1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,320 This programme contains strong language and adult humour 2 00:00:05,360 --> 00:00:07,400 SHE LAUGHS 3 00:00:07,440 --> 00:00:08,720 No way! 4 00:00:10,560 --> 00:00:11,800 Er... Gosh! 5 00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:13,360 Where's the hole? 6 00:00:13,400 --> 00:00:14,840 Honk, honk! 7 00:00:14,880 --> 00:00:16,680 Urgh! Ahh! Uhh! 8 00:00:16,720 --> 00:00:19,200 Are you having a laugh? 9 00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:20,480 Oh! 10 00:00:23,240 --> 00:00:24,800 THEY GASP 11 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:33,480 CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 12 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:35,880 Hello, and welcome! 13 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:42,400 Welcome to the Taskmaster Series 13 grand final! 14 00:00:42,440 --> 00:00:45,000 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 15 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:51,160 It has been an incredible journey. 16 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:55,000 We've all seen athleticism, mental agility, 17 00:00:55,040 --> 00:00:57,360 and chess grand master tactics - 18 00:00:57,400 --> 00:00:59,800 just not on this programme. 19 00:00:59,840 --> 00:01:03,640 But we have seen five fine comedians trying their very best. 20 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:05,240 Who will rise to the top? 21 00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:07,280 Who will become the emperor of nonsense, 22 00:01:07,320 --> 00:01:08,960 the crown prince of the pointless, 23 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,040 the monarch of being a right silly billy? 24 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:15,160 Only time will tell. Let us greet them for the last time. 25 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:17,600 Ardal O'Hanlon... CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 26 00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:20,440 ..Bridget Christie... CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 27 00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:22,560 ..Chris Ramsey... CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 28 00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:24,880 ..Judi Love... CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 29 00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,560 ..and Sophie Duker! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 30 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:31,680 And next to me, my faithful servant - 31 00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:34,560 a man who once told me after a few drinks that he has 32 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:38,080 a separate bank account that his wife doesn't know about. 33 00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:40,400 HIGH-PITCHED: It's little Alex Horne! 34 00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:43,520 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 35 00:01:44,720 --> 00:01:47,400 THEY GROWL 36 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,440 So up for this! Oh, man, you seem really pumped. 37 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:52,280 Ahh! 38 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:54,600 Ah, you love a final, don't you? 39 00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:55,880 Love a final! Ohh. 40 00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:58,120 I'm wearing my combat pre-ripped suit. 41 00:01:58,160 --> 00:01:59,760 And I'm ready, so let's... Cool. 42 00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:00,920 Let's just do it, Greg. 43 00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:03,120 You look really cool. Ahh! Let's just do it! 44 00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:05,320 LAUGHTER 45 00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:09,440 I had a Lucozade, shall we start? 46 00:02:09,480 --> 00:02:12,840 What is the final prize task category of the series, please? 47 00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:17,360 They've been asked to bring in the finest family heirloom. 48 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:19,320 Ooh! AUDIENCE OOHS 49 00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:22,920 Exactly. The finest family heirloom, in your opinion, will gain five 50 00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:24,120 fine points for its owner. 51 00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:26,680 And, at the end of this episode, the person with the most points 52 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:28,240 will take home their family heirloom 53 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:30,440 and four other people's family heirlooms, 54 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:33,520 which feels so wrong, it must be right. 55 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:36,040 So, sell me your family heirlooms. Christopher. 56 00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:41,760 My finest family heirloom is an antique Italian coffee table. 57 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:44,040 It sounds very stylish. AUDIENCE OOHS 58 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:45,800 It is. Here it is. 59 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:51,240 It was purchased by my mum's mum and dad in the '70s, I believe. 60 00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:53,800 Surprisingly tasteful for a '70s item. 61 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:56,240 Yeah. You open the top of that bad boy, 62 00:02:56,280 --> 00:02:59,040 and it plays the theme from The Godfather. 63 00:02:59,080 --> 00:03:00,840 Ooh. 64 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:04,200 That is a strong opener. 65 00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:08,560 Sophie, can you beat a coffee table that plays the Godfather theme? 66 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:10,000 I think I can. 67 00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:13,600 It's not Italian... but it is a rice cooker. 68 00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:16,240 LAUGHTER 69 00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:19,800 Oh, my God! No. 70 00:03:19,840 --> 00:03:22,680 ARDAL: I hope it plays music when you open it. 71 00:03:22,720 --> 00:03:25,320 There's an ancient African proverb. 72 00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:28,640 It goes, "There is rice at home." 73 00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:31,200 When you're a little kid and you go out to the shops, 74 00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:33,240 and you see a chocolate bar, your mum's like, 75 00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:34,680 "There's rice at home." 76 00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:36,880 You see a margherita pizza, your mum's like, 77 00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:38,120 "There's rice at home." 78 00:03:38,160 --> 00:03:41,600 - You see a PlayStation - rice. - Rice. LAUGHTER 79 00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:44,080 Is this the actual rice cooker from when you were a child? 80 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:46,520 This is the actual rice cooker from when I was a child. 81 00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:49,120 That's quite cute. It's never made imperfect rice, 82 00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:52,480 and it fills up not just my belly but my soul. 83 00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:54,400 Wow...wow! 84 00:03:54,440 --> 00:03:56,600 Don't try and emotionally manipulate him. 85 00:03:56,640 --> 00:03:57,800 I've gotta be honest, Ardal - 86 00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:00,280 she's done a pretty good job of emotionally manipulating me. 87 00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:03,120 Your turn, though. Oh, shit. Can you do the same? 88 00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:06,360 Erm, I brought a, erm, a biscuit tin. 89 00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:07,960 Whoa. Hm. 90 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,600 I inherited that from my mother, who got it from her mother. 91 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:15,280 And her mother, er, as a baby, arrived in Ireland 92 00:04:15,320 --> 00:04:20,520 with very few possessions in 1917, when Europe was in turmoil. 93 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:22,120 That's good. 94 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:25,160 And it's what's in the biscuit tin, I suppose, is what's really relevant 95 00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:26,960 and what's really poignant. 96 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:30,520 What we were told it was, was my granny's papers, her birth cert. 97 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:33,440 You shorten that, do you? Just interesting that you short... 98 00:04:33,480 --> 00:04:36,120 A birth cert. You shortened birth certificate. 99 00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:38,960 Birth certificate, like, I mean, we've got lots of time, 100 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,760 I can use the full word. 101 00:04:41,800 --> 00:04:42,800 LAUGHTER 102 00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:45,320 So, the trouble with you is, there's part of me that thinks 103 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:46,840 you've just made all of that up. 104 00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:48,640 So, I don't mock your ancestry, do I? 105 00:04:48,680 --> 00:04:51,920 Do I go on about the Welsh giants you were descended from? 106 00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:55,480 LAUGHTER 107 00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:58,760 I'll take some time to decide whether I believe any of that. 108 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:02,560 Bridget. The most precious thing that has been handed down... 109 00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:04,840 ..is DNA. 110 00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:08,000 My proudest achievement, the thing that is most precious... 111 00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:10,320 Excuse me, can I just - and I hate to interrupt so early... 