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This program me contains strong
language and adult humour
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BRASS BAND BUILDS
jUDl LAUGHS
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No way!
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Er...
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Gosh! Where's the hole?
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ARDAL GROANS
SOPHIE CRIES OUT
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CHRIS TRUMPETS
Are you having a laugh?
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GRUNTING
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jUDl GASPS CHRIS CRIES OUT Ooh!
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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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Hello!
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And welcome to another
enchanting new series of Taskmaster.
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I'm Greg Davies
and I am still the Taskmaster,
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and nothing you can say on Twitter
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from your horrible little bedroom
will change that. LAUGHTER
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Five newly hatched competitors
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are trembling off camera
as we speak.
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Nervous little baby birds,
wondering if they've done enough
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for me to reward them with
a dead mouse from my mighty beak.
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LAUGHTER
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Why would they put themselves
through this stress?
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The chance to own my golden head?
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Perhaps.
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The truth is it doesn't matter
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because they must all now continue,
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due to a legally binding contract
they have signed. LAUGHTER
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Let us meet the five
who are legally obliged.
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They are...
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...Ardal O'Hanlon...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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...Bridget Christie...
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...Chris Ramsey...
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...judi Love...
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...and Sophie Duker!
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And next to me, the freshly thawed
corpse of an ancient peat bog man.
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LAUGHTER It's... HIGH—PITCHED
VOICE: Little Alex Horne!
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RAPTUROUS CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
WHISTLING
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LAUGHTER
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Right, what's our first prize
category, please, Alex?
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It is...
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Ooohh!
AUDIENCE OOH
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The thing that if
you found it in a skip,
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you would be most excited by.
LAUGHTER
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Five points will go to the thing
the taskmaster, Greg Davies,
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thinks one would be most excited
about if you found it in a skip
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and at the end, the winner
takes home all five things
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and walk away with a
skip in their step. OK?
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LAUGHTER
Ardal, welcome to the show.
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Oh, thank you.
It's so good to be here.
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What did excite you
when you found it in a skip?
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Oh, erm, a trophy, of course.
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Oh. Not a bad trophy. Oh.
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No. That's cool. Yeah.
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Does it speak of a
fierce ambition in you?
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Well, we've all been there.
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We've all, er, gone
into a trophy shop...
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CHUCKLING ..and we've bought
a trophy and had it engraved and...
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To please father and... Yes.
LAUGHTER
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Were you a sporting elite
as a young man?
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Not really.
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Most of my trophies in my trophy
cabinet are ones I bought.
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It's early days, Ardal.
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I'm going to say
it's around two points.
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Oh, fantastic. That's my
gut instinct at this stage.
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Bridget, what have you brought in?
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I, someone's last
will and testament?
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JUDli Wow. Wow. SOPHIE: Ooh!
LAUGHTER
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She genuinely found this in a skip.
This is what it looks like.
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AUDIENCE OOHS AND AHS
JUDI: Whoa... SOPHIE: My God.
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Oh, man. About 300 years old.
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Look at Ardal's little face.
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Well... I think...
LAUGHTER
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Your trophy's been
pissed on already.
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There was one point over the years
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because I found it years ago
where I thought,
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"Am I going to have
loads of bad luck?"
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You know?
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LAUGHTER
Because you found the...
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Because I've got it up in my hallway
and I don't know whose it is.
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ARDAL: Did you try and
track the person down?
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Oh, no.
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No, I think it's fair to say
they're not around anymore.
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Well, I mean, who are
the beneficiaries of the will?
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Mary. His beloved wife, Mary, is...
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You seem to know a lot about this.
BRIDGET: Oh.
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Well, I've read it.
LAUGHTER
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I'm very excited by your will.
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OK. Christopher?
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I have brought a '90s style
important businessmen briefcase.
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AUDIENCE OOHS AND AHS
WHISTLING That's exciting.
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God, you're all more excited than I
could ever have dreamt. LAUGHTER
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Why are we excited by it?
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Because my house was the first
house made on a new estate
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and in the skip one day
we found a briefcase.
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And it was locked.
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And it took hours to get inside it.
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What was inside it? BRIDGET: Yeah.
What was inside it?
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I was about to say.
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Oh, I'll say it as well. What
was inside it? LAUGHTER
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You'll find out at the end of the
show. Oh! AUDIENCE OOHS AND AHS
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Ooh, he's turned the
excitement up from nought!
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Yep.
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Judi, what have you brought in?
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A Now '90s tape.
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And, you know, it's got
all the classics on there.
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You know the '90s music
was the best?
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Yeah. Look at that. Look at that!
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Take that. I mean, come on.
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Shabba Ranks!
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Mr Lover Lover! Yes... Mm—hmm!
LAUGHTER
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ls Shabba Ranks on there
or were you just exclaiming that?
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No, Shabba Ranks is on there.
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I personally think that
they threw it out by accident.
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You want to show the kids
how times were, you know,
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when you wanted to turn it over
and you used to
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put your finger in the tape
and wind it back?
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These kids don't know
about that now.
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Write down,
"judi Love. Incredible bullshitter."
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Oh, right. Good.
LAUGHTER
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Sophie, can you beat
an old cassette tape? Hello.
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I've brought a multipurpose...
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...seating...device.
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LAUGHTER
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Wow. Look at that!
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Very good.
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Look at that. Wow.
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When you're, like, a millennial,
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you don't get your furniture
from shops.
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You get it from skipping.
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It may qualify as theft
within the Theft Act of 1968,
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unless you've got permission
from the skip owner.
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If something's on the street,
it's yours.
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BRIDGET AND jUDl: Yeah. Not really.
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Cos I leave my car on the street.
LAUGHTER
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just before the show,
Alex said to me... SOPHIE: Yeah?
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"Sophie's brought a sofa in
that she's trying to get rid of."
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LAUGHTER
That's how I understood it.
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Yeah. jUDl: I would never
get rid of my Now 25.
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LAUGHTER
It's Now 24.
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Yeah, that's what I said.
LAUGHTER
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APPLAUSE
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I'm sorry, I wasn't excited
by Ardal's golf trophy.
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One point.
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I mean, the truth is my instinct
was to put the awful sofa in
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at two points,
but I think that's because
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judi did such a good job
of bullshitting me about the tape.
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All them classics!
LAUGHTER
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Judi, can you name one more...
Duran Duran!
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If you can name
one more track off it,
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I'm gonna let you take it. Yes.
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MC Hammer was on one of those,
Michaeljackson and...
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B-b-buh! You've had your guess.
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No MC Hammer on 24.
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No, what I'm saying is...
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I'm so sorry. Two points for Now 24.
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LAUGHTER AUDIENCE
GROANS APPLAUSE
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Great news about your shit sofa.
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You've got three
sweet points for it.
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Yes!
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I'm going to give Chris four points
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because there's something
rather beautiful about that will.
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Aw. So I'm giving Bridget
five points.
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Bridget with five points. Very good.
APPLAUSE
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ARDAL: Well done.
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We're off!
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What does the first
task involve, Alex?
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Well, Greg, if they're successful,
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it'll involve the
natural enemy of bread —
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ducks!
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ALEX WHISTLES
CHUCKLING
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EERIE STRINGS PLAY
JAUNTY PIANO CHORDS PLAY
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Hello.
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Oh, hi, Judi.
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Can I just say, on the door it says,
"No shoes in the lab."
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However, you've got me wearing
these heavy duty boots.
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Right.
CHUCKLING
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Hi. Bridget.
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Hi?
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OK.
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Erm, so I should, I should
probably look for the task.
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Right. That's my first...task.
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LAUGHTER
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Oh, gosh. Oh, no.
CHUCKLING
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So I'll just start over here.
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There it is. You found it?
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I found it straightaway. Good start.
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It's promising.
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Yeah!
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Oh, God Almighty, give me strength.
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LAUGHTER
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Duck.
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Well, this is fun, I love jumping.
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Ooh! I found out the other day
I've got jumping veins.
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Oh, that is good news.
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It's probably easier
for tall people, isn't it?
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Yeah, I realised I put it up
a bit too high, probably.
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BRIDGET GRUNTS
CHUCKLING
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Duck.
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No duck.
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LAUGHTER BRIDGET GRUNTS God!
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What's it stuck on there with?!
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BRIDGET GRUNTS LAUGHTER Oh!
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LAUGHTER
203
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Duck?
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"Find all ten ducks.
205
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"You must stay in the lab.
206
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"Fastest wins.
207
00:09:04,671 --> 00:09:07,485
"You have a maximum of 20 minutes.
208
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"Your time started
when you entered the lab."
209
00:09:09,821 --> 00:09:10,966
Yeah, two minutes gone.
210
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You I...
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LAUGHTER
212
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Fastest...
213
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What does it say?
214
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"Your time started
when you entered the lab?!"
215
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Yeah, you talked about veins
for quite a while. LAUGHTER
216
00:09:25,751 --> 00:09:28,285
"Your time started
when you entered the lab?"
217
00:09:28,310 --> 00:09:30,766
You've found one duck so far.
218
00:09:30,791 --> 00:09:33,046
Ducks as in quack quack ducks?
219
00:09:33,071 --> 00:09:34,285
Erm, yes, please.
220
00:09:34,310 --> 00:09:37,566
APPLAUSE
221
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Chris, you said the word
"duck" an awful lot.
222
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Duck, yeah.
223
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He said "duck"
about eight times, didn't he?
224
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Yes, but he has started well.
He's found the first duck.
225
00:09:48,671 --> 00:09:51,006
There's only ten hidden
in quite a small room.
226
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We've given them a
maximum of 20 minutes
227
00:09:52,871 --> 00:09:55,726
because we thought it was gonna
be quite an easy task. LAUGHTER
228
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Let's have a look at
some duck stuff.
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All right. The first person
we're gonna see is a man —
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he's an Irish man,
he's Ardal O'HanMAN.
231
00:10:02,671 --> 00:10:05,006
Here we go.
