1 00:00:01,986 --> 00:00:04,019 Would you like to dance with me? 2 00:00:04,087 --> 00:00:06,232 Don't struggle with me. CATHCART: There has been an unfortunate accident. 3 00:00:06,256 --> 00:00:07,851 He raped and murdered her. 4 00:00:07,875 --> 00:00:11,693 Drop it, son, and you won't have to fly any more missions. 5 00:00:11,762 --> 00:00:14,762 We are privileged to welcome General Scheisskopf. 6 00:00:14,831 --> 00:00:16,148 Jesus. Why? 7 00:00:16,216 --> 00:00:18,511 He's running the whole Mediterranean Theater. 8 00:00:18,535 --> 00:00:20,647 He will not be running this base. 9 00:00:20,671 --> 00:00:24,739 He is wrong when he says I will not be running this base. 10 00:00:24,808 --> 00:00:27,425 Anyone who knows me knows I simply just can't help myself. 11 00:00:27,494 --> 00:00:29,734 I have Yossarian's discharge papers here. 12 00:00:29,763 --> 00:00:31,897 What was that? Yossarian, sir. 13 00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:33,460 I've flown my missions, sir. 14 00:00:33,484 --> 00:00:35,701 The mission quota is 55, you've flown 51. 15 00:00:35,770 --> 00:00:38,098 Colonel Cathcart and I had a deal. 16 00:00:38,122 --> 00:00:39,771 My wife sends her regards. 17 00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:43,424 Decent folk, they deserve more votes than drifters, whores. 18 00:00:43,493 --> 00:00:46,105 I'm losing my mind. You gotta get me a private room. 19 00:00:46,129 --> 00:00:47,595 Don't push it. 20 00:00:47,664 --> 00:00:51,250 I think maybe you and I are the only two sane people on this base. 21 00:00:51,318 --> 00:00:53,168 Nately's dead. If I hadn't gone back... 22 00:00:53,236 --> 00:00:54,630 No, you didn't kill him. 23 00:00:54,654 --> 00:00:57,239 He died because there's men down there shooting at us. 24 00:00:57,307 --> 00:01:00,325 Dunbar's gone. Clevinger's gone. 25 00:01:00,393 --> 00:01:03,244 Kid Sampson's gone. McWatt's gone. 26 00:01:03,313 --> 00:01:05,013 Now, Nately's gone. 27 00:01:05,082 --> 00:01:06,943 For a minute there, I thought it was just going to be me and Aarfy. 28 00:01:06,967 --> 00:01:08,562 I wouldn't do that to you, buddy. 29 00:01:08,586 --> 00:01:10,906 Buckle up, fellas. Here come the fireworks. 30 00:01:13,991 --> 00:01:16,057 I think I lost my balls. We're going down. 31 00:01:16,126 --> 00:01:18,887 I'm right behind you. I'm gonna get it out over the sea. 32 00:01:30,124 --> 00:01:31,124 Help! 33 00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:36,929 Hello? 34 00:01:44,138 --> 00:01:45,178 My balls. 35 00:01:51,628 --> 00:01:52,794 Sweet Jesus. 36 00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:49,502 Hello? 37 00:03:09,289 --> 00:03:10,289 Hello? 38 00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:20,933 Hello? 39 00:04:10,868 --> 00:04:11,883 Oh, Christ. 40 00:04:18,775 --> 00:04:19,775 God. 41 00:04:21,228 --> 00:04:22,510 How bad is it, Doc? 42 00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:33,171 Sorry. What? Have I lost my balls? 43 00:04:36,126 --> 00:04:39,093 I don't understand you. Do you speak English? 44 00:04:39,162 --> 00:04:41,296 Inglese? No, no. Italiano. 45 00:04:42,099 --> 00:04:43,099 Inglese? 46 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:47,836 No? No? 47 00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:49,538 Christ. 48 00:04:51,775 --> 00:04:52,874 Hey, can I... 49 00:04:55,112 --> 00:04:56,878 Hey, Doc. You see this? 50 00:04:56,947 --> 00:04:58,045 Uno... 51 00:04:59,933 --> 00:05:01,149 Due. 52 00:05:03,921 --> 00:05:06,354 Down here. Due? 53 00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,374 Si, si. Due. 54 00:05:09,442 --> 00:05:11,609 Due? Two? I've got due balls? 55 00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:18,166 Oh, God. Thank Christ. Thank God. I've got two. 56 00:05:22,088 --> 00:05:24,539 Yeah, due balls. I got due. 57 00:05:27,444 --> 00:05:29,945 Yeah, okay. Sure. You do whatever you got to do, Doc. 58 00:05:31,148 --> 00:05:32,480 Due. 59 00:05:37,904 --> 00:05:38,904 Christ! 60 00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:18,693 Oh, Christ. 61 00:06:33,110 --> 00:06:34,408 Oh, my God. 62 00:07:25,729 --> 00:07:27,395 Buongiorno. 63 00:07:27,464 --> 00:07:29,231 Buongiorno, signore. 