- ♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪
♪ Dodging girls like ping pong balls ♪
♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪
♪ Leaping over laundry piles
♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪
♪ Guy's gotta do what he can to survive ♪
♪ In the Loud House, in the Loud House ♪
♪ Duck, dodge, push and shove ♪
♪ This is how we show our love ♪
♪ In the Loud House, in the Loud House ♪
♪ One boy and ten girls
♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world ♪
♪ Loud! Loud! Loud!
♪ Loud House! ♪ - Boo boo.
- ♪
Will our captivating captain
find her first mate,
or will it be man overboard?
Find out tonight as we set sail for love
on "The Dream Boat."
- Eeeee! Karen should totes pick Bronson.
He's so gorge, I can't even...
- No way, dude. What about Brock?
He wrote her that sweet jam.
- I like Bram. -
- Ew, he gives me the creeps.
- Exactly.
- I like Bryant.
He's so romantic.
- Karen, I'll be your North Star,
'cause no matter where this journey takes you,
I'll always be there to guide you home.
- North Star? Ach, poppycock.
Tree moss is a far more reliable means of navigation--
given that it only grows on the north side of trees.
- I like Blaine.
I bet he can bench 300 pounds,
maybe 320 with his bod.
- Blaine? But he wore flip-flops to their first date.
I mean, I can't even...
- Lincoln, it's so much fun watching this show with you.
You're like literally one of the girls.
- One of the girls?!
- This mud mask is both cleansing and invigorating.
- Oh, my pores are tingling.
- Thanks, Lincoln. I always mess up my right hand.
- Hey! Someone put her dirty old dress in the wash
with all my pageant gowns!
Oh, I can't rip you apart, if you're already dead!
- Back two over one. - You got it, bro.
These accessories will make our outfits rockin'.
- R-R-R-Rockin'!
- Lincoln, how's that hem coming?
- Almost done.
- Thanks. I can wear this poncho for all five seasons.
- Yikes! Is spending all my time around girls
turning me into one?
Nah, I'm sure I'll turn out fine.
What did I miss?
Did Blaine finally put on some loafers?
- This show's lame. Let's watch guy stuff.
Hey!
A lifetime in the extreme wilderness
has made Rip Hardcore as tough as a two-dollar steak.
- Now this is my kind of show.
- Since when? Oh, no, turn it back!
We're gonna miss the anchor ceremony!
- - It's mine! Gimme it!
- Let me get this straight.
You think living with the girls has made you unmanly,
so, we're spending a weekend in the extreme wilderness
so, we can turn into steaks?
- Uh, close enough.
Now, are you ready to get extreme?
- You know it! -
- Wait, I promised my dads I'd stay in their sightline.
It's supposed to be a really nice B&B.
- Clyde, how are we supposed to toughen up
with your dads watching over us?
- They were willing to bring us
some of their complementary welcome scones.
- Now this spot looks perfect.
- But the sign says no camping here, extreme danger.
- Exactly--extreme.
Our first order of business--securing shelter.
- My dads used this tent on a safari last year.
It has its own verandah.
- Tough guys don't sleep on verandahs, Clyde.
They build their own shelter.
- What a beaut.
- All in a manly day's work.
Now how about we rustle up some grub?
- Great. My dad made my favorite--
Swiss chard frittata.
- Forget the frittata, Clyde. Tough guys eat beans.
- Were you thinking chili or more of a cassoulet?
- Mm! Mm! Mm! Good stuff, right?
- Very...tasty.
- I think I'll save the rest for later.
- Yeah, for breakfast-- or never.
- Well, we're burnin' daylight here.
Better get started on our campfire.
- Way ahead of you.
This baby's got LED lights, silk flames,
and a realistic crackling sound.
- Clyde, tough guys make real fires.
- R-R-Really tough guys don't even need fires.
They brave the elements.
- Sorry. Musta been the beans.
Or the loss of feeling below my waist.
- No need to apologize, Clyde.
Tough guys let it all out.
- Well, in that case...
