1
00:00:13,847 --> 00:00:16,558
‐ You wanna know what? I'm gettin'
a little bit sick of this set up.
2
00:00:16,558 --> 00:00:19,311
‐ When a friend asks for help,
you helps 'em, good buddies.
3
00:00:19,311 --> 00:00:21,104
‐ Yeah, but we've got people calling
4
00:00:21,104 --> 00:00:23,315
from a half dozen townships there,
Squirrelly D.
5
00:00:23,315 --> 00:00:25,150
‐ Yeah, like, we don't even know
half of these nut sacks.
6
00:00:25,150 --> 00:00:26,527
‐ You know, if I know you, Wayne,
7
00:00:26,527 --> 00:00:29,488
and I am 100% sure
I would like to get to know you better,
8
00:00:29,488 --> 00:00:31,448
you'd rather be at home
doing some toe curlin'
9
00:00:31,448 --> 00:00:32,950
with your little Anne Parillaud.
10
00:00:32,950 --> 00:00:36,578
‐ Butt‐fuckin' bucket‐load of things
I'd rather be doin', good buddy.
11
00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:37,663
‐ Game time.
‐ Ooh!
12
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:39,373
Car!
[giggles]
13
00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:41,375
'Cause that's wh‐‐
when they play hockey...
14
00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:43,544
Fine, game on.
15
00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:46,630
♪ rock music playing ♪
16
00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:56,181
Okay, let's Crack an Ag.
Three, two, [mouths] one.
17
00:00:56,181 --> 00:00:57,975
‐ Yeah, well, welcome to Crack an Ag.
18
00:00:57,975 --> 00:00:58,934
And bet you can't, so...
19
00:00:58,934 --> 00:01:00,352
‐ McMurray's on the line.
20
00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:01,395
‐ Fuck sakes.
21
00:01:01,395 --> 00:01:02,980
‐ He says it's an emergency.
22
00:01:02,980 --> 00:01:04,898
‐ So much for that blacklist.
Wait, am I still on that?
23
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:06,483
DARYL:
Man, McMurray's a piece of shit.
24
00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:07,526
‐ Should I let him through?
25
00:01:07,526 --> 00:01:10,195
‐ We kinda have to now, good buddies.
‐ Okay.
26
00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:12,739
‐ He says that he's here at the studio,
but the doors are locked.
27
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:15,742
‐ Oh! I can just go let him in myself. Oh.
28
00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,286
I'm coming, blacklist buddy!
29
00:01:17,286 --> 00:01:18,537
‐ Buck futter.
30
00:01:18,537 --> 00:01:19,955
‐ Eh, when a friend asks you for help...
31
00:01:19,955 --> 00:01:20,873
‐ Get off his dick, Dan.
32
00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:23,292
[panting]
33
00:01:23,292 --> 00:01:25,502
‐ Wayne.
‐ McMurray, how are you now?
34
00:01:25,502 --> 00:01:27,713
‐ Good and you. Not so bad.
Good and you. And I knew that you were.
35
00:01:27,713 --> 00:01:30,340
‐ Pitter‐patter.
‐ [panting]
36
00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:33,427
‐ I have some life‐altering
news for youse.
37
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:35,596
‐ Well, we've got about a half dozen
townships watching,
38
00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:36,722
so, hope it's not too personal.
39
00:01:36,722 --> 00:01:39,683
‐ Shh. I, McMurray,
40
00:01:39,683 --> 00:01:44,605
have a 5.15 inch penis.
41
00:01:46,273 --> 00:01:49,276
‐ What?
‐ I, McMurray, have a 5, point‐‐
42
00:01:49,276 --> 00:01:51,612
‐ We, we heard you.
43
00:01:51,612 --> 00:01:53,488
‐ Why is this news that
you are telling us?
44
00:01:53,488 --> 00:01:56,658
‐ Because, Big Hoss,
I've spent my entire life
45
00:01:56,658 --> 00:02:00,245
thinking that I had a 4.15 inch penis.
46
00:02:00,245 --> 00:02:02,581
‐ So, you're essentially
fuckin' with a Snickers bar.
47
00:02:02,581 --> 00:02:04,208
‐ Well, girth is the question mark.
What changed?
48
00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:06,084
Did I say that?
49
00:02:06,084 --> 00:02:07,961
‐ I was listening to Howard Stern
this morning and‐‐
50
00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:10,589
‐ See, that's another thing I miss doing
when we're here all the time, fuck.
51
00:02:10,589 --> 00:02:11,590
‐ Hit 'em with the Hein!
52
00:02:11,590 --> 00:02:14,218
‐ Hit 'em with the Hein. And I learnt
53
00:02:14,218 --> 00:02:17,221
that I have been
measuring my penis incorrectly
54
00:02:17,221 --> 00:02:19,681
since the time I first measured it
as an adolescent.
55
00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:21,225
‐ How did you fuck that up?
56
00:02:21,225 --> 00:02:24,061
‐ I'm glad you asked, Katy.
‐ Ugh.
57
00:02:24,061 --> 00:02:27,773
‐ I measure my penis every year,
once a year on Boxing Day.
58
00:02:27,773 --> 00:02:29,566
‐ Well, how come it's on Boxing Day?
59
00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:31,985
‐ Oh, because that's when
Mrs. McMurray's family leaves
60
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,529
after a week‐long stay for the holidays,
61
00:02:33,529 --> 00:02:34,905
giving us a chance to...
62
00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:37,074
Exchange gifts.
63
00:02:37,074 --> 00:02:38,408
‐ Holy fuck.
64
00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:40,827
‐ Now, I pray to the good Lord Jesus above
65
00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:43,622
every year at Christmas Eve
at midnight mass,
66
00:02:43,622 --> 00:02:46,208
"Please, Lord, let me wake up,
67
00:02:46,208 --> 00:02:47,292
"let this year be the year
68
00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:49,461
that I give Mrs. McMurray
a little something extra."
69
00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:50,796
‐ Fuckin' Catholics.
70
00:02:50,796 --> 00:02:53,674
‐ And yet, every year on Boxing Day,
71
00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:58,011
I pull the tape out and... 4.15 inches.
72
00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:00,430
‐ So, you're essentially
fuckin' with a three‐quarter Rolo.
73
00:03:00,430 --> 00:03:02,099
‐ Girth is still the question mark.
74
00:03:02,099 --> 00:03:04,351
Glen, you have no one
to blame but yourself now.
