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{\an2}This programme contains strong
language and adult humour.
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00:00:04,440 --> 00:00:06,560
{\an2}Well, well, well. Ooh.
Oh, no, no.
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00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:09,080
{\an2}Yes. Ah. Hiss.
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{\an2}Ahhh! Um...
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{\an2}Quite windy today. Yeah.
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{\an2}Christ. Whoo. Wrong way.
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{\an2}That's how you do it, baby. OK.
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{\an2}Oh, my God.
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{\an2}Ah. Ah.
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{\an2}Ooh.
SHE VOCALISES
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{\an2}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
Hello, thank you.
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{\an2}I'm Greg Davies,
welcome to Taskmaster.
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{\an2}The only show on television that
conclusively proves that all
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{\an2}of life's struggles are
ultimately pointless
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{\an2}and that the gods are just toying
with us before death.
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{\an2}And hello to all our
younger viewers.
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{\an2}Let the trials commence.
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{\an2}Let's meet our five competitors
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{\an2}from wildly different parts of
the globe.
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{\an2}Like the north of England,
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{\an2}Dublin, the north of England,
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{\an2}the west of England
and the north of England.
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{\an2}Please welcome Joanne McNally...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}..John Robins...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}..Nick Mohammed...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}..Sophie Willan...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}..and Steve Pemberton.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}And sitting next to me,
a man who admitted
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{\an2}to me that he photocopied
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{\an2}an elderly relative's blue
parking badge
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{\an2}so that he could enjoy
the "Hollywood spaces"
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{\an2}near the entrance to Tesco...
LAUGHTER
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{\an2}..it's little Alex Horne!
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}Hi, Greg.
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{\an2}Hi, mate. You all right?
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{\an2}I'm, I'm, I'm feeling good,
I'm looking great.
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{\an2}I think I've cracked it. I've got a
new health regime. It's so simple.
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{\an2}Honestly, I don't go to the gym.
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{\an2}It's just dog walking.
45 minutes a day - dog walking.
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{\an2}So the opening section of
the show is you...
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{\an2}You've walked your dog a bit and you
feel like you've lost some weight?
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{\an2}No, not quite. No, no,
45 minutes dog walking.
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{\an2}Do you want me to show you?
Ah, yeah. It's like that.
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{\an2}45 minutes a day, at least.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}OK, on with the prize task, then.
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{\an2}Jolly good. Yes,
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{\an2}you've got it, poppet,
and this week they've brought in...
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{\an1}LAUGHING
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{\an2}You know I don't like that.
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{\an2}I don't...I don't like "you've got
it, poppet". No... No, I know.
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{\an2}You got it, poppet.
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{\an2}And this week, they've brought in
the most fun thing
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{\an2}to turn upside down.
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{\an2}So there will be five points for
the most fun thing
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{\an2}to turn upside down, and all five
fun things will go home
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{\an2}with the episode winner, who can
keep them
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{\an2}whichever way up they bloody
well want.
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{\an2}Welcome, contestants.
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{\an2}Steve. Start with you today.
How are you?
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{\an2}I'm very well, thank you, poppet.
How are you?
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{\an1}LAUGHING
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{\an2}What have you brought me that
you can turn upside down
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{\an2}that I'll have fun with?
A calculator. Ahhh.
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{\an2}Yes, he has.
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{\an2}I know where you're going
with this... Yeah.
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{\an2}..and I approve this message.
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{\an2}Do you know the number?
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{\an2}Uh, is it 8-0-0-8?
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{\an2}It's 5-3-1-8-0-0-8.
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{\an2}And here it is. Yeah. Yeah.
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{\an2}You turn that upside down.
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{\an2}You're saying that I don't,
like I don't know this.
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{\an2}Boobies.
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{\an2}Well, I thought you might find
boobies a little bit limited...
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{\an2}Wrong. So...
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{\an2}As well as your boobies...
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{\an2}What else have you got for me?
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{\an2}..I thought it might be nice
to compose a calculator haiku.
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{\an2}Oh, wow. Um...
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{\an2}So a haiku, obviously, is
a Japanese poem with,
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{\an2}uh, five syllables,
seven syllables and five syllables.
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{\an2}We go to a haiku club every Sunday.
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{\an2}So this is a calculator haiku.
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{\an2}Big boss gobbles eggs.
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{\an2}His hole oozes shizzle.
LAUGHTER
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{\an2}Gosh, beige blobs soil his shoes.
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{\an2}Steve, I'm genuinely impressed.
Well done. Thank you.
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{\an2}Who's next? Sophie?
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{\an2}What have you brought in that's nice
turned upside down?
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{\an2}Steak pudding.
LAUGHTER
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{\an2}It's one of a,
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{\an2}a northern delicacy. It's very
beautiful, poppet. I...
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00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:03,880
{\an2}You just...
LAUGHTER
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{\an2}You steam it.
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{\an2}It's got gravy in the centre
with steak chunks.
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{\an2}Sorry. Can you ask Sophie if she
thinks I don't know what a pie is?
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{\an2}I think you may have missed
the point of this.
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{\an2}You can't just tell me
a thing you like eating.
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{\an2}Well, it's the most fun thing
to turn upside down.
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{\an2}They're very satisfying to pull...
Yeah. The...the tinfoil off. Yeah.
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{\an2}Thank you, Steve. I concur,
I concur.
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{\an2}And if you had two of them at
the same time...
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{\an2}Boobies.
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{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}John.
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{\an2}Greg. What have you brought us?
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{\an2}I have brought in,
uh, the Chicago Bulls logo.
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{\an2}I'm familiar with it,
a lovely big bull. Yes.
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{\an2}Why is it gonna be fun when
I turn it upside down?
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{\an2}I don't like to curse too much
on telly, Greg,
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{\an2}cos my mum'll be watching this,
but there's,
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{\an2}there's no other way
to describe this to you,
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{\an2}what happens when you turn it
upside down. OK.
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{\an2}It looks like a robot
fucking a crab.
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{\an1}LAUGHING
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{\an2}Yet another of my fantasies.
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{\an2}Here we go. OK.
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{\an2}LAUGHING
Oh, yeah.
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{\an2}I don't... What's the positioning?
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{\an2}It is a sad robot making sweet love
to a crab.
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{\an2}From behind, got it.
That's what I mean.
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{\an2}The robot isn't happy about this.
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{\an2}The...the robot is angry.
But also it's,
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{\an2}it's a challenge to initiate it,
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{\an2}because they're obviously moving
left to right.
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{\an2}Maybe the robot's angry cos he's
got a nasty case of humans.
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{\an2}Oh.
LAUGHING AND APPLAUSE
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{\an2}Nick.
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{\an2}Well, if you bring up
the picture, then I'll be able
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{\an2}to explain. So a friend of my mum's
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{\an2}at the church that she goes
to went on holiday and, um,
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{\an2}brought them all back these
lovely vases.
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{\an1}LAUGHING
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{\an2}And my mum popped some flowers in,
watered the flowers,
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{\an2}and then the following week said
to him, was like, "Oh, I'm so sorry
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{\an2}"it's just, it is just leaking".
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{\an2}And he was like, "It is a drum."
LAUGHING
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{\an2}This is a debate,
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{\an2}but I put it to you that there's
not a person in this room
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{\an2}who didn't think, "Why's someone put
flowers in that drum?" Yeah.
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{\an2}That's the opposite
of what she thought.
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{\an2}Joanne? Yes. So you know the way
bats, they hang normally upside down
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{\an2}but if you flip a bat around
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{\an2}so it's facing up when it's
upside down.
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{\an2}Let's start again.
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{\an2}Bats sleep upside down. Bats sleep
upside down traditionally.
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{\an2}And what you're saying is if you
flip a bat while... Flip it up.
..while it's sleeping.
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{\an2}So it looks like it's standing up
but it's actually upside down.
Yeah.
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{\an2}It looks like kind of a Goth disco.
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{\an2}First of all this is what she's
brought in, which is a bat. Yeah.
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{\an2}But what this bat represents is
a Goth disco... Yeah.
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{\an2}..demonstrated here by some bats.
ROCK MUSIC PLAYS
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{\an1}LAUGHTER
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{\an2}That's good. That is good.
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{\an2}Big spooky capes and... They're very
Florence and the Machine.
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00:07:06,440 --> 00:07:08,400
{\an2}Oh, God. I'm gonna actually have
to think about
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{\an2}the points
and just pop pudding at the bottom.
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{\an1}LAUGHING
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{\an2}I think I'm gonna give
the crab three points.
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{\an2}And then I'm gonna give
the drum four points,
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{\an2}because I just think it's adorable.
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{\an2}And, uh, the bats are just haunting
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{\an2}and Steve's genius should be
rewarded for all that work
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{\an2}so I'll give bats
and Steve five points. Oh, right.
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{\an2}OK, Joanne
and Steve get five points.
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{\an2}OK, let's get going.
What have you got for me, Alex?
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00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:42,000
{\an2}A former Romanian football
player, Greg, because the five
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{\an2}competitors are about
to try their hand at Petrescu.
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00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:48,480
{\an2}Pet rescue -
they're gonna rescue a pet.
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00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:49,800
{\an2}Here we go.
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{\an2}SHE LAUGHS
Joanne.
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{\an2}Looks like a fantasy of mine.
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{\an2}Is it? Yeah. Well, we do our best.
We did a lot of research.
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{\an2}I'm aroused.
LAUGHING
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{\an2}They're all Greg's.
He's quite tender.
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{\an2}That makes sense, yeah. Yeah.
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00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:23,920
{\an2}Are they all in his bed at night?
Yes. Cool.
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00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:26,680
{\an2}Good morning, Alex. Hello, John.
