1
00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:08,464
- ♪ Crashing through
the crowded halls ♪
2
00:00:08,463 --> 00:00:09,793
♪ Dodging girls
like ping pong balls ♪
3
00:00:09,798 --> 00:00:12,068
♪ Just to reach
the bathroom on time ♪
4
00:00:12,067 --> 00:00:13,337
♪ Leaping over laundry piles
5
00:00:13,335 --> 00:00:14,535
♪ Diapers you can
smell for miles ♪
6
00:00:14,536 --> 00:00:18,476
♪ Guy's gotta do
what he can to survive ♪
7
00:00:18,473 --> 00:00:21,243
♪ In the Loud House,
in the Loud House ♪
8
00:00:21,243 --> 00:00:22,543
♪ Duck, dodge,
push and shove ♪
9
00:00:22,544 --> 00:00:23,644
♪ This is how
we show our love ♪
10
00:00:23,645 --> 00:00:26,615
♪ In the Loud House,
in the Loud House ♪
11
00:00:26,615 --> 00:00:27,545
♪ One boy and ten girls
12
00:00:27,549 --> 00:00:30,289
♪ Wouldn't trade it
for the world ♪
13
00:00:30,285 --> 00:00:33,315
♪ Loud! Loud! Loud!
14
00:00:33,321 --> 00:00:36,081
♪ Loud House!
- Boo boo.
15
00:00:38,559 --> 00:00:47,499
- ♪
16
00:00:47,502 --> 00:00:50,862
- Ah, nothing like reading
comics on a peaceful summer--
17
00:00:50,872 --> 00:00:52,632
- [horn honking]
- [gasps]
18
00:00:52,641 --> 00:00:54,371
- Uh, a little help?
19
00:00:54,376 --> 00:00:56,706
- Back from another
birthday party?
20
00:00:56,711 --> 00:00:59,171
- Uh, my third gig
this weekend.
21
00:00:59,181 --> 00:01:02,241
I could really use
an assistant.
22
00:01:02,250 --> 00:01:04,820
Hey, what about you?
23
00:01:04,820 --> 00:01:06,220
You're great with Gary.
24
00:01:06,221 --> 00:01:08,681
- [Gary chomps]
- Hey, stop that!
25
00:01:08,690 --> 00:01:11,330
I thought Lucy
was helping you.
26
00:01:11,326 --> 00:01:12,326
- ♪
27
00:01:12,327 --> 00:01:16,467
- And now, if my assistant will
just hand me one more balloon,
28
00:01:16,465 --> 00:01:18,765
we'll have a pterodactyl.
29
00:01:18,767 --> 00:01:19,567
- [birds chirping]
30
00:01:19,568 --> 00:01:22,708
- [balloons pop]
- You killed the dinosaur!
31
00:01:22,704 --> 00:01:25,604
- KIDS:
[booing]
32
00:01:25,607 --> 00:01:27,177
- [buzzer rings]
33
00:01:27,175 --> 00:01:30,375
- [chicken squeaks]
- Lucy didn't work out.
34
00:01:30,378 --> 00:01:32,278
Neither did Lynn.
35
00:01:32,913 --> 00:01:36,483
What do you say
we add some melon?
36
00:01:36,485 --> 00:01:38,385
- KIDS:
[cheering]
37
00:01:38,386 --> 00:01:40,756
- [watermelon thuds]
- KIDS: [booing]
38
00:01:40,755 --> 00:01:43,225
- [buzzer rings]
39
00:01:43,225 --> 00:01:44,495
- Or Leni.
40
00:01:44,493 --> 00:01:46,493
Why are clowns
never bored?
41
00:01:46,495 --> 00:01:50,895
'Cause we're good
at keeping occu-pied.
42
00:01:50,899 --> 00:01:51,839
[clears throat]
43
00:01:51,833 --> 00:01:56,303
I said, good at keeping
occu-pied.