75
00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:07,437
‐ I've been measuring my penis wrong!
My entire life!
76
00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:09,147
‐ How did you manage to fluff that up?
77
00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:11,900
‐ As Mrs. McMurray goes
and gets her Christmas lingerie on,
78
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,486
I lie myself in bed and I get myself
good and hard.
79
00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:16,530
Not a little hard. Good and hard.
80
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,031
‐ So, fully torqued, then?
81
00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:19,908
‐ Full bars.
‐ Full Snickers bars.
82
00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:21,201
‐ Holy fuck.
83
00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:23,453
‐ I prop lil' Mac down like so,
84
00:03:23,453 --> 00:03:25,372
and I lay the tape
along top of him like so,
85
00:03:25,372 --> 00:03:26,582
so he's pointing outwards.
86
00:03:26,582 --> 00:03:29,543
‐ So, uh, ninety degrees, out like that?
87
00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:30,961
‐ Exactly, Dary.
88
00:03:30,961 --> 00:03:32,129
And then I take the tape
89
00:03:32,129 --> 00:03:34,882
and I press it firmly
against my pubic bone,
90
00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:36,675
and then I lay her down
on top of lil' Mac.
91
00:03:36,675 --> 00:03:40,179
‐ And?
‐ And 4.15 inches.
92
00:03:40,179 --> 00:03:42,389
‐ That's some balls,
advertising that there, bud.
93
00:03:43,015 --> 00:03:44,975
‐ Balls! Exactly.
94
00:03:44,975 --> 00:03:47,728
‐ What the actual fuck are you
talking about, McMurray?
95
00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:51,064
‐ I learnt on Stern today
that you are not "exposed" to measure
96
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:54,109
from your pubic bone to the tip
of your penis on the top side.
97
00:03:54,109 --> 00:03:57,404
You are, in fact, "exposed"
to measure from your balls
98
00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:59,573
to the tip of your penis
on the underside.
99
00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:01,992
‐ Are you sure?
‐ Well, you don't argue with Stern.
100
00:04:01,992 --> 00:04:04,870
‐ This, the correct mode of measurement,
101
00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:06,747
gives me one additional inch
102
00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:09,208
and, by clinical definition,
103
00:04:09,208 --> 00:04:12,920
a 100% average‐sized penis
104
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:18,091
at 5.15 inches!
105
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:22,095
‐ I don't think I've ever seen anyone
be so excited to be average.
106
00:04:22,095 --> 00:04:24,181
‐ I don't think that method
of measurement is accurate.
107
00:04:24,181 --> 00:04:25,349
WAYNE:
Well, if Stern said it...
108
00:04:25,349 --> 00:04:26,808
‐ He didn't say Stern says it.
109
00:04:26,808 --> 00:04:28,101
He says he heards it on Sterns.
110
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,354
‐ Hit 'em with the Hein!
111
00:04:30,354 --> 00:04:31,522
‐ I can Google it.
112
00:04:31,522 --> 00:04:33,649
‐ Let's open the phone lines for this.
113
00:04:33,649 --> 00:04:34,983
‐ Open the lines.
114
00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:38,195
‐ JD Williams from Wallace Township.
You're on.
115
00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:40,322
WILLIAMS: McMurray's a piece of shit.
‐ Huh?
116
00:04:40,322 --> 00:04:42,950
WILLIAMS:
What kind of kife measuring is that?
117
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:46,203
How do you keep a straight‐up
dime‐piece like Mrs. McMurray
118
00:04:46,203 --> 00:04:47,829
with that pedestrian effort?
119
00:04:47,829 --> 00:04:50,040
You're essentially
fuckin' her with a Twinkie.
120
00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,750
‐ [chuckles] Good one.
121
00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:54,419
‐ Girth would still be the question...
Oh, Glen!
122
00:04:54,419 --> 00:04:55,629
‐ Fuck you!
123
00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:59,633
‐ Uh, John Heinmiller from Elma township,
you're on.
124
00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:01,718
HEINMILLER:
Ha, why am I not surprised
125
00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:04,221
you can't even figure out
how to measure your own dick,
126
00:05:04,221 --> 00:05:05,597
you piece of shit.
127
00:05:05,597 --> 00:05:08,892
I am utterly baffled you got
a ring on Mrs. McMurray.
128
00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:11,812
You should be tried for
crimes against humanity.
129
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:13,021
‐ This is a fuckin' ambush.
130
00:05:13,021 --> 00:05:16,733
‐ Brent Zurbrigg from Howick township.
You're on.
131
00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,151
ZURBRIGG:
Holy fuck, McMurray.
132
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:21,947
Look at you shootin' high stakes snooker
with a number two pencil there, buddy.
133
00:05:21,947 --> 00:05:24,908
Why don't you go ahead and tell your wife
I rock eight inches in reality,
134
00:05:24,908 --> 00:05:27,327
and nine if I measure
in your bunk‐ass way.
135
00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:29,580
Holy fuck. It's my fuckin' heart.
136
00:05:29,580 --> 00:05:31,999
It just breaks for that
fuckin' masterpiece.
137
00:05:31,999 --> 00:05:35,502
‐ My wife is a very satisfied woman.
138
00:05:35,502 --> 00:05:39,840
‐ Gary Hoskins from Lucan Biddulph,
you're on.
139
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:43,177
HOSKINS: Your wife is
blow‐my‐brains‐out hot, McMurray.
140
00:05:43,177 --> 00:05:46,263
I would literally cut off
my own arm to fuck her.
141
00:05:46,263 --> 00:05:51,143
I would 127 Hours both
my arms to fuck your wife.
142
00:05:51,143 --> 00:05:54,146
‐ How about I cut 'em both off
and stick 'em up your ass, you fuckin'‐‐
143
00:05:54,146 --> 00:05:57,024
‐ Sal Smith from Huron‐Kinloss. You're on.
144
00:05:57,024 --> 00:05:59,776
SMITH: Hey, I was sittin' here,
kinda sad for your wife
145
00:05:59,776 --> 00:06:01,528
'cause maybe she
doesn't know any better,
146
00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:03,447
but I'm roofing with my friend, Richard,
147
00:06:03,447 --> 00:06:05,073
who fucked her in high school
148
00:06:05,073 --> 00:06:06,700
and he's a fuckin' Dutchman, so...
149
00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,243
RICHARD:
Hey, ask her if she remembers
150
00:06:08,243 --> 00:06:09,661
Richard Van Den Berg, McMurray.
