1
00:00:11,245 --> 00:00:13,514
[clicking]
2
00:00:13,614 --> 00:00:15,783
Okay, science club. Listen up.
3
00:00:15,883 --> 00:00:17,351
For our next order of business,
4
00:00:17,451 --> 00:00:21,322
we will be holding a fundraiser
to buy a telescope!
5
00:00:21,422 --> 00:00:22,156
- Ooh!
- Yes!
6
00:00:22,256 --> 00:00:23,857
Not that I don't appreciate
7
00:00:23,957 --> 00:00:26,194
the one the art club
donated to us.
8
00:00:26,794 --> 00:00:28,129
[creak, clunk]
9
00:00:28,829 --> 00:00:30,931
[clears throat]
Each of you will receive
10
00:00:31,099 --> 00:00:33,534
a wagon
full of scented candles
11
00:00:34,102 --> 00:00:39,140
to raise money
for the Galacta-tron 3000!
12
00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:41,442
[gasps] A Galacta-tron 3000?!
13
00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:45,513
Wunderkids Weekly says it can
see 3 million light years away!
14
00:00:45,613 --> 00:00:46,747
[all marvel]
15
00:00:46,847 --> 00:00:48,115
But keep in mind,
16
00:00:48,116 --> 00:00:50,418
we can only afford it
if every student sells
17
00:00:50,518 --> 00:00:52,620
all of the candles
in their wagon.
18
00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:53,854
I have never dabbled
19
00:00:53,954 --> 00:00:55,756
in the exchange of goods
for currency,
20
00:00:55,856 --> 00:00:57,758
but how difficult could it be?
21
00:00:58,192 --> 00:00:59,660
[knocking on door]
22
00:01:00,128 --> 00:01:02,129
Greetings, cash-having citizen.
23
00:01:02,130 --> 00:01:04,865
May I interest you
in buying scented candles?
24
00:01:04,965 --> 00:01:07,968
They only cost...
15 dollars?
25
00:01:08,136 --> 00:01:10,804
It's just soy, paraffin,
and vanilla extract.
26
00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:13,241
[snorts] Seems a bit excessive,
but...
27
00:01:13,341 --> 00:01:16,344
Anyhoo, how many
can I put you down for?
28
00:01:18,146 --> 00:01:19,046
[doorbell rings]
29
00:01:19,147 --> 00:01:20,381
Greetings!
30
00:01:20,481 --> 00:01:23,151
Would you like to buy
some scented candles?
31
00:01:23,951 --> 00:01:25,819
With that many cats,
I can only imagine
32
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,955
the putrid odors
plaguing your abode.
33
00:01:28,055 --> 00:01:31,024
- [hisses]
- [cats yowling]
34
00:01:31,159 --> 00:01:33,861
You'll take one cinnamon,
one pine?
35
00:01:33,961 --> 00:01:35,963
Splendid!
Let me find those.
36
00:01:36,063 --> 00:01:37,798
[sniffs] Peach.
37
00:01:37,898 --> 00:01:40,167
[sniffs] Aw, warm linen.
38
00:01:40,168 --> 00:01:41,869
[sniffs] New car.
39
00:01:41,969 --> 00:01:43,937
[sniffs] Hot apple pie.
40
00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:45,939
[sniffs] Tree bark.
41
00:01:46,039 --> 00:01:48,075
[sniffs] Sauteed onions.
42
00:01:48,176 --> 00:01:49,777
[coughs] Sorry.
43
00:01:49,877 --> 00:01:52,713
The combination of scents
is inducing nausea.
44
00:01:52,813 --> 00:01:54,182
[retches]
45
00:01:54,782 --> 00:01:56,850
[vomits, coughs]
46
00:01:57,418 --> 00:01:58,185
Oh, no!
47
00:01:58,186 --> 00:01:59,720
You got fungus
48
00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:01,555
in my bacteria culture.
49
00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:04,258
Thanks, TODD,
but even a reenactment
50
00:02:04,358 --> 00:02:08,262
of the development of penicillin
won't make me feel better.
51
00:02:09,863 --> 00:02:13,200
What's wrong? Did someone
say "expresso" wrong again?
