1 00:00:02,840 --> 00:00:04,400 Whaa? 2 00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:14,120 Ah! 3 00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:16,720 Oh! Oh! 4 00:00:16,760 --> 00:00:18,080 Shut up! 5 00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:21,480 Argh! 6 00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:24,240 Argh! 7 00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:38,640 Hello, thank you. 8 00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:40,840 I'm Greg Davies and I'm a very nice man. 9 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:42,520 You'll often find me whistling 10 00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:45,440 and skipping down the street, tra la la la la la! 11 00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:48,040 I may stop, scoop up some abandoned dog mess, 12 00:00:48,080 --> 00:00:50,080 lead a senior citizen across the road. 13 00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:53,200 I may restrain an errant youth and correct his behaviour. 14 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:56,440 But even nice people need a release sometimes, 15 00:00:56,480 --> 00:00:58,520 somewhere to let out supressed anger, 16 00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:01,600 a howl in the night, a place where darkness can run amok. 17 00:01:01,640 --> 00:01:03,520 Welcome to Taskmaster! 18 00:01:03,560 --> 00:01:06,360 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 19 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:10,160 And the very best of luck to... Dara O Briain. 20 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:12,000 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 21 00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:14,680 Fern Brady. 22 00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:16,800 John Kearns. 23 00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:19,200 Munya Chawawa. 24 00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:22,000 And Sarah Millican. 25 00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:26,560 And to my left, a man who told me in confidence he's scared 26 00:01:26,600 --> 00:01:28,560 of three things - slugs, 27 00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:32,280 small spaces and women being allowed to vote. 28 00:01:32,320 --> 00:01:34,800 LAUGHTER 29 00:01:36,360 --> 00:01:38,520 Little Alex Horne! 30 00:01:38,560 --> 00:01:41,120 APPLAUSE 31 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,720 Prize task time. Yes, it is 32 00:01:45,760 --> 00:01:47,960 and it's something we all think about once a week 33 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:50,440 because you've asked them this week to bring in 34 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:53,840 the thing that you most want on a Sunday morning. 35 00:01:53,880 --> 00:01:55,480 Ooh. Yes, 36 00:01:55,520 --> 00:01:59,800 I didn't have to think too long about this one. You know... 37 00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:02,280 So Greg will give a big five to his fave 38 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:04,600 and then at the end of the show the person with the most points 39 00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:07,280 will take home all the ingredients for a perfect Sunday morning. OK? 40 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:08,960 Yes. Good. Hello, Sarah. 41 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:12,120 What's your perfect thing for a Sunday morning? 42 00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:14,080 Well, I stay in hotels a lot on tour 43 00:02:14,120 --> 00:02:17,480 and people in hotels think you should be up at eight o'clock - 44 00:02:17,520 --> 00:02:19,200 cos they're dicks. 45 00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:23,880 And I always have a "do not disturb" sign on my door in a hotel. 46 00:02:23,920 --> 00:02:27,320 I never want my room cleaned cos I'm quite a dirty person. 47 00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:30,960 So I've brought my own "do not disturb" sign. 48 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:34,680 There it is. That's the first prize on offer. 49 00:02:34,720 --> 00:02:37,000 I think there's nothing more aggressive than 50 00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:39,960 a do not disturb sign that doesn't match everybody else's 51 00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:41,280 do not disturb sign. Wow. 52 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:43,600 Hmm. I can't tell if the bar is high or low. 53 00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:46,520 Well, the rage is what I enjoyed. 54 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:47,880 Oh, you always do, yeah. 55 00:02:47,920 --> 00:02:49,720 Well, we're moving onto John now who's come last in 56 00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:51,360 the last two ones of these. Hello, John. 57 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:53,040 The very best of luck to you. 58 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:55,000 Thank you. It's a business card. 59 00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:56,160 Oh... 60 00:02:56,200 --> 00:02:58,520 LAUGHTER 61 00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:01,000 Oh, and Fern's next, is she? 62 00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,800 Do you want to see? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 63 00:03:04,840 --> 00:03:07,040 It says "Know what you want 64 00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:09,840 and have the confidence to go after it." Yeah. 65 00:03:09,880 --> 00:03:13,160 LAUGHTER 66 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:16,840 Look if you're walking down the street 67 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:19,720 and someone gave you that... Yeah. That, you know... 68 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:21,440 Hello, yes, bang. 69 00:03:21,480 --> 00:03:23,800 Know what you want and have the confidence to go after it. 70 00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:27,480 A, you're keeping that for the rest of your life 71 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:30,640 and it's also, it's all you're thinking about all day. 72 00:03:30,680 --> 00:03:32,560 I would like it, I think, if someone gave me that. 73 00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,280 Yeah, look, everyone reading that 74 00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:36,280 know what you want, so that's tricky, but... 75 00:03:36,320 --> 00:03:38,560 Yeah, and then have the confidence to go after it. 76 00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:40,840 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we've read it. 77 00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:43,160 Um, Fern what have you brought in? 78 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,560 It's my favourite breakfast soup. 79 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:48,600 This is her favourite breakfast soup. Lovely. 80 00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:53,760 It's like a savoury tofu pudding, that people have in China. 81 00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:56,000 I think Alex has some. 82 00:03:56,040 --> 00:03:59,240 Here you are. There's the slop. Yes. Try it. 83 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:00,560 Try it? 84 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:01,880 IN MANDARIN: Please eat. 85 00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:03,120 Well, obviously. 86 00:04:04,920 --> 00:04:05,920 Oh. 87 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:10,640 Fishy. It's very spicy and quite crunchy. Can I try some? 88 00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:12,280 Yes, please do. Oh, my God. 89 00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:14,880 Greg, I thought you weren't going to try it, cos aren't you from 90 00:04:14,920 --> 00:04:16,320 Shrewsbury or something? 91 00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:18,680 LAUGHTER 92 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:23,280 You seem like you just eat roasts. 93 00:04:23,320 --> 00:04:26,360 LAUGHTER 94 00:04:28,840 --> 00:04:31,400 Oh, God, yeah. That is... 95 00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:33,880 It is, isn't it? Tastes like a farmyard. 96 00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:38,080 Well, you'd like that, cos of where you're from. 97 00:04:38,120 --> 00:04:40,520 It's the flavour of hopelessness. 98 00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:41,840 Um, Munya. 99 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:47,480 Hello. I have brought in the Super Grater 3000. 100 00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:49,440 Yes, here it is. The Super Grater. 101 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:50,560 Oh, my God! 102 00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:53,240 He's grabbed a grater on his way out the house. 103 00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:54,840 It's not, it's not a grater. 104 00:04:54,880 --> 00:04:58,440 This thing here is essentially a cheese grater of the foot. 105 00:04:58,480 --> 00:05:00,040 Ugh! 106 00:05:00,080 --> 00:05:01,960 It can be used on wet and dry feet. 107 00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:05,880 I mean, it's one of the bleakest images... 108 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:07,920 It's the bleakest image 109 00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:10,640 I've had since I imaged sharing breakfast with Fern. 110 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:13,720 All right, Dara. 111 00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:17,040 This should be a piece of piss, I imagine? 112 00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:20,560 I brought in a massive segmented frying pan. And here it is. 113 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:22,000 I find, look, that's supposed 114 00:05:22,040 --> 00:05:23,960 to be doing, you know, rashers in one place, 115 00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:25,640 eggs in another, beans in another. 116 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:26,720 I'm sorry, Dara, 117 00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:29,520 are you under the impression I haven't got one of these? 118 00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:31,400 I've got one. 119 00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:34,760 I find, often even on something like a lighter breakfast, I like 120 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:36,400 a little bit of fresh food. 121 00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:39,640 Got some pineapples, cereal, er... 122 00:05:39,680 --> 00:05:42,640 I'm aware as well that any time you do anything on television 123 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:44,400 that looks like you've wasted food, 124 00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:46,800 people get very angry about that, like it should be noted that 125 00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:49,480 the pineapple and the yoghurt go back in the fridge. 