1 00:00:04,830 --> 00:00:05,910 Well, well, well. 2 00:00:05,910 --> 00:00:07,110 Ooh! Oh, no, no. 3 00:00:08,510 --> 00:00:10,350 Yes! Argh! JOANNE HISSES 4 00:00:12,150 --> 00:00:13,550 Argh! 5 00:00:13,550 --> 00:00:15,150 Erm... 6 00:00:15,150 --> 00:00:16,470 Quite windy today. Yeah. 7 00:00:16,470 --> 00:00:17,750 Christ. 8 00:00:17,750 --> 00:00:19,790 Whoo! Wrong way. 9 00:00:19,790 --> 00:00:21,110 That's how you do it, baby. 10 00:00:21,110 --> 00:00:22,950 OK. 11 00:00:22,950 --> 00:00:24,190 Oh, my God! 12 00:00:24,190 --> 00:00:26,470 VARIOUS CRIES AND YELLS 13 00:00:26,470 --> 00:00:28,310 APPLAUSE 14 00:00:29,430 --> 00:00:35,390 This programme contains strong language and adult humour 15 00:00:36,990 --> 00:00:40,670 Thank you! Hello, welcome to Taskmaster, 16 00:00:40,670 --> 00:00:43,110 the show where elite comic minds unravel 17 00:00:43,110 --> 00:00:46,230 like a ball of wool. We're essentially in the Colosseum, 18 00:00:46,230 --> 00:00:47,950 but with a little less stabby stabby, 19 00:00:47,950 --> 00:00:50,950 and a disappointing lack of... HE ROARS 20 00:00:50,950 --> 00:00:53,590 Let the games commence. 21 00:00:53,590 --> 00:00:58,270 Please welcome Joanne McNally... APPLAUSE 22 00:00:58,270 --> 00:01:00,630 ..John Robins... APPLAUSE 23 00:01:00,630 --> 00:01:02,990 ..Nick Mohammed... APPLAUSE 24 00:01:02,990 --> 00:01:04,950 ..Sophie Willan... APPLAUSE 25 00:01:04,950 --> 00:01:08,390 ..and Steve Pemberton. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 26 00:01:08,390 --> 00:01:11,150 And sitting next to me, a man who looks like 27 00:01:11,150 --> 00:01:14,750 a poodle who just about escaped a house fire on his hind legs... 28 00:01:14,750 --> 00:01:16,830 LAUGHTER 29 00:01:16,830 --> 00:01:21,190 ..Little Alex Horne. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 30 00:01:21,190 --> 00:01:23,550 Mm, thank you. Thank you, Greg. 31 00:01:25,110 --> 00:01:26,910 Well, hi, Greg. 32 00:01:28,430 --> 00:01:29,830 How was my weekend? 33 00:01:29,830 --> 00:01:32,710 Well...it was one of the great weekends. 34 00:01:32,710 --> 00:01:34,430 Yeah. I caught up with my aunt. 35 00:01:34,430 --> 00:01:36,790 Yeah. Which was amazing, cos she's a really fast runner, 36 00:01:36,790 --> 00:01:39,590 and I normally lag behind. We did our relay. 37 00:01:39,590 --> 00:01:41,110 You know we do the relay in the village, 38 00:01:41,110 --> 00:01:43,670 all the friends and family, and we did the 4x100. 39 00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:46,110 Yeah. So 100 people doing four metres each and just... 40 00:01:47,470 --> 00:01:50,870 ..and I was parallel with Aunt Polly, so, erm, 41 00:01:50,870 --> 00:01:53,230 overtook her in the final metre of the four and, 42 00:01:53,230 --> 00:01:55,870 uh, first time I've managed to do that. 43 00:01:55,870 --> 00:01:57,470 And we can came eight... 44 00:01:57,470 --> 00:01:58,590 88th we came. 45 00:01:58,590 --> 00:02:00,830 LAUGHTER 46 00:02:02,870 --> 00:02:04,390 Woof, woof, woof, woof. 47 00:02:07,430 --> 00:02:08,910 All right, prize task time. 48 00:02:08,910 --> 00:02:11,950 What have we got for episode six, Alex? You asked them to bring in 49 00:02:11,950 --> 00:02:14,310 the best thing that you can get into. 50 00:02:14,310 --> 00:02:16,670 Hmm. There's the usual five points for 51 00:02:16,670 --> 00:02:17,990 the best thing that you can get into, 52 00:02:17,990 --> 00:02:20,350 and I thought it worth pointing out that there's also three points 53 00:02:20,350 --> 00:02:22,670 for the most mid-table thing. 54 00:02:22,670 --> 00:02:24,950 Back to you, Greg. Appreciate you, brother. 55 00:02:27,350 --> 00:02:30,590 All right, John, what's the best thing that... 56 00:02:30,590 --> 00:02:33,190 It's quite a tricky one to phrase, this, isn't it? 57 00:02:33,190 --> 00:02:34,710 ..you'd like me to get into? 58 00:02:36,150 --> 00:02:38,470 Greg, you've got to get into memes. 59 00:02:38,470 --> 00:02:40,150 John, I have not. 60 00:02:40,150 --> 00:02:42,030 LAUGHTER 61 00:02:42,030 --> 00:02:44,470 So what I have done to help you be more active 62 00:02:44,470 --> 00:02:50,470 in the meme scene is I've created my very own Taskmaster memes. 63 00:02:50,470 --> 00:02:52,150 Take a look at this, Greg. 64 00:02:57,870 --> 00:03:00,150 Maybe I'm more into memes than I thought. 65 00:03:01,350 --> 00:03:03,190 Do you want to see another meme? Second meme. 66 00:03:12,110 --> 00:03:14,470 It's a bit of fun. Greg, you're having fun. 67 00:03:14,470 --> 00:03:17,430 Yeah. I'm an old man sweating looking at something 68 00:03:17,430 --> 00:03:19,790 I don't want to get into. 69 00:03:19,790 --> 00:03:20,910 Hi, Nick. 70 00:03:20,910 --> 00:03:22,830 What have you brought me that I might want to get into? 71 00:03:22,830 --> 00:03:27,350 I thought, and particularly cos you are often very hot, 72 00:03:27,350 --> 00:03:30,030 one of the things that you could get into 73 00:03:30,030 --> 00:03:35,950 would be the concept of adding a ice cube to a glass of white wine. 74 00:03:41,990 --> 00:03:44,910 Wow. Just one single cube. 75 00:03:44,910 --> 00:03:46,270 Here it is. Lovely. 76 00:03:49,670 --> 00:03:51,670 Honestly, tr... Don't knock it till you've tried it, 77 00:03:51,670 --> 00:03:53,190 because it really works. 78 00:03:53,190 --> 00:03:55,470 I'm not putting ice in my wine, Nick. 79 00:03:55,470 --> 00:03:56,670 Just a single cube? 80 00:03:56,670 --> 00:04:00,030 Not at all, because I'm not a pussy. 81 00:04:02,990 --> 00:04:05,350 You're just not bringing anything new to me, Nick. 82 00:04:05,350 --> 00:04:07,230 If I want cold wine, I'm going to put it in my fridge. 83 00:04:07,230 --> 00:04:08,950 Obviously it goes in the fridge at the start, 84 00:04:08,950 --> 00:04:11,990 but I'm saying that when you pour it out and it's sort of sat there... 85 00:04:11,990 --> 00:04:13,510 So what you've brought in 86 00:04:13,510 --> 00:04:15,910 is the ability for me to have a glass of wine, uh... 87 00:04:15,910 --> 00:04:17,190 I didn't... But I didn't. 88 00:04:17,190 --> 00:04:18,750 ..at a certain distance from my fridge. 89 00:04:18,750 --> 00:04:21,070 LAUGHTER 90 00:04:21,070 --> 00:04:23,430 OK, Sophie, take over, for God's sake. 91 00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:25,430 I can't really, cos I realised I've forgotten 92 00:04:25,430 --> 00:04:27,030 and brought the wrong present. 93 00:04:27,030 --> 00:04:28,950 Is it worth explaining at the sixth episode 94 00:04:28,950 --> 00:04:30,910 of this series that these aren't presents for Greg? 95 00:04:30,910 --> 00:04:33,590 Oh, are they not? I do judge it, so it's... You do. 96 00:04:33,590 --> 00:04:35,310 It's very wise... I thought we had to give you a gift. 97 00:04:35,310 --> 00:04:36,870 It's wise if it appeals to me. 98 00:04:36,870 --> 00:04:39,310 I thought, "He's a bit greedy, in't he?" 99 00:04:39,310 --> 00:04:40,470 LAUGHTER 100 00:04:42,190 --> 00:04:45,350 This is a human hamster ball... Yeah? 101 00:04:45,350 --> 00:04:48,990 ..that you can get into and have a wheel. Roll around. Roll around. 102 00:04:48,990 --> 00:04:50,830 It is big. Yeah. 103 00:04:50,830 --> 00:04:52,270 Ooh! 104 00:04:52,270 --> 00:04:53,550 Freedom. 105 00:04:55,470 --> 00:04:56,950 It's the opposite of freedom. 106 00:04:56,950 --> 00:04:59,910 Simple. Why might I like it? Why might anyone like it? 107 00:04:59,910 --> 00:05:02,190 Well, who doesn't want to roll around? 108 00:05:04,510 --> 00:05:06,830 Oh, come on, eh? 109 00:05:06,830 --> 00:05:08,550 Would you like to go down a hill in one of those? 110 00:05:08,550 --> 00:05:10,270 I would absolutely love to get in that. 111 00:05:10,270 --> 00:05:13,230 OK, we'll push you down a hill. 112 00:05:13,230 --> 00:05:14,910 Joanne, you all right? 113 00:05:14,910 --> 00:05:17,750 Yes, so I, as you know have been, er, 114 00:05:17,750 --> 00:05:20,110 been quite experiential with the presents. 115 00:05:20,110 --> 00:05:22,590 And it hasn't worked in my... They're not presents! 116 00:05:26,110 --> 00:05:29,390 So this time, I've gone for a sleeping sarcophagi. 117 00:05:29,390 --> 00:05:31,110 So that's me in the thing. 118 00:05:31,110 --> 00:05:32,750 LAUGHTER 119 00:05:32,750 --> 00:05:35,710 You can be Tutankhamun at night, and you can close your eyes 120 00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:38,070 and you're in the Valley of the Kings. 