1
00:00:05,385 --> 00:00:07,360
Ha-ha!
TYPEWRITER CLACKS
2
00:00:07,385 --> 00:00:08,590
No way!
3
00:00:10,464 --> 00:00:11,790
Er... Gosh!
4
00:00:11,815 --> 00:00:13,040
Where's the hole?
5
00:00:14,784 --> 00:00:16,689
Argh! Oh! Uuuurgh!
6
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Are you having a laugh?
TYPEWRITER DINGS
7
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Ugh!
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THEY GASP
Argh!
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00:00:26,225 --> 00:00:27,920
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
10
00:00:27,945 --> 00:00:34,920
This program me contains strong
language and adult humour
11
00:00:34,945 --> 00:00:36,330
Hello. I am Greg Davies.
12
00:00:36,355 --> 00:00:39,480
I am the Taskmaster,
and this is Taskmaster.
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00:00:39,505 --> 00:00:43,559
It's been said that nothing in life
that's worth having is easy,
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and yet I find it takes no effort
to get ready for this,
15
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and I am one hot tamale.
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00:00:48,975 --> 00:00:50,280
LAUGHTER
17
00:00:50,305 --> 00:00:52,330
Let's watch our less
fortunate guests...
18
00:00:52,355 --> 00:00:54,880
CHUCKLING
..work for little reward.
19
00:00:54,905 --> 00:00:58,970
They are Ardal O'Hanlon...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
20
00:00:58,995 --> 00:01:01,720
...Bridget Christie...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
21
00:01:01,745 --> 00:01:04,490
...Chris Ramsey...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
22
00:01:04,515 --> 00:01:07,080
...judi Love...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
23
00:01:07,105 --> 00:01:09,769
...and Sophie Duker.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
24
00:01:12,105 --> 00:01:15,000
And next to me, a man
whose only facial expression
25
00:01:15,025 --> 00:01:16,850
is that of a baffled hare.
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00:01:16,875 --> 00:01:20,240
It's little Alex Horne.
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00:01:20,265 --> 00:01:23,050
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
Yeah.
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00:01:24,875 --> 00:01:27,280
Fact time? Yeah, I'm going
to tell you some things about me.
29
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A couple of facts, and |'ve...|...
I think they're also jokes.
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00:01:30,305 --> 00:01:31,850
LAUGHTER
OK.
31
00:01:31,875 --> 00:01:34,490
I support Liverpool Football Club.
Mm. Yeah.
32
00:01:34,515 --> 00:01:36,410
I'm a die-hard fan.
33
00:01:36,435 --> 00:01:38,960
So, there we go. I like both
Liverpool and the movie Die Hard.
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00:01:38,985 --> 00:01:40,850
LAUGHTER
35
00:01:40,875 --> 00:01:43,210
And the other one —
here are some things I don't like.
36
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HE SIGHS
Omelettes, orchids.
37
00:01:45,625 --> 00:01:47,519
So, that's it —
just omelettes or children.
38
00:01:47,544 --> 00:01:49,050
LAUGHTER
39
00:01:49,075 --> 00:01:51,000
Anyway, Prize Task time.
40
00:01:51,025 --> 00:01:53,490
Yes, you bet your bloody life it is,
Greg.
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00:01:53,515 --> 00:01:57,519
And this time they've been asked
to bring in the most calming item.
42
00:01:57,544 --> 00:01:59,880
Ah. Ah. So chill right now.
43
00:01:59,905 --> 00:02:02,319
The most calming item will
get its owner five points,
44
00:02:02,344 --> 00:02:04,720
and at the end of the show,
the overall winner will take home
45
00:02:04,745 --> 00:02:07,050
five calming items
and become all relaxed and floppy.
46
00:02:07,075 --> 00:02:08,649
LAUGHTER
47
00:02:11,515 --> 00:02:14,519
Bridget. Hello.
What makes you relaxed and floppy?
48
00:02:14,544 --> 00:02:17,319
Um, I've brought in
a cat-cafe voucher.
49
00:02:17,344 --> 00:02:19,010
Here's the voucher.
50
00:02:19,035 --> 00:02:20,850
LAUGHTER
51
00:02:20,875 --> 00:02:23,850
Dogs and cats are used
to help people
52
00:02:23,875 --> 00:02:25,880
with post-traumatic stress order.
Mm—hm.
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00:02:25,905 --> 00:02:29,769
I heard a war surgeon talking
on Desert Island Discs explaining.
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Keep it light.
55
00:02:31,315 --> 00:02:33,290
LAUGHTER
56
00:02:33,315 --> 00:02:37,080
He went to meet the queen,
and she said, "I can help you."
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00:02:37,105 --> 00:02:40,519
She called the corgis and got him
to stroke them,
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00:02:40,544 --> 00:02:42,519
and he was absolutely fine.
59
00:02:42,544 --> 00:02:44,519
LAUGHTER
Oh. Make a point, uh...
60
00:02:44,544 --> 00:02:46,960
No, no, no, I haven't finished yet.
61
00:02:46,985 --> 00:02:49,010
LAUGHTER
CHRIS: Love it.
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00:02:49,035 --> 00:02:51,050
Hang on, cos I know what
you're going to say.
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00:02:51,075 --> 00:02:53,880
SHE SPEAKS IN AN IRISH ACCENT
"But it's not a cat. It was a dog."
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00:02:53,905 --> 00:02:56,160
Anyway...
LAUGHTER
65
00:02:58,464 --> 00:03:00,800
Well, I've been to a cat cafe,
and it didn't relax me.
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00:03:00,825 --> 00:03:03,569
It's probably my own fault
for bringing my pet budgie
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00:03:03,594 --> 00:03:06,290
and my pet goldfish with me.
LAUGHTER
68
00:03:06,315 --> 00:03:07,569
Right, I'm going to move on.
69
00:03:07,594 --> 00:03:09,880
Judi, what thing have you brought in
70
00:03:09,905 --> 00:03:12,240
that would make me relaxed
and floppy?
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00:03:12,265 --> 00:03:15,810
I brought a lovely
fish water fountain. Here it is.
72
00:03:15,835 --> 00:03:18,160
It looks pretty stressful
for the fish.
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00:03:18,185 --> 00:03:20,490
LAUGHTER
And the fish aren't real.
74
00:03:20,515 --> 00:03:22,319
No, it's relaxing.
75
00:03:22,344 --> 00:03:25,010
And you can lie at night-time
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00:03:25,035 --> 00:03:29,449
and listen to the water
trickling along.
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00:03:29,474 --> 00:03:32,449
Could you try and recreate
the sounds that you would hear?
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00:03:32,474 --> 00:03:35,090
# Grrr—ah—grrr...#
LAUGHTER
79
00:03:36,474 --> 00:03:39,040
# Ha—rrrrrrrr—ah...#
80
00:03:39,065 --> 00:03:41,370
Oh, the fish are gargling,
are they? Yes.
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00:03:41,395 --> 00:03:42,490
LAUGHTER
82
00:03:42,515 --> 00:03:46,210
# Brrrrrrrrr—rrrrrrrrr. #
83
00:03:46,235 --> 00:03:50,090
It makes me more relaxed
than the idea of a war vet
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00:03:50,115 --> 00:03:53,060
stroking one of the queen's corgis.
Ha-ha! Ha-ha!
85
00:03:53,085 --> 00:03:56,010
LAUGHTER
Two down, Greg.
86
00:03:56,035 --> 00:04:00,730
Ardal?
Uh, I brought in, a tea towel.
87
00:04:00,755 --> 00:04:02,649
Woo!
LAUGHTER
88
00:04:02,674 --> 00:04:05,319
Here is the tea towel.
89
00:04:05,344 --> 00:04:07,600
LAUGHTER
90
00:04:07,625 --> 00:04:09,420
Instantly calming.
91
00:04:09,445 --> 00:04:11,010
Well, here's the thing.
92
00:04:11,035 --> 00:04:13,500
I sort of do find tea towels
quite calming.
93
00:04:13,525 --> 00:04:15,210
But why do you find it calming?
94
00:04:15,235 --> 00:04:17,529
Well, it's like a little...a little
comfy blanky.
95
00:04:17,554 --> 00:04:19,170
LAUGHTER
96
00:04:19,195 --> 00:04:21,680
It's also great if you want
to make a baby laugh,
97
00:04:21,705 --> 00:04:23,220
which is very relaxing.
98
00:04:23,245 --> 00:04:25,890
As we all know, sound of babies'
laughter is probably the most
99
00:04:25,915 --> 00:04:28,810
beautiful sound known
to human people. Mm. It is nice.
100
00:04:28,835 --> 00:04:30,420
And all you need is a tea towel
101
00:04:30,445 --> 00:04:32,890
and a baby, obviously, but...
LAUGHTER
102
00:04:32,915 --> 00:04:34,730
"Hello."
LAUGHTER
103
00:04:34,755 --> 00:04:36,090
You know.
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00:04:36,115 --> 00:04:37,579
||Argh!||
105
00:04:37,604 --> 00:04:41,010
And it works brilliantly every time.
LAUGHTER
106
00:04:43,065 --> 00:04:44,250
Chris?
107
00:04:44,275 --> 00:04:47,220
I have brought an aquarium. Ooh.
108
00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:49,040
Mm. Here is the aquarium from Chris.
109
00:04:49,065 --> 00:04:51,420
So, this is just
a visual representation
110
00:04:51,445 --> 00:04:54,579
of the aquarium,
but the one I'm offering you
111
00:04:54,604 --> 00:04:57,610
is the one from my home,
which is 64 litres.
112
00:04:57,635 --> 00:04:59,529
LAUGHTER
113
00:04:59,554 --> 00:05:00,810
Give me some stats.
114
00:05:00,835 --> 00:05:02,649
No, it is.
LAUGHTER
115
00:05:02,674 --> 00:05:05,010
64 litres. I think it's 30—odd
fish points.
116
00:05:05,035 --> 00:05:07,610
Fish points? Certain-size aquariums
have got certain-size points.
117
00:05:07,635 --> 00:05:10,370
Certain amount of points, and each
fish is worth a couple of points.
118
00:05:10,395 --> 00:05:11,690
What'll do it for me,
119
00:05:11,715 --> 00:05:14,170
cos you did a very nice
impression of yours,
120
00:05:14,195 --> 00:05:17,050
perhaps Chris could reproduce
the sound that his makes.
121
00:05:17,075 --> 00:05:19,940
Bop-bop—bop—bop—bop—bop—bop.
LAUGHTER
122
00:05:19,965 --> 00:05:22,300
Brrrrrup—brup—brup—brup—brup—brup,
123
00:05:22,325 --> 00:05:25,370
brup-brup-brup—brup—brup...
124
00:05:25,395 --> 00:05:28,220
Right, good. Stop.
I'll just imagine Bridget's.
125
00:05:28,245 --> 00:05:31,690
Meow! Yah! Aaaargh!
LAUGHTER
126
00:05:31,715 --> 00:05:34,050
All right, good. Sophie, hello.
Hello.
127
00:05:34,075 --> 00:05:36,409
Can you give something
that's actually relaxing?