LAUGHTER
232
00:10:05,031 --> 00:10:07,365
I imagine there's a duck in here.
SLOW CELLO PLUCKS
233
00:10:07,390 --> 00:10:09,696
There's a box that says
"duck" on it.
234
00:10:09,721 --> 00:10:10,615
OK.
235
00:10:13,231 --> 00:10:14,415
No duck. Ah.
236
00:10:15,721 --> 00:10:17,006
You tricked me.
237
00:10:22,031 --> 00:10:23,526
I haven't found any ducks yet.
238
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How much time have we spent?
Four minutes.
239
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Four minutes and no ducks.
LAUGHTER
240
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TAPPING
241
00:10:30,361 --> 00:10:32,615
LAUGHTER
242
00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:34,446
No ducks.
243
00:10:34,471 --> 00:10:35,526
That a duck?
244
00:10:35,551 --> 00:10:37,526
Do you think it's a duck?
LAUGHTER
245
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Same general species.
246
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OK.
247
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Here, boy.
LAUGHTER
248
00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:49,446
SCATTERED APPLAUSE
249
00:10:49,471 --> 00:10:51,495
SUSPENSEFUL STRINGS PLAY
250
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:52,615
Well, then.
251
00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:54,646
Another one of these.
LAUGHTER
252
00:10:54,671 --> 00:10:56,926
So... All right,
these are the ducks?
253
00:10:57,911 --> 00:10:59,926
I can see it, OK? They're not ducks.
254
00:10:59,951 --> 00:11:01,216
Fucking hens.
255
00:11:01,241 --> 00:11:03,446
LAUGHTER
256
00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:08,336
SUSPENSEFUL BLUES MUSIC PLAYS
257
00:11:08,361 --> 00:11:10,615
This is literally the best I can do.
LAUGHTER
258
00:11:17,310 --> 00:11:18,976
There's not very many ducks in here.
259
00:11:20,390 --> 00:11:23,336
Now, why would you have
asked me to wear heavy boots?
260
00:11:23,361 --> 00:11:24,856
Be nice to find one duck.
261
00:11:24,881 --> 00:11:25,886
It would be good.
262
00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:33,976
AUDIENCE GASPS
263
00:11:34,001 --> 00:11:36,495
AUDIENCE OOHS AND AHS
LAUGHTER
264
00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:38,056
Ooh!
265
00:11:38,081 --> 00:11:39,886
Found a duck!
266
00:11:39,911 --> 00:11:41,886
Ha! Yes!
267
00:11:41,911 --> 00:11:45,136
I can die happy. I found a duck.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
268
00:11:45,161 --> 00:11:47,165
How many minutes left, Alex?
Six minutes left.
269
00:11:47,190 --> 00:11:49,856
Six minutes left.
How many ducks do I need to find?
270
00:11:49,881 --> 00:11:52,136
Nine more. Nine more ducks. OK.
LAUGHTER
271
00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:56,776
There wouldn't be one,
like, inside the hen, would there?
272
00:11:56,801 --> 00:11:59,266
Where would a duck shelter in a hen?
273
00:11:59,291 --> 00:12:02,495
LAUGHTER
You've got 20 seconds.
274
00:12:02,520 --> 00:12:03,576
0h!
275
00:12:05,650 --> 00:12:07,936
QUACKING
That's a duck.
276
00:12:07,961 --> 00:12:09,016
Oh.
277
00:12:09,041 --> 00:12:11,495
WHISTLE BLOWS
You found two ducks.
278
00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:13,086
Oh. I'll take that.
279
00:12:13,111 --> 00:12:15,446
It was looking dodgy there
for a few minutes.
280
00:12:15,471 --> 00:12:18,495
LAUGHTER
APPLAUSE
281
00:12:20,650 --> 00:12:23,216
Up until the third chicken
you brought out,
282
00:12:23,241 --> 00:12:24,776
I was under the impression that
283
00:12:24,801 --> 00:12:26,696
you played a character
in Father Ted.
284
00:12:26,721 --> 00:12:29,016
LAUGHTER
285
00:12:31,270 --> 00:12:32,986
Well, I thought I did really well.
286
00:12:33,011 --> 00:12:35,936
I mean, I thought I was
really good at looking. I just...
287
00:12:35,961 --> 00:12:39,886
LAUGHTER Yeah, I tell you what, you
were mesmerizing to watch looking. Yeah.
288
00:12:39,911 --> 00:12:42,986
I find you a very
soothing presence to watch. Yeah.
289
00:12:43,011 --> 00:12:44,656
I really enjoyed the task.
290
00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:48,066
Like, I would have happily
stayed there for hours.
291
00:12:48,091 --> 00:12:50,096
LAUGHTER
Yeah. Right.
292
00:12:50,121 --> 00:12:52,066
It's the first advert break
of the series
293
00:12:52,091 --> 00:12:54,096
and you know what that means.
294
00:12:54,121 --> 00:12:56,816
Yes, it's time to Google
the cast's ages
295
00:12:56,841 --> 00:12:59,439
and see if you were right.
I'll save you some time.
296
00:12:59,464 --> 00:13:01,199
Chris Ramsey is 56.
297
00:13:01,224 --> 00:13:04,358
See you in a bit! LAUGHTER
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
298
00:13:11,994 --> 00:13:14,368
APPLAUSE
Hello and welcome back!
299
00:13:14,393 --> 00:13:15,418
Where were we, Alex?
300
00:13:15,443 --> 00:13:17,009
Before the break, the new cast
301
00:13:17,034 --> 00:13:19,689
were tasked to find some
hidden ducks in the lab —
302
00:13:19,714 --> 00:13:21,498
ten hidden ducks, to be precise —
303
00:13:21,523 --> 00:13:24,779
and Ardal O'Hanlon kicked off the
new series by finding two of them.
304
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,248
It was a shame. Now it's the turn...
305
00:13:27,273 --> 00:13:29,529
LAUGHTER
..of Sophie and Bridget.
306
00:13:30,674 --> 00:13:31,939
There's a duck here.
307
00:13:31,964 --> 00:13:33,059
What does it say?
308
00:13:33,084 --> 00:13:35,009
No duck. Ah.
309
00:13:35,034 --> 00:13:36,248
OK, that's not a duck.
310
00:13:36,273 --> 00:13:38,939
Erm, can I pull the floor up?
311
00:13:38,964 --> 00:13:41,248
Is that why I've got
these horrible boots on?
312
00:13:41,273 --> 00:13:42,368
Do whatever you want, really.
313
00:13:42,393 --> 00:13:44,418
SOPHIE GASPS
A duck! OK, a duck!
314
00:13:44,443 --> 00:13:46,859
What does it look like?
It's, like, made of electrical...
315
00:13:46,884 --> 00:13:50,019
...wire? Ah. Yeah, I think
you might need to turn that duck on.
316
00:13:50,044 --> 00:13:51,969
How many ducks
have you found so far?
317
00:13:51,994 --> 00:13:54,609
Stop talking to me.
LAUGHTER
318
00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:56,579
One duck. Whey! OK, great.
319
00:13:56,604 --> 00:13:58,418
What's that there? Is that a duck?
320
00:13:58,443 --> 00:13:59,498
Remember what ducks are?
321
00:13:59,523 --> 00:14:00,729
What did you say, pardon?
322
00:14:00,754 --> 00:14:02,219
Do you remember what ducks are?
323
00:14:02,244 --> 00:14:03,779
Are you proud of that?
324
00:14:03,804 --> 00:14:06,529
Are you proud?
LAUGHTER
325
00:14:06,554 --> 00:14:07,739
Hang on.
326
00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:10,739
Is there something else
that is also called a duck?
327
00:14:10,764 --> 00:14:11,969
Like a nail?
328
00:14:11,994 --> 00:14:14,659
LAUGHTER
329
00:14:14,684 --> 00:14:16,969
That's a duck.
Do you think it's a duck?
330
00:14:16,994 --> 00:14:18,298
It might think it's a duck.
331
00:14:18,323 --> 00:14:19,378
Hm.
332
00:14:22,354 --> 00:14:23,529
Oh, you found a duck?
333
00:14:25,244 --> 00:14:27,099
Do I have to kill the chicken?
334
00:14:27,124 --> 00:14:28,418
What do you mean?
335
00:14:28,443 --> 00:14:30,969
CHICKEN RATTLES
336
00:14:32,604 --> 00:14:34,659
LAUGHTER
337
00:14:34,684 --> 00:14:37,219
Ah!
SOPHIE GROANS
338
00:14:37,244 --> 00:14:38,498
QUIETLY: Yes, OK.
339
00:14:40,804 --> 00:14:41,939
Found another one?
340
00:14:43,844 --> 00:14:45,859
QUACKING
341
00:14:45,884 --> 00:14:48,168
OK, that's a duck. Yep.
Two ducks. Well done.
342
00:14:48,193 --> 00:14:49,498
There might be some up there.
343
00:14:51,354 --> 00:14:52,859
Can you give me a piggyback?
344
00:14:52,884 --> 00:14:53,939
Yes.
345
00:14:53,964 --> 00:14:56,498
Like, I did this a lot
at university. A lot?
346
00:14:56,523 --> 00:14:59,099
Yeah. So...OK. Right.
347
00:14:59,124 --> 00:15:00,859
So, like, up. Yeah, I, yes, Ma'am.
348
00:15:00,884 --> 00:15:03,329
Ah! Sorry.
LAUGHTER
349
00:15:03,354 --> 00:15:04,739
One...two...
350
00:15:04,764 --> 00:15:06,739
...three! You're up.
LAUGHTER
351
00:15:06,764 --> 00:15:08,248
Right. Now what? You all right?
352
00:15:08,273 --> 00:15:11,139
Yes. There are some letters
up there, though — A, R, D.
353
00:15:11,164 --> 00:15:13,048
Nard? Anard?
354
00:15:13,073 --> 00:15:14,498
Canard!
355
00:15:14,523 --> 00:15:15,939
That's a duck. Yes, correct.