112 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:12,360 Oh, no, that is very rude. You've just... 113 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:14,760 He made me say the whole word for "cert," so I think 114 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:16,680 the least you could do is... 115 00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:19,920 LAUGHTER ..DNA. 116 00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:21,880 What, deoxyribonucleic acid? 117 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:24,800 CHEERING 118 00:05:24,840 --> 00:05:28,440 APPLAUSE Oh-ho-ho! 119 00:05:28,480 --> 00:05:31,120 In your face, Ardal! 120 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:34,040 My proudest achievement is my children. 121 00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:41,560 I have brought a box with my children's teeth and hair, 122 00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:44,800 and umbilical cord stumps, and pregnancy kits in it. 123 00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:46,880 Yes, she has. And there it is. 124 00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:52,640 And when they've gone, I will have that, and... 125 00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:54,280 CHRIS: Unless you lose tonight. 126 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:55,560 LAUGHTER 127 00:05:55,600 --> 00:06:01,120 Then it will be given away to one of four virtual strangers. 128 00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:03,760 Well, I don't think they'll want it. 129 00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:05,920 LAUGHTER 130 00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:07,680 It is very touching. Judi? 131 00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:09,760 JUDI: My family heirloom... 132 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:11,520 LAUGHTER 133 00:06:11,560 --> 00:06:14,200 ..is my blood. 134 00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:15,560 AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS 135 00:06:15,600 --> 00:06:18,960 We're really pushing what kids want to inherit. 136 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:22,800 Well, the reality is my blood's been passed down from generation 137 00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:25,120 to generation, to generation. 138 00:06:25,160 --> 00:06:27,360 And it will continue to pass down. 139 00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:29,840 And if they need more, I can give them more. 140 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:33,320 LAUGHTER 141 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:39,280 Under what circumstances would your children need a vial of your blood? 142 00:06:39,320 --> 00:06:42,720 A medical thing, a ritual thing. 143 00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:47,840 And that blood is going to carry on a legacy. 144 00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:52,320 Cos it'll be in my kid's body, their kid's body... 145 00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:55,040 Yeah, but it's already in them. What's this necklace? 146 00:06:55,080 --> 00:06:58,120 LAUGHTER 147 00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:05,840 This necklace is if my blood starts to disappear. 148 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:10,520 They can still have my blood. 149 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:14,440 Just so you know, you can store blood for 42 days. 150 00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:16,880 Do you want to... LAUGHTER 151 00:07:16,920 --> 00:07:18,360 Do you want to judge? 152 00:07:18,400 --> 00:07:22,400 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 153 00:07:24,800 --> 00:07:27,840 The least obvious heirloom is probably 154 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:30,400 a small bottle of blood. 155 00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:34,360 But I've got to recognise what an amazing bullshitter Judi Love is. 156 00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:35,760 I'm going to give her 2 points. 157 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:37,040 Ah. OK. 158 00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:40,880 I really want a coffee table that plays The Godfather. 159 00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:42,920 I was touched by the rice maker. 160 00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:46,520 I've chosen to believe Ardal's biscuit tin story. 161 00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:48,960 So, I'm going to give them all 4 points. OK. 162 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:52,920 But Bridget's - when I saw that little box, I thought, 163 00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:55,880 "Even in many years, I'd be touched by that." 164 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:58,480 And I'm going to give Bridget a sweet 5. 165 00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:00,720 There we go. Bridget Christie gets 5 points! 166 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:02,480 APPLAUSE 167 00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:06,600 All right. Right, let's get this final properly under way! 168 00:08:06,640 --> 00:08:07,920 Yes, here we go. 169 00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:11,760 And this is the perfect task to whet the appetite. 170 00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:28,200 Ooh! 171 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:31,360 SHE SNIFFS Hello, Judi. 172 00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:34,520 What is that damn smell? What do you think it is? 173 00:08:34,560 --> 00:08:36,800 I don't know. Smells like potato. 174 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:39,800 Oh. 175 00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:42,720 Oh, it just comes off. 176 00:08:42,760 --> 00:08:44,080 Ahh. 177 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:47,320 Whew. 178 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:52,160 "Identify the liquids." 179 00:08:52,200 --> 00:08:55,560 "Most accurately identified liquids wins." 180 00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:56,800 "You have ten minutes." 181 00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,520 "Your time starts now." 182 00:08:58,560 --> 00:09:00,240 This is foul. 183 00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:02,560 CHRIS: Oh, shut up man. There's summat in there. 184 00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:05,800 Oh, that is grotesque. 185 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:07,480 Am I supposed to be tasting stuff? 186 00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:10,680 All the instructions are on the items. OK. 187 00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:13,400 Liquid identification is a... 188 00:09:13,440 --> 00:09:15,000 I would say it's a forte of mine. 189 00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:19,360 It's just the main liquids, though. 190 00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:20,960 What are the five main liquids? 191 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:26,160 The brandy, the water... and the milk. 192 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:28,600 Er, they're the only three I'm familiar with. 193 00:09:30,840 --> 00:09:33,720 GREG: Ardal's right, of course, there are only three liquids - 194 00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:35,960 the brandy, the water, and the milk. 195 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:39,760 So, it shouldn't be hard to track them down. 196 00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:41,040 Let's crack on. 197 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:44,000 OK, well, let's crack on with Chris and Bridget. 198 00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:48,960 BRIDGET: "You may only spray the perfume on your wrist." 199 00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:51,760 Pickled onion. 200 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,080 That's the water from a jar of pickled onions. 201 00:09:57,520 --> 00:10:00,520 Well, that's...it might be vinegar. 202 00:10:00,560 --> 00:10:02,000 "You may only spray the sponge" - 203 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:04,080 but then, I can do whatever I want with the sponge. 204 00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:05,960 What do you want to do with the sponge? 205 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:08,120 Sniff it, lick it, tell it I love it. 206 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:13,640 I think it's like lemon squash, or something. 207 00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:16,720 It's like a strawberry... rosy pink lemonade, kind of thing. 208 00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:21,600 "You may only squeeze the pipette into your mouth." 209 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,080 Is it Pot Noodle water? 210 00:10:33,280 --> 00:10:34,520 Is it beef stock? 211 00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:40,880 It's like watery soy sauce. 212 00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:42,800 OK, I'll put that down. OK. 213 00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:45,240 "You may only push the valve with the chopstick." 214 00:10:45,280 --> 00:10:47,520 That's ridiculous - and it's warm! 215 00:10:47,560 --> 00:10:49,800 It's warm. Why is it warm? 216 00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:51,200 Oh, crikey! 217 00:10:55,800 --> 00:10:57,280 Old tea, I think. 218 00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:00,520 Still got four minutes. 219 00:11:00,560 --> 00:11:01,960 That's tea. Ah. 220 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:04,400 "You can do whatever you want with the balloon." 221 00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:07,640 Just smells like a balloon. 222 00:11:07,680 --> 00:11:09,760 That looks absolutely revolting. 223 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:11,320 Oh, it's got bits in it! 224 00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:15,040 BALLOON SQUELCHES 225 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:17,200 AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS 226 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:24,280 Oh, there it is. What the hell is that? 227 00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:27,320 AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS 228 00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:32,320 Mm...what are them bits? 229 00:11:32,360 --> 00:11:34,000 Oh, what's happening? 