00,546 --> 00:08:02,982
It's like, it's likely not
easy getting yourself sorted

215
00:08:03,015 --> 00:08:05,318
after you been off smoking meth
for half a fucking decade.

216
00:08:05,351 --> 00:08:07,086
You're a
chocolate marshmallow Santa.

217
00:08:07,119 --> 00:08:09,288
- Here he is, doing it.
- You're baby hair, bud.

218
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,023
Just can't get out
of his own way.

219
00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:12,458
You know what?
I think those sunglasses

220
00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:16,095
are a wee bit tight on your
brain, big brother.

221
00:08:16,128 --> 00:08:18,064
But I ams
a feminists.

222
00:08:18,097 --> 00:08:21,033
Good, Dan.
Girls love that.

223
00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:22,802
Well, I was told
they don't.

224
00:08:22,835 --> 00:08:24,437
WAYNE:
Want to know what? Fuck it.

225
00:08:24,470 --> 00:08:26,706
I got to do something, because
he's fucking useless.

226
00:08:26,739 --> 00:08:27,840
- He is risen.
- Yeah.

227
00:08:27,874 --> 00:08:29,041
He's fucking
up lots, good buddy.

228
00:08:29,075 --> 00:08:30,877
Yeah. Shared those
nude pictures of Gails.

229
00:08:30,910 --> 00:08:32,411
- Abandoned his dog.
- Now, he's late

230
00:08:32,445 --> 00:08:34,347
every fucking day, and then
you give him a second chance.

231
00:08:34,380 --> 00:08:36,516
- And what does he do?
- Smells like a brewery

232
00:08:36,549 --> 00:08:38,918
all morning and a
dispensary all afternoon.

233
00:08:38,951 --> 00:08:41,220
- Time to cut him loose.
- I'll do something like that.

234
00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:44,323
- There he is.
- Just, uh...

235
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:46,559
don't like to kick people
when they're down.

236
00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:51,364
But... I ams a feminists.

237
00:08:51,397 --> 00:08:55,001
Never want to get your dick
sucked again, then, eh, bud?

238
00:09:01,340 --> 00:09:03,109
"I Speak Feminist."

239
00:09:03,142 --> 00:09:04,810
Yo. This guy
likes to party.

240
00:09:04,844 --> 00:09:06,245
You're not that
guy, are you?

241
00:09:06,279 --> 00:09:08,447
I will no longers bes brow-
beatens because of my beliefs.

242
00:09:08,481 --> 00:09:11,317
I'm a feminist, sirs,
and prouds ofs it.

243
00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:13,185
You know you can be one without
screaming it

244
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:15,021
in everybody's face,
though, right?

245
00:09:15,054 --> 00:09:17,390
Those who shout the loudest
have the most to hide.

246
00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:19,425
- Same thing goes for gals, too.
- (Yelling) Huh?

247
00:09:19,458 --> 00:09:21,861
There's no rights or wrongs
ways to bes a feminists.

248
00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:23,329
You mansplaining, bud?

249
00:09:23,362 --> 00:09:24,797
Never.

250
00:09:24,830 --> 00:09:26,265
Hey, boys.

251
00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:28,634
- There's womens presents.
- Okay, fine. Hey, guys.

252
00:09:28,668 --> 00:09:31,003
- That's not better.
- Fuck off.

253
00:09:31,037 --> 00:09:33,205
- So, it's my birthday week--
- Sorry. What?

254
00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:35,007
It's my
birthday week,

255
00:09:35,041 --> 00:09:38,678
and I want to celebrate
it with everyone I care about.

256
00:09:38,711 --> 00:09:41,514
So, I was wondering if you all
would meet me here tonight

257
00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:43,883
to celebrate the best
birthday week ever.

258
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:46,118
- You're that guy?
- What guy?

259
00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:49,088
The guy who makes way too big
a deal out of his own birthday.

260
00:09:49,121 --> 00:09:51,023
Only 13-year-old
girls can use

261
00:09:51,057 --> 00:09:53,125
the expression "birthday
week," you Sally.

262
00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:54,694
- I got this, buddy.
- Thanks, bud.

263
00:09:54,727 --> 00:09:56,429
Look. It's just been
a really--

264
00:09:56,462 --> 00:09:58,197
It's just been a really tough
week for everyone,

265
00:09:58,230 --> 00:09:59,865
with the degens
fucking with us again--

266
00:09:59,899 --> 00:10:01,300
Degens are fucking
with youse, too?