126 00:05:49,520 --> 00:05:51,640 The bagel went back in the bread basket. 127 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:53,840 The kids ate the Cheerios 128 00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:56,480 and then, to get rid of the orange juice, I got a straw 129 00:05:56,520 --> 00:05:58,560 so that we weren't wasting any food at any stage. 130 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,280 Oh, it was you that sucked it up? 131 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:01,800 It wasn't that old man? 132 00:06:01,840 --> 00:06:05,240 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 133 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,080 Um, all right, then. Ready? 134 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,200 Uh, yes, right. Where we starting? One? 135 00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:16,080 You know where were starting. We're starting with old smooth feet. 136 00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:17,320 Ooh. 137 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:18,600 Who's that? 138 00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:20,080 Is that his actual nickname? 139 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:24,000 LAUGHTER 140 00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:28,480 I...I'm giving–poor old Munya one point. 141 00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:30,080 OK. Munya, one point, well done. 142 00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:32,320 Sarah's rage delighted me. 143 00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:35,480 Oh, God, it's between Sarah and the Chinese soup. 144 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:40,240 For the sake of hotel staff, I'm going to give her two points. 145 00:06:40,280 --> 00:06:41,920 OK, two to Sarah. 146 00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:44,640 Yeah, unbelievably, that soup gets three points. 147 00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:45,680 I mean... 148 00:06:46,760 --> 00:06:49,800 Now, this is where things get controversial. 149 00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:52,720 The truth is, if someone gave me that business card in 150 00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:56,240 the street I honestly think it would make my day. What? 151 00:06:56,280 --> 00:06:58,320 So, against all odds 152 00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:01,040 and it just shows you how deeply unfair this show is... 153 00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:03,160 LAUGHTER 154 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:06,480 ..I'm giving John Kearns five points and I'll stand by it. 155 00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:08,440 Right, so it's four points to Dara O Briain 156 00:07:08,480 --> 00:07:10,240 but five huh, to John Kearns. There it is! 157 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:13,280 CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 158 00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:15,240 Thank you. 159 00:07:15,280 --> 00:07:16,680 Very good. All right, 160 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:18,960 my furry chum, what's next on the agenda? 161 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:22,560 Well, it's a gritty team task, Greg. 162 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:39,120 Hello, Sarah. Hi, Alex. Hello, Munya. Hi, Alex. 163 00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:40,480 Hello, Fern. Hiya. 164 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:45,320 Fern, wait for your team. 165 00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:47,880 Oh, sorry! Did I shut the door on them? 166 00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:50,800 Yeah. I'm not really a team player. 167 00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:52,240 Secure the perimeter. 168 00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:55,840 Place half your hands on half your hips... 169 00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:57,280 ..and leave them there until 170 00:07:57,320 --> 00:07:59,640 the second part of the task is over. Also... 171 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:03,520 ..the hands that are on hips must only touch those hips... 172 00:08:03,560 --> 00:08:06,280 ..until the second part of the task is over. 173 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,160 We've to touch each other? 174 00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:09,840 You can touch each other. 175 00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,160 You have two minutes. 176 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:14,120 Read it again. Yeah, I need to... 177 00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:18,680 Place half your hands. So one hand on one hip. On half your hips. 178 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:22,000 I don't understand this! I thought it meant half of my hand. 179 00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:23,640 Yeah, but collectively. 180 00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:25,640 And leave them there until the second part of 181 00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:27,520 the task is over. So, until it's done. 182 00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:29,840 Depending what the task is, we might be making it very difficult 183 00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:32,720 for ourselves by all having one hand where it could be much easier if 184 00:08:32,760 --> 00:08:35,080 one person to have two hands. 185 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:36,880 We should keep one pair of hands free. 186 00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:39,240 Oh! Oh, you're so good at this! 187 00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:40,560 I think your time starts now. 188 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,760 Like a conga? Are we congaing this, right? 189 00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:45,920 So do you wanna conga me? I'll conga you! 190 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:49,200 OK, fine. You have my consent. Yeah? There we go. 191 00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:51,480 I have your consent! Yeah, my hips are unhanded. 192 00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:54,080 And my hips are definitely being handled. WHISTLE BLOWS 193 00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:56,000 At the moment there are four hands on four hips. 194 00:08:56,040 --> 00:08:57,920 Yes, take your hand...that hand is free. 195 00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:01,760 One hand on your hip. And Dara still has both hands on...no! 196 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:03,240 Take the hand off her! 197 00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:05,440 My hands are here. 198 00:09:06,640 --> 00:09:08,520 ALEX: You're fine, John. So that hand's on that hip. 199 00:09:08,560 --> 00:09:10,240 FERN: I thought...I didn't understand it 200 00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:13,360 but John really doesn't understand it! 201 00:09:13,400 --> 00:09:17,000 I do understand it! With your hands on those hips at all times, put 202 00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:19,520 the most sand in the shopping trolley. 203 00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:20,640 You may only move 204 00:09:20,680 --> 00:09:23,440 the shopping trolley when there is one minute left on 205 00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,480 the clock. Oh, my God. You have ten minutes. 206 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:27,040 Your time starts now. 207 00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:28,520 So where is the sand? 208 00:09:28,560 --> 00:09:29,680 Exactly. Where is the sand? 209 00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:30,960 Right, let's go look for the sand. 210 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:33,240 OK, we got to go look for it. OK. 211 00:09:33,280 --> 00:09:35,000 John, don't put your... 212 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:37,600 You can only have one hand on my hip. 213 00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:39,760 How do you not understand that? Sorry. 214 00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:42,240 APPLAUSE 215 00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:48,480 Team of three, talk me through your tactics. 216 00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:50,080 DARA SIGHS 217 00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:54,640 We got the idea, hands have to be on hips. 218 00:09:54,680 --> 00:09:56,280 Yeah, absolutely. 219 00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:59,360 But we forgot that they could just be our own hips... Yeah. 220 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:01,480 And that was probably the most obvious thing to do, just 221 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:03,880 for one person to stand like that for the entire task. 222 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:06,680 For some reason we, we felt that we should human-centipede it. 223 00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:09,160 LAUGHTER 224 00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:12,960 But I think the fact that we all didn't realise that we could just 225 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,840 have one person doing that 226 00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:17,400 means that maybe the task wasn't that well written. 227 00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:18,480 Yeah. 228 00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:19,760 AUDIENCE: Ooh! 229 00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:23,160 Well, listen I don't write them, so... 230 00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:28,000 We were hoping for one of the teams to be stupid enough 231 00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:29,640 to put their hands on each other's hips 232 00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:32,240 but we weren't expecting everyone... SARAH LAUGHS 233 00:10:34,680 --> 00:10:37,040 It felt like it was more of a team when we were together. 234 00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:39,320 Yeah, we did both. It was divide and conga. 235 00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:43,200 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 236 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:47,560 Wow. 237 00:10:48,640 --> 00:10:51,160 OK. Do you want to carry on? Yes. Do you want a couple of minutes? 