44
00:02:01,809 --> 00:02:04,379
- KIDS:
[cheering]
45
00:02:04,379 --> 00:02:05,919
- [buzzer rings]
46
00:02:05,914 --> 00:02:07,514
- Or Lisa.
47
00:02:07,516 --> 00:02:08,916
- [trumpet fanfare]
48
00:02:08,917 --> 00:02:10,387
- Hey, birthday boy.
49
00:02:10,385 --> 00:02:13,655
Why don't you take
the seat of honor?
50
00:02:13,655 --> 00:02:14,785
- [farting noise]
51
00:02:14,789 --> 00:02:17,789
- KIDS:
[laughing]
52
00:02:17,792 --> 00:02:19,522
- No, no!
No one eat that cake!
53
00:02:19,528 --> 00:02:23,498
It clearly causes
gastrointestinal distress.
54
00:02:23,498 --> 00:02:26,938
- KIDS:
[crying]
55
00:02:26,935 --> 00:02:28,365
- [buzzer rings]
56
00:02:28,370 --> 00:02:31,780
- Well, I am so honored to
be your fifth choice.
57
00:02:31,773 --> 00:02:34,403
- Come on, Lincoln.
Please?
58
00:02:34,409 --> 00:02:36,279
I really need your help.
59
00:02:36,278 --> 00:02:36,908
- I don't know.
60
00:02:36,912 --> 00:02:38,342
I'm not really
the performing type.
61
00:02:38,346 --> 00:02:41,246
I don't want to make
a fool of myself on stage.
62
00:02:41,249 --> 00:02:43,349
- Don't worry.
That's my job.
63
00:02:43,351 --> 00:02:45,981
All you have to do
is help with the props.
64
00:02:45,987 --> 00:02:47,857
- Uh, I don't
think it's for--
65
00:02:47,856 --> 00:02:50,686
What's that?
- Ah, just birthday cake.
66
00:02:50,692 --> 00:02:52,722
I always get sent home
with leftovers.
67
00:02:52,727 --> 00:02:53,827
- Oh...
[drooling]
68
00:02:53,828 --> 00:02:56,428
- Usually I share it
with my assistant.
69
00:02:56,431 --> 00:02:59,431
But since this job
isn't for you--
70
00:02:59,434 --> 00:03:02,304
- When did I say that?
71
00:03:02,304 --> 00:03:04,434
- [bell ringing]
72
00:03:05,973 --> 00:03:08,573
- LUAN: Why are
clowns never bored?
73
00:03:08,577 --> 00:03:12,277
'Cause we're good at
keeping occu-pied!
74
00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:15,420
- LINCOLN: [screams]
- [loud crash]
75
00:03:15,417 --> 00:03:16,417
- Sorry!
76
00:03:16,418 --> 00:03:20,518
- KIDS:
[laughing, cheering]
77
00:03:20,522 --> 00:03:22,482
- That was awesome.
78
00:03:22,490 --> 00:03:23,660
The part when I tripped,
79
00:03:23,658 --> 00:03:26,558
and then the audience laughed,
and then clapped?
80
00:03:26,561 --> 00:03:27,451
Amazing!
81
00:03:27,462 --> 00:03:28,562
- Glad you enjoyed it.
82
00:03:28,563 --> 00:03:29,993
Now here, I need you
to clean this.
83
00:03:29,998 --> 00:03:33,068
Gary pooped in it.
- [foghorn bellows]
84
00:03:33,901 --> 00:03:37,031
- What do you say
we add some melon?
85
00:03:37,038 --> 00:03:40,478
- KIDS:
[cheering]
86
00:03:40,475 --> 00:03:41,775
- Whoa, nelly!
87
00:03:41,776 --> 00:03:46,676
- KIDS:
[laughing]
88
00:03:46,947 --> 00:03:49,617
- Man, great crowd, huh?
- Yeah, super.
89
00:03:49,618 --> 00:03:51,888
So, what was that all about
with the watermelon?
