# It all starts now... #
IAIN STIRLING: Love Island Unseen Bits is back,
which means the summer has officially begun.
Go! Whoa!
We've had highs... SHE SCREAMS
Iain Stirling, I'm coming after your job, bro.
Ugh!
..lows... SCREAMS
..ups... Ah!
..lows... SCREAMS
..downs. LAUGHTER
..ups... Ah!
..downs. LAUGHTER
Not to mention all the usual...
Oh! ..flirting...
What do you call your vagina? THEY MEW
..farting... FARTS
SHE GAGS
Is that doing it for you?
..with plenty of food for thought.
Dinosaurs still exist, right?
# It all starts now... #
We're the most popular Love Island Saturday night spin-off show
in the country bar none.
You will see some sights in these bathrooms.
If you've not seen it before, where have you been?!
Oh, my God, mate.
SHE LAUGHS It's time to suck it and see.
Hello! Jesus!
Oh! SHE SCREAMS
Hello?
This is Love Island Unseen Bits.
# It all starts now. #
Anyone going to come and join us or...?
ALL:No.
IAIN STIRLING: Do you dare enter? Come in.
DOOR CREEKS Come closer.
That's right, welcome to the Love Island villa.
SCREAMING
I'm Iain Sterling and you're invited to join me inside.
Unseen Bits is back and we're not the only ones...
SHE SCREAMS
..as it's the return of the yellow beanbag.
SCREAMING
And they have mutated. Cue the drama.
I've been dumped from the Island.
Miss it at your peril.
You won't believe it until you see it.
SCREAMING
So come, won't you join me...
I can hear footsteps. Ssh!
..in the most loved-up villa in the world?
Hurry, or you'll miss all the bumps...
LAUGHTER
..the burps... HE BURPS
..and the LOLs. LAUGHTER
Welcome to Love Island Unseen Bits.
Time to cast your minds back to the old days, well, Monday,
when our fresh-faced Islanders dropped rocked up to the villa
for the first time, and time for me to use my trusty old catchphrase...
cue the gratuitous slow-mo!
With all the delays and airport chaos recently,
transfers to the villa were standing room only,
but health and safety was adhered to
as we did have the child locks on.
Oh, unlock it. It's not opening. No, it's not. It's locked.
# They say I come and I go
# Tell me all the ways you need me
# I'm not here for long
# Catch me or I go Houdini
# I come and I go
# Prove you got... #
Are you OK? Looking great, by the way.
Thank you. So are you two.
It's like you've made an effort for me.
LAUGHTER
# I come and I go
# Tell me all the ways you need me
# I'm not here for long... #
Nice to meet you. Oh, my God. Here we go, boys!
It's go time, apparently.
Before the slow-mo strut into the villa,
our Islanders recorded some videos to introduce themselves.
They say you only get one chance to make a good impression,
but on Unseen Bits, you get two.
Here are the bits you didn't get to see the first time.
Let's do it.
# I love you, is that OK
# These words are my own... #
I'm on Love Island!
# I love you, I love you I love you, I love you
# There's no other way
# To better say
# I love you, I love you, I love you
# These words are my own
# From my heart flow
# I love you, I love you I love you, I love you... #
I like masculine guys, masculine energy.
BDE, can I say that? Yes, Patsy, of course.
This is Unseen Bits. Big Dick Energy.
It's going to be the best summer of our lives.
# These words are my own
# From my heart flow
# I love you, I love you I love you, I love you
# There's no other way
# To better say... #
Yeah, good thing you're sitting down. Oh, boy.
# These words I my own
# From my heart flow
# I love you, I love you I love you, I love you
# There's no other way
# To better say
# I love you, is that OK? #
It wasn't long before our Islanders
found themselves chatting by the sundeck.
How they got there is anyone's guess, their geography is terrible.
Where is everyone from? You're from? South Wales. South Wales.
East London. East London. Hertfordshire.
So, like, we're northern and you're southern, aren't you? Yeah.
Yeah. I guess, yeah. Kind of.
I think Wales is in the north. No. Wales is...
East. Oh, I dunno.
LAUGHTER East, west. I'm down south.
Oh!
You'd better clear that up otherwise we'll lose our deposit.
Now you lot already know who's coupled up with who.
When Maya got the Islanders to line up
from most to least boyfriend or girlfriend material...
You at the top. Oh, that's nice. Thanks, guys.
MAYA: Girls, from most to least, please head over and join your boys.
Come on over, Mimii. Nice to meet you.
You too, darling. Thanks.
Yeah, we're both down here at the bottom.
I didn't expect that. No, literally.
I'm annoyed you put me at the end but I'm actually happy.
