- ♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪
♪ Dodging girls like Ping-Pong balls ♪
♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪
♪ Leaping over laundry piles
♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪
♪ Guy's got to do what he can to survive ♪
- ♪ In the Loud house
♪ In the Loud house
- ♪ Duck, dodge, push, and shove ♪
♪ Is how we show our love
- ♪ In the Loud house, in the Loud house ♪
- ♪ One boy and ten girls
♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world ♪
- ♪ Loud Loud Loud
♪ Loud house
- Poo-poo.
[dramatic music]
♪
[children chattering]
- Hey, Frank. - Frank, over here, buddy!
- He's so cool!
- Now, before we pack up, I need a volunteer
to look after Frank this weekend while I'm out of town.
[all shouting]
- Come on, please, Mrs. Johnson! - Me! Me!
- Lincoln. - Yes!
- Way to go, Lincoln. - Aw, man!
- Now, Lincoln, this is a major responsibility.
Frank needs to be fed twice a day,
and under no circumstances should he
be let out of his cage.
Unlike me this weekend. [chuckles]
[school bell rings]
- Well, see ya Monday, Mrs. Johnson.
This is gonna be the best weekend ever!
- I'm not sure your sister Leni will think so.
Remember last Halloween?
[doorbell rings]
- I got it!
- Trick or tr-- - Ah!
Spider!
- Ugh! I'm all right.
She hid in her room for three weeks.
- If I had to worry about my sisters
every time I wanted to do something,
I'd never do anything.
Besides, I have a plan.
Stealth mode.
- Now I'm worried.
- Spider! - [laughs]
- Get it away! Get it away!
- Aw, come on, it's fake!
[bird squawks]
- Shh...
[bird squawks]
There ya go, buddy! [knock at door]
- Can I borrow the big kid scissors?
[gasps] Hey, what's that?
Oh-ho! He's so creepy!
Can I play with him? Can I?
- No, no, Frank stays in the cage.
- Aw...
- Lana, give me back my dolly!
[gasps] Eee!
He's so adorable!
[together] Has Leni seen this?
- No, and we want to keep it that way, don't we?
So shh.
- Excuse me, some of us are trying to solve for Y.
[gasps] Is that an aphonopelma chalcodes?
- Uh... it's a tarantula.
My class calls him Frank.
- Fascinating specimen.
Has Leni seen this?
- No, that's why I'm trying to keep him a--
[chattering and cooing]
Secret.
[chattering and cooing]
- Has Leni seen it?
- Guys, for the last time,
Leni's not gonna see--
- See what?
[together] Nothing!
- [gasps] [all gasp]
- Oh, my gosh!
Are you planning a surprise party for me?
Wait, don't tell me.
I want to be surprised.
[all sigh]
- That was close. - [sighs]
- You better know what you're doing, Lincoln.
- [sighs]
- Hey, you look a little sluggish, buddy.
Bet you'd really like to get out and stretch your legs.
I guess a few minutes wouldn't hurt.
- [squeaks]
- Now, where did I put those crickets?
Maybe this'll cheer ya up.
Frank?
Where'd you go?
Frank, come out! This isn't funny!
Crud.
Where are you, Frank?
Where are you? Where are you?
[together] Where's who?
- There you are!
The two cutest twins in town!
Found 'em! See ya.
- He was talking about me. - I sure hope so.
[liquid bubbling and sloshing]
- What in Schroedinger's cat?
- Sorry, Lis. I'll clean it up later.
[explosion booms] [cat yowls]
[gasps] Lynn, freeze!
- We're playing freeze tag? Cool!
[drum solo playing]
♪
- Ow! - Dude!
- Really dig what you're laying down there, sis!
[dramatic music]
Gotcha!
- What are you doing with my fake spider?
- Fake? Oh, nothing.
Here,
and here's your fake dog poop.
- I don't have any fake dog poop.
- Ah!
- Just kidding!
[both laugh]
-
Where are you?
- What are you doing, you weirdo?
- I'm, uh...
Looking for my contact lens!
Oh, there it is!
That's better.
- Can I unfreeze now?
- Crud, crud, crud!
- All right, Lincoln.
You don't wear contacts.
What is going on?
- You've been acting even weirder than usual, bro.
- Yeah, there's no way you think Lana is cute.
[indistinct chatter]
- Okay, I'll tell you.
Well, Frank was looking sluggish,
so I took him out of his cage to get a little exercise,
and then I turned to get the crickets,
and he was gone.
[indistinct chatter]
- What are we whispering about?
Oh, right, my surprise party!
Don't worry. I won't tell me.
[all scream]
See, I know nothing,
just making a smoothie.
- Where did he go? - Where?
