- ♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪
♪ Dodging girls like Ping-Pong balls ♪
♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪
♪ Leaping over laundry piles
♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪
♪ Guy's got to do what he can to survive ♪
- ♪ In the Loud house
♪ In the Loud house
- ♪ Duck, dodge, push, and shove ♪
♪ Is how we show our love
- ♪ In the Loud house, in the Loud house ♪
- ♪ One boy and ten girls
♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world ♪
- ♪ Loud Loud Loud
♪ Loud house
- Poo-poo.
♪
- Okay, let's see what we got.
Kale, tofu, "quin-oh-uh"?
- I think it's called quinoa.
I'd call it "keen-blah."
All this rabbit food
Lori's on another health-food kick.
No wonder her skin glows
like a Caribbean sunset!
- Are you picturing her on the beach again?
- Uh, no.
- Ooh, peanut butter!
Now we're talking!
- Ew, Lincoln!
Have a little class!
- That's all for sports.
And now, the weather.
- It's cloudy with a chance of you're disgusting.
- My whole life is like this.
- What are you talking about, Lincoln?
You got it made.
One guy surrounded by ten awesome sisters!
- Oh, Clyde.
Sweet, innocent Clyde.
Finally!
Gah! Forgot my loofah.
Dang it!
Mom, I'm off to meet Ronnie Anne!
You're meeting Ronnie Anne? -
- In that shirt? - Ho, ho, you call that posture?
- What about your hair?
- Are you wearing clean underwear?
- Okay, people, I'm accepting ideas
on how we should spend the day.
- Ooh! Ooh! We could go to Dairyland.
- Okay.
How about Gus' Games N' Grub?
- How about--
- I know someplace we'd all like.
♪
- Ow, ow, ow! Thumb cramp!
Aww, poor Linky.
- Oh, here's Bun Bun.
- Let Lily kiss your boo boo better!
Gauze! Stat!
- Clear! -
- Hm, I see your point.
- I tell ya, Clyde,
sometimes I wish I had ten brothers.
- And I wish you would not eat
our communal peanut butter with your booger-picking finger.
- See what I mean? - Hmm.
Aah!
- I've been pondering your wish from earlier.
- My wish?
- Yes, I think I can help you out.
This wristwatch can transport you to an alternate dimension
in which you'll have ten brothers.
- Right...
Lisa, I think you've been playing
with too many kiddy chemicals.
Holy moly! Awesome!
Wait. Why are you doing this for me?
- I need beta-testers.
Now, are we doing this or am I sending Lana
to a dimension where she's a toad?
- Oh, we're doing it!
you only have 24 hours to return home.
Otherwise, you'll be stuck there forever.
- Got it.
Let's do this! - Good luck.
I gotta go break the bad news to Lana.
Hmm.
This doesn't look like a different dimension.
- That is literally LOL.
Hurry up, Loni, time to go!
- Ooh! Whoa.
Loki, who moved the doorway?
- I'm ready, brah!
Let's rock!
- I "wooden" miss it!
Good one, Mrs. Coconuts.
- 62! Hut! - Uh. Sigh.
- Quit honking, Lexx,
or you'll get a frog down your pants!
- Touch me and I'm telling!
Mom!
- Can you Cro-Magnons diminish the cacophony
so our youngest sibling can suspend consciousness?
Speak English, Levi.
- Shut your pie-holes so Leon can nap!
- Holy moly.
- Will you be joining us, Lincoln?
- Ugh, where are we going? The mall?
- Yeah, right.
- You're literally hilarious, Lincoln.
We're going to Dairyland.
It was your idea. - Sweet!
My sisters would never all want to go to Dairyland!
- Ooh! Sisters?
- Uh, you know, the nuns.
They hate amusement parks.
- Yes! Dairyland was awesome!
- Great idea, Lincoln.
- Yeah, way to go, bro.
- You're the man, Lincoln!
- Whoops, sorry.
- You should be sorry...
