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00:00:05,572 --> 00:00:08,442
[dramatic music]
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00:00:08,575 --> 00:00:15,282
♪ ♪
3
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‐ What's the [bleep]?
4
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The mouse chewed right
straight through my bowstring.
5
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‐ My hope of having
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a good deer hunting spot
are crushed.
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[groans]
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‐ If I can't bring
a fixed blade with me,
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00:00:28,729 --> 00:00:31,532
cause I chose the multitool
then I just have to forge one.
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It's almost done.
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‐ I'm just gonna sit
for a second.
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I am so dizzy and nauseous.
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I am afraid that
I poisoned myself.
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‐ This is Jordan.
I am officially tapping out.
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I find myself continuingly
thinking of my daughter,
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but the difference is,
at home,
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I can look into the eyes
of my wife,
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I can look into the eyes
of my son.
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And I see a part of her there,
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and that soothes me
and that comforts me,
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and I don't have that here.
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[dramatic musical sting]
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♪ ♪
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male narrator: In "Alone's"
most terrifying location yet,
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ten participants face
the deadliest predator
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in North America.
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‐ There he is right there.
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‐ Grizzly bears.
‐ Hey, bear.
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‐ There are a lot
of grizzly here.
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I'm gonna have to live
with them.
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‐ Go on! Get!
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‐ Every second we're on
the land, we're being hunted.
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‐ Holy [bleep], mountain lion.
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‐ He's circling around
my shelter.
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narrator:
Bone‐chilling cold...
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‐ Winter is coming.
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‐ You combine the wind
with the rain and the cold,
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this place could make
the Arctic look easy.
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‐ Oh, [bleep].
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narrator:
And complete isolation.
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‐ You cannot hide
from yourself
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mentally and emotionally.
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‐ Ah!
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‐ There's no place to go.
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‐ I am suffering
from loneliness.
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narrator: Who will survive?
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‐ Yes! Yes!
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‐ This could be the end.
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‐ I don't want to tap,
but I don't want
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to die either.
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‐ You have to suffer
before you can succeed.
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[gagging]
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narrator:
The last one standing wins.
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‐ At what point
do I push the button?
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♪ ♪
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‐ I had a really strange
dream last night.
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So...
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I'm sitting outside of
a restaurant with Joe Rogan,
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and Howard Stern walks up
and sits down.
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Before they go in,
Howard turns to me and said,
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"Hey, why don't you come over
to my house later on?
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"Bring the boys.
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I've got two.
They'd get along fine."
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And I said, "All right, man.
Sounds good."
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That's it.
[chuckles]
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The belt's really
tightening up.
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It's a little concerning.
68
00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:24,237
I've been fishing
several times,
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but nothing.
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♪ ♪
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Oh, yes‐‐
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aw, damn it.
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Take it, take it.
Take it, take it.
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Oh...aw.
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Come on, come on,
come on, come on.
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Son of a bitch.
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Fishing is supposed
to be relaxing.
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It's the most stressful fishing
I've ever done.
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♪ ♪
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The closest deep water
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where I think the fishing
would be decent is
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a quarter‐mile down
to the big rock.
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00:03:52,165 --> 00:03:55,569
So today, I'm gonna start
on a landing net.
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I just need something
to dip down in there
85
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and get those fish because
86
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I'm gonna end up losing them
if I don't have a net.
87
00:04:02,976 --> 00:04:05,378
Alder wood.
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00:04:05,512 --> 00:04:06,947
I need some alder wood.
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00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,915
♪ ♪
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This is not the area
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that I was hoping it would be.
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Yeah, that'll work.
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♪ ♪
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My chances of killing a deer
are very low.
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♪ ♪
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The more I think about it,
I don't know if those deer
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are gonna be down here
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until late with this weather
being so mild.
99
00:04:29,336 --> 00:04:32,472
And so fishing maybe
the ticket for me here.
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I think I'll give this net
to Koi when I get back.
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He'd like that.
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I have to make Fin something.
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♪ ♪
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[whistling]
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♪ ♪
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[grunts]
There we go.
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I'm gonna lay the net.
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Ready to rock and roll.
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Man, yeah!
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♪ ♪
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The fish ain't gonna know
what hit them.
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♪ ♪
113
00:05:20,754 --> 00:05:22,823
All right.
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Let's try it out.
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00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:27,227
I think the lake level
came up some.
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I've gotta be careful.
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♪ ♪
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[hisses]
No, don't do that!
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[groans]
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Yeah.
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♪ ♪
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Thought it was gonna sink
for a minute.
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You have to be careful...
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about that stuff.
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♪ ♪
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♪ ♪
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Come on, fishy, fishy.
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♪ ♪
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Nada.
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♪ ♪
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I need food.
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I don't know how far
this thing is going.
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It could go over 100 days.
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Oh, [bleep].
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There are some very
strong‐willed people here,
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people that are not going
to give up easily,
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and I cannot out‐starve
anyone.
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♪ ♪
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‐ Freshwater snails.
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It's gonna be
an interesting meal.
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Gonna have some snails.
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[munches loudly]
143
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Wow, really crunchy.
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Not much meat to speak of,
but...
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Hmm.
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Not a bad flavor.
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It reminds me a little bit
of clams...
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with a lot of grit.
[chuckles]
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♪ ♪
150
00:08:34,681 --> 00:08:36,049
I've been fishing a lot.
151
00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:38,051
I haven't been successful,
152
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and I don't wanna give up.
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So I'm gonna do a fish trap.
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I've been eating a lot
of random stuff:
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ants, crickets,
156
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lots of edibles,
but it's not enough.
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I need fish.
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♪ ♪
159
00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:02,609
All right, the funnel
that'll lead them inside.
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00:09:02,742 --> 00:09:04,411
Pretty small hole, but
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00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:07,380
those fish are pretty thin
162
00:09:07,514 --> 00:09:09,015
there in the shallows.
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I hope it works.
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00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:12,552
♪ ♪
165
00:09:12,685 --> 00:09:14,287
I'm here to win it.
166
00:09:14,421 --> 00:09:18,925
And I'm doing this for Mike.
167
00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:21,094
My husband has a brother.
168
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He has Down syndrome
169
00:09:23,696 --> 00:09:27,700
and he lives with us a month
out of the year.
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00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:29,302
When they asked me, you know,
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00:09:29,436 --> 00:09:30,837
"What would you do
with the money?"
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00:09:30,970 --> 00:09:34,140
I said,
"We would have Mike more."
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00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:38,611
$500,000, that would allow him
to live with us full‐time.
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♪ ♪
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And he's so amazing.
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He's our guy.
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Yeah, there we go.
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♪ ♪
179
00:09:49,255 --> 00:09:52,792
Feeling a little more hopeful
about fishing.
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00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:53,993
♪ ♪
181
00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:56,362
Out here, you do have to just
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00:09:56,496 --> 00:09:58,731
keep, keep trying‐‐
keep trying new things.
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00:09:58,865 --> 00:10:01,334
If it's not working,
try something else.
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00:10:01,468 --> 00:10:07,607
♪ ♪
185
00:10:07,740 --> 00:10:10,844
I feel like I can be here.
186
00:10:10,977 --> 00:10:14,681
I just need a way to get food.
187
00:10:14,814 --> 00:10:15,915
Okay.
188
00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:23,056
♪ ♪
189
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,566
‐ We got the line,
we got the lures,
190
00:10:33,700 --> 00:10:35,301
we got the stuff,
we got the me.
191
00:10:35,435 --> 00:10:38,138
Let's go, Chad!
192
00:10:38,271 --> 00:10:39,873
♪ It's time to go fishing ♪
193
00:10:40,006 --> 00:10:42,242
♪ 'Cause it's gonna be fun ♪
194
00:10:42,375 --> 00:10:44,043
♪ I'm gonna see some fishes ♪
195
00:10:44,177 --> 00:10:46,112
♪ And I'll catch everyone ♪
196
00:10:46,246 --> 00:10:47,714
♪ In my pot tonight ♪
197
00:10:47,847 --> 00:10:49,682
♪ 'Cause I'm gonna
cook you up ♪
198
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:51,684
♪ And I'm gonna catch you,
right ♪
199
00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:55,021
♪ And I'm gonna do it, what ♪
200
00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:58,491
[vocalizes]
201
00:10:58,625 --> 00:11:00,627
Oh, it's not too windy.
202
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:03,563
♪ ♪
203
00:11:03,696 --> 00:11:05,865
I'm in such a brutal area
for fishing.
204
00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:09,402
I've got one reasonably close
deep channel,
205
00:11:09,536 --> 00:11:12,839
and my strategy is lures.
206
00:11:12,972 --> 00:11:14,741
They say there's a fine line
between fishing
207
00:11:14,874 --> 00:11:17,310
and standing on the shore
like an idiot,
208
00:11:17,443 --> 00:11:20,280
so I'm gonna see
which one it is.
209
00:11:32,258 --> 00:11:36,062
Oh, oh! Oh, I had a bite.
210
00:11:36,196 --> 00:11:39,199
Oh, oh, oh! Oh, snag.
211
00:11:39,332 --> 00:11:41,834
[groans]
Please don't snag.
212
00:11:41,968 --> 00:11:45,004
[sighs]
I don't want to go in!
213
00:11:45,138 --> 00:11:47,307
But I don't wanna lose it!
214
00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,042
♪ ♪
215
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:52,345
Whew, man!
I'm sucking right now.
216
00:11:52,478 --> 00:11:59,485
♪ ♪
217
00:12:00,253 --> 00:12:02,188
Oh, it's cold.
It's cold.
218
00:12:02,322 --> 00:12:06,059
♪ ♪
219
00:12:06,192 --> 00:12:07,427
Aw, it's deep.
220
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:14,300
♪ ♪
221
00:12:14,434 --> 00:12:16,102
There we go.