128
00:05:36,434 --> 00:05:39,610
I've brought
an access—all—areas massager.
129
00:05:39,635 --> 00:05:41,610
And here... Ooh! ..it is.
130
00:05:43,715 --> 00:05:46,020
Yeah. Oh!
LAUGHTER
131
00:05:46,045 --> 00:05:48,380
APPLAUSE
132
00:05:48,405 --> 00:05:52,100
So, this is a...it's a personal
massager. Uh-huh. I know what it is.
133
00:05:52,125 --> 00:05:53,779
I've named... OK.
LAUGHTER
134
00:05:53,804 --> 00:05:56,610
Um, and I just think, like,
muscles get tired. Mm.
135
00:05:56,635 --> 00:06:00,459
People get het-up. Yeah?
So, so you need vibrations. Mm.
136
00:06:00,484 --> 00:06:03,220
...for your back, for your cheek...
Yeah.
137
00:06:03,245 --> 00:06:05,579
...or anywhere else you can think of.
LAUGHTER
138
00:06:05,604 --> 00:06:08,329
Right. Well, there we go.
We've seen all five. OK.
139
00:06:08,354 --> 00:06:12,690
Forgive me, Bridget. The cat cafe,
I did not find in any way relaxing.
140
00:06:12,715 --> 00:06:13,820
OK, so one point to Bridget.
141
00:06:13,845 --> 00:06:17,500
Um, secondly, judi's rubbish
plastic, uh, fish fountain.
142
00:06:17,525 --> 00:06:19,860
LAUGHTER
OK. Two points to you, Judi.
143
00:06:19,885 --> 00:06:22,220
# Brrrrrrrrr-rg. #
LAUGHTER
144
00:06:22,245 --> 00:06:24,610
I'm going to give the sex aid
three points. OK,
145
00:06:24,635 --> 00:06:27,610
I think you should ask the women in
here if they would find it relaxing.
146
00:06:27,635 --> 00:06:28,690
Yes.
147
00:06:28,715 --> 00:06:31,380
I'm as surprised as you
that I found
148
00:06:31,405 --> 00:06:34,250
a dildo less relaxing
than a tea towel.
149
00:06:34,275 --> 00:06:37,220
LAUGHTER
I'm surprised...surprised as you.
150
00:06:40,405 --> 00:06:42,409
As I haven't seen Chris's fish tank,
151
00:06:42,434 --> 00:06:44,820
I have to take his word
that it's relaxing
152
00:06:44,845 --> 00:06:47,160
and he's getting four points
just on his description.
153
00:06:47,185 --> 00:06:50,389
But I am actually going to give
a tea towel five points.
154
00:06:50,414 --> 00:06:51,559
LAUGHTER
155
00:06:51,584 --> 00:06:53,230
And that's an end to it.
APPLAUSE
156
00:06:53,255 --> 00:06:55,590
OK, five points to Ardal O'Hanlon.
Well done.
157
00:06:55,615 --> 00:06:58,080
Let's get the first task started,
please, Alex.
158
00:06:58,105 --> 00:07:01,519
OK then, Greg. And we're off
to the Taskmaster house,
159
00:07:01,544 --> 00:07:04,439
where things are not
as "cement" to be.
160
00:07:04,464 --> 00:07:06,280
HE MOUTHS SI LENTLY
161
00:07:14,135 --> 00:07:16,600
GRINDING
162
00:07:16,625 --> 00:07:18,850
Do you want it to stop? No.
163
00:07:19,825 --> 00:07:21,240
Right.
164
00:07:21,265 --> 00:07:24,920
Use the cement mixer for something
other than mixing cement.
165
00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:29,319
Best use of a cement mixer,
other than mixing cement, wins.
166
00:07:29,344 --> 00:07:32,850
Your time starts when Alex does
an impression of you.
167
00:07:32,875 --> 00:07:35,160
HE SPEAKS IN A BAD GEORDIE ACCENT
I'm Chris Ramsey.
168
00:07:35,185 --> 00:07:36,569
LAUGHTER
169
00:07:36,594 --> 00:07:38,080
Time hasn't started yet then.
170
00:07:38,105 --> 00:07:40,110
I'm af...|'m afraid it has.
171
00:07:40,135 --> 00:07:42,930
Where are you from? Gloucester.
172
00:07:42,955 --> 00:07:45,600
HE SPEAKS IN A WEST COUNTRY ACCENT
Taskmaster. Are you joking?
173
00:07:45,625 --> 00:07:47,319
Hi, babes.
174
00:07:47,344 --> 00:07:48,720
LAUGHTER
175
00:07:49,775 --> 00:07:52,110
OK, well, that is so me.
176
00:07:52,135 --> 00:07:54,000
I haven't thought about this one.
177
00:07:54,025 --> 00:07:55,720
SHE LAUGHS
178
00:07:55,745 --> 00:07:59,439
Oh. Thanks a million.
HE LAUGHS
179
00:07:59,464 --> 00:08:02,569
OK. And, and we're off.
OK. Right.
180
00:08:02,594 --> 00:08:04,130
I'm furious.
181
00:08:04,155 --> 00:08:05,470
Are you? Yeah.
182
00:08:05,495 --> 00:08:07,850
Why? Because you're not doing
an impression of me.
183
00:08:07,875 --> 00:08:10,210
I'm going to do an impression
of you. I'm building up to it. OK.
184
00:08:10,235 --> 00:08:11,760
But you're finding it really hard.
Yes.
185
00:08:11,785 --> 00:08:14,240
Pretend you went to like an
all girls school. Ah, I can do this.
186
00:08:14,265 --> 00:08:15,470
See? Hello, hun.
187
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:19,290
Wow. OK, so are you, like, going
to play, like, lacrosse?
188
00:08:19,315 --> 00:08:22,680
OK, give me a lacrosse stick.
Do you know how to play lacrosse?
189
00:08:22,705 --> 00:08:24,160
Yes. OK.
190
00:08:24,185 --> 00:08:25,720
I'm Sophie Duker.
191
00:08:27,395 --> 00:08:30,370
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
192
00:08:32,344 --> 00:08:35,439
Shall we give you a second chance
with your Sophie impression?
193
00:08:35,464 --> 00:08:37,210
No, I don't think so.
194
00:08:37,235 --> 00:08:40,399
I mean, it was pathetic. Yes.
Yeah. Well, I can't do impressions.
195
00:08:40,424 --> 00:08:42,760
You did everyone else.
You did four impressions.
196
00:08:42,785 --> 00:08:44,800
Did everyone else fine,
and they all knew it was them,
197
00:08:44,825 --> 00:08:47,210
and then when it came to Sophie,
you went, "Oh—ho, hello."
198
00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:48,730
LAUGHTER
"I'm a girl." Yeah.
199
00:08:48,755 --> 00:08:51,160
Speak a little bit
so he can have another go. OK.
200
00:08:51,185 --> 00:08:55,519
Yeah, this is me. OK. Ooh. Ooh.
Ooh, yeah, this is me speaking.
201
00:08:55,544 --> 00:08:56,880
Yeah, this is me speaking. Yeah.
202
00:08:56,905 --> 00:08:59,760
I can't do impressions. What?
I can't do it. I can't do it.
203
00:08:59,785 --> 00:09:02,449
Ah. It's quite here in the voice.
204
00:09:02,474 --> 00:09:04,319
Quite nasal? Yeah.
Is this a compliment?
205
00:09:04,344 --> 00:09:06,649
LAUGHTER
206
00:09:06,674 --> 00:09:09,680
Hello.
LAUGHTER
207
00:09:09,705 --> 00:09:12,680
Think we should get on.
Let's get on. OK. Get on.
208
00:09:12,705 --> 00:09:15,649
Let's start with two
very different approaches
209
00:09:15,674 --> 00:09:17,399
from two very similar people.
210
00:09:17,424 --> 00:09:19,649
It's Ardal and Judi. Here we go.
211
00:09:21,474 --> 00:09:24,569
So, this is my salon.
FUNKY MUSIC PLAYS
212
00:09:24,594 --> 00:09:26,010
You've been to the hairdresser.
213
00:09:26,035 --> 00:09:27,880
They wash your hair,
they don't do a good job.
214
00:09:27,905 --> 00:09:29,319
They leave shampoo in it.
215
00:09:29,344 --> 00:09:31,649
And I feel that this will
give everything
216
00:09:31,674 --> 00:09:33,240
a really, really good churn.
217
00:09:33,265 --> 00:09:35,680
I think it will thoroughly
clean the hair.
218
00:09:41,265 --> 00:09:43,010
CLOCHE DINGS
219
00:09:43,035 --> 00:09:45,319
Hello, hello, hello.
220
00:09:45,344 --> 00:09:47,649
I'd like a drink, please.
You want some juice of Love?
221
00:09:47,674 --> 00:09:49,290
Love juice? Yes, please.
222
00:09:49,315 --> 00:09:50,649
OK, OK.
223
00:09:59,625 --> 00:10:02,930
I mean, ideally you would have
the cement mixer plumbed.
224
00:10:02,955 --> 00:10:05,290
Plumbed? But we didn't really
have time to do that,
225
00:10:05,315 --> 00:10:07,649
so we're going to do it
the old—fashioned way.
226
00:10:10,035 --> 00:10:12,890
So, Linda, if you don't mind,
I'm going to, yeah, just put...
227
00:10:12,915 --> 00:10:15,170
LAUGHTER
Oh.
228
00:10:16,505 --> 00:10:19,120
Get that a bit closer.
229
00:10:19,145 --> 00:10:23,040
Ah, she's complete...she's in.
She's in.
230
00:10:23,065 --> 00:10:24,840
It's a lovely atmosphere
in the Love Bar.
231
00:10:24,865 --> 00:10:26,680
What? It's a lovely atmosphere.
MIXER GRINDS
232
00:10:26,705 --> 00:10:28,090
Yeah.
233
00:10:28,115 --> 00:10:30,810
I'm just going to shampoo it
with the best shampoo I could find.
234
00:10:32,955 --> 00:10:35,940
And is Linda...Linda's happy,
is she? She is happy, yeah. Yeah.
235
00:10:35,965 --> 00:10:37,760
LAUGHTER
236
00:10:40,195 --> 00:10:42,449
LAUGHTER
237
00:10:42,474 --> 00:10:44,690
MIXER GRINDS
238
00:10:50,395 --> 00:10:51,940
Woo! Woo!
239
00:10:56,635 --> 00:10:58,220
This is what gives it
that Love juice,
240
00:10:58,245 --> 00:11:01,170
cos it's got my nails in it. Mm.
LAUGHTER
241
00:11:01,195 --> 00:11:03,409
Cherry on the side. Lovely.
242
00:11:04,505 --> 00:11:06,300
All right, Linda. Here we go.
243
00:11:07,474 --> 00:11:09,090
LAUGHTER
It's OK.
244
00:11:09,115 --> 00:11:12,770
This is all...this is all part
of the...part of the plan.
245
00:11:12,795 --> 00:11:16,449
So, hair reunited with Linda.