'cause that was weak!
- Ha, that was nothing. Check this.
- Oh, yeah?
Well, nothing beats the real thing.
Chow time, boys.
- Gus' Games N' Grub? No way!
- Five pies for ten guys!
- I sure hope Mom and Dad gave us enough dough.
Get it?
- Sorry, I'm touching the pizza with my booger-picking finger.
- Are you kidding me?
You use your finger for your booger picking?
I use my thumb!
- Really? - Any digit is acceptable.
- Really? I use my toe. - I use this one.
- There's my army.
How was Dairyland?
- It was awesome!
- Hi, Mom.
- Bye, Mom!
- Hey, boys. - Pile on Dad!
- We got you! - Say uncle.
- I thought he was our dad. - Uncle!
- Sometimes I wonder
what it would be like to have daughters.
- Only 12 more hours.
I wish this didn't have to end.
Wait, why does it have to?
What if I didn't go back?
Guys, guess what! I'm staying!
- Okay. - Whatever.
- - Hang on, bros!
Let me grab my hockey stick.
Uh!
Uh, hey...
Lynn, heh, where's my room?
- Right where it always is, weirdo.
- Three of us live in here?
- Where else would we sleep?
The linen closet?
- Hey, where's Bun Bun?
- Luke flushed him.
- Lars gave him a very dignified funeral.
- Thank you.
- Not Bun Bun!
- Well...
Night, bro.
- Ow!
- Oh, there's my bat colony.
Uh. Oh. - One for waking me.
- Ow.
- And one for scratching my coffin.
- Ow.
- No line for the bathroom? Sweet!
Ah! Ahh!
- What's your damage, bro?
You woke me up. - Look!
The bathroom is disgusting! - You're right, bro.
We can't live like this!
Let's go clean it. We'll start with the toilet!
- Huh? Hey, hey, hey!
- Swirly time, dude! -
- How's it going, "Stinkon"?
- Ow!
- Aw, you're fine. Shake it off.
- Leon, you wanna kiss my boo boo
and make it better?
- - Ow!
- - Kiss your boo boo?
Does nobody do laundry?
- Oh, yeah. Got a winner.
- Uh, why are you guys wearing my shirts?
- Duh, 'cause ours were dirty.
- Well, now I don't have any clean ones,
and I'm supposed to hang out with Ronnie Anne!
- Ooh, the prince needs a clean shirt
when he sees his princess!
Ooh!
- Cut it out, guys.
- You know, if you wear your pants higher,
you won't need a shirt.
- Thanks a lot.
Now I need clean underwear too.
- I'm just playing, bro.
- Ah, Come on. I just combed my hair!
- Ooh!
- Pile on Romeo!
- Guys, Dutch oven, Loud-house style!
Say uncle! - Uncle!
- Stinky.
Remember what I said about staying here forever?
Yeah, that's not happening.
Phew!
I still have five minutes to get back!
Where is it? - Whoa!
Check out this sweet watch!
- Hey, that's mine!
- Finders, keepers, loser.
- No! I need that!
- Keep away with Uncle Lincoln's watch!
- Oops!
- You guys, this is serious!
- Pile on Dad! -
- Uncle, uncle, uncle!
- Phew, just in time.
- Hey, Stinkin', I almost forgot something.
My room. Bun Bun!
It worked!
- Are you okay?
Did you have a nightmare?
- Ahh! It didn't work!
- You want some water? - Aww.
- How about warm milk? - Do you want some water?
- Wait, why are they being nice to me?
- Aw, want us to stay until you fall asleep, Linka?
- Linka?
I'm in the wrong dimension!
Oh, thank goodness it was all just a nightmare.
- We heard you scream! Are you okay?
- Here's Bun Bun, Linky! - Lily will kiss it
and make it better. - Thanks, guys.
You're the best. -
- It's good to be home.
I'll never complain about having sisters again.
- Wait, what?
- I mean, you know, the nuns.
- Lincoln, is this yours? It fell on the floor.