90
00:03:51,886 --> 00:03:55,456
- Well, you know,
audiences seem to love it
91
00:03:55,457 --> 00:03:56,187
when I fall down, so--
92
00:03:56,191 --> 00:03:57,681
- Let me worry
about the audience.
93
00:03:57,692 --> 00:04:01,622
You take care of deodorizing
these clown shoes.
94
00:04:04,765 --> 00:04:06,535
- Whoopsy-daisy!
95
00:04:06,534 --> 00:04:09,734
- [loud crash]
- LENI & LANA: [laughing]
96
00:04:09,738 --> 00:04:12,978
- See? I do know what
audiences like.
97
00:04:13,574 --> 00:04:17,774
- And now, if my assistant will
hand me one more balloon,
98
00:04:17,779 --> 00:04:19,719
we'll have a pterodactyl.
99
00:04:19,714 --> 00:04:22,014
- [high-pitched voice]
I went a little overboard
100
00:04:22,017 --> 00:04:22,717
with the helium.
101
00:04:22,717 --> 00:04:24,657
Whoa, good gravy!
- [loud crash]
102
00:04:24,653 --> 00:04:28,683
- KIDS:
[laughing, cheering]
103
00:04:29,523 --> 00:04:31,893
- What did one plate
say to the other?
104
00:04:31,893 --> 00:04:35,963
Lunch is on me.
- KIDS: [laughing]
105
00:04:36,130 --> 00:04:39,940
- Gadzooks!
- KIDS: [laughing]
106
00:04:39,934 --> 00:04:43,104
- I guess lunch is on me.
- KIDS: [laughing]
107
00:04:44,538 --> 00:04:47,938
- [laughs]
He is hilarious.
108
00:04:47,942 --> 00:04:50,442
- I know. LOL.
109
00:04:50,445 --> 00:04:52,475
I just learned
what that means.
110
00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:53,950
- [trumpet fanfare]
111
00:04:53,948 --> 00:04:55,718
- All right,
birthday boy.
112
00:04:55,717 --> 00:04:58,417
Why don't you take
the seat of honor?
113
00:04:58,420 --> 00:04:59,590
- [farting noise]
114
00:04:59,587 --> 00:05:01,557
- Holy macaroni!
- [loud crash]
115
00:05:01,556 --> 00:05:04,426
- KIDS:
[laughing]
116
00:05:05,092 --> 00:05:09,492
[excited chatter]
117
00:05:10,431 --> 00:05:12,691
- Boy, we are killing it.
118
00:05:12,701 --> 00:05:13,761
But I've been thinking,
119
00:05:13,768 --> 00:05:16,168
maybe you should do a little
less of the talky stuff
120
00:05:16,171 --> 00:05:17,961
and more of
the pratfalls.
121
00:05:17,972 --> 00:05:20,432
- Are you kidding me?
- What?
122
00:05:20,442 --> 00:05:21,402
- Look, Lincoln.
123
00:05:21,409 --> 00:05:22,609
Just because you
got a few laughs
124
00:05:22,610 --> 00:05:23,910
does not make you
an expert on clowning.
125
00:05:23,912 --> 00:05:26,672
There's a lot more to it than
just falling on your butt.
126
00:05:26,681 --> 00:05:28,911
- Well, the audience
sure seems to like my--
127
00:05:28,917 --> 00:05:31,487
- Lincoln, enough!
No more pratfalls.
128
00:05:31,486 --> 00:05:34,186
I am the clown.
You are the assistant.
129
00:05:34,189 --> 00:05:36,589
Now go refill these
whoopee cushions.
130
00:05:36,591 --> 00:05:37,951
- But they're
already inflated.
131
00:05:37,959 --> 00:05:40,799
- [farting noises]
- Not anymore.
132
00:05:41,195 --> 00:05:42,595
- [door slams]
- Oh, yeah?
133
00:05:42,597 --> 00:05:46,137
Well, that would've been funnier
if you'd fallen on your butt!
134
00:05:46,134 --> 00:05:49,734
How dare she speak
to me like that!
