1 00:00:10,066 --> 00:00:11,400 You were huckin' the ball around 2 00:00:11,433 --> 00:00:12,666 with your pals the other day... 3 00:00:13,633 --> 00:00:15,266 Say, uh... 4 00:00:15,300 --> 00:00:17,800 What's the deal with your sweetie there, Squirrely Dan? 5 00:00:17,833 --> 00:00:19,300 Well, I took her out last night. 6 00:00:19,333 --> 00:00:22,166 ‐Where to? ‐Outs to the chip truck. 7 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:24,466 ‐Fries and gravy? ‐I had mine with gravy. 8 00:00:24,500 --> 00:00:26,466 She had hers with salts and malts vinegar. 9 00:00:26,500 --> 00:00:28,066 Do you know that salt and malt vinegar's 10 00:00:28,100 --> 00:00:29,200 a non‐traditional way to dress your French fries 11 00:00:29,233 --> 00:00:30,333 in the United States? 12 00:00:30,366 --> 00:00:31,766 What the fuck is wrong with them? 13 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:33,500 Like malt vinegar is not a staple condiment 14 00:00:33,533 --> 00:00:35,600 on tabletops in restaurants in the United States. 15 00:00:35,633 --> 00:00:36,700 Fuck, figure it out. 16 00:00:36,733 --> 00:00:38,266 That's what I say. I say, figure it out. 17 00:00:38,300 --> 00:00:40,200 Got no vinegars on the tables, no Krafts peanut butters. 18 00:00:40,233 --> 00:00:41,666 WAYNE: Figure it out. DARYL: Fuckin' figure it out. 19 00:00:41,700 --> 00:00:43,700 Better not forget those fuckin' all‐dressed chips. 20 00:00:43,733 --> 00:00:45,566 No ketchup chips neither. 21 00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:47,333 WAYNE: Figure it out. 22 00:00:47,366 --> 00:00:48,800 Somebody really ought to write a letter. 23 00:00:48,833 --> 00:00:51,333 They do got six different types of Cap'n Crunch, though. 24 00:00:51,366 --> 00:00:52,566 How do you know that? 25 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:55,033 Saw a comedian talks about it on the Juste Pour Rires. 26 00:00:55,066 --> 00:00:56,333 Can't remember his name, though. 27 00:00:56,366 --> 00:00:57,533 Good guy, though? 28 00:00:57,566 --> 00:00:58,700 A little long‐winded for my taste. 29 00:00:58,733 --> 00:01:00,333 But, yeah, a pretty good guy. 30 00:01:00,366 --> 00:01:01,366 Well, glad to hear he's a good guy at least. 31 00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:02,366 They have running water down there? 32 00:01:03,433 --> 00:01:04,633 Anyhoo, 33 00:01:04,666 --> 00:01:06,466 the evening went so well that, uh, 34 00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:08,733 we got up to a little bits of a foolin' around. 35 00:01:08,766 --> 00:01:09,566 Did you French her? 36 00:01:09,600 --> 00:01:11,333 WAYNE: Kind of out of line there, Dary. 37 00:01:11,366 --> 00:01:12,600 Did you go up her shirt? 38 00:01:12,633 --> 00:01:13,700 Now you're really out of line, Dary. 39 00:01:13,733 --> 00:01:16,233 We did French, that much I will reveal. 40 00:01:16,266 --> 00:01:17,733 Well, you already revealed that much, 41 00:01:17,766 --> 00:01:19,433 might as well just tell us if you went up her shirt. 42 00:01:19,466 --> 00:01:21,600 It's impolite to kiss and tell, Dary. 43 00:01:21,633 --> 00:01:24,066 I don't like to kiss and tell, but... 44 00:01:24,100 --> 00:01:25,633 The Frenchin's tooks a hard left turn, 45 00:01:25,666 --> 00:01:27,066 from which I have yets to recover. 46 00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:30,800 Do you wanna know what? 47 00:01:30,833 --> 00:01:33,033 I'm not asking you to kiss and tell, 48 00:01:33,066 --> 00:01:34,266 'cause that's impolite. 49 00:01:34,300 --> 00:01:35,300 But... 50 00:01:36,266 --> 00:01:37,666 I'm kind of curious. 51 00:01:37,700 --> 00:01:39,500 Yeah, Dan, kiss and tell. 52 00:01:39,533 --> 00:01:43,066 I'm sure you boys have had a couple of curve balls 53 00:01:43,100 --> 00:01:45,100 thrown your way betwixt the sheets. 54 00:01:46,733 --> 00:01:49,566 Well, not to be impolite, but, 55 00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:52,300 you know, sometimes a gal will be kissin' around 56 00:01:52,333 --> 00:01:54,533 on, like, the area near your genitals, 57 00:01:54,566 --> 00:01:57,100 but not quite on your genitals. 58 00:01:57,133 --> 00:01:58,500 Makes me ticklish and insecure. 59 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:02,200 You know, not to be impolite, 60 00:02:02,233 --> 00:02:04,666 but sometimes a gal will do some kissin' on the ears, 61 00:02:04,700 --> 00:02:06,033 which makes me uncomfortable, 62 00:02:06,066 --> 00:02:07,433 because even though I clean my ears, 63 00:02:07,466 --> 00:02:09,366 sometimes a tater will just roll out of there unexpected. 64 00:02:11,100 --> 00:02:12,333 (CHUCKLES) 65 00:02:12,366 --> 00:02:14,233 I kind of likes both those things. 66 00:02:14,266 --> 00:02:15,733 Yeah, it's why you're called "Squirrely Dan." 67 00:02:15,766 --> 00:02:17,400 Yeah, reason fuckin' five million. 68 00:02:18,533 --> 00:02:20,500 Well, nots to be impolite, but... 69 00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:24,066 This gal suggested that 70 00:02:25,733 --> 00:02:27,366 maybe I should have some 71 00:02:28,566 --> 00:02:30,033 attentions paid 72 00:02:32,066 --> 00:02:33,200 to my butts hole. 73 00:02:38,233 --> 00:02:39,366 That ever... 74 00:02:40,633 --> 00:02:42,766 Ever happen to you guys? 75 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:45,033 Did you ever have a gal suggest that you need 76 00:02:45,733 --> 00:02:47,133 some attentions paid 77 00:02:49,100 --> 00:02:50,333 to your butts holes? 78 00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:03,100 I'll take that as a hard no, I guess? 79 00:03:04,366 --> 00:03:06,500 She put a couple of fingers up there and... 80 00:03:08,633 --> 00:03:10,100 It turns out you got a... 81 00:03:10,133 --> 00:03:11,600 An erogenous zone up there. 82 00:03:11,633 --> 00:03:14,100 Found... Found the hot button and... 83 00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:17,066 Gaves it a tickle and, uh... 84 00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:21,166 Yeah. Feels, uh... 85 00:03:22,233 --> 00:03:24,666 It feels pretty good, you guys, okay? 86 00:03:24,700 --> 00:03:26,500 ‐Pop fly. ‐I really liked it. 87 00:03:31,133 --> 00:03:33,133 It felt... Felt very natural. 88 00:03:37,566 --> 00:03:38,433 Nice. 89 00:03:38,466 --> 00:03:40,100 That's how you get the body in front of it. 90 00:03:40,133 --> 00:03:41,166 Get the body in front of it. 91 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:42,766 They call it "milking the prostate." 