♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪
♪ Dodging girls like Ping-Pong balls ♪
♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪
♪ Leaping over laundry piles
♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪
♪ Guy's got to do what he can to survive ♪
♪ In the Loud House, in the Loud House ♪
♪ Duck, dodge, push, and shove ♪
♪ Is how we show our love
♪ In the Loud House, in the Loud House ♪
♪ One boy and ten girls
♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world? ♪
♪ Loud Loud Loud
♪ Loud House
Poo-poo.
I don't get it, Clyde.
Usually I'm a good student,
but lately it's been all Cs and Ds,
and now an F!
Wow, and a frowny face too.
That's cold.
If I don't turn this around, I could fail fifth grade.
Lincoln, you can't!
If I go to middle school without you,
I could fall in with the wrong crowd,
and get tattoos, and start littering.
Don't worry, Clyde. I've got a plan.
Sorry, Lincoln, but my tutoring schedule
is completely booked.
I've got math with Lucy on Mondays,
geology with Lynn on Tuesdays,
finger painting with Lily on Wednesdays,
et cetera, et cetera.
Oh, being the resident genius
is both a blessing and a curse,
though I believe in neither.
But Lisa, you're my last hope!
Mm, pish-posh.
Try the community college.
I've heard through the tutoring grapevine
that students there tutor for extra credit.
Great idea, Lis.
Lori, you're three minutes late for pre-calc.
Move it or lose it!
Erm, beg your pardon.
Is this the Loud residence?
Yep, you must be my tutor. I'm Lincoln.
I'm Hugh. Quite chuffed to meet you.
Uh, the chuff is all mine.
Come on in.
I really appreciate this, Hugh.
I have a big multi-subject test coming up,
and I need to ace it.
So I'm like, if you literally don't know the difference
between dance team and colour guard--
Ba...ba...ba...
Lori, you okay?
Err, um, yes.
I was just going to get a hunk of meat.
I mean, a dish of cereal.
Err, tall drink of water.
Miss, you dropped your mobile.
I heard a goose! I call dibs!
Ba...ba...ba...
I heard a sheep.
Aah! My face!
Ba...ba...ba...
Hey, guys.
Oh, Lincoln, I didn't know you were entertaining.
Hi, I'm--
Ba...ba...ba...
Um, hello. I'm Hugh, Lincoln's tutor.
It's lovely to meet you all.
Ba...ba...ba...
Could you guys please get out of here?
We're trying to study.
It's a free country, Lincoln.
We can stand where we want to.
I'm standing here!
The heck you are!
-You're blocking my view! -You're blocking my Hugh!
Oh, my word.
There's quite a few of you.
Friendly lot.
Ah, hello.
Bit cheeky, aren't we? Oh...ah...
Come on, Hugh, let's go somewhere a little less crowded.
Sorry about my sisters. They're not usually like this.
Oh, it's no bother. They seem like very
very spirited young ladies.
-Get out of the way! -You're blocking my Hugh!
As I was saying, sorry about my--
Ow, my eye!
Again, sorry about my sisters.
Maybe we should study in my room.
Brilliant! Cheerio!
Pip-pip and all that rut.
Lynn Loud Sr.
I did a college semester in merry old England.
So many memories.
Bangers and mash, riding the Tube...
Ah, yes, cheers.
Oh, Hugh?
My window is literally stuck
and I need someone very strong to open it.
♪ Hmm, hmm, fish and chips
There you are, love. Right as rain.
Wow, I bet you work out a lot, huh?
Well, I did do a spot of crew in fifth form.
I like all your forms.
I need to borrow Hugh for a second.
-I'm tutoring Lola. -What?
Glad to help. What's the subject?
This is called a rectus abdominis.
Otherwise known as a six-pack.
-Oh, I say. -Now, if you'll turn around,
I'll point out the gluteus maximus.
Really? But this is most--
All right, all right, class dismissed.
Hup!
Sorry about this.
It's the only place we'll get any privacy.
It's a bit dark, but there's a lamp right here.
Hi, Hugh. I wrote a poem about you.
"Hugh. Wavy hair. Mysterious eyes.
Pretty cool for a living guy. Hugh."
'Ello, gov'nor! Picked this up
at ye olde Buckingham Palace gift shoppe.
Everybody out!
It's tea time for me and Hugh.
I made yours without sugar cos you're already sweet.
Okay, I highly doubt anyone's gonna bother us here.
Oh, hi, Hughie.
Dudes, he's in the pooch pad!
Ah! This again!
All right! Family meeting!
Back in a jiff.
You guys are unbelievable.
The minute a good-looking guy with an accent shows up,
you all go completely bonkers.
That is so not true.
I've got these Hugh sweaters in small, medium, and large.
Ooh!
This has to end. I need to study,
or I'm gonna flunk fifth grade.
So from now on, Hugh is off limits.
Now, girls, you heard Lincoln.
Uh, that means you too, Dad.
Oh...
Ugh!
Sorry that took so long to take care of.
Finally, we can get down to business.
Brilliant, let's start with mathematics.
See if you can solve for X.
Is that right? Well done!
Let's move on to social studies.