121 00:05:38,070 --> 00:05:40,390 Yeah. It's all gold. Yeah, I can see it. Yeah. 122 00:05:40,390 --> 00:05:42,830 LAUGHTER 123 00:05:42,830 --> 00:05:44,830 Steve, only you can save this round. 124 00:05:44,830 --> 00:05:47,910 I hope I can do something that you will enjoy as your present. 125 00:05:47,910 --> 00:05:49,550 I have brought you... 126 00:05:49,550 --> 00:05:51,550 LAUGHTER 127 00:05:56,470 --> 00:05:58,390 As the prize, uh, 128 00:05:58,390 --> 00:06:00,710 I have brought you in today's Guardian newspaper. 129 00:06:00,710 --> 00:06:01,790 Oh. 130 00:06:01,790 --> 00:06:05,110 I thought, like, a hobby, you could get into doing cryptic crosswords. 131 00:06:05,110 --> 00:06:07,470 This better get good soon, mate. OK. 132 00:06:08,550 --> 00:06:09,630 Can I say, by the way, 133 00:06:09,630 --> 00:06:12,390 there was a Guardian in my dressing room today? 134 00:06:12,390 --> 00:06:13,550 Yeah, and mine. And mine. 135 00:06:13,550 --> 00:06:15,270 And there was also one in mine. Right. 136 00:06:15,270 --> 00:06:17,630 Well, did anyone do the cryptic crossword? 137 00:06:17,630 --> 00:06:18,670 No. All right. 138 00:06:18,670 --> 00:06:20,150 I won't open that lefty stuff. 139 00:06:22,270 --> 00:06:25,910 OK, well, what I hope someone might have been impressed by 140 00:06:25,910 --> 00:06:28,270 is the fact that I wrote today's cryptic crossword. 141 00:06:28,270 --> 00:06:30,630 Ah, now we're talking. We can have a look at it. 142 00:06:30,630 --> 00:06:32,230 Oh, well done. Nice. 143 00:06:32,230 --> 00:06:34,070 APPLAUSE 144 00:06:35,390 --> 00:06:37,390 I've filled in some of the answers for you. 145 00:06:37,390 --> 00:06:39,750 The other thing you can do with cryptic crosswords, 146 00:06:39,750 --> 00:06:41,550 you can hide hidden messages within them 147 00:06:41,550 --> 00:06:43,430 if you get the right combination of words. 148 00:06:43,430 --> 00:06:46,710 As you can see, if you look at the G of ghettoes on the left there 149 00:06:46,710 --> 00:06:48,430 and read down the unchecked letters, 150 00:06:48,430 --> 00:06:49,910 you'll see I've put you in the crossword. 151 00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:51,950 "Greg," nice! Oh! 152 00:06:51,950 --> 00:06:54,430 And if you also read the rest of the hidden message... 153 00:06:54,430 --> 00:06:57,590 "Greg, please give Steve... 154 00:07:00,270 --> 00:07:02,070 "..all five points." 155 00:07:02,070 --> 00:07:03,990 APPLAUSE 156 00:07:06,310 --> 00:07:10,030 Steve, the only problem for me now is how to reward you suitably 157 00:07:10,030 --> 00:07:11,750 and to punish these four. 158 00:07:13,230 --> 00:07:16,110 I am points-hungry tonight, Greg. My God. 159 00:07:16,110 --> 00:07:19,830 If you want to shift the four across, the three across, 160 00:07:19,830 --> 00:07:23,510 the two across, I'll take 'em all, cos that took ages. 161 00:07:28,670 --> 00:07:30,390 Shall I give some points out? Yes, please. 162 00:07:30,390 --> 00:07:31,710 Um, obviously... 163 00:07:35,230 --> 00:07:38,110 I find it very difficult to be mean to you, Nick. Aw. 164 00:07:38,110 --> 00:07:41,030 One point. Thank you. 165 00:07:41,030 --> 00:07:42,310 I'm sorry, John, I just... 166 00:07:42,310 --> 00:07:45,350 I'm not excited by memes, and I have a reputation. 167 00:07:45,350 --> 00:07:48,710 I'm an ex-teacher who despises children, so two points to John. 168 00:07:48,710 --> 00:07:51,670 OK. The inflatable ball, three points, 169 00:07:51,670 --> 00:07:55,470 just because I want to push Sophie Willan down a hill. 170 00:07:55,470 --> 00:07:58,150 Uh, I'll give the sarcophagus four points. Thank you. 171 00:07:58,150 --> 00:08:00,510 And it feels like you've been robbed in many ways 172 00:08:00,510 --> 00:08:02,910 that you don't get more than five points, but that's, 173 00:08:02,910 --> 00:08:05,830 that's the prize section, or as I call it... 174 00:08:05,830 --> 00:08:08,110 ..Greg's Gift Section. 175 00:08:10,910 --> 00:08:12,430 Five points to Steve. 176 00:08:12,430 --> 00:08:14,390 APPLAUSE 177 00:08:14,390 --> 00:08:15,910 Right, on we go. 178 00:08:15,910 --> 00:08:19,270 OK, and the first task involves a choose Mr Mohammed basket. 179 00:08:20,590 --> 00:08:23,030 I'm so sorry, no, I mean a picnic hamper. 180 00:08:23,030 --> 00:08:25,790 GREG GROANS, DELAYED LAUGHTER 181 00:08:41,350 --> 00:08:42,550 Pleasure to see you. 182 00:08:42,550 --> 00:08:44,870 John Robins. Alex Horne. 183 00:08:44,870 --> 00:08:47,870 Basket. Wheel. Chair. 184 00:08:47,870 --> 00:08:51,270 A lovely label here, it says, "To John, from Nick." 185 00:08:52,590 --> 00:08:54,910 "To Nick from Sophie." 186 00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:57,230 We're not going on a picnic, are we? 187 00:08:57,230 --> 00:08:58,630 Couldn't think of anything worse. 188 00:09:00,910 --> 00:09:04,670 "Make a bespoke personal hamper for Steve Pemberton." 189 00:09:04,670 --> 00:09:08,270 "Make a bespoke personal hamper for Sophie Willan." 190 00:09:08,270 --> 00:09:09,350 "..for Nick Mohammed." 191 00:09:09,350 --> 00:09:10,510 "..for John Robins." 192 00:09:10,510 --> 00:09:11,990 "..for Joanne McNally. 193 00:09:11,990 --> 00:09:16,390 "You have ten minutes. Your time starts now." 194 00:09:16,390 --> 00:09:19,390 Sophie, you do have to also spin this wheel. One big spin. 195 00:09:24,910 --> 00:09:27,230 Something from nature... Mm-hm. 196 00:09:27,230 --> 00:09:29,470 ..for Nick to suit his personality. 197 00:09:31,470 --> 00:09:33,070 Oh! Action. 198 00:09:33,070 --> 00:09:35,510 My theme is picnic. Lovely. 199 00:09:35,510 --> 00:09:38,430 Oh, yeah, perfect. It's got to all be red. 200 00:09:38,430 --> 00:09:42,270 I've got to get a hamper full of red items, I would imagine. Yes. 201 00:09:42,270 --> 00:09:44,270 He's older, isn't he? Older than...? 202 00:09:44,270 --> 00:09:46,150 Anyone else. 203 00:09:46,150 --> 00:09:48,470 So I just want to remind him of that. Ah. 204 00:09:48,470 --> 00:09:50,270 Cos soon he will be dead. 205 00:09:52,390 --> 00:09:56,270 I got some hot sauce, cos she's quite a spicy character. 206 00:09:56,270 --> 00:09:59,710 Sunflower to match his sunny disposition. Lovely. 207 00:09:59,710 --> 00:10:02,310 Right, there is a new bag in this, so... Lucky John. 208 00:10:02,310 --> 00:10:03,630 Lucky John, eh? 209 00:10:03,630 --> 00:10:05,230 HE GROANS 210 00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:06,670 There you go. 211 00:10:06,670 --> 00:10:07,910 Dog walking lead. 212 00:10:09,790 --> 00:10:12,590 All the red marbles out of the big marble thing. 213 00:10:12,590 --> 00:10:14,870 Oh, can I spin again? I want to mix it up a bit. 214 00:10:16,110 --> 00:10:18,950 Picnic! Well, we've got the hamper, haven't we? So that's good. 215 00:10:18,950 --> 00:10:20,950 And this for him in the bath, cos when you're old, 216 00:10:20,950 --> 00:10:22,430 you have to be careful in the bath. 217 00:10:22,430 --> 00:10:23,950 Pudding. Bungee cord. 218 00:10:23,950 --> 00:10:27,110 Flowers. Obviously paper plates. Obviously. 219 00:10:27,110 --> 00:10:29,510 A train. Pineapple for afters. 220 00:10:29,510 --> 00:10:31,030 Juice. 221 00:10:31,030 --> 00:10:32,750 Plain flour? Plain flour, yes. 222 00:10:32,750 --> 00:10:35,030 What's he going to do with that? Baking. Baking. 223 00:10:37,630 --> 00:10:39,630 I'm just going to attach the G clamp. 224 00:10:39,630 --> 00:10:41,910 Little bit of red carpet. 225 00:10:41,910 --> 00:10:43,550 I think this'll do, because this, 226 00:10:43,550 --> 00:10:46,550 it's both a picnic blanket and a blanket. Right. 227 00:10:46,550 --> 00:10:48,590 This cos I know he likes weird shit, 228 00:10:48,590 --> 00:10:51,270 and these to keep his sugar levels up. 229 00:10:51,270 --> 00:10:54,070 And I'm going to play a little joke on her, 230 00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:56,110 so when she opens it, she gets a nice surprise 231 00:10:56,110 --> 00:10:57,950 and she'll think of me and she'll thank me. 232 00:11:00,230 --> 00:11:03,230 Love it. Can't believe you got it all in. I know! 233 00:11:03,230 --> 00:11:05,510 WHISTLE BLOWS Perfect. 234 00:11:08,470 --> 00:11:09,990 Well, I suppose I should give you the right 235 00:11:09,990 --> 00:11:13,350 to reply about having a hamper filled with things 236 00:11:13,350 --> 00:11:15,270 that suggest you're teetering on the edge of death. 