1 00:00:39,005 --> 00:00:40,921 ♫ ♫ 2 00:00:41,005 --> 00:00:44,005 (audience laughter) 3 00:00:48,546 --> 00:00:49,921 JESS: It was a scary week. 4 00:00:50,005 --> 00:00:52,630 'Cause here's what you got to understand. 5 00:00:52,713 --> 00:00:54,421 A hit television show today– 6 00:00:54,505 --> 00:00:57,505 a big hit television show– what does it get? 7 00:00:57,588 --> 00:00:58,630 Ten million viewers. 8 00:00:58,713 --> 00:01:01,171 Let's go crazy and say 15. 9 00:01:01,255 --> 00:01:05,046 15 million viewers, 'cause this is a big, giant hit. 10 00:01:05,130 --> 00:01:07,213 Here's what you got to understand. 11 00:01:07,296 --> 00:01:10,338 I Love Lucy; 60 million. 12 00:01:10,421 --> 00:01:12,088 Oh, yeah. (chuckles) 13 00:01:12,171 --> 00:01:15,505 It's been a long time, but I remember that week. 14 00:01:15,588 --> 00:01:18,421 That was a scary week. 15 00:01:18,505 --> 00:01:20,296 It was a very scary week. 16 00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:22,755 Those guys scare too easy. 17 00:01:22,838 --> 00:01:24,171 I'm from the Midwest. 18 00:01:24,255 --> 00:01:26,088 I've lived through the Depression, the Dust Bowl. 19 00:01:26,171 --> 00:01:27,255 I don't scare that easy. 20 00:01:27,338 --> 00:01:30,505 But, yeah, it was a scary goddamn week. 21 00:01:30,588 --> 00:01:33,296 Department stores used to be open late on Monday nights. 22 00:01:33,380 --> 00:01:35,255 Then they switched to Thursday night. 23 00:01:35,338 --> 00:01:36,463 You know why? 24 00:01:36,546 --> 00:01:40,171 'Cause nobody was leaving home during I Love Lucy on Mondays. 25 00:01:40,255 --> 00:01:44,171 There was a significant drop-off in the number of people using water 26 00:01:44,255 --> 00:01:46,505 between 9:00 and 9:30 on Monday nights. 27 00:01:46,588 --> 00:01:47,838 Out of the blue… 28 00:01:47,921 --> 00:01:50,130 Everyone almost lost their jobs. 29 00:01:50,213 --> 00:01:52,880 Lucy and Desi almost lost their lives. 30 00:01:52,963 --> 00:01:54,380 Out of thin air. 31 00:01:54,463 --> 00:01:56,838 You're asking when did they find out? 32 00:01:56,921 --> 00:01:59,755 Same time as everyone else, listening to Walter Winchell. 33 00:01:59,838 --> 00:02:04,421 I'm minding my own business, listening to Walter Winchell, and bam. 34 00:02:04,505 --> 00:02:06,671 At the end of the broadcast. 35 00:02:06,755 --> 00:02:09,005 This is what you got to understand. 36 00:02:09,088 --> 00:02:13,296 It wasn't small potatoes when Winchell ended his broadcast by saying… 37 00:02:13,380 --> 00:02:15,963 “Lucille Ball is a Communist.” 38 00:02:17,296 --> 00:02:18,505 Just like that. 39 00:02:18,588 --> 00:02:21,880 Lucille Ball is a member of the Communist Party. 40 00:02:21,963 --> 00:02:24,838 - Yeah. - And she'd already seen the magazine story 41 00:02:24,921 --> 00:02:28,255 about Desi when Winchell came on. 42 00:02:28,338 --> 00:02:29,880 The magazine came out on Mondays, 43 00:02:29,963 --> 00:02:32,338 but her publicist brought her a copy on Sunday night. 44 00:02:32,421 --> 00:02:34,505 What were they doing when they first heard the news? 45 00:02:34,588 --> 00:02:35,505 What were they doing? 46 00:02:35,588 --> 00:02:37,755 I don't know what Lucy and Desi were doing, 47 00:02:37,838 --> 00:02:41,005 but it was Lucy and Desi, so they were either tearing each other's heads off 48 00:02:41,088 --> 00:02:42,588 or tearing each other's clothes off. 49 00:02:42,671 --> 00:02:45,796 ANNOUNCER: (over radio) It's time, America, time for Walter Winchell. 50 00:02:45,880 --> 00:02:48,880 Presented to you by Gruen, the Precision watch. 51 00:02:48,963 --> 00:02:51,171 Gruen, the finest watch you can wear. 52 00:02:51,255 --> 00:02:53,630 - Gruen, the finest watch you can give, brings you the man… - (door opens) 53 00:02:53,713 --> 00:02:55,838 - DESI: Lucy, I'm home. - (door closes) 54 00:02:55,921 --> 00:02:58,796 LUCILLE: Where the hell have you been, you Cuban dimwit?! 55 00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:00,213 DESI: Oye, easy does it. 56 00:03:00,296 --> 00:03:02,130 LUCILLE: You philandering bongo player! 57 00:03:02,213 --> 00:03:03,505 - DESI: I was playing cards with– - (slap) 58 00:03:03,588 --> 00:03:05,588 - Hey! I was playing cards with– coño. - (slap) 59 00:03:05,671 --> 00:03:07,713 - Oh, damn it. - You tell me when it starts to hurt. 60 00:03:07,796 --> 00:03:09,046 ♫ ♫ 61 00:03:09,130 --> 00:03:11,338 - LUCILLE: The boat? The… - DESI: Yes, we were playing cards on the boat. 62 00:03:11,421 --> 00:03:14,171 LUCILLE: Since last night? Since 27 hours ago? 63 00:03:14,255 --> 00:03:16,255 - DESI: Yes. - And you couldn't get to a phone? 64 00:03:16,338 --> 00:03:17,421 - DESI: No. - Why? 65 00:03:17,505 --> 00:03:18,671 DESI: I was passed out a lot of that time. 66 00:03:18,755 --> 00:03:19,796 (Lucille groans angrily) 67 00:03:21,130 --> 00:03:23,838 LUCILLE: That's tomorrow's Confidential. 68 00:03:23,921 --> 00:03:25,588 DESI: Why do you even read that magazine? 69 00:03:25,671 --> 00:03:27,130 - LUCILLE: Why do I even– Well, in this case… - (Desi groans) 70 00:03:27,213 --> 00:03:29,213 …it's 'cause my husband's on the cover with another woman. 71 00:03:29,296 --> 00:03:30,921 So it caught my eye. 72 00:03:31,005 --> 00:03:33,088 The story chronicles a night on the town with you and the… 73 00:03:33,171 --> 00:03:34,630 DESI: That's somebody's niece. 74 00:03:34,713 --> 00:03:36,588 - LUCILLE: What the hell do I care if it's somebody's niece? - From Westinghouse. 75 00:03:36,671 --> 00:03:38,505 That's the Westinghouse corporate– You were there. 76 00:03:38,588 --> 00:03:40,046 That's the guy's niece. 77 00:03:40,130 --> 00:03:43,421 That picture was taken last summer. 78 00:03:44,921 --> 00:03:46,130 LUCILLE: You're right. 79 00:03:46,213 --> 00:03:48,838 This was taken at the Westinghouse corporate retreat. 80 00:03:48,921 --> 00:03:50,963 - DESI: Yes. - I apologize. 81 00:03:51,046 --> 00:03:54,005 - DESI: Hmm. Say, “Desi, I apologize for doubting you…” -No. 82 00:03:54,088 --> 00:03:58,213 DESI: “…for I see now that this picture was taken not last Wednesday night 83 00:03:58,296 --> 00:04:01,088 “but six months ago at the Westinghouse corporate retreat, 84 00:04:01,171 --> 00:04:03,671 and I will never doubt your love for me again.” 85 00:04:03,755 --> 00:04:05,838 - Say that. - No, and you're doing it again. 86 00:04:05,921 --> 00:04:08,130 You're pronouncing it “Westing-gouse.” 87 00:04:08,213 --> 00:04:09,630 DESI: It is “Westing-gouse.” 88 00:04:09,713 --> 00:04:11,088 LUCILLE: “Westinghouse.” 89 00:04:11,171 --> 00:04:14,088 DESI: Say, “G-H-O-S-T.” 90 00:04:14,171 --> 00:04:15,213 LUCILLE: “Ghost.” 91 00:04:15,296 --> 00:04:17,213 DESI: You don't pronounce an “H” after a “G.” 92 00:04:17,296 --> 00:04:18,796 “Westing-gouse.” 93 00:04:19,963 --> 00:04:22,505 LUCILLE: (breathlessly) Everything in the magazine was made up? 94 00:04:22,588 --> 00:04:24,296 DESI: I haven't read the story in the magazine, 95 00:04:24,380 --> 00:04:26,546 but unless the story's about me playing cards on the boat… 96 00:04:26,630 --> 00:04:28,755 - LUCILLE: (panting) It's not. - Then, yes, it's made up. 97 00:04:28,838 --> 00:04:30,463 Amor, get it through your head. 98 00:04:30,546 --> 00:04:33,838 - You are the only thing I want. - (kissing) 99 00:04:33,921 --> 00:04:35,505 LUCILLE: Well, then you're an idiot. 100 00:04:35,588 --> 00:04:37,296 - DESI: Ah, come here. - (both moaning) 101 00:04:37,380 --> 00:04:38,880 WINCHELL: The House Committee on Un-American Activities is holding 102 00:04:38,963 --> 00:04:40,380 a secret session in California. 103 00:04:40,463 --> 00:04:42,546 The most popular of all television stars 104 00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:46,505 was confronted with her membership in the Communist Party. 105 00:04:47,588 --> 00:04:50,588 - Wait! (panting) - Wait. 106 00:04:50,671 --> 00:04:51,755 Wait. 107 00:04:51,838 --> 00:04:54,005 (panting) 108 00:04:54,088 --> 00:04:55,671 What did he say? 109 00:04:55,755 --> 00:04:58,880 He said, “The most popular of all television stars was…” 110 00:04:58,963 --> 00:05:02,171 “Was confronted with her membership in the Communist Party.” 111 00:05:02,255 --> 00:05:04,380 Yes. 112 00:05:04,463 --> 00:05:06,713 He could have been talking about Imogene Coca. 113 00:05:06,796 --> 00:05:08,130 Fuck you. 114 00:05:08,213 --> 00:05:10,630 He was not talking about Imogene Coca. 115 00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:17,750 {\an1}Improved Subtitle by Sailor420 116 00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:17,750 {\an3}!!! Hope you enjoy the show !!! 117 00:05:20,213 --> 00:05:22,213 (quiet chatter) 118 00:05:27,171 --> 00:05:28,880 VIVIAN: This is nonsense. 119 00:05:28,963 --> 00:05:32,088 It's nonsense, and it will get worse before it gets better. 120 00:05:32,171 --> 00:05:35,963 Little Rusty Hamer, when he signed his contract– 121 00:05:36,046 --> 00:05:38,296 or the guardian, whoever signs the contract for him– 122 00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:40,838 he had to sign a loyalty pledge. 123 00:05:40,921 --> 00:05:42,005 Did anyone know that? 124 00:05:44,171 --> 00:05:45,505 Hmm? 125 00:05:45,588 --> 00:05:47,213 Bill? 126 00:05:49,213 --> 00:05:50,838 Bill? 127 00:05:52,296 --> 00:05:53,421 Is she talking to me? 128 00:05:53,505 --> 00:05:54,713 Yeah. 129 00:05:54,796 --> 00:05:56,005 'Cause she knows I'm here? She can see me? 130 00:05:56,088 --> 00:05:57,421 Yes. 131 00:05:57,505 --> 00:05:59,755 VIVIAN: Did you know Little Rusty had to sign a loyalty pledge? 132 00:05:59,838 --> 00:06:01,338 I don't know who the fuck Little Rusty is. 133 00:06:01,421 --> 00:06:03,255 Rusty Hamer from The Danny Thomas Show. 134 00:06:03,338 --> 00:06:04,671 - That's not his name. - It is his name. 135 00:06:04,755 --> 00:06:06,463 - The littlest kid from Danny's show? - Yes. 136 00:06:06,546 --> 00:06:08,546 Rusty is the character's name, not the actor. 137 00:06:08,630 --> 00:06:11,588 They're both named Rusty. Rusty Williams is played by Rusty Hamer. 138 00:06:11,671 --> 00:06:12,755 And Hamer's a Communist? 139 00:06:12,838 --> 00:06:14,546 He's seven years old. 140 00:06:14,630 --> 00:06:16,796 - And he's interested in politics? - No, imbecile. 141 00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:20,255 I'm saying he's seven years old and they made him sign a loyalty pledge. 142 00:06:20,338 --> 00:06:21,671 Uh-huh? 143 00:06:21,755 --> 00:06:23,546 This is getting out of hand was my point. 144 00:06:23,630 --> 00:06:26,588 Why isn't Danny Thomas's kid named Rusty Thomas? 145 00:06:26,671 --> 00:06:27,921 Are you drunk? 146 00:06:28,005 --> 00:06:30,713 It's 10:00 a.m., Vivian, so, you know, of course. 147 00:06:30,796 --> 00:06:32,421 Bob and Jess and I were up all weekend 148 00:06:32,505 --> 00:06:33,921 working on the script you're about to read, 149 00:06:34,005 --> 00:06:38,046 so on behalf of all of us, I want to say how much we appreciate your respect. 150 00:06:38,130 --> 00:06:40,505 Believe me, you do not want me to read this sober. 151 00:06:40,588 --> 00:06:42,463 I'm starting to get a little tired of your casual insults. 152 00:06:42,546 --> 00:06:45,213 Well, my insults don't feel like putting on a fucking tuxedo for you, kid. 153 00:06:45,296 --> 00:06:48,088 Jess, why don't you tell your supporting cast that we don't work for him either. 154 00:06:48,171 --> 00:06:49,838 You all work for me! 155 00:06:50,921 --> 00:06:54,296 Wh… What you all have to understand is this. 156 00:06:55,588 --> 00:06:57,463 Here's what you have to understand. 157 00:06:58,546 --> 00:06:59,630 We're all tense. 158 00:07:07,213 --> 00:07:09,171 Seriously? That was it? 159 00:07:09,255 --> 00:07:12,088 We're all tense. And the cure for that is just do the show. 160 00:07:12,171 --> 00:07:14,130 Normal production week. 161 00:07:14,213 --> 00:07:15,421 We're gonna need someone to play Lucy and Ricky. 162 00:07:15,505 --> 00:07:16,505 Those are critical roles. 163 00:07:16,588 --> 00:07:18,796 The two of them are in Desi's office 164 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:20,588 meeting with the network and the sponsor right now. 165 00:07:20,671 --> 00:07:22,130 I'm sure there's an explanation. This will all be over by show night. 166 00:07:22,213 --> 00:07:23,963 One way or the other. 167 00:07:24,046 --> 00:07:25,213 Yeah. No. 168 00:07:25,296 --> 00:07:26,630 Let me be clear. 169 00:07:26,713 --> 00:07:28,463 I said, “This will all be over by show night.” 170 00:07:28,546 --> 00:07:30,255 Bill said, “One way or the other.” That's gallows humor. 171 00:07:30,338 --> 00:07:31,421 I said, “Yeah,” but I did not… 172 00:07:31,505 --> 00:07:34,046 - The sooner you stop talking… - Yeah. 173 00:07:34,130 --> 00:07:37,713 I think everyone's acquainted, but let's go around. Joe. 174 00:07:37,796 --> 00:07:38,838 Uh, Joe Strickland, CBS. 175 00:07:38,921 --> 00:07:40,463 Howard Wenke, also CBS. 176 00:07:40,546 --> 00:07:42,588 Roger Otter, Philip Morris. 177 00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:45,130 Irwin Gotlieb, attorney for Desilu. 178 00:07:45,213 --> 00:07:47,796 Sam Stein, attorney for Lucille Ball. 179 00:07:47,880 --> 00:07:50,338 Tip Tribby, VP of Public Relations for Philip Morris. 180 00:07:50,421 --> 00:07:53,963 Tip, if Winchell had it cold, he'd have used her name, 181 00:07:54,046 --> 00:07:56,630 it would have been at the top of the show, not the bottom, 182 00:07:56,713 --> 00:08:00,005 and this morning, we'd be reading about it on the front page of every paper. 183 00:08:00,088 --> 00:08:01,546 - Am I right? - Yes. 184 00:08:01,630 --> 00:08:02,880 They don't have it. 185 00:08:02,963 --> 00:08:05,546 Can you see where CBS might be concerned that there's an it to have? 186 00:08:05,630 --> 00:08:07,921 - Do you see that? - Uh, couldn't follow you. 187 00:08:08,005 --> 00:08:10,713 Lucy, you need to tell me right here and now what the hell is going on. 188 00:08:10,796 --> 00:08:12,380 You don't want to talk to my wife like that, amigo. 189 00:08:12,463 --> 00:08:13,755 Or what, Des, you're gonna beat me up? 190 00:08:13,838 --> 00:08:14,921 Oh, she will. 191 00:08:15,005 --> 00:08:17,171 So we're done with introductions? 192 00:08:17,255 --> 00:08:19,338 I'm not a Communist, I've never been a Communist, 193 00:08:19,421 --> 00:08:21,130 but technically, yeah, I am. 194 00:08:21,213 --> 00:08:22,671 JOE: Jesus Christ. 195 00:08:22,755 --> 00:08:23,921 Do you get what's happening here? 196 00:08:24,005 --> 00:08:25,421 Do you know that this is not funny? 197 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,046 Yes, I do get what's happening, and, yes, I know it's not funny. 198 00:08:28,130 --> 00:08:30,255 - Lucy… - My father died when I was very young. 199 00:08:30,338 --> 00:08:33,088 I was raised by my mother and my grandfather, a man named Fred C. Hunt. 200 00:08:33,171 --> 00:08:35,296 I'd like everyone but Howard to leave the room. 201 00:08:35,380 --> 00:08:37,255 Philip Morris pays for the show. 202 00:08:37,338 --> 00:08:40,838 And they get their money's worth, so give us a minute, would you? 203 00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:43,630 ROGER: (sighs) She's smoking a Chesterfield. 204 00:08:43,713 --> 00:08:46,130 Could she at least smoke one of the seven brands Philip Morris offers? 205 00:08:46,213 --> 00:08:48,213 - Got it. Got it. - (door opens) 206 00:08:48,296 --> 00:08:50,838 - Thank you. - (sighs) 207 00:08:50,921 --> 00:08:52,338 (Desi clears throat) 208 00:08:53,546 --> 00:08:54,588 (door closes) 209 00:08:54,671 --> 00:08:57,755 Fred C. Hunt, my grandfather, was a member of the party. 210 00:08:57,838 --> 00:09:00,213 This was in the early '30s. I was in my early 20s. 211 00:09:00,296 --> 00:09:02,713 He never used the word “Communist.” 212 00:09:02,796 --> 00:09:04,505 But he cared about workers, the working man. 213 00:09:04,588 --> 00:09:09,088 He raised my little brother and me, and I wanted to please him. 214 00:09:09,171 --> 00:09:11,546 So I checked the box. 215 00:09:11,630 --> 00:09:14,088 Back then, it wasn't considered much worse than being a Republican. 216 00:09:14,171 --> 00:09:15,171 DESI: Hmm. 217 00:09:15,255 --> 00:09:16,838 - HOWARD: Have you been to a meeting? - No. 218 00:09:16,921 --> 00:09:17,921 - Never? - No. 219 00:09:18,005 --> 00:09:20,921 - You were at a cocktail party, later you found out that people… -No. 220 00:09:21,005 --> 00:09:22,921 Have you ever subscribed to a publication… 221 00:09:23,005 --> 00:09:26,505 My entire relationship with Communism is, 20 years ago, I checked a box. 222 00:09:26,588 --> 00:09:28,463 Why is this coming out now? 223 00:09:28,546 --> 00:09:31,338 The committee investigated her and cleared her. 224 00:09:31,421 --> 00:09:34,838 But then last week, uh, William Wheeler convened a special session out here, 225 00:09:34,921 --> 00:09:38,755 a private session, called her in again, and that's why we're sitting here. 226 00:09:41,380 --> 00:09:43,005 (sighs) 227 00:09:43,088 --> 00:09:44,505 (Howard exhales sharply) 228 00:09:47,255 --> 00:09:48,296 And nobody's picked it up? 229 00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:50,130 Nobody's picked up the story. 230 00:09:50,213 --> 00:09:52,630 Not a single paper, not a single news network, including your own. 231 00:09:55,088 --> 00:09:56,588 Maybe. 232 00:09:56,671 --> 00:09:58,046 Maybe we're out of this. 233 00:09:58,130 --> 00:09:59,338 We just don't know yet. 234 00:10:00,421 --> 00:10:01,630 When will we? 235 00:10:02,713 --> 00:10:06,005 If you tape a show Friday night, means you still have a show. 236 00:10:10,505 --> 00:10:11,880 Okay. 237 00:10:20,296 --> 00:10:22,588 - You and me, - (door closes) 238 00:10:22,671 --> 00:10:24,796 we've been through worse than this. 239 00:10:24,880 --> 00:10:26,630 (sighs) We have? 240 00:10:26,713 --> 00:10:27,921 No. 241 00:10:29,463 --> 00:10:31,796 That's what I thought. 242 00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:33,255 (Desi clears throat) 243 00:10:33,338 --> 00:10:36,588 Hey. The whole piece was invented out of thin air? 244 00:10:36,671 --> 00:10:40,338 - Huh? - Four pages, 1,500 words? 245 00:10:40,421 --> 00:10:42,005 Are you being funny right now? 246 00:10:42,088 --> 00:10:44,505 That is the second time someone's asked me that this morning. 247 00:10:44,588 --> 00:10:46,713 I'm Lucille Ball. When I'm being funny, you'll know it. 248 00:10:46,796 --> 00:10:49,338 - (chuckles) - They invented the whole thing? 249 00:10:49,421 --> 00:10:51,255 You don't think we got bigger fish to fry? 250 00:10:51,338 --> 00:10:54,046 - They invented the whole thing? - Yes, they invented the whole thing. 251 00:10:54,130 --> 00:10:55,380 I was on the boat playing cards. 252 00:10:55,463 --> 00:10:57,880 They invented the whole thing, and I'm angry at them. 253 00:10:57,963 --> 00:10:59,546 And I'll do something about it, but right now… 254 00:10:59,630 --> 00:11:00,630 - Got it. - Hmm. 255 00:11:00,713 --> 00:11:01,963 Priorities. 256 00:11:02,046 --> 00:11:03,046 You're right. 257 00:11:03,130 --> 00:11:05,213 Say that again. “Desi, you're right.” 258 00:11:05,296 --> 00:11:06,880 No. 259 00:11:08,505 --> 00:11:11,338 Everything's gonna be fine. 260 00:11:11,421 --> 00:11:13,505 Nothing's gonna happen to you. I won't allow it. 261 00:11:13,588 --> 00:11:16,296 I just won't. 262 00:11:16,380 --> 00:11:17,588 Hmm? 263 00:11:30,255 --> 00:11:32,005 - You've never done that before. - I know. 264 00:11:32,088 --> 00:11:34,296 I've seen other people do it in movies I've been in. 265 00:11:34,380 --> 00:11:35,588 (Desi chuckles) 266 00:11:38,921 --> 00:11:41,588 For the love of God, old man, this isn't hard. 267 00:11:41,671 --> 00:11:44,630 Rusty Hamer plays Rusty Williams on The Danny Thomas Show. 268 00:11:44,713 --> 00:11:47,505 He's in second grade, and they made him sign a loyalty oath 269 00:11:47,588 --> 00:11:49,880 when he signed his contract, which I think is ugly. 270 00:11:49,963 --> 00:11:52,713 I don't know why this is tripping you up. It wasn't confusing. 271 00:11:52,796 --> 00:11:54,796 There's no such thing as The Danny Thomas Show. 272 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:57,588 It's called Make Room for Daddy. Don't tell me comedy. 273 00:11:57,671 --> 00:11:59,671 And if Little Rusty is a Communist, 274 00:11:59,755 --> 00:12:01,880 then I'm gonna beat the shit out of a seven-year-old kid. 275 00:12:01,963 --> 00:12:03,713 - I have no problem with that. - I'm done. 276 00:12:03,796 --> 00:12:05,296 That, right there, 277 00:12:05,380 --> 00:12:07,755 was funnier than anything you've written so far this year. 278 00:12:07,838 --> 00:12:09,046 (chuckles) 279 00:12:09,130 --> 00:12:10,213 That's not… 280 00:12:10,296 --> 00:12:12,796 - I've written plenty of funny… - No. 281 00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:14,255 (doors opening) 282 00:12:16,130 --> 00:12:18,130 ♫ ♫ 283 00:12:22,421 --> 00:12:23,546 Good morning! 284 00:12:25,630 --> 00:12:29,130 Mm. Don Glass is directing this week? 285 00:12:29,213 --> 00:12:31,088 - We'll be fine. - (sighs) 286 00:12:31,171 --> 00:12:32,338 You're wondering what's going on. 287 00:12:32,421 --> 00:12:35,421 No matter what's going on, we all support you a thousand percent. 288 00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:38,005 I'd like to find out what's going on before I make that commitment. 289 00:12:38,088 --> 00:12:42,213 A long time ago, Lucy accidentally checked the wrong box on her voter registration. 290 00:12:42,296 --> 00:12:44,505 That's the first act of a new episode right there. 291 00:12:44,588 --> 00:12:46,921 - Yeah, “Lucy Gets Blacklisted.” - That's not a joke, Bob. 292 00:12:47,005 --> 00:12:49,005 You made the joke. I just put the button… 293 00:12:49,088 --> 00:12:50,921 Last week, she testified in a closed session. 294 00:12:51,005 --> 00:12:52,755 - She was cleared. - Okay. 295 00:12:52,838 --> 00:12:54,046 Yeah? She was cleared. 296 00:12:54,130 --> 00:12:56,713 So I don't know where Winchell got his information, but it was wrong. 297 00:12:56,796 --> 00:12:59,088 As you can see, it was not picked up by any newspaper. 298 00:12:59,171 --> 00:13:00,421 So let's do our show. 299 00:13:00,505 --> 00:13:02,338 Jess, it's your stage. 300 00:13:02,421 --> 00:13:03,588 (clears throat) 301 00:13:03,671 --> 00:13:05,213 I Love Lucy , episode 204. 302 00:13:05,296 --> 00:13:07,463 Season two, episode four. 303 00:13:07,546 --> 00:13:09,213 “Ethel and Fred Fight.” 304 00:13:09,296 --> 00:13:11,921 Teleplay by Bob Carroll, Madelyn Pugh and myself. 305 00:13:12,005 --> 00:13:13,505 Took three of you to write this one? 306 00:13:13,588 --> 00:13:16,505 Okay, come on. And directing this week, Donald Glass is back with us. 307 00:13:16,588 --> 00:13:18,880 - Let's give him a hand. (applause) - Hey, thanks. It's good to be back. 308 00:13:22,296 --> 00:13:25,296 JESS: Act one, “Interior, the Ricardo's living room, night.” 309 00:13:25,380 --> 00:13:27,213 Excuse me. Donald. 310 00:13:27,296 --> 00:13:29,171 - Y-Yes? - Good morning. I'm Lucille Ball. 311 00:13:29,255 --> 00:13:30,880 I sure know that, Lucy. 312 00:13:30,963 --> 00:13:33,213 I wanted to make sure because you haven't been here in a while. 313 00:13:33,296 --> 00:13:34,921 Is it because you've been going through puberty? 314 00:13:35,005 --> 00:13:38,255 I look young, yes, but I went through it a long time ago, 315 00:13:38,338 --> 00:13:41,088 and I haven't been here because I've been directing at Danny Thomas. 316 00:13:41,171 --> 00:13:42,838 WILLIAM: With the Communist kid? 317 00:13:42,921 --> 00:13:44,088 - Fuck off. - Jesus Christ. 318 00:13:44,171 --> 00:13:45,546 LUCILLE: You don't have to fuck off, 319 00:13:45,630 --> 00:13:49,171 but you do need to know that Danny does jokes– few people do it better. 320 00:13:49,255 --> 00:13:50,963 I do physical comedy. 321 00:13:51,046 --> 00:13:54,546 - I've seen every episode of the show. - So have 60 million other people. 322 00:13:54,630 --> 00:13:56,671 Are none of them professional television directors? 323 00:13:56,755 --> 00:13:57,671 DESI: (chuckles) She's kidding. 324 00:13:57,755 --> 00:13:58,838 - I can tell. - Ah. 325 00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:01,046 LUCILLE: I'm hazing you a little, Donald. 326 00:14:01,130 --> 00:14:03,546 It's just my way of saying I have no confidence in you at all. 327 00:14:03,630 --> 00:14:05,838 (laughs) All right, all right, all right. 328 00:14:05,921 --> 00:14:08,588 We haven't gotten off to a great start this morning, I think. 329 00:14:08,671 --> 00:14:10,796 And I have no idea what the fuck you were talking about, Bill. 330 00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:12,880 Ah, Des, I'm begging you, don't ask. 331 00:14:12,963 --> 00:14:14,088 All right, no problem. 332 00:14:14,171 --> 00:14:17,338 I just wanted to say that this show is made by Desilu Productions, 333 00:14:17,421 --> 00:14:19,963 whose president is speaking to you right now. 334 00:14:20,046 --> 00:14:24,213 And for the next 30 minutes, I don't want to hear a word that is not in this script. 