I'm annoyed you put me at the end!
Mimii and Munveer were found to be greater than the other Islanders.
Harriett and Ciaran, to be less than.
You've heard of girl math, you've heard of boy math,
but I give you Maya maths.
It's a unique form of genuinely mental arithmetic.
Out of ten, I rate myself a solid 11.
I'd give myself a nice ten out of ten.
OK, so that's a score of 21 from Munveer and Mimii.
I'll score myself 11 out of ten. I think I'm a ten out of ten.
That gives Sean and Nicole 21, as well.
I would rate myself a ten out of ten.
Probably ten-ten, but realistically, I'm probably about an eight.
A total of 18 for Harriett and Ciaran.
So, I would say eight out of ten, I would rate myself.
6' 2", but we'll go 6' 3", though, with these shoes on.
OK, Ronnie clearly didn't understand the brief,
but we can make this work.
Where's Rachel Riley when you need her?
Jess gives herself an eight, Ronnie a 6' 2",
so that's obviously eight times six, which is 48.
Times that by two to the power of Grayskull,
giving us a score of 96.
Looking good for Ronnie and Jess' compatibility.
I'm 6' 6". I have got some nice, big size seven feet.
Right, so if Ayo is 6' 6", that's 6.6,
divided by seven is 0.94, I believe.
Definitely, with a mullet, you kind of get...
you get a lot of attention,
and I feel like I'm going to rock it for a couple more years, definitely.
In my job, I'm getting paid £45 an hour
to do someone's make-up for them to go for their tea,
cos that's just what Scouse girls do.
So, if Samantha gets £45 an hour,
then that's 45 times 24 to the power of Sam's mullet, which gives us...
I have no idea.
I can't believe we got through that without a single 69 joke. Oops!
Once they were all paired up, which equals two, by the way,
it was time for them to get to know each other better
with the old tried and tested "Awks Talks".
I know, but it's Sam and Sam, which is just so weird... I know.
..like Samantha and a Sam.
Could be a thing, could be a... could be a thing.
You're Northern, aren't you? Yeah, yeah.
Being Northern, we're just a different breed, aren't we?
We're like salt of the earth. Facts.
And things are getting spicy up on the terrace.
What's your Nando's order? Oof, erm...
I get halloumi, course. OK, yeah.
Four chicken thighs. Mm-hm.
Medium-hot, I'm right. I just wanna enjoy my food.
Wow, I'm an extra-hot girl. Are you? Yeah.
Some islanders are more suited to the rizz biz than others.
Argh! Do that one more time!
What's your favourite colour? My favourite colour... Go on, guess.
Blue. Yeah, actually. That is good.
Right, go on, then, guess mine.
I'm just gonna go... I'm gonna go purple. Are you joking?
Nah, you're lying. Did I get it right?
No, no, no, no, no, I hate purple.
Have you got a sweet tooth, or are you more savoury? Hmm...
Sweet tooth, I'd say. Are you?
What is your go-to? Oh, I don't know.
You know what I really like, I don't even know what it's called.
They are like the cola bottles, pink and blue. Bubble gum bottles.
You know what, they are in my top three, to be fair.
Shut up, are they? Yeah.
Fizzy ones, and they've got, like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mm.
Munveer was also doing some sweet talking, too, of his own.
You know what I learned in Spanish? Go on. Erm... Esto si que es.
Ooh, say it again. Esto si que es. Esto si tes.
Esto si que es. Es so si te es.
I could be making this up, by the way. Oh, stop. I'm too gullible.
Esto si que es. And I THINK it translates to, "It is what it is."
I like that. Es so si... Yeah.
So basically, I'll let you in on the little trick.
It's basically spelling "socks". S-O-C-K-S!
Yes! There you go! Yeah! I like that. It is...
And then you can just add, like, a bit of, you know, a twang to it,
and you're like, you fool anyone.
You won't fool me, Munveer, I think you'll find that's P-A-N-T-S.
On the first night in a new gaff,
all you want to do is get glammed up for the night ahead.
But disaster struck and the girls' luggage got lost in transit.
How anyone can lose six giant Love Island branded wheelie cases
with their names written on it is a mystery.
Luckily, a runner from the airport turned up with the missing bags.
DOORBELL RINGS
Oi, girls, your cases are outside!
Oh, let's go get them bags. Let's go and get them!
SHE SQUEALS
LAUGHTER
Stop! ALL:Wow!
GASPS They look so good.
It's so nice to, like... THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER
SAMANTHA EXCLAIMS Oh, my gosh.
THEY SCREAM
Right, girls, I can't find mine. Is this it?