356
00:15:16,994 --> 00:15:19,329
Erm... Er...
LAUGHTER
357
00:15:19,354 --> 00:15:21,689
You're sort of steering me
with your thighs.
358
00:15:21,714 --> 00:15:23,498
Yeah. Hm.
LAUGHTER
359
00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:25,789
Oh, that way, is it?
360
00:15:25,814 --> 00:15:26,659
Now it's dark.
361
00:15:26,684 --> 00:15:28,899
Yeah, we're just going to be here...
362
00:15:29,924 --> 00:15:31,819
...and wait for a duck to appear.
363
00:15:31,844 --> 00:15:34,099
LAUGHTER
364
00:15:34,124 --> 00:15:36,508
They might put some in the boots.
365
00:15:38,484 --> 00:15:41,298
BRIDGET INHALES DEEPLY
BRIDGET LAUGHS No.
366
00:15:41,323 --> 00:15:43,899
Nothing in there.
AUDIENCE AWS
367
00:15:43,924 --> 00:15:45,048
It's a duck.
368
00:15:45,073 --> 00:15:46,178
There's a torch.
369
00:15:46,203 --> 00:15:47,178
Is that anything?
370
00:15:48,254 --> 00:15:50,079
Where are you, little duckers?
371
00:15:50,104 --> 00:15:52,389
LAUGHTER
What would it be?
372
00:15:52,414 --> 00:15:53,919
You've got 50 seconds.
373
00:15:53,944 --> 00:15:55,358
WHISPERING: Where are you?
374
00:15:58,183 --> 00:16:00,079
There's a duck here. Where?
375
00:16:00,104 --> 00:16:01,129
On the task.
376
00:16:01,154 --> 00:16:02,519
There's a duck.
377
00:16:02,544 --> 00:16:04,919
BRIDGET GASPS
WHISTLE BLOWS
378
00:16:04,944 --> 00:16:08,389
APPLAUSE
379
00:16:10,744 --> 00:16:13,319
Pretty sweet haul of ducks. Hm.
380
00:16:13,344 --> 00:16:14,358
Pleased with that?
381
00:16:14,383 --> 00:16:15,929
No. No?
382
00:16:15,954 --> 00:16:17,278
Less than half the ducks.
383
00:16:17,303 --> 00:16:18,879
I think it's a brilliant result.
384
00:16:20,513 --> 00:16:22,849
Sorry, it was,
it was very, very good.
385
00:16:22,874 --> 00:16:24,639
BRIDGET: I was pleased
with the writing one.
386
00:16:24,664 --> 00:16:26,599
JUDl: I mean, that was...
That was hard.
387
00:16:26,624 --> 00:16:29,519
SOPHIE: It was in French as well.
CHRIS: Really good. I know.
388
00:16:29,544 --> 00:16:31,879
What did you do a lot
at university, Sophie?
389
00:16:31,904 --> 00:16:33,929
You said, "I did this
a lot at university"
390
00:16:33,954 --> 00:16:36,288
You were getting on
Alex's shoulders at the time.
391
00:16:36,313 --> 00:16:38,288
Yeah, I... A lot of riding
men at parties.
392
00:16:38,313 --> 00:16:40,358
LAUGHTER
393
00:16:40,383 --> 00:16:43,288
If you're short, at a concert or
something, you've got to ride...
394
00:16:43,313 --> 00:16:45,238
You're speaking to
the wrong person, I think.
395
00:16:45,263 --> 00:16:47,569
Oh, yeah, OK.
But people must have ridden you.
396
00:16:47,594 --> 00:16:49,488
LAUGHTER
397
00:16:49,513 --> 00:16:52,319
Not for a while.
LAUGHTER
398
00:16:52,344 --> 00:16:53,649
Four ducks each. Nice.
399
00:16:53,674 --> 00:16:54,719
Who's next?
400
00:16:54,744 --> 00:16:57,038
Now it's time for the
final two duck hunters.
401
00:16:57,063 --> 00:16:58,079
It's the big JC.
402
00:16:58,104 --> 00:16:59,399
It's Judi and Chris.
403
00:16:59,424 --> 00:17:00,929
Here we go.
404
00:17:00,954 --> 00:17:03,238
What are these?
Are these ducks or chickens?
405
00:17:03,263 --> 00:17:04,799
What do you reckon, duck or chicken?
406
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:06,129
Oh, God. Judi?
407
00:17:06,154 --> 00:17:07,599
Yeah?
408
00:17:07,624 --> 00:17:08,959
Is this a box?
409
00:17:08,984 --> 00:17:10,399
Yes.
410
00:17:10,424 --> 00:17:11,599
How does it open?
411
00:17:12,674 --> 00:17:13,649
Oh.
412
00:17:14,704 --> 00:17:17,009
Well, there's not a duck
in there, is there?
413
00:17:17,034 --> 00:17:18,089
No, I don't think so.
414
00:17:22,954 --> 00:17:24,569
That's Richard Herring.
415
00:17:24,594 --> 00:17:27,038
LAUGHTER
What colour is he?
416
00:17:27,063 --> 00:17:29,038
LAUGHTER
417
00:17:30,234 --> 00:17:31,959
Am I hot?
418
00:17:31,984 --> 00:17:34,288
Oh, yes.
LAUGHTER
419
00:17:34,313 --> 00:17:35,519
Take your shirt off.
420
00:17:35,544 --> 00:17:36,959
Take your shirt off. Please.
421
00:17:38,034 --> 00:17:40,449
Rub against the wall.
Search the wall.
422
00:17:40,474 --> 00:17:42,759
LAUGHTER
Oh, come...
423
00:17:42,784 --> 00:17:45,238
Feel the wall, feel the wall.
424
00:17:45,263 --> 00:17:46,569
Where is the ducks?
425
00:17:48,114 --> 00:17:50,519
Turn around.
WHOOPING
426
00:17:50,544 --> 00:17:51,599
Goddamn it.
427
00:17:51,624 --> 00:17:55,009
Is there any ducks in your shoes?
Ducks on the bottom of your shoes?
428
00:17:55,034 --> 00:17:58,168
Why would there be ducks on my
shoes? I don't know, is there...
429
00:17:58,193 --> 00:18:01,238
Ah! Two ducks! Two ducks.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
430
00:18:01,263 --> 00:18:02,959
One...
431
00:18:02,984 --> 00:18:05,449
"two... That's, I'm ducking. Right.
LAUGHTER
432
00:18:05,474 --> 00:18:07,238
Will you finish that cup of tea?
433
00:18:07,263 --> 00:18:10,959
I feel like there's a duck in it. Why am
I paranoid about ducks? LAUGHTER
434
00:18:12,554 --> 00:18:14,569
Yes!
435
00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:17,009
Yes! OK.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
436
00:18:17,034 --> 00:18:19,759
jUDl LAUGHS
437
00:18:19,784 --> 00:18:22,759
QUACKING
There's a torch.
438
00:18:22,784 --> 00:18:25,368
Am I just going to have
to sweep the whole room?!
439
00:18:27,834 --> 00:18:30,089
Duck! Duck!
APPLAUSE
440
00:18:30,914 --> 00:18:32,649
Yes! Here's one.
441
00:18:34,114 --> 00:18:36,089
Aha!
QUACKING
442
00:18:36,114 --> 00:18:37,368
You've just found a duck.
443
00:18:37,393 --> 00:18:38,759
Ooh!
444
00:18:38,784 --> 00:18:40,118
Can you open this, please?
445
00:18:40,143 --> 00:18:41,399
What's in it for me?
446
00:18:41,424 --> 00:18:44,759
What's in it for you is I'm not
going to get pissed off.
447
00:18:44,784 --> 00:18:46,288
Can you open this, please?
448
00:18:46,313 --> 00:18:47,529
Right, o|<.
449
00:18:47,554 --> 00:18:49,009
Is this your tea?
450
00:18:49,034 --> 00:18:50,009
Yes.
451
00:18:51,273 --> 00:18:53,759
LAUGHTER
452
00:18:53,784 --> 00:18:56,729
APPLAUSE
Honestly, like, where are you from?
453
00:18:57,754 --> 00:18:58,889
West Sussex. No.
454
00:18:58,914 --> 00:19:01,168
LAUGHTER
455
00:19:01,193 --> 00:19:02,579
Is it inside the table?
456
00:19:02,604 --> 00:19:05,579
SQUEAKING
457
00:19:05,604 --> 00:19:07,248
Duck. OK. Found a duck.
458
00:19:07,273 --> 00:19:09,248
CHRIS SQUEALS
Duck! Duck, duck, duck,
459
00:19:09,273 --> 00:19:10,649
duck, duck, duck, duck, duck!
460
00:19:10,674 --> 00:19:12,248
Two minutes. Ah!
461
00:19:13,674 --> 00:19:15,118
Ah... Ooh!
462
00:19:15,143 --> 00:19:16,329
Found one!
463
00:19:16,354 --> 00:19:17,368
Oh, really?
464
00:19:17,393 --> 00:19:18,449
Yep.
465
00:19:18,474 --> 00:19:19,859
That's a stray duck.
466
00:19:19,884 --> 00:19:21,009
That's a duck.
467
00:19:21,034 --> 00:19:23,368
Yeah, that's a duck
we didn't know was there.
468
00:19:23,393 --> 00:19:25,649
LAUGHTER
Can I lift the floor?
469
00:19:26,504 --> 00:19:27,529
Duck!
470
00:19:27,554 --> 00:19:28,649
Duck!
471
00:19:28,674 --> 00:19:30,118
Yes! 30 seconds.
472
00:19:30,143 --> 00:19:32,168
This is not a duck on my face?
473
00:19:32,193 --> 00:19:35,089
No, I, hm... ls there a duck
on my face? LAUGHTER
474
00:19:36,393 --> 00:19:37,689
One more duck.
475
00:19:37,714 --> 00:19:39,048
Oh, my God!
476
00:19:39,073 --> 00:19:40,859
This is so frustrating!