- The spider? - What are we gonna do?
- Oh, I need milk.
[all gasp]
- Wait! You're lactose intolerant!
- No, I'm not.
I'm tolerant of everyone,
whether they lack toes or not.
all: No!
Huh?
[all sigh]
- Eee, pider!
[suspenseful music]
[pot clangs]
[pot clanging]
- So who wants to try my new recipe?
It's curds and-- - [gasps]
- Way, way too much spinach!
[all gasp]
- Ugh! I know. What was I thinking?
[plunk]
Ha, nice try, Luan, but I'm not falling
for another one of your fake spiders.
Though, this one looks pretty real.
[screams] Spider!
all: No!
- Worst surprise party ever!
- Frank! No-oh-oh-oh!
- I just want to say I'm sorry for your loss
and that I'd be honored to serve as funeral director.
I keep an assortment of caskets on hand.
Were you thinking shoebox, or for a little more money,
mahogany?
[funeral dirge]
- Hey, Lincoln,
I brought you this casserole.
My nana said that there's
no greater comfort in times of grief.
- Thanks. [sighs]
This might as well be my funeral too.
Our whole class is gonna hate me
for letting this happen to Frank.
- We are gathered here to mourn the untimely passing
of Frank the tarantula,
a pet beloved by all.
- Except Leni.
- The murderer!
- Yeah!
- This is all Leni's fault.
- Guys, this isn't Leni's fault.
It's mine.
- Ew, ew, ew!
- I knew Leni was afraid of spiders,
but I brought Frank home anyway.
It was a bad idea.
I guess I deserve to have my whole class hate me.
- [retches]
- Ew, gross, Cliff! Show some respect!
- Whoa, weird. This hairball looks like Frank!
- Ew, gross, Lana!
Show some respect!
- Because this isn't Frank!
It's a hairball too!
Which means Frank could still be alive!
- [screams] Spider!
- And it sounds like Leni just found him.
- Uh, that wasn't Leni.
I know that scream.
[coughing]
Oh, hi, Mr. Loud. Trick or tr--
- [screams] Spider!
- I'm all right.
- Dad's afraid of spiders?
[horn honking cheerful tune]
- And it looks like he's got
the exterminator on speed dial!
all: Frank!
[hard rock music]
♪
- Oh, hello, cute little caterpillar family.
[laughs]
- It's okay, sir. There's been a misunderstanding.
You don't need to kill the spider.
- Ha, what are you? A spider hugger?
Nobody stops me from getting my spider.
- I got to go save Frank!
- We can help. - I can help too.
[all shouting]
- Okay, you guys distract the exterminator
while I look for Frank.
[all shouting]
Unfreeze.
- [screams] There's a big scary spider
in the last room on the right!
I hope someone can exterminate this ugly spider!
- [laughs] Ah!
- What's the matter?
Afraid of a little rubber spider?
[laughs]
- I ain't afraid of nothin'.
- Excuse me. - [screams]
- The scary spider went in there.
- Mm... [sniffs]
- What are you doing, you weirdo?
- Oh, well, uh... [stammers] I didn't--
- [growls]
I'm a spider. Come and get me.
[grunts] I'm all right.
- [grunts]
- [giggles]
- [spits]
- Kids, they can be so juvenile.
Mouthwash?
- [swishes]
[steam whistling]
- My special ghost pepper formula.
The tingle means it's working.
- Frank's not downstairs, so he must be--
♪
- Upstairs.
- [grunts]
- Ha! I've got you now!
- Wait, stop, no!
[gasps]
[all gasp]
Huh?
- Wha--
- Wahoo!
- Frank!
- Yes, Frank! - Wahoo!
- Why you...
- Hold it right there, mister.
If you exterminate this spider,
you'll exterminate this boy's future.
Everyone will think he's a spider killer,
and no one will ever trust him again.
Do you really want that on your conscience?
- Wow.
I never thought of it that way.
Lady, you just changed my life.
both: Really?
- 'Course not,
you spider huggers!
Exterminator out.
Here's my bill.
- Leni, that was amazing!
But why?
- I heard what you said at the funeral,
and besides, maybe spiders aren't so bad after all.
I mean, this one's kind of cute.
No, it's not! Take it! Take it!
Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew! Ew! It blinked at me!
- Let's get you back in your cage, Frank.
- I always thought Frank was a strange name
for a female spider.
- Frank's a girl?
- Mm-hmm. I can tell from the markings.
Plus, female spiders
always get sluggish before they give birth.
- Frank's gonna be a mommy?
all: Aw!
- Bye, Frances! - Later!
- So long, Frances.
- I'll miss ya, Frank,
but I'm glad things are gonna be
back to normal around here.