335 00:14:24,296 --> 00:14:25,713 - It's your stage. - JESS: Thank you. 336 00:14:26,796 --> 00:14:29,630 “Lucy's putting the finishing touches on a fancy dinner table– 337 00:14:29,713 --> 00:14:31,463 good china, silver, et cetera.” 338 00:14:31,546 --> 00:14:34,088 Uh, the table is set for four but there are only three chairs. 339 00:14:34,171 --> 00:14:36,128 I-I should've put that in the, in the stage direction. 340 00:14:36,152 --> 00:14:36,796 JESS: Okay. 341 00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:38,630 Well, technically, it's two chairs and a piano bench. 342 00:14:38,713 --> 00:14:39,880 For a total of? 343 00:14:39,963 --> 00:14:41,296 Three chairs. 344 00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:43,338 JESS: “Lucy's putting the finishing touches on a fancy dinner table– 345 00:14:43,421 --> 00:14:44,880 good china, silver, et cetera.” 346 00:14:44,963 --> 00:14:47,796 Table's set for four but there's only three chairs. 347 00:14:47,880 --> 00:14:48,963 “After a moment, 348 00:14:49,046 --> 00:14:50,380 “the door opens and Ricky enters. 349 00:14:50,463 --> 00:14:52,755 “Lucy doesn't hear him. 350 00:14:52,838 --> 00:14:53,796 “Ricky tiptoes in back of her. 351 00:14:53,880 --> 00:14:55,796 - Ricky puts his…” - Why not? 352 00:14:56,755 --> 00:14:57,755 Sorry? 353 00:14:59,088 --> 00:15:00,380 Why doesn't Lucy hear him? 354 00:15:00,463 --> 00:15:01,713 Well, he's about to do that thing where you cover someone's eyes 355 00:15:01,796 --> 00:15:02,796 and you say, “Guess who.” 356 00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:04,088 I understand it's a setup. 357 00:15:04,171 --> 00:15:05,171 I understand 358 00:15:05,255 --> 00:15:06,880 why we need Lucy to not hear him. 359 00:15:06,963 --> 00:15:11,005 I just don't understand why, in an apartment this size, Lucy doesn't hear– 360 00:15:11,088 --> 00:15:15,463 or, for that matter, see– the front door open when she's standing 12 feet from it. 361 00:15:18,546 --> 00:15:19,796 We'll work on that. 362 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:20,921 Thanks. 363 00:15:21,005 --> 00:15:22,838 “Ricky tiptoes in back of her and reaches around 364 00:15:22,921 --> 00:15:24,671 and covers her eyes with his hands.” 365 00:15:24,755 --> 00:15:25,755 RICKY: Guess who it is. 366 00:15:25,838 --> 00:15:27,630 LUCY: Bill? Pat? 367 00:15:27,713 --> 00:15:29,630 - Sam? - No. 368 00:15:29,713 --> 00:15:31,463 - Ralph? - JESS: “Ricky reacts to this.” 369 00:15:31,546 --> 00:15:32,963 No, it's me. 370 00:15:33,046 --> 00:15:35,755 Oh, yes, of course. 371 00:15:35,838 --> 00:15:37,171 Oh, hang on. 372 00:15:37,255 --> 00:15:40,296 Are we supposed to believe that Ricky believes that Lucy 373 00:15:40,380 --> 00:15:42,171 - really doesn't know it's him? - Want to do this now? 374 00:15:42,255 --> 00:15:45,546 That Ricky believes that Lucy is not only unfamiliar with his voice– 375 00:15:45,630 --> 00:15:48,130 which, let's not forget, has a Cuban accent– 376 00:15:48,213 --> 00:15:50,671 but that he really believes there are at least seven other men 377 00:15:50,755 --> 00:15:53,005 who routinely walk into their apartment? 378 00:15:53,088 --> 00:15:55,005 DESI: (chuckles) She has a pretty good point. 379 00:15:55,088 --> 00:15:58,046 - She has four or five pretty good points. - JESS: All right. 380 00:15:58,130 --> 00:16:00,130 W-We'll write a better joke or Ricky will know that Lucy's joking. 381 00:16:00,213 --> 00:16:01,546 - Ah. - BOB: We can change the names. 382 00:16:01,630 --> 00:16:04,213 - Pedro, Pablo, Jose. - What? 383 00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:05,380 Because they're Spanish names. 384 00:16:05,463 --> 00:16:07,171 I mean Latin names. 385 00:16:07,255 --> 00:16:08,671 They're Cuban names. 386 00:16:08,755 --> 00:16:10,421 (sighs) Thanks for clearing that up, professor. 387 00:16:10,505 --> 00:16:12,380 - I'm just, you know… - JESS: Okay, “Ricky takes his hands away 388 00:16:12,463 --> 00:16:13,630 and turns her around.” 389 00:16:13,713 --> 00:16:15,921 - No, it's me. - Oh, yes, of course. 390 00:16:16,005 --> 00:16:17,838 - Uh, uh… - JESS: “She snaps her fingers 391 00:16:17,921 --> 00:16:19,270 and pretends she can't remember his name.” 392 00:16:19,294 --> 00:16:20,046 (fingers snapping) 393 00:16:20,130 --> 00:16:22,088 - Very funny. - “Ricky kisses her 394 00:16:22,171 --> 00:16:23,296 and then notices the table setup.” 395 00:16:23,380 --> 00:16:24,588 Hey, company for dinner? 396 00:16:24,671 --> 00:16:25,963 - Uh-huh. - Who is it? 397 00:16:26,046 --> 00:16:27,588 JESS: “Lucy elaborately ignores him.” 398 00:16:27,671 --> 00:16:30,171 LUCY: How do you like the new water glasses, Ricky? 399 00:16:30,255 --> 00:16:31,380 RICKY: Who's coming for dinner, Lucy? 400 00:16:31,463 --> 00:16:33,880 Doesn't the table look beautiful tonight? 401 00:16:33,963 --> 00:16:35,088 Lucy, who is it? 402 00:16:35,171 --> 00:16:36,713 Some people. 403 00:16:36,796 --> 00:16:37,963 (audience laughter) 404 00:16:38,046 --> 00:16:39,546 RICKY: (annoyed) Lucy… 405 00:16:40,963 --> 00:16:44,338 Whom is coming here for dinner tonight? 406 00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:47,088 Whom? You mean besides “meem” and “youm”? 407 00:16:47,171 --> 00:16:49,005 (laughter) 408 00:16:49,088 --> 00:16:50,713 RICKY: Never mind that. What are their names? 409 00:16:50,796 --> 00:16:53,755 - Fred and Ethel Mertz. - Wait a minute. 410 00:16:53,838 --> 00:16:56,755 I thought you said Fred and Ethel had a big fight and they were mad at each other. 411 00:16:56,838 --> 00:16:57,921 - They are. - (audience laughter) 412 00:16:58,005 --> 00:16:59,713 RICKY: I thought you said they weren't speaking to each other. 413 00:16:59,796 --> 00:17:01,255 - They aren't. - (audience laughter) 414 00:17:01,338 --> 00:17:03,630 - And that he was staying at the Y. - He is. 415 00:17:03,713 --> 00:17:06,088 - And that she won't let him in the house. - She won't. 416 00:17:06,171 --> 00:17:11,046 Well, if they are and they aren't and he is and she won't, how come? 417 00:17:11,130 --> 00:17:12,713 Well… 418 00:17:12,796 --> 00:17:15,546 Lucy Esmeralda McGillicuddy Ricardo. 419 00:17:15,630 --> 00:17:16,880 Oh… 420 00:17:16,963 --> 00:17:19,463 That's nice, but is the rhythm getting old too early? 421 00:17:19,546 --> 00:17:20,755 We'll work on that. 422 00:17:20,838 --> 00:17:23,630 'Cause we want to live up to the quality of the writing you were used to at RKO. 423 00:17:27,588 --> 00:17:29,463 - That was gutsy. - That was… 424 00:17:29,546 --> 00:17:33,963 (chuckles) It was a joke about the writing at RKO and not… 425 00:17:34,046 --> 00:17:35,713 Yeah? 426 00:17:35,796 --> 00:17:37,755 Obviously not an insult aimed at Lucy. 427 00:17:37,838 --> 00:17:39,713 ♫ ♫ 428 00:17:39,796 --> 00:17:42,796 Looking back, it may have been an insult aimed at Lucy. 429 00:17:42,880 --> 00:17:44,755 Which was very unusual. 430 00:17:44,838 --> 00:17:46,130 Lucy and I were close. 431 00:17:48,005 --> 00:17:49,713 - (laughs) - JESS: Okay, let's take it from… 432 00:17:49,796 --> 00:17:51,463 OLDER MADELYN: Look, she was always tough on the writing, 433 00:17:51,546 --> 00:17:53,338 she pressed down hard on each beat, 434 00:17:53,421 --> 00:17:55,796 but that week… 435 00:17:55,880 --> 00:18:00,088 it was like her life depended on whether a joke was a “B” or “B”-plus. 436 00:18:00,171 --> 00:18:01,880 JESS: “She tries to make her way past him on her way to the kitchen, 437 00:18:01,963 --> 00:18:04,130 but he holds out his hand and blocks the way.” 438 00:18:04,213 --> 00:18:05,463 OLDER BOB: There was a Broadway show 439 00:18:05,546 --> 00:18:07,630 called Too Many Girls. 440 00:18:07,713 --> 00:18:08,838 It was terrible. 441 00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:11,796 One of the stars of Too Many Girls was Desi. 442 00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:14,046 Too Many Girls. 443 00:18:14,130 --> 00:18:18,630 RKO decided to make a very bad Broadway show into– 444 00:18:18,713 --> 00:18:22,046 and I still can't believe it– an even worse movie. 445 00:18:22,130 --> 00:18:25,546 They kept Desi in the cast, but the second female lead was replaced 446 00:18:25,630 --> 00:18:28,338 by the queen of the “B” movies, Lucille Ball. 447 00:18:28,421 --> 00:18:30,171 A couple of days before shooting started, 448 00:18:30,255 --> 00:18:34,796 Desi was on a soundstage working with a piano and a drum and Ann Miller. 449 00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:37,171 Here's what you have to understand. 450 00:18:37,255 --> 00:18:42,046 A more handsome, charming man than Desi you've never met. 451 00:18:42,130 --> 00:18:45,713 Standing off, away from the pack of chorus girls, is Lucy, 452 00:18:45,796 --> 00:18:49,213 who was unrecognizable because she was still in the middle of shooting 453 00:18:49,296 --> 00:18:51,796 Dance, Girl, Dance, playing a burlesque girl 454 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:53,546 who'd just been beaten up by her pimp. 455 00:18:53,630 --> 00:18:56,338 So she was… unrecognizable. 456 00:18:56,421 --> 00:18:58,088 That's how they met. 457 00:18:58,171 --> 00:19:00,755 DESI: ♫ She could shake the maracas ♫ 458 00:19:00,838 --> 00:19:02,380 ♫ piano and bongo drum playing “She Could Shake the Maracas" ♫ 459 00:19:02,463 --> 00:19:05,046 - ♫ He could play the guitar ♫ - (women giggling) 460 00:19:05,130 --> 00:19:06,880 ♫ But he lived in Havana ♫ 461 00:19:06,963 --> 00:19:09,755 ♫ And she down in Rio del Mar ♫ 462 00:19:09,838 --> 00:19:11,755 (giggling continues) 463 00:19:11,838 --> 00:19:15,171 - ♫ And she shook the maracas ♫ - (rhythmic shaking) 464 00:19:15,255 --> 00:19:18,755 ♫ In a Portuguese bar ♫ 465 00:19:18,838 --> 00:19:20,630 ♫ While he strummed in Havana ♫ 466 00:19:20,713 --> 00:19:23,421 ♫ The distance between them was far ♫ 467 00:19:25,505 --> 00:19:28,296 ♫ But by and by ♫ 468 00:19:29,546 --> 00:19:32,546 ♫ He got a job with a band in Harlem ♫ 469 00:19:32,630 --> 00:19:36,546 ♫ She got a job with a band in Harlem ♫ 470 00:19:36,630 --> 00:19:39,588 ♫ Ay, ay, ay ♫ 471 00:19:39,671 --> 00:19:41,380 (rhythmic tapping) 472 00:19:45,505 --> 00:19:48,421 ♫ He said, “I'm the attraction” ♫ 473 00:19:48,505 --> 00:19:52,213 ♫ She said, “I am the star” ♫ 474 00:19:52,296 --> 00:19:54,213 ♫ But they finally married ♫ 475 00:19:54,296 --> 00:19:58,338 ♫ And now see how happy they are ♫ (chuckles) 476 00:19:58,421 --> 00:20:01,588 ♫ So shake your maracas ♫ 477 00:20:01,671 --> 00:20:04,755 ♫ And play your guitar. ♫ 478 00:20:04,838 --> 00:20:06,588 - (cheering, laughing) - (song ends) 479 00:20:06,671 --> 00:20:07,880 Thank you. 480 00:20:07,963 --> 00:20:09,421 - Mr. Arnaz? - Yes. 481 00:20:09,505 --> 00:20:13,380 I'm Desiderio Alberto Arnaz y de Acha III, but just my mother calls me that. 482 00:20:13,463 --> 00:20:14,838 - Desi. Desi. - I'm Angie. 483 00:20:14,921 --> 00:20:17,088 I'm in the chorus and I wanted to say I'm looking forward to working with you. 484 00:20:17,171 --> 00:20:18,963 - I'm looking forward, too, Angie. - (laughs) 485 00:20:19,046 --> 00:20:20,755 - Patty. - Patty. 486 00:20:20,838 --> 00:20:22,755 - Uh, short for Patricia? - Yes. 487 00:20:22,838 --> 00:20:25,588 - DESI: Also in the chorus? - Mm-hmm. Dancing chorus. 488 00:20:25,671 --> 00:20:26,347 Oh. 489 00:20:26,371 --> 00:20:28,421 LUCILLE: “Do you remember the first time we met? 490 00:20:31,088 --> 00:20:34,838 You were rudely attentive, but now you're obnoxiously indifferent.” 491 00:20:34,921 --> 00:20:36,630 What? 492 00:20:36,713 --> 00:20:39,630 It's a line from our movie, dumb-dumb. 493 00:20:39,713 --> 00:20:41,588 Do we know each other? 494 00:20:41,671 --> 00:20:43,296 (chuckles) 495 00:20:43,380 --> 00:20:45,796 No. 496 00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:47,255 WOMAN: Desi? 497 00:20:47,338 --> 00:20:49,463 - I'm Daisy. - (guitar playing gentle lullaby) 498 00:20:49,546 --> 00:20:52,671 DESI: ♫ A la nanita nana ♫ 499 00:20:52,755 --> 00:20:57,088 ♫ Nanita ella, nanita ella ♫ 500 00:20:57,171 --> 00:20:59,546 ♫ Mi niña tiene sueño ♫ 501 00:20:59,630 --> 00:21:03,421 ♫ Bendito sea, bendito sea ♫ 502 00:21:03,505 --> 00:21:10,213 ♫ Calla mientras la cuna se balancea ♫ 503 00:21:10,296 --> 00:21:17,755 ♫ A la nanita nana, nanita ella ♫ 504 00:21:18,755 --> 00:21:21,088 ♫ A la nanita nana ♫ 505 00:21:21,171 --> 00:21:25,171 ♫ Nanita ella, nanita ella ♫ 506 00:21:25,255 --> 00:21:27,713 ♫ Mi niña tiene sueño ♫ 507 00:21:27,796 --> 00:21:31,213 ♫ Bendito sea, bendito sea ♫ 508 00:21:32,296 --> 00:21:33,755 - ♫ Mi… ♫ - (music stops) 509 00:21:34,838 --> 00:21:37,005 “Do you remember the first time we met?” 510 00:21:37,088 --> 00:21:40,338 If we'd met, I'd remember. 511 00:21:40,421 --> 00:21:42,255 “You were rudely attentive, but now you're obnoxiously…” 512 00:21:42,338 --> 00:21:44,046 Wait. 513 00:21:44,130 --> 00:21:46,463 - That was you? - ”…indifferent.” 514 00:21:46,546 --> 00:21:48,255 That was me, yeah. 515 00:21:48,338 --> 00:21:50,588 - This studio has talented makeup artists. - “I'm Angie. 516 00:21:50,671 --> 00:21:51,880 “I'm in the chorus. 517 00:21:51,963 --> 00:21:53,921 I just want to say, when I drink, I take off my clothes.” 518 00:21:54,005 --> 00:21:56,713 - (laughs) - I'm so curious, I have to ask. 519 00:21:56,796 --> 00:21:59,213 How did you know Patty was short for Patricia? 520 00:21:59,296 --> 00:22:01,255 - My name is Desiderio Alberto Arnaz… - Ah. 521 00:22:01,338 --> 00:22:03,213 I don't have that kind of time. 522 00:22:05,130 --> 00:22:06,546 And you're Lucille Ball. 523 00:22:08,463 --> 00:22:10,671 Use a line on me you've never road-tested on anyone. 524 00:22:10,755 --> 00:22:11,755 I dare you. 525 00:22:13,338 --> 00:22:16,130 (strumming guitar) 526 00:22:16,213 --> 00:22:17,963 Would you like to learn how to rumba? 527 00:22:19,255 --> 00:22:21,671 All right. Nice. 528 00:22:21,755 --> 00:22:23,296 And, yes, I would. 529 00:22:23,380 --> 00:22:26,380 - Ah. -But there's absolutely no chance you haven't used that before. 530 00:22:26,463 --> 00:22:28,630 ♫ band playing “Rumba Internacional" ♫ 531 00:22:28,713 --> 00:22:30,713 - (lively chatter, laughter) - (music continues) 532 00:22:49,963 --> 00:22:51,255 Mm-hmm. 533 00:22:54,838 --> 00:22:55,378 (laughs) 534 00:22:55,402 --> 00:22:57,046 I want you to know I'm not trying to be forward. 535 00:22:57,130 --> 00:22:59,046 I'm showing you this because it'll come in handy 536 00:22:59,130 --> 00:23:01,505 for your rumba number in the movie. 537 00:23:01,588 --> 00:23:04,005 I don't have a rumba number in the movie. 538 00:23:04,088 --> 00:23:06,046 - No rumba? - No. 539 00:23:06,130 --> 00:23:09,713 Oh, that's a sign of a poorly written screenplay. 540 00:23:09,796 --> 00:23:11,296 (chuckles) 541 00:23:11,380 --> 00:23:13,588 Well, we should dance to something else. 542 00:23:13,671 --> 00:23:15,505 Sure. 543 00:23:15,588 --> 00:23:17,588 (band playing slow jazz music) 544 00:23:22,796 --> 00:23:25,005 Why did you come to Hollywood? 545 00:23:27,463 --> 00:23:29,421 I got kicked out of New York. 546 00:23:29,505 --> 00:23:32,338 - Seriously. - I mean it. 547 00:23:32,421 --> 00:23:35,630 I got kicked out of acting school for not being good enough. 548 00:23:36,713 --> 00:23:39,338 - Get out of here. - I will not. 549 00:23:41,338 --> 00:23:46,796 I got some modeling work, I was hired and fired as a Ziegfeld Girl 550 00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:50,546 but hired as a Goldwyn Girl, and that's what took me out here. 551 00:23:50,630 --> 00:23:52,046 Hmm. 552 00:23:52,130 --> 00:23:53,796 Why did you come to Hollywood? 553 00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:56,088 The Bolsheviks burned my house down. 554 00:23:58,713 --> 00:24:01,505 - So a different reason. - Mm, yeah. 555 00:24:03,088 --> 00:24:05,088 - ♫ Lucille ♫ - (playing gentle music) 556 00:24:06,505 --> 00:24:10,713 ♫ There's not much that rhymes with “Lucille” ♫ 557 00:24:10,796 --> 00:24:12,338 ♫ Mm… ♫ 558 00:24:12,421 --> 00:24:14,880 ♫ Bastille ♫ 559 00:24:14,963 --> 00:24:18,963 ♫ But who'd write a song about that? ♫ 560 00:24:19,963 --> 00:24:21,963 (footsteps approaching) 561 00:24:22,046 --> 00:24:24,046 (plays gentle guitar riff) 562 00:24:26,088 --> 00:24:28,296 I borrowed part of your tuxedo. 563 00:24:36,338 --> 00:24:37,380 (Desi clears throat) 564 00:24:37,463 --> 00:24:40,755 It comes with pants, but, uh, I'm wearing them. 565 00:24:40,838 --> 00:24:42,671 Not for long, pal. 566 00:24:45,838 --> 00:24:47,421 So… 567 00:24:47,505 --> 00:24:48,880 Yes? 568 00:24:48,963 --> 00:24:50,421 Can I call you Lucy? 569 00:24:50,505 --> 00:24:52,921 I think we should keep this professional, don't you? 570 00:24:54,296 --> 00:24:55,963 - I was kidding. - So was I. 571 00:24:56,046 --> 00:24:58,546 Mm. Nice dry delivery. 572 00:24:58,630 --> 00:25:02,088 Uh, what's your, mm… 573 00:25:02,171 --> 00:25:03,171 ambition? 574 00:25:03,255 --> 00:25:05,213 My ambition? For tonight? 575 00:25:05,296 --> 00:25:06,838 I wasn't making myself clear? 576 00:25:06,921 --> 00:25:09,088 No, I don't mean ambition. 577 00:25:09,171 --> 00:25:10,546 Ay, what do I mean? 578 00:25:10,630 --> 00:25:12,380 Uh… 579 00:25:12,463 --> 00:25:14,255 - Goals? - No. 580 00:25:14,338 --> 00:25:16,255 Mm… future. 581 00:25:16,338 --> 00:25:18,505 - Dreams. - What are my future dreams? 582 00:25:18,588 --> 00:25:20,296 I should've stuck with ambition. 583 00:25:20,380 --> 00:25:21,588 Are you interviewing me? 584 00:25:21,671 --> 00:25:22,880 Yes. 585 00:25:22,963 --> 00:25:24,588 Okay. 586 00:25:24,671 --> 00:25:26,046 I live in a small house. 587 00:25:26,130 --> 00:25:27,630 And your ambition is to live in a bigger house. 588 00:25:27,713 --> 00:25:29,296 My ambition is to live in a home. 589 00:25:29,380 --> 00:25:31,380 Like for old folks? 590 00:25:31,463 --> 00:25:34,463 Not a home, not an institution. 591 00:25:34,546 --> 00:25:36,296 - A home. - Ah. 592 00:25:36,380 --> 00:25:38,630 With a family and dinnertime. 593 00:25:38,713 --> 00:25:41,213 Can I ask an impertinent question? 594 00:25:41,296 --> 00:25:43,755 You gonna ask me why I'm not married? 595 00:25:43,838 --> 00:25:46,171 No, I was going to ask you why you're not a movie star. 596 00:25:46,255 --> 00:25:50,588 Why are you playing the second female lead in Too Many Girls? 597 00:25:50,671 --> 00:25:52,380 I'm a contract player at RKO. 598 00:25:52,463 --> 00:25:54,338 I play the roles I'm told to play. 599 00:25:54,421 --> 00:25:56,255 My career's gone as far as it's gonna go. 600 00:25:56,338 --> 00:25:58,505 It's hit cruising altitude. 601 00:25:58,588 --> 00:26:00,171 I'm at peace with that. 602 00:26:00,255 --> 00:26:02,921 So I'd like to be at peace. 603 00:26:04,088 --> 00:26:05,255 I want a home. 604 00:26:05,338 --> 00:26:09,171 You have a lot more talent than the roles you play have allowed you to exhibit. 605 00:26:09,255 --> 00:26:11,005 Now, how would you know I have talent? 606 00:26:11,088 --> 00:26:12,963 Because I have talent. 607 00:26:13,046 --> 00:26:16,171 You could be a serious actor. You should be a star by now. 608 00:26:17,380 --> 00:26:19,421 - But… - But what? 609 00:26:19,505 --> 00:26:22,005 There is also something about your physicality. You are, you are… 610 00:26:22,088 --> 00:26:23,213 Half naked? 611 00:26:23,296 --> 00:26:25,755 Uh, sure. 612 00:26:25,838 --> 00:26:28,380 - But… - But? 613 00:26:28,463 --> 00:26:32,130 You, uh… There isn't an English word. 614 00:26:32,213 --> 00:26:35,880 Tú estás… dotada cineticamente. 615 00:26:35,963 --> 00:26:37,046 What does that mean? 616 00:26:37,130 --> 00:26:40,921 It means you're kinetically gifted. 617 00:26:42,421 --> 00:26:43,921 No one's noticed that? 618 00:26:44,005 --> 00:26:46,213 ♫ ♫ 619 00:26:52,088 --> 00:26:54,088 (panting) 620 00:27:07,005 --> 00:27:09,005 ♫ ♫ 621 00:27:19,338 --> 00:27:21,088 Hi. Sorry. 622 00:27:21,171 --> 00:27:23,255 I need to use the phone to call my fiancé. 623 00:27:23,338 --> 00:27:24,546 Sure. 624 00:27:25,921 --> 00:27:27,296 Wait, what? 625 00:27:27,380 --> 00:27:29,046 It'll just take a second. 626 00:27:29,130 --> 00:27:31,671 Your fiancé? 627 00:27:31,755 --> 00:27:33,255 Outside line please. 628 00:27:33,338 --> 00:27:35,963 - I mean, not that I haven't… - (dialing) 629 00:27:36,046 --> 00:27:39,171 It's just that I got the sense that we… 630 00:27:39,255 --> 00:27:40,505 - One sec. - Yeah. 631 00:27:40,588 --> 00:27:41,713 (dialing) 632 00:27:41,796 --> 00:27:44,005 Last night, I felt it was… 633 00:27:44,088 --> 00:27:46,421 It's me. Hey. 634 00:27:46,505 --> 00:27:48,046 You don't love me, and I don't love you, 635 00:27:48,130 --> 00:27:49,546 and you cheat on me every chance you can get, 636 00:27:49,630 --> 00:27:52,630 and I pretend I'm stupid, so I'm moving out. 637 00:27:52,713 --> 00:27:55,880 I'll send someone to pick up my clothes, okay? 638 00:27:55,963 --> 00:27:58,796 Love you. But, you know, not really. 639 00:28:00,171 --> 00:28:03,255 I interrupted you. What were you saying? 640 00:28:03,338 --> 00:28:05,296 (laughs) 641 00:28:05,380 --> 00:28:07,380 JESS: And we fade to black. End of show. 642 00:28:08,671 --> 00:28:09,671 Thank you. 643 00:28:09,755 --> 00:28:11,046 Notes upstairs. 644 00:28:11,130 --> 00:28:12,985 ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: Back onstage in an hour. 645 00:28:13,009 --> 00:28:14,213 (soundstage bell rings) 646 00:28:14,296 --> 00:28:15,338 - All right. - All right. 647 00:28:15,421 --> 00:28:16,546 - We'll see ya. - Yeah. 648 00:28:16,630 --> 00:28:18,338 - Okay, honey. See you in a bit. - Mm-hmm. 649 00:28:18,421 --> 00:28:20,296 (indistinct chatter) 650 00:28:24,463 --> 00:28:26,255 - (door closes) - (chatter quiets) 651 00:28:34,796 --> 00:28:36,796 (footsteps receding) 652 00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:39,296 (Desi exhales heavily) 653 00:28:42,671 --> 00:28:43,671 It's madness. 654 00:28:43,755 --> 00:28:44,963 Yeah? 655 00:28:45,046 --> 00:28:47,505 I thought you'd be the first one to refuse to work with her. 656 00:28:47,588 --> 00:28:49,005 You mean that? 657 00:28:49,088 --> 00:28:51,130 Mm. 658 00:28:51,213 --> 00:28:52,755 You're not fond of Communists. 659 00:28:55,213 --> 00:28:57,255 I'm less fond of the committee. 660 00:28:57,338 --> 00:28:58,755 Ah. 661 00:29:00,963 --> 00:29:03,421 (grunts, sighs) 662 00:29:03,505 --> 00:29:05,505 ♫ ♫ 663 00:29:07,588 --> 00:29:08,588 Des. 664 00:29:08,671 --> 00:29:10,838 Hmm? 665 00:29:10,921 --> 00:29:13,380 When the soldiers came 666 00:29:13,463 --> 00:29:15,088 for your family… 667 00:29:17,213 --> 00:29:18,671 …how scary was it? 668 00:29:22,713 --> 00:29:27,213 You're giving me that look that says, “I don't get scared of nothing.” 669 00:29:28,963 --> 00:29:30,963 Uh… (sighs) 670 00:29:31,046 --> 00:29:33,338 They killed all the animals. 671 00:29:33,421 --> 00:29:34,838 Uh, not-not for food. 672 00:29:34,921 --> 00:29:37,755 They just killed all the animals. 673 00:29:38,796 --> 00:29:40,296 I still don't know why they did that. 674 00:29:40,380 --> 00:29:41,505 Uh… 675 00:29:46,505 --> 00:29:49,171 It's six to five and pick 'em 676 00:29:49,255 --> 00:29:52,546 we've already done the last episode of this show. 677 00:29:52,630 --> 00:29:55,171 This show, everyone who works here, 678 00:29:55,255 --> 00:29:58,338 Desilu, Lucy's whole career– mine, too– 679 00:29:58,421 --> 00:30:01,505 it may have ended last night and we just don't know it yet. 680 00:30:04,421 --> 00:30:06,296 Are you out of your mind? 681 00:30:06,380 --> 00:30:08,130 I get plenty scared. 682 00:30:12,171 --> 00:30:14,171 (footsteps receding) 683 00:30:18,255 --> 00:30:19,880 Fucking madness. 684 00:30:28,713 --> 00:30:30,713 ♫ ♫ 685 00:30:39,796 --> 00:30:40,921 Lucy? 686 00:30:41,005 --> 00:30:42,630 Come on in. 687 00:30:43,713 --> 00:30:46,838 Madelyn was way out of line, and I'll talk to Jess. 688 00:30:46,921 --> 00:30:49,296 - No, I don't care about that. - I care about it. 689 00:30:49,380 --> 00:30:51,755 You told them I checked the wrong box. 690 00:30:51,838 --> 00:30:53,046 Who? 691 00:30:53,130 --> 00:30:55,588 Before the table read. You told them I checked the wrong box. 692 00:30:55,671 --> 00:30:58,255 Ah. (sighs) 693 00:30:58,338 --> 00:31:02,713 Uh, uh, well, it takes fewer words to say that than the truth. 694 00:31:02,796 --> 00:31:04,380 Doesn't make me look like a simpleton 695 00:31:04,463 --> 00:31:06,880 who's ill-equipped to participate in democracy? 696 00:31:06,963 --> 00:31:09,463 It was simpler, and it's nobody's goddamn business. 697 00:31:09,546 --> 00:31:11,505 Well, no. 698 00:31:11,588 --> 00:31:13,463 Pretty obviously it's everybody's goddamn business. 699 00:31:13,546 --> 00:31:15,963 (sighs) Ay. 700 00:31:16,046 --> 00:31:18,380 (sighs) 701 00:31:18,463 --> 00:31:20,630 You-you… you don't have to keep checking the papers. 