All this extreme ruggedness has worn me out.
What level of firmness do you want?
- We don't need that. The ground will be our mattress.
- Oh, so extra firm.
- We're tough guys, not animals.
I'm really glad we did this, Clyde.
Out here in the woods, away from all the girls,
I'm starting to feel like a real man.
- Me, too.
Oh, I think I just found a way to stay warm.
Ah, nothing like waking up and--
- Water! We're in the water!
- Ah! How did this happen?
Paddle!
- Hey, isn't that our shelter?
It's making a dam.
Yeah! - We're saved.
And all because we built our own shelter,
like the tough--
- Lincoln? Are you okay?
- I'm fine. I landed on a really soft rock.
- Not a rock! Moose!
- Ha! Nothing two tough guys like us can't handle.
Right, Clyde?
- - Whoa!
- Oh! Clyde, are you okay?
- I'm fine. I landed on a really soft rock.
- - Not a rock. A beehive!
This is still nothing tough guys like us can't handle.
At least it's not raining. -
- Is that all you've got?
- Lincoln, I know this probably sounds lame
to a tough guy like you, but I'm hungry, and wet,
and cold, and I kinda wish
I was with my dads at the B&B,
eating welcome scones.
- So do I.
I was kidding myself, Clyde.
I'm no tough guy.
After all those years around all those women,
it's too late for me.
Now, if you don't mind,
I'm gonna lie down on this nice soft rock.
- - Not a rock! Bear!
- Clyde, quick, play dead.
- Lincoln, that was amazing.
How did you know to play dead?
Oh, I can't rip you apart, if you're ready dead!
- It's something I learned from Lucy.
- D-D-Does she know anything about k-k-keeping warm?
- No, but Leni does.
- I can wear this poncho for all five seasons.
The key is the faux fur lining.
- Wow, it is so toasty.
- The key is the birch bark lining.
Now, come on, Clyde, we're goin' home.
- Which way?
- Why, it's just...
This way!
Lisa said that moss only grows on the north side of trees.
- My dads are staying at the North Valley B&B.
Follow that moss!
- How do we get up there?
- You got it, bro.
These accessories will make our outfits rockin'.
- R-R-R-Rockin'!
- And if you braid the strands real tight,
they're strong enough to use as rope, right, Chuck?
- Right as rain, luv.
We're gonna need a bigger window, though.
- Back two over one.
That'll hold.
- This is great, Lincoln.
What'd you make this rope out of?
- This should help the poison ivy.
Oh, my pores are tingling.
- It also soothes sunburn, poison ivy,
and mild to moderate acne.
- ♪
- How are we gonna move this bad boy?
- Step aside. I got this.
You've gotta lift with your legs, not your back.
You see?
- ♪
- How do you balance in those?
- Eyes forward, chin up, tushy clenched.
- ♪
- Good tip, Lincoln. It really works.
- I don't think you have to do the wave.
- Voilà!
- ♪
- Clyde, we did it! We made it back!
- I'm pooped.
I'm just gonna sit down and wait for my dads
on this nice soft rock.
- Oh, this one's really just a rock.
- I thought spending so much time around my sisters
was a problem, when actually it's just the opposite.
If it wasn't for them,
I'd probably be a moose meal by now,
and now that I don't have to worry about
what's manly or girly or any of that junk,
I can go back to enjoying this.
Who wants strawberry muffins?
- DAD & I do! I do!
- Oh, Blaine, please tell me you're not wearing clogs.
- ♪
- I'm so excited, I can't sit still!
- I know. I'm so excited, my palms are sweaty.
I hope he gets here soon.
I'd really like to eat my lunch.
- Today's the day that our classmate Chandler
is handing out invites to his birthday party.
It's at the sewage treatment plant where his dad works,
and everyone says it's gonna be epic!
- I hear the facilities can process 500 metric tons
of human waste a day.
- I hear they have a secret room for the mutant animals
they find in the sewers.
- I hear, if you take off your mask in there,
the stink will burn off your nose hairs.
- I really hope we get invited.