267
00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:03,369
Tibadoo got a job
driving the Zamboni,

268
00:10:03,402 --> 00:10:05,204
but he didn't
show up for work,

269
00:10:05,237 --> 00:10:08,007
and we had to play our beer
league game in an inch of snow.

270
00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:10,009
- Fuck youse, Tibadoos.
- And I just--

271
00:10:10,042 --> 00:10:11,844
I just think a
birthday week party

272
00:10:11,877 --> 00:10:13,346
is what we all need
right now.

273
00:10:13,379 --> 00:10:15,681
- Huh?
- And you're that guy?

274
00:10:15,715 --> 00:10:17,583
(Hesitantly)
Yes?

275
00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:19,952
The guy who knows what we
all need right now?

276
00:10:19,986 --> 00:10:22,054
What next? Anything that
that brings you

277
00:10:22,088 --> 00:10:24,023
mild satisfaction
is everything?

278
00:10:24,056 --> 00:10:26,392
And anyone doing anything
remotely relatable

279
00:10:26,425 --> 00:10:27,526
is "all of us"?

280
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,829
Gail, the new hand soap you got
in the bathroom

281
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:31,297
gives me life.

282
00:10:31,330 --> 00:10:33,399
Oh, my God, Katy.
That video you posted

283
00:10:33,432 --> 00:10:36,168
of Gus sleeping beside
his bowl is such a mood.

284
00:10:36,202 --> 00:10:38,904
You're not a tabloid
magazine's Twitter account.

285
00:10:38,938 --> 00:10:40,072
Stop talking
like that.

286
00:10:40,106 --> 00:10:41,641
Well, none of this
changes the fact

287
00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:44,710
that I still want to make,
uh, my birthday week--

288
00:10:44,744 --> 00:10:46,812
ALL:
Don't say "birthday week"!

289
00:10:46,846 --> 00:10:48,681
I wasn't going to!

290
00:10:48,714 --> 00:10:50,549
Birthday.

291
00:10:50,583 --> 00:10:53,152
But I do really want to
make a week out of it, so...

292
00:10:53,185 --> 00:10:55,287
We'll come to your
birthday party.

293
00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:57,323
- Thank you.
- You're early.

294
00:10:57,356 --> 00:10:59,025
If you're not 10 minutes
early, you're late.

295
00:10:59,058 --> 00:11:00,393
Fucking A, ma fille.

296
00:11:00,426 --> 00:11:02,361
Anik, it's my birthday
week, so I was--

297
00:11:02,395 --> 00:11:04,296
- Don't be that guy.
- Okay.

298
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:06,465
- Hi, Anik.
- Bonjour, Daryl.

299
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:08,467
(Snapping)

300
00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:11,103
Did youse know that those little
top ponies

301
00:11:11,137 --> 00:11:13,072
are still a thing
with dudes in Quebec?

302
00:11:13,105 --> 00:11:14,373
REILLY:
Like a-- like a top knot?

303
00:11:14,407 --> 00:11:15,975
GAIL: Kind of,
but gnarlier.

304
00:11:16,008 --> 00:11:17,843
Like a little
nubbin up there.

305
00:11:17,877 --> 00:11:19,679
Hmm. You don't say.

306
00:11:19,712 --> 00:11:22,081
DAN: Nothing wrong with a
guy shows-ing his feminine side,

307
00:11:22,114 --> 00:11:23,182
- sirs, especially--
- No.

308
00:11:23,215 --> 00:11:24,617
- No. Okay.
- I was watching

309
00:11:24,650 --> 00:11:27,286
some hockey fights from
the Quebec senior league,

310
00:11:27,319 --> 00:11:30,022
and I picked out two dozen
of those little nubbins

311
00:11:30,056 --> 00:11:31,424
in the crowd.

312
00:11:32,558 --> 00:11:33,759
REILLY:
Nubbin.

313
00:11:33,793 --> 00:11:35,194
Oh.

314
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:41,133
Now, there's a way
things run around here,

315
00:11:41,167 --> 00:11:43,703
and your work ethic
is slowing up production.

316
00:11:44,770 --> 00:11:46,605
Okay.

317
00:11:46,639 --> 00:11:49,175
I can see you're trying to turn
over a new leaf and all that,

318
00:11:49,208 --> 00:11:51,277
and I'm trying
to help you,

319
00:11:51,310 --> 00:11:52,678
but you're not reliable.

