1
00:00:24,668 --> 00:00:27,918
Okay, yeah, Dad, just press the circle.
Just once. Just press it--

2
00:00:28,001 --> 00:00:30,209
-Okay, wait, tell me when we're going.

3
00:00:30,293 --> 00:00:31,876
-Okay. All right.
-Okay. Ready?

4
00:00:32,376 --> 00:00:36,168
{\an8}Okay. I know I have
some things to clear up, so…

5
00:00:37,668 --> 00:00:39,876
{\an8}I thought this is gonna be the best way.

6
00:00:41,251 --> 00:00:43,918
{\an8}If you don't like what I'm saying,
don't write in the comments

7
00:00:44,001 --> 00:00:47,084
{\an8}because I will not read it
and will not even care.

8
00:00:47,793 --> 00:00:49,834
{\an8}Okay, here we go.

9
00:00:49,918 --> 00:00:51,668
{\an8}

10
00:00:51,751 --> 00:00:55,376
When I moved to the US,
I knew fitting in was gonna be hard.

11
00:00:56,084 --> 00:00:59,668
I just didn't know
how bloody hard it was going to be.

12
00:00:59,751 --> 00:01:02,668
And all I wanted was to get invited
to the coolest club in town,

13
00:01:03,501 --> 00:01:04,918
Rock 'N' Bowl.

14
00:01:05,001 --> 00:01:06,501
But I never was.

15
00:01:06,584 --> 00:01:10,501
Anyone who was anyone was rolling
with their homies on a Saturday night.

16
00:01:10,584 --> 00:01:14,709
It was like basically a VMAs after-party.

17
00:01:15,209 --> 00:01:19,959
So when I turned 14, uh, yeah,
that's where I had my birthday.

18
00:01:20,043 --> 00:01:23,168
-Ah! It's an alien baby.
-Ew!

19
00:01:23,251 --> 00:01:27,168
That's gonna make me sick.
I think I'm gonna shit fireballs.

20
00:01:27,251 --> 00:01:30,751
Being there made me feel cool
for the first time in my life.

21
00:01:30,834 --> 00:01:31,876
Steph, you do one.

22
00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:34,126
I felt like
the kids I wanted to be.

23
00:01:34,209 --> 00:01:38,168
You know, the ones who seem immune
to that awkward teen phase…

24
00:01:38,251 --> 00:01:40,168
"
by The Platters plays]

25
00:01:40,251 --> 00:01:43,376
…the ones whose bones
have Jenga'd themselves into a hot frame.

26
00:01:43,459 --> 00:01:46,584
The only bumps on their skin are abs,

27
00:01:46,668 --> 00:01:51,834
and their natural scent is perfect,
like CK One perfect.

28
00:01:51,918 --> 00:01:53,418
-The populars.
-Been looking for you.

29
00:01:54,918 --> 00:01:57,168
'Sup, Blaine. Hey, Tiffany.

30
00:01:58,501 --> 00:02:01,251
I'm having a birthday party,
if you guys wanna join.

31
00:02:02,334 --> 00:02:03,334
Ooh, ooh.

32
00:02:03,418 --> 00:02:05,584
Cute that in Australia
you call it a party,

33
00:02:05,668 --> 00:02:09,251
'cause in America,
we call that a freak show.

34
00:02:09,334 --> 00:02:13,251
Well, um, it's actually not a freak show
'cause we have cake, so…

35
00:02:13,793 --> 00:02:14,793
Let's go.

36
00:02:15,668 --> 00:02:18,543
God, I just wanted
to be like them so bad.

37
00:02:18,626 --> 00:02:21,418
If they were this amazing in high school,

38
00:02:21,501 --> 00:02:24,209
imagine how perfect
the rest of their lives would be.

39
00:02:24,293 --> 00:02:28,668
-♪ Can make the darkness bright ♪

40
00:02:28,751 --> 00:02:31,168
Come on, Steph,
I wanna take more photos.

41
00:02:31,251 --> 00:02:33,168
-Come on, Bobby!

42
00:02:33,251 --> 00:02:34,626
You are too much.

43
00:02:34,709 --> 00:02:38,834
Guys! Could we just, like, try to be cool
for once?