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00:08:26,720 --> 00:08:29,200
{\an2}This is the task? No envelope.
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00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:31,880
{\an2}Missing. Rescue the cat.
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00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:34,440
{\an2}Goes by the name Patatas.
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00:08:34,480 --> 00:08:35,560
{\an2}Goes by...
HE LAUGHS
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00:08:35,600 --> 00:08:39,000
{\an2}Goes by the name of Patatas.
As in patatas bravas?
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00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:41,360
{\an2}The cat must come out of
the top hole.
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00:08:42,880 --> 00:08:45,000
{\an2}There's a hole in the top of
the dome.
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00:08:45,040 --> 00:08:48,800
{\an2}Is there...is there a claw? Do I
have to man a claw? It's up to you.
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00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:52,280
{\an2}Your head may not enter the dome.
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00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:55,320
{\an2}The door must remain closed.
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00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,800
{\an2}This door, but I've gotta keep my
head out?
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00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:02,320
{\an2}I don't know where
the cat is amongst this lot. Right.
191
00:09:03,720 --> 00:09:06,120
{\an2}Fastest wins.
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00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:08,280
{\an2}Your time starts now, I suppose,
eh?
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00:09:08,320 --> 00:09:10,480
{\an2}Right. OK. I don't have a
clue, actually.
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00:09:10,520 --> 00:09:12,600
{\an2}OK, I'm ready.
APPLAUSE
195
00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:17,520
{\an2}I've always wanted
to be in one of those machines.
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00:09:17,560 --> 00:09:19,120
{\an2}Have a swim. Yeah.
197
00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:20,720
{\an2}And then pulled out by a claw.
198
00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,040
{\an2}Has anyone ever won any on one
of those things?
199
00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:25,080
{\an2}Never. I, yeah, quite often.
200
00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:27,400
{\an2}LAUGHTER
It's just technique and practice.
201
00:09:27,440 --> 00:09:29,840
{\an2}Have you won on one of those
things? No.
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00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:30,920
{\an2}OK. Let's go.
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00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:33,400
{\an2}Let's see them try to get Patatas
out of a big dome.
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00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:37,080
{\an2}OK. First up we're gonna see
Joanne fulfil her fantasy
205
00:09:37,120 --> 00:09:40,320
{\an2}and Steve fulfil his contractual
obligations. Here we go.
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00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,920
{\an2}The door must remain closed.
207
00:09:45,120 --> 00:09:47,320
{\an2}Oh, my God, it is a claw!
208
00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:49,600
{\an2}Amazing.
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00:09:49,640 --> 00:09:52,200
{\an2}Oh, Patatas, Patatas.
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00:09:52,240 --> 00:09:55,960
{\an2}Have you definitely, definitely read
all the instructions? Uh, yes, uh,
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00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:59,480
{\an2}yeah. The door must remain closed.
I'm just seeing that the zip works.
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00:10:00,560 --> 00:10:03,400
{\an2}All right, OK. Let's do it... If you
think that... No, let's do it the
hard way.
213
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:08,560
{\an2}So I have to find the...
I see the cat there!
214
00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:10,600
{\an2}God, I wouldn't be rescuing that cat
if it was mine.
215
00:10:10,640 --> 00:10:13,280
{\an2}It looks like a bad
job of taxidermy.
216
00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:15,080
{\an1}LAUGHING
217
00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:18,600
{\an2}OK, so, I'm assuming this is
relevant in some way.
218
00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:20,440
{\an2}Ah, right. We've got a...an opening.
219
00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:24,920
{\an2}Um, now, I thought I saw Patatas.
220
00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:27,240
{\an2}But how do I encourage him
towards...
221
00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:29,240
{\an2}Oh, he's gotta go out the top hole.
222
00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:33,400
{\an2}I'm gonna try and fashion
a noose for the cat's neck.
223
00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:36,480
{\an2}You didn't say it had to come out
alive, it just had to come out.
224
00:10:38,080 --> 00:10:40,360
{\an2}Have you used a ladder before?
LAUGHING
225
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:42,440
{\an2}Hold on.
226
00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:44,680
{\an2}Ah. OK.
227
00:10:44,720 --> 00:10:46,800
{\an2}Hold the ladder. Pfft.
228
00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:49,560
{\an2}AUDIENCE: Ooooh!
229
00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:51,760
{\an2}That's a big hook. It's a big hook.
230
00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:54,080
{\an2}Big hook for a big job.
231
00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:56,880
{\an2}OK. Come on, Patatas.
232
00:10:56,920 --> 00:11:00,960
{\an2}Be bravas. Where is he?
233
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:02,640
{\an2}Come on.
234
00:11:02,680 --> 00:11:05,000
{\an2}If I grab the cat
and just throw it out the top.
235
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:09,720
{\an2}OK. If this goes back in now,
236
00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:11,960
{\an2}I'm just gonna throw myself in
front of a car.
237
00:11:14,880 --> 00:11:16,320
{\an2}Oh...
238
00:11:16,360 --> 00:11:17,840
{\an2}Oh...
239
00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:20,280
{\an2}Ah.
SHE LAUGHS DEFEATEDLY
240
00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:25,680
{\an2}I can't go through it all again,
I've no hooks left.
241
00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:29,360
{\an2}I wonder, could I blow him over?
242
00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:32,400
{\an1}LAUGHING
243
00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:34,800
{\an2}Remember your head can't go in.
It's not in at the moment.
244
00:11:34,840 --> 00:11:36,520
{\an2}Yes, head's not in.
245
00:11:36,560 --> 00:11:38,080
{\an2}Come on, Patatas.
246
00:11:38,120 --> 00:11:39,800
{\an2}Come on.
247
00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:42,280
{\an2}Oh, is that Patatas?
248
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:49,120
{\an2}OK.
HE GRUNTS
249
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,920
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
250
00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:57,640
{\an2}Well, I've stopped the clock, Steve.
251
00:11:57,680 --> 00:11:59,960
{\an2}See ya. Bye-bye.
252
00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:01,840
{\an2}Maybe I could drag it back over.
253
00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:03,640
{\an2}Yeah...
254
00:12:03,680 --> 00:12:06,520
{\an2}Oh, this is actually quite good,
this thing.
255
00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:09,400
{\an2}Should've gone with that at
the start.
256
00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:10,640
{\an2}Right, there he is.
257
00:12:10,680 --> 00:12:13,840
{\an2}"The cat must come out of
the top hole."
258
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:16,560
{\an2}Like, the other option is
to put rope through the roof
259
00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:17,600
{\an2}and tie it.
260
00:12:19,120 --> 00:12:22,520
{\an2}OK.
Tie the rope really fucking tight.
261
00:12:22,560 --> 00:12:23,840
{\an2}Oh, I've got an idea.
262
00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:26,120
{\an2}Can it go in the top
and then come back out?
263
00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:28,840
{\an2}Ah-ha-ha. Up we go.
264
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,920
{\an2}If you fucking detach...
LAUGHING
265
00:12:39,600 --> 00:12:40,760
{\an2}No...
266
00:12:42,760 --> 00:12:43,960
{\an2}He's out.
267
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:46,720
{\an2}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
268
00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:49,520
{\an2}I...I should acknowledge,
"Come on, Patatas. Be bravas."
269
00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:55,160
{\an2}You see, you're coming over
to my side now. I am not.
270
00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:58,160
{\an2}Joanne. You were very pleased when
you came up with the rope idea.
271
00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:01,560
{\an2}I was, yeah. You were. And I asked
if we could just isolate
272
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:04,720
{\an2}your facial expression when you came
up with your rope idea.
273
00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:08,040
{\an1}LAUGHING
274
00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:10,000
{\an2}If you didn't know what
the task was, that would be
275
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:11,920
{\an2}a very troubling still.
276
00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:14,920
{\an1}LAUGHING
277
00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:17,840
{\an2}We're...we're back into crab
and robot territory there.
278
00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:20,320
{\an2}How did Joanne do?
279
00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:21,680
{\an2}The task was to rescue the cat
280
00:13:21,720 --> 00:13:24,320
{\an2}and she did all that in 22 minutes
20 seconds.
281
00:13:24,360 --> 00:13:25,480
{\an2}Oh, right. Good.
APPLAUSE
282
00:13:25,520 --> 00:13:27,480
{\an2}I'd save your applause.
APPLAUSE STOPS
283
00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:30,600
{\an2}Bear in mind that Steve did
it in 2 minutes 19.
284
00:13:30,640 --> 00:13:32,960
{\an1}LAUGHING AND APPLAUSE
285
00:13:34,880 --> 00:13:36,720
{\an2}Right. Time for some adverts now.
286
00:13:36,760 --> 00:13:38,320
{\an2}BORING!!!
287
00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:50,120
{\an1}APPLAUSE
288
00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:52,360
{\an2}You have returned just in
the nick of time.
289
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:55,920
{\an1}There's a cat that needs rescuing,
and he goes by the name of Patatas.
290
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:59,400
{\an2}Yes, Patatas keeps getting stuck
in the dome, poor thing,
291
00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:01,720
{\an2}and now it's time
for Nick and Sophie
292
00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:03,560
{\an2}to let the cat out of the bag.
293
00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:06,600
{\an2}OK. Now, can I go and get some
stuff? OK.
294
00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:08,760
{\an2}Er, I'm just off to the shed.
295
00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:10,960
{\an2}Do you know what? Sod it.
I'm just gonna go in.
296
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:14,320
{\an2}That's sort of like a cat, isn't it?
That fur.
297
00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:15,840
{\an2}Ah! A cat.
298
00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:17,200
{\an2}That's actually a cat.
299
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:18,600
{\an2}Oh, no, it's a wolf.