230 00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:38,360 What is that? 231 00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:41,480 It smells like, like a... a yeasty thing. 232 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:43,760 But why is it that texture? 233 00:11:43,800 --> 00:11:45,720 Is "balloon juice" a thing? 234 00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:47,840 WHISTLE BLOWS Bugger. 235 00:11:47,880 --> 00:11:49,720 Well, I've written "balloon juice". 236 00:11:49,760 --> 00:11:51,200 HE GROANS 237 00:11:51,240 --> 00:11:55,160 APPLAUSE 238 00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:58,480 "Is balloon juice a thing" is going in the Taskmaster Book of Quotes. 239 00:11:58,520 --> 00:12:00,000 Congratulations. Thank you. 240 00:12:00,040 --> 00:12:04,080 And I really loved, "It's warm, why is it warm?!" 241 00:12:04,120 --> 00:12:06,640 Erm, just start telling me what they did successfully. 242 00:12:06,680 --> 00:12:08,480 They both got tea, 'course they did. 243 00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:11,760 Vinegar - Chris actually located it to a jar of pickled onions, 244 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:13,160 which is very impressive. 245 00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:15,640 He also got stock - he said it was beef stock. 246 00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:17,720 It was vegetable stock. That's fair. 247 00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:19,880 I think we have to acknowledge the word "stock". 248 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:22,360 So, I think Bridget got two. Chris got three. 249 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:25,760 Right, we're stopping again. Right now, watch...now! 250 00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:27,560 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 251 00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:35,680 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 252 00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:40,560 Hello, and welcome back to our Series 13 final! 253 00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:42,120 CHEERING 254 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:43,960 Yes, nearly there, and then, 255 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:46,000 it's the wrap party afterwards, isn't it? 256 00:12:46,040 --> 00:12:47,920 I've heard there's a wrap party. 257 00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:50,880 But I still haven't had my invite to the wrap party. 258 00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:58,440 Bef...before the break, everyone was trying to identify 259 00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,160 the liquids we prepared for them. 260 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:03,680 Now, here's how Sophie, Ardal, and Judi got on. 261 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:11,880 Urgh! Uh... 262 00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:13,240 Tastes like chicken soup. 263 00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,240 That is stock of some sort. 264 00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:18,280 I would say it's a beef stock? 265 00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:20,400 The more accurate, the better. Feel free to... 266 00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:23,240 Right, a Charolais cow - beef stock from a Charolais cow. 267 00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:28,720 That's a fruit juice. 268 00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:30,960 Could be passion fruit? 269 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:35,800 That smells like lychee... fizzy drink. 270 00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:38,520 It's like...lychee juice. 271 00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:43,240 It smells like... like onion vinegar. 272 00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:49,240 I don't want to spray this on my wrist. 273 00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:50,680 Vinegar. 274 00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:54,360 Oh. Smell like a packet of salt-and-vinegar crisps. 275 00:13:57,400 --> 00:13:59,560 That is liquidised crisps. 276 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:02,760 What flavour? It's prawn cocktail. 277 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:04,480 But liquidised? Yeah. 278 00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:06,440 Oh. 279 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:08,400 SNIFFS LOUDLY 280 00:14:10,040 --> 00:14:11,920 Tea. Tea? Yeah. 281 00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:18,000 You have six-and-a-half minutes. OK. 282 00:14:18,040 --> 00:14:20,560 All right, I believe in you. 283 00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:22,400 I'm going to leave it till last. 284 00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:25,280 "You can do whatever you want with the balloon." 285 00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:27,760 AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS 286 00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:39,160 AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST 287 00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:46,000 Ohh! 288 00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:48,200 SLOWED-DOWN: Ooh! 289 00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:54,240 SHE SCREAMS 290 00:14:56,840 --> 00:14:59,080 I hate you so much! Right, yeah. 291 00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:07,320 That smells like vomit. 292 00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:09,440 Oh, don't, don't...don't be crazy. 293 00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:10,800 That is renk! 294 00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:15,000 Mushroom, it's mushroom soup. 295 00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:17,040 That is mushroom soup. 296 00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:19,440 "You may only push the valve with the chopstick." 297 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:23,080 OK, should've done that one before the mushroom soup. 298 00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:24,400 Pop the... 299 00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:28,200 Sophie. 300 00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:30,560 That's just the lid of the valve. 301 00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:33,440 You can take it off. Thank you for telling me. 302 00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:39,280 That is very strong tea. Right. 303 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:40,800 That's tea. OK. 304 00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:43,000 So, it's really just the pipette. 305 00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:46,480 It's slightly fizzy. 306 00:15:46,520 --> 00:15:48,480 It tastes like ass. 307 00:15:48,520 --> 00:15:51,120 Is it Dr Pepper? WHISTLE BLOWS 308 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:53,240 Shall we leave it at that. I think so, yeah. 309 00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:54,960 I mean, I'm covered in it. 310 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:56,280 So sorry. 311 00:15:58,160 --> 00:16:00,840 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 312 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:05,920 So sweet, watching you trying to get the lid off a bicycle valve 313 00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:07,600 with some chopsticks. 314 00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:11,320 It's like you're playing a whole different game of Taskmaster. 315 00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:13,240 I spent, like, about five minutes doing that. 316 00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:14,840 Yeah, you did. But you did well. 317 00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:17,720 Got lychee, got tea, got mushroom soup, got onion vinegar. 318 00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:19,120 ARDAL: Well, you helped her. 319 00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:21,560 You gave her an extra clue that you didn't give any of us. 320 00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:25,000 What was the clue? He told you that you could use your hand to open 321 00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:28,040 the lid on the valve thing of the tyre. 322 00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:31,480 You would still be there with those chopsticks trying to get that off 323 00:16:31,520 --> 00:16:34,360 if it wasn't for his intervention. I'd have figured it out eventually. 324 00:16:34,400 --> 00:16:36,760 I've got to be honest, Ardal - since you've come out here in 325 00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:39,800 that red leather jacket, you've developed a real attitude. 326 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:42,920 And you were reckless with the balloon pop. 327 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:44,520 You were more reckless than I thought - 328 00:16:44,560 --> 00:16:46,480 especially as you thought it was vomit. 329 00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:49,160 Really and truly, it could've been classed as vomit, 330 00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:52,520 cos once it burst, it started to mix with all the other stuff. 331 00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:54,600 And that's really what vomit is. 332 00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:56,640 That's what vomit is. Yeah. 333 00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:59,560 I didn't realise that your nose was such a powerful weapon 334 00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:00,600 in your arsenal. 335 00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:03,040 Lychee - straight. Yeah. 336 00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:04,320 Genuinely impressive. 337 00:17:04,360 --> 00:17:07,440 So, a very cautious woman who's only choosing to use one sense. 338 00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:09,520 Mm-hm. Did pretty well. Yes. 339 00:17:09,560 --> 00:17:13,880 By stark contrast, Ardal just seemed hungry. 