1 00:00:01,490 --> 00:00:04,386 [upbeat rock music] 2 00:00:04,386 --> 00:00:09,490 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:09,490 --> 00:00:10,973 [school bell ringing] - All right, team. 4 00:00:10,973 --> 00:00:13,731 We need a story that's gonna top last week's feature, 5 00:00:13,731 --> 00:00:15,869 "Water Fountain Etiquette with Clyde." 6 00:00:15,869 --> 00:00:17,249 Any suggestions? 7 00:00:17,249 --> 00:00:19,386 all: Hmm. - Ooh, I've got one--me! 8 00:00:19,386 --> 00:00:22,352 [sighs] No, we're not doing another piece 9 00:00:22,352 --> 00:00:24,111 on your ab routine, Rusty. 10 00:00:24,111 --> 00:00:26,800 Yeah, we're still sifting through the complaint letters. 11 00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:28,214 Say what you want. 12 00:00:28,214 --> 00:00:29,904 There's one name on everybody's lips. 13 00:00:29,904 --> 00:00:31,904 [device beeping] 14 00:00:31,904 --> 00:00:34,938 [gasps] My extraterrestrial life detector. 15 00:00:34,938 --> 00:00:37,318 An alien must be close. 16 00:00:38,455 --> 00:00:39,938 Afternoon, chickpeas. 17 00:00:39,938 --> 00:00:43,283 Got another box of mail addressed to Rusty. 18 00:00:43,283 --> 00:00:44,973 What did I tell ya? 19 00:00:44,973 --> 00:00:46,697 [device beeping] - OK. 20 00:00:46,697 --> 00:00:49,731 The alien should be right here. 21 00:00:49,731 --> 00:00:52,007 [grumbles] 22 00:00:52,007 --> 00:00:53,766 [gasps] Mr. Bolhofner! 23 00:00:53,766 --> 00:00:56,111 An alien must have taken over his body. 24 00:00:56,111 --> 00:00:57,283 I've got to save him. 25 00:00:57,283 --> 00:00:58,386 Ah! 26 00:00:58,386 --> 00:00:59,559 [grunting] 27 00:00:59,559 --> 00:01:01,628 Resisting is futile, alien! 28 00:01:01,628 --> 00:01:03,697 You've got two seconds to tell me what 29 00:01:03,697 --> 00:01:05,938 the blue blazes is going on! 30 00:01:05,938 --> 00:01:09,249 Don't panic, but there's an alien inside of you, Mr. B. 31 00:01:09,249 --> 00:01:10,628 [growls] 32 00:01:10,628 --> 00:01:12,007 I can totally prove it. 33 00:01:12,007 --> 00:01:13,214 See? 34 00:01:13,214 --> 00:01:15,352 It's flashing, which means-- 35 00:01:15,352 --> 00:01:17,180 low battery. 36 00:01:17,180 --> 00:01:18,559 [chuckles nervously] 37 00:01:18,559 --> 00:01:21,042 Let's just call this a whoopsie. 38 00:01:21,042 --> 00:01:22,559 A whoopsie? 39 00:01:22,559 --> 00:01:25,249 Why don't we call it two days' detention 40 00:01:25,249 --> 00:01:28,455 for tackling a teacher, Gurdle! 41 00:01:29,283 --> 00:01:30,352 You OK, Zach? 42 00:01:30,352 --> 00:01:31,869 We saw everything. 43 00:01:31,869 --> 00:01:33,386 Oh, yeah. 44 00:01:33,386 --> 00:01:35,559 Well, at least it's only two days of detention. 45 00:01:35,559 --> 00:01:37,180 [all gasp] - What? 46 00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:39,593 What's the big deal? I've had detention before. 47 00:01:39,593 --> 00:01:41,214 Yeah, in elementary school. 48 00:01:41,214 --> 00:01:42,800 This is middle school. 49 00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:45,145 The bullies are bigger, and so are their wedgies. 