238 00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:52,960 No, go to VT. Are you sure? 239 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,240 Go to VT. OK. 240 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:57,560 Well, we're gonna see the Team Of Two first of all, 241 00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:00,440 so here's how Sarah and Munya got on. 242 00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:05,200 It's really hard to not do da-da, da, da, da, da, da. 243 00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,720 Hey. You may only move the shopping trolley when there's 244 00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:10,200 one minute left on the clock. 245 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:11,960 We need to get the trolley sand-proofed 246 00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:13,760 so it doesn't all leak out. 247 00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:16,560 They've got rid of all the buckets. 248 00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:17,920 There you go. 249 00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:20,200 Right, so I'm gonna scoop. 250 00:11:20,240 --> 00:11:22,240 Good work! 251 00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:24,360 One pot's not gonna be enough, is it? 252 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,360 Open your legs, cos I need to swing this. 253 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,000 SHE LAUGHS 254 00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:30,120 Just slide it in, yeah? Yeah. 255 00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:34,320 Yeah, cos the thing is, sometimes I lose my head. 256 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:35,880 How many minutes have we got left, Alex? 257 00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:38,160 Two minutes and 48. Two minutes? OK. Shit. And 48. 258 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:40,880 I'm gonna double-quick. Yeah. Left around. Don't let me go. 259 00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:43,400 No, not letting you go. 260 00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:45,320 Argh! Oh, are you all right? 261 00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:47,680 I crushed my fingers. Keep going. 262 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:50,280 You're such a hero. You've got one minute and 50seconds. 263 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:53,000 We're gonna have to really run for the trolley, you know. Yeah, good work. 264 00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:54,560 Count us down when it's ten, yeah? 265 00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:56,760 OK. As in one minute ten. 266 00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,800 It's now one minute ten. 267 00:11:57,840 --> 00:12:00,080 Let's get to the trolley. Ready? Go, go. 268 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,480 Go, go, go! 269 00:12:02,520 --> 00:12:04,520 Good, good, good, good, good. 270 00:12:04,560 --> 00:12:05,560 OK. 271 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,120 Argh! 272 00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,800 Go, go, go! Go, go! 273 00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:13,040 Whoa! 274 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:14,240 Are you all right? 275 00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:17,600 How long? 25 seconds. 276 00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:27,160 OK, let's get it. You get in first. 277 00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:28,960 Oh! 278 00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:30,960 Hold that open. 279 00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:35,880 How long? 280 00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:38,440 How long? WHISTLE BLOWS 281 00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:39,480 Ah, shit! 282 00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:42,200 You didn't even count us down. 283 00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:45,000 You didn't even count down. I said count at ten. 284 00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:47,520 One minute ten, you said. 285 00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:49,680 Oh, no! So close. 286 00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:51,520 You've got one bucket in. 287 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:56,840 Can I let go now? It's up to you. 288 00:12:56,880 --> 00:13:00,800 APPLAUSE 289 00:13:00,840 --> 00:13:03,760 I would have liked a separate camera just on Sarah 290 00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:06,240 and her contribution to the task, which was this... 291 00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:10,760 I had a lovely time. 292 00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:14,000 It was sort of permission to touch someone. Yeah. 293 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:15,320 It's nice. 294 00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:17,960 Munya said you could be more rough with his hips. 295 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:22,200 LAUGHTER 296 00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:25,520 Next... Well, actually, before we see the Team Of Three, 297 00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:29,080 one of them would like me to play a different video first. 298 00:13:29,120 --> 00:13:31,280 Mm-hm. So I'm gonna show you this. OK. 299 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:37,240 Hi, John. 300 00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:41,960 Hiya. You OK? 301 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:43,400 Er, yeah. 302 00:13:45,920 --> 00:13:49,640 TINKLING MUSIC PLAYS 303 00:13:49,680 --> 00:13:52,240 LAUGHING: Oh, God, what the fuck are you doing? 304 00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:53,280 Sh! 305 00:13:56,280 --> 00:13:57,600 Oh, man! 306 00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:01,760 Sabotage your team... 307 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:02,960 What?! 308 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,640 ..in the next task. 309 00:14:04,680 --> 00:14:09,840 If your team loses the task, you win five points. 310 00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:13,960 If your team wins the task, 311 00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:16,400 you win zero points. 312 00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:22,400 If your team accuses you of sabotaging the task.. 313 00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:27,400 WHEEZING LAUGH: ..you win zero points. 314 00:14:27,440 --> 00:14:30,320 So, the only way you win is if you lose. 315 00:14:30,360 --> 00:14:31,680 You understand? 316 00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:34,200 Yeah, well, I do understand, sadly. 317 00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:36,800 That's... Do you know what? That's nasty. 318 00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:38,760 Well, I'll let you think about that for a bit, John. 319 00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:40,800 Oh, man. Good luck. 320 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:42,200 Yeah, yeah. 321 00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:44,920 Oh, dear. 322 00:14:47,440 --> 00:14:49,880 He's not even making eye contact with us now, 323 00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:53,280 and this feels like one of your relatives have been talking 324 00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:56,400 to the FBI about you and then just silently lifts up their T-shirt 325 00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:59,280 and there's a microphone pack on their body. 326 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:01,120 Yeah, can I say, it's actually kind of a relief, 327 00:15:01,160 --> 00:15:03,120 cos at the time I thought he was an IDIOT. 328 00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:07,240 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 329 00:15:10,760 --> 00:15:12,280 Oh, fucking hell. 330 00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:16,760 John's been sitting on this for four months now. 331 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:19,160 You had such a go at me. 332 00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:21,200 We're set for something special here, aren't we? 333 00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:23,520 Yeah, but were gonna go to... I know, were gonna go to a break. 334 00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:28,040 I mean, when you come back, there'll be four chairs. 335 00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:30,440 OK, I've been working on a new end-of-part link for you, 336 00:15:30,480 --> 00:15:31,880 and here it is. 337 00:15:31,920 --> 00:15:33,440 BYE! 338 00:15:33,480 --> 00:15:34,480 APPLAUSE 339 00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:45,480 Hello, welcome back to Taskmaster, 340 00:15:45,520 --> 00:15:48,840 where a solo sabotage task has been set. 341 00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:52,120 Yes, it's true. John Kearns was given a secret task by me 342 00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,720 in a really cool, underhand sort of way. 343 00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:57,520 The legit team task is to get the most sand into 344 00:15:57,560 --> 00:15:59,720 the shopping trolley while they have half their hands on 345 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:02,480 half their hips. If John's team loses the task, 346 00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:05,040 John will win five fat points all to himself, 347 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:06,800 but if his team wins, he gets nothing. 348 00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:08,960 If you're Dara and Fern, it's pretty cruel. 349 00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:11,600 If you're everyone else watching, it's pretty exciting. 350 00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:14,840 So, here's how the Team Of Three got on. 351 00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:18,640 How fast do you want me to walk? 352 00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:20,240 I'd say faster than this. 353 00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:22,520 OK, well, I... It's in case... 354 00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:25,000 Dafty in the middle. 355 00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:26,480 Er... We need containers. 356 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:28,160 Is there a bucket, a bucket or something? 357 00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:29,480 Eight minutes. 358 00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:31,000 Hold on, John. 359 00:16:31,040 --> 00:16:34,240 Just move up nearer to my arse. 360 00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:36,880 You're crouching, you're crouching. 