1 00:00:07,228 --> 00:00:08,798 - ♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪ 2 00:00:08,797 --> 00:00:10,397 ♪ Dodging girls like Ping-Pong balls ♪ 3 00:00:10,399 --> 00:00:12,299 ♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪ 4 00:00:12,300 --> 00:00:13,470 ♪ Leaping over laundry piles 5 00:00:13,468 --> 00:00:15,068 ♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪ 6 00:00:15,070 --> 00:00:19,140 ♪ Guy's got to do what he can to survive ♪ 7 00:00:19,141 --> 00:00:20,171 - ♪ In the Loud house 8 00:00:20,175 --> 00:00:21,305 ♪ In the Loud house 9 00:00:21,309 --> 00:00:22,679 - ♪ Duck, dodge, push, and shove ♪ 10 00:00:22,677 --> 00:00:24,077 ♪ Is how we show our love 11 00:00:24,079 --> 00:00:26,449 - ♪ In the Loud house, in the Loud house ♪ 12 00:00:26,448 --> 00:00:27,678 - ♪ One boy and ten girls 13 00:00:27,682 --> 00:00:30,082 ♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world ♪ 14 00:00:30,085 --> 00:00:33,415 - ♪ Loud Loud Loud 15 00:00:33,422 --> 00:00:34,822 ♪ Loud house 16 00:00:34,823 --> 00:00:36,353 - Poo-poo. 17 00:00:38,526 --> 00:00:41,596 [upbeat music] 18 00:00:41,596 --> 00:00:46,596 ♪ ♪ 19 00:00:46,601 --> 00:00:49,361 - Good, and turn and wave. 20 00:00:49,371 --> 00:00:52,501 More teeth. Less teeth. 21 00:00:52,507 --> 00:00:53,537 Excellent! Keep it up! 22 00:00:53,542 --> 00:00:56,472 You might be wondering why I'm helping Lola practice 23 00:00:56,478 --> 00:00:57,378 for a beauty contest. 24 00:00:57,379 --> 00:01:00,179 Well, tomorrow is the Little Miss Prim and Perfect Pageant, 25 00:01:00,182 --> 00:01:04,212 and the winner gets the greatest prize ever-- 26 00:01:04,219 --> 00:01:07,689 two season passes to Dairyland Amoosement Park! 27 00:01:07,689 --> 00:01:10,389 That's one for Lola and one for coach. 28 00:01:10,392 --> 00:01:15,692 I've been working my butt off all week to make sure she wins. 29 00:01:15,697 --> 00:01:17,767 - [sneezes] 30 00:01:19,733 --> 00:01:20,793 [spits] 31 00:01:20,802 --> 00:01:24,232 - Oh, oh, God! 32 00:01:25,840 --> 00:01:28,550 It's been a long, hard road, 33 00:01:28,543 --> 00:01:30,373 but once we get to Dairyland, 34 00:01:30,378 --> 00:01:32,478 it'll all be worth it. 35 00:01:32,481 --> 00:01:34,341 - Get back here, Hops! 36 00:01:34,349 --> 00:01:35,119 - Lana, watch out! 37 00:01:35,117 --> 00:01:37,957 Do you know how hard it is to steam-clean chiffon? 38 00:01:37,953 --> 00:01:40,583 - Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 39 00:01:40,589 --> 00:01:42,529 - Okay, Lola. Let's move on to your walk. 40 00:01:42,524 --> 00:01:45,794 Remember what Gil DeLily says in his best-selling book, 41 00:01:45,794 --> 00:01:47,894 "Unlocking Your Inner Pageant Queen"-- 42 00:01:47,896 --> 00:01:50,366 "To win the day, you must sashay!" 43 00:01:50,365 --> 00:01:53,565 - I know how to walk, Lincoln. 44 00:01:58,506 --> 00:02:00,906 - [slowed] No! 45 00:02:04,645 --> 00:02:06,015 Okay, minor setback. 46 00:02:06,014 --> 00:02:07,014 We can still win this thing. 47 00:02:07,015 --> 00:02:09,785 - Wake up and smell the hairspray, Lincoln. 48 00:02:09,784 --> 00:02:10,584 It's over! 49 00:02:10,585 --> 00:02:13,485 - You can't just quit! We worked hard on this! 50 00:02:13,488 --> 00:02:15,988 - There'll be other pageants, you know. 51 00:02:15,991 --> 00:02:18,551 - But not with Dairyland tickets. 52 00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:20,660 - Lincoln, I need my beauty rest. 53 00:02:20,662 --> 00:02:22,722 As your pal Gil DeLily would say, 54 00:02:22,731 --> 00:02:27,031 "I can't recover if you're going to hover." 