Patsy, Patsy. There, right next to you. Right there.
Yeah? Oh, yeah. Here we go.
Oops!
Don't know which one I want.
ALL EXCLAIM
Which dressing room ... dressing table are we all claiming?
Can I have this one at the end? Yeah, this is my one at the end.
THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER Come on, girlies.
Come on, girls, you haven't got time for selfies.
You've got a big night ahead.
MUSIC: 'The Only Way Is Up' by Yazz
The world of reality TV imploded in on itself
when our very own Reem Queen
introduced a well-known face to the islanders.
# Hold on Hold on
# Baby, hold on
# The only way is up... #
Yes, Maya. Looking reem.
# You and me now The only way is up. #
SONG ECHOES
LAUGHTER
Gonna be reem, innit? LAUGHTER
I didn't say it, you did. My hair is looking... reem. Reem.
Reem. Oh, my God. Oh, Joey. I can't believe that word.
I swear, when I said that word...
Listen, you went viral just off that word. Didn't ya?
That word literally went viral. Changed your life.
Nearly changed my life.
You know that word, I think it went in the dictionary.
Reem, yeah, I think... Urban Dictionary or Wikipedia.
It's definitely in the Urban one,
but I'm sure they was gonna put it in the dictionary,
I don't think they did in the end.
I don't think the Government approved it.
SHE SNORTS
And if you needed any more reason
to vote in the upcoming election, that is it.
Samantha told me something earlier that was absolutely unforgettable.
Oh! Did I say that? LAUGHTER
No, you'll have to come back later to find out what it is.
# Sunshine taking over me You got me feeling... #
IAIN STIRLING: Welcome back to Love Island: Unseen Bits,
where Islanders bear their souls...
AS FOOT:Hello.
..unleash their inner voices...
Eee-oww.
..fall over themselves to impress,
and like us, discuss their unseen bits.
What do you call your vagina?
So brush up on your beauty tips...
I really don't know how this works.
..and drink in all our eye-watering unseen clips.
Ah. Ow. Oh, my God, mate.
Before the break, Samantha was about to reveal all,
and I know you're dying to find out what it is.
So go on then, Samantha love.
Ugh! Did I say that? CHUCKLES
The Scouse saying for lads when they've got, like, uh,
you know like a middle part, where they're all, like, pushed back
or, like, the little bangs. That's a fanny part.
Like, I haven't got mine in a fanny part now.
Like, mine is not a centre apart,
but if it was in the middle, that's a fanny part.
A fanny part? Can someone pass me a comb?
The first villa challenge of the series saw all the Islanders
play a classic game of phone roulette.
We saw snogging, finger sucking, and even fake orgasms.
MOANS I can't! I can't do any more!
One more. No, I can't.
Keep going, keep going, keep going. Keep going, keep going. OK.
MOANS, LAUGHTER
SQUEALS That is mortifying!
And in true Unseen Bits fashion,
here are the bits you didn't get to see.
Sean, snog the Islander that you think you would make
the prettiest babies with. Ooh.
Munveer. Oh, hello.
TEXT ALERT
Snog the Islander that you think is the sexiest.
Ooh! Who have you got your eyes on, cuz?
Ha! Eventful challenge. I think I kissed every boy in here.
Like, couldn't have gone better for me.
OK, Jess. Twerk on the Islander you fancy the most.
I can't twerk, I can't dance!
Have fun with it. Come on, Jess.
ALL SHOUT ENCOURAGEMENT
I'm gonna do it on you, only because it's just, like,
the easiest to do it on.
Spread your le... No, I'm joking.
ALL SHOUT ENCOURAGEMENT
I can't. Boo-yah!
I'll just do a little slut drop.
CHEERING
There you go. Twerking a bit.
I really enjoyed that challenge. Can we play that tomorrow?
Do you think the sun is beaming out there?
There is only one way to find out, my boy!
Awful. My God. I'm gonna make, uh...
Let me show you how you make some eggs.
Mimii wants her eggs, innit?
First morning in the villa,
and Munveer is already cracking on with Mimii.
All right, Mimi? Scrambled eggs, two of them?
Yes, please. I got you, girl.
Aye, see? Watch and learn, bruv. AYO LAUGHS
See what you got, shall we?
I have 12 eggs a day. I have six. Do you?
Well, I have six in the morning and six at night.
He has got to be egg-aggerating.
Gordon Ramsay over here.
OK. Now we're cheffing.
He seems egg-cited.
Here we go. Where are the eggs at?
You'll find on this show,
we don't like to keep all our eggs in one basket.
There's only six eggs, bro.
I can make eggs for everyone, but there's only six eggs.