300
00:14:20,880 --> 00:14:23,400
{\an2}I can, I can see the cat.
Oh, yeah.
301
00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:28,120
{\an2}Think the idea is to sort of
make a little pole thing.
302
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:30,880
{\an2}Oh, I might just go with
the panda, you know.
303
00:14:30,920 --> 00:14:33,600
{\an2}Oh, there he is! I can see him.
304
00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:34,880
{\an2}You've found Patatas.
305
00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:38,080
{\an2}I could make like
a really sticky end.
306
00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:40,040
{\an2}Make a sticky end.
307
00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:43,560
{\an2}Yeah. All right, let me go and have
a look in the shed.
308
00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:45,360
{\an2}I need a fishing rod.
309
00:14:45,400 --> 00:14:49,040
{\an2}It's about fishing.
It's about fishing, isn't it?
310
00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:52,200
{\an2}OK, this looks good.
This looks good.
311
00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:53,720
{\an2}Right, couple of magnets.
Oh, yeah?
312
00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:56,080
{\an2}Couple of magnets
and a sticky end, I think.
313
00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:59,720
{\an2}Couple of magnets and a sticky end.
314
00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:01,720
{\an2}Right down we go.
315
00:15:01,760 --> 00:15:02,880
{\an2}In.
316
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:08,000
{\an2}I'm so close to the bastard.
Come on!
317
00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:12,280
{\an2}Right, here we go.
318
00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:17,880
{\an2}HE GASPS
Oh, my God.
319
00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:20,880
{\an2}Oh, it's actually heavier
than it...it looks.
320
00:15:22,720 --> 00:15:26,320
{\an2}Now, if I was taller...
Big if. Huge if.
321
00:15:35,400 --> 00:15:37,160
{\an2}Patatas.
322
00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:41,840
{\an2}Can... Are you allowed to go in?
323
00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:45,080
{\an2}Right, I order you to go and pick
him up and put him on my hook.
324
00:15:47,040 --> 00:15:50,600
{\an2}Now, my head, my arm can go in,
can't it? Oh, yeah.
325
00:15:50,640 --> 00:15:53,920
{\an2}Between us, we might do this.
Oh, you've got it.
326
00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:55,640
{\an2}Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness.
327
00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:57,800
{\an2}I think I've done it.
328
00:15:57,840 --> 00:16:01,240
{\an2}God, come on. Oh, hang on,
it's very heavy, actually.
329
00:16:01,280 --> 00:16:04,440
{\an2}They didn't say it would be heavy.
Oh, my God, I can't believe it.
330
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:07,120
{\an2}Yes, Patatas. Right, here we go.
331
00:16:08,440 --> 00:16:09,600
{\an2}So...
332
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:15,960
{\an2}Yes!
333
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:18,560
{\an1}AUDIENCE CHEERS AND APPLAUDS
334
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:20,480
{\an2}IN SLOW MOTION: Ye-e-e-s.
335
00:16:20,520 --> 00:16:22,120
{\an2}There you go.
336
00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:24,720
{\an2}So, you've rescued the cat in
the traditional method
337
00:16:24,760 --> 00:16:26,560
{\an2}of flinging it onto a roof.
338
00:16:28,320 --> 00:16:30,960
{\an2}Yes, you, come on,
you little bastard.
339
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:33,160
{\an2}Come on. He's nearly here.
340
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,600
{\an2}Come on. Woo!
341
00:16:34,640 --> 00:16:37,120
{\an2}IN SLOW MOTION: Woo! Woo!
342
00:16:37,160 --> 00:16:38,920
{\an2}We've stopped the clock.
343
00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:40,600
{\an2}Good work.
344
00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:45,200
{\an2}I'm glad you rescued Patatas.
345
00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:47,120
{\an2}Yeah.
Yeah, do you like him?
346
00:16:47,160 --> 00:16:50,480
{\an2}He's all right. I feel a bit
resentful but, yeah, thank you.
347
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:57,680
{\an2}I get the impression that neither of
you were particularly concerned
348
00:16:57,720 --> 00:16:59,760
{\an2}about Patatas' welfare during that.
349
00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:03,400
{\an2}Every man for themself, I think,
isn't it? Yeah. Every cat.
350
00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:06,920
{\an2}Yeah. Did it say that we had
to protect its welfare?
351
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:09,360
{\an2}No, I just think I expected
a sort of internal kindness
352
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:11,280
{\an2}from you, Nick.
353
00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:14,880
{\an2}Yes. Yeah. Yeah.
354
00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:17,720
{\an2}What's Nick's system called?
Couple of magnets and a sticky end.
355
00:17:17,760 --> 00:17:19,440
{\an2}Ah. Yes.
356
00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:21,440
{\an2}And then you flung it through
the hole. The time was...
357
00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:23,240
{\an2}60 minutes?
..14 minutes. Oh.
358
00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:25,880
{\an2}14 minutes.
Sophie took ten minutes...
359
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:28,320
{\an2}Ah!
..to spot, to spot Patatas.
360
00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:34,040
{\an2}She took 26 minutes and six seconds.
361
00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:40,280
{\an2}One person left.
Famously, cats catch robins,
362
00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:42,000
{\an2}but can robins catch cat?
363
00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:50,240
{\an2}This has got to be something,
hasn't it?
364
00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:52,440
{\an2}What's that for?
365
00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:54,880
{\an2}Why is there that on the end?
366
00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:56,880
{\an2}Argh! Is that good?
367
00:17:56,920 --> 00:17:58,960
{\an1}AUDIENCE GROANS
368
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:00,320
{\an2}Here we go.
369
00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:06,680
{\an1}APPLAUSE
370
00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:08,520
{\an2}Patatas?
371
00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:11,800
{\an2}Patatas!
372
00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:19,600
{\an2}I've stopped the clock, John.
Bye-bye! Bye-bye.
373
00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:26,920
{\an2}Can I just add that over
the past few minutes
374
00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:28,680
{\an2}of watching everybody else's,
I've been having
375
00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:30,440
{\an2}a very slow-level heart attack
376
00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:33,240
{\an2}because I thought, "Did you remember
to take it out of the top hole?"
377
00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:35,560
{\an2}You'll be thrilled to hear you did
pop it out of the right hole.
378
00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:37,200
{\an2}I, I did. I've miss...
Yeah, I'm panicking.
379
00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:39,640
{\an2}But... But.
..unfortunately... What?!
380
00:18:39,680 --> 00:18:41,640
{\an2}..I do have to disqualify you.
381
00:18:41,680 --> 00:18:43,720
{\an2}No! What?!
382
00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:46,760
{\an2}No, I'm only joking.
Oh, my God!
383
00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:50,760
{\an2}I'm actually sweating.
384
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:55,480
{\an2}There is, there is slight
extra news, though.
385
00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:58,560
{\an2}No!
We did heavily edit that.
386
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:01,480
{\an2}You got very suspicious, first of
all, that there was no cat at all.
387
00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:03,560
{\an2}Then you thought the boxing glove
might be a distraction.
388
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:06,080
{\an2}Then you opened the grabber.
Then you went to the shed
to look for a hook,
389
00:19:06,120 --> 00:19:08,440
{\an2}and then you came back. Your total
time was three minutes 24,
390
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:13,440
{\an2}which is actually one minute
slower than Steve. Ah...
391
00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:16,080
{\an2}So the actual timings - Sophie gets
one point, obviously.
392
00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:17,840
{\an2}Two to Joanne, three to Nick,
393
00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:21,240
{\an2}four to John, but five, in the end,
to Steve Pemberton.
394
00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:25,400
{\an2}Scoreboard, please.
395
00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:28,160
{\an2}Yes, well, we have three people -
Joanne, Nick and John -
396
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:29,960
{\an2}all on seven points.
Sophie's on two,
397
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,840
{\an2}and Steve's in the lead
with ten points. Hooray!
398
00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:38,920
{\an2}OK, please, may we have
a team task, Alex?
399
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:41,280
{\an2}Ooh, yes. Good shout, Greg-apotamus.
400
00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:45,240
{\an2}And, whoops, I think...
I think...
401
00:19:45,280 --> 00:19:48,640
{\an2}Whoopsie, I think we've blown
the visual effects budget
402
00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:50,760
{\an2}for the whole series. Watch this.
403
00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:02,920
{\an2}Hello.
404
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:04,000
{\an2}Aha!
405
00:20:06,920 --> 00:20:09,760
{\an2}Jesus, John.
Wh... What?
406
00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:12,280
{\an2}Bit ruthless there.
I'm so sorry.
407
00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:13,880
{\an2}Alex?
408
00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:15,560
{\an2}Where's Alex?
409
00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:17,200
{\an2}Do you think we have to find him?
410
00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:22,520
{\an2}No.
411
00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:24,200
{\an2}Oh, God.
412
00:20:24,240 --> 00:20:28,000
{\an2}Woo!
Oh, dear. Woo!
413
00:20:28,040 --> 00:20:29,720
{\an2}A floating envelope
and a floating head.
414
00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:32,280
{\an2}Amazing! Oh, I caught it.
415
00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:34,760
{\an2}Well done.
416
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:35,880
{\an2}Oh.
417
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:38,560
{\an2}Oh.
418
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:41,240
{\an2}Thank you.
Are you a green screen?
419
00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:42,720
{\an2}Yeah, I'm a green screen.
420
00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:44,560
{\an2}Right.
421
00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:49,200
{\an2}Do the most epic thing
using green material
422
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,480
{\an2}and this green screen onesie.
423
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:55,200
{\an2}You have 30 minutes.
Your time starts now.
424
00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:57,280
{\an2}Why is it only green
material, though?