340 00:17:13,920 --> 00:17:16,960 LAUGHTER 341 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,440 He got the tea, he got stock, he got mushroom soup - 342 00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:21,320 so 3 for Ardal. 343 00:17:21,360 --> 00:17:26,120 Judi got lychee, vinegar, tea - so that's another 3 points. 344 00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:28,120 Lovely. Sophie got the most, she got four. 345 00:17:28,160 --> 00:17:31,040 Ardal, Judi, and Chris all got three, Bridget two. 346 00:17:31,080 --> 00:17:33,800 So, 3 to Bridget, 4 to Ardal, 4 to Judi, 4 to Chris, 347 00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:37,560 - and 5 to Sophie! - Easy. CHEERING 348 00:17:37,600 --> 00:17:40,680 I would like a nice early scoreboard, please, Alex. 349 00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:43,680 OK, well, we're all hoping Judi will win an episode finally, 350 00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:45,840 but she's currently in last place with 6 points, 351 00:17:45,880 --> 00:17:47,800 and Sophie's in the lead with 9 points! 352 00:17:47,840 --> 00:17:50,040 APPLAUSE 353 00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:52,480 Give me another one! 354 00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:54,120 Of course! Well, here they come. 355 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:57,440 Three wheels, two horns, a bell, and a vast quantity of ducks. 356 00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:15,680 JUDI: Alex? 357 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,360 Where's Alex? 358 00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:20,920 Alex always helps. Alex! 359 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,720 CHRIS: Hm. Arrows. 360 00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:27,360 ARDAL: Ducks. 361 00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:29,960 Can never have enough ducks. 362 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:33,280 I feel like ducks are my natural enemy. 363 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:36,680 Sometimes people mispronounce my name as Sophie Duck-er 364 00:18:36,720 --> 00:18:38,000 and I hate it. 365 00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:42,840 Oh, no. 366 00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:46,120 "Get the most ducks in Alex's basket." 367 00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:48,360 "You may only hold one duck at a time." 368 00:18:48,400 --> 00:18:51,080 "If Alex rings his backwards bell, 369 00:18:51,120 --> 00:18:54,960 "you must walk backwards until he honks his forwards horn." 370 00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:58,640 "Alex will pedal as fast as he can unless you say 371 00:18:58,680 --> 00:19:00,440 "one of the magic words." 372 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:04,440 "If you say a magic word, Alex will rest for ten seconds." Oh. 373 00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:08,480 "All the magic words are single-use magic words." 374 00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:11,400 "Alex will cycle round the circuit for ten minutes." 375 00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:15,160 "Your time starts when Alex honks his horn." 376 00:19:16,680 --> 00:19:20,360 BRIDGET: You can only hold one at a time. 377 00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:21,720 No, surely not. 378 00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,280 GREG: Good. Can I ask you before we watch this - 379 00:19:25,320 --> 00:19:28,080 did you regret this task once you had to cycle lots? Yes. 380 00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:31,440 I've been told that you were in a great deal of pain. Yes. 381 00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:34,280 And I am very much looking forward to it. Right. 382 00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:35,560 Who are we going to see first? 383 00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:37,480 It's Ardal and Chris up first. 384 00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:40,120 That's right, the basic boys ride again! 385 00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:43,600 "Backwards bell, forwards horn." 386 00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:46,280 Magic words. 387 00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:48,000 Just random magic words? HORN HONKS 388 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:49,360 Oh, my God! 389 00:19:51,120 --> 00:19:53,760 Ah! Alex, come back. 390 00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:54,800 HORN HONKS 391 00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:08,480 Ah. 392 00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:09,520 Here I come. 393 00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:12,000 I don't know the magic words. I don't know what they are. 394 00:20:12,040 --> 00:20:14,160 No. Shazam. 395 00:20:15,360 --> 00:20:17,000 Abracadabra. 396 00:20:17,040 --> 00:20:18,320 Monkey! 397 00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:22,200 BELL RINGS Abracadabra? 398 00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:24,560 No, it's not one of the magic words? No. 399 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:32,240 Er, fiddlesticks? No. 400 00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:34,240 Flash. BELL RINGS 401 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:36,400 HORN HONKS 402 00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:38,480 Where are these magic words?! 403 00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:40,200 Shoes. No. 404 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:41,920 Quack. Closer. 405 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:44,480 Annoying? 406 00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:46,560 BRAKES SQUEAL Ohh! 407 00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:49,360 APPLAUSE 408 00:20:59,120 --> 00:21:00,640 That was...that was nice. 409 00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:05,560 Duck? Nearly. 410 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:06,600 BELL RINGS Ducky? 411 00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,000 BRAKES SQUEAL 412 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:12,400 Duckling? No. 413 00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:17,080 Goose? Headboy? 414 00:21:17,120 --> 00:21:18,440 Headboy? 415 00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:20,760 Architecture. 416 00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:25,600 CHRIS LAUGHS I hate you! I absolutely hate you! 417 00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:30,320 BELL RINGS Oh, God. 418 00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:32,280 You still looking for the magic word? Yeah. 419 00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:33,520 OK. 420 00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:38,640 This is absolutely horrible. 421 00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:40,080 Ah...ten seconds. 422 00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:46,920 HORN HONKS, BELL RINGS 423 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:50,160 PANTING: You're a psychopath... you're a psychopath. 424 00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:53,200 APPLAUSE 425 00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:55,680 Feel really disappointed about not getting the magic words. 426 00:21:55,720 --> 00:21:57,520 You still looking for the magic words? Yeah. 427 00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:58,800 OK. 428 00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,720 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 429 00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:03,800 A fairly impressive start, I would say. 430 00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:05,800 Which magic words were identified? 431 00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:08,280 Ardal incorrectly shouted "architect". 432 00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:10,240 Well, he shouted 45 things. 433 00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:12,400 Have you got a list? Of course I've got a list. 434 00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:15,400 He started well with shazam, abracadabra, and monkey. 435 00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:16,880 The three big magic words. Yeah. 436 00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:20,400 Very quickly with things like blazers, trouble, shoes, sausages. 437 00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:22,720 So, he didn't get any of the magic words, but he said... 438 00:22:22,760 --> 00:22:25,000 Well, I was very close. You were very close, you were. 439 00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:27,080 I mean, I wanted you to get one so I could have a rest, 440 00:22:27,120 --> 00:22:28,280 but you didn't get any. 441 00:22:28,320 --> 00:22:30,360 But Chris did. Chris got "annoying" and "ducky". 442 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:33,040 All right, I won't tell you any numbers yet, Greg. All right, then. 443 00:22:33,080 --> 00:22:34,720 We've seen them beetle about after me - 444 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:37,080 but now, it's Sophie and me, and Bridget, and a trike, 445 00:22:37,120 --> 00:22:38,400 and some ducks! 446 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:43,320 HORN HONKS 447 00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,320 Oh, he's honked his horn. Right. 448 00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:55,320 Oh, one at a time - that can't be right, can it? 449 00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:58,400 I should probably be doing it in a different way, I think. 450 00:22:58,440 --> 00:23:00,240 BELL RINGS 451 00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:03,400 Ah. Now...mm... 452 00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:05,120 Hello. 453 00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:10,360 You all right? 454 00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:17,880 Ahh! Quite a lot of ducks left over there. 455 00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:19,640 Oh, is "ducky" a magic word? 456 00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:21,520 BRAKES SQUEAL 457 00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:24,280 How long do you have to stay there for? Seven more seconds. 