55 00:02:27,035 --> 00:02:30,335 - I can't believe I learned to French braid for nothing. 56 00:02:30,338 --> 00:02:31,938 - Hey, Lincoln. You done with this? 57 00:02:31,940 --> 00:02:34,910 I could use the scrap metal for welding. 58 00:02:34,910 --> 00:02:37,350 - [gasps] 59 00:02:37,611 --> 00:02:39,011 - ♪ Hallelujah 60 00:02:39,014 --> 00:02:40,974 - Uh, why are you looking at me like that? 61 00:02:40,982 --> 00:02:44,482 - Lana, how would you like a season pass to Dairyland? 62 00:02:44,486 --> 00:02:46,516 - [gasps] - ♪ Hallelujah 63 00:02:46,521 --> 00:02:48,721 - Don't toy with me, Lincoln! 64 00:02:48,723 --> 00:02:49,423 - I'm not! 65 00:02:49,424 --> 00:02:53,654 All you have to do is one teensy, tiny, little thing. 66 00:02:53,662 --> 00:02:55,362 - What is it? I'll do anything! 67 00:02:55,363 --> 00:02:56,893 - You just have to take Lola's place 68 00:02:56,898 --> 00:03:00,398 in the Little Miss Prim and Perfect Pageant and win. 69 00:03:00,402 --> 00:03:01,962 - Are you kidding me? Agh! 70 00:03:01,970 --> 00:03:03,640 Do you know who you're talking to? 71 00:03:03,638 --> 00:03:08,608 - Some who's going to love Dairyland's newest ride-- 72 00:03:08,610 --> 00:03:09,350 the Milk Shaker. 73 00:03:09,344 --> 00:03:10,544 It's so fast, you can barf, 74 00:03:10,545 --> 00:03:13,515 fly around a loop, and get hit in the face 75 00:03:13,515 --> 00:03:14,375 with said barf. 76 00:03:14,382 --> 00:03:16,582 - Darn you, Lincoln! 77 00:03:16,585 --> 00:03:17,415 I am in! 78 00:03:17,419 --> 00:03:19,719 But wait. What if Lola finds out? 79 00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:22,521 You know what she's capable of. 80 00:03:22,524 --> 00:03:24,324 [dramatic music] 81 00:03:24,326 --> 00:03:25,396 [both shuddering] 82 00:03:25,393 --> 00:03:29,493 - She won't find out. I promise. 83 00:03:29,497 --> 00:03:32,367 Agh! First off, we got to clean you up. 84 00:03:32,367 --> 00:03:35,907 Dirt on your face gets you last place. 85 00:03:35,904 --> 00:03:37,804 - [snoring] 86 00:03:37,806 --> 00:03:39,536 What are you doing with that? 87 00:03:39,541 --> 00:03:40,831 - Oh, this? [chuckles nervously] 88 00:03:40,842 --> 00:03:43,402 Just, uh, getting it dry-cleaned. 89 00:03:43,411 --> 00:03:46,711 You keep healing, sunshine. 90 00:03:46,715 --> 00:03:49,385 - What is this weird sparkly towel? 91 00:03:49,384 --> 00:03:50,714 - It's called a dress, Lana. 92 00:03:50,719 --> 00:03:52,959 Now, hold still while I work my magic. 93 00:03:52,954 --> 00:03:57,084 - Agh! It smells like princess farts! 94 00:03:57,092 --> 00:03:58,722 - [sniffing] 95 00:03:58,727 --> 00:04:02,127 [growls] 96 00:04:02,130 --> 00:04:03,000 - Oh, hey, Lola! 97 00:04:02,998 --> 00:04:04,998 Your hair spray makes a great deodorant. 98 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:08,640 It really covers up that musky man smell. 99 00:04:08,637 --> 00:04:10,407 - Hmm... 100 00:04:10,405 --> 00:04:11,105 - [sighs] 101 00:04:11,106 --> 00:04:12,606 Help me get my arms unstuck? 102 00:04:12,607 --> 00:04:17,007 - You're gonna feel some slight discomfort and... 103 00:04:17,012 --> 00:04:18,442 - [screaming] 104 00:04:18,446 --> 00:04:22,516 Time to work on what Gil DeLily calls the three Ws: 105 00:04:22,517 --> 00:04:25,687 walk, wave, and work it. 106 00:04:26,020 --> 00:04:28,730 Okay, we're walking, we're waving, 107 00:04:28,723 --> 00:04:31,523 but we're just not working it. 108 00:04:31,526 --> 00:04:33,796 Tools in your dress? Seriously? 