LAUGHTER
246
00:11:17,604 --> 00:11:19,579
There you go, babes. Well,
thank you very much.
247
00:11:19,604 --> 00:11:21,170
Thank you. How much do I owe you?
248
00:11:21,195 --> 00:11:23,090
17 quid each.
249
00:11:23,115 --> 00:11:25,020
£34? Yeah.
250
00:11:25,045 --> 00:11:27,449
It's like a normal London bar,
babes.
251
00:11:27,474 --> 00:11:29,890
So, now I'm just going to put
a tiny colour in it.
252
00:11:29,915 --> 00:11:31,300
Oh, lovely.
253
00:11:31,325 --> 00:11:33,610
LAUGHTER
OK. There we go.
254
00:11:33,635 --> 00:11:35,050
APPLAUSE
255
00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:39,840
Well, I think we can deal
with judi's quite quickly.
256
00:11:39,865 --> 00:11:42,690
She tossed a few drinks
into a cement mixer,
257
00:11:42,715 --> 00:11:44,659
poured it out,
and made you drink it.
258
00:11:44,684 --> 00:11:45,690
How, was it?
259
00:11:45,715 --> 00:11:47,100
Disgusting.
260
00:11:47,125 --> 00:11:49,409
That's not what you said.
No, because you were there.
261
00:11:49,434 --> 00:11:50,529
That's not what you...
262
00:11:50,554 --> 00:11:52,529
Well... I was scared. Look...
..I'm here now.
263
00:11:52,554 --> 00:11:54,490
LAUGHTER
But I'm next to my big man.
264
00:11:54,515 --> 00:11:56,810
LAUGHTER
265
00:11:56,835 --> 00:11:59,329
You won that argument,
definitely.
266
00:11:59,354 --> 00:12:02,300
Look, come on, you know
what this world is like.
267
00:12:02,325 --> 00:12:04,170
Anything and everything can be
a bar.
268
00:12:04,195 --> 00:12:06,529
I could imagine a bar like
that. Yeah.
269
00:12:06,554 --> 00:12:08,300
It is a sort of... You could imagine
some prick...
270
00:12:08,325 --> 00:12:10,659
Of course! In Shore ditch or
somewhere like that.
271
00:12:10,684 --> 00:12:12,529
Some prick coming up with it, yeah.
Know what I mean?
272
00:12:12,554 --> 00:12:15,300
Oh, welcome to the Cement Mixer
Bar. Fuck. This is what I'm...
273
00:12:15,325 --> 00:12:18,890
Fuck you, you hipster pricks.
274
00:12:18,915 --> 00:12:20,250
Top idea.
275
00:12:20,275 --> 00:12:22,570
Ardal, what was
the blue stuff you sprayed in
276
00:12:22,595 --> 00:12:24,380
the client's hair afterwards?
277
00:12:24,405 --> 00:12:27,020
That was, like, one
of those Frubes.
278
00:12:31,635 --> 00:12:33,539
Why did you put a Frube in her hair?
279
00:12:33,564 --> 00:12:36,209
Is a question I never thought
I'd ask anyone.
280
00:12:36,234 --> 00:12:37,900
She wanted a colour, so I
281
00:12:37,925 --> 00:12:41,300
picked the nearest, like, colour
that I thought she'd like.
282
00:12:41,325 --> 00:12:44,100
Probably needs a little
fine-tuning.
283
00:12:44,125 --> 00:12:45,539
I'm so sorry to bring the mood down,
284
00:12:45,564 --> 00:12:48,850
but we need to fuel this madness via
consumerism now.
285
00:12:48,875 --> 00:12:50,490
That's the end of part one!
286
00:13:01,015 --> 00:13:03,040
Hello! Here we are again.
287
00:13:03,065 --> 00:13:05,710
It's part two, and it's time
for some more cement mixer action.
288
00:13:05,735 --> 00:13:09,630
Yes, but that action cannot under
any circumstances involve cement
289
00:13:09,655 --> 00:13:12,349
mixing, OK? I'm deadly
serious, guys,
290
00:13:12,374 --> 00:13:14,349
and that's because the best use
for a cement mixer,
291
00:13:14,374 --> 00:13:16,830
other than for mixing cement,
wins the task.
292
00:13:16,855 --> 00:13:18,760
We've seen two people's attempts.
293
00:13:18,785 --> 00:13:21,070
Now we're going to see two other
people's attempts.
294
00:13:21,095 --> 00:13:23,760
It's Bridget and Sophie.
295
00:13:23,785 --> 00:13:25,549
Even though we've been working
together for
296
00:13:25,574 --> 00:13:26,630
a certain amount of time,
297
00:13:26,655 --> 00:13:28,990
we don't really know or like
each other very much.
298
00:13:29,015 --> 00:13:32,510
Pardon? So, I thought that a good
way to counteract that,
299
00:13:32,535 --> 00:13:34,830
I've put together some ice—breakers.
300
00:13:34,855 --> 00:13:36,790
They're going to be mixed around by
the cement mixer,
301
00:13:36,815 --> 00:13:38,760
and then we can find out
a little bit more about you.
302
00:13:38,785 --> 00:13:39,990
Right, shall I give it a mix?
303
00:13:40,015 --> 00:13:41,020
Yeah.
304
00:13:41,045 --> 00:13:43,299
Around it goes.
305
00:13:43,324 --> 00:13:44,229
Ahh!
306
00:13:54,735 --> 00:13:59,020
What are we doing to our planet?
307
00:13:59,045 --> 00:14:01,710
We've only got one.
308
00:14:01,735 --> 00:14:04,150
Stop ruining it.
309
00:14:06,574 --> 00:14:08,020
Isn't that a horrible...?
310
00:14:08,045 --> 00:14:10,349
It's come out. Oh, OK!
All right.
311
00:14:10,374 --> 00:14:11,870
It's self—selected something.
312
00:14:11,895 --> 00:14:13,150
Blue. It's a compliment.
313
00:14:13,175 --> 00:14:14,479
Mm-hm.
314
00:14:15,655 --> 00:14:17,479
"You have kind eyes."
315
00:14:17,504 --> 00:14:19,790
Thank you.
316
00:14:19,815 --> 00:14:22,610
Right. Well, that was machine.
Can we have another go?
317
00:14:22,635 --> 00:14:23,770
Yeah. OK.
318
00:14:23,795 --> 00:14:25,289
Elon Musk,
319
00:14:25,314 --> 00:14:29,650
stop sending your cars
and stuff up into space.
320
00:14:29,675 --> 00:14:31,180
It's not what space is for.
321
00:14:31,205 --> 00:14:33,650
Just keep them on your drive.
322
00:14:33,675 --> 00:14:35,130
I've got a compliment and a
question.
323
00:14:35,155 --> 00:14:37,010
Ah, right.
324
00:14:37,035 --> 00:14:38,690
"You smell familiar."
325
00:14:38,715 --> 00:14:39,740
Compliment?
326
00:14:39,765 --> 00:14:40,930
Yeah, thank you. Yeah.
327
00:14:40,955 --> 00:14:44,850
Which previous Taskmaster contestant
would you raise as your own child?
328
00:14:44,875 --> 00:14:46,459
Hugh Dennis. Great.
329
00:14:46,484 --> 00:14:51,930
And all the bottles in the seas
and in all the fields
330
00:14:51,955 --> 00:14:54,409
and gardens, stop it!
331
00:14:54,434 --> 00:14:58,770
"Why don't you believe in yourself?"
332
00:14:58,795 --> 00:15:00,050
Good news?
333
00:15:00,075 --> 00:15:01,730
"You're going to die.
334
00:15:01,755 --> 00:15:03,130
"Sooner than you think."
335
00:15:03,155 --> 00:15:04,180
Ah. Yeah.
336
00:15:04,205 --> 00:15:06,620
Well, I was thinking 2050?
337
00:15:06,645 --> 00:15:10,100
No! No. No, you're
going to be long dead before then.
338
00:15:10,125 --> 00:15:12,539
Hmm. I liked the first couple.
339
00:15:12,564 --> 00:15:14,539
Yeah. OK.
340
00:15:14,564 --> 00:15:15,820
Bve- Bye-bye.
341
00:15:15,845 --> 00:15:17,130
Believe in yourself.
342
00:15:21,675 --> 00:15:23,260
Should I tell you what I saw?
343
00:15:23,285 --> 00:15:27,620
I saw a lunatic dressed as
a cowboy playing one note on
344
00:15:27,645 --> 00:15:28,620
a violin.
345
00:15:30,515 --> 00:15:32,370
Talk me through the rhyming scheme.
346
00:15:32,395 --> 00:15:33,459
Was there a rhyme?
347
00:15:33,484 --> 00:15:35,010
No.
348
00:15:36,675 --> 00:15:38,100
So, she did try to use
349
00:15:38,125 --> 00:15:40,409
the cement mixer as
a musical instrument...
350
00:15:40,434 --> 00:15:41,409
Yeah. ..and a metaphor.
351
00:15:41,434 --> 00:15:43,209
I think you'll find that that's
352
00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:45,010
going to be a cult number one hit.
353
00:15:45,035 --> 00:15:46,100
Oh, God!
354
00:15:46,125 --> 00:15:49,820
I don't think you can have
a cult number one hit.
355
00:15:49,845 --> 00:15:51,339
Anyway, let's you off the hook a
bit.
356
00:15:51,364 --> 00:15:53,339
Yeah. I mean, what,
yours was just mad.
357
00:15:53,364 --> 00:15:56,370
I just think there's not enough
space for tenderness on this show.
358
00:15:56,395 --> 00:15:57,620
Ooh.
359
00:15:57,645 --> 00:15:58,980
"You're going to die soon?"
360
00:16:00,675 --> 00:16:02,419
We're all going to die soon.
361
00:16:02,444 --> 00:16:03,850
What a weird collection!
362
00:16:03,875 --> 00:16:06,570
"Which contestant would you make
your child?"
363
00:16:06,595 --> 00:16:09,459
"Why don't you believe in yourself?"
It's just insane.
364
00:16:09,484 --> 00:16:11,780
I mean, it's not as insane as
someone plucking on a violin
365
00:16:11,805 --> 00:16:14,289
and saying "stop it".
366
00:16:14,314 --> 00:16:15,459
Who's left?
367
00:16:15,484 --> 00:16:19,820
There is just one little sausage
left, and it's Christopher Ramsey.
368
00:16:19,845 --> 00:16:22,060
WESTERN MUSIC
369
00:16:25,725 --> 00:16:27,500
Welcome to the sausage arena.
370
00:16:27,525 --> 00:16:28,570
Thank you.
371
00:16:30,395 --> 00:16:32,730
Your sausage is on the red stick
and ribbon.
372
00:16:32,755 --> 00:16:34,570
My sausage is on the blue stick
and ribbon.
373
00:16:34,595 --> 00:16:36,539
Matching with the headbands that
I've made.
374
00:16:36,564 --> 00:16:40,010
Now, the first person to swallow
375
00:16:40,035 --> 00:16:43,219
a piece of their sausage,
and only their sausage,
376
00:16:43,244 --> 00:16:44,289
wins.