Eggs are the best, ain't they?
Really good natural source of protein.
Yeah, so, yeah, I love an egg. I'm not gonna lie, I love eggs.
We've only got six eggs.
Well, that was an egg-hausting unseen clip.
Quick shout out to Gareth Southgate, if you're watching.
It's not too late to draft a few new players in your Euro squad.
Check this out.
ALL TALK AT ONCE, LAUGHTER
ALL TALK AT ONCE
CHEERING
They think it's all over, and thank God it is now.
On to our next unseen clip.
Now, you may have noticed that the veteran reality TV personality
Joey Essex is in the villa this year. It's a happy accident.
Joey was supposed to be opening a new traffic island in Billericay,
but misread the email and ended up here.
We didn't have the heart to tell him, so just rolled with it.
So taking my inspiration from Mr Essex himself,
I've got a few ideas to pitch to the big bosses of TV.
RINGING TONE Hello?
Yeah, this is Iain Stirling here. INDISTINCT
I've got a few ideas for shows that I want to pitch to you.
INDISTINCT Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, they'll all have Joey Essex in.
INDISTINCT
Love Splash? SPLASH
I'm A Love Celeb... Get Me Out Of Here?
What is that? Is that a crab? That's a clap. No, it's a spider.
That's not spider, it's a baby crab. Crabs ain't like that!
There's a baby crab! MasterChef Island?
What's that? Ham? She's making a toastie, but she's, like, gone.
I'm just gonna have some ham. Just straight up ham.
Why not? Mm.
..LI Cribs Majorca? Celebs Go Eating?
Bro, I met you years ago outside, er, the burger van in Surbiton.
What was I doing? Was I doing an appearance or something?
No, no, you were just having a burger, brother! Oh, shit!
No? Right, OK. What about, erm... Love On Ice?
Dancing On Ice Versus Land?
The Jump?
Actually, maybe just Educating Joey.
I felt like I did gravitate towards...
I can't believe I'm using that word so much recently.
I don't even really know what it means. Gravitate? Gravitate.
Is that like gravity? Yeah, pulls you in a little bit.
Gravit... "Gravi-tied". What is it again? Gravitated. Gravitated.
I'm gonna see who gravitates... DING
Gravitates?
"Gravivates"? BUZZER
Is it "gravitate"? DING
Is it fair to say the three girls that you snogged yesterday
are the ones that you were initially attracted to?
Well, I said, they're the ones that I...
I keep saying this word, and it's really annoying me.
G-Grav... Gravita... How do you say it? Gravitate.
Gravitate. DING
Is that even a word? Something like that.
Gravitas. BUZZER
Yeah, you gravitated towards. What's a word apart from gravitate?
Erm... Pulled.
Aura. Leaned. Leaned. Got... Yeah.
Gravitated is the right word. All right, gravitated.
The Xtra Factor 50? No, not quite right.
How about Love Island: Aftersun? That'll do.
Our Islanders usually spend their first week in the villa
whispering sweet nothings to each other,
and this series is no exception.
There is a lot of "sweet talking" going on. Literally.
Obviously, you spoke to... Was it Sean as well?
He told me I was a strawberry bonbon cos they're high-demand.
THEY LAUGH
That's class. I love that. I love that chat.
I'd never think of something like that.
OK, so, what sweet would you put me as, then?
HE SIGHS
Like, a sour ball, at this rate, the way you've acted with me.
THEY LAUGH
What is that? I'm joking, I'm joking.
Erm, Turkish delight. What's the reason?
Because they're nice and it's a bit... posh sweet, innit?
OK, that's a good answer. Yeah, so...
What your favourite snack again? Jaffa Cakes. Oh, yeah.
Love a Jaffa Cake. It's literally a biscuit, though.
Oh, don't start this. It's already been deemed as a cake.
I'm so passionate about this, right? Ugh, it's a cake.
It's in the name. It's a Jaffa "Cake".
That's like saying a Victoria sponge cake's a biscuit.
Where does it sit in the kitchen? It goes in the biscuit cupboard.
So where do you put a cake? A cake?
Yeah. You put any cake? I don't really have cakes.
Birthday cake, where do you put it?
Birthday cake's separate. Like, it's on its own.
All right, well, my Jaffa Cakes are separate as well.
They go on my bedside table, and they go straight in.
IAIN STIRLING: You're wrong, Ciaran, so just shut your cake-hole.
Today, the hot "toe-pic" in the villa is toes.
Oh, you've got the same condition as me. What?
SLT. What's that?
SLT, it's a condition... Slightly long toes?
SHE LAUGHS Second long toe.