477
00:19:40,884 --> 00:19:43,168
Ah!
WHISTLE BLOWS
478
00:19:43,193 --> 00:19:44,939
That was...
479
00:19:44,964 --> 00:19:46,019
...horrible.
480
00:19:46,044 --> 00:19:48,298
LAUGHTER
481
00:19:48,323 --> 00:19:51,609
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
482
00:19:51,634 --> 00:19:52,809
JUDI: Brilliant! Well done.
483
00:19:52,834 --> 00:19:53,939
Thank you.
484
00:19:53,964 --> 00:19:56,219
BRIDGET: Both amazing.
485
00:19:56,244 --> 00:19:57,969
How many ducks did they both get?
486
00:19:57,994 --> 00:20:01,969
Well, Judi found a stray duck
that genuinely we'd put on the wall
487
00:20:01,994 --> 00:20:03,579
years ago for another task...
488
00:20:03,604 --> 00:20:05,939
LAUGHTER ..which is
quite odd, so she found...
489
00:20:05,964 --> 00:20:06,739
Bonus duck?
490
00:20:06,764 --> 00:20:08,298
Yeah. JUDI: Wow. She found six,
491
00:20:08,323 --> 00:20:09,969
but didn't find five.
492
00:20:09,994 --> 00:20:13,248
LAUGHTER She also said, "ls
there a duck on my face" for ages.
493
00:20:13,273 --> 00:20:16,449
Yeah. Yeah, because you just
kept on looking at me strange.
494
00:20:16,474 --> 00:20:19,809
I wish we had a still of the
picture of you under that light.
495
00:20:19,834 --> 00:20:20,889
Oh, my God!
496
00:20:20,914 --> 00:20:24,048
Just so we can check if
there was a duck on your face.
497
00:20:24,073 --> 00:20:27,529
Was there a duck on my face?!
Well, let's find out in a minute.
498
00:20:27,554 --> 00:20:30,378
LAUGHTER
499
00:20:30,403 --> 00:20:33,329
CHRIS: Brilliant. Absolutely
brilliant. APPLAUSE
500
00:20:33,354 --> 00:20:34,659
BRIDGET: That looks amazing.
501
00:20:34,684 --> 00:20:35,689
No duck.
502
00:20:36,794 --> 00:20:40,128
Chris altogether found seven ducks.
503
00:20:40,153 --> 00:20:43,128
JUDI: Wow. Congratulations.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
504
00:20:43,153 --> 00:20:44,969
That's very good.
505
00:20:44,994 --> 00:20:46,019
JUDl: Wow.
506
00:20:46,044 --> 00:20:47,248
Right, give me some scores.
507
00:20:47,273 --> 00:20:48,298
Yes, all right, then.
508
00:20:48,323 --> 00:20:50,019
Chris won the task with seven ducks.
509
00:20:50,044 --> 00:20:51,128
Judi second with six.
510
00:20:51,153 --> 00:20:54,219
Sophie and Bridget both
get three points with four ducks.
511
00:20:54,244 --> 00:20:56,819
Ardaljust the one point
after his two ducks.
512
00:20:56,844 --> 00:20:58,409
So Chris Ramsey wins five points!
513
00:20:58,434 --> 00:20:59,459
There it is!
514
00:20:59,484 --> 00:21:01,739
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
515
00:21:01,764 --> 00:21:02,739
Scoreboard time?
516
00:21:02,764 --> 00:21:03,769
Yes. Um, I'm...
517
00:21:03,794 --> 00:21:04,849
That's nice.
518
00:21:04,874 --> 00:21:07,219
I'm afraid that Ardal has
minimal points with two.
519
00:21:07,244 --> 00:21:09,969
Chris is in the lead
with nine points at this stage.
520
00:21:09,994 --> 00:21:12,409
GASPING WHISTLING
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
521
00:21:12,434 --> 00:21:13,459
Here we go.
522
00:21:13,484 --> 00:21:15,739
Let's have another task, please!
523
00:21:15,764 --> 00:21:16,659
Of course.
524
00:21:16,684 --> 00:21:19,819
And perhaps as a nod to how we
resolve our frequent little tiffs,
525
00:21:19,844 --> 00:21:22,459
this one involves kissing
and make-up.
526
00:21:22,484 --> 00:21:24,489
LAUGHTER
527
00:21:24,514 --> 00:21:26,819
MEXICAN BAND PLAYS
528
00:21:36,644 --> 00:21:37,619
Right.
529
00:21:38,644 --> 00:21:39,899
I'm in business.
530
00:21:41,124 --> 00:21:42,258
That's more like it.
531
00:21:42,283 --> 00:21:43,258
Yeah.
532
00:21:44,283 --> 00:21:46,209
Have you just eaten something?
533
00:21:46,234 --> 00:21:47,489
I had some crisps.
534
00:21:47,514 --> 00:21:48,939
That'll be it. Yep.
535
00:21:48,964 --> 00:21:51,178
CHUCKLING
536
00:21:52,874 --> 00:21:54,819
"Create the best picture
of the Taskmaster,
537
00:21:54,844 --> 00:21:56,769
using only lipstick on your lips.
538
00:21:56,794 --> 00:21:58,589
"ON your lips?!"
539
00:21:58,614 --> 00:22:00,939
"You have ten minutes
and your picture must fill
540
00:22:00,964 --> 00:22:02,409
most of the canvas.
541
00:22:02,434 --> 00:22:05,378
"And your picture must
fill most of the canvas."
542
00:22:05,403 --> 00:22:06,819
Are you having a laugh?
543
00:22:06,844 --> 00:22:09,589
LAUGHTER
Your time starts now.
544
00:22:09,614 --> 00:22:11,178
Er, the Taskmaster.
545
00:22:11,203 --> 00:22:12,739
He is... He's...
546
00:22:13,794 --> 00:22:16,099
...pretty peaky at the best
of times, isn't he?
547
00:22:16,124 --> 00:22:17,308
Can I...
548
00:22:17,333 --> 00:22:19,659
I'm gonna go get
a picture of him, innit.
549
00:22:19,684 --> 00:22:22,128
Can't remember what
he looks like from memory.
550
00:22:22,153 --> 00:22:23,739
Got a picture of him.
551
00:22:23,764 --> 00:22:25,178
That looks nothing like him.
552
00:22:25,203 --> 00:22:26,819
Has he got blue eyes?
553
00:22:26,844 --> 00:22:28,699
I think they're blue.
Are they green?
554
00:22:28,724 --> 00:22:30,019
It doesn't matter, does it?
555
00:22:31,924 --> 00:22:34,308
Is that good?
Is that a good thing to do?
556
00:22:34,333 --> 00:22:35,378
I think so, yeah.
557
00:22:39,804 --> 00:22:42,099
LAUGHTER
558
00:22:47,564 --> 00:22:50,229
Are you using your lips
as a palette?
559
00:22:50,254 --> 00:22:51,459
Yeah. Good.
560
00:22:52,844 --> 00:22:55,258
Your eyes go very big
when you put it on.
561
00:22:55,283 --> 00:22:56,979
That's, do you not
know about lipstick?
562
00:22:57,004 --> 00:22:59,029
No.
LAUGHTER
563
00:22:59,054 --> 00:23:01,029
SOPHIE CHUCKLES
LAUGHTER
564
00:23:01,054 --> 00:23:03,339
SOPHIE MOANS
565
00:23:03,364 --> 00:23:05,899
LAUGHTER
Mm—mwah!
566
00:23:09,774 --> 00:23:12,258
LAUGHTER
567
00:23:12,283 --> 00:23:14,539
PAPER SQUEAKS
568
00:23:14,564 --> 00:23:16,899
Oh. Are you blowing out?
569
00:23:16,924 --> 00:23:19,819
No. No, that's just the noise
the blue makes.
570
00:23:19,844 --> 00:23:21,859
LAUGHTER
571
00:23:21,884 --> 00:23:22,928
Christ alive.
572
00:23:22,953 --> 00:23:24,058
Um...
573
00:23:24,083 --> 00:23:25,258
Ooh!
574
00:23:25,283 --> 00:23:27,569
The lipstick is on your lips,
is it still?
575
00:23:27,594 --> 00:23:28,569
Mm—hmm. Mm—hmm.
576
00:23:28,594 --> 00:23:29,699
Mm—hmm. Oh, yeah?
577
00:23:32,163 --> 00:23:34,178
LAUGHTER
578
00:23:34,203 --> 00:23:35,419
You're quite aggressive with it.
579
00:23:35,444 --> 00:23:37,219
There's no other lips I can use?
580
00:23:37,244 --> 00:23:38,388
No, no. No, no.
581
00:23:38,413 --> 00:23:40,928
LAUGHTER
582
00:23:40,953 --> 00:23:42,979
SOPHIE MOANS
583
00:23:43,004 --> 00:23:44,579
MUFFLED: Mm, it looks lovely.
584
00:23:44,604 --> 00:23:46,579
Pardon? MUFFLED: It looks lovely.
585
00:23:48,364 --> 00:23:49,388
Oh, God.
586
00:23:49,413 --> 00:23:51,749
This is what he looks like
587
00:23:51,774 --> 00:23:54,219
when he goes home,
when he's on his own.
588
00:23:54,244 --> 00:23:56,579
HIGH-PITCHED VOICE: Hello! I'm Greg.
589
00:23:56,604 --> 00:24:00,619
I think I have some, er,
crisps for me to eat.
590
00:24:00,644 --> 00:24:02,619
Eh?
LAUGHTER
591
00:24:02,644 --> 00:24:04,109
I think I'm happy with that.
592
00:24:05,694 --> 00:24:08,029
WHISTLE BLOWS
593
00:24:09,083 --> 00:24:10,138
Oh.
594
00:24:10,163 --> 00:24:13,109
LAUGHTER
APPLAUSE
595
00:24:14,134 --> 00:24:15,549
Enjoy that, Sophie?