361 00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:40,960 You're just spreading it around. No, no, no. 362 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,520 Right, there's the pack of sand. 363 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,760 There's so many better ways we could have done this. 364 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:48,240 I mean, that's the one thing I have here, is time to reflect. 365 00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:50,160 I wouldn't complain, Dara, I think just... 366 00:16:50,200 --> 00:16:51,440 You're doing a lot of complaining 367 00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:53,600 and I'm doing a lot of the labour here. 368 00:16:53,640 --> 00:16:56,080 Honestly, you're both doing a brilliant job there. 369 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:02,680 I'm just reflecting. 370 00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:06,320 There's a much better way of doing... John! 371 00:17:06,360 --> 00:17:08,120 Why did you do that? 372 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,640 Oh, my God, did you knock it over? Why did you do that?! 373 00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:12,320 It goes back on, look. 374 00:17:12,360 --> 00:17:14,840 OK. OK. Sorry, Fern. 375 00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:17,040 What if we get one of these plant pots? 376 00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:19,040 Get that bucket over there, yeah. How long's left? 377 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,840 This is very... You're got four minutes 20. 378 00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:22,800 Oh, brilliant. This is the best plan. 379 00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:24,680 Hold on, John. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 380 00:17:24,720 --> 00:17:26,880 You coming in? Yeah. 381 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:28,080 Here we go. 382 00:17:28,120 --> 00:17:29,600 How you doing, Dara? 383 00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:33,080 I mean, I would sooner not be in this exact position 384 00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:34,880 for the entire task. Oh... 385 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:37,040 Oh, hang on, watch the bucket, it's sat behind me. 386 00:17:37,080 --> 00:17:40,440 I don't wanna knock over the bucket of sand. 387 00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:42,200 You have to go that way, you have to go that way. 388 00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,360 John, you have to go that way. John, you have to go that way. 389 00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,120 Well, I don't wanna knock over... You don't wanna knock it over. No, no, no. 390 00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:49,440 John, be really careful because you're... There we go. 391 00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:51,280 Where, where, where, where's the, er... 392 00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:53,760 Careful, careful. Careful, Careful, careful, careful! 393 00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:56,320 Oh, my God, we almost lost the hat. Again. 394 00:17:56,360 --> 00:17:58,200 Right, another bucket. Quick, another bucket. 395 00:17:58,240 --> 00:17:59,640 I don't know if there's time, you know. 396 00:17:59,680 --> 00:18:02,200 I think we should just make our way back. We've got time! 397 00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:03,800 Hold on, John! 398 00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:06,120 Under the rope, under the rope! 399 00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:07,760 Ah, fuck's sake. 400 00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:09,520 There's a hole in the bucket. 401 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:11,840 Oh, no. 402 00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:13,360 I think we should just go back. 403 00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:14,760 I just wanna get... 404 00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:18,280 We can't move it until at the one minute bell strikes. 405 00:18:18,320 --> 00:18:20,120 How long? You've now got one minute. 406 00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:22,360 One minute. Can we move it? Yes. 407 00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:24,600 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 408 00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:26,280 Right, come on, come on, come on. 409 00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:27,800 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 410 00:18:30,280 --> 00:18:32,720 See, this is when it all pays off. 411 00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:36,880 Do we have to put it back anywhere? No, you don't have to move it back. 412 00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:39,240 All the information's on the task there, John. 413 00:18:39,280 --> 00:18:42,600 WHEEZING LAUGHTER 414 00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:44,520 20 seconds, John. 415 00:18:44,560 --> 00:18:46,840 When there is one minute left on the clock... 416 00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:48,960 Put the, put the hat... Put the... Sorry. 417 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,240 Touch me. Put that in there. 418 00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:53,480 What? No, what are you doing? It has to be in the trolley. 419 00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:56,040 It's just in the trolley. Oh, I thought it had to be in one thing. 420 00:18:56,080 --> 00:18:57,280 No. Ten seconds. 421 00:18:58,360 --> 00:19:00,960 It says it has to be in one. No it doesn't say... What? Does it? 422 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,280 Yeah, yeah. Wait, does it say that? 423 00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:05,400 Does it say that? It does! 424 00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:07,920 John, you idiot. We've been fucking robbed. 425 00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:10,000 John! 426 00:19:10,040 --> 00:19:11,840 Yeah, that's your time up. 427 00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:13,720 Why did you do that? 428 00:19:13,760 --> 00:19:15,720 John just went mad. 429 00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:17,680 No, no, no, no, no. I dug that for ages. 430 00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:19,600 You threw all the sand out. 431 00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:21,280 There's so much fucking sand in there. 432 00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:24,400 John, don't. Don't do more. Please. 433 00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:26,800 You've just thrown all the sand out. 434 00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:30,120 I don't believe you threw out all the sand. Oh... 435 00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:37,520 I don't, I don't know, I don't know. 436 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:39,200 I don't know where to start. 437 00:19:39,240 --> 00:19:43,000 Fern had already called you "Dafty in the middle", 438 00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:46,400 before the task sabotage even started. 439 00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:47,640 LAUGHTER 440 00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:50,760 When he turned the hat upside down and just started laughing... 441 00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:52,280 LAUGHTER 442 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:54,400 ..and you just both went, "What are you doing?" 443 00:19:55,800 --> 00:19:57,320 I did so much work. 444 00:19:57,360 --> 00:19:59,120 I did most of the work in that task, 445 00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:03,320 and then, the whole time, Dara was just barking orders from the back, 446 00:20:03,360 --> 00:20:07,520 while John just mischievously did stuff in the middle... Yeah! 447 00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:09,560 ..so I felt like I did the most there. 448 00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:11,280 You were really industrious 449 00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:14,680 and I hope this pans out that you do get some points and John doesn't. 450 00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:17,640 I admit that I'm a bit worried, 451 00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:21,720 because although, you know, I got rid of the hat and that long tube, 452 00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:23,600 we both had one bucket of sand. 453 00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,400 Yeah, its close, it's very close. 454 00:20:25,440 --> 00:20:27,160 What do the scales say, baby? 455 00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:29,560 So, if the team of three win, John loses. 456 00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:32,240 If the team of two wins, John wins. Yep. 457 00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:36,480 The team of two got 21kg of sand. 21kg. 458 00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:38,040 How are you feeling? 459 00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:39,520 Hopeful. 460 00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:41,880 I'll wait till you've finished the rest of the sentence. 461 00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:43,200 LAUGHTER 462 00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:46,600 So, the team of three put in 20... 463 00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:48,680 Oh! 464 00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:50,200 ..point 9kg. 465 00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:51,920 THEY GROAN 466 00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:57,480 Some of it fell through the bottom of the thing cos you... 467 00:20:57,520 --> 00:21:00,880 Did you scoop it off the...the slats of the...of the trolley? 468 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:03,560 The slats were very thin. There was not a lot of sand on the slats. 469 00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:04,920 LAUGHTER 470 00:21:04,960 --> 00:21:07,000 So, there it is. So, what does that do points-wise? 471 00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:09,720 Well, it means, unfortunately, Dara and Fern don't get any points 472 00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:12,080 but all three - Sarah, Munya and John get five points. 473 00:21:12,120 --> 00:21:13,280 There it is. 474 00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:14,480 APPLAUSE 475 00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:19,840 Sometimes, dirty deeds pay. 476 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:22,040 Let's have a scoreboard, please, Horne. 477 00:21:22,080 --> 00:21:23,800 OK, I've got the scoreboard right here 478 00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:26,960 and John is having his best ever episode by miles. 