64 00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:37,606 Buongiorno. 65 00:07:37,674 --> 00:07:40,441 Buongiorno. 66 00:08:11,942 --> 00:08:14,142 If you want, but I'm not pressuring you. 67 00:08:25,271 --> 00:08:27,038 What? I don't understand what you're saying. 68 00:08:59,055 --> 00:09:00,972 Ciao, YoYo. Bionguorno. 69 00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:02,674 Buongiorno, Silvio. 70 00:10:21,521 --> 00:10:22,587 Are you an American? 71 00:10:23,656 --> 00:10:27,025 No Inglese. No Inglese, Italiano. 72 00:10:27,894 --> 00:10:28,937 Is this the American? 73 00:10:37,854 --> 00:10:38,854 Yossarian. 74 00:10:41,908 --> 00:10:43,074 No. 75 00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:54,201 Seven-inch swing. Four-inch gap. Why is that so hard? 76 00:10:54,271 --> 00:10:58,490 Then we look tight. Then we look fierce. 77 00:10:58,558 --> 00:11:01,809 Then we stand out from all the goddamn free-swinging arms 78 00:11:01,878 --> 00:11:04,398 that seem to be the goddamn fashion these days. 79 00:11:06,950 --> 00:11:10,785 You goddamn spastics think I'm gonna let you prance around here 80 00:11:10,853 --> 00:11:12,954 like a Busby Berkeley chorus line, 81 00:11:14,124 --> 00:11:15,964 you've got another thing coming to you. 82 00:11:20,197 --> 00:11:22,625 All right. Let's have a look at these nuts. 83 00:11:22,649 --> 00:11:25,816 You're gonna need to scooch and lift. 84 00:11:25,885 --> 00:11:27,045 Okay. 85 00:11:39,115 --> 00:11:40,726 Ow! 86 00:11:40,750 --> 00:11:43,110 Sorry. It's just a little dried blood. 87 00:11:44,754 --> 00:11:47,087 Okay. All right. 88 00:11:48,291 --> 00:11:49,571 Let's have a look at these. 89 00:11:50,910 --> 00:11:54,011 Now, John, it looks like this piece of flak 90 00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:56,914 went right between your thighs. 91 00:11:56,983 --> 00:11:59,650 It missed your left testicle, it missed your right testicle, 92 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:03,154 and it split the soft tissue of your scrotum right between your testicles 93 00:12:03,223 --> 00:12:05,924 and that is what we call spectacular luck. 94 00:12:05,992 --> 00:12:09,293 So can I go home now? Is it that kind of spectacular luck? 95 00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:11,312 You came so close. 96 00:12:11,381 --> 00:12:13,461 Now, if you lose a testicle for your country, 97 00:12:13,516 --> 00:12:14,815 of course, you get to go home. 98 00:12:14,884 --> 00:12:18,186 But you? You only almost lost a testicle. 99 00:12:18,254 --> 00:12:19,470 You see the difference? 100 00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:21,150 The best I can do for an almost-lost testicle 101 00:12:21,174 --> 00:12:23,235 is just to keep you here while it's healing. 102 00:12:23,259 --> 00:12:24,658 Of course, while it's healing, 103 00:12:24,727 --> 00:12:27,006 the number of missions you have to fly keeps rising. 104 00:12:27,030 --> 00:12:28,707 Which means the longer you're here, 105 00:12:28,731 --> 00:12:30,242 the further away you get from going home. 106 00:12:30,266 --> 00:12:31,598 But you already know that. 107 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:35,819 All right, nurse, I'll leave you to it. 108 00:12:39,442 --> 00:12:41,208 "Spectacular luck," huh? 109 00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:44,555 I'm the luckiest guy in the world. 110 00:12:45,732 --> 00:12:48,165 Who knew it was as simple as one testicle? 111 00:12:48,234 --> 00:12:50,954 We probably could have arranged for that months ago. 112 00:12:52,255 --> 00:12:53,654 I like the way you think. 113 00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,040 What time do you ship out? 114 00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:04,298 6:00 a.m. Ugh, that's ghastly. 115 00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:06,367 Oh, it is. It's ghastly, all right. 116 00:13:08,371 --> 00:13:11,171 I'd tell you I'm gonna miss you, but I probably won't. 117 00:13:11,241 --> 00:13:13,452 You're gonna miss me a lot more than I'm gonna miss you. 118 00:13:13,476 --> 00:13:14,476 I doubt it. 119 00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:18,424 Do you want to put money on it? 120 00:13:18,448 --> 00:13:20,481 Sure. Five dollars. 