- That was literally mine. You are so gonna pay!
- Please don't stick my head down the toilet!
- What? I meant with money.
- Oh, of course. That's more than fair.
- Breaking Lori's watch?
You, sir, have no class!
- I'm so glad my sisters are nothing like my brothers.
- Hey, Lincoln. I almost forgot something.
- Except for Lynn.
♪
- So then, bam!
My remote controlled plane
smashed right into Dad's disco ball
and it broke into a million pieces!
- The one he got for winning the Royal Woods
"Dance Your Pants Off" contest?
He's so proud of that thing.
- I know. If he ever finds out,
I'll be as dead as disco!
- Don't worry, you're not the only one
hiding something from Dad.
Ooh!
- I accidentally scratched the car with my rhinestone purse.
- You think that's bad?
Remember the blackout last week?
- I rather enjoyed the darkness.
Speaking of which, does anyone know
how to get black paint out of lace?
I painted Mom's wedding dress for my dark betrothal to Edwin.
- What can I say? We're not angels.
Sometimes we mess up, but the great thing is,
if you need to get something off your chest,
you can always trust your siblings.
Well, not all of them.
- What you guys talking about?
- Quantum physics. - Monster trucks.
- Bobby. - Politics.
- Baseball, jokes. - Global warming.
- You're telling secrets again, aren't you?
It's not fair! I never get included!
- That's because you're a tattletale, Lola.
- I am not!
Okay, I'll admit, I used to be a tattletale,
but I've changed!
- Uh-huh. - Sure.
- Yeah, right.
- Mom, they won't let me
in their secret secrets club!
- Mm, so where were we?
- I broke Dad's disco ball,
Luna caused the blackout, Lori scratched the car,
and Lucy ruined Mom's wedding dress.
Who's next? - Ooh! Ooh!
So you know how Dad was yelling at Charles
for chewing up his boots?
That was me.
- Wait a second. Weren't those steel toe?
- - Morning Linky.
I need a butler for my tea party.
You're it. - Yeah, that's not happening.
- Oh really?
I'd hate for Dad to find out
who broke his precious disco ball!
- Who told you about that?
- Ahh, top me off, Linkington.
I don't hear any tea.
- Hey Luce! Wanna play "drive me around
while I practice my pageant wave"?
- Hard pass.
- Okay. Maybe I'll go play dress up
with Mom's wedding gown instead.
Oh, wait, I can't.
Because someone ruined it.
- Who told you that?
Sigh.
- Luna, can I have the middle?
-Sorry, little dudette, I snagged it first.
- Oh, okay. I hope your show doesn't,
ya know, like, end suddenly.
I hear there have been a lot of blackouts lately.
- Who told--
- Lori, can I have head scratchies?
- No. I need both hands for texting.
- Oh. I just thought you wouldn't mind
since you've been scratching a lot of things lately.
- Two hands, please.
- ♪ With a moo-moo here, and a moo-moo there-- ♪
- Uh, I believe I said he had a pig.
- ♪ With an oink oink here and an oink oink there ♪
- How's my homework coming, Lis?
- I'm up to the letter S.
- Hmm, make the macaroni a little crooked.
I don't want my teacher getting suspicious.
Jester! How about a joke?
- Why do chicken coops only have two doors?
'Cause if they had four, they'd be chicken sedans!
Ha ha ha ha ha. Get it?
- Yes!
Isn't this fun, everyone?
- Well, I think we all know why we're here.
Lola knows our secrets and she's literally torturing us.
- Clearly, we've got a rat.
- Ew! Where? - No, Leni.
A rat is an informal term for a snitch.
So which one of you low-lifes is it?
- It wasn't me!
No, way!
Youch! What the?
Guys, stop!
I know who the rat is!
And her name rhymes with granola.
- Lisa?
- No. It's Lola!
She put a microphone in her tiara
and eavesdropped on our meeting!
Mom! They won't let me in their secret secrets club!