135
00:05:49,738 --> 00:05:52,508
After everything I've
done for this business?
136
00:05:52,507 --> 00:05:55,047
You'd think she'd
have a little more--
137
00:05:55,043 --> 00:05:55,973
- [phone rings]
- [gasps]
138
00:05:55,977 --> 00:05:59,477
Funny Business, Inc.
Your fun is our business.
139
00:05:59,481 --> 00:06:00,471
Lincoln speaking.
140
00:06:00,482 --> 00:06:03,012
- WOMAN ON PHONE: [chatters]
- Yes, we're available the 11th.
141
00:06:03,017 --> 00:06:04,857
- WOMAN ON PHONE: [chatters]
- What?
142
00:06:04,853 --> 00:06:07,153
- WOMAN ON PHONE: [chatters]
- Oh, really?
143
00:06:07,155 --> 00:06:08,525
- WOMAN ON PHONE:
[chatters]
144
00:06:08,523 --> 00:06:10,223
- Great. See you the 11th.
145
00:06:10,225 --> 00:06:11,125
- Who did we just book?
146
00:06:11,126 --> 00:06:15,026
- Actually, the correct question
would be, who did I just book?
147
00:06:15,029 --> 00:06:17,169
- LISA: You're both wrong.
It's "whom."
148
00:06:17,165 --> 00:06:19,065
- [door slams]
- They only wanted me.
149
00:06:19,067 --> 00:06:21,037
- Yeah, right.
- It's true.
150
00:06:21,035 --> 00:06:22,165
You may not recognize
my talent,
151
00:06:22,170 --> 00:06:25,780
but apparently the birthday
party community does.
152
00:06:25,774 --> 00:06:27,074
- So, what are you gonna
do for your act?
153
00:06:27,075 --> 00:06:28,905
Fall on your butt
for an hour?
154
00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:31,050
- That's exactly what
I'm going to do,
155
00:06:31,045 --> 00:06:32,915
'cause the audiences
love it.
156
00:06:32,914 --> 00:06:33,914
Now, if you'll excuse me,
157
00:06:33,915 --> 00:06:37,085
I have to go put on
my padded underwear.
158
00:06:37,085 --> 00:06:38,955
- [glass shatters]
159
00:06:38,953 --> 00:06:40,913
- [chomps]
160
00:06:41,088 --> 00:06:43,958
- So, how old is
the birthday girl?
161
00:06:43,958 --> 00:06:45,228
Four? Five?
162
00:06:45,226 --> 00:06:46,526
- Thirteen.
163
00:06:46,528 --> 00:06:54,668
- ♪
164
00:06:54,669 --> 00:06:55,509
- Oh.
165
00:06:55,503 --> 00:06:58,903
A little older than my usual
crowd, but no problem.
166
00:06:58,907 --> 00:07:01,177
My comedy is ageless.
167
00:07:02,943 --> 00:07:05,773
Hey, guys!
Who's ready to laugh?
168
00:07:05,780 --> 00:07:09,820
Whoopsy-doodle!
Now who put this here?
169
00:07:09,818 --> 00:07:12,988
- Um, you did, obviously.
170
00:07:12,987 --> 00:07:17,657
- Maybe these glasses
will help me see better.
171
00:07:17,659 --> 00:07:19,599
- [eyeballs boing]
172
00:07:19,594 --> 00:07:22,224
- Eye-a-watha!
- [loud crash]
173
00:07:22,230 --> 00:07:23,700
- [eyeballs boing]
174
00:07:23,698 --> 00:07:26,638
- I really gotta get my
prescription checked.
175
00:07:26,634 --> 00:07:31,234
- Mom, look what that loser
clown did to my poster.
176
00:07:32,172 --> 00:07:34,972
- TWEENS:
[texting]
177
00:07:35,843 --> 00:07:38,913
- Oh, look at that!
I have a message, too.
178
00:07:38,913 --> 00:07:44,713
Mom, didn't I tell you not
to text me at--whoa!