377
00:16:44,314 --> 00:16:45,370
Goggles on.
378
00:16:47,725 --> 00:16:49,700
You ready? Are you set?
379
00:16:49,725 --> 00:16:50,780
I'm set.
380
00:16:50,805 --> 00:16:52,650
Spin those sausages.
381
00:16:52,675 --> 00:16:54,900
WESTERN SHOWDOWN MUSIC
382
00:17:03,805 --> 00:17:06,219
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
383
00:17:06,244 --> 00:17:08,219
LAUGHTER
384
00:17:11,285 --> 00:17:13,620
I'm too scared.
385
00:17:13,645 --> 00:17:15,500
Ahh!
386
00:17:17,165 --> 00:17:18,190
UV“!
387
00:17:18,215 --> 00:17:19,700
Ahh! Does it hurt?
388
00:17:19,725 --> 00:17:20,910
No, it's OK. It's OK.
389
00:17:28,725 --> 00:17:30,299
It's so fast.
390
00:17:30,324 --> 00:17:34,140
It's so much faster than
I thought it would be.
391
00:17:34,165 --> 00:17:35,219
Ahh!
392
00:17:49,725 --> 00:17:51,339
Oh, God!
393
00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:02,089
Oh, no, I've lost it!
394
00:18:07,805 --> 00:18:08,910
Why can't I get it?
395
00:18:08,935 --> 00:18:10,740
I swallowed some sausage.
396
00:18:16,015 --> 00:18:18,349
I don't know anyone who wouldn't
want to play sausage mixer.
397
00:18:18,374 --> 00:18:21,660
It was like a roller-coaster
with the sausages coming at you.
398
00:18:21,685 --> 00:18:23,630
So, for, like...
399
00:18:23,655 --> 00:18:26,780
Rarely have I seen
a sausage go from still
400
00:18:26,805 --> 00:18:28,380
to accelerating that fast.
401
00:18:28,405 --> 00:18:29,660
Yeah, well, I've Googled it.
402
00:18:29,685 --> 00:18:32,270
I don't think anyone has ever done
that before. I can't...
403
00:18:32,295 --> 00:18:35,380
Of course they haven't.
404
00:18:35,405 --> 00:18:36,910
This is what I think I've got to do.
405
00:18:36,935 --> 00:18:39,740
I've got to draw a gulf between
the greatest idea...
406
00:18:39,765 --> 00:18:40,860
Mm-hm. ..and the others.
407
00:18:40,885 --> 00:18:44,270
Oh. So, I'm going to give Ardal
and Sophie one point.
408
00:18:44,295 --> 00:18:46,299
Oh, that's nice. Yeah.
409
00:18:46,324 --> 00:18:49,860
Cos it's a very worthy cause
and powerful message,
410
00:18:49,885 --> 00:18:52,190
I'm going to give Bridget
two points.
411
00:18:52,215 --> 00:18:53,380
I'm going to give judi,
412
00:18:53,405 --> 00:18:55,020
because she's a great saleswoman
413
00:18:55,045 --> 00:18:57,580
and I could imagine some bell end in
414
00:18:57,605 --> 00:19:00,460
East London doing that,
three points.
415
00:19:00,485 --> 00:19:02,150
Then I'm leaving a gulf,
416
00:19:02,175 --> 00:19:03,380
and then I'm giving
417
00:19:03,405 --> 00:19:05,990
the sausage machine
the five points it truly deserves.
418
00:19:06,015 --> 00:19:07,270
Wow.
419
00:19:07,295 --> 00:19:10,099
OK, thank you very much.
420
00:19:10,124 --> 00:19:12,429
So, may we see a scoreboard, please?
421
00:19:12,454 --> 00:19:14,299
Bridget is at the bottom of
the leader board with three.
422
00:19:14,324 --> 00:19:15,860
Chris is at the top
with nine points.
423
00:19:15,885 --> 00:19:17,070
Ooh. There it is.
424
00:19:19,605 --> 00:19:21,630
Then let us have another one.
425
00:19:21,655 --> 00:19:25,940
Yes, and there's something strange
afoot in our little garden dome.
426
00:19:38,045 --> 00:19:39,070
Yes, Sophie.
427
00:19:39,095 --> 00:19:40,099
Hey. Hello.
428
00:19:40,124 --> 00:19:41,460
You may enter the fun zone.
429
00:19:41,485 --> 00:19:42,940
Ooh, thank you.
430
00:19:42,965 --> 00:19:44,190
Very echoey.
431
00:19:44,215 --> 00:19:45,590
SHE SINGS
432
00:19:47,655 --> 00:19:49,150
Thank you. That's enough.
433
00:19:49,175 --> 00:19:50,510
OK.
434
00:19:52,015 --> 00:19:57,950
OK. "Record the highest number on
this pedometer."
435
00:19:57,975 --> 00:19:59,870
"You have 20 minutes."
436
00:19:59,895 --> 00:20:01,710
"Your time starts now."
437
00:20:01,735 --> 00:20:04,200
I'm presuming this is
the pedometer and not that.
438
00:20:04,225 --> 00:20:08,020
OK, firstly, what is a pedometer?
439
00:20:08,045 --> 00:20:09,820
So, a pedometer counts your steps.
440
00:20:09,845 --> 00:20:11,460
OK.
441
00:20:11,485 --> 00:20:13,179
Do I have to do it in here?
442
00:20:13,204 --> 00:20:14,910
All the information's on
the task, Chris.
443
00:20:18,945 --> 00:20:21,270
You've not seen
a pedometer before, no?
444
00:20:21,295 --> 00:20:25,270
No...no, I didn't.
I never want to see one again.
445
00:20:25,295 --> 00:20:26,740
Have you never heard of
a pedometer?
446
00:20:26,765 --> 00:20:28,740
No, I've got, like, the watch
and stuff.
447
00:20:28,765 --> 00:20:31,280
I'm not used to
the old techy stuff.
448
00:20:31,305 --> 00:20:32,990
So, you're not used to
the old techy stuff,
449
00:20:33,015 --> 00:20:34,820
and you're not used to
the new techy stuff?
450
00:20:34,845 --> 00:20:36,559
I get carried everywhere.
451
00:20:39,095 --> 00:20:42,229
Let's crack on. OK, well, it's a
fairly classic Taskmaster task.
452
00:20:42,254 --> 00:20:46,179
I think first up, it's the basic
guys, Ardal and Chris.
453
00:20:46,204 --> 00:20:50,000
So, I need to find something that
takes a lot of steps.
454
00:20:51,175 --> 00:20:54,750
I could put the pedometer on
the foot—shaped thing.
455
00:20:54,775 --> 00:20:56,150
OK.
456
00:21:00,254 --> 00:21:01,710
Come on, man!
457
00:21:01,735 --> 00:21:04,000
It is warm in here.
458
00:21:04,025 --> 00:21:05,640
Ooh, it burns.
459
00:21:05,665 --> 00:21:07,000
Oh, my God!
460
00:21:08,735 --> 00:21:11,710
Oh, it's so hot!
461
00:21:11,735 --> 00:21:13,640
I mean,
I just can't wait to see the others.
462
00:21:13,665 --> 00:21:16,470
Like, they're just going to be
running around like fools.
463
00:21:16,495 --> 00:21:18,429
Ooh, this is horrible!
464
00:21:21,025 --> 00:21:23,549
Hmm, maybe I'll just pop out here.
465
00:21:23,574 --> 00:21:25,429
It doesn't say on there that
I've got to stay in here.
466
00:21:25,454 --> 00:21:26,959
I cannot stay in here.
467
00:21:26,984 --> 00:21:28,268
Ooh!
468
00:21:28,293 --> 00:21:30,109
Ooh, that...
I don't know why I did that!
469
00:21:30,134 --> 00:21:31,709
No, that was your choice.
470
00:21:31,734 --> 00:21:34,039
And if I do this, is that better?
471
00:21:39,173 --> 00:21:41,039
Do you think you're taking more or
fewer steps?
472
00:21:41,064 --> 00:21:43,068
I'm going to check now. OK.
473
00:21:43,093 --> 00:21:44,429
Oh, that's quite good.
474
00:21:44,454 --> 00:21:45,599
Like your... Like a yoyo.
475
00:21:45,624 --> 00:21:47,879
That helps.
476
00:21:47,904 --> 00:21:49,039
What's it on now?
477
00:21:49,064 --> 00:21:50,188
It's 172.
478
00:21:50,213 --> 00:21:52,068
Is there a limit on this?
479
00:21:52,093 --> 00:21:53,549
It doesn't go beyond
a certain number.
480
00:21:53,574 --> 00:21:54,909
I think it'll go beyond 172.
481
00:21:54,934 --> 00:21:57,959
It's 200 probably.
482
00:21:57,984 --> 00:21:59,239
Come on!
483
00:22:03,093 --> 00:22:05,469
Absolutely dripping.
484
00:22:09,904 --> 00:22:11,239
WHISTLE
485
00:22:13,264 --> 00:22:14,239
WHISTLE
486
00:22:15,574 --> 00:22:16,629
Congratulations.
487
00:22:16,654 --> 00:22:17,909
Ooh!
488
00:22:17,934 --> 00:22:19,318
Ooh, look at that!
489
00:22:19,343 --> 00:22:20,599
I'm worried about your health.
490
00:22:20,624 --> 00:22:22,039
Ooh, thank you so much!
491
00:22:25,654 --> 00:22:27,119
It was so hot.
492
00:22:28,264 --> 00:22:30,599
Chris, why did you commit to
the system that you chose?
493
00:22:30,624 --> 00:22:32,909
Walking around,
I feel I would've been more tired.
494
00:22:32,934 --> 00:22:33,989
I don't... I think...
495
00:22:34,014 --> 00:22:36,349
I would've had to have been, like,
sprinting on the spot,
496
00:22:36,374 --> 00:22:38,318
whereas I've only...
I was only moving my hand.
497
00:22:38,343 --> 00:22:41,239
Give me some stats
for Chris's loose wrist system.
498
00:22:41,264 --> 00:22:43,148
Yeah. Well, the loose wrist system
was very clever.
499
00:22:43,173 --> 00:22:48,429
He actually managed to do 2,789
steps in just 20 minutes,
500
00:22:48,454 --> 00:22:49,759
which is very impressive. Wow.
501
00:22:49,784 --> 00:22:51,559
So, about a mile
and a third in 20 minutes.
502
00:22:51,584 --> 00:22:55,198
Ooh, Chris,
you're getting on my nerves.
503
00:22:55,223 --> 00:22:56,629
Ardal... Yes?
504
00:22:56,654 --> 00:22:58,959
Interesting decision to use
505
00:22:58,984 --> 00:23:02,839
a wooden foot only in that you have
a real foot.
506
00:23:02,864 --> 00:23:04,119
I have a real foot. I mean,
507
00:23:04,144 --> 00:23:06,039
I didn't want to run around in
the heat.