702 00:31:20,713 --> 00:31:23,880 I've got people who'll let me know the moment an editor thinks about it. 703 00:31:23,963 --> 00:31:25,796 There's something wrong with the story, they know it, 704 00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:27,796 and that's why no one's reporting on Winchell. 705 00:31:27,880 --> 00:31:31,255 No. The Confidential story. 706 00:31:31,338 --> 00:31:33,046 That's what's getting picked up. 707 00:31:33,130 --> 00:31:35,296 ♫ ♫ 708 00:31:35,380 --> 00:31:36,796 (Desi sighs) 709 00:31:39,505 --> 00:31:42,713 (groans, mutters) 710 00:31:51,588 --> 00:31:53,546 I like this a lot, Tommy. 711 00:31:53,630 --> 00:31:55,796 - That's a great color for you. - Oh, I really like this. 712 00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:57,630 And I can cinch the back a little. 713 00:31:57,713 --> 00:31:59,838 - I can lower the neckline. - Oh, not on CBS you can't. 714 00:31:59,921 --> 00:32:01,463 (both laugh) 715 00:32:01,546 --> 00:32:03,088 But still, now we're talking. 716 00:32:03,171 --> 00:32:04,505 Now we're cooking with gas. 717 00:32:04,588 --> 00:32:07,588 - Should I bring out some shoes? - Oh, yes, please. 718 00:32:08,880 --> 00:32:10,755 (wolf whistle) 719 00:32:10,838 --> 00:32:11,921 Yeah? 720 00:32:12,005 --> 00:32:13,421 That's a nice dress. 721 00:32:13,505 --> 00:32:15,630 I thought so, too. 722 00:32:15,713 --> 00:32:18,046 You borrowing it from wardrobe for a cocktail party? 723 00:32:18,130 --> 00:32:19,505 (sighs) Dinner party. 724 00:32:19,588 --> 00:32:20,588 Where? 725 00:32:20,671 --> 00:32:23,588 The apartment of Ricky and Lucy Ricardo. 726 00:32:23,671 --> 00:32:24,671 This is for the show? 727 00:32:24,755 --> 00:32:26,963 - Lucy's invited Ethel… - Oh, Viv. 728 00:32:27,046 --> 00:32:28,130 I know, but listen. 729 00:32:28,213 --> 00:32:29,838 I'm thinking Lucy's invited her to dinner. 730 00:32:29,921 --> 00:32:33,338 She thinks she's being fixed up with an eligible guy. 731 00:32:33,421 --> 00:32:34,755 She'd want to look nice. 732 00:32:36,921 --> 00:32:38,630 It's something new for the character. 733 00:32:38,713 --> 00:32:41,213 LUCILLE: But the character's still Ethel Mertz, right? 734 00:32:41,296 --> 00:32:42,505 Yeah. 735 00:32:46,380 --> 00:32:47,296 Hey, don't. 736 00:32:47,380 --> 00:32:50,005 “Does Desi Love Lucy Loosely?” 737 00:32:50,088 --> 00:32:51,796 They took time on that. 738 00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:54,755 “If neighbors hear screams of rage followed by the sound of…” 739 00:32:54,838 --> 00:32:56,755 - Isn't there enough going on with… - ”…breaking crockery coming from 740 00:32:56,838 --> 00:32:58,963 - the Arnaz house this month…” - I'd be more concerned about… 741 00:32:59,046 --> 00:33:00,796 “…they'll know what is happening without having to investigate. 742 00:33:00,880 --> 00:33:02,463 “The red-haired missus has just finished reading 743 00:33:02,546 --> 00:33:03,880 - Confidential's report on…” - In your life, have you ever 744 00:33:03,963 --> 00:33:05,713 taken this stuff seriously? 745 00:33:05,796 --> 00:33:07,921 I take my marriage seriously. 746 00:33:08,005 --> 00:33:09,713 And Desi said? 747 00:33:09,796 --> 00:33:13,171 “Lucy, I ain't been with no girls since the moment I saw you.” 748 00:33:13,255 --> 00:33:15,130 - Then believe him. - I do believe him. 749 00:33:15,213 --> 00:33:16,546 It's an old picture. We were there together. 750 00:33:16,630 --> 00:33:18,380 He was playing cards on the boat Wednesday. 751 00:33:18,463 --> 00:33:20,463 You'd be more concerned about what? 752 00:33:20,546 --> 00:33:23,046 - What? -You said you'd “be more concerned about,” 753 00:33:23,130 --> 00:33:24,171 and I cut you off. 754 00:33:24,255 --> 00:33:25,296 The Winchell broadcast? 755 00:33:25,380 --> 00:33:26,963 Yeah. 756 00:33:27,046 --> 00:33:29,005 I don't get to choose just one. 757 00:33:29,088 --> 00:33:31,463 I'm concerned with both, the first thing, second thing. 758 00:33:31,546 --> 00:33:33,838 Understood. What about the third? 759 00:33:33,921 --> 00:33:35,296 What'd they say? 760 00:33:35,380 --> 00:33:38,713 We didn't think yesterday was the best day to tell them about the third thing. 761 00:33:38,796 --> 00:33:40,588 - Right. - We're doing it now. 762 00:33:40,671 --> 00:33:45,005 First Jess, then the network, then Philip Morris. 763 00:33:46,088 --> 00:33:47,963 Could be worse. 764 00:33:48,046 --> 00:33:49,213 How? 765 00:33:49,296 --> 00:33:51,088 You could be playing Ethel. 766 00:33:51,171 --> 00:33:52,671 Got it. 767 00:33:53,671 --> 00:33:55,671 ♫ ♫ 768 00:34:00,671 --> 00:34:02,671 (phone ringing in distance) 769 00:34:06,130 --> 00:34:08,296 Is Lucy on the phone too long at the top? 770 00:34:08,380 --> 00:34:11,796 We only hear one side of the call. Are we staying too long at the fair? 771 00:34:13,213 --> 00:34:15,963 You don't need to write down everything we say in here. 772 00:34:19,713 --> 00:34:21,255 We'll know when it's on its feet. 773 00:34:21,338 --> 00:34:22,671 - (knocking) - DESI: Good morning. 774 00:34:22,755 --> 00:34:24,630 Morning, guys. 775 00:34:24,713 --> 00:34:25,796 Hey. 776 00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:28,046 Mary Pat, would you mind giving us the room for a moment please? 777 00:34:28,130 --> 00:34:30,755 - Of course, Mr. Arnaz. - Thank you. 778 00:34:36,463 --> 00:34:38,963 - “Of course, Mr. Arnaz.” - She's nice. 779 00:34:39,046 --> 00:34:40,171 You're in enough trouble. 780 00:34:40,255 --> 00:34:41,463 LUCILLE: You're not in trouble. 781 00:34:41,546 --> 00:34:43,005 We need to talk. 782 00:34:43,088 --> 00:34:45,130 - No, don't tell me… - No, no, no, no. No, we're… 783 00:34:45,213 --> 00:34:46,213 No, no, we're still okay. 784 00:34:46,296 --> 00:34:47,463 - No one's picked up the story. - JESS: All right. 785 00:34:47,546 --> 00:34:48,796 (chuckles) Looking at Lucy's face, I thought for sure… 786 00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:50,213 I'm pregnant. 787 00:34:51,630 --> 00:34:52,630 (chuckles softly) 788 00:34:54,671 --> 00:34:56,505 That's not at all what I was gonna say. 789 00:34:56,588 --> 00:34:58,463 That's what we came to talk about. 790 00:34:58,546 --> 00:35:01,421 We were gonna have this conversation yesterday, but other things were… 791 00:35:01,505 --> 00:35:04,005 - Yeah, yeah, sure. - Well, this is a one-two punch. 792 00:35:04,088 --> 00:35:05,546 It's not a punch. I'm having a baby. 793 00:35:07,088 --> 00:35:09,046 What do we do now? 794 00:35:12,838 --> 00:35:15,046 I know it seems like no one said congratulations, 795 00:35:15,130 --> 00:35:16,112 but that cannot be, as these are three of… 796 00:35:16,136 --> 00:35:16,755 JESS: No, no, no, no. 797 00:35:16,838 --> 00:35:18,546 - …our closest friends and colleagues. - You're right. You're right. Sorry. 798 00:35:18,630 --> 00:35:19,921 - Oh, it's wonderful news. - Yeah, hey, congratulations. 799 00:35:20,005 --> 00:35:21,130 - Yes! Congratulations. - Yeah, that's great. 800 00:35:21,213 --> 00:35:22,463 - Thank you. - Another baby. 801 00:35:22,546 --> 00:35:23,921 - Gracias. - Yeah, mazel tov. 802 00:35:24,005 --> 00:35:25,546 - Gracias. Gracias. -Really, really. - Congratulations, Des. 803 00:35:25,630 --> 00:35:27,671 - Very happy. Very happy. - Yeah. 804 00:35:27,755 --> 00:35:29,630 - Very exciting. Yeah. - So, uh… 805 00:35:29,713 --> 00:35:31,171 - (clears throat) - LUCILLE: Yeah. 806 00:35:31,255 --> 00:35:33,255 With Lucie, I was the size of a phone booth, so… 807 00:35:33,338 --> 00:35:34,796 JESS: (chuckles) Yeah. 808 00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:36,880 You've got about seven weeks before you have to start 809 00:35:36,963 --> 00:35:39,171 hiding me behind boxes and chairs, 810 00:35:39,255 --> 00:35:43,130 and then another seven weeks after that before I won't fit in the frame. 811 00:35:43,213 --> 00:35:44,546 - What do you want to do? - Do? 812 00:35:44,630 --> 00:35:46,255 Whatever there was to do, we've done it. 813 00:35:46,338 --> 00:35:49,088 - Where does that leave us? - Without a choice. 814 00:35:49,171 --> 00:35:51,588 Lucy Ricardo is gonna have a baby on television. 815 00:35:53,505 --> 00:35:54,880 - No, no, Des. - How many scripts in the bank? 816 00:35:54,963 --> 00:35:56,130 We're-we're five ahead of production. 817 00:35:56,213 --> 00:35:57,338 We're shooting four and we're writing nine. 818 00:35:57,421 --> 00:35:59,296 Four. No harm done. 819 00:35:59,380 --> 00:36:02,005 But whatever script you're working on now, 820 00:36:02,088 --> 00:36:04,380 - episode nine, scratch it. - (chuckles) Okay. 821 00:36:04,463 --> 00:36:07,713 Episode– no, episode nine is now “Lucy Tells Ricky She's Pregnant,” 822 00:36:07,796 --> 00:36:09,671 and we work from there. What's that one? 823 00:36:10,796 --> 00:36:12,838 - JESS: Which one? - LUCILLE: “Lucy Goes to Italy.” 824 00:36:12,921 --> 00:36:14,421 We want to send the four of you to Italy. 825 00:36:14,505 --> 00:36:15,014 Why? 826 00:36:15,038 --> 00:36:16,588 MADELYN: We think it'd be nice to get off our set. 827 00:36:16,671 --> 00:36:18,921 No, why do the Ricardos and Mertzes go to Italy? 828 00:36:19,005 --> 00:36:21,338 - JESS: A vacation. - DESI: They don't vacation in Europe. 829 00:36:21,421 --> 00:36:23,588 They go to the Grand Canyon. 830 00:36:23,671 --> 00:36:25,505 - They go to Niagara Falls. - Work. 831 00:36:25,588 --> 00:36:27,713 - Ricky's got a gig at a club in Rome. - And what does Lucy do? 832 00:36:27,796 --> 00:36:30,005 She stomps grapes. 833 00:36:30,088 --> 00:36:32,296 Lucy and Ethel go to an Italian vineyard. 834 00:36:32,380 --> 00:36:34,088 - DESI: Why? - We don't know yet. 835 00:36:34,171 --> 00:36:35,880 And she stomps grapes. 836 00:36:35,963 --> 00:36:38,713 DESI: This vineyard is located in the 19th century? 837 00:36:38,796 --> 00:36:40,588 - JESS: They don't stomp grapes anymore? - (chuckles) No. 838 00:36:40,671 --> 00:36:43,255 MADELYN: Okay, so we find the one vineyard where they still stomp grapes. 839 00:36:43,338 --> 00:36:45,046 - (knocking) - LUCY: Come in. 840 00:36:45,130 --> 00:36:47,838 - Sì, signora. You sent for me? - Yes. 841 00:36:47,921 --> 00:36:49,921 Are there any grape vineyards around here? 842 00:36:50,005 --> 00:36:51,671 I'd like to know how they make the wine, 843 00:36:51,755 --> 00:36:54,755 how they pick the grapes, how they press the juice out with their feet. 844 00:36:54,838 --> 00:36:56,505 BELLMAN: There is one little town called Turo 845 00:36:56,588 --> 00:36:59,005 - where they still make the wine that way. - MADELYN: Easy. 846 00:36:59,088 --> 00:37:01,088 DESI: Why does she want to go to a vineyard? 847 00:37:01,171 --> 00:37:02,963 We don't know yet. 848 00:37:03,046 --> 00:37:04,963 She has an audition for an Italian movie. 849 00:37:05,046 --> 00:37:06,713 MADELYN: What does that have to do with stomping grapes? 850 00:37:06,796 --> 00:37:07,963 BOB: The part. 851 00:37:08,046 --> 00:37:10,171 VITTORIO: She happens to be just the type I need. 852 00:37:10,255 --> 00:37:12,838 The role of a beautiful Italian redhead 853 00:37:12,921 --> 00:37:15,421 who, uh– como si dice– uh, steps on grapes. 854 00:37:15,505 --> 00:37:17,963 (audience laughter) 855 00:37:18,046 --> 00:37:19,838 JESS: We'll get there. The point is 856 00:37:19,921 --> 00:37:21,880 (chuckles) Lucy in a vat of grapes for five minutes. 857 00:37:21,963 --> 00:37:23,630 I can see it. 858 00:37:24,713 --> 00:37:25,963 (speaks Italian) 859 00:37:27,046 --> 00:37:28,630 (audience laughter) 860 00:37:34,213 --> 00:37:36,005 (audience laughter) 861 00:37:37,088 --> 00:37:39,005 (footsteps squishing) 862 00:37:39,088 --> 00:37:41,380 (audience laughter continues) 863 00:37:46,338 --> 00:37:48,963 What can happen in the vat of grapes? What can she do? 864 00:37:50,046 --> 00:37:52,130 - (audience whispering) - (man in audience clears throat) 865 00:37:54,546 --> 00:37:56,171 JESS: It doesn't matter right now. 866 00:37:56,255 --> 00:37:59,338 We need to get back to– Des, the network isn't gonna allow it 867 00:37:59,421 --> 00:38:01,130 and neither will Philip Morris. Lucy… 868 00:38:01,213 --> 00:38:02,838 Just hang on. 869 00:38:02,921 --> 00:38:04,921 (audience whispering) 870 00:38:08,171 --> 00:38:09,796 - She loses an earring. - BOB: Yes. 871 00:38:09,880 --> 00:38:10,963 - MADELYN: There it is. - What are you talking about? 872 00:38:11,046 --> 00:38:12,088 In the grapes. 873 00:38:12,171 --> 00:38:13,630 (audience laughter) 874 00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:19,880 (audience laughter continues) 875 00:38:25,088 --> 00:38:26,796 (laughter grows) 876 00:38:32,546 --> 00:38:34,213 Push it to next year. 877 00:38:34,296 --> 00:38:36,088 They're not going to Italy while she's pregnant. 878 00:38:36,171 --> 00:38:38,463 I'll bet you my next paycheck against your next paycheck 879 00:38:38,546 --> 00:38:40,713 that CBS won't even allow us to use the word “pregnant.” 880 00:38:40,796 --> 00:38:43,755 - “Lucy Tells the Truth.” - BOB: That one's Madelyn's idea. 881 00:38:43,838 --> 00:38:46,380 - She got it just seconds after I pitched it. -Folks… 882 00:38:46,463 --> 00:38:49,171 MADELYN: Ricky bets Lucy that she can't go two days without lying, 883 00:38:49,255 --> 00:38:51,005 and we put her in situations where it's hard not to lie. 884 00:38:51,088 --> 00:38:53,005 LUCY: Okay, it's started. 885 00:38:53,088 --> 00:38:54,755 For the next 48 hours. 886 00:38:54,838 --> 00:38:56,213 - Okay. - All right. 887 00:38:56,296 --> 00:38:58,838 ETHEL: I can hardly wait to hear you tomorrow afternoon, Lucy. 888 00:38:58,921 --> 00:39:00,005 LUCY: Why? 889 00:39:00,088 --> 00:39:01,505 We're playing bridge at Carolyn's, remember? 890 00:39:01,588 --> 00:39:04,130 Oh, no, no, no. 891 00:39:04,213 --> 00:39:05,838 I can't spend the afternoon 892 00:39:05,921 --> 00:39:07,588 with three women and have to tell the truth. 893 00:39:07,671 --> 00:39:10,755 - (audience laughter) - I'll call Carolyn and tell her I'm sick. 894 00:39:12,463 --> 00:39:14,421 MADELYN: After 47 hours, 895 00:39:14,505 --> 00:39:16,963 - she's winning, but in the final hour… - BOB: Here it is. 896 00:39:17,046 --> 00:39:19,463 MADELYN: …Ricky gets a visit from the IRS, and the guy wants to ask about 897 00:39:19,546 --> 00:39:22,421 some questionable things that Ricky's claiming on his deductions. 898 00:39:22,505 --> 00:39:25,171 Lucy's sitting in the living room, too, and of course when she's asked 899 00:39:25,255 --> 00:39:28,046 by the IRS agent to corroborate, she can't tell a lie, so… 900 00:39:28,130 --> 00:39:29,338 That's a funny premise. 901 00:39:29,421 --> 00:39:30,755 Yes, it is. 902 00:39:30,838 --> 00:39:32,463 But lose the IRS scene. 903 00:39:32,546 --> 00:39:33,838 - Could be a good scene. - He's correct. 904 00:39:33,921 --> 00:39:35,088 Once I write it, it could be good. 905 00:39:35,171 --> 00:39:36,838 Ah, Ricky Ricardo loves America. 906 00:39:36,921 --> 00:39:38,213 He loves being an American. 907 00:39:38,296 --> 00:39:40,088 He's grateful to this country. 908 00:39:40,171 --> 00:39:41,421 He'd never cheat on his taxes. 909 00:39:41,505 --> 00:39:44,130 - It's very relatable. Everybody does. - I don't! Neither does Ricky. 910 00:39:44,213 --> 00:39:47,005 Especially when his wife is accused of being un-American. 911 00:39:47,088 --> 00:39:50,713 Look for something else, and start working on the first pregnancy show. 912 00:39:50,796 --> 00:39:52,130 - Listen to me. - What? 913 00:39:52,213 --> 00:39:53,796 They're not gonna let us do it. 914 00:39:53,880 --> 00:39:56,588 - Let that be my problem. - Oh, I wish I could, Des, 915 00:39:56,671 --> 00:39:58,463 but it's very much my problem, okay? 916 00:39:58,546 --> 00:40:01,755 So instead of talking about goddamn grapes, why don't… 917 00:40:02,838 --> 00:40:04,588 Look, what you got to understand is this. 918 00:40:04,671 --> 00:40:06,255 - We don't know… - Jess, they're free to take us off the air 919 00:40:06,338 --> 00:40:09,380 for the rest of the year while continuing to pay our contracts 920 00:40:09,463 --> 00:40:12,088 and answering questions about why motherhood is too salacious 921 00:40:12,171 --> 00:40:16,046 to put on CBS, but something tells me they're not gonna go that route. 922 00:40:16,130 --> 00:40:19,755 Instead, I think Broadcast Standards and Practices will give you 923 00:40:19,838 --> 00:40:22,671 a list of insane restrictions, which might even include 924 00:40:22,755 --> 00:40:24,796 you winning your bet with Desi, and which I have no doubt 925 00:40:24,880 --> 00:40:28,380 the three of you will navigate beautifully. 926 00:40:28,463 --> 00:40:29,588 You told me to be nice. 927 00:40:29,671 --> 00:40:31,546 Good? 928 00:40:31,630 --> 00:40:33,130 Yeah. 929 00:40:33,213 --> 00:40:35,213 (phone ringing in distance) 930 00:40:38,963 --> 00:40:42,088 I don't care what your first thoughts out of the gate were, 931 00:40:42,171 --> 00:40:45,213 but your first words out of the gate were no good. 932 00:40:45,296 --> 00:40:47,296 And what was with you at the table read? 933 00:40:48,380 --> 00:40:50,838 I'm sorry. She was jumping on every stage direction. 934 00:40:50,921 --> 00:40:51,963 It's her process. 935 00:40:52,046 --> 00:40:53,878 But that process usually happens in private. 936 00:40:53,902 --> 00:40:54,505 BOB: Yes. 937 00:40:54,588 --> 00:40:56,796 And following your advice, maybe every once in a while, 938 00:40:56,880 --> 00:40:59,921 the first words out of her mouth could be “good script.” 939 00:41:01,005 --> 00:41:04,046 Well, is this the right week for this shit? 940 00:41:04,130 --> 00:41:06,505 - Hey. - We do seem to be having some success, no? 941 00:41:06,588 --> 00:41:09,213 We're all really tired from working on this week's script. 942 00:41:09,296 --> 00:41:11,296 Oh, are you sleepy? You need a nap? 943 00:41:11,380 --> 00:41:13,171 - Can I talk to you for a second, boss? - Sure. 944 00:41:20,213 --> 00:41:21,796 I'm the executive producer of this show. 945 00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:23,838 You can't manhandle me like that in front of other people. 946 00:41:23,921 --> 00:41:25,463 You just can't do it. My show. 947 00:41:25,546 --> 00:41:26,921 And Madelyn was a hundred percent right. 948 00:41:27,005 --> 00:41:28,921 - Ricky pays his taxes. - I get it. 949 00:41:29,005 --> 00:41:31,046 And we're having the baby on the show. 950 00:41:31,130 --> 00:41:33,130 There's no chance they say yes. 951 00:41:34,213 --> 00:41:36,880 There's no chance they say yes to you. 952 00:41:41,463 --> 00:41:43,463 Did you get all that? 953 00:41:43,546 --> 00:41:44,463 Yes. 954 00:41:44,546 --> 00:41:46,130 That was a joke. 955 00:41:47,130 --> 00:41:49,421 DONALD: Back to right before Vivian's entrance. 956 00:41:49,505 --> 00:41:51,171 “When do we eat?” 957 00:41:51,255 --> 00:41:53,338 Settle. And action. 958 00:41:53,421 --> 00:41:55,880 Uh, when do we eat? 959 00:41:55,963 --> 00:41:58,088 I've been living on peanut butter sandwiches. 960 00:41:58,171 --> 00:42:00,171 DONALD: Bill, that line's got to take you over to the table. 961 00:42:00,255 --> 00:42:01,838 - Hmm? - You need to cross to the table on that. 962 00:42:01,921 --> 00:42:03,171 Why? 963 00:42:03,255 --> 00:42:04,671 - Because we need to… - LUCILLE: So you can see the table, 964 00:42:04,755 --> 00:42:07,671 notice that a fourth place is set and say your next line. 965 00:42:09,838 --> 00:42:11,796 Uh, someone else coming? 966 00:42:11,880 --> 00:42:16,255 Well, Fred, I took the liberty of asking a young lady to be your dinner companion. 967 00:42:16,338 --> 00:42:18,505 - A young lady? - A cute young chick. 968 00:42:18,588 --> 00:42:21,046 - Oh, boy, bring her on. - Uh-uh. 969 00:42:21,130 --> 00:42:22,630 - Hang on. - What? 970 00:42:22,713 --> 00:42:24,921 LUCILLE: When I say, “I took the liberty of asking 971 00:42:25,005 --> 00:42:26,838 - a young lady to be your dinner companion…” -Mm-hmm. 972 00:42:26,921 --> 00:42:30,380 …Ricky should take a sip from a glass of water on the table to keep from laughing. 973 00:42:30,463 --> 00:42:32,088 - And then when I say, “A cute young chick…” -Uh-huh. 974 00:42:32,171 --> 00:42:33,546 …he should choke on his water a little. 975 00:42:33,630 --> 00:42:35,380 - I like that. - I like it, too. 976 00:42:35,463 --> 00:42:39,421 The very idea that Ethel's a cute young chick should make Desi choke. 977 00:42:41,255 --> 00:42:42,713 ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: That's 15. 978 00:42:42,796 --> 00:42:44,921 - Okay. - That's 15 minutes! 979 00:42:45,005 --> 00:42:46,421 (indistinct chatter) 980 00:42:46,505 --> 00:42:47,713 I'll be funny by Friday. 981 00:42:47,796 --> 00:42:50,463 And when can we expect you to be funny? 982 00:43:04,713 --> 00:43:07,421 - (door closes) - “Exactly what makes a husband leave home 983 00:43:07,505 --> 00:43:10,963 - is something that has been baffling wives since Adam and Eve.” -Enough. 984 00:43:11,046 --> 00:43:14,505 “For an outstanding example, let's take one of the nation's most famous husbands.” 985 00:43:14,588 --> 00:43:17,088 - You've memorized it? - I've memorized worse writing than this. 986 00:43:17,171 --> 00:43:19,713 - Yes, it's a tabloid. - “With a curvy, red-haired tidbit 987 00:43:19,796 --> 00:43:24,338 like Lucy waiting for him at home, would Desi be foolish enough…” 988 00:43:24,421 --> 00:43:27,088 - Stop it. -”…to prowl Hollywood like a bachelor wolf? 989 00:43:27,171 --> 00:43:29,171 - If so, why?” - It's made up. 990 00:43:30,255 --> 00:43:32,380 - 20 million readers want to know. - Lucy… 991 00:43:32,463 --> 00:43:34,630 - 20 million and one. - How many times 992 00:43:34,713 --> 00:43:37,713 I got to 'splain where I was and what I was doing? 993 00:43:37,796 --> 00:43:39,838 How many times you got to 'splain? 994 00:43:39,921 --> 00:43:42,296 (chuckles) I can't get enough of that joke. 995 00:43:43,505 --> 00:43:45,130 They document an entire night. 996 00:43:45,213 --> 00:43:47,088 Someone in your gang's a rat. 997 00:43:47,171 --> 00:43:48,171 My gang. 998 00:43:48,255 --> 00:43:49,880 (scoffs) 999 00:43:49,963 --> 00:43:53,505 The night they're talking about, I was with Red Skelton and Xavier Cugat. 1000 00:43:53,588 --> 00:43:56,713 - Which one of them you think squealed? - They made it up from nothing? 1001 00:43:56,796 --> 00:43:58,963 I heard on Winchell the other night that you were a Communist. 1002 00:43:59,046 --> 00:44:01,088 That was true, you idiot! 1003 00:44:01,171 --> 00:44:03,088 Yeah. That was a bad example. 1004 00:44:03,171 --> 00:44:04,671 And I didn't check the wrong box. 1005 00:44:06,005 --> 00:44:07,755 Okay, I'm sorry about that. 1006 00:44:09,213 --> 00:44:11,421 I believe you. 1007 00:44:11,505 --> 00:44:13,588 - I'm just messing around. - Good. 1008 00:44:14,921 --> 00:44:18,005 No. That gets you out of the woods, but it puts you into other woods. 1009 00:44:18,088 --> 00:44:19,255 What are the other woods? 1010 00:44:19,338 --> 00:44:21,380 You don't come home anymore. Did you know that? 1011 00:44:21,463 --> 00:44:23,796 - You change subjects faster than… - Keep up. 1012 00:44:23,880 --> 00:44:25,171 It's not hard. 1013 00:44:25,255 --> 00:44:28,421 I asked, “Did you know you don't come home anymore?” 1014 00:44:28,505 --> 00:44:29,838 Of course I come home. 1015 00:44:29,921 --> 00:44:32,755 Sometimes I go to the boat and play cards. 1016 00:44:32,838 --> 00:44:35,880 We drink, it goes late, it's easier to sleep on the boat. 1017 00:44:37,630 --> 00:44:39,380 That used to be once a week, then twice. 1018 00:44:39,463 --> 00:44:41,880 Now it's four or five times. 1019 00:44:44,005 --> 00:44:46,130 I go home after work, you go to the boat. 1020 00:44:48,421 --> 00:44:50,213 You once asked me what my ambition was. 1021 00:44:50,296 --> 00:44:51,296 You remember? 1022 00:44:51,380 --> 00:44:53,671 Mm-hmm. 1023 00:44:53,755 --> 00:44:55,755 And you liked my answer. 1024 00:44:58,005 --> 00:45:00,463 She used the word “home” a lot. 1025 00:45:00,546 --> 00:45:04,005 She talked about having a home. 1026 00:45:04,088 --> 00:45:08,046 Lucy owned three houses, but sometimes, when she fell into a funk, 1027 00:45:08,130 --> 00:45:11,838 she'd say… she didn't have a home. 1028 00:45:11,921 --> 00:45:14,005 They eloped. 1029 00:45:14,088 --> 00:45:15,630 They bought a ranch in Chatsworth. 1030 00:45:15,713 --> 00:45:19,838 They were deeply in love and deliriously happy. 1031 00:45:19,921 --> 00:45:23,630 What you got to understand is they weren't very happy. 1032 00:45:23,713 --> 00:45:25,463 They never saw each other. 1033 00:45:25,546 --> 00:45:28,921 Desi and his orchestra were booked at Ciro's. 1034 00:45:29,005 --> 00:45:31,880 Lucy was under contract at RKO. 1035 00:45:31,963 --> 00:45:36,463 Desi would be done with work around 4:00 a.m. 1036 00:45:36,546 --> 00:45:38,630 Lucy had to be in hair and makeup at 5:00 a.m. 1037 00:45:38,713 --> 00:45:40,838 They'd meet at the top of Mulholland. 