109 00:04:33,795 --> 00:04:35,665 - Handyman's code, Lincoln. 110 00:04:35,664 --> 00:04:36,764 Always be prepared. 111 00:04:36,765 --> 00:04:38,465 - You are not a handyman! 112 00:04:38,466 --> 00:04:41,066 You are a pageant queen! 113 00:04:41,069 --> 00:04:44,609 What? It's supposed to snow tonight. 114 00:04:44,606 --> 00:04:46,436 - Lola, what can a six-year-old do 115 00:04:46,441 --> 00:04:48,771 to make the world a better place? 116 00:04:48,777 --> 00:04:50,407 - Um... 117 00:04:50,412 --> 00:04:52,512 - Lana! You can't scratch your butt! 118 00:04:52,514 --> 00:04:54,644 - What? It helps me think. 119 00:04:54,649 --> 00:04:55,619 - Well, knock it off! 120 00:04:55,617 --> 00:04:58,657 "Those who scratch lose the match." 121 00:04:58,653 --> 00:05:00,453 Okay, talent portion. 122 00:05:00,455 --> 00:05:01,155 What ya got? 123 00:05:01,156 --> 00:05:02,056 [armpit farts] 124 00:05:02,057 --> 00:05:05,527 - Impressive, but I'm gonna pass. 125 00:05:05,893 --> 00:05:08,423 How about a ribbon dance? 126 00:05:08,430 --> 00:05:10,900 It shows elegance and poise. 127 00:05:10,899 --> 00:05:13,099 - Excuse me while I go barf. 128 00:05:13,101 --> 00:05:16,001 - Lana, I'm busting my hump trying to turn you 129 00:05:16,004 --> 00:05:18,534 into a pageant queen, and all I'm getting is lip. 130 00:05:18,540 --> 00:05:20,680 Do you want those Dairyland tickets or not? 131 00:05:20,675 --> 00:05:22,475 - Okay, okay. You're right. 132 00:05:22,477 --> 00:05:25,147 - As Gil says, "She who gives 'tude"-- 133 00:05:25,146 --> 00:05:27,176 - I already agreed! 134 00:05:27,182 --> 00:05:30,482 [pageant music] 135 00:05:30,485 --> 00:05:38,825 ♪ ♪ 136 00:05:45,632 --> 00:05:47,062 - Whoo-hoo! Lana, look at you! 137 00:05:47,068 --> 00:05:49,068 You've done it! You're prim and perfect! 138 00:05:49,070 --> 00:05:52,840 - I never thought I'd say it, but this feels pretty good. 139 00:05:52,841 --> 00:05:55,571 I don't even mind the sparkly towel. 140 00:05:55,577 --> 00:05:58,977 both: Dairyland, here we come! 141 00:06:02,015 --> 00:06:04,185 - Whoa, look at those girls! 142 00:06:04,185 --> 00:06:07,985 They're all so clean and sparkly. 143 00:06:07,989 --> 00:06:08,959 - Well, so are you. 144 00:06:08,957 --> 00:06:12,257 You're as good as any of them! 145 00:06:12,260 --> 00:06:14,660 I didn't know this was going to be on TV. 146 00:06:14,662 --> 00:06:16,762 Good thing we don't get the Princess Channel. 147 00:06:16,765 --> 00:06:19,535 - Thanks for getting me the Princess Channel, daddy. 148 00:06:19,534 --> 00:06:20,494 - No problem, sweetie. 149 00:06:20,502 --> 00:06:22,632 It was either that or the sports channel. 150 00:06:22,637 --> 00:06:24,777 And who needs that, huh? [crying] 151 00:06:24,773 --> 00:06:28,503 - Welcome to the Little Miss Prim and Perfect Pageant. 152 00:06:28,510 --> 00:06:30,110 I'm your host, Donnie Dufresne. 153 00:06:30,111 --> 00:06:33,741 Let's meet America's junior sweethearts. 154 00:06:33,748 --> 00:06:38,688 Hailing from Royals Woods, Miss Lola Loud! 155 00:06:38,686 --> 00:06:41,216 - [gasps] What is going on? 156 00:06:41,222 --> 00:06:46,022 - I'd like to thank my coach and brother, Lincoln. 157 00:06:46,027 --> 00:06:49,097 - Lincoln! I should have known! 158 00:06:49,097 --> 00:06:52,637 - And I just want to say it is great to be here. 159 00:06:52,634 --> 00:06:53,834 [burps] [all exclaiming] 160 00:06:53,835 --> 00:06:56,205 Sorry you were downwind of that, Donnie. 