If you cut off my second long toe, and someone just randomly found it
in the street, they would think it was a finger.
I've got that! That's Greek. What are they called? SLT?
I just made that up. You need to show me your second toe now.
I measured it up against my pinky finger, and it's, like, same size.
Show me your toe now.
What, you've got an extra toe? Jesus!Oh, wow!
Do you know her second toe is bigger?
Yeah, my second toe is. I've got that.
Oh, mate, yours is... Mine's a bit higher, innit?
Yours is a whole toe bigger. My toes are naughty. Look at these.
Mate, your feet are massive. Bro, these are...He's massive!
I know. I've got size... What size are your feet? Is that 13?
These are 14. I'm a 13, but these are 14.I'm on 11.
You're 11? I'm 11, yeah. Say "swear", you're 11, bro?
These are, like, 10, I think. These are a bit small. Size 11?
I would never believe that. Bruv, you've got some long toes.
You've got big feet! THEY LAUGH
Your toes are...
Look how big my fingers are, look. You're like ET.
THEY LAUGH It's like ET.
I've had messages, people asking for pictures of my toes.
It's really, really... I don't understand why.
I've always... Why do you want...?
Why are you offering money for pictures of my toes?
But I would never sell my feet. IAIN STIRLING: Sell them!
You could rebrand yourself as "Toe-y Essex".Ooh, yeah!
Before we go to break, let's find out what Ronnie's type is.
Erm, my type? My type is...
What? You'll find out after the break.
Oh, mate. We're just the fucking commentators of Love Island.
LAUGHS
Iain Stirling, I'm coming after your job, bro.
IAIN STIRLING: Back off, Willy Wonka, this job is mine, bro.
Go on then, Sean, give it a go.
SEAN YAWNS Yeah, I think my job is safe.
Welcome back to Love Island: Unseen Bits!
Right, quick, get back to your sofa and get your snacks ready.
Mm. Because only here will you learn
what really makes our Islanders tick.
I'm not even a pooey girl.
They don't often make a lot of sense.
SPEECH MUFFLED BY TOOTHBRUSH
RONNIE:Huh?
One thing's for sure, you'll be laughing your zits off.
Who wants to pop a spot on my arse?
Samantha, you don't have sugar? Erm...
"Erm..." "Erm..."
Right, go. Now.
It's gonna be magic.
LAUGHTER
Hang on, where did he go?
That was so good! That's got lots of video, that.
Before the break, Ronnie was about to spill the tea on his type.
Go on then, tell us.
My type is, blonde, er, lovely... lovely pair of, er... teeth.
CHUCKLES
A nice pair of, er, Bristol Rovers, will call them.
Er, not sure that's the saying.
When the boys aren't grafting putting eggs in baskets and vibing,
you'll find them working hard in the gym.
They're so embarrassing, boys, the way they do this.
They've literally been in there ten minutes,
"I'm gonna go and have a protein shake."
I'm sorry, but them side dips. Yeah, look at that.
Them hip dips, Mimii. Is that doing it for you?
# Patiently, quietly, faithfully Worship me. #
Don't want them to see us looking.
We should do that thing, you know, and just go with it
when it's, like, reverse looks. Right, I'll go...
Three. Right, ready? Right, we look, and then go change.
No, you're both looking. Wait, wait, what we doing?
You're not looking, she's not looking, and then we look.
Ciaran has already caught.
Are you gonna come and join us, or...?
GIRLS: No. Ah, right.
IAIN: Here is an unseen clip that is sure to get
your mouthwatering any day of the week.
I'm a class cook. What's your favourite meal to make?
What's, like, your...? It depends what day it is.
Spaghetti Bolognese from scratch. Because imagine...
What?! No, it does!
Imagine it's, like, a cold day like it always is in Wales,
then it would be, like, warm food. I'll give you a scenario.
We're in South Wales, right,
in the valleys, any valley you wanna pick. Aberdare.
Aberdare Valley, working nine till five job
on the tools and that, like, come home, it's not raining
but it's cold and windy, what's on the table?
What day is it? You've got to give me a day.
We're gonna do a Wednesday, mid-week.
Do you know what's a good one? Bangers and mash. Oh, yeah.
Fuck, you ruined that so much. Bangers and fucking mash!
Come home from a grafting day
to a fucking mashed potato and fucking sausages!
Yeah! Mash potato is lovely!
And with onion gravy. You can't go wrong.
You're hilarious.
No, bangers and mash are nice, but...
Yeah, exactly, what are you on about?!
Why are you shouting for? You're pissing me off.
I'm stood right there.
AS CIARAN:"What you shouting for?" So go on, tell us.
Why you doing my accent? We sound the same!
