1
00:00:02,014 --> 00:00:05,520
This program me contains strong
language and adult humour
2
00:00:05,545 --> 00:00:06,909
Ha-ha!
3
00:00:06,934 --> 00:00:08,400
No way!
4
00:00:10,455 --> 00:00:11,989
Erm... Gosh!
5
00:00:12,014 --> 00:00:13,270
Where's the hole?
6
00:00:14,775 --> 00:00:16,320
Blah! Urgh!
7
00:00:16,345 --> 00:00:17,960
Uhh. Are you having a laugh?
8
00:00:23,264 --> 00:00:25,190
GASPING
9
00:00:25,215 --> 00:00:27,830
APPLAUSE
10
00:00:33,095 --> 00:00:36,430
Welcome, one and all, to Taskmaster.
11
00:00:36,455 --> 00:00:38,480
This is the new Olympics
12
00:00:38,505 --> 00:00:40,789
and I am the flaming torch running
through your cities
13
00:00:40,814 --> 00:00:42,520
and igniting your passion for tasks.
14
00:00:42,545 --> 00:00:44,880
But who are these taskletes
throwing themselves into
15
00:00:44,905 --> 00:00:47,190
the competition at the direct
expense of their dignity,
16
00:00:47,215 --> 00:00:49,520
I hear you cry?
17
00:00:49,545 --> 00:00:52,630
Well, pipe down! I'll tell you.
18
00:00:52,655 --> 00:00:54,070
Wow.
19
00:00:54,095 --> 00:00:55,680
LAUGHTER
20
00:00:55,705 --> 00:00:57,960
They are Ardal O'Hanlon...
21
00:01:00,014 --> 00:01:01,680
...Bridget Christie...
22
00:01:02,985 --> 00:01:05,480
...Chris Ramsey,
23
00:01:05,505 --> 00:01:07,789
Judi Love
24
00:01:07,814 --> 00:01:10,150
and Sophie Duker.
25
00:01:13,144 --> 00:01:16,070
And next to me — he's my assistant,
he's consistent,
26
00:01:16,095 --> 00:01:18,789
persistent and his bed has
to be water resistant.
27
00:01:18,814 --> 00:01:21,159
It's little Alex Horne.
28
00:01:21,184 --> 00:01:23,430
APPLAUSE
29
00:01:23,455 --> 00:01:24,840
I'll take that.
30
00:01:26,375 --> 00:01:27,480
All right, then.
31
00:01:27,505 --> 00:01:29,039
Oh, no, what a week it's been.
32
00:01:29,064 --> 00:01:30,430
Oh, has it?
33
00:01:30,455 --> 00:01:32,919
A nightmare. Awful. Oh, gosh,
what's happened in your week?
34
00:01:32,944 --> 00:01:35,320
Well, I was shopping on the
internet, as you know I love to do.
35
00:01:35,345 --> 00:01:36,560
I know you do.
36
00:01:36,585 --> 00:01:38,989
Oh, and I accidentally clicked
"select all" on Amazon.
37
00:01:39,014 --> 00:01:41,430
I've got everything.
Bought everything.
38
00:01:41,455 --> 00:01:43,150
Disaster. I've got most of it here.
39
00:01:43,175 --> 00:01:45,480
I've got like a meat thermometer.
40
00:01:45,505 --> 00:01:48,280
Got lots of stuff, do you want to
see? Yeah, I do want to see.
41
00:01:48,305 --> 00:01:49,989
I've got like a Bunsen burner.
42
00:01:50,014 --> 00:01:53,919
Uh, got, uh, got a one-egg...
One-egg frying pan.
43
00:01:54,995 --> 00:01:56,200
Lots of stuff.
44
00:01:56,225 --> 00:01:58,510
What terrifies me about this is
you'll have thought
45
00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:00,200
of this hilarious joke. Hmm?
46
00:02:00,225 --> 00:02:02,710
And then you will have brought in
actual things from your home.
47
00:02:04,305 --> 00:02:06,999
For want of a more
sophisticated response,
48
00:02:07,024 --> 00:02:09,320
the guy's a prick.
49
00:02:09,345 --> 00:02:11,150
Right, Prize Task time.
Let's crack on.
50
00:02:11,175 --> 00:02:12,510
Yes, I suppose so,
51
00:02:12,535 --> 00:02:14,480
and I suppose the category
for episode three is
52
00:02:14,505 --> 00:02:17,640
the item that sounds funniest when
you say its name over
53
00:02:17,665 --> 00:02:19,480
and over again.
54
00:02:19,505 --> 00:02:22,249
OK? So we're going to hear some
words said quite a lot
55
00:02:22,274 --> 00:02:24,680
and I, for one, am laughing already.
56
00:02:24,705 --> 00:02:27,510
The one that tickles the Taskmaster
the most will get five points.
57
00:02:27,535 --> 00:02:29,249
Now, at the end of
the show, some lucky,
58
00:02:29,274 --> 00:02:31,610
lucky person will take home five
items that are funny
59
00:02:31,635 --> 00:02:33,150
to say their names of
lots of times.
60
00:02:33,175 --> 00:02:34,970
Right. Hello, Sophie. Hello.
61
00:02:34,995 --> 00:02:36,430
Have you brought in a funny word?
62
00:02:36,455 --> 00:02:41,330
I've brought in some perfectly
ordinary tweezers.
63
00:02:41,355 --> 00:02:43,760
Here they are. Here are the tweezers
here. There they are.
64
00:02:43,785 --> 00:02:46,999
They're tweezers for the tweezing of
a specific avian creature —
65
00:02:47,024 --> 00:02:49,510
the pheasant. Ah.
Here's the pheasant.
66
00:02:49,535 --> 00:02:52,080
She's brought that in as well.
Here's a real pheasant.
67
00:02:52,105 --> 00:02:54,690
God, they're not how
I've imagined them. Yeah.
68
00:02:54,715 --> 00:02:56,560
So they're not actually tweezers,
69
00:02:56,585 --> 00:02:58,510
they're actually
pheasant pluckers.
70
00:02:58,535 --> 00:03:00,840
And there are the pheasant pluckers.
71
00:03:00,865 --> 00:03:02,280
GROANING
72
00:03:02,305 --> 00:03:05,690
Yeah, the groan is
the correct response.
73
00:03:05,715 --> 00:03:07,080
Let's go. What, oh, you want me
to...
74
00:03:07,105 --> 00:03:08,999
You want me to say it?
The purpose of this task is
75
00:03:09,024 --> 00:03:11,360
you've brought in your funny word,
now I want to see if...
76
00:03:11,385 --> 00:03:13,049
Oh, I thought you were going
to say it. No.
77
00:03:13,074 --> 00:03:16,249
Pheasant plucker, pheasant plucker,
pheasant plucker! Pheasant plucker.
78
00:03:16,274 --> 00:03:18,520
HE BEATBOXES
He's not a pheasant plucker!
79
00:03:20,024 --> 00:03:23,410
I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it far more
than I thought I was going to.
80
00:03:23,435 --> 00:03:25,919
Chris. What's your, uh, word?
81
00:03:25,944 --> 00:03:28,890
Wow. Um, I have brought in this.
82
00:03:28,915 --> 00:03:32,640
IN NORTHERN ACCENT: And this
is a cook book.
83
00:03:34,274 --> 00:03:35,690
This is a regional response.
84
00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:37,049
Cook book.
85
00:03:37,074 --> 00:03:40,970
LAUGHTER
86
00:03:42,274 --> 00:03:44,200
It is quite good.
87
00:03:44,225 --> 00:03:46,970
I... I would argue he could
bring in most things.
88
00:03:46,995 --> 00:03:49,200
LAUGHTER
89
00:03:50,265 --> 00:03:51,690
Let's go, Chris.
90
00:03:51,715 --> 00:03:54,560
Cook book. Cook book? Cook book.
Cook book. Cook book?
91
00:03:54,585 --> 00:03:57,200
Cook book. Cook book! Cook book.
92
00:03:57,225 --> 00:03:59,560
I don't know whether it's cook...
It's not bad.
93
00:03:59,585 --> 00:04:03,360
Cook book or whether it's his cheeky
Geordie smile that's there.
94
00:04:03,385 --> 00:04:05,049
Right, Ardal, what have you
brought in?
95
00:04:05,074 --> 00:04:07,129
I've brought in bubbles!
96
00:04:07,154 --> 00:04:09,440
GREG GASPS
Yes, here they are.
97
00:04:09,465 --> 00:04:11,360
MUMBLING
98
00:04:11,385 --> 00:04:12,850
Bubbles, bubbles, bubbles.
99
00:04:12,875 --> 00:04:15,490
If you're angry, even you go,
"Bubbles!"
100
00:04:15,515 --> 00:04:18,330
Like, it's still funny and kind
of makes you less angry,
101
00:04:18,355 --> 00:04:21,520
or if you're...
If you're sad and you go, "Bubbles."
102
00:04:23,515 --> 00:04:24,720
Would you mind going through
103
00:04:24,745 --> 00:04:27,280
the full range of emotions while
you repeat the word bubbles?
104
00:04:27,305 --> 00:04:29,770
Perhaps you could start on angry
and work towards joyful.
105
00:04:29,795 --> 00:04:33,160
Let's say you can't find any crisps
or something and you go, "Bubbles!"
106
00:04:33,185 --> 00:04:34,240
Yeah. OK.
107
00:04:34,265 --> 00:04:38,610
And then you get morose and your
blood sugars go down and...
108
00:04:38,635 --> 00:04:39,850
SADLY: "Bubbles."
109
00:04:39,875 --> 00:04:42,799
LAUGHTER
110
00:04:42,824 --> 00:04:44,650
But it... It's what it conjures up!
111
00:04:44,675 --> 00:04:48,210
I mean, it conjures up children's
parties and champagne and hot tubs.
112
00:04:48,235 --> 00:04:51,290
Yeah! And, you know, sipping
champagne in the hot tub. Yes!
113
00:04:51,315 --> 00:04:53,650
And farting in the hot tub.
"More bubbles!" Yeah. Wow.
114
00:04:53,675 --> 00:04:55,929
ARDAL AND GREG: Bubbles on bubbles!
115
00:04:55,954 --> 00:04:57,410
Uh, Judi.
116
00:04:57,435 --> 00:04:58,770
Yes.
117
00:04:58,795 --> 00:05:00,129
What thing have you brought in?
118
00:05:00,154 --> 00:05:02,410
I've brought in pickles.
119
00:05:02,435 --> 00:05:04,160
Yes, a jar of pickles.
120
00:05:04,185 --> 00:05:06,029
LAUGHTER
There we go.
121
00:05:06,054 --> 00:05:08,390
So it's not a bad prize haul so far.
It's not bad.
122
00:05:08,415 --> 00:05:10,190
Who doesn't like a lovely pickle?
Exactly.
123
00:05:10,215 --> 00:05:12,909
Ah, well, I look forward to you
repeatedly saying the word pickle.