179
00:07:44,719 --> 00:07:46,019
- [cake splats]
180
00:07:46,020 --> 00:07:48,830
- Remember, guys,
never walk and text.
181
00:07:48,823 --> 00:07:51,853
- Ugh, now he's gonna
lecture us?
182
00:07:51,860 --> 00:07:53,760
- He ruined my cake.
183
00:07:53,761 --> 00:07:56,061
Mom, why did
you hire him?
184
00:07:56,064 --> 00:07:58,564
I swear, if I had
a door around me,
185
00:07:58,566 --> 00:08:01,096
I would slam it
so hard right now.
186
00:08:01,102 --> 00:08:02,262
- Um, excuse me, everyone.
187
00:08:02,270 --> 00:08:05,840
There will now be a brief
unscheduled intermission.
188
00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:07,880
Text amongst yourselves.
189
00:08:07,876 --> 00:08:08,906
- Where are you going?
190
00:08:08,910 --> 00:08:10,210
I paid you to perform
for an hour.
191
00:08:10,211 --> 00:08:13,241
- But I'm doing my best
material and they hate me.
192
00:08:13,248 --> 00:08:14,748
- Well, try something else.
193
00:08:14,749 --> 00:08:16,619
You're a professional
clown, aren't you?
194
00:08:16,618 --> 00:08:18,618
- Remind me not to book
Funny Business, Inc.
195
00:08:18,620 --> 00:08:20,590
for my kid's birthday.
- Me, neither.
196
00:08:20,588 --> 00:08:23,758
- Oh, me neither.
I don't want my kid to hate me.
197
00:08:23,758 --> 00:08:24,358
- Heh-heh-heh.
198
00:08:24,359 --> 00:08:26,859
Sorry, gotta run to
the little clown's room.
199
00:08:28,028 --> 00:08:29,028
- [dialing phone]
- [phone rings]
200
00:08:29,030 --> 00:08:33,270
- Funny Business, Inc.
Your fun is our business.
201
00:08:33,268 --> 00:08:34,298
- Luan!
- Ugh!
202
00:08:34,302 --> 00:08:38,632
[static noises]
I'm sorry, I can't hear you.
203
00:08:38,640 --> 00:08:39,280
[static noises]
204
00:08:39,274 --> 00:08:41,234
My clown car's going
through a tunnel.
205
00:08:41,242 --> 00:08:43,972
- [phone rings]
- Luan, it's me.
206
00:08:43,978 --> 00:08:46,618
- I know.
That's why I hung up.
207
00:08:46,614 --> 00:08:47,814
- [phone rings]
208
00:08:47,815 --> 00:08:50,045
- This is a business
line, Lincoln.
209
00:08:50,051 --> 00:08:51,041
What do you want?
210
00:08:51,052 --> 00:08:52,782
- Luan, I'm bombing
out here.
211
00:08:52,787 --> 00:08:54,717
You gotta help me.
Please!
212
00:08:54,722 --> 00:08:58,292
- Oh, how could
I possibly help you?
213
00:08:58,293 --> 00:09:00,323
You're the clowning expert.
214
00:09:00,328 --> 00:09:02,168
- No, I'm not. You are.
215
00:09:02,163 --> 00:09:03,993
You told me there's
a lot more to clowning
216
00:09:03,998 --> 00:09:06,868
than just falling on your butt,
and you were right.
217
00:09:06,868 --> 00:09:08,808
Will you please come help me?
218
00:09:08,803 --> 00:09:09,633
- I don't know, Lincoln.
219
00:09:09,637 --> 00:09:12,807
Maybe bombing would be a good
learning experience for you.
220
00:09:12,807 --> 00:09:14,807
- Well, there's
one other thing.
221
00:09:14,809 --> 00:09:16,909
I think I'm ruining
the reputation
222
00:09:16,911 --> 00:09:18,071
of Funny Business, Inc.
223
00:09:18,079 --> 00:09:19,349
These parents are brutal.