479 00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:28,600 He's in the lead with ten points. 480 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:30,200 APPLAUSE 481 00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:36,760 Very good. Another task, please, little dolly. 482 00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:40,240 Right you are. And let's all scream for ice cream! 483 00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:55,520 Look what I made you. 484 00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:57,240 HE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY 485 00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:58,720 Ooh! 486 00:21:58,760 --> 00:22:00,000 LAUGHTER 487 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:01,520 Ooh! 488 00:22:01,560 --> 00:22:05,200 Mm. Goddamn! What's been going on in this room? 489 00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:07,440 Oh, ice cream. 490 00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:09,040 You like ice cream? 491 00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:10,720 I like some ice creams. 492 00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:12,920 Some of it looks gross. 493 00:22:14,360 --> 00:22:17,320 Identify the ice cream flavours. 494 00:22:17,360 --> 00:22:18,880 SHE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY 495 00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:22,400 The most correct ice cream flavours identified wins. 496 00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:23,560 You have ten minutes. 497 00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:26,360 And you must find every flavour delicious. 498 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:27,760 Delicious? 499 00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:28,960 Delicious! 500 00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:30,800 That's...controlling. 501 00:22:30,840 --> 00:22:32,080 LAUGHTER 502 00:22:32,120 --> 00:22:33,880 Your time starts, now. 503 00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:36,000 Alex, I'm on a no-sugar diet. 504 00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:38,840 You lot have done me dirty cos you've picked my one weakness. 505 00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:40,160 You want me to break my diet? 506 00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:42,520 Will it have an instant effect on your body? 507 00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:43,800 Then, I'd love to see it. 508 00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:45,440 LAUGHTER 509 00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:48,040 It's very important to find each flavour delicious. Mm. 510 00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:51,000 And there maybe more than one flavour in all of them, in fact. 511 00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:53,640 What are you talking about? 512 00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:55,160 LAUGHTER 513 00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,840 Right, so, I've got ten minutes to identify ice cream, 514 00:22:57,880 --> 00:22:59,280 not even tasting them. 515 00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:04,320 What is the sauce? 516 00:23:04,360 --> 00:23:06,040 What is it? Yes, what is it? 517 00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:07,720 APPLAUSE AND LAUGHTER 518 00:23:10,400 --> 00:23:12,640 I thought Fern sounded like she was in a kebab shop 519 00:23:12,680 --> 00:23:14,560 at 3am in the morning. Oh, I know. Play out? 520 00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:16,240 Yeah, I can play that sound. Here we go. 521 00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:17,760 What is the sauce? 522 00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:19,360 What is it? 523 00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:26,920 I'm sorry to say I just have the voice of a drunk person. 524 00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:28,360 LAUGHTER 525 00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:31,080 What's going on with this sugar thing, then, Munya, 526 00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:33,080 before I start judging you? 527 00:23:33,120 --> 00:23:34,560 You see the thing is, yeah, 528 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:38,080 the dentist told me I was 1mm away from a root canal. 529 00:23:38,120 --> 00:23:40,840 Oh, my God, I'm going to penalise you so heavily. 530 00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:42,240 No! 531 00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:45,040 Please, please! You want to see some? Yeah! 532 00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:47,440 OK, we're going to start with three of them first - 533 00:23:47,480 --> 00:23:50,720 Sarah, Munya and Fernya. Here we go. 534 00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:54,200 Mm... This one looks like it's going to be poo-flavoured. 535 00:23:57,360 --> 00:23:58,800 You must find it delicious, please. 536 00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:00,520 Oh, that's very nice. 537 00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:02,000 LAUGHTER 538 00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:07,160 What the fuck is that? 539 00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:12,000 That's a bit salty, that is. Mm. 540 00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:13,400 Wait. So, I can eat this. 541 00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:17,920 I know what it is but I know what it is. 542 00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:19,240 Dog biscuits. 543 00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:23,320 Argh, that's dog food, isn't it? 544 00:24:23,360 --> 00:24:24,640 That's dog food. 545 00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:26,480 Crisps, innit? 546 00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:28,200 Mm, delicious. 547 00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:30,200 That is fucking vile. 548 00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:31,520 Right, next one... 549 00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:38,360 Is it curry powder? OK. 550 00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:40,160 Tandoori ice cream. 551 00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:42,640 Coronation Chicken, innit? 552 00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:43,800 This one... 553 00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:46,600 Oh, wow! 554 00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:49,880 Wowzers. 555 00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:53,520 Oof! 556 00:24:55,320 --> 00:24:57,040 Just smells of nothing. 557 00:24:57,080 --> 00:24:58,640 Chilli and... 558 00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:00,560 ..let's go mango. 559 00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:04,160 How about mash ice cream cos it's got the consistency of mash? 560 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:05,960 Some sort of Mexican flavour. 561 00:25:08,400 --> 00:25:09,920 I've been doing really well, so far. 562 00:25:12,640 --> 00:25:13,640 Mm. 563 00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:15,080 Cream flavour! 564 00:25:15,120 --> 00:25:17,040 Cream flavour ice cream? 565 00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:18,920 Uh-oh. 566 00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:20,720 Is there something else? 567 00:25:20,760 --> 00:25:22,440 Oh, is it breast milk? 568 00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:24,280 Coconut liquorice. 569 00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:25,840 That sounds nice. 570 00:25:25,880 --> 00:25:28,440 I think it's vanilla. I think it's a curveball. 571 00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:31,760 White chocolate and breast milk. Mm! 572 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,520 Cos that is a thing. 573 00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,520 I don't do olives. Tiny, shitty grapes. 574 00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:38,920 You've only got one and a half minutes. Oh, go to hell. 575 00:25:38,960 --> 00:25:40,880 I'm just going to have the green stuff. 576 00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:44,440 You must find each flavour delicious. 577 00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:46,920 LAUGHTER 578 00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:49,840 Olive green smoothie. That's my...that's my answer. 579 00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:53,320 Oh, I've been excited about this one. The last one. 580 00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:55,840 I've never said, "That's vile", before and gone in for more. 581 00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:57,880 Also, you have to say it's delicious. 582 00:25:57,920 --> 00:25:59,840 Oh, sorry! That's northern for delicious. 583 00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:01,720 Petrol or something. 584 00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:04,320 Maybe something cheesy? OK. 585 00:26:04,360 --> 00:26:07,360 Fucking salt and petrol or something. 586 00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:09,280 Urgh. Please, find it delicious. 587 00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:11,520 Urgh! 588 00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:17,320 It's so horrible! 589 00:26:17,360 --> 00:26:18,400 WHISTLE BLOWS 590 00:26:18,440 --> 00:26:19,640 You can stop now. 591 00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:20,880 Urgh! 592 00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:22,320 APPLAUSE 593 00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:25,440 I mean, on reflection, 594 00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:28,920 you sounded like you were in a kebab house throughout. 595 00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:31,080 This whole thing, I don't know how to... 596 00:26:31,120 --> 00:26:32,680 Whether I'm going to penalise people 597 00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:35,480 because you were supposed to make out it was delicious throughout. 598 00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:39,000 Sarah, the very first thing you said after tasted one is, and I quote, 599 00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:40,440 "What the fuck is that?" 600 00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:41,640 LAUGHTER 601 00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:44,760 Like, "Ooh, what the fuck is that? Mm." 602 00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:46,400 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 603 00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:52,240 Munya, you appeared to be trying to smell flavours 604 00:26:52,280 --> 00:26:55,520 to avoid a solitary filling. 