124
00:05:12,934 --> 00:05:15,470
SING-SONG: Pickle, pickle, pickle,
pickle, pickle,
125
00:05:15,495 --> 00:05:18,140
pickle, pickle, pickle,
pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle! Hmm.
126
00:05:18,165 --> 00:05:20,580
Pickle, pickle, pickle,
pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle,
127
00:05:20,605 --> 00:05:22,960
pickle, pickle, pickle,
pickle, pickle, pickle.
128
00:05:22,985 --> 00:05:25,550
Would you mind slowing... Me said
pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle,
129
00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:27,109
pickle, pickle, pickle.
130
00:05:27,134 --> 00:05:29,470
Me said pickle, pickle, pickle,
pickle, pickle, pickle,
131
00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:30,960
pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle.
132
00:05:30,985 --> 00:05:34,500
Me said I want the pickle, pickle,
pickle, pickle, pickle.
133
00:05:34,525 --> 00:05:36,859
Surely that gets
a damn point or something.
134
00:05:36,884 --> 00:05:39,320
It's got something.
It's got something!
135
00:05:40,735 --> 00:05:42,630
Bridget, you've got
your work cut out.
136
00:05:42,655 --> 00:05:44,470
Stopcock.
137
00:05:44,495 --> 00:05:48,140
Yes, she's brought, I think for the
first time in TV quiz history,
138
00:05:48,165 --> 00:05:50,470
the winner will win a stopcock.
Right.
139
00:05:50,495 --> 00:05:51,960
There it is.
140
00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:54,789
I put it to you, Bridget, that
141
00:05:54,814 --> 00:05:56,750
you've deliberately
chosen a stopcock
142
00:05:56,775 --> 00:05:58,580
because it's got the
word cock in it.
143
00:05:58,605 --> 00:06:00,989
And, therefore, you've lowered
yourself to my level.
144
00:06:01,014 --> 00:06:04,500
LAUGHTER
I want to hear stopcock repeatedly.
145
00:06:04,525 --> 00:06:08,070
Stopcock, st—stopcock, stop COCK,
stop, stopcock, stop...
146
00:06:08,095 --> 00:06:10,070
Babes, don't go on your knees.
Stopcock, stop...
147
00:06:10,095 --> 00:06:11,320
SOPHIE: No, no, no, no.
148
00:06:11,345 --> 00:06:14,830
Stopcock...
LAUGHTER DROWNS SPEECH
149
00:06:14,855 --> 00:06:19,430
Stop, stopcock! Stop, stopcock,
stop, stopcock.
150
00:06:19,455 --> 00:06:22,869
Stopcock! Stopcock!
LAUGHTER
151
00:06:22,894 --> 00:06:24,830
Stopcock.
152
00:06:24,855 --> 00:06:27,830
Stopcock! Stop, stopcock!
153
00:06:27,855 --> 00:06:29,510
STOPCOCK!
154
00:06:29,535 --> 00:06:30,940
Get back. Get back!
155
00:06:30,965 --> 00:06:33,400
Get the fire Marshall in! Stop!
156
00:06:33,425 --> 00:06:35,909
Shut the show down!
157
00:06:35,934 --> 00:06:38,270
Stopcock.
ARDAL: And now...
158
00:06:38,295 --> 00:06:40,630
And now, sorry, just to defuse the
tension in the room,
159
00:06:40,655 --> 00:06:42,580
could we all just say, "Bubbles."
160
00:06:42,605 --> 00:06:44,989
Yeah, ha-ha, ha-ha. Bubbles!
LAUGHTER
161
00:06:45,014 --> 00:06:46,989
Right, Greg. Points?
162
00:06:47,014 --> 00:06:49,320
I'm sorry, pleasant fucker
didn't do it for me.
163
00:06:49,345 --> 00:06:51,039
Pleasant fucker? Come on.
164
00:06:51,064 --> 00:06:54,630
LAUGHTER
Ah!
165
00:06:54,655 --> 00:06:56,119
Oh! Yes!
166
00:06:57,505 --> 00:06:59,760
She's got you. She got you.
167
00:06:59,785 --> 00:07:00,840
She got me. She got me good.
168
00:07:00,865 --> 00:07:03,150
I'm going to have to take her up
from bottom place.
169
00:07:03,175 --> 00:07:04,789
Ah. What? Wow.
170
00:07:04,814 --> 00:07:07,350
I'm going to give Sophie two
points. Yes, yes.
171
00:07:07,375 --> 00:07:09,960
I'm going to give cook book
and bubbles three points each.
172
00:07:09,985 --> 00:07:12,400
OK, so joint third,
we have Ardal and Chris.
173
00:07:12,425 --> 00:07:14,270
Pickles got me straight away. Mmm.
174
00:07:14,295 --> 00:07:16,590
But now I feel I was battered down
by stopcock.
175
00:07:16,615 --> 00:07:17,869
Well...
176
00:07:17,894 --> 00:07:19,400
Um, four points to stopcock.
177
00:07:19,425 --> 00:07:21,840
Pickles was a pure attempt.
She takes the five.
178
00:07:21,865 --> 00:07:23,119
Five points to judi Love.
179
00:07:23,144 --> 00:07:24,590
Right, we're off.
180
00:07:26,585 --> 00:07:28,869
Right. What's first, Alex?
181
00:07:28,894 --> 00:07:31,200
Well, the cast are going to teach
you a lesson, Greg.
182
00:07:31,225 --> 00:07:33,560
A history lesson. Ooh.
183
00:07:46,894 --> 00:07:48,119
Hello.
184
00:07:48,144 --> 00:07:50,710
Oh, hello, judi. Hello, Sophie.
185
00:07:50,735 --> 00:07:53,350
Hello, Alex.
186
00:07:53,375 --> 00:07:54,919
You look nice. Pardon?
187
00:07:54,944 --> 00:07:56,590
You look nice.
SHE MUMBLES
188
00:07:56,615 --> 00:07:58,590
You've never said that before.
Thank you.
189
00:07:58,615 --> 00:07:59,869
I've never thought it before.
190
00:07:59,894 --> 00:08:02,680
I'm very good at finding
the actual task.
191
00:08:03,814 --> 00:08:08,230
"Accurately and emotionally recreate
a great moment from history."
192
00:08:08,255 --> 00:08:10,119
"Using these two traffic cones."
193
00:08:12,095 --> 00:08:14,869
"Most accurate and emotional
recreation wins."
194
00:08:14,894 --> 00:08:17,150
"You've got 30 minutes."
195
00:08:17,175 --> 00:08:19,119
"Your time starts now."
196
00:08:19,144 --> 00:08:21,070
Oh, my God.
197
00:08:21,095 --> 00:08:22,590
You know your history?
198
00:08:22,615 --> 00:08:25,039
It's just everything that's not now,
isn't it?
199
00:08:26,894 --> 00:08:29,430
Ahh. Something from history.
200
00:08:29,455 --> 00:08:30,840
Joan of Arc.
201
00:08:30,865 --> 00:08:33,360
Martin Luther King or...
202
00:08:33,385 --> 00:08:34,590
I'm free.
203
00:08:37,745 --> 00:08:40,999
I was thinking about doing
the moment from the VMAs.
204
00:08:41,024 --> 00:08:44,200
Maybe you be Janet Jackson
and I'll be Justin Timberlake.
205
00:08:44,225 --> 00:08:45,950
With the malfunction? Yeah.
206
00:08:45,975 --> 00:08:48,280
That was a big moment.
That was a big moment.
207
00:08:48,305 --> 00:08:50,560
Oh, I've got it. Ah.
208
00:08:50,585 --> 00:08:51,999
I'm going to need some props.
209
00:08:54,824 --> 00:08:56,150
Oh, I see what you mean.
210
00:08:56,175 --> 00:08:57,360
Yeah.
211
00:08:57,385 --> 00:08:59,590
LAUGHTER
212
00:09:02,694 --> 00:09:07,119
History by your definition is
everything that's not now.
213
00:09:07,144 --> 00:09:10,840
But that... That's history now.
What you just said is as well, now.
214
00:09:10,865 --> 00:09:13,200
I mean... I mean...
Is it everything that's not now?
215
00:09:13,225 --> 00:09:16,280
It's... It's not, no.
History is recorded past.
216
00:09:16,305 --> 00:09:18,230
History is recorded past?
217
00:09:18,255 --> 00:09:19,799
Yeah. OK.
218
00:09:19,824 --> 00:09:21,560
You get prehistory, which is
before that.
219
00:09:21,585 --> 00:09:22,999
Prehistoric.
220
00:09:23,024 --> 00:09:24,640
Hmm. That's why it's called that.
221
00:09:24,665 --> 00:09:26,560
LAUGHTER
222
00:09:26,585 --> 00:09:30,049
It's... You just learn.
You're always learning.
223
00:09:30,074 --> 00:09:32,440
Shall we crack on
and see which emotional parts
224
00:09:32,465 --> 00:09:34,160
of history they've decided
to represent?
225
00:09:34,185 --> 00:09:35,520
Yeah, I should say, it's not...
226
00:09:35,545 --> 00:09:37,879
The part of history didn't
need to be emotional,
227
00:09:37,904 --> 00:09:39,669
it's the recreation had
to be emotional. Oh.
228
00:09:39,694 --> 00:09:41,129
And accurate, just so we know.
229
00:09:41,154 --> 00:09:43,080
All right, well,
we're going to start with
230
00:09:43,105 --> 00:09:44,919
the oldest person here
by quite a bit,
231
00:09:44,944 --> 00:09:46,950
so he has a clear
advantage from the off.
232
00:09:46,975 --> 00:09:50,160
It's Ardal O'Hanlon's recreation.
Here we go.
233
00:09:50,185 --> 00:09:52,919
DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS
234
00:09:52,944 --> 00:09:55,160
IMITATION GUNFIRE
235
00:09:56,385 --> 00:09:57,720
WHOOSHING NOISES
236
00:09:57,745 --> 00:09:59,160
HE IMITATES AIRCRAFT
237
00:09:59,185 --> 00:10:00,310
IMITATION EXPLOSIONS
238
00:10:00,335 --> 00:10:01,770
We must fight back!
239
00:10:01,795 --> 00:10:03,669
IMITATION GUNFIRE
240
00:10:03,694 --> 00:10:06,320
Yes! The Germans,
they're turning around!
241
00:10:06,345 --> 00:10:08,850
HE ROARS
242
00:10:11,105 --> 00:10:14,129
HE CHEERS
243
00:10:15,235 --> 00:10:16,929
Let's see what's on the radio.
244
00:10:16,954 --> 00:10:18,770
HE GURGLES
245
00:10:18,795 --> 00:10:21,030
HE RANTS INDISTINCTLY
246
00:10:21,055 --> 00:10:24,129
# It's a long way to Tipperary
247
00:10:24,154 --> 00:10:27,879
# It's a long way to go! #
248
00:10:27,904 --> 00:10:29,799
HE SIGHS
249
00:10:29,824 --> 00:10:32,080
Thank you, Ardal, I've learnt a lot.
250
00:10:32,105 --> 00:10:33,290
Thank you.