- - Huh?
- It's happening!
Oh... Sorry.
Sweaty palms.
- Put on your galoshes, people,
'cause it's time to partay!
- Darren, Miguel, Molly,
girl Jordan, boy Jordan, Kyle, Kat..
Oh, over here! Over here!
- And the last two invites go to...
Eeeeeee!
- Joy and Jen!
- We can probably stop holding hands now.
- I don't get it. How could Chandler not invite us?
I loaned him a pencil in math class
and held the bathroom door open for him.
- And I made eye contact with him every day...
like this...
Who wouldn't want this face at a party?
- Hi, Lincoln. - L-L-L-Lori?
- Hey, Lori.
- Thanks for telling me about the job opening here.
Guess what? I literally got hired!
Now I can buy a new dress for the big dance this Friday.
The theme is "Romance Under the Sea,"
and Bobby and I are the Sea King and Queen.
It's gonna be the greatest night ever.
Loud, back to work!
If you got time to lean, you got time to clean.
- Coming!
Oh, I almost forgot.
Employees get free tokens every shift.
You guys can have mine.
- Thanks! Clyde, check it out.
Free tokens from Lori. - L-L-L-Lori?
Great move! Fifty points!
- Woo! - Wow, way to go, Clyde.
- I'm saving my tickets to buy Lori that bobblehead pig.
- Ooh, I hope she doesn't already have one.
- Are you going to be okay with Lori working here?
- As long as I don't see her, hear her or smell her, sure.
- Here you go, free pizza and root beers.
Just my way of saying thanks for helping me get this job.
- ♪ La la la la la la la
♪ La la la la la la la la - Hey, Larry.
- It's Lincoln.
The guy who held the bathroom door for you?
- Hm ...don't remember that.
Hey, did I just see you get free pizza?
- Yeah, my sister works here.
- Man, that must be nice.
- Here, why don't you take it?
- Really? Thanks.
- Hey! Lori gave me that pizza.
I was going to put it in my scrapbook.
- Clyde, if we give Chandler all our freebies from Lori,
he might invite us to his sewage party after all.
- Brilliant! The man with a plan.
- You got that right.
This was up your nose, wasn't it?
Game over.
Insert one token to continue playing.
- Aw, man.
- Hey, Chandler, need some tokens?
- Sweet. Thanks, Larry.
- I'll grab us some free drinks.
- Here you go.
Anything for the brother who helped me get this job.
- LINCOLN, CLYDE, Cheers!
- Hey, you guys are all right.
You know, I'm having a birthday party this Friday and--
- LINCOLN &
- It's your birthday? I had no idea.
- Me, neither.
I didn't know you were having a party
at the sewage treatment plant--
I mean, wherever your dad works, I mean--
- Uh, Clyde, why don't we let Chandler
finish what he was saying?
- Yeah, so, my party. You guys totally have to come.
I'll bring the invites tomorrow.
Meet here after school.
- Yeah. Cool. Whatev.
Eeeeee!
♪ We're goin' to the partay ♪
- Here he comes. Play it cool.
- Cool is my middle name.
- Chandler, buddy, how's it going?
- Hey, dude, you got any more free tokens?
- What? Oh. Yeah, sure.
- Thanks!
- Where are the invitations? - He probably just forgot.
He's got a lot on his mind
planning that big sewage party and all.
- Hey, guys, I almost forgot...
to ask for three root beers.
Can you get us some from your sister?
- What's with this guy?
- Be patient, Clyde.
I'm sure we're gonna get our invitations.
Hey, Lori, can you spare some root beers for my friends?
- Sorry, Lincoln, I've gotta cool it on the free stuff.
I don't wanna get in trouble with my boss.
- I get it. I know how your boss is.
I remember how tough he was
when I talked to him about hiring you.
Sorry it took so long. The soda machine exploded.
Heh. Almost looks like a sewer backed up in there.
- Hm, yeah. Sad story, Larry.
Hey, I almost forgot...
we'd love a pizza-- half pepperoni, half meatball.