- 20, 21, 22...
[ominous music]
23...
[screams]
Spider!
[dramatic music]
♪
[dog barks, bird chirps]
- It's chore day at the Loud house,
and taking out the trash is my job,
and in a family as big as mine,
chores can be pretty intense,
but we get through 'em, 'cause we all do our fair share.
[upbeat music]
♪
- Chores all done!
[splat]
- Well, except maybe for Leni.
Wait. Two of you do one chore?
- Three of us. - Ah!
- Sigh.
- Lynn Loud makes the snag!
Touchdown!
- That doesn't seem very fair.
- Open sesame, bro.
- Little present from Charles.
Special delivery from Cliff,
and airmail from Walt.
♪
- What about Geo?
[toilet flushes]
- I taught him to use the toilet.
- This isn't a chore for you; it's a hobby.
[water splashes]
- Uh-oh. Geo fell in again.
Hang on, baby! Mama's comin'!
- [giggles]
- [grunts]
Can I get a little help here?
- Can't you see I'm doing the laundry?
Ha! LOL, Bobby.
[giggles] - Whoa!
[grunts]
[sighs]
[dramatic music]
Dang it.
[vacuum whirs]
- Dude, what gives?
- All right, everyone, listen up!
It has come to my attention that
I've gotten a raw deal in this house.
- You mean your white hair? It's nice.
It makes you look like Pop-pop.
- I'm not talking about our grandfather!
I'm talking about my chore!
It's way harder than all of yours, and it's not fair.
- Please, our chores are
just as hard as yours,
if not harder.
- Oh, really?
Look at Lisa. What does she even do?
- Oh, hold on a moment, Janice.
I do the bills, Lincoln.
Now, listen, I want that charge removed, Janice.
I don't think anyone in this house
bought a car in Saskatchewan.
- Well, if all of you
think your chores are so hard,
I'm sure one of you won't mind trading with me.
- No way, Lincoln.
There's a very delicate balance in this house,
and if we all start trading chores,
it will literally open up a can of worms.
- What's so bad about that? Worms rule.
- Okay then.
One, two, three, four!
I won't do your stupid chore!
- What the heck are you doing?
- I'm on strike until someone agrees
to trade chores with me.
Five, six, seven, eight!
Garbage day will have to wait!
- What am I supposed to do with all this poop?
- 9, 10, 11, 12!
Take that poop out by yourself!
- Ugh, will you stop talking in chants?
- 13, 14, 15, 16! Uh--
Hmm...
- Think we should intervene, honey?
- No, not yet, I want to see what
he rhymes with 16.
Also maybe we should let
the kids handle this themselves.
They might learn something.
- Good idea.
In that case, it's time for ol' Jigsaw Loud
to get back in the puzzle game.
- [chuckles] Didn't we agree
never to use that name again?
♪
- And that's why I deserve to be
the next Miss Cute'n'Mean's Beauty Queen.
[yelps]
- What do I want? Someone else's chore!
When do I want it? Now!
What do I want? Someone else's chore.
When do I want it?
Ow!
[rock guitar riff]
- So what'd you think, Chunk?
- It stinks.
- Way harsh, dude.
- Not the song, your room.
Chunk's gotta blow.
- Think it through. Don't be rash.
Trade with me, or live with trash!
Think it through. Don't be rash.
Trade with me, or live with--ah!
Ha, missed me!
Ah!
- Ew.
- Aw, got a problem?
- Oh, not with you, Pop-pop.
♪
- Princesses cannot exist in this filth!
- It's disgusting, and I know disgusting.
- I totally agree. - This can't go on.
We have to do something.
- Hey, hey, ho, ho!
Tomorrow I get a whole new cho'...
er.
Good thing they're giving in,
'cause I'm all out of rhymes.
[yawns]
[suspenseful music]
Lori, where's all my clean laundry?
- Hmm, laundry, laundry--
Oh! I didn't do it.
- And why not?
Ha! You're going on strike?
- We're all going on strike
until you end yours.
- That means no laundry,
no clean dishes, no vacuuming.
- And no doing the bills.
Janice, cut the power and the water.
We're going off the grid.
- Well, good luck,
'cause I'm not backing down.
all: Neither are we!
- One, two, three, four!
I won't wash your clothes no more!
- Chores! Huh? What are they good for?
all: Absolutely nothing!
Say it again!
- Now should we intervene?
- Oh, no, let's give the kids a little more time
to resolve this on their own.
- Sweet! Who's up for round two?
Jiggy Loud's about to do a pizzy up in this hizzy!
- Uh-huh.
- [snores]
[laughs]
[sniffs]
Ugh!
