(GRUNTING)
(PACED BREATHING)
(INDISTINCT MUTTERING)
(PANTING)
(MUMBLING) Get out of the way.
(INDISTINCT MURMURING)
Can't believe it's you.
I'd rather eat a skunk's balls.
I'll save it for later.
(TEARING SOUND)
(DOOR OPENING)
Thank you. That was nice of you.
No, it wasn't. No, no.
Take him to the hole.
No, no, no, no, no. Please, please. I was being selfish. Okay?
Look, I didn't want to trip on it.
Please. I wasn't being nice.
Please. Anything. Anything but the hole!
I don't want to go to the hole!
- You're welcome. - Bummer, man!
- What are we supposed to eat now? - That bitch!
(ALL MUTTERING)
Tell her this isn't right.
What did we do?
Quiet! Shut up and let me think!
(GRUMBLING)
I said, "Shut up!"
Hold him down.
(GRUMBLING CONTINUES)
(SHOUTING)
Let's show him how much that fire can really burn.
(SCREAMING)
Next time I tell you to shut up,
shut up!
(WHIMPERING)
Hope nobody has to shit.
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING SUBSIDES)
What are you looking at?
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
(RADIO PLAYING CLASSIC MUSIC)
(BABIES CRYING AND COOING)
(LAUGHS)
You're a chubby little bugger, aren't you?
(SINGING) Way down in Tipperary where cow plop is thick
Where women are young and the lads all come quick
(LAUGHS)
There lived pretty Charlotte the girl we adore
The pride of dear Erin
The scarlet-haired whore
It's Scarlet the harlot the girl we adore
The pride of dear Erin
The scarlet-haired whore
Don't you worry, a mhac.
I'm gonna be the best da you ever seen.
(LAUGHS)
(BABIES CRYING)
(COUGHING)
(TRANSLATOR BEEPS)
Can I get you anything?
Puis-je vous offrir quelque chose?
No. I won't do it.
Still with the nightmares, then?
Fridge is busted.
You know, me brother used to get night terrors.
Me ma'd fix him something called a Celtic Sandman.
Dram of whisky, dram of honey, and just a pellet or two of rat poison.
Couple of swigs of that, you'll sleep so hard, you won't even dream.
Hey, you wanna go out?
Out where?
I don't know. Out, you know. Have fun, get in trouble.
Maybe go back to that Hurt Locker place.
I should stay here with Denis.
What about Jesse?
Nah.
He's got his God thing going on.
Needs his rest.
It's already 2:30 in the morning.
I think you do too, love. No?
Yeah. No.
Bad idea. You're right. Mmm-mmm.
- I'm going to bed. - All right.
- Night, Cass. - Night, love.
DENIS: Mords-moi.
Mords-moi.
- (TRANSLATOR BEEPING) - Mords-moi.
Mords-moi.
(COUGHING) Mords-moi.
Mords-moi!
Mords-moi.
- What is it? What's the matter? - Mords-moi. Mords-moi!
- All right. All right, all right. Calm down. - (COUGHING) Mords-moi.
Calm down. Calm down. Calm down.
TRANSLATOR: Bite me. Bite me.
Bite me. Bite me. Bite me.
Bite me. Bite me.
(SIGHS)
(TYPING)
Hey. I'm so glad I got the landlord to let us use the back staircase.
Super handy.
Yeah. Two sugars. Like you like.
So, this is worth all the risk, huh?
The best way to know your target is through concealed intimacy.
It's in the handbook.
So, when does the big boss man get here?
- "Boss man"? - Yeah. Herr Starr.
He's on his way.
What is that?
Boo Berry. Want some?
Those are why you look like that.
How's it goin'?
Bit of a rough night.
Doctor said there's no use to the hospital, just give him a sedative,
and told me to just be here for him, you know?
Anything I can do?
Nah, we're good, ta.
You headed out?
Yeah, I thought I'd go to Circuit Works.
Right. Okay. Fun.
I'm takin' the God audition. It's your idea, right?
See if they can enhance the video, blow up the image?
Yeah. Right, right.
Look for serial numbers on the barrel of the gun.
- See if they can trace the... - Back to the owner. Yeah.
Like they do in the shows. Makes sense.
That's my only lead.
It's all I got.
Well, it's a good idea. I'm glad I thought of it.
(LAUGHS)
- Tell me how you get on, all right? - (COUGHING)
All right.
Padre?
You know, you were asking if there was anything you could do to help?
- With Denis? - You want me to pray for him?
No. Christ, no. (LAUGHS)
(CLEARS THROAT)
I'm sure, if it'd help, like. But that's not what I was thinking.