I got it.
222
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:20,773
♪ ♪
223
00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:23,710
Wow.
224
00:12:23,843 --> 00:12:25,878
I'm gonna get back at it.
225
00:12:26,012 --> 00:12:27,680
I'm not gonna give up.
226
00:12:27,814 --> 00:12:28,815
I don't just need a fish.
227
00:12:28,948 --> 00:12:31,351
I need a win,
228
00:12:31,484 --> 00:12:33,319
for my mental state.
229
00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:35,521
♪ ♪
230
00:12:35,655 --> 00:12:38,291
I'm thinking about my wife
today,
231
00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:40,526
since it's her birthday.
232
00:12:40,660 --> 00:12:43,830
Just, uh, feeling it
a little bit.
233
00:12:43,963 --> 00:12:47,166
Feeling the remoteness
from my family.
234
00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:48,368
♪ ♪
235
00:12:48,501 --> 00:12:50,370
[bleep]!
236
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:53,606
From my normal life.
237
00:12:53,740 --> 00:12:56,309
feeling a little defeatist.
238
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:59,445
But remembering to stay
in the moment more.
239
00:12:59,579 --> 00:13:02,315
That's what it's gonna take
for me to win this.
240
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:05,051
♪ ♪
241
00:13:05,184 --> 00:13:07,253
Oh, yeah. Yes!
242
00:13:11,524 --> 00:13:11,791
Yeah!
243
00:13:11,924 --> 00:13:13,059
Yes!
244
00:13:16,029 --> 00:13:18,598
Oh, it's tiny.
245
00:13:18,731 --> 00:13:20,967
You are not getting away,
my friend.
246
00:13:21,067 --> 00:13:24,103
Oh, I'm gonna eat you
in a stew.
247
00:13:24,237 --> 00:13:26,105
Pretty. It's pretty.
248
00:13:26,239 --> 00:13:32,645
♪ ♪
249
00:13:32,779 --> 00:13:35,748
I'm imagining one
of the other contestants
250
00:13:35,882 --> 00:13:38,384
with a big‐ass fish,
251
00:13:38,518 --> 00:13:40,286
and here I am
252
00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:43,256
with a tiny little fifth
of a pounder.
253
00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:44,557
♪ ♪
254
00:13:44,691 --> 00:13:45,992
I mean, he's tiny.
255
00:13:46,125 --> 00:13:47,593
Let's not‐‐
let's not build this up
256
00:13:47,727 --> 00:13:49,429
to a hero kind of ordeal.
257
00:13:49,562 --> 00:13:51,464
This is no hero fish.
258
00:13:51,597 --> 00:13:55,902
♪ ♪
259
00:13:56,035 --> 00:13:58,004
All right.
Let's eat this soup.
260
00:13:58,137 --> 00:14:02,975
♪ ♪
261
00:14:03,109 --> 00:14:05,078
Roast up these bones.
262
00:14:10,316 --> 00:14:12,852
Who knew that roasted bones,
263
00:14:12,985 --> 00:14:15,054
so good?
264
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,528
Of course, I just talked
about how great that meal is,
265
00:14:22,662 --> 00:14:24,597
and I'm already, like, hungry.
266
00:14:24,731 --> 00:14:30,703
♪ ♪
267
00:14:30,837 --> 00:14:32,638
Well Chad,
268
00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:36,042
you can't win them all.
269
00:14:36,175 --> 00:14:37,977
I'm gonna do my meditation,
270
00:14:38,111 --> 00:14:39,512
'cause I think it's time.
271
00:14:39,645 --> 00:14:41,214
I think it's that time of day.
272
00:14:41,347 --> 00:14:43,716
♪ ♪
273
00:14:43,850 --> 00:14:45,418
I'm like,
274
00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:48,321
judging my whole life.
275
00:14:48,454 --> 00:14:50,323
I'm afraid that people
will look and say
276
00:14:50,456 --> 00:14:53,926
that this person
doesn't have skill level.
277
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:57,263
I mean, this is
what I do professionally.
278
00:14:57,397 --> 00:15:00,299
Like, I get paid
to teach survival skills.
279
00:15:00,433 --> 00:15:02,935
And I'm, like, out here, and
280
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:07,140
it's just been all my failures
in front of the world.
281
00:15:07,273 --> 00:15:11,177
So I'm doing these meditations
where I meet up with my wife.
282
00:15:11,310 --> 00:15:13,946
She's the one with the mental
and emotional fortitude
283
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,681
in the family.
284
00:15:15,815 --> 00:15:17,450
[inhales deeply]
285
00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:19,452
And I can feel her energy.
286
00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:23,456
I can feel her presence
strongly.
287
00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:26,325
[exhales sharply]
288
00:15:26,459 --> 00:15:28,060
I miss her bad.
289
00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:38,337
♪ ♪
290
00:15:56,389 --> 00:15:57,824
‐ There she is.
291
00:15:59,525 --> 00:16:01,194
A work of art.
292
00:16:03,496 --> 00:16:07,233
The mountain‐forged nail knife.
293
00:16:07,366 --> 00:16:08,835
Quick in the hand.
294
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:10,870
I used some snare wire.
295
00:16:11,003 --> 00:16:13,573
Fashioned a little guard,
296
00:16:13,706 --> 00:16:16,209
a little blade stop.
297
00:16:16,342 --> 00:16:19,145
Actually pretty strong 'cause
it's stainless steel wire.
298
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:21,948
Multi‐layered.
299
00:16:24,617 --> 00:16:26,352
See what you can do with a‐‐
300
00:16:26,486 --> 00:16:29,322
a rusty old nail
you find on shore.
301
00:16:31,190 --> 00:16:34,193
[imitates whooshing]
302
00:16:36,028 --> 00:16:37,930
Let's try it out real quick.
303
00:16:38,064 --> 00:16:41,400
♪ ♪
304
00:16:41,534 --> 00:16:43,469
People are either gonna like
me, or they're gonna think
305
00:16:43,603 --> 00:16:45,605
I'm the weirdest [bleep]
out there.
306
00:16:45,738 --> 00:16:49,609
♪ ♪
307
00:16:49,742 --> 00:16:50,910
All right.
308
00:16:51,043 --> 00:16:56,315
♪ ♪
309
00:16:56,449 --> 00:16:58,084
Look at that.
310
00:16:58,217 --> 00:17:02,121
I'm splitting wood with my...
311
00:17:02,255 --> 00:17:04,257
troll‐forged knife.
312
00:17:04,390 --> 00:17:06,592
That's pretty cool.
313
00:17:06,726 --> 00:17:09,395
People will be like,
"Biko sucked at getting food.
314
00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:15,101
"But man, he forged that knife
315
00:17:15,234 --> 00:17:18,204
"and he built
a pretty cool shelter, so
316
00:17:18,337 --> 00:17:20,606
he's not totally worthless."
317
00:17:20,740 --> 00:17:21,741
[chuckles]
318
00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:23,576
♪ ♪
319
00:17:23,709 --> 00:17:26,145
I definitely expected
to catch a fish by now,
320
00:17:26,279 --> 00:17:28,748
so it's been
kind of disheartening.
321
00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:31,817
And it ain't even
gotten tough yet.
322
00:17:31,951 --> 00:17:34,687
This is not an easy place
to survive.
323
00:17:34,820 --> 00:17:35,955
♪ ♪
324
00:17:36,088 --> 00:17:38,391
Got to figure out fishing.
325
00:17:38,524 --> 00:17:40,893
I'm gonna make a fish basket.
326
00:17:41,027 --> 00:17:43,496
Try it out.
It could work.
327
00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:44,764
♪ ♪
328
00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:47,867
We shall use willow.
329
00:17:47,967 --> 00:17:49,168
[nasally]
"Willow."
330
00:17:51,938 --> 00:17:53,406
What a great movie.
331
00:17:56,576 --> 00:17:58,344
"Out of the way, Peck."
332
00:18:01,547 --> 00:18:04,250
Oh, I hope
I can catch a fish soon.
333
00:18:04,383 --> 00:18:06,819
I'm gonna be sexy when
I get out of here, though.
334
00:18:06,953 --> 00:18:08,754
No more fat Biko,
335
00:18:08,888 --> 00:18:11,824
or maybe I'll be malnourished
and weak.
336
00:18:11,958 --> 00:18:17,330
♪ ♪
337
00:18:17,463 --> 00:18:19,799
I wonder how everyone's doing.
338
00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:23,269
I wonder
if anyone has tapped out.
339
00:18:23,402 --> 00:18:27,039
A bunch of grizzly bears,
not a lot of food.
340
00:18:27,173 --> 00:18:28,274
♪ ♪
341
00:18:28,407 --> 00:18:29,909
Come on, there's got
to be somebody
342
00:18:30,042 --> 00:18:32,044
who's ready to go home.
343
00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:33,379
Anyone got the time?
344
00:18:33,512 --> 00:18:37,450
Is it other contestants
tap out o'clock yet?
345
00:18:37,583 --> 00:18:39,652
I'm gonna do my best,
either way.
346
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:43,522
♪ ♪
347
00:18:43,656 --> 00:18:45,324
Damn, that's ugly.
348
00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:46,692
♪ ♪
349
00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:48,494
Oh, well.
350
00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:50,496
I don't have much care.
351
00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:52,698
♪ ♪
352
00:18:52,832 --> 00:18:53,766
[branches snap]
353
00:18:53,899 --> 00:18:55,501
[dramatic musical sting]
354
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:57,303
[water splashing]
355
00:18:57,436 --> 00:19:04,510
♪ ♪
356
00:19:05,444 --> 00:19:08,814
Holy [bleep]!
Those are bears.
357
00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:10,983
Grizzly bears.
358
00:19:11,117 --> 00:19:12,385
Go on! Get!
