- ♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪
♪ Dodging girls like Ping-Pong balls ♪
♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪
♪ Leaping over laundry piles
♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪
♪ Guy's got to do what he can to survive ♪
- ♪ In the Loud house
♪ In the Loud house
- ♪ Duck, dodge, push, and shove ♪
♪ Is how we show our love
- ♪ In the Loud house, in the Loud house ♪
- ♪ One boy and ten girls
♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world ♪
- ♪ Loud Loud Loud
♪ Loud house
- Poo-poo.
[energetic music]
♪
[video game sounds]
- Oh gotta watch out for that.
Ah! Lincoln, look out!
Road cow!
- Turbo-tastic, player one!
You crushed the time for this track.
Way to stay safe, player two.
You obeyed all the rules of the road.
- Yes! That's what I'm talking about.
- Nice going, Clyde. - You too, bud.
Ah!
- Lana, how long have you been in there?
- Long enough to see what a good driver you are
and to find this old doughnut.
[frog ribbits]
Lincoln, how'd you like to put those driving skills
to the test in real life
and help your favorite sister impress her hero?
- "Sign up now for the Royal Woods Go-Kart Grand Prix."
First prize is a ride with superstar racer...
both: Bobbie Fletcher.
- [sighs] I've been dreaming about it
all week.
[car horn honks] Huh?
- Hey, Lana. Ready for our ride?
- Hop in!
- I don't care if I'm dreaming. Nobody pinch me.
♪
- Buckle up.
- Let's fly!
- That's why I'm scouting you as my co-driver.
I need the best.
- Well, I am a pro at driving super-fast virtual cars.
What kind of ride are we working with?
- Presenting Loud Lightning!
- Lana, that's a bathtub,
and are those Lily's old stroller wheels?
- Don't focus on what it is, Linc.
Focus on what it will be!
- Okay.
Eh, I'm still just seeing a bathtub.
Hey, why don't we soup up
Lola's old princess jeep instead?
That's something humans are actually meant to drive.
- Pshaw, that would totally violate
the spirit of the race.
A true racer builds her own car from scratch.
That's what Bobbie Fletcher does,
and that's what I'm going to do, too.
- But this thing doesn't even have an engine.
- Not yet,
but thanks to my connections
down at the scrapyard,
that is gonna change.
We'll make this tub purr in no time.
[upbeat music]
[straining]
♪
- Wow, this thing is starting to look like an actual car.
- It's gonna drive like one, too.
Let's take it for a spin. Buckle up.
- The feather boa seat belts were a nice touch.
- Thanks. Now let's get out of here
before Lola realizes they're gone.
- I'm telling you, Clyde,
the competition doesn't stand a chance.
against Loud Lightning.
- I feel sorry for them.
[engine roars loudly] Whoa!
[dramatic music]
I retract that.
- How the heck did those kids build them?
We gotta get to the bottom of this.
Hey, Chandler. Nice ride.
What kind of engine did you install
on this bad boy?
V8? V12? V64?
- [sighs] I don't know.
We just bought it.
Uh, did you weirdos just come out of that bush?
- Never mind that. What about building your car
from scratch, like Bobbie Fletcher?
- [laughs] Who's got time for that?
- But don't you care about the spirit of the race?
- Uh, news flash. We just care about winning.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I think you have some dust to eat.
- [coughing]
Lana, you need to see this. - Hang on!
Tweaking an axle. There.
I'm one step closer to that ride with Bobbie Fletcher.
Oh, I made something for you.
- [grunts] - Loud Lightning helmets.
I even made one for Bobbie!
She and I can wear them everywhere:
the movies, the racetrack, the Burpin' Burger.
- Look, Lana, I've seen the competition.
They're all driving
crazy fancy cars from this catalog.
Maybe we should too, just to be safe.
- Pssh, we can't worry about what others are doing.
Loud Lightning has got this.
- Does it, though?
Just leaf through the catalog.
I circled some models you might like.
If we get a loan from Lola--
hey, you didn't even open it.
- Don't need to. I have faith in our car.
I know Loud Lightning can win this thing.
Charles, you little scamp.
get back here with our steering wheel.
- Ugh.
[both quaver]
- Ah, we'll never beat their time.
- Well, that's the last time I let you borrow my stopwatch.
- Oh, sorry, Clyde.
It's not fair at all.
Lana worked harder on her car than anyone else,
and now she's gonna be humiliated
in front of her hero.
[laughter and jeering]
[somber music]
- But--but I'm the only one who built my own car.
- But you lost,
and Bobbie Fletcher only rides with winners.
♪
- Sorry, kid.
♪
- [whimpers]
- No, Lana is not going down like that.