151
00:06:09,661 --> 00:06:12,039
I took her to semi‐formal in '03,
152
00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:14,416
and then took her down
in my dad's Oldsmobile.
153
00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:17,753
‐ Patricia Marie Shuli
from Georgian Bluffs. You're on.
154
00:06:17,753 --> 00:06:20,756
SHULI: I fucked McMurray at
a buck and doe in Drayton,
155
00:06:20,756 --> 00:06:23,967
and four inches is
a criminal embellishment.
156
00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:24,843
‐ Patti?
157
00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:26,720
SHULI:
McMurray, if you were ten off the tee,
158
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:30,057
I still wouldn't golf with you.
Fuckin' end it.
159
00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:33,519
‐ I think I might have a wee bit more time
for Crack an Ag.
160
00:06:33,519 --> 00:06:37,231
‐ Ronnie Schroeder from Woolwich.
You're on.
161
00:06:37,231 --> 00:06:40,150
SCHROEDER:
McMurray, get the fuck out of the way
162
00:06:40,150 --> 00:06:42,444
with that peasant cock,
you fuckin' novice.
163
00:06:42,444 --> 00:06:46,073
I would hand over one of my kids
to suck on those tits.
164
00:06:46,073 --> 00:06:47,950
I'll go long dick style
165
00:06:47,950 --> 00:06:50,285
with your wife all night long!
[yelps]
166
00:06:50,285 --> 00:06:51,245
‐ Ooh. Ooh.
167
00:06:51,245 --> 00:06:54,206
‐ It's an average‐sized penis.
168
00:06:54,957 --> 00:06:56,959
♪ theme music playing ♪
169
00:07:06,260 --> 00:07:07,719
‐ How much?
‐ Enough.
170
00:07:07,719 --> 00:07:08,595
‐ Your grandma died.
171
00:07:08,595 --> 00:07:10,138
‐ My Doda died.
‐ Your Doda passed
172
00:07:10,138 --> 00:07:12,140
and left you with enough
money to buy the Eagles?
173
00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:13,976
‐ Should I write it on
a fuckin' dry‐erase board, or‐‐
174
00:07:13,976 --> 00:07:15,978
‐ Why do you want to buy the team?
175
00:07:15,978 --> 00:07:17,771
‐ I have cousins coming up
in minor hockey,
176
00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:19,189
and they're starting to
get in trouble now.
177
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:20,357
They always used to watch your team,
178
00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:21,900
but now, they just
don't really give a shit.
179
00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:23,986
‐ And?
‐ And I want to use the money to create
180
00:07:23,986 --> 00:07:26,113
a more exciting
environment at the games,
181
00:07:26,113 --> 00:07:28,115
and keep them interested in hockey.
‐ Why?
182
00:07:28,115 --> 00:07:30,659
‐ 'Cause kids in sports
stay off the fucking streets.
183
00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:32,786
You fuckin' bug me, dude.
‐ No.
184
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:34,496
‐ No what?
185
00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:35,706
‐ You cannot buy the Eagles.
186
00:07:35,706 --> 00:07:37,165
‐ [scoffs]
I'll go over your head.
187
00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:39,084
‐ Will ya?
‐ Money talks, baby.
188
00:07:39,084 --> 00:07:40,752
‐ We're in first place.
‐ Are you?
189
00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:42,504
‐ So you can't go over my head.
‐ Why?
190
00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:44,214
‐ 'Cause W's talk, "baby."
191
00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:52,931
‐ If I put together a team,
will you play us?
192
00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:56,310
‐ If you put together a team,
will we play you?
193
00:07:56,310 --> 00:07:58,478
‐ Should I write that
on the dry‐erase board, too,
194
00:07:58,478 --> 00:07:59,938
you fuckin' basic?
195
00:07:59,938 --> 00:08:01,398
‐ We're mid‐season.
196
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,275
You want me to ice a first place team
197
00:08:03,275 --> 00:08:05,068
in a meaningless exhibition game,
198
00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:07,112
and risk my guys getting hurt
for the games that matter?
199
00:08:07,112 --> 00:08:09,865
‐ Do you want me to use the blue marker
or the black marker?
200
00:08:09,865 --> 00:08:11,283
The [inhales] red.
201
00:08:11,909 --> 00:08:14,203
‐ Why would I do that?
202
00:08:14,203 --> 00:08:16,997
‐ Because if I win,
you let me take over here.
203
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:19,041
‐ And if I win?
‐ I'll suck your dick.
204
00:08:21,627 --> 00:08:22,711
‐ Balls?
205
00:08:24,338 --> 00:08:25,339
Deal.
206
00:08:26,215 --> 00:08:27,758
‐ Auntie talks, baby.
207
00:08:28,717 --> 00:08:30,385
‐ We'll see about that, Auntie.
208
00:08:30,385 --> 00:08:33,096
♪
209
00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:36,058
‐ What's up, Auntie?
210
00:08:37,935 --> 00:08:39,520
‐ We're going to Letterkenny.
211
00:08:45,275 --> 00:08:46,360
What's up?
212
00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:47,569
‐ Solo spin class.
213
00:08:47,569 --> 00:08:49,738
Healthy body, healthy mind. I love it.
214
00:08:50,489 --> 00:08:53,951
Maximize every single...
215
00:08:53,951 --> 00:08:55,035
second.
216
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:55,994
‐ I need a coach.
217
00:08:56,411 --> 00:08:57,996
[yells, then laughs]
218
00:08:57,996 --> 00:08:59,289
[clattering]
219
00:08:59,289 --> 00:09:00,791
You got one.
‐ Fuckin' A.
220
00:09:00,791 --> 00:09:01,458
‐ For what?
221
00:09:04,503 --> 00:09:07,130
‐ We're resurrecting
the Letterkenny Irish.
222
00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:13,053
[music stops]
223
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:13,846
What?
224
00:09:15,013 --> 00:09:16,765
‐ That team is dog shit.
225
00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:21,144
We're resurrecting the Letterkenny Irish.
226
00:09:22,145 --> 00:09:23,897
I need my star players.
227
00:09:24,690 --> 00:09:27,526
Are you in?
BOTH: Yes!
228
00:09:27,526 --> 00:09:28,819
‐ All right.
229
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,321
The Letterkenny Irish are back.
230
00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:33,115
‐ Not yet. We're gonna need some finesse.
231
00:09:33,115 --> 00:09:34,825
‐ We'll find you holes.