Thanks, dude!
- Sure, dude. Not a problem.
- Yeah, that's a problem.
Root beers are one thing, but a pizza is too much.
- I know. I'm sorry.
I mean, if anyone knows how hard it is
to get you a job, it's me.
- Are we really doing this?
- Doing what?
Here's your pizza, guys.
Hey, Chandler, may I "invite" you to have a slice?
- Thanks, dude.
- Aren't you forgetting something?
- Some pepper flakes would be great.
All my clever hints and nothing.
- Maybe we should just ask him for the invitations.
- Clyde, if we're too pushy, he might uninvite us.
Let's just keep playing it cool.
- You're right, Larry.
Oh! Now he's got me doing it.
- Two tickets? Oh, man.
I really wanted that ukulele,
but it costs 500.
Guys, gimme yours.
That's all you've got?
- Four hundred and ninety-eight...
four hundred and ninety-nine--
- Clyde, give Chandler your tickets.
- What?! No way!
I almost have enough for Lori's bobblehead pig.
A courting man must come bearing gifts, Lincoln.
- Focus on the invitations.
We're so close I can feel it.
Here, Chandler, you can have my tickets.
- Sweet!
Guys, I can't believe I forgot...
I promised to bring home some garlic knots.
- No more, Lincoln, and don't give me that
you got me this job baloney.
It's not gonna work.
- Lori, please?
I promise this is the last time.
Clyde and I really wanna go to this kid's party,
and if we don't give him everything he wants,
we could lose our invitations,
which, technically, we don't even have yet.
- Lincoln, you're literally babbling.
Loud, get back to work!
Fine! Now leave me alone.
- You rock, Loud. Later.
Oh, one more thing...
- Right. The marinara dipping sauce.
- No, these. Yes!
- Remember, it's my birthday, so you should bring presents.
Eeeeee!
♪ We're gonna party with sewage ♪
- Looking good.
- Hey, ready for your dance?
You're not wearing that, are you?
- I'm not going to the dance.
My boss is making me work tonight
to pay for all the free stuff I gave you.
Instead of "Romance Under the Sea,"
I'm gonna have mozzarella under the fingernails.
Thanks a lot, Lincoln.
- - Oh!!
♪ La la la la la
Phew! That was a close one.
- Clyde, what are you wearing?
- This is the only way my dads would let me
visit a place where I might get splashed with raw sewage.
Speaking of which,
are you ready to make this the greatest night ever?
- Yes, I am.
Loud, get to work!
If you have time to lean, you have time to clean.
- I'm on it.
- Ah, sea monster!
I mean, you look great, Lori.
- I know. Right?
Hey, little bro, thanks for convincing the manager
to let you fill in for me.
- Huh, it's the least I could do.
I mean, this dance is why you got this job in the first place.
- I'm sorry you won't get to go to your friend's party.
- That's okay. He's not really my friend.
He was just using me--
the way I was using you.
Have an awesome time tonight.
- Thanks, Lincoln.
- Bobby's here.
- Hey, Linc. - Clyde?
What are you doing here?
- I couldn't go to that party without you, Lincoln.
Besides, the Hazmat suit was giving me a heat rash.
- I guess we'll never get to experience
the wonders of raw sewage.
- Or have our nose hairs burned off by the stench.
Hey, Loud, grab a mop.
The toilet in stall three is overflowing.
It's a real stinkfest in there.
- Put on your galoshes, Clyde,
'cause it's time to party.
Yeah!
Whoa, this is better than the sewage treatment plant!
It's burning my nose hairs!
- ♪ Cramped inside this tiny space ♪
♪ May sound bad, but ain't the case ♪
♪ In the Loud House
♪ Loud House
♪ Duck and dodge
♪ And push and shove
♪ That's the way we show our love ♪
♪ In the Loud House, Loud House ♪
♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪
♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪
♪ Stand in line to take a pee ♪
♪ Never any privacy
♪ Chaos with 11 kids
♪ That's the way it always is ♪
♪ In the Loud House ♪