44
00:02:41,334 --> 00:02:44,084
I hated thinking
that life wasn't for me…

45
00:02:47,126 --> 00:02:48,376
that I was destined to be

46
00:02:48,459 --> 00:02:53,709
just some average, boring, invisible girl
who had no friends.

47
00:02:53,793 --> 00:02:57,043
In Australia, we call that a Nigel,
but whatever.

48
00:02:57,126 --> 00:02:58,668
You guys know what I mean.

49
00:03:00,709 --> 00:03:02,459
I wanted to be something more.

50
00:03:04,251 --> 00:03:05,918
And that's when I decided…

51
00:03:08,168 --> 00:03:10,668
…that's it.
I'm gonna become popular.

52
00:03:11,459 --> 00:03:13,751
I know your favorite is
"I Want It That Way,"

53
00:03:13,834 --> 00:03:15,084
{\an8}but it's my favorite too.

54
00:03:15,584 --> 00:03:16,834
{\an8}Oh my God!

55
00:03:16,918 --> 00:03:21,251
{\an8}Okay, I Darrin Dance Groove'd my ass off
and became captain of the cheer squad.

56
00:03:21,334 --> 00:03:24,543
{\an8}I got so many new friends,
I didn't even know some of their names.

57
00:03:24,626 --> 00:03:27,418
{\an8}But like, of course,
I would always smile at them.

58
00:03:28,043 --> 00:03:32,168
And, oh my God, before I knew it,
I had the hottest boyfriend in school.

59
00:03:32,251 --> 00:03:36,543
Like he was so, so hot.
Just like, mega hot.

60
00:03:36,626 --> 00:03:39,793
{\an8}-

61
00:03:40,668 --> 00:03:42,376
{\an8}Steph! Seth is here!

62
00:03:42,459 --> 00:03:44,501
{\an8}Uh, yep, yep. Coming, coming.

63
00:03:45,209 --> 00:03:50,043
♪ Singing the song we wrote
About a girl you used to know ♪

64
00:03:52,543 --> 00:03:53,543
Mmm.

65
00:03:53,626 --> 00:03:56,334
Yeah, this… this
is really good, Mr. Conway.

66
00:03:56,876 --> 00:03:58,168
It's cereal, Seth.

67
00:03:58,251 --> 00:04:00,709
Stephie, let's move it!

68
00:04:00,793 --> 00:04:04,793
So, are you going to ask
my daughter to the prom or not?

69
00:04:05,668 --> 00:04:06,668
Me?

70
00:04:06,751 --> 00:04:09,459
What? No, I don't know
what you're talking about.

71
00:04:09,543 --> 00:04:13,251
You drive here every morning
just so Stephie can drive you to school.

72
00:04:13,334 --> 00:04:15,376
-You think I'm an idiot?
-No, sir.

73
00:04:15,876 --> 00:04:19,793
It's really hard to find the right time.
And what about Blaine?

74
00:04:19,876 --> 00:04:21,001
Hey!

75
00:04:21,084 --> 00:04:23,751
Oh my God, Seth, did you Fatone your hair?

76
00:04:23,834 --> 00:04:25,626
It looks so good!

77
00:04:25,709 --> 00:04:27,834
Dad, you didn't have to cook breakfast.

78
00:04:27,918 --> 00:04:29,168
You're about to graduate.

79
00:04:29,251 --> 00:04:31,834
We're not gonna have too many more
of these breakfast opportunities.

80
00:04:31,918 --> 00:04:34,168
-Yeah.
-Grateful to be included, sir.

81
00:04:34,251 --> 00:04:36,334
Um, can we actually rain check?

82
00:04:36,418 --> 00:04:39,334
I'm on a diet of only bananas
and ice cubes till prom.

83
00:04:39,418 --> 00:04:41,793
Oh! Speaking of…

84
00:04:43,626 --> 00:04:46,001
I've been, uh, waiting to give you this.

85
00:04:51,793 --> 00:04:54,751
"I know you'll look beautiful in this.
Love, Mum."

86
00:04:57,001 --> 00:04:58,418
Oh my God.

87
00:05:08,543 --> 00:05:09,834
It's gorgeous.