320
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:54,346
Okay.

321
00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:57,483
Feels to me like there
might be a problem.

322
00:11:57,516 --> 00:11:59,585
I wonder if it
mightn't be a bad idea

323
00:11:59,618 --> 00:12:03,422
for you to take some time
and get that sorted.

324
00:12:03,456 --> 00:12:04,290
You firing me?

325
00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:06,625
Did I say I was
firing you?

326
00:12:09,862 --> 00:12:11,263
Okay.

327
00:12:24,944 --> 00:12:26,712
Jivin's saying some
shit about you.

328
00:12:28,714 --> 00:12:30,149
And we know it's not true,

329
00:12:30,182 --> 00:12:31,817
but we want you to know
it's being said.

330
00:12:31,851 --> 00:12:33,385
He came to
us for some contraband

331
00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:35,821
an hour or so ago,
and he was indignant,

332
00:12:35,855 --> 00:12:37,790
irked, ireful,
ill-tempered!

333
00:12:37,823 --> 00:12:39,492
He said you
called us fags.

334
00:12:41,627 --> 00:12:43,596
We know you wouldn't
say that, so...

335
00:12:43,629 --> 00:12:45,931
We just wanted you to
know it was being said.

336
00:12:45,965 --> 00:12:48,167
(Vehicle approaching)

337
00:12:53,839 --> 00:12:55,207
MCMURRAY:
Wayne.

338
00:12:56,142 --> 00:12:58,077
How are you, now?

339
00:12:58,110 --> 00:12:59,545
- Good, and you?
- Not so bad.

340
00:12:59,578 --> 00:13:03,382
Wayne, Jivin' come to the house
looking for a hot tub.

341
00:13:03,415 --> 00:13:05,050
Now, he's
an old pal, so,

342
00:13:05,084 --> 00:13:06,819
you know, I entertained
the idea,

343
00:13:06,852 --> 00:13:09,789
but then he had the audacity,
the little rat bastard,

344
00:13:09,822 --> 00:13:12,424
to say that when he
was here working with youse,

345
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:15,127
that youse guys were saying
you'd like to fuck my old lady,

346
00:13:15,161 --> 00:13:16,495
Mrs. McMurray!

347
00:13:19,598 --> 00:13:21,901
Now, I know
you wouldn't say it.

348
00:13:23,202 --> 00:13:26,338
I'm just letting you know,
it's being said.

349
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:30,009
We know you
wouldn't say it.

350
00:13:30,042 --> 00:13:33,813
But, like... if you did...

351
00:13:33,846 --> 00:13:35,848
(Vehicle approaching)

352
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:43,289
(Truck doors closing)

353
00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:48,160
Jivin' was talking shit about
you in the MoDean's parking lot.

354
00:13:48,194 --> 00:13:49,929
Dan went to punched him.
He ducked out.

355
00:13:49,962 --> 00:13:52,398
Dary went to chase him,
but he couldn't catch him.

356
00:13:55,067 --> 00:13:56,368
Well, that's
the difference

357
00:13:56,402 --> 00:13:58,704
between a friend
and a pal.

358
00:13:58,737 --> 00:14:02,408
A pal will listen to someone
talk shit about you.

359
00:14:02,441 --> 00:14:04,076
A friend won't hear
a second of it.

360
00:14:04,109 --> 00:14:05,344
Degens are back.

361
00:14:05,377 --> 00:14:07,179
Degens ain't
welcomes.

362
00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:08,981
How we going
to fuck this pig?

363
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:15,087
Hi.

364
00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:16,922
Daryl!

365
00:14:16,956 --> 00:14:17,990
What?

366
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:19,525
You're that guy?

367
00:14:20,559 --> 00:14:21,894
(Both laughing)

368
00:14:21,927 --> 00:14:23,295
BOTH:
Oh, my God!

369
00:14:23,329 --> 00:14:25,764
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

370
00:14:25,798 --> 00:14:27,700
- I tried to tell him.
- Nothing wrongs

371
00:14:27,733 --> 00:14:29,501
with showings your
feminine sides, Darys.

372
00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:31,370
Take your hair down,
you fucking woman.

373
00:14:31,403 --> 00:14:32,838
You going to rip
some Ultimate later?

374
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,407
- You mean Ultimate Frisbee?
- Guess not.