92 00:03:45,533 --> 00:03:47,433 Well, it's impolite to kiss and tell. 93 00:03:48,333 --> 00:03:50,333 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) 94 00:04:03,500 --> 00:04:05,766 ‐Where's Stewart been, Katy? ‐He's not talking to me. 95 00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:07,533 ‐Why? ‐I don't know. 96 00:04:07,566 --> 00:04:09,266 Here are your birthday pancakes, big brother. 97 00:04:09,300 --> 00:04:10,566 Don't fuck with tradition. 98 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:11,633 ‐Thank you. ‐You're welcome. 99 00:04:11,666 --> 00:04:13,200 BOTH: Happy birthday, Wayne. 100 00:04:13,233 --> 00:04:15,100 Jinx. You owe me a Coke. 101 00:04:15,133 --> 00:04:16,433 Well, see now, that you can get in the States. 102 00:04:16,466 --> 00:04:18,266 What you can't get, though, is Crush Cream Soda. 103 00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:20,333 BOTH: We got you a present, Wayne. 104 00:04:20,366 --> 00:04:21,800 Two Cokes. 105 00:04:21,833 --> 00:04:23,366 We don't make a thing of birthdays in this family. 106 00:04:23,400 --> 00:04:24,733 Can we skip my super‐soft birthday party then this year? 107 00:04:24,766 --> 00:04:26,400 Hard no! 108 00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:28,100 It's not a birthday thing, it's an efficiency thing. 109 00:04:28,133 --> 00:04:29,566 Uh, if you can be one thing, you should be efficient. 110 00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:31,600 We got you an appointment with a matchmaker. 111 00:04:31,633 --> 00:04:33,366 Get the... Take a... 112 00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:34,600 Well, start walkin'. 113 00:04:34,633 --> 00:04:36,166 Well, you won't do online dating. 114 00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:38,333 There's no more MoDeans, so you can't meet girls there. 115 00:04:38,366 --> 00:04:39,600 You're handcuffed, cowboy. 116 00:04:39,633 --> 00:04:41,066 ‐Figure it out. ‐Yeah, figures it out. 117 00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:42,166 Don't you tell me to figure it out. 118 00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:43,566 Yous are the ones should figure it out. 119 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:45,233 All you have to do is sit down with a matchmaker, 120 00:04:45,266 --> 00:04:46,700 answer a few questions, 121 00:04:46,733 --> 00:04:48,600 and then she sets you up on three dates with girls 122 00:04:48,633 --> 00:04:49,733 that she thinks you'll jive with. 123 00:04:49,766 --> 00:04:51,400 Has anyone heard from Jivin' Pete lately? 124 00:04:51,433 --> 00:04:52,800 Oh, yeah, yeah. 125 00:04:52,833 --> 00:04:54,466 No, Jivin' Pete's one nut got all swole up... 126 00:04:54,500 --> 00:04:56,433 I don't give a shit about Jivin' Pete's one nut. 127 00:04:56,466 --> 00:04:58,266 No, no, this is a story about Jivin' Pete's other nut. 128 00:04:58,300 --> 00:04:59,533 Yeah, Jivin' Pete's had himself 129 00:04:59,566 --> 00:05:01,366 a botched vasectomy a little while back, 130 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:02,733 so now his one nut's there all swole up 131 00:05:02,766 --> 00:05:04,800 bigger than the first nut that was all swole up. 132 00:05:04,833 --> 00:05:06,533 If you can believes that nonsense. 133 00:05:06,566 --> 00:05:07,800 Was Jivin' showin' it to people again? 134 00:05:07,833 --> 00:05:09,600 Oh, he's showin' it to people. I seen it. 135 00:05:09,633 --> 00:05:11,266 ‐You seen it, Dary? ‐Oh, I seen it. 136 00:05:11,300 --> 00:05:13,133 ‐Yeah, I never seen it. ‐It looks like a rambutan. 137 00:05:13,166 --> 00:05:15,033 Which is to say, this hairy fruit. 138 00:05:15,066 --> 00:05:16,166 So, not smooth like a persimmon? 139 00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:18,333 DAN: No, although it is about the size of a persimmons. 140 00:05:18,366 --> 00:05:20,133 Which, of course, is much like a tomatoes. 141 00:05:20,166 --> 00:05:22,133 What sort of potent peace pipe was some prick pulling off 142 00:05:22,166 --> 00:05:23,433 when he titled tomatoes "fruits"? 143 00:05:24,333 --> 00:05:25,600 Well... 144 00:05:25,633 --> 00:05:27,733 Now both Jivin' Pete's nuts have a story, 145 00:05:27,766 --> 00:05:30,366 which I hope guarantees that I'll never have to listen 146 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:32,533 to another story about Jivin' Pete's nuts. 147 00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,333 ‐He's a good guy. ‐He's a real good guy. 148 00:05:34,366 --> 00:05:35,633 ‐No, he's a great guy. ‐Wayne. 149 00:05:35,666 --> 00:05:36,700 You're looking for love. 150 00:05:36,733 --> 00:05:38,200 And you said it yourself, 151 00:05:38,233 --> 00:05:40,066 "If you can be one thing, be efficient." 152 00:05:40,100 --> 00:05:41,233 Do's it once, do's it rights. 153 00:05:41,266 --> 00:05:42,466 ‐Figures it out. ‐Pitter patter, 154 00:05:42,500 --> 00:05:43,766 let's get at 'er, figure it out. 155 00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:45,433 You shouldn't gang up on people on their birthdays. 156 00:05:45,466 --> 00:05:47,466 We don't make a thing of birthdays in this family. 157 00:05:47,500 --> 00:05:48,733 She's comin' this afternoon. 158 00:05:48,766 --> 00:05:50,200 Don't be in your barnin' clothes. 159 00:05:50,233 --> 00:05:51,366 (SPOON SCRAPING) 160 00:05:56,500 --> 00:05:58,133 I fuckin' hate praccy, bro. 161 00:05:58,166 --> 00:06:00,700 It's Senior‐A whale shit, bro. Why even praccy? 162 00:06:00,733 --> 00:06:02,700 Like, I'm just gonna praccy like a donkey. 163 00:06:02,733 --> 00:06:04,066 I could donk all day. 164 00:06:04,100 --> 00:06:06,100 Just blast clappers at the hash marks 165 00:06:06,133 --> 00:06:07,466 at the fuckin' plug tendy of ours. 166 00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:09,166 Clappys from the hashys, buddy. 167 00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:10,700 Just steppin' into one from the ladies' tees. 168 00:06:10,733 --> 00:06:12,300 Just bulldoze that speed bump. 169 00:06:12,333 --> 00:06:13,600 Just firin' ringers at his ears. 170 00:06:13,633 --> 00:06:14,733 Just firin' warm‐up ringers. 171 00:06:14,766 --> 00:06:16,766 Just tossin' chest‐high sauce at the boys. 172 00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:19,233 Just tossin' ankle‐high rocket sauce. 173 00:06:19,266 --> 00:06:20,700 Just tossin' mad sui's up the middle. 