50 00:01:45,145 --> 00:01:46,628 - [shudders] - Yeah. 51 00:01:46,628 --> 00:01:48,318 Lynn once told me about a kid who went to detention, 52 00:01:48,318 --> 00:01:50,042 and the other kids gave him a wedgie 53 00:01:50,042 --> 00:01:51,800 so hard it stunted his growth. 54 00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:53,180 [shudders] Oh, great. 55 00:01:53,180 --> 00:01:54,249 What am I gonna do? 56 00:01:54,249 --> 00:01:57,800 Don't worry, dog. I gotcha. 57 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:00,766 Welcome to Rusty's School of Hard Knocks. 58 00:02:02,662 --> 00:02:04,973 Zach, you are about to learn how to survive detention 59 00:02:04,973 --> 00:02:06,662 from a certified baddie. 60 00:02:06,662 --> 00:02:08,249 Certified baddie? 61 00:02:08,249 --> 00:02:10,559 Didn't you go to the school nurse for a mosquito bite? 62 00:02:10,559 --> 00:02:12,352 It was on my knuckle, Stella. 63 00:02:12,352 --> 00:02:13,800 It was very painful. 64 00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:15,869 Now can we please get back to business? 65 00:02:15,869 --> 00:02:18,904 Lesson number one, make a strong first impression. 66 00:02:18,904 --> 00:02:22,076 Rusty Spokes Players, it's show time. 67 00:02:25,318 --> 00:02:27,421 'Sup? Name's Rusty Bones. 68 00:02:27,421 --> 00:02:29,835 Anybody got a problem with that? 69 00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:33,904 Clyde, your line. 70 00:02:33,904 --> 00:02:35,559 Golly, not me. 71 00:02:35,559 --> 00:02:38,352 I'm too intimidated by that sick physique. 72 00:02:38,352 --> 00:02:39,766 Me too. 73 00:02:39,766 --> 00:02:42,214 Did you see that news story on his ab routine? 74 00:02:42,214 --> 00:02:44,007 I can't stop watching it. 75 00:02:44,007 --> 00:02:45,421 OK, I'm out. 76 00:02:45,421 --> 00:02:47,524 Stella, I thought you were a professional. 77 00:02:47,524 --> 00:02:50,938 Now everybody in position for the next scene. 78 00:02:50,938 --> 00:02:54,076 Lesson two, establish your dominance. 79 00:02:54,076 --> 00:02:56,524 You want to go straight up to the toughest kid in detention 80 00:02:56,524 --> 00:02:58,283 and show him who's boss. 81 00:02:58,283 --> 00:03:00,869 Scene two. And action. 82 00:03:00,869 --> 00:03:03,904 [snoring] 83 00:03:03,904 --> 00:03:04,938 [gasps] 84 00:03:04,938 --> 00:03:06,421 [laughs] 85 00:03:06,421 --> 00:03:10,145 I'm Meathead Larry, the toughest kid in detention. 86 00:03:10,145 --> 00:03:12,352 Who talks like this? 87 00:03:12,352 --> 00:03:14,180 Sorry. [clears throat] 88 00:03:14,180 --> 00:03:17,352 So, Rusty Bones, you think you can take me, 89 00:03:17,352 --> 00:03:18,662 Meathead Larry? 90 00:03:18,662 --> 00:03:20,455 Oh, I know I can. 91 00:03:20,455 --> 00:03:23,697 Check it. [grunts] 92 00:03:23,697 --> 00:03:26,800 These are heavier than I thought. 93 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:28,904 [gasps] 94 00:03:29,766 --> 00:03:33,076 I, Meathead Larry, am never messing with you again, 95 00:03:33,076 --> 00:03:34,559 Rusty Bones. 96 00:03:34,559 --> 00:03:37,869 Parentheses, dramatically bursts into tears. 