251
00:10:33,315 --> 00:10:36,290
APPLAUSE
252
00:10:38,345 --> 00:10:42,960
It looked to me like
a seven-year-old boy shouting
253
00:10:42,985 --> 00:10:45,240
and playing army by himself.
254
00:10:45,265 --> 00:10:46,520
LAUGHTER
255
00:10:46,545 --> 00:10:47,999
Oh!
256
00:10:48,024 --> 00:10:51,650
I mean, I... You're usually very
fair, but on this occasion...
257
00:10:51,675 --> 00:10:53,650
THEY LAUGH
258
00:10:53,675 --> 00:10:55,650
Next, we're going
a bit further back in time,
259
00:10:55,675 --> 00:10:58,879
with Sophie Duker showing off one
of her many voices. Here we go.
260
00:10:58,904 --> 00:11:00,320
CROAKING AND RUMBLING
261
00:11:00,345 --> 00:11:02,129
Daddy, what's that sound?
262
00:11:02,154 --> 00:11:04,799
It sounds like the Earth is hungry.
GRUMBLING
263
00:11:04,824 --> 00:11:07,129
I can't hear anything.
264
00:11:07,154 --> 00:11:11,009
Achoo! Everything smells like eggs,
Daddy. What's going on?
265
00:11:11,034 --> 00:11:13,080
Nothing to worry about.
266
00:11:13,105 --> 00:11:16,520
You told me yesterday that the
dinosaurs would live forever
267
00:11:16,545 --> 00:11:21,160
and ever and ever and never go
extinct. Is that true?
268
00:11:21,185 --> 00:11:22,770
That's true.
269
00:11:25,034 --> 00:11:26,600
RUMBLING
270
00:11:26,625 --> 00:11:28,850
DEEP GURGLING
271
00:11:29,795 --> 00:11:31,129
Arghg
272
00:11:31,154 --> 00:11:32,490
Daddy!
273
00:11:33,545 --> 00:11:35,009
Daddy!
274
00:11:35,034 --> 00:11:36,960
You're on fire!
275
00:11:36,985 --> 00:11:38,730
Ahh.
276
00:11:38,755 --> 00:11:40,160
What's happening, Daddy?
277
00:11:40,185 --> 00:11:43,129
You look like you're
in unimaginable amounts of pain.
278
00:11:43,154 --> 00:11:44,570
Ahhh.
279
00:11:44,595 --> 00:11:47,929
Don't leave me, Daddy. No. No!
280
00:11:47,954 --> 00:11:50,770
Ahhh. Oh, God!
281
00:11:50,795 --> 00:11:52,160
No!
282
00:11:52,185 --> 00:11:55,520
APPLAUSE
283
00:11:57,235 --> 00:12:00,490
A very... A very ambitious
application of the use of the cones.
284
00:12:00,515 --> 00:12:02,450
Yeah. A lot of digital
stuff, though.
285
00:12:02,475 --> 00:12:05,040
I don't know about the use of the
cones. just had to get that in.
286
00:12:05,065 --> 00:12:06,450
Yep. Wow.
287
00:12:06,475 --> 00:12:08,809
But can I just say, can I...
can I just add I think that is
288
00:12:08,834 --> 00:12:13,170
a fantastic moment, Sophie, from
prehistory. I think it's wonderful.
289
00:12:13,195 --> 00:12:15,490
What! OK. All right.
290
00:12:15,515 --> 00:12:18,889
I just...
LAUGHTER
291
00:12:18,914 --> 00:12:20,400
No.
292
00:12:20,425 --> 00:12:22,320
The man makes a good point and I...
This, no...
293
00:12:22,345 --> 00:12:23,850
And I've only learnt this today.
294
00:12:23,875 --> 00:12:26,170
We only learnt this today.
295
00:12:26,195 --> 00:12:29,530
Well, we-we-we could debate whether
it's history or not for a long time.
296
00:12:29,555 --> 00:12:33,040
I'll make a snap decision,
fair or not, within minutes.
297
00:12:33,065 --> 00:12:34,530
THEY LAUGH
298
00:12:34,555 --> 00:12:36,889
But now let's drill down into
the narrative.
299
00:12:36,914 --> 00:12:39,500
I enjoyed the SFX.
I enjoyed the bubbling lava. Mm.
300
00:12:39,525 --> 00:12:42,960
The only thing I question is
the characters within the piece.
301
00:12:42,985 --> 00:12:46,370
Yeah. I wonder why your character
was, dare I say it,
302
00:12:46,395 --> 00:12:48,170
a little irritating.
303
00:12:48,195 --> 00:12:49,450
SHE LAUGHS
304
00:12:49,475 --> 00:12:53,090
I just... I didn't want it
to be too, too sad.
305
00:12:53,115 --> 00:12:55,889
Tick. Cos it's, yeah, OK.
No, it was, it was very sad.
306
00:12:55,914 --> 00:12:58,500
But, I mean, like,
I think everyone here,
307
00:12:58,525 --> 00:13:01,500
whether they're a dinosaur or not,
has a fear of going extinct.
308
00:13:01,525 --> 00:13:03,929
I just found with that
character, I sort of was glad
309
00:13:03,954 --> 00:13:05,450
she was getting made extinct.
310
00:13:05,475 --> 00:13:08,450
DRUMMING
311
00:13:11,885 --> 00:13:14,170
You heard the drums!
It's the end of part one.
312
00:13:14,195 --> 00:13:15,970
APPLAUSE
313
00:13:26,565 --> 00:13:28,980
APPLAUSE
314
00:13:29,005 --> 00:13:30,110
Hello, again.
315
00:13:30,135 --> 00:13:33,980
Welcome back to Taskmaster,
where we are time travelling.
316
00:13:34,005 --> 00:13:35,310
Ooh, we certainly are.
317
00:13:35,335 --> 00:13:37,029
Our five comics have been busy
318
00:13:37,054 --> 00:13:39,620
recreating moments in history
using two traffic cones.
319
00:13:39,645 --> 00:13:44,260
Now it's time for a bit of unnatural
history with Dr Chris Ramsey.
320
00:13:44,285 --> 00:13:45,620
Hmm.
Good day.
321
00:13:45,645 --> 00:13:48,750
You join me on a historic day
for myself and everyone in my field.
322
00:13:48,775 --> 00:13:51,949
I am a scientist from
Edinburgh University and today,
323
00:13:51,974 --> 00:13:53,390
we finally did it.
324
00:13:53,415 --> 00:13:56,340
The first time we've cloned from
an adult somatic cell
325
00:13:56,365 --> 00:13:58,260
using nuclear transfer,
326
00:13:58,285 --> 00:13:59,980
we've cloned a sheep.
327
00:14:02,245 --> 00:14:03,699
This is Dolly the Sheep.
328
00:14:03,724 --> 00:14:05,699
Didn't name that one.
No-one gives a shit.
329
00:14:05,724 --> 00:14:08,029
This is Dolly the Sheep that
we've cloned.
330
00:14:08,054 --> 00:14:09,550
Have we gone too far?
331
00:14:09,575 --> 00:14:11,829
SOMBRE MUSIC PLAYS
332
00:14:11,854 --> 00:14:12,860
Has science gone too far?
333
00:14:12,885 --> 00:14:14,310
Should I be playing god?
334
00:14:14,335 --> 00:14:15,500
I don't know.
335
00:14:19,005 --> 00:14:20,699
HE SOBS
336
00:14:22,525 --> 00:14:26,340
APPLAUSE
337
00:14:26,365 --> 00:14:27,750
Nice.
338
00:14:29,054 --> 00:14:30,470
The cloning of Dolly the Sheep.
339
00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:32,500
Because the cones were the same.
340
00:14:32,525 --> 00:14:33,829
Oh, I see. Identical, them.
341
00:14:33,854 --> 00:14:36,140
Yeah, yeah, they were.
Stuck some cotton wool on 'em,
342
00:14:36,165 --> 00:14:38,140
job's a good 'un. Um...
343
00:14:38,165 --> 00:14:41,190
But I... I seem to remember that
Dolly had a head.
344
00:14:41,215 --> 00:14:43,140
LAUGHTER
345
00:14:43,165 --> 00:14:46,699
Sorry, sorry, are you claiming that
your cone looked more like
346
00:14:46,724 --> 00:14:51,350
a tank than mine looked
like a sheep?
347
00:14:51,375 --> 00:14:53,990
I've never seen
a cylindrical sheep, I just...
348
00:14:55,415 --> 00:14:56,630
Right. So it was...
349
00:14:56,655 --> 00:14:58,670
It was inaccurate, but it was
emotional —
350
00:14:58,695 --> 00:15:00,990
is that what we're saying?
He definitely was emotional.
351
00:15:01,015 --> 00:15:02,270
Mm-hm. Yeah.
352
00:15:02,295 --> 00:15:04,909
I just don't remember on the task
where it said about emotional.
353
00:15:04,934 --> 00:15:07,990
What... That statement makes me
look forward to yours
354
00:15:08,015 --> 00:15:10,390
more than you can imagine.
Who's next?
355
00:15:10,415 --> 00:15:12,709
Uh, it's time for
a bit of Bridget Chr—istory.
356
00:15:12,734 --> 00:15:13,860
SHE SNIGGERS
357
00:15:17,575 --> 00:15:19,959
LO-Fl MUSIC PLAYS
358
00:15:21,804 --> 00:15:24,140
IN RUSSIAN ACCENT: It is Day Three
in the capsule.
359
00:15:25,934 --> 00:15:29,430
It's quite lonely here
but trying to keep my nerve
360
00:15:29,455 --> 00:15:33,750
because if I panic, I don't have
really have anywhere to go.
361
00:15:37,655 --> 00:15:42,070
My heart is beating, but you know
however frightened I get,
362
00:15:42,095 --> 00:15:46,680
I keep telling myself that
I have just orbited the Earth
363
00:15:46,705 --> 00:15:49,400
and, you know, not many people from
my socio-economic background
364
00:15:49,425 --> 00:15:52,829
get to orbit a nice ball,
let alone Earth.
365
00:15:54,215 --> 00:15:56,500
I just need to be brave.
366
00:15:56,525 --> 00:16:01,150
I would think of my mother, but I'm
a stray, so I don't have mother.
367
00:16:03,064 --> 00:16:07,760
My name is Laika, and, now,
I'm ready to die.
368
00:16:07,785 --> 00:16:10,990
APPLAUSE
369
00:16:12,295 --> 00:16:14,579
Yeah? Yeah, a little one. Wow!
just a...
370
00:16:14,604 --> 00:16:16,510
LAUGHTER
371
00:16:16,535 --> 00:16:19,270
Street dog, no mother,
and sent up to burn.
372
00:16:19,295 --> 00:16:21,230
SIGHING
373
00:16:21,255 --> 00:16:23,510
Was that why you put a pot lid...
374
00:16:23,535 --> 00:16:26,070
LAUGHTER
375
00:16:26,095 --> 00:16:27,550
It's all I had.
376
00:16:27,575 --> 00:16:29,909
What was the name of
the dog, Laiko? Laika. Laika.