174 00:06:20,733 --> 00:06:22,366 Just tossin' mad sui's through the trolley tracks. 175 00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:24,133 Just tossin' mad breakout sui's 176 00:06:24,166 --> 00:06:25,300 directly into the skates. 177 00:06:25,333 --> 00:06:27,133 Just tossin' mad breakout sui's. 178 00:06:29,133 --> 00:06:30,433 You know, it might be a fun praccy after all. 179 00:06:30,466 --> 00:06:32,433 I could donk all day, boys. 180 00:06:32,466 --> 00:06:33,766 (MUTTERING) 181 00:06:37,733 --> 00:06:41,333 I don't think I've ever sat on a hay bale before. 182 00:06:41,366 --> 00:06:44,066 That's a straw bale, and that's barley. 183 00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:47,066 Wonderful. 184 00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:48,566 Great. Um... 185 00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:50,133 So, a little bit about me. 186 00:06:50,166 --> 00:06:51,766 Uh, my service is called 187 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:54,200 "Goldilocks and the Three Dates." 188 00:06:54,233 --> 00:06:55,333 Katy... 189 00:06:55,366 --> 00:06:57,266 I forgot to tell her not to tell you that. 190 00:06:57,300 --> 00:06:58,633 So, I've modeled my business 191 00:06:58,666 --> 00:07:01,700 after the charming story that it's inspired by. 192 00:07:01,733 --> 00:07:04,233 I send my clients on three dates, 193 00:07:04,266 --> 00:07:07,500 and like the beds that Goldilocks laid down in 194 00:07:07,533 --> 00:07:10,633 after eating the three bears' porridge, 195 00:07:10,666 --> 00:07:15,766 maybe one is "too hard," and maybe one is "too soft." 196 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:20,466 But in the end we hope that maybe one is just right. 197 00:07:20,500 --> 00:07:21,666 Katy... 198 00:07:21,700 --> 00:07:23,100 Get after it. You're losin' him. 199 00:07:23,133 --> 00:07:25,466 Okay. Wayne, why don't you just 200 00:07:25,500 --> 00:07:27,200 tell me a little bit about yourself. 201 00:07:27,233 --> 00:07:29,233 It's impolite to talk about yourself. 202 00:07:29,266 --> 00:07:32,333 Keeps his truck clean. Loves his dogs. 203 00:07:32,366 --> 00:07:34,400 Enjoys a beer and a smoke. 204 00:07:34,433 --> 00:07:36,400 Beer... Beer and smoke. 205 00:07:36,433 --> 00:07:38,266 That's... Wow, you know. 206 00:07:38,300 --> 00:07:39,700 I get it. Rustic. 207 00:07:39,733 --> 00:07:41,133 Trucks, got it. 208 00:07:41,166 --> 00:07:43,366 We will make this work. I love it, okay. 209 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:45,066 And then, um, Wayne, can you just tell me 210 00:07:45,100 --> 00:07:47,466 a little bit about your past relationship? 211 00:07:47,500 --> 00:07:49,433 You shouldn't air your dirty laundry. 212 00:07:49,466 --> 00:07:51,266 Five years. Ended a while ago. 213 00:07:51,300 --> 00:07:52,466 No baggage. 214 00:07:52,500 --> 00:07:55,433 No baggage, love that. No baggage, no babies. 215 00:07:55,466 --> 00:07:57,133 Likey. (LAUGHING) 216 00:07:58,200 --> 00:07:59,233 This is fun. 217 00:07:59,266 --> 00:08:02,200 I'm having a fun time in this place. 218 00:08:02,233 --> 00:08:03,533 And, Wayne, can you tell me 219 00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:04,766 how much you make in a fiscal year? 220 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:06,066 WAYNE: Katy! 221 00:08:06,100 --> 00:08:07,633 It's impolite to talk about your money. 222 00:08:07,666 --> 00:08:08,766 He's no slouch. 223 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,600 Okay. Touche. 224 00:08:10,633 --> 00:08:14,466 Well, I'm about to begin your story. 225 00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:17,233 Where maybe one is "too hard." 226 00:08:17,266 --> 00:08:20,600 Maybe one is, um... 227 00:08:20,633 --> 00:08:23,100 ‐But in the end... ‐Yeah, you lost him. 228 00:08:24,166 --> 00:08:25,633 He seems... He seems nice. 229 00:08:28,133 --> 00:08:29,533 Do you live... 230 00:08:29,566 --> 00:08:30,733 Do you live in here? 231 00:08:31,733 --> 00:08:33,066 So, what did you think of 232 00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:35,066 Goldilocks and the Three Dates there, Wayne? 233 00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:36,633 Ready to fall in Goldi‐love? 234 00:08:37,366 --> 00:08:39,466 Or Goldi‐lust? 235 00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:42,200 You won't be Goldi‐laughin' when I break your Goldi‐legs. 236 00:08:42,233 --> 00:08:43,500 Dim the Goldi‐lights? 237 00:08:43,533 --> 00:08:46,200 Nights of your Goldi‐life? 238 00:08:46,233 --> 00:08:48,433 Use your Goldi‐language. Make her Goldi‐laugh. 239 00:08:48,466 --> 00:08:49,766 Make it Goldi‐last. 240 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,300 Better Goldi‐lay off, before they find 241 00:08:51,333 --> 00:08:52,733 your Goldi‐limbs in a Goldi‐landfill, 242 00:08:52,766 --> 00:08:54,733 Goldi‐literally. 243 00:08:54,766 --> 00:08:56,133 Take her on a Goldi‐lunch? 244 00:08:56,166 --> 00:08:57,700 Maybe a Goldi‐late suppers? 245 00:08:58,833 --> 00:09:01,066 ‐Maybe she's a Goldi‐lawyer. ‐Ooh. 246 00:09:01,100 --> 00:09:03,266 You think I'm Goldi‐lyin'? Enough Goldi‐lip. 247 00:09:03,300 --> 00:09:05,133 A Goldi‐longshoresman will find your bodies 248 00:09:05,166 --> 00:09:06,233 in the Goldi‐lake! 249 00:09:07,633 --> 00:09:11,166 Gentlemen, a question. A query. 250 00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:14,066 ‐An inquis... ‐Pitter patter. 251 00:09:14,100 --> 00:09:16,700 Has Katy mentioned anything about me not talking to her? 252 00:09:16,733 --> 00:09:19,066 ‐Can confirm. ‐Major league. 253 00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:20,433 ‐It's working. ‐What's working? 254 00:09:20,466 --> 00:09:22,066 By not talking to her, she will form the conclusion 255 00:09:22,100 --> 00:09:24,666 that I'm upset with her and eventually ask me why. 256 00:09:24,700 --> 00:09:26,133 Why you so butt‐hurt, Stewart? 257 00:09:27,666 --> 00:09:28,700 ‐Well, she acts like... ‐Just kidding. 258 00:09:28,733 --> 00:09:30,233 ‐I don't give a fuck. ‐DAN: Wait. 259 00:09:30,266 --> 00:09:31,300 So, you're upsets with her, 260 00:09:31,333 --> 00:09:34,300 and you wanna communicate that by not communicatings? 261 00:09:34,333 --> 00:09:36,100 Acutely. 