161 00:06:56,204 --> 00:06:58,704 - They're ruining me! 162 00:06:58,706 --> 00:07:02,006 And they will pay! 163 00:07:03,777 --> 00:07:05,047 [growls] 164 00:07:05,046 --> 00:07:07,946 - Woot! Sports channel, here I come! 165 00:07:07,949 --> 00:07:09,719 [cheers and applause] 166 00:07:09,717 --> 00:07:12,087 - Lana, what were you thinking? 167 00:07:12,086 --> 00:07:12,986 Remember what Gil says-- 168 00:07:12,987 --> 00:07:15,887 "If you belch onstage, the judges will rage." 169 00:07:15,890 --> 00:07:17,290 - Gil actually has a rhyme for that? 170 00:07:17,292 --> 00:07:20,022 - That's why he's a pageant powerhouse. 171 00:07:20,028 --> 00:07:22,228 Now, the evening gown competition is next. 172 00:07:22,230 --> 00:07:23,730 If we want to win those tickets, 173 00:07:23,731 --> 00:07:28,031 we cannot afford any more slip-ups. 174 00:07:29,736 --> 00:07:32,136 [applause] 175 00:07:32,673 --> 00:07:34,303 - Oh! Hang on, everybody! 176 00:07:34,309 --> 00:07:37,149 Loose floorboard! 177 00:07:37,145 --> 00:07:40,075 That'll hold. Carry on! 178 00:07:40,081 --> 00:07:42,811 [girls laughing] 179 00:07:42,817 --> 00:07:44,647 - Lana! What was that? 180 00:07:44,652 --> 00:07:46,352 We talked about the tools! 181 00:07:46,354 --> 00:07:47,714 - I couldn't help it! 182 00:07:47,722 --> 00:07:49,282 Fixing stuff is what I do! 183 00:07:49,290 --> 00:07:51,290 - You're supposed to be prim and perfect! 184 00:07:51,292 --> 00:07:52,852 Now, do you want to go to Dairyland 185 00:07:52,861 --> 00:07:55,361 and get hit in the face with your own barf or not? 186 00:07:55,363 --> 00:07:56,223 I know you can do this. 187 00:07:56,231 --> 00:08:00,991 The interview is next. Go out there and nail it! 188 00:08:01,002 --> 00:08:02,362 Not with that. 189 00:08:02,370 --> 00:08:05,280 - Lola, what can six-year-olds do 190 00:08:05,273 --> 00:08:07,873 to eliminate the national debt? 191 00:08:07,876 --> 00:08:09,176 - Um... 192 00:08:09,177 --> 00:08:13,177 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 193 00:08:13,181 --> 00:08:14,171 - Plenty, Donnie. 194 00:08:14,182 --> 00:08:18,912 Just because we're six doesn't mean we can't make a difference. 195 00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:20,190 [applauding] 196 00:08:20,188 --> 00:08:22,688 [frog croaks] Oh! Hops! 197 00:08:22,690 --> 00:08:25,930 [all screaming] 198 00:08:25,927 --> 00:08:28,897 - [grunting] 199 00:08:28,897 --> 00:08:30,897 - Lana, what is the problem? 200 00:08:30,899 --> 00:08:32,869 We went over everything in Gil's book 201 00:08:32,867 --> 00:08:35,767 and the companion DVD and the podcast! 202 00:08:35,770 --> 00:08:38,340 How are you still not getting it? 203 00:08:38,339 --> 00:08:40,079 - I'm sorry, Lincoln. 204 00:08:40,074 --> 00:08:40,904 No matter what I do, 205 00:08:40,909 --> 00:08:44,279 I can't be prim and perfect like these girls. 206 00:08:44,279 --> 00:08:48,149 Maybe there's something wrong with me. 207 00:08:49,016 --> 00:08:51,046 [frog croaks] 208 00:08:53,020 --> 00:08:57,090 - Lana! Wait! There's nothing wrong with you! 209 00:08:57,091 --> 00:08:58,251 I'm the one who messed up. 210 00:08:58,259 --> 00:09:00,899 I got so caught up in winning those tickets, 211 00:09:00,895 --> 00:09:02,425 I turned into Gil DeLily... 