605 00:26:55,560 --> 00:26:58,800 I think it's more of an achievement to have snorted ice cream 606 00:26:58,840 --> 00:27:00,520 cos I got that one right, didn't I? 607 00:27:00,560 --> 00:27:02,960 There were ten flavours, there. You got one of the ten. 608 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:05,600 Shall I tell you what the actual flavours were? Please. 609 00:27:05,640 --> 00:27:09,000 The dog food one, they thought was dog food was marmite and porridge. 610 00:27:09,040 --> 00:27:10,640 Then, we had curry and naan bread. 611 00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:12,480 We've accepted most of their curry answers. 612 00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:15,120 Cornflakes and chilli. Most of them got chilli. 613 00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:17,800 Then, we had white chocolate and macaroni cheese, 614 00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:20,480 and then, the petrol one was bechamel sauce 615 00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:21,960 and Brussels sprout puree. 616 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:24,000 Bechamel, beautiful, beautiful. 617 00:27:24,040 --> 00:27:26,760 So, out of them, Munya only got one flavour, 618 00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:29,160 Sarah - two, Fern - three of the flavours. 619 00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:32,400 Does something cheesy not count as macaroni cheese? 620 00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:33,640 No. 621 00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:35,200 LAUGHTER 622 00:27:35,240 --> 00:27:36,720 All right, it's the end of Part Two. 623 00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:39,160 Now, tell him to get his hands out of his pyjama bottoms 624 00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:40,880 and go and make you a cup of tea. 625 00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:42,120 APPLAUSE 626 00:27:50,680 --> 00:27:51,920 APPLAUSE 627 00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,400 Oh, hello! 628 00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:56,680 Welcome back to Part Three of Taskmaster. Where were we, Alex? 629 00:27:56,720 --> 00:27:59,120 Oh, I'm so sorry, I appear to have gone all coy. 630 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:02,440 I'm back! Ice cream flavour identification, 631 00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:05,840 that's where we were, and now, for the final two, it's John and Dara. 632 00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,040 This is going to be rancid. 633 00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:13,840 Oh, it's very nice. 634 00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:17,760 Delicious. 635 00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:20,040 I mean, that's like white chocolate. 636 00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:22,200 Is it white chocolate? 637 00:28:22,240 --> 00:28:24,720 OK, white chocolate... There's bits in that, there's bits. 638 00:28:24,760 --> 00:28:26,880 Right, tell me about the bits. 639 00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:28,600 Marshmallow. 640 00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:34,120 Oh, a delicious kick off that. 641 00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:36,360 LAUGHTER 642 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:40,640 Oh, Jesus Christ! 643 00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:44,200 Would you like a glass of water? Oh, yeah. 644 00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:46,840 Delicious water coming up. Mm! 645 00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:48,360 Sweet Jesus. 646 00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:55,160 Oh! 647 00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:56,960 HE LAUGHS 648 00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,600 Chilli. Sounds nice. 649 00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:02,680 It's not just nice, it's delicious. 650 00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:04,480 This thing's driving me crazy. 651 00:29:08,360 --> 00:29:10,360 LAUGHTER 652 00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:12,280 Wasabi maybe? 653 00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:14,400 Wasabi. 654 00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:15,600 Wasabi? 655 00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:19,880 It's curry. 656 00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:21,680 Tikka Masala. 657 00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:30,040 OK, we're in the last 45 seconds. 658 00:29:30,080 --> 00:29:31,760 WHISPERS: It's delicious. 659 00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:33,200 LAUGHTER 660 00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:35,160 There might be more than one flavour in... 661 00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:37,320 Yeah, no, I think you've really gone to town here. Mm. 662 00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:38,760 Yeah, it's Marmite. 663 00:29:38,800 --> 00:29:40,160 Marmite. OK. 664 00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:41,400 WHISTLE BLOWS 665 00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:44,040 Delicious. Oh, it was delicious. What a treat! 666 00:29:49,720 --> 00:29:51,480 Well, I must commend both gentlemen 667 00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:54,000 for making an effort with the deliciousness. Thank you. 668 00:29:54,040 --> 00:29:57,240 The first contestants so far to pretend they liked it. 669 00:29:57,280 --> 00:30:01,000 I particularly enjoyed Dara's, "There's a delicious kick off that." 670 00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,120 LAUGHTER 671 00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:06,200 And you both did some great face-acting as well. 672 00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:08,800 That was not acting. That was a genuine human response 673 00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:12,120 to my body wanting to expel what I just put into it. 674 00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:13,520 LAUGHTER 675 00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:15,040 They seemed pretty good, though. 676 00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:17,600 Well, they both got the Marmite, which was very pleasing. 677 00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:19,360 They both got curry and white chocolate. 678 00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:21,520 But Dara got one extra cos he got the chilli as well. 679 00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:24,440 So, it means that Munya only gets the one point, then. 680 00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:25,760 Sarah gets two points, 681 00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:28,520 John and Fern come joint second, having guessed three flavours, 682 00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:30,040 so they get four points each. 683 00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:33,240 But the winner of this task is Dara O Briain. He gets five points. 684 00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:34,520 APPLAUSE 685 00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:37,120 Next task, please. 686 00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:39,440 OK. Ready? Catch! 687 00:30:54,960 --> 00:30:56,920 What up, my slime? 688 00:30:56,960 --> 00:30:58,880 Ah! What up? 689 00:30:58,920 --> 00:31:00,720 Hello. Oh, hello, Fern. 690 00:31:05,480 --> 00:31:06,800 Catch something. 691 00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:08,240 Catch something. 692 00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:10,080 The most spectacular catch wins. 693 00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:11,560 You have 20 minutes. 694 00:31:11,600 --> 00:31:13,240 Time starts, now. 695 00:31:13,280 --> 00:31:15,440 Has anybody got Covid, no? No, I don't have Covid. 696 00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:18,560 Have you got any sort of infectious diseases? 697 00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:20,760 I had appendicitis, when I was eight. 698 00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:21,840 Oh. 699 00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:24,400 I remember catching something, when I was a kid. 700 00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:27,000 My dad kicked an American football in the air. 701 00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:29,600 I really remember... 702 00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:31,200 ..catching it. 703 00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:32,440 Are you good at catching? 704 00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:34,720 Yeah, if I can see the thing coming. 705 00:31:34,760 --> 00:31:37,200 But how much better and more spectacular would it be, 706 00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:38,520 if I couldn't see it coming? 707 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:41,360 Oh, my God! So, my first thought is just illnesses 708 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:44,080 but I just don't think any of us have got time. 709 00:31:44,120 --> 00:31:46,400 So, first things first, I need a ball. 710 00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:48,360 I'm just going to find a ball, Alex, OK? OK. 711 00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:50,520 You stay right there, my slime. 712 00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:51,840 What do you catch? 713 00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:53,440 You catch a fish. 714 00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:56,000 But everyone's going to say catch a fish. 715 00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:59,200 What could I catch? Nothing's alive in here. 716 00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:02,240 You don't want to go outside and just catch things? 717 00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:04,720 What would I catch outside, the birds? 718 00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:07,400 Uh, I wouldn't worry about animals. 719 00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:08,680 People? 720 00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:11,040 Kidnap? 721 00:32:11,080 --> 00:32:12,400 LAUGHTER 722 00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:15,000 Also, whenever there's one of these, you have to do it. 723 00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:16,120 HORN TOOTS 724 00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:17,160 SHE MIMICS THE HORN 725 00:32:17,200 --> 00:32:18,880 Mine's better. Mine's always better. 726 00:32:18,920 --> 00:32:20,320 It's shit. 727 00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:21,720 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 728 00:32:24,240 --> 00:32:27,600 So, your first three instincts of what you could catch, Fern, 729 00:32:27,640 --> 00:32:30,760 are a fish, a bird, people. 