If everyone else is gonna cut corners,
so can we. But I'll need help--
a lot of help.
- Eh, I don't know.
- Mm, it's not so much cheating
as it is giving Lana
a fair chance over the cheaters.
- Hmm. I'll rally the troops.
- Welcome to the Royal Woods Go-Kart Grand Prix.
Racers, to the starting line.
- Team Loud, Team Loud!
- Hey, those are my feather boas!
- You're seriously drivingthat?
It looks like you made it yourself.
- Uh, yeah, we did.
- [laughs]
- You just wait till the race starts, punk!
You're gonna eat their dust!
An-nan-nan-nan-nan! - [whimpers]
- We got this, Lans.
- Glad you finally believe in Loud Lightning.
- What can I say?
I've just got a feeling things are gonna go our way.
[stealthy music]
[quietly] Everyone in position?
- Affirmative! - Yeehaw!
- Let's do this.
- Let's all give a warm welcome
to our guest of honor,
Bobbie Fletcher!
- [gasps] There she is.
Right. Okay, Lans, focus.
- Fire up those engines, folks.
First one around the Royal Woods raceway
will be the winner!
On your mark, get set, go!
[energetic music]
♪
- Go for Operation Cone Zone.
♪
- Detour? Has that always been here?
- Yep. It's right here
on the race map.
Eyes on the road, Lans.
♪
Ooh-whoo! Nothing can stop us now!
♪
- And we're stopping.
- Come on, Loud Lightning. You got this.
- Go for Operation Magna-Boost.
♪
- Yeah!
I knew my baby could do it.
- Shh.
- [gasps]
[quietly] Yeah!
[muffled grunting]
Whoa!
[wearily] I'm okay...
♪
- Eh, go for Operation Pig Parade.
- Showtime, y'all.Soo-ee!
[pigs squealing]
- We're so close to the other cars,
I can smell them.
[sniffs] Wait, that's not exhaust.
That smells like...
[gasps] Mud!
Sweet, sweet mud!
- Not now, Lana. This is our chance.
Gun it for that ramp!
- Right, right.
♪
both: Whoo-hoo! - Yeah!
♪
The finish line is just ahead.
We can't let them pass us now.
- Relax. They won't.
I've been saving my secret weapon
for the home stretch.
We're going turbo!
I said turbo!
Go turbo!
- Go for Operation Wingman.
♪
[drones buzzing]
- Turbo boost!
We can win this! What's that buzzing sound?
- Uh, nothing. Watch the road.
- Drones?
What the heck's going on here?
- I'm just as baffled as you.
Where could those have come from?
[laughs weakly]
[brakes squeal]
- Cut the bologna. You're making us cheat!
[gasps]
And you've been doing this the whole time!
All the weird stuff that happened during the race--
it's been you!
- Lana, you don't-- - Zip it, Lincoln!
You're fired as my co-driver.
- Whoa! [grunts]
- Come on, Hops.
Let's go do this the right way.
- Lana, wait, please! I'm sorry!
I was just trying to level the playing field.
The race was never going to be fair
with all those store-bought cars.
- How many times do I have to tell you?
I don't care about those other cars.
- But I thought you wanted to win.
- Yeah, but not like that.
I wanted to win like a true racer, like Bobbie,
and that's why I'm starting over.
- That's really honorable.
I should've let you do the race your way
in the first place.
- I get it.
You were trying to be a good big brother.
- So, uh, you still need a co-driver?
- Hop in!
[upbeat music]
All right, let's do this!
- Whoa!
- Hops.
- [croaks]
- We finally made it.
Too bad no one's awake
to see us cross the finish line.
- I am! [both gasp]
- Congratulations.
I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You're the only team who built their own car.
In fact, I'd love to take it for a spin.
- O-of course, Bobbie!
But wait. I made you something.
- Wow! I love it.
I could wear this everywhere:
the movies, the racetrack, the Burpin' Burger.
Whoo! Let's ride.
- Get ready to burn some rubber!
- Oof!
- [laughs]Oops.
- Don't sweat it, Lana.
My first car broke down all the time, too.
Want some help with repairs?
- Oh, that'd be great!
- I love a happy ending!
[upbeat rock music]
♪
[cowbell ringing]
- [sniffs] What's that smell?
- Oh, I just put on a fresh coat.
- I have a few things decomposing.
- Ah, just airing out the dogs.
- Um, okay. Well, it's not Leni's nails,
or rotting flesh... [gags]
It's definitely not feet. This smell is...
[sniffs] Divine.
Huh? [moaning]
Luana Banana, it's you?
- Oh, hey, Dad.
- Is that a Monte Cristo sandwich
on brioche?
- Oh, I messed it up.
It's supposed to be on bread.