425
00:20:57,320 --> 00:20:58,880
{\an2}It turns everything invisible.
426
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:00,200
{\an2}So...
I don't understand.
427
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:02,160
{\an2}Alex, I think we're gonna spend
about 25 minutes
428
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:03,840
{\an2}working out what green screen is.
429
00:21:03,880 --> 00:21:05,720
{\an2}And then we're gonna come back
with a plan.
430
00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:07,960
{\an2}OK. Yeah.
My head's gonna float away now.
431
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,480
{\an2}Is it really?
432
00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:11,440
{\an2}But no, cos it's not green
behind you.
433
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:13,680
{\an2}Doesn't have to be.
Doesn't it?
434
00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:15,200
{\an2}Thank you.
435
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:17,320
{\an2}Well done, Alex. See you later.
436
00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:25,320
{\an1}APPLAUSE
437
00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:28,240
{\an2}There's a certain little smug look
you get on your face when you,
438
00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:29,840
{\an2}when you've done a thing you like.
439
00:21:29,880 --> 00:21:31,320
{\an2}You liked the floating head
didn't you?
440
00:21:31,360 --> 00:21:33,480
{\an2}Yeah. I don't understand it, either,
but it is...
441
00:21:33,520 --> 00:21:38,000
{\an2}Cos I couldn't see my body at all.
It's so weird.
442
00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:39,760
{\an2}OK, shall we start?
Let's go.
443
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:41,200
{\an2}Let's start with the crazy guys,
444
00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:43,760
{\an2}Nick and Steve, and their
epic vision.
445
00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:52,080
{\an2}Pancakes...
446
00:21:53,120 --> 00:21:54,800
{\an2}ECHOING: Pancakes.
447
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:01,280
{\an2}ECHOING: Pancakes.
448
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:08,800
{\an2}ECHOING: Pancakes.
449
00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:25,840
{\an2}ECHOING: Pancakes.
450
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:40,200
{\an2}Mm!
451
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:50,120
{\an2}Pancakes.
452
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:53,280
{\an2}Mm!
453
00:22:56,120 --> 00:22:57,400
{\an2}Pancake?
454
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:06,120
{\an2}How is it?
455
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:07,440
{\an2}Epic.
456
00:23:09,920 --> 00:23:13,760
{\an1}APPLAUSE
457
00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:17,440
{\an2}Because it was supposed to be
the most ambitious thing,
458
00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:19,800
{\an2}I was thinking, you know,
the scale of ambition
459
00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:23,680
{\an2}perhaps could've been better,
until the mouth came out.
460
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:27,040
{\an2}Just the fact that a,
a wormhole appears,
461
00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:29,760
{\an2}if I may call your mouth that.
462
00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:33,440
{\an2}That's fine. Was there much of
a narrative, Steve, in your mind?
463
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:37,200
{\an2}I was just trying to give, you know,
man who's decided he wants pancakes
464
00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:39,000
{\an2}and is conjuring them up somehow.
465
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:40,880
{\an2}I, I thought he seemed quite smug.
466
00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:43,040
{\an2}Yeah...Yeah.
The pancake guy.
467
00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:46,720
{\an2}Well, that's just
a bit of me coming through.
468
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:48,000
{\an2}Right, break time.
469
00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:50,160
{\an2}Close your eyes, count to 180
470
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:52,640
{\an2}and those nasty little adverts
will have disappeared. Ready?
471
00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:53,680
{\an2}Go!
472
00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:03,760
{\an1}APPLAUSE
473
00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:07,720
{\an2}Hello, and a warm welcome back
to part three of Taskmaster.
474
00:24:07,760 --> 00:24:11,000
{\an2}We're in the middle of a task where
they have to do some epic things.
475
00:24:11,040 --> 00:24:14,520
{\an2}Yeah, man, while wearing green
or blue onesies
476
00:24:14,560 --> 00:24:16,040
{\an2}and using green or blue material,
477
00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:18,600
{\an2}they can let their imaginations
go wild with the endless
478
00:24:18,640 --> 00:24:20,240
{\an2}possibilities of visual effects.
479
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:23,360
{\an2}For example, the team of two
made, er, pancakes.
480
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:26,840
{\an2}Now it's the other team's turn
to blow us away
481
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:30,800
{\an2}with their epic visuals.
It's John, Joanne and Sophie.
482
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:33,560
{\an2}It's very dull being a Tudor queen.
483
00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:35,880
{\an2}I just wish something exciting
would happen.
484
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:38,720
{\an2}Oh!
485
00:24:38,760 --> 00:24:40,560
{\an2}Oh! Lick me.
486
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:43,320
{\an2}You what? Lick, lick me. I'm magic.
487
00:24:43,360 --> 00:24:45,280
{\an2}You're magic?
Oh, go on, then.
488
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:49,800
{\an2}Ooh!
489
00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:51,320
{\an2}Ooh!
490
00:24:51,360 --> 00:24:53,440
{\an2}Ooh!
491
00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:54,800
{\an2}Oh, gosh!
492
00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:56,440
{\an2}Woo!
493
00:24:56,480 --> 00:24:57,920
{\an2}Oh, a floating clock.
494
00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:03,440
{\an2}Oh, God, oh, God!
Oh, bloody hell, it's,
495
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,320
{\an2}it's an armless mannequin.
496
00:25:05,360 --> 00:25:07,480
{\an2}What time is it? Oh, God.
497
00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:10,240
{\an2}I'm about to take flight, John.
498
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:12,120
{\an2}Quite soon, I think.
499
00:25:12,160 --> 00:25:14,000
{\an2}Ooh! Ooh, God, I am. I'm off!
500
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:15,880
{\an2}Oh, blimey!
501
00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:17,480
{\an2}Ooh! Oof! Sorry, oh, sorry.
502
00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:19,440
{\an2}Sorry, sorry, John.
Fucking hell.
503
00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:21,320
{\an2}I didn't... Ooh!
504
00:25:21,360 --> 00:25:23,640
{\an2}Ooh! I might be able to fly.
505
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:26,200
{\an2}Woo!
506
00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:28,200
{\an2}I can. Oh, dear.
507
00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:29,960
{\an2}Oh, I'm flying!
508
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:31,520
{\an2}Ugh. Oh, bloody Nora!
509
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,360
{\an2}Slow flight but good flight.
510
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:40,480
{\an1}APPLAUSE
511
00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:44,120
{\an2}Ah, the classic cry of
the Tudor queen -
512
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:46,640
{\an2}"Bloody Nora, I'm flying!"
513
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:50,840
{\an2}It's actually much better
than I remember.
514
00:25:50,880 --> 00:25:52,720
{\an2}Is it? Yeah.
515
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:54,800
{\an2}I... You wanna, you wanna have seen
the state of us on the day.
516
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:57,160
{\an2}It was carnage.
517
00:25:57,200 --> 00:25:59,840
{\an2}Can I just tell you
what I saw as a viewer?
518
00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:02,960
{\an2}Right. A Tudor queen.
519
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:04,840
{\an2}She licks a frog.
Mm.
520
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:08,040
{\an2}Six unconnected objects
float over her head.
521
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:11,640
{\an2}Yeah. And she announces that she's
gonna fly off and she does.
522
00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:15,440
{\an2}She tells John she's going to
as well. Yes.
523
00:26:15,480 --> 00:26:17,560
{\an2}Also, the unconnected items,
I would argue they're not
524
00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:19,240
{\an2}as unconnected as you've said.
We've got...
525
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:22,440
{\an2}There's no need to take that
withering tone with me, John.
526
00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:25,600
{\an2}We've got two different peppers.
527
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:29,880
{\an2}A red pepper and a yellow pepper
to symbolise heat
528
00:26:29,920 --> 00:26:31,840
{\an2}and s...the sun.
529
00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:37,880
{\an2}Then we've got the,
er, armless torso to represent...
530
00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:40,640
{\an2}Toxic masculinity. Exactly.
531
00:26:42,360 --> 00:26:46,320
{\an1}APPLAUSE
532
00:26:46,360 --> 00:26:49,440
{\an2}Erm, is there any part of you,
Steve, that thinks
533
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:52,240
{\an2}that yours was more epic
than the team of three?
534
00:26:52,280 --> 00:26:53,600
{\an2}Erm, no.
535
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:55,320
{\an1}LAUGHTER
536
00:26:55,360 --> 00:26:59,400
{\an2}Theirs was more ambitious,
more epic. Ours was more...better.
537
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:06,320
{\an2}I'm gonna score them both
very highly cos I,
538
00:27:06,360 --> 00:27:08,720
{\an2}I enjoyed them both very much.
539
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:10,920
{\an2}I'm gonna give the team of three
one more point.
540
00:27:10,960 --> 00:27:14,560
{\an2}I'll give them five points,
and I'll give the beautifully done
541
00:27:14,600 --> 00:27:16,960
{\an2}but sedate pancake journey
four points.
542
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,040
{\an2}There we go.
Congratulations, everyone.
543
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:25,480
{\an2}One more task, please,
little Alex Horne.
544
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:29,440
{\an2}OK, and now it's time to get
hot and sticky in the lab.
545
00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:30,680
{\an2}Ooh!
546
00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:44,160
{\an2}Ah, you again.
Hi, John.
547
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:48,880
{\an2}Ah, OK. Yeah,
I see what's going on here.
548
00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:50,600
{\an2}Where's the...? There's no task.
549
00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:54,680
{\an2}What is it? Where is it?
550
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,800
{\an2}One thing I don't have,
er...
551
00:27:57,840 --> 00:27:59,560
{\an2}WHISPERS: Jesus, you guys.
552
00:28:03,160 --> 00:28:05,680
{\an2}Magnets.