121 00:13:21,817 --> 00:13:24,585 What? $5? What are you, cheap? 122 00:13:24,654 --> 00:13:27,154 One hundred. I'm not putting $100. 123 00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:29,457 You don't have $100. I won't need it. 124 00:13:29,525 --> 00:13:31,492 Yes, you will. No, I won't. 125 00:13:31,561 --> 00:13:32,627 You're silly. 126 00:13:33,496 --> 00:13:34,607 No, I'm not. 127 00:13:34,631 --> 00:13:35,631 Mmm-hmm. 128 00:13:46,842 --> 00:13:47,975 Mmm. 129 00:13:50,146 --> 00:13:52,586 I like the way your neck smells. 130 00:13:55,184 --> 00:13:57,624 I like the way your hair smells. 131 00:13:59,955 --> 00:14:02,236 I like the way your shoulders smell. 132 00:14:14,304 --> 00:14:15,914 Better start saving your pennies. 133 00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:25,313 Buongiorno, Mr. YoYo. We have a gift for you. 134 00:14:25,381 --> 00:14:26,875 Hey, fellas, what's the rumpus? 135 00:14:26,899 --> 00:14:30,318 Is from Mr. Milo. Is he back? I need to talk to him. 136 00:14:30,386 --> 00:14:33,754 No, no. Mr. Milo in Togo. When is he back? 137 00:14:33,823 --> 00:14:35,283 Sabato. Saturday. 138 00:14:35,307 --> 00:14:37,052 Well, can you get him on the radio? I need to talk to him. 139 00:14:37,076 --> 00:14:40,071 He offered me a job. I said no, but now I think I need to say yes. 140 00:14:40,095 --> 00:14:42,964 Eh... No, no. He on a ship. He sent you this. 141 00:14:44,367 --> 00:14:47,001 This for your testicolo. 142 00:14:47,070 --> 00:14:49,771 It's very big room. 143 00:14:49,839 --> 00:14:53,574 For testicolo, no? Yes, because no want... 144 00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:55,643 It's very bad... For your balls. 145 00:15:16,766 --> 00:15:18,046 Over here, tootsie. 146 00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:25,440 Nice pants. 147 00:15:34,968 --> 00:15:36,778 I'm told this is Cathcart's office now. 148 00:15:36,802 --> 00:15:38,202 Yes, sir. 149 00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:39,848 Where's Major Major gone? He's in there too, sir. 150 00:15:39,872 --> 00:15:41,516 They're in there together? Yes, sir. 151 00:15:41,540 --> 00:15:43,135 Can I go in? That depends. 152 00:15:43,159 --> 00:15:46,159 Depends on what? Depends on who you're here to see. 153 00:15:46,879 --> 00:15:49,163 Cathcart? Fine. 154 00:15:49,232 --> 00:15:52,011 I told you the deal's off, Yossarian. I know the deal's off. 155 00:15:52,035 --> 00:15:53,361 Hiya, Major. Hey, Yossarian. 156 00:15:53,385 --> 00:15:55,030 How you been? Pretty swell. 157 00:15:55,054 --> 00:15:58,138 Then what is it that you want? I want to go home. You owe me. 158 00:15:58,207 --> 00:15:59,841 I just told you the deal is off. 159 00:15:59,909 --> 00:16:01,558 Scheisskopf saw to that. You were there. 160 00:16:01,627 --> 00:16:03,755 But I didn't make the deal with Scheisskopf. I made it with you. 161 00:16:03,779 --> 00:16:05,997 And he unmade it. My hands are tied. 162 00:16:06,065 --> 00:16:09,667 I've had my balls blown off. I want you to send me home. 163 00:16:09,736 --> 00:16:11,819 I can't. What do you mean, you can't? 164 00:16:11,888 --> 00:16:14,072 Yes, you can. I mean that I can't. 165 00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:15,506 I'd like to, believe me. 166 00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:17,736 I'd like to see you gone from here as much as you would. 167 00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:19,480 Then do it. I can't, son. 168 00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:20,845 You mean to tell me 169 00:16:20,914 --> 00:16:22,290 that you don't have the authority to send people home? 170 00:16:22,314 --> 00:16:23,914 I have the authority to send people home. 171 00:16:23,950 --> 00:16:25,516 I just can't send you home. 172 00:16:25,584 --> 00:16:28,119 I am under strict instructions not to send you home 173 00:16:28,187 --> 00:16:29,419 without his prior approval. 174 00:16:29,488 --> 00:16:31,455 He actually said that? He did. 175 00:16:31,524 --> 00:16:33,886 But I've had my balls blown off. What more does it take? 176 00:16:33,910 --> 00:16:35,476 This is a medical emergency. 177 00:16:35,545 --> 00:16:37,989 Well, if it's a medical emergency, I suggest you go talk to Doc Daneeka. 