- No! [grunts]
Oh, no. Brioche is bread.
It's French. Hey, what's the occasion?
Wait, this isn't a trick sandwich, is it?
- [sighs] No.
We picked electives in school,
and I got locked out of my top two choices:
Advanced Punning
and To Hee-Hee or Not to Hee-Hee:
The Philosophical Joke and You,
and now I'm stuck taking Intro to Cooking,
and I can't imagine a more boring class.
- And I can't imagine a more delicious sandwich.
Luan, you have some real talent.
- Really? I don't know much about food.
Comedy is more my bread and butter.
[laughs]Get it?
- [laughs] Good one, honey.
Actually, cooking is a lot like comedy,
a balance of creativity and performance.
Just give me a chance to show you
how much fun cooking can be.
It's always been my dream to share my passion
with one of you kids.
- What do you have to lose?
- I'm in!
- Whoo-hoo!
- Egh! Say it, don't spray it, pal!
- Here we go. Matching chef hats.
You gotta look good to cook good.
- Hey, what about me?
- Okay. Uh...
There you go. Now, let's see that syllabus.
Ah, yes. First assignment: eggs,
the versatile rock star of the food world.
You can boil them, poach them, fry them, shirr them,
quiche them, Scotch them, Benedict them.
- [groans]
- And always remember, it's okay to...
yolk around in the kitchen.
[scatting] No--don't!
[groans]
- [laughs]
- There it is.
I knew I'd get you to crack a smile.
[laughs] Go ahead, give it a fry.
[upbeat music]
♪
- So how'd I do?
- [gasps]
I've always wondered how I'd look in egg.
[sniffs] It's just...
It's just more beautiful than I ever imagined.
[both gasp] Bad Charles!
Stop eating my face!
[light music]
Wow, honey. Impressive knife work.
Swift but safe.
Hold on there. A good chef
always inspects her crudité platter.
♪
- Ah!
- It's a finger food.Get it?
[both laugh] - Well, aren't you a fungi?
- Mmm. Ugh.
That one had some dirt on it.
- Finished the lava cake.
- Well, it's got the four Cs of a great cake:
chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, and creativity.
[rumbling sound] Um...
Honey, how much baking powder did you use?
- Oh, I'm not sure.
You made a pun, and I got distracted.
- [whistles] Ah!
- Oh, no Sorry, Dad.
- Mmm, mmm. No, Luan, I lava it!
Happy accidents in the kitchen are part of the fun.
♪
- Final exam.
Cooking dinner for ten or more people.
- Oh, an entire dinner.
That seems intense.
- Intense, but fun.
The best part of being a chef
is bringing others joy with your food,
and I've got the perfect dish.
- Pasta, clams, butter...
[gasps] Geo?
Dad, we can't cook our hamster!
- What?No, no.
Scram, Geo.
It's my famous Lynn-guine,
the first dish I ever served anyone.
And now it's your turn.
- You really think I can pull it off?
- Of course! And besides,
who better to test your chops on
than your own loving, supportive family?
[all clamoring]
- I'm getting hangry!
- Quiet down in there.
[sighs] You got this, kiddo.
- Oh... - Mmm!
- Okay, what you have in front of you
is Dad's famous Lynn-guine and clams.
It's prepared al dente in a beurre blanc sauce
and finished with just a hint of parsley.
Bon appétit.
[suspenseful music]
- [yowls]
♪
[all talking agreeably] - That was delicious.
both: [gasps] Whoo-hoo!
- Hooray! - Whoo, whoo!
Oh, you crushed it!
[upbeat music]
- Oh, man. You were right, Dad!
Seeing those empty plates and happy faces
is making me feel so warm.
- Oh, honey, that me--
oh, that might be because the oven's still on.
- No, no, I mean it!
That felt almost as good
as getting a big laugh on stage!
I'm kind of bummed my elective is over.
I've had so much fun cooking with you, Dad.
- Oh! Well, I'm glad to hear that,
'cause the fun doesn't have to end.
- [laughs] Lynn and Luan's Table?
- Yeah! That's right, honey.
I want you to carry on the Loud legacy
and take over the restaurant someday.
- What, me? No.
Who, me? Really?
- Oh, I can see it now!
You and me taking the restaurant world by storm,
cracking jokes and yolks,
making puns and buns.
- Well, I have been having a lot of fun.
- And there's so much more to be had.
- Hmm, let's do it!
- Oh, it's happening! This might be
the happiest moment of my life!
- [laughs]
- Oh, get in here, you big dummy!
♪
- [snores] [gong rings]
Ah! Luna! I thought we made
a roommate pact. I don't dip your hand
in warm water while you're sleeping
and you don't play your gong after 10:00 p.m.