97 00:03:37,869 --> 00:03:40,214 Ugh, that's stage direction, Lincoln. 98 00:03:40,214 --> 00:03:42,973 How am I supposed to work with amateurs? 99 00:03:42,973 --> 00:03:46,318 Last lesson, instill fear with a tough backstory. 100 00:03:46,318 --> 00:03:48,111 And action. 101 00:03:48,111 --> 00:03:50,559 Hey, new guy with the perfect hair, 102 00:03:50,559 --> 00:03:52,214 what are you in for? 103 00:03:52,214 --> 00:03:54,800 Oh, a teacher got chalk dust on my leather, 104 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:56,869 so I trashed his whole classroom. 105 00:03:56,869 --> 00:03:58,938 Hope you didn't irritate that mosquito bite. 106 00:03:58,938 --> 00:04:00,766 Stella, the Rusty Spokes Players 107 00:04:00,766 --> 00:04:02,904 will no longer require your services. 108 00:04:04,697 --> 00:04:06,352 [bell ringing] - [gasps] 109 00:04:06,352 --> 00:04:08,559 [gulps] - It's detention time. 110 00:04:08,559 --> 00:04:10,904 You ready? - Actually, yeah. 111 00:04:10,904 --> 00:04:14,386 I'm surprised I'm saying this, but thank you, Rusty. 112 00:04:14,386 --> 00:04:16,490 Your lessons were all super helpful. 113 00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:17,904 Of course they were. 114 00:04:17,904 --> 00:04:19,318 Now take these, so the bullies can't 115 00:04:19,318 --> 00:04:20,697 see the fear in your eyes. 116 00:04:20,697 --> 00:04:22,938 Rusty, I can barely see in these. 117 00:04:22,938 --> 00:04:26,524 The darker the shades, the tougher the dude, my dude. 118 00:04:28,904 --> 00:04:31,180 OK, strong first impression. 119 00:04:31,180 --> 00:04:33,249 [pounding on door] 120 00:04:33,249 --> 00:04:34,559 Ah! 121 00:04:37,835 --> 00:04:40,835 ["Baa Baa Black Sheep" instrumental playing] 122 00:04:40,835 --> 00:04:42,145 [chuckles nervously] 123 00:04:42,145 --> 00:04:44,973 [laughter] 124 00:04:44,973 --> 00:04:46,593 OK, don't panic. 125 00:04:46,593 --> 00:04:48,835 Just establish dominance. 126 00:04:48,835 --> 00:04:50,938 [laughter] - Huh? 127 00:04:50,938 --> 00:04:53,214 You're in my seat, punk! 128 00:04:53,214 --> 00:04:55,318 [rock music] 129 00:04:55,318 --> 00:04:59,007 Oh, so you want to be a tough guy, huh? 130 00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:00,766 [grunts] 131 00:05:00,766 --> 00:05:02,800 Look at this poser. What are you in for? 132 00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:04,490 Did you lose a fight to a printer? 133 00:05:04,490 --> 00:05:06,559 [laughter] - Good one, Anderson. 134 00:05:06,559 --> 00:05:09,386 I know it's a good one, Pablo. 135 00:05:09,386 --> 00:05:10,697 [voice cracking] The name's-- 136 00:05:10,697 --> 00:05:13,180 [clears throat] The name's Zach. 137 00:05:13,180 --> 00:05:15,352 Bones, uh, Z-Bones. 138 00:05:15,352 --> 00:05:18,214 I'm in here because I had a rumble with the Hof. 139 00:05:18,214 --> 00:05:20,869 Yeah, I didn't like the way his 'stache was looking at me, 140 00:05:20,869 --> 00:05:23,318 so I was all, "You got a problem, huh? 141 00:05:23,318 --> 00:05:27,249 Want some of this? 