1038 00:45:41,921 --> 00:45:44,713 ♫ band playing “Babalú" ♫ 1039 00:45:45,838 --> 00:45:47,921 ♫ Babalú ♫ 1040 00:45:48,963 --> 00:45:51,088 - ♫ Babalú ♫ - (audience shouting excitedly) 1041 00:45:52,380 --> 00:45:53,588 ♫ Babalú ♫ 1042 00:45:53,671 --> 00:45:55,213 ♫ Ayé ♫ 1043 00:45:55,296 --> 00:45:58,005 ♫ Babalú ayé ♫ 1044 00:45:58,088 --> 00:46:00,755 - (women laughing) - (lively music continues) 1045 00:46:07,755 --> 00:46:09,380 (horns stop, drumming continues) 1046 00:46:09,463 --> 00:46:11,796 ♫ Olé, olé, olé, olé ♫ 1047 00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:14,755 - ♫ Olé, olé, olé, olé ♫ - ♫ Olé, olé, olé, olé ♫ 1048 00:46:14,838 --> 00:46:16,505 ♫ Olé, olé, olé, olé ♫ 1049 00:46:16,588 --> 00:46:19,713 - ♫ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♫ - ♫ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♫ 1050 00:46:19,796 --> 00:46:23,380 - ♫ Arriba con la conga ♫ - ♫ Arriba con la conga. ♫ 1051 00:46:23,463 --> 00:46:25,088 (drumming intensifies) 1052 00:46:25,171 --> 00:46:27,171 (audience cheering) 1053 00:46:27,255 --> 00:46:28,921 (horns join in, music builds) 1054 00:46:35,130 --> 00:46:37,380 - (song ends) - (audience cheering) 1055 00:46:39,505 --> 00:46:40,713 (lively chatter, laughter) 1056 00:46:40,796 --> 00:46:42,755 - What do we have here? - WOMAN: Yeah, Desi! 1057 00:46:42,838 --> 00:46:43,963 A lot of choices. 1058 00:46:44,046 --> 00:46:46,796 There's only one choice for me, and she's got a powerful right hook. 1059 00:46:46,880 --> 00:46:50,296 My friend and I saw the midnight show and the 2:00 a.m. 1060 00:46:50,380 --> 00:46:51,588 (chuckles) 1061 00:46:51,671 --> 00:46:53,255 Thank you. 1062 00:46:53,338 --> 00:46:55,130 WOMAN: Aw. 1063 00:46:55,213 --> 00:46:57,130 ♫ ♫ 1064 00:46:57,213 --> 00:46:59,213 (birds chirping) 1065 00:47:18,755 --> 00:47:20,088 I did the calculation. 1066 00:47:20,171 --> 00:47:21,546 In the course of one week, 1067 00:47:21,630 --> 00:47:24,588 I see you 1/20th as much as your second trombone player. 1068 00:47:25,671 --> 00:47:28,755 Well, learn to play the trombone, and I'll give you his job. 1069 00:47:28,838 --> 00:47:31,046 Well, how hard is the trombone? 1070 00:47:33,046 --> 00:47:36,505 Ay, maybe it'd be better if we didn't spend the little time we have 1071 00:47:36,588 --> 00:47:39,671 arguing about why we don't have more time. 1072 00:47:39,755 --> 00:47:43,005 Don't make me feel like a bitch because I want to see my husband. 1073 00:47:43,088 --> 00:47:45,421 - Hey. - (sighs) 1074 00:47:45,505 --> 00:47:49,630 I-I could stay home and be kept by my wife. 1075 00:47:50,630 --> 00:47:53,671 I mean, that'd really complete the picture Americans have of Cuban men. 1076 00:47:53,755 --> 00:47:55,921 What home are you talking about? 1077 00:47:56,005 --> 00:47:59,880 Or you could quit the film business and just be my wife. 1078 00:47:59,963 --> 00:48:01,880 But you ain't gonna do that, right? 1079 00:48:01,963 --> 00:48:03,338 No. 1080 00:48:03,421 --> 00:48:05,380 How about you come to the club more to watch the show? 1081 00:48:08,171 --> 00:48:09,880 I had a picture open five days ago. 1082 00:48:09,963 --> 00:48:12,130 You really want me to come down to the club? 1083 00:48:12,213 --> 00:48:13,713 Why not? 1084 00:48:15,213 --> 00:48:17,005 Okay. 1085 00:48:17,088 --> 00:48:19,630 ♫ band playing “Cuban Pete" ♫ 1086 00:48:19,713 --> 00:48:22,380 ♫ They call me Cuban Pete ♫ 1087 00:48:22,463 --> 00:48:24,921 ♫ I'm the king of the rumba beat ♫ 1088 00:48:25,005 --> 00:48:26,421 ♫ When I play the maracas, I go ♫ 1089 00:48:26,505 --> 00:48:29,505 ♫ Chick chicky boom, chick chicky boom ♫ 1090 00:48:29,588 --> 00:48:31,463 ♫ Yes, sir, I'm Cuban Pete ♫ 1091 00:48:31,546 --> 00:48:33,755 ♫ I'm the craze of my native street ♫ 1092 00:48:33,838 --> 00:48:35,671 ♫ When I start to dance, everything goes ♫ 1093 00:48:35,755 --> 00:48:38,171 ♫ Chick chicky boom, chick chicky boom ♫ 1094 00:48:38,255 --> 00:48:41,046 - ♫ The señoritas, they sing ♫ - (women chattering excitedly) 1095 00:48:41,130 --> 00:48:43,671 ♫ And how they swing with this rumbero ♫ 1096 00:48:43,755 --> 00:48:45,671 ♫ It's very nice ♫ 1097 00:48:45,755 --> 00:48:47,046 ♫ So full of spice ♫ 1098 00:48:47,130 --> 00:48:48,130 (laughs) 1099 00:48:48,213 --> 00:48:50,046 ♫ And when they're dancing ♫ 1100 00:48:50,130 --> 00:48:52,546 ♫ They bring a happy ring, the maraquero ♫ 1101 00:48:52,630 --> 00:48:54,380 ♫ Singing a song ♫ 1102 00:48:54,463 --> 00:48:56,630 - ♫ All the day long. ♫ - (song ends) 1103 00:48:56,713 --> 00:48:59,296 Ah! What do we have here? 1104 00:48:59,380 --> 00:49:01,088 - (cheering) - MAN: Lucy! 1105 00:49:01,171 --> 00:49:03,171 (excited chatter) 1106 00:49:03,255 --> 00:49:05,088 ♫ ♫ 1107 00:49:06,296 --> 00:49:07,880 MAN: This way, Miss Ball! Hollywood Citizen! 1108 00:49:07,963 --> 00:49:09,630 WOMAN: We love you in the movie! 1109 00:49:09,713 --> 00:49:11,713 - Thank you. - Wasn't the show fun? 1110 00:49:16,505 --> 00:49:18,671 - (knocking) - VIVIAN: Come on in. 1111 00:49:20,338 --> 00:49:21,338 Good morning. 1112 00:49:21,421 --> 00:49:23,088 Hey, Maddie. 1113 00:49:23,171 --> 00:49:24,921 (sighs) Some week, huh? 1114 00:49:25,005 --> 00:49:27,046 Lucille Ball's a threat to the American way of life? 1115 00:49:27,130 --> 00:49:29,630 She's a threat to writers, camera operators and Desi, 1116 00:49:29,713 --> 00:49:30,796 but it really stops there. 1117 00:49:30,880 --> 00:49:32,713 Have you ever had a week like this? 1118 00:49:32,796 --> 00:49:35,088 No, but we work in Hollywood, and something tells me 1119 00:49:35,171 --> 00:49:37,588 we're all gonna have weeks like this before that committee's done. 1120 00:49:37,671 --> 00:49:39,296 (chuckles softly) 1121 00:49:39,380 --> 00:49:41,130 - Look what you can still do. - Still? 1122 00:49:41,213 --> 00:49:43,755 (chuckles) I regretted it even before I said it. 1123 00:49:43,838 --> 00:49:46,005 I can't do that, and I'm just impressed. 1124 00:49:46,088 --> 00:49:47,255 What's in your hands? 1125 00:49:47,338 --> 00:49:49,130 I got you some breakfast from the commissary. 1126 00:49:49,213 --> 00:49:50,796 They told me you didn't have any, but… 1127 00:49:50,880 --> 00:49:53,463 I did. I had a cup of coffee and half a grapefruit. 1128 00:49:53,546 --> 00:49:56,255 Well, I have French toast, bacon, eggs and potatoes. 1129 00:49:56,338 --> 00:49:58,296 - Enjoy it. - It's for you. 1130 00:49:58,380 --> 00:50:00,713 That was very sweet, but, no, thank you. 1131 00:50:02,588 --> 00:50:04,463 Is it just me or have you lost a little weight? 1132 00:50:04,546 --> 00:50:06,213 I have. 1133 00:50:06,296 --> 00:50:08,338 Well, you look great. 1134 00:50:08,421 --> 00:50:09,921 Thank you. 1135 00:50:14,546 --> 00:50:16,838 - I'll see you onstage. - Mm-hmm. 1136 00:50:16,921 --> 00:50:19,546 - Madelyn. - Yeah? 1137 00:50:19,630 --> 00:50:22,088 Who told you that I didn't have any breakfast? 1138 00:50:24,671 --> 00:50:26,671 (sighs) I don't know. 1139 00:50:26,755 --> 00:50:28,963 I think… 1140 00:50:29,046 --> 00:50:30,921 It was Tino. 1141 00:50:31,005 --> 00:50:32,255 The tall waiter. 1142 00:50:32,338 --> 00:50:33,796 (whispers) Okay. 1143 00:50:34,880 --> 00:50:36,088 (softly) Yeah. 1144 00:50:38,880 --> 00:50:41,046 (sighs) Jesus Christ. 1145 00:50:41,130 --> 00:50:43,630 Day three and still no pickup on the Winchell story. 1146 00:50:43,713 --> 00:50:45,546 - Fellas, I think we're out of this. - (chuckles) Might be. 1147 00:50:45,630 --> 00:50:47,505 - Might be. - Howard? 1148 00:50:47,588 --> 00:50:50,005 There's another shoe, and none of us are getting out of this alive. 1149 00:50:50,088 --> 00:50:51,255 JOE: Howard. 1150 00:50:51,338 --> 00:50:52,880 They're uncovering something new, 1151 00:50:52,963 --> 00:50:56,171 they're chasing the original testimony, something, 1152 00:50:56,255 --> 00:50:57,463 but there's another shoe. 1153 00:50:57,546 --> 00:50:59,505 There's nothing more to uncover. There are no more shoes. 1154 00:50:59,588 --> 00:51:01,880 - Lucy's pregnant. - Well, that. 1155 00:51:06,213 --> 00:51:07,255 What? 1156 00:51:07,338 --> 00:51:08,338 Lucy's pregnant. 1157 00:51:08,421 --> 00:51:09,755 With a baby? 1158 00:51:09,838 --> 00:51:11,588 Mm-hmm. 1159 00:51:11,671 --> 00:51:12,796 ROGER: How… 1160 00:51:12,880 --> 00:51:15,213 I'm… (clears throat) not sure what words to use. 1161 00:51:15,296 --> 00:51:18,255 How much pregnant are you? 1162 00:51:18,338 --> 00:51:20,630 Why did you think you didn't know what words to use? 1163 00:51:20,713 --> 00:51:22,921 He means how far, as a percentage of nine months– 1164 00:51:23,005 --> 00:51:24,838 where are you on-on the timeline of-of the… 1165 00:51:24,921 --> 00:51:26,630 Someone should point a goddamn camera at this. 1166 00:51:26,713 --> 00:51:27,880 DESI: She's 12 weeks pregnant. 1167 00:51:27,963 --> 00:51:28,921 So that means, uh… 1168 00:51:29,005 --> 00:51:30,921 12 weeks ago, I fucked my husband. 1169 00:51:31,005 --> 00:51:31,963 - Whoa, whoa, whoa! -No, no, no. - (overlapping chatter) 1170 00:51:32,046 --> 00:51:34,088 (laughing) 1171 00:51:34,171 --> 00:51:36,005 DESI: She'll start showing in about 1172 00:51:36,088 --> 00:51:40,505 six weeks, and a month after that, (sighs) there won't be any hiding it. 1173 00:51:40,588 --> 00:51:42,005 This isn't a problem. 1174 00:51:42,088 --> 00:51:43,505 - It's not. - This has happened before. 1175 00:51:43,588 --> 00:51:46,671 I won't say names, but it's been dealt with. 1176 00:51:46,755 --> 00:51:49,255 Is he talking about having me killed? 1177 00:51:49,338 --> 00:51:51,171 No, you carry a basket of laundry, 1178 00:51:51,255 --> 00:51:53,963 stand behind chairs, you sit with a pillow on your lap. 1179 00:51:54,046 --> 00:51:55,630 Those are great ideas, especially having Lucy 1180 00:51:55,713 --> 00:51:57,171 carry a basket of laundry in every scene. 1181 00:51:57,255 --> 00:51:58,505 Or stand behind chairs. 1182 00:51:58,588 --> 00:52:01,838 Where in the Ricardo's living room are the giant chairs you're talking about? 1183 00:52:01,921 --> 00:52:04,046 Lucy and Ricky redecorate, huh? 1184 00:52:04,130 --> 00:52:05,630 The writers can get some fun out of this. 1185 00:52:05,713 --> 00:52:07,963 Maybe they get some large ficus trees. 1186 00:52:08,046 --> 00:52:09,296 They'd have to be California redwoods, 1187 00:52:09,380 --> 00:52:11,838 and I'd have to stand behind them anytime I wasn't doing the wash. 1188 00:52:11,921 --> 00:52:13,130 Well, what do you propose? 1189 00:52:13,213 --> 00:52:14,630 That the Ricardos have a baby. 1190 00:52:14,713 --> 00:52:16,921 (laughter) 1191 00:52:17,005 --> 00:52:18,671 What do you mean? 1192 00:52:18,755 --> 00:52:20,463 I told you it was gonna be like this. 1193 00:52:20,546 --> 00:52:24,005 Lucy Ricardo will be pregnant on the show. 1194 00:52:24,088 --> 00:52:29,171 An eight-episode arc starting with Lucy telling Ricky the happy news 1195 00:52:29,255 --> 00:52:32,088 - and ending with the birth of the baby. - ROGER: (laughs) No. 1196 00:52:32,171 --> 00:52:33,838 No, no, no. 1197 00:52:33,921 --> 00:52:35,421 You can't have a pregnant woman on television. 1198 00:52:35,505 --> 00:52:36,630 DESI: Why not? 1199 00:52:36,713 --> 00:52:37,713 Because it's television. 1200 00:52:37,796 --> 00:52:39,380 We come into people's homes. 1201 00:52:39,463 --> 00:52:41,588 Pregnant women often vomit. 1202 00:52:41,671 --> 00:52:43,463 I know I could any second. 1203 00:52:43,546 --> 00:52:45,546 - May I say something? - Frankly, I can't wait. 1204 00:52:45,630 --> 00:52:48,630 If Lucy Ricardo's pregnant, the audience's mind immediately goes 1205 00:52:48,713 --> 00:52:50,005 to how did she get that way. 1206 00:52:50,088 --> 00:52:51,338 Lucy and Ricky sleep in separate beds. 1207 00:52:51,421 --> 00:52:53,338 We'll be pushing the beds together, too. 1208 00:52:53,421 --> 00:52:54,880 - Oh. -Oh, no. - Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. 1209 00:52:54,963 --> 00:52:57,421 I'm sorry, Des, we're gonna have to put our foot down on this one. 1210 00:52:57,505 --> 00:52:59,546 You can't do it. End of discussion. 1211 00:53:02,421 --> 00:53:03,671 (groans) 1212 00:53:03,755 --> 00:53:05,838 ♫ ♫ 1213 00:53:05,921 --> 00:53:09,463 Miss Rosen, will you come in please, with a pad and pen? 1214 00:53:13,505 --> 00:53:14,921 - My secretary. - (footsteps approaching) 1215 00:53:16,338 --> 00:53:17,880 What are you doing? 1216 00:53:17,963 --> 00:53:19,713 To Mr. Alfred Lyons, Chairman of the Board of Philip Morris. 1217 00:53:19,796 --> 00:53:21,213 HOWARD: We don't want to bring Mr. Lyons into this. 1218 00:53:21,296 --> 00:53:23,796 “Mr. Lyons, I guess it all comes down to you. 1219 00:53:23,880 --> 00:53:26,463 “You are the man who's paying the money for this show, 1220 00:53:26,546 --> 00:53:28,213 and I'll do whatever you decide.” 1221 00:53:28,296 --> 00:53:30,505 Mr. Lyons doesn't get involved at this level. 1222 00:53:30,588 --> 00:53:33,380 “There's only one thing I want to make certain that you understand.” 1223 00:53:33,463 --> 00:53:35,171 - Desi… - “We've given you 1224 00:53:35,255 --> 00:53:37,171 “the number one show on television, 1225 00:53:37,255 --> 00:53:41,505 “and up until now, the creative decisions have been in our hands. 1226 00:53:41,588 --> 00:53:45,213 They are now telling us that Lucy and Ricky can't have a baby on the show.” 1227 00:53:45,296 --> 00:53:46,421 That's not exactly what we said. 1228 00:53:46,505 --> 00:53:48,963 “All I ask from you, if you agree with them, 1229 00:53:49,046 --> 00:53:52,546 “is that you inform them that we will not accept them telling us what not to do 1230 00:53:52,630 --> 00:53:58,088 “unless, beginning with our next episode, they also tell us what to do. 1231 00:53:58,171 --> 00:54:00,713 Sincerely,” et cetera, et cetera. Thank you. 1232 00:54:00,796 --> 00:54:03,171 - And send it by telegram please. - Yes, sir. 1233 00:54:05,713 --> 00:54:08,130 And that wasn't even why I married him. 1234 00:54:11,796 --> 00:54:12,796 That was. 1235 00:54:15,380 --> 00:54:17,380 ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: Quiet please! Rehearsal's up! 1236 00:54:17,463 --> 00:54:20,171 Lucy, let me out of here! 1237 00:54:20,255 --> 00:54:21,713 Untie this coat! 1238 00:54:21,796 --> 00:54:23,630 Not until you kiss and make up. 1239 00:54:23,713 --> 00:54:26,421 I'll never make up with him after the things he said. 1240 00:54:26,505 --> 00:54:28,588 What about the things you said to me? 1241 00:54:28,671 --> 00:54:30,713 She said my mother looks like a weasel. 1242 00:54:30,796 --> 00:54:33,046 - Apologize, Ethel. - No. 1243 00:54:33,130 --> 00:54:36,463 Oh, come on, Ethel. Tell him you're sorry. 1244 00:54:36,546 --> 00:54:37,630 Well… 1245 00:54:37,713 --> 00:54:39,755 I'm sorry your mother looks like a weasel. 1246 00:54:39,838 --> 00:54:41,755 Now, Ethel. 1247 00:54:41,838 --> 00:54:43,130 Well, he should have more consideration. 1248 00:54:43,213 --> 00:54:45,296 After all, I gave him the best years of my life. 1249 00:54:45,380 --> 00:54:47,880 - Were those the best? - (gasps) 1250 00:54:47,963 --> 00:54:49,755 All right, all right, now you're even. 1251 00:54:49,838 --> 00:54:51,755 Now, what are your terms for making up, Ethel? 1252 00:54:51,838 --> 00:54:53,296 Well, he should… 1253 00:54:53,380 --> 00:54:56,046 We should go back to the dinner table. 1254 00:54:57,130 --> 00:54:59,755 - What was that? - We should go back to the dinner table. 1255 00:54:59,838 --> 00:55:02,963 I think, given the time, we should move on. 1256 00:55:03,046 --> 00:55:04,046 It was good. 1257 00:55:04,130 --> 00:55:05,838 Yeah, except, no, it wasn't. 1258 00:55:05,921 --> 00:55:06,963 - What? - Good. 1259 00:55:07,046 --> 00:55:08,671 - Wasn't good. - Uh… 1260 00:55:08,755 --> 00:55:09,755 Ah, let's go back. 1261 00:55:09,838 --> 00:55:11,130 WILLIAM: What's happening? 1262 00:55:11,213 --> 00:55:12,463 VIVIAN: (sighs) She wants to go back. 1263 00:55:12,546 --> 00:55:13,588 - WILLIAM: To what? - The dinner scene. 1264 00:55:13,671 --> 00:55:15,213 WILLIAM: What? 1265 00:55:15,296 --> 00:55:17,921 VIVIAN: The dinner scene, you drunken yontz! 1266 00:55:18,005 --> 00:55:19,755 WILLIAM: Have we hired anyone to play Ethel yet? 1267 00:55:19,838 --> 00:55:21,088 All right, let's go. 1268 00:55:21,171 --> 00:55:22,296 Go forward or go back to the dinner scene? 1269 00:55:22,380 --> 00:55:23,380 Back. 1270 00:55:23,463 --> 00:55:25,005 (sighs heavily) 1271 00:55:25,088 --> 00:55:27,630 Page 15. This is still scene “A.” 1272 00:55:27,713 --> 00:55:29,255 From, “You're right, he's not going to do me out of dinner.” 1273 00:55:29,338 --> 00:55:31,546 - Cameras reset. Props reset. - VIVIAN: Someone's gonna need to tell us 1274 00:55:31,630 --> 00:55:33,338 what was wrong with the scene in the first place. 1275 00:55:33,421 --> 00:55:34,671 - WILLIAM: You were in it. - DESI: Bill. 1276 00:55:34,755 --> 00:55:36,505 Something fundamental was wrong. I'll figure out what. 1277 00:55:36,588 --> 00:55:37,671 I can figure out what. 1278 00:55:37,755 --> 00:55:39,421 - Let's all do our individual jobs. - (sighs) 1279 00:55:39,505 --> 00:55:41,213 (quietly) I hit him in the face until he's bleeding– 1280 00:55:41,296 --> 00:55:43,463 - does our insurance cover that? - DESI: Yeah, I got the platinum plan. 1281 00:55:43,546 --> 00:55:44,796 Good job. 1282 00:55:44,880 --> 00:55:46,380 - Ready, ready. - Quiet please! 1283 00:55:46,463 --> 00:55:47,755 Rehearsal's up! 1284 00:55:47,838 --> 00:55:50,130 DONALD: From, “You're right, he's not going to do me out of dinner.” 1285 00:55:50,213 --> 00:55:51,255 Settle. 1286 00:55:51,338 --> 00:55:53,546 And action. 1287 00:55:53,630 --> 00:55:54,880 Uh, you're right. 1288 00:55:54,963 --> 00:55:57,046 He's not gonna do me out of dinner. 1289 00:55:57,130 --> 00:55:58,338 Good. 1290 00:55:58,421 --> 00:56:01,255 Oh. Now, sit down, everyone. 1291 00:56:03,255 --> 00:56:06,213 We don't have any more chairs. 1292 00:56:06,296 --> 00:56:08,921 You two don't mind sharing, do you? 1293 00:56:11,546 --> 00:56:13,380 The roast beef should be precut. 1294 00:56:13,463 --> 00:56:15,130 - It will be, dear. - DESI: How's that, Ethel? 1295 00:56:15,213 --> 00:56:17,171 - Not too much fat, is there? - VIVIAN: There certainly is. 1296 00:56:17,255 --> 00:56:18,255 He means the meat. 1297 00:56:18,338 --> 00:56:19,796 Oh, no, the meat is fine. 1298 00:56:19,880 --> 00:56:22,421 LUCILLE: Now do your thing. 1299 00:56:22,505 --> 00:56:24,380 Come on. 1300 00:56:24,463 --> 00:56:25,630 - Mm. - DONALD: Perfect. 1301 00:56:25,713 --> 00:56:27,046 - Yeah? - Moving on. 1302 00:56:27,130 --> 00:56:29,130 - MAN: Moving… - Staying put. -Why? 1303 00:56:29,213 --> 00:56:30,755 We need to work out the moves at the table. 1304 00:56:30,838 --> 00:56:32,213 Bill and I can work out the moves. 1305 00:56:32,296 --> 00:56:33,880 It's not that I'm not confident that you can't work out… 1306 00:56:33,963 --> 00:56:35,463 This is camera blocking. 1307 00:56:35,546 --> 00:56:37,963 We can work out the stage business during tomorrow's run-through. 1308 00:56:38,046 --> 00:56:40,421 I would strongly prefer that we do it now. 1309 00:56:40,505 --> 00:56:42,963 I have to exercise my directorial authority. 1310 00:56:43,046 --> 00:56:44,755 - You have to do what? - DESI: Let's take a break. 1311 00:56:44,838 --> 00:56:46,796 - It's not time for a break. - Good, then, that's ten minutes. 1312 00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:48,880 Ten minutes, we come back to scene “A”! 1313 00:56:48,963 --> 00:56:51,255 - No, we don't. - Maybe we don't. It's hard to say. 1314 00:56:51,338 --> 00:56:53,338 (indistinct chatter) 1315 00:56:57,171 --> 00:56:58,630 Tell me what's happening, honey. 1316 00:56:58,713 --> 00:56:59,713 (exhaling musically) 1317 00:56:59,796 --> 00:57:01,255 - You know what occurs to me? - Mm-hmm? 1318 00:57:01,338 --> 00:57:02,921 At the top, it should be clear 1319 00:57:03,005 --> 00:57:04,255 that I'm setting a nice table, right? 1320 00:57:04,338 --> 00:57:06,713 There should be flowers in a vase. 1321 00:57:06,796 --> 00:57:08,755 (humming) 1322 00:57:08,838 --> 00:57:10,713 And I'm trying to get them just right. 1323 00:57:10,796 --> 00:57:13,213 And I cut one of the stems, but now it's too short. 1324 00:57:14,171 --> 00:57:15,713 Then I cut the others, but now they're too short and… 1325 00:57:15,796 --> 00:57:17,838 - I get it. - What do you think? 1326 00:57:17,921 --> 00:57:19,630 I think you're having a little bit of a breakdown. 1327 00:57:19,713 --> 00:57:21,130 I meant about the flowers. 1328 00:57:21,213 --> 00:57:23,880 Tell me what's happening now. 1329 00:57:23,963 --> 00:57:25,921 Why is this so hard to understand? 1330 00:57:26,005 --> 00:57:27,505 The dinner table isn't working, 1331 00:57:27,588 --> 00:57:28,963 - and we need it to. - Mm-hmm. 1332 00:57:29,046 --> 00:57:32,505 Right there are the building blocks of drama. 1333 00:57:37,796 --> 00:57:39,796 ♫ ♫ 1334 00:57:59,755 --> 00:58:01,171 Viv. 1335 00:58:02,630 --> 00:58:03,963 It's not you. 1336 00:58:04,046 --> 00:58:05,630 Or Bill. 1337 00:58:05,713 --> 00:58:08,546 The dinner scene. It's Donald Glass. 1338 00:58:08,630 --> 00:58:10,713 Well… (chuckles) 1339 00:58:10,796 --> 00:58:11,838 it'll be funny. 1340 00:58:11,921 --> 00:58:13,671 I'm sure of that. 1341 00:58:13,755 --> 00:58:16,130 Can't get better till it gets bad. 1342 00:58:16,213 --> 00:58:18,713 - Cross step one off the list. - Yeah. 1343 00:58:18,796 --> 00:58:19,880 Okay. 1344 00:58:21,421 --> 00:58:22,963 You hanging in there? 1345 00:58:23,046 --> 00:58:24,796 Look, we've made 37 episodes. 1346 00:58:24,880 --> 00:58:28,130 You do 37 of anything, one of them's gonna be your 37th best. 1347 00:58:28,213 --> 00:58:30,171 Ours was directed by Donald Glass. 1348 00:58:30,255 --> 00:58:32,088 Honey, the committee. 1349 00:58:32,171 --> 00:58:34,421 They're not gonna base their findings based on how this week's sh… 1350 00:58:34,505 --> 00:58:35,671 Fuck the committee. 1351 00:58:35,755 --> 00:58:37,880 I said that. I'm talking about the show. 1352 00:58:37,963 --> 00:58:40,963 And unless you count his wardrobe, Donald Glass doesn't understand 1353 00:58:41,046 --> 00:58:44,171 the moving parts of physical comedy. 1354 00:58:44,255 --> 00:58:45,380 (sighs) 1355 00:58:45,463 --> 00:58:46,463 That's all. 1356 00:58:46,546 --> 00:58:49,463 My point is you're not the problem. 1357 00:58:49,546 --> 00:58:50,838 Mm-hmm. 1358 00:58:52,380 --> 00:58:53,671 Luce. 1359 00:58:53,755 --> 00:58:55,171 Yeah? 1360 00:58:56,171 --> 00:58:58,088 (sighs) 1361 00:58:58,171 --> 00:59:01,921 Uh, Madelyn brought me breakfast this morning. 1362 00:59:02,005 --> 00:59:05,296 French toast, bacon and potatoes. 1363 00:59:05,380 --> 00:59:08,880 She said that someone noticed I hadn't had breakfast. 1364 00:59:08,963 --> 00:59:10,546 She said it looked like I had lost some weight. 1365 00:59:10,630 --> 00:59:12,046 She's right. You look great. 1366 00:59:12,130 --> 00:59:15,046 Madelyn's a staff writer. She doesn't bring people their breakfast. 1367 00:59:16,838 --> 00:59:18,380 I'm not sure what you're asking. 1368 00:59:18,463 --> 00:59:19,588 It sounds like she was… 1369 00:59:19,671 --> 00:59:22,088 How would she know I hadn't had breakfast? 1370 00:59:24,505 --> 00:59:25,630 I really don't know. 1371 00:59:26,713 --> 00:59:28,713 - It was you, right? - Yeah. 1372 00:59:28,796 --> 00:59:31,421 Got to give me credit. When I lie, I give it up pretty quick. 1373 00:59:31,505 --> 00:59:34,005 - It's admirable. - Thanks. 1374 00:59:34,088 --> 00:59:38,755 You told her to bring me breakfast and remark on my weight loss. 1375 00:59:39,838 --> 00:59:40,921 Let me explain why. 1376 00:59:41,005 --> 00:59:42,171 Why? 1377 00:59:42,255 --> 00:59:44,255 Because I think you should get off this loony diet you're on. 1378 00:59:44,338 --> 00:59:45,421 It's working. 1379 00:59:45,505 --> 00:59:46,921 It's not good for you. 1380 00:59:47,005 --> 00:59:48,130 I feel great. 1381 00:59:48,213 --> 00:59:49,880 It's not good for Ethel. 1382 00:59:49,963 --> 00:59:51,755 Ah, it's not. 1383 00:59:51,838 --> 00:59:54,255 We're best friends, Viv. I don't want to fight. 1384 00:59:54,338 --> 00:59:56,046 - I just sent some breakfast over because… -You didn't just send it over. 1385 00:59:56,130 --> 00:59:58,380 You sent it over with Madelyn and a message 1386 00:59:58,463 --> 01:00:01,963 and now a new message, which is that I look too good. 1387 01:00:02,046 --> 01:00:05,005 Because we want you at the weight you were when we cast you. 1388 01:00:05,088 --> 01:00:06,380 Otherwise it'll be bad for Ethel? 1389 01:00:06,463 --> 01:00:07,713 - Yes. - Or bad for you? 1390 01:00:11,713 --> 01:00:12,796 All right. 1391 01:00:12,880 --> 01:00:14,880 No one's gonna stop loving Lucy when you're pregnant. 