Just my balls have dropped. SHE LAUGHS
Contrary to popular belief,
Joey Essex is a bit of an intellectual on the quiet,
as this unseen bit proves.
Do you know when I watch films, yeah?
I like to watch, like, real things.
Real ones, yeah. Like, documentaries.
Something I can engage in that's actually real.
Have you seen Pearl Harbor? Mm... The war one. Maybe.
Oh, yeah, with the boats and stuff? Yeah. Yeah. That's a good one.
Anything real. Cos then I can watch it
and believe that I'm actually watching something
that's true for once, instead of everyone lying to me.
You know when people say to me, "Oh, yeah, I watch..."
What's that stuff called? Cartoon stuff, weird stuff.
Anime? Anime.
Oh, who the fuck watches anime? I dunno.
What's the little blue people called? What are they called?
The little blue aliens. I don't know.
Dunno what they're called.
Everyone dresses up as them on Halloween. They're blue.
They're blue? Oh, dunno what they're called.
Oh, really? Animers. I dunno.
I don't watch it. Little blue animated people.
But everyone loves it. Smurfs? No.
They're blue. They are blue, I suppose.
Erm, let me ask someone.
Oh, what are they called? Erm... They'll know.
Sean and MJ! Yo.
What is them blue, erm, things... How to explain this?
You know, like, d'you watch films? Yeah.
What's them blue people called? Avatars. Avatars.
Oh! I just don't get it.
SEAN AND MUNVEER LAUGH
Like, why would you watch an avatar? It's just...
They ain't telling the truth. It's not real.
Do you like scary films? I don't mind some horror films, yeah.
IAIN: Well, if you like horror films, Joey,
this one will have you hiding behind a sun lounger.
SCREAM
Be afraid. Be very afraid. You have been warned!
People back home call me Cole, or Coley. All, like, my baby cousin.
"Where's Coley? Where's Coley?" Like that. Oh, I love it, I do.
SHE GASPS A fucking bee!
THEY SCREAM
IAIN: Talking of bees, where would we "bee"
without our favourite part of the show? It's...
SAMANTHA:That's huge!
Erm, so, I had to... Argh! BUZZING
There's a wasp on my hand! Sorry, sorry, sorry. It went on my hand.
Erm... Argh! There was a...
BUZZING
SCREAMING
LAUGHTER
It's gone.
Oh, fucking hell. BUZZING
Argh, fuck off! Argh!
BUZZING
Up for it today.
Come on, boys. BUZZING
Oh, what is that by your head?Huh? There's a massive wasp by your head.
BUZZING
Argh!
What was that?
SHE SCREAMS It's on your head!
Oh, my God, it's actually on your head.No, it's not! Fuck off!
Oh, my God. Yes, it was.
It was on your head. It was on my head.
BUZZING Whoa!
Mate, that is massive. What is that?
BUZZING Fucking hell! What is that?
BUZZING
Urgh! If it comes in here, mate, oh, my God. A moth.
That's not a moth, mate. That's, like, a beetle. A beetle.
Fuck! BUZZING
I was thinking I'd unpack my bags, but today...
BUZZING Oh, for God's sake!
Sorry. Did I have a wasp on my head? No, you're OK.
BUZZING
IAIN: Here's an unseen pool clip of Ronnie, Ayo and Ciaran,
apparently three of our most athletic Islanders,
competing to impress umpires Nicole and Jess.
I'm gonna clap.
NICOLE:We are right on the edge to see who's cheating.
Oh, they having a race?
We set up the three hunks of the villa... Ha!
..to see who could take trumps in a little race.
Right, three... Wait, Ciaran's not ready.
Focus on the game. Ready? Three, two, one, go!
KLAXON
Oh, he's got it in the bag, Ronnie has. He's got it in the fucking bag.
Ronnie took the lead... Shocked.
..by quite a fair mile, yeah, I'm shocked. Yeah, shocked.
LAUGHTER Ciaran's last!
I thought Ciaran might have had a little chance,
but there was just no way.
You'd think a rugby player from Wales, you know, an athlete.
No, he just let the team completely down, like.
Ronnie got it in the bag! CHEERING
Ayo, you let us down! You let us down!
We underestimated Ronnie, big-time, cos he just smashed it.
He's got good stamina.
Yeah. It's good to see. He can keep it up!
Yeah, he might leave here now and straight onto the Olympics.
He'll get signed. Team GB.
Yeah. Ciaran, I don't think he's got a chance, no.
IAIN: That's a surprise. I thought Wales were good in water.
Nice try, Ciaran.
We've got just enough time for one more unseen clip.