553
00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:08,920
{\an2}"Stick the heaviest thing to
the board using three of
554
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:11,360
{\an2}"the ingredients on the shelves."
555
00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:22,640
{\an2}"Once you've chosen your
ingredients,
556
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:24,040
{\an2}"you may not change your mind."
557
00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:25,560
{\an2}"Heaviest thing that sticks to
the board
558
00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:27,800
{\an2}"for at least one minute wins."
559
00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:29,880
{\an2}Have you actually tested any
of this, though?
560
00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:31,040
{\an2}Am I a lab rat again?
561
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:33,760
{\an2}"You have 12 minutes and you must
choose your thing
562
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,160
{\an2}"in the first two minutes."
563
00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:39,160
{\an2}So, you're looking for the heaviest
thing to stick to the board,
564
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:41,040
{\an2}and it's got to stay there
for a minute.
565
00:28:41,080 --> 00:28:45,040
{\an2}And I've got to create
some kind of unguent.
566
00:28:45,080 --> 00:28:47,320
{\an2}Is that a word? Sounds good.
567
00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:49,440
{\an2}Your time starts now.
568
00:28:49,480 --> 00:28:51,520
{\an2}I've two minutes
to decide what thing.
569
00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:55,040
{\an2}Out of anything in the whole world.
Wait, anything in the whole world?
570
00:28:55,080 --> 00:28:56,720
{\an2}That you can get within
two minutes.
571
00:28:56,760 --> 00:28:58,800
{\an2}OK.
572
00:28:58,840 --> 00:29:01,360
{\an2}This is science, basically.
This is science.
573
00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:04,000
{\an2}This is Elon Musk shit.
It really is.
574
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:11,320
{\an1}APPLAUSE
575
00:29:11,360 --> 00:29:14,080
{\an2}What did you say you want, Steve,
an unguent?
576
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:17,800
{\an2}Yes, I, I lost confidence in
the word halfway through.
577
00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:22,760
{\an2}Well, I asked Alex to look it up
and it means a lubricant for sores.
578
00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:25,240
{\an2}Lubricant for sores?!
Yeah.
579
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:26,760
{\an2}What did I mean?
580
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:30,400
{\an2}I dunno.
Maybe you were chafing that day.
581
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:32,320
{\an2}Who are we going to see now, Alex?
582
00:29:32,360 --> 00:29:37,080
{\an2}First up, here is Sticky Steve,
Stick Mohammed and Joanne McTacky.
583
00:29:37,120 --> 00:29:38,440
{\an2}Here we go.
584
00:29:41,240 --> 00:29:42,520
{\an2}OK, I went for...
585
00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:45,640
{\an2}..a big thing of water.
586
00:29:45,680 --> 00:29:47,160
{\an2}I don't know which is heavier.
587
00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:50,960
{\an2}There is a set of scales there,
if that would help.
588
00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:53,680
{\an2}Oh, sh...!
589
00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:56,680
{\an2}Are we going with David?
Yeah. OK.
590
00:29:56,720 --> 00:29:58,800
{\an2}76g.
591
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:00,400
{\an2}16g.
592
00:30:00,440 --> 00:30:02,960
{\an2}83. I'll go with the fish.
593
00:30:03,000 --> 00:30:05,360
{\an2}I've never adhesed anything before.
Never at all?
594
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:07,800
{\an2}No, it's my first time adhesing.
OK.
595
00:30:07,840 --> 00:30:11,880
{\an8}I'm gonna go with Sellotape,
with Velcro.
596
00:30:11,920 --> 00:30:13,280
{\an8}Marmite. The classic.
597
00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:15,640
{\an2}What's this? Can I use this?
What is it?
598
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:17,520
{\an2}Silicone.
599
00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:19,600
{\an2}Ah. Gonna use those.
600
00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:21,400
{\an2}Velcro.
601
00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:25,640
{\an8}That. Styling gel. And silicone.
602
00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:29,880
{\an8}Sellotape should do it.
Bowl of toffees. Blu Tack.
603
00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:31,920
{\an8}OK, so it's toffee,
Blu Tack, and Sellotape.
604
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:33,720
{\an2}Sellotape, yeah.
605
00:30:33,760 --> 00:30:35,880
{\an2}Ah!
606
00:30:37,720 --> 00:30:38,840
{\an2}OK.
607
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:40,960
{\an2}Here we go. OK.
You've got five minutes 50.
608
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:42,880
{\an2}Oh!
609
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:46,520
{\an2}That's satisfying, isn't it?
There you go. Lovely.
610
00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:49,120
{\an8}OK, so, I mean, I...
611
00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:53,720
{\an7}HE LAUGHS WHEEZILY
612
00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:57,280
{\an2}There's only one bit
of Sellotape. That is... Ah.
613
00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:03,960
{\an2}Now, I don't know if this allowed.
614
00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:06,800
{\an2}But...
615
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:12,080
{\an8}..sort of put my sock....
616
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:17,080
{\an2}It's a big sock, isn't it?
617
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:22,440
{\an2}Oh, God, it's not gonna work.
618
00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:26,240
{\an2}It's not gonna do it on its own.
619
00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:28,640
{\an1}HE LAUGHS
620
00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:30,480
{\an2}You buggers!
621
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,280
{\an2}Oh, come on.
OK, actually, that's fine.
622
00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:37,640
{\an2}I'm gonna stick that there
just...a sec.
623
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:38,680
{\an2}Pretty good.
624
00:31:42,440 --> 00:31:44,000
{\an2}Oh, he's an awkward bugger.
625
00:31:44,040 --> 00:31:46,200
{\an2}It's absolutely no good.
626
00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:49,160
{\an2}It's no good.
627
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:50,640
{\an2}Then I could use some of this.
628
00:31:56,080 --> 00:31:59,080
{\an2}Are you gonna use any Marmite?
I don't think it's necessary.
629
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:03,120
{\an2}Start the clock.
OK, the clock is started.
630
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:04,920
{\an2}SIGHS: OK.
631
00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:06,960
{\an2}He looks quite calm.
632
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:09,720
{\an2}Erm...
MELANCHOLY PIANO MUSIC PLAYS
633
00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:12,240
{\an2}This is,
this is great television.
634
00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:13,880
{\an2}15 seconds gone.
635
00:32:14,920 --> 00:32:17,760
{\an2}Ooh, God. Does the sock even stick?
636
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:24,280
{\an2}There you go.
We'll leave that for a minute. Yeah.
637
00:32:24,320 --> 00:32:26,120
{\an2}45 seconds gone.
638
00:32:26,160 --> 00:32:28,000
{\an2}I'm pleased.
639
00:32:28,040 --> 00:32:29,760
{\an2}Ten.
640
00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:32,400
{\an2}Never spent this long looking
at a naked man before.
641
00:32:32,440 --> 00:32:34,480
{\an2}I thought I'd nailed it,
if I'm honest.
642
00:32:37,840 --> 00:32:40,400
{\an2}Joanne, it's now been there
for a minute. You have succeeded.
643
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:42,240
{\an1}WHISTLE BLOWS
644
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:44,040
{\an2}And that's a minute.
OK.
645
00:32:44,080 --> 00:32:46,200
{\an2}So...
646
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:48,480
{\an2}I'll see if I can find you
a new sock. Thank you.
647
00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:52,880
{\an2}..one.
WHISTLE BLOWS
648
00:32:52,920 --> 00:32:54,000
{\an2}You've succeeded.
649
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:55,280
{\an2}Oh!
650
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:56,760
{\an2}Oh!
651
00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:58,160
{\an2}Oh!
652
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:00,960
{\an1}APPLAUSE
653
00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:03,800
{\an2}So, your summary of your technique
would be pick something
654
00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:05,280
{\an2}relatively light... Yeah.
655
00:33:05,320 --> 00:33:07,440
{\an2}..and just smush it against
the board with whatever.
656
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:09,000
{\an2}Yeah.
LAUGHTER
657
00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:11,320
{\an2}Don't fuck with the system.
Just get it done, get out.
658
00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:13,200
{\an1}LAUGHTER
659
00:33:13,240 --> 00:33:16,840
{\an2}I could smell the lunch.
LAUGHTER
660
00:33:16,880 --> 00:33:19,320
{\an2}You relied on Blu Tack.
661
00:33:19,360 --> 00:33:21,160
{\an2}Blu Tack and a chewy toffee.
662
00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:23,960
{\an2}And you think that gave extra
stability to the statue of David?
663
00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:25,600
{\an2}I thi... Yeah, I think so.
664
00:33:25,640 --> 00:33:28,520
{\an2}I think that that bit of toffee,
right in his crack...
665
00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:30,240
{\an1}LAUGHTER
666
00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:32,040
{\an2}..was the unguent that he needed.
667
00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:34,400
{\an2}That's it.
668
00:33:34,440 --> 00:33:37,480
{\an2}From time to time, on this show,
we start out watching
669
00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:40,080
{\an2}a...an adult doing a task,
670
00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:42,600
{\an2}and what we end up witnessing
is a full break down.
671
00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:44,120
{\an1}LAUGHTER
672
00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:46,080
{\an2}You abandoned your idea
with the water bottle.
673
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:49,840
{\an2}You used Velcro to attach a sock,
which was not the intended object,
674
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:53,120
{\an2}and more pertinently,
not a heavy object. Hmm.
675
00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:55,040
{\an2}And it didn't stick anyway. No.
676
00:33:55,080 --> 00:33:58,040
{\an2}Then you smeared hair gel
and silicone at the sides of it.
677
00:33:58,080 --> 00:33:59,240
{\an2}Hmm.
678
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:01,880
{\an1}And then, that fell off. Now...