377
00:16:29,934 --> 00:16:31,510
What did happen to Laika?
378
00:16:31,535 --> 00:16:32,940
It's exactly that.
379
00:16:32,965 --> 00:16:35,589
One orbit and then died
from the heat.
380
00:16:35,614 --> 00:16:38,190
Oh, no. Poor Laika! I did like her.
381
00:16:38,215 --> 00:16:40,430
LAUGHTER
382
00:16:43,175 --> 00:16:45,680
A fitting tribute.
383
00:16:45,705 --> 00:16:49,070
I'm just a bit, like,
overwhelmed with, like, like,
384
00:16:49,095 --> 00:16:52,589
how much props and digital stuff
everybody else...
385
00:16:52,614 --> 00:16:54,630
CHRIS GU FFAWS
386
00:16:54,655 --> 00:16:57,120
Judi, I cannot wait to see yours.
387
00:16:58,705 --> 00:17:00,990
Well, here we go, then.
It's the return of the ju-di.
388
00:17:01,015 --> 00:17:02,350
The j-j... The... The judi.
389
00:17:02,375 --> 00:17:05,310
EPIC ENTRANCE MUSIC PLAYS
390
00:17:10,535 --> 00:17:13,150
BIRDS SQUAWK
391
00:17:13,175 --> 00:17:16,630
MYSTERIOUS ADVENTURE MUSIC PLAYS
392
00:17:16,655 --> 00:17:18,039
That's how they did it.
393
00:17:30,814 --> 00:17:33,280
EPIC CRESCENDO
394
00:17:35,064 --> 00:17:36,480
What is it?
395
00:17:36,505 --> 00:17:38,000
It's the pyramids.
396
00:17:38,025 --> 00:17:41,430
I'm an Egyptian queen
and I've built pyramids.
397
00:17:45,255 --> 00:17:48,789
Thanks, judi. Oh, what's your name?
398
00:17:48,814 --> 00:17:50,000
Nefertiti.
399
00:17:53,505 --> 00:17:54,870
Yeah? Yeah.
400
00:17:54,895 --> 00:17:56,200
Thanks.
401
00:17:58,505 --> 00:18:01,310
APPLAUSE
402
00:18:02,425 --> 00:18:05,150
Yeah, I can see why you were
so vocal during the others.
403
00:18:05,175 --> 00:18:08,070
Well, it's just...it's an emotional
thing for me, you know?
404
00:18:08,095 --> 00:18:10,870
If you say to me, as a black
woman, tell us about your history,
405
00:18:10,895 --> 00:18:12,839
I mean, hmm! Dark road, isn't it?
406
00:18:12,864 --> 00:18:14,870
Do you know who built...
built the pyramids?
407
00:18:14,895 --> 00:18:17,430
Wait, they didn't ask about it.
They just...
408
00:18:17,455 --> 00:18:19,950
I'm just saying you sort of
glamorised slavery there.
409
00:18:19,975 --> 00:18:21,200
That's what you...
410
00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:23,230
You wanted emotion, right?
411
00:18:23,255 --> 00:18:24,400
Yeah.
412
00:18:24,425 --> 00:18:26,839
WAVERINGLY: And that...
Those two cones up there...
413
00:18:26,864 --> 00:18:28,120
There we go.
414
00:18:28,145 --> 00:18:31,760
...really demonstrated heartache —
415
00:18:31,785 --> 00:18:34,120
like Sophie's just said.
416
00:18:36,785 --> 00:18:42,080
And the fact that my art draws
the emotion after I've done it,
417
00:18:42,105 --> 00:18:46,390
with just simple sand,
418
00:18:46,415 --> 00:18:49,260
and a fucking crown...
419
00:18:49,285 --> 00:18:51,569
What else do you need?
GREG CHUCKLES
420
00:18:51,594 --> 00:18:53,850
I tell you what you need, one point.
421
00:18:53,875 --> 00:18:56,140
LAUGHTER
422
00:18:56,165 --> 00:18:58,819
And you can thank me for it.
423
00:18:58,844 --> 00:19:00,260
Fucking rubbish!
424
00:19:00,285 --> 00:19:02,500
LAUGHTER
425
00:19:05,955 --> 00:19:07,819
One to judi. Two...
426
00:19:07,844 --> 00:19:08,819
I'm sorry.
427
00:19:08,844 --> 00:19:10,290
I wasn't moved by Dolly the Sheep.
428
00:19:10,315 --> 00:19:12,649
I'm sorry, Chris,
I've given you two.
429
00:19:12,674 --> 00:19:15,569
Even though it was prehistory
and the dinosaur was annoying,
430
00:19:15,594 --> 00:19:19,220
I'm giving Sophie three points
because of the ambition of it.
431
00:19:19,245 --> 00:19:22,540
Because playing army by himself
brought about
432
00:19:22,565 --> 00:19:24,899
such an emotional
reaction in Ardal...
433
00:19:24,924 --> 00:19:27,260
I cried for you!
..I'm giving him four points.
434
00:19:27,285 --> 00:19:29,620
Four points to Ardal O'Hanlon.
And I'm standing by it.
435
00:19:29,645 --> 00:19:32,029
Can't believe it. I don't think
anyone will argue with me —
436
00:19:32,054 --> 00:19:34,699
five sweet, sweet points go to
the emotional recreation of
437
00:19:34,724 --> 00:19:37,390
the loss of Laika the Dog.
And that's an end to it!
438
00:19:37,415 --> 00:19:39,260
Bridget Christie gets all five.
439
00:19:42,365 --> 00:19:45,750
Right, let's have a look
at the controversial scoreboard.
440
00:19:45,775 --> 00:19:48,060
Bridget is in the lead
with nine points!
441
00:19:48,085 --> 00:19:50,300
APPLAUSE
442
00:19:54,165 --> 00:19:55,579
Let's have another one.
443
00:19:55,604 --> 00:19:57,860
And it's good news —
it's an annoying task!
444
00:20:13,215 --> 00:20:16,190
Ooh! Gosh.
445
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:17,940
Hi, Alex.
446
00:20:17,965 --> 00:20:19,579
Toys.
447
00:20:19,604 --> 00:20:21,270
You like toys? I do like toys.
448
00:20:21,295 --> 00:20:23,220
Can I?
449
00:20:23,245 --> 00:20:26,190
Anything you want to say
to me about this task?
450
00:20:26,215 --> 00:20:28,060
No.
451
00:20:28,085 --> 00:20:31,579
"Make a..." Oh, God. Oh, God. OK.
452
00:20:31,604 --> 00:20:34,860
"Make all of these things
happen at the same time."
453
00:20:34,885 --> 00:20:37,220
"The monsters must be squatting."
454
00:20:39,045 --> 00:20:41,340
"The robot must be walking."
455
00:20:41,365 --> 00:20:44,990
ALL, OVERLAPPING: The marble
must be rolling.
456
00:20:45,015 --> 00:20:47,300
CHRIS &jUD|: The cradle
must be clicking.
457
00:20:47,325 --> 00:20:51,220
ALL: The sand must be falling.
458
00:20:51,245 --> 00:20:53,659
CHRIS 81 ARDAL: The fidget spinner
must be spinning.
459
00:20:53,684 --> 00:20:56,140
SOPHIE: The candles must be...
ALL: ..out.
460
00:20:56,165 --> 00:20:58,470
BOTH: You must applaud when you
think you've finished.
461
00:20:58,495 --> 00:21:00,060
ALL: Fastest wins.
462
00:21:00,085 --> 00:21:01,300
Time starts now.
463
00:21:01,325 --> 00:21:03,630
APPLAUSE
464
00:21:06,575 --> 00:21:08,940
And I found just the task itself
to be irritating.
465
00:21:08,965 --> 00:21:10,140
Yes, yes. Um...
466
00:21:10,165 --> 00:21:11,550
Let's crack on, I say. Off we go.
467
00:21:11,575 --> 00:21:14,940
OK. We're going to start
with three of them, A, B, C —
468
00:21:14,965 --> 00:21:18,709
Ardal, Bridget and Sophie with a C.
Here we go.
469
00:21:18,734 --> 00:21:22,300
SING-SONG: OK, so, how do
you make this guy walk?
470
00:21:22,325 --> 00:21:24,860
How do you make him walk?
471
00:21:24,885 --> 00:21:27,630
OK, I'm going to start with this
guy. Wait, where's, where's the...
472
00:21:27,655 --> 00:21:29,190
Where's the, where's the hole?!
473
00:21:43,405 --> 00:21:45,630
OK, what is it... OK. OK!
474
00:21:49,325 --> 00:21:50,630
Oh, great.
475
00:21:50,655 --> 00:21:52,020
OK, stop.
476
00:21:55,655 --> 00:21:56,940
HE LAUGHS
477
00:21:59,814 --> 00:22:01,430
Why were you saying stop?
478
00:22:01,455 --> 00:22:04,350
Because everything was happening
that was supposed to.
479
00:22:04,375 --> 00:22:06,630
Have you read the task properly?
480
00:22:06,655 --> 00:22:07,740
I don't know.
481
00:22:10,765 --> 00:22:12,630
OK, I'm going to sit on these.
Right.
482
00:22:14,405 --> 00:22:16,070
Squatting.
483
00:22:16,095 --> 00:22:17,510
We have three squatters.
484
00:22:17,535 --> 00:22:19,510
Three squatters. Two squatters.
485
00:22:19,535 --> 00:22:22,070
You stay, or I'll smash you
to pieces!
486
00:22:23,734 --> 00:22:25,509
I've not got long left on
the candles.
487
00:22:28,054 --> 00:22:33,339
Out, clicking, spinning, rolling.
488
00:22:33,364 --> 00:22:35,149
I've stopped the clock.
489
00:22:35,174 --> 00:22:36,509
SHE SIGHS
490
00:22:38,773 --> 00:22:40,079
AUDIENCE OOHS
491
00:22:49,414 --> 00:22:50,909
He's still going. Yeah!
492
00:22:56,364 --> 00:22:57,878
Argh.
493
00:23:00,184 --> 00:23:04,878
Just imagine that if you don't do
this, someone will take my cat.
494
00:23:12,214 --> 00:23:15,029
It's these, it's these.
I hate these!
495
00:23:22,773 --> 00:23:25,189
It's OK. It's all OK.
496
00:23:25,214 --> 00:23:27,189
APPLAUSE
497
00:23:31,624 --> 00:23:34,159
Well, it seemed to me that
the only person who had
498
00:23:34,184 --> 00:23:35,668
any kind of system was Sophie.
499
00:23:35,693 --> 00:23:38,159
She at least tried to stand on
the jumpy-up things.
500
00:23:38,184 --> 00:23:39,389
Yeah, that was clever.
501
00:23:39,414 --> 00:23:41,748
I sensed blind panic in you two.
You may disagree...
502
00:23:41,773 --> 00:23:43,548
Not at all. I was glad
I couldn't do it.
503
00:23:43,573 --> 00:23:46,469
LAUGHTER
504
00:23:46,494 --> 00:23:49,069
You generated some nice quotes for
the Taskmaster quote book.