359
00:19:12,518 --> 00:19:14,754
♪ ♪
360
00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:17,556
Looked like a couple of cubs.
361
00:19:17,690 --> 00:19:18,624
Hey!
362
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:19,759
[air horn toots]
363
00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:26,399
♪ ♪
364
00:19:26,532 --> 00:19:28,934
Hopefully Mama's not around.
365
00:19:29,068 --> 00:19:31,470
♪ ♪
366
00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:34,006
Freakin' heart's racing.
367
00:19:34,140 --> 00:19:35,207
[exhales]
368
00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:36,909
They're a lot bigger
than I thought.
369
00:19:37,043 --> 00:19:39,679
♪ ♪
370
00:19:39,812 --> 00:19:41,881
Got my adrenaline pumping.
371
00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:44,717
♪ ♪
372
00:19:44,850 --> 00:19:46,786
I've never been anywhere
373
00:19:46,919 --> 00:19:48,621
where grizzlies exist,
374
00:19:48,754 --> 00:19:51,657
so this is a first for me.
375
00:19:51,791 --> 00:19:54,093
Knowing that these things
could cause serious harm
376
00:19:54,226 --> 00:19:57,329
to you, it's a scary thought.
377
00:19:57,463 --> 00:19:59,065
They're moving
through my area,
378
00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:01,734
and it's something that's
in the back of my head
379
00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:03,202
all the time.
380
00:20:03,335 --> 00:20:06,205
♪ ♪
381
00:20:06,338 --> 00:20:10,609
I got freakin' shoreline PTSD.
382
00:20:10,743 --> 00:20:15,014
♪ ♪
383
00:20:15,147 --> 00:20:18,517
I'm gonna go deploy
my fish trap.
384
00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:21,320
Here we go.
385
00:20:21,454 --> 00:20:24,323
Hopefully I don't run
into a grizzly.
386
00:20:24,457 --> 00:20:31,263
♪ ♪
387
00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:32,898
Even with starvation
388
00:20:33,032 --> 00:20:35,267
and grizzly bears coming
into my camp,
389
00:20:35,401 --> 00:20:37,870
I just got to keep keeping on.
390
00:20:38,003 --> 00:20:40,506
I've got a lot of weight
on me.
391
00:20:40,639 --> 00:20:43,542
But if I'm gonna stay here
a long time,
392
00:20:43,676 --> 00:20:46,145
I can't just starve
the whole time.
393
00:20:46,278 --> 00:20:47,279
♪ ♪
394
00:20:53,552 --> 00:20:55,421
I hope that as time goes on,
395
00:20:55,554 --> 00:20:58,624
as I get things more set up
and more comfortable,
396
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:02,128
that I get more bold
in food production.
397
00:21:10,035 --> 00:21:17,042
♪ ♪
398
00:21:36,862 --> 00:21:39,799
‐ I kind of wanna have
a cook shelter.
399
00:21:39,932 --> 00:21:44,036
It's a little bit of
protection for the fireplace.
400
00:21:44,170 --> 00:21:47,206
It will be better
than being out
401
00:21:47,339 --> 00:21:49,208
in the wind.
402
00:21:49,341 --> 00:21:51,343
Whew!
403
00:21:51,477 --> 00:21:55,080
[inhales deeply,
exhales sharply]
404
00:21:55,214 --> 00:21:58,450
I just feel really...
405
00:21:58,584 --> 00:22:00,986
just super weak.
406
00:22:01,120 --> 00:22:06,258
♪ ♪
407
00:22:06,392 --> 00:22:08,260
Just get some more food in me.
408
00:22:08,394 --> 00:22:09,929
Maybe that'll help.
409
00:22:10,062 --> 00:22:12,031
♪ ♪
410
00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:14,600
I'm still finding
tons of edibles,
411
00:22:14,733 --> 00:22:16,602
but you have
to eat a lot of it.
412
00:22:16,735 --> 00:22:20,372
It's just low‐calorie food
and low fat.
413
00:22:20,506 --> 00:22:22,341
♪ ♪
414
00:22:22,474 --> 00:22:24,677
Throw some...
415
00:22:24,810 --> 00:22:28,080
fireweed leaves in there.
416
00:22:28,214 --> 00:22:31,350
Hopefully, there's something
in the fish trap.
417
00:22:31,483 --> 00:22:34,486
Getting some fish soon
can give me enough energy
418
00:22:34,620 --> 00:22:36,922
to sustain me.
419
00:22:37,056 --> 00:22:38,891
I need some bigger meals
420
00:22:39,024 --> 00:22:41,360
to be able to stay out here.
421
00:22:41,493 --> 00:22:43,529
♪ ♪
422
00:22:43,662 --> 00:22:46,298
So I have a confession
to make.
423
00:22:46,432 --> 00:22:50,336
I've been so concerned
about salt, salt intake.
424
00:22:50,469 --> 00:22:52,805
Like, we need, we need
daily salt intake.
425
00:22:52,938 --> 00:22:57,343
Like, it's really critical for
all of your body functionings,
426
00:22:57,476 --> 00:23:01,447
and I don't have
the salt source,
427
00:23:01,580 --> 00:23:04,416
so I have been eating
my own mucus.
428
00:23:04,550 --> 00:23:07,219
[chuckles]
429
00:23:07,353 --> 00:23:09,788
Oh, my God.
That's so gross.
430
00:23:09,922 --> 00:23:11,624
Yeah, so when my nose runs,
431
00:23:11,757 --> 00:23:14,693
I just eat all the mucus,
432
00:23:14,827 --> 00:23:17,329
and it is very salty.
433
00:23:17,463 --> 00:23:20,866
It is much less salty
than it was at the beginning,
434
00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,435
so I know I'm depleted,
435
00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:26,906
but it kept me
from losing so much.
436
00:23:28,741 --> 00:23:31,310
I feel really guilty
for all those kids I told
437
00:23:31,443 --> 00:23:34,213
to stop picking their nose
and eating it all those‐‐
438
00:23:34,346 --> 00:23:37,116
all these years as a teacher.
439
00:23:37,249 --> 00:23:38,918
Go ahead, kids.
Eat your own mucus.
440
00:23:39,051 --> 00:23:40,219
Like‐‐
441
00:23:40,352 --> 00:23:42,688
[laughs]
442
00:23:42,821 --> 00:23:44,456
Oh, my God.
443
00:23:44,590 --> 00:23:45,758
♪ ♪
444
00:23:45,891 --> 00:23:47,893
You do a lot of
disgusting things out here
445
00:23:48,027 --> 00:23:50,162
that, like, you just
would not ever think
446
00:23:50,296 --> 00:23:51,263
that you're gonna do,
447
00:23:51,397 --> 00:23:54,266
but you're really trying
to stay
448
00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:56,435
in whatever way you can.
449
00:23:56,568 --> 00:23:57,436
♪ ♪
450
00:23:57,569 --> 00:24:00,105
I need to get food.
451
00:24:00,239 --> 00:24:03,976
For me, fishing is
the only thing
452
00:24:04,109 --> 00:24:06,478
that will sustain my tiny,
453
00:24:06,612 --> 00:24:09,014
wiry body.
454
00:24:09,148 --> 00:24:13,052
♪ ♪
455
00:24:13,185 --> 00:24:16,588
Okay, let's go down
and check our fish trap.
456
00:24:16,722 --> 00:24:18,223
♪ ♪
457
00:24:18,357 --> 00:24:20,192
I think the fish basket
458
00:24:20,326 --> 00:24:22,695
is probably my best bet.
459
00:24:22,828 --> 00:24:27,833
♪ ♪
460
00:24:29,902 --> 00:24:32,571
♪ ♪
461
00:24:49,955 --> 00:24:52,558
♪ ♪
462
00:25:08,607 --> 00:25:15,614
♪ ♪
463
00:25:19,585 --> 00:25:22,087
I don't feel like
I'm in a very...
464
00:25:22,221 --> 00:25:25,290
sustainable pattern.
465
00:25:25,424 --> 00:25:28,160
More fishing disappointment.
466
00:25:28,293 --> 00:25:31,997
I just feel like I can't win,
you know?
467
00:25:32,131 --> 00:25:33,565
[sighs]
468
00:25:33,699 --> 00:25:35,234
And then, you're
right back down again.
469
00:25:35,367 --> 00:25:37,202
Up and down.
470
00:25:37,336 --> 00:25:42,608
♪ ♪
471
00:25:42,741 --> 00:25:46,745
I don't really think of myself
as, you know, that hardcore.
472
00:25:46,879 --> 00:25:49,882
But this is hardcore.
[chuckles]
473
00:25:50,015 --> 00:25:54,053
It's a big mental
and physical challenge.
474
00:25:54,186 --> 00:25:56,889
For me, it's been
much more physical.
475
00:25:57,022 --> 00:25:59,925
Just the lack of food.
476
00:26:00,125 --> 00:26:03,128
My mind feels relatively
477
00:26:03,262 --> 00:26:04,897
strong and clear.
478
00:26:05,030 --> 00:26:09,268
♪ ♪
479
00:26:09,401 --> 00:26:12,471
This is very challenging,
you know,
480
00:26:12,604 --> 00:26:16,408
to keep going amidst setbacks.
481
00:26:16,542 --> 00:26:23,549
♪ ♪
482
00:26:39,198 --> 00:26:41,533
‐ I've got a mustache.
483
00:26:41,667 --> 00:26:43,102
It's gigantic.
484
00:26:45,637 --> 00:26:48,240
That's a mustache.
485
00:26:48,373 --> 00:26:51,009
[vocalizes]
486
00:26:51,143 --> 00:26:53,512
♪ ♪
487
00:26:53,645 --> 00:26:56,682
I don't know how to groom it.
488
00:26:56,815 --> 00:26:59,751
If I can get a handlebar...