LAUGHTER
679
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:04,640
{\an2}What...what part of that
makes you think I'm mad?
680
00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:06,760
{\an1}LAUGHTER
681
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:09,880
{\an2}I genuinely found myself
feeling sorry for you, like...
682
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:12,640
{\an2}In a way that would
get me some points or...? No!
683
00:34:12,680 --> 00:34:14,200
{\an1}LAUGHTER
684
00:34:14,240 --> 00:34:16,320
{\an2}Did he get it to stick for a while?
Not the bottle, no.
685
00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:18,840
{\an2}The bottle was... Well, he chose
the bottle - it didn't stick.
686
00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:20,120
{\an2}I don't think he did the task.
687
00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:23,360
{\an2}He didn't. Well I imagine
that Joanne's fish
688
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:24,720
{\an2}is as light as a feather.
689
00:34:24,760 --> 00:34:26,680
{\an2}No, it's...it's as a light
as four mice.
690
00:34:26,720 --> 00:34:29,160
{\an2}I told you, I lack ambition.
86 grams, four mice.
691
00:34:29,200 --> 00:34:30,880
{\an2}Steve's, 33 and a half mice.
692
00:34:30,920 --> 00:34:32,760
{\an2}713 grams.
693
00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:35,160
{\an2}Nice. One part left to go,
694
00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:39,040
{\an2}and in it, someone will go home
with a biggish calculator.
695
00:34:39,080 --> 00:34:40,960
{\an2}Come on! We'll see you in a minute.
696
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:43,040
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
697
00:34:47,840 --> 00:34:49,800
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
698
00:34:52,520 --> 00:34:56,480
{\an2}Hello, and welcome back.
And to our Welsh viewers,
699
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,200
{\an2}also hello.
700
00:34:58,240 --> 00:34:59,640
{\an1}LAUGHTER
701
00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:02,640
{\an2}There's a task in the lab
which still needs completion.
702
00:35:02,680 --> 00:35:04,520
{\an2}Sticky, Alex? Oh, yes, Greg,
703
00:35:04,560 --> 00:35:06,760
{\an2}but that's what happens
when Daddy forgets to talc me.
704
00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:08,760
{\an2}Tut-tut-tut.
LAUGHTER
705
00:35:08,800 --> 00:35:11,320
{\an2}Coincidentally, the task in play
is also a sticky one.
706
00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:15,160
{\an2}Finally, Sophie and John
take to the board.
707
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:17,160
{\an2}Have you chosen your item?
I've chosen my item,
708
00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:18,800
{\an2}and I'm now questioning it a lot.
709
00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:21,240
{\an2}It's a star.
It's coming off the wall.
710
00:35:21,280 --> 00:35:22,480
{\an2}Great.
711
00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:25,720
{\an2}OK, OK. I'll select the thing.
I'm gonna go chopping board.
712
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:27,320
{\an2}That's a big star.
713
00:35:27,360 --> 00:35:31,720
{\an2}Yeah, but I think the trick is
something here, you see?
714
00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:35,240
{\an2}Could actually...
STAR BANGS
715
00:35:35,280 --> 00:35:36,640
{\an2}Not gone well.
716
00:35:36,680 --> 00:35:38,440
{\an2}Please don't hurt yourself.
Not gone well.
717
00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:41,320
{\an2}Actually, it's quite hef...
It's a bit...probably too heavy.
718
00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:43,440
{\an2}Should've picked it up first.
719
00:35:43,480 --> 00:35:45,880
{\an2}So, we're starting
with Sellotape and Velcro?
720
00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:47,120
{\an2}Yeah. OK.
721
00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:49,800
{\an2}I think I went too big, didn't I?
Well, it's massive.
722
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:52,440
{\an2}Yeah. I got greedy.
723
00:35:52,480 --> 00:35:55,240
{\an2}Right, this is very silly,
but I'm gonna just try this
724
00:35:55,280 --> 00:35:58,080
{\an2}cos I wonder, if you put enough
of these on,
725
00:35:58,120 --> 00:36:00,600
{\an2}whether it actually holds.
726
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:02,840
{\an2}I didn't think I was
a competitive person,
727
00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:07,000
{\an2}but something's happened to me
over the time I've been doing this,
728
00:36:07,040 --> 00:36:10,000
{\an2}and I've fundamentally changed
as a person, I think.
729
00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:11,920
{\an1}LAUGHTER
730
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:15,760
{\an2}Right.
731
00:36:15,800 --> 00:36:17,720
{\an2}Surprising, in't it.
732
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:20,480
{\an2}Right, let's give this a go.
733
00:36:20,520 --> 00:36:22,360
{\an2}It's an initial...
734
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:24,040
{\an2}..an initial go.
735
00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:29,280
{\an2}Start the cock, please.
Cock...clock!
736
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:31,440
{\an2}Start the clock, please.
LAUGHTER
737
00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:33,080
{\an2}Clock's going.
738
00:36:34,840 --> 00:36:37,280
{\an2}I've actually smashed
the shit out of this.
739
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:38,600
{\an2}LAUGHTER
Let's be honest.
740
00:36:38,640 --> 00:36:40,360
{\an2}We were all surprised.
741
00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:42,880
{\an2}Wasn't expecting that.
742
00:36:42,920 --> 00:36:46,000
{\an1}That is absolutely bloody fabulous.
LAUGHTER
743
00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:48,800
{\an2}OK. While that's happening,
744
00:36:48,840 --> 00:36:51,000
{\an2}I'm gonna pick two more.
745
00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:52,840
{\an2}Ah, but I haven't got any liquid.
746
00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:54,880
{\an2}AUDIENCE GROANS
Son of a bitch.
747
00:36:54,920 --> 00:36:56,160
{\an1}LAUGHTER
748
00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:58,840
{\an2}I'll just put some nice
sweets around
749
00:36:58,880 --> 00:37:00,640
{\an2}for whoever might fancy one.
750
00:37:00,680 --> 00:37:02,440
{\an2}That's lovely, in't it.
751
00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:04,120
{\an2}It is wonderful.
752
00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:07,120
{\an2}We're just gonna get the flour
and honey.
753
00:37:07,160 --> 00:37:09,000
{\an8}Right, we're going...
HE LAUGHS
754
00:37:09,040 --> 00:37:11,400
{\an8}..we're going with the flour,
honey and Blu Tack.
755
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:13,720
{\an8}Oh, but this might not be
a bad idea actually.
756
00:37:13,760 --> 00:37:15,760
{\an2}This looks just like glue.
757
00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:17,520
{\an2}There is engineers watching this,
going,
758
00:37:17,560 --> 00:37:19,320
{\an2}"He's absolutely nailed this."
759
00:37:19,360 --> 00:37:20,920
{\an1}LAUGHTER
760
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:22,960
{\an2}For...for centuries,
761
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:25,120
{\an2}humankind has been mixing...
762
00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:27,960
{\an2}No, that's absolute crap.
ALEX LAUGHS
763
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:29,720
{\an2}How bad is that?
764
00:37:29,760 --> 00:37:32,120
{\an2}It has...it has been up there
for a minute now.
765
00:37:32,160 --> 00:37:34,520
{\an2}That's fantastic, in't it?
See you later.
766
00:37:34,560 --> 00:37:36,280
{\an2}Bye-bye.
767
00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:39,720
{\an2}Right, it's a case
of dotting the paste.
768
00:37:39,760 --> 00:37:43,440
{\an2}I think what I'm doing here is
making the chopping board heavier.
769
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:48,960
{\an2}Five, four, three, two, one.
770
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:51,480
{\an2}Please let go.
Start the timer, please.
771
00:37:55,040 --> 00:37:56,920
{\an2}How long have we got left?
20 seconds.
772
00:37:56,960 --> 00:38:00,360
{\an2}Shit the bed. Shit the bed.
Shit the bed. Shit the bed!
773
00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:03,040
{\an1}LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
774
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:11,320
{\an2}Well, you summed it up yourself,
really, didn't you?
775
00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:14,120
{\an2}Yeah. "I've absolutely smashed
the shit out of this."
776
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:17,440
{\an2}I think my intelligence may lie
in manual labour.
777
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:19,720
{\an1}LAUGHTER
778
00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:22,320
{\an2}Structural integrity,
I fucking knew.
779
00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:25,040
{\an2}You...you're talking
with the passion
780
00:38:25,080 --> 00:38:26,920
{\an2}of a turn-of-the-century
mill worker.
781
00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:28,680
{\an1}LAUGHTER
782
00:38:28,720 --> 00:38:31,600
{\an2}It was a very heavy star.
It was 3.3kg.
783
00:38:31,640 --> 00:38:33,360
{\an1}WHOOPING AND APPLAUSE
784
00:38:36,360 --> 00:38:38,640
{\an2}John, I had such hope for you.
785
00:38:38,680 --> 00:38:41,520
{\an2}At one point, I thought, "This man
is gonna be the face of Blu Tack
786
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:43,520
{\an2}"if he pulls it off."
LAUGHTER
787
00:38:43,560 --> 00:38:47,000
{\an2}I think I forgot you could pick
anything in the world
788
00:38:47,040 --> 00:38:48,600
{\an2}to stick to the white board. Yeah.
789
00:38:48,640 --> 00:38:51,320
{\an2}And I suddenly fixated on the stuff
that was in front of me.
790
00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:53,440
{\an2}And just, solely,
the chopping board.
791
00:38:53,480 --> 00:38:56,920
{\an2}And you used honey and flour
to try and... Was it honey?
792
00:38:56,960 --> 00:38:59,040
{\an2}Well, after the Blu Tack failed,
he said,
793
00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:00,960
{\an2}"We're now entering
the world of paste."