[footsteps squishing]
Ew, what is that?
- Ha, bunch of hair from the sink drain.
Makes a great footbag.
- Hey, Lori, now that Lisa stopped paying the bills,
it must be pretty hard having no cell service.
- Who needs cell service?
I found a new way to text Bobby.
Fly away, my faithful messenger!
- [squawks]
- [laughs]
- What? Phones crash all the time.
- [chirps]
- Pretty messy in here.
Must be hard to get any work done.
- On the contrary.
The garbage and my chemicals have fused,
creating a scientific breakthrough.
I call him homo trashilius,
or Trashy for short.
- [growls]
- Ah!
- Okay, now should we intervene?
- I still think the kids can solve this themselves.
Besides, the house has looked worse.
Aw, come here, sweetie.
- Round three with Jiggy P?
- Mm.
- Ah!
[trash splashes]
♪
- Help! My footbag's out of control!
- This could all be over if you'd just end your strike.
- Not till you end yours!
[doorbell rings]
- Hi, we're from the Miss Cute'n'Mean pageant,
here to do a behind-the-scenes interview
with Miss Lola Loud.
- ♪ Here she is
♪ The next Miss Cute'n'Mean! ♪
[farts]
- Ew!
More like Miss Gross'n'Gnarly!
Interview over!
- No! [growls]
You...
This is all your fault!
- [laughs]
- Lori! - [shrieks]
- Walt brought me your text.
Usually, I bleed profusely from my nose,
turn into a robot,
and eventually faint when I'm around you,
but this has given me the confidence to say,
"I love you too!"
- What? - Don't worry.
I already broke the news to Bobby.
He took it pretty hard,
but a really nice cheerleader is consoling him.
[smooches lips]
- Whew! Finally lost Lola.
- You!
- Ah!
- [growls]
- Trashy, bad!
No, no, not you, Janice.
- Lisa, what have you been feeding him?
- His name is Trashy.
What do you think, genius?
- [growls]
[Lily wails]
- Baby?
- Great, Lincoln, you made Lily cry.
- There, there, it's okay, Lily.
- [chitters]
- I'm more than just poop patrol.
- [whimpers]
- Guys, if the raccoon was in the crib,
then where's Lily?
[all gasp]
- Lily! - She's in here somewhere!
- We'll never find her in this mess.
- We have to clean up.
I declare this strike officially over!
Ow!
Who's with me?
all: We are!
- Janice, how soon can we get back on the grid?
24 hours?
What if I throw in a muffin basket?
[electricity buzzes]
- Come on, you got to be here somewhere!
Hang on, Lily. Your big brother's coming!
[glasses shattering]
- There's a better way.
- Wash and learn!
[laughs]
- Sigh.
[upbeat rock music]
[vacuum whirs]
[dishes clanking]
- Hang on, Lily. I'm coming!
♪
[gasps]
So much underwear!
- Yeah, and that's just dad's.
Now get out of my way, little bro.
I've got a system.
[machine beeps]
- Hey, sugar lips.
Should our couple name be Clori or Llyde?
- Bobby and I are back together.
- Abort, abort.
[sighs]
- Poop patrol is done, but no Lily!
- Beds are made, no Lily!
- [grunts] No baby.
- Maybe she's under all this trash!
- Step aside.
Taking out the trash is my job.
- [gulps]
- Well, we've all done our chores,
and there's still no Lily.
- This is all my fault!
For the rest of my life... - [giggling]
- I'll be haunted by the sound
of her adorable giggling!
- Lincoln, what are you crying about?
- Mom, I confess, we lost--
Lily?
Have you guys had her this whole time?
- Of course, you didn't think
we'd leave her in that mess, did you?
- You know, we're proud of you guys for working this out.
Now, who wants to do a puzzle with J to the Iggy?
all: Who?
- When it comes to chores,
nobody in the Loud house has it easy.
The truth is, we all do our fair share.
- Hey, Loud, don't bother!
There's no trash pickup this week!
The garbage workers are striking for more money.
- Wait, they get paid to take out the trash?
all: One, two, three, four,
give us cash or no more chores!
- Any ideas, J-Pizzy?
- Now, this is a puzzle.
Can you call me that again? - J-Pizzy.
- Yes!
- ♪ Cramped inside this tiny space ♪
♪ May sound bad but ain't the case ♪
♪ In the Loud house - ♪ Loud house
- ♪ Duck and dodge and push and shove ♪
♪ That's the way we show our love in the Loud house ♪
- ♪ Loud house
♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪
♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪
♪ Stand in line to take a pee
♪ Never any privacy
♪ Chaos with 11 kids
♪ That's the way it always is ♪
♪ In the Loud house