237 00:11:15,270 --> 00:11:17,630 Yeah. And into weird shit. Sorry, Steve. 238 00:11:17,630 --> 00:11:20,110 You're suggesting that Steve needs an assisted bath. 239 00:11:22,350 --> 00:11:25,030 I mean, he's a man in his 50s. 240 00:11:25,030 --> 00:11:27,390 I don't know why I thought you were older than you are. 241 00:11:27,390 --> 00:11:28,950 I don't know why. Oh, God. 242 00:11:28,950 --> 00:11:31,590 AUDIENCE MEMBER EXCLAIMS Sorry! 243 00:11:31,590 --> 00:11:34,070 For what it's worth, I was very happy with what you put. 244 00:11:34,070 --> 00:11:36,550 Including litter pickers cos old people like picking up litter. 245 00:11:36,550 --> 00:11:39,270 LAUGHTER 246 00:11:39,270 --> 00:11:41,630 Well, look I'm excited, let's crack on. 247 00:11:41,630 --> 00:11:43,190 OK, so we're going to come back to that one later on, 248 00:11:43,190 --> 00:11:45,990 so for now, here is another introduction video. 249 00:11:58,950 --> 00:12:00,390 There he is. 250 00:12:02,190 --> 00:12:03,470 Hi, Steve. Hi. 251 00:12:05,190 --> 00:12:06,390 Hello. Hello. 252 00:12:06,390 --> 00:12:10,110 One, two, three, four... 253 00:12:10,110 --> 00:12:11,750 ..five, six, seven, eight? 254 00:12:11,750 --> 00:12:13,510 Lovely. Right. Oh, God. Yeah. 255 00:12:15,150 --> 00:12:16,790 One, two, three, four... 256 00:12:18,110 --> 00:12:19,830 Paper. OK. 257 00:12:19,830 --> 00:12:22,550 Sorry, that's a rock, actually. 258 00:12:22,550 --> 00:12:24,230 ..five, six, seven, eight. 259 00:12:24,230 --> 00:12:26,510 One, two, three, four... 260 00:12:26,510 --> 00:12:27,990 ..once I saw a fish alive. 261 00:12:31,390 --> 00:12:34,230 One, two, three, four... 262 00:12:34,230 --> 00:12:36,950 ..I declare a thumb war. Ah. 263 00:12:39,590 --> 00:12:44,390 Oh, God. Oh, why? That's... Ah! That makes sense. 264 00:12:44,390 --> 00:12:47,590 "Have the most exciting thumb war with Alex." 265 00:12:50,030 --> 00:12:52,390 You have 20 minutes. Your time starts now. 266 00:12:52,390 --> 00:12:53,470 Mm. 267 00:12:53,470 --> 00:12:54,710 Tequila? 268 00:12:54,710 --> 00:12:57,390 One, two, three, four. I declare a thumb war. 269 00:12:57,390 --> 00:12:59,070 Five, six, seven, eight. 270 00:12:59,070 --> 00:13:01,830 Who do you appreciate? 271 00:13:01,830 --> 00:13:03,110 Can we get some tequila? 272 00:13:05,590 --> 00:13:07,910 Do you want me to get the tequila? Yeah. Ah. 273 00:13:07,910 --> 00:13:09,910 And shots. Come on, a bit of craic. 274 00:13:09,910 --> 00:13:11,470 You haven't had a drop since I met you. 275 00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:19,270 How many of you knew what a thumb war was? 276 00:13:19,270 --> 00:13:23,150 Did you? Cos I... I thought, from the VT, it looked like John was 277 00:13:23,150 --> 00:13:25,790 the only one who'd heard of a thumb war. 278 00:13:25,790 --> 00:13:28,790 I just forgot the intro. Yes, well, your mind was full 279 00:13:28,790 --> 00:13:30,390 of how quickly you can get hammered. 280 00:13:33,310 --> 00:13:34,510 Yeah. 281 00:13:36,510 --> 00:13:39,950 Straight to a national stereotype. "Let's get hammered." 282 00:13:39,950 --> 00:13:41,550 There's no smoke without fire. What can I say? 283 00:13:41,550 --> 00:13:44,110 Yeah. Did you come out dressed as a leprechaun as well? 284 00:13:44,110 --> 00:13:45,270 Too far. Oh, too... 285 00:13:48,310 --> 00:13:50,310 Let's watch some people doing a thumb war, 286 00:13:50,310 --> 00:13:53,510 and presumably Joanne getting hammered. 287 00:13:53,510 --> 00:13:56,270 Well, first up it's Thumb-phie Willan and Knuckle Mohammed. 288 00:13:56,270 --> 00:13:57,510 Here we go. 289 00:14:21,750 --> 00:14:24,790 I've lost you a bit. Oh, you've lost me a bit? Hang on. I'm here. 290 00:14:27,230 --> 00:14:28,990 STEADY BEAT PLAYS 291 00:14:42,190 --> 00:14:48,590 One, two, three, four, I declare a thumb war. 292 00:14:53,190 --> 00:14:55,190 Oh, that was too easy, actually... 293 00:14:55,190 --> 00:14:57,510 No, get off. It's stuck. 294 00:14:57,510 --> 00:14:58,590 Yeah. I'm done. 295 00:14:59,630 --> 00:15:02,510 NICK PLAYS NOTES 296 00:15:15,390 --> 00:15:17,150 Declare a thumb war. 297 00:15:22,630 --> 00:15:24,510 Oh, didn't go far, did it? 298 00:15:24,510 --> 00:15:26,350 Cheers, Alex. Well played. 299 00:15:26,350 --> 00:15:29,470 APPLAUSE 300 00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:31,990 I really liked it, Nick. Oh, really? Uh, and... 301 00:15:31,990 --> 00:15:34,350 You know, I've made it very clear during this series I don't like 302 00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:36,630 a pun, but I didn't mind Thumbley Stadium. Yeah. 303 00:15:38,150 --> 00:15:40,670 Nick is really good at thumb wars. Yeah. 304 00:15:40,670 --> 00:15:41,990 And by stark contrast... 305 00:15:43,430 --> 00:15:45,430 I thought we were creating high-end art here. 306 00:15:45,430 --> 00:15:48,910 Right, with the guy with the pigeon on his head? 307 00:15:48,910 --> 00:15:51,510 I was disappointed with the thumb war cos you're very quick. 308 00:15:51,510 --> 00:15:56,430 I mean the thumb war itself was, uh, shit. But... 309 00:15:56,430 --> 00:15:59,670 I've got tiny hands, though, I mean, I've got the hands of 310 00:15:59,670 --> 00:16:02,670 sort of somewhere between an old man and a baby. Yeah. 311 00:16:02,670 --> 00:16:04,470 They're very small and weird. 312 00:16:04,470 --> 00:16:06,270 Well done with Thumbley Stadium, Nick. 313 00:16:06,270 --> 00:16:07,990 LAUGHTER 314 00:16:07,990 --> 00:16:10,350 Thanks, Greg. Well done. Thank you. It's good, says a lot that 315 00:16:10,350 --> 00:16:13,550 so far, Thumbley Stadium is my favourite part of this task. 316 00:16:13,550 --> 00:16:15,150 Time for an advert break now, 317 00:16:15,150 --> 00:16:17,110 and if you don't want to watch them, try my method. 318 00:16:17,110 --> 00:16:19,110 I force someone from the company who make the product 319 00:16:19,110 --> 00:16:20,430 to watch them for me. 320 00:16:20,430 --> 00:16:22,790 Well, they've got us scanning our own shopping, haven't they? 321 00:16:22,790 --> 00:16:27,150 See how you like it, you profit-motivated barrel of rats. 322 00:16:27,150 --> 00:16:28,030 See you in a minute. 323 00:16:36,632 --> 00:16:39,192 APPLAUSE 324 00:16:39,192 --> 00:16:43,072 Hello! Welcome back to part two of Taskmaster. 325 00:16:43,072 --> 00:16:46,192 We're in the midst of some pretty exciting thumb wars. 326 00:16:46,192 --> 00:16:47,792 Oh, yeah, well, the funny thing is, 327 00:16:47,792 --> 00:16:49,432 this task, it just came to me one day, 328 00:16:49,432 --> 00:16:50,632 and I wasn't really sure about it, 329 00:16:50,632 --> 00:16:53,232 but now I feel so fortunate that it turned out this way 330 00:16:53,232 --> 00:16:57,072 and gave the comedians a chance to really shine, and that, Greg... 331 00:16:57,072 --> 00:16:58,392 ..was a thumble brag, 332 00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:01,672 Now for the attempts... AUDIENCE GROANS 333 00:17:01,672 --> 00:17:03,352 ..of John and Joanne. 334 00:17:14,352 --> 00:17:17,272 Hello. Hello, Alex. Hello, John. 335 00:17:24,312 --> 00:17:27,032 Basically, there's three condiments. 336 00:17:27,032 --> 00:17:30,512 There's mustard, custard, and peri peri sauce. Mm-hm. 337 00:17:30,512 --> 00:17:33,672 You've got a spit bucket here. A shot of rum here. 338 00:17:33,672 --> 00:17:38,352 The game is - you keep one thumb clean for the whole game, 339 00:17:38,352 --> 00:17:42,112 and if you sully that thumb, you're out. Ah. 340 00:17:42,112 --> 00:17:45,752 So you dip all nine other fingers into the condiment, 341 00:17:45,752 --> 00:17:47,072 suck it off. 342 00:17:47,072 --> 00:17:49,872 All nine into the next condiment... BOTH: ..suck it off. 343 00:17:49,872 --> 00:17:54,272 Then the last clean thumb - you dip it in the mustard, custard, 344 00:17:54,272 --> 00:17:56,552 and stick it to the other person's head. OK. 345 00:17:57,392 --> 00:17:59,472 "Win the thumb war. 346 00:17:59,472 --> 00:18:02,752 "You may not cross the lines of fire. 347 00:18:02,752 --> 00:18:04,832 "Last thumb standing wins. 348 00:18:04,832 --> 00:18:07,152 "From this moment onwards, you may only communicate using 349 00:18:07,152 --> 00:18:08,432 "Queen song titles." 350 00:18:09,512 --> 00:18:11,152 Don't Stop Me Now. 351 00:18:22,992 --> 00:18:25,672 Fee-fi-fo-thumb... Go! 352 00:18:28,152 --> 00:18:29,792 OK. Hmm... 353 00:18:29,792 --> 00:18:31,112 Oh, qui... Oh, no. 354 00:18:31,112 --> 00:18:32,392 Sick. Oh, really? 