505
00:23:49,094 --> 00:23:51,599
"You stay or I'll smash you
to pieces."
506
00:23:51,624 --> 00:23:55,469
"Just imagine, if you don't do this,
someone will take my cat."
507
00:23:57,573 --> 00:24:00,239
Alex asked Ardal why he'd stopped
and he said,
508
00:24:00,264 --> 00:24:01,709
and I think I'm quoting here,
509
00:24:01,734 --> 00:24:04,798
"Because everything was
happening like it was supposed to."
510
00:24:04,823 --> 00:24:07,109
THEY LAUGH
511
00:24:07,134 --> 00:24:10,239
And then within minutes of that, he
and the robot were both lying
512
00:24:10,264 --> 00:24:11,829
on the floor kicking their legs.
513
00:24:11,854 --> 00:24:13,829
GREG CHUCKLES
514
00:24:13,854 --> 00:24:15,039
Obviously, we all...
515
00:24:15,064 --> 00:24:18,319
There was at least one thing that we
didn't manage to get.
516
00:24:18,344 --> 00:24:20,748
Well, there was definitely
for you, yes. Hmm.
517
00:24:20,773 --> 00:24:23,239
Bridget seemed to find her groove
towards the end, though.
518
00:24:23,264 --> 00:24:25,599
It's worth having another look at
Bridget cos it...
519
00:24:25,624 --> 00:24:28,469
She was so close, we had to look at
it frame by frame at the end.
520
00:24:28,494 --> 00:24:31,109
Wow. It's whether or not
the monster is squatting
521
00:24:31,134 --> 00:24:33,069
when everything else is happening.
522
00:24:38,903 --> 00:24:42,628
Click. It does click.
523
00:24:42,653 --> 00:24:44,159
Click. Yeah.
524
00:24:44,184 --> 00:24:45,909
CHRIS: It's a blur, innit?
525
00:24:45,934 --> 00:24:47,439
SOPHIE: But it's up, it's up.
526
00:24:47,464 --> 00:24:49,039
JUDI: Yeah, it clicked.
527
00:24:49,064 --> 00:24:51,349
BRIDGET: Look, it's clicking.
I thought it was the...
528
00:24:51,374 --> 00:24:53,239
It's that blur when it first clicks.
529
00:24:53,264 --> 00:24:55,709
It blurs like it's about...
GREG: God, that blur is so...
530
00:24:55,734 --> 00:24:58,239
But, Bridget, she didn't lie down on
the ground at the end.
531
00:24:58,264 --> 00:25:00,798
The blur is weighing
so heavy on my mind.
532
00:25:00,823 --> 00:25:03,119
OVERLAPPING SPEECH
It was so mean.
533
00:25:03,144 --> 00:25:04,349
No, but it's up to him. Oh!
534
00:25:04,374 --> 00:25:06,839
God, the blur!
535
00:25:06,864 --> 00:25:08,479
I'm going to allow it.
536
00:25:08,504 --> 00:25:10,399
She's done it! She's done it.
537
00:25:10,424 --> 00:25:13,239
ROARING APPLAUSE
538
00:25:14,783 --> 00:25:17,199
Right, let's have a break!
539
00:25:17,224 --> 00:25:18,399
You're suffocating me.
540
00:25:18,424 --> 00:25:20,069
I need to try and work out who I am.
541
00:25:20,094 --> 00:25:23,628
There can't be an us until I find
me. Surely you understand that!
542
00:25:23,653 --> 00:25:25,319
Yes. See you in a bit.
543
00:25:25,344 --> 00:25:26,839
APPLAUSE
544
00:25:32,593 --> 00:25:33,979
APPLAUSE
545
00:25:34,004 --> 00:25:35,339
Hello!
546
00:25:35,364 --> 00:25:39,159
We're back again and so is he!
547
00:25:39,184 --> 00:25:43,209
Coo—ee! Before the break,
a plate-spinning task had begun.
548
00:25:43,234 --> 00:25:45,698
The object is to get seven things
happening at the same time.
549
00:25:45,723 --> 00:25:47,289
Monsters squatting, robot walking,
550
00:25:47,314 --> 00:25:49,648
marble rolling, cradle clicking,
sand falling,
551
00:25:49,673 --> 00:25:52,009
fidget spinner spinning
and candles snuffed.
552
00:25:52,034 --> 00:25:54,409
Bridget is the only one
who's done it so far.
553
00:25:54,434 --> 00:25:57,089
Now there are only two people
left that can do it.
554
00:25:57,114 --> 00:26:01,089
It's time for judi and Chris to look
silly with some toys. Here we go.
555
00:26:01,114 --> 00:26:03,409
The candles must be out.
556
00:26:03,434 --> 00:26:05,729
So what happens if
I blow them out now?
557
00:26:05,754 --> 00:26:06,768
They'll be out.
558
00:26:14,723 --> 00:26:16,289
So that's one bit done.
559
00:26:16,314 --> 00:26:18,648
How are the marbles supposed
to roll?
560
00:26:18,673 --> 00:26:21,729
How's a marble supposed to roll?
How's a marble supposed to roll?
561
00:26:21,754 --> 00:26:22,979
How long will that go for?
562
00:26:26,284 --> 00:26:28,239
OK. OK. OK!
563
00:26:28,264 --> 00:26:30,059
You bastards are going last.
564
00:26:32,114 --> 00:26:33,419
Oh, this is ridiculous.
565
00:26:33,444 --> 00:26:36,889
This is ridiculous.
This is ridiculous.
566
00:26:36,914 --> 00:26:39,448
This I can do for quite a while cos
I've got one in the house.
567
00:26:39,473 --> 00:26:41,698
OK, I think I've got this. Yeah.
568
00:26:43,004 --> 00:26:44,249
Right, I think I've got this.
569
00:26:47,553 --> 00:26:50,929
Ah! I think I've got this. Yep.
570
00:26:52,164 --> 00:26:53,339
OK, OK.
571
00:26:53,364 --> 00:26:55,619
OK, OK, OK.
572
00:26:55,644 --> 00:26:57,139
Hold on, hold on.
573
00:26:57,164 --> 00:26:58,979
I've got this, hold on,
574
00:26:59,004 --> 00:27:00,889
Hold on. I think I've got this.
Hold on.
575
00:27:00,914 --> 00:27:02,249
Oh, God.
576
00:27:02,274 --> 00:27:04,859
Have you got this?
I think so. Hold on.
577
00:27:04,884 --> 00:27:06,729
OK.
578
00:27:18,084 --> 00:27:19,859
I've stopped the clock.
579
00:27:19,884 --> 00:27:21,729
APPLAUSE
580
00:27:28,964 --> 00:27:30,339
It's looking good.
581
00:27:35,603 --> 00:27:38,419
I think I had that.
I think I had that.
582
00:27:38,444 --> 00:27:41,249
I think I've smashed that task,
to be honest with you.
583
00:27:41,274 --> 00:27:43,219
LAUGHTER
584
00:27:43,244 --> 00:27:45,578
Thanks, bye. Bye, judi.
585
00:27:49,114 --> 00:27:51,448
I'm not sure what
the face was that you looked up
586
00:27:51,473 --> 00:27:55,419
to Alex with at the end, but it was
one of great satisfaction, I think.
587
00:27:55,444 --> 00:27:56,658
JUDl GIGGLES
588
00:27:56,683 --> 00:27:57,979
Daddy?
589
00:27:58,004 --> 00:27:59,339
I think it was a daddy look.
590
00:27:59,364 --> 00:28:00,499
Did I do good, Daddy?
591
00:28:00,524 --> 00:28:01,778
He had to check in...
592
00:28:01,803 --> 00:28:04,249
jUDl: The little boy... The little
boy had to check in twice —
593
00:28:04,274 --> 00:28:06,979
after he'd blown the candles out,
594
00:28:07,004 --> 00:28:09,379
and then after he
completed everything. I... Well...
595
00:28:09,404 --> 00:28:11,089
Cos I was expecting
Captain Dickhead here
596
00:28:11,114 --> 00:28:12,809
to just keep lighting 'em again.
597
00:28:12,834 --> 00:28:14,448
That is my full title.
Thank you, Chris.
598
00:28:14,473 --> 00:28:16,809
How come Chris' candles
didn't relight? Yeah, yeah.
599
00:28:16,834 --> 00:28:18,778
Did he just blow them out
with his super strong lungs?
600
00:28:18,803 --> 00:28:21,658
No, he got there quick, that's what
you've got to do with those candles.
601
00:28:21,683 --> 00:28:23,698
If you blow them quick enough,
they don't get down
602
00:28:23,723 --> 00:28:26,299
to the ignition stage. Oh, really!
He seemed pretty efficient.
603
00:28:26,324 --> 00:28:29,019
Yeah, he did succeed,
there's no doubt, in 2:57. Wow!
604
00:28:29,044 --> 00:28:30,658
By stark contrast...
605
00:28:30,683 --> 00:28:34,419
Judi, are you working on some
new catchphrases?
606
00:28:34,444 --> 00:28:35,809
She was really trying.
607
00:28:35,834 --> 00:28:38,219
I think I've got this...
LAUGHTER DROWNS SPEECH
608
00:28:38,244 --> 00:28:40,528
Don't forget, "How's
a marble supposed to roll?
609
00:28:40,553 --> 00:28:41,969
"How's a marble supposed to roll?"
610
00:28:41,994 --> 00:28:43,739
You're in that moment
of that pressure,
611
00:28:43,764 --> 00:28:45,739
you're in a room, it's all plastic,
612
00:28:45,764 --> 00:28:47,458
you think you're going to get
chopped up.
613
00:28:47,483 --> 00:28:50,499
Like, it's... I think I kind of went
into, like, the mum role.
614
00:28:50,524 --> 00:28:52,019
Like, do you know what I mean?
615
00:28:52,044 --> 00:28:55,349
Cooking, breast-feeding
at the same time.
616
00:28:55,374 --> 00:28:57,708
Say... Say... Saying...
Drinking a glass of wine.
617
00:28:57,733 --> 00:29:00,528
Saying sentences repeatedly. Yes,
that's what you say to the kids!
618
00:29:00,553 --> 00:29:02,939
Sit down. Sit down.
Sit down. Sit down!
619
00:29:02,964 --> 00:29:04,939
LAUGHTER
620
00:29:04,964 --> 00:29:08,739
She applauded after 2:32 and we have
had to slow down the footage again —
621
00:29:08,764 --> 00:29:11,969
so it's looking at the candle
and, again, the squatting monster.
622
00:29:13,663 --> 00:29:15,049
It's looking good.
623
00:29:16,744 --> 00:29:18,119
Yeah, I got it!
624
00:29:18,144 --> 00:29:19,768
No way!
625
00:29:19,793 --> 00:29:21,409
Ah... No!
626
00:29:21,434 --> 00:29:23,688
No way.
627
00:29:23,713 --> 00:29:25,409
They are not out. They're not out.
628
00:29:25,434 --> 00:29:26,688
And that is not a squat.