458 00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:25,960 Not sure you're making the most of it. 459 00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,160 Is there anything I can use to keep you in... 460 00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:29,680 Oh, can I take it off? 461 00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:30,920 I've got to go now. 462 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:38,440 APPLAUSE 463 00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:40,720 BELL RINGS 464 00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:42,680 Sophie. Yeah? I don't want to run you over. 465 00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:46,400 I have to follow those arrows. PANTING: OK...uh-huh. 466 00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,320 BELL RINGS You have to walk backwards now. 467 00:23:56,360 --> 00:23:58,320 Yeah, but I'm here doing this, I'm busy. 468 00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:00,800 Yeah - oh. 469 00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:06,120 It's frustrating cos the arrows are pointing at each other now. 470 00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:09,000 HORN HONKS 471 00:24:09,040 --> 00:24:11,360 APPLAUSE 472 00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:14,840 I don't like this. 473 00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:16,920 Doing really well. Thank you. 474 00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:18,400 HORN HONKS 475 00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:24,120 HORN HONKS 476 00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:26,720 SHE GIGGLES 477 00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:28,720 Frustrating. Thanks, Bridget. 478 00:24:28,760 --> 00:24:31,160 Bye-bye, thank you so much. No, thank you. 479 00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:34,600 BOTH PANTING 480 00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:38,880 You wrote the task. 481 00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:40,920 You didn't have to make yourself do that. 482 00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:42,480 I do everything for him. 483 00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:45,440 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 484 00:24:47,520 --> 00:24:49,760 That is probably a sad indictment on my life, 485 00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:52,720 that I found "I do everything for him" genuinely touching. 486 00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:54,800 AUDIENCE AWWS 487 00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:57,360 JUDI: Ah, that's so sweet! 488 00:24:57,400 --> 00:25:00,480 Erm, there was genius moves going on there. 489 00:25:00,520 --> 00:25:05,120 I thought the reversing of the arrows so that this fool 490 00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:08,560 had to spin before you was delightful. 491 00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:10,960 And Bridget, the ripping off of the basket... 492 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:12,560 I didn't know it would come off. 493 00:25:12,600 --> 00:25:14,080 I almost stood up and cheered. 494 00:25:14,120 --> 00:25:15,720 LAUGHTER 495 00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:19,200 Cos I knew this tosspot had to carry on cycling round, 496 00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:21,360 while you stacked the b... 497 00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:24,240 My grandmother used to call me a tosspot, genuinely. 498 00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:26,520 Yeah? And then, I thought about what that might mean. 499 00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:29,600 What is a tosspot? A thing you toss odds and sods into... 500 00:25:29,640 --> 00:25:32,800 Oh, OK, I was thinking too much about it, right. 501 00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:35,480 Right, let's leave things there a moment and have a rest. 502 00:25:35,520 --> 00:25:37,520 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 503 00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:47,560 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Hello! 504 00:25:47,600 --> 00:25:48,920 Thank you, welcome back. 505 00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:52,280 And listen up - the competition will soon be over, but I refuse 506 00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:55,600 to let things continue until I've seen Judi Love try to fill 507 00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:57,520 a basket on a trike with ducks. 508 00:25:57,560 --> 00:26:00,840 You're in luck, Greg, but I do first want to remind you that they can 509 00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:03,120 only hold one duck at a time. 510 00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:04,800 AUDIENCE OOHS 511 00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:07,760 Here we go, it's Judi Love! 512 00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:09,200 HORN HONKS 513 00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:12,760 Hello, Judi. Can you stop, please? 514 00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:14,800 Not unless you say a magic word. 515 00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:15,840 Thank you? 516 00:26:15,880 --> 00:26:17,840 BRAKES SQUEAL Oh! 517 00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:24,200 Hello, Judi. Hello. 518 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:25,560 Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh. 519 00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:28,400 Are you all right? Yeah, I'm all right, I'd like to cycle. 520 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:31,600 Judi... 521 00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:35,200 The chain's come off. 522 00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:36,680 Broken the bike. 523 00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:40,280 I need to mend the bike. 524 00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:43,360 HE STRUGGLES 525 00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:46,600 AUDIENCE OOHS 526 00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:50,960 What's happened, Alex? Let me have a look. 527 00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:53,160 I don't want you to have a look, you broke it. 528 00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:54,640 But the time's going! I know. 529 00:26:54,680 --> 00:26:56,120 Here we go, all right. 530 00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:58,560 OK, come back round, Alex. I don't like running. 531 00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:02,320 Alex, you all right? 532 00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:06,320 BELL RINGS 533 00:27:14,320 --> 00:27:16,960 HORN HONKS Alex! 534 00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:28,240 Stop, stop. Stop. 535 00:27:28,280 --> 00:27:30,360 Hold on a minute, Alex. 536 00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:32,480 Judi... Judi... 537 00:27:32,520 --> 00:27:34,960 Come on, quickly, we've got 35 seconds. 538 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:38,520 Alex, get down. 539 00:27:41,160 --> 00:27:42,720 Ooh! 540 00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:46,520 WHISTLE BLOWS 541 00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:48,240 Well, thank you, Judi. 542 00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:50,960 Is your bike all right now? Yeah, it's good, it's fine. 543 00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:53,120 And this chain's perfect. OK. 544 00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:55,360 Yeah. Thanks, Judi. HORN HONKS 545 00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:57,440 Thank you. Bye-bye. Bye. 546 00:27:57,480 --> 00:27:59,320 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 547 00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:04,640 Well, it wasn't a huge surprise to me that you, er, 548 00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:07,040 physically intimidated him. 549 00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:08,320 Felt quite sorry for you. 550 00:28:08,360 --> 00:28:10,160 Thank you, thank you. I was quite desperate. 551 00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:12,400 I didn't notice you handling more than one duck at a time 552 00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:14,560 till afterwards, cos I was so upset about the bike. 553 00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:17,520 I never had more than one duck at a time. 554 00:28:17,560 --> 00:28:19,600 No, what you need to understand - 555 00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:22,480 the ducks felt some motherly instincts from me. 556 00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:24,320 LAUGHTER 557 00:28:24,360 --> 00:28:26,440 They wanted to be nursed in these breasts. 558 00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:31,000 How am I supposed to say "no" to the little ducklings, huh? 559 00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:32,600 How am I supposed to do that? 560 00:28:32,640 --> 00:28:36,000 ♪ La-la-la-la-la... 561 00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:38,840 She broke the rules, yeah? Yes, absolutely. Yeah, yeah. 562 00:28:38,880 --> 00:28:39,880 ♪ La-la-la... ♪ 563 00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:43,520 She broke the rules and the bike - so unfortunately, Judi... 564 00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:46,120 Judi did get 90 ducks in my basket. 565 00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:49,240 I saved 90 ducks' life! 566 00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:51,120 They weren't in danger! 567 00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:55,880 They were - listen, they were in... They're plastic, Judi! 568 00:28:55,920 --> 00:28:59,480 Yes, so the numbers were that Bridget got all 148 of the ducks 569 00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:00,960 into the basket. Yeah. 570 00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:04,720 Chris actually got more than Sophie, despite Sophie's system, four more. 571 00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:07,440 Chris 65, Sophie 61, Ardal 48. 572 00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:09,760 So, those are sort of the numbers. Yeah. Yeah. 573 00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:11,960 Although, before you score it, 574 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:14,840 I do have to show you one more video. 