596
00:24:15,574 --> 00:24:16,619
Yeah. Yeah.
597
00:24:16,644 --> 00:24:19,469
Yeah, I liked it. Something else
you used to do at university?
598
00:24:20,494 --> 00:24:22,779
I was trying to be precise.
599
00:24:22,804 --> 00:24:24,188
You really got into it.
600
00:24:24,213 --> 00:24:25,469
JUDl: Loving up, you done...
601
00:24:25,494 --> 00:24:28,138
The thing that annoyed me the
most about this task was
602
00:24:28,163 --> 00:24:31,268
I was embarrassed at how
out of breath I was at the end.
603
00:24:31,293 --> 00:24:32,749
All I'd done was like that.
604
00:24:32,774 --> 00:24:34,469
Woodpeckers must be hard as fuck.
605
00:24:34,494 --> 00:24:36,979
LAUGHTER
606
00:24:39,524 --> 00:24:41,938
Right. Well, I look forward
to seeing these creations
607
00:24:41,963 --> 00:24:44,499
right after these car adverts.
608
00:24:44,524 --> 00:24:46,469
CHRIS: Oh, good.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
609
00:24:54,085 --> 00:24:57,101
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
Hello!
610
00:24:57,126 --> 00:24:59,501
Welcome back to the second
half of the show.
611
00:24:59,526 --> 00:25:02,421
Can I see lots of pictures
of me, please, Little Alex Horne?
612
00:25:02,446 --> 00:25:05,010
Yes. You're vain,
but I don't blame you at all.
613
00:25:05,035 --> 00:25:06,111
Beautiful.
614
00:25:06,136 --> 00:25:08,390
Let's see Bridget's lipstick pic.
615
00:25:08,415 --> 00:25:09,541
Here it is.
616
00:25:09,566 --> 00:25:12,571
Ooh! JUDI: That is good.
LAUGHTER
617
00:25:12,596 --> 00:25:14,901
SOPHIE: Wow.
She's certainly captured my breasts.
618
00:25:14,926 --> 00:25:17,221
LAUGHTER
619
00:25:17,246 --> 00:25:20,010
Well, she said it's a bra
and a little dress,
620
00:25:20,035 --> 00:25:22,341
and you're saying,
"Where's my crisps?
621
00:25:22,366 --> 00:25:23,541
"I hate my job."
622
00:25:23,566 --> 00:25:25,861
LAUGHTER
I feel the same.
623
00:25:25,886 --> 00:25:27,781
I tried to get the essence of you.
624
00:25:27,806 --> 00:25:29,260
I've eaten a lot of crisps.
625
00:25:29,285 --> 00:25:31,221
Yeah. I've got big, I got big tits?
626
00:25:31,246 --> 00:25:33,621
LAUGHTER
627
00:25:35,606 --> 00:25:37,140
Good start. Who's next?
628
00:25:37,165 --> 00:25:39,421
Next, it's Judi's picture.
629
00:25:39,446 --> 00:25:41,831
LAUGHTER
630
00:25:43,085 --> 00:25:45,471
Even you can't justify this.
631
00:25:45,496 --> 00:25:46,781
Let me tell you something.
632
00:25:46,806 --> 00:25:50,010
I drawed you, see, on your throne
633
00:25:50,035 --> 00:25:51,551
like the King that you are.
634
00:25:51,576 --> 00:25:54,221
She did use the whole canvas more
than the other contestants.
635
00:25:54,246 --> 00:25:56,861
This is what I'm saying.
Oh, so we should reward that?
636
00:25:56,886 --> 00:25:58,140
Yes. You could. You could.
637
00:25:58,165 --> 00:26:01,471
What, for drawing a little
Lego figure inside a clown head?
638
00:26:01,496 --> 00:26:03,781
LAUGHTER
639
00:26:07,165 --> 00:26:09,111
CHRIS: That's the least
calm he's been!
640
00:26:10,646 --> 00:26:12,940
You've ignited a fire in Ardal.
641
00:26:12,965 --> 00:26:15,981
If that's what my painting does,
then that is true art.
642
00:26:16,006 --> 00:26:17,940
There you go. CHRIS: Oh, my word!
643
00:26:17,965 --> 00:26:19,060
That is...
644
00:26:20,136 --> 00:26:21,831
...phenomenal bullshit.
645
00:26:21,856 --> 00:26:23,861
JUDl LAUGHS
646
00:26:23,886 --> 00:26:25,301
This is Chris' picture.
647
00:26:25,326 --> 00:26:27,581
AUDIENCE OOHS AND AHS
648
00:26:27,606 --> 00:26:28,781
Come on.
649
00:26:28,806 --> 00:26:31,731
I'll put it side by side with
the picture he was using.
650
00:26:31,756 --> 00:26:34,111
It's good. He used a good one.
SOPHIE: Wow.
651
00:26:34,136 --> 00:26:36,421
APPLAUSE
Aw.
652
00:26:36,446 --> 00:26:38,060
I was not expecting this.
653
00:26:39,246 --> 00:26:41,551
Here are Ardal's lips in action.
654
00:26:41,576 --> 00:26:43,111
Aw, this'll do. He did that.
655
00:26:43,136 --> 00:26:44,991
LAUGHTER
Yeah.
656
00:26:45,016 --> 00:26:46,701
BRIDGET: That's really good.
Now, earlier, Ardal,
657
00:26:46,726 --> 00:26:48,101
you mentioned the word clown.
658
00:26:48,126 --> 00:26:50,351
LAUGHTER
659
00:26:51,215 --> 00:26:52,741
One of Britain's great clowns.
660
00:26:52,766 --> 00:26:54,631
Yes.
661
00:26:54,656 --> 00:26:58,060
The most important thing, the
stuff that, you know, is the aura,
662
00:26:58,085 --> 00:27:02,020
which is not, like, painted,
it's just implied.
663
00:27:02,045 --> 00:27:03,831
OK.
664
00:27:03,856 --> 00:27:06,101
And what do you sense of my aura?
665
00:27:06,126 --> 00:27:07,301
Specialness, um...
666
00:27:07,326 --> 00:27:09,270
LAUGHTER
SOPHIE: What do you mean, special?
667
00:27:10,326 --> 00:27:12,661
Blimey. I wasn't
expecting good stuff.
668
00:27:12,686 --> 00:27:14,991
Right, well... I hope
Sophie can drag things down.
669
00:27:15,016 --> 00:27:16,351
She created this.
670
00:27:16,376 --> 00:27:18,831
LAUGHTER
671
00:27:18,856 --> 00:27:22,501
Ah. She used the portrait
behind her as her starting point.
672
00:27:22,526 --> 00:27:25,471
I feel like it's like a sort
of Dorian Gray—type picture.
673
00:27:25,496 --> 00:27:29,140
So, like, that's the macabre,
hideous version of you.
674
00:27:29,165 --> 00:27:31,190
And then here...
LAUGHTER
675
00:27:31,215 --> 00:27:32,991
And then here
there's the beautiful man.
676
00:27:33,016 --> 00:27:35,940
Yeah. It doesn't look unlike
my grandmother, so...
677
00:27:35,965 --> 00:27:37,991
LAUGHTER
678
00:27:38,016 --> 00:27:40,301
I feel sad if...
679
00:27:40,326 --> 00:27:42,741
LAUGHTER
Good. Good.
680
00:27:44,406 --> 00:27:45,911
I mean, I think it's brilliant,
681
00:27:45,936 --> 00:27:48,221
but it doesn't bear any
resemblance to you, so...
682
00:27:48,246 --> 00:27:50,070
It should all be about the accuracy.
683
00:27:50,095 --> 00:27:52,991
Yeah. So I should forget the
stuff you said about essence?
684
00:27:53,016 --> 00:27:55,631
No, but I mean, essence is real.
I mean...
685
00:27:55,656 --> 00:27:56,631
LAUGHTER
686
00:27:58,936 --> 00:28:01,270
Let's have a look at them
all together before I get
687
00:28:01,295 --> 00:28:04,020
any more mind games.
Here we have five Gregs.
688
00:28:04,045 --> 00:28:08,381
Chris, without the actual painting
next to yours. Yeah...
689
00:28:08,406 --> 00:28:10,711
You know. Nah.
690
00:28:10,736 --> 00:28:13,270
Bridget, yours looks like a haunted
sex doll.
691
00:28:13,295 --> 00:28:16,070
SHRIEKS OF LAUGHTER
692
00:28:16,095 --> 00:28:19,020
Why is that a bad thing?
693
00:28:19,045 --> 00:28:21,741
Right then, Greg, we need
some points. All right.
694
00:28:21,766 --> 00:28:25,190
One point to judi. OK. For throwing
lipstick against a canvas.
695
00:28:26,376 --> 00:28:28,791
Between Ardal and Sophie for this.
696
00:28:28,816 --> 00:28:29,791
What?
697
00:28:33,616 --> 00:28:35,871
You're genuinely shocked.
698
00:28:35,896 --> 00:28:37,511
Let's give them three points each.
699
00:28:37,536 --> 00:28:41,020
So it's three points to Ardal
and Sophie. Correct.
700
00:28:41,045 --> 00:28:42,591
Four to...? Four to...
701
00:28:42,616 --> 00:28:46,231
...the very cross sex doll that
Bridget created and obviously,
702
00:28:46,256 --> 00:28:49,591
Chris Ramsey, the only artist in the
room, takes the five.
703
00:28:52,816 --> 00:28:55,631
Let's have another one. Next up is
this...
704
00:29:09,295 --> 00:29:11,921
SPAGHETTI WESTERN TYPE THEME PLAYS
705
00:29:11,946 --> 00:29:13,820
DOOR CREAKS
706
00:29:25,175 --> 00:29:27,741
WHISTLING
707
00:29:31,486 --> 00:29:32,871
Oh.
708
00:29:32,896 --> 00:29:35,101
SHOWDOWN MUSIC
709
00:29:46,946 --> 00:29:48,711
Ready?
710
00:29:48,736 --> 00:29:49,711
I don't know.