‐ We'll get you deep.
232
00:09:34,825 --> 00:09:37,369
‐ We know a thing or two about bulging.
233
00:09:37,369 --> 00:09:38,453
Twine.
234
00:09:38,453 --> 00:09:40,247
‐ Daxi. Ronzy.
‐ Tanzy.
235
00:09:40,247 --> 00:09:41,415
‐ Never again.
‐ Got you.
236
00:09:41,415 --> 00:09:43,375
‐ All right, boys, you're in.
237
00:09:43,375 --> 00:09:45,586
Now we just need some sandpaper.
238
00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:48,839
[grunting]
239
00:09:48,839 --> 00:09:50,841
Tyson, Joint Boy, you got a sec?
240
00:09:50,841 --> 00:09:52,301
BOTH:
No.
241
00:09:53,343 --> 00:09:55,220
COACH:
Will these guys do?
242
00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:56,930
‐ These guys... I will do.
243
00:09:57,598 --> 00:09:59,266
‐ Okay.
244
00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:00,934
‐ So, the Letterkenny Irish are back.
245
00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:02,019
‐ Not yet.
246
00:10:02,019 --> 00:10:03,478
We got most of the pieces in place.
247
00:10:03,478 --> 00:10:05,981
But we only got one shot at this.
248
00:10:05,981 --> 00:10:08,442
One chance. One win. You know?
249
00:10:08,442 --> 00:10:11,987
Vomit on your mom's spaghetti,
or whatever that talking singer says.
250
00:10:11,987 --> 00:10:14,823
None of these guys
have won a championship.
251
00:10:14,823 --> 00:10:16,617
We gotta find some people
that know how to win.
252
00:10:17,326 --> 00:10:19,703
‐ Where do we find them?
‐ At the gym.
253
00:10:20,704 --> 00:10:22,956
‐ But we were just there!
254
00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:25,459
‐ They weren't there when we were there!
255
00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:27,211
‐ We were here the whole time.
256
00:10:27,211 --> 00:10:28,212
‐ Really?
257
00:10:28,212 --> 00:10:30,589
‐ And we're inski.
‐ Soda Popinski.
258
00:10:30,589 --> 00:10:32,132
‐ Can't wait to get back
out there, Betty‐Anne.
259
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,051
‐ Been far too long, Mary‐Anne.
‐ You won't be playing.
260
00:10:34,051 --> 00:10:35,052
‐ Huh?
‐ Huh?
261
00:10:35,052 --> 00:10:36,803
‐ Huh?
‐ You'll be coaching.
262
00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:37,846
‐ Huh?
‐ Huh?
263
00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:39,973
‐ Hold up. How come they can't they play?
264
00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:44,019
Just fuckin' around.
265
00:10:44,019 --> 00:10:46,355
‐ Same. Absolutely in
for telling men how to do shit.
266
00:10:46,355 --> 00:10:48,607
‐ Absolutely in for telling men
how to win shit.
267
00:10:49,024 --> 00:10:50,317
‐ Phew.
268
00:10:50,317 --> 00:10:52,361
I thought we were gonna have
one of those conversations,
269
00:10:52,361 --> 00:10:55,197
you know, where women
can do anything men can do.
270
00:10:55,197 --> 00:10:57,908
[laughs] So stupid.
271
00:10:59,326 --> 00:11:00,786
‐ That isn't a conversation.
272
00:11:00,786 --> 00:11:02,746
‐ Women can do anything men can do.
273
00:11:02,746 --> 00:11:03,705
‐ Women can do it better.
274
00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:05,207
‐ Eh... no.
275
00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:06,542
‐ No?
‐ No!
276
00:11:06,542 --> 00:11:08,043
‐ No?
‐ No.
277
00:11:08,043 --> 00:11:09,461
‐ No?
‐ No!
278
00:11:09,461 --> 00:11:10,420
‐ No?
‐ No.
279
00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:11,588
‐ No?
‐ No!
280
00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:13,173
‐ No?
‐ No.
281
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:14,925
‐ So, you're saying
men are superior to women?
282
00:11:14,925 --> 00:11:15,801
‐ Yeah!
‐ Yeah?
283
00:11:15,801 --> 00:11:17,135
‐ Yeah.
‐ Yeah?
284
00:11:17,135 --> 00:11:18,428
‐ Yeah!
‐ Yeah?
285
00:11:18,428 --> 00:11:19,429
‐ Yeah.
‐ Yeah?
286
00:11:19,429 --> 00:11:20,514
‐ Yeah!
‐ Yeah?
287
00:11:20,514 --> 00:11:22,015
‐ Yeah.
‐ Yeah?
288
00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:23,809
‐ Yeah.
‐ Explain.
289
00:11:25,185 --> 00:11:26,270
‐ Come on...
290
00:11:26,270 --> 00:11:27,896
‐ No, you come on.
291
00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:29,398
‐ Come on.
‐ You come on.
292
00:11:29,398 --> 00:11:30,649
‐ Come on!
‐ You come on.
293
00:11:30,649 --> 00:11:31,942
‐ Guys, come on.
294
00:11:31,942 --> 00:11:33,402
ALL:
You come on!
295
00:11:33,402 --> 00:11:35,571
‐ They're 120 pounds, soaking wet,
296
00:11:35,571 --> 00:11:37,906
full stomachs,
pockets full of loonies and toonies.
297
00:11:37,906 --> 00:11:41,243
‐ So?
‐ So, senior hockey players, men,
298
00:11:41,243 --> 00:11:43,620
are up to 220 pounds. More.
299
00:11:43,620 --> 00:11:46,373
‐ So?
‐ That's 100 pounds more!
300
00:11:46,373 --> 00:11:48,834
‐ So?
‐ So they could get killed out there.
301
00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:51,211
You will get killed out there.
302
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:53,005
You will die.
Think that's something to think about,
303
00:11:53,005 --> 00:11:54,381
I think, huh?
304
00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:56,008
Do you have good relationships
with your mom?
305
00:11:56,008 --> 00:11:56,884
‐ Yeah.
‐ No.
306
00:11:56,884 --> 00:11:58,760
‐ Well, better pick up a phone
and call her,
307
00:11:58,760 --> 00:11:59,845
'cause you're dead.
308
00:11:59,845 --> 00:12:01,471
'Cause you wanted to play a game
309
00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:04,683
with men who are bigger
and faster than you.
310
00:12:04,683 --> 00:12:06,351
‐ And faster?