489
00:26:59,885 --> 00:27:02,387
♪ ♪
490
00:27:02,521 --> 00:27:03,956
These guys.
491
00:27:04,089 --> 00:27:05,724
♪ ♪
492
00:27:05,858 --> 00:27:08,827
Handlebar mustache.
493
00:27:23,408 --> 00:27:28,580
♪ ♪
494
00:27:28,714 --> 00:27:32,484
I need to remedy
my sleeping situation.
495
00:27:32,618 --> 00:27:35,220
All right.
496
00:27:35,354 --> 00:27:37,122
I've had two spine surgeries,
497
00:27:37,256 --> 00:27:40,726
and sleeping on spruced boughs
and gravel
498
00:27:40,859 --> 00:27:42,227
gets kind of rough.
499
00:27:42,361 --> 00:27:44,229
Every day, I wake up,
500
00:27:44,363 --> 00:27:47,666
and my whole left thigh
is numb.
501
00:27:47,799 --> 00:27:50,169
♪ ♪
502
00:27:50,302 --> 00:27:53,438
So I'm gonna make
a suspension hammock bed,
503
00:27:53,572 --> 00:27:55,874
which takes me
completely off the ground
504
00:27:56,008 --> 00:27:58,644
using rope I found
on the beach.
505
00:27:58,777 --> 00:27:59,912
♪ ♪
506
00:28:00,112 --> 00:28:01,813
Not a lot.
507
00:28:01,947 --> 00:28:04,349
Maybe it's just
under four feet.
508
00:28:06,018 --> 00:28:09,087
What I'm gonna do
509
00:28:09,221 --> 00:28:12,624
is make a stranded
510
00:28:12,758 --> 00:28:16,595
woven bed
511
00:28:16,728 --> 00:28:18,497
using this
512
00:28:18,630 --> 00:28:22,034
as my supports.
513
00:28:24,069 --> 00:28:27,272
♪ ♪
514
00:28:27,406 --> 00:28:30,309
I don't know what box
to put myself in.
515
00:28:30,442 --> 00:28:34,279
I'm not a survivalist.
I'm not a bushcrafter.
516
00:28:34,413 --> 00:28:36,081
I'm barely a homesteader.
517
00:28:36,215 --> 00:28:38,817
I bought 40 acres
and built a house on it.
518
00:28:38,951 --> 00:28:40,686
♪ ♪
519
00:28:40,819 --> 00:28:43,055
Who thinks this is gonna work?
520
00:28:43,188 --> 00:28:44,923
♪ ♪
521
00:28:45,057 --> 00:28:47,993
I think it is.
522
00:28:48,126 --> 00:28:50,729
For me, my skill set is that
523
00:28:50,862 --> 00:28:52,598
I'm not afraid to try it
524
00:28:52,731 --> 00:28:55,434
and I'm creative
at problem solving.
525
00:28:55,567 --> 00:28:58,036
I seek out the challenge.
526
00:28:58,170 --> 00:28:59,137
[grunts]
527
00:28:59,271 --> 00:29:01,573
So if I desire
to do something,
528
00:29:01,707 --> 00:29:02,708
I just do it.
529
00:29:02,841 --> 00:29:04,743
It's just like buying 40 acres
530
00:29:04,876 --> 00:29:06,945
and being told there's
no water in those hills
531
00:29:07,079 --> 00:29:09,047
and moving your family
up there
532
00:29:09,181 --> 00:29:11,783
and digging four holes in the
earth until you find water.
533
00:29:11,917 --> 00:29:13,518
And then, I found water.
534
00:29:13,652 --> 00:29:16,622
People would usually say
that's a scary situation,
535
00:29:16,755 --> 00:29:19,291
but that's how I live my life.
536
00:29:19,424 --> 00:29:21,827
♪ ♪
537
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:25,030
I didn't grow up with a dad.
538
00:29:25,163 --> 00:29:28,400
And I learned a long time ago,
539
00:29:28,533 --> 00:29:30,135
I'm the only one
that can stop me
540
00:29:30,269 --> 00:29:32,437
from accomplishing anything.
541
00:29:32,571 --> 00:29:33,939
I am.
542
00:29:34,072 --> 00:29:41,079
♪ ♪
543
00:29:42,447 --> 00:29:45,083
So, let's test it out.
544
00:29:45,217 --> 00:29:48,020
♪ ♪
545
00:29:53,091 --> 00:29:56,094
[moaning]
546
00:29:58,330 --> 00:29:59,631
Perfect.
547
00:30:02,134 --> 00:30:04,136
This is gonna change
548
00:30:04,269 --> 00:30:07,139
my sleeping.
549
00:30:07,272 --> 00:30:08,373
Awesome.
550
00:30:10,475 --> 00:30:13,111
And I'm off the ground.
551
00:30:13,245 --> 00:30:14,946
[sighs contentedly]
552
00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:17,282
Beautiful.
553
00:30:17,416 --> 00:30:24,423
♪ ♪
554
00:30:42,708 --> 00:30:45,177
‐ So I'm totally breaking
every single safety protocol
555
00:30:45,310 --> 00:30:46,845
in my handbook.
556
00:30:46,978 --> 00:30:50,482
I'd say I'm about 40 feet up
in this spruce tree,
557
00:30:50,615 --> 00:30:53,852
But, man,
558
00:30:53,985 --> 00:30:57,489
check out this view
of the lake.
559
00:30:57,622 --> 00:30:59,458
Isn't that fantastic?
560
00:31:01,893 --> 00:31:04,663
I've been thinking
about my family a lot today.
561
00:31:04,796 --> 00:31:08,266
It's not gonna help
keep me focused in the game,
562
00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:10,268
but it's hard not to.
563
00:31:10,402 --> 00:31:13,739
I love them, and I miss them.
564
00:31:13,872 --> 00:31:20,278
♪ ♪
565
00:31:20,412 --> 00:31:23,315
I'm doing everything that
I've been trained to do,
566
00:31:23,448 --> 00:31:26,418
but I can't focus my mind
and my emotions enough.
567
00:31:26,551 --> 00:31:28,353
Let's go, Chad.
568
00:31:28,487 --> 00:31:31,256
I just need to change
my mental approach to this.
569
00:31:31,390 --> 00:31:34,326
Be here now.
570
00:31:34,459 --> 00:31:36,061
Go to the survival mind,
571
00:31:36,194 --> 00:31:37,829
'cause that survival mind
is not concerned
572
00:31:37,963 --> 00:31:39,131
with your emotions.
573
00:31:39,264 --> 00:31:40,832
It's not concerned
with your frustrations.
574
00:31:40,966 --> 00:31:42,634
It's not concerned
with your mental hurdles.
575
00:31:42,768 --> 00:31:44,069
It's only concerned with,
576
00:31:44,202 --> 00:31:46,838
what is the most important
thing to keep me alive.
577
00:31:46,972 --> 00:31:49,775
I keep feeling breezes
inside the debris hut,
578
00:31:49,908 --> 00:31:52,577
and those are gonna be
not so much fun
579
00:31:52,711 --> 00:31:55,147
when the temperature
really drops.
580
00:31:55,280 --> 00:31:57,682
Being cold is
a big calorie burn,
581
00:31:57,816 --> 00:31:59,751
and I can't afford that.
582
00:31:59,885 --> 00:32:03,989
I have the least fat
of anybody on my body.
583
00:32:04,122 --> 00:32:05,590
I don't have that much
to lose,
584
00:32:05,724 --> 00:32:07,993
and if I'm burning calories
by shivering,
585
00:32:08,126 --> 00:32:10,595
it's gonna be a bad situation.
586
00:32:10,729 --> 00:32:12,898
♪ ♪
587
00:32:13,031 --> 00:32:15,267
There's nice, soft,
588
00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:17,736
cushy grasses here.
589
00:32:17,869 --> 00:32:19,204
So I think that's gonna help
590
00:32:19,337 --> 00:32:22,441
both for water shedding
and insulation.
591
00:32:22,574 --> 00:32:25,177
♪ ♪
592
00:32:25,310 --> 00:32:26,978
Thank you, my friends.
593
00:32:29,481 --> 00:32:31,149
Thank you.
594
00:32:31,283 --> 00:32:33,118
The grasses, the mosses.
595
00:32:34,953 --> 00:32:37,489
There's no such thing
as enough debris.
596
00:32:41,259 --> 00:32:42,994
Oh, [bleep].
[hornets buzzing]
597
00:32:43,128 --> 00:32:44,129
Hornets.
598
00:32:44,262 --> 00:32:51,236
♪ ♪
599
00:32:53,405 --> 00:32:55,774
Mm‐mm, don't get me.
600
00:32:55,907 --> 00:32:57,576
Ah, [bleep]!
601
00:32:57,709 --> 00:32:59,411
Ah, [bleep].
602
00:32:59,544 --> 00:33:00,779
Whoa!
603
00:33:06,451 --> 00:33:07,419
[bleep]!
604
00:33:07,552 --> 00:33:08,620
[groans]
605
00:33:08,753 --> 00:33:09,588
[buzzing continues]
606
00:33:09,721 --> 00:33:11,756
[bleep]!
607
00:33:11,890 --> 00:33:13,925
It's the end of that.
608
00:33:14,059 --> 00:33:16,862
Little bastards got me.
609
00:33:16,995 --> 00:33:19,498
Look at them all.
610
00:33:19,631 --> 00:33:20,699
[sighs]
611
00:33:20,832 --> 00:33:22,868
♪ ♪
612
00:33:22,968 --> 00:33:25,237
Look, they're all over
my little pile here.
613
00:33:25,370 --> 00:33:28,607
♪ ♪
614
00:33:28,740 --> 00:33:31,409
Got my handful from them.
615
00:33:31,543 --> 00:33:33,745
[sighs]
Well, that sucks [bleep].