262 00:09:36,133 --> 00:09:38,166 You are spare parts, aren't you, bud? 263 00:09:39,833 --> 00:09:41,466 Let me know if Katy asks about me. 264 00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:45,166 Heads up! 265 00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:46,266 Ow! 266 00:09:49,766 --> 00:09:51,200 (MUSIC PLAYING) 267 00:10:01,766 --> 00:10:03,166 I'm Kim. 268 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:04,500 I'm a psychologist and a feminist. 269 00:10:04,533 --> 00:10:06,266 ‐I'll be paying the bill. ‐I'm Wayne. 270 00:10:07,166 --> 00:10:08,200 Wayne! 271 00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:09,466 Glen. How are you now? 272 00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:11,600 ‐Ah, good and you? ‐Oh, not so bad. 273 00:10:11,633 --> 00:10:14,133 Well, I guess the kitten's out of the clutch on this one. 274 00:10:14,166 --> 00:10:16,300 I also have to work as a waitress 275 00:10:16,333 --> 00:10:17,366 to make ends meet. 276 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:18,766 ‐WAYNE: Sure you do. ‐I'm Kim. 277 00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:20,066 Are you ever. 278 00:10:20,100 --> 00:10:21,533 Look at you. I'm lovin' this. 279 00:10:21,566 --> 00:10:23,366 You're like a shark. I'm scared. 280 00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,500 Like a Julie Moore, or like a Jessie Chastain. 281 00:10:25,533 --> 00:10:27,766 ‐What can I get you to drink? ‐Uh, we'll need a minute. 282 00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:30,066 Uh, please and thank you. 283 00:10:30,100 --> 00:10:31,200 Hmm. All right. 284 00:10:31,233 --> 00:10:33,166 Well, you'll take care of little Miss Nicki Kidman here 285 00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:35,033 till I get back, Mr. McConaughey? 286 00:10:35,066 --> 00:10:36,233 ‐Sure, I will. ‐All right. 287 00:10:38,233 --> 00:10:40,033 He crosses his arms. 288 00:10:40,066 --> 00:10:42,100 Are you aware of the psychology behind that? 289 00:10:42,133 --> 00:10:43,166 Now, when you say "he," 290 00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:44,566 you're talking about me, right? 291 00:10:44,600 --> 00:10:46,133 He has wit. 292 00:10:46,166 --> 00:10:47,633 Do you know why you cross your arms? 293 00:10:47,666 --> 00:10:49,700 Feels like you're talking to two people right now. 294 00:10:49,733 --> 00:10:51,266 Crossing your arms, 295 00:10:51,300 --> 00:10:52,600 whether it be consciously or subconsciously, 296 00:10:52,633 --> 00:10:54,100 is a sign of defense. 297 00:10:54,133 --> 00:10:55,700 You're protecting your vital organs. 298 00:10:55,733 --> 00:10:57,033 Do you feel threatened by me? 299 00:10:57,066 --> 00:10:58,700 Well, I don't, but the other guy might. 300 00:10:58,733 --> 00:11:00,733 He is hilarious. 301 00:11:00,766 --> 00:11:02,533 Enough psychology for now. 302 00:11:02,566 --> 00:11:04,500 What do you know about feminism, Wayne? 303 00:11:04,533 --> 00:11:06,800 I know it's unsafe territory to discuss with a feminist. 304 00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:08,433 ‐Why? ‐Someone will start shoutin'. 305 00:11:08,466 --> 00:11:10,300 ‐Why? ‐I don't know. 306 00:11:10,333 --> 00:11:12,433 Feminism is the belief that women and men 307 00:11:12,466 --> 00:11:14,733 should have equal rights and opportunities. 308 00:11:14,766 --> 00:11:16,600 So, are you a feminist, Wayne? 309 00:11:16,633 --> 00:11:18,233 Well, I trust my sister 310 00:11:18,266 --> 00:11:20,800 with just about any job under the sun over a man. 311 00:11:20,833 --> 00:11:22,700 ‐But 'cept this one, I guess. ‐Excuse me? 312 00:11:22,733 --> 00:11:25,266 Not to be impolite but you're not exposed to talk about sex, 313 00:11:25,300 --> 00:11:27,733 politics or religion at the supper table. 314 00:11:27,766 --> 00:11:30,200 (SIGHING) What do you want, Wayne? 315 00:11:30,233 --> 00:11:32,800 ‐I'd have a Gus'n Bru, likely. ‐Not what I'm asking. 316 00:11:32,833 --> 00:11:34,566 What's a Gus'n Bru? 317 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:36,433 Ooh! I'll google it and find out. 318 00:11:36,466 --> 00:11:38,166 I'm kiddin'. I know exactly what it is. 319 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:39,600 But we don't have any. 320 00:11:39,633 --> 00:11:40,800 So, what can I get you to drink? 321 00:11:40,833 --> 00:11:43,100 I'll have a Caesar and he'll have a... 322 00:11:43,133 --> 00:11:44,466 Pint of lager, please. Something local. 323 00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:45,733 ‐Thank you. ‐GLEN: All right. 324 00:11:45,766 --> 00:11:47,766 So, a local lager for Mr. Brando 325 00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,566 and a Caesar for Sandy Bullock. 326 00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:51,433 I love those orders. Be right back. 327 00:11:52,700 --> 00:11:54,600 I didn't think they'd have it at Four Dancers. 328 00:11:54,633 --> 00:11:57,333 Yes, I didn't think they'd have it at this resto‐bar. 329 00:11:57,366 --> 00:11:59,600 ‐Gastro‐pub. ‐Says "resto‐bar" on the sign. 330 00:11:59,633 --> 00:12:01,200 It's more of a micro‐bistro. 331 00:12:01,233 --> 00:12:03,333 Says brasserie on the menu right there, too. 332 00:12:03,366 --> 00:12:05,166 It's more of a bistro‐brasserie. 333 00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:06,600 When I came in they asked me if I wanted 334 00:12:06,633 --> 00:12:08,500 to sit at the resto‐bar or the gastro‐lounge. 335 00:12:08,533 --> 00:12:10,066 I'm glad you chose the resto‐bar. 336 00:12:10,100 --> 00:12:11,566 This is actually the gastro‐lounge. 337 00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:16,733 Do you know what an emergency call is, Wayne? 338 00:12:16,766 --> 00:12:18,766 ‐Negative. ‐It's when you have a friend 339 00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:21,533 call 10, 15 minutes into a date 340 00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:23,366 to be sure the date isn't a total bust. 341 00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:26,066 And if it is, then you can play the phone call 342 00:12:26,100 --> 00:12:28,166 as though it's an emergency and leave the date. 343 00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:29,500 Well, that's fair. 344 00:12:29,533 --> 00:12:30,766 I guess we are first cousin to an emergency here. 345 00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:32,200 A good one. 346 00:12:32,233 --> 00:12:34,066 And you shouldn't be afraid of it. 347 00:12:34,100 --> 00:12:36,000 I think we could do good things here. 348 00:12:36,766 --> 00:12:39,033 I'm going to call my friend 349 00:12:39,066 --> 00:12:41,500 and cancel her pending emergency call, 350 00:12:41,533 --> 00:12:43,466 and when I get back, 351 00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:45,666 let's talk about your feelings, Wayne. 