629
00:29:26,713 --> 00:29:29,359
But I... But, but, but... Ah.
630
00:29:29,384 --> 00:29:31,768
I was the fastest to lose.
631
00:29:31,793 --> 00:29:33,229
LAUGHTER
632
00:29:33,254 --> 00:29:35,558
Yeah, you can take
that home with you.
633
00:29:35,583 --> 00:29:37,049
Good. Let's award some points.
634
00:29:37,074 --> 00:29:39,839
OK, well, Chris and Bridget
definitely get points.
635
00:29:39,864 --> 00:29:42,159
Four points to Bridget,
five to Chris Ramsey.
636
00:29:42,184 --> 00:29:43,589
APPLAUSE
637
00:29:43,614 --> 00:29:46,159
The other three just didn't,
didn't do the task so...
638
00:29:46,184 --> 00:29:48,719
So they get zero.
Yes, but we preserved our dignity.
639
00:29:50,713 --> 00:29:52,438
Let's have one more task,
then, please!
640
00:29:52,463 --> 00:29:55,599
Here we go, it's time to tick
something off my bucket list.
641
00:30:01,713 --> 00:30:02,879
Oh, no.
642
00:30:02,904 --> 00:30:05,279
Ha-ha, ha! What're you doing?
643
00:30:05,304 --> 00:30:08,279
Something's different.
You cut your hair?
644
00:30:08,304 --> 00:30:09,599
Is it your suit?
645
00:30:10,663 --> 00:30:12,959
Oh, yeah. It's my special outfit.
646
00:30:12,984 --> 00:30:15,239
I like seeing you in that
position, actually.
647
00:30:18,104 --> 00:30:21,688
"Enable Alex to bite his duck."
648
00:30:21,713 --> 00:30:23,999
"You may not encroach upon
the decking."
649
00:30:24,024 --> 00:30:25,688
"Fastest wins."
650
00:30:25,713 --> 00:30:29,638
"Also the person who gets Alex
the least wet gets a bonus point.
651
00:30:29,663 --> 00:30:31,719
"Your time starts now."
652
00:30:31,744 --> 00:30:34,209
So you have to be able to bite
the duck?
653
00:30:34,234 --> 00:30:35,599
I just want to bite the duck.
654
00:30:35,624 --> 00:30:37,959
Can you tell me how far
the duck is in?
655
00:30:37,984 --> 00:30:39,849
Uh, the duck's at the bottom of
the bucket.
656
00:30:39,874 --> 00:30:42,129
This is like a really filthy task.
657
00:30:42,154 --> 00:30:43,799
APPLAUSE
658
00:30:46,434 --> 00:30:48,129
You came up with this task,
didn't you?
659
00:30:48,154 --> 00:30:50,079
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
660
00:30:50,104 --> 00:30:52,409
So you dressed yourself in pink.
I don't... Yep.
661
00:30:52,434 --> 00:30:54,209
You tied yourself up. Yeah.
662
00:30:54,234 --> 00:30:57,009
And you said that the challenge is
to help you to bite your duck.
663
00:30:57,034 --> 00:30:59,359
Enable, I went for enable.
What's going on with you?
664
00:30:59,384 --> 00:31:02,049
Well... I think you're going through
some difficult years.
665
00:31:02,074 --> 00:31:04,369
LAUGHTER
666
00:31:04,394 --> 00:31:06,329
It is creepy when someone ties
theirs elf up. I...
667
00:31:06,354 --> 00:31:08,079
Or acts like they're so tied up.
Mm. Yeah.
668
00:31:08,104 --> 00:31:10,799
But really they could set yourself
free. You did tie yourself up.
669
00:31:10,824 --> 00:31:13,159
There were other people.
There was the camera crew...
670
00:31:13,184 --> 00:31:16,599
You asked them to tie you up. Yes.
It's really weird, mate.
671
00:31:16,624 --> 00:31:19,129
I think we're going to have to have
a little chat afterwards.
672
00:31:19,154 --> 00:31:22,079
Yes. Anyway, the challenge is there
for these poor people to attempt.
673
00:31:22,104 --> 00:31:23,729
Mm-hm. Who's first?
674
00:31:23,754 --> 00:31:25,369
Well, sometimes they're a team,
675
00:31:25,394 --> 00:31:27,729
sometimes they all just do
the same silly things.
676
00:31:27,754 --> 00:31:29,518
It's judi, it's Sophie
and it's Bridget
677
00:31:29,543 --> 00:31:31,438
all at the same time, here we go.
678
00:31:31,463 --> 00:31:33,849
Um, is your duck in there?
679
00:31:33,874 --> 00:31:35,239
Yeah, I can see it.
680
00:31:35,264 --> 00:31:36,489
Is it floating?
681
00:31:36,514 --> 00:31:39,209
Not at the moment.
Right, can I use something, then?
682
00:31:39,234 --> 00:31:40,568
It doesn't say I can't.
683
00:31:44,154 --> 00:31:45,518
How big's your duck?
684
00:31:45,543 --> 00:31:46,879
Below average.
685
00:31:46,904 --> 00:31:49,518
LAUGHTER
686
00:31:49,543 --> 00:31:52,879
It's fine. It's fine, Alex.
We've got this, babe.
687
00:31:52,904 --> 00:31:54,768
All right.
I'm quite keen to bite my duck.
688
00:32:05,314 --> 00:32:06,879
Can you bite the duck now?
689
00:32:10,984 --> 00:32:12,809
No, you can't. Mm.
690
00:32:20,834 --> 00:32:22,009
Come forward, Al...
691
00:32:22,034 --> 00:32:23,648
AUDIENCE OOHS
692
00:32:34,834 --> 00:32:36,499
I think he's eating it, isn't he?
693
00:32:36,524 --> 00:32:38,089
APPLAUSE
Oh.
694
00:32:39,624 --> 00:32:41,009
This is so good.
695
00:32:41,034 --> 00:32:42,599
Like, it feels good, doesn't it?
696
00:32:45,444 --> 00:32:46,778
Yeah.
697
00:32:46,803 --> 00:32:47,959
OK.
698
00:32:47,984 --> 00:32:50,929
This is amazing.
I'm so happy and proud of you.
699
00:32:52,884 --> 00:32:54,448
Alex, you've got to work with me.
700
00:32:55,553 --> 00:32:56,648
What do you want me to...
701
00:32:56,673 --> 00:32:59,039
Bite it here.
702
00:32:59,064 --> 00:33:00,249
Hold on.
703
00:33:04,194 --> 00:33:05,499
Yes!
704
00:33:05,524 --> 00:33:07,578
APPLAUSE
705
00:33:07,603 --> 00:33:10,059
I should've thought
of that much quicker.
706
00:33:10,084 --> 00:33:12,328
I'm disappointed in myself.
I really am.
707
00:33:16,244 --> 00:33:19,939
Did you see how... Look,
he was really fighting against me.
708
00:33:19,964 --> 00:33:23,169
Everybody else, you opened
your mouth WIDE enough!
709
00:33:23,194 --> 00:33:26,609
And if you think of it on
a scientific level, right...
710
00:33:26,634 --> 00:33:28,289
Ah, good. At last. Right?
711
00:33:28,314 --> 00:33:30,889
...me and Sophie — look at
the height difference.
712
00:33:30,914 --> 00:33:35,299
How did she reach so far in
for him to bite straight away?
713
00:33:35,324 --> 00:33:37,648
Be... Because... That shows he
wasn't biting for me.
714
00:33:37,673 --> 00:33:40,089
He should be leaning...
Listen, isn't it!
715
00:33:40,114 --> 00:33:43,408
Look at the length. Put your arm
out. Put your arm out, girl!
716
00:33:43,433 --> 00:33:47,169
Look at that! So that's
a scientific thing, you see.
717
00:33:47,194 --> 00:33:49,778
Very similar techniques
from all three.
718
00:33:49,803 --> 00:33:51,528
They were all very logical.
719
00:33:51,553 --> 00:33:55,499
All the women, they weren't lured by
this, just a mention of water.
720
00:33:55,524 --> 00:33:57,019
Uh... But let's... Let's...
721
00:33:57,044 --> 00:33:58,729
And the bucket and the wellies!
722
00:33:58,754 --> 00:34:00,689
Come on. Bridget, you've fulfilled,
723
00:34:00,714 --> 00:34:03,419
unknowingly, one of
Alex's sexual fantasies
724
00:34:03,444 --> 00:34:05,249
by turning him into a beekeeper.
725
00:34:05,274 --> 00:34:07,729
LAUGHTER
726
00:34:07,754 --> 00:34:10,328
He enjoyed...
He bit very hard on that duck.
727
00:34:10,353 --> 00:34:12,328
He did. Yep. He did.
728
00:34:12,353 --> 00:34:14,859
Bridget enjoyed it as well.
You had a big smile on your face
729
00:34:14,884 --> 00:34:17,219
while feeding the duck in
one minute and one second.
730
00:34:17,244 --> 00:34:18,889
ALL: Wow.
APPLAUSE
731
00:34:18,914 --> 00:34:21,528
Sophie was 2:13. judi, 3:15.
Oh, yeah.
732
00:34:21,553 --> 00:34:23,299
So all sub, like, ten or four.
733
00:34:23,324 --> 00:34:24,859
Yep. We've had three good attempts.
734
00:34:24,884 --> 00:34:28,169
Right, that's the end
of that part. Bye!
735
00:34:28,194 --> 00:34:31,139
APPLAUSE
736
00:34:37,194 --> 00:34:38,959
APPLAUSE
737
00:34:38,984 --> 00:34:40,089
Hello, again.
738
00:34:40,114 --> 00:34:42,959
We have made it to the final part of
the show. What's left, Alex?
739
00:34:42,984 --> 00:34:44,889
Well, I still want to
bite my duck, Greg.
740
00:34:44,914 --> 00:34:48,679
So far, judi, Bridget and Sophie
kindly enabled me to do so.
741
00:34:48,704 --> 00:34:51,889
But will the boys also help me out,
and can they do it faster?
742
00:34:51,914 --> 00:34:53,889
And let's not forget there's
a bonus point for
743
00:34:53,914 --> 00:34:55,759
the person that gets me
the least wet.
744
00:34:55,784 --> 00:34:58,289
Here, then, is how Ardal
and Chris got on.
745
00:35:00,144 --> 00:35:01,369
Sorry, Alex.
746
00:35:05,994 --> 00:35:07,578
Nothing went in the bucket.
747
00:35:15,714 --> 00:35:17,089
This has worked quite well.
748
00:35:17,114 --> 00:35:18,328
Yeah.
749
00:35:18,353 --> 00:35:19,479
Is it bite able yet?
750
00:35:19,504 --> 00:35:20,939
Not yet, no, Chris.
751
00:35:20,964 --> 00:35:22,889
I don't want to get you wet, Alex.
752
00:35:22,914 --> 00:35:25,578
So... Try something like this.
753
00:35:28,634 --> 00:35:29,759
Mm-hm.
754
00:35:34,074 --> 00:35:35,299
Anywhere?