What?
(COUGHING CONTINUES)
Look, I don't know if it's possible, or even doable,
or how your power works there
in terms of guidelines and parameters,
what the bloody rules are per se, but...
Padre, he's dying, all right?
- Maybe you could just... - Jesus, Cass.
I mean...
I'm not sure Genesis could help,
but even if it could,
I just...
I don't think that's what it's for.
All right. Of course.
(STAMMERING) Probably not.
- You understand? - Yeah.
All right.
- Hey. - Hey.
Where were you?
Hurt Locker.
What is it with you and that place? I don't get it.
Obviously.
You okay?
(SIGHS)
Yeah.
All right. Good.
I'm going to Circuit Works.
Why?
Show them the God audition.
See if they can blow up an image of the gun.
You know?
Trace the shooter.
It was Cassidy's idea.
Can I come?
Sure.
Okay. Next.
So, I have this video, it's unclear.
And I heard from a friend that you could improve the picture.
- Like they do in the shows. - "The shows"?
Yeah, you know, like, the cop shows.
When they blow up an image and see a license plate,
or a blurry sign, serial numbers on a gun.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
And, uh, what are you looking for?
Serial numbers on a gun.
We'll take a look. Give us a minute.
You should know
there are things on here that, out of context,
might seem confusing.
This is New Orleans. We've seen it all before.
And worse.
I just wanna know if you can see the serial numbers.
Right. Give us a minute.
It's got an auto-defrost. Ice maker right here.
Each one of these shelves can hold a gallon of liquid.
Can I get it today?
What are you doing?
Oh, we needed a fridge.
I can send an order in 20 minutes.
- Great. - Great.
Let's go.
I'm still waiting on the Dork dudes.
- The what? - The serial numbers?
The reason we came here, remember?
Oh. Right. Yeah.
You need me for that?
(PANTING)
This is how good behavior will be dealt with.
In other news, my team and I
have discovered the source of our technical difficulties,
so, we should have you back in your individual Hell cells
in short order.
- Man. - Jesus.
Yes. I'm excited, too.
Your cells, for those of you that don't know, are powered by a central generator.
From this generator, each block draws its allowance of power.
An allowance, a very specific allowance, based on personnel.
Based on you.
But problems can occur.
Problems like the ones we've been experiencing,
when there are more yous than there should be,
when one of the yous isn't supposed to be here.
My question is, who?
Don't be afraid. The sooner I know, the sooner I can get you out of here.
Who is it, then?
Who doesn't belong in Hell?
Going once...
Going twice...
MAN 1: No, over here. It's me.
- MAN 2: It's me. - WOMAN 1: No, I raised my hand first.
- MAN 3: No, over here! - WOMAN 2: It's me!
- WOMAN 3: No! - MAN 3: I don't belong here.
Put your hands down.
(GRUNTING)
All right. We'll do it that way.
Don't worry. Whoever you are,
we'll find you.
(DOOR CLOSING)
It's me. I know it is.
Single mother. Three kids.
I gave them everything. Cooking, cleaning.
And they weren't easy, those kids. I was at the end of my rope.
- And then you set them on fire. - Because it was never enough!
Okay, well, I'm the one who doesn't belong here
'cause I didn't kill anybody.
- You raped four women. - It was date rape. There's a difference.
"No" means "No."
Well, they said "yes" to the date, didn't they?
Ask my dad's lawyer.
That's implied consent.
I think I should go.
The things I did? I did them for public good.
It's you, isn't it?
You don't belong.
I'm probably the evilest person in here.
Other than you.
(EXHALES)
Is that so?
And what did you do?
None of your business.
(SIGHS)
You know my crimes, Eugene.
Why don't you tell me about yours, from one evil person to another?
It's a girl.
She trusted me.
(SIGHS)
I took advantage.
You
defiled her?
Maimed her?
Murdered?
I kissed her.
You don't belong here, my friend.
I don't deserve to get out.
Don't be fooled.
Mannering's not letting anybody get out.
When I first came here, they had high hopes for me.
They made me a custodian. I had free run of the place.
I saw things. I learnt how they think.
Someone gets out of Hell to tell the tale? Never.
I'll just tell them it's me.
Listen to me, Eugene.
Hell is more than Zagnuts and flat basketballs.
There are other places they can put you.
If I deserve something else...
...so be it.
(HITLER TUTS)
No, no, no, no, no.
That was nice of you, Eugene.
(COUGHING)
All right?
It's all right. It's all right. It's all right. Oh...
