- ♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪
♪ Dodging girls like ping pong balls ♪
♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪
♪ Leaping over laundry piles
♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪
♪ Guy's gotta do what he can to survive ♪
♪ In the Loud House, in the Loud House ♪
♪ Duck, dodge, push and shove ♪
♪ This is how we show our love ♪
♪ In the Loud House, in the Loud House ♪
♪ One boy and ten girls
♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world ♪
♪ Loud! Loud! Loud!
♪ Loud House! - Boo boo.
- ♪
- [objects shattering]
- [car zooming] - [dog barking]
- LISA: Her moving style is very safe here.
- MOM: Here's your dinner, Lincoln.
- Thanks, Mom.
Hey, will you help me with my science project?
I have to build a volcano.
- MOM: Sure, honey. Just give me five minutes.
Leni and I are gonna practice putting on makeup.
- Hey, Dad, can you help me with my volcano?
- DAD: Sure, son, just give me five minutes
while I give Lynn some baseball pointers.
- [object shatters] - [cat screeches]
- DAD: And there's your first pointer, Lynn--
never play ball in the house.
- MOM: Well, you're doing much better, Leni,
but you're still venturing into...clown territory.
- Mom, can we work on my volcano now?
- MOM: Oh, five minutes, honey.
I promised Lori I'd take a magazine quiz with her.
- But I could really use some help.
Dad, can you-- - Five more minutes, pal.
I promised Luna I'd help her lay down some funky grooves!
- Hey, Dad, I clogged the toilet,
so you could teach me how to fix it!
- DAD: Five minutes, Lincoln. I mean, Lana.
- [saxophone blasting] - [cat screeching]
- [saxophone continues]
- DAD: Ow!
- In a family as big as mine,
getting attention from your parents is no easy thing.
[sighing] How am I ever gonna finish this?
Wow, it's finished?
Your volcano is awesome, Clyde.
I love how you even put people on it.
- Thanks! That's Lori and me.
We're climbing down to get married
'cause Bobby fell in,
and is being devoured by lava.
- Ouch! It really did a number on his face.
This project isn't due for a week.
How'd you get it done so fast?
- My dads helped.
We spent the whole weekend working on it.
- My parents never give me that kind of attention.
They're always rushing off to help one of my sisters.
- Why don't you bring your volcano
to my house after school?
My dads will have plenty of time to help you.
- Really? That would be great.
- Oh, hang on, Lincoln.
I'm gonna get Volcano Lori a juice.
Running from Bobby's tormented screams has made her thirsty.
- [school bell ringing]
- Oh, these long school days, man.
- Tell me about it.
But at least we're home now.
- LINCOLN: Wow!
I always forget how different your house is from mine!
- Uh, you're shouting, Lincoln.
- Oh, right. Sorry. Force of habit.
- Hi, fellas. Come on in.
- Hi, Mr. McBride. Hi, Mr. McBride.
- Ooh, nice structure, Lincoln.
Ready to get to work?
- You mean like now?
- HAROLD: [laughing] Of course.
- Oh, hang on, Lincoln.
You have a loose button on your shirt.
- Oh, well, I, uh...
- [laughing] No worries.
- Thanks, Mr. McBride.
- Great good heavens!
It looks like the sole of your shoe is about to fall off.
- Oh, that's just-- - No worries.
I'll just give it a little tappity tap.
- Wow, you're not gonna just use a stapler on that?
- Hold up, Lincoln. Your sideburns are uneven.
- I know. Usually, I just tilt my head.
- No worries. - [razors buzzing]
- HAROLD: Perfect! - HOWARD: Hot towel?
Sorry dinner's nothing fancy--
just roasted organic chicken with a homemade marinade.
- And vegetables from our garden.
Help yourself, Lincoln.
- There's no foil to peel back?
- HAROLD: [chuckling] Foil. LOL.
That's a hot one, Lincoln.
- Clyde, how was your day?
- It was great.
I lasted 37 seconds in dodgeball.
- Did you hear that, Hare Bear? Thirty-seven seconds.
- Good job, son.
And, Lincoln, how was your day?
- [coughing] What? Me?
You wanna know how my day was? Now?
- [cellphone] ♪ Hallelujah! - Oops, sorry.
- You know the rules, Dad.
No phones at the dinner table.
- Seriously?
What about ants, or pitching machines,
or toilet snakes?
- HAROLD: [laughing]
You're so funny, Lincoln.
Here, have seconds.
- [cellphone] ♪ Hallelujah!
- Oh, I thought I turned this off.
Sorry we didn't finish your volcano tonight, Lincoln.
Why don't you come back tomorrow?
- It's mani-pedi night at the McBride house.
- [voice wobbling] Ooh, I love Italian food.
- [laughing] You are too much, Lincoln.
- [vibrating chair stops]
- I gotta say--
getting some undivided attention is pretty sweet,
and now, if you'll excuse me,
I've gotta give some undivided attention to my hammies.
[voice wobbling] Ohhh...yeah...
- LILY: [crying] - LANA: Ya-hoo!
- LUAN: [laughing] - [food splatting]
- Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! - [explosion]
- [sighing] [slams door]
- Hey, Lincoln.
You look different.
- My sideburns are even.
- No, it's more than that.
Your skin is glowing, you look taller,
and you smell like-- [sniffing]
organic brussels sprouts?
Okay, what gives?
- I spent tonight at Clyde's.
His dads helped me with my volcano,
and served me food with no foil,
and asked me about my day.
- Get out! That sounds amazing!
Hey, do you think he could help me with my baseball swing?
- Sure. I think Clyde said one of his dads
played ball in college.