616
00:33:33,879 --> 00:33:35,714
♪ ♪
617
00:33:35,847 --> 00:33:38,717
Let's go home, Chad.
618
00:33:38,850 --> 00:33:41,253
♪ ♪
619
00:33:41,386 --> 00:33:43,755
This is
a very unique challenge.
620
00:33:43,889 --> 00:33:47,259
You can't let
the negative thoughts
621
00:33:47,392 --> 00:33:49,394
get the best of you.
622
00:33:49,528 --> 00:33:51,062
Ah, [bleep].
623
00:33:51,196 --> 00:33:58,169
♪ ♪
624
00:34:01,706 --> 00:34:04,643
Gosh, what a blessing it is
to be here.
625
00:34:04,776 --> 00:34:07,345
I mean, it's hard as [bleep].
[chuckles]
626
00:34:07,479 --> 00:34:08,847
♪ ♪
627
00:34:08,980 --> 00:34:12,217
It's hard to have failures
on television.
628
00:34:12,350 --> 00:34:14,419
It's so hard on your mind
and your emotions,
629
00:34:14,553 --> 00:34:17,055
so [bleep] hard.
630
00:34:17,188 --> 00:34:19,524
Anytime I've ever done this,
631
00:34:19,658 --> 00:34:21,693
it was for, like,
a week at a time,
632
00:34:21,826 --> 00:34:25,096
but that was, like,
planned 10 days.
633
00:34:25,230 --> 00:34:26,831
This is, like, unplanned,
634
00:34:26,965 --> 00:34:29,401
who knows how the hell long
I'll be gone
635
00:34:29,534 --> 00:34:33,271
from my family, and my life,
and blah, blah, blah.
636
00:34:33,405 --> 00:34:34,806
And I don't care.
637
00:34:34,940 --> 00:34:39,177
Anybody can judge me
all you want.
638
00:34:39,311 --> 00:34:41,746
You are not out here doing it.
639
00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:44,049
So who the hell are you
to judge?
640
00:34:44,182 --> 00:34:47,819
Just sit there and eat
your popcorn and your chips
641
00:34:47,953 --> 00:34:49,588
and get all fat
642
00:34:49,721 --> 00:34:52,123
while I'm out here starving!
643
00:34:52,257 --> 00:34:55,427
For your [bleep] entertainment!
644
00:34:55,560 --> 00:34:57,529
♪ ♪
645
00:34:57,662 --> 00:34:59,931
To entertain you.
646
00:35:00,131 --> 00:35:02,767
I'm going [bleep] crazy
out here
647
00:35:02,901 --> 00:35:05,070
to entertain you.
648
00:35:05,203 --> 00:35:07,572
What the [bleep] is that?
649
00:35:07,706 --> 00:35:10,041
[bleep].
650
00:35:10,175 --> 00:35:12,777
You're [bleep] sitting at home
eating right now!
651
00:35:12,911 --> 00:35:16,047
You're not out here.
You're not out here.
652
00:35:16,181 --> 00:35:18,249
Who the [bleep] are you
to judge?
653
00:35:18,383 --> 00:35:25,390
♪ ♪
654
00:35:38,436 --> 00:35:40,505
‐ My teeth are, like...
655
00:35:40,639 --> 00:35:45,944
♪ ♪
656
00:35:46,077 --> 00:35:49,247
Like, totally discolored.
657
00:35:49,381 --> 00:35:51,583
Like, I saw that
and I was like,
658
00:35:51,716 --> 00:35:53,785
"What the hell?"
659
00:35:53,918 --> 00:35:55,453
♪ ♪
660
00:35:55,587 --> 00:35:57,455
I don't know,
something I'm eating
661
00:35:57,589 --> 00:36:00,959
or just maybe
just the malnutrition.
662
00:36:01,092 --> 00:36:02,160
I have no idea.
663
00:36:07,298 --> 00:36:11,670
♪ ♪
664
00:36:11,803 --> 00:36:15,473
Right now,
it's really pretty dire.
665
00:36:15,607 --> 00:36:18,476
The fish trap was
really discouraging.
666
00:36:18,610 --> 00:36:20,078
♪ ♪
667
00:36:20,211 --> 00:36:22,080
Today, I might
kind of look around
668
00:36:22,213 --> 00:36:24,382
'cause I've definitely
seen some grouse.
669
00:36:24,516 --> 00:36:26,217
I need to get some food.
670
00:36:26,351 --> 00:36:27,285
♪ ♪
671
00:36:27,419 --> 00:36:28,953
And the bow.
672
00:36:31,022 --> 00:36:33,058
I feel like I need to...
673
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:35,060
cinch my pants again.
674
00:36:38,096 --> 00:36:39,431
Thank goodness for these layers
675
00:36:39,564 --> 00:36:41,599
or these pants would be
676
00:36:41,733 --> 00:36:43,368
falling right off me.
677
00:36:43,501 --> 00:36:45,403
♪ ♪
678
00:36:45,537 --> 00:36:47,872
I know that I'm under
100 pounds at this point
679
00:36:48,006 --> 00:36:50,208
and I know that this is
dangerous territory.
680
00:36:50,341 --> 00:36:51,543
Okay.
681
00:36:51,676 --> 00:36:53,878
Despite eating as much
as I possibly can
682
00:36:54,012 --> 00:36:56,281
of a variety of weird [bleep],
683
00:36:56,414 --> 00:37:00,151
I'm trying my hardest to get
as many things into my body
684
00:37:00,285 --> 00:37:03,621
as possible,
and it's not working.
685
00:37:03,755 --> 00:37:05,390
If I can't get food,
686
00:37:05,523 --> 00:37:08,326
then I can't‐‐
I can't be here.
687
00:37:08,460 --> 00:37:11,262
♪ ♪
688
00:37:11,396 --> 00:37:14,365
Take it easy.
689
00:37:14,499 --> 00:37:16,334
I need to move quickly.
690
00:37:16,468 --> 00:37:19,237
♪ ♪
691
00:37:19,370 --> 00:37:20,672
Grouse.
692
00:37:20,805 --> 00:37:23,575
I've seen the scat
a couple of different times,
693
00:37:23,708 --> 00:37:28,546
and they are near
my living area.
694
00:37:34,085 --> 00:37:37,822
Let's just sit and listen
for a while.
695
00:37:37,956 --> 00:37:39,958
Oh, wow.
696
00:37:40,091 --> 00:37:41,226
♪ ♪
697
00:37:41,359 --> 00:37:44,596
I'm just too skinny.
698
00:37:44,729 --> 00:37:47,232
I was afraid
that losing weight,
699
00:37:47,365 --> 00:37:50,702
it might, like, bring up stuff
from when I was young.
700
00:37:50,835 --> 00:37:52,537
I had an eating disorder
for years,
701
00:37:52,670 --> 00:37:55,340
and looking back,
702
00:37:55,473 --> 00:37:57,742
it's so disturbing,
703
00:37:57,876 --> 00:38:01,012
you know,
that punishment of self.
704
00:38:01,146 --> 00:38:02,247
♪ ♪
705
00:38:02,380 --> 00:38:03,915
I was plagued
706
00:38:04,048 --> 00:38:07,619
with horrible thoughts
about myself.
707
00:38:07,752 --> 00:38:10,155
I don't think
anybody deserves that.
708
00:38:10,288 --> 00:38:12,423
♪ ♪
709
00:38:12,557 --> 00:38:14,259
I'm just so glad
710
00:38:14,392 --> 00:38:17,462
to have made that shift
years ago
711
00:38:17,595 --> 00:38:20,732
into a different way of being
and thinking.
712
00:38:20,865 --> 00:38:22,200
♪ ♪
713
00:38:22,333 --> 00:38:24,536
I think it's become
a lot more important for me
714
00:38:24,669 --> 00:38:26,905
to be healthy and strong.
715
00:38:27,038 --> 00:38:28,473
♪ ♪
716
00:38:28,606 --> 00:38:30,375
I'm gonna head back.
717
00:38:30,508 --> 00:38:32,677
♪ ♪
718
00:38:32,811 --> 00:38:35,780
You know, this body is
all we have.
719
00:38:35,914 --> 00:38:37,816
So I think there's a level
for us all
720
00:38:37,949 --> 00:38:40,985
of, you know, willingness
to push ourselves,
721
00:38:41,119 --> 00:38:43,288
and, for me,
722
00:38:43,421 --> 00:38:45,423
I'm not going to push myself
723
00:38:45,557 --> 00:38:49,127
into any more of a danger zone
than I'm already in.
724
00:38:49,260 --> 00:38:51,763
♪ ♪
725
00:39:29,701 --> 00:39:35,273
♪ ♪
726
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:43,081
[dramatic music]
727
00:39:43,214 --> 00:39:50,221
♪ ♪
728
00:40:32,597 --> 00:40:34,232
[exhales slowly]
729
00:40:57,188 --> 00:40:59,157
[exhales sharply]
Okay.
730
00:40:59,290 --> 00:41:02,327
♪ ♪
731
00:41:02,460 --> 00:41:05,363
I start having
these chest pains.
732
00:41:05,496 --> 00:41:07,966
Oh, boy.
733
00:41:08,099 --> 00:41:11,569
No amount of glory is worth
harming yourself
734
00:41:11,703 --> 00:41:14,939
to the level
that starvation can do.
735
00:41:21,913 --> 00:41:23,081
[sighs]
736
00:41:27,885 --> 00:41:30,655
I think this is enough.
737
00:41:30,788 --> 00:41:33,791
[Yellowbrick buttons beeping]
738
00:41:36,394 --> 00:41:38,262
I am officially tapping out.
739
00:41:38,396 --> 00:41:44,502
♪ ♪
740
00:41:44,635 --> 00:41:46,704
I made a moral decision
741
00:41:46,838 --> 00:41:48,740
for my health and my future
742
00:41:48,873 --> 00:41:51,809
that I have no trouble making.