1392 01:00:14,963 --> 01:00:16,296 You're not a pinup girl. 1393 01:00:18,130 --> 01:00:19,421 Thanks for that, Viv. 1394 01:00:19,505 --> 01:00:22,046 VIVIAN: I'm saying take it easy, that's all. 1395 01:00:22,130 --> 01:00:25,713 Everyone here stands shoulder to shoulder with you and no one feels funny 1396 01:00:25,796 --> 01:00:28,213 'cause we're scared to death, and you're not helping 1397 01:00:28,296 --> 01:00:30,713 by jumping up and down on everyone who works here 1398 01:00:30,796 --> 01:00:32,505 and doing it in front of the whole crew! 1399 01:00:32,588 --> 01:00:35,796 Goddamn it, Viv, most American women look like you, not me. 1400 01:00:35,880 --> 01:00:38,046 They want to see themselves on television. 1401 01:00:43,463 --> 01:00:45,171 (door opens) 1402 01:00:48,130 --> 01:00:50,463 What the hell are the two of you screaming about? 1403 01:00:50,546 --> 01:00:52,338 - LUCILLE: Nothing. - Nothing! 1404 01:00:52,421 --> 01:00:54,588 I'm in my room taking my midmorning nap. 1405 01:00:54,671 --> 01:00:57,296 VIVIAN: Don't you usually do that while we're rehearsing? 1406 01:00:58,296 --> 01:01:01,421 I'd love to hear more of that Moss Hart wit on the show. 1407 01:01:08,713 --> 01:01:10,796 VIVIAN: Don't worry about it. 1408 01:01:10,880 --> 01:01:13,588 The weight always comes back. I can't keep it off anymore. 1409 01:01:15,463 --> 01:01:17,338 This conversation went poorly. 1410 01:01:17,421 --> 01:01:19,338 I thought it was great. 1411 01:01:19,421 --> 01:01:23,921 I definitely feel like performing for tens of millions of people now. 1412 01:01:26,213 --> 01:01:28,088 All right. 1413 01:01:28,171 --> 01:01:29,880 - So… - (page turns) 1414 01:01:29,963 --> 01:01:31,380 Okay. 1415 01:01:32,380 --> 01:01:34,380 (thunder rumbling softly) 1416 01:01:36,546 --> 01:01:38,963 - Lucille. - Yeah? 1417 01:01:40,421 --> 01:01:42,130 Come with me for a drink. 1418 01:01:42,213 --> 01:01:43,630 It's 10:00 a.m. 1419 01:01:43,713 --> 01:01:45,505 I'm sure it's 10:15 somewhere. 1420 01:01:45,588 --> 01:01:47,255 We have to be back onstage. 1421 01:01:47,338 --> 01:01:49,046 - I wonder if they'll wait for you. - Bill, I'm not… 1422 01:01:49,130 --> 01:01:50,296 Kid. 1423 01:01:50,380 --> 01:01:52,671 Tell the stage Mrs. Arnaz is taking some personal time 1424 01:01:52,755 --> 01:01:54,130 and she'll be back when she's back. 1425 01:01:54,213 --> 01:01:56,380 - Probably 15 minutes. - Yes, ma'am. 1426 01:01:56,463 --> 01:01:59,046 And you should remind props that I need garden shears in the opening scene. 1427 01:01:59,130 --> 01:02:00,546 - Copy. - WILLIAM: Let's go. 1428 01:02:00,630 --> 01:02:02,838 We have to establish right away that I'm setting a fancy table. 1429 01:02:02,921 --> 01:02:04,713 - You don't have to explain it to him. - We'll have flowers in a vase. 1430 01:02:04,796 --> 01:02:06,296 I'll cut one of the flowers. 1431 01:02:06,380 --> 01:02:08,296 - He doesn't care. - It'll be too short. 1432 01:02:08,380 --> 01:02:10,338 I'll cut the other flowers, they'll be too short, and so on. 1433 01:02:10,421 --> 01:02:11,880 - Got it. - So I need garden shears. 1434 01:02:11,963 --> 01:02:12,963 Copy. 1435 01:02:13,046 --> 01:02:15,255 Regular scissors aren't strong enough to cut through the stems. 1436 01:02:15,338 --> 01:02:17,213 He's thinking a lot about killing you now. 1437 01:02:17,296 --> 01:02:18,296 - Fine. - Go. 1438 01:02:18,380 --> 01:02:20,005 Yep. 1439 01:02:20,088 --> 01:02:21,713 (rain falling) 1440 01:02:21,796 --> 01:02:23,296 It's raining. 1441 01:02:23,380 --> 01:02:24,588 - Your hair gonna be all right? - (thunder rumbling) 1442 01:02:24,671 --> 01:02:26,046 I'm fine. 1443 01:02:26,130 --> 01:02:30,255 Ever since I started doing this show, rain bounces off my hair. 1444 01:02:30,338 --> 01:02:32,171 - That's helpful. - Mm. 1445 01:02:32,255 --> 01:02:34,963 Honestly had no idea this place was here. 1446 01:02:35,046 --> 01:02:37,630 WILLIAM: They like to keep a low profile. 1447 01:02:37,713 --> 01:02:39,796 LUCILLE: Can't imagine why. 1448 01:02:39,880 --> 01:02:43,171 Kind of people go to a bar on a Wednesday morning? 1449 01:02:43,255 --> 01:02:45,505 WILLIAM: It's an eclectic group. 1450 01:02:45,588 --> 01:02:48,213 - What are you having? - (“Junker's Blues” playing over radio) 1451 01:02:48,296 --> 01:02:50,088 LUCILLE: I'll take a tetanus shot. 1452 01:02:50,171 --> 01:02:52,088 - Jim Beam, two times. - BARTENDER: Sure, Bill. 1453 01:02:52,171 --> 01:02:54,213 (sighs) I thought you and Desi had a deal. 1454 01:02:54,296 --> 01:02:56,796 You don't drink at work. 1455 01:02:56,880 --> 01:02:59,421 Desi and I have a deal that I won't be drunk at work. 1456 01:02:59,505 --> 01:03:01,630 Have you ever seen me drunk at work? 1457 01:03:01,713 --> 01:03:03,713 - Would I know? - No. 1458 01:03:03,796 --> 01:03:04,963 Here's to your new baby. 1459 01:03:05,046 --> 01:03:06,463 All right, then. 1460 01:03:07,755 --> 01:03:09,921 Are they being polite or do they not recognize us? 1461 01:03:10,005 --> 01:03:11,588 They don't own television sets. 1462 01:03:13,088 --> 01:03:14,421 Why didn't I think of that? 1463 01:03:14,505 --> 01:03:16,838 Honey, I read seven newspapers every day. 1464 01:03:16,921 --> 01:03:18,838 Seven? When do you have time to do that? 1465 01:03:18,921 --> 01:03:21,671 It's 30 minutes between races at Santa Anita, 1466 01:03:21,755 --> 01:03:23,713 and it takes me a minute and a half to pick a horse. 1467 01:03:23,796 --> 01:03:25,338 - Aren't you at work? - Yeah. 1468 01:03:25,421 --> 01:03:28,296 We have bookies now and telephones. 1469 01:03:28,380 --> 01:03:31,088 Know all about that. Did a Damon Runyon picture. 1470 01:03:31,171 --> 01:03:33,005 In none of those seven newspapers 1471 01:03:33,088 --> 01:03:36,963 have I read anything about Lucille Ball being a Communist. 1472 01:03:38,421 --> 01:03:40,796 I don't hear anyone talking about it. 1473 01:03:40,880 --> 01:03:42,463 Since when do you talk to anyone? 1474 01:03:42,546 --> 01:03:44,963 I got news for you; the less you talk, the more things you hear, 1475 01:03:45,046 --> 01:03:46,880 and I haven't heard anything. 1476 01:03:46,963 --> 01:03:48,921 So… 1477 01:03:49,005 --> 01:03:50,213 problems at home? 1478 01:03:51,755 --> 01:03:53,421 Problems at home? 1479 01:03:53,505 --> 01:03:55,546 - Yeah. - No. 1480 01:03:55,630 --> 01:04:00,296 I'd like very much to have problems at home, but my problem's not home that much. 1481 01:04:00,380 --> 01:04:01,463 Few times a week. 1482 01:04:01,546 --> 01:04:02,713 He was playing cards on the boat Wednesday night. 1483 01:04:02,796 --> 01:04:04,130 I know. 1484 01:04:04,213 --> 01:04:05,463 The picture's six months old. 1485 01:04:05,546 --> 01:04:07,963 I was there when it was taken. 1486 01:04:08,046 --> 01:04:10,546 I'm saying, why wasn't he home, where I and our daughter were? 1487 01:04:10,630 --> 01:04:14,880 Your husband is in love with America like no man I have ever known 1488 01:04:14,963 --> 01:04:19,588 since George M. Cohan, who loved America so much he wrote the same song five times. 1489 01:04:19,671 --> 01:04:20,713 Okay? 1490 01:04:20,796 --> 01:04:24,213 Desi loves America as much as that guy. 1491 01:04:24,296 --> 01:04:26,505 But that doesn't mean he's not Cuban. 1492 01:04:26,588 --> 01:04:28,213 - I know that. - The world he's from 1493 01:04:28,296 --> 01:04:30,921 has a very narrow definition of manhood. 1494 01:04:31,005 --> 01:04:33,296 - I know that, too. - The man is the man. 1495 01:04:33,380 --> 01:04:34,421 Mm-hmm. 1496 01:04:34,505 --> 01:04:36,338 And not for nothing, but the women are happy. 1497 01:04:36,421 --> 01:04:38,213 (scoffs softly) You've asked them? 1498 01:04:38,296 --> 01:04:40,005 They look happy. 1499 01:04:41,088 --> 01:04:42,505 I see. 1500 01:04:44,088 --> 01:04:46,130 - But that's neither here nor there. - It really isn't. 1501 01:04:46,213 --> 01:04:49,338 He's mesmerized by you, Lucille. 1502 01:04:49,421 --> 01:04:52,505 And he misses you when you're in two different places. 1503 01:04:52,588 --> 01:04:54,713 He does. I'm a witness. 1504 01:04:54,796 --> 01:04:56,338 - He doesn't have to. - He… 1505 01:04:56,421 --> 01:04:57,671 We live in the same house. 1506 01:04:57,755 --> 01:04:59,630 He does have to. 1507 01:04:59,713 --> 01:05:00,963 That's what I'm saying. 1508 01:05:02,796 --> 01:05:07,088 He has to spend time away from you so that he can feel like he's not the… 1509 01:05:07,171 --> 01:05:08,463 Second banana. 1510 01:05:08,546 --> 01:05:11,171 I navigate male egos for a living, bud. 1511 01:05:11,255 --> 01:05:13,338 Then why are you running the set? 1512 01:05:13,421 --> 01:05:15,963 Why are you running rehearsals? 1513 01:05:16,046 --> 01:05:17,671 You're doing it right in front of him. 1514 01:05:17,755 --> 01:05:20,463 I can't prioritize the director's feelings over the health of the show. 1515 01:05:20,546 --> 01:05:23,505 No, no, not– I couldn't care less about Donald's feelings if I tried hard. 1516 01:05:23,588 --> 01:05:24,671 He's a hack. 1517 01:05:24,755 --> 01:05:28,921 But we'll overcome that because, frankly, we're not doing Uncle Vanya. 1518 01:05:30,296 --> 01:05:31,505 Got it. 1519 01:05:31,588 --> 01:05:33,255 But the business at the dinner table has to be precise. 1520 01:05:33,338 --> 01:05:35,088 Really? 1521 01:05:35,171 --> 01:05:36,713 I was only in vaudeville 40 years, 1522 01:05:36,796 --> 01:05:39,380 so I wouldn't know about these things of which you speak. 1523 01:05:39,463 --> 01:05:40,505 I know you know. 1524 01:05:40,588 --> 01:05:41,755 I'm just saying… 1525 01:05:41,838 --> 01:05:44,630 You did it in front of Desi is my point. 1526 01:05:45,838 --> 01:05:47,505 Let me tell you something about Desi. 1527 01:05:47,588 --> 01:05:49,421 He runs this show. 1528 01:05:50,505 --> 01:05:53,005 Every creative decision goes through him. 1529 01:05:53,088 --> 01:05:56,088 Every business decision– the network, Philip Morris. 1530 01:05:56,171 --> 01:05:58,921 And if that wasn't enough, he is camera-ready on Monday. 1531 01:05:59,005 --> 01:06:02,546 Takes me five days to get a laugh. 1532 01:06:02,630 --> 01:06:04,463 He's killing it at the table read. 1533 01:06:04,546 --> 01:06:06,463 (chuckles softly) 1534 01:06:06,546 --> 01:06:09,713 And that man, believe me, is nobody's second banana. 1535 01:06:11,088 --> 01:06:12,671 How many people know that? 1536 01:06:12,755 --> 01:06:14,046 Know what? 1537 01:06:14,130 --> 01:06:16,463 That Desi runs the show. 1538 01:06:16,546 --> 01:06:18,546 How many people know that? 1539 01:06:23,255 --> 01:06:24,880 OLDER MADELYN: There was a minute there 1540 01:06:24,963 --> 01:06:28,130 when Lucy was gonna be a serious actress. 1541 01:06:28,213 --> 01:06:29,713 In serious movies. 1542 01:06:29,796 --> 01:06:33,588 She was gonna compete for roles with Crawford, Hayworth. 1543 01:06:35,213 --> 01:06:37,380 Might've been Lucy in All About Eve. 1544 01:06:37,463 --> 01:06:41,046 And you know what? She'd have blown the doors off the place. 1545 01:06:42,296 --> 01:06:44,880 It was almost like that. 1546 01:06:44,963 --> 01:06:46,255 For a minute there. 1547 01:06:46,338 --> 01:06:48,338 ♫ ♫ 1548 01:06:55,671 --> 01:06:57,255 Desi! 1549 01:06:58,713 --> 01:07:00,713 (tuning guitar) 1550 01:07:01,713 --> 01:07:02,713 Desi! 1551 01:07:02,796 --> 01:07:04,130 (pants, grunts) 1552 01:07:04,213 --> 01:07:05,213 Lucy? 1553 01:07:05,296 --> 01:07:06,421 What happened? 1554 01:07:06,505 --> 01:07:08,671 (panting) 1555 01:07:08,755 --> 01:07:10,255 Flat tire! 1556 01:07:10,338 --> 01:07:11,963 Quarter of a mile back. 1557 01:07:12,046 --> 01:07:14,130 And you abandoned the car there? 1558 01:07:14,213 --> 01:07:16,671 - I sprinted the last 500 yards. - What's going on? 1559 01:07:16,755 --> 01:07:19,171 Also you ran with a bottle of champagne in your hand? 1560 01:07:19,255 --> 01:07:21,630 (breathlessly) Bringing it… 1561 01:07:22,880 --> 01:07:23,963 …more festive. 1562 01:07:24,046 --> 01:07:25,046 I got it. 1563 01:07:25,130 --> 01:07:26,588 I got the part. 1564 01:07:26,671 --> 01:07:28,671 - Which part? - I got the part, Des. 1565 01:07:28,755 --> 01:07:30,130 The Big Street. 1566 01:07:30,213 --> 01:07:32,296 You said it was going to Rita Hayworth. 1567 01:07:32,380 --> 01:07:33,796 Scheduling problems. 1568 01:07:33,880 --> 01:07:35,463 Then they went to Judy Holliday. 1569 01:07:35,546 --> 01:07:37,380 Scheduling problems. 1570 01:07:37,463 --> 01:07:41,713 I got the female lead in The Big Street. 1571 01:07:41,796 --> 01:07:43,963 That's tremendous. 1572 01:07:44,963 --> 01:07:46,046 That's tremendous. 1573 01:07:46,130 --> 01:07:49,005 I'm opposite Henry Fonda. 1574 01:07:49,088 --> 01:07:51,880 But when does it start photography? 1575 01:07:51,963 --> 01:07:52,963 Two weeks. 1576 01:07:53,046 --> 01:07:54,671 (panting continues) 1577 01:07:54,755 --> 01:07:56,921 - I still can't catch my breath. - (groans) 1578 01:07:58,213 --> 01:08:00,213 - It's Damon Runyon. - I know! 1579 01:08:00,296 --> 01:08:03,046 I know. I read the script, and I'm very, I'm very happy, Lucy, 1580 01:08:03,130 --> 01:08:05,463 but I was looking forward to you coming out on tour. 1581 01:08:07,255 --> 01:08:09,380 Rita Hayworth had scheduling problems. 1582 01:08:09,463 --> 01:08:11,796 Mm, so did you. 1583 01:08:11,880 --> 01:08:15,130 You don't think I want to be in the same city at the same time as my husband? 1584 01:08:15,213 --> 01:08:16,713 - I know. I know. - What do I– 1585 01:08:16,796 --> 01:08:18,963 Every decision I make is based on being near you. 1586 01:08:19,046 --> 01:08:20,921 Every single decision. 1587 01:08:21,005 --> 01:08:24,463 Well, yes, but obviously not every single decision. 1588 01:08:24,546 --> 01:08:26,963 - No? Hmm? - (sighs) 1589 01:08:27,046 --> 01:08:29,505 You know how many years I've spent sticking my head into frame, 1590 01:08:29,588 --> 01:08:31,421 saying something bitchy and going away? 1591 01:08:31,505 --> 01:08:34,921 Crappy little roles in pictures I wouldn't pay a nickel to see 1592 01:08:35,005 --> 01:08:37,921 if the theater had the only available air-conditioning. 1593 01:08:38,005 --> 01:08:40,421 - Uh-huh. - If The Big Street is a hit, 1594 01:08:40,505 --> 01:08:45,255 I'll be getting the roles that go to Rita and Judy and Bette. 1595 01:08:45,338 --> 01:08:46,338 Which Judy? 1596 01:08:46,421 --> 01:08:47,505 - Holliday. - Ah. 1597 01:08:47,588 --> 01:08:49,296 Who's the baseball player that you talk about? 1598 01:08:49,380 --> 01:08:52,505 The one who sat down and let Lou Gehrig start that streak. 1599 01:08:52,588 --> 01:08:54,005 Oh, Wally Pipp. 1600 01:08:54,088 --> 01:08:55,880 Gehrig was his understudy. 1601 01:08:55,963 --> 01:08:58,421 - Backup. - And the guy took a rest one day. 1602 01:08:58,505 --> 01:09:00,921 Gehrig came in, didn't come out for 40 years. 1603 01:09:01,005 --> 01:09:02,421 14 years, and it was Wally Pipp. 1604 01:09:02,505 --> 01:09:05,171 Okay, well, imagine if Wally Pipp had scheduling problems, 1605 01:09:05,255 --> 01:09:09,838 Lou Gehrig, instead of grabbing his glove, toured with his husband's Latin orchestra. 1606 01:09:09,921 --> 01:09:11,463 It would've changed the course of baseball. 1607 01:09:11,546 --> 01:09:13,671 - And the course of Latin music. - (sighs) 1608 01:09:13,755 --> 01:09:15,546 Rita Hayworth is Wally Pipp. 1609 01:09:15,630 --> 01:09:16,796 I'm Lou Gehrig. 1610 01:09:16,880 --> 01:09:18,505 The Big Street is the Yankees. 1611 01:09:18,588 --> 01:09:20,963 I understood the metaphor so long ago. 1612 01:09:22,505 --> 01:09:25,088 You don't have to tour. You could stay in town. 1613 01:09:26,505 --> 01:09:29,338 - And do what? - Sell out Ciro's every night. 1614 01:09:29,421 --> 01:09:31,213 ♫ ♫ 1615 01:09:31,296 --> 01:09:34,130 We're not a house band. 1616 01:09:34,213 --> 01:09:36,421 I'd like to sell out New York. 1617 01:09:36,505 --> 01:09:39,296 I'd like to sell out Chicago and Miami, too. 1618 01:09:39,380 --> 01:09:41,213 - I know. - Hmm. 1619 01:09:41,296 --> 01:09:42,963 Eight weeks. 1620 01:09:43,046 --> 01:09:45,421 I'll come wherever you are on the weekends. 1621 01:09:46,630 --> 01:09:48,713 So it'll be important that you not fall in love with someone else 1622 01:09:48,796 --> 01:09:50,213 Mondays through Fridays. 1623 01:09:50,296 --> 01:09:52,213 Agreed. 1624 01:09:52,296 --> 01:09:53,963 Should we open the champagne, take our clothes off 1625 01:09:54,046 --> 01:09:55,463 and go skinny-dipping in the pool? 1626 01:09:55,546 --> 01:09:57,755 That bottle of champagne is basically a grenade now, 1627 01:09:57,838 --> 01:09:59,588 but all your other ideas were good. 1628 01:09:59,671 --> 01:10:02,880 Lucy, Lucy, Jesus. 1629 01:10:02,963 --> 01:10:04,213 Wow. 1630 01:10:04,296 --> 01:10:05,671 You're gonna be a movie star. 1631 01:10:07,505 --> 01:10:09,713 You comfortable with that? 1632 01:10:10,963 --> 01:10:13,463 Am I comfortable with that? 1633 01:10:23,505 --> 01:10:25,546 That bottle has comic timing. 1634 01:10:26,546 --> 01:10:28,546 ♫ ♫ 1635 01:10:36,380 --> 01:10:38,755 I've been at the studio for almost ten years. 1636 01:10:38,838 --> 01:10:40,505 I've never been in the president's office. 1637 01:10:40,588 --> 01:10:43,713 Mr. Koerner isn't the president. He's the head of production. 1638 01:10:44,796 --> 01:10:46,880 Second in command. 1639 01:10:46,963 --> 01:10:48,588 Still higher than I've ever gotten. 1640 01:10:48,671 --> 01:10:51,130 (intercom buzzes) 1641 01:10:51,213 --> 01:10:53,046 - Yes, sir. - KOERNER: Send her in. 1642 01:10:53,130 --> 01:10:54,296 You can go on in. 1643 01:10:59,671 --> 01:11:01,380 - Lucille. - (sighs) 1644 01:11:01,463 --> 01:11:03,630 - Charles Koerner. - Lucille Ball. (chuckles) 1645 01:11:03,713 --> 01:11:05,421 You like Lucille or Lucy? 1646 01:11:05,505 --> 01:11:07,130 Lucy's fine. I mean either's fine. 1647 01:11:07,213 --> 01:11:08,755 - Lucy. - All right. 1648 01:11:08,838 --> 01:11:10,713 And do I call you Charlie? 1649 01:11:10,796 --> 01:11:12,796 Anyone as brilliant as you were in The Big Street 1650 01:11:12,880 --> 01:11:14,588 can call me Betsy and I wouldn't care. 1651 01:11:14,671 --> 01:11:16,255 (laughs) Thank you. 1652 01:11:16,338 --> 01:11:18,338 Please, sit. Sit here. 1653 01:11:19,588 --> 01:11:20,588 (Lucille sighs) 1654 01:11:21,630 --> 01:11:23,213 Thank you. 1655 01:11:23,296 --> 01:11:24,338 (sighs heavily) 1656 01:11:24,421 --> 01:11:27,380 That was a whole new side of you we've never seen. 1657 01:11:27,463 --> 01:11:28,630 Where's that been? 1658 01:11:28,713 --> 01:11:30,880 - It's been buried under bad movies. - (laughs) 1659 01:11:30,963 --> 01:11:33,588 I've heard you make some form of that joke before. 1660 01:11:33,671 --> 01:11:37,005 Keep putting me in pictures like The Big Street, you won't hear it again. 1661 01:11:39,296 --> 01:11:41,380 We're dropping your contract, Lucy. 1662 01:11:41,463 --> 01:11:43,505 (laughs) 1663 01:11:43,588 --> 01:11:45,588 - No, it-it's not a joke. - That was… 1664 01:11:47,505 --> 01:11:50,005 RKO is dropping your contract. 1665 01:11:52,296 --> 01:11:53,880 I don't understand. 1666 01:11:55,005 --> 01:11:57,005 We don't have anything for you. 1667 01:11:59,255 --> 01:12:01,463 But that… 1668 01:12:01,546 --> 01:12:02,838 (exhales sharply) 1669 01:12:06,088 --> 01:12:07,671 This is happening fast. 1670 01:12:07,755 --> 01:12:08,921 The Big Street was a hit. 1671 01:12:09,005 --> 01:12:10,588 It was a critical hit. 1672 01:12:10,671 --> 01:12:12,630 I get that there wasn't a stampede to the box office, 1673 01:12:12,713 --> 01:12:14,005 but you didn't lose money, did you? 1674 01:12:14,088 --> 01:12:16,255 - No. - Do you understand the conditions 1675 01:12:16,338 --> 01:12:18,588 under which this picture was finished? 1676 01:12:18,671 --> 01:12:19,796 No, it has nothing to do with conditions… 1677 01:12:19,880 --> 01:12:22,630 Damon Runyon left town before principal photography, 1678 01:12:22,713 --> 01:12:25,796 our director joined the Army during postproduction, 1679 01:12:25,880 --> 01:12:28,838 and our editor died. 1680 01:12:28,921 --> 01:12:31,088 He just flat-out died. 1681 01:12:31,171 --> 01:12:33,463 - There were a number of obstacles. - That's accurate. 1682 01:12:33,546 --> 01:12:35,671 - Did you read the reviews? - They were very impressive. 1683 01:12:35,755 --> 01:12:37,046 They were more than impressive. 1684 01:12:37,130 --> 01:12:40,005 This has nothing to do with your performance in The Big Street. 1685 01:12:40,088 --> 01:12:43,130 But it should have everything to do with my performance in The Big Street. 1686 01:12:43,213 --> 01:12:47,671 I… I showed what I can do, and that's just the beginning of what I can do. 1687 01:12:47,755 --> 01:12:49,463 That is just the beginning of it. 1688 01:12:49,546 --> 01:12:51,838 (Lucille sighs) 1689 01:12:52,921 --> 01:12:54,671 Are you sure this isn't a joke? 1690 01:12:54,755 --> 01:12:56,380 It's a tough business. 1691 01:12:56,463 --> 01:12:57,505 I know that! 1692 01:12:57,588 --> 01:12:59,671 I've been in it since I was 14! 1693 01:12:59,755 --> 01:13:01,380 But you're 35 now. 1694 01:13:03,421 --> 01:13:05,463 - And that is the problem? - No. 1695 01:13:05,546 --> 01:13:08,630 The problem is you're really 39, aren't you? 1696 01:13:10,046 --> 01:13:11,338 Hmm. 1697 01:13:11,421 --> 01:13:15,005 39-year-olds don't go to see your movies? 1698 01:13:16,088 --> 01:13:18,380 They don't want to see stories about themselves? 1699 01:13:18,463 --> 01:13:22,505 You came through for us when Judy Holliday and Rita Hayworth were on other pictures, 1700 01:13:22,588 --> 01:13:24,880 and we didn't want to lose Fonda. 1701 01:13:24,963 --> 01:13:28,338 Now, this studio has a handshake understanding with Metro and Warner, 1702 01:13:28,421 --> 01:13:31,088 and they'll loan us Holliday or Hayworth, 1703 01:13:31,171 --> 01:13:35,505 so we just don't have enough for you to warrant keeping you under contract. 1704 01:13:35,588 --> 01:13:38,546 Judy Holliday does one thing very well, but it's just one thing. 1705 01:13:38,630 --> 01:13:40,338 I know how you're feeling right now. 1706 01:13:40,421 --> 01:13:43,713 I've had to have this conversation a hundred times. 1707 01:13:43,796 --> 01:13:46,421 I'm surprised because you're terrible at it. 1708 01:13:47,880 --> 01:13:49,296 Can I make a suggestion? 1709 01:13:50,880 --> 01:13:52,171 Radio. 1710 01:13:53,796 --> 01:13:55,380 The hell did you just say to me? 1711 01:13:55,463 --> 01:13:57,338 You've got the voice for it. 1712 01:13:57,421 --> 01:13:59,838 Look, I've noticed there's a lot you can do with your voice. 1713 01:13:59,921 --> 01:14:02,213 You should think about radio, Lucy. 1714 01:14:05,546 --> 01:14:07,838 And you should go fuck yourself, Betsy. 1715 01:14:07,921 --> 01:14:09,921 ♫ ♫ 1716 01:14:11,255 --> 01:14:13,255 (crickets chirping) 1717 01:14:22,921 --> 01:14:24,213 (sighs softly) 1718 01:14:27,921 --> 01:14:29,421 DESI: Lucy? 1719 01:14:30,713 --> 01:14:32,421 What are you doing? 1720 01:14:32,505 --> 01:14:34,630 I'm reading scripts. 1721 01:14:36,171 --> 01:14:39,380 Oh, it's 3:00 in the morning. 1722 01:14:39,463 --> 01:14:41,713 I know. 1723 01:14:41,796 --> 01:14:43,588 I'm drunk, too. 1724 01:14:44,588 --> 01:14:46,255 I know why you like drinking. 1725 01:14:46,338 --> 01:14:49,088 I didn't get it till about two hours ago. 1726 01:14:50,880 --> 01:14:52,880 You read any good movies? 1727 01:14:52,963 --> 01:14:55,296 These are radio pilots. 1728 01:14:55,380 --> 01:14:57,255 Oh, yeah? 1729 01:14:57,338 --> 01:14:58,380 Yeah. 1730 01:14:58,463 --> 01:15:01,630 There's nothing wrong with radio. 1731 01:15:01,713 --> 01:15:02,963 I do it all the time. 1732 01:15:03,046 --> 01:15:04,880 You're a bandleader. 1733 01:15:17,088 --> 01:15:19,380 You know, Bataan was a hit, too. 1734 01:15:20,546 --> 01:15:21,630 I didn't hear you. 1735 01:15:21,713 --> 01:15:23,755 Bataan was a hit. 1736 01:15:23,838 --> 01:15:26,213 I was good. 1737 01:15:26,296 --> 01:15:29,046 The reviews were valentines, and I didn't bang a drum. 1738 01:15:30,130 --> 01:15:32,255 It would have led to better parts, except I had to go to– 1739 01:15:32,338 --> 01:15:34,171 what do you call it?– 1740 01:15:34,255 --> 01:15:37,046 fight World War II. 1741 01:15:39,421 --> 01:15:42,546 And now those crappy little parts in pictures you wouldn't pay a nickel to see 1742 01:15:42,630 --> 01:15:45,713 - if it was the only available air-conditioning in the… -Des. 1743 01:15:45,796 --> 01:15:47,796 I can't get them. 1744 01:15:53,171 --> 01:15:55,171 ♫ ♫ 1745 01:15:57,338 --> 01:15:58,755 (sighs softly) 1746 01:16:13,421 --> 01:16:15,588 DESI: Gee, honey, are you sure those bandages are fake? 1747 01:16:15,671 --> 01:16:18,005 - Oh, yeah. - Are you sure you're all right? 1748 01:16:18,088 --> 01:16:20,546 - Yeah, honey, I'm fine. - Oh, yeah– oh, let me help you. 1749 01:16:20,630 --> 01:16:21,630 (groans) Oh. 1750 01:16:21,713 --> 01:16:24,713 It's a good thing the Mertzes had their awning up. 1751 01:16:24,796 --> 01:16:26,213 - Oh, honey. - (groans) 1752 01:16:26,296 --> 01:16:28,588 It was all my fault. 1753 01:16:28,671 --> 01:16:30,963 No, it was my fault, honey. 1754 01:16:31,046 --> 01:16:32,255 Weren't we silly? 1755 01:16:32,338 --> 01:16:34,005 DESI: Yes. We will never argue again. 