355 00:18:33,832 --> 00:18:36,432 Action This Day. WHISTLE BLOWS 356 00:18:41,432 --> 00:18:44,712 Ooh! Fat Bottomed Girl. 357 00:18:44,712 --> 00:18:46,312 The Miracle. 358 00:18:48,192 --> 00:18:50,112 Urgh! 359 00:18:53,672 --> 00:18:58,552 What the fuck is that? I forgot to keep that clean! Me too. Ah! 360 00:19:00,512 --> 00:19:02,432 LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE 361 00:19:04,512 --> 00:19:05,752 That's how you do it, baby. 362 00:19:10,952 --> 00:19:13,632 Argh! 363 00:19:13,632 --> 00:19:15,192 We Are The Champions! 364 00:19:15,192 --> 00:19:17,832 APPLAUSE 365 00:19:20,112 --> 00:19:22,032 What percentage of every day are you thinking about 366 00:19:22,032 --> 00:19:23,872 the band Queen, John? 367 00:19:23,872 --> 00:19:26,752 When you're wearing a Freddie Mercury jacket, 368 00:19:26,752 --> 00:19:29,632 uh, it's on your mind. It's on your mind. 369 00:19:29,632 --> 00:19:31,592 I didn't know that many Queen songs. No. 370 00:19:31,592 --> 00:19:32,752 I looked up some afterwards. 371 00:19:32,752 --> 00:19:34,752 We could've had Flick Of The Wrist from... 372 00:19:34,752 --> 00:19:36,032 A Night At The Opera. 373 00:19:36,032 --> 00:19:38,032 No, no, no, no, no, no, no! Uh, uh, no, no, no. 374 00:19:38,032 --> 00:19:39,912 Uh-oh! Sheer Heart Attack. It is Sheer Heart Attack. 375 00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:42,192 Someone's been kicked out of the Queen fan club! 376 00:19:43,832 --> 00:19:45,712 I'm actually in the Queen fan club. 377 00:19:50,552 --> 00:19:54,192 Joanne, the thing that I found intriguing about your game is 378 00:19:54,192 --> 00:19:56,752 I felt it was a game you've played many times before. 379 00:19:58,992 --> 00:20:00,992 And Joanne had a catchphrase 380 00:20:00,992 --> 00:20:03,312 that was sandwiched between every rule. 381 00:20:03,312 --> 00:20:04,352 Suck it off. 382 00:20:10,472 --> 00:20:12,832 It was called Custard And Mustard, Oh, My. 383 00:20:12,832 --> 00:20:14,832 What were the rules? I mean, I got into it... Yeah. 384 00:20:14,832 --> 00:20:17,752 ..but I didn't know why. I just wanted shots, 385 00:20:17,752 --> 00:20:20,032 speed, custard, and then it was like, uh... 386 00:20:22,312 --> 00:20:24,552 That would be such a great T-shirt. 387 00:20:27,192 --> 00:20:29,512 It would be an amazing logo on a T-shirt, 388 00:20:29,512 --> 00:20:30,432 perhaps with one addition. 389 00:20:30,432 --> 00:20:32,752 GREG AND JOANNE: Shots, speed... Custard. 390 00:20:32,752 --> 00:20:34,192 JOANNE ON RECORDING: Suck it off. 391 00:20:37,072 --> 00:20:38,832 And for our final war of the opposables, 392 00:20:38,832 --> 00:20:40,112 it's Steve Pemberthumb. 393 00:20:40,112 --> 00:20:41,432 Oh, that's good! 394 00:21:08,152 --> 00:21:09,912 Charge! 395 00:21:09,912 --> 00:21:13,912 We have come to claim our territory. This is righty territory. 396 00:21:13,912 --> 00:21:15,152 No, it's not! 397 00:21:15,152 --> 00:21:17,152 It most certainly is. 398 00:21:17,152 --> 00:21:20,912 One, two, three, four... 399 00:21:22,392 --> 00:21:24,792 SOFTLY: ..I declare a thumb war. 400 00:21:24,792 --> 00:21:26,512 CHARGE! 401 00:21:35,512 --> 00:21:36,912 Argh! 402 00:21:38,832 --> 00:21:41,432 NO! 403 00:21:44,912 --> 00:21:49,312 What are we doing, leftie? Why are we fighting this war? 404 00:21:49,312 --> 00:21:51,632 You said it was your territory. 405 00:21:51,632 --> 00:21:56,032 We both belong together. Here, come, let me help you. 406 00:21:56,032 --> 00:21:59,712 Can you come up? Thumbs up. Thumbs up! 407 00:22:00,952 --> 00:22:03,992 I've lost a lot of good men in this war, you know. 408 00:22:03,992 --> 00:22:07,912 Pinky, Ring, Middle, Index, all gone. 409 00:22:09,712 --> 00:22:11,192 What say we go and watch the footy, eh? 410 00:22:11,192 --> 00:22:14,992 I love the footy. Let's go. Let's go, then. Come on. 411 00:22:17,672 --> 00:22:20,272 APPLAUSE 412 00:22:24,312 --> 00:22:27,632 We wanted to go for an anti-war message... Yes. 413 00:22:27,632 --> 00:22:30,392 ..and I think that came across really powerfully. 414 00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:33,952 Too many people have perished in thumb wars, Steve. 415 00:22:33,952 --> 00:22:36,232 I thought it was, uh, well-conceived... 416 00:22:38,712 --> 00:22:42,432 ..moving... Yeah, very moving. ..and, at times, exciting. 417 00:22:46,512 --> 00:22:48,872 Right, then, five contrasting thumb wars, Greg. 418 00:22:48,872 --> 00:22:51,672 We've got to take into consideration the quality of 419 00:22:51,672 --> 00:22:53,432 the thumb war. 420 00:22:53,432 --> 00:22:55,752 Why am I looking at you, Sophie? It's weird, innit? 421 00:22:55,752 --> 00:22:56,952 I think it's cos you... 422 00:22:56,952 --> 00:22:59,312 ..you're going to... give me the bottom. 423 00:23:04,032 --> 00:23:06,032 My instinct is to give you one point. 424 00:23:06,032 --> 00:23:08,352 What do you think? I think it's reasonable. Yeah. 425 00:23:08,352 --> 00:23:10,672 LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE 426 00:23:13,392 --> 00:23:15,072 I loved the production values, 427 00:23:15,072 --> 00:23:17,592 and felt the same sort of excitement level 428 00:23:17,592 --> 00:23:19,272 for Nick and John, if I'm honest, 429 00:23:19,272 --> 00:23:21,792 so I'm going to give Nick and John three points each. 430 00:23:21,792 --> 00:23:24,632 I'm going to give Joanne four, but, my God, 431 00:23:24,632 --> 00:23:29,072 how can I deny... LAUGHING: ..the beautiful tribute 432 00:23:29,072 --> 00:23:31,112 that was the Battle Of The Thumb? Five points. 433 00:23:31,112 --> 00:23:34,272 There you go. So Steve's done it again. Well done, Steve. Five points. 434 00:23:34,272 --> 00:23:36,112 I'd like to see the scores, please, Alex. 435 00:23:36,112 --> 00:23:39,992 Of course you would. Well, our habitual bottom guys - 436 00:23:39,992 --> 00:23:42,352 Nick and Sophie - are still there with four points each. 437 00:23:42,352 --> 00:23:44,832 Joanne's got eight. Steve's in the lead with ten this time. 438 00:23:44,832 --> 00:23:46,152 All right, then. 439 00:23:46,152 --> 00:23:49,592 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 440 00:23:49,592 --> 00:23:51,912 Right, let's have another. 441 00:23:51,912 --> 00:23:54,592 This one has that familiar mix of darts and drinks 442 00:23:54,592 --> 00:23:56,032 and awkward positions. 443 00:24:10,552 --> 00:24:13,712 Hello, team. Hello, Alex. Hiya. 444 00:24:13,712 --> 00:24:16,352 One on the doormat, one in the doorway, please. 445 00:24:16,352 --> 00:24:18,272 One on the doormat, one in the doorway? 446 00:24:18,272 --> 00:24:19,392 OK, I'll go doorway. 447 00:24:19,392 --> 00:24:20,592 I'll go doormat. 448 00:24:20,592 --> 00:24:23,112 Uh-oh. Hi. 449 00:24:23,112 --> 00:24:24,592 Shall I go mat, do you want to go in the dome? 450 00:24:24,592 --> 00:24:26,112 You go in the dome there. 451 00:24:26,112 --> 00:24:28,472 I was on the college darts team, I'll just tell you that. 452 00:24:28,472 --> 00:24:29,352 Were you? Yeah. 453 00:24:29,352 --> 00:24:32,232 OK, go on, you go in there. You go there. Oh, I see. Right. 454 00:24:32,232 --> 00:24:34,832 You've made your beds. Yeah. Oh, all right, here we go. Oh, no. 455 00:24:34,832 --> 00:24:37,192 Do you want to read it? Whose is that? That's not... 456 00:24:37,192 --> 00:24:38,872 That's part of the task. 457 00:24:38,872 --> 00:24:42,552 Right. Part of the task. I thought someone had just left it. Right. 458 00:24:42,552 --> 00:24:46,312 OK, so it says, "Make the most moves on the movement circles. 459 00:24:46,312 --> 00:24:48,312 "Your team-mate must flip a bottle 460 00:24:48,312 --> 00:24:51,032 "then throw a dart at each dartboard to create a move." 461 00:24:55,072 --> 00:24:59,632 "If they get a bull's-eye, you have free choice. 462 00:24:59,632 --> 00:25:02,672 "Also, if they successfully land the bottle flip, 463 00:25:02,672 --> 00:25:07,432 "your team-mate may place a dart anywhere in the dartboard." 464 00:25:07,432 --> 00:25:09,792 "Also, if they successfully land the bottle flip, 465 00:25:09,792 --> 00:25:13,272 "your team-mate may place a dart anywhere in the dartboard." 466 00:25:13,272 --> 00:25:15,672 And is it a bull's-eye on either of the dartboards? 