52
00:02:13,201 --> 00:02:17,205
[sighs] Only you.
But that's not the problem.
53
00:02:17,305 --> 00:02:18,806
Science club
is having a fundraiser,
54
00:02:18,906 --> 00:02:21,609
and I'm letting everyone down
because I can't convince anyone
55
00:02:21,709 --> 00:02:23,210
to buy a single candle.
56
00:02:23,211 --> 00:02:25,946
Well, I happen to be
a convincing expert.
57
00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:27,748
- [shudders]
- [giggles nervously]
58
00:02:27,848 --> 00:02:31,084
Sorry. I thought I had my
convincing suit on under there.
59
00:02:31,219 --> 00:02:35,623
Anyway, I think I can convince
a team of specialists to help.
60
00:02:36,224 --> 00:02:39,026
Welcome to the Loud School
of Sales!
61
00:02:39,126 --> 00:02:40,761
Hmm. Interesting.
62
00:02:40,861 --> 00:02:44,298
Leni, Lola, and I will teach you
how to win over customers.
63
00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:46,500
Lesson one: Be approachable.
64
00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:49,136
At Reininger's, all employees
greet customers
65
00:02:49,237 --> 00:02:50,971
with a smile and eye contact.
66
00:02:51,071 --> 00:02:53,240
Oh, pishposh, that's ridicu--
67
00:02:53,241 --> 00:02:54,775
[bright tinkling]
68
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:58,779
I suddenly have a strange urge
to hand you all my money.
69
00:02:59,247 --> 00:03:01,148
[chuckles] That was impressive.
70
00:03:01,649 --> 00:03:04,785
Lesson two: People are
way more likely to buy from you
71
00:03:04,885 --> 00:03:06,520
if you shower them
with compliments.
72
00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:09,390
And a person
with your superb intellect
73
00:03:09,490 --> 00:03:12,259
should be able to do that
with her eyes closed!
74
00:03:12,260 --> 00:03:14,662
Also, loving
that shag hairstyle.
75
00:03:14,762 --> 00:03:16,297
So chic!
76
00:03:16,397 --> 00:03:18,165
[giggles] Why, thank you!
77
00:03:18,266 --> 00:03:19,833
So, can I have 20 bucks?
78
00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:22,035
Of course, anything for--
79
00:03:22,135 --> 00:03:24,605
Oh. Oh, I see
what you did there.
80
00:03:25,138 --> 00:03:26,274
Kudos.
81
00:03:26,374 --> 00:03:28,476
Finally, you'll need
a convincing suit.
82
00:03:28,576 --> 00:03:29,543
Here's one of mine.
83
00:03:29,643 --> 00:03:30,944
It'll help you feel confident
84
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:32,813
so you can nail any sale.
85
00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:35,983
Mmm... after I take it in
a little.
86
00:03:37,418 --> 00:03:38,786
[doorbell rings]
87
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,856
Well, hi there, Cookie Crumb!
88
00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:45,459
What brings you
all the way over here?
89
00:03:45,559 --> 00:03:47,060
Okay, let's see...
90
00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:49,129
"Start with a smile."
91
00:03:50,831 --> 00:03:51,765
Ugh!
92
00:03:52,466 --> 00:03:54,101
"Make eye contact."
93
00:03:54,935 --> 00:03:55,936
[beep]
94
00:03:56,036 --> 00:03:57,538
[whirring]
95
00:03:58,205 --> 00:03:59,139
Ah!
96
00:04:00,007 --> 00:04:01,409
"Use flattery."
97
00:04:01,509 --> 00:04:06,347
Uh... My, your hair is
especially, uh, bulbous today.
98
00:04:06,447 --> 00:04:07,548
Bulbous?
99
00:04:07,648 --> 00:04:09,182
I'm sure after all that charm
100
00:04:09,317 --> 00:04:10,651
I dazzled you with,
101
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:14,021
you're feeling convinced to buy
scented candles, right?
102
00:04:15,823 --> 00:04:18,191
[grunting]
103
00:04:18,326 --> 00:04:20,361
Whoa! Whoa! Ah!