1756 01:16:34,088 --> 01:16:36,088 Ah, baby. 1757 01:16:37,380 --> 01:16:40,463 - Lucy, are you okay?! - Yeah, I'm fine. 1758 01:16:40,546 --> 01:16:41,963 - You sure? - I'm sure. 1759 01:16:42,046 --> 01:16:43,505 WILLIAM: Thank goodness you're all right. 1760 01:16:43,588 --> 01:16:44,838 LUCILLE: Why? What's the matter? 1761 01:16:44,921 --> 01:16:47,130 When I told Ethel the whole gag was my idea, 1762 01:16:47,213 --> 01:16:48,880 she got mad and went home to her mother. 1763 01:16:48,963 --> 01:16:50,546 - Oh…! - Oh, no. 1764 01:16:50,630 --> 01:16:52,255 DONALD: And we cut. Good. 1765 01:16:52,338 --> 01:16:53,546 - Is that lunch? - (indistinct chatter) 1766 01:16:53,630 --> 01:16:54,963 That's one hour for lunch! 1767 01:16:55,046 --> 01:16:57,255 We'll do notes onstage after and go again. 1768 01:16:57,338 --> 01:16:59,213 Uh, one quick thing. 1769 01:16:59,296 --> 01:17:00,630 The table scene is getting good. 1770 01:17:00,713 --> 01:17:01,713 Yeah, it's not. 1771 01:17:01,796 --> 01:17:03,546 I wanted to circle back again and express 1772 01:17:03,630 --> 01:17:06,463 my serious concern about Ricky's entrance at the top. 1773 01:17:06,546 --> 01:17:09,213 I brought it up at the table read Monday. There haven't been new pages. 1774 01:17:09,296 --> 01:17:11,088 - Because it's gonna work. - Hear me out. 1775 01:17:11,171 --> 01:17:12,671 - Okay. - Right now, 1776 01:17:12,755 --> 01:17:14,421 Lucy is trimming the flowers on the table. 1777 01:17:14,505 --> 01:17:16,421 Ricky opens the door and comes in. 1778 01:17:16,505 --> 01:17:18,171 We're gonna have to cut the flowers. 1779 01:17:18,255 --> 01:17:21,005 I don't mean “cut the flowers.” I mean cut the flowers. 1780 01:17:21,088 --> 01:17:23,838 I couldn't understand the difference between those two line readings. 1781 01:17:23,921 --> 01:17:26,255 We're running long. We have to cut the bit with the flowers. 1782 01:17:26,338 --> 01:17:27,463 How long? 1783 01:17:27,546 --> 01:17:28,796 About a minute. 1784 01:17:28,880 --> 01:17:31,130 All right, well, we'll get back to the flowers. 1785 01:17:31,213 --> 01:17:33,546 The front door opens, Ricky comes in. 1786 01:17:33,630 --> 01:17:35,338 Lucy doesn't see or hear him, which is unusual 1787 01:17:35,421 --> 01:17:37,213 because the front door is, you know, 1788 01:17:37,296 --> 01:17:38,588 - right there. - Mm-hmm. 1789 01:17:38,671 --> 01:17:40,296 And in previous episodes, we've established 1790 01:17:40,380 --> 01:17:42,255 Lucy's eyes and ears are connected to her brain. 1791 01:17:42,338 --> 01:17:44,088 We-we buy the conceit. 1792 01:17:44,171 --> 01:17:46,505 - I'm sorry? - We buy it. 1793 01:17:46,588 --> 01:17:49,505 Lucy is so focused on making the table nice 1794 01:17:49,588 --> 01:17:51,713 she doesn't even notice Ricky coming in the door. 1795 01:17:51,796 --> 01:17:53,505 - Okay, I'll run with that. - Yeah. 1796 01:17:53,588 --> 01:17:55,213 Ricky walks up to her quietly. 1797 01:17:55,296 --> 01:17:57,796 He puts his hands over her eyes and says… 1798 01:17:57,880 --> 01:17:59,505 “Guess who it is.” 1799 01:17:59,588 --> 01:18:03,130 - And then Lucy says, “Bill? Sam? Pat? Ralph?” -Yeah. 1800 01:18:03,213 --> 01:18:04,671 - She's teasing him. - Yes, she's teasing him. 1801 01:18:04,755 --> 01:18:06,213 That's clear. Ricky responds… 1802 01:18:06,296 --> 01:18:07,588 - “No.” - “No.” 1803 01:18:07,671 --> 01:18:10,880 And the stage direction for Ricky says “burning.” 1804 01:18:10,963 --> 01:18:11,963 “No!” 1805 01:18:12,046 --> 01:18:13,338 He's upset. 1806 01:18:13,421 --> 01:18:14,838 Lucy continues the teasing. 1807 01:18:14,921 --> 01:18:16,755 “George? Julius? Stephen? Ivan?” 1808 01:18:16,838 --> 01:18:18,338 - Yeah. - We changed that to 1809 01:18:18,421 --> 01:18:19,713 “Pedro? Julio? Juan? Guillermo?” 1810 01:18:19,796 --> 01:18:21,255 MADELYN: “Because those are Spanish names. 1811 01:18:21,338 --> 01:18:23,713 “I mean Mexican. Cuban. Latin. 1812 01:18:23,796 --> 01:18:25,213 “They're Brazilian names. 1813 01:18:25,296 --> 01:18:27,380 Turkish.” - You done? 1814 01:18:27,399 --> 01:18:27,611 Yeah. 1815 01:18:27,635 --> 01:18:28,296 ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: We're moving into a meal penalty. 1816 01:18:28,380 --> 01:18:29,505 Yeah, okay. 1817 01:18:29,588 --> 01:18:30,963 LUCILLE: Lucy guesses some names. 1818 01:18:31,046 --> 01:18:32,171 Yeah, teasingly. 1819 01:18:32,255 --> 01:18:36,963 And the script indicates that Ricky takes his hands away from Lucy's eyes, 1820 01:18:37,046 --> 01:18:38,546 turns her around and says… 1821 01:18:38,630 --> 01:18:42,046 - “No, it's me.” - So my question again, Jess; 1822 01:18:42,130 --> 01:18:46,421 Does Ricky honestly, truly believe that there might be eight different men 1823 01:18:46,505 --> 01:18:51,755 who routinely walk into their apartment, all of whom sound exactly like Desi Arnaz? 1824 01:18:52,838 --> 01:18:54,671 You think we're saying Ricky's stupid? 1825 01:18:54,755 --> 01:18:56,630 I think you're saying the audience is. 1826 01:18:56,713 --> 01:18:59,421 And that's something for which they won't soon forgive you. 1827 01:18:59,505 --> 01:19:01,296 You charge for these lessons? 1828 01:19:01,380 --> 01:19:02,421 A ton. 1829 01:19:02,505 --> 01:19:05,880 For the sake of the joke, the audience will take the leap with us. 1830 01:19:05,963 --> 01:19:08,838 They will, but you'll need a busload of orthopedists when they land. 1831 01:19:08,921 --> 01:19:09,921 ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: Jess. 1832 01:19:10,005 --> 01:19:11,713 Let's talk about this after lunch, huh? 1833 01:19:11,796 --> 01:19:13,671 - I have an idea. - I got a crew here, 1834 01:19:13,755 --> 01:19:15,130 and we're about to run into a penalty, so… 1835 01:19:15,213 --> 01:19:18,338 - Lucy is working on the flowers. - We're cutting the flowers for time. 1836 01:19:18,421 --> 01:19:19,838 I don't mean literally cutting the flowers in the scene… 1837 01:19:19,921 --> 01:19:21,588 I cannot go through that again. 1838 01:19:21,671 --> 01:19:23,213 Ricky opens the door, comes in, 1839 01:19:23,296 --> 01:19:26,421 shuts the door, as we've seen him do in 37 episodes. 1840 01:19:26,505 --> 01:19:28,255 Lucy doesn't acknowledge him. 1841 01:19:28,338 --> 01:19:30,046 - Uh, so far, you're describing the script. - Right. 1842 01:19:30,130 --> 01:19:32,380 But instead of playing the hands-over-the-eyes guessing game, 1843 01:19:32,463 --> 01:19:34,338 Ricky just stands there. 1844 01:19:34,421 --> 01:19:37,838 He can't understand why Lucy doesn't notice he's home any more than we can. 1845 01:19:37,921 --> 01:19:41,213 He stands there for a full beat, and then another, 1846 01:19:41,296 --> 01:19:45,088 and then merrily, in a slightly exaggerated manner, 1847 01:19:45,171 --> 01:19:48,213 as we've heard him do a hundred times, he says… 1848 01:19:48,296 --> 01:19:50,255 “Lucy, I'm home!” 1849 01:19:50,338 --> 01:19:51,630 (laughter) 1850 01:19:51,713 --> 01:19:53,713 For Ricky is funny. 1851 01:19:53,796 --> 01:19:55,505 Hey, Luce? 1852 01:19:55,588 --> 01:19:57,880 Let's talk about it after lunch. 1853 01:19:59,546 --> 01:20:01,421 - Jim. - That's lunch! 1854 01:20:01,505 --> 01:20:02,588 One hour! 1855 01:20:02,671 --> 01:20:04,671 Back onstage for notes! 1856 01:20:04,755 --> 01:20:06,505 - MAN: All right, lunch! - (indistinct chatter) 1857 01:20:10,463 --> 01:20:11,671 Hang on! 1858 01:20:11,755 --> 01:20:13,463 Desi, does that work for you? 1859 01:20:13,546 --> 01:20:15,171 Works perfect. 1860 01:20:16,255 --> 01:20:18,255 We'll talk about it after lunch. 1861 01:20:20,171 --> 01:20:22,046 It needed to be fixed. 1862 01:20:22,130 --> 01:20:24,880 ♫ ♫ 1863 01:20:32,338 --> 01:20:33,838 BOB: I think we can get more out of “hypocrite.” 1864 01:20:33,921 --> 01:20:35,588 - MADELYN: Yeah. - Yeah? Like what? 1865 01:20:35,671 --> 01:20:38,338 Like Lucy turns to Desi and says, 1866 01:20:38,421 --> 01:20:40,713 “Well, it's nice to know I'm married to a hypocrite.” 1867 01:20:40,796 --> 01:20:42,671 And Desi gets his back up and says… 1868 01:20:42,755 --> 01:20:44,046 “Hypocrite?” 1869 01:20:44,130 --> 01:20:46,380 Then turns to Fred and says, “What's a hypocrite?” 1870 01:20:46,463 --> 01:20:48,755 Fred tells him, “It's a person who says one thing 1871 01:20:48,838 --> 01:20:50,213 - but does another.” - Mm-hmm. 1872 01:20:50,296 --> 01:20:52,546 Desi says, “Thank you,” turns back to Lucy and says… 1873 01:20:52,630 --> 01:20:54,713 - “Oh, yeah?” (chuckles) - Yeah, that's good. That's good. 1874 01:20:54,796 --> 01:20:56,505 Yeah, that's exactly what I was gonna pitch. 1875 01:20:56,588 --> 01:20:58,546 - But I pitched it faster. - By interrupting me. 1876 01:20:58,630 --> 01:21:00,171 How do you think I got to be a woman in a comedy room? 1877 01:21:00,255 --> 01:21:01,255 (knocking) 1878 01:21:01,338 --> 01:21:02,838 Hey, is now a good time? 1879 01:21:02,921 --> 01:21:04,088 JESS: Yeah. Madelyn had a good idea. 1880 01:21:04,171 --> 01:21:07,838 Desi's entrance, we shoot it both ways and see which one gets the bigger laugh. 1881 01:21:07,921 --> 01:21:09,213 That was my idea. 1882 01:21:09,296 --> 01:21:10,838 It's a bad idea. 1883 01:21:10,921 --> 01:21:12,255 Mm. It's just not your day. 1884 01:21:12,338 --> 01:21:14,296 - Can I have a minute in your office? - JESS: Yeah. 1885 01:21:14,380 --> 01:21:15,630 Sure. 1886 01:21:15,713 --> 01:21:17,463 (sighs) All right. 1887 01:21:17,546 --> 01:21:18,963 (phone ringing in distance) 1888 01:21:19,046 --> 01:21:21,421 What's wrong with shooting it both ways? 1889 01:21:21,505 --> 01:21:23,880 You'll be on the floor during the show, right? 1890 01:21:23,963 --> 01:21:25,463 I'll be where I always am. 1891 01:21:25,546 --> 01:21:27,296 In full view of the audience? 1892 01:21:27,380 --> 01:21:28,880 I suppose. 1893 01:21:28,963 --> 01:21:30,380 Since we're doing it both ways, 1894 01:21:30,463 --> 01:21:33,463 how about we do it once with your pants on and once with your pants off? 1895 01:21:33,546 --> 01:21:35,463 - That's not the same. - It is. 1896 01:21:35,546 --> 01:21:39,171 And I don't want to do the version with my pants off in front of 200 people. 1897 01:21:39,255 --> 01:21:42,130 But that's not what I need to talk to you about. 1898 01:21:42,213 --> 01:21:44,213 You're not gonna tell me you're pregnant again, are you? 1899 01:21:44,296 --> 01:21:47,338 No. I'm still pregnant from before, but no. 1900 01:21:47,421 --> 01:21:50,130 Jess, you know how much I value you. 1901 01:21:50,213 --> 01:21:52,338 - I think I do. - You know you do. 1902 01:21:52,421 --> 01:21:53,505 Okay. 1903 01:21:53,588 --> 01:21:55,713 And you also know what it is Desi does around here. 1904 01:21:55,796 --> 01:21:57,463 Sure. 1905 01:21:57,546 --> 01:22:00,130 - I mean, every business decision goes through Desi. -Mm-hmm. 1906 01:22:00,213 --> 01:22:03,213 In fact, most business decisions are made by Desi. 1907 01:22:03,296 --> 01:22:06,088 - You married a very bright man. - I did. 1908 01:22:06,171 --> 01:22:08,463 He makes a lot of creative decisions, too. 1909 01:22:08,546 --> 01:22:10,505 Mm. I'm not sure I'd say a lot. 1910 01:22:10,588 --> 01:22:11,796 I would. I'd say a lot. 1911 01:22:11,880 --> 01:22:13,630 He devised the camera system that we use. 1912 01:22:13,713 --> 01:22:16,630 He's the reason the East Coast doesn't see the show on a foggy kinescope. 1913 01:22:16,713 --> 01:22:18,588 - Yeah. - And even though we use three cameras, 1914 01:22:18,671 --> 01:22:20,921 the studio audience can see every scene. 1915 01:22:21,005 --> 01:22:22,921 - That's him, too. - Mm-hmm. 1916 01:22:23,005 --> 01:22:24,505 And the four of us, the cast, we can see the audience. 1917 01:22:24,588 --> 01:22:25,713 I give him a lot of credit for that. 1918 01:22:25,796 --> 01:22:29,171 He's the one who thought up Lucy being pregnant on the show. 1919 01:22:30,255 --> 01:22:32,796 That is never gonna happen, 'cause no matter what CBS says, 1920 01:22:32,880 --> 01:22:34,130 Philip Morris is never gonna let it happen. 1921 01:22:34,213 --> 01:22:36,130 But, like I said, I give him credit. 1922 01:22:36,213 --> 01:22:38,713 That's the thing, though. You don't. 1923 01:22:38,796 --> 01:22:39,963 What do you mean? 1924 01:22:40,046 --> 01:22:42,296 He doesn't get credit as an executive producer, 1925 01:22:42,380 --> 01:22:44,755 which, let's face it, is what he is. 1926 01:22:44,838 --> 01:22:47,130 - (sighs) - You get sole credit. 1927 01:22:47,213 --> 01:22:49,713 I didn't win my credit in a raffle! I earn it. 1928 01:22:49,796 --> 01:22:52,630 I'm the showrunner! Not to mention being the creator of the show. 1929 01:22:52,713 --> 01:22:54,838 I don't see how we could do the show without you. 1930 01:22:54,921 --> 01:22:56,088 You absolutely could not. 1931 01:22:56,171 --> 01:22:59,005 I don't see how we could do the show without Desi either. 1932 01:22:59,088 --> 01:23:02,088 Because he plays Ricky, which he does get a screen credit for. 1933 01:23:02,171 --> 01:23:03,630 - Jess… -Is this something our agents should be talking about? 1934 01:23:03,713 --> 01:23:06,046 - No. -'Cause I'm not at all comfortable with this conversation. 1935 01:23:06,130 --> 01:23:08,380 I'm about to make you less comfortable. 1936 01:23:09,421 --> 01:23:11,671 I need you to help me save my marriage. 1937 01:23:11,755 --> 01:23:14,171 ♫ ♫ 1938 01:23:14,255 --> 01:23:17,088 I need you to help me save my marriage. 1939 01:23:25,088 --> 01:23:27,546 What do you think they're talking about in there? 1940 01:23:27,630 --> 01:23:30,380 I think they're talking about you. 1941 01:23:30,463 --> 01:23:33,296 I think they want to pay you less because you're not as funny as I am. 1942 01:23:33,380 --> 01:23:35,796 Mary Pat, would you mind asking Desi if I can come see him? 1943 01:23:35,880 --> 01:23:37,296 Sure. 1944 01:23:37,380 --> 01:23:39,088 (door closes) 1945 01:23:39,171 --> 01:23:40,505 LUCILLE: Madelyn? 1946 01:23:40,588 --> 01:23:41,588 Yeah. 1947 01:23:42,630 --> 01:23:44,630 (phone ringing in distance) 1948 01:23:48,296 --> 01:23:50,838 - Was everything all right in there? - Yeah. 1949 01:23:50,921 --> 01:23:52,005 - So, listen. - Mm-hmm. 1950 01:23:52,088 --> 01:23:55,046 It has to be coherent, because if it's anything goes, then nothing's funny. 1951 01:23:55,130 --> 01:23:57,838 - Anything Goes was a hit. - Not Cole Porter's Anything Goes. 1952 01:23:57,921 --> 01:23:59,755 - I mean if an… - I know. 1953 01:23:59,838 --> 01:24:01,755 - Why are you telling me? - The opening, 1954 01:24:01,838 --> 01:24:04,630 Ricky's entrance with his hands over my eyes, that was Jess, right? 1955 01:24:06,588 --> 01:24:11,046 Outside of that room, we make it a point not to talk about who wrote what. 1956 01:24:11,130 --> 01:24:12,713 It wasn't Jess? 1957 01:24:12,796 --> 01:24:13,838 Again… 1958 01:24:13,921 --> 01:24:15,255 You know I'm right about the logic. 1959 01:24:15,338 --> 01:24:19,171 Why aren't you backing me up instead of endorsing a plan to shoot it both ways? 1960 01:24:19,255 --> 01:24:22,296 Listen, why don't we get together for a drink or a swim this weekend, 1961 01:24:22,380 --> 01:24:23,921 and we can put it on the agenda? 1962 01:24:24,005 --> 01:24:27,421 Because the show is tomorrow and I'm fine talking about it now. 1963 01:24:27,505 --> 01:24:30,171 By all means, let's unnecessarily add more to what you're worried about this week. 1964 01:24:30,255 --> 01:24:32,505 - I'm not worried! I'm… - Shh. 1965 01:24:32,588 --> 01:24:33,796 (hushed) I'm not worried. 1966 01:24:33,880 --> 01:24:36,671 I'm saying I count on you to be the firewall, to be– 1967 01:24:36,755 --> 01:24:40,505 to-to make sure– just– logic, okay? 1968 01:24:40,588 --> 01:24:42,838 I won't say who wrote what, but I can tell you 1969 01:24:42,921 --> 01:24:45,005 that I'm the lady in there trying to make Lucy smarter. 1970 01:24:45,088 --> 01:24:46,171 Excuse me? 1971 01:24:46,255 --> 01:24:48,796 I'm the one trying, every week, to… 1972 01:24:48,880 --> 01:24:50,588 Lucy's dumb? 1973 01:24:50,671 --> 01:24:51,880 I didn't say that. 1974 01:24:51,963 --> 01:24:54,213 You're trying… 1975 01:24:54,296 --> 01:24:58,130 struggling, it sounds like– to make Lucy smarter? 1976 01:24:58,213 --> 01:25:00,546 I created this character with you. (chuckles softly) 1977 01:25:00,630 --> 01:25:02,421 And she needs to be smarter? 1978 01:25:02,505 --> 01:25:07,171 She sometimes, for the sake of comedy, is infantilized. 1979 01:25:08,463 --> 01:25:10,671 - (exhales sharply) - This is a crazy week, 1980 01:25:10,755 --> 01:25:12,796 time and place to be having this conversation. 1981 01:25:12,880 --> 01:25:15,130 - This is important… - How is she infantilized? 1982 01:25:15,213 --> 01:25:16,755 She literally says, “Waah.” 1983 01:25:16,838 --> 01:25:18,755 'Cause when she does, 60 million people laugh, 1984 01:25:18,838 --> 01:25:22,130 just like with Lou Costello and Stan Laurel, and you get paid. 1985 01:25:22,213 --> 01:25:25,046 When those two grown men play slow-witted five-year-olds, I cringe. 1986 01:25:25,130 --> 01:25:26,880 Then I question your comedy IQ. 1987 01:25:26,963 --> 01:25:28,380 No, you don't. 1988 01:25:28,463 --> 01:25:29,755 You think I'm the funniest writer in the room, 1989 01:25:29,838 --> 01:25:32,255 and that's why you're talking to me and not Jess. 1990 01:25:35,671 --> 01:25:37,338 Many people regard Lucy as clever. 1991 01:25:37,421 --> 01:25:39,630 I mean, she always has a plan to overcome an obstacle. 1992 01:25:39,713 --> 01:25:43,380 Yeah, but oftentimes that obstacle is her husband's permission. 1993 01:25:43,463 --> 01:25:47,963 You really think, this week, right now, is the best time to talk about this? 1994 01:25:48,046 --> 01:25:51,630 - No! I literally said that 30 seconds ago. - (sighs) 1995 01:25:52,630 --> 01:25:54,546 Look… 1996 01:25:54,630 --> 01:25:58,213 it's just a female perspective from another generation. 1997 01:25:58,296 --> 01:26:00,088 Another generation? 1998 01:26:00,171 --> 01:26:02,005 Ah, you're on a roll. 1999 01:26:02,088 --> 01:26:04,921 Bette Davis, Bacall, Hepburn. 2000 01:26:05,005 --> 01:26:06,338 - Funny women. - Judy Holliday. 2001 01:26:06,421 --> 01:26:08,046 Judy Holliday? Go to hell. 2002 01:26:08,130 --> 01:26:09,630 They are funny women. 2003 01:26:09,713 --> 01:26:12,213 And they're smart and tough and they outsmart the men. 2004 01:26:12,296 --> 01:26:13,671 So why do you and Gracie Allen feel like you have to… 2005 01:26:13,755 --> 01:26:15,255 Oh, stop. Okay. 2006 01:26:15,338 --> 01:26:16,505 Stop, stop, stop, stop. 2007 01:26:16,588 --> 01:26:18,463 Maddie, I love you. 2008 01:26:18,546 --> 01:26:19,921 You're like, I guess, 2009 01:26:20,005 --> 01:26:22,588 - a great-granddaughter to me from another generation. -Hmm. 2010 01:26:22,671 --> 01:26:25,213 And my fervent wish for you is that, one day, 2011 01:26:25,296 --> 01:26:26,796 you will be half as funny as Gracie Allen. 2012 01:26:26,880 --> 01:26:31,171 In the meantime, please remember that Lucy and Ricky and Fred and Ethel, 2013 01:26:31,255 --> 01:26:34,005 if they live past tomorrow, have to live in a reality 2014 01:26:34,088 --> 01:26:36,463 that accepts the physical laws of the universe. 2015 01:26:36,546 --> 01:26:38,213 Ricky knows that Lucy doesn't believe 2016 01:26:38,296 --> 01:26:40,796 there are possibly eight other men in the apartment! 2017 01:26:40,880 --> 01:26:42,088 Understood. 2018 01:26:42,171 --> 01:26:43,463 (sighs heavily) 2019 01:26:43,546 --> 01:26:45,088 But I don't make that decision. 2020 01:26:45,171 --> 01:26:46,380 (door opens) 2021 01:26:46,463 --> 01:26:48,171 JESS: Let's go! 2022 01:26:49,630 --> 01:26:51,005 (sighs) 2023 01:26:53,421 --> 01:26:54,921 Mary Pat, cut the flowers. 2024 01:26:55,005 --> 01:26:56,505 And to be clear, by “cut the flowers,” I mean… 2025 01:26:56,588 --> 01:26:59,005 - She knows exactly what you mean. - Yeah, let's go. 2026 01:27:00,755 --> 01:27:02,463 (mutters) Judy Holliday. 2027 01:27:03,505 --> 01:27:04,838 This isn't happening. 2028 01:27:04,921 --> 01:27:06,380 ♫ ♫ 2029 01:27:06,463 --> 01:27:07,755 (clears throat) 2030 01:27:11,630 --> 01:27:14,255 - (knocking) - Mr. Arnaz? 2031 01:27:14,338 --> 01:27:16,005 Come in. 2032 01:27:16,088 --> 01:27:18,755 Mr. Oppenheimer is here to see you with Mr. Carroll and Miss Pugh. 2033 01:27:18,838 --> 01:27:21,338 Uh, nothing from Mr. Lyons yet? 2034 01:27:21,421 --> 01:27:22,380 No. 2035 01:27:22,463 --> 01:27:23,630 (sighs) 2036 01:27:23,713 --> 01:27:25,296 Anyone at Philip Morris? 2037 01:27:25,380 --> 01:27:26,713 No. 2038 01:27:31,838 --> 01:27:33,755 Gracias. 2039 01:27:33,838 --> 01:27:36,171 - (phone ringing) - Acompáñame al escenario. 2040 01:27:36,255 --> 01:27:38,088 Walk me to the stage. We're an hour behind. 2041 01:27:38,171 --> 01:27:40,046 Okay, Madelyn's got a new joke for the second act. 2042 01:27:40,130 --> 01:27:42,880 I just this minute told Lucy that we don't talk about who wrote what. 2043 01:27:42,963 --> 01:27:45,005 Madelyn came up with the joke just seconds after I did. 2044 01:27:45,088 --> 01:27:47,796 Isn't it possible that two comedy writers working on the same script 2045 01:27:47,880 --> 01:27:49,255 came up with the same joke at the same time? 2046 01:27:49,338 --> 01:27:50,421 - It's possible. - Thank you. 2047 01:27:50,505 --> 01:27:52,713 - Just not what happened. - Do I need to be here for any of this? 2048 01:27:52,796 --> 01:27:55,005 Uh, “Hypocrite? What's a hypocrite?” 2049 01:27:55,088 --> 01:27:57,796 - So that's to Fred. - Got it. Good. 2050 01:27:57,880 --> 01:27:59,338 - Is that what you wanted me for? - Okay, no, no, no, no, no. 2051 01:27:59,421 --> 01:28:01,963 The hypocrite joke is for episode nine. That's the script we're working on, okay? 2052 01:28:02,046 --> 01:28:03,963 If Lucy's gonna be pregnant– Lucy Ricardo– 2053 01:28:04,046 --> 01:28:06,380 then we have to introduce it in nine, according to your timetable. 2054 01:28:06,463 --> 01:28:09,546 - Yeah. -So I just want to confirm that there's no chance we're doing that, right? 2055 01:28:09,630 --> 01:28:11,338 We are doing that. 2056 01:28:11,421 --> 01:28:13,171 You know Philip Morris won't let us. 2057 01:28:13,255 --> 01:28:15,380 And-and even if they did, we don't want to see this girl pregnant. 2058 01:28:15,463 --> 01:28:16,588 We don't want to know that she's pregnant. 2059 01:28:16,671 --> 01:28:17,838 We don't want to know how she got pregnant. 2060 01:28:17,921 --> 01:28:20,838 Do we have viewers who don't know how women get pregnant? 2061 01:28:20,921 --> 01:28:22,421 Yeah, they're called children. 2062 01:28:22,505 --> 01:28:25,380 Uh, do any of these children have younger brothers or sisters? 2063 01:28:25,463 --> 01:28:28,213 You know what, you know what else a lot of our viewers are? Christian. 2064 01:28:28,296 --> 01:28:30,088 Ah, I'm way ahead of you. 2065 01:28:30,171 --> 01:28:35,713 I'm going to have a priest, a minister and a rabbi review every script. 2066 01:28:35,796 --> 01:28:37,921 I'm gonna get rewritten by a priest, a minister and a rabbi? 2067 01:28:38,005 --> 01:28:39,671 - Mm-hmm. - A joke in there somewhere. 2068 01:28:39,755 --> 01:28:41,921 Good, because if I'm rewritten by a priest, a minister and a rabbi, 2069 01:28:42,005 --> 01:28:43,213 there aren't gonna be many left in the script. 2070 01:28:43,296 --> 01:28:44,546 - (laughs) Good one. - Uh, Des… 2071 01:28:44,630 --> 01:28:46,088 No, no, e-enough. Enough. 2072 01:28:46,171 --> 01:28:48,088 I sent a telegram to Alfred Lyons. 2073 01:28:48,171 --> 01:28:49,296 - You did. - Yes. 2074 01:28:49,380 --> 01:28:50,796 And I've put the decision in his hands. 2075 01:28:50,880 --> 01:28:52,838 - Okay. Okay. - All right. 2076 01:28:52,921 --> 01:28:54,255 (chuckles) Okay, good. 2077 01:28:54,338 --> 01:28:57,005 - You're that sure he's gonna say no, huh? - I am. 2078 01:28:57,088 --> 01:28:59,088 - That it? Okay. - Mm-hmm. -Yeah. 2079 01:28:59,171 --> 01:29:02,338 Oh, Bob, Bob, tell Desi that thing you were saying before. 2080 01:29:03,421 --> 01:29:04,505 Me? 2081 01:29:04,588 --> 01:29:06,630 Yeah. 2082 01:29:06,713 --> 01:29:08,338 - Really? - DESI: Guys. 2083 01:29:08,421 --> 01:29:09,963 JESS: No, it was interesting. 2084 01:29:10,046 --> 01:29:11,671 - Bob was saying that you… - Hmm? 2085 01:29:11,755 --> 01:29:13,796 …are really the title character of the show. 2086 01:29:13,880 --> 01:29:17,713 Because you are the “I” in I Love Lucy. 2087 01:29:18,921 --> 01:29:20,380 Mm-hmm. 2088 01:29:20,463 --> 01:29:21,880 So strictly speaking, you have top billing. 2089 01:29:22,963 --> 01:29:25,255 I am the “I” in I Love Lucy. 2090 01:29:25,338 --> 01:29:27,296 (chuckles) Yeah. 2091 01:29:27,380 --> 01:29:28,880 I never thought of it that way. 2092 01:29:28,963 --> 01:29:30,921 - Yeah, you like that? - I like that. 2093 01:29:31,005 --> 01:29:32,005 Yeah. 2094 01:29:32,088 --> 01:29:33,880 (chuckles) Jess… 2095 01:29:33,963 --> 01:29:37,338 patronize me again, and I'll stick my hand down your throat 2096 01:29:37,421 --> 01:29:39,963 and pull your fucking lungs out. (pops lips) 2097 01:29:40,046 --> 01:29:41,796 - Look… (stammers) - ROSEN: Excuse me. 2098 01:29:41,880 --> 01:29:42,880 What is it? 2099 01:29:42,963 --> 01:29:44,671 It-It's a telegram for Mr. Arnaz. 