224
00:09:19,347 --> 00:09:22,347
- Don't move.
I'll be right there.
225
00:09:22,950 --> 00:09:23,690
- [hat squishes]
226
00:09:23,685 --> 00:09:26,755
- [foghorn bellows]
- Aah! Gary!
227
00:09:26,754 --> 00:09:28,284
- [teeth chattering]
228
00:09:28,289 --> 00:09:31,659
Luan! Wait, how did
you know I was in here?
229
00:09:31,659 --> 00:09:34,029
- Well, this was
a pretty good clue.
230
00:09:34,028 --> 00:09:36,098
- Oh.
So, what's the plan?
231
00:09:36,097 --> 00:09:38,127
- Okay. Let's see
what we got here.
232
00:09:38,132 --> 00:09:41,932
Hm, emo tweens.
Notoriously tough crowd.
233
00:09:41,936 --> 00:09:44,806
But don't worry.
This isn't my first mopefest.
234
00:09:44,806 --> 00:09:48,106
- [accordion music]
- [cane tapping]
235
00:09:48,109 --> 00:09:56,949
- ♪
236
00:09:56,951 --> 00:09:58,381
- Oh, I get it.
237
00:09:58,386 --> 00:10:00,716
She's, like,
trapped in a box.
238
00:10:00,722 --> 00:10:02,352
That's exactly how
I felt when my mom said
239
00:10:02,357 --> 00:10:05,857
I couldn't dye
my hair purple.
240
00:10:05,860 --> 00:10:10,230
- ♪
241
00:10:10,231 --> 00:10:10,821
- Wow.
242
00:10:10,832 --> 00:10:16,402
It's, like, the soul-crushing
pointlessness of seventh grade.
243
00:10:16,404 --> 00:10:18,004
- You ready to do this?
244
00:10:18,006 --> 00:10:18,776
- I don't know.
245
00:10:18,773 --> 00:10:21,743
- You'll be fine.
Just follow my lead.
246
00:10:21,743 --> 00:10:31,013
- ♪
247
00:10:31,019 --> 00:10:35,859
- Wow. It's about how we're
all just, like, clones.
248
00:10:35,857 --> 00:10:38,287
- That's what
I was gonna say.
249
00:10:38,292 --> 00:10:40,322
- Exactly.
250
00:10:40,328 --> 00:10:42,228
- [slow applause]
251
00:10:42,230 --> 00:10:44,770
- I have to get
their business card.
252
00:10:44,766 --> 00:10:45,996
- [excited chatter]
253
00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:48,510
- Well, I call the weekend
of the 22nd.
254
00:10:48,503 --> 00:10:52,273
- [cheering and applause]
255
00:10:52,273 --> 00:10:54,133
- Thanks for saving my butt.
256
00:10:54,142 --> 00:10:55,772
You were amazing
out there.
257
00:10:55,777 --> 00:10:58,177
And I'm sorry for
the way I was acting.
258
00:10:58,179 --> 00:10:58,849
- It's okay.
259
00:10:58,846 --> 00:11:01,346
I remember how great it was
to get my first big laugh.
260
00:11:01,349 --> 00:11:03,319
I shouldn't have
been so harsh.
261
00:11:03,317 --> 00:11:04,447
Still my assistant?
262
00:11:04,452 --> 00:11:05,952
- Still your assistant.
263
00:11:05,953 --> 00:11:07,953
Let me get those for ya.
264
00:11:07,955 --> 00:11:09,485
Whoa!
- [farting noises]
265
00:11:09,490 --> 00:11:10,760
- [laughs]
266
00:11:10,758 --> 00:11:13,228
You know, that actually
was kinda funny.
267
00:11:13,227 --> 00:11:16,027
Here, let me help--whoa!
Good gravy!
268
00:11:16,030 --> 00:11:19,200
- [farting noise]
- BOTH: [laughing]
269
00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:22,010
- Eye-a-watha!
- [farting noise]
270
00:11:24,871 --> 00:11:33,011
- ♪