104
00:04:20,461 --> 00:04:23,030
[grunting continues]
105
00:04:24,798 --> 00:04:25,666
[coughs]
106
00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:28,736
[clears throat]
So where were we?
107
00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:33,707
[sighs] How can someone
with a brain like mine
108
00:04:33,807 --> 00:04:35,909
not be able to sell candles?!
109
00:04:36,009 --> 00:04:37,378
[gasps] That's it!
110
00:04:37,478 --> 00:04:39,346
My brain!
111
00:04:39,347 --> 00:04:41,949
With my Brain Lobe
Enlargement Helmet,
112
00:04:42,049 --> 00:04:43,083
or BLEH,
113
00:04:43,183 --> 00:04:45,052
we can locate the exact section
of the brain
114
00:04:45,152 --> 00:04:47,921
responsible for salesmanship
and enlarge it.
115
00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:51,759
- Alright, TODD, engage!
- [bell dings]
116
00:04:51,859 --> 00:04:54,728
[gasps] I feel like
a salesperson already!
117
00:04:54,828 --> 00:04:56,697
Actually, that was me.
118
00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:58,866
My toaster pastry is ready.
119
00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:01,969
Engaging the BLEH now.
120
00:05:02,403 --> 00:05:05,506
Astrophysics,
multivariable calculus,
121
00:05:05,606 --> 00:05:07,174
dental hygiene...
122
00:05:07,274 --> 00:05:09,176
Aha!
Salesmanship!
123
00:05:09,276 --> 00:05:10,711
[gasps] That's it!
124
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:13,481
Okay, TODD, press command,
shift, plus.
125
00:05:13,581 --> 00:05:14,882
[ding]
126
00:05:15,616 --> 00:05:16,950
[trilling beep]
127
00:05:17,050 --> 00:05:18,151
Press it again!
128
00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:19,252
[ding]
129
00:05:19,387 --> 00:05:21,388
[beeping]
130
00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:23,824
And again!
And again and again!
131
00:05:24,758 --> 00:05:26,427
- Keep going!
- [dinging]
132
00:05:26,527 --> 00:05:29,563
[suspenseful music playing]
133
00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:31,298
[beeping]
134
00:05:31,399 --> 00:05:33,567
How do you feel, Lisa?
135
00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:38,171
Oh-ho!
I feel ready to make some sales!
136
00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:40,974
By the way, TODD,
are those new wires?
137
00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:43,811
Because they are working for ya!
138
00:05:46,313 --> 00:05:47,915
May I interest you in a candle?
139
00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:51,819
I cannot smell,
but I will take five!
140
00:05:52,653 --> 00:05:54,922
He-hey, you gorgeous goths!
141
00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:58,526
Nothing conjures the dead like
the smell of fresh lavender.
142
00:05:58,626 --> 00:06:00,227
Light one of these babies
and you'll have
143
00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:02,830
the whole underworld
lining up to possess you!
144
00:06:02,930 --> 00:06:05,733
[swinging, jazzy music playing]
145
00:06:05,833 --> 00:06:09,036
Trust me. With this
Kiss From a Rose candle,
146
00:06:09,136 --> 00:06:13,240
you can turn this place
from pigsty to hog heaven!
147
00:06:13,774 --> 00:06:15,075
[sniffing]
148
00:06:15,175 --> 00:06:16,309
[snorting happily]
149
00:06:16,444 --> 00:06:18,646
Virginia, pay the nice lady!
150
00:06:18,746 --> 00:06:20,581
[cash register dings]
151
00:06:20,681 --> 00:06:23,817
[swinging music continues]
152
00:06:27,521 --> 00:06:29,322
You should have seen me, TODD.
153
00:06:29,457 --> 00:06:30,991
I am a sales machine!
154
00:06:31,091 --> 00:06:32,993
I dropped the cash off
at school
155
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:34,862
so the club
can get their telescope.
156
00:06:34,962 --> 00:06:38,532
Hurray! Time to get your brain
back to normal.
157
00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:41,001
Ah, no, no, no.
Let's not be hasty.
158
00:06:41,101 --> 00:06:42,836
Selling is the ultimate hoot!