743
00:41:51,943 --> 00:41:55,513
But there's intense grief
with the loss of‐‐
744
00:41:55,646 --> 00:41:56,914
of what could have been.
745
00:41:57,048 --> 00:41:58,483
♪ ♪
746
00:41:58,616 --> 00:42:01,185
A picture of my guys.
747
00:42:01,319 --> 00:42:05,790
There was the hope we'd have
the money to have Mike, but...
748
00:42:05,923 --> 00:42:08,793
♪ ♪
749
00:42:08,926 --> 00:42:11,596
[sighs]
It's okay.
750
00:42:11,729 --> 00:42:13,164
I love you guys.
751
00:42:13,297 --> 00:42:16,734
♪ ♪
752
00:42:16,868 --> 00:42:18,936
I'm coming home to you, honey.
753
00:42:19,070 --> 00:42:22,673
♪ ♪
754
00:42:25,176 --> 00:42:32,183
♪ ♪
755
00:42:37,021 --> 00:42:39,223
‐ Hi, Michelle.
What's going on?
756
00:42:39,357 --> 00:42:41,592
‐ Well...
757
00:42:41,726 --> 00:42:44,028
I've been pretty beat up
by this place.
758
00:42:44,162 --> 00:42:46,664
[chuckles]
759
00:42:46,798 --> 00:42:49,967
I just can't procure
enough food.
760
00:42:50,068 --> 00:42:52,203
The hardest thing
about leaving this space,
761
00:42:52,336 --> 00:42:56,340
I think, is the "what
could have been," you know?
762
00:42:56,474 --> 00:42:58,609
If you had made
different choices,
763
00:42:58,743 --> 00:43:02,146
maybe things would have aligned
in a different way.
764
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:05,283
But in terms of the experiences
I've had,
765
00:43:05,416 --> 00:43:08,086
I feel really good about them.
766
00:43:08,219 --> 00:43:10,655
I feel like
I'm taking a lot of...
767
00:43:10,788 --> 00:43:12,557
magic and heart with me.
768
00:43:12,690 --> 00:43:16,260
♪ ♪
769
00:43:16,394 --> 00:43:18,229
I took myself to a point
770
00:43:18,362 --> 00:43:22,733
where any further,
and this could be really bad.
771
00:43:22,867 --> 00:43:25,803
I know what it's like
to lose your health.
772
00:43:25,937 --> 00:43:29,707
When I was young, it affected
every part of my life
773
00:43:29,841 --> 00:43:32,543
and the quality of my life.
774
00:43:32,677 --> 00:43:35,813
I felt like I was too far gone
775
00:43:35,947 --> 00:43:40,618
to pull myself back up
into functionality.
776
00:43:40,751 --> 00:43:42,687
Having a strong,
healthy body is
777
00:43:42,820 --> 00:43:46,357
one of the greatest gifts that
you can have in this life.
778
00:43:46,491 --> 00:43:53,498
♪ ♪
779
00:44:07,845 --> 00:44:10,014
‐ ♪ A‐bow hunting,
we shall go ♪
780
00:44:10,148 --> 00:44:13,351
♪ A‐bow hunting, we shall go ♪
781
00:44:13,484 --> 00:44:15,620
I think am on
to something there.
782
00:44:15,753 --> 00:44:17,989
I might develop that
a little more.
783
00:44:21,993 --> 00:44:24,195
All right.
784
00:44:24,328 --> 00:44:25,463
Wish me luck.
785
00:44:27,098 --> 00:44:29,000
♪ ♪
786
00:44:29,133 --> 00:44:31,369
It's so frustrating
787
00:44:31,502 --> 00:44:35,373
to not be able
to catch a fish,
788
00:44:35,506 --> 00:44:39,477
and so, I feel like
I need to focus on hunting.
789
00:44:39,610 --> 00:44:42,613
That's really the only option
I have right now.
790
00:44:42,747 --> 00:44:44,282
♪ ♪
791
00:44:44,415 --> 00:44:47,919
This style of hunting
that I like is
792
00:44:48,052 --> 00:44:49,187
a method of still hunting,
793
00:44:49,320 --> 00:44:51,956
where you move
through the woods
794
00:44:52,089 --> 00:44:53,791
very, very slowly.
795
00:44:53,925 --> 00:44:55,526
♪ ♪
796
00:44:55,660 --> 00:44:58,162
A large portion of the time,
you're just stopped
797
00:44:58,296 --> 00:45:01,165
and you're looking and you're
listening for wildlife.
798
00:45:07,572 --> 00:45:11,209
The littlest noise can mean
799
00:45:11,342 --> 00:45:12,810
the presence of an animal.
800
00:45:12,944 --> 00:45:15,947
[birds chirping]
801
00:45:21,285 --> 00:45:24,188
The key is total awareness.
802
00:45:25,957 --> 00:45:29,393
You have to be very present
803
00:45:29,527 --> 00:45:31,429
and calm,
804
00:45:31,562 --> 00:45:33,965
because if you have
other things on your mind,
805
00:45:34,098 --> 00:45:35,099
you're not there.
806
00:45:35,233 --> 00:45:36,767
You're not present.
807
00:45:48,145 --> 00:45:51,415
♪ ♪
808
00:45:53,684 --> 00:45:55,253
♪ ♪
809
00:46:04,295 --> 00:46:06,897
♪ ♪
810
00:46:50,675 --> 00:46:51,842
[thrums]
811
00:46:54,912 --> 00:46:57,648
♪ ♪
812
00:46:57,782 --> 00:47:00,051
Well, that's awesome.
813
00:47:00,184 --> 00:47:02,753
Some fresh deer sign.
814
00:47:02,887 --> 00:47:04,555
That gives me a little bit
of confidence
815
00:47:04,689 --> 00:47:07,291
that we're gonna have
some deer here.
816
00:47:07,425 --> 00:47:09,193
I've been struggling
a little bit.
817
00:47:09,327 --> 00:47:11,062
That gives me something
to look forward to,
818
00:47:11,195 --> 00:47:14,365
which is exactly
what I needed.
819
00:47:14,498 --> 00:47:16,834
Maybe, you know,
I got a chance
820
00:47:16,967 --> 00:47:19,570
to put a deer down.
821
00:47:19,704 --> 00:47:21,439
That's good. That's...
822
00:47:21,572 --> 00:47:22,940
That's really good.
823
00:47:23,074 --> 00:47:24,709
♪ ♪
824
00:47:28,946 --> 00:47:31,248
[dramatic music]
825
00:47:31,382 --> 00:47:38,389
♪ ♪
826
00:47:52,470 --> 00:47:53,537
‐ Whoo.
827
00:47:56,340 --> 00:47:59,510
I'm feeling
kind of ragged today.
828
00:47:59,643 --> 00:48:01,345
A little worn.
829
00:48:01,479 --> 00:48:05,383
Overall, kind of
rundown physically.
830
00:48:05,516 --> 00:48:07,718
I need to step up
my food‐gathering game,
831
00:48:07,852 --> 00:48:10,154
so maybe instead of an hour
of grasses,
832
00:48:10,287 --> 00:48:12,289
I'll go fishing.
833
00:48:12,423 --> 00:48:14,458
I gotta get catching.
I gotta...
834
00:48:14,592 --> 00:48:16,761
I gotta turn my luck around.
835
00:48:16,894 --> 00:48:18,896
I need the food.
I just need the food.
836
00:48:19,029 --> 00:48:20,698
That's all there is to it.
837
00:48:20,831 --> 00:48:27,805
♪ ♪
838
00:48:29,140 --> 00:48:30,841
So much crap to carry, Chad.
839
00:48:30,975 --> 00:48:35,045
So much crap to carry,
including you.
840
00:48:35,179 --> 00:48:36,914
My trusty sidekick.
841
00:48:37,047 --> 00:48:38,249
♪ ♪
842
00:48:38,382 --> 00:48:40,618
My famous maker.
843
00:48:40,751 --> 00:48:43,187
At this rate, you'll be
my infamous maker.
844
00:48:43,320 --> 00:48:45,322
♪ ♪
845
00:48:45,456 --> 00:48:47,024
I'm not living up to
846
00:48:47,158 --> 00:48:50,060
what I want to live up to
as a survivalist.
847
00:48:50,194 --> 00:48:52,663
It's important to me, Chad.
848
00:48:52,797 --> 00:48:54,331
It's super important to me.
849
00:48:54,465 --> 00:48:56,667
You just don't understand,
do you?
850
00:48:56,801 --> 00:48:57,802
How could you?
851
00:48:57,935 --> 00:48:59,937
You're just
an inanimate damn object.
852
00:49:00,137 --> 00:49:01,238
♪ ♪
853
00:49:01,372 --> 00:49:02,840
I'm trying.
854
00:49:02,973 --> 00:49:06,076
I'm doing everything
that I've been trained to do,
855
00:49:06,210 --> 00:49:10,514
but my awareness is not
where it needs to be
856
00:49:10,648 --> 00:49:13,083
personally, for me,
to be successful.
857
00:49:13,217 --> 00:49:15,085
♪ ♪
858
00:49:15,219 --> 00:49:16,954
Just started realizing that
859
00:49:17,087 --> 00:49:20,791
over the last 13 years now,
860
00:49:20,925 --> 00:49:22,126
I've had my wife
861
00:49:22,259 --> 00:49:25,896
to help keep me focused
on the right things.
862
00:49:28,732 --> 00:49:32,203
So I'm gonna sing my song,
my wife's song.
863
00:49:32,336 --> 00:49:33,637
Why not?
864
00:49:40,311 --> 00:49:44,215
♪ Ring ring goes
the dinner bell ♪
865
00:49:44,348 --> 00:49:48,118
♪ All of mama's children come
a‐running up ♪
866
00:49:48,252 --> 00:49:50,821
♪ From the gut ♪
867
00:49:50,955 --> 00:49:51,956
♪ To what she's put ♪
868
00:49:52,089 --> 00:49:56,861
♪ On the table ♪
869
00:49:56,994 --> 00:50:00,331
Come on.