508
00:23:06,064 --> 00:23:07,429
I feel I've done the world
509
00:23:07,454 --> 00:23:11,789
a service by showing that you can
get your steps in every day without
510
00:23:11,814 --> 00:23:14,119
actually having to move.
511
00:23:14,144 --> 00:23:15,989
He'd only done 172 after
ten minutes,
512
00:23:16,014 --> 00:23:19,789
but he sped up.
He got to 1,084 steps. Respectable.
513
00:23:19,814 --> 00:23:22,318
So, he managed to get past
the 200 limit.
514
00:23:22,343 --> 00:23:24,278
Yeah.
515
00:23:24,303 --> 00:23:26,278
We've seen a lot.
Let's have a break.
516
00:23:26,303 --> 00:23:27,709
If your partner's fallen asleep
517
00:23:27,734 --> 00:23:30,039
and is snoring next to you,
why not have a bit of fun...
518
00:23:30,064 --> 00:23:32,789
...and leave them?
519
00:23:32,814 --> 00:23:34,318
We'll see you after the break.
520
00:23:45,244 --> 00:23:47,759
Hello there, and welcome back
to Taskmaster!
521
00:23:47,784 --> 00:23:49,549
What was happening before
the break, Alex?
522
00:23:49,574 --> 00:23:52,549
There's a task in play in which
they're trying to record
523
00:23:52,574 --> 00:23:54,909
the highest number on
the pedometer provided.
524
00:23:54,934 --> 00:23:57,268
We've had the root one masters,
Ardal and Chris.
525
00:23:57,293 --> 00:24:02,479
Now for some alternative step-making
with Judi and Sophie.
526
00:24:02,504 --> 00:24:03,938
What can I strap this to?
527
00:24:03,963 --> 00:24:05,429
A bike.
528
00:24:05,454 --> 00:24:07,268
No, but then I've got to ride it.
529
00:24:07,293 --> 00:24:08,299
Mm-hm.
530
00:24:08,324 --> 00:24:09,349
Do you have a WY“?
531
00:24:09,374 --> 00:24:10,349
No.
532
00:24:12,093 --> 00:24:13,479
Can I get a drill, please?
533
00:24:13,504 --> 00:24:14,659
I'll get you a drill.
534
00:24:17,894 --> 00:24:20,839
That's not helping!
535
00:24:20,864 --> 00:24:22,119
Ooh...
536
00:24:22,144 --> 00:24:23,479
Ooh!
537
00:24:30,293 --> 00:24:32,629
A dog. Can you get me
a little puppy?
538
00:24:32,654 --> 00:24:34,948
Put it on the puppy,
the puppy can run up and down.
539
00:24:34,973 --> 00:24:36,068
I can get you a rat.
540
00:24:36,093 --> 00:24:38,039
I don't want a... A rat?
What kind of rat?
541
00:24:38,064 --> 00:24:39,198
A remote control rat.
542
00:24:39,223 --> 00:24:40,309
Yes!
543
00:24:43,814 --> 00:24:47,229
This is so much better.
544
00:24:47,254 --> 00:24:48,229
Oh, shit.
545
00:24:50,293 --> 00:24:52,589
Ah! No!
546
00:24:52,614 --> 00:24:55,509
That's it, that's it. Just go round,
just keep going round... Oh...
547
00:24:55,534 --> 00:24:56,629
Ah!
548
00:25:01,254 --> 00:25:02,278
Fuck...
549
00:25:02,303 --> 00:25:03,479
Wheels go up and down.
550
00:25:05,784 --> 00:25:08,789
Oh, that was so much cooler in
my head.
551
00:25:08,814 --> 00:25:09,839
Ten seconds.
552
00:25:09,864 --> 00:25:11,559
Wait!
553
00:25:14,144 --> 00:25:15,429
WHISTLE
554
00:25:16,814 --> 00:25:18,349
WHISTLE
555
00:25:19,864 --> 00:25:21,349
That's a really hard task,
that was.
556
00:25:21,374 --> 00:25:23,869
Yeah. Thanks, Judi.
557
00:25:27,584 --> 00:25:30,068
No!
558
00:25:30,093 --> 00:25:31,509
Yeah.
559
00:25:31,534 --> 00:25:33,869
I can't believe I got
480—something.
560
00:25:33,894 --> 00:25:36,198
Well, I'm amazed you got that many,
to be honest.
561
00:25:36,223 --> 00:25:37,398
Cos for the vast majority of it,
562
00:25:37,423 --> 00:25:40,309
you just put it on the back of
a remote control car,
563
00:25:40,334 --> 00:25:42,068
where it would've gotten no steps...
564
00:25:42,093 --> 00:25:43,999
Uh... ..because it's a car.
565
00:25:44,024 --> 00:25:46,039
I think that was a set-up.
566
00:25:46,064 --> 00:25:49,119
It was Alex that told me
I've got you a remote control.
567
00:25:49,144 --> 00:25:51,479
Well, you kept asking for a dog,
and I offered you a rat.
568
00:25:51,504 --> 00:25:54,429
So, look what I was asking
for — a dog that actually steps.
569
00:25:54,454 --> 00:25:55,639
Mm.
570
00:25:55,664 --> 00:25:58,278
Another conspiracy theory.
571
00:25:58,303 --> 00:26:00,759
Sophie's ideas were
a little more successful.
572
00:26:00,784 --> 00:26:04,078
You saw from the prize task,
I love power tools. I got a drill.
573
00:26:04,103 --> 00:26:05,999
Did that drill work when it was
whizzing around?
574
00:26:06,024 --> 00:26:07,509
Yes...Yes. Did that add?
575
00:26:07,534 --> 00:26:09,839
Yeah, she got into the thousands.
You got into the thousands?
576
00:26:09,864 --> 00:26:10,948
What did judi get?
577
00:26:10,973 --> 00:26:12,229
483.
578
00:26:12,254 --> 00:26:15,398
Sophie, 1,209.
579
00:26:15,423 --> 00:26:18,719
And she didn't expend as much
energy as Chris.
580
00:26:18,744 --> 00:26:20,509
And she looked cool and powerful
throughout.
581
00:26:20,534 --> 00:26:21,799
That's what she said.
582
00:26:21,824 --> 00:26:23,479
Oh, that's what she said?
583
00:26:24,864 --> 00:26:26,198
480... Yeah.
584
00:26:26,223 --> 00:26:29,919
I am so pissed off.
585
00:26:29,944 --> 00:26:33,278
You used a remote control rat.
586
00:26:33,303 --> 00:26:35,119
One left, Greg.
One left, let's go.
587
00:26:35,144 --> 00:26:37,669
Finally, it's Bridget.
All by herself.
588
00:26:37,694 --> 00:26:38,919
Whoopsie, oh, no.
589
00:26:41,614 --> 00:26:43,028
It's not moving.
590
00:26:43,053 --> 00:26:44,389
Well, you haven't taken any steps.
591
00:26:44,414 --> 00:26:45,669
I have. I just did some.
592
00:26:45,694 --> 00:26:46,948
Do you think you're stepping?
593
00:26:46,973 --> 00:26:49,278
I am stepping. Look.
594
00:26:49,303 --> 00:26:51,639
Step. Step, step,
step. That is a step.
595
00:26:51,664 --> 00:26:53,589
Well, you're not going very
far forward.
596
00:26:53,614 --> 00:26:56,919
I don't want to do this
for 20 minutes.
597
00:26:56,944 --> 00:26:58,278
Try going forward.
598
00:27:01,584 --> 00:27:02,669
23!
599
00:27:05,544 --> 00:27:08,278
But you're keeping very still.
600
00:27:08,303 --> 00:27:09,519
What do you mean?
601
00:27:09,544 --> 00:27:13,158
What, I've got to move around like
that?
602
00:27:13,183 --> 00:27:14,719
No, I think you just got to take...
603
00:27:14,744 --> 00:27:15,958
It's still on 84.
604
00:27:15,983 --> 00:27:17,769
But you haven't taken any
normal steps.
605
00:27:17,794 --> 00:27:18,999
Oh, my God!
606
00:27:21,264 --> 00:27:22,559
That's it.
607
00:27:26,384 --> 00:27:29,919
Oh. So, what I'm
going to do is record
608
00:27:29,944 --> 00:27:30,999
the biggest number that
609
00:27:31,024 --> 00:27:34,078
I know whilst on this pedometer.
610
00:27:34,103 --> 00:27:35,158
OK.
611
00:27:35,183 --> 00:27:37,489
I'm looking forward to this number.
Are you writing it down?
612
00:27:37,514 --> 00:27:38,719
I don't need to write it down. OK.
613
00:27:38,744 --> 00:27:41,439
Because you're recording it.
614
00:27:41,464 --> 00:27:43,999
A trillion gazillion.
615
00:27:44,024 --> 00:27:48,639
Have you thought of 2 trillion
gazillions? Are you stopping there?
616
00:27:48,664 --> 00:27:51,719
11 trillion gazillion.
617
00:27:51,744 --> 00:27:53,129
OK.
618
00:27:53,154 --> 00:27:54,208
How much longer is left?
619
00:27:56,544 --> 00:27:57,599
You're not wearing it.
620
00:27:57,624 --> 00:27:59,999
I don't need it
because I've got the number.
621
00:28:00,024 --> 00:28:02,319
OK, 139.
622
00:28:02,344 --> 00:28:05,078
If you say it's 139,
I'm... You're going to...
623
00:28:05,103 --> 00:28:06,569
I'm... I don't mind, actually.
624
00:28:06,594 --> 00:28:09,569
I'm just really happy in life.
I don't mind.
625
00:28:09,594 --> 00:28:10,879
Thank you, Bridget.
626
00:28:14,983 --> 00:28:18,009
It's not a question I expected
to ask after this task,
627
00:28:18,034 --> 00:28:19,239
but have you ever walked?
628
00:28:24,264 --> 00:28:27,009
If I walked normally,
it wouldn't count.
629
00:28:27,034 --> 00:28:29,369
That's cos you were holding it.
You were holding it.
630
00:28:29,394 --> 00:28:31,288
What do you mean if you walked
normally it wouldn't count?
631
00:28:31,313 --> 00:28:33,158
If I just did that, it wouldn't...
How do you know?
632
00:28:33,183 --> 00:28:35,569
But if I did that, then...
You didn't do that at any point.
633
00:28:35,594 --> 00:28:37,849
You just did this.
634
00:28:40,394 --> 00:28:42,729
At no point did you attempt
to walk.
635
00:28:42,754 --> 00:28:45,088
I did. And you were getting
exasperated with him.
636
00:28:45,113 --> 00:28:47,649
"Oh, I suppose I should walk like
this, then."
637
00:28:47,674 --> 00:28:49,439
Fascinating, Bridget.
638
00:28:49,464 --> 00:28:53,038
Well, I did record the most
amount of steps on a pedometer.
639
00:28:53,063 --> 00:28:54,569
And it wasn't even about steps.
640
00:28:54,594 --> 00:28:57,729
The task itself was, "Record the
highest number on this pedometer."
641
00:28:57,754 --> 00:29:02,088
She was on the pedometer, and she
recorded 11 trillion gazillion.