159
00:06:42,936 --> 00:06:45,706
My serotonin levels
are through the proverbial roof!
160
00:06:45,806 --> 00:06:47,808
Let's keep this party going!
161
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:50,110
Sell! Sell! Sell!
162
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:53,346
I do not like
where this is going.
163
00:06:53,481 --> 00:06:55,482
I need a pastry pronto.
164
00:06:55,483 --> 00:06:56,984
[bell dings]
165
00:06:58,919 --> 00:06:59,953
[birds chirping]
166
00:07:00,053 --> 00:07:02,956
[light jazz music playing]
167
00:07:03,056 --> 00:07:06,126
Boy, how good would that look
on a raccoon?
168
00:07:06,226 --> 00:07:09,196
Ooh! Eh, Nacho has been
in the market
169
00:07:09,296 --> 00:07:12,232
for a good cotton onesie
for a while.
170
00:07:13,501 --> 00:07:14,802
Come back soon.
171
00:07:15,202 --> 00:07:17,204
My guy!
Has anyone ever told you
172
00:07:17,304 --> 00:07:20,207
that you have the build
of a power athlete?
173
00:07:21,074 --> 00:07:23,844
A little time with this barbell
and I think we might be looking
174
00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:26,513
at the future
Mr. Senior Universe!
175
00:07:26,514 --> 00:07:28,315
[grunting]
176
00:07:30,317 --> 00:07:32,653
What are you doing
selling my barbell?
177
00:07:32,753 --> 00:07:34,788
I need it for
my deadlift seshes.
178
00:07:34,888 --> 00:07:36,056
Ah-ah, no, you don't.
179
00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:37,758
A force of nature like you
needs something
180
00:07:37,858 --> 00:07:40,127
that makes you
really engage your glutes.
181
00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:42,830
Like, uh, Flip's tow truck!
182
00:07:42,930 --> 00:07:44,632
[bright tinkling]
183
00:07:44,732 --> 00:07:46,266
Strap it to yourself and pull
184
00:07:46,366 --> 00:07:48,235
for the best workout
of your life.
185
00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:50,638
And it's yours
for just five dollars!
186
00:07:51,371 --> 00:07:52,540
Deal!
187
00:07:53,406 --> 00:07:56,276
Let's see, what's next?
What's next? Uh...
188
00:07:56,376 --> 00:07:57,277
[gasps]
189
00:07:58,679 --> 00:08:00,147
Bingo!
190
00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:04,952
Lisa, what are you doing?
191
00:08:05,052 --> 00:08:06,920
Why, selling the house,
of course!
192
00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:08,889
It's a complete gut job.
193
00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:11,959
The wear and tear of eleven kids
is no joke,
194
00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:14,061
but, uh, some ding-dong
will buy it.
195
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:16,563
Lisa, you have gone too far.
196
00:08:16,564 --> 00:08:18,566
It is time to go back to normal.
197
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:21,268
[growls]
198
00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:22,570
Uh-oh...
199
00:08:24,437 --> 00:08:26,774
Ya got yourselves
a real bargain.
200
00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:30,978
Enjoy your new robot assistant,
complete with toaster oven.
201
00:08:31,579 --> 00:08:36,884
Even though you sold me,
you are still my best friend!
202
00:08:36,984 --> 00:08:38,652
[gasps] Wait a minute.
203
00:08:38,752 --> 00:08:40,554
I sold TODD?
204
00:08:40,654 --> 00:08:42,222
Why would I do that?
205
00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:47,661
We did what had to be done.
We're better off without him.
206
00:08:47,761 --> 00:08:50,130
But TODD is my friend!
207
00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:53,433
A friend that was getting
in the way of a sales train.
208
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,435
[yells, gasps]
209
00:08:57,104 --> 00:08:58,906
I command you to cease!
210
00:08:59,006 --> 00:09:00,273
Oh no, you don't!
211
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:02,876
[Sales Lisa]
Ah! You are mussing my sales!
212
00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:04,945
[Lisa] Unhand me, you fiend!
213
00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:07,247
[grunting]
214
00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:09,817
[groaning]
Sales Lisa is too strong!