375
00:14:35,441 --> 00:14:37,343
If you were, you would know they
just call it Ultimate.

376
00:14:37,376 --> 00:14:39,478
You going for glamour
shots later or something?

377
00:14:39,511 --> 00:14:41,447
Well, okay. You said
dudes from Quebec

378
00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:43,716
have tiny little top knots up
there, so I thought maybe--

379
00:14:43,749 --> 00:14:45,651
Daryl.

380
00:14:45,684 --> 00:14:48,153
Mm. Hello, Anik.

381
00:14:48,187 --> 00:14:49,989
Trying something new?

382
00:14:50,022 --> 00:14:53,125
This? Oh. (Chuckling)
You noticed.

383
00:14:53,158 --> 00:14:54,960
You look like
all my cousints.

384
00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:57,529
(Skids laughing)

385
00:14:57,563 --> 00:14:59,765
- That was hot.
- That was...

386
00:14:59,798 --> 00:15:02,401
It's good to be known for
something, Daryl.

387
00:15:02,434 --> 00:15:05,237
And there is nothing wrong
with being... that guy.

388
00:15:05,271 --> 00:15:07,172
For instance,
I wear a bowler hat.

389
00:15:07,206 --> 00:15:08,507
(Snapping)
I'm that guy.

390
00:15:08,540 --> 00:15:10,676
Yeah, and I wear a bandana.
I'm that guy.

391
00:15:10,709 --> 00:15:11,877
Thank you, skids.

392
00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:12,945
Just don't be...

393
00:15:12,978 --> 00:15:14,046
BOTH:
That guy!

394
00:15:14,079 --> 00:15:15,314
(Both laughing)

395
00:15:15,347 --> 00:15:17,182
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

396
00:15:17,216 --> 00:15:18,984
Hey, Gails, what
guys are youse?

397
00:15:19,018 --> 00:15:20,552
- In a town this size?
- Yeah.

398
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,755
- The black guy.
- The great David Beckham

399
00:15:22,788 --> 00:15:26,058
could barely pull
that off, you fool.

400
00:15:26,091 --> 00:15:27,493
Bender like
Beckham. (Laughing)

401
00:15:27,526 --> 00:15:30,562
Hilarious coming from
A Clockwork Orange.

402
00:15:30,596 --> 00:15:31,931
- What?
- KATY: They're right.

403
00:15:31,964 --> 00:15:34,466
You're no
Jon Snow, bud.

404
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,502
Don't you have a Mighty Mighty
Bosstones show to get to?

405
00:15:36,535 --> 00:15:38,070
I'm more of
a Rancid gal.

406
00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:39,338
What's with
the hat, Dan?

407
00:15:39,371 --> 00:15:41,040
- I, sirs, am--
- Just kidding.

408
00:15:41,073 --> 00:15:43,008
- I don't give a fuck.
- Why would you ask him, then?

409
00:15:43,042 --> 00:15:44,043
That was so rude!

410
00:15:44,076 --> 00:15:45,811
(All talking
at once)

411
00:15:45,844 --> 00:15:48,347
(Angrily talking over
each other)

412
00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:02,328
(Spitting)

413
00:16:06,265 --> 00:16:07,666
What happens
now, Wayne?

414
00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:10,135
You start walking in
this direction,

415
00:16:10,169 --> 00:16:11,704
or you start running
in the other one.

416
00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:14,239
Yeah? You going
to chase me?

417
00:16:14,273 --> 00:16:16,442
No. You've done
what you've done.

418
00:16:16,475 --> 00:16:18,143
And if you want
to humiliate yourself

419
00:16:18,177 --> 00:16:19,778
right here in front
of all your pals

420
00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:23,649
by not taking responsibility
for it when the time's come...

421
00:16:23,682 --> 00:16:25,551
well, that's
enough for me.

422
00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:28,487
And what if we just
beat the shit out of you

423
00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:29,989
right here
and right now?

424
00:16:30,022 --> 00:16:33,592
I'm not leaving here without
some sort of resolution.

425
00:16:34,693 --> 00:16:36,795
I came to work
every single day,

426
00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:39,465
and I poured my heart
and soul into that job.

427
00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:41,133
And you tell me I'm
slowing up production

428
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:42,301
to try to fire me?

429
00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:43,769
I never said
I was firing you.

430
00:16:43,802 --> 00:16:46,405
I've been chore-ing
20 years!