'Cause I'm serving it up hot." 142 00:05:28,249 --> 00:05:29,524 [laughter] 143 00:05:29,524 --> 00:05:31,214 You fought Bolhofner? 144 00:05:31,214 --> 00:05:32,455 Yeah, right. 145 00:05:32,455 --> 00:05:35,559 OK, chuckleheads, in your seats. 146 00:05:35,559 --> 00:05:38,283 And thanks a lot for the shiner, Gurdle. 147 00:05:38,283 --> 00:05:39,766 Huh? 148 00:05:39,766 --> 00:05:41,042 Just checking in before I head out 149 00:05:41,042 --> 00:05:43,076 for my daily swim in the gym pool. 150 00:05:43,076 --> 00:05:45,800 And don't even think about making a run for it, 151 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:48,318 not like you'll get past Rocket anyway. 152 00:05:48,318 --> 00:05:51,318 [snarling] 153 00:05:55,111 --> 00:05:56,352 [growling] 154 00:05:56,352 --> 00:05:57,662 Whoa. 155 00:05:57,662 --> 00:05:59,386 So, Zach, you really did take on the Hof. 156 00:05:59,386 --> 00:06:00,973 [giggles] 157 00:06:00,973 --> 00:06:03,973 [clears throat] It's Z-Bones, punk. 158 00:06:05,731 --> 00:06:07,042 To Zach! 159 00:06:07,042 --> 00:06:08,386 And Rusty for teaching him. 160 00:06:08,386 --> 00:06:09,524 Yeah! 161 00:06:09,524 --> 00:06:11,421 Whoo, whoo, yeah! 162 00:06:11,421 --> 00:06:12,904 You guys should have seen it. 163 00:06:12,904 --> 00:06:14,455 They totally think I'm one of them. 164 00:06:14,455 --> 00:06:16,559 Honestly didn't see this one working out. 165 00:06:16,559 --> 00:06:17,662 No offense, Rusty. 166 00:06:17,662 --> 00:06:20,249 None taken. 167 00:06:20,249 --> 00:06:23,249 Now all I have to do is get through tomorrow's detention, 168 00:06:23,249 --> 00:06:24,697 and I'm home free. 169 00:06:24,697 --> 00:06:27,421 You couldn't have done it without me. 170 00:06:27,421 --> 00:06:29,145 I have return-- 171 00:06:29,145 --> 00:06:30,145 oh! 172 00:06:30,145 --> 00:06:32,283 [groans] What's with these doors? 173 00:06:33,628 --> 00:06:35,386 Watch out. Don't tackle me. 174 00:06:35,386 --> 00:06:37,421 There he is! 175 00:06:37,421 --> 00:06:39,007 Do you like my jacket, Z-Bones? 176 00:06:39,007 --> 00:06:41,145 It's just like yours. 177 00:06:42,180 --> 00:06:43,800 Listen, we've been talking. 178 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:46,042 And now that we know you're one of us, 179 00:06:46,042 --> 00:06:48,697 we want to bring you in on a little fun today. 180 00:06:48,697 --> 00:06:50,628 Oh, sure. Like volleyball? 181 00:06:50,628 --> 00:06:52,352 Comic books? - Oh, no. 182 00:06:52,352 --> 00:06:54,421 Way more fun than that. 183 00:06:54,421 --> 00:06:56,559 All right, you know the drill by now. 184 00:06:56,559 --> 00:06:57,938 I swim. You stay. 185 00:06:57,938 --> 00:07:00,386 Rocket door. Cap snap. 186 00:07:01,524 --> 00:07:03,662 Let's do this. 187 00:07:09,145 --> 00:07:10,766 [snarling] 188 00:07:12,042 --> 00:07:13,421 You coming, Z-Bones? 189 00:07:13,421 --> 00:07:16,180 Oh, uh, the fun involves leaving the room. 190 00:07:16,180 --> 00:07:17,490 Cool, cool, cool. 191 00:07:17,490 --> 00:07:21,007 [chuckles nervously] So where are we going? 192 00:07:24,835 --> 00:07:26,318 The teacher's lounge? 