It's all right there. Get it out. That's it. Good boy. That's it, that's it.
All right. All right. Lie down. Lie back. Come on now. Lie back.
(WHIMPERING)
Yes, that's it. It's all right.
(COUGHING CONTINUES)
(GASPS)
Nice fridge.
CASSIDY: Hey, Tule.
Can I ask you a question?
Yep.
Do you ever think,
you know, maybe...
Maybe you'd wanna be me?
- Nope. - Not me, exactly.
Christ, I barely want that. (LAUGHS)
I mean, the other part. You know, like, what I am.
What? The vampire part?
The "not dying" part. If you could have that, would you want it?
Uh...
Live forever, huh? I guess it'd be cool.
You don't have to worry, 'cause nothing hurts you, you know?
- There's nothing to be afraid of. - Yeah, well, things still hurt.
You know what I mean.
You got all your fingers chopped off.
A couple of these bad boys later, and they're back.
Yeah. Well, all right. Yeah. That's a point.
To be sure, that's a bonus, all right.
But there's trade-offs like...
I used to love the beach.
When I was a boy,
me ma used to take us to the beach in the summer.
Me and me brother. Every Sunday.
Every other stupid git'd be down on his knees in church.
We'd have the whole run of the place. I loved it. (LAUGHS)
Christ, I can't remember the last time I was on a beach.
Yep. Me neither.
I hate the beach.
Then there's the boredom.
You've heard every joke.
Drugs barely work.
And then everyone you ever cared or loved just...
Just dies.
Except you.
Yep, that sucks.
Yeah.
(STRAINING)
ANNOUNCER: From the ocean floor below, to the mountain peaks above.
From the food you eat, to the mess you make.
We're behind it.
Making a today great for you, and a tomorrow great for us.
(CLERK CLEARS THROAT OVER PA)
Custer, Jesse. The Dork Docs will see you now.
Dude.
You did it? It worked?
Enjoy the brilliance.
So, we punch in nice and tight, right there, and... Oh!
What do we see there on the gun barrel?
- I don't see anything. - No, you don't.
I don't see anything.
- No serial numbers. - That's right.
They've been scrubbed off.
There's nothing on this tape that can identify who's holding that gun.
But I wanna know who's holding that gun.
Don't we know who's holding that gun?
- (WHISPERS) You. - It's not me.
Why would I bring it in here if it was me?
To cover your ass.
I thought you were worried about someone tracing this back to you.
But, no, he was hoping that we'd find the serial numbers.
Yes, like I said before,
I need to know who's behind this.
Yeah, that's tough.
There has to be some other way.
Has to be.
All right. Start it from the beginning.
- (TAPE REWINDING) - (SIGHS)
Stop. There.
What is that?
Okay, that's a slate. When you're making a movie...
In the reflection.
Behind the camera.
That's a face.
Or a coffee pot.
I don't know. I think he might be right. The resolution's completely deteriorated.
Maybe if we did a pixel recalibration.
- Oh. Yeah. - Can you do it?
- Give us a minute. - Give us a minute.
What's down there?
An extrapolator.
A what?
I told you we could make things worse.
No!
(SCREAMING)
(GRUNTS)
(BUZZING)
It's the same.
You have to.
You're the only one I can count on to do what I say.
Look, Tracy.
It's like what Mary Poppins says in The Sound of Music,
(LAUGHS)
"When God closes a door, He always opens up a window."
You're right.
I used to love Mary Poppins.
(SNIFFLING)
(SIGHS)
Thanks, Eugene.
What the heck?
- I'm sorry. I just thought that... - You like me?
Yeah.
Wait.
You're not mad?
Yes, I'm mad. Mad that you didn't say anything!
- What? - I like you, too.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
- I feel like singing. - Me, too.
(SINGING) Closing time
One last call for alcohol so finish your whisky or beer
BOTH: Closing time
You don't have to go home but you can't stay here
I know who I want to take me home
Take me home
(LAUGHS)
- Why are you crying now? - I'm just...
Happy.
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
(TOILET FLUSHING)
Oh...
Is someone in there?
I wish you'd told me how you felt sooner, Eugene.
I kind of already promised myself to someone else.
What?
Who?
God.
(DOOR OPENS)
Eugene. I didn't know you were here.
Preacher?
How you doing?
Tracy tells me you got a big chemistry test coming up this week.
You gonna be ready?
Yeah. I think so.
Good. That goes for you, too, Tracy.
The more effort you guys put in now,
the more options you're gonna have later on in life.
(LAUGHS) I do most of my homework on the bus on the way home from school.