467 00:25:15,672 --> 00:25:18,032 Yeah, so a bull's-eye on that one would give free choice of part of 468 00:25:18,032 --> 00:25:19,912 the body. Yeah. Bull's-eye on that one, free choice of colour. 469 00:25:19,912 --> 00:25:21,592 OK, that makes sense. 470 00:25:21,592 --> 00:25:26,232 "Longest movement sequence successfully made wins." 471 00:25:26,232 --> 00:25:28,112 So Sophie's on bottle flip. 472 00:25:28,112 --> 00:25:31,432 Right. John's on darts. Joanne's on movement. 473 00:25:31,432 --> 00:25:33,792 Do I need to know anything, Steve, in terms of like, 474 00:25:33,792 --> 00:25:36,872 uh, like, dodgy knees or anything that you, uh...? 475 00:25:36,872 --> 00:25:38,712 Just dodgy body. Dodgy bum, dodgy... Yeah. 476 00:25:40,312 --> 00:25:43,672 OK, everyone understand? No. Yeah. Let's go. Yeah. 477 00:25:43,672 --> 00:25:47,032 Oh, hang on, the darts captain has taken his jacket off. 478 00:25:47,032 --> 00:25:48,672 Can I...? Are we filming? 479 00:25:48,672 --> 00:25:50,272 We're filming. 480 00:25:50,272 --> 00:25:51,512 Sex sells, John. 481 00:25:54,072 --> 00:25:56,072 APPLAUSE 482 00:25:59,312 --> 00:26:01,912 On the college darts team, were we? 483 00:26:01,912 --> 00:26:03,312 I was captain of the... 484 00:26:03,312 --> 00:26:05,752 Jesus Christ, the heat is on. 485 00:26:05,752 --> 00:26:09,072 Especially a man who's stripped down to a vest. 486 00:26:09,072 --> 00:26:10,872 LAUGHTER 487 00:26:10,872 --> 00:26:13,912 Steve, are you getting sick of the age-related slams yet? 488 00:26:13,912 --> 00:26:16,192 Your team-mate asking if you had any ailments. 489 00:26:17,952 --> 00:26:19,352 I think Nick was looking out for me. 490 00:26:19,352 --> 00:26:21,112 It was just common courtesy, that was, really. 491 00:26:21,112 --> 00:26:22,392 Oh, OK, you'd have asked anyone that. 492 00:26:22,392 --> 00:26:24,192 I would've asked absolutely anyone that. 493 00:26:24,192 --> 00:26:26,592 Yeah. Not just Grandpa. 494 00:26:26,592 --> 00:26:28,112 Let's crack on. 495 00:26:28,112 --> 00:26:31,752 Right, it's the team of two up first, as Nick steps up to the oche 496 00:26:31,752 --> 00:26:34,032 to influence Steve's dodgy body. Here we go. 497 00:26:35,752 --> 00:26:39,712 Here we go, and... Right. Pathetic. Unsuccessful. 498 00:26:39,712 --> 00:26:41,472 So, uh, I'll try and throw a bull's-eye. 499 00:26:41,472 --> 00:26:43,792 OK, no, it's bum, so that's good. Right, bum, good start. 500 00:26:43,792 --> 00:26:46,312 Um, uh... Ooh, right on the line. 501 00:26:46,312 --> 00:26:47,672 Brown bum or pink bum? 502 00:26:47,672 --> 00:26:49,952 No, that is bum in the pink. Bum in the pink. 503 00:26:51,232 --> 00:26:53,512 There you go. So that's one move completed. 504 00:26:54,992 --> 00:26:57,392 I think I'm doing it too high in the air. 505 00:26:57,392 --> 00:26:58,952 Right, left foot... 506 00:27:00,352 --> 00:27:01,832 ..yellow. Left foot, yellow. 507 00:27:01,832 --> 00:27:04,232 Basically on it. Great. Fine. Here we go. 508 00:27:04,232 --> 00:27:06,752 Two moves completed. Oh, every time. 509 00:27:06,752 --> 00:27:08,312 Ooh, we have a left hand. 510 00:27:08,312 --> 00:27:10,992 Left hand. Left hand. White'd be good. 511 00:27:12,352 --> 00:27:15,192 There you go. It is white. Left hand, white. Ah! 512 00:27:15,192 --> 00:27:17,152 Three movements. OK. Right elbow. 513 00:27:17,152 --> 00:27:18,672 Right elbow's in play. OK. 514 00:27:20,152 --> 00:27:21,832 Oh, it's white. White. 515 00:27:21,832 --> 00:27:23,392 There is a white back there. 516 00:27:23,392 --> 00:27:25,672 Yeah, there you go! Five movements complete. 517 00:27:30,792 --> 00:27:32,472 Right elbow in the end. Oh, right elbow. 518 00:27:32,472 --> 00:27:34,912 Right. So that's already in play. 519 00:27:34,912 --> 00:27:37,792 Oh, I see. What would you prefer? To keep it where it is? 520 00:27:37,792 --> 00:27:41,072 Oh, yeah. Quite comfortable here. 521 00:27:41,072 --> 00:27:42,552 It's black and that's in the middle. 522 00:27:42,552 --> 00:27:45,552 STEVE SNIGGERS Right. 523 00:27:45,552 --> 00:27:47,032 That hand must stay on there. 524 00:27:47,032 --> 00:27:48,192 Yeah, I know! 525 00:27:49,512 --> 00:27:52,072 How can I get that to there? I think we'll count any... 526 00:27:52,072 --> 00:27:54,352 If any of your bum is on pink, that'll be fine. 527 00:27:56,472 --> 00:27:58,752 Is that...? Yeah, that counts. Here we go again. 528 00:28:00,072 --> 00:28:02,952 That is dreadful. Oh, my God, Steve. 529 00:28:02,952 --> 00:28:04,312 Right, it's over. 530 00:28:06,312 --> 00:28:08,192 APPLAUSE 531 00:28:10,992 --> 00:28:13,912 Nick, it feels rude of me to say that I just had 532 00:28:13,912 --> 00:28:16,472 a gut instinct you'd be no good at darts. Oh! 533 00:28:19,312 --> 00:28:21,872 I still think, though, we had got it the right way round. 534 00:28:21,872 --> 00:28:23,272 I think in hindsight, if we'd have done it the... 535 00:28:23,272 --> 00:28:24,672 You think the RIGHT way round? Yeah. 536 00:28:26,552 --> 00:28:29,272 Of course. How were you going to get from brown to pink to yellow? 537 00:28:29,272 --> 00:28:31,632 You'd have to sort of... In my cape. 538 00:28:31,632 --> 00:28:32,832 Oh, of course. Oh, yeah. 539 00:28:32,832 --> 00:28:34,872 Oh, you'd have bounced around nicely, wouldn't you? Yeah, I would've. 540 00:28:34,872 --> 00:28:37,152 But it was nice for Steve to be able to have a nap, so... Yeah. 541 00:28:38,672 --> 00:28:41,992 Cos I'm quite flexible, and because I'm quite small as well 542 00:28:41,992 --> 00:28:44,352 I don't know if that's... Maybe that's not helpful. 543 00:28:44,352 --> 00:28:45,992 I don't think that's an advantage. No, it's not an advantage. Ever. 544 00:28:45,992 --> 00:28:47,152 You're not small! 545 00:28:49,032 --> 00:28:50,592 Sorry. I didn't even hear what you said. 546 00:28:50,592 --> 00:28:52,632 Oh, good! It's a compliment. 547 00:28:52,632 --> 00:28:53,872 OK, break time. 548 00:28:53,872 --> 00:28:55,832 A lot of students get in touch with me and they say, 549 00:28:55,832 --> 00:28:58,192 "What do you and Alex get up to during the breaks?" 550 00:28:58,192 --> 00:29:00,152 Well, I'll tell you, my young friends. 551 00:29:00,152 --> 00:29:02,872 He buffs my gusset. 552 00:29:04,992 --> 00:29:07,272 See you soon. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 553 00:29:14,152 --> 00:29:16,432 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 554 00:29:16,432 --> 00:29:18,072 Hello! And a warm welcome back 555 00:29:18,072 --> 00:29:21,432 to the third part of this Taskmaster festival. 556 00:29:21,432 --> 00:29:24,752 Hey, guys, it's great to see so many familiar faces out there. 557 00:29:24,752 --> 00:29:26,432 Before the break, we saw the teams taking part 558 00:29:26,432 --> 00:29:28,752 in a task which feels like a game that already exists, 559 00:29:28,752 --> 00:29:30,432 but it definitely doesn't. 560 00:29:30,432 --> 00:29:32,792 It's the team of three's turn now, with Joanne in the dome, 561 00:29:32,792 --> 00:29:35,152 John at the oche, and BAFTA award-winning comedian 562 00:29:35,152 --> 00:29:37,152 and writer Sophie Willan standing at the side 563 00:29:37,152 --> 00:29:39,872 tossing a bottle about a bit. Here we go. 564 00:29:39,872 --> 00:29:42,552 I'm actually quite nimble. This is good. OK, yeah. 565 00:29:42,552 --> 00:29:44,392 And how are you at bottle flipping, Sophie? 566 00:29:44,392 --> 00:29:46,712 Well, we'll find out. OK, well, you may flip. 567 00:29:46,712 --> 00:29:47,832 Right. 568 00:29:49,512 --> 00:29:51,152 Off you go, John. Ready? Yeah. 569 00:29:52,312 --> 00:29:53,712 Oh, nice. Left hand. 570 00:29:55,112 --> 00:29:56,872 Brown. 571 00:29:56,872 --> 00:29:58,832 Smashed it. 572 00:29:58,832 --> 00:30:00,152 Well... 573 00:30:00,152 --> 00:30:02,792 Yeah, that's not a successful bottle flip. 574 00:30:02,792 --> 00:30:04,632 Close. Left elbow. 575 00:30:04,632 --> 00:30:06,952 Uh-oh. OK, so we need pink or brown. 576 00:30:08,912 --> 00:30:11,192 Oh, well done. Pink. Left elbow, pink. Yeah. 577 00:30:14,672 --> 00:30:17,552 Right. So we ideally want bum, white. 578 00:30:17,552 --> 00:30:19,312 Bum, white. 579 00:30:19,312 --> 00:30:20,712 Bum. 580 00:30:20,712 --> 00:30:23,432 That is... Oh, that is bum white! Oh! 581 00:30:23,432 --> 00:30:24,632 That is, well done. 582 00:30:26,672 --> 00:30:28,552 It'd be lovely if it lands on that table. 583 00:30:28,552 --> 00:30:30,392 It's left hand, white. 