431
00:16:46,438 --> 00:16:48,474
Twenty years, and no
one's ever told me

432
00:16:48,507 --> 00:16:51,143
I was slowing
up production in my life!

433
00:16:52,978 --> 00:16:55,981
So maybe you ought to take a
good, hard look in the mirror,

434
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:59,818
do some thinking about which
one of us is the real problem,

435
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:03,689
because the only person with
an issue here... is you.

436
00:17:03,722 --> 00:17:06,859
Youse have upset a lot
of people in town.

437
00:17:06,892 --> 00:17:10,696
Yeah? Well, it's a good
thing I'm from upcountry.

438
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:13,032
But in spite of
all that--

439
00:17:13,065 --> 00:17:14,400
Despite.

440
00:17:14,433 --> 00:17:16,935
- Despite what?
- Never mind.

441
00:17:16,969 --> 00:17:18,704
In spite of
all that,

442
00:17:18,737 --> 00:17:20,739
I'm going to give you
a little pass,

443
00:17:20,773 --> 00:17:23,909
prove to you I'm not
the man you think I am!

444
00:17:23,942 --> 00:17:25,344
So, go.
Go, go, go.

445
00:17:25,377 --> 00:17:27,713
Gather up some of
your pals,

446
00:17:27,746 --> 00:17:31,316
and when youse are ready
to sort this out...

447
00:17:31,350 --> 00:17:33,352
we'll be
right here waiting.

448
00:17:33,385 --> 00:17:35,554
(Brendan Canning "Plugged In")

449
00:17:35,587 --> 00:17:40,659
♪

450
00:17:40,692 --> 00:17:45,197
♪ What comes of...
(Singing indistinctly) ♪

451
00:17:51,403 --> 00:17:56,108
♪ Too much waiting... ♪

452
00:17:56,141 --> 00:18:00,646
(Singing indistinctly)

453
00:18:00,679 --> 00:18:05,117
♪ ...not working ♪

454
00:18:05,150 --> 00:18:09,588
♪ Your way is to... ♪

455
00:18:09,621 --> 00:18:14,426
♪ A holiday ♪

456
00:18:14,460 --> 00:18:19,131
♪ The holidays ♪

457
00:18:19,164 --> 00:18:22,334
♪ I can take ♪

458
00:18:22,367 --> 00:18:32,578
♪

459
00:18:33,378 --> 00:18:43,589
♪

460
00:18:45,390 --> 00:18:49,027
♪ Same ♪

461
00:18:49,061 --> 00:18:52,264
♪ For you ♪

462
00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:55,167
♪ As me ♪

463
00:18:57,436 --> 00:19:02,207
♪ Please come here ♪

464
00:19:02,241 --> 00:19:05,144
(Singing indistinctly)

465
00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:11,617
♪ Words keep on wanting ♪

466
00:19:11,650 --> 00:19:16,321
♪ The points to ♪

467
00:19:16,355 --> 00:19:20,659
♪ The message ♪

468
00:19:20,692 --> 00:19:25,264
♪ No more messages ♪

469
00:19:25,297 --> 00:19:29,001
♪ I can take ♪

470
00:19:29,034 --> 00:19:39,044
♪

471
00:19:40,045 --> 00:19:50,055
♪

472
00:19:51,056 --> 00:20:01,066
♪

473
00:20:02,100 --> 00:20:12,110
♪

474
00:20:15,247 --> 00:20:19,218
♪ Fella ♪

475
00:20:19,251 --> 00:20:24,590
♪

476
00:20:24,623 --> 00:20:29,428
♪ Today is what... ♪

477
00:20:29,461 --> 00:20:31,663
♪ Is done ♪

478
00:20:34,266 --> 00:20:36,268
♪ I love you ♪

479
00:20:39,071 --> 00:20:42,140
♪ Your holiday ♪

480
00:20:43,575 --> 00:20:46,645
♪ No more holidays ♪

481
00:20:48,447 --> 00:20:50,148
♪ I can take ♪

482
00:20:50,449 --> 00:21:00,659
♪

483
00:21:01,493 --> 00:21:11,703
♪

484
00:21:16,975 --> 00:21:26,985
♪

485
00:21:27,986 --> 00:21:34,960
♪

486
00:21:37,996 --> 00:21:39,965
♪ Fella ♪

487
00:21:39,998 --> 00:21:44,069
♪