755
00:35:35,324 --> 00:35:36,448
Not yet. No.
756
00:35:36,473 --> 00:35:37,809
I'm enjoying myself.
757
00:35:40,473 --> 00:35:42,049
You can go fuck yourself, you can.
758
00:35:42,074 --> 00:35:43,448
Pardon?
759
00:35:43,473 --> 00:35:45,169
That's never going
to fill up, is it?
760
00:35:45,194 --> 00:35:47,019
There's a hole in that bucket.
761
00:35:47,044 --> 00:35:49,689
The question is — is it coming out
faster than it's going in?
762
00:35:49,714 --> 00:35:51,969
I'd say it is going up.
But very slowly.
763
00:35:53,864 --> 00:35:55,658
Are you getting close
to that duck yet?
764
00:35:55,683 --> 00:35:58,019
I can't see the duck.
There's a pipe in the way.
765
00:35:58,044 --> 00:36:00,578
Oh, my God, it's not even on
full power, you shit.
766
00:36:00,603 --> 00:36:02,219
Here it comes.
767
00:36:05,404 --> 00:36:07,089
Why is the shed getting wet?
768
00:36:07,114 --> 00:36:09,379
Is it going out the end of
the shed? This is a good hose!
769
00:36:10,683 --> 00:36:12,129
Oh, God.
770
00:36:12,154 --> 00:36:14,448
I think plan A again, Alex.
I'm really sorry.
771
00:36:14,473 --> 00:36:15,528
What if I tip the bucket?
772
00:36:19,124 --> 00:36:20,528
Sorry, Alex.
773
00:36:20,553 --> 00:36:21,889
Can you see the duck yet, Chris?
774
00:36:21,914 --> 00:36:23,328
Can't see the duck.
775
00:36:23,353 --> 00:36:25,689
He's having a nice time.
Is he? Yeah.
776
00:36:25,714 --> 00:36:27,609
OK, that's just going to
take too long so,
777
00:36:27,634 --> 00:36:29,889
just going to knock the bucket over.
Mm-hm.
778
00:36:33,914 --> 00:36:35,559
Now you've got the duck.
779
00:36:35,584 --> 00:36:37,849
LAUGHTER
780
00:36:37,874 --> 00:36:40,609
APPLAUSE
781
00:36:42,634 --> 00:36:44,169
Hey! I've stopped the clock.
782
00:36:44,194 --> 00:36:45,689
Told you we'd get there, Alex.
783
00:36:45,714 --> 00:36:46,769
Uh-huh.
784
00:36:46,794 --> 00:36:49,099
OK. See you. Thank you.
785
00:36:49,124 --> 00:36:51,528
Doing some disgusting things
to that duck.
786
00:36:51,553 --> 00:36:53,299
SLURPING
787
00:36:54,553 --> 00:36:57,249
Yes. Yes!
788
00:36:59,964 --> 00:37:01,739
Wow. Thank you, Chris.
789
00:37:01,764 --> 00:37:04,208
It's OK, and just cos I think
the Taskmaster would respect it,
790
00:37:04,233 --> 00:37:05,939
Ahhh!
791
00:37:08,404 --> 00:37:10,208
ALEX YELLS
792
00:37:10,233 --> 00:37:12,538
I don't even care about the points,
this is fucking great.
793
00:37:12,563 --> 00:37:13,849
This is therapy.
794
00:37:13,874 --> 00:37:15,049
Chris? Yeah?
795
00:37:15,074 --> 00:37:16,819
You can go now. Thanks, mate.
796
00:37:16,844 --> 00:37:17,819
OK.
797
00:37:19,074 --> 00:37:20,609
Stick your duck up your arse.
798
00:37:23,964 --> 00:37:25,609
GREG LAUGHS
799
00:37:27,233 --> 00:37:28,379
Oh, Christopher, I've...
800
00:37:28,404 --> 00:37:29,939
I've stopped giving bonus points,
801
00:37:29,964 --> 00:37:31,769
but I can't tell you what
an absolute...
802
00:37:31,794 --> 00:37:34,049
How right you were.
803
00:37:34,074 --> 00:37:35,619
And how long that jet was.
804
00:37:35,644 --> 00:37:37,969
And, you know, you've got to
share that glory
805
00:37:37,994 --> 00:37:42,299
with Ardal, who immediately threw
a pan of water at Alex's face.
806
00:37:44,683 --> 00:37:47,259
Chris was the last person to do
the task and he was the only one
807
00:37:47,284 --> 00:37:49,619
who discovered the elaborate
hole in the bucket,
808
00:37:49,644 --> 00:37:51,979
which went down through
a pipe into my wellies.
809
00:37:52,004 --> 00:37:53,049
There we are.
810
00:37:53,074 --> 00:37:54,538
So do you want to hear some times?
811
00:37:54,563 --> 00:37:55,658
Yes.
812
00:37:55,683 --> 00:37:57,979
LAUGHTER
813
00:37:58,004 --> 00:38:00,819
OK, well, we know that
the fastest person was Bridget,
814
00:38:00,844 --> 00:38:03,899
so it's five points to Bridget,
four to Sophie, three to judi.
815
00:38:03,924 --> 00:38:06,619
Ardal did it in 14:37.
816
00:38:06,644 --> 00:38:09,408
Chris in 15:38.
817
00:38:09,433 --> 00:38:10,979
Wow. So just the one point.
818
00:38:11,004 --> 00:38:15,049
But there is a bonus point
for whoever kept me the driest.
819
00:38:15,074 --> 00:38:18,059
I would say all three
ladies didn't wet me.
820
00:38:18,084 --> 00:38:20,379
So all three ladies get
a bonus point.
821
00:38:20,404 --> 00:38:21,309
I think so.
822
00:38:21,334 --> 00:38:22,489
Perfectly acceptable.
823
00:38:22,514 --> 00:38:25,569
All right, so, six to Bridget,
five to Sophie, four to judi,
824
00:38:25,594 --> 00:38:28,739
two to Ardal and one to Chris.
And we're done! We're done!
825
00:38:30,334 --> 00:38:32,619
Right, please make
your way to the stage
826
00:38:32,644 --> 00:38:33,929
for the final task of the show.
827
00:38:33,954 --> 00:38:35,929
APPLAUSE
828
00:38:44,124 --> 00:38:45,418
Who's going to read it out?
829
00:38:45,443 --> 00:38:48,099
Please can you read it out, judi?
Girls.
830
00:38:48,124 --> 00:38:51,538
"As a team, put one of your faces
831
00:38:51,563 --> 00:38:54,699
"and one of your legs through
the hole."
832
00:38:54,724 --> 00:38:56,059
I'm not doing that shit.
833
00:38:58,363 --> 00:39:03,059
"The Taskmaster will guess whether
the leg belongs to
834
00:39:03,084 --> 00:39:06,418
"the face or the other contestant.
835
00:39:06,443 --> 00:39:10,899
"Most wrong guesses after three
rounds wins."
836
00:39:10,924 --> 00:39:12,418
One at a time.
837
00:39:14,414 --> 00:39:16,749
One of the teams...
jUDl CHORTLES
838
00:39:16,774 --> 00:39:17,779
...will, uh...
POP!
839
00:39:17,804 --> 00:39:19,418
...a face.
840
00:39:19,443 --> 00:39:23,139
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
841
00:39:24,844 --> 00:39:27,468
So it's three rounds each.
The boys are going to go first.
842
00:39:27,493 --> 00:39:28,668
I want the men in the booth.
843
00:39:28,693 --> 00:39:31,059
Men, please, go into the booth.
All right.
844
00:39:31,084 --> 00:39:33,389
They're making their way into
the booth now.
845
00:39:33,414 --> 00:39:35,779
OK. So they're now in.
846
00:39:35,804 --> 00:39:39,418
And if you just scream, "I'm ready,"
when you're ready, please.
847
00:39:39,443 --> 00:39:42,179
Quite tricky cos they're quite
of similar size, these two.
848
00:39:42,204 --> 00:39:44,668
Well, I should make it clear
they are all wearing
849
00:39:44,693 --> 00:39:47,288
the same size boot
and the same size boiler suit.
850
00:39:47,313 --> 00:39:50,418
They are deliberately baggy.
They're all size nine boots.
851
00:39:50,443 --> 00:39:52,418
So you can't be looking at
that detail.
852
00:39:52,443 --> 00:39:53,389
Thank you.
853
00:39:53,414 --> 00:39:54,779
ARDAL: Ready for the first one.
854
00:39:54,804 --> 00:39:56,668
OK. I'm going to...
Watch out, hold on.
855
00:39:56,693 --> 00:39:59,029
You sure you're ready?
CHRIS: Yeah.
856
00:39:59,054 --> 00:40:00,699
OK, well, I'm going to
show you the face.
857
00:40:00,724 --> 00:40:02,418
Of course, there's the little face.
858
00:40:04,164 --> 00:40:05,749
Little Ardal's face.
859
00:40:05,774 --> 00:40:07,418
And a boot, there it is.
860
00:40:07,443 --> 00:40:08,829
It's going to be really hard.
861
00:40:08,854 --> 00:40:10,548
I think that's Ardal's face.
862
00:40:10,573 --> 00:40:12,189
GREG LAUGHS
863
00:40:13,573 --> 00:40:15,909
But I think it's
Chris Ramsey's leg.
864
00:40:15,934 --> 00:40:18,619
I'm now going to ask Chris Ramsey
to leave the booth.
865
00:40:19,884 --> 00:40:21,139
Ah!
866
00:40:21,164 --> 00:40:22,979
APPLAUSE
867
00:40:24,164 --> 00:40:25,579
Lovely.
868
00:40:25,604 --> 00:40:27,579
OK, please return to your spots.
Thank you.
869
00:40:27,604 --> 00:40:29,139
And it's time for the...
Great work.
870
00:40:29,164 --> 00:40:30,629
...ladies to enter the booth.
871
00:40:32,164 --> 00:40:33,468
Where is he?
872
00:40:33,493 --> 00:40:34,629
We don't know.
873
00:40:34,654 --> 00:40:36,059
Oh, sorry!
GREG CHORTLES
874
00:40:37,493 --> 00:40:38,779
Sorry.
875
00:40:41,084 --> 00:40:43,338
Waiting in the booth for
the ladies.
876
00:40:45,323 --> 00:40:46,779
Goodness me, Ardal!
877
00:40:46,804 --> 00:40:48,499
GIRLS: Sh! We're ready.
878
00:40:48,524 --> 00:40:50,909
You hear? Oh, they're ready.
They're ready, Greg. Ready.
879
00:40:50,934 --> 00:40:53,579
Are you ready to see the face?
Oh, God, am I?
880
00:40:53,604 --> 00:40:55,418
That's judi Love. Yeah.
881
00:40:55,443 --> 00:40:56,989
Is this judi Love's leg?
882
00:40:58,854 --> 00:41:01,109
Right, I believe it...
883
00:41:01,134 --> 00:41:03,989
That it's Judi Love's face. Sure.