642
00:29:02,113 --> 00:29:03,088
That's a very high number.
643
00:29:03,113 --> 00:29:05,809
11 trillion is a number.
Gazillion, not so much.
644
00:29:05,834 --> 00:29:07,599
But it is a high number.
645
00:29:07,624 --> 00:29:09,929
And was she on a pedometer at
the time?
646
00:29:09,954 --> 00:29:11,649
Yes. Oh, my God.
647
00:29:11,674 --> 00:29:13,879
LAUGHING
648
00:29:16,784 --> 00:29:19,088
So there's some quite
contrasting numbers.
649
00:29:19,113 --> 00:29:20,449
Yeah.
650
00:29:20,474 --> 00:29:23,519
We go from Judi with 483,
Ardal about 1,000,
651
00:29:23,544 --> 00:29:27,489
Sophie 1,200, Chris 2,789,
652
00:29:27,514 --> 00:29:31,288
Bridget's either 11 trillion
gazillion or 139.
653
00:29:31,313 --> 00:29:34,319
I mean, fair play.
I think she has done it.
654
00:29:34,344 --> 00:29:36,929
Oh, my God. I think...
LAUGHTER
655
00:29:36,954 --> 00:29:38,809
I think I'm going to have to, uh,
allow it,
656
00:29:38,834 --> 00:29:40,679
and it's very clever
lateral thinking.
657
00:29:40,704 --> 00:29:45,889
But I would remind you
of how she walks day to day.
658
00:29:45,914 --> 00:29:47,489
If it gives you a little lift.
659
00:29:47,514 --> 00:29:51,958
I got beaten by someone recording
a number on...
660
00:29:51,983 --> 00:29:53,569
No, you got beaten by everyone.
661
00:29:53,594 --> 00:29:56,499
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
662
00:29:58,554 --> 00:30:00,208
So it's one point to Judi,
two to Ardal,
663
00:30:00,233 --> 00:30:02,929
three to Sophie, four to Chris,
and five to Bridget Christie.
664
00:30:02,954 --> 00:30:04,889
There it is!
665
00:30:07,193 --> 00:30:09,569
What is next,
my furry chum?
666
00:30:09,594 --> 00:30:13,249
Thank you. We have a task which
involves all 40 contestants.
667
00:30:25,954 --> 00:30:27,249
You look very comfortable.
668
00:30:27,274 --> 00:30:29,218
Well, I don't feel
very comfortable.
669
00:30:29,243 --> 00:30:31,529
Hold a meeting with yourselves.
670
00:30:31,554 --> 00:30:34,168
There must be eight of you at
the meeting.
671
00:30:34,193 --> 00:30:37,369
Most dramatic meeting moment wins.
672
00:30:37,394 --> 00:30:39,689
You have 20 minutes,
your time starts now.
673
00:30:39,714 --> 00:30:41,529
Right, so seven other mes.
674
00:30:41,554 --> 00:30:43,579
What sort of meeting do you think
you might do?
675
00:30:43,604 --> 00:30:45,939
I think I'll have a meeting of
the tennis club.
676
00:30:45,964 --> 00:30:47,399
Are they quite dramatic?
677
00:30:47,424 --> 00:30:49,759
This one's going to be
very dramatic.
678
00:30:49,784 --> 00:30:54,529
What I instantly thought
of was, like, your death.
679
00:30:54,554 --> 00:30:56,809
My death? Mm—hm. Right.
680
00:30:56,834 --> 00:30:59,218
APPLAUSE
681
00:31:01,504 --> 00:31:04,479
Pretty straightforward. Meetings
with a dramatic moment in them.
682
00:31:04,504 --> 00:31:07,659
Yes. And one of them will result in
your death.
683
00:31:07,684 --> 00:31:09,249
Yes, second time in the show.
684
00:31:09,274 --> 00:31:11,609
Couldn't be happier?
There's quite a nasty...
685
00:31:11,634 --> 00:31:13,088
It wasn't cos I, like, wanted him
to die.
686
00:31:13,113 --> 00:31:15,579
I just thought what would be the
saddest, most dramatic thing
687
00:31:15,604 --> 00:31:17,529
to happen to the show?
Ooh. OK, that's better.
688
00:31:17,554 --> 00:31:21,218
Nah, it'd just be collateral damage.
Let's crack on.
689
00:31:21,243 --> 00:31:24,968
OK, well, let's crack on with some
Chris Ramseys.
690
00:31:24,993 --> 00:31:26,579
This is his meeting moment.
691
00:31:28,993 --> 00:31:31,329
So, I'm sure you all know why
we're here.
692
00:31:31,354 --> 00:31:35,689
Some chocolate has been stolen,
and it was one of you greedy pricks.
693
00:31:35,714 --> 00:31:37,298
We're going to find out who.
694
00:31:37,323 --> 00:31:39,659
SNORING
I don't like to point fingers
695
00:31:39,684 --> 00:31:42,689
and I don't agree with any of this,
and I'm not going to rat anyone out.
696
00:31:42,714 --> 00:31:44,379
It's just not my style.
697
00:31:44,404 --> 00:31:47,129
Oh, if there was something in this,
I'd throw it at you.
698
00:31:49,404 --> 00:31:51,129
Chris, you've been very quiet.
699
00:31:51,154 --> 00:31:52,459
What?
700
00:31:54,354 --> 00:31:55,739
What's all this?
701
00:31:55,764 --> 00:31:56,848
See?
702
00:31:56,873 --> 00:31:58,048
Mm. See?
703
00:31:58,073 --> 00:31:59,809
Have I got any chocolate on my face?
704
00:31:59,834 --> 00:32:02,048
APPLAUSE
705
00:32:03,964 --> 00:32:07,298
I'm not... Genuinely not sure
what the dramatic moment was.
706
00:32:07,323 --> 00:32:09,739
Aw. All of it.
707
00:32:09,764 --> 00:32:12,379
There may not have been an
especially dramatic moment in it,
708
00:32:12,404 --> 00:32:15,659
but there was some rather quality
acting. Can you show the clip?
709
00:32:15,684 --> 00:32:17,968
Yeah, OK, here's some acting
from Chris.
710
00:32:17,993 --> 00:32:19,329
Oh, God.
711
00:32:19,354 --> 00:32:21,769
LAUGHING
712
00:32:24,234 --> 00:32:26,609
You've never met Carl,
but that's bang on.
713
00:32:28,404 --> 00:32:31,819
There was a start, there was a group
of different characters,
714
00:32:31,844 --> 00:32:34,609
there was some of the greatest
acting you'll see on a screen
715
00:32:34,634 --> 00:32:37,899
this year, so it wasn't a
complete disaster.
716
00:32:37,924 --> 00:32:39,899
I can't say there was especially
high drama.
717
00:32:39,924 --> 00:32:41,739
I don't know... Why's it still on?
718
00:32:43,844 --> 00:32:46,178
Let's crack on, who's next?
OK, the bar is set.
719
00:32:46,203 --> 00:32:50,579
We're now going to see
a few Bridgets. Here we go.
720
00:32:50,604 --> 00:32:53,459
Glutinous? Yeah.
Guilty? Yeah.
721
00:32:53,484 --> 00:32:55,409
Scared?
722
00:32:55,434 --> 00:32:59,259
Annoyingly self-deprecating?
Overly sensitive?
723
00:32:59,284 --> 00:33:00,259
Vain?
724
00:33:01,434 --> 00:33:03,379
Shame?
725
00:33:03,404 --> 00:33:07,739
Great. Thanks for coming, guys, very
brave and honest of you. Good work.
726
00:33:07,764 --> 00:33:09,129
Glutinous,
727
00:33:09,154 --> 00:33:12,489
just have two biscuits
and then put the packet back.
728
00:33:12,514 --> 00:33:16,329
Guilty, Catholic,
I'm afraid I can't help you there.
729
00:33:16,354 --> 00:33:19,409
Scared, you know what,
what's the worst that can happen?
730
00:33:19,434 --> 00:33:22,489
Just do it. Overly sensitive,
you know what,
731
00:33:22,514 --> 00:33:25,978
be sensitive. Uh, just not overly.
732
00:33:27,484 --> 00:33:30,178
Annoyingly self-deprecating,
733
00:33:30,203 --> 00:33:33,019
you've got to stop this cos it
annoys everybody.
734
00:33:33,044 --> 00:33:35,819
Some things you've done have been
all right.
735
00:33:35,844 --> 00:33:39,489
Vain, you'd think now, by 50,
736
00:33:39,514 --> 00:33:41,409
you would've got on top of this.
737
00:33:41,434 --> 00:33:44,019
Just... That's... You can't change
it now.
738
00:33:44,044 --> 00:33:45,129
Shame.
739
00:33:49,564 --> 00:33:51,949
But thanks for coming everyone,
though. Really, I don't
740
00:33:51,974 --> 00:33:55,259
want to get rid of any
of you cos you make me me.
741
00:33:55,284 --> 00:33:57,209
Just try
and get on top of it a little bit.
742
00:33:57,234 --> 00:34:00,419
APPLAUSE
743
00:34:03,873 --> 00:34:07,669
It's certainly very clever idea
to... Mm. ..look inwardly
744
00:34:07,694 --> 00:34:11,209
and to consider the many facets
of your own character.
745
00:34:11,234 --> 00:34:14,848
Uh, the only dramatic moment in it,
as far as I could work out,
746
00:34:14,873 --> 00:34:16,699
was when a bird flew past the camp.
747
00:34:16,724 --> 00:34:18,419
LAUGHTER
748
00:34:20,203 --> 00:34:22,819
There was... I think what I did
was I didn't...
749
00:34:22,844 --> 00:34:25,139
I should've overacted, uh...
750
00:34:25,164 --> 00:34:28,619
Oh, the mistake you made was
that you didn't do the task.
751
00:34:28,644 --> 00:34:31,178
Yeah. Yeah.
752
00:34:31,203 --> 00:34:32,389
Who's next?
753
00:34:32,414 --> 00:34:35,178
Next we're going to see
the impressionist Sophie Duker.
754
00:34:35,203 --> 00:34:36,419
Good luck, everyone.
755
00:34:45,594 --> 00:34:48,108
BARKING
756
00:34:48,133 --> 00:34:51,949
Dog! Right,
we all know why we're here.
757
00:34:51,974 --> 00:34:56,819
Because my worthless assistant,
little Alex Horne, is dead.
758
00:34:56,844 --> 00:34:59,139
SCOTTISH ACCENT: Oh, no, I cannae
believe it.
759
00:34:59,164 --> 00:35:00,699
Murdered.
760
00:35:00,724 --> 00:35:04,499
Yes, murdered. So who did it?
761
00:35:04,524 --> 00:35:06,389
Babe, not me.
762
00:35:06,414 --> 00:35:08,749
I definitely didn't do it.
763
00:35:08,774 --> 00:35:11,389
Oh, all right, I killed
your assistant.
764
00:35:12,444 --> 00:35:15,749
But only because he was so annoying.