352 00:12:45,700 --> 00:12:49,066 ‐Okay. ‐Let's really talk about them. 353 00:12:49,100 --> 00:12:51,233 ‐Okay. ‐I wanna take 'em, 354 00:12:51,266 --> 00:12:53,000 and I wanna talk about them. 355 00:13:10,466 --> 00:13:12,233 Oh, it's Wayne. How are you now? 356 00:13:12,766 --> 00:13:14,100 Oh, not so bad. 357 00:13:14,133 --> 00:13:16,000 Yeah, this one's too hard. 358 00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:22,480 (TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING) 359 00:13:22,513 --> 00:13:24,947 We don't have time to discuss that business. 360 00:13:28,813 --> 00:13:29,813 Devon. 361 00:13:33,913 --> 00:13:35,780 Stewart. 362 00:13:35,813 --> 00:13:38,180 I come in peace. 363 00:13:38,213 --> 00:13:39,480 How do we know you don't have another one 364 00:13:39,513 --> 00:13:40,547 of those in your sock? 365 00:13:40,580 --> 00:13:41,813 You don't. 366 00:13:44,213 --> 00:13:46,247 Speak. Do not approach. 367 00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:48,913 ‐Seen Katy around? ‐No. 368 00:13:48,947 --> 00:13:51,047 ‐That is all. ‐(GROWLING) Stewart! 369 00:13:53,547 --> 00:13:55,180 Trouble in paradise? 370 00:13:55,213 --> 00:13:57,313 If there was, she wouldn't know it. 371 00:13:57,347 --> 00:13:58,880 I'm not talking to her. 372 00:13:58,913 --> 00:14:00,780 Well played. Wait it out. 373 00:14:00,813 --> 00:14:02,013 That way she'll come to the conclusion that 374 00:14:02,047 --> 00:14:03,413 you're upset with her and ask you why. 375 00:14:03,447 --> 00:14:05,513 ‐Precisely. ‐She should anyway. 376 00:14:05,547 --> 00:14:07,180 ‐If she's smart. ‐I know. 377 00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:09,180 ‐Why are you mad at her? ‐She acts like... 378 00:14:09,213 --> 00:14:10,347 You should try an open relationship. 379 00:14:11,347 --> 00:14:12,547 Could be productive. 380 00:14:12,580 --> 00:14:13,780 You could also try a hall pass. 381 00:14:13,813 --> 00:14:14,680 It's when you give, you know, 382 00:14:14,713 --> 00:14:16,080 her being allowed to sleep with one person 383 00:14:16,113 --> 00:14:18,113 and that's it, no questions asked. 384 00:14:18,147 --> 00:14:19,547 Another plausibly fruitful option. 385 00:14:19,580 --> 00:14:21,513 New GTA and COD out today. 386 00:14:21,547 --> 00:14:23,313 We're going to sesh. 387 00:14:23,347 --> 00:14:25,080 ‐Been gaming much? ‐Always gaming. 388 00:14:26,013 --> 00:14:27,313 ‐You? ‐Just gamed. 389 00:14:27,347 --> 00:14:29,247 Stimulating morning game. 390 00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:30,447 Evening game will eclipse. 391 00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:31,847 I gamed a 4:00‐to‐4:00 shift last night. 392 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:33,013 You're gaming taxi driver's hours? 393 00:14:33,047 --> 00:14:34,280 I gamed a 10:00‐to‐4:00 shift today. 394 00:14:34,313 --> 00:14:35,847 Gaming banker's hours. 395 00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:37,913 I'll probably game a 5:00‐to‐7:00 shift now. 396 00:14:37,947 --> 00:14:39,947 Cinq a sept. Nous aussi. 397 00:14:40,980 --> 00:14:42,413 You guys wanna hit up a happy hour? 398 00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:47,480 We're gonna hit another happy hour. 399 00:14:52,813 --> 00:14:53,947 (MUSIC PLAYING) 400 00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:57,180 Heads up! 401 00:14:57,213 --> 00:14:58,813 ‐STEWART: Ow! ‐(CAR HORN BLARING) 402 00:15:16,980 --> 00:15:18,080 I'm Lisa. 403 00:15:19,413 --> 00:15:20,413 Wayne. 404 00:15:24,947 --> 00:15:26,547 GLEN: Wayne! 405 00:15:26,580 --> 00:15:28,447 ‐Glen, how are you now? ‐Good and you? 406 00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:30,313 ‐Not so bad. ‐Well, I guess the teddy's 407 00:15:30,347 --> 00:15:31,913 out of the tickle trunk on this one, too. 408 00:15:31,947 --> 00:15:33,847 I also work here. 409 00:15:33,880 --> 00:15:36,547 Reason is the Salty Treat blew out an amp the other day, 410 00:15:36,580 --> 00:15:38,947 rockin' out pretty hard to some Lifehouse covers, 411 00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:39,980 which will happen. 412 00:15:40,013 --> 00:15:41,347 So, I'm pickin' up the slack. I'm happy to do it. 413 00:15:41,380 --> 00:15:42,847 Way she goes. 414 00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:44,180 I'm Lisa. 415 00:15:44,213 --> 00:15:46,047 Are you ever. Look at you! 416 00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:47,880 It's America's little sweetheart over here. 417 00:15:47,913 --> 00:15:49,147 You're like a little Katy Heigl 418 00:15:49,180 --> 00:15:51,347 or like a little Katy Hudson. 419 00:15:51,380 --> 00:15:52,513 What can I get ya? 420 00:15:52,547 --> 00:15:53,947 Do you have cookies and cream? 421 00:15:53,980 --> 00:15:55,047 Do I... (LAUGHS) 422 00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:56,247 Do I have cookies and cream? 423 00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:58,047 I sure do have cookies and cream. 424 00:15:58,080 --> 00:16:01,913 (SIGHS) And I'm thinkin' maybe a vanilla‐fudge swirl chunk 425 00:16:01,947 --> 00:16:03,247 for Mr. Newman over here? 426 00:16:03,280 --> 00:16:04,847 ‐That'll do, thank you. ‐Okay. 427 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,547 And you're gonna keep an eye on little Caty Blanchett here 428 00:16:06,580 --> 00:16:07,813 ‐for me till I get back? ‐Sure will. 429 00:16:07,847 --> 00:16:09,280 Thank you! Be right back! 430 00:16:11,213 --> 00:16:13,847 ‐So, you're a farmer, Wayne? ‐Can confirm. 431 00:16:13,880 --> 00:16:15,080 You don't smell like one. 432 00:16:15,113 --> 00:16:17,380 (CHUCKLES) I'm kidding. 433 00:16:17,413 --> 00:16:19,380 I'm a pre‐school principal. Do you like kids? 434 00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:21,447 ‐Hmm... ‐I know, everyone likes kids. 435 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:22,780 They're so silly. 436 00:16:22,813 --> 00:16:24,347 I love them when they're silly. 437 00:16:24,380 --> 00:16:27,813 But if they get too silly, they have to come see me. 438 00:16:27,847 --> 00:16:28,913 ‐"Silly"? ‐Mischief. 439 00:16:28,947 --> 00:16:30,813 ‐Trouble. ‐We use gentler terms. 