730 00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:32,680 Yes. 731 00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:35,440 I thought that was all obvious things to say. 732 00:32:35,480 --> 00:32:37,880 John, do you want to tell us more about the moving story 733 00:32:37,920 --> 00:32:39,560 from your youth, before we crack on? 734 00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:41,000 LAUGHTER 735 00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:43,840 Honestly, it's...it's a vivid childhood memory 736 00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:47,200 that I caught it and I kept on running. 737 00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:48,720 LAUGHTER 738 00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:51,680 And you've not...you've not seen any of your family since. 739 00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:56,560 Let's see some spectacular catches. 740 00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,720 Fine. Yes, it's a simple task - most spectacular catch wins. 741 00:32:59,760 --> 00:33:03,360 We're going to start with Mun and Jun. Here we go. 742 00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:04,920 Alex... 743 00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:06,400 ..how good are you at throwing? 744 00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:07,800 Pretty good. 745 00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,960 Well, I was thinking of maybe punting it over the house, 746 00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:14,360 and then, running around and catching it. 747 00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:16,440 I'm going to sit on Greg's shoulders 748 00:33:16,480 --> 00:33:19,080 and you're going to go all the way to the other side of the house 749 00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,680 and throw the ball into my bucket, yeah? 750 00:33:21,720 --> 00:33:22,920 Yes. 751 00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:26,960 Right then... 752 00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:28,320 Throw it! 753 00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:32,560 Oh, no. 754 00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:34,360 Alex, more power! 755 00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:36,000 More power. 756 00:33:41,320 --> 00:33:43,080 Right, I've just got to go high. 757 00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:44,360 Oh, dear. 758 00:33:44,400 --> 00:33:46,080 No, Alex. Come on! 759 00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:47,480 ALEX GROANS 760 00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:49,560 No, and again! 761 00:33:51,680 --> 00:33:53,640 More power! Oh, fuck! 762 00:33:53,680 --> 00:33:55,200 Don't swear at me, Alex. 763 00:33:56,640 --> 00:33:58,920 HE GROANS 764 00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:00,640 Go on, go on! 765 00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:04,560 Oh, fuck! 766 00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:07,160 The problem is I'm not around here, when it lands. 767 00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:08,640 LAUGHTER 768 00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:10,240 No! My arm hurts. 769 00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:12,560 Everyone watching this right now thinks we can't do it. 770 00:34:12,600 --> 00:34:13,800 I don't think we can do it. 771 00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:16,080 But that's what's going to make it impressive, right? 772 00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:18,760 Let me see that fire. Go on, let's say, "Argh!" Argh. 773 00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:21,280 No, listen to me, again, you're half holding back. 774 00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:23,800 I want you to just go argh! I'm cold. My shoulder hurts. 775 00:34:23,840 --> 00:34:25,240 Argh. 776 00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:26,760 Argh! 777 00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:29,200 Yes, nearly, Alex. One more! 778 00:34:31,520 --> 00:34:34,880 Oh, that's the way to go, though. 779 00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:36,440 Yeah! Oh, Alex, we nearly had it! 780 00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:37,880 AUDIENCE GROANS 781 00:34:37,920 --> 00:34:39,280 One more, one more! 782 00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:40,720 ALEX GROANS 783 00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:44,320 Yeah! Oh, no! 784 00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:46,720 WHISPERS: Oh, shit. 785 00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:48,360 Go on. 786 00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:55,920 Well, something's happened. 787 00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:57,320 Something's fucking happened! 788 00:34:57,360 --> 00:34:59,440 APPLAUSE 789 00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:01,880 I caught one. I'll take that. 790 00:35:01,920 --> 00:35:03,400 This is my last ball. 791 00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:04,960 Are you ready? 792 00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:07,080 Yeah! OK, here we go, Munya. 793 00:35:08,240 --> 00:35:09,400 WHISPERS: Come on. 794 00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:23,240 Argh! 795 00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:25,920 Did you catch it? Nooo! 796 00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:27,840 APPLAUSE 797 00:35:32,440 --> 00:35:36,160 What was it you said, when Munya quite reasonably asked you 798 00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:38,120 to put more power into your throw? 799 00:35:38,160 --> 00:35:39,640 I don't know, what did I say? 800 00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:41,160 I'll tell you what you said. Right. 801 00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:43,480 You whispered to yourself, "Fuck sake." 802 00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:44,960 LAUGHTER 803 00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:52,800 13 series and that's the first time you've ever sworn. First time, yeah. 804 00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:55,080 Well, how do you think that made Munya... 805 00:35:55,120 --> 00:35:56,680 Look at Munya's face, now. Yeah. 806 00:35:56,720 --> 00:35:58,520 He's only 21 or something. 807 00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:01,280 First time...first time I've ever sworn. 808 00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:03,160 John, this is what I wrote down - 809 00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:05,920 "When I was at primary school there was a boy called Morgan, 810 00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:07,280 "who got sent home one day 811 00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:09,680 "because he tried to eat the hood off his own coat." 812 00:36:09,720 --> 00:36:11,360 LAUGHTER 813 00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:19,160 Throughout that task, you reminded me of Morgan. 814 00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:25,680 OK, next up, like all of us, she's scared of fires. 815 00:36:25,720 --> 00:36:27,400 Yes, it's Bern Afrady. 816 00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:59,120 Oh, lovely. 817 00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:01,040 20 minutes, 20 minutes. 818 00:37:01,080 --> 00:37:03,400 I caught a falling star. 819 00:37:03,440 --> 00:37:07,680 I know. Powered only by turquoise fart. 820 00:37:07,720 --> 00:37:09,200 LAUGHTER 821 00:37:09,240 --> 00:37:10,400 Yes. 822 00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:13,080 Greg, I thought I'd show a little making of video, 823 00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:16,360 so we can all admire the effort that Fern put into hers. 824 00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:23,400 FERN GROANS 825 00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:31,280 OK, let's have a break. 826 00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:34,000 When we return, the high-octane action continues 827 00:37:34,040 --> 00:37:36,680 and someone wins a dry skin foot scraper. 828 00:37:36,720 --> 00:37:38,040 HE GASPS 829 00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:39,320 APPLAUSE 830 00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:51,160 APPLAUSE 831 00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:54,480 Oh, no! Oh, yes! It's the final part of the show 832 00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:56,880 and the current task involves catching. 833 00:37:56,920 --> 00:37:58,120 Recap, Alex. 834 00:37:58,160 --> 00:38:00,320 It's a simple task - most spectacular catch wins. 835 00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:03,000 We've had some classic catching and some CGI catching, so far. 836 00:38:03,040 --> 00:38:05,000 Next up, it's not the mayor of silicon. 837 00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:06,760 No, It's Sarah Millican. 838 00:38:39,520 --> 00:38:41,080 APPLAUSE 839 00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:43,440 Pretty clever. 840 00:38:43,480 --> 00:38:45,800 She caught fire. Enchanting. 841 00:38:45,840 --> 00:38:47,520 I...I got it. Yeah, sorry. 842 00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:50,760 I particularly liked the... 843 00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:51,960 HE BLOWS 844 00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:56,000 Yeah. ..the romance of that with this twat in the background. 845 00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:58,720 Yeah, I wasn't sure he was going to be in the actual edit. 846 00:38:58,760 --> 00:39:00,160 Oh, really? 847 00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:03,280 I thought it was supposed to look like I was blowing it out. 848 00:39:03,320 --> 00:39:05,920 It did sort of mess with the romance of it a little bit, didn't it? 849 00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:08,520 I really enjoyed... I'd never used a fire extinguisher before. 850 00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:09,800 I now use them all the time. 851 00:39:09,840 --> 00:39:11,760 Last one? Last one, yes. 852 00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:16,240 Finally, it's the date of birth himself, DOB, Dara O Briain. 853 00:39:16,280 --> 00:39:17,960 Oh! 854 00:39:20,760 --> 00:39:23,600 Wait there, little one. You wait there. 