178 00:16:38,013 --> 00:16:39,680 Do I look like a ball doctor to you? 179 00:16:41,350 --> 00:16:43,462 You understand? That's two doses every two hours. 180 00:16:43,486 --> 00:16:45,352 Okay. Doctor. Hey, I need your help. 181 00:16:45,421 --> 00:16:47,849 You gotta tell Scheisskopf that I've had my balls blown off. 182 00:16:47,873 --> 00:16:49,473 But you haven't had your balls blown off. 183 00:16:49,542 --> 00:16:51,953 Doesn't matter. He needs to think that they've been blown off. 184 00:16:51,977 --> 00:16:54,478 You're asking me to lie to a guy that we both know is trouble? 185 00:16:54,547 --> 00:16:55,957 No, I'm not asking you to lie. 186 00:16:55,981 --> 00:16:57,693 I'm asking you to use your imagination. 187 00:16:57,717 --> 00:17:01,201 You know that if I stay here, Scheisskopf is gonna fuck me. 188 00:17:01,270 --> 00:17:03,403 I've lost all my friends. 189 00:17:03,472 --> 00:17:06,107 I've flown more missions than anybody on this base, 190 00:17:06,175 --> 00:17:08,370 and every time I get close to reaching the quota, 191 00:17:08,394 --> 00:17:10,978 they raise it on me to fuck me. 192 00:17:11,046 --> 00:17:12,346 I can't do this anymore. 193 00:17:13,683 --> 00:17:16,027 I get that you couldn't ground me for insanity. 194 00:17:16,051 --> 00:17:19,164 I get that you couldn't ground me for liver problems that never existed. 195 00:17:19,188 --> 00:17:24,007 But now I finally have a legitimate, actual medical complaint. 196 00:17:24,076 --> 00:17:27,144 And you promised to help me when it counted. 197 00:17:27,213 --> 00:17:30,698 I'm not asking you to lie. I'm asking you to be a doctor. 198 00:17:35,738 --> 00:17:39,290 Sir, Captain Yossarian suffered a catastrophic testicular infarction. 199 00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:41,436 A what? A catastrophic testicular infarction. 200 00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:42,826 What the hell is that? 201 00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:45,746 Well, sir, it's a soft tissue trauma to the scrotal sac. 202 00:17:45,815 --> 00:17:47,048 And? 203 00:17:47,116 --> 00:17:49,962 And I believe Captain Yossarian should be sent home. 204 00:17:49,986 --> 00:17:51,769 It's that bad? 205 00:17:51,838 --> 00:17:54,055 He may never have children. 206 00:17:54,123 --> 00:17:56,307 You're saying he's had his balls blown off? 207 00:17:56,375 --> 00:17:57,519 Approximately, sir. 208 00:17:57,543 --> 00:17:59,310 Mmm. 209 00:17:59,379 --> 00:18:01,879 I don't know, Doc. If I'd had my balls blown off, 210 00:18:01,948 --> 00:18:04,409 I can't imagine I'd be standing there, just like that. 211 00:18:04,433 --> 00:18:05,967 And at attention, no less. 212 00:18:06,035 --> 00:18:08,075 Well, he's heavily medicated right now, sir. 213 00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:10,121 I want to see. 214 00:18:11,373 --> 00:18:14,275 Excuse me, sir? I want to see. 215 00:18:14,343 --> 00:18:17,944 I want to understand this infarction. 216 00:18:19,048 --> 00:18:20,197 Drop your pants, soldier. 217 00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:21,943 I'm not sure that's such a good idea, sir. 218 00:18:21,967 --> 00:18:23,334 He's very tender down there. 219 00:18:23,403 --> 00:18:26,036 I want to see. Drop your pants, soldier. 220 00:18:38,417 --> 00:18:39,750 Take the bandage off. 221 00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:12,463 I'm counting two testicles down here, Doc. 222 00:19:15,288 --> 00:19:17,087 I want these stitches out, God damn it. 223 00:19:17,157 --> 00:19:19,172 I want this nutsack back in the air, 224 00:19:19,241 --> 00:19:20,719 flying missions, and serving his country 225 00:19:20,743 --> 00:19:23,010 like everybody else, God damn it. 226 00:19:23,079 --> 00:19:24,645 Hike up your pants, soldier. 227 00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:39,176 Who are you? 228 00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:41,512 I'm Nurse Cramer. 229 00:19:44,450 --> 00:19:45,849 Is Sue Ann not working today? 230 00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:48,519 Nurse Duckett's gone. 231 00:19:51,391 --> 00:19:53,351 Where? Gone home. 232 00:19:56,462 --> 00:19:58,312 To the nurses' quarters? 