711
00:29:52,055 --> 00:29:53,231
Phoar!
712
00:29:53,256 --> 00:29:54,921
Yeah?
713
00:29:54,946 --> 00:29:57,641
"Devise a duel
and have the duel with Alex."
714
00:29:57,666 --> 00:29:59,950
That's you. Line.
715
00:29:59,975 --> 00:30:04,431
"You have 20 minutes to devise your
duel and have the duel with Alex."
716
00:30:04,456 --> 00:30:06,721
"Most exhilarating duel wins."
717
00:30:06,746 --> 00:30:09,030
"Your time starts now."
718
00:30:09,055 --> 00:30:11,921
Do you think you're going to win
the duel? Yeah, probably.
719
00:30:11,946 --> 00:30:13,341
I mean, I usually win duels.
720
00:30:13,366 --> 00:30:15,851
LAUGHTER
721
00:30:15,876 --> 00:30:17,651
Have you had a duel before?
722
00:30:17,676 --> 00:30:19,731
No, I've never duelled anyone.
723
00:30:19,756 --> 00:30:22,180
I didn't think I was going
to have to duel you.
724
00:30:22,205 --> 00:30:24,930
Are you good at throwing?
Yeah.
725
00:30:24,955 --> 00:30:26,451
No, I don't want that, then.
726
00:30:26,476 --> 00:30:29,291
What are you crap at? DIY.
727
00:30:31,396 --> 00:30:34,621
Gut instinct tells me that Sophie's
going to be the best at this purely
728
00:30:34,646 --> 00:30:36,621
because her, "I've never duelled
anyone.
729
00:30:36,646 --> 00:30:39,541
I didn't think I was going
to have to duel you."
730
00:30:39,566 --> 00:30:41,930
It sounded like an actual Clint
Eastwood line.
731
00:30:41,955 --> 00:30:43,701
I'm sorely tempted to just
crack on. Let's do it.
732
00:30:43,726 --> 00:30:44,901
Let's see 'em.
733
00:30:44,926 --> 00:30:49,260
Well, first of all, we have "Arduel"
and "Dueldi". Ardal and Judi.
734
00:30:49,285 --> 00:30:50,010
Here we go.
735
00:30:50,035 --> 00:30:52,501
DRAMATIC MUSIC
736
00:30:55,726 --> 00:30:59,451
So, Alex, I'm going for a fairly
traditional duel,
737
00:30:59,476 --> 00:31:00,901
so to start with...
738
00:31:02,446 --> 00:31:04,260
...I'm going to get the...
739
00:31:06,676 --> 00:31:08,981
Do you want a hand?
Yeah, please. Thank you.
740
00:31:10,196 --> 00:31:11,171
OK, then.
741
00:31:14,446 --> 00:31:16,091
I challenge you to a duel.
742
00:31:16,116 --> 00:31:17,451
I accept your challenge.
743
00:31:17,476 --> 00:31:19,421
OK, cool.
744
00:31:19,446 --> 00:31:23,260
For this exhilarating duel,
you're going to have these
745
00:31:23,285 --> 00:31:24,810
roller-skates on.
746
00:31:24,835 --> 00:31:28,341
Oh, yeah. I'd say the roller—skates
are size five to eight.
747
00:31:28,366 --> 00:31:30,731
And you are size? Size ten.
748
00:31:30,756 --> 00:31:31,901
We've all done that.
749
00:31:31,926 --> 00:31:34,171
Especially if the shoes are hot.
750
00:31:35,246 --> 00:31:37,501
Do you want to choose your weapon?
751
00:31:37,526 --> 00:31:40,291
Got bananas or oranges?
752
00:31:40,316 --> 00:31:42,091
Ah! Bananas, please.
753
00:31:42,116 --> 00:31:44,651
OK, I want you to wear an eye patch.
754
00:31:46,526 --> 00:31:48,781
I'll be fine. Thank you.
755
00:31:48,806 --> 00:31:49,981
You've got one ball.
756
00:31:50,006 --> 00:31:51,781
You have to hit me in the knee
five times.
757
00:31:51,806 --> 00:31:54,651
You can't hit anywhere else
on my body.
758
00:31:54,676 --> 00:31:57,421
And where are you going
to be hitting me? Free for all.
759
00:31:57,446 --> 00:31:58,911
You're going to hit me anywhere?
760
00:31:58,936 --> 00:32:00,371
Yeah. OK.
761
00:32:00,396 --> 00:32:02,781
OK, so just go back to back
five paces.
762
00:32:02,806 --> 00:32:03,861
Yep.
763
00:32:03,886 --> 00:32:04,911
One.
764
00:32:04,936 --> 00:32:07,621
SPAGHETTI WESTERN THEME PLAYS
765
00:32:10,756 --> 00:32:12,371
|'m...|'m ready.
766
00:32:12,396 --> 00:32:15,140
Once sec, just fixing my hair.
767
00:32:16,246 --> 00:32:18,020
LAUGHTER
768
00:32:18,045 --> 00:32:19,020
Marks.
769
00:32:21,556 --> 00:32:23,171
Get set.
SHE SLURPS
770
00:32:23,196 --> 00:32:25,060
Go.
771
00:32:25,085 --> 00:32:26,341
Oh! You can't hit my face.
772
00:32:27,756 --> 00:32:29,701
One. All right. Fire!
773
00:32:36,406 --> 00:32:38,140
Oh. yes'.!
774
00:32:38,165 --> 00:32:41,221
Oh, you better go and get your
ball, babe.
775
00:32:43,476 --> 00:32:44,451
0h!
776
00:32:54,526 --> 00:32:56,221
Nice.
777
00:32:56,246 --> 00:32:57,661
Get in. Can I give up?
778
00:32:57,686 --> 00:32:58,661
Yeah. Yeah.
779
00:32:59,835 --> 00:33:01,221
Pretty exhilarating, eh?
780
00:33:01,246 --> 00:33:02,421
I enjoyed the duel.
781
00:33:02,446 --> 00:33:04,140
I want my weapons back, though.
782
00:33:04,165 --> 00:33:05,861
That's my lunch.
783
00:33:05,886 --> 00:33:08,101
APPLAUSE
784
00:33:10,606 --> 00:33:13,020
Exhilarating. Exhilarating.
785
00:33:13,045 --> 00:33:15,381
I enjoyed the formality
of the glove slap.
786
00:33:15,406 --> 00:33:17,221
Yes. Albeit with rubber gloves.
Sure.
787
00:33:17,246 --> 00:33:20,381
Then, I mean, basically,
we're looking at two grown men
788
00:33:20,406 --> 00:33:22,431
throwing fruit at each other.
789
00:33:22,456 --> 00:33:24,741
Hundreds of years of tradition
790
00:33:24,766 --> 00:33:28,631
were clearly there with a slightly
contemporary, fruity twist.
791
00:33:31,246 --> 00:33:33,301
Lovely. Yeah. But I liked that
792
00:33:33,326 --> 00:33:36,501
it followed a traditional
structure of a duel. OK.
793
00:33:36,526 --> 00:33:39,501
I'll note that down. Which brings us
on to judi.
794
00:33:39,526 --> 00:33:43,861
Hmm. Now, my observation is that
you have an incredible knack
795
00:33:43,886 --> 00:33:46,861
of normalising bad behaviour.
796
00:33:49,175 --> 00:33:52,301
In that moment, I felt inspired
by you.
797
00:33:52,326 --> 00:33:53,511
Oh, here we go.
798
00:33:55,016 --> 00:33:58,711
And I had to, you know, go full
force with what was best
799
00:33:58,736 --> 00:33:59,900
for me. For me.
800
00:33:59,925 --> 00:34:03,270
And then you shot him multiple
times.
801
00:34:03,295 --> 00:34:06,631
That's what you're supposed to do.
Whilst guzzling a cocktail, it seems.
802
00:34:06,656 --> 00:34:08,871
That was for energy purposes.
803
00:34:10,175 --> 00:34:12,661
See what I mean?
I almost think it was fair.
804
00:34:12,686 --> 00:34:15,181
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Shameless.
805
00:34:15,206 --> 00:34:17,261
Right? Who is next, please?
806
00:34:17,286 --> 00:34:20,381
Two more now, it's time for Bridget
and Chris.
807
00:34:20,406 --> 00:34:23,661
DRAMATIC FAN FARE
808
00:34:25,656 --> 00:34:27,900
Rules are simple-ish.
809
00:34:27,925 --> 00:34:29,181
You've got to be on all fours.
810
00:34:29,206 --> 00:34:33,020
You have to throw as many balls as
you can into the other player's basket.
811
00:34:33,045 --> 00:34:34,070
OK.
812
00:34:34,095 --> 00:34:36,591
DRAMATIC MUSIC
813
00:34:49,286 --> 00:34:52,150
SQUEAKING
814
00:35:04,045 --> 00:35:06,511
I've got stuck.
815
00:35:06,536 --> 00:35:07,711
WHISTLE BLOWS
816
00:35:12,925 --> 00:35:15,181
Ah! He's going to come to close.
817
00:35:15,206 --> 00:35:16,101
No! Oh, my God.
818
00:35:26,536 --> 00:35:28,351
Oh! Oh!
819
00:35:28,376 --> 00:35:30,751
HE GROANS
820
00:35:35,486 --> 00:35:36,591
Yeah!
821
00:35:37,736 --> 00:35:39,511
ROARING
822
00:35:39,536 --> 00:35:41,101
A a a ah!
823
00:35:43,975 --> 00:35:46,231
This is it. This is it. This is not
oven
824
00:35:48,136 --> 00:35:50,591
Oh! Oh! Oh!
825
00:35:54,566 --> 00:35:55,871
Oh, no. Yah.
826
00:35:55,896 --> 00:35:57,751
SHOUTING
827
00:36:05,646 --> 00:36:08,511
12, 13, 14.
828
00:36:08,536 --> 00:36:10,181
11, 12. No!