215
00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:11,819
[exclaiming]
216
00:09:11,919 --> 00:09:14,187
Why are you fighting me?
217
00:09:14,287 --> 00:09:15,889
I'm gonna make us rich!
218
00:09:15,989 --> 00:09:19,092
With my skills, I can
sell anything to anyone!
219
00:09:19,192 --> 00:09:21,561
- [bell dings]
- Eureka!
220
00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:23,363
You know, uh, Sales Lisa,
221
00:09:23,463 --> 00:09:26,533
I'm not so sure
you can sell to anyone.
222
00:09:26,967 --> 00:09:28,702
Of course I can!
223
00:09:28,802 --> 00:09:32,740
Bet you can't sell
that silly brain helmet to me!
224
00:09:34,107 --> 00:09:35,408
Oh, pshaw.
225
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:36,677
Easy money.
226
00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:39,512
Behold, the BLEH!
227
00:09:39,647 --> 00:09:42,282
It has a dazzling silver finish
and is lightweight,
228
00:09:42,382 --> 00:09:46,053
making it the perfect accessory
for the genius gal on the go!
229
00:09:46,553 --> 00:09:48,922
I don't know.
It looks complicated.
230
00:09:49,022 --> 00:09:52,726
Maybe if you demonstrate it
for me?
231
00:09:52,826 --> 00:09:54,061
Of course!
232
00:09:54,161 --> 00:09:56,664
It's very user-friendly.
You just have to--
233
00:09:57,530 --> 00:09:58,766
Wait a second.
234
00:09:59,232 --> 00:10:03,403
Ha-ha! Too late!
So long, Sales Lisa!
235
00:10:03,503 --> 00:10:04,671
[winces]
236
00:10:04,672 --> 00:10:06,273
No, no, no!
237
00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:10,210
I have so much left to sell!
238
00:10:11,812 --> 00:10:13,046
Oh, phew.
239
00:10:13,146 --> 00:10:16,183
Now there's just one more thing
I need to do.
240
00:10:17,084 --> 00:10:18,285
Ta-da!
241
00:10:18,385 --> 00:10:21,254
All the toaster pastries
you could ever want.
242
00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:23,190
Aw. Thank you, Lisa.
243
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:25,392
I'm sorry for getting
so out of control.
244
00:10:25,492 --> 00:10:27,594
It's great to be back to myself.
245
00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:28,762
[computer pings]
246
00:10:29,763 --> 00:10:32,733
Huh. Since the last fundraiser
was such a success,
247
00:10:32,833 --> 00:10:34,768
the science club wants
to have another one
248
00:10:34,868 --> 00:10:36,403
to buy stain-proof lab coats.
249
00:10:36,503 --> 00:10:39,172
Okay. We'll each need
to sell a wagon full of--
250
00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:40,874
[thunderous zapping]
251
00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:42,776
[sizzling]
252
00:10:43,210 --> 00:10:46,213
Sorry. I may have overreacted.
253
00:10:50,417 --> 00:10:52,452
♪ May sound bad
but ain't the case ♪
254
00:10:52,552 --> 00:10:54,054
♪ In the Loud House ♪
255
00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:55,522
♪ Loud House ♪
256
00:10:55,622 --> 00:10:58,191
♪ Duck and dodge
and push and shove ♪
257
00:10:58,291 --> 00:11:00,260
♪ That's the way
we show our love ♪
258
00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:01,929
♪ In the Loud House ♪
259
00:11:02,029 --> 00:11:03,363
♪ Loud House ♪
260
00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:04,731
♪ Laundry piles
stacked up high ♪
261
00:11:04,732 --> 00:11:06,099
♪ Hand-me-downs
that make me cry ♪
262
00:11:06,199 --> 00:11:07,334
♪ Stand in line
to take a pee ♪
263
00:11:07,434 --> 00:11:08,535
♪ Never any privacy ♪
264
00:11:08,635 --> 00:11:11,204
♪ Chaos with 11 kids ♪
265
00:11:11,304 --> 00:11:13,273
♪ That's the way
it always is ♪
266
00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:14,875
♪ In the Loud House ♪