855 00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:25,320 I will close the door. 856 00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:33,040 Oh, my baby! 857 00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:34,480 No! 858 00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:41,320 What is happening to my baby?! 859 00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:43,520 Who will save my baby?! 860 00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:50,920 Nooo! 861 00:39:55,680 --> 00:39:57,400 Will somebody catch my baby?! 862 00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:02,560 Ooh! 863 00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:04,880 APPLAUSE AND CHEERING 864 00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:11,800 Dara, it was a hauntingly beautiful tale. 865 00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:13,760 All that we need to do is to give the film a title 866 00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:15,840 and then we can move on and give some points out. 867 00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:18,080 Well, obviously Ooh, My Baby. 868 00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:22,840 Ooh, My Baby it is. Right. Here come some points. 869 00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:26,400 Yes. Do you wanna do the least-spectacular catch first? Yeah, course, and I feel sorry for him 870 00:40:26,440 --> 00:40:27,960 because he really did try, 871 00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:30,120 but someone didn't put enough power 872 00:40:30,160 --> 00:40:32,280 into their fucking throws, did they? 873 00:40:32,320 --> 00:40:33,880 Fuck's sake. So... 874 00:40:35,440 --> 00:40:37,560 It's not right hearing him swear, is it? 875 00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:39,920 No. Feels wrong. He didn't actually do any catches. 876 00:40:39,960 --> 00:40:42,120 No, but give the boy a point, for God's sake. 877 00:40:42,160 --> 00:40:44,800 Please. OK, so one point to Munya Chawawa. Yes. OK. 878 00:40:44,840 --> 00:40:47,320 Amazingly, getting two points just because there was 879 00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:50,920 a catch involved, John gets two points. 880 00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:52,880 Well done, John. Three points - 881 00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:54,840 and I blame you for this as well, 882 00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:58,000 because if you'd been airbrush CGI'd out of it 883 00:40:58,040 --> 00:41:00,240 and I could have just seen her hauntingly blowing 884 00:41:00,280 --> 00:41:02,360 the flames out, then she might have been up higher. 885 00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:03,760 So three points - your fault. 886 00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:05,760 Yep, good, good, good. Three to Sarah. 887 00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:07,920 Four points for the disturbing 888 00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:09,480 and yet comforting film 889 00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:10,960 of a woman who plucked 890 00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:12,960 a star from the sky... Lovely. 891 00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:16,200 ..under the power of her own flatulence go to Fern, 892 00:41:16,240 --> 00:41:19,960 and finally... how could Ooh, My Baby get 893 00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:23,120 anything than a deserved five points? 894 00:41:23,160 --> 00:41:25,840 Five points toDara O Briain. APPLAUSE AND CHEERING 895 00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:30,000 Please stay where you are while Alex 896 00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:32,720 and I head to the stage... AUDIENCE: Ooooh! 897 00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:34,880 ..for the final task of the show. 898 00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:46,120 Hello. Who will read the task? 899 00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:49,000 John Kearns, the leader. 900 00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:50,480 And a liar. 901 00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:58,280 "Predict whether an item will create a higher or lower number of decibels 902 00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:01,000 "than the previous item. 903 00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:04,440 "If you are wrong, you are out. 904 00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:07,800 "Last player standing wins." 905 00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:09,400 Yes, so, very simply, 906 00:42:09,440 --> 00:42:11,360 Greg is gonna make a noise. 907 00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:14,720 I am. He's then gonna tell you what he's gonna do with the next one, 908 00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:17,760 and you have to predict whether that noise is gonna be louder or quieter 909 00:42:17,800 --> 00:42:19,360 than the previous noise. 910 00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:21,800 You have paddles there with "higher" or "lower" on. 911 00:42:21,840 --> 00:42:24,400 If you're wrong, you're out, unless all of you are wrong, and then 912 00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:26,880 we'll move onto the next one. But once you're out, you're out. 913 00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:29,240 It's a rip-off of Play Your Cards Right. 914 00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:33,560 So were going to start off with the opening noise. 915 00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:35,200 A simple horn. 916 00:42:35,240 --> 00:42:37,080 Sarah, would you like to do yours before I commence? 917 00:42:37,120 --> 00:42:39,160 IMITATES HORN PARPING Thank you. 918 00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:41,440 And now the horn proper. 919 00:42:46,720 --> 00:42:51,280 And that is 107 decibels. 107. 920 00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:53,440 And now were in gameplay. 921 00:42:53,480 --> 00:42:55,080 CHUCKLING 922 00:42:55,120 --> 00:42:58,880 This noise is going to be a packet of cereal landing on a bar. 923 00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:03,920 Will that be higher or lower than 107 decibels? 924 00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:05,080 Have a think. 925 00:43:05,120 --> 00:43:08,000 Please reveal your guesses now. 926 00:43:09,840 --> 00:43:11,440 OK, we have three highers, two lowers. 927 00:43:11,480 --> 00:43:14,080 We're going to lose some people here. Some people are going out. 928 00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:17,240 John and Sarah think lower, the rest think higher. 929 00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:18,760 Are you ready, Greg? 930 00:43:20,200 --> 00:43:22,920 MURMURING That's got to be louder. 931 00:43:22,960 --> 00:43:25,880 Real problems cos I didn't press the right button on the... 932 00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:31,160 APPLAUSE AND CHEERING 933 00:43:34,640 --> 00:43:37,040 This is to beat 107 decibels. 934 00:43:37,080 --> 00:43:38,840 Tell me to release the cereal. 935 00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:40,240 Release the cereal. 936 00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:45,400 It's 101.9 decibels. 937 00:43:45,440 --> 00:43:46,640 GASPING 938 00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:48,560 It's already down to two people. 939 00:43:50,080 --> 00:43:53,200 The lowers are John Kearns and Sarah Millican. 940 00:43:53,240 --> 00:43:57,240 This time Greg is going to attack the marbles with 941 00:43:57,280 --> 00:43:58,800 an electric toothbrush? 942 00:43:58,840 --> 00:44:01,560 It's an electric toothbrush, and I'll be thrusting it 943 00:44:01,600 --> 00:44:04,320 in and out of marbles in a regulation manner. 944 00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:10,160 OK, so do you think that's gonna be higher or lower than 945 00:44:10,200 --> 00:44:11,960 the release of cereal onto a bar? 946 00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:14,880 Are you gonna be jabbing or are you gonna be rolling? 947 00:44:14,920 --> 00:44:16,360 I'm sorry, John, I did say 948 00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,920 I'd be thrusting it in and out of the marbles 949 00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:20,520 in a regulation manner. 950 00:44:24,360 --> 00:44:26,640 So will it be higher or lower than 101.9? 951 00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:29,080 Please release your paddles now. 952 00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:32,760 Ooh, this is going to be the end of the task! 953 00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:34,240 Oh, we're going to get ourselves... 954 00:44:35,440 --> 00:44:39,000 We've got a higher and lower, and if this is lower than 101.9, 955 00:44:39,040 --> 00:44:41,840 then Sarah Millican wins. If it's higher than 101.9, 956 00:44:41,880 --> 00:44:44,280 John Kearns, the unlikely candidate, wins. 957 00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:46,600 Let's dance. 958 00:44:46,640 --> 00:44:49,320 BUZZING The brush is on. 959 00:44:49,360 --> 00:44:50,920 Let the thrust commence. 960 00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,760 You did what you said you were gonna do. 961 00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:05,320 And that was 962 00:45:05,360 --> 00:45:09,000 90.7 decibels, which means the winner - already - 963 00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:10,840 is Sarah Millican. 964 00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:12,840 APPLAUSE AND CHEERING There it is. 965 00:45:15,360 --> 00:45:18,840 Let's go back down and see how that's affected the final scores. 966 00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:29,000 The points for that one, we have three people in joint third. 967 00:45:29,040 --> 00:45:32,920 That was, of course, Dara, Munya and Fern. 968 00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:35,120 They all get three points each. 969 00:45:35,160 --> 00:45:37,520 Four points for second place was John, 970 00:45:37,560 --> 00:45:40,000 just behind Sarah Millican, who gets five points. 971 00:45:42,840 --> 00:45:47,040 So... It's John Kearns in the lead, with 20 points! Well done, John. 972 00:45:47,080 --> 00:45:49,560 CHEERING 973 00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:54,040 Wow! What?! John Kearns wins! 974 00:45:54,080 --> 00:45:59,000 Please go and surround yourself with your Sunday funday prizes. 975 00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:04,600 So, what have we learnt today? 976 00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:07,280 We've learnt that if you find yourself on a night out 977 00:46:07,320 --> 00:46:10,040 with your friends, and you've had a little too much to drink 978 00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:13,280 and you're feeling peckish, before you pop that late-night snack 979 00:46:13,320 --> 00:46:16,560 into your mouth, don't forget to ask yourself... 980 00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:19,600 FERN: What is the sauce?! What IS that?! 981 00:46:21,560 --> 00:46:23,720 This episode is over but I want you to all go to bed 982 00:46:23,760 --> 00:46:25,360 thinking about tonight's winner. 983 00:46:25,400 --> 00:46:29,160 Unbelievably, it is John Kearns! 984 00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:31,840 APPLAUSE AND CHEERING 985 00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:53,080 Subtitles by Red Bee Media