233 00:19:58,380 --> 00:20:00,700 No, she's gone home. Her tour finished. 234 00:20:05,104 --> 00:20:06,104 When? 235 00:20:06,171 --> 00:20:07,904 She left this morning. 236 00:20:14,330 --> 00:20:17,275 She didn't say anything. We treat a lot of soldiers here. 237 00:20:17,299 --> 00:20:19,819 She's not about to say goodbye to all of them. 238 00:20:19,969 --> 00:20:23,003 Right. Let's have a look at these testicles. 239 00:20:25,575 --> 00:20:30,077 Okay. Looks like you're good to go. 240 00:21:07,433 --> 00:21:08,565 Sorry, sir. 241 00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:13,370 What's your name? Snowden, sir. 242 00:21:13,439 --> 00:21:15,519 What's your first name? Christopher, sir. 243 00:21:16,225 --> 00:21:17,225 I'm John. 244 00:21:18,895 --> 00:21:20,143 This your first mission? 245 00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:24,714 Yes, sir. This is my first mission. 246 00:21:27,370 --> 00:21:28,410 Take a breath, son. 247 00:21:33,108 --> 00:21:36,159 You're gonna be fine, okay? 248 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:38,996 Let's go. It'll be fun. 249 00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,079 Yes, sir. 250 00:21:59,401 --> 00:22:00,567 Hey, where you going? 251 00:22:04,006 --> 00:22:06,240 I'm a tail gunner. 252 00:22:06,308 --> 00:22:08,008 There's nothing to shoot at. 253 00:22:08,077 --> 00:22:10,911 There's no Germans in the air. It's just us. 254 00:22:10,980 --> 00:22:14,220 Have a seat by that window over there. You'll be all right. 255 00:22:16,585 --> 00:22:17,865 Just stay out of that tail. 256 00:22:18,705 --> 00:22:19,705 Yes, sir. 257 00:22:37,456 --> 00:22:39,976 Coming up on two minutes out. 258 00:22:42,462 --> 00:22:43,794 4,000 feet. 259 00:22:46,516 --> 00:22:48,882 See the target on the left? See that? 260 00:22:52,237 --> 00:22:53,237 I got it. 261 00:23:04,733 --> 00:23:05,733 Here we go. 262 00:23:06,469 --> 00:23:08,068 Holding steady. 263 00:23:08,137 --> 00:23:11,071 You lined up, Yossarian? Yes, I'm fucking lined up. 264 00:23:11,139 --> 00:23:12,899 That's the wrong bridge. 265 00:23:19,314 --> 00:23:21,793 Hey, what happened back there? The right engine is hit. We're hit. 266 00:23:21,817 --> 00:23:24,134 Help him. Help him. 267 00:23:24,203 --> 00:23:26,303 Help him. Help who? 268 00:23:26,372 --> 00:23:28,305 The bombardier. Help him. 269 00:23:28,374 --> 00:23:31,508 Help the bombardier. I'm the bombardier. 270 00:23:31,577 --> 00:23:33,844 Then help him. Help him. 271 00:23:33,912 --> 00:23:35,613 Help who? Who is this? 272 00:23:35,681 --> 00:23:38,849 Side gunner. The kid. The new kid. Help him. 273 00:23:44,073 --> 00:23:45,233 Where the hell you going? 274 00:23:55,401 --> 00:23:57,050 Okay, okay. 275 00:23:59,538 --> 00:24:00,538 I'm cold. 276 00:24:03,759 --> 00:24:06,293 You're gonna be all right, okay? 277 00:24:06,362 --> 00:24:08,295 You're gonna be all right. 278 00:24:17,055 --> 00:24:18,055 Shit. 279 00:24:19,759 --> 00:24:20,799 I'm cold. 280 00:24:21,644 --> 00:24:23,160 Well, we're gonna get you warm. 281 00:24:25,714 --> 00:24:27,747 Okay, look. 282 00:24:28,984 --> 00:24:31,885 It's ugly, but it's not as ugly as it looks. 283 00:24:31,954 --> 00:24:33,871 There's no arteries cut so you're not gonna die. 284 00:24:33,939 --> 00:24:37,574 But I'm cold. That's a good sign, you know. 285 00:24:37,643 --> 00:24:41,578 It's a sign that your body is responding properly, 286 00:24:43,131 --> 00:24:45,732 and it's sending the warmth to your leg. 287 00:24:46,769 --> 00:24:48,401 But your brain doesn't know it. 288 00:24:52,842 --> 00:24:54,808 It's all right. It's all right. 289 00:24:56,345 --> 00:24:58,823 What did you say your name was? 290 00:24:58,847 --> 00:25:01,514 It's John. John Yossarian. 291 00:25:02,318 --> 00:25:03,683 John Yossarian. 292 00:25:08,790 --> 00:25:10,006 Okay. Look at me. 293 00:25:12,411 --> 00:25:13,411 Fuck. 294 00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:16,240 Hey, can somebody help me here? 295 00:25:20,486 --> 00:25:22,886 This is a good bandage. Okay? 296 00:25:22,955 --> 00:25:24,388 This is gonna get you home safe. 297 00:25:29,795 --> 00:25:31,161 My dad's a dentist. 