584 00:30:31,472 --> 00:30:33,432 This is actually the hardest bit. Yeah. 585 00:30:36,912 --> 00:30:41,232 Left elbow, pink. Ass, black. Left hand, yellow. 586 00:30:49,952 --> 00:30:52,272 YES! Oh! What have we got now? 587 00:30:52,272 --> 00:30:53,672 Sophie can choose what Joanne does. 588 00:30:53,672 --> 00:30:55,992 Right hand, brown, Sophie. 589 00:30:55,992 --> 00:30:59,032 Right hand, brown, please. OK. 590 00:30:59,032 --> 00:31:00,712 That's the bull's-eye. 591 00:31:00,712 --> 00:31:02,152 It's bull's-eye. What do you want to move? 592 00:31:02,152 --> 00:31:04,872 My right knee, please. Right knee. Black, please. Black. 593 00:31:06,552 --> 00:31:07,632 It's black. 594 00:31:10,152 --> 00:31:11,432 That's bull's-eye. 595 00:31:12,712 --> 00:31:14,432 That's the bull's-eye. You've got a bull's-eye. 596 00:31:14,432 --> 00:31:15,632 That's bull's-eye. 597 00:31:15,632 --> 00:31:16,792 It's bull's-eye again. 598 00:31:16,792 --> 00:31:18,552 Bull's-eye. Bull's-eye. 599 00:31:21,312 --> 00:31:22,952 How long left? 600 00:31:22,952 --> 00:31:24,392 I think infinity. 601 00:31:24,392 --> 00:31:25,872 It's most moves. 602 00:31:25,872 --> 00:31:28,752 I'm going to try for the right foot. 603 00:31:28,752 --> 00:31:30,072 And is. Right foot. 604 00:31:30,072 --> 00:31:32,352 So right foot, we want brown or pink. 605 00:31:33,592 --> 00:31:37,552 Brown. So your right foot... Yeah. OK. 606 00:31:37,552 --> 00:31:40,072 Uh, we need a knee on black please, unfortunately, in there. 607 00:31:40,072 --> 00:31:41,152 Oh, no. Oh, shit. 608 00:31:41,152 --> 00:31:42,672 Bit of a problem here. That might not be possible. 609 00:31:42,672 --> 00:31:44,472 That is the end of your first movement. 610 00:31:44,472 --> 00:31:46,272 Now if you all switch round one place. 611 00:31:46,272 --> 00:31:47,872 What, that's the first part? 612 00:31:47,872 --> 00:31:49,072 No, I'm only joking. 613 00:31:50,152 --> 00:31:51,592 APPLAUSE 614 00:31:54,072 --> 00:31:56,752 The bottle was a bit of a set-up really, wasn't it? 615 00:31:56,752 --> 00:31:58,712 It's just to make you look like a prick. Yeah. 616 00:32:00,072 --> 00:32:02,832 Yeah, he knows what he's doing. If you can't throw a bottle. 617 00:32:02,832 --> 00:32:04,152 Yeah, but it's very hard. 618 00:32:04,152 --> 00:32:05,752 You did pick your positions. 619 00:32:05,752 --> 00:32:08,032 I was forced into mine by the darts champion. 620 00:32:09,312 --> 00:32:11,832 That is true. I mean, fair play, he's good at darts. 621 00:32:11,832 --> 00:32:14,192 Yeah. He's good at darts. Genuinely impressive, wasn't it? 622 00:32:14,192 --> 00:32:16,912 Yeah. I'm not sure we got to test how nimble you were. 623 00:32:16,912 --> 00:32:18,552 Um, in fairness... 624 00:32:18,552 --> 00:32:21,032 So how many moves? Like, I was in that dome for a good... 625 00:32:21,032 --> 00:32:22,712 JOHN: Hour. ..hour. 626 00:32:22,712 --> 00:32:25,112 So how many different moves did they manage to do? 627 00:32:25,112 --> 00:32:26,872 A total of 43. 628 00:32:26,872 --> 00:32:29,392 Wow! APPLAUSE 629 00:32:29,392 --> 00:32:32,272 So five points to the team of three. 630 00:32:32,272 --> 00:32:34,592 And what shall I give these poor fuckers? 631 00:32:34,592 --> 00:32:35,952 The old man and the little boy. 632 00:32:37,312 --> 00:32:38,592 Five? 633 00:32:41,672 --> 00:32:42,832 It's a thought. 634 00:32:44,112 --> 00:32:46,752 Two points - let's call it charity. Five and two. 635 00:32:46,752 --> 00:32:49,912 Well, there we go. Two points, and five points to the team of three. 636 00:32:49,912 --> 00:32:51,552 APPLAUSE 637 00:32:51,552 --> 00:32:54,472 Right, can we get going with another task, please? 638 00:32:54,472 --> 00:32:56,912 Ooh! Yes, of course, and, hey, 639 00:32:56,912 --> 00:32:59,192 remember what happened earlier on in the show? 640 00:33:11,752 --> 00:33:13,112 Hello, Alex. Hello, John. 641 00:33:15,392 --> 00:33:19,272 Right, here we are. "To Nick. From Sophie." 642 00:33:19,272 --> 00:33:20,592 Is this the hamper? 643 00:33:21,792 --> 00:33:24,152 I put one together for John, I think. 644 00:33:24,152 --> 00:33:28,752 Aw! "To Steve. From Joanne." Is this a gift? 645 00:33:28,752 --> 00:33:31,072 Do you remember making one of them? 646 00:33:31,072 --> 00:33:33,112 I don't. Nah. 647 00:33:33,112 --> 00:33:35,392 Oh, right, it's from Nick. That's handy. 648 00:33:36,392 --> 00:33:37,992 Is it...? Was it..? Is it colour...? 649 00:33:37,992 --> 00:33:39,832 Is it colour-coded for a reason? 650 00:33:39,832 --> 00:33:42,152 Red. He thinks I'm angry? 651 00:33:43,512 --> 00:33:44,992 Or sexual. 652 00:33:44,992 --> 00:33:48,752 Oh, wow. Shall I? 653 00:33:48,752 --> 00:33:52,272 "Create a picture of the person that gave you this hamper..." 654 00:33:52,272 --> 00:33:55,112 "..using the contents of this hamper." 655 00:33:55,112 --> 00:33:57,872 "Best hamper picture wins. You have 15 minutes." 656 00:33:57,872 --> 00:34:00,232 "Create a picture of the person..." So, like... 657 00:34:00,232 --> 00:34:01,752 Yeah, this is your canvas. 658 00:34:01,752 --> 00:34:04,392 Ah, OK. OK. OK. 659 00:34:04,392 --> 00:34:08,032 "You have 15 minutes. Your time starts now." Fab. 660 00:34:08,032 --> 00:34:10,592 I've already got a human head, 661 00:34:10,592 --> 00:34:13,472 which is a great start for any likeness. 662 00:34:13,472 --> 00:34:16,192 Got two trifles, a baguette. 663 00:34:16,192 --> 00:34:18,712 A lovely little red bit of carpet. 664 00:34:18,712 --> 00:34:21,592 Uh, I met Steve years ago, and I was with my grandad, 665 00:34:21,592 --> 00:34:23,952 and they actually have the same face. 666 00:34:23,952 --> 00:34:25,872 They've got the same nose. It goes up. 667 00:34:25,872 --> 00:34:27,472 I would say he's quite romantic. 668 00:34:27,472 --> 00:34:29,152 Is that because there are some roses in the hamper? 669 00:34:29,152 --> 00:34:30,672 Yeah. Yeah. 670 00:34:30,672 --> 00:34:33,592 OK, she has an hourglass figure. 671 00:34:33,592 --> 00:34:35,112 Ah! 672 00:34:35,112 --> 00:34:38,312 I think that's sort of going to be our background. Lovely. 673 00:34:38,312 --> 00:34:40,232 Well, we're going to start with his tuxedo. 674 00:34:41,832 --> 00:34:45,032 A lovely round face. 675 00:34:45,032 --> 00:34:47,792 We could always have this to prop up the head, 676 00:34:47,792 --> 00:34:52,192 because, you know, behind every head, there is a skull. 677 00:34:52,192 --> 00:34:54,752 Oh, no, do you know what? That's his tongue cos he's 678 00:34:54,752 --> 00:34:55,992 a smart guy. 679 00:34:55,992 --> 00:34:57,512 I'd say he could cut you. 680 00:34:57,512 --> 00:34:59,832 With his tongue? Yeah. 681 00:34:59,832 --> 00:35:02,112 A ski slope nose, you see? 682 00:35:02,112 --> 00:35:03,192 Oh, no. 683 00:35:03,192 --> 00:35:04,512 That's the shape of her. 684 00:35:04,512 --> 00:35:05,832 Oh, you DO know what she looks like. 685 00:35:07,632 --> 00:35:11,152 I need to make sure the face is there. 686 00:35:11,152 --> 00:35:13,072 Very important, yeah. 687 00:35:13,072 --> 00:35:14,392 She has lovely blonde hair, 688 00:35:14,392 --> 00:35:17,752 and luckily we have something roughly the right shade. 689 00:35:17,752 --> 00:35:21,752 I'm going to make his testicles the roses. 690 00:35:21,752 --> 00:35:24,072 Like, I think he's respectful in the sack. 691 00:35:24,072 --> 00:35:26,072 That's what they indicate. 692 00:35:26,072 --> 00:35:29,832 And I think it's going to have to be beans for the face. 693 00:35:29,832 --> 00:35:31,792 Oh, look, it's even sticking to the thing 694 00:35:31,792 --> 00:35:33,232 because of the banana slime. 695 00:35:33,232 --> 00:35:34,432 Just like her actual hair. 696 00:35:34,432 --> 00:35:36,712 Just like... STEVE LAUGHS 697 00:35:39,192 --> 00:35:42,912 And obviously Sophie's famously got those bright orange eyes. 698 00:35:42,912 --> 00:35:45,792 Oh, the cushion? That's again for under here. 699 00:35:45,792 --> 00:35:47,832 He's the kind of guy who'd offer a cushion if you needed 700 00:35:47,832 --> 00:35:50,952 to be on your knees around him. He's a romantic. 701 00:35:52,832 --> 00:35:57,232 I mean, it's not actually turning out to be that bad, I have to say. 702 00:35:57,232 --> 00:36:00,472 It's not actually going too badly. Right. 