‐ Yeah.
311
00:12:06,351 --> 00:12:07,394
‐ Yeah?
‐ Yeah.
312
00:12:07,394 --> 00:12:09,980
‐ Yeah?
‐ Yeah. Yeah!
313
00:12:10,939 --> 00:12:13,650
Look, I watch the Olympic games.
314
00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:15,527
All the events. All of 'em.
315
00:12:15,527 --> 00:12:19,615
Every single one. All right?
316
00:12:19,615 --> 00:12:22,201
And when the Olympic games are on,
all the events, every one,
317
00:12:22,201 --> 00:12:25,913
every single one,
318
00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:28,373
the men's speeds, results and times
319
00:12:28,373 --> 00:12:32,002
eclipse the women's speeds,
results and times
320
00:12:32,002 --> 00:12:33,420
every time.
‐ Play us.
321
00:12:33,420 --> 00:12:35,088
‐ In what?
‐ Hockey.
322
00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:36,798
‐ [scoffs]
Your team folded.
323
00:12:36,798 --> 00:12:38,175
‐ The girls are still around.
324
00:12:38,175 --> 00:12:39,384
‐ The girls would love this.
325
00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:41,512
‐ If you win, we'll coach with you.
326
00:12:41,512 --> 00:12:43,639
‐ You're playing them.
Get the boys gelling.
327
00:12:43,639 --> 00:12:45,641
I want to test drive an idea
I have for the Rez game.
328
00:12:45,641 --> 00:12:46,767
‐ Okay.
329
00:12:47,601 --> 00:12:48,727
‐ No contact.
330
00:12:48,727 --> 00:12:50,979
‐ [laughs] I know.
331
00:12:50,979 --> 00:12:52,606
‐ Don't want our guys
getting hurt out there.
332
00:12:52,606 --> 00:12:54,566
‐ Yeah, the guys.
333
00:12:54,566 --> 00:12:55,859
‐ All right, let's do this.
334
00:12:55,859 --> 00:12:56,777
‐ You're going down.
335
00:12:57,861 --> 00:13:00,030
‐ Oh, my God. I'm so scared.
336
00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:01,114
‐ Good.
337
00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:02,616
[laughs, then wheezes]
338
00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:05,994
‐ Your spines are gonna snap...
339
00:13:07,371 --> 00:13:10,749
[wheezes]
You're gonna have a feeding tube...
340
00:13:10,749 --> 00:13:12,292
[laughs, then wheezes]
341
00:13:15,587 --> 00:13:17,840
[groans mockingly]
342
00:13:19,508 --> 00:13:20,676
[laughs]
343
00:13:27,391 --> 00:13:30,102
BOTH:
Hello. Well...
344
00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:32,813
You go. No, you go.
345
00:13:32,813 --> 00:13:34,022
Okay, I'll go.
346
00:13:34,022 --> 00:13:36,316
‐ I'm back.
‐ That's what you are.
347
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:37,609
‐ But I have to go back to...
348
00:13:37,609 --> 00:13:38,569
‐ Vancouver, right?
349
00:13:38,569 --> 00:13:39,695
‐ Yeah, for...
350
00:13:39,695 --> 00:13:40,863
‐ Pit bull rescue still?
351
00:13:40,863 --> 00:13:43,407
‐ Yeah.
‐ You're a good fuckin' gal, Rosie.
352
00:13:44,366 --> 00:13:45,325
‐ I need a favor.
353
00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:47,703
‐ Oh.
354
00:13:47,703 --> 00:13:49,121
[whimpers]
355
00:13:50,372 --> 00:13:53,959
‐ Come here, bud.
Oh, who's a good boy?
356
00:13:55,544 --> 00:13:57,796
‐ Who is this?
357
00:13:57,796 --> 00:13:59,131
‐ That's Zeke.
358
00:13:59,131 --> 00:14:01,884
‐ Is he a Pit?
‐ Pits are banned in the province. I know.
359
00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:04,553
‐ What should be banned
is idiots breeding them,
360
00:14:04,553 --> 00:14:06,471
and then selling them to other idiots.
361
00:14:06,471 --> 00:14:07,806
‐ You're a good fuckin' guy, Wayne.
362
00:14:07,806 --> 00:14:09,266
‐ How'd you get him in?
363
00:14:09,266 --> 00:14:13,020
‐ There isn't a vet in the province
who backs breed‐specific legislation.
364
00:14:13,020 --> 00:14:15,230
They'll put anything on
his papers you ask 'em to.
365
00:14:15,230 --> 00:14:16,690
‐ So, if anyone asks, he's a...
366
00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:18,483
‐ Teacup Yorkie.
‐ Oh, is that what he is?
367
00:14:18,483 --> 00:14:21,028
‐ [chuckles] Kidding. American bulldog.
368
00:14:21,028 --> 00:14:22,404
‐ That's what he is.
369
00:14:22,404 --> 00:14:24,948
‐ I need you to hold onto him
for a couple days.
370
00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:27,284
‐ Okay.
371
00:14:27,284 --> 00:14:29,620
‐ His sister has been
lethargic since he left,
372
00:14:29,620 --> 00:14:30,829
so I'm going back for her.
373
00:14:30,829 --> 00:14:32,080
‐ And then what?
374
00:14:32,623 --> 00:14:33,624
‐ Then I'm back.
375
00:14:35,751 --> 00:14:37,336
I'll call you in a couple days.
376
00:14:37,336 --> 00:14:39,755
‐ Okay.
‐ Thank you.
377
00:14:47,763 --> 00:14:48,805
‐ All right. Hold up.
378
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:51,475
Especially youse two.
379
00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:54,520
Just stay like that for me. Mmm.
Okay.
380
00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:57,272
You guys are gonna need to get mic'd
before your sweaters go on.
381
00:14:57,272 --> 00:14:58,190
‐ Mic'd?
382
00:14:58,190 --> 00:14:59,858
[groans]
383
00:15:02,069 --> 00:15:03,487
[scraping on whiteboard]
384
00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:08,200
‐ Why?
‐ Just...
385
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,118
You, don't talk, okay?
It's just better for me.
386
00:15:10,118 --> 00:15:11,328
‐ Huh?
‐ Same for you.
387
00:15:12,454 --> 00:15:13,872
‐ Tanis?
‐ Huh.
388
00:15:13,872 --> 00:15:16,375
‐ Um, may we speak?