What are the three major exports of Bosnia-Herzegovina?
Um, aluminium, car seats, and leather footwear?
Smashing. Shall we have a go at Earth sciences?
Lincoln, you're spot-on in all of your lessons.
Even surrealist art.
It's weird, I thought I needed so much help.
It's all in your head, chum. There's no reason
you shouldn't be getting top marks on your exam.
Well, I guess you won't be needing me anymore.
No!
Good heavens, are all Yanks like this?
Careful! Mind the hair!
Girls! He's gettin' away!
No!
Marry me!
How'd the test go, bro? You ace it?
No! I got an F!
Oh. And a frowny face.
That's cold.
I know just "Hugh" to call!
Get it?
-I'm calling Hugh! -No, me!
I don't get it.
I thought I knew all the answers.
Ms DiMartino
is definitely gonna flunk me now.
Wait, Ms DiMartino?
Yeah, she's been our substitute teacher
since Mrs Johnson broke her leg riding a mechanical bull.
Dude, no wonder you're failing.
Ms D is so smokin',
guys go completely bonkers around her.
Yeah, even Bobby nearly flunked because of her.
Of course, that was "BL",
before Lori,
or he never would've noticed her.
But that couldn't happen to me!
Could it?
Hi, Ms DiMartino!
Ba...ba...ba...
Let's conjugate the French verb
"aimer", to love.
J'aime, tu aimes, il aime.
Nous aimons.
Oh! Found my retainer.
You'll have one hour to complete your test.
Eyes on your own paper.
Holy shmoly! You guys are right.
I do go completely bonkers around Ms DiMartino.
Just like you guys did around Hugh.
I don't know why you keep saying that.
By the way, if Hugh and I ever got married and had a baby,
here's what it would look like.
Oh, Leni, you're delusional.
Because I'm gonna marry him,
and our progeny is gonna look like this.
Guys, you got to help me.
I don't want to flunk fifth grade.
Clyde could end up as a tattooed litterbug!
It made sense when he said it.
Maybe you can get Ms. DiMartino
to let you retake the test.
But as long as she's anywhere near me,
I'm still gonna blow it.
Well, then, the solution would be to remove her
from your field of vision.
Observe.
Lori, what is Bobby's full name?
Roberto Alejandro Martinez--
Roberto Alejandro--
Roberto-
And now to delete.
No!
Roberto Alejandro Martinez-Millan
Luis Santiago Jr.
Case closed. Got it.
Don't worry, guys. I have more photos
of Hugh saved in the Cloud.
Thanks for letting me
retake my test, Ms DiMartino.
No problem, Lincoln. Here you go.
You have one hour to complete it,
and keep your eyes on your own paper.
Gosh, and you're funny too.
Clyde! I did it!
-I aced the test! -That's awesome, Lincoln!
So you're not gonna flunk fifth grade?
Nope. Only downside is, I'm going to be spending
a lot of time inside my locker.
Well, here goes. Better shield my eyes
from our teacher's blinding beauty.
Oh, well, thank you!
I'm flattered.
Why don't you come sit in the front row, Lincoln?
Uh, yes, brilliant.
Now that Mrs Johnson's back,
looks like my troubles are over.
Ba...ba...ba...ba...
What happened to Coach Pacowski?
Mrs Johnson ran over his foot with her wheelchair,
so I'll be subbing in gym class for a while.
Let's do some laps, everybody!
Ba...ba...ba...ba...
Ugh! Dang it!
Aargh!
Sounds like someone got trapped in the bathroom again.
Grr! Somebody let me out!
Bobby's coming over to study
and I only have three hours to get ready!
Aah!
Oof! Grr!
This house is literally falling apart!
Lori's right. With 11 kids, four pets,
and two parents who insist on fixing everything themselves,
our house is a bit of a-- how do I put this nicely?
Disaster.
You've got the faulty water pressure.
Eh, I'll go borrow some water from Charles' bowl.
Try to have a little dignit--
And the creaky floorboards.
Lori? Leni? Luan?
Don't forget about the rotting wood.
Luna!
Then there's the clunky furnace.
Well, Captain, after 13 weeks of careful construction,
your ship is finally ready.
And the crummy TV signal.
It's fuzzy again!
D'oh! Whoa!
Oh, something's got me!
Wait, wait! That's perfect!
And the doorknob situation.
Dang it.
-Dang it. -Dang it.
Dang it. Dang it.
And I feel like there's something I'm leaving out.
Aah! Right, the mailbox.
Ridiculous.
There wasn't even a breeze.
Actually, according to my meteorological instruments,
a big storm's a-brewin'.
Perhaps a tornado.
What? No way.
Patchy Drizzle here with an urgent weather bulletin.
A tornado watch has just been issued
for the Royal Woods area.
Try and keep up, Patchy.
All right, kids, everyone down to the basement.
Your father and I have to secure the TV antennae.
I call trampoline!
I'm scared!
Fear not, a tornado watch
doesn't mean a twister's coming,
but rather that conditions are right for one.
Besides, most residential structures
can withstand wind speeds of up to 80 miles per hour.
Or in the case of our house, two miles per hour.