298 00:25:31,230 --> 00:25:33,797 Yeah, I knew it. He's gonna be glad to have you back. 299 00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:36,950 Okay, look at me. Look at me. 300 00:25:38,537 --> 00:25:39,664 We're gonna get you back on land. 301 00:25:39,688 --> 00:25:41,404 Doc Daneeka's gonna make you right as rain. 302 00:25:44,710 --> 00:25:45,710 Okay. 303 00:25:47,413 --> 00:25:48,413 Let's get you up. 304 00:25:49,582 --> 00:25:50,622 Come on. Let's get you up. 305 00:25:55,821 --> 00:25:56,821 Shit. 306 00:25:58,890 --> 00:25:59,890 Shit. 307 00:26:08,667 --> 00:26:10,083 Look at me. Please. 308 00:26:18,493 --> 00:26:20,493 Okay. Okay. 309 00:26:22,014 --> 00:26:23,547 Okay. 310 00:26:23,616 --> 00:26:24,882 Keep your eyes on me. 311 00:26:24,950 --> 00:26:27,951 Okay. Keep your eyes right on me. Okay. 312 00:26:28,020 --> 00:26:31,354 All right. Okay, now, stay down. 313 00:26:31,424 --> 00:26:32,601 We're just gonna get you comfortable. 314 00:26:32,625 --> 00:26:33,869 Okay. Okay. 315 00:26:33,893 --> 00:26:35,692 Okay. Okay. 316 00:26:35,761 --> 00:26:38,462 Nice and comfortable. Nice and comfortable, okay? 317 00:26:38,531 --> 00:26:40,931 Hey. Nice and comfortable. 318 00:26:42,802 --> 00:26:45,035 Nice and comfortable. Nice and comfortable. 319 00:26:54,463 --> 00:26:55,929 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 320 00:30:27,976 --> 00:30:28,976 Yossarian. 321 00:30:30,845 --> 00:30:33,146 You okay? Hi, Chaplain. 322 00:30:34,116 --> 00:30:35,748 I'm fine. 323 00:30:35,817 --> 00:30:39,137 We had a hairy run, we lost a man, but other than that I'm fine. 324 00:30:40,021 --> 00:30:41,254 You're covered in blood. 325 00:30:42,624 --> 00:30:43,784 It's not mine. 326 00:30:45,627 --> 00:30:48,462 Do you want... Can I get you some clothes? 327 00:30:48,530 --> 00:30:49,929 No, I'm fine, thanks. 328 00:30:50,932 --> 00:30:52,052 How are you? 329 00:30:52,934 --> 00:30:56,069 I'm... Fine. I'm good. 330 00:30:56,138 --> 00:30:57,258 That's good. 331 00:30:59,308 --> 00:31:00,474 Who did you lose? 332 00:31:01,343 --> 00:31:02,642 He was a new kid. 333 00:31:03,612 --> 00:31:04,892 Might not have known him yet. 334 00:31:08,617 --> 00:31:10,950 Where are you off to? I'm heading home. 335 00:31:13,188 --> 00:31:14,354 Can I get you anything? 336 00:31:14,990 --> 00:31:16,270 No, thank you. 337 00:31:56,748 --> 00:31:59,582 None of us can say we really knew Christopher. 338 00:32:01,370 --> 00:32:03,370 But we know the kind of boy he was. 339 00:32:04,940 --> 00:32:07,941 A boy willing to put himself in the path of danger. 340 00:32:09,745 --> 00:32:13,063 A boy barely out of school. 341 00:32:13,131 --> 00:32:15,999 Willing to leave his family and all that he held dear. 342 00:32:16,068 --> 00:32:17,068 All that was safe. 343 00:32:19,471 --> 00:32:21,104 All that was familiar. 344 00:32:24,276 --> 00:32:27,410 To come to a place where those things would seem like a dream. 345 00:32:30,448 --> 00:32:32,208 But there was a bigger dream. 346 00:32:34,052 --> 00:32:36,319 To liberate a world beset by darkness. 347 00:32:39,608 --> 00:32:41,992 Christopher Snowden shared that dream... 348 00:32:43,979 --> 00:32:45,044 With all of us. 349 00:32:47,833 --> 00:32:51,668 When I came here, I knew this would be one of my duties, this. 350 00:32:54,790 --> 00:32:56,590 But nobody really dies here. 351 00:32:58,994 --> 00:33:00,293 They just vanish. They... 352 00:33:02,997 --> 00:33:04,497 They vanish into the sky. 353 00:33:08,003 --> 00:33:11,138 So, I do services, not burials. 354 00:33:12,174 --> 00:33:13,240 Services. 355 00:33:15,577 --> 00:33:17,244 But, thankfully, not today. 356 00:33:17,312 --> 00:33:19,257 We'll keep Christopher Snowden here. 357 00:33:19,281 --> 00:33:21,159 We'll know where he is. We'll know where to find him. 358 00:33:21,183 --> 00:33:24,084 We'll lament that the life he lived 359 00:33:24,153 --> 00:33:26,097 did not turn out to be the life he should have lived. 360 00:33:26,121 --> 00:33:27,921 He was 18. 361 00:33:27,990 --> 00:33:30,234 He didn't get to know the love of a wife. 362 00:33:30,258 --> 00:33:34,527 Or children. That they loved him. They longed for his return. 363 00:33:35,430 --> 00:33:36,963 Just as he longs for them. 364 00:33:42,070 --> 00:33:43,436 Mmm. 365 00:33:43,505 --> 00:33:48,074 Nevertheless, he was greatly loved and will be greatly missed. 