575 00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:17,600 Remember how well Bridget Christie did? 576 00:29:17,640 --> 00:29:19,720 She did also do this. 577 00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:22,720 "You can only hold one at a time." 578 00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:24,960 No, surely not. 579 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:29,920 "You may only hold one duck at a time." 580 00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:31,320 "One duck, one duck at a..." 581 00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:33,800 "Only hold one duck at a time." 582 00:29:33,840 --> 00:29:37,160 That can't be right. 583 00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:38,960 "One at a time" - that can't be right. 584 00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,880 One in each hand? No, one at a time. 585 00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:43,360 Is it really only one at a time? That can't be right. 586 00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:45,400 Can't be right, no, surely not. 587 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:46,920 Right, I've done one at a time. 588 00:29:46,960 --> 00:29:49,240 ECHOING: One at a time... 589 00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:51,080 ..one at a time. One duck. 590 00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:54,360 There you go. I'm so sorry. 591 00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:57,200 APPLAUSE 592 00:29:57,240 --> 00:29:59,040 I don't take any pleasure in that at all. 593 00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:00,640 It's totally fair. 594 00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:03,280 AUDIENCE AWWS 595 00:30:03,320 --> 00:30:06,160 Well, that's no fun. LAUGHTER 596 00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:08,640 What a heartbreaking end. 597 00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:10,200 Let's award the points. 598 00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:13,200 Yes, well, it's Ardal, 3 points, Sophie, 4 points, 599 00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:15,720 but Chris gets the full 5 points! There it is. 600 00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:18,120 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 601 00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:19,600 Is it time for the final task? 602 00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:23,280 It is - and also, it's time for the final team task of the series. 603 00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:26,440 So, for the last time, let's see the Fab Five face the music. 604 00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:27,560 GREG WHISTLES 605 00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:40,320 Hello, Ardal. Hi. 606 00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:41,720 Oh, thank you. 607 00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:43,640 Hello, Chris. Hello! 608 00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:47,200 You started, have you, Bridget? 609 00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:48,840 LAUGHTER 610 00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:53,880 BRIDGET: Sorry, has our time started yet? 611 00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:56,320 Maybe it has. It maybe has. 612 00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:58,440 OK. 613 00:30:58,480 --> 00:30:59,920 Do you have a hairy chest? 614 00:30:59,960 --> 00:31:00,960 Yeah...well, yes. 615 00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:03,000 I think you look quite dapper. 616 00:31:03,040 --> 00:31:04,760 Yeah. Oh, OK. 617 00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:10,640 Oh, so that's now. 618 00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:13,400 Yes, I wish I did. Can you open the task, please? 619 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:18,640 "Record the best multi-track song about your team." 620 00:31:18,680 --> 00:31:20,000 Oh, godammit. 621 00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:22,800 "You must record all six tracks with your voice or body." 622 00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:25,960 "And each person must record the same number of tracks." 623 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:30,360 "Most powerful multi-track song wins." 624 00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:31,920 "You have 20 minutes." 625 00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:36,560 Worth reading the last line, I think, in full. 626 00:31:36,600 --> 00:31:39,560 Erm, do you think? Should we read the last line? 627 00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:41,360 "Your time starts now." 628 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:43,640 Great. So, one of us could beatbox. 629 00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:45,040 I mean, I could whistle. 630 00:31:45,080 --> 00:31:47,400 Can anyone sing? No. 631 00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:53,800 Well, I have been told a few times that, you know, my voice... 632 00:31:53,840 --> 00:31:55,280 OK, you're going to sing. OK! 633 00:31:55,320 --> 00:31:57,960 Track one, beat. Yeah. Track two, cymbal. OK. 634 00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:01,280 Track three, some kind of rattling noise. Yes, yes. 635 00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:03,240 Track four, vocals. Vocals, yes. 636 00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:04,840 Track five, vocals. OK. 637 00:32:04,880 --> 00:32:07,400 Track six, er, a humming, or some shit. 638 00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:09,360 Yes, yes, I like that. OK. 639 00:32:09,400 --> 00:32:10,880 THEY HUM 640 00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:14,280 SOPHIE VOCALISES 641 00:32:14,320 --> 00:32:16,120 BRIDGET WHISTLES 642 00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:17,480 That's one song right there. 643 00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:19,800 That'll do, that will... We'll do that, then. 644 00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:23,920 ARDAL: I mean, obviously, we're hugely inspired by Taskmaster. 645 00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:26,920 Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Always keep that in mind, OK? 646 00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:28,960 I do like the sycophantic angle, I really do. 647 00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:31,400 Yeah, but we can't make it too unsubtle, you know what I mean? 648 00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:32,960 Right, OK. You've got to let him know. 649 00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:35,200 Well, we could say we do it sort of for you. 650 00:32:35,240 --> 00:32:37,320 Do it with you in mind. With you mind. 651 00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:42,160 Let's just freestyle. We're like the freestyle house queens. 652 00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:45,040 That's quite good. House Queens. House Queens. That's good. 653 00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:47,840 ARDAL: Something about how unbreakable we are as a team. 654 00:32:47,880 --> 00:32:50,160 What's an unbreakable thing, like what...? 655 00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:52,760 Diamond. Diamond, yeah. 656 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:55,320 We're actually called The Water Diamonds. 657 00:32:55,360 --> 00:32:58,360 Er, so "by The Water Diamonds". 658 00:32:58,400 --> 00:33:00,400 The Water Diamonds are a band from Fleetwood. 659 00:33:00,440 --> 00:33:02,440 You're joking. No. They're already a band. 660 00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:04,840 The Tungsten Diamonds? Just checking it now. 661 00:33:04,880 --> 00:33:07,920 Why have we wasted at least five minutes coming up with a band name, 662 00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:10,080 when that is not really the most important thing of 663 00:33:10,120 --> 00:33:11,600 this whole godforsaken task? 664 00:33:13,960 --> 00:33:16,760 APPLAUSE 665 00:33:17,840 --> 00:33:20,560 Well, straight away, I think The House Queens seem to be 666 00:33:20,600 --> 00:33:22,280 driven by a baseless confidence. 667 00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:25,320 They were full of confidence. 668 00:33:25,360 --> 00:33:28,880 Bridget went her own way - sure, whistling like my grandfather. 669 00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:32,680 Er, perhaps less confident in the boys. 670 00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:36,520 You sort of had the energy of, sort of, two low-level bank clerks 671 00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:38,920 at a training day. 672 00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:42,040 And they've come up with an uplifting anthem to show you 673 00:33:42,080 --> 00:33:44,280 their love for you - but not too obviously. 674 00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:48,000 Oh, good. I wouldn't want you to show it too obviously. 675 00:33:48,040 --> 00:33:49,240 Here we go. 676 00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:52,840 It's a really old boyband called The Tungsten Diamonds. 677 00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:55,120 CHRIS BEATBOXES 678 00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:58,840 ♪ Chris, Chris, Chris, oh, Chris, Chris 679 00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:01,280 ♪ Ardal and Chris, Chris and Ardal 680 00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:02,960 ♪ Chris, Chris, Chris, Chris 681 00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:04,880 ARDAL SCATS 682 00:34:04,920 --> 00:34:07,760 ARDAL VOCALISES 683 00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:10,280 ♪ Blood is thicker than water # Taskmaster 684 00:34:10,320 --> 00:34:14,080 ♪ That's what they say, that's what they say 685 00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:19,560 ♪ But our team juice is even thicker than blood 686 00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:22,640 ♪ Er, yeah 687 00:34:22,680 --> 00:34:26,400 ♪ We care, we really, really care 688 00:34:26,440 --> 00:34:28,880 ♪ In a high five stand-off, we'll take your fucking hand off 689 00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:31,120 ♪ Score a hat trick with a yoga ball, stag do banter 690 00:34:31,160 --> 00:34:33,920 ♪ We know it all, cooler than ice sliding down a pole 691 00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:37,160 ♪ And if you want to aubergine shifted, give us a call 692 00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:41,440 ♪ You put an aubergine in my mouth # Ardal and Chris, Chris and Ardal 693 00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:44,240 ♪ You put an aubergine in my mouth 694 00:34:44,280 --> 00:34:49,200 ♪ But you care, and we want to please Mr T 695 00:34:49,240 --> 00:34:51,800 ♪ We love you, Mr T 696 00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:57,360 ♪ Everything we do, we do it with you in mind, Mr T 697 00:34:57,400 --> 00:35:01,080 ♪ You inspire me...and Chris. 