2100 01:29:44,755 --> 01:29:47,421 - It's from Mr. Lyons and Philip Morris. - Mm. 2101 01:29:48,838 --> 01:29:50,838 - Vamos a ver. - Yeah. 2102 01:29:54,880 --> 01:29:56,046 Let's go, please. 2103 01:29:56,130 --> 01:29:58,171 - We are an hour behind. - Yeah. 2104 01:30:03,838 --> 01:30:05,671 What does it say? 2105 01:30:06,755 --> 01:30:09,796 “To all Philip Morris and CBS employees; 2106 01:30:11,046 --> 01:30:13,171 Don't fuck with the Cuban.” 2107 01:30:14,380 --> 01:30:16,963 (thunder rumbling) 2108 01:30:19,921 --> 01:30:22,630 LUCILLE: “He didn't come home and he hasn't called. 2109 01:30:22,713 --> 01:30:25,921 Not that it makes any difference to me.” 2110 01:30:26,005 --> 01:30:28,713 “Oh, I can see that it doesn't make any difference to you. 2111 01:30:28,796 --> 01:30:31,755 Why don't you call Ricky and tell him you're sorry?” 2112 01:30:31,838 --> 01:30:35,130 “What? You think I'd allow my pride…” Hmm. 2113 01:30:35,213 --> 01:30:38,421 “Do you think I'd swallow my pride like that?” 2114 01:30:38,505 --> 01:30:39,505 (whispers) Never. 2115 01:30:41,130 --> 01:30:42,338 (whispers) What are you doing up? 2116 01:30:42,421 --> 01:30:45,213 (hushed) I woke up and you weren't there. 2117 01:30:45,296 --> 01:30:49,296 So I went to the nursery to see if everything was okay, and… 2118 01:30:49,380 --> 01:30:51,421 she kicked her blanket off, so I fixed it. 2119 01:30:51,505 --> 01:30:53,421 That woke her up. 2120 01:30:53,505 --> 01:30:56,130 But as you can see, I got her back to sleep. 2121 01:30:56,213 --> 01:30:57,838 (thunder rumbling softly) 2122 01:30:57,921 --> 01:31:00,796 You know we pay a housekeeper to do the laundry, right? 2123 01:31:01,880 --> 01:31:04,380 I like doing laundry. I never get the chance. 2124 01:31:05,463 --> 01:31:08,171 Okay, I'm going to put her back in her little apartment now. 2125 01:31:09,255 --> 01:31:10,421 You should come back to bed. 2126 01:31:10,505 --> 01:31:11,713 I will. 2127 01:31:13,505 --> 01:31:15,046 (exhales heavily) 2128 01:31:17,796 --> 01:31:20,421 “Do you think I'd call him and go crawling back?” 2129 01:31:20,505 --> 01:31:23,088 “What? Do you think I'd swallow my pride?” 2130 01:31:23,171 --> 01:31:26,796 “Do you think I'd call and go crawling…” 2131 01:31:26,880 --> 01:31:29,046 - (thunder rumbling softly) - (sighs heavily) 2132 01:31:29,130 --> 01:31:30,505 (inhales sharply) 2133 01:31:30,588 --> 01:31:33,380 ♫ ♫ 2134 01:31:35,630 --> 01:31:39,671 (whispers) “What? Do you think I'd swallow my pride like that?” 2135 01:31:56,546 --> 01:31:58,546 ♫ ♫ 2136 01:32:23,005 --> 01:32:25,005 ♫ ♫ 2137 01:32:50,005 --> 01:32:52,005 ♫ ♫ 2138 01:33:05,338 --> 01:33:07,213 - WILLIAM: Lucy? - LUCILLE: Over here. 2139 01:33:07,296 --> 01:33:08,755 Thanks, Bobby. 2140 01:33:08,838 --> 01:33:10,505 BOBBY: You got it, Bill. 2141 01:33:10,588 --> 01:33:12,130 WILLIAM: (sighs) What the hell? 2142 01:33:12,213 --> 01:33:14,130 LUCILLE: Thanks for coming down. 2143 01:33:15,213 --> 01:33:18,088 - It's 2:00 in the morning. - Sorry about that. 2144 01:33:20,546 --> 01:33:21,546 Kid, what's going on? 2145 01:33:21,630 --> 01:33:23,880 I'm gonna restage the dinner scene. 2146 01:33:23,963 --> 01:33:26,296 Let's go to my dressing room and call Desi. 2147 01:33:26,380 --> 01:33:29,171 No, Desi's at home with the baby. We can do this. 2148 01:33:29,255 --> 01:33:31,255 - Does he know you're here? - He's sleeping. 2149 01:33:31,338 --> 01:33:33,130 Let me take you home. 2150 01:33:34,130 --> 01:33:36,421 - Is that him? - That's Viv. 2151 01:33:36,505 --> 01:33:38,588 You called her, too? 2152 01:33:38,671 --> 01:33:41,755 - I'm restaging the dinner scene. - (car door opens, closes) 2153 01:33:41,838 --> 01:33:43,755 This isn't for beginners, you know. This isn't school. 2154 01:33:43,838 --> 01:33:45,546 I don't hire the directors. 2155 01:33:45,630 --> 01:33:47,963 I know. I'm just saying. 2156 01:33:48,046 --> 01:33:50,880 - VIVIAN: What's happening here? - Thanks for coming, Viv. 2157 01:33:50,963 --> 01:33:53,088 - Is everything all right? - WILLIAM: The three of us 2158 01:33:53,171 --> 01:33:55,213 are on an empty soundstage at 2:00 in the morning, 2159 01:33:55,296 --> 01:33:57,546 she's drunk, I'm not. 2160 01:33:57,630 --> 01:33:59,463 So, yeah, everything's great. Why do you ask? 2161 01:33:59,546 --> 01:34:01,463 Your call just said to come to the stage, that it was an emergency. 2162 01:34:01,546 --> 01:34:03,338 - So I… - We need to re-block the dinner scene. 2163 01:34:03,421 --> 01:34:05,338 It's not gonna take long. 2164 01:34:05,421 --> 01:34:06,838 - What? - You heard her right. 2165 01:34:06,921 --> 01:34:10,296 It won't take long. We just need to make an adjustment. 2166 01:34:11,630 --> 01:34:15,338 Two people who are fighting have to share a seat at a dinner table. 2167 01:34:15,421 --> 01:34:21,171 First thing, we take this, move it upstage so the camera can see you. 2168 01:34:21,255 --> 01:34:24,880 Now, this can't just be a mishmash of pushing. 2169 01:34:24,963 --> 01:34:27,171 Can't just be a scrum. 2170 01:34:27,255 --> 01:34:29,005 Each move has to be articulate. 2171 01:34:29,088 --> 01:34:31,421 So Ethel elbows Fred. 2172 01:34:31,505 --> 01:34:32,505 Elbow him. 2173 01:34:32,588 --> 01:34:33,921 (audience laughter) 2174 01:34:34,005 --> 01:34:36,171 Fred elbows Ethel a little harder. 2175 01:34:36,255 --> 01:34:37,255 - Ow! - (audience laughter) 2176 01:34:37,338 --> 01:34:39,713 Ethel elbows Fred harder. 2177 01:34:39,796 --> 01:34:41,213 - Hey! - Then Fred. 2178 01:34:42,380 --> 01:34:44,588 Now hit each other at the same time and fall off the chair. 2179 01:34:45,671 --> 01:34:47,838 (audience laughter, clapping) 2180 01:34:47,921 --> 01:34:48,880 That's that. 2181 01:34:48,963 --> 01:34:52,588 Let's run it a couple of times at speed. Hmm? 2182 01:34:53,588 --> 01:34:54,755 Did something happen? 2183 01:34:54,838 --> 01:34:56,921 - I'm sorry? - At home. 2184 01:34:57,005 --> 01:34:59,255 - Did something just happen? - Uh… (exhales) 2185 01:34:59,338 --> 01:35:01,713 No. I was, um… 2186 01:35:03,713 --> 01:35:05,505 No. 2187 01:35:05,588 --> 01:35:07,588 I was doing some laundry and… 2188 01:35:07,671 --> 01:35:09,171 No. 2189 01:35:11,921 --> 01:35:13,921 Yeah. (sniffs) Yeah. 2190 01:35:14,005 --> 01:35:15,338 I wanted to fix this beat. 2191 01:35:15,421 --> 01:35:18,005 I… (exhales heavily) I couldn't sleep. 2192 01:35:23,296 --> 01:35:26,796 It's like when you're not sure if you've left the oven unlocked. 2193 01:35:26,880 --> 01:35:28,380 - Door unlocked. Nothing. - (fingers snap) 2194 01:35:28,463 --> 01:35:29,463 I wanted to fix this beat. 2195 01:35:29,546 --> 01:35:31,380 Let's do it again. 2196 01:35:37,088 --> 01:35:40,213 You know I did this show so Desi and I could be together? 2197 01:35:40,296 --> 01:35:42,046 ♫ ♫ 2198 01:35:42,130 --> 01:35:44,505 I had no idea it was gonna be a hit. 2199 01:35:47,213 --> 01:35:49,171 I just thought, “Well, the construction department's gonna 2200 01:35:49,255 --> 01:35:52,213 build us a little apartment, and that's where we'll live most of the time.” 2201 01:35:52,296 --> 01:35:53,963 You know? 2202 01:35:57,546 --> 01:35:59,421 And it worked out. 2203 01:35:59,505 --> 01:36:01,255 This is where… 2204 01:36:08,255 --> 01:36:10,796 It's like a story you'd read a little girl. 2205 01:36:11,880 --> 01:36:13,880 A witch puts a curse on a woman. 2206 01:36:13,963 --> 01:36:17,130 She'll be adored by the man she loves, 2207 01:36:17,213 --> 01:36:20,546 but only as long as she stays on this… 2208 01:36:20,630 --> 01:36:22,255 (whispers) patch of ground. 2209 01:36:23,588 --> 01:36:24,796 (chuckles softly) 2210 01:36:26,046 --> 01:36:29,171 It's still a lot more than most people get. 2211 01:36:34,505 --> 01:36:35,713 Let's run it at speed. 2212 01:36:38,213 --> 01:36:39,671 I'm gonna drive you home. 2213 01:36:39,755 --> 01:36:42,255 - Let me take… - I am the biggest asset 2214 01:36:42,338 --> 01:36:45,380 in the portfolio of the Columbia Broadcasting System, 2215 01:36:45,463 --> 01:36:51,088 the biggest asset in the portfolio of Philip Morris tobacco, Westinghouse. 2216 01:36:51,171 --> 01:36:54,838 I get paid a fortune to do exactly what I love doing. 2217 01:36:54,921 --> 01:36:59,963 I work side by side with my husband, who is genuinely impressed by me. 2218 01:37:00,046 --> 01:37:04,046 And all I have to do to keep it is kill every week for 36 weeks in a row, 2219 01:37:04,130 --> 01:37:07,296 and then do it again the next year. 2220 01:37:07,380 --> 01:37:09,838 Kill. 2221 01:37:09,921 --> 01:37:12,630 So let's do it again. 2222 01:37:12,713 --> 01:37:14,713 ♫ ♫ 2223 01:37:23,088 --> 01:37:25,338 OLDER MADELYN: After RKO dropped Lucy's contract, 2224 01:37:25,421 --> 01:37:28,255 MGM had her in for a Technicolor test, 2225 01:37:28,338 --> 01:37:33,963 which she didn't know yet would be one of the most important moments in her life. 2226 01:37:34,046 --> 01:37:38,838 A man named Sydney Guilaroff was Metro's chief hair stylist. 2227 01:37:38,921 --> 01:37:43,838 Looked at Lucy and said, “The hair is brown but the soul is on fire.” 2228 01:37:45,338 --> 01:37:47,005 He dyed her hair a new color. 2229 01:37:47,088 --> 01:37:48,380 - (indistinct chatter) - Quiet, please. 2230 01:37:48,463 --> 01:37:50,421 (band playing lively theme music) 2231 01:37:50,505 --> 01:37:53,713 It's time for My Favorite Husband, starring Lucille Ball. 2232 01:37:53,796 --> 01:37:54,838 (applause) 2233 01:37:54,921 --> 01:37:56,921 Jell-O, everybody! 2234 01:38:00,505 --> 01:38:02,505 ANNOUNCER: Yes, it's the gay family series, 2235 01:38:02,588 --> 01:38:04,671 starring Lucille Ball with Richard Denning, 2236 01:38:04,755 --> 01:38:07,713 transcribed and brought to you by the Jell-O family of desserts. 2237 01:38:07,796 --> 01:38:10,296 - ♫ J-E-L-L-Oh! ♫ - (band playing jingle) 2238 01:38:10,380 --> 01:38:14,046 ♫ The big red letters stand for the Jell-O family ♫ 2239 01:38:14,130 --> 01:38:18,130 ♫ Oh, the big red letters stand for the Jell-O family ♫ 2240 01:38:18,213 --> 01:38:19,671 - ♫ That's Jell-O ♫ - ♫ Yum, yum, yum ♫ 2241 01:38:19,755 --> 01:38:21,755 - ♫ Jell-O puddings ♫ - ♫ Yum, yum, yum. ♫ 2242 01:38:21,838 --> 01:38:23,130 (jingle ends) 2243 01:38:23,213 --> 01:38:25,338 ANNOUNCER: And now, Lucille Ball with Richard Denning 2244 01:38:25,421 --> 01:38:29,296 as Liz and George Cooper, two people who live together and like it. 2245 01:38:29,380 --> 01:38:30,963 - (light music playing) - As we look in on the Coopers, 2246 01:38:31,046 --> 01:38:33,505 it's a beautiful spring day and Liz is just going to the kitchen 2247 01:38:33,588 --> 01:38:35,213 - to talk to Katy, the maid. - (birds chirping) 2248 01:38:35,296 --> 01:38:38,130 - Oh, Katy? - Yes, Mrs. Cooper? 2249 01:38:38,213 --> 01:38:40,463 Katy, I've got some good news for you. 2250 01:38:40,546 --> 01:38:42,130 - Uh-oh. - “Uh-oh”? 2251 01:38:42,213 --> 01:38:43,463 What do you mean, “Uh-oh”? 2252 01:38:43,546 --> 01:38:46,630 I say I've got some good news and you say, “Uh-oh”? 2253 01:38:46,713 --> 01:38:48,505 (audience laughter) 2254 01:38:48,588 --> 01:38:54,005 Every time you say you've got good news, it's usually good for you and bad for me. 2255 01:38:54,088 --> 01:38:56,921 Oh, well… 2256 01:38:57,005 --> 01:38:59,130 that's a little true. 2257 01:38:59,213 --> 01:39:00,505 (audience laughter) 2258 01:39:04,546 --> 01:39:05,963 - (knocking) - JESS: Lucy? 2259 01:39:06,046 --> 01:39:07,713 Come on in. 2260 01:39:09,963 --> 01:39:11,630 That was a good show. 2261 01:39:11,713 --> 01:39:12,963 Yeah, I thought so, too. 2262 01:39:13,046 --> 01:39:15,005 Pass it on to Maddie and Bob, would you? 2263 01:39:15,088 --> 01:39:18,005 Mm-hmm. I've, uh, I got two gentlemen out here who'd like to meet you, 2264 01:39:18,088 --> 01:39:20,421 and you're gonna want to hear what they have to say. 2265 01:39:20,505 --> 01:39:22,546 Does it need to sound ominous? Can't they just come in? 2266 01:39:22,630 --> 01:39:24,088 (chuckles softly) 2267 01:39:24,171 --> 01:39:25,630 Yeah. Please, come in. 2268 01:39:28,588 --> 01:39:30,713 - Lucille Ball. - Yes, sir. 2269 01:39:30,796 --> 01:39:33,505 David Levy, head of comedy development, CBS. 2270 01:39:33,588 --> 01:39:35,088 David Hart, head of current programming, CBS. 2271 01:39:35,171 --> 01:39:38,130 Well, David and David, 2272 01:39:38,213 --> 01:39:41,255 I've been in a current comedy at CBS and I've never heard of either of you. 2273 01:39:41,338 --> 01:39:43,171 CBS Television. 2274 01:39:43,255 --> 01:39:45,296 CBS does television? 2275 01:39:45,380 --> 01:39:48,338 - Yeah. Edward R. Murrow is one of our t… - I was kidding. 2276 01:39:48,421 --> 01:39:49,463 - Understood. - That was funny. 2277 01:39:49,546 --> 01:39:50,796 Thank you. 2278 01:39:50,880 --> 01:39:53,296 These, uh, these men have an interesting idea. 2279 01:39:53,380 --> 01:39:55,755 LEVY: Lucy, we've been here to the show a few times now. 2280 01:39:55,838 --> 01:39:58,880 We noticed that when you do the show, you use gestures and expressions. 2281 01:39:58,963 --> 01:40:00,130 You mean the acting? 2282 01:40:00,213 --> 01:40:01,213 Yeah. 2283 01:40:01,296 --> 01:40:04,588 My face, my body, my voice, that's all I get to work with. 2284 01:40:04,671 --> 01:40:06,755 It's just unusual because it's radio. 2285 01:40:06,838 --> 01:40:07,838 I watched Jack Benny. 2286 01:40:07,921 --> 01:40:10,546 He plays it for the studio audience. 2287 01:40:10,630 --> 01:40:12,213 It works pretty well for him. 2288 01:40:12,296 --> 01:40:13,380 It does. 2289 01:40:13,463 --> 01:40:15,713 And it works pretty well for you, too. Very well. 2290 01:40:15,796 --> 01:40:18,755 And we think it's a shame that no one gets to see it. 2291 01:40:18,838 --> 01:40:20,838 Invent a way to see what's on the radio. 2292 01:40:20,921 --> 01:40:23,088 We did. It's television. 2293 01:40:23,171 --> 01:40:25,838 - Are you here to sell me one? - JESS: Lucy. 2294 01:40:25,921 --> 01:40:29,588 They want to put My Favorite Husband on TV. 2295 01:40:31,046 --> 01:40:33,046 ♫ ♫ 2296 01:40:36,713 --> 01:40:38,338 - LUCILLE: I'm very interested. - (lively chatter) 2297 01:40:38,421 --> 01:40:39,880 ROGER: That's great. 2298 01:40:39,963 --> 01:40:42,588 LEVY: Is it too early to raise a glass? 2299 01:40:42,671 --> 01:40:44,213 To My Favorite Husband. 2300 01:40:44,296 --> 01:40:45,546 - LUCILLE: Yes. - (chuckles) 2301 01:40:45,630 --> 01:40:47,880 Except I don't want to do My Favorite Husband. 2302 01:40:49,921 --> 01:40:52,963 - I'm confused. - Yeah, me, too. 2303 01:40:53,046 --> 01:40:54,713 Don't panic. It's simple. 2304 01:40:54,796 --> 01:40:57,713 I'm interested in the idea of doing My Favorite Husband on television. 2305 01:40:57,796 --> 01:40:59,380 I just want it to be a different show. 2306 01:41:00,755 --> 01:41:03,255 (chuckles) What kind of show do you want it to be? 2307 01:41:03,338 --> 01:41:05,838 One where Desi plays my husband. 2308 01:41:08,421 --> 01:41:11,296 I understand there's a casting issue. 2309 01:41:11,380 --> 01:41:13,880 - Was that to me? - Yes. 2310 01:41:13,963 --> 01:41:16,046 I wasn't sure. You're quite a ways away. 2311 01:41:16,130 --> 01:41:18,588 Our casting department has come up with a list 2312 01:41:18,671 --> 01:41:21,338 of very exciting names that we think you'll like. 2313 01:41:21,421 --> 01:41:23,838 - Pass this down to Lucy. - These are all very funny men. 2314 01:41:23,921 --> 01:41:25,296 I think we have mimeos for everyone. 2315 01:41:25,380 --> 01:41:27,671 One of the best lists I've seen in a while. 2316 01:41:27,755 --> 01:41:28,713 Number 12 died last week. 2317 01:41:28,796 --> 01:41:30,421 - That's my fault. - There's no issue. 2318 01:41:30,505 --> 01:41:32,463 What was that? 2319 01:41:32,546 --> 01:41:34,463 I was answering Mr. Macy. 2320 01:41:34,546 --> 01:41:35,755 There's no casting issue. 2321 01:41:35,838 --> 01:41:39,880 I'm ready and eager to do a half-hour domestic comedy for CBS, 2322 01:41:39,963 --> 01:41:44,421 if the role of my husband– let's call him Shmezy– is played by Desi. 2323 01:41:44,505 --> 01:41:46,546 - Can I remark on this? - Please. 2324 01:41:46,630 --> 01:41:50,546 On My Favorite Husband, your husband is the fifth vice president of a bank. 2325 01:41:50,630 --> 01:41:52,713 - Yes. - Can I ask you, in all candor, 2326 01:41:52,796 --> 01:41:56,130 do you see Desi as the fifth vice president of a bank? 2327 01:41:56,213 --> 01:41:59,005 I can't see him being the fifth vice president of anything. 2328 01:41:59,088 --> 01:42:00,671 I can see him owning the bank. 2329 01:42:01,630 --> 01:42:02,838 You see the problem? 2330 01:42:02,921 --> 01:42:04,963 I see what you think is the problem. 2331 01:42:05,046 --> 01:42:06,338 - MACY: Lucy. - Yes. 2332 01:42:06,421 --> 01:42:08,880 I don't ordinarily come to meetings like this. 2333 01:42:08,963 --> 01:42:13,171 This meeting is several floors below my general interest. 2334 01:42:13,255 --> 01:42:16,963 I'm here to deliver a hard truth. 2335 01:42:17,046 --> 01:42:23,421 We cannot have an all-American girl married to a man who isn't American. 2336 01:42:23,505 --> 01:42:25,088 He is American. 2337 01:42:25,171 --> 01:42:29,088 He was a sergeant in the U.S. Army and he served in the war. 2338 01:42:29,171 --> 01:42:31,921 You know exactly what I mean, Lucy. 2339 01:42:32,005 --> 01:42:34,130 - He's Spanish. - Still no. 2340 01:42:34,213 --> 01:42:35,630 He's never been to Spain in his life. 2341 01:42:35,713 --> 01:42:37,255 He speaks Spanish. He was born in Cuba. 2342 01:42:37,338 --> 01:42:41,505 His father was the mayor of Santiago, Cuba's second largest city. 2343 01:42:41,588 --> 01:42:43,588 - You know exactly what… - What you mean? Yes. 2344 01:42:43,671 --> 01:42:44,713 I do. 2345 01:42:44,796 --> 01:42:47,255 Look, I'm not here to get a job for my nephew. 2346 01:42:47,338 --> 01:42:49,963 Desi Arnaz is a phenomenally talented man. 2347 01:42:50,046 --> 01:42:52,838 Not just a world-class musician, but a very good actor 2348 01:42:52,921 --> 01:42:56,421 who would be a movie star if there was such a thing as a Cuban movie star. 2349 01:42:56,505 --> 01:42:59,046 Moreover, we work very well together. 2350 01:42:59,130 --> 01:43:02,505 I go out and meet him when he's touring, he brings me up for some sketches, 2351 01:43:02,588 --> 01:43:03,838 and it works. 2352 01:43:03,921 --> 01:43:05,171 - Jess? - Yeah, it works. 2353 01:43:05,255 --> 01:43:08,005 Any cultural differences will make for good comedy. 2354 01:43:08,088 --> 01:43:09,213 Am I right, Jess? 2355 01:43:09,296 --> 01:43:10,880 You're not wrong. 2356 01:43:10,963 --> 01:43:12,588 Now, I don't want to take another meeting like this 2357 01:43:12,671 --> 01:43:14,671 'cause I don't know how many more people will fit around the table. 2358 01:43:14,755 --> 01:43:16,921 My position is not gonna change. 2359 01:43:17,005 --> 01:43:18,421 You want me on television? 2360 01:43:18,505 --> 01:43:21,005 There is only one television show that I'm willing to do. 2361 01:43:21,088 --> 01:43:23,796 So, what's it gonna be? 2362 01:43:24,880 --> 01:43:26,463 (sighs softly) 2363 01:43:27,546 --> 01:43:30,713 ♫ band playing I Love Lucy theme ♫ 2364 01:43:37,255 --> 01:43:38,671 (lively chatter) 2365 01:43:50,546 --> 01:43:51,921 All right, holding. Get Des. 2366 01:43:57,505 --> 01:44:00,380 - (music ends) - (applause) 2367 01:44:00,463 --> 01:44:02,421 (applause continues in distance) 2368 01:44:03,505 --> 01:44:04,963 We think it's about 15 minutes. 2369 01:44:06,046 --> 01:44:07,546 - You think? - We're holding for something. 2370 01:44:07,630 --> 01:44:10,380 - I'm not sure what. - Okay, thanks. 2371 01:44:10,463 --> 01:44:11,880 Holding? 2372 01:44:13,088 --> 01:44:14,255 (knocking) 2373 01:44:14,338 --> 01:44:16,338 Yeah, come in. 2374 01:44:17,380 --> 01:44:19,005 (sighs) 2375 01:44:20,546 --> 01:44:22,880 - Can I have a second? - Sure. 2376 01:44:23,838 --> 01:44:25,838 - (footsteps receding) - (band playing in distance) 2377 01:44:27,338 --> 01:44:29,046 I think I know why you want to see me. 2378 01:44:29,130 --> 01:44:31,213 - Do you? - Hear me out. 2379 01:44:31,296 --> 01:44:32,421 I asked you to do me a favor, Jess. 2380 01:44:32,505 --> 01:44:34,421 - I asked you to give him an E.P. credit. - Mm-hmm. 2381 01:44:34,505 --> 01:44:38,255 Instead, you tried to convince him he was the title character or some bullshit. 2382 01:44:38,338 --> 01:44:39,380 What the hell was that?! 2383 01:44:39,463 --> 01:44:40,796 - I'm sorry if he was insulted. - (sighs) 2384 01:44:40,880 --> 01:44:42,421 I mean, I know he's insulted, so I'm sorry. 2385 01:44:42,505 --> 01:44:44,921 He wasn't insulted. He was laughing about it. 2386 01:44:45,005 --> 01:44:46,546 But, yeah, he's insulted. 2387 01:44:46,630 --> 01:44:48,213 No, he's offended. I'm insulted. 2388 01:44:48,296 --> 01:44:51,463 - I asked you to do me a small favor. - Yeah. 2389 01:44:51,546 --> 01:44:53,421 And it's not like you don't owe me a couple. 2390 01:44:53,505 --> 01:44:55,588 (sighs) 2391 01:44:55,671 --> 01:44:57,671 It wasn't a small favor. 2392 01:44:57,755 --> 01:44:59,546 And I don't know what you think I owe you. 2393 01:44:59,630 --> 01:45:01,380 - Really? - It wasn't a small favor. 2394 01:45:01,463 --> 01:45:04,255 - You asked me to save your marriage. - No, I… 2395 01:45:04,338 --> 01:45:06,338 And-and it's not the first time you've asked me to do that, is it? 2396 01:45:06,421 --> 01:45:09,213 I asked you to give him an E.P. credit, that's all. 2397 01:45:09,296 --> 01:45:11,421 Oh, no problem. Can my wife play Lucy once in a while? 2398 01:45:11,505 --> 01:45:13,255 If your wife played Lucy once in a while, 2399 01:45:13,338 --> 01:45:15,963 I would think it appropriate she be so credited. 2400 01:45:16,046 --> 01:45:17,588 And what do you mean it's not the first time 2401 01:45:17,671 --> 01:45:19,630 - I asked you to save my marriage? - (scoffs) 2402 01:45:19,713 --> 01:45:21,380 (imitating Lucille) “Jess, Jess, we'll have Desi play my husband. 2403 01:45:21,463 --> 01:45:23,588 - It'll save my marriage.” - Was that supposed to be me? 2404 01:45:23,671 --> 01:45:25,088 - Yeah, yeah. - Don't do voices. 2405 01:45:25,171 --> 01:45:27,088 Oh, are you insulted? Desi's offended? 2406 01:45:27,171 --> 01:45:29,880 You asked me to give away my job title like it was a parking spot! 2407 01:45:29,963 --> 01:45:31,213 You're right. 2408 01:45:31,296 --> 01:45:32,713 - I'm sorry! - Jesus Christ, Lucy! 2409 01:45:32,796 --> 01:45:34,630 Sometimes I think that you… 2410 01:45:37,630 --> 01:45:38,838 Wait, what? 2411 01:45:40,421 --> 01:45:42,130 You're right. I'm sorry. 2412 01:45:42,213 --> 01:45:43,380 I was dead wrong. 2413 01:45:43,463 --> 01:45:45,671 I wasn't expecting that. 2414 01:45:45,755 --> 01:45:47,255 - I know. - Have you ever said that to me before? 2415 01:45:47,338 --> 01:45:49,255 I doubt it, but… 2416 01:45:49,338 --> 01:45:51,796 I've thought it, if that means anything. 2417 01:45:51,880 --> 01:45:53,713 It does. 2418 01:45:54,713 --> 01:45:57,880 It's just been a compound fracture of a week. 2419 01:45:59,880 --> 01:46:01,505 Hey. 2420 01:46:01,588 --> 01:46:03,630 - Why are we holding? - I'm not sure. 2421 01:46:03,713 --> 01:46:05,213 We're holding. Someone has to know why. 2422 01:46:05,296 --> 01:46:07,255 - He's-he's coming. - (knocking) 2423 01:46:07,338 --> 01:46:09,630 - (sighs) - Come in. 2424 01:46:09,713 --> 01:46:11,463 Desi's asking to see you in his office. 2425 01:46:12,546 --> 01:46:14,588 - You mean in his dressing room? - No, he's in his office 2426 01:46:14,671 --> 01:46:17,088 with some CBS executives and some men from Philip Morris. 2427 01:46:19,880 --> 01:46:21,588 Why is he in his office at showtime? 2428 01:46:24,005 --> 01:46:26,255 ♫ ♫ 2429 01:46:28,130 --> 01:46:30,880 The evening editions just came out. 2430 01:46:34,838 --> 01:46:36,255 Listen to me. 2431 01:46:36,338 --> 01:46:38,005 Memorize this. 2432 01:46:38,088 --> 01:46:40,046 “It's none of your fucking business.” 2433 01:46:44,213 --> 01:46:45,296 There. 2434 01:46:45,380 --> 01:46:47,796 Let that be the best thing I ever wrote. 2435 01:46:54,421 --> 01:46:55,630 Nah. 2436 01:46:55,713 --> 01:46:57,421 It's still “Vitameatavegamin.” 2437 01:47:00,505 --> 01:47:01,963 (sighs) 2438 01:47:05,213 --> 01:47:07,213 (hushed chatter) 2439 01:47:10,796 --> 01:47:12,213 (chatter quiets) 2440 01:47:15,880 --> 01:47:17,046 (clears throat) 2441 01:47:19,130 --> 01:47:20,546 DESI: The evening edition. 2442 01:47:25,380 --> 01:47:26,796 - It's all right. - (sighs) 2443 01:47:26,880 --> 01:47:28,296 It's all right. 2444 01:47:29,588 --> 01:47:30,588 (exhales sharply) 2445 01:47:30,671 --> 01:47:32,505 It's in four-inch type. 2446 01:47:32,588 --> 01:47:34,588 I'm gonna fix this. 2447 01:47:34,671 --> 01:47:36,005 That's Hindenburg type. 2448 01:47:36,088 --> 01:47:38,046 I've already made the calls. 