193 00:07:26,318 --> 00:07:28,524 I do hear they have excellent decaf. 194 00:07:28,524 --> 00:07:30,628 [laughter] 195 00:07:30,628 --> 00:07:34,352 Z-Bones, you slay me. 196 00:07:34,352 --> 00:07:36,835 What's, uh-- what's all this for? 197 00:07:36,835 --> 00:07:39,214 Oh, just booby trapping the place. 198 00:07:39,214 --> 00:07:41,731 It's about time we get revenge on the teachers 199 00:07:41,731 --> 00:07:43,766 who put us in detention, right, guys? 200 00:07:43,766 --> 00:07:44,904 You're going to do what? 201 00:07:44,904 --> 00:07:47,249 I mean, uh, I've always found 202 00:07:47,249 --> 00:07:48,662 that whoopee cushions do the trick. 203 00:07:48,662 --> 00:07:50,145 Yeah, like who tooted? 204 00:07:50,145 --> 00:07:52,938 Not me, ha! It's hysterical. 205 00:07:52,938 --> 00:07:55,628 You're not chickening out, are ya? 206 00:07:55,628 --> 00:07:57,938 Good. 207 00:07:57,938 --> 00:08:00,111 Anderson, that's a lot of cement. 208 00:08:00,111 --> 00:08:02,111 Taylor, where'd you get that jar full of snakes? 209 00:08:02,111 --> 00:08:04,697 Pablo, I didn't know they made glue traps that big. 210 00:08:04,697 --> 00:08:07,697 [whimpers] 211 00:08:07,697 --> 00:08:10,421 [laughter] 212 00:08:12,249 --> 00:08:13,421 [growling] 213 00:08:15,904 --> 00:08:18,249 [growling, pounding] 214 00:08:19,214 --> 00:08:20,214 I can't wait to see the look 215 00:08:20,214 --> 00:08:21,766 on the teachers' faces tomorrow. 216 00:08:21,766 --> 00:08:25,904 Yeah, they'll probably be all, ahh, ooh, ah, ha, ha! 217 00:08:25,904 --> 00:08:27,697 [laughs] Right, Z-Bones? 218 00:08:27,697 --> 00:08:30,904 [chuckles nervously] Yeah, totally. 219 00:08:32,421 --> 00:08:35,318 All right, you're all free to go. 220 00:08:37,904 --> 00:08:39,249 - [snarls] - Ah! 221 00:08:44,318 --> 00:08:46,111 You guys go on ahead without me. 222 00:08:46,111 --> 00:08:48,352 I forgot my, uh, nunchucks. 223 00:08:48,352 --> 00:08:50,111 Can't leave without them. 224 00:08:50,111 --> 00:08:54,214 That Z-Bones is a wild card. 225 00:08:54,214 --> 00:08:56,214 [groans] 226 00:08:56,214 --> 00:09:00,662 [clattering] 227 00:09:00,662 --> 00:09:02,662 I can't let this happen. 228 00:09:02,662 --> 00:09:05,662 [dramatic music] 229 00:09:05,662 --> 00:09:10,421 ♪ ♪ 230 00:09:10,421 --> 00:09:14,042 Well, well, well, just as I suspected. 231 00:09:14,042 --> 00:09:15,731 I was actually replacing these 232 00:09:15,731 --> 00:09:17,421 with, uh, more dangerous ones. 233 00:09:17,421 --> 00:09:18,593 Yeah, yeah, that's it. 234 00:09:18,593 --> 00:09:20,180 Oh, phew. 235 00:09:20,180 --> 00:09:21,559 We thought you were taking them down. 236 00:09:21,559 --> 00:09:24,386 That's totally what he was doing, Pablo. 237 00:09:24,386 --> 00:09:25,973 [sighs] 238 00:09:25,973 --> 00:09:28,938 Look, I'm not the tough guy I was pretending to be. 239 00:09:28,938 --> 00:09:31,835 I didn't actually bare-knuckle box Bolhofner. 