88
00:05:15,501 --> 00:05:17,418
You know, Dad, um,

89
00:05:17,501 --> 00:05:20,126
I saw at the mall
in that empty store next to Wet Seal

90
00:05:20,209 --> 00:05:23,501
that they were holding, like, groups
for widows and widowers.

91
00:05:23,584 --> 00:05:24,959
Looked pretty jumping.

92
00:05:25,043 --> 00:05:28,293
You're a catch, Mr. Conway.
A sad woman would totally go out with you.

93
00:05:28,918 --> 00:05:32,626
I'll tell you what, I'll ask somebody out
when you do, Seth.

94
00:05:32,709 --> 00:05:33,918
Yeah.

95
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:35,834
Did you hear
Tiffany went behind my back

96
00:05:35,918 --> 00:05:37,209
and got the Activities Committee

97
00:05:37,293 --> 00:05:40,918
to make the prom king and queen song
"Wherever You Will Go" by The Calling?

98
00:05:41,001 --> 00:05:44,876
Uh, no. You know, that piece of gossip
hasn't really trickled down to me yet.

99
00:05:44,959 --> 00:05:47,709
Well, when it gets to you,
believe it.

100
00:05:48,209 --> 00:05:49,751
She's doing it to mess with me.

101
00:05:49,834 --> 00:05:52,959
She knows I want a classic,
like "Power of Love."

102
00:05:53,043 --> 00:05:56,709
I'm not going to go to my prom,
get my crown, get glitter-rained on

103
00:05:56,793 --> 00:05:59,418
and then dance to
"Wherever You Will F-ing--"

104
00:06:00,376 --> 00:06:02,126
-Ooh! Ow!

105
00:06:03,501 --> 00:06:04,543
There she is,

106
00:06:05,418 --> 00:06:06,751
Deanna Russo,

107
00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:10,251
Harding High cheer captain
and prom queen '95.

108
00:06:10,334 --> 00:06:11,876
Bangin' bod.

109
00:06:11,959 --> 00:06:15,084
She's boy-band rich and lives
in the most beautiful house in Maryland

110
00:06:15,168 --> 00:06:17,376
with her… Three, two, one…

111
00:06:19,168 --> 00:06:20,793
…perfect husband,

112
00:06:20,876 --> 00:06:24,584
Harding High quarterback
with a famously girthy dong.

113
00:06:24,668 --> 00:06:25,626
So I've heard.

114
00:06:26,918 --> 00:06:28,834
They're just like me and Blaine.

115
00:06:29,501 --> 00:06:32,751
I want it so bad
I can practically taste them frenching.

116
00:06:33,709 --> 00:06:35,043
It's my dream life.

117
00:06:35,543 --> 00:06:37,959
And it all starts with prom queen.

118
00:06:38,668 --> 00:06:41,543
Well, I think you're better
than just another Deanna Russo.

119
00:06:42,168 --> 00:06:43,293
Oh my God, Seth…

120
00:06:44,001 --> 00:06:47,209
Oh my God.
Your forehead's bleeding.

121
00:06:48,209 --> 00:06:49,043
Oh.

122
00:06:54,959 --> 00:06:55,834
Sure you're okay?

123
00:06:55,918 --> 00:06:57,043
Oh, yeah, I'm good.

124
00:06:58,459 --> 00:07:00,584
Hey, so you know
prom is coming up,

125
00:07:00,668 --> 00:07:03,168
and I really wanted to ask you something.

126
00:07:03,251 --> 00:07:04,751
I know it's a long shot, but--

127
00:07:04,834 --> 00:07:08,126
Seth, you don't even have
to finish the question.

128
00:07:08,209 --> 00:07:11,793
-The answer's yes.
-Wait, really? What about Blaine?

129
00:07:11,876 --> 00:07:15,501
Ah, he'll understand. It wouldn't feel
right to spend prom without you.

130
00:07:16,084 --> 00:07:16,959
Seth,

131
00:07:17,834 --> 00:07:21,626
I would love for you to come
to my after-prom party.

132
00:07:22,834 --> 00:07:25,459
Oh, wow. Yeah, cool.