2449 01:47:38,130 --> 01:47:39,921 - And they used red ink. - Yeah. 2450 01:47:40,005 --> 01:47:42,421 I didn't even know newspapers had red ink. 2451 01:47:42,505 --> 01:47:43,838 I guess they do. 2452 01:47:43,921 --> 01:47:46,213 I was cleared. 2453 01:47:46,296 --> 01:47:49,546 Somehow, the city editor, a woman named Agness Underwood, 2454 01:47:49,630 --> 01:47:54,380 has a photostatic copy of the affidavit showing you registered in 1936 2455 01:47:54,463 --> 01:47:56,755 as a voter intending to affiliate with the Communist Party. 2456 01:47:56,838 --> 01:47:58,005 But I was cleared. 2457 01:47:58,088 --> 01:48:00,046 After the testimony, they stamped “canceled” on the card, 2458 01:48:00,130 --> 01:48:01,171 and I saw the card. 2459 01:48:01,255 --> 01:48:02,796 Other papers are showing the canceled card. 2460 01:48:02,880 --> 01:48:05,755 They're running a caption that says, “Note the cancellation at left.” 2461 01:48:05,838 --> 01:48:10,130 But the Herald-Express took the word “canceled” out of the document altogether. 2462 01:48:10,213 --> 01:48:11,588 Other papers? 2463 01:48:11,671 --> 01:48:14,671 Yes, yes, but I've-I've made calls and we are taking care of this. 2464 01:48:14,755 --> 01:48:16,796 - We– Eh? - Calls to who? 2465 01:48:16,880 --> 01:48:18,838 Every reporter within 20 minutes of this soundstage. 2466 01:48:18,921 --> 01:48:20,005 That's why we're holding. 2467 01:48:20,088 --> 01:48:22,255 - You're saying reporters are coming here? - Yeah. 2468 01:48:22,338 --> 01:48:24,421 We'll seat them in the back of the bleachers. 2469 01:48:24,505 --> 01:48:26,546 You think we're still filming a show? 2470 01:48:26,630 --> 01:48:29,005 Why are none of you talking? 2471 01:48:29,088 --> 01:48:30,505 Desi has an idea. 2472 01:48:30,588 --> 01:48:34,838 I'm going to warm up the audience the way I always do, 2473 01:48:34,921 --> 01:48:38,671 except instead of “Cuban Pete” and the joke about the turtle, 2474 01:48:38,755 --> 01:48:40,880 I'm going to tell them what happened. 2475 01:48:40,963 --> 01:48:44,296 I'm going to explain that you checked the wrong box, 2476 01:48:44,380 --> 01:48:47,296 I'm going to show them the canceled document, 2477 01:48:47,380 --> 01:48:49,755 and then I'm going to bring you out 2478 01:48:49,838 --> 01:48:52,505 so the press sees them give you a round of applause. 2479 01:48:52,588 --> 01:48:53,671 Yes. 2480 01:48:54,671 --> 01:48:55,880 Hmm? 2481 01:48:57,255 --> 01:48:59,213 Fellas, can we, um… 2482 01:48:59,296 --> 01:49:01,380 have the room for just a moment? 2483 01:49:14,630 --> 01:49:18,546 You're not telling these people that I checked the wrong box. 2484 01:49:18,630 --> 01:49:20,630 This is a critical moment, Lucy. 2485 01:49:20,713 --> 01:49:22,630 - If I'm gonna die… - You're not. 2486 01:49:22,713 --> 01:49:24,546 …I would rather die standing up. 2487 01:49:24,630 --> 01:49:25,921 (scoffs) I don't have any idea what that is suppo… 2488 01:49:26,005 --> 01:49:27,796 I'm not an idiot. I didn't check the wrong box. 2489 01:49:27,880 --> 01:49:28,880 You saw the headline. 2490 01:49:28,963 --> 01:49:31,838 - You can see the headline from outer space. -Then please… 2491 01:49:31,921 --> 01:49:34,963 Grandpa Fred raised me from when I was age four. 2492 01:49:35,046 --> 01:49:38,130 He cared about the little guy. He cared about workers' rights. 2493 01:49:38,213 --> 01:49:41,005 It was a tribute to him, and to say that I checked the wrong… 2494 01:49:41,088 --> 01:49:42,463 Grandpa Fred, Grandpa Fred. 2495 01:49:42,546 --> 01:49:45,463 Grandpa Fred was wrong, Lucy! 2496 01:49:45,546 --> 01:49:49,088 Yes, he didn't tell you the part where they throw your father in prison 2497 01:49:49,171 --> 01:49:51,296 for the crime of being the mayor of a city. 2498 01:49:51,380 --> 01:49:55,671 I was chased to this country, Lucy! 2499 01:49:55,755 --> 01:49:57,838 Believe me, you checked the wrong box! 2500 01:50:00,796 --> 01:50:02,338 And if they don't applaud? 2501 01:50:03,963 --> 01:50:06,671 They will. And the press will write that they did. 2502 01:50:09,213 --> 01:50:11,546 You're gonna tell them I was accused of… 2503 01:50:11,630 --> 01:50:14,088 They're going to read it in the morning anyway. 2504 01:50:14,171 --> 01:50:17,880 We have a sample population of 200 people on our stage, so… 2505 01:50:17,963 --> 01:50:19,546 Miss Rosen! 2506 01:50:19,630 --> 01:50:21,630 If they boo me? 2507 01:50:23,005 --> 01:50:24,671 If they boo you… 2508 01:50:27,005 --> 01:50:28,963 …then we're done. 2509 01:50:29,046 --> 01:50:31,255 - Here, tonight. - (door opens) 2510 01:50:38,755 --> 01:50:40,380 Call this man. 2511 01:50:41,838 --> 01:50:44,588 Tell them it's for me. 2512 01:50:44,671 --> 01:50:46,005 They'll find him. 2513 01:50:46,088 --> 01:50:48,255 He's expecting my call. 2514 01:50:48,338 --> 01:50:49,838 Tell me when you have him. 2515 01:50:49,921 --> 01:50:51,338 ROSEN: Yes, sir. 2516 01:50:52,671 --> 01:50:54,046 (door closes) 2517 01:50:58,921 --> 01:51:00,921 (rumba music playing faintly) 2518 01:51:02,880 --> 01:51:04,880 (music continues inside) 2519 01:51:09,505 --> 01:51:11,921 Someone said they spotted you going out here. 2520 01:51:13,088 --> 01:51:14,755 (sighs) 2521 01:51:17,671 --> 01:51:18,880 I was just told. 2522 01:51:18,963 --> 01:51:20,255 (sighs) 2523 01:51:20,338 --> 01:51:23,338 Jesus, Lulu. Four-inch type? 2524 01:51:23,421 --> 01:51:25,046 Red ink. 2525 01:51:27,921 --> 01:51:29,630 I shouldn't have piled on this week. 2526 01:51:29,713 --> 01:51:31,130 It just… 2527 01:51:32,255 --> 01:51:33,588 What? 2528 01:51:34,588 --> 01:51:36,796 None of that matters right now. 2529 01:51:39,421 --> 01:51:41,171 May be the last time we're out here. 2530 01:51:41,255 --> 01:51:43,046 Say it. 2531 01:51:43,130 --> 01:51:44,755 (sighs) 2532 01:51:47,296 --> 01:51:50,671 Lucy Ricardo is married to a man six years younger than she is, 2533 01:51:50,755 --> 01:51:54,046 and Ethel is married to her grandfather, and it's understood, 2534 01:51:54,130 --> 01:51:56,963 as the underlying premise for a running joke, 2535 01:51:57,046 --> 01:51:59,338 that I'm not pretty enough for him. 2536 01:51:59,421 --> 01:52:00,630 (clicks tongue) 2537 01:52:02,171 --> 01:52:04,338 It got to me. 2538 01:52:04,421 --> 01:52:06,171 And at the world's worst time. 2539 01:52:13,588 --> 01:52:15,671 That was a knockout dress. 2540 01:52:16,755 --> 01:52:18,963 (chuckles) 2541 01:52:19,046 --> 01:52:21,421 Oh. You two want to be alone out here? 2542 01:52:21,505 --> 01:52:22,671 - No. - Yes. 2543 01:52:22,755 --> 01:52:24,588 (Madelyn chuckles) 2544 01:52:28,213 --> 01:52:29,796 (Madelyn sighs) 2545 01:52:32,088 --> 01:52:33,713 You're my hero. 2546 01:52:35,671 --> 01:52:37,588 I care about what works, Maddie. 2547 01:52:37,671 --> 01:52:39,421 ♫ ♫ 2548 01:52:39,505 --> 01:52:42,130 I care about what's funny. 2549 01:52:42,213 --> 01:52:47,505 I don't see myself caring about a woman's perspective from a new generation. 2550 01:52:47,588 --> 01:52:49,588 I care about you. 2551 01:52:52,880 --> 01:52:54,671 I'd love for someone to bring me breakfast. 2552 01:52:54,755 --> 01:52:58,338 - That's not what we were talking about. - (chuckles) 2553 01:52:58,421 --> 01:53:01,171 Doesn't a P.A. bring you breakfast every day? 2554 01:53:01,255 --> 01:53:02,921 - Yes. - Okay. 2555 01:53:03,005 --> 01:53:04,588 Never French toast. 2556 01:53:04,671 --> 01:53:06,963 - We'll look into that. - I came out here 2557 01:53:07,046 --> 01:53:11,796 to try to distract you with nonsense, but I assume these two beat me to it. 2558 01:53:11,880 --> 01:53:15,463 Viv doesn't like the jokes about Ethel being unappealing. 2559 01:53:15,546 --> 01:53:18,630 Yeah, there's no one within the sound of her voice who doesn't know that. 2560 01:53:18,713 --> 01:53:21,171 I said what I felt. 2561 01:53:21,255 --> 01:53:24,546 You've been saying what you felt since the first day of work. 2562 01:53:24,630 --> 01:53:27,505 It's not like you've suddenly given voice to your feelings. 2563 01:53:29,963 --> 01:53:31,171 You know what? 2564 01:53:33,505 --> 01:53:35,213 Sweet ladies? 2565 01:53:38,255 --> 01:53:40,588 Something dies inside a man… 2566 01:53:41,921 --> 01:53:44,963 …it just dies… 2567 01:53:46,088 --> 01:53:49,463 …the first time he hears a girl call him old. 2568 01:53:53,088 --> 01:53:58,380 So on the subject of Jess, Bob and Madelyn writing Ethel jokes, 2569 01:53:58,463 --> 01:54:00,171 I'm indifferent. 2570 01:54:00,255 --> 01:54:03,255 (groans) You two… 2571 01:54:06,088 --> 01:54:08,213 …are good actors. 2572 01:54:10,963 --> 01:54:12,963 It's a privilege doing this show with you. 2573 01:54:13,046 --> 01:54:14,963 Now you're scaring the shit out of me. 2574 01:54:15,046 --> 01:54:16,130 I was just gonna say. 2575 01:54:16,213 --> 01:54:18,088 LUCILLE: Desi's gonna tell the audience. 2576 01:54:18,171 --> 01:54:19,380 He's invited press. 2577 01:54:19,463 --> 01:54:21,796 He's betting that the audience will accept the truth, 2578 01:54:21,880 --> 01:54:24,296 give their approval, and the press will write about it. 2579 01:54:30,921 --> 01:54:32,546 I'd take the other side of that bet. 2580 01:54:32,630 --> 01:54:33,630 - (door opens) - P.A.: Excuse me. 2581 01:54:33,713 --> 01:54:35,671 Sorry. Mr. Arnaz is ready to do the warm-up. 2582 01:54:35,755 --> 01:54:38,255 Uh, they told me you wanted to know. 2583 01:54:38,338 --> 01:54:39,755 LUCILLE: Thank you. 2584 01:54:43,296 --> 01:54:45,171 All right. (clears throat) 2585 01:54:47,630 --> 01:54:49,546 See you out there. 2586 01:54:53,171 --> 01:54:55,338 - Good show. - Good show. 2587 01:54:55,421 --> 01:54:56,671 WILLIAM: Good show. 2588 01:55:00,130 --> 01:55:01,463 Luce. 2589 01:55:03,338 --> 01:55:07,130 The dinner scene is inarguably better. 2590 01:55:10,088 --> 01:55:12,088 (band playing lively music) 2591 01:55:13,338 --> 01:55:15,338 (music continues) 2592 01:55:18,546 --> 01:55:20,463 (indistinct chatter) 2593 01:55:29,463 --> 01:55:31,088 (music ends) 2594 01:55:31,171 --> 01:55:33,880 Now, ladies and gentlemen, give a warm welcome 2595 01:55:33,963 --> 01:55:36,588 to one of the stars of I Love Lucy. 2596 01:55:36,671 --> 01:55:38,880 - You know him as Ricky Ricardo. - (women gasping) 2597 01:55:38,963 --> 01:55:41,088 Here's Desi Arnaz! 2598 01:55:41,171 --> 01:55:43,088 - (applause) - (band plays bright riff) 2599 01:55:43,171 --> 01:55:44,505 Thank you. 2600 01:55:44,588 --> 01:55:45,880 Oh, thank you. 2601 01:55:45,963 --> 01:55:48,421 (people shouting “Desi!") 2602 01:55:48,505 --> 01:55:51,421 Thank you. Thank you. 2603 01:55:51,505 --> 01:55:54,005 Thank you very much. (sighs) 2604 01:55:54,088 --> 01:55:56,838 Usually, right now, I'd be doing the final audience warm-up. 2605 01:55:56,921 --> 01:55:58,338 I'd tell you an old joke about a turtle. 2606 01:55:58,421 --> 01:56:00,171 - (laughter) - And I'd point out 2607 01:56:00,255 --> 01:56:03,255 our groundbreaking camera system that allows the studio audience 2608 01:56:03,338 --> 01:56:08,380 to watch the show unobstructed and introduce you to the rest of the cast. 2609 01:56:08,463 --> 01:56:11,963 I'm not doing that tonight, and here's why. 2610 01:56:12,046 --> 01:56:16,421 Last week, my wife, Lucille Ball, 2611 01:56:16,505 --> 01:56:19,546 was asked to testify in front of a closed session 2612 01:56:19,630 --> 01:56:23,005 of the House Un-American Activities Committee. 2613 01:56:23,088 --> 01:56:24,588 (audience murmuring) 2614 01:56:24,671 --> 01:56:28,005 Yes, the congressmen who investigate Communism. 2615 01:56:29,088 --> 01:56:33,921 After hours of testimony, the committee concluded unambiguously 2616 01:56:34,005 --> 01:56:38,505 that Lucy was and is in no way involved with the Communist Party. 2617 01:56:38,588 --> 01:56:40,880 So everything's swell, right? 2618 01:56:40,963 --> 01:56:42,796 No. 2619 01:56:42,880 --> 01:56:46,963 Because this is the evening edition headline in the Herald-Express. 2620 01:56:48,963 --> 01:56:50,713 (audience gasping, murmuring) 2621 01:56:54,963 --> 01:56:57,463 ♫ ♫ 2622 01:57:02,463 --> 01:57:03,838 So… (clears throat) 2623 01:57:03,921 --> 01:57:05,588 I made some phone calls. 2624 01:57:05,671 --> 01:57:07,755 I called the editor of the Herald-Express. 2625 01:57:07,838 --> 01:57:10,296 I called the chairman of the committee. 2626 01:57:10,380 --> 01:57:13,255 I called all the members of the committee. 2627 01:57:13,338 --> 01:57:16,505 And I made one more call to someone, and I believe he's still on the line. 2628 01:57:16,588 --> 01:57:17,588 Thank you. 2629 01:57:18,963 --> 01:57:20,546 Are you still with me, sir? 2630 01:57:20,630 --> 01:57:22,588 MAN: (on phone, amplified) Yes. 2631 01:57:22,671 --> 01:57:26,005 I'm now standing in front of a studio audience in Hollywood, California, 2632 01:57:26,088 --> 01:57:28,921 and we are joined by a number of members of the press. 2633 01:57:29,005 --> 01:57:30,046 MAN: That's fine. 2634 01:57:32,171 --> 01:57:36,671 We want to know, sir, does the FBI have any case against Lucy? 2635 01:57:36,755 --> 01:57:41,296 Does the FBI have any evidence of wrongdoing? 2636 01:57:41,380 --> 01:57:47,505 Does the FBI have any reason to believe that Lucille Ball is a Communist? 2637 01:57:47,588 --> 01:57:49,546 No. Absolutely nothing. 2638 01:57:49,630 --> 01:57:52,463 - She's 100% clear. - (audience murmuring) 2639 01:57:52,546 --> 01:57:53,963 Thank you, sir. One more question. 2640 01:57:54,046 --> 01:57:55,630 Will you tell us your name please? 2641 01:57:55,713 --> 01:57:57,588 This is J. Edgar Hoover. 2642 01:57:57,671 --> 01:57:59,046 - (audience gasping) - DESI: Thank you, sir. 2643 01:57:59,130 --> 01:58:00,463 Enjoy your evening. 2644 01:58:00,546 --> 01:58:02,546 (applause) 2645 01:58:07,588 --> 01:58:11,005 Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my wife 2646 01:58:11,088 --> 01:58:13,588 and the star of I Love Lucy, Lucille Ball! 2647 01:58:13,671 --> 01:58:15,671 (audience cheering) 2648 01:58:15,755 --> 01:58:17,796 ♫ ♫ 2649 01:58:34,546 --> 01:58:36,921 (cheering continues) 2650 01:58:47,838 --> 01:58:49,838 So enjoy the show! 2651 01:58:51,255 --> 01:58:53,046 - (band playing I Love Lucy theme) - (applause) 2652 01:59:02,546 --> 01:59:04,963 - (sighing) - (music, applause continue in distance) 2653 01:59:05,046 --> 01:59:06,671 (footsteps approaching) 2654 01:59:07,880 --> 01:59:09,213 It's all over! 2655 01:59:09,296 --> 01:59:10,338 Thank you. 2656 01:59:10,421 --> 01:59:12,171 - It's over now. - Thank you. 2657 01:59:12,255 --> 01:59:13,338 They love you. 2658 01:59:13,421 --> 01:59:15,588 I love you. 2659 01:59:15,671 --> 01:59:18,588 No one's gonna mess with you ever, Lucy. 2660 01:59:18,671 --> 01:59:20,588 I thought they were gonna boo. 2661 01:59:20,671 --> 01:59:22,546 (laughs) You want to do a show? 2662 01:59:22,630 --> 01:59:24,130 Have you been cheating on me? 2663 01:59:25,213 --> 01:59:27,588 - What? - Have you been cheating on me? 2664 01:59:27,671 --> 01:59:29,505 - (laughs) Is this a bit? - No. 2665 01:59:30,588 --> 01:59:31,671 No, I haven't been. 2666 01:59:31,755 --> 01:59:34,213 When you stay out all night, you're on the boat playing cards? 2667 01:59:34,296 --> 01:59:36,088 - Yes. - You haven't been with anybody else? 2668 01:59:36,171 --> 01:59:38,671 - What's going on with you, honey? - Don't gaslight me. 2669 01:59:38,755 --> 01:59:39,880 Where did this come from? 2670 01:59:39,963 --> 01:59:41,963 I mean, they just cheered for you out there. 2671 01:59:42,046 --> 01:59:43,463 They got it right, didn't they? 2672 01:59:43,546 --> 01:59:46,630 - Lucy… - They only got the picture wrong. 2673 01:59:46,713 --> 01:59:48,671 - Luc… - Did they get it right? 2674 01:59:48,755 --> 01:59:50,588 - Lucy… - Did they get it exactly right? 2675 01:59:50,671 --> 01:59:55,046 Jesus Christ, I just proved out there that the Herald-Express got it wrong. 2676 01:59:55,130 --> 01:59:57,546 You think Confidential magazine– 2677 01:59:57,630 --> 01:59:59,921 Conf– We're about to do a show. 2678 02:00:00,005 --> 02:00:01,463 - (whispers) Just tell me. - Tell me why you think– 2679 02:00:01,546 --> 02:00:04,546 other than that garbage– 2680 02:00:04,630 --> 02:00:07,130 tell me why you think I've cheated on you. 2681 02:00:10,546 --> 02:00:13,213 That is your lipstick. 2682 02:00:13,296 --> 02:00:16,130 Remember? You kissed me at the beginning of the week, 2683 02:00:16,213 --> 02:00:18,463 and then took my handkerchief and wiped the lipstick off 2684 02:00:18,546 --> 02:00:19,838 and put it back in my pocket. 2685 02:00:19,921 --> 02:00:21,296 And you said you'd never done that before. 2686 02:00:21,380 --> 02:00:22,463 I hadn't. 2687 02:00:22,546 --> 02:00:24,213 Then what the hell are we talking about? 2688 02:00:25,880 --> 02:00:28,171 This is my lipstick. 2689 02:00:28,255 --> 02:00:29,421 (chuckles softly) 2690 02:00:29,505 --> 02:00:31,505 ♫ ♫ 2691 02:00:43,171 --> 02:00:45,588 They were just call girls. 2692 02:00:45,671 --> 02:00:47,046 Hmm. 2693 02:00:49,588 --> 02:00:50,880 They're hookers. 2694 02:00:50,963 --> 02:00:52,380 (exhales heavily) 2695 02:00:57,921 --> 02:01:00,005 It doesn't mean anything, Lucy. 2696 02:01:01,005 --> 02:01:03,213 - Look, Lucy, it doesn't mean… - Mm. 2697 02:01:03,296 --> 02:01:04,755 Let's do the show. Yeah? 2698 02:01:04,838 --> 02:01:06,505 Let's just forget about this for a half hour. 2699 02:01:06,588 --> 02:01:07,880 Yeah? Let's do the show. 2700 02:01:07,963 --> 02:01:10,505 Jim, let's go! 2701 02:01:10,588 --> 02:01:13,171 - It's not gonna get better than this. - Copy that. 2702 02:01:13,255 --> 02:01:15,463 - All right, everybody! - Let's do a show! 2703 02:01:15,546 --> 02:01:17,421 ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: This is places for scene “A”! 2704 02:01:17,505 --> 02:01:19,171 - MAN 1: Scene “A”! - MAN 2: Scene “A,” places! 2705 02:01:19,255 --> 02:01:21,296 ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: Okay, positions, everyone. 2706 02:01:21,380 --> 02:01:22,880 - Cameras up. - Cameras up. 2707 02:01:22,963 --> 02:01:24,296 ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: Quiet on set. Bell! 2708 02:01:24,380 --> 02:01:25,380 (soundstage bell rings) 2709 02:01:25,463 --> 02:01:26,796 - Quiet please! - Quiet please! 2710 02:01:26,880 --> 02:01:28,213 Picture's up! 2711 02:01:28,296 --> 02:01:30,088 - Picture's up. - Quiet, everyone! 2712 02:01:30,171 --> 02:01:32,171 - Let's roll sound. - Rolling! -Rolling! 2713 02:01:32,255 --> 02:01:33,546 - Sound speed. - And mark. 2714 02:01:33,630 --> 02:01:35,546 - Speed mark. - Dolly. 2715 02:01:35,630 --> 02:01:37,796 Settle. And action. 2716 02:01:38,880 --> 02:01:40,963 OLDER MADELYN: It ended up being a good show that night. 2717 02:01:41,046 --> 02:01:43,963 We did both versions of the opening, 2718 02:01:44,046 --> 02:01:46,255 but it was the original version that made it on the air, 2719 02:01:46,338 --> 02:01:47,546 the one with all the names. 2720 02:01:47,630 --> 02:01:51,005 You must've gotten a copy of the “B” negative, 2721 02:01:51,088 --> 02:01:52,588 'cause your original question was… 2722 02:01:52,671 --> 02:01:55,505 For the record, I won my bet with Desi. 2723 02:01:55,588 --> 02:01:57,963 CBS wouldn't let us use the word “pregnant.” 2724 02:01:59,546 --> 02:02:01,380 But more people watched the birth of Little Ricky 2725 02:02:01,463 --> 02:02:04,671 than had ever watched a television program before. 2726 02:02:05,838 --> 02:02:07,088 Your original question? 2727 02:02:07,171 --> 02:02:10,463 You asked about why Lucy stopped when we were doing the alt. 2728 02:02:10,546 --> 02:02:11,713 The alternate version. 2729 02:02:11,796 --> 02:02:14,838 We were doing Lucy's version of Ricky's entrance first. 2730 02:02:14,921 --> 02:02:16,546 She was doing the bit with the flowers, 2731 02:02:16,630 --> 02:02:19,213 which we couldn't use 'cause we were running long. 2732 02:02:21,505 --> 02:02:24,255 (audience laughter) 2733 02:02:27,796 --> 02:02:31,838 She takes a pitcher and pours water into the vase… 2734 02:02:31,921 --> 02:02:34,630 Which makes all the flowers come up to the surface. 2735 02:02:37,921 --> 02:02:40,088 (audience laughter) 2736 02:02:44,088 --> 02:02:47,505 It seemed like she just got lost in her own head for a second. 2737 02:02:47,588 --> 02:02:49,338 I can't remember what her cue was. 2738 02:02:49,421 --> 02:02:52,046 It may have been the only time she ever went up on a line. 2739 02:02:52,130 --> 02:02:55,088 I can't remember the first line, but we… 2740 02:02:55,171 --> 02:02:56,588 we had to stop and go again. 2741 02:02:56,671 --> 02:02:58,671 It was Desi's line. 2742 02:02:58,755 --> 02:03:00,505 It was the new bit Lucy put in. 2743 02:03:01,713 --> 02:03:03,171 (chuckles) What was his line? 2744 02:03:03,255 --> 02:03:06,755 Lucy, I'm home! 2745 02:03:06,838 --> 02:03:08,838 (audience laughter) 2746 02:03:11,796 --> 02:03:13,796 ♫ ♫ 2747 02:03:31,463 --> 02:03:32,671 (chuckles softly) 2748 02:03:35,463 --> 02:03:36,671 Sorry. 2749 02:03:36,755 --> 02:03:38,421 - I got lost for a second. - (audience chuckles) 2750 02:03:38,505 --> 02:03:39,921 DONALD: All right, let's cut and go again. 2751 02:03:40,005 --> 02:03:44,296 We never went back to do another take of the alternate opening. 2752 02:03:44,380 --> 02:03:46,546 Lucy just wanted to move on. 2753 02:03:46,630 --> 02:03:48,630 ♫ ♫ 2754 02:03:55,588 --> 02:03:57,588 (audience laughter) 2755 02:04:00,588 --> 02:04:02,713 - Oh! - Guess who it is. 2756 02:04:02,796 --> 02:04:05,505 Bill? Sam? 2757 02:04:05,588 --> 02:04:07,421 - Pat? - No. 2758 02:04:07,505 --> 02:04:11,088 - (audience laughter) - Pedro? Pablo? 2759 02:04:11,171 --> 02:04:12,338 Jose? 2760 02:04:12,421 --> 02:04:13,713 No, it's me. 2761 02:04:13,796 --> 02:04:16,296 - Ah, yes, of course. - (laughter continues) 2762 02:04:16,380 --> 02:04:19,171 - Uh… - Very, very funny. 2763 02:04:19,255 --> 02:04:21,671 - ♫ ♫ - Hey, company for dinner? 2764 02:04:21,755 --> 02:04:22,755 Who is it? 2765 02:04:22,838 --> 02:04:24,838 How do you like the new water glasses, Ricky? 2766 02:04:24,921 --> 02:04:26,463 Who's coming for dinner, Lucy? 2767 02:04:26,546 --> 02:04:29,171 Doesn't the table look beautiful tonight? 2768 02:04:29,255 --> 02:04:32,213 - Lucy, who is it? - Some people. 2769 02:04:32,296 --> 02:04:34,296 ♫ ♫ 2770 02:04:51,005 --> 02:04:53,005 ♫ ♫ 2771 02:05:23,005 --> 02:05:25,005 ♫ ♫ 2772 02:05:55,005 --> 02:05:57,005 ♫ ♫ 2773 02:06:27,005 --> 02:06:29,005 ♫ ♫ 2774 02:06:53,921 --> 02:06:55,921 (music fades) 2775 02:06:56,005 --> 02:06:58,005 (“Cuban Pete” playing) 2776 02:07:01,963 --> 02:07:04,046 ♫ They call me Cuban Pete ♫ 2777 02:07:04,130 --> 02:07:06,338 ♫ I'm the king of the rumba beat ♫ 2778 02:07:06,421 --> 02:07:08,171 ♫ When I play the maracas, I go ♫ 2779 02:07:08,255 --> 02:07:11,088 ♫ Chick chicky boom, chick chicky boom ♫ 2780 02:07:11,171 --> 02:07:13,255 ♫ Yes, sir, I'm Cuban Pete ♫ 2781 02:07:13,338 --> 02:07:15,505 ♫ I'm the craze of my native street ♫ 2782 02:07:15,588 --> 02:07:17,338 ♫ When I start to dance, everything goes ♫ 2783 02:07:17,421 --> 02:07:20,171 ♫ Chick chicky boom, chick chicky boom ♫ 2784 02:07:20,255 --> 02:07:24,880 ♫ The señoritas, they sing and how they swing with this rumbero ♫ 2785 02:07:24,963 --> 02:07:26,921 ♫ It's very nice ♫ 2786 02:07:27,005 --> 02:07:29,380 ♫ So full of spice ♫ 2787 02:07:29,463 --> 02:07:30,838 ♫ And when they're dancing ♫ 2788 02:07:30,921 --> 02:07:33,921 ♫ They bring a happy ring, the maraquero ♫ 2789 02:07:34,005 --> 02:07:36,338 ♫ Singing a song ♫ 2790 02:07:36,421 --> 02:07:38,505 ♫ All the day long ♫ 2791 02:07:38,588 --> 02:07:40,713 ♫ So if you like the beat ♫ 2792 02:07:40,796 --> 02:07:42,921 ♫ Take a lesson from Cuban Pete ♫ 2793 02:07:43,005 --> 02:07:44,838 ♫ And I'll teach you to chick chicky boom ♫ 2794 02:07:44,921 --> 02:07:47,546 ♫ Chick chicky boom, chick chicky boom ♫ 2795 02:07:47,630 --> 02:07:48,838 ♫ Sí, señorita ♫ 2796 02:07:48,921 --> 02:07:52,255 ♫ I know that you would like to chicky boom chick ♫ 2797 02:07:52,338 --> 02:07:54,463 ♫ Because it's the dance ♫ 2798 02:07:54,546 --> 02:07:56,671 ♫ Of Latin romance ♫ 2799 02:07:56,755 --> 02:08:01,380 ♫ And Cuban Pete doesn't teach you in a hurry like Arthur Murray ♫ 2800 02:08:01,463 --> 02:08:03,421 ♫ I come from Havana ♫ 2801 02:08:03,505 --> 02:08:06,046 ♫ And there's always mañana ♫ 2802 02:08:06,130 --> 02:08:08,171 ♫ So, señorita, please ♫ 2803 02:08:08,255 --> 02:08:10,421 ♫ Take it easy, do it with ease ♫ 2804 02:08:10,505 --> 02:08:12,171 ♫ And you'll love it when you do the chick ♫ 2805 02:08:12,255 --> 02:08:15,225 ♫ Chick chicky boom, chick chicky boom. ♫ 2806 02:08:15,249 --> 02:08:16,505 (song ends) 2807 02:08:17,546 --> 02:08:19,546 ♫ ♫ 2808 02:08:49,005 --> 02:08:51,005 ♫ ♫ 2809 02:09:21,005 --> 02:09:23,005 ♫ ♫ 2810 02:09:53,005 --> 02:09:55,005 ♫ ♫ 2811 02:10:25,005 --> 02:10:27,005 ♫ ♫ 2812 02:10:57,005 --> 02:10:59,005 ♫ ♫ 2813 02:11:07,005 --> 02:11:09,005 (music fades)