794
00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:03,000
{\an1}LAUGHTER
795
00:39:03,040 --> 00:39:04,840
{\an2}Let's give some points out.
796
00:39:04,880 --> 00:39:06,880
{\an2}Nick and John both chose
heavy things
797
00:39:06,920 --> 00:39:08,440
{\an2}but didn't manage to stick them on.
798
00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:10,120
{\an2}So, it's zero points
to John and Nick.
799
00:39:10,160 --> 00:39:13,560
{\an2}Joanne, you get a full three points
for your 85 gram fish.
800
00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:16,080
{\an2}Keep it simple. Steve, four points.
801
00:39:16,120 --> 00:39:18,600
{\an2}But Sophie's was four times heavier
than his. Wow. Wow.
802
00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:20,800
{\an2}And she gets the full five points!
Well done, Sophie.
803
00:39:20,840 --> 00:39:23,200
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
804
00:39:23,240 --> 00:39:24,960
{\an2}Let's see a scoreboard, shall we?
805
00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:28,440
{\an2}OK. Well, Nick, at the bottom,
I'm afraid, with 11 points.
806
00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:31,280
{\an2}And, Steve, at the top
with 18 points, at the moment.
807
00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:34,240
{\an1}WHISTLING AND APPLAUSE
808
00:39:35,360 --> 00:39:37,960
{\an2}Very good. Right, can you please
all head to the stage
809
00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:40,000
{\an2}for the final task of the show?
810
00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:42,440
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
811
00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:46,360
{\an2}Hey, there, baby cakes.
812
00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:49,120
{\an2}That's me.
Who's reading the task out?
813
00:39:49,160 --> 00:39:50,760
{\an2}Sophie Willan.
814
00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:54,320
{\an2}"Guess the movie that your
team-mate is saying.
815
00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:56,040
{\an2}"Your team-mate can only say
816
00:39:56,080 --> 00:39:59,720
{\an2}"the first three letters
of each word of the movie title.
817
00:39:59,760 --> 00:40:02,320
{\an2}"Most movies in each round wins.
818
00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:04,880
{\an2}One member of the team will go
inside the movie booth.
819
00:40:04,920 --> 00:40:07,600
{\an2}And they'll pop their head
through the little hole.
820
00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:10,160
{\an2}I will show you some cards
with movie titles in.
821
00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:13,320
{\an2}And they will also have the first
three letters of each word.
822
00:40:13,360 --> 00:40:16,680
{\an2}So if it said "Jurassic Park",
it will also say, "JUR PAR".
823
00:40:16,720 --> 00:40:18,480
{\an2}And all you're allowed
to say is, "JUR PAR".
824
00:40:18,520 --> 00:40:20,640
{\an2}"JUR PAR". "JUR PAR".
There's gonna be three rounds.
825
00:40:20,680 --> 00:40:24,520
{\an2}The team of two are gonna go first.
Nick, please enter the booth.
826
00:40:24,560 --> 00:40:27,000
{\an2}There we go. Oh, lovely.
827
00:40:27,040 --> 00:40:28,640
{\an2}Lovely stuff. OK, good luck,
everyone.
828
00:40:28,680 --> 00:40:31,680
{\an2}Your time starts when I reveal
the first card. OK, OK.
829
00:40:31,720 --> 00:40:33,360
{\an2}Good luck. And off we go.
830
00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:36,200
{\an2}"THE NUT PRO." "THE NUT..."
The Nutty Professor.
831
00:40:36,240 --> 00:40:37,680
{\an2}TING
Yeah.
832
00:40:37,720 --> 00:40:39,640
{\an2}"PUL FIC." Pulp Fiction.
833
00:40:39,680 --> 00:40:41,320
{\an2}TING
Ooh.
834
00:40:41,360 --> 00:40:42,720
{\an2}"BAM." Bambi.
835
00:40:42,760 --> 00:40:45,120
{\an2}TING
"FIG CLU."
836
00:40:45,160 --> 00:40:48,360
{\an2}LAUGHTER
Pardon?"FIG CLU."
837
00:40:48,400 --> 00:40:50,200
{\an2}"FIG CLU."
838
00:40:50,240 --> 00:40:51,920
{\an2}Fig? "CLU."
839
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:54,680
{\an2}"FIH CLU." "FI CL-Uh", "FI CL-Uh".
Fi-cloo. Fi-cloo to you.
840
00:40:54,720 --> 00:40:56,200
{\an2}I thought... Fight Club!
841
00:40:56,240 --> 00:40:57,920
{\an2}TING
Yes.
842
00:40:57,960 --> 00:41:00,120
{\an2}"THE..." "THE SOM ABO MAR."
843
00:41:00,160 --> 00:41:03,400
{\an2}There's Something About...
There's Something About Mary.
844
00:41:03,440 --> 00:41:04,680
{\an2}TING
Yes.
845
00:41:04,720 --> 00:41:07,120
{\an2}"SAV PRI RYA."
846
00:41:07,160 --> 00:41:09,160
{\an1}LAUGHTER
847
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:10,760
{\an2}Say...?
848
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:12,840
{\an2}"SAV PRI RYA." Saving Private Ryan!
849
00:41:12,880 --> 00:41:14,280
{\an2}TING
Yes.
850
00:41:14,320 --> 00:41:16,040
{\an1}KLAXON
851
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:19,040
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
852
00:41:19,080 --> 00:41:21,480
{\an2}They've scored a total
of six movies.
853
00:41:21,520 --> 00:41:23,320
{\an2}Not bad, not bad.
854
00:41:23,360 --> 00:41:26,200
{\an1}WHOOPING AND APPLAUSE
855
00:41:28,400 --> 00:41:29,960
{\an2}Ready? OK. Right.
856
00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:33,040
{\an2}Good luck, Sophie. Thank you.
Your time starts now.
857
00:41:33,080 --> 00:41:34,600
{\an2}"DUR."
858
00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:36,600
{\an2}Goldfinger. "DUR."
859
00:41:36,640 --> 00:41:38,400
{\an2}Pass.
860
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:39,920
{\an2}Oh. "THE GOO."
861
00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:42,520
{\an1}LAUGHTER
862
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:43,880
{\an2}"THE GOO."
863
00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:45,600
{\an2}"THE GOO."
864
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:46,920
{\an2}Goonies. Yes!
865
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:48,360
{\an2}TING
The Goonies.
866
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:49,640
{\an2}"TIT."
867
00:41:49,680 --> 00:41:50,800
{\an2}Titanic.
868
00:41:50,840 --> 00:41:52,960
{\an2}TING
"WON..." "WON WOM."
869
00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:54,200
{\an2}Wonder Woman. Wonder.
870
00:41:54,240 --> 00:41:57,040
{\an2}TING
"WHA WOM WAN."
871
00:41:57,080 --> 00:41:59,160
{\an2}What Women Want.
TING
872
00:41:59,200 --> 00:42:01,200
{\an2}"MOU ROU." Moulin Rouge.
873
00:42:01,240 --> 00:42:02,920
{\an2}TING
"HEA."Heat.
874
00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:05,360
{\an2}TING
"THE SHA RED."
875
00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:07,160
{\an2}Shawshank Redemption. Yes!
876
00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:09,240
{\an2}TING
"SEV."Seven.
877
00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:11,800
{\an2}TING
"THE BOU IDE."
878
00:42:11,840 --> 00:42:13,600
{\an2}The Bourne Identity.Yeah!
TING
879
00:42:13,640 --> 00:42:15,400
{\an2}KLAXON
Ooh.Oh.
880
00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:17,560
{\an2}Well done.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
881
00:42:19,240 --> 00:42:21,640
{\an2}Only one pass there. "GOO."
It was Goodfellas.
882
00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:23,240
{\an2}Ah. Goodfellas.
883
00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:25,760
{\an2}That team scored a total
of eight movies. Wow.
884
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:27,640
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
885
00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:29,320
{\an2}1-0.
886
00:42:29,360 --> 00:42:31,680
{\an2}Time for Steve Pemberton
to enter the booth.
887
00:42:31,720 --> 00:42:33,600
{\an2}I will enter the booth.
888
00:42:33,640 --> 00:42:35,800
{\an1}LAUGHTER
889
00:42:37,120 --> 00:42:40,120
{\an2}Steve, your time starts now.
890
00:42:40,160 --> 00:42:41,320
{\an2}"THE MAT."
891
00:42:41,360 --> 00:42:43,120
{\an2}Matrix, The Matrix.
TING
892
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:44,920
{\an2}"THE MUM."The Mummy.
TING
893
00:42:44,960 --> 00:42:46,080
{\an2}"BRA."
894
00:42:46,120 --> 00:42:47,440
{\an2}Braveheart.
TING
895
00:42:47,480 --> 00:42:48,560
{\an2}"DON BRA."
896
00:42:48,600 --> 00:42:50,400
{\an2}Donnie Da... "DON BRA." Dom Brasco?
897
00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:52,720
{\an2}"DON.! Donnie Brasco?
898
00:42:52,760 --> 00:42:54,000
{\an2}Yeah. Correct.
TING
899
00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:55,480
{\an2}"MIL DOL BAB."
900
00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:57,440
{\an2}Million Dollar Baby.
TING
901
00:42:57,480 --> 00:42:58,680
{\an2}"MIS IMP."
902
00:42:58,720 --> 00:43:01,080
{\an2}Mr Impr... "MIS IMP."
Mr Incredible? Um, uh...
903
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:03,640
{\an2}"MIS IMP." "MIS IMP."
LAUGHTER
904
00:43:03,680 --> 00:43:05,240
{\an2}"MIS..." Mission Impossible.