Catch a big boy.
870
00:50:00,464 --> 00:50:02,132
♪ Coal's still hot ♪
871
00:50:02,266 --> 00:50:04,702
♪ And the sweet smell
of wood smoke ♪
872
00:50:04,835 --> 00:50:06,537
♪ The three stones she uses ♪
873
00:50:06,670 --> 00:50:11,442
♪ And the wood spoon
made from oak ♪
874
00:50:11,575 --> 00:50:14,445
♪ Daddy gets the firewood ♪
875
00:50:14,578 --> 00:50:20,384
♪ ♪
876
00:50:20,518 --> 00:50:23,854
♪ He washes off
in a cool gut stream ♪
877
00:50:23,988 --> 00:50:27,191
♪ After climbing
a coconut tree ♪
878
00:50:27,324 --> 00:50:30,895
♪ For his family ♪
879
00:50:31,028 --> 00:50:33,130
♪ Oh, what a sight to see ♪
880
00:50:33,264 --> 00:50:36,133
♪ As he returns triumphantly ♪
881
00:50:36,267 --> 00:50:39,003
♪ ♪
882
00:50:42,106 --> 00:50:44,975
[chuckles]
883
00:50:51,315 --> 00:50:55,252
[sighs]
Okay, that's it. Done.
884
00:50:55,386 --> 00:50:56,754
♪ ♪
885
00:50:56,887 --> 00:50:58,956
I've been gone for weeks now.
886
00:50:59,089 --> 00:51:01,825
And what the hell,
I got a beautiful,
887
00:51:01,959 --> 00:51:04,228
amazing family.
888
00:51:04,361 --> 00:51:05,496
♪ ♪
889
00:51:05,629 --> 00:51:07,798
That's more important in life
890
00:51:07,932 --> 00:51:10,234
than winning a competition.
891
00:51:10,367 --> 00:51:13,203
And they are not
gonna judge me.
892
00:51:13,337 --> 00:51:15,205
So, go ahead.
893
00:51:15,339 --> 00:51:16,740
Judge me all you want.
894
00:51:16,874 --> 00:51:19,577
I'm ready for it.
895
00:51:19,710 --> 00:51:21,979
[Yellowbrick buttons beeping]
896
00:51:22,112 --> 00:51:23,581
Good morning.
This is Matt.
897
00:51:25,516 --> 00:51:28,485
I am officially tapping out.
898
00:51:28,619 --> 00:51:32,656
♪ ♪
899
00:51:32,790 --> 00:51:35,225
Oh, Chad.
900
00:51:35,359 --> 00:51:37,695
It was hard.
It was hard.
901
00:51:37,828 --> 00:51:39,530
But you know what?
902
00:51:39,663 --> 00:51:42,066
Family, friends,
903
00:51:42,199 --> 00:51:46,437
the people around us is
more important than my ego.
904
00:51:46,570 --> 00:51:48,505
And I think this
905
00:51:48,639 --> 00:51:51,308
has made me a better person.
906
00:51:51,442 --> 00:51:54,478
As hard as it is
professionally to quit...
907
00:51:54,612 --> 00:51:57,481
Here they come, Chadical.
908
00:51:57,615 --> 00:51:59,416
It doesn't make me a failure.
909
00:51:59,550 --> 00:52:01,251
It's just a failure.
910
00:52:01,385 --> 00:52:03,220
And that's a huge difference
right there.
911
00:52:03,354 --> 00:52:05,990
I've never allowed that
for myself.
912
00:52:06,123 --> 00:52:10,294
This is the end of our time
together, Chadster.
913
00:52:10,427 --> 00:52:12,630
I will miss you.
914
00:52:12,763 --> 00:52:14,565
I will totally miss you.
915
00:52:16,967 --> 00:52:18,636
I'm ready to go.
916
00:52:18,769 --> 00:52:21,805
Yeah, I mean, I had
an amazing experience.
917
00:52:21,939 --> 00:52:25,142
And I realized that
I wasn't happy being alone
918
00:52:25,275 --> 00:52:26,543
and I didn't wanna fight it.
919
00:52:26,677 --> 00:52:29,480
I totally miss my family.
920
00:52:29,613 --> 00:52:31,382
I totally miss my friends.
921
00:52:31,515 --> 00:52:33,984
I totally miss my life.
I miss all of that.
922
00:52:34,118 --> 00:52:35,953
And if people I want
to call it a failure,
923
00:52:36,086 --> 00:52:38,055
then I accept that failure.
924
00:52:38,188 --> 00:52:40,357
I don't wanna be driven
by the fear of judgment.
925
00:52:40,491 --> 00:52:42,259
I wanna be driven
by what's in my heart.
926
00:52:42,393 --> 00:52:47,598
♪ ♪
927
00:52:47,731 --> 00:52:49,767
My ideals
928
00:52:49,900 --> 00:52:52,202
have not matched my heart
929
00:52:52,336 --> 00:52:54,872
for years now.
930
00:52:55,005 --> 00:52:57,074
My ideals say
931
00:52:57,207 --> 00:53:00,377
that the solo survivalist is
932
00:53:00,511 --> 00:53:03,313
the ultimate
of the survivalists.
933
00:53:03,447 --> 00:53:05,049
♪ ♪
934
00:53:05,182 --> 00:53:08,185
But now, I'm realizing
935
00:53:08,318 --> 00:53:09,953
that that's [bleep].
936
00:53:10,087 --> 00:53:11,355
♪ ♪
937
00:53:11,488 --> 00:53:15,793
This ultimate survivalist
dies alone.
938
00:53:15,926 --> 00:53:17,761
When he passes on,
939
00:53:17,895 --> 00:53:20,364
his kids are alone.
940
00:53:20,497 --> 00:53:22,733
♪ ♪
941
00:53:22,866 --> 00:53:25,502
And even deeper than that,
942
00:53:25,636 --> 00:53:28,672
I realized that family
943
00:53:28,806 --> 00:53:31,575
is more important
944
00:53:31,709 --> 00:53:33,610
than anything else.
945
00:53:33,744 --> 00:53:40,751
♪ ♪
946
00:53:59,436 --> 00:54:02,206
‐ Well, let's see
if we can catch something.
947
00:54:04,975 --> 00:54:08,011
Jacket make too much noise
in the bushes.
948
00:54:12,783 --> 00:54:14,918
In case I happen to see one
of the three deer
949
00:54:15,052 --> 00:54:16,754
that's around here.
950
00:54:18,756 --> 00:54:20,090
Maybe two deer.
951
00:54:22,326 --> 00:54:23,994
They ain't many.
952
00:54:24,128 --> 00:54:26,497
That's for sure.
953
00:54:26,630 --> 00:54:31,168
♪ ♪
954
00:54:31,301 --> 00:54:33,403
I found one little ridge
955
00:54:33,537 --> 00:54:36,039
where I can access that patch
956
00:54:36,173 --> 00:54:39,676
where I was finding that fresh
deer sign yesterday evening.
957
00:54:39,810 --> 00:54:43,013
♪ ♪
958
00:54:43,147 --> 00:54:44,715
I tell you, things that
959
00:54:44,848 --> 00:54:47,184
normally I wouldn't even
960
00:54:47,317 --> 00:54:49,386
take a second glance
961
00:54:49,520 --> 00:54:51,155
kind of wear you out
962
00:54:51,288 --> 00:54:53,791
when you're not eating
every day.
963
00:54:53,924 --> 00:55:00,998
♪ ♪
964
00:55:05,402 --> 00:55:08,839
I'm seeing more fresh sign
in here.
965
00:55:08,972 --> 00:55:15,979
♪ ♪
966
00:55:24,087 --> 00:55:31,028
♪ ♪
967
00:55:31,895 --> 00:55:34,898
[growling]
968
00:55:36,366 --> 00:55:43,340
♪ ♪
969
00:56:46,603 --> 00:56:48,906
[dramatic music]
970
00:56:49,039 --> 00:56:56,046
♪ ♪
971
00:56:58,348 --> 00:57:00,083
‐ Michelle, thanks
for being here with me.
972
00:57:00,217 --> 00:57:01,318
‐ Thanks for having me.
973
00:57:01,451 --> 00:57:02,886
‐ Everybody who's been
on "Alone"
974
00:57:03,020 --> 00:57:04,688
knows what it's like
to lose a lot of weight.
975
00:57:04,821 --> 00:57:07,157
When did you realize
you were nearing the end?
976
00:57:07,291 --> 00:57:08,458
‐ You know,
you look at your hands,
977
00:57:08,592 --> 00:57:09,793
and you don't recognize them.
978
00:57:09,927 --> 00:57:12,162
And your body becomes
a fearful thing.
979
00:57:12,296 --> 00:57:14,131
You notice
you're losing weight,
980
00:57:14,264 --> 00:57:15,699
but you're wearing
so many clothes
981
00:57:15,832 --> 00:57:18,635
that you can kind of mask that
for a while.
982
00:57:18,769 --> 00:57:21,305
And then, you see yourself
without clothes on,
983
00:57:21,438 --> 00:57:22,873
and it's like‐‐
[gasps]
984
00:57:23,006 --> 00:57:24,541
I kind of washed myself,
985
00:57:24,675 --> 00:57:28,545
and that's when I looked
at my body and went...
986
00:57:28,679 --> 00:57:30,514
Yikes.
987
00:57:30,647 --> 00:57:33,583
My mouth filled with
this sweet saliva taste
988
00:57:33,717 --> 00:57:35,085
four days prior to me tapping,
989
00:57:35,218 --> 00:57:37,220
and that's basically ketosis‐‐
990
00:57:37,354 --> 00:57:40,857
when your body's eating
whatever reserves it has‐‐
991
00:57:40,991 --> 00:57:43,860
so I knew‐‐I knew things
were going downhill.