Maybe this old heap will blow away,
and then we can get a new house!
I'll finally get my castle!
Ugh, I can't believe I have to postpone my study date
with Bobby after I did all this.
Dudes, remember the first time Bobby came over to Casa Loud?
Mr and Mrs Loud.
It's an honour to finally meet you.
Boo Boo Bear!
You're literally bleeding.
Oh, no worries, babe.
It's-- it's just marinara sauce. Ahem.
Could I please use your restroom?
Whoa!
So, you're Lori's new love interest.
Dang it.
Fortunately, our love was strong enough
to overcome any obstacle.
Including creepy sisters who spy on my dates.
Please, you can't expect to have
privacy in this house.
Sigh.
Okay, you've been doing that for ten minutes.
What's wrong, Luce?
Don't tell anyone, but...
I've been reading this new book series about a werewolf,
and it feels like I'm cheating on Edwin.
I'd stick with the vampire.
Werewolves are hairy and gross, ugh!
Which is exactly why she should go for one!
But Edwin was her first love.
Don't these books sound a little old for Lucy?
Of course not, dear. When I was a girl,
I read a series about a cute lumberjack.
Groan.
Sigh.
I still fail to grasp your dilemma,
seeing as both would-be suitors are mythological beings.
My point was that our walls are ridiculously thin.
Yeah, not to mention leaky.
Uh-oh.
Got it.
Dang it!
And it wasn't even raining.
Someone just flushed the upstairs toilet.
"Ur-ine" trouble then.
Get it?
Aw, come on, it was funny!
Good news.
Wind speeds have decreased significantly.
We should be out of this asbestos-ridden dungeon soon.
At least it's not flooding
like it did in the last big storm.
I'll get the buckets.
Last one.
Wait, but don't you guys remember what happened next?
Hey, guys, check it out!
Cannonball!
Ew! I'm not swimming in grody basement water.
Hey, Lori! I found your missing earring.
The one from Bobby?
Cannonball!
Yeah, I guess sometimes living in a crummy house isn't all bad.
Yeah, like the time possums got in through
the holes in the roof and chewed up the wiring.
Sorry, kids, till we get new cables
there's gonna be no TV or Internet.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! No need to panic.
I think I know how to "possum" the time.
Guess what ol' Dad found?
-A wireless hotspot? -Even better!
My old "Pioneer Boy" books from when I was a kid.
They're about a plucky young lad and his family
crossing this great nation in a covered wagon.
You guys are gonna love 'em!
Ow!
Fret not, lassie.
One drop of my mugwump elixir
will soothe every ache and pain.
That did turn out to be fun.
That was almost as fun as the time the air conditioner
went crazy and Dad couldn't turn it off.
You know, dudes,
maybe we've been too hard on the ol' crib.
It's got some perks, like the wicked slanty floors.
Yo, Lans, pass the gravy.
You never have
to get up to grab some grub!
Or a fresh roll of TP.
Guys, I need a reload!
And she makes the snag.
The broken doorbell can come in handy too.
I can't remember the last time we paid for pizza.
You know what else comes in handy?
That hole in the bathroom floor.
Um, we got it, Lynn.
Oh, okay. Just wanted to be sure.
Guys, I think Lily wants to share a house story too.
Mind if I translate, Lilster?
Poo-poo. Ahem.
So it was Mom and Dad's anniversary weekend.
Bye! Have fun!
Okay, guys,
Paint-the-Peeling-House to-Give-Mom-and-Dad
the-Greatest Anniversary-Gift-Ever
and-Also-Think-of-a-Shorter Name-for-This-Operation...
into action!
I still think adjacent burial plots
would have been a better gift.
Nothing says romance like eternity.
They're back! Paintbrushes down!
Surprise!
Happy anniversary!
Good gravy.
So you like it?
Uh...
Best. Anniversary gift. Ever!
-That was a great story, Lily. -Poo-poo.
I think she's got another story.
Oh, this time it really is just poo-poo.
What's going on? Is the storm over?
Uh, actually wind speeds have increased significantly.
Meaning the tornado watch
is about to become a tornado warning.
And there it is.
Nobody panic!
I guess it's not such a bad house after all.
I don't want our house to blow away!
-Me neither! -I take back what I said before!
Yeah, we have so many memories in these walls.
I'm sorry I ever ragged on this place.
-Me too. -We're so sorry, house!
Me too! Me three!
You might be old, and creaky,
and full of leaks, but you're ours.
And we love you!
All clear!
Let's go check on the house.
I'll check the hole in the bathroom floor.
Yikes, you guys were hit hard.
Nope, this is how our house always looks.
And we wouldn't want it any other way.
All right, everyone, back inside.
Dang it.
♪ Cramped inside this tiny space ♪
♪ May sound bad but ain't the case ♪
♪ In the Loud house ♪ Loud house
♪ Duck and dodge and push and shove ♪
♪ That's the way we show our love in the Loud house ♪
♪ Loud house
♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪
♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪
♪ Stand in line to take a pee
♪ Never any privacy
♪ Chaos with 11 kids
♪ That's the way it always is ♪
♪ In the Loud house