- Well, now we know
who the rat is, but what do we do about it?
- Yeah. She still has all our secrets!
- But what if we had one of hers?
- Fat chance. Lola's a pro.
She covers her tracks.
- Everyone makes mistakes.
Even Lola.
- Just ten more minutes, and I'll have all your cereal
separated for you, Lola.
- Oh, good job, Lisa, don't let any of that icky bran
mix with those yummy marshmallows.
Uh, smooth jazz, Luna? Nice try.
How about a little adult contemporary instead?
- Sure!
Anything for you, sis.
- Almost done with the second coat!
Then onto the third!
- Aha!
"If you're reading this, you must be snooping.
Get out of my room. Or else. Signed, Lola."
"I said, get out of my room. Signed, Lola."
Err!
Lola's diary!
"Today I broke Mom's most prized possession.
"Just kidding, only a moron would write secrets in a diary.
Now get out of my room! Signed, Lola."
Man, she's good!
What is your secret, Lola Loud?
- Lola, come back!
Don't you want me to put more
of that pink crud on your toenails?
- Busted!
I said, no sweets before dinner,
Mr. Sprinkles! Burr, it's cold in here.
Youch!
Where the heck
did this cactus come from?
"If you landed here, it means you were snooping in my room.
Enjoy the pricklies. Signed, Lola."
- Nice tiara, Loud.
What are you doing? Training for a beauty pageant?
- No!
Actually, yes!
- Oh. Well, good luck with that!
- No one has dirt on Lola Loud?
Sheesh. What did she do to these girls?
- Psst, over here.
Hey. I'm gonna help you.
Not because I like you, but because I'm tired
of always coming in second place to Lola.
- Wait, is this Lindsey Sweetwater?
- Do you want the dirt or not?
- Sorry. Proceed.
- Holy--
- Shamoley!
- Man, that is juicy!
And you got some really good dirt on Lola, too.
- - Yep.
And now it's time to take her down!
- Holy shamoley!
Who told you about that?
- If you tell Mom and Dad our secrets,
we'll tell them yours!
Now if you'll excuse us, those of us
who can trust each other are going to go hang out.
- So then, kaboom!
Mom and Dad's bedspread was burnt to a crisp.
- Guys! I just saw Lola marching into Mom and Dad's room!
I think she's ratting us out!
- She wouldn't dare!
- If she's taking us down, we're taking her down with us!
- Thank you for telling the truth, sweetie,
but you know I have to punish you.
You're grounded for a month.
- You're grounded? Wait, what's going on?
- You guys are off the hook.
I took the blame for all the stuff you did.
- What?
Why would you do that?
- 'Cause all I really wanted
was to be included in your group.
- Then why'd you threaten to tell on us
and make us do all that stuff?
- It was the only way I could get you to hang out with me.
But then I realized I went about it the wrong way.
Instead of using your secrets against you,
I should have tried to earn your trust.
So from now on, that's what I'm gonna work on.
If anyone needs me, I'll be up in my room
for the next thirty days.
Care packages welcome.
- Hey Lola, you know, we talked it over and decided...
You're in! You've earned our trust!
- Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes!
- Aw, so you guys won't believe
how bad I messed up the other day!
I was in the living room, practicing my pile driver
with Mom's ironing board.
- Oh, you guys!
That was so fun! Thanks!
Everybody get home safe!
So, you'll never believe what Lynn did!
Well, what did you expect? I'm Lola Loud.
It's not like they'll tell anyone!
So, anyway...
- ♪ Cramped inside this tiny space ♪
♪ May sound bad but ain't the case ♪
♪ In the Loud house - ♪ Loud house
- ♪ Duck and dodge and push and shove ♪
♪ That's the way we show our love in the Loud house ♪
- ♪ Loud house
♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪
♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪
♪ Stand in line to take a pee
♪ Never any privacy
♪ Chaos with 11 kids
♪ That's the way it always is ♪
♪ In the Loud house