440 00:16:30,847 --> 00:16:31,780 As a policy. 441 00:16:31,813 --> 00:16:33,780 Well, so what happens when they come see you? 442 00:16:33,813 --> 00:16:36,480 Well, we do things a little differently in our program. 443 00:16:36,513 --> 00:16:39,113 The approach is progressive and positive. 444 00:16:39,147 --> 00:16:41,047 We issue a hug consent form to parents, 445 00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:42,513 which allows us to hug their kids. 446 00:16:42,547 --> 00:16:46,847 Because 99% of the time, all kids need is a hug. 447 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:47,913 ‐"A hug"? ‐A squeeze. 448 00:16:47,947 --> 00:16:48,980 Well, you squeeze 'em. 449 00:16:49,013 --> 00:16:50,180 ‐An embrace. ‐Oh. 450 00:16:50,213 --> 00:16:51,813 ‐Oh? ‐Well... 451 00:16:51,847 --> 00:16:53,047 ‐What is it? ‐Nothin'. 452 00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:54,280 ‐Wayne. ‐Yeah? 453 00:16:54,313 --> 00:16:56,313 ‐Speak freely. ‐No, I'd better not. 454 00:16:56,347 --> 00:16:58,880 That's the only way we'll get to know each other. 455 00:16:58,913 --> 00:17:00,313 But do you ever smack 'em? 456 00:17:00,347 --> 00:17:02,513 ‐Excuse me? ‐Like, give 'em a good whack? 457 00:17:02,547 --> 00:17:05,447 ‐I don't follow. ‐Do you ever hit the kid? 458 00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:07,313 Like, for being too silly. 459 00:17:07,347 --> 00:17:09,213 No! Wayne. 460 00:17:09,247 --> 00:17:11,913 We never hit our kids. You shouldn't hit kids. 461 00:17:11,947 --> 00:17:13,080 Well, you know what, 462 00:17:13,113 --> 00:17:14,513 don't you remember how scared you were 463 00:17:14,547 --> 00:17:16,180 of your principal when you were growing up? 464 00:17:16,213 --> 00:17:17,447 It's 'cause he'd smack you if you were being too silly. 465 00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:18,880 Like your parents wanted you 466 00:17:18,913 --> 00:17:20,213 to have a principal who would smack you. 467 00:17:20,247 --> 00:17:21,813 They took comfort in the fact 468 00:17:21,847 --> 00:17:23,047 that they were sending you to a place every day 469 00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:24,847 where someone would smack you for them 470 00:17:24,880 --> 00:17:26,047 if you were being too silly. 471 00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:27,313 And sometimes I see kids these days, 472 00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:28,347 I kind of think, like... 473 00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,280 Like, wish you could still do that. 474 00:17:31,313 --> 00:17:33,513 That sort of discipline is long outdated, Wayne, 475 00:17:33,547 --> 00:17:34,980 and frowned upon. 476 00:17:35,013 --> 00:17:36,047 We sit the child down... 477 00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:37,813 ‐That's another problem. ‐What is? 478 00:17:37,847 --> 00:17:39,380 ‐In my opinion. ‐Sitting? 479 00:17:39,413 --> 00:17:41,147 Well, no wonder kids are failin' school, 480 00:17:41,180 --> 00:17:42,413 just sittin' around all day. 481 00:17:42,447 --> 00:17:44,013 Stand up, you're not doing nothin'. 482 00:17:44,047 --> 00:17:45,313 You think sitting is a problem? 483 00:17:45,347 --> 00:17:46,780 ‐Yeah. ‐Why? 484 00:17:46,813 --> 00:17:48,147 'Cause it makes you soft. 485 00:17:48,180 --> 00:17:51,147 ‐Literally or figuratively? ‐Well, both, I suppose. 486 00:17:51,180 --> 00:17:52,913 ‐Both? ‐Yeah. 487 00:17:52,947 --> 00:17:54,280 In my opinion. 488 00:17:54,313 --> 00:17:55,413 My phone's buzzing. 489 00:17:57,913 --> 00:17:59,947 Well, so you like cookies and cream ice cream, hey? 490 00:17:59,980 --> 00:18:01,147 Well, I think it's pretty good, too. 491 00:18:01,180 --> 00:18:02,347 Hi, Michelle. 492 00:18:02,913 --> 00:18:04,147 Oh, no. 493 00:18:04,180 --> 00:18:06,380 Okay, I'll be right there. 494 00:18:06,413 --> 00:18:08,113 I'm sorry, Wayne, I've gotta go. 495 00:18:08,147 --> 00:18:09,947 ‐It's... ‐An emergency. 496 00:18:09,980 --> 00:18:11,180 ‐Yeah. ‐Okay. 497 00:18:23,547 --> 00:18:25,180 It's Wayne. 498 00:18:25,213 --> 00:18:26,780 Well, how are you now? 499 00:18:26,813 --> 00:18:28,180 Oh, not so bad. 500 00:18:28,213 --> 00:18:29,947 Yeah, this one's too soft. 501 00:18:31,947 --> 00:18:33,147 (SCOFFING) 502 00:18:38,813 --> 00:18:40,413 (SIGHING) 503 00:18:45,813 --> 00:18:47,280 (SIGHING CONTINUES) 504 00:18:48,547 --> 00:18:50,147 (GROANING) 505 00:18:58,180 --> 00:18:59,947 (SIGHING) 506 00:19:04,147 --> 00:19:05,380 What? 507 00:19:05,413 --> 00:19:06,780 (SCOFFS) 508 00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:08,147 I'm not talking to you. 509 00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:09,280 Super. 510 00:19:10,447 --> 00:19:12,147 ‐(SIGHS) ‐It's been three days. 511 00:19:12,180 --> 00:19:13,847 Why haven't you asked me what's wrong? 512 00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:16,213 ‐Something wrong? ‐Of course it is. 513 00:19:16,247 --> 00:19:18,780 ‐You act like I don't... ‐Should I have known that? 514 00:19:18,813 --> 00:19:20,447 It's called "the silent treatment." 515 00:19:20,480 --> 00:19:22,313 Step one, I stop talking to you. 516 00:19:22,347 --> 00:19:23,913 Step two, you form the conclusion 517 00:19:23,947 --> 00:19:25,047 that something is wrong. 518 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:27,413 Step three, you ask me what's wrong. 519 00:19:27,447 --> 00:19:28,813 What's up with step one? 520 00:19:28,847 --> 00:19:30,047 You've skipped step one and two. 521 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:31,780 What's step three again? 522 00:19:31,813 --> 00:19:33,880 You ask me what's wrong! 523 00:19:33,913 --> 00:19:34,913 Got it. 524 00:19:35,513 --> 00:19:36,847 Good. 525 00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:37,880 You bet. 526 00:19:39,913 --> 00:19:40,980 Go ahead. 527 00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:42,947 Where? 528 00:19:42,980 --> 00:19:44,913 ‐Step three. ‐What's step three again? 529 00:19:44,947 --> 00:19:46,313 (EXHALES) 530 00:19:46,347 --> 00:19:48,147 We'll skip step three. 531 00:19:48,180 --> 00:19:49,880 I'm just going to tell you what's wrong. 532 00:19:49,913 --> 00:19:51,213 That should have been step one. 533 00:19:51,247 --> 00:19:53,880 Wrong. Step one and two are fundamental steps. 534 00:19:53,913 --> 00:19:56,113 You missed steps, Stewart. 