366 00:33:48,143 --> 00:33:51,327 Let us pray for his parents, Raymond and Elizabeth. 367 00:33:51,396 --> 00:33:54,130 Hey. What are you doing in a tree? 368 00:33:54,199 --> 00:33:55,298 Oh, hi, Milo. 369 00:33:55,867 --> 00:33:57,147 Can I come up? 370 00:34:00,505 --> 00:34:03,573 Hey, I heard about your protest. Good for you. 371 00:34:03,641 --> 00:34:04,852 This isn't a protest. 372 00:34:04,876 --> 00:34:06,909 Well, good for you. 373 00:34:09,698 --> 00:34:11,832 Whose funeral? 374 00:34:11,900 --> 00:34:14,679 They're burying that kid that got killed in my plane the other day. 375 00:34:14,703 --> 00:34:15,863 What happened to him? 376 00:34:17,422 --> 00:34:18,521 He got killed. 377 00:34:22,744 --> 00:34:24,844 I heard your deal with Cathcart fell through. 378 00:34:25,747 --> 00:34:27,047 You're not going home? 379 00:34:32,888 --> 00:34:34,153 Did you hear about Orr? 380 00:34:35,023 --> 00:34:36,823 He turned up in Sweden. 381 00:34:41,429 --> 00:34:43,463 His body? No. 382 00:34:43,532 --> 00:34:46,199 Alive and well. Apparently, he rowed there. 383 00:34:47,886 --> 00:34:49,953 I don't know. They're saying that's what he did. 384 00:34:51,523 --> 00:34:53,234 Who's saying? Where did you hear this? 385 00:34:53,258 --> 00:34:54,691 Somebody heard it from somebody. 386 00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:56,271 They're all talking about it down there. 387 00:34:56,295 --> 00:34:58,895 If you weren't running around naked, you might have heard it, too. 388 00:35:00,399 --> 00:35:01,531 Hey, good for him. 389 00:35:07,606 --> 00:35:08,646 He'll be all right. 390 00:35:10,708 --> 00:35:11,774 Hey. 391 00:35:12,777 --> 00:35:14,243 Hey, where are you going? 392 00:35:16,481 --> 00:35:18,481 Hey, you're gonna come work with me, right? 393 00:35:20,051 --> 00:35:21,418 We'd be unstoppable. 394 00:35:23,355 --> 00:35:26,572 And during the long winter of 1777, 395 00:35:26,658 --> 00:35:30,494 a Prussian nobleman by the name of Baron von Steuben 396 00:35:30,562 --> 00:35:34,364 aided George Washington greatly in teaching musket drill 397 00:35:34,433 --> 00:35:37,333 to a small unit of 100 soldiers. 398 00:35:37,402 --> 00:35:42,105 Those soldiers taught the remaining Continental Army at Valley Forge. 399 00:35:42,174 --> 00:35:47,410 And so, drill formation has a long and glorious history 400 00:35:47,479 --> 00:35:52,482 that is a living link to the days and the dreams of our Founding Fathers. 401 00:35:53,285 --> 00:35:54,884 And so, here today, 402 00:35:54,953 --> 00:35:59,088 with these shining blue skies that God has seen fit to deliver, 403 00:35:59,157 --> 00:36:02,525 we too are a part of that history. 404 00:36:05,247 --> 00:36:09,916 General Dreedle, commanding officer of the entire European operation, 405 00:36:09,984 --> 00:36:14,704 has come here all the way from London because he has heard about you men. 406 00:36:16,959 --> 00:36:18,458 And your tight formations. 407 00:36:19,861 --> 00:36:22,328 Your fiercely tight formations. 408 00:36:24,031 --> 00:36:25,631 And now, without further ado... 409 00:36:27,452 --> 00:36:28,492 Strike up the band. 410 00:36:29,671 --> 00:36:32,005 And let's start the parade! 411 00:36:52,878 --> 00:36:59,082 For uncommon valor, I hereby award you the Distinguished Flying Cross. 412 00:37:02,571 --> 00:37:04,854 This is Private First-Class James Marsh, sir. 413 00:37:05,557 --> 00:37:07,406 Step forward, Private. 414 00:37:09,244 --> 00:37:15,165 For uncommon valor, I hereby award you the Distinguished Flying Cross. 415 00:37:15,233 --> 00:37:16,933 Well, sir, you know what? 416 00:37:17,001 --> 00:37:19,168 I didn't do nothing my grandpappy didn't teach me. 417 00:37:19,237 --> 00:37:21,938 "Be a straight shooter. Be a straight talker. 418 00:37:22,007 --> 00:37:24,274 "Be a clean fighter," he always used to tell me. 419 00:37:24,342 --> 00:37:26,826 By golly, if I hadn't tried to abide by his advice... 420 00:37:26,894 --> 00:37:28,539 Thank you, Private. I didn't do nothing brave, though. 421 00:37:28,563 --> 00:37:31,241 I did what any other fellow... I'm sure you did. Good for you. 422 00:37:31,265 --> 00:37:32,565 It was like instinct. 