698 00:35:01,120 --> 00:35:02,600 ♪ Chris, Chris, Chris 699 00:35:02,640 --> 00:35:05,080 ♪ You put an aubergine in my mouth 700 00:35:05,120 --> 00:35:08,240 CHRIS VOCALISES 701 00:35:08,280 --> 00:35:10,400 ♪ Chris, Chris, Chris, Chris. 702 00:35:10,440 --> 00:35:12,800 ♪ I love you, Chris 703 00:35:12,840 --> 00:35:15,120 "CHRIS" ECHOES 704 00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:16,680 ♪ Ardal and Chris... ♪ 705 00:35:18,120 --> 00:35:22,600 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 706 00:35:27,440 --> 00:35:29,920 I literally don't know what's going on. 707 00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:33,040 I-I don't know what I've just heard. 708 00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:37,320 Annoyingly, the couple of tasks that I rapped about haven't been shown 709 00:35:37,360 --> 00:35:40,040 in the series, so that's... including the aubergine one. Yeah. 710 00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:41,360 So, that's just gobblegook. 711 00:35:41,400 --> 00:35:44,160 Well, that's good to know, cos I literally thought you'd gone mad. 712 00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:47,040 I don't know what he's talking, about this aubergine t... 713 00:35:47,080 --> 00:35:48,960 The women didn't have to do an aubergine task. 714 00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:50,560 I think he's making that up. OK. 715 00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:52,160 I put an aubergine in his mouth! 716 00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:55,080 I don't think we'd make you do that. Yeah! I can't... 717 00:35:55,120 --> 00:35:56,880 You've got to believe us! 718 00:35:56,920 --> 00:35:58,520 It doesn't sound like this show. 719 00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:00,440 LAUGHTER 720 00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:04,160 Right, we've just got one itty bitty part left to go. 721 00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:07,160 I'm going to miss these guys. I don't always say that. 722 00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:09,360 But that doesn't make it any less scripted. 723 00:36:09,400 --> 00:36:10,760 LAUGHTER 724 00:36:17,720 --> 00:36:19,400 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 725 00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:22,600 Welcome back my dear, dear friends. 726 00:36:22,640 --> 00:36:24,520 It's the final part of our grand final. 727 00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:26,400 Isn't that exciting, Alex? 728 00:36:27,480 --> 00:36:28,920 LAUGHTER 729 00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:33,200 I'm s... I'm so sorry Greg. 730 00:36:33,240 --> 00:36:36,160 QUIETLY: It's OK. We all need to unwind sometimes. 731 00:36:36,200 --> 00:36:38,400 Well, I know, but I should've been concentrating. 732 00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:40,720 Hey, I've got you a ticket for the party later. 733 00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:42,040 JUDI GASPS 734 00:36:42,080 --> 00:36:43,360 AUDIENCE AWWS 735 00:36:43,400 --> 00:36:45,040 Thank you so much. 736 00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:47,040 It's all good, where were we? 737 00:36:47,080 --> 00:36:51,400 Well, the teams are trying to make the most powerful multitrack song. 738 00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:53,360 We've seen the boys make beautiful music - 739 00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:56,960 now finally, here's Bridget, Judi, and Sophie's composition. 740 00:36:58,040 --> 00:37:00,960 ♪ Welcome to House Queens 741 00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:04,240 JUDI BEATBOXES 742 00:37:04,280 --> 00:37:05,840 BRIDGET WHISTLES 743 00:37:05,880 --> 00:37:07,920 SOPHIE VOCALISES 744 00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:10,720 ♪ Goodnight, your majesties. 745 00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:13,080 SOPHIES VOCALISES 746 00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:15,520 BRIDGET WHISTLES 747 00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:18,200 ♪ Come on now, come give me a twirl 748 00:37:18,240 --> 00:37:20,280 ♪ We're going to let all our rhymes unfurl 749 00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:22,560 ♪ To the boys and girls all around the world 750 00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:26,240 ♪ Cos you got to listen to the House Queens 751 00:37:26,280 --> 00:37:28,520 ♪ One team, one dream 752 00:37:28,560 --> 00:37:31,120 ♪ We all scream for the House Queens 753 00:37:31,160 --> 00:37:33,520 ♪ One team, one dream 754 00:37:33,560 --> 00:37:36,120 ♪ We all scream for the House Queens 755 00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:38,480 ♪ One team, one dream 756 00:37:38,520 --> 00:37:41,160 ♪ We all scream for the House Queens 757 00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:43,320 ♪ One team, one dream 758 00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:45,560 ♪ We all scream 759 00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:49,000 ♪ For the House Queens 760 00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:50,600 SOPHIE VOCALISES 761 00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:53,000 ♪ Taskmaster thinks faster 762 00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:55,360 ♪ We're going to cook you some pasta. 763 00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:58,040 ♪ We're going to take you into the other room and beat you 764 00:37:58,080 --> 00:37:59,840 ♪ Until you need a "plasta" 765 00:37:59,880 --> 00:38:01,920 ♪ Oh, Greg, what you doing? 766 00:38:01,960 --> 00:38:04,040 ♪ Why you sitting there on that throne? 767 00:38:04,080 --> 00:38:06,960 ♪ Cos when the House Queens come into the Taskmaster house 768 00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:09,360 ♪ You're going to be left all alone 769 00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:11,320 ♪ One team, one dream 770 00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:14,240 ♪ We all scream for the House Queens 771 00:38:14,280 --> 00:38:16,320 ♪ One team, one dream, 772 00:38:16,360 --> 00:38:21,360 ♪ We all scream for the House Queens 773 00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:24,120 ♪ Enter the House Queens... ♪ 774 00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:29,240 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 775 00:38:33,720 --> 00:38:38,360 Oh, my God. I mean, mm-hmm... 776 00:38:38,400 --> 00:38:41,680 I feel foolish for doubting that that whistle would fit in. 777 00:38:42,920 --> 00:38:46,480 Like a glove! Absolutely slid in. 778 00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:50,080 In the song, I appear to be being fed pasta before you beat me 779 00:38:50,120 --> 00:38:52,280 and "give me a plaster". 780 00:38:52,320 --> 00:38:56,120 Yeah. That's how you show love. With carbs, pasta. 781 00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:58,640 Was there any, any aubergine in this pasta? 782 00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:00,800 No, but there's rice at home, Chris. 783 00:39:02,360 --> 00:39:04,760 JUDI: I never doubted the House Queens. 784 00:39:04,800 --> 00:39:06,880 ARDAL: The House Queens and Bez. 785 00:39:06,920 --> 00:39:09,560 LAUGHTER 786 00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:12,640 BRIDGET: You know, it's... 787 00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:14,040 I've got to defend Bridget, 788 00:39:14,080 --> 00:39:16,560 because Bez never whistled on any of those tracks. 789 00:39:16,600 --> 00:39:19,520 Thank you! She also provided all the percussion, the stomping. 790 00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:21,520 Yeah, the stamping, which was crucial. 791 00:39:21,560 --> 00:39:23,040 That was quite hard to do, actually. 792 00:39:23,080 --> 00:39:25,600 Yeah, the dance style. Oh, yeah. It was unique. 793 00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:28,080 Well, I... 794 00:39:28,120 --> 00:39:30,080 It was more flamboyant than that, Greg. 795 00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:31,880 Do you want to see the dancing again? 796 00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:34,320 I'd love to see the dancing again. Oh, don't. 797 00:39:34,360 --> 00:39:37,320 LAUGHTER 798 00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:41,640 It actually brought me to mind of something that happened 799 00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:42,840 earlier on in the series. 800 00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:45,480 Do you remember a bit when Bridget was walking, and it was funny? 801 00:39:45,520 --> 00:39:48,760 I remember several bits when I've enjoyed Bridget's walk. 802 00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:51,920 Well, it turns out she dances exactly the same way as she walks. 803 00:39:51,960 --> 00:39:54,640 LAUGHTER 804 00:40:12,240 --> 00:40:14,400 JUDI: Can we not just talk about my singing? 805 00:40:16,680 --> 00:40:18,120 The singing was nice. 806 00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:20,160 I mean, they are both cracking tracks, 807 00:40:20,200 --> 00:40:21,680 let me acknowledge that first. 808 00:40:21,720 --> 00:40:24,480 I don't think there would be many people who'd question 809 00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:27,880 the superiority of "One Team, One Dream" for The House Queens. 810 00:40:27,920 --> 00:40:30,240 Going to give the girls 5 points each. Mm-hm. 811 00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:33,400 But I'm going to give the boys a sweet 3 points each. 812 00:40:33,440 --> 00:40:35,600 So, 3 to the boys, 5 to the girls! There it is! 813 00:40:35,640 --> 00:40:38,320 CHEERING 814 00:40:38,360 --> 00:40:39,920 All right, here we go. 815 00:40:39,960 --> 00:40:43,200 Please make your way to the stage for the final task of the series! 