535 00:19:56,147 --> 00:19:57,513 How? 536 00:19:57,547 --> 00:20:00,080 Step one, become angry with someone. 537 00:20:00,113 --> 00:20:03,180 Step two, tell that someone that you're angry. 538 00:20:03,213 --> 00:20:05,913 Step three, resolve anger with that someone. 539 00:20:05,947 --> 00:20:07,547 ‐Step four... ‐(SCOFFING) Step four. 540 00:20:07,580 --> 00:20:10,813 Step four, resume peaceful existence. 541 00:20:13,947 --> 00:20:16,947 Your logic is frighteningly bewitching. 542 00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:19,447 Phantasmagoric. 543 00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:21,080 It's time for you to go. 544 00:20:22,413 --> 00:20:23,413 What? 545 00:20:24,180 --> 00:20:25,380 Where? 546 00:20:25,413 --> 00:20:26,413 Leave here? 547 00:20:27,247 --> 00:20:28,780 It was a rebound. 548 00:20:28,813 --> 00:20:30,880 Even though there was no physical act of rebounding, 549 00:20:30,913 --> 00:20:32,280 which is a first for me. 550 00:20:32,313 --> 00:20:33,447 (SCOFFS) Gross. 551 00:20:35,480 --> 00:20:36,913 Seriously, Katy. 552 00:20:38,047 --> 00:20:39,047 W5. 553 00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:42,213 No one has time for the silent treatment, Stewart. 554 00:20:42,247 --> 00:20:43,947 Not even in Letterkenny. 555 00:20:43,980 --> 00:20:45,147 Adios. 556 00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:55,847 (MUSIC PLAYING) 557 00:20:59,847 --> 00:21:01,113 ‐DAN: Heads up! ‐(LAUGHS) 558 00:21:01,147 --> 00:21:02,880 Nice try, shirt‐tuckers! 559 00:21:04,347 --> 00:21:05,413 (DARYL SNICKERS) 560 00:21:07,413 --> 00:21:09,047 Ow! 561 00:21:09,080 --> 00:21:10,813 (WAILING) 562 00:21:18,813 --> 00:21:20,213 (MUSIC PLAYING) 563 00:21:45,180 --> 00:21:46,347 Hi, Wayne. 564 00:21:47,213 --> 00:21:48,347 Angie. 565 00:21:50,580 --> 00:21:51,780 Wayne! 566 00:21:53,413 --> 00:21:56,180 Oh, my gourd, what a coincidence. 567 00:21:56,213 --> 00:21:58,047 Oh, I bet you're thinkin' I work here. 568 00:21:58,080 --> 00:21:59,113 I don't work here. 569 00:21:59,147 --> 00:22:00,780 I just love Guy's fries. 570 00:22:00,813 --> 00:22:02,780 They're so crispy, and you add a little salt... 571 00:22:02,813 --> 00:22:04,213 (LAUGHS) I just think they're so delicious. 572 00:22:05,247 --> 00:22:07,447 Ooh! Who is this? 573 00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:09,113 You're a masterpiece, aren't ya? 574 00:22:09,147 --> 00:22:12,413 You're like a Shelly Pfeiffer, you're like a Charlie Theron, 575 00:22:12,447 --> 00:22:13,947 or like a Penny Cruz. 576 00:22:13,980 --> 00:22:15,047 Ooh! 577 00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:16,247 You're like a little Angie Jolie. 578 00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:18,080 That's who you are, you're Angie. 579 00:22:18,113 --> 00:22:19,347 How are you now? 580 00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:21,780 ‐Good and you? ‐Not so bad. 581 00:22:21,813 --> 00:22:22,980 Can we talk? 582 00:22:23,013 --> 00:22:24,313 ‐Okay. ‐"Talk." 583 00:22:26,147 --> 00:22:27,180 In your truck. 584 00:22:30,347 --> 00:22:31,347 Okay. 585 00:22:33,147 --> 00:22:34,947 Now that was just right. 586 00:22:35,547 --> 00:22:37,313 (EXHALES) 587 00:22:37,347 --> 00:22:39,413 So how did you make out, super chief? 588 00:22:39,447 --> 00:22:41,013 Did you find the missing Goldi‐link? 589 00:22:41,047 --> 00:22:42,347 You fallin' in Goldi‐love? 590 00:22:42,380 --> 00:22:43,413 It's better to Goldi‐let this go, 591 00:22:43,447 --> 00:22:44,880 before I Goldi‐lose my shit. 592 00:22:44,913 --> 00:22:46,847 Oh, take your drink, you Goldi‐lush. 593 00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:48,080 Tread Goldi‐lightly. 594 00:22:49,447 --> 00:22:50,913 So, that's no toe‐curlin' then? 595 00:22:50,947 --> 00:22:52,280 It's impolite to kiss and tell. 596 00:22:52,313 --> 00:22:53,947 Nothin' wrong with a little stank on the hang down. 597 00:22:53,980 --> 00:22:55,480 Nothin' wrong with a little takesin' out in the trades. 598 00:22:55,513 --> 00:22:57,080 A little hizzin' in the skizzins. 599 00:22:57,113 --> 00:22:58,213 No, I know there's nothin' wrong with a little 600 00:22:58,247 --> 00:22:59,447 goin' to the bone yard, I know that. 601 00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:01,047 Nothin' wrong with a little bacon makin'. 602 00:23:01,080 --> 00:23:02,780 Nothin' wrong with a little shot twixt winds and waters. 603 00:23:02,813 --> 00:23:04,413 A little building the blanket monster. 604 00:23:04,447 --> 00:23:06,180 I know there's nothin' wrong with a little pituitary poke. 605 00:23:06,213 --> 00:23:07,813 ‐I know that. ‐Nothin' wrong with a little 606 00:23:07,847 --> 00:23:09,313 makin' the beast with two backs. 607 00:23:09,347 --> 00:23:11,047 Makin' feet for children's stockin's. 608 00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:12,080 Testing the tube steak. 609 00:23:12,113 --> 00:23:13,280 Look, I know there's nothin' wrong 610 00:23:13,313 --> 00:23:14,480 with a little crawl up the skin slide. 611 00:23:14,513 --> 00:23:16,447 ‐I know that. ‐Nothin' wrong with a little, 612 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:19,547 "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" 613 00:23:19,580 --> 00:23:21,180 Now just pump the brakes right there. 614 00:23:21,213 --> 00:23:22,913 ‐I got a question. ‐Have at 'er. 615 00:23:22,947 --> 00:23:24,047 Then I got a comment. 616 00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:25,047 Well, let's hear it, good buddy. 617 00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:26,280 Now, my question. 618 00:23:26,313 --> 00:23:27,413 When have you ever heard a girl go, 619 00:23:27,447 --> 00:23:28,913 "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes." 620 00:23:28,947 --> 00:23:31,013 ‐Well... ‐Other than in a porno. 621 00:23:32,213 --> 00:23:33,780 ‐I don't believe I have. ‐Me neithers. 622 00:23:33,813 --> 00:23:35,347 That's because we don't say that. 623 00:23:35,380 --> 00:23:37,247 ‐Well... ‐Not unless it's in a porno. 624 00:23:37,280 --> 00:23:38,413 WAYNE: Now my comment. 625 00:23:38,447 --> 00:23:40,380 You see, the way Dary did the "yes, yes, yes, yes, yes's" 626 00:23:40,413 --> 00:23:42,813 is not the way they do the "yes, yes, yes" in pornos. 