703 00:36:00,472 --> 00:36:02,032 It's not bad. 704 00:36:02,032 --> 00:36:03,672 I don't think that's bad. 705 00:36:03,672 --> 00:36:05,312 No, you've said that 12 times now. 706 00:36:07,352 --> 00:36:10,352 Cos I know John has a certain "je ne sais quoi." 707 00:36:10,352 --> 00:36:12,032 Exactly what these crisps are. 708 00:36:12,032 --> 00:36:14,392 I feel like Neil Buchanan, actually. 709 00:36:14,392 --> 00:36:17,552 Cos she's obviously not blue. Oh, she smells, doesn't she? 710 00:36:17,552 --> 00:36:19,872 She DOES smell, doesn't she? 711 00:36:19,872 --> 00:36:22,872 She's trying desperately to cover that bald spot up. 712 00:36:22,872 --> 00:36:24,912 I do the centre of the eye. 713 00:36:24,912 --> 00:36:27,272 Any legs for John, or not really? 714 00:36:27,272 --> 00:36:29,592 I haven't seen him walking around much, to be honest. 715 00:36:29,592 --> 00:36:31,112 A lot going on. 716 00:36:31,112 --> 00:36:32,472 Yeah, I think that's lovely. 717 00:36:33,672 --> 00:36:35,392 He shouldn't have a hat on, should he? 718 00:36:36,552 --> 00:36:37,712 I don't think. 719 00:36:39,992 --> 00:36:42,352 No. Thanks, Sophie. 720 00:36:44,032 --> 00:36:47,512 Yeah. Really good. Fabulous, thank you. 721 00:36:47,512 --> 00:36:49,472 APPLAUSE 722 00:36:51,232 --> 00:36:54,192 Yet again... I know. ..Grandad is slammed. 723 00:36:54,192 --> 00:36:56,152 Unbelievable, isn't it? It's incredible, innit? Yeah. 724 00:36:56,152 --> 00:36:58,712 And is there any truth that he looked like... He met my grandad! 725 00:36:58,712 --> 00:37:00,432 I did meet Sophie's grandad at a do. 726 00:37:00,432 --> 00:37:03,552 I do actually have the photo. Yeah. Well, then let us be the judge. 727 00:37:03,552 --> 00:37:05,152 NICK: Aw! 728 00:37:05,152 --> 00:37:07,872 You're right! They have sort of got a similar face. 729 00:37:07,872 --> 00:37:12,272 He was sloshed that night, actually. Nearly got kicked out. Did he? 730 00:37:12,272 --> 00:37:14,632 Well, he insulted Melvyn Bragg from across the room. Did he? 731 00:37:14,632 --> 00:37:17,072 LAUGHTER He just screamed at him, 732 00:37:17,072 --> 00:37:19,832 "I've got your book, I fell asleep, it was shite." 733 00:37:19,832 --> 00:37:21,792 LAUGHTER 734 00:37:21,792 --> 00:37:23,472 APPLAUSE 735 00:37:23,472 --> 00:37:24,752 It was awful! 736 00:37:26,272 --> 00:37:27,672 Right, time for the last ad break. 737 00:37:27,672 --> 00:37:30,912 And remember, one of today's prizes is an ice cube. 738 00:37:32,592 --> 00:37:34,152 We'll see you in a minute. 739 00:37:34,152 --> 00:37:35,272 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 740 00:37:39,882 --> 00:37:42,922 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 741 00:37:42,922 --> 00:37:46,042 Hello! Welcome back to Taskmaster! 742 00:37:46,042 --> 00:37:48,562 It's the final part of the show, and our contestants have had to 743 00:37:48,562 --> 00:37:51,762 make portraits of each other using the contents of a hamper. 744 00:37:51,762 --> 00:37:54,122 Yes, but have the hampers hampered them? 745 00:37:54,122 --> 00:37:57,562 Well, let's start with Steve's portrait of Joanne. 746 00:37:59,282 --> 00:38:02,522 I love it! Yeah, I'm pleased with that. 747 00:38:02,522 --> 00:38:06,082 Highlights look good. You're blow-drying your hair. 748 00:38:06,082 --> 00:38:08,402 SOPHIE: Oh, yeah. Is she? How's she...? Oh, she is! 749 00:38:08,402 --> 00:38:09,642 Yeah, she's blow-drying her hair. 750 00:38:09,642 --> 00:38:12,042 Yes. There's a lot of detail in it. I love it! 751 00:38:12,042 --> 00:38:14,402 What's going on with her top lip? Is it me? 752 00:38:14,402 --> 00:38:16,922 Yeah, she's looking in the mirror, she's, like, giving it all... 753 00:38:16,922 --> 00:38:18,282 .."Suck it off." 754 00:38:18,282 --> 00:38:20,042 LAUGHTER 755 00:38:20,042 --> 00:38:21,922 APPLAUSE 756 00:38:23,322 --> 00:38:25,322 I would say one detail you can't see there is that, 757 00:38:25,322 --> 00:38:28,082 underneath the face, there is a skull. Yeah. 758 00:38:28,082 --> 00:38:29,162 Which is quite a detail. 759 00:38:29,162 --> 00:38:31,442 That is nice, isn't it? 760 00:38:31,442 --> 00:38:32,962 Memento mori. "Remember... 761 00:38:32,962 --> 00:38:35,682 GRADUAL LAUGHTER 762 00:38:35,682 --> 00:38:38,122 "..we are all going to die." 763 00:38:38,122 --> 00:38:40,682 Yeah, and I'm not reminded enough of my own mortality, Steve, 764 00:38:40,682 --> 00:38:43,042 you're right. Well, I fucking have been tonight. Yeah. 765 00:38:43,042 --> 00:38:44,602 LAUGHTER 766 00:38:44,602 --> 00:38:46,162 APPLAUSE 767 00:38:48,242 --> 00:38:50,562 Who's next? We've seen Steve's picture of Joanne, 768 00:38:50,562 --> 00:38:51,962 now it's Joanne's picture of John. 769 00:38:54,242 --> 00:38:56,682 JOHN: I like it cos it looks like a memorial to me. 770 00:38:58,442 --> 00:39:00,722 I think it looks someone who's dropped a hamper. 771 00:39:01,762 --> 00:39:03,562 Well, it's, uh,.. 772 00:39:03,562 --> 00:39:06,082 My understanding was it was the essence of John, 773 00:39:06,082 --> 00:39:08,522 and I knew John to be a very sweet, romantic man, 774 00:39:08,522 --> 00:39:10,882 so that's kind of what I went with, and also... 775 00:39:10,882 --> 00:39:12,842 That's not what I heard in your earlier description. 776 00:39:12,842 --> 00:39:15,162 APPLAUSE 777 00:39:15,162 --> 00:39:17,482 It's a real man puts down a cushion, Greg, I can tell you. 778 00:39:20,402 --> 00:39:23,802 And roses for hands. Roses for hands! Yes. 779 00:39:23,802 --> 00:39:26,482 And testicles. LAUGHTER 780 00:39:26,482 --> 00:39:27,642 Good. Well, who's next? 781 00:39:27,642 --> 00:39:30,922 OK, so now it's John's turn. Let's see his picture of Nick. 782 00:39:30,922 --> 00:39:32,242 NICK: Oh! 783 00:39:33,802 --> 00:39:38,322 Well, I wanted to represent the magic in Nick's career, 784 00:39:38,322 --> 00:39:40,122 so he is bursting out of a bin. 785 00:39:40,122 --> 00:39:41,562 LAUGHTER 786 00:39:44,602 --> 00:39:48,322 So I used the flour to create the tuxedo, 787 00:39:48,322 --> 00:39:50,322 and his face is made of beans. 788 00:39:50,322 --> 00:39:52,362 LAUGHTER 789 00:39:52,362 --> 00:39:56,122 I love the way you've caught the thick chinstrap that Nick wears. 790 00:39:58,762 --> 00:40:00,082 Good. Who's next? 791 00:40:00,082 --> 00:40:02,762 OK, well, obviously it's now Nick's picture of Sophie. 792 00:40:04,122 --> 00:40:06,402 LAUGHTER 793 00:40:08,002 --> 00:40:09,642 I genuinely don't think that's too bad. 794 00:40:11,002 --> 00:40:12,882 He's captured an energy of sorts. 795 00:40:12,882 --> 00:40:14,682 Yeah. Baffled. 796 00:40:16,482 --> 00:40:17,722 Yeah. Yeah. 797 00:40:17,722 --> 00:40:20,162 If you imagine that face turning round to you and going, "Huh?" 798 00:40:20,162 --> 00:40:21,882 LAUGHTER 799 00:40:21,882 --> 00:40:23,162 OK. OK. 800 00:40:23,162 --> 00:40:26,002 One more. This is how Sophie Willan sees Steve Pemberton. 801 00:40:27,762 --> 00:40:30,082 LAUGHTER 802 00:40:30,082 --> 00:40:32,802 NICK: Yours is really good, Sophie. That's really good. 803 00:40:32,802 --> 00:40:34,682 APPLAUSE 804 00:40:34,682 --> 00:40:37,282 I look like a Mr Man. LAUGHTER 805 00:40:37,282 --> 00:40:39,162 I just saw it and went, "Yes." 806 00:40:41,042 --> 00:40:43,322 OK, well, here are all five of the portraits. 807 00:40:44,842 --> 00:40:47,682 Well, honestly, I don't think Joanne's necessarily captured 808 00:40:47,682 --> 00:40:49,442 the man. There was some detail in there, 809 00:40:49,442 --> 00:40:51,802 I'm going to give it two points, not one. Oh. 810 00:40:51,802 --> 00:40:54,122 Ah, thank you. I'm giving John three points. 811 00:40:54,122 --> 00:40:56,482 Then I think I'm going to give Nick 812 00:40:56,482 --> 00:40:59,242 and Steve four points, 813 00:40:59,242 --> 00:41:02,482 because I just think that Sophie... 814 00:41:02,482 --> 00:41:03,682 Yes! 815 00:41:03,682 --> 00:41:05,962 I think Sophie has captured the man, somehow. 816 00:41:07,682 --> 00:41:10,442 So that's five points to Sophie Willan! 817 00:41:10,442 --> 00:41:12,282 What are the scores? The scores... 818 00:41:12,282 --> 00:41:14,762 Well, it's very satisfying, it goes 16, 15, 14, 13, 819 00:41:14,762 --> 00:41:16,082 10 for Nick. 820 00:41:16,082 --> 00:41:18,042 LAUGHTER 821 00:41:18,042 --> 00:41:19,602 And it's Steve at the top at the moment. 