Why don't you come over after school tomorrow?
- Oh, that would be awesome. [punching]
- Ow! Lynn, do you mind?
Clyde's dads just gave me my vaccinations.
- HOWARD: Goodbye. - HAROLD: Take care.
- I just can't believe Mr. McBride
spent a whole hour coaching me and how about that dinner?
What was that special thing they cooked again?
- Meat? - Yeah.
It was amazing.
Ah, I'd punch you, but my arm is sore from the vaccinations.
- Hey, peeps. Wait, you look different.
Your nail beds are rockin'. [sniffing]
And do I smell meat?
What's going on?
- We've been hanging out with Clyde's dads.
They've been giving us all kinds of one-on-one time.
- Rad! Hey, do you think they could jam with me?
Dad's got a wicked canker
and he can't blow the sax anymore.
- Sure. One of Clyde's dads told me
he was in a band in college.
- Okay, but this is it.
If any more of you find out about Clyde's dads,
the undivided attention is going to get pretty divided.
- Don't worry, bro.
That was the car window.
- LYNN & LINCOLN: Yeah, we get it.
- [guitar & saxophone jamming]
- LINCOLN: Well, this is okay.
I can handle sharing with a couple of sisters.
It could be worse.
- And the woodpecker said,
that's why I tell knock-knock jokes.
[laughing]
- [beats drum, hits cymbal] - Luan?
- Mr. McBride, would you say I'm more
an Autumn or a Winter?
- You are definitely a Summer.
- Literally, right? - Lori?
- Lori? My future wife? Here with my dads?
What do I do? What do I do?
Oh, I know. [sighing]
- Ya-hoo! Mr. McBride, yo!
- Oh, I can't believe you guys
have sodium salicylate on the premises.
- GIRLS: Mr. McBride!
- ALL: [chattering]
- Mr. McBride? Mr. McBride?
- Harold! - What is it, Howie?
[gasping] Great Betty Buckley!
- Poo poo! - BOTH: The carpet!
- Poo poo, poo poo!
- Hey, you blabbed our secret to everyone?
- No, bro, I would never do that.
But I may have sung it in the shower.
♪ Undivided attention
♪ So good but it can't be mentioned ♪
♪ One-on-one time is so really cool ♪
♪ Hangin' with Clyde's dads after school ♪
Sorry. I was just so amped.
- LUCY: Dearly beloved, we are gathered today
to say goodbye-- - Guys, I can't find my bedroom.
- Remember, Leni, you're not in your own house.
- No talking at your own funeral.
- GIRLS: [chattering]
- Mr. McBride, can you help me with my volcano?
It's due tomorrow.
- Sure thing, Lincoln. Just give me five minutes.
Luan wants me to try out this pie.
- Hey, Mr. McB, wanna help me with my volcano?
- Absolutely--uh, just give me five minutes
while I help Lola with her double pageant wings.
- [heavy sigh] - [pie splats]
- So, that's what she meant by "try out this pie."
Give me five more minutes, Lincoln.
Gotta get this meringue out of my eye.
- Where's Lori? Jam with Luna. Find Lily.
- There we go.
Now who was it that needed my help?
- [explosion] - Lisa!
- This stinks, Clyde.
I finally get some attention
and my sisters come over here and hog it.
They all gotta go.
- I totally agree--
except for Lori.
I'm studying all her quiz answers
and if I change everything about myself,
we'll be soulmates.
- You know, if you wanna impress Lori,
you can just talk to her.
- Yes, talk to her. That's a valid--
[groans, head clunks]
- I've had just about enough of this.
Now listen up! - [object shatters]
- I guess I picked the wrong day to stop shouting.
I said-- - Thank you, Lincoln.
I got it!
I am going to dominate
the Little Miss Ambidextrous Pageant.
- You're the best, Lincoln.
Clyde's dads really helped with my makeup.
Now if I can just find my bedroom.
Nope, that's Lisa's room.
- Lincoln, did you know Mr. McBride
put himself through theater school working as a plumber?
He spent a whole hour teaching me about flush valves.
- Wow, maybe I had it wrong.
My sisters aren't trying to hog Clyde's dads.
They just want a little attention, too,
and you know what?
I'm gonna let them have it.
But not this leftover meat. That's coming with me.
Whew!
- MOM: Oh, Lincoln, there you are.
I got some more materials for your volcano.
- DAD: And I made my special marinara sauce for lava.
- Wow, thanks!
You guys remembered my volcano.
- DAD: Of course, we did. We always planned to help.
We just needed to find some time.
- MOM: We're sorry it took so long, honey.
Did you do something to your sideburns?
- [car brakes screeching, car doors slamming]
[car tires squealing]
- We broke Clyde's dads. - MOM: You did what?
- We were having a great time,
when all of a sudden, they just snapped,
herded us into their car, and drove us home.
- I have no idea what precipitated this.
I simply suggested a sleepover.
- Not everyone can handle 11 kids
like Mom and Dad can.
- Hey, Dad, what did you think of my future bride--Lori?
- Which one was she?
There were so many. [shuddering]
- I'm sorry. Frozen dinners were all I could manage.
- Dad, I think you forgot to--
- HOWARD & HAROLD: [snoring] - [shuddering]
- I guess I really underestimated my parents.
Even if it takes a while,
they eventually find time for all of us--every day.
No wonder Dad has a wicked canker.
- GIRLS: [chattering]
- MOM & DAD: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Hold it!
Five minutes, girls. We're helping Lincoln now.
- It's finished!
Ahem, drum roll, please.
Three...two...
...one! - [marinara sauce splats]
- ♪