If you've got any expensive glassware,
now would be a good time to hide the mute button.
Oh, no, sorry, we've run out of time.
You'll have to come back after the break to see...
# Whoa, baby
# My heart is full of love And desire for you... #
IAIN STIRLING: Welcome back to the final part
of Love Island Unseen Bits.
Hi, gorgeous. SHE SCREAMS
RONNIE:Agh! Cut.
We use everything on this show. Bits like this...
Also, anyone seen me nipple cream?
..and this... Youse must see some sights.
And some sounds. What are your thoughts?
FARTS That's what I thought.
LAUGHTER
Before the break, we were in the girls' dressing room,
and things were reaching a crescendo.
Well, here's my What Happened Next?!
Can you actually see my mini?
SHE SQUEALS You can!
Can you test this for me? Please. LAUGHTER
Harriett managed to hit the high note, but then fell flat.
Oh, my God!
Every series, the boys use the same tactics
to try and get the girls' attention, and it never really seems to work.
Offering to buy a girl a drink is standard dating practice,
but offering to make them one
is the oldest Love Island chat-up trick in the book.
Isn't that right, Ronnie?
Does anyone else want one? Can I have one of those ones, please?
What's on the menu? So, plain?
No, the one you made Jess. I can do anything.
Yeah, what? The powder? Yeah, please.
Can you make me a cocktail, please? I can try.
Yeah, see what you can rustle up. All right.
Yeah, surprise us, Ronners. What? You don't want water?
No, I want what Jess had. She wants something cocktail-y.
See what's the best thing you can make. All right, watch this.
LAUGHTER
I've put pineapple juice, apple juice, orange juice
and a bit of that in this.
Do you do that when you go Nando's? Yeah, just mix everything.
Bit of Coke, bit of Sprite. What's it saying? Try. It's for the girls.
Electrolytes and all the juices. Mate. Not bad, that, is it?
Please could I get a straw? This is a Ron... Ronnie's...
Wow! ..tester. OK, nice, thank you.
A little umbrella, no?
No, no, no, this is just if you want it, and I'll put in your bottles.
All right, thank you. Yum. Nice, isn't it?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's doing bits.
You want to try? Yeah. Go on, then.
Mimii, you wanna jump in? I'm all right, babes. On the water.
You sure? Mmm.
Very fresh. You like?
I love. Go on let's taste it, then.
It's really nice. Thank you.
I can do a lot of things, you know. Man of many talents. You like?
It's nice, yeah. You want one, as well? No, no.
I'll put it in this, yeah? All right, thanks, babe.
He is fit. He's so fit.
They liked it. Yeah?Like...
What did you make? They liked my cock... tail.
That's what I was saying... LAUGHTER
Ronnie, I want a pink straw, please.
You get what you're given, buddy. No.
Thank you. Pink straw. Do you want a pink one?
Please can I have a pink one?
I quite like having a boy wrapped around my finger.
Makes a nice change. LAUGHTER
IAIN: While this show is technically a reality show,
sometimes, the things our Islanders talk about
stretch reality to its limits.
Why do you think the sky is blue? Ooh...
Cos it's space, it should be, like, dark. Mm.
Like, I wonder how many grains of sand there is.
But it does go dark at night. That's the way...
THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER
I know, but the sun's on the other side of the world.
That had me for a moment.
The sun is on the other side of the world.
You a flat Earth believer? I am.
Mate, because the world is definitely round, man.
Yeah, I believe that. I dunno, I dunno.
THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER
People have been to space and seen it.
How can it be flat? But, like, the moon is round, isn't it? So...
Yeah, the moon is round, well, apparently. Don't you fly...
We go like that... We go like that, though, don't we?
We spin on an axis. Do you know when you fly...
So, the clouds aren't moving, we are actually moving.
To be fair, pilots always say it's flat.
Yeah, do you know what, yeah, they do.
Pilots have actually said, "Oh, yeah..." They always say.
Yeah, because when you go up in a plane, you go up... down.
You don't go up, backwards, up, around there, around the world...
And the only reason we are standing here is because of gravitation.
IAIN: Joey, I think you need to gravitation
towards a dictionary.
The trick to being a successful Islander
is to keep your eye on the prize.
Not easy when you are forced to wear a giant blindfold,
but rules are rules.
And they all had quite different coping mechanisms
to deal with the impending surprise.
They are putting Vaseline on. Boys, grow up!
Oh, pucker me up, then, son. LAUGHTER
I feel ashamed of the lot of youse! Embarrassing.
What do you need Vaseline for? No, you don't want Vaseline.
I'll give you Vaseline in a minute when we're in bed.