822 00:41:19,602 --> 00:41:21,922 It looks like this. Let's have a look. SOPHIE: Come on! 823 00:41:21,922 --> 00:41:23,562 APPLAUSE 824 00:41:26,042 --> 00:41:27,442 Well done! 825 00:41:27,442 --> 00:41:29,802 Well, it's that time again. Please make your way 826 00:41:29,802 --> 00:41:32,122 to the stage for the final task of the show! 827 00:41:32,122 --> 00:41:33,802 APPLAUSE 828 00:41:43,002 --> 00:41:46,002 Hello, you lovely boy. Oh, thanks, Greg. 829 00:41:46,002 --> 00:41:47,922 It's a team task. I know. 830 00:41:47,922 --> 00:41:53,002 One member from each team must stand on the gold circles beneath. 831 00:41:53,002 --> 00:41:55,362 Team of two, who's going to stand on the golden circle? 832 00:41:55,362 --> 00:41:57,722 Me. Team of three, who's going to stand on the golden circle? 833 00:41:57,722 --> 00:41:59,482 I am. Ah, Joanne. 834 00:41:59,482 --> 00:42:03,002 Please, Joanne and Nick, make your way down to the golden circles. 835 00:42:03,002 --> 00:42:05,282 Not that way! Oh. No, that way... 836 00:42:05,282 --> 00:42:06,442 You, that way, yes, but not... 837 00:42:06,442 --> 00:42:09,002 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 838 00:42:11,722 --> 00:42:13,562 Who will be reading the team task out? 839 00:42:13,562 --> 00:42:16,042 I would like Sophie to read the task. 840 00:42:16,042 --> 00:42:19,242 "Completely cover your team-mate in rubber rings. 841 00:42:21,722 --> 00:42:26,522 "Catchers must face the Taskmaster at all times 842 00:42:26,522 --> 00:42:29,562 "with their hands above their head. 843 00:42:29,562 --> 00:42:32,842 "Throwers must stay behind the white line. 844 00:42:32,842 --> 00:42:35,562 "First team to completely cover their team-mate 845 00:42:35,562 --> 00:42:37,562 "in rubber rings wins." 846 00:42:37,562 --> 00:42:39,162 He'll be gone in three rings. 847 00:42:39,162 --> 00:42:41,882 LAUGHTER 848 00:42:41,882 --> 00:42:44,442 Not with my hands in the air, surely! 849 00:42:44,442 --> 00:42:47,282 I mean, Nick's a three-ring man. He's a three-ring man! 850 00:42:47,282 --> 00:42:49,802 Greg, I'm going to come down into the trough to retrieve the rings 851 00:42:49,802 --> 00:42:52,362 and fling them back, and then I'll blow the whistle and we'll start, 852 00:42:52,362 --> 00:42:53,842 but the hands must be above the head. Good. 853 00:42:53,842 --> 00:42:55,202 STEVE: And we can't go past this white line? 854 00:42:55,202 --> 00:42:57,722 You can't go past. If anyone catches you going over this line, 855 00:42:57,722 --> 00:42:59,202 your team will be disqualified. SOPHIE: Right. 856 00:42:59,202 --> 00:43:00,362 Greg, when's the game over? 857 00:43:00,362 --> 00:43:03,122 The game is only over if I shout, "I cannot see Nick," 858 00:43:03,122 --> 00:43:04,642 or, "I cannot see Joanne." 859 00:43:04,642 --> 00:43:08,242 OK. Flingers, get ready. OK, good luck, hands up. 860 00:43:08,242 --> 00:43:10,602 Head back, head back. Hands up. Let's go. 861 00:43:10,602 --> 00:43:12,962 WHISTLE BLOWS And we're off. Oh! 862 00:43:14,562 --> 00:43:16,202 JOHN: You can move, Joanne, once they're on. 863 00:43:17,282 --> 00:43:19,522 AUDIENCE CHEERS 864 00:43:21,802 --> 00:43:24,722 Don't cross that line, Sophie. I'm not! 865 00:43:26,122 --> 00:43:28,402 Yes! We have one over here. 866 00:43:31,842 --> 00:43:33,042 Good. 867 00:43:38,162 --> 00:43:41,122 Argh! Oh, hands up, hands up at all times. 868 00:43:41,122 --> 00:43:42,962 Oh, they're catching up. 869 00:43:44,482 --> 00:43:45,842 JOHN: Lean back. 870 00:43:45,842 --> 00:43:48,362 AUDIENCE GROANS 871 00:43:49,802 --> 00:43:51,202 CHEERS Oh, it's close, it's close! 872 00:43:51,202 --> 00:43:52,842 Oh, God! 873 00:43:58,362 --> 00:44:00,242 I can just see a little bit of Nick! 874 00:44:01,522 --> 00:44:02,642 Yes! 875 00:44:04,922 --> 00:44:08,762 I cannot see Nick! I cannot see Nick! 876 00:44:08,762 --> 00:44:10,482 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 877 00:44:10,482 --> 00:44:13,762 That was electric. Right, let's free them, 878 00:44:13,762 --> 00:44:16,242 and let's add that to the final scores. Come and join me. 879 00:44:16,242 --> 00:44:17,922 APPLAUSE 880 00:44:25,362 --> 00:44:28,242 Well. It was so close. So close! 881 00:44:28,242 --> 00:44:31,162 Fine margins, it's all about fine margins. 882 00:44:31,162 --> 00:44:33,722 It's all about fine margins. 883 00:44:33,722 --> 00:44:37,602 You want to see some fine margins? JOANNE GASPS, AUDIENCE GROANS 884 00:44:37,602 --> 00:44:39,922 If you're going to show me margins, you make them fine. 885 00:44:41,562 --> 00:44:43,322 Have a look at this fine margin. 886 00:44:43,322 --> 00:44:45,842 JOHN: Oh! 887 00:44:45,842 --> 00:44:48,762 Well, I think what I can see there... Oh, that's Steve. 888 00:44:48,762 --> 00:44:51,482 ..is a foot that's a little bit over the line. 889 00:44:51,482 --> 00:44:54,362 Please, please. I mean, I'm not sure it's conclusive. 890 00:44:54,362 --> 00:44:55,842 But I can show you this one. Yeah. 891 00:44:58,642 --> 00:45:00,602 Well, that would be another foot over the line, would it? 892 00:45:00,602 --> 00:45:02,402 That was about 20 seconds later, or I could show you this one. 893 00:45:02,402 --> 00:45:03,562 Oh, a third? Oh, my... 894 00:45:05,442 --> 00:45:07,522 NICK: Steve! 895 00:45:07,522 --> 00:45:09,842 I'm sorry. No, don't worry. 896 00:45:09,842 --> 00:45:12,562 You don't have to disqualify us. 897 00:45:12,562 --> 00:45:16,322 You think I don't have to follow the rules of the competition, Steve? 898 00:45:16,322 --> 00:45:18,682 Yeah, I do. I think it's your rules, your game. 899 00:45:18,682 --> 00:45:21,882 Well, as much as it breaks my heart, rules are rules. 900 00:45:21,882 --> 00:45:23,722 I'm afraid Nick and Steve are disqualified. 901 00:45:23,722 --> 00:45:25,522 AUDIENCE GROANS 902 00:45:25,522 --> 00:45:29,442 Listen, don't start @-ing me. 903 00:45:29,442 --> 00:45:30,722 We said what the rule was - 904 00:45:30,722 --> 00:45:32,602 if you cross the line, you're disqualified 905 00:45:32,602 --> 00:45:34,922 so I'm afraid it's five points to the team of three. 906 00:45:34,922 --> 00:45:36,802 Wow, and poor old Nick... 907 00:45:36,802 --> 00:45:39,442 I know. I mean, I was at the bottom anyway, but still. 908 00:45:39,442 --> 00:45:41,282 LAUGHTER 909 00:45:41,282 --> 00:45:43,042 And not just the episode, the series. 910 00:45:43,042 --> 00:45:45,762 The series as well, yeah. You're on 72 points. Yeah. 911 00:45:45,762 --> 00:45:49,322 The next one's on 83. That's Sophie. 98 to Steve, 912 00:45:49,322 --> 00:45:51,602 Joanne's on 105, John's on 113. 913 00:45:51,602 --> 00:45:52,842 Joanne's doing really well. 914 00:45:52,842 --> 00:45:54,842 Yeah, you shouldn't seem surprised at one person. 915 00:45:54,842 --> 00:45:56,122 LAUGHTER 916 00:45:56,122 --> 00:45:58,042 No, I'm not... Not surprised, 917 00:45:58,042 --> 00:46:00,002 like, genuinely proud. I think it's brilliant. 918 00:46:02,562 --> 00:46:03,882 So tell me some scores. 919 00:46:03,882 --> 00:46:06,242 That's put the cat amongst the pigeons, so to speak. 920 00:46:06,242 --> 00:46:09,922 Again. Yes, Nick is rooted on ten points. 921 00:46:09,922 --> 00:46:11,442 You can't get much lower than that. 922 00:46:11,442 --> 00:46:13,122 LAUGHTER 923 00:46:13,122 --> 00:46:17,002 But with double that score, it's her first victory. 924 00:46:17,002 --> 00:46:19,602 20 points goes to Joanne McNally. Oh! 925 00:46:19,602 --> 00:46:22,482 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Ah! 926 00:46:22,482 --> 00:46:26,882 Joanne McNally is the winner of episode six! 927 00:46:26,882 --> 00:46:30,002 Please go and get your things you can get into. 928 00:46:30,002 --> 00:46:33,322 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 929 00:46:33,322 --> 00:46:36,522 So what have we learnt from today's show? 930 00:46:36,522 --> 00:46:39,682 We've learnt it's exciting being part of a big show like this, 931 00:46:39,682 --> 00:46:43,322 just as it's exciting being part of a new phenomena, OK? 932 00:46:43,322 --> 00:46:45,762 Because, let's face it, it's not going to be long 933 00:46:45,762 --> 00:46:48,562 until the number one Christmas game is going to be 934 00:46:48,562 --> 00:46:50,842 Mustard, Custard, Oh, My. 935 00:46:52,042 --> 00:46:54,402 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 936 00:46:56,082 --> 00:46:59,922 But, of course, it's all about the winner of episode six. 937 00:46:59,922 --> 00:47:02,202 It's Joanne McNally! 938 00:47:02,202 --> 00:47:06,082 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 939 00:47:31,162 --> 00:47:33,202 Subtitles by Red Bee Media