884
00:41:04,014 --> 00:41:05,418
SCATTERED LAUGHTER
885
00:41:05,443 --> 00:41:08,418
But I do not believe it is
Judi Love's leg.
886
00:41:08,443 --> 00:41:09,989
OK, so one at a time.
887
00:41:10,014 --> 00:41:12,348
There's one lady not doing
anything — definitely.
888
00:41:12,373 --> 00:41:15,139
Might be two, but if the definite
lady could leave the booth, please,
889
00:41:15,164 --> 00:41:16,418
and return to your circle.
890
00:41:16,443 --> 00:41:18,749
There they go. Ha-ha! Right.
891
00:41:18,774 --> 00:41:21,389
I would now ask anyone who's not
judi Love to leave the booth.
892
00:41:21,414 --> 00:41:23,659
AUDIENCE OOHS
893
00:41:23,684 --> 00:41:25,109
Ooh, ho—ho!
894
00:41:25,134 --> 00:41:27,499
APPLAUSE
895
00:41:27,524 --> 00:41:29,548
I'm having an absolute shocker.
896
00:41:29,573 --> 00:41:30,939
I can't...
897
00:41:30,964 --> 00:41:34,189
LAUGHTER
898
00:41:38,323 --> 00:41:40,789
It's like they're pulling
a dead body out of there.
899
00:41:41,884 --> 00:41:43,139
Mm; Oh!
900
00:41:45,774 --> 00:41:47,399
Oh, so it's one-one.
901
00:41:47,424 --> 00:41:48,659
Well, I mean, it's electric.
902
00:41:48,684 --> 00:41:50,019
We got to do this again?
903
00:41:50,044 --> 00:41:51,428
Twice more.
904
00:41:51,453 --> 00:41:53,859
Pop the boys in the booth.
Boys in the booth.
905
00:41:53,884 --> 00:41:55,218
Boys in the booth.
906
00:41:55,243 --> 00:41:57,218
Pull the curtain!
907
00:41:57,243 --> 00:41:58,509
Hmm.
908
00:41:58,534 --> 00:42:00,189
You disappointed
with yourself, Greg?
909
00:42:00,214 --> 00:42:02,109
No, it was a sort
of pleasurable "hmm."
910
00:42:02,134 --> 00:42:03,468
CHRIS, MUFFLED: Ready.
911
00:42:03,493 --> 00:42:05,759
OK, they're ready, Greg.
912
00:42:05,784 --> 00:42:07,039
Here's Chris' face, presumably.
913
00:42:07,064 --> 00:42:09,789
Yeah. OK, but is this part
of Chris Ramsey?
914
00:42:09,814 --> 00:42:12,189
Ooh, what an angle.
915
00:42:12,214 --> 00:42:13,759
I mean, it's very clever.
916
00:42:13,784 --> 00:42:15,548
Does that leg belong to that face?
917
00:42:15,573 --> 00:42:19,298
Against my instinct,
I'm going to say that leg
918
00:42:19,323 --> 00:42:21,149
does belong to that face.
919
00:42:21,174 --> 00:42:24,149
I'm going to ask Ardal O'Hanlon
to leave the booth, please.
920
00:42:25,734 --> 00:42:26,989
Fuck!
921
00:42:27,014 --> 00:42:28,478
AUDIENCE OOHS
922
00:42:28,503 --> 00:42:30,789
Greg, you got it right.
You were right.
923
00:42:30,814 --> 00:42:31,709
I was right!
924
00:42:33,174 --> 00:42:34,709
The door has opened for the women.
925
00:42:34,734 --> 00:42:35,989
Right, so now I know,
926
00:42:36,014 --> 00:42:37,909
I must do the opposite to
what I actually think.
927
00:42:37,934 --> 00:42:39,509
LAUGHTER DROWNS SPEECH
928
00:42:39,534 --> 00:42:42,399
OK, women, please, go back into the
booth. Would you mind?
929
00:42:42,424 --> 00:42:43,909
MUFFLED SPEECH
930
00:42:43,934 --> 00:42:45,509
Course not.
931
00:42:45,534 --> 00:42:47,839
Whose face do you think you're
going to see, Greg?
932
00:42:47,864 --> 00:42:49,228
FEMALE VOICE: Ready.
933
00:42:49,253 --> 00:42:51,789
Oh, now... Now that the voice has
been disguised, I don't know.
934
00:42:53,424 --> 00:42:54,709
It's Bridget. Ooh.
935
00:42:54,734 --> 00:42:57,269
Yes. But is that Bridget? Oh.
936
00:42:57,294 --> 00:42:59,629
I don't believe that's
Bridget's leg.
937
00:42:59,654 --> 00:43:01,949
OK, could the spare part
please leave?
938
00:43:01,974 --> 00:43:04,199
GRUNTING
939
00:43:05,373 --> 00:43:08,308
I still feel confident. I knew it
wasn't Sophie's little leg.
940
00:43:08,333 --> 00:43:11,269
OK, if you're not Bridget Christie,
please leave the booth.
941
00:43:12,814 --> 00:43:14,669
AUDIENCE OOHS
942
00:43:14,694 --> 00:43:16,199
They've done it again!
943
00:43:16,224 --> 00:43:17,669
APPLAUSE
I should've known,
944
00:43:17,694 --> 00:43:20,069
with all the ooh, ah, ah.
I should've known.
945
00:43:20,094 --> 00:43:21,839
The women can't lose now.
946
00:43:21,864 --> 00:43:24,789
But can the men at least get
a draw? The final time.
947
00:43:24,814 --> 00:43:26,279
So, basically, we've won?
948
00:43:26,304 --> 00:43:27,639
SOPHIE: Yep.
949
00:43:27,664 --> 00:43:30,119
Well, you might draw if they do it
and you don't on the last one.
950
00:43:30,144 --> 00:43:31,639
Sorry, judi. Yes, you've won.
951
00:43:31,664 --> 00:43:33,478
LAUGHTER
952
00:43:33,503 --> 00:43:35,069
ARDAL: We're ready.
953
00:43:35,094 --> 00:43:36,428
Oh, quite quick, this one.
954
00:43:36,453 --> 00:43:37,639
SHE SQUEAKS
955
00:43:37,664 --> 00:43:39,509
Oh, I just trod on something.
956
00:43:40,664 --> 00:43:41,869
MUFFLED: Oh!
957
00:43:43,024 --> 00:43:44,389
I think that's Ardal's foot.
958
00:43:44,414 --> 00:43:45,949
Well, let's see.
959
00:43:45,974 --> 00:43:47,279
It's Chris' face.
960
00:43:47,304 --> 00:43:48,558
Is that Chris' leg?
961
00:43:48,583 --> 00:43:50,839
Make some noises, make some
weird noises, Ardal.
962
00:43:52,174 --> 00:43:53,558
Ooh!
963
00:43:54,694 --> 00:43:58,029
BRIDGET 81 SOPHIE: # It's a long
way to Tipperary... #
964
00:43:58,054 --> 00:43:59,919
LAUGHTER
965
00:43:59,944 --> 00:44:01,199
It's Ardal's leg.
966
00:44:01,224 --> 00:44:04,949
Well, if you're not Chris Ramsey,
please leave the booth.
967
00:44:04,974 --> 00:44:06,228
BRIDGET: Oh.
968
00:44:06,253 --> 00:44:08,279
Bugged
969
00:44:08,304 --> 00:44:09,919
It was Ardal's leg.
970
00:44:11,614 --> 00:44:13,079
See if you can do three for three.
971
00:44:13,104 --> 00:44:14,389
Oh, for fuck's sake, hun.
972
00:44:14,414 --> 00:44:17,639
LAUGHTER
973
00:44:17,664 --> 00:44:19,589
They've beaten you twice,
though, Greg.
974
00:44:19,614 --> 00:44:21,558
Yeah, they won't beat me
a third time.
975
00:44:21,583 --> 00:44:22,919
FEMALE VOICE: We're ready.
976
00:44:22,944 --> 00:44:24,029
Right. Yeah.
977
00:44:25,583 --> 00:44:27,228
It's judi again. OK.
978
00:44:29,694 --> 00:44:31,558
And there it is, dangling.
979
00:44:31,583 --> 00:44:34,669
I think that is not
Judi Love's leg.
980
00:44:34,694 --> 00:44:38,279
As always, I'll ask one of you
to leave the booth.
981
00:44:38,304 --> 00:44:39,719
Is it your leg again?
982
00:44:39,744 --> 00:44:41,509
It's... It's my leg, babes.
983
00:44:41,534 --> 00:44:43,799
Send Sophie out, then.
984
00:44:43,824 --> 00:44:46,279
There it is, three for three.
985
00:44:46,304 --> 00:44:48,029
It was.
986
00:44:48,054 --> 00:44:49,358
Right, come back down here
987
00:44:49,383 --> 00:44:51,669
and we'll see how that's affected
the final scores!
988
00:44:51,694 --> 00:44:54,199
APPLAUSE
989
00:44:58,224 --> 00:44:59,589
Welcome back. Thank you, Greg.
990
00:44:59,614 --> 00:45:01,389
Ladies, you did very well.
991
00:45:01,414 --> 00:45:03,389
Mm-hm. We tricked you.
The boys deceived me once.
992
00:45:03,414 --> 00:45:04,919
I am dictating.
993
00:45:04,944 --> 00:45:06,358
The points will be scored thus.
994
00:45:06,383 --> 00:45:08,949
Two points per person
per deception.
995
00:45:08,974 --> 00:45:10,358
AUDIENCE OOHS
996
00:45:10,383 --> 00:45:12,669
OK, which means the men
get two points each.
997
00:45:12,694 --> 00:45:13,799
Correct. Yeah.
998
00:45:13,824 --> 00:45:15,159
The women get six points each.
999
00:45:15,184 --> 00:45:17,669
In terms of the series,
Chris is no longer in the lead.
1000
00:45:17,694 --> 00:45:19,589
Bridget has stolen that from him.
1001
00:45:19,614 --> 00:45:23,589
What? Because in this episode, she
has won by a landslide nine points.
1002
00:45:23,614 --> 00:45:25,488
She has 25 in total. Wow.
1003
00:45:25,513 --> 00:45:26,749
Bridget Christie. Wow!
1004
00:45:26,774 --> 00:45:30,129
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1005
00:45:30,154 --> 00:45:32,159
I'm shocked!
1006
00:45:32,184 --> 00:45:33,669
Ooh!
1007
00:45:33,694 --> 00:45:36,358
Bridget Christie wins Episode Three!
1008
00:45:36,383 --> 00:45:40,079
Please go and gather and giggle at
your unusually named artefacts.
1009
00:45:40,104 --> 00:45:43,079
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1010
00:45:44,624 --> 00:45:46,079
Right, we'll do this again soon,
1011
00:45:46,104 --> 00:45:48,639
but in the meantime, let's celebrate
tonight's big winner.
1012
00:45:48,664 --> 00:45:50,919
It's Bridget Christie!
1013
00:45:50,944 --> 00:45:53,238
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1014
00:46:14,064 --> 00:46:17,679
Subtitles by Red Bee Media