389
00:15:16,375 --> 00:15:17,918
‐ Sure.
390
00:15:17,918 --> 00:15:19,378
BOTH:
Why do we need mics?
391
00:15:19,378 --> 00:15:21,380
‐ All right, so you know
those videos on YouTube
392
00:15:21,380 --> 00:15:23,215
of all the NHL players
when they're all mic'd out?
393
00:15:23,215 --> 00:15:24,466
‐ You mean Mic'd Up?
394
00:15:24,466 --> 00:15:25,551
‐ Yeah, whatever.
395
00:15:25,551 --> 00:15:27,761
So, my cousins fucking love those videos
396
00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:30,138
and they watch them over
and over and over again.
397
00:15:30,138 --> 00:15:35,519
So, I want to provide for them
a pro‐level in‐game experience.
398
00:15:35,519 --> 00:15:40,315
So, for this afternoon's dress rehearsal,
youse are all gonna be mic'd out.
399
00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:42,401
‐ Mic'd up.
‐ Fuck you.
400
00:15:42,401 --> 00:15:43,610
‐ [feedback on radio]
‐ All right, Skids.
401
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:44,820
‐ Natives.
402
00:15:44,820 --> 00:15:46,780
TANIS:
Phasers set to stun up there, or what?
403
00:15:46,780 --> 00:15:48,365
‐ Uh, Stewart hasn't
picked a song yet, but he‐‐
404
00:15:48,365 --> 00:15:49,658
‐ Roald.
405
00:15:49,658 --> 00:15:51,952
‐ Phasers set to stun, Tanzy!
406
00:15:51,952 --> 00:15:53,370
TANIS:
"Tanzy." If this becomes a thing,
407
00:15:53,370 --> 00:15:55,372
I swear to Christ, I will‐‐
‐ Walk‐up music.
408
00:15:55,372 --> 00:15:57,749
A critical factor in
creating a team's identity.
409
00:15:57,749 --> 00:15:59,710
The Vancouver Canucks have
Where The Streets Have No Name.
410
00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:00,419
‐ U2.
411
00:16:00,419 --> 00:16:02,045
‐ Anaheim Ducks have Bro Hymn.
‐ Pennywise.
412
00:16:02,045 --> 00:16:03,630
‐ Buffalo Sabres have
Let Me Clear My Throat.
413
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:04,631
‐ DJ Kool.
414
00:16:04,631 --> 00:16:06,091
‐ And the Letterkenny Irish have...
415
00:16:06,091 --> 00:16:08,093
‐ Hmm... A floor burner?
‐ Hmm...
416
00:16:08,093 --> 00:16:09,052
A heart‐string tugger?
417
00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:11,305
‐ Might I suggest...
‐ [hissing]
418
00:16:11,805 --> 00:16:12,848
A Boogie?
419
00:16:15,184 --> 00:16:16,435
[sighs]
420
00:16:16,435 --> 00:16:18,520
‐ Youse ready?
‐ We're missing a few guys, boys.
421
00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:19,730
‐ Who?
422
00:16:19,730 --> 00:16:23,150
‐ Barts, Yorkie, Scholtzy,
Fisky, Boomtown.
423
00:16:23,150 --> 00:16:25,569
‐ We're not missing anyone.
All right, fuck those guys.
424
00:16:25,569 --> 00:16:27,154
I don't want to talk
about them right now.
425
00:16:27,154 --> 00:16:30,657
I got a player who plays bigger
than all of them combined, so...
426
00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:31,575
‐ No.
‐ Not...
427
00:16:31,575 --> 00:16:34,411
‐ Oh, yes.
BOTH: No!
428
00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:35,913
‐ [Shoresy farts]
SHORESY: Will you two just
429
00:16:35,913 --> 00:16:37,206
man up and make out?
430
00:16:37,206 --> 00:16:40,375
I started an office pool for it
and the day I picked is tomorrow.
431
00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:41,293
Get tuggin', tit fuckers.
432
00:16:41,293 --> 00:16:43,128
‐ [Shoresy farts]
‐ Fuck you, Shoresy.
433
00:16:43,128 --> 00:16:44,087
SHORESY:
Fuck you, Jonesy.
434
00:16:44,087 --> 00:16:46,715
Your mom pulled the goalie on me
and now she's preggo.
435
00:16:46,715 --> 00:16:49,009
Surprise, son.
Go rake the fuckin' yard. [farts]
436
00:16:49,009 --> 00:16:51,303
‐ Fuck you, Shoresy.
SHORESY: Fuck you, Reilly.
437
00:16:51,303 --> 00:16:52,930
I slipped one past your mom, too.
438
00:16:52,930 --> 00:16:55,474
Her preggo farts
smell like hot dog water.
439
00:16:55,474 --> 00:16:57,142
‐ [Shoresy farts]
‐ Fuck you, Shoresy.
440
00:16:57,142 --> 00:16:58,519
SHORESY: Fuck you, Jonesy.
441
00:16:58,519 --> 00:17:01,855
Your mom's in her first trimester,
and already bitching about baby brain.
442
00:17:01,855 --> 00:17:03,774
Had to tell her she's been
dumber than Reilly's mom
443
00:17:03,774 --> 00:17:04,733
since the genesis.
444
00:17:04,733 --> 00:17:06,652
‐ [Shoresy farts]
‐ Fuck you, Shoresy.
445
00:17:06,652 --> 00:17:07,611
SHORESY:
Fuck you, Reilly.
446
00:17:07,611 --> 00:17:10,239
I talked your mom into
a three‐way with our midwife
447
00:17:10,239 --> 00:17:11,698
and she gassed us both out of the room.
448
00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:13,116
I'm fuckin' humiliated.
[farts]
449
00:17:13,116 --> 00:17:14,618
‐ Fuck you, Shoresy.
450
00:17:14,618 --> 00:17:15,744
SHORESY:
Fuck you, Jonesy.
451
00:17:15,744 --> 00:17:18,747
Your mom wants to name the baby after
the place it was conceived.
452
00:17:18,747 --> 00:17:21,124
Can't wait to meet
Martha's Vineyard Shore.
453
00:17:21,124 --> 00:17:22,835
‐ [Shoresy farts]
‐ Fuck you, Shoresy.
454
00:17:22,835 --> 00:17:23,836
SHORESY:
Fuck you, Reilly.
455
00:17:23,836 --> 00:17:24,878
Your mom wants the same thing.