627 00:23:42,847 --> 00:23:44,147 That's the way they do it. 628 00:23:44,180 --> 00:23:46,047 The girl gets all excited, and she goes, 629 00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:49,347 "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes." 630 00:23:49,380 --> 00:23:51,213 Yes, but the way you're doing the "yes, yes, yes, yes's" 631 00:23:51,247 --> 00:23:53,013 is not the way they do the "yes, yes, yes, yes, yes." 632 00:23:53,047 --> 00:23:54,813 DARYL: It is the way they do it. 633 00:23:54,847 --> 00:23:57,147 They go, "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes." 634 00:23:57,180 --> 00:23:58,180 That's exactly how they do it. 635 00:23:58,213 --> 00:23:59,447 WAYNE: No, they don't. 636 00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:00,413 What they do is they find a super‐high pitch 637 00:24:00,447 --> 00:24:01,913 for those first four yes's. 638 00:24:01,947 --> 00:24:02,780 And then they come in all dramatic 639 00:24:02,813 --> 00:24:03,947 for that final "yes." 640 00:24:03,980 --> 00:24:05,447 So, it goes a little something like, "Yes, yes, yes, yes." 641 00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:06,480 And then they get all dramatic 642 00:24:06,513 --> 00:24:07,547 for that final "yes." 643 00:24:07,580 --> 00:24:09,447 Say, "Yes! Oh." 644 00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:10,880 I don't think that's how they do it. 645 00:24:10,913 --> 00:24:12,047 I'd have to hears it again. 646 00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:14,913 "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" 647 00:24:14,947 --> 00:24:16,880 Yeah. Yeah, porno girls do that. 648 00:24:16,913 --> 00:24:18,080 But only when the porno guys 649 00:24:18,113 --> 00:24:20,313 aren't busy finding some super‐low tone 650 00:24:20,347 --> 00:24:22,347 and repeating over and over again, 651 00:24:22,380 --> 00:24:23,947 "Ah, fuck. 652 00:24:23,980 --> 00:24:25,780 "Ah, fuck." 653 00:24:25,813 --> 00:24:27,480 I takes a bit offense to that, Miss Katy, 654 00:24:27,513 --> 00:24:29,180 as I have a naturally low voice, 655 00:24:29,213 --> 00:24:31,347 and I do likes to say, "Ah, fuck. 656 00:24:31,380 --> 00:24:32,780 "Ah, fuck." 657 00:24:32,813 --> 00:24:34,080 Exceptin' I don't do it in pornos. 658 00:24:34,113 --> 00:24:35,413 Well, then you should do voiceovers 659 00:24:35,447 --> 00:24:37,047 for English‐dubbed foreign pornos, Dan, 660 00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:40,247 because that was a text book "ah, fuck, ah, fuck." 661 00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:41,380 Why thank you, Miss Katy. 662 00:24:41,413 --> 00:24:42,447 I've never had any complaints from 663 00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:43,880 any of my sexual companions 664 00:24:43,913 --> 00:24:46,813 about my "ah, fuck, ah, fuck." 665 00:24:48,213 --> 00:24:49,447 KATY: Let me hear yours, Dary. 666 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:51,013 Well, I... I'm confused still on the 667 00:24:51,047 --> 00:24:53,147 "yes, yes, yes, yes, yes's." 668 00:24:53,180 --> 00:24:55,913 So, Wayne, it's like, uh, 669 00:24:55,947 --> 00:24:58,447 "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes"? 670 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:00,447 See, it's not as if it's a fuckin' question, Dary, is it? 671 00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:02,080 You're saying it like it's a question. 672 00:25:02,113 --> 00:25:06,447 So, it's like, "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes." 673 00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:07,980 You're gettin closer, Dary, but what you want to do 674 00:25:08,013 --> 00:25:09,080 is put a little pepper on the end of it. 675 00:25:09,113 --> 00:25:10,413 You just want to put a little pepper on the end of it. 676 00:25:10,447 --> 00:25:12,013 Like, "Yes!" 677 00:25:13,247 --> 00:25:14,547 "Yes!" 678 00:25:14,580 --> 00:25:15,880 "Ah, fuck." 679 00:25:15,913 --> 00:25:17,447 ‐It's like, "Yes, yes, yes..." ‐"Ah, fuck." 680 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:19,280 ‐"...yes, yes, yes!" ‐"Ah, fuck." 681 00:25:19,313 --> 00:25:21,813 Like, "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" 682 00:25:21,847 --> 00:25:22,913 "Yes!" 683 00:25:22,947 --> 00:25:24,180 Just having a fight with my hat. 684 00:25:24,213 --> 00:25:25,913 ‐(ALL MOANING) ‐"Oh, my God." 685 00:25:25,947 --> 00:25:27,880 (GRUNTING) 686 00:25:27,913 --> 00:25:29,213 (MOANING) 687 00:25:29,247 --> 00:25:31,213 "Oh, my God!" 688 00:25:31,247 --> 00:25:32,447 "Feels really good." 689 00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:35,313 "Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God." 690 00:25:35,347 --> 00:25:38,880 (ALL MOANING) 691 00:25:38,913 --> 00:25:40,313 "Oh, my God! 692 00:25:40,347 --> 00:25:42,080 "Oh, my God! 693 00:25:42,113 --> 00:25:43,813 "Oh, my God!" 694 00:25:45,347 --> 00:25:46,980 Three praccys a week, buddy? 695 00:25:47,013 --> 00:25:49,313 Three praccys a week in Senior‐A whale shit, buddy. 696 00:25:49,347 --> 00:25:51,980 Half these guys wheel their fuckin' bags into the rink. 697 00:25:52,620 --> 00:25:54,787 The day I fuckin' wheel my bag into the rink 698 00:25:54,820 --> 00:25:56,820 is the day I stop playing hockey. 699 00:25:56,854 --> 00:25:58,054 A‐fuckin'‐men, buddy. 700 00:25:58,087 --> 00:25:59,554 Why do we even praccy, buddy? 701 00:25:59,587 --> 00:26:01,054 Should be rippin' sandos. 702 00:26:01,087 --> 00:26:02,787 See me toss the sauce in the skates 703 00:26:02,820 --> 00:26:04,820 ‐all night long, buddy? ‐Just tossin' rocket sauce 704 00:26:04,854 --> 00:26:06,420 straight into the blades, boys. 705 00:26:06,454 --> 00:26:09,154 I don't even know what a tape‐to‐taper is anymore. 706 00:26:09,187 --> 00:26:11,020 Not sure what a tape‐to‐taper is anymore, buddy. 707 00:26:11,054 --> 00:26:13,554 ‐Fuck tape‐to‐tapers, buddy. ‐Fuck tapers. 708 00:26:13,587 --> 00:26:14,787 I fired a point‐blank clap bomb 709 00:26:14,820 --> 00:26:16,487 directly into Barts's chest tonight. 710 00:26:16,520 --> 00:26:18,487 Fired a point‐blank point bomb straight in Yorkie's junk. 711 00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:21,387 I snowed our plug tendy no less than nine times. 712 00:26:21,420 --> 00:26:23,720 I snow‐showered our plug tendy and that was his own "D," man. 713 00:26:23,754 --> 00:26:24,920 (BOTH LAUGHING) 714 00:26:24,954 --> 00:26:27,054 Praccy's not badski when you're donkin'. 715 00:26:27,087 --> 00:26:28,687 I could donk all day, boys. 716 00:26:29,954 --> 00:26:31,620 (TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)