240 00:09:31,835 --> 00:09:34,076 I tackled him because I thought an alien 241 00:09:34,076 --> 00:09:35,766 was living inside of him. 242 00:09:35,766 --> 00:09:38,800 That's who I really am. 243 00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:40,524 And you can wedgie me to oblivion, 244 00:09:40,524 --> 00:09:42,835 but I am not gonna let you pull your prank. 245 00:09:42,835 --> 00:09:45,111 The teachers don't deserve this. 246 00:09:45,111 --> 00:09:47,559 [knuckles cracking] - You know what? 247 00:09:47,559 --> 00:09:50,835 Saying that took some serious guts, newbie. 248 00:09:50,835 --> 00:09:52,559 Guess you are pretty tough after all. 249 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:54,938 Yeah, and if we're being honest here, 250 00:09:54,938 --> 00:09:56,145 I actually didn't want to do 251 00:09:56,145 --> 00:09:57,593 the whole booby trap thing either. 252 00:09:57,593 --> 00:10:00,007 Oh, my gosh. Thank goodness you said it. 253 00:10:00,007 --> 00:10:02,318 Me neither. I don't want more detention. 254 00:10:02,318 --> 00:10:04,593 The "My Fair Lady" auditions are coming up. 255 00:10:04,593 --> 00:10:08,111 [in Cockney accent] I was born to be in that show, guvnah! 256 00:10:08,111 --> 00:10:10,731 Well, I was only doing it because I thought 257 00:10:10,731 --> 00:10:12,421 you guys wanted to. 258 00:10:13,628 --> 00:10:15,973 So, Z-Bones, you're into aliens? 259 00:10:15,973 --> 00:10:17,662 That's pretty cool. 260 00:10:17,662 --> 00:10:19,180 I've been saying that Bolhofner's 261 00:10:19,180 --> 00:10:21,076 an extraterrestrial for years. 262 00:10:21,076 --> 00:10:24,145 It would explain a lot. 263 00:10:24,145 --> 00:10:26,145 So it turns out that I just needed 264 00:10:26,145 --> 00:10:28,869 to be honest with those guys, and everything was cool. 265 00:10:28,869 --> 00:10:31,042 [scoffs] That might work for you, 266 00:10:31,042 --> 00:10:33,145 but us tough guys have a different code, 267 00:10:33,145 --> 00:10:34,835 and I'm sticking to it. 268 00:10:34,835 --> 00:10:36,145 [mosquito buzzing] - Hey, Rusty. 269 00:10:36,145 --> 00:10:37,731 Watch out for that mosquito. - What? 270 00:10:37,731 --> 00:10:39,214 Where? 271 00:10:39,214 --> 00:10:41,007 [screams] 272 00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:43,007 Ouchie! Nurse, please! 273 00:10:43,007 --> 00:10:45,214 [laughter] 274 00:10:48,042 --> 00:10:49,352 ♪ Cramped inside this tiny space ♪ 275 00:10:49,352 --> 00:10:51,421 ♪ May sound bad but ain't the case ♪ 276 00:10:51,421 --> 00:10:54,318 ♪ In the Loud house ♪ - ♪ Loud house ♪ 277 00:10:54,318 --> 00:10:56,697 ♪ Duck and dodge and push and shove ♪ 278 00:10:56,697 --> 00:10:59,180 ♪ That's the way we show our love ♪ 279 00:10:59,180 --> 00:11:02,249 ♪ In the Loud house ♪ - ♪ Loud house ♪ 280 00:11:02,249 --> 00:11:03,559 ♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪ 281 00:11:03,559 --> 00:11:04,766 ♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪ 282 00:11:04,766 --> 00:11:05,973 ♪ Stand in line to take a pee ♪ 283 00:11:05,973 --> 00:11:07,214 ♪ Never any privacy ♪ 284 00:11:07,214 --> 00:11:09,731 ♪ Chaos with 11 kids ♪ 285 00:11:09,731 --> 00:11:12,145 ♪ That's the way it always is ♪ 286 00:11:12,145 --> 00:11:13,559 ♪ In the Loud house ♪