- Wasn't me, dude. [gong rings]
♪
- Dad? What are you doing?
- Maybe he's sleep-gonging.
- A good chef rises early
to source the freshest ingredients.
- But it's-- - Fun, right?
All good practice for when you take over the restaurant.
Wait till you meet our fish lady.
You're gonna love her!
- Oh...
- It's all about the flaws.
- [gasps] [sniffs]
Oh, yeah. That's the good stuff, Deb.
Grab a sniff of the ocean, Luan.
- [snoring] Oof!
[frantic music]
- Uh... - Fluffier.
- Uh... - Fluffier!
- Ah! - Fluffier!
- [yells]
All right, Dad. We need to talk.
- [humming] Oh, we sure do.
Honey, this sauce is amazing!
I think we've found ourselves a new menu item.
- But-- - Hang on.
I gotta call my sauce guy.
Hey, Mikey Marinara!
You're never gonna believe what my daughter made!
- [wearily] Oh.
[school bell rings]
- I've really been getting into--
- Hey, honey! - [gasps] Dad!
[laughs weakly] What are you doing here?
- I brought lunch!
- But I already have lunch.
- Oh, you can't be eating basic PB&Js.
If you're gonna take over the restaurant,
you need to work on refining your palate.
Okay, I got Limburger cheese.
[all groaning]
- A main course of boeuf bourguignon...
- Ah! - Oh!
- And don't worry. I brought dessert.
It's an oldie but a goodie. It's baked Alaska.
Well, almost. [chuckles]
[yelps]
[fire alarm beeping]
[light jazz riff]
- [sighs]
Oh, Mr. Coconuts.
Keep this between us,
but I don't want to cook anymore.
Dad's kind of taken all the fun out of it,
and I don't know how to tell him that.
He's just so happy, you know?
Mr. Coconuts?
[dramatic music]
[gasps]
Lincoln, have you seen this funny man?
Two feet tall, orange hair, has a real ear for punchlines.
- I know Mr. Coconuts, Luan,
but sorry, don't know where he is.
- Oh.
So you haven't seen him,
and you also have a poo-poo.
- Mm-hmm.
- Ugh.
Luna! Have you seen Mr. Coconuts?
- Actually, no, and if I'm being honest,
it's been kind of nice.
- [whistling] - Lock down the house!
Call the cops! File a missing persons report.
Mr. Coconuts is officially MIA!
- Oh, honey, relax.
Mr. Coconuts is fine.
Yeah, I put him into storage.
- Huh? Wait, why would you do that?
- Luan, when I decided to dedicate my life to food,
I didn't touch a cowbell for months!
Comedy can wait. You need to focus on cooking
if you're gonna take over the restaurant.
- Dad... - Of course, first,
you're gonna have to attend
the Culinary Institute of Michigan,
but someone with your talent should breeze right through.
- [teeth gritted] Dad... - After that,
it's on to an apprenticeship.
Maybe you can go somewhere fun, like Paris.
Oh! Or Kansas City.
I heard they're doing great stuff with ribs down there.
- [growling]
- But after that, you can take over--
- I'm not taking over the restaurant!
- Oh, don't give me that look.
I was just helping to nurture Luan's talent.
[sighs] Oh, you're right.
What have I done? I need to fix this.
[knock at door]
- Come in, I guess.
- I made apology apple turnovers.
- Hmm. They're underbaked.
- Ouch. I deserved that.
But I had a long talk with my new sous chef
and realized something.
I kind of took the fun out of cooking
by laying on the pressure a little too thick.
- You think?
- It wasn't fair of me to force my dreams onto you, sweetie.
It's just, none of you guys have ever taken an interest
in my passion. I got carried away.
Let's just forget about the restaurant for now.
- You were excited, Dad. I get it.
Apology apple turnovers accepted.
Now how about you and me
tag-team a family dinnertonight?
- I promise to be a fungi and not a pressure cooker.
[laughs] - I'm game.
Wait, who's this wise new sous chef
giving you all this great advice?
- Meet the newest member of the Loud cooking family.
- [gasps] Oh!
- He came highly recommended.
- And I can really dice and slice.
- Shall we get back to having fun?
I think we make a great...pear.
- You butter believe it.
[both laugh]
- ♪ Cramped inside this tiny space ♪
♪ May sound bad but ain't the case ♪
♪ In the Loud house - ♪ Loud house
- ♪ Duck and dodge and push and shove ♪
♪ That's the way we show our love in the Loud house ♪
- ♪ Loud house
♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪
♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪
♪ Stand in line to take a pee
♪ Never any privacy
♪ Chaos with 11 kids
♪ That's the way it always is ♪
♪ In the Loud house