423 00:38:00,195 --> 00:38:02,039 And who the hell is this? 424 00:38:02,063 --> 00:38:03,495 This is Yossarian, sir. 425 00:38:03,564 --> 00:38:05,309 I don't know what the hell he thinks he's doing. 426 00:38:05,333 --> 00:38:07,578 Is this some kind of a joke, soldier? What the hell is he doing here? 427 00:38:07,602 --> 00:38:10,381 Captain Yossarian is receiving the Distinguished Flying Cross, sir. 428 00:38:10,405 --> 00:38:12,505 Well, I'll be damned. 429 00:38:12,574 --> 00:38:14,958 Why aren't you wearing clothes, son? 430 00:38:15,027 --> 00:38:16,476 I don't wanna. 431 00:38:16,545 --> 00:38:17,855 What do you mean, you don't want to? 432 00:38:17,879 --> 00:38:19,845 Why the hell don't you want to? 433 00:38:19,914 --> 00:38:21,481 I just don't wanna. 434 00:38:21,549 --> 00:38:23,111 Why isn't he wearing clothes? Why isn't he wearing clothes? 435 00:38:23,135 --> 00:38:24,878 A man was killed in his plane and bled all over him. 436 00:38:24,902 --> 00:38:26,247 He swears he will never wear a uniform... 437 00:38:26,271 --> 00:38:27,448 A man was killed in his plane. He bled all over him, 438 00:38:27,472 --> 00:38:29,317 and he's left his clothes in the laundry. 439 00:38:29,341 --> 00:38:30,385 Where are his other uniforms? They're in the laundry as well, sir. 440 00:38:30,409 --> 00:38:31,468 What about his underwear? 441 00:38:31,492 --> 00:38:33,643 His underwear's in the laundry as well, sir. 442 00:38:33,712 --> 00:38:35,911 Sounds like a lot of crap to me. 443 00:38:35,980 --> 00:38:38,375 It is a lot of crap, sir. Don't worry, sir. 444 00:38:38,399 --> 00:38:40,745 I can promise you that I will personally punish this man. 445 00:38:40,769 --> 00:38:42,869 He will be thrashed within an inch of his life... 446 00:38:42,938 --> 00:38:44,798 What the hell do I care if he's punished or not? 447 00:38:44,822 --> 00:38:46,250 He's just won a medal, for Christ's sake. 448 00:38:46,274 --> 00:38:47,539 My sentiments exactly, sir. 449 00:38:47,608 --> 00:38:49,737 If he wants to receive it without any clothes on, 450 00:38:49,761 --> 00:38:51,171 what the hell business is it of yours? 451 00:38:51,195 --> 00:38:52,195 Did you win a medal? 452 00:38:53,197 --> 00:38:54,764 No, sir, I didn't win a medal. 453 00:38:56,634 --> 00:38:59,118 I commend your bravery, Captain. 454 00:38:59,187 --> 00:39:01,432 What did he do? CATHCART: He blew up a bridge in Ferrara, sir. 455 00:39:01,456 --> 00:39:03,101 Went over the target twice, under enemy fire, sir. 456 00:39:03,125 --> 00:39:05,470 So you're a pilot, son. He's a bombardier, sir. 457 00:39:05,494 --> 00:39:06,571 Why isn't the pilot getting a medal? 458 00:39:06,595 --> 00:39:07,805 Why isn't the pilot getting a medal? 459 00:39:07,829 --> 00:39:09,273 He died, sir. No, he didn't. 460 00:39:09,297 --> 00:39:10,408 Yes, he did. No, he didn't. 461 00:39:10,432 --> 00:39:12,276 Jesus Christ, I haven't got all day. 462 00:39:12,300 --> 00:39:14,178 I'm with you there, sir. You shut up. 463 00:39:14,202 --> 00:39:19,088 Soldier, for flying back over Ferrara to blow up a bridge under enemy fire, 464 00:39:19,157 --> 00:39:21,307 I hereby award you 465 00:39:23,011 --> 00:39:25,495 the Distinguished Flying Cross. 466 00:39:29,367 --> 00:39:30,367 Good work, son. 467 00:41:33,874 --> 00:41:34,890 Hi. 468 00:41:36,161 --> 00:41:37,721 I think I'm supposed to be in this tent. 469 00:41:39,614 --> 00:41:42,681 They said I'm supposed to be in tent 12. 470 00:41:49,958 --> 00:41:51,323 Are you Captain Yossarian? 471 00:41:52,276 --> 00:41:53,276 Yes, I am. 472 00:41:54,762 --> 00:41:55,995 Lieutenant Newman. 473 00:41:58,283 --> 00:41:59,283 Hi. 474 00:42:00,601 --> 00:42:01,700 Are you okay? 475 00:42:41,042 --> 00:42:43,176 YoYo, how are we looking down there? 476 00:42:43,244 --> 00:42:44,477 Almost there. 477 00:42:50,151 --> 00:42:51,151 And... 478 00:42:53,754 --> 00:42:54,754 Release. 479 00:43:09,937 --> 00:43:11,337 And release. 480 00:43:11,406 --> 00:43:15,040 ♪ Let's call it a day ♪ 481 00:43:16,411 --> 00:43:17,476 And release. 482 00:43:17,545 --> 00:43:21,447 ♪ Let us say ♪ 483 00:43:21,516 --> 00:43:26,185 ♪ That we just can't pretend ♪ 484 00:43:26,254 --> 00:43:30,889 ♪ And we know it's the end ♪ 485 00:43:30,958 --> 00:43:33,125 ♪ Why delay? ♪ 486 00:43:34,696 --> 00:43:40,199 ♪ Let's call it a day ♪ 487 00:43:41,936 --> 00:43:43,102 And release.