212 00:09:02,430 --> 00:09:05,140 who, when you stop to think about it, 213 00:09:05,133 --> 00:09:07,063 probably needs to get a life. 214 00:09:07,068 --> 00:09:11,268 - Yeah, but still, why can't I be like them? 215 00:09:11,272 --> 00:09:12,732 - Because you're you. 216 00:09:12,740 --> 00:09:17,050 You're messy and muddy and keep a lot of reptiles in your pants. 217 00:09:17,045 --> 00:09:19,315 But that's what makes you awesome. 218 00:09:19,314 --> 00:09:23,814 And I was crazy to try and change you. 219 00:09:23,818 --> 00:09:25,758 - Aw, thanks, Lincoln. 220 00:09:25,753 --> 00:09:26,713 - Ladies and gentlemen, 221 00:09:26,721 --> 00:09:31,321 Miss Lola Loud and her fabulous ribbon dance! 222 00:09:31,326 --> 00:09:33,156 - Well, that's me. 223 00:09:33,161 --> 00:09:34,721 I'll do my best. 224 00:09:34,729 --> 00:09:35,899 - Forget the ribbon dance. 225 00:09:35,897 --> 00:09:39,167 Why don't you go do your own talent? 226 00:09:39,167 --> 00:09:39,797 - Really? 227 00:09:39,801 --> 00:09:43,131 Okay, but you can kiss those Dairyland tickets good-bye. 228 00:09:43,137 --> 00:09:45,237 - I don't care about them anymore. 229 00:09:45,239 --> 00:09:47,479 Go be yourself. 230 00:09:49,943 --> 00:09:52,773 - [growls] 231 00:09:52,780 --> 00:09:55,290 - Yo, Hops! Give me a bassline. 232 00:09:55,283 --> 00:09:56,983 - [croaking] 233 00:09:56,985 --> 00:09:59,815 - [snapping fingers] [armpit farts] 234 00:09:59,821 --> 00:10:00,451 [scratching] 235 00:10:00,455 --> 00:10:03,225 - [blows raspberry] - [croaking] 236 00:10:03,224 --> 00:10:06,224 ♪ 237 00:10:06,227 --> 00:10:10,027 - Whoo-hoo! That's my sister! 238 00:10:10,031 --> 00:10:12,961 - And this is your other sister! 239 00:10:12,967 --> 00:10:15,807 - Wait! It's my fault, not Lana's. 240 00:10:15,803 --> 00:10:17,363 It was all my idea. 241 00:10:17,372 --> 00:10:20,002 ♪ 242 00:10:20,008 --> 00:10:21,748 [cheers and applause] 243 00:10:21,743 --> 00:10:24,003 - I have worked for years 244 00:10:24,012 --> 00:10:27,042 to build my pageant reputation, 245 00:10:27,048 --> 00:10:29,388 and you just ruined it! 246 00:10:29,384 --> 00:10:31,014 - Lola! Listen! 247 00:10:31,019 --> 00:10:34,019 - And the winner is... 248 00:10:34,022 --> 00:10:34,982 Lola Loud! 249 00:10:34,989 --> 00:10:37,989 [cheers and applause] - Whoo-hoo! 250 00:10:37,992 --> 00:10:38,722 - [gasps] Lola! 251 00:10:38,726 --> 00:10:40,856 I'm so sorry I pretended to be you. 252 00:10:40,862 --> 00:10:41,862 Please don't be mad at me. 253 00:10:41,863 --> 00:10:44,523 - I don't like what you did, but you did win. 254 00:10:44,532 --> 00:10:48,332 And I respect a winner. 255 00:10:48,336 --> 00:10:50,336 - I think this belongs to you. 256 00:10:50,338 --> 00:10:53,038 - No, you earned it... 257 00:10:53,041 --> 00:10:53,971 you both did 258 00:10:53,975 --> 00:10:56,105 and the Dairyland tickets. 259 00:10:56,110 --> 00:10:58,110 - ♪ Hallelujah 260 00:10:58,112 --> 00:10:59,442 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 261 00:10:59,447 --> 00:11:02,387 both: We're going to Dairyland! 262 00:11:02,383 --> 00:11:05,813 - Welp, I've learned two very valuable lessons-- 263 00:11:05,820 --> 00:11:08,290 one, you should never try to turn someone 264 00:11:08,289 --> 00:11:09,489 into something they're not. 265 00:11:09,490 --> 00:11:12,830 And, two, If you ever ride the Milk Shaker, 266 00:11:12,827 --> 00:11:14,957 keep your mouth closed. 267 00:11:17,497 --> 00:11:19,237 [vomits] - Awesome! 268 00:11:19,233 --> 00:11:22,433 - My mouth was open! 269 00:11:24,604 --> 00:11:27,674 [upbeat music]