765
00:35:15,774 --> 00:35:17,389
Bridget, Bridget, Bridget,
766
00:35:17,414 --> 00:35:20,829
you have killed the
Taskmaster's assistant,
767
00:35:20,854 --> 00:35:22,339
and in so doing,
768
00:35:22,364 --> 00:35:25,139
you have proved yourself worthy
to be
769
00:35:25,164 --> 00:35:28,389
the next Taskmaster's assistant.
770
00:35:28,414 --> 00:35:32,308
Take this clipboard and this pen.
771
00:35:32,333 --> 00:35:35,749
And welcome to Taskmaster.
772
00:35:35,774 --> 00:35:37,669
APPLAUSE
773
00:35:44,164 --> 00:35:45,938
LAUGHTER
774
00:35:47,003 --> 00:35:48,108
Is that... Is that OK?
775
00:35:48,133 --> 00:35:50,499
Yeah, good. Wow.
776
00:35:53,883 --> 00:35:55,749
Some lovely character work.
777
00:35:55,774 --> 00:35:57,579
Chris Ramsey... Mm.
Nailed it.
778
00:35:57,604 --> 00:35:59,549
...absolutely spot-on.
779
00:35:59,574 --> 00:36:01,419
And the moment of high drama?
780
00:36:01,444 --> 00:36:03,029
Uh, when, uh,
781
00:36:03,054 --> 00:36:04,829
Bridget caught the clipboard.
782
00:36:04,854 --> 00:36:08,029
An aerial passage of power...
Yeah. ..of Taskmaster...
783
00:36:08,054 --> 00:36:11,469
There was an aerial passage of
powers. ...to the new TMA.
784
00:36:11,494 --> 00:36:12,829
First place so far?
785
00:36:12,854 --> 00:36:15,349
Oh, God, yeah. OK. Good stuff.
786
00:36:15,374 --> 00:36:18,419
Don't worry, everybody, there's only
one part left until somebody has
787
00:36:18,444 --> 00:36:21,499
to celebrate on stage with
Ardal O'Hanlon's tea towel.
788
00:36:21,524 --> 00:36:24,938
Are you not entertained?
See you after the break.
789
00:36:24,963 --> 00:36:27,269
APPLAUSE
790
00:36:33,953 --> 00:36:37,858
Hello, welcome back for
the final time this episode.
791
00:36:37,883 --> 00:36:40,699
Before the break, our cast were all
having meetings with themselves.
792
00:36:40,724 --> 00:36:43,058
Yes, there had to be eight
of themselves in the meeting
793
00:36:43,083 --> 00:36:46,058
and the most dramatic meeting
moment wins.
794
00:36:46,083 --> 00:36:49,649
We're off to the tennis club now
with Ardal O'Hanlon.
795
00:36:49,674 --> 00:36:52,649
SOBBING
796
00:36:52,674 --> 00:36:54,749
OK, settle down. As chairman,
797
00:36:54,774 --> 00:36:57,108
I'd like to call this meeting
to order.
798
00:36:57,133 --> 00:37:00,108
SOBBING
Before we go any further, chairman,
799
00:37:00,133 --> 00:37:03,289
some gob shite's blocking
the Bentley.
800
00:37:03,314 --> 00:37:07,619
Oh, I'm so sorry.
That's me. Excuse me.
801
00:37:09,133 --> 00:37:12,419
Uh, I just want to say, chairman,
the greens are in a terrible state.
802
00:37:12,444 --> 00:37:14,899
I'm sorry. This is the tennis club.
803
00:37:14,924 --> 00:37:19,978
Oh, tennis club, I shouldn't be
here. Silly me.
804
00:37:20,003 --> 00:37:23,469
Well, well, good riddance.
Your backhand was terrible.
805
00:37:23,494 --> 00:37:27,139
Well, Mr Chairman, I think it's time
I revealed my true identity.
806
00:37:28,494 --> 00:37:31,369
I'm an undercover police officer.
807
00:37:31,394 --> 00:37:35,269
And I'm arresting you
for embezzlement and murder.
808
00:37:35,294 --> 00:37:39,019
More importantly,
I'm resigning from the club.
809
00:37:39,044 --> 00:37:41,659
APPLAUSE
810
00:37:44,654 --> 00:37:46,219
Wow. Dramatic.
811
00:37:46,244 --> 00:37:48,579
Crazy drama. A lot going on.
812
00:37:48,604 --> 00:37:52,988
It seems that embezzlement was
a far bigger crime than murder.
813
00:37:53,013 --> 00:37:56,419
Embezzlement! And murder. Yeah.
LAUGHTER
814
00:37:56,444 --> 00:37:58,299
It's extra drama. Little bit extra.
815
00:37:58,324 --> 00:38:00,139
Who was the character
that was crying?
816
00:38:00,164 --> 00:38:01,988
That was the...
817
00:38:02,013 --> 00:38:04,469
That was the treasurer because...
818
00:38:04,494 --> 00:38:06,188
LAUGHTER
819
00:38:07,444 --> 00:38:09,779
APPLAUSE
820
00:38:11,574 --> 00:38:14,058
Very good. Yeah, there was a golf
player in the wrong club.
821
00:38:14,083 --> 00:38:16,909
I was excited by that. Oh, my God.
Someone had to move the Bentley.
822
00:38:16,934 --> 00:38:20,779
Was he doing the wrong sport? Yeah.
I almost spat my tea. Who's next?
823
00:38:20,804 --> 00:38:22,219
All right, there's only one left.
824
00:38:22,244 --> 00:38:25,829
Finally, it must be Love.
Here she is.
825
00:38:25,854 --> 00:38:27,579
Um, some of us have joined
this meeting
826
00:38:27,604 --> 00:38:29,938
because we've got a bit of
an issue with Billy.
827
00:38:29,963 --> 00:38:31,738
Um, Mrs Mitch am,
do you want to lead?
828
00:38:31,763 --> 00:38:35,188
I mean, Billy is an absolute twit.
829
00:38:35,213 --> 00:38:39,829
Excuse me, I'm not happy about you
speaking bout my husband like this.
830
00:38:42,124 --> 00:38:45,779
Oi, Siobhan! You're calling me
a twit,
831
00:38:45,804 --> 00:38:48,269
but I bet you didn't tell him
you're having my baby.
832
00:38:51,404 --> 00:38:54,068
I knew it. I knew it, cos I saw
them the other day.
833
00:38:54,093 --> 00:38:57,219
Remember when I phoned you the other
day, you're sitting there all quiet
834
00:38:57,244 --> 00:38:59,068
and recording, but I saw you the
other day,
835
00:38:59,093 --> 00:39:00,579
and I was telling you that I
saw him.
836
00:39:00,604 --> 00:39:02,429
And her.
837
00:39:02,454 --> 00:39:04,829
Billy, no!
838
00:39:04,854 --> 00:39:07,219
APPLAUSE
839
00:39:12,494 --> 00:39:14,269
Wow. Bag of dramas.
840
00:39:14,294 --> 00:39:15,629
Bags of drama.
841
00:39:15,654 --> 00:39:19,988
Affairs, stealing people's
men, gossiping.
842
00:39:20,013 --> 00:39:21,738
Was there a troublesome child?
843
00:39:21,763 --> 00:39:24,019
The troublesome child is in
the belly.
844
00:39:25,893 --> 00:39:29,349
I mean, with that, you'd want to see
what happens next, wouldn't you?
845
00:39:29,374 --> 00:39:31,068
Yeah.
846
00:39:31,093 --> 00:39:32,149
LAUGHTER
847
00:39:32,174 --> 00:39:34,868
All right, do you want to go from
least dramatic to most dramatic?
848
00:39:34,893 --> 00:39:38,188
I do. Sorry, Bridget, I really
enjoyed your self-analysis,
849
00:39:38,213 --> 00:39:39,659
but there wasn't a lot of drama
in it,
850
00:39:39,684 --> 00:39:41,429
so I can only give you one point.
Right. OK.
851
00:39:41,454 --> 00:39:43,789
Chris, that's one of the greatest
acting performances
852
00:39:43,814 --> 00:39:46,149
I've ever seen in my life. You take
that home with you tonight.
853
00:39:46,174 --> 00:39:47,909
Plus two points. Two points.
854
00:39:47,934 --> 00:39:50,629
Um, there was one moment
of high drama in it,
855
00:39:50,654 --> 00:39:51,909
and I very much liked it,
856
00:39:51,934 --> 00:39:54,229
and I enjoyed the image
of you being hurt. Oh.
857
00:39:54,254 --> 00:39:55,299
Sophie gets three points.
858
00:39:55,324 --> 00:39:57,738
Sophie three, OK,
so it's between Judi and Ardal.
859
00:39:57,763 --> 00:40:02,229
Just because of the sheer stoking
of hysteria thatjudi pulled off,
860
00:40:02,254 --> 00:40:03,909
I think I'm going to give her
the five.
861
00:40:03,934 --> 00:40:05,269
Oh, my God!
862
00:40:05,294 --> 00:40:07,589
Judi's won a task.
Five points to Judi Love.
863
00:40:07,614 --> 00:40:09,818
APPLAUSE
864
00:40:11,404 --> 00:40:12,629
Finally!
865
00:40:12,654 --> 00:40:14,459
Let's have a quick look at
the scores.
866
00:40:14,484 --> 00:40:16,839
Of course. Well, Ardal's now in
second place with 12,
867
00:40:16,864 --> 00:40:18,818
but Chris is still in the lead
with 15 points.
868
00:40:18,843 --> 00:40:21,068
APPLAUSE
869
00:40:22,454 --> 00:40:25,029
OK, everyone, please, for a change,
870
00:40:25,054 --> 00:40:28,629
stay where you are for
the final task of the show.
871
00:40:28,654 --> 00:40:30,309
Ooh.
872
00:40:34,944 --> 00:40:37,229
Who will read the task?
873
00:40:37,254 --> 00:40:39,589
I've hidden the task under one
of their chairs.
874
00:40:39,614 --> 00:40:41,198
Chris's chair.
GREG GASPS
875
00:40:41,223 --> 00:40:42,868
He's acting.
LAUGHTER
876
00:40:42,893 --> 00:40:47,279
He's there. Now, that's acting.
That's acting.
877
00:40:47,304 --> 00:40:49,919
"Correctly guess this person's
first name.
878
00:40:49,944 --> 00:40:54,349
"You must ask a yes or
a no question on your turn.
879
00:40:54,374 --> 00:40:57,149
"If you take more than ten seconds
to ask your question,
880
00:40:57,174 --> 00:41:01,029
"you miss a go. The person who
guesses correctly wins five points."
881
00:41:01,054 --> 00:41:03,389
Simple as that. So there's only one
winner of this one.
882
00:41:03,414 --> 00:41:05,709
We're going to start with Ardal,
move down the line.
883
00:41:05,734 --> 00:41:07,149
Rotate!
884
00:41:07,174 --> 00:41:09,429
APPLAUSE
885
00:41:09,454 --> 00:41:10,748
Ooh.
886
00:41:15,054 --> 00:41:17,669
Ardal, your ten seconds start now.