456
00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:27,214
How do I shorten down
"Handicapped Bathroom
457
00:17:27,214 --> 00:17:29,591
at Cheesecake Factory in Boca Raton."
458
00:17:29,591 --> 00:17:30,968
‐ [Shoresy farts]
BOTH: Fuck!
459
00:17:32,970 --> 00:17:34,680
‐ All right, starting up front.
460
00:17:34,680 --> 00:17:35,889
Reilly, you ready?
‐ I'm ready.
461
00:17:35,889 --> 00:17:37,015
‐ Good, 'cause you're goin'.
462
00:17:37,015 --> 00:17:38,350
Jonesy, you ready?
‐ I'm ready.
463
00:17:38,350 --> 00:17:39,351
‐ Good, 'cause you're goin'.
464
00:17:39,351 --> 00:17:41,061
‐ Shoresy, you ready?
‐[Shoresy farts]
465
00:17:41,061 --> 00:17:42,271
‐ Good, 'cause you're goin'.
466
00:17:42,271 --> 00:17:44,857
‐ All right, the Letterkenny Irish
are back.
467
00:17:44,857 --> 00:17:47,901
‐ Not yet. This still could get
fuckin' embarrassing.
468
00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:49,778
‐ [static on radio]
‐ [sighs]
469
00:17:49,778 --> 00:17:51,363
‐ Skids, you ready?
ROALD: Ready.
470
00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:53,323
‐ We are not ready!
‐ Uh...
471
00:17:53,323 --> 00:17:54,950
TANIS:
They're coming out! Press play!
472
00:17:54,950 --> 00:17:56,034
‐ I don't have a song yet.
473
00:17:56,034 --> 00:17:57,411
‐ What's in this CD player?
474
00:17:57,411 --> 00:17:59,538
Susan Aglukark.
475
00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:01,999
‐ Shit. Figure skaters
must have had the ice before.
476
00:18:01,999 --> 00:18:03,166
‐ That is sexist!
477
00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:04,418
‐ I can't work like this!
478
00:18:05,335 --> 00:18:06,920
TANIS:
Press play!
479
00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:09,590
‐ If I'm you, I'm listening to the lady.
480
00:18:16,305 --> 00:18:18,557
♪ "O Siem" by Susan Aglukark playing ♪
481
00:18:22,019 --> 00:18:23,937
♪ O Siem ♪
482
00:18:23,937 --> 00:18:27,858
♪ We are all family ♪
483
00:18:27,858 --> 00:18:30,194
♪ O Siem ♪
484
00:18:30,194 --> 00:18:31,570
♪ We're all the same ♪
485
00:18:31,570 --> 00:18:35,991
JIM: Welcome, one and all,
to Letterkenny Memorial Arena
486
00:18:35,991 --> 00:18:37,910
for this afternoon's matinee game
487
00:18:37,910 --> 00:18:39,620
between the Letterkenny Irish
488
00:18:39,620 --> 00:18:42,456
and the Letterkenny Shamrockettes.
489
00:18:42,456 --> 00:18:45,000
Don't forget to buy your 50/50 tickets.
490
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:47,377
I'd say this afternoon's grand total
491
00:18:47,377 --> 00:18:49,505
could reach $100.
492
00:18:49,505 --> 00:18:52,758
[auctioneer calling]
493
00:18:57,513 --> 00:18:59,264
Sold.
494
00:18:59,264 --> 00:19:00,974
‐ Camera dudes set up?
495
00:19:00,974 --> 00:19:02,518
‐ Affirmative.
‐ "Affirmative."
496
00:19:02,518 --> 00:19:04,019
What is this,
the Starship fuckin' Enterprise?
497
00:19:04,019 --> 00:19:06,230
‐ I wish.
‐ Me, too. I wish.
498
00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:07,981
‐ [sighs] Good. Mike's on?
499
00:19:07,981 --> 00:19:09,608
‐ Affirm‐matory?
500
00:19:09,608 --> 00:19:10,817
‐ Fine.
501
00:19:10,817 --> 00:19:12,277
‐ Engage.
‐ Flip on the monitor.
502
00:19:12,277 --> 00:19:13,779
‐ Engaging monitor.
503
00:19:18,492 --> 00:19:20,619
SHORESY:
Nice fuckin' bird cage.
504
00:19:20,619 --> 00:19:23,622
At the end of the day,
what are you really protecting?
505
00:19:23,622 --> 00:19:25,624
BOTH:
Fuck you, Shoresy.
506
00:19:25,624 --> 00:19:26,875
‐ Perfect.
507
00:19:28,961 --> 00:19:30,921
‐ Gotta work with what we've got, bro.
508
00:19:30,921 --> 00:19:32,798
‐ Let's get this fuckin' over with, bro.
509
00:19:34,633 --> 00:19:36,885
‐ Great day for competitive
men's hockey, eh.
510
00:19:36,885 --> 00:19:38,011
What's women's hockey like?
511
00:19:38,011 --> 00:19:40,097
Same things,
less competitive or what?
512
00:19:40,097 --> 00:19:42,182
[blows whistle]
513
00:19:43,517 --> 00:19:45,769
[crowd cheering]
514
00:19:47,980 --> 00:19:49,773
‐ [buzzer sounds]
‐ [referee blows whistle]
515
00:19:49,773 --> 00:19:52,025
[crowd cheering]
516
00:19:56,655 --> 00:19:58,490
BOTH:
Fuck you, Shoresy.
517
00:19:58,490 --> 00:20:02,119
‐ First puck of the campaign, boys.
Fuckin' get involved!
518
00:20:02,828 --> 00:20:06,331
♪ "Under Moonlight" by
Death From Above plays ♪
519
00:20:18,719 --> 00:20:20,846
[cheering]
520
00:20:21,430 --> 00:20:23,932
SHORESY: Hey, you look like
that broad from The Hunger Games.
521
00:20:23,932 --> 00:20:26,393
I'm gonna call you Cuteness Everdeen.
522
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:27,477
You like edamame?
523
00:20:27,477 --> 00:20:29,313
[whistle blows]
524
00:20:29,313 --> 00:20:30,856
‐ Short shifts, Cuteness.
525
00:20:30,856 --> 00:20:32,399
♪ Under moonlight ♪
526
00:20:32,399 --> 00:20:36,445
♪ A violent tide comes in ♪
527
00:20:42,242 --> 00:20:45,037
♪ The streets are wild... ♪
528
00:20:46,830 --> 00:20:48,999
SHORESY:
You skate like a fuckin' girl, birdcage.