829
00:36:11,496 --> 00:36:12,830
12.
830
00:36:12,855 --> 00:36:14,311
Yes!
831
00:36:14,336 --> 00:36:16,150
You just got basketballed.
832
00:36:16,175 --> 00:36:18,441
I got basketballed.
APPLAUSE
833
00:36:20,416 --> 00:36:23,001
It may have been the white vests
that made me think you were going
834
00:36:23,026 --> 00:36:25,050
to kiss at some point.
835
00:36:25,075 --> 00:36:27,391
There's a lot of heavy panting.
836
00:36:27,416 --> 00:36:28,621
Now, was it a duel,
837
00:36:28,646 --> 00:36:30,080
that's the question? Yeah!
838
00:36:30,105 --> 00:36:32,080
There's two men going at it.
839
00:36:33,746 --> 00:36:36,441
So a game of table tennis is now
a duel, all of a sudden. Or,
840
00:36:36,466 --> 00:36:39,160
like a game of turtle ball or
whatever they were playing, I mean.
841
00:36:39,185 --> 00:36:42,030
Sorry, was there not enough
groceries involved for you?
842
00:36:44,006 --> 00:36:47,621
Bridget, I feasted my eyes
on your opening look,
843
00:36:47,646 --> 00:36:49,030
it was startling. Thank you.
844
00:36:49,055 --> 00:36:50,950
I was exhilarated briefly.
845
00:36:50,975 --> 00:36:53,251
Then, when the duel got going,
846
00:36:53,276 --> 00:36:55,851
maybe the exhilaration dropped
off a bit.
847
00:36:55,876 --> 00:37:01,421
Well, there were obviously no horses
or donkeys that I could get.
848
00:37:01,446 --> 00:37:05,211
And who hasn't craved to see
a donkey duel? Right.
849
00:37:05,236 --> 00:37:09,571
Three quarters of the first episode
has passed us by already,
850
00:37:09,596 --> 00:37:10,531
but it's not over yet.
851
00:37:10,556 --> 00:37:14,930
Soon someone will take home
an old will and a Now 24 cassette.
852
00:37:14,955 --> 00:37:17,781
We've still got it!
APPLAUSE
853
00:37:26,735 --> 00:37:29,550
Hello. Welcome back to the final
part of the show, where there
854
00:37:29,575 --> 00:37:33,060
have been several duels taking
place. Yes, I haven't done very well
855
00:37:33,085 --> 00:37:35,420
in them so far and my feet
still hurt, but there's
856
00:37:35,445 --> 00:37:38,140
one duel left. Will it be the most
exhilarating one?
857
00:37:38,165 --> 00:37:40,550
It's me again versus Sophie Duker.
858
00:37:46,455 --> 00:37:48,300
Hi, Sophie. Hi.
859
00:37:48,325 --> 00:37:51,500
Grab a weapon. These are mine?
Those are yours.
860
00:37:55,575 --> 00:37:57,070
Advance.
861
00:37:57,095 --> 00:38:00,190
DRAMATIC MUSIC
862
00:38:05,455 --> 00:38:06,430
Ah.
863
00:38:07,684 --> 00:38:08,659
I see.
864
00:38:12,735 --> 00:38:14,270
You know why I did that?
865
00:38:14,295 --> 00:38:17,550
Because the pen is mightier
than the sword, Alex.
866
00:38:17,575 --> 00:38:21,109
And the tongue is mightier
than the pen.
867
00:38:21,134 --> 00:38:25,020
All right. I'm not going to hit you
with a sword or tongue. Or a tongue?
868
00:38:25,045 --> 00:38:27,350
Or a tongue. I'm going to fight you
with words.
869
00:38:27,375 --> 00:38:28,630
There's a lot of ducks.
870
00:38:28,655 --> 00:38:30,220
Yeah, the ducks are our fans.
871
00:38:30,245 --> 00:38:31,220
Are they?
872
00:38:32,405 --> 00:38:34,430
It's duel time, baby.
873
00:38:34,455 --> 00:38:35,710
OK.
874
00:38:35,735 --> 00:38:37,580
RAPS: OK, little Alex Horne
875
00:38:37,605 --> 00:38:40,710
I'm going to defeat
you with brains, not brawn.
876
00:38:40,735 --> 00:38:43,869
I'm going to make you wish
you'd never been born,
877
00:38:43,894 --> 00:38:46,190
and leave
you feeling so forlorn.
878
00:38:46,215 --> 00:38:48,430
RAPS: OK, little Sophie Duker.
879
00:38:49,455 --> 00:38:51,430
This is going to go nuclear.
880
00:38:51,455 --> 00:38:54,070
How many verses do we have to do?
881
00:38:54,095 --> 00:38:56,940
Will one do or do you want two?
882
00:38:56,965 --> 00:38:58,840
OK, I think we need two.
883
00:38:58,865 --> 00:39:01,300
I think that's the minimum
that we have to do.
884
00:39:01,325 --> 00:39:04,230
I think we need to do two
verses, at least.
885
00:39:04,255 --> 00:39:08,200
Otherwise, our raps will seem
creased and not that good.
886
00:39:09,505 --> 00:39:10,789
My name is little Alex.
887
00:39:10,814 --> 00:39:12,070
I'm wearing a cape.
888
00:39:12,095 --> 00:39:14,909
There's only so much of
this that you can take.
889
00:39:14,934 --> 00:39:16,350
I don't use cigarettes.
890
00:39:16,375 --> 00:39:20,070
I like to vape, so you better read
that word on that tape.
891
00:39:20,095 --> 00:39:23,590
Caution, you're trying to caution
me? Well, little Alex Horne
892
00:39:23,615 --> 00:39:24,909
you're going to see.
893
00:39:24,934 --> 00:39:27,480
This rap is going to
act like a diuretic,
894
00:39:27,505 --> 00:39:30,430
because right now
you're being pretty pathetic.
895
00:39:30,455 --> 00:39:31,840
That's not very nice.
896
00:39:31,865 --> 00:39:33,590
I feel quite bad about this.
Yeah.
897
00:39:33,615 --> 00:39:35,989
I don't like threatening you.
898
00:39:36,014 --> 00:39:38,350
You, look, you're smiling
a lot. Right.
899
00:39:38,375 --> 00:39:41,789
Instead of doing this, we could
just go on a bender if you choose
900
00:39:41,814 --> 00:39:43,510
this duel to surrender.
901
00:39:43,535 --> 00:39:46,070
I'd like to surrender and not
do the duel any more
902
00:39:46,095 --> 00:39:48,560
because I can't think of any
more rhymes.
903
00:39:48,585 --> 00:39:50,869
Bender? Bender.
904
00:39:50,894 --> 00:39:52,480
APPLAUSE
Great.
905
00:39:57,455 --> 00:40:01,230
8 Mile is no longer
the definitive rap chronicle.
906
00:40:02,335 --> 00:40:05,590
I think we both, we came to a place
where we realised that violence
907
00:40:05,615 --> 00:40:06,669
was not the answer.
908
00:40:06,694 --> 00:40:08,030
It's a modern duel.
909
00:40:08,055 --> 00:40:12,360
She set it up as a duel
and she brought it bang up to date.
910
00:40:14,944 --> 00:40:16,310
I suppose she did. Yeah.
911
00:40:16,335 --> 00:40:17,749
I've never felt older.
912
00:40:20,024 --> 00:40:21,360
I'm sure we can all agree.
913
00:40:21,385 --> 00:40:23,280
A duel has got to be fair.
914
00:40:23,305 --> 00:40:25,640
Well, anyone who forces
your horrible little feet
915
00:40:25,665 --> 00:40:27,590
into roller—skates that are too
small...
916
00:40:28,694 --> 00:40:32,200
...they're going to take home one
point. Oh. One point forjudi Love.
917
00:40:32,225 --> 00:40:34,510
Oh! OK, one to Judi. Ardal.
918
00:40:34,535 --> 00:40:37,360
It was a beautiful, traditionally
set up duel, but it was not
919
00:40:37,385 --> 00:40:39,150
in any way exciting. Two points.
920
00:40:39,175 --> 00:40:42,480
OK. Bridget, three points. Right.
921
00:40:42,505 --> 00:40:43,919
It was visually exciting.
922
00:40:43,944 --> 00:40:45,749
Full stop, end of critique.
923
00:40:48,495 --> 00:40:52,869
Now, this is tough, but the truth is
I felt that Sophie's, I don't know,
924
00:40:52,894 --> 00:40:55,840
it was just bringing duel
bang up to date.
925
00:40:57,535 --> 00:40:59,390
All right, there you go.
Four points to Chris.
926
00:40:59,415 --> 00:41:00,950
Five points. Well done, Sophie
Duken
927
00:41:02,824 --> 00:41:04,640
Let's have a quick look
at the scores, shall we?
928
00:41:04,665 --> 00:41:07,360
We've got Ardal still at the foot
of the table with seven,
929
00:41:07,385 --> 00:41:11,030
and the outright leader is
still Chris with 18! Whoa!
930
00:41:14,665 --> 00:41:17,869
OK, everyone, please make your way
to the stage for the final task
931
00:41:17,894 --> 00:41:19,520
of the show!
932
00:41:19,545 --> 00:41:21,440
CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
933
00:41:27,024 --> 00:41:29,030
Hello. You sweet young prince.
934
00:41:29,055 --> 00:41:31,280
Oh, hi.
935
00:41:32,255 --> 00:41:33,879
Who's going to read the task for us?
936
00:41:33,904 --> 00:41:36,950
Sophia Duker is going to read
the task out. Good luck, Sophie.
937
00:41:36,975 --> 00:41:39,669
Thank you. Good luck with reading.
938
00:41:39,694 --> 00:41:42,879
"Count to 13 as a group, each player
taking
939
00:41:42,904 --> 00:41:46,879
"it in turns to say a number. Every
time you say an odd number,
940
00:41:46,904 --> 00:41:49,160
"you must also squat."