'Course you do.
Tracy.
Preacher's not God.
He is to me.
No.
No, guys...
Cut it out! Guys!
Cut it out!
No!
No, I said stop!
Stop!
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
TERRI: Eugene? I called your father! He's gonna be very upset with you!
- (KNOCKING CONTINUES) - Finish the job.
Eugene!
Go on, Eugene. Finish the job.
Uh-huh.
That's right.
Ah. Yeah. Oh, that's right.
Go on.
I told you I was gonna come for you, Eugene.
And I'm coming right now!
(SCREAMING)
(GUNSHOT)
CASSIDY: All right.
- (DENIS COUGHING) - All right, here we go. Bit of ginger ale.
(MURMURING)
(HACKING)
Whoa. Oh, dear God.
Poor fella. Come here.
All right, mate.
(SPITTING)
You all right?
Come on, let's get that out the way. Come on, mate.
Hard to recuperate when you're inhaling the smell of your own sick.
My God.
All right, let me get that for you.
Papa.
Papa, please.
(DOOR CLOSING)
(SIGHING)
HITLER: Are you okay?
You had to see for yourself.
You had to see.
Once they find out you are the mistake,
that is where they will put you.
And not just for an hour or two.
But forever.
I know. It's not fair.
Please give me a break.
What do you care about fair?
You have to trust me, Eugene.
I want to help you.
Help me?
Help me what?
To escape, of course.
(KNOCKING)
JENNY: Who is it?
Um... Your neighbor.
(DOOR UNLOCKING)
Who's out there with you?
Nobody. It's just me.
Is...
What do you want?
Um...
I'm just going round all the apartments and fixing up the holes.
If you want.
I thought you were my ex.
Come, come on in.
(TULIP CLEARS THROAT)
God.
I don't know why I'm praying when I know you're not there,
but if this is your plan for me
and you can hear me,
I'm asking for your help.
I gave up a piece of my soul to find you.
Don't let it be for nothing.
- Please. - (CLERK CLEARS THROAT)
Custer, Jesse. Please come to the Dork Docs.
Any luck?
Sorry, man. We've got nothing.
(EXHALES)
What?
We enlarged the image,
ran it through this pixel manipulator, but...
CLERK 2: He's right. It was a coffee pot.
I guess maybe they had coffee before they killed him.
Or after they killed him.
- Right. - Yeah.
Nothin'.
All this for nothin'.
Is there anything else we can help you with, sir?
Yeah, I'm looking for God! You seen him?
You got him back there?
I'm sorry.
Oh. Hey, your DVD.
Like you said, there's nothing on it.
(SHREDDING)
I was gonna do that sooner or later, but thank you.
You know, I heard the shooting was pretty bad.
Yeah. It was.
That why you got a gun?
Oh.
No. That's, um... For my ex.
Rodney can be unpredictable. (LAUGHS)
Where's all your furniture?
Mmm.
I just got here, so I had to leave kind of quick.
So, for now, it's just table, chairs, and an air mattress. (LAUGHS)
And a TV.
Oh.
Right. Creature comforts.
Yeah.
Boo Berry.
Oh.
Yeah, my favorite.
Me, too.
Count Chocula can suck it.
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
I'm Tulip.
Um...
Jenny.
Yeah, so...
You can let it set an hour, maybe.
Then you can sand, paint, whatever.
Thanks, again.
Mmm.
You ever put on a bullet-proof vest and get shot in the chest?
I can't say that I have.
Hmm.
But it sounds fun.
It is.
(JENNY LAUGHS)
We should go sometime.
I'd like that.
(PHONE RINGING)
SEAMUS: What?
Hey, it's Proinsias.
What do you want? Money?
It's good to hear your voice, Seamus.
I have no patience for your dancing about. How much this time?
No, I'm not looking for your handouts.
No? Then what?
I have a son.
Well, I imagine you have dozens, but congratulations.
No, look, it's not like that.
Look, Denis is not new, all right? He's old.
And he's sick.
How well do you know him?
I just told you he's me son, didn't I?
You know what I'm asking. What's he like? What's his prevailing temperament?
How well do you know him, Proinsias?
I know that he's dyin', Seamus, all right?
I know that much.
Don't do it. Let him die.
(DENIS WHEEZING AND COUGHING)
(SINGING) Way down in Tipperary where cow plop is thick
Where women are young and the lads all come quick
There lived pretty Charlotte the girl we adore
The pride of dear Erin the scarlet-haired whore
It's Scarlet the harlot the girl we adore
The pride of dear Erin
The scarlet-haired whore
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)