529
00:20:48,999 --> 00:20:50,000
‐ 'Cause I am one.
530
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,460
SHORESY:
No, you're not.
531
00:20:52,211 --> 00:20:53,545
Are you really?
532
00:20:53,545 --> 00:20:54,838
Holy fuck.
533
00:20:55,631 --> 00:20:57,466
♪ It came like a wave ♪
534
00:20:58,759 --> 00:21:01,595
♪ They came crashing over me ♪
535
00:21:01,595 --> 00:21:04,806
♪ If I could breathe
I could swim away ♪
536
00:21:04,806 --> 00:21:06,558
♪ Swim away... ♪
537
00:21:14,066 --> 00:21:16,944
‐ Hey, what's your favorite
kind of pizza, Cuteness?
538
00:21:16,944 --> 00:21:18,195
Mine's pizza ass.
539
00:21:19,947 --> 00:21:21,865
Short shifts...
540
00:21:21,865 --> 00:21:23,909
♪ It came like a wave ♪
541
00:21:25,202 --> 00:21:27,704
♪ They came crashing over me ♪
542
00:21:27,704 --> 00:21:30,916
♪ If I could breathe I could swim away ♪
543
00:21:31,875 --> 00:21:34,044
♪ It came like a wave ♪
544
00:21:35,128 --> 00:21:37,965
♪ No one can be me but me ♪
545
00:21:37,965 --> 00:21:40,342
♪ If I could stand I could run away ♪
546
00:21:41,301 --> 00:21:44,304
♪ Run away ♪
547
00:21:44,304 --> 00:21:46,557
[buzzer sounds]
548
00:21:46,557 --> 00:21:49,184
‐ Good shift, Cuteness. Oh!
549
00:21:50,185 --> 00:21:53,397
We should change our Facebook status
to "It's complicated."
550
00:22:01,154 --> 00:22:02,906
MARIE‐FRED:
Look what the cat dragged in.
551
00:22:02,906 --> 00:22:04,616
WAYNE: Oh, it's better than
what the cat coughed up.
552
00:22:04,616 --> 00:22:05,492
‐ Oh.
553
00:22:05,492 --> 00:22:07,995
[makes kissing sounds]
Who's that Bronco Buster?
554
00:22:07,995 --> 00:22:11,206
‐ Oh, that's Zeke.
‐ Zeke's having a roll in the hay.
555
00:22:11,206 --> 00:22:13,834
‐ Oh, that's barley.
‐ Can we keep him?
556
00:22:15,919 --> 00:22:19,381
‐ A gal I used to date brought him over
asking for some help with him.
557
00:22:19,381 --> 00:22:20,716
Temporarily.
558
00:22:20,716 --> 00:22:21,967
‐ She pushin' up?
559
00:22:21,967 --> 00:22:23,343
‐ No.
‐ Would I like her?
560
00:22:23,343 --> 00:22:24,303
‐ Yeah.
561
00:22:24,303 --> 00:22:26,430
‐ When a friend asks for help,
you help them, right?
562
00:22:26,430 --> 00:22:27,598
[barking]
563
00:22:27,598 --> 00:22:28,891
Is he sleeping with us?
564
00:22:28,891 --> 00:22:30,517
‐ Puppies should be crate trained.
565
00:22:30,517 --> 00:22:32,269
They go in the crate
every time you leave the house,
566
00:22:32,269 --> 00:22:33,896
or go to sleep, no exceptions.
567
00:22:33,896 --> 00:22:35,522
‐ Well, he may be the only one
568
00:22:35,522 --> 00:22:38,358
getting some sleep tonight.
Pitter‐patter.
569
00:22:42,237 --> 00:22:44,156
‐ Oh, who's a good boy?
570
00:22:48,744 --> 00:22:51,830
‐ You guys get fully changed
in between periods?
571
00:22:51,830 --> 00:22:55,417
Oh, why do women have to be so different?
‐ We concede.
572
00:22:55,417 --> 00:22:58,587
‐ Oh. Don't be bitter biscuits.
573
00:22:58,587 --> 00:23:00,005
‐ We're not.
574
00:23:00,005 --> 00:23:02,174
‐ I've seen bitter biscuits,
and what I'm seeing
575
00:23:02,174 --> 00:23:04,301
is a lot of bitter biscuitry.
576
00:23:04,301 --> 00:23:07,054
‐ Sometimes you get speed‐bagged.
‐ Happens in hockey.
577
00:23:07,054 --> 00:23:08,972
‐ Okay. Look.
578
00:23:08,972 --> 00:23:11,517
Women can do anything men can do...
579
00:23:11,517 --> 00:23:13,352
‐ Shut the fuck up.
‐ We're in.
580
00:23:13,352 --> 00:23:15,771
‐ In what?
‐ To coach, idiot.
581
00:23:15,771 --> 00:23:17,481
‐ Ice time's expensive.
Let's use it for practice.
582
00:23:17,481 --> 00:23:19,274
Set up the PK. Get the PP going.
583
00:23:19,274 --> 00:23:21,568
‐ Get jerseys sorted for your line combos.
584
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:28,158
‐ What are you smiling about?
585
00:23:28,158 --> 00:23:30,077
‐ The Letterkenny Irish are back.
586
00:23:30,619 --> 00:23:33,205
[laughs]
587
00:23:33,789 --> 00:23:36,834
[Right On, Frankenstein!
by Death From Above playing]
588
00:23:36,834 --> 00:23:41,046
♪ You don't believe in ghosts ♪
589
00:23:44,883 --> 00:23:48,011
♪ Lightning strikes the body ♪
590
00:23:48,011 --> 00:23:51,890
♪ And threatens life the most ♪
591
00:24:10,742 --> 00:24:12,953
♪ I do my own grades lately ♪
592
00:24:12,953 --> 00:24:14,705
♪ I don't need any help ♪
593
00:24:15,497 --> 00:24:17,207
♪ Just let me sit here quiet ♪
594
00:24:17,207 --> 00:24:19,334
♪ In here by myself ♪
595
00:24:19,334 --> 00:24:21,795
♪ I don't wanna die
but I wanna be buried ♪
596
00:24:21,795 --> 00:24:24,840
♪ Meet me at the gates
of the cemetery ♪
597
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:26,341
♪ I've been a zombie lately ♪
598
00:24:26,341 --> 00:24:27,801
♪ I got nothin' to say... ♪