887
00:41:17,694 --> 00:41:21,429
Are you a French trapeze artist?
888
00:41:21,454 --> 00:41:22,789
No.
889
00:41:22,814 --> 00:41:24,719
I mean, what sort of fucking
opener was that?
890
00:41:24,744 --> 00:41:26,559
LAUGHTER
891
00:41:26,584 --> 00:41:28,509
Bridget. ls your name Andrew?
892
00:41:28,534 --> 00:41:29,789
No.
893
00:41:29,814 --> 00:41:31,309
God Almighty.
894
00:41:31,334 --> 00:41:33,149
LAUGHTER
895
00:41:33,174 --> 00:41:35,029
Chris, your turn.
896
00:41:35,054 --> 00:41:37,309
Does your name begin with a vowel?
897
00:41:37,334 --> 00:41:38,828
No.
898
00:41:38,853 --> 00:41:40,706
Thanks, Chris.
899
00:41:40,731 --> 00:41:41,877
Judi.
900
00:41:41,902 --> 00:41:43,786
Has one of the royals got your name?
901
00:41:43,811 --> 00:41:46,067
No. Damn it.
902
00:41:46,092 --> 00:41:47,147
Sophie.
903
00:41:47,172 --> 00:41:49,757
Is your name longer than four
letters long?
904
00:41:49,782 --> 00:41:51,156
Yes. Good question.
905
00:41:51,181 --> 00:41:52,597
OK. Ardal.
906
00:41:52,622 --> 00:41:57,786
Does your name begin with a letter
that starts after K?
907
00:41:57,811 --> 00:41:59,467
LAUGHTER
908
00:41:59,492 --> 00:42:00,597
Yes.
909
00:42:00,622 --> 00:42:03,317
Bridget. ls your name
gender—neutral?
910
00:42:03,342 --> 00:42:04,956
No. Chris.
911
00:42:04,981 --> 00:42:06,877
Does your name begin with an S?
912
00:42:06,902 --> 00:42:08,067
No.
913
00:42:08,092 --> 00:42:11,427
Judi. ls your name Pimpernickel?
914
00:42:11,452 --> 00:42:13,706
LAUGHTER
915
00:42:13,731 --> 00:42:16,036
No.
916
00:42:16,061 --> 00:42:19,987
Is your name more than
three syllables?
917
00:42:20,012 --> 00:42:21,147
No.
918
00:42:21,172 --> 00:42:23,836
Ardal. Does your name begin with any
of the last five letters
919
00:42:23,861 --> 00:42:25,267
of the alphabet? No.
920
00:42:25,292 --> 00:42:26,706
Oh. Ah, nice. Good.
921
00:42:26,731 --> 00:42:28,237
OK, we're making progress.
922
00:42:28,262 --> 00:42:29,267
Q. R, S, T...
923
00:42:29,292 --> 00:42:31,706
Bridget. ls your name embarrassing?
924
00:42:31,731 --> 00:42:33,706
No. Chris.
925
00:42:33,731 --> 00:42:36,317
Is your name Luigi?
926
00:42:36,342 --> 00:42:37,477
No. judi.
927
00:42:37,502 --> 00:42:40,197
Is your name Quantum?
928
00:42:45,012 --> 00:42:46,147
ALEX: She's pointing.
929
00:42:46,172 --> 00:42:48,597
Is your name Quantum?
930
00:42:48,622 --> 00:42:50,956
No.
LAUGHTER
931
00:42:50,981 --> 00:42:53,267
Sophie. Do you think it's likely
there's someone else
932
00:42:53,292 --> 00:42:54,706
in this room with your name? No.
933
00:42:54,731 --> 00:42:57,036
For those of you wondering,
the answer is, yep,
934
00:42:57,061 --> 00:42:58,677
we're staying here till we get it.
935
00:42:58,702 --> 00:43:00,507
LAUGHTER
936
00:43:00,532 --> 00:43:01,786
English?
937
00:43:01,811 --> 00:43:03,277
Sportsperson? Leonardo.
938
00:43:03,302 --> 00:43:05,147
German? Famous in the UK?
939
00:43:05,172 --> 00:43:07,427
Xavier. Barrick. Tiger.
940
00:43:07,452 --> 00:43:08,627
Obama. Double letters in it?
941
00:43:08,652 --> 00:43:10,507
A verb? Zebedee?
942
00:43:10,532 --> 00:43:12,427
Begin with an O? Shakespeare?
943
00:43:12,452 --> 00:43:14,757
End with a vowel? No.
944
00:43:14,782 --> 00:43:17,527
Is your name Maximus? Vlad?
Ludwig. German?
945
00:43:17,552 --> 00:43:19,117
No. No. No. No.
946
00:43:19,142 --> 00:43:21,477
Listen, it's not up to me,
but I would suggest
947
00:43:21,502 --> 00:43:24,147
it would be a good thing to do to
find out
948
00:43:24,172 --> 00:43:27,147
which letter his name begins with.
LAUGHTER
949
00:43:27,172 --> 00:43:28,347
Ardal.
950
00:43:28,372 --> 00:43:30,637
Uh, it, yeah, does it be...
HE STAMMERS
951
00:43:32,061 --> 00:43:33,477
Does your letter...
952
00:43:33,502 --> 00:43:35,786
Does your name begin with...
BUZZER
953
00:43:35,811 --> 00:43:37,247
Oh, my God!
954
00:43:37,272 --> 00:43:39,117
Oh, my God!
955
00:43:41,452 --> 00:43:42,677
Sorry.
956
00:43:42,702 --> 00:43:45,427
OK, let's go again. Bridget.
957
00:43:45,452 --> 00:43:46,836
M? No.
958
00:43:46,861 --> 00:43:49,117
Thank you. I? No.
959
00:43:49,142 --> 00:43:50,197
N? No.
960
00:43:50,222 --> 00:43:51,607
Q? Yes.
961
00:43:51,632 --> 00:43:54,607
Now, listen, this is a genuine
chance for Ardal here.
962
00:43:54,632 --> 00:43:56,557
Is your name Quinney?
LAUGHTER
963
00:43:56,582 --> 00:43:58,477
No. Shit.
964
00:43:58,502 --> 00:44:00,077
Bridget. Quasimodo.
965
00:44:00,102 --> 00:44:01,786
No.
966
00:44:01,811 --> 00:44:03,557
Chris. Quantus.
967
00:44:03,582 --> 00:44:04,716
No.
968
00:44:04,741 --> 00:44:06,437
Judi. Quiz. No.
969
00:44:06,462 --> 00:44:07,716
It's not Quiz.
970
00:44:09,302 --> 00:44:11,786
And just, by the way,
this is the 75th question.
971
00:44:14,582 --> 00:44:15,716
Sophie.
972
00:44:15,741 --> 00:44:17,997
Is your name Quentin?
973
00:44:18,022 --> 00:44:19,197
Yes.
974
00:44:19,222 --> 00:44:21,607
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
975
00:44:25,102 --> 00:44:27,867
So, five points, finally, to Sophie.
976
00:44:27,892 --> 00:44:29,277
APPLAUSE
977
00:44:30,532 --> 00:44:33,077
Thank you to Quentin.
Your task is complete.
978
00:44:33,102 --> 00:44:34,357
Goodbye.
979
00:44:37,222 --> 00:44:39,197
How has that affected
the final scores, Alex?
980
00:44:39,222 --> 00:44:43,607
Well, that swift game of
Guess The Name
981
00:44:43,632 --> 00:44:45,997
meant that Sophie leapt up in
the places
982
00:44:46,022 --> 00:44:49,687
and she's now in joint first place
with Chris Ramsey.
983
00:44:49,712 --> 00:44:52,046
APPLAUSE
984
00:44:53,741 --> 00:44:55,607
Exciting. A tie-breaker.
985
00:44:55,632 --> 00:44:58,916
There is a tie-breaker, and for this
one, they had to sing "I've won"
986
00:44:58,941 --> 00:45:02,687
in a low voice, and then "this
tie—break" in a high voice.
987
00:45:02,712 --> 00:45:04,966
Greatest vocal range wins.
988
00:45:04,991 --> 00:45:06,607
Here's how they got on.
989
00:45:06,632 --> 00:45:09,046
SOPHIE SIGHS,
GRUNTS
990
00:45:09,071 --> 00:45:11,357
See, I'm a Geordie, so when I get
angry, high goes...
991
00:45:11,382 --> 00:45:13,077
HIGH PITCH: ..high when I get angry.
992
00:45:13,102 --> 00:45:16,077
Ahh. Ah.
993
00:45:16,102 --> 00:45:17,557
0K, OK.
CLEARS THROAT
994
00:45:17,582 --> 00:45:19,327
SHE SQUEAKS
OK.
995
00:45:19,352 --> 00:45:20,687
DEEP VOICE: # I've... #
996
00:45:20,712 --> 00:45:22,046
DEEP VOICE: # Won... #
997
00:45:22,071 --> 00:45:23,157
HIGH VOICE: # This... #
998
00:45:23,182 --> 00:45:24,916
HIGH VOICE: # Tie—break. #
999
00:45:24,941 --> 00:45:26,437
WHISTLE BLOWS
1000
00:45:26,462 --> 00:45:28,767
Bye.
APPLAUSE
1001
00:45:28,792 --> 00:45:29,767
Thank you, Chris.
1002
00:45:34,152 --> 00:45:36,046
Manage to get that furball
out eventually?
1003
00:45:36,071 --> 00:45:37,637
Yeah, yeah, yeah, just...
GREG GROWLS
1004
00:45:37,662 --> 00:45:38,997
Well, they both did very well.
1005
00:45:39,022 --> 00:45:42,997
Chris went from an F2 to an F5.
That's 21 notes.
1006
00:45:43,022 --> 00:45:46,846
Sophie from an A2 to an E6.
1007
00:45:46,871 --> 00:45:49,407
As we all know, that's 25 notes.
1008
00:45:49,432 --> 00:45:51,637
APPLAUSE
1009
00:45:54,302 --> 00:45:56,327
Sophie Duker wins.
1010
00:45:56,352 --> 00:46:00,357
Please head up to coolly
collect your calming items.
1011
00:46:00,382 --> 00:46:03,207
APPLAUSE
1012
00:46:03,232 --> 00:46:04,357
Woo!
1013
00:46:04,382 --> 00:46:05,796
So what have we learnt today?
1014
00:46:05,821 --> 00:46:08,127
We've learnt that you've go
to look after yourself,
1015
00:46:08,152 --> 00:46:09,687
take care to look after you.
1016
00:46:09,712 --> 00:46:11,487
Get out there, exercise.
1017
00:46:11,512 --> 00:46:15,327
Actually, that reminds me, I'm still
ten steps short of my target
1018
00:46:15,352 --> 00:46:18,357
for today, so if you don't mind...
1019
00:46:18,382 --> 00:46:21,007
LAUGHTER
1020
00:46:24,951 --> 00:46:29,327
And now for some celebrations with
tonight's winner, Sophie Duker.
1021
00:46:29,352 --> 00:46:31,877
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1022
00:46:54,821 --> 00:46:58,157
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