905
00:43:05,280 --> 00:43:07,080
{\an1}TING, KLAXON
906
00:43:07,120 --> 00:43:10,160
{\an2}APPLAUSE
They scored six movies.
907
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,840
{\an2}There we are.
APPLAUSE
908
00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:15,080
{\an2}John, please go into the booth.
909
00:43:15,120 --> 00:43:17,120
{\an2}Hello, Alex. Hello, John.
910
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:18,720
{\an1}LAUGHTER
911
00:43:18,760 --> 00:43:20,320
{\an2}"THO."
912
00:43:20,360 --> 00:43:21,720
{\an2}Foursome. "THO."
913
00:43:21,760 --> 00:43:22,840
{\an2}Thor.
914
00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:25,360
{\an2}TING
"BAD SAN."
915
00:43:25,400 --> 00:43:26,480
{\an2}Bad Santa.
916
00:43:26,520 --> 00:43:28,560
{\an2}TING
"SNA."
917
00:43:28,600 --> 00:43:30,120
{\an2}Snatch.
TING
918
00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:31,400
{\an2}"BAT BEG."
919
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:33,120
{\an2}"BAT BIG."
920
00:43:33,160 --> 00:43:35,600
{\an2}Batman, Big Man.
LAUGHTER
921
00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:37,280
{\an2}"BAT BEG."
922
00:43:37,320 --> 00:43:38,680
{\an2}Batman...
923
00:43:38,720 --> 00:43:40,640
{\an2}"BEG."Batman Begins.Begins!
TING
924
00:43:40,680 --> 00:43:42,720
{\an2}"THE BOU SUP."
925
00:43:42,760 --> 00:43:44,600
{\an2}The Bourne Supremacy.
TING
926
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:45,800
{\an2}"JUM."
927
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:47,400
{\an2}Jumungo.
928
00:43:47,440 --> 00:43:49,840
{\an2}"JUM."Jumanji.
TING
929
00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:51,240
{\an2}"MEE THE PAR."
930
00:43:51,280 --> 00:43:53,120
{\an2}Meet The Parents. Meet The...
931
00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:56,240
{\an2}"THE USH SUS." The Usual Suspects.
The Usual Suspects.
932
00:43:56,280 --> 00:43:57,600
{\an2}"M..."
933
00:43:57,640 --> 00:43:59,080
{\an2}"MRS DOU."
934
00:43:59,120 --> 00:44:00,640
{\an2}Doubtfire. Doubtfire.
935
00:44:00,680 --> 00:44:03,680
{\an1}KLAXON
They got eight. Congratulations.
936
00:44:03,720 --> 00:44:06,200
{\an1}APPLAUSE
937
00:44:06,240 --> 00:44:07,680
{\an2}Well done.
938
00:44:07,720 --> 00:44:10,840
{\an2}Can I ask which cinema I can see
Batman Big Man in?
939
00:44:10,880 --> 00:44:12,360
{\an1}LAUGHTER
940
00:44:12,400 --> 00:44:15,480
{\an2}And if that's sold out,
can I see Jumungo somewhere?
941
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:19,280
{\an2}We are gonna make it harder
in round three. Oh, no.
942
00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:21,640
{\an2}You're now gonna say the last
three letters of each movie.
943
00:44:21,680 --> 00:44:23,040
{\an2}What? Wow.
944
00:44:23,080 --> 00:44:25,200
{\an2}Yeah. Nick, please enter the booth
for a second time.
945
00:44:25,240 --> 00:44:26,680
{\an2}This is terrifying.
946
00:44:26,720 --> 00:44:28,280
{\an2}Your time starts now.
947
00:44:28,320 --> 00:44:29,760
{\an2}"ROY."
948
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:31,520
{\an2}Rob Roy?
949
00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:34,400
{\an2}"ROY." Roy? "ROY." "ROY."
950
00:44:34,440 --> 00:44:36,400
{\an2}Roy. "ROY." Roy.
951
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:38,360
{\an2}Pass.
952
00:44:38,400 --> 00:44:41,040
{\an2}"RON MAN." "RON MAN."
953
00:44:41,080 --> 00:44:43,720
{\an2}Something "ron", something "man".
"RON MAN."
954
00:44:43,760 --> 00:44:45,520
{\an2}Something...something... Iron Man!
Yes!
955
00:44:45,560 --> 00:44:47,200
{\an2}TING
"EED."
956
00:44:47,240 --> 00:44:49,440
{\an2}LAUGHTER
"EED."
957
00:44:49,480 --> 00:44:50,840
{\an2}Eed? "EED." Eed.
958
00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:52,720
{\an2}S...Speed?Yes!
TING
959
00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:54,400
{\an2}"ULL TAL KET."
960
00:44:55,840 --> 00:44:58,040
{\an2}ULL TAL KET." Old...Old Town Market.
961
00:44:58,080 --> 00:45:00,040
{\an2}Oh, no.
LAUGHTER
962
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:01,360
{\an2}"ULL TAL KET."
963
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,240
{\an2}Huh? "ULL TAL KET."
964
00:45:03,280 --> 00:45:05,360
{\an2}Full Metal Jacket.Yes!
TING
965
00:45:05,400 --> 00:45:06,760
{\an1}KLAXON
966
00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:09,320
{\an1}APPLAUSE
967
00:45:09,360 --> 00:45:11,640
{\an2}They got three.
They did not get "ROY."
968
00:45:11,680 --> 00:45:13,480
{\an2}Troy. It is Troy. Ah!
969
00:45:13,520 --> 00:45:15,280
{\an2}Out you come, Nick. Out you come.
OK.
970
00:45:15,320 --> 00:45:18,120
{\an2}Joanne... Yep. ..please enter the
booth. So, it's three to beat.
971
00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:19,960
{\an2}If they do that, it's a whitewash.
OK, happy?
972
00:45:20,000 --> 00:45:21,440
{\an2}Yeah. Just getting comfy.
973
00:45:21,480 --> 00:45:23,800
{\an2}You don't look comfy, Joanne.
LAUGHTER
974
00:45:23,840 --> 00:45:26,240
{\an2}I'm glad you've got a body normally.
975
00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:29,280
{\an2}It's a lot, the face on its own,
isn't it? It is a bit. I know.
976
00:45:29,320 --> 00:45:31,280
{\an2}LAUGHTER
So, last three letters,
977
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:32,520
{\an2}starting now.
978
00:45:32,560 --> 00:45:34,080
{\an2}"ION..." "THE..." So...
979
00:45:34,120 --> 00:45:35,920
{\an2}"ION ING."
980
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:37,480
{\an2}"THE ION ING."
981
00:45:37,520 --> 00:45:38,920
{\an2}The Shining. No.
982
00:45:38,960 --> 00:45:40,840
{\an2}"ION ING."
983
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:42,960
{\an2}"THE..."Pass.
SHE GROWLS
984
00:45:43,000 --> 00:45:44,440
{\an1}LAUGHTER
985
00:45:44,480 --> 00:45:46,720
{\an2}"BEE. "BEE."
986
00:45:46,760 --> 00:45:50,120
{\an2}"BEE." "BEE."
It's more difficult than Speed.
987
00:45:50,160 --> 00:45:52,880
{\an2}LAUGHTER
Try that one for a laugh.
988
00:45:52,920 --> 00:45:55,880
{\an2}Um... Ah, for fuck's sake.
LAUGHTER
989
00:45:55,920 --> 00:45:57,360
{\an2}"ISS ISS ANG ANG."
990
00:45:57,400 --> 00:45:59,880
{\an1}Oh, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. Yeah!
TING
991
00:45:59,920 --> 00:46:02,880
{\an2}They got one. That was...
SOPHIE: That was a tough round.
992
00:46:02,920 --> 00:46:05,880
{\an2}Oh, yeah. "THE ION ING."
You will kick yourself.
993
00:46:05,920 --> 00:46:08,680
{\an2}Steve got it. The Lion King.
Oh, my God. The Lion King.
994
00:46:08,720 --> 00:46:10,880
{\an2}And Barbie was "BIE". Oh.
995
00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:12,880
{\an2}Oh, come on!
LAUGHTER
996
00:46:12,920 --> 00:46:15,600
{\an2}So, that means team of three
got two, the team of two got one.
997
00:46:15,640 --> 00:46:18,040
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
998
00:46:18,080 --> 00:46:20,400
{\an2}Come down and join me.
We'll add that to the final scores.
999
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:26,800
{\an2}Very tight game in the end. 2-1.
1000
00:46:26,840 --> 00:46:28,480
{\an2}Well, they clawed one back.
1001
00:46:28,520 --> 00:46:30,560
{\an2}Five points to the team of three.
Add them on. Yes.
1002
00:46:30,600 --> 00:46:32,360
{\an2}Three points to the others?
1003
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:33,960
{\an2}Which means, Nick... Yes.
1004
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:36,280
{\an2}..you came last. Oh.
1005
00:46:36,320 --> 00:46:38,000
{\an2}Tight at the top, though. Joanne,
1006
00:46:38,040 --> 00:46:39,560
{\an2}a massive 20 points.
1007
00:46:39,600 --> 00:46:42,280
{\an2}But the winner, for a second week
in a row is Steve, with 21 points!
1008
00:46:42,320 --> 00:46:45,240
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1009
00:46:45,280 --> 00:46:47,160
{\an2}He's running away with it!
1010
00:46:47,200 --> 00:46:49,400
{\an2}Steve Pemberton wins.
1011
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:54,400
{\an2}Please head upside down to the stage
and upturn your prizes!
1012
00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:57,840
{\an1}CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1013
00:46:57,880 --> 00:46:59,200
{\an2}Subtitles by Red Bee Media