941
00:41:49,185 --> 00:41:50,590
Thanks.
942
00:41:50,615 --> 00:41:53,240
"Every time you say
an even number,
943
00:41:53,265 --> 00:41:54,999
"you must also jump.
944
00:41:56,625 --> 00:41:58,919
"If you make a mistake, you are out.
945
00:41:58,944 --> 00:42:02,080
"If you reach 13 or someone
is eliminated, other rules
946
00:42:02,105 --> 00:42:03,520
"will be introduced.
947
00:42:03,545 --> 00:42:05,830
"If the taskmaster thinks
you have hesitated for too long,
948
00:42:05,855 --> 00:42:08,240
"you will be eliminated."
949
00:42:08,265 --> 00:42:11,360
If you can make it reasonably
obvious what you're doing and try
950
00:42:11,385 --> 00:42:13,640
not to squat into your jump,
that can happen.
951
00:42:17,305 --> 00:42:18,520
Well, good luck, everyone.
952
00:42:18,545 --> 00:42:20,110
Ardal, please start the counting.
953
00:42:20,135 --> 00:42:21,669
OK, erm, one.
954
00:42:24,704 --> 00:42:27,799
Ardal, that's lovely. If you could do it
whilst counting, that would be great.
955
00:42:30,105 --> 00:42:32,390
I think it's your turn now, Bridget.
956
00:42:32,415 --> 00:42:35,470
So is it... So... Just a number
really. So quicker? Yes. Two.
957
00:42:35,495 --> 00:42:37,799
Yeah, but no, do it while...
Yeah, I did.
958
00:42:37,824 --> 00:42:39,110
But you were... Two. Right.
959
00:42:39,135 --> 00:42:40,210
Lovely.
960
00:42:40,235 --> 00:42:42,470
Three. Four.
961
00:42:42,495 --> 00:42:43,520
Five. Six.
962
00:42:43,545 --> 00:42:45,799
Seven. Eight.
963
00:42:45,824 --> 00:42:46,929
Nine.
964
00:42:46,954 --> 00:42:48,600
Ten. 11.
965
00:42:48,625 --> 00:42:50,650
12. 13.
966
00:42:50,675 --> 00:42:53,600
Lovely stuff, OK. Well, everyone
made it through the round.
967
00:42:53,625 --> 00:42:55,600
APPLAUSE
968
00:42:55,625 --> 00:42:59,470
OK, so we are still having the same
rules, it's still squat on odds
969
00:42:59,495 --> 00:43:02,240
and jump on evens, but now you must
salute multiples of three,
970
00:43:02,265 --> 00:43:05,470
and if you wouldn't mind pronouncing
multiples of four completely wrong.
971
00:43:06,625 --> 00:43:08,290
0h!
972
00:43:08,315 --> 00:43:10,570
Four, eight? Well, yes, yes.
973
00:43:10,595 --> 00:43:11,720
12.
974
00:43:11,745 --> 00:43:14,040
You wouldn't say eight, that
would be pronouncing it correctly.
975
00:43:14,065 --> 00:43:15,879
No, I'll say "hango". Yeah, yeah.
976
00:43:19,395 --> 00:43:21,400
OK, so, Bridget, please kick us off.
977
00:43:21,425 --> 00:43:22,679
One.
978
00:43:22,704 --> 00:43:24,400
Two. Three.
979
00:43:24,425 --> 00:43:25,600
Fa-fa-four.
980
00:43:25,625 --> 00:43:27,879
Five.
981
00:43:29,145 --> 00:43:31,160
What? Hesitation!
982
00:43:31,185 --> 00:43:33,679
APPLAUSE
Oh, my God!
983
00:43:33,704 --> 00:43:36,009
I'm fine.
984
00:43:36,034 --> 00:43:39,320
So the rules are now squat on odds,
of course, jump on even, salute
985
00:43:39,345 --> 00:43:42,840
on threes, mispronounce multiples
of fours and then all the numbers
986
00:43:42,865 --> 00:43:43,960
must be French.
987
00:43:43,985 --> 00:43:45,040
OK!
988
00:43:45,065 --> 00:43:46,960
GROANING
All the numbers must be French.
989
00:43:46,985 --> 00:43:49,290
You're going
to have to mispronounce
990
00:43:49,315 --> 00:43:50,240
quatre, for example.
991
00:43:50,265 --> 00:43:51,929
Off we go, Chris.
992
00:43:51,954 --> 00:43:53,480
Un.
993
00:43:53,505 --> 00:43:54,730
Deux.
994
00:43:54,755 --> 00:43:55,759
Trots!
995
00:43:55,784 --> 00:43:57,809
Aquatre.
996
00:43:57,834 --> 00:44:00,040
MAKES ODD NOISE
997
00:44:01,545 --> 00:44:02,650
WHISTLE BLOWS
998
00:44:02,675 --> 00:44:04,120
I'm afraid...
999
00:44:04,145 --> 00:44:06,090
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
1000
00:44:09,425 --> 00:44:10,480
It wasn't the French.
1001
00:44:10,505 --> 00:44:12,809
It wasn't French. It was the lack of
the salute.
1002
00:44:12,834 --> 00:44:14,290
Out she goes.
1003
00:44:14,315 --> 00:44:16,840
OK, so now you must spin around
when saying any numbers
1004
00:44:16,865 --> 00:44:18,559
that contain the letter T.
Oh, I'm so glad I'm out.
1005
00:44:18,584 --> 00:44:20,090
And again, that's in French.
1006
00:44:20,115 --> 00:44:22,730
God, I'm stressed and
I'm nothing to do with it.
1007
00:44:22,755 --> 00:44:25,600
OK. One of the worst clays of me
life. Yeah, so far.
1008
00:44:27,345 --> 00:44:29,240
It's Sophie.
1009
00:44:29,265 --> 00:44:31,120
Unnnnnnn.
1010
00:44:31,145 --> 00:44:33,040
Deux. Trots.
1011
00:44:33,065 --> 00:44:34,290
HE WHISTLES
1012
00:44:34,315 --> 00:44:36,730
I'm afraid there was an
unnecessary spin from Ardal.
1013
00:44:38,065 --> 00:44:39,530
So another rule, of course.
1014
00:44:39,555 --> 00:44:40,929
Oh.
1015
00:44:40,954 --> 00:44:42,400
So it's squat on odds, we know that.
1016
00:44:42,425 --> 00:44:44,730
It's jump on evens. We know that.
Salute on threes.
1017
00:44:44,755 --> 00:44:46,320
Mispronounce multiples of four.
1018
00:44:46,345 --> 00:44:49,370
All the numbers in French, spin
around if they contain the letter T
1019
00:44:49,395 --> 00:44:52,290
in French and then pretend
to be sick after saying any number
1020
00:44:52,315 --> 00:44:53,809
containing a single letter E!
1021
00:44:53,834 --> 00:44:55,480
OK, ready. Chris.
1022
00:44:55,505 --> 00:44:58,370
Off we go.
Un. Deux.
1023
00:44:58,395 --> 00:44:59,530
SHE RETCHES
1024
00:44:59,555 --> 00:45:00,889
Lovely.
1025
00:45:00,914 --> 00:45:01,889
Trots.
1026
00:45:03,995 --> 00:45:09,809
Quaaaaaa...
1027
00:45:09,834 --> 00:45:15,250
"666...
1028
00:45:15,275 --> 00:45:21,040
"666...
1029
00:45:21,065 --> 00:45:22,920
I'm trying to remember the rules.
1030
00:45:25,675 --> 00:45:27,120
Have you finished?
1031
00:45:27,145 --> 00:45:30,330
...aaatre.
APPLAUSE
1032
00:45:30,355 --> 00:45:33,090
PEEP! I'm afraid you
weren't sick at the end.
1033
00:45:33,115 --> 00:45:34,840
Aw! It's a shame.
1034
00:45:34,865 --> 00:45:36,759
SHOUTING AND APPLAUSE
I was sick!
1035
00:45:36,784 --> 00:45:39,090
I think she was meant to be sick
after the number.
1036
00:45:39,115 --> 00:45:40,809
Aw, so it's over. Oh, no.
1037
00:45:40,834 --> 00:45:41,809
Shame.
1038
00:45:44,115 --> 00:45:45,480
Why don't you come back down here
1039
00:45:45,505 --> 00:45:47,809
and we'll see how that's affected
the final score.
1040
00:45:47,834 --> 00:45:49,689
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1041
00:45:53,475 --> 00:45:55,759
More high octane stuff to finish.
1042
00:45:55,784 --> 00:45:58,090
Yes, it definitely made
counting more fun, didn't it?
1043
00:45:58,115 --> 00:45:59,769
Didn't it?
1044
00:45:59,794 --> 00:46:03,480
Ardal and Judi share last
or fourth place.
1045
00:46:03,505 --> 00:46:07,530
Sophie nearly got it, but in the end
he amassed a huge 23 points
1046
00:46:07,555 --> 00:46:09,170
and the winner of the first episode,
1047
00:46:09,195 --> 00:46:11,019
Chris Ramsey.
1048
00:46:11,044 --> 00:46:13,250
APPLAUSE
1049
00:46:14,685 --> 00:46:17,090
Chris Ramsey wins.
1050
00:46:17,115 --> 00:46:20,610
Please skip up to collect
your skip purse prizes.
1051
00:46:20,635 --> 00:46:23,330
CHEERING
1052
00:46:24,475 --> 00:46:27,920
We hope that you'll join us next
week to find out if judi Love
1053
00:46:27,945 --> 00:46:30,850
can continue to use her gift
of the gab to secure
1054
00:46:30,875 --> 00:46:32,809
herself last place.
1055
00:46:32,834 --> 00:46:35,970
It's bye for now, but also
it's well done to the first winner
1056
00:46:35,995 --> 00:46:39,100
of this series — Chris Ramsey!
1057
00:46:39,125 --> 00:46:42,280
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
1058
00:47:01,945 --> 00:47:04,460
Subtitles by Red Bee Media