992
00:57:43,994 --> 00:57:46,063
My inability to procure fish
993
00:57:46,196 --> 00:57:49,299
was what led to me
having to tap.
994
00:57:49,433 --> 00:57:51,034
‐ Let's talk about
your food gathering.
995
00:57:51,168 --> 00:57:53,103
In a survival situation,
you have to be willing
996
00:57:53,236 --> 00:57:56,640
to eat anything that other
people will not consider doing.
997
00:57:56,773 --> 00:57:59,743
You were eating
ants, crickets, snails.
998
00:57:59,876 --> 00:58:01,445
‐ I ate whatever I could.
999
00:58:01,578 --> 00:58:04,381
But I found a little bit
of a fish carcass
1000
00:58:04,514 --> 00:58:06,316
along this trail.
1001
00:58:06,450 --> 00:58:09,586
I gathered whatever I could
find that I knew is edible,
1002
00:58:09,720 --> 00:58:11,955
and even maybe
some things that
1003
00:58:12,089 --> 00:58:14,057
are on the questionable side.
1004
00:58:16,593 --> 00:58:19,763
I wanted to get as much
varied nutrition as I could,
1005
00:58:19,896 --> 00:58:22,265
so I was definitely
pushing that envelope
1006
00:58:22,399 --> 00:58:23,800
of just trying anything
I could eat.
1007
00:58:23,934 --> 00:58:25,202
Mmm.
1008
00:58:25,335 --> 00:58:27,904
‐ You used the cow parsnip
stalk to blow on your fire.
1009
00:58:28,038 --> 00:58:30,507
But cow parsnip can give people
an allergic reaction.
1010
00:58:30,640 --> 00:58:31,775
What happened?
1011
00:58:31,908 --> 00:58:33,977
‐ I'm still not certain
exactly what it was
1012
00:58:34,111 --> 00:58:35,412
that was causing my illness,
1013
00:58:35,545 --> 00:58:37,814
but I did feel that
there was a connection
1014
00:58:37,948 --> 00:58:41,084
between the stalk
and the bouts of nausea
1015
00:58:41,218 --> 00:58:42,386
and pain I was having.
1016
00:58:43,987 --> 00:58:46,390
And so, when I was
putting that together,
1017
00:58:46,523 --> 00:58:48,959
I thought, "Ooh, this‐‐
maybe this isn't cow parsnip.
1018
00:58:49,092 --> 00:58:51,395
Maybe I hadn't
identified it correctly."
1019
00:58:51,528 --> 00:58:52,896
Wow.
1020
00:58:53,030 --> 00:58:55,665
Water hemlock and cow parsnip
looked very similar
1021
00:58:55,799 --> 00:58:57,300
in their dead phases.
1022
00:58:57,434 --> 00:58:58,835
So then, I got
very concerned that
1023
00:58:58,969 --> 00:59:01,571
maybe I had poisoned
myself with water hemlock.
1024
00:59:01,705 --> 00:59:06,009
I'm worried that the tube
1025
00:59:06,143 --> 00:59:10,614
is, um, not cow parsnip.
1026
00:59:10,747 --> 00:59:13,183
‐ What was that like
being so sick and alone?
1027
00:59:13,316 --> 00:59:15,218
‐ I've spent a lot of time
in the wilderness by myself,
1028
00:59:15,352 --> 00:59:18,088
and honestly, that was
one of the scariest times
1029
00:59:18,221 --> 00:59:21,091
because I wasn't certain
what was going on.
1030
00:59:21,224 --> 00:59:25,262
I had another just
intense wave of...
1031
00:59:25,395 --> 00:59:27,998
nausea.
1032
00:59:28,131 --> 00:59:30,267
I really had some panic
1033
00:59:30,400 --> 00:59:31,635
because I thought,
"Oh, my gosh,
1034
00:59:31,768 --> 00:59:34,004
"I'm so far
from nearest hospital.
1035
00:59:34,137 --> 00:59:36,573
I could be
in deep trouble here."
1036
00:59:36,706 --> 00:59:38,341
I'm just gonna sit
for a second.
1037
00:59:38,475 --> 00:59:40,644
[exhales]
1038
00:59:40,777 --> 00:59:41,978
And there were moments where
1039
00:59:42,112 --> 00:59:44,581
I was just holding
the Yellowbrick,
1040
00:59:44,714 --> 00:59:46,183
ready to push that button
1041
00:59:46,316 --> 00:59:47,984
in the event
of things getting worse.
1042
00:59:48,118 --> 00:59:49,853
And I came through
the other side, luckily.
1043
00:59:49,986 --> 00:59:51,721
‐ Yeah, you did.
‐ [chuckles]
1044
00:59:51,855 --> 00:59:53,690
‐ Your bear experience
was epic.
1045
00:59:53,824 --> 00:59:57,094
There you were on the beach
calmly eating rose hips,
1046
00:59:57,227 --> 01:00:00,764
and this big, beautiful bear
comes swimming at you.
1047
01:00:00,897 --> 01:00:03,934
‐ No freakin' way.
1048
01:00:04,034 --> 01:00:05,902
It was again one
of those kind of surreal,
1049
01:00:06,036 --> 01:00:07,604
like, shocking moments.
1050
01:00:07,737 --> 01:00:10,173
And, you know, minding my
own business, eating rose hips,
1051
01:00:10,307 --> 01:00:11,875
and all of a sudden,
I'm like, "Oh, my gosh.
1052
01:00:12,008 --> 01:00:13,076
There's a bear right there."
1053
01:00:13,210 --> 01:00:17,080
It's gonna dock up
into brush in here.
1054
01:00:17,214 --> 01:00:20,550
And then, I'm like, "Okay,
how do I feet out of here?"
1055
01:00:20,684 --> 01:00:23,753
You know, get, you know,
with all my gear and my stuff.
1056
01:00:23,887 --> 01:00:25,489
And so, I was able to do that
1057
01:00:25,622 --> 01:00:27,357
to kind of just
let him continue,
1058
01:00:27,491 --> 01:00:29,159
and then he caught a fish
right then.
1059
01:00:29,292 --> 01:00:32,295
He's got a freaking
giant fish in his mouth.
1060
01:00:32,429 --> 01:00:34,197
‐ You must have just wanted
to rush out there
1061
01:00:34,331 --> 01:00:36,766
and grab that thing
right out of his mouth.
1062
01:00:36,900 --> 01:00:38,268
‐ I went and got my pot
1063
01:00:38,401 --> 01:00:41,004
and followed him,
hoping for scraps.
1064
01:00:41,138 --> 01:00:43,373
‐ You were like a raven
walking behind him.
1065
01:00:43,507 --> 01:00:44,508
[both laugh]
1066
01:00:44,641 --> 01:00:46,076
‐ Absolutely.
1067
01:00:46,209 --> 01:00:47,878
But he left me nothing.
‐ Aw.
1068
01:00:48,011 --> 01:00:50,180
I can't imagine how you felt
in that moment.
1069
01:00:50,313 --> 01:00:51,581
‐ Super disappointed.
1070
01:00:51,715 --> 01:00:53,283
I was like‐‐really thought
1071
01:00:53,416 --> 01:00:55,719
I was gonna get some
nice chunks of fish,
1072
01:00:55,852 --> 01:00:59,055
so...yeah.
1073
01:00:59,189 --> 01:01:02,792
‐ What will you remember most
about this beautiful place?
1074
01:01:02,926 --> 01:01:05,962
‐ Aw, the beauty,
the promise of each day.
1075
01:01:06,096 --> 01:01:08,465
It's just
an extra ordinary gift,
1076
01:01:08,598 --> 01:01:10,567
and every single day
I was out there,
1077
01:01:10,700 --> 01:01:13,069
I felt like the luckiest person
in the world.
1078
01:01:13,203 --> 01:01:15,305
I believe we carry the stories
1079
01:01:15,438 --> 01:01:17,040
that we've lived with us,
1080
01:01:17,174 --> 01:01:18,642
but we also carry the places.
1081
01:01:18,775 --> 01:01:20,377
They have this impact on us,
1082
01:01:20,510 --> 01:01:22,445
and, you know,
that changes you,
1083
01:01:22,579 --> 01:01:24,681
and it's with you forever.
1084
01:01:24,814 --> 01:01:27,117
‐ Michelle, thanks so much
for sharing your story.
1085
01:01:27,250 --> 01:01:28,852
It was a pleasure to meet you.
1086
01:01:28,985 --> 01:01:30,453
‐ So nice to meet you too,
Nikki.
1087
01:01:30,587 --> 01:01:32,556
♪ ♪
1088
01:01:32,689 --> 01:01:34,524
‐ Now, I have the shakes.
1089
01:01:34,658 --> 01:01:36,726
I'm feeling nauseous.
[groans]
1090
01:01:36,860 --> 01:01:39,229
[retches]
1091
01:01:39,362 --> 01:01:40,931
‐ It's pulling all the air in
from over there,
1092
01:01:41,064 --> 01:01:43,433
just bringing the smoke inside.
1093
01:01:43,567 --> 01:01:46,536
I'm gonna end up
asphyxiating myself tonight.
1094
01:01:46,670 --> 01:01:48,905
‐ Something has been here.
1095
01:01:49,039 --> 01:01:50,407
It tore up my fire pit.
1096
01:01:50,540 --> 01:01:52,108
[bear growling]
Hey, bear.
1097
01:01:52,242 --> 01:01:54,678
‐ Let's read
my personal rules list.
1098
01:01:54,811 --> 01:01:56,713
Don't push the tap button.
1099
01:01:58,582 --> 01:02:00,917
♪ ♪