816 00:40:46,240 --> 00:40:49,000 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 817 00:40:52,520 --> 00:40:54,840 Hello. Rahh! Still really pumped. 818 00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:57,760 Ohh. Rahh! 819 00:40:57,800 --> 00:41:00,560 Erm, who's going to read out the final task, you silly boy? 820 00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:02,880 I would like Judi Love to read the last one out. 821 00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:04,720 Ahem. 822 00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:07,240 "Draw a life-size self portrait. 823 00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:11,880 "Your nose must be poking through your nose hole at all times. 824 00:41:11,920 --> 00:41:14,840 "Most accurate self portrait wins. 825 00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:17,600 "You have 200 seconds." 826 00:41:17,640 --> 00:41:19,880 So, you're going to be stepping behind your canvases, 827 00:41:19,920 --> 00:41:21,760 poking your nose through the triangle. 828 00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:23,800 So, you won't be able to see what you're doing, 829 00:41:23,840 --> 00:41:25,280 or what you're doing it with. 830 00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:27,480 Place them behind the canvases! 831 00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:29,000 All right. There you go. 832 00:41:29,040 --> 00:41:32,760 We do need noses protruding at all times, Greg. 833 00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:35,040 200 seconds, good luck. 834 00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:36,240 WHISTLE BLOWS 835 00:41:36,280 --> 00:41:38,440 And they're off, Greg. 836 00:41:38,480 --> 00:41:39,720 Ah, yes. 837 00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:44,920 I mean, I've got an instant favourite, Greg. 838 00:41:44,960 --> 00:41:47,600 LAUGHTER 839 00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:50,240 Features, features, accuracy. 840 00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:53,680 There are some good ones. 841 00:41:53,720 --> 00:41:55,440 There are SOME good ones. 842 00:41:58,760 --> 00:42:02,640 Ah. LAUGHTER 843 00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:05,480 Remember the features that you have. 844 00:42:05,520 --> 00:42:07,760 And remember the features that ALL humans have. 845 00:42:07,800 --> 00:42:10,040 All human beings have. 846 00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:13,160 Erm, I would say - unless you have a rectangular head, 847 00:42:13,200 --> 00:42:14,680 worth doing an outline. 848 00:42:14,720 --> 00:42:16,440 LAUGHTER 849 00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:19,840 Think about the things you need to be able to see and hear. 850 00:42:21,400 --> 00:42:24,840 OK, you have just five seconds left. 851 00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:27,360 If you look like a giant frog, that's great. 852 00:42:27,400 --> 00:42:29,800 LAUGHTER 853 00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:32,240 WHISTLE BLOWS OK, please, stop drawing. 854 00:42:32,280 --> 00:42:34,680 OK, at this point, I'll ask you to step back on your circles. 855 00:42:34,720 --> 00:42:36,400 Please don't look at your canvases. 856 00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:38,280 Greg, you'll judge, but first of all, 857 00:42:38,320 --> 00:42:40,160 I'll ask Ardal to step forward. 858 00:42:40,200 --> 00:42:42,320 LAUGHTER 859 00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:44,720 Is it like looking in the mirror, Ardal? 860 00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:46,600 Similar, yeah. 861 00:42:46,640 --> 00:42:50,000 Just lovely. Bridget, would you like to step forward and have a look 862 00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:51,600 at your picture? 863 00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:53,840 It's not bad. It isn't bad. 864 00:42:53,880 --> 00:42:57,680 I think I'd get a better idea if Bridget was dancing. 865 00:42:57,720 --> 00:42:59,960 LAUGHTER 866 00:43:00,000 --> 00:43:02,480 APPLAUSE Pretty good. 867 00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:04,800 All right, Chris, would you like to step forward and 868 00:43:04,840 --> 00:43:07,200 have a look at yours? It's not bad at all. 869 00:43:07,240 --> 00:43:10,320 It's better than I draw when I'm looking at the canvas. 870 00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:12,600 Are you ready to see yourself, Judi? 871 00:43:12,640 --> 00:43:14,040 Yes. 872 00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:16,040 LAUGHTER 873 00:43:16,080 --> 00:43:18,040 It's absolutely incredible, isn't it? 874 00:43:18,080 --> 00:43:22,320 Look at the eyes and the eyelashes, and look at the eye shadow. 875 00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:25,040 If only you could've remembered the eyes themselves. 876 00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:27,000 LAUGHTER 877 00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:33,400 One left to see - Sophie, do you want to step forward 878 00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:36,000 and have a look at yours? Got ears, I've got the hair. 879 00:43:36,040 --> 00:43:39,120 Got the floating eye. The flowers. No, these are the two eyes. 880 00:43:39,160 --> 00:43:42,040 Yeah, I know that - just one eye isn't on your fucking head. 881 00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:44,960 LAUGHTER 882 00:43:46,320 --> 00:43:47,800 Greg, you've got to judge these. 883 00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:49,400 Do you want me to go from the top? 884 00:43:49,440 --> 00:43:51,480 Let's go from the bottom. 885 00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:52,960 Why are you looking at Ardal? 886 00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:59,320 If the eyes weren't directly on top of the head, 887 00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:02,760 and you got any features right, 888 00:44:02,800 --> 00:44:04,640 I wouldn't be giving you 1 point. 889 00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:08,800 Judi, yours is quite rubbish. 2 points. 890 00:44:10,480 --> 00:44:14,560 I like Sophie's because I think it captures something of the woman - 891 00:44:14,600 --> 00:44:16,680 but I don't like it as much as the other two. 892 00:44:16,720 --> 00:44:18,560 OK, so 3 points to Sophie Duker? 893 00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:21,080 No, I'm going to give 4 points to Sophie Duker, 894 00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:24,080 and I'm going to give 5 points to the other two, cos I think 895 00:44:24,120 --> 00:44:25,880 they really do capture each other. 896 00:44:25,920 --> 00:44:28,600 But there's something of the energy of that that I like. 897 00:44:28,640 --> 00:44:31,120 There we go. So, Bridget and Chris get the 5 points! 898 00:44:31,160 --> 00:44:34,760 Please come down, let's see how that's affected the final scores! 899 00:44:34,800 --> 00:44:35,960 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 900 00:44:37,760 --> 00:44:39,160 Come my friends. 901 00:44:43,840 --> 00:44:45,760 Oh, yeah. What a competition. 902 00:44:45,800 --> 00:44:47,880 Rahh! Rawr! 903 00:44:47,920 --> 00:44:50,000 Yes, so you gave out the scores, Greg. Yes. 904 00:44:50,040 --> 00:44:53,000 And Judi, as we know, has not won an episode. 905 00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:55,000 And you're building up to say that she's... 906 00:44:55,040 --> 00:44:57,520 Well, last again, yes, so Judi... LAUGHTER 907 00:44:57,560 --> 00:45:00,320 ..at one end of the leaderboard, it's Judi with 13. 908 00:45:00,360 --> 00:45:02,960 At the other, 22 points go to Sophie Duker! 909 00:45:03,000 --> 00:45:07,840 CHEERING Whoa! Sophie wins the episode! 910 00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:11,400 You're the conflicted winner of other people's precious heirlooms. 911 00:45:11,440 --> 00:45:13,640 Please go and collect your things! 912 00:45:13,680 --> 00:45:16,400 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 913 00:45:20,120 --> 00:45:21,400 LAUGHTER 914 00:45:26,040 --> 00:45:29,520 You join us for the presentation of our hallowed trophy. 915 00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:32,640 In just a few moments, a life will change forever. 916 00:45:32,680 --> 00:45:33,960 So, here we go. 917 00:45:34,000 --> 00:45:36,280 The suspense is immeasurable. 918 00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:42,520 Please, little Alex Horne... what are the final scores? 919 00:45:42,560 --> 00:45:45,040 Well, in fifth place - 920 00:45:45,080 --> 00:45:50,200 but I do need to make it clear she is the highest-scoring... 921 00:45:50,240 --> 00:45:54,320 ..loser we've ever had, with 142 points, 922 00:45:54,360 --> 00:45:55,840 it's Judi Love! 923 00:45:55,880 --> 00:45:58,840 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 924 00:45:58,880 --> 00:46:03,320 On 153 points and wearing a wonderful leather jacket, 925 00:46:03,360 --> 00:46:04,720 it's Ardal O'Hanlon! 926 00:46:04,760 --> 00:46:07,520 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 927 00:46:07,560 --> 00:46:11,200 In third place with 157 points, it's the wonderful 928 00:46:11,240 --> 00:46:12,880 Bridget Christie! Bridget. 929 00:46:12,920 --> 00:46:15,200 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 930 00:46:15,240 --> 00:46:18,320 And then, they've been trading places throughout the series. 931 00:46:18,360 --> 00:46:23,320 But with 170 points in second place, 932 00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:27,120 we have Chris Ramsey. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 933 00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:30,080 Wow. He was right up there throughout. 934 00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:33,840 And just three points behind, this series' winner, 935 00:46:33,880 --> 00:46:36,480 who had 173 points. 936 00:46:36,520 --> 00:46:40,080 Our brand-new Taskmaster champion... 937 00:46:40,120 --> 00:46:41,560 ..is Sophie Duker! 938 00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:44,080 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 939 00:46:47,840 --> 00:46:50,280 Please take it. 940 00:46:50,320 --> 00:46:51,760 Whoo! 941 00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:54,560 CHEERING CONTINUES 942 00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:56,560 We'll see you next time! 943 00:47:20,480 --> 00:47:24,000 Subtitles by Red Bee Media