# She wants to dance Like Uma Thurman... #
I can hear footsteps. Shh!
# She wants to dance Like Uma Thurman... #
If you just take a left. LAUGHTER
It's Maya. Maya!
ALL EXCLAIM
IAIN: No, it wasn't Maya, but new Bombshell Uma.
And good job the boys had moisturised those lips,
as Uma had to go along the line and kiss each of them
before choosing who to whisk away to the Hideaway.
Oh, my goodness, darling. You're shitting me.
CIARAN: Where's what's-his-name gone? Ayo?
Ayo? Ayo, where are you?
Ayo's gone. Boys, Ayo's gone.
Who's this? This is Ronnie.
Mate, Ayo's gone!
I like your shirt. Thank you so much.
And your jeans, and your shoes.
Thank you, thank you. And your face. Thank you, thank you.
I do my best. SHE GIGGLES
How tall are you? I'm 5'9".
Obviously, I'm wearing heels. Ah.
So probably, like, I dunno. Maybe 5'11" with heels.
Yeah. You're how tall? 6'6".
That's really tall! Yeah.
Nah, you come in looking so edible.
This is just... Edible?!
Sorry. Oh, that's all right.
Yeah, it's OK. Yeah, it's OK (?)
it's really...It's great! That's a good thing, no?Yeah.
Question.Yes. Answer. I love that.
Question: What are your icks?
Bad hygiene, number one, yeah. Oof.
Whoever just kissed me has a spicy mouth, man.
Mate, my lips are on fire. I feel like I've had the extra hot.
Why have they put me last,
so I'm getting all the sloppy seconds? Like...
Mate, she was eating something. You know, like, them sweets, fireballs?
Remember the jawbreakers? Yeah, that's it, jawbreakers, yeah.
The red jawbreakers.
She's had a whole pack of jawbreakers or some shit, you know?
And her tongue.
Mate, I can't feel... My lips are killing.
Mate, mine are stinging.
IAIN: Cue the cheesy game show music
because oh, yes, people, it's time for...
Hello.
IAIN: This week, I asked our Islanders,
what's your best chat-up line?
HE LAUGHS
I've heard some cheesy ones before, most definitely.
Erm... God, that's a good one.
Erm...
I've got the Joey charm. That is my chat-up line.
I am the charm. I am a charm.
A chat-up line wouldn't work on me, no. I think I'd vomit.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
I can't make your legs feel like jam,
but I'll certainly make them feel like jelly.
SHE RETCHES, LAUGHS
Are you lost at sea? Cos I can be a sailor.
Can you do my laces up? Because I'm falling for you.
That's not a good chat-up line, is it? It's cheesy.
Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?
Oh, that was a good one, yeah.
Do you have a map? Because I think I just got lost in your eyes.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
That is the most cheesiest one I've ever heard! No.
You remind me of a magnet because you...
sure are attracting me over here.
I can't even get it out, it's so bad.
Are you a ten? No...
Are you from Tennessee? Because...
You're the only "ten I see".
I'm lost. Can you give me directions to your heart?
Are you a parking ticket?
Because you've got "fine" written all over you.
They say Disneyland is the best place on Earth,
but clearly, they've never stood next to you.
Which is the worst thing I've ever heard!
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
Kiss me if I'm wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?
I've had a lot of recently, like, "What's happening, girl?
"You all right?" Because of that TikTok sound.
"What you saying? What's happening, girl, you all right?"
I'll say, "What are you saying, girl? You good." Works every time.
Oh, what's the one about falling from heaven?
Are you a bank loan? Because you've got my interest.
Did you... Oh, what's the chat-up line?
I can't remember what it goes like now.
OK, cheesiest one has got to be, without a doubt,
top, top, top, the mermaid one.
If a girl's looking like a mermaid, then she's lost at sea.
I'll be the Aquaman to come and save her.
Are you sure you're not tired?
You've been running through my mind all day.
Are you a camera? Cos every time I look at you, I smile.
That was actually tragic.
Is your dad a boxer? Because you're a knockout.
No, no, no, no, no. Awful, awful.
If you was a fruit, you would be a "fineapple".
Are your parents bakers? Cos you definitely are a cutie pie.
Ha-ha? Like, what am I supposed to say?
IAIN: Tune in next week for another instalment of...
Bet you can't wait!
Right, I'm clocking off,
but I'll leave you in the capable hands of Samantha and Jess.
AS IAIN:Tomorrow night...
Tomorrow night... on Love Island...
Tomorrow night, Jess and Samantha are on the daybeds.
IAIN: Thanks, girls. Come back next week for some more Unseen Bits.
Subtitles by accessibility@itv.com