133
00:07:25,543 --> 00:07:28,293
-Thanks, Steph.
-Oh my God. Duh, no prob.

134
00:07:28,376 --> 00:07:30,376
Oh, also, there's gonna be a VIP room,

135
00:07:30,459 --> 00:07:32,959
and you're totally gonna be on the list.
I mean it.

136
00:07:33,043 --> 00:07:33,876
Fun.

137
00:07:33,959 --> 00:07:37,668
Okay, um, I'm gonna let you out here
because I got to make my entrance.

138
00:07:37,751 --> 00:07:40,709
Oh, also, I need that sock back.
It's Blaine's.

139
00:07:41,334 --> 00:07:42,918
We use it for handies.

140
00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:50,168
Oh, okay, yeah. That's… that's gross.

141
00:07:53,334 --> 00:07:54,584
-Bye!
-Bye!

142
00:07:54,668 --> 00:07:57,459
♪ I know where I belong ♪

143
00:07:57,543 --> 00:07:59,626
♪ And nothing's gonna happen ♪

144
00:07:59,709 --> 00:08:01,459
♪ Yeah ♪

145
00:08:03,459 --> 00:08:07,168
♪ 'Cause she's so high ♪

146
00:08:07,251 --> 00:08:09,209
♪ High above me ♪

147
00:08:09,293 --> 00:08:11,459
♪ She's so lovely ♪

148
00:08:11,543 --> 00:08:15,001
♪ She's so high ♪

149
00:08:15,084 --> 00:08:17,168
♪ Like Cleopatra ♪

150
00:08:17,251 --> 00:08:20,501
♪ Joan of Arc or Aphrodi-- ♪

151
00:08:20,584 --> 00:08:22,293
-Oh my God!

152
00:08:22,376 --> 00:08:24,543
I was wondering
where the future prom queen was.

153
00:08:24,626 --> 00:08:27,168
Just thinking about my life
with the future prom king.

154
00:08:28,209 --> 00:08:30,501
I'm gonna miss you so much
these next two periods.

155
00:08:30,584 --> 00:08:31,418
Yeah?

156
00:08:31,918 --> 00:08:35,043
Let me give you a little something
to remember me by. Boop, boop!

157
00:08:35,126 --> 00:08:37,959
Oh my God, Blaine, stop.
That's so embarrassing.

158
00:08:38,043 --> 00:08:40,709
Oh my God, he's so into me. What?

159
00:08:40,793 --> 00:08:43,709
Oh my God. Did anyone see that? Bye.

160
00:08:43,793 --> 00:08:45,709
Ew. He shouldn't do that to you.

161
00:08:45,793 --> 00:08:48,918
It's called love, Marth.
That's what couples do.

162
00:08:49,001 --> 00:08:51,334
When you get a boyfriend,
you'll understand.

163
00:08:51,418 --> 00:08:52,751
Yeah, I'll pass.

164
00:08:53,543 --> 00:08:55,168
-Here.

165
00:08:55,251 --> 00:08:56,793
Don't lose these. I'm serious.

166
00:08:56,876 --> 00:08:59,709
If my parents find out I gave you
the keys to our lake house for a party,

167
00:08:59,793 --> 00:09:02,418
they'll ship me off to a convent
before I even make it to Wesleyan.

168
00:09:02,501 --> 00:09:05,126
-My grandfather built that with his hands.

169
00:09:05,209 --> 00:09:06,043
If anything happens--

170
00:09:06,126 --> 00:09:09,501
Oh my God, I promise you have nothing
to worry about. You're the best.

171
00:09:09,584 --> 00:09:12,501
Thank you so much, Marth.
You know you're invited, right?

172
00:09:13,001 --> 00:09:15,834
Did you just invite me
to a party that's at my own house?

173
00:09:15,918 --> 00:09:18,501
Of course not.
I'm inviting you to the VIP section.

174
00:09:18,584 --> 00:09:20,959
Seth will be there too.
So you'll have someone to talk to.

175
00:09:21,043 --> 00:09:23,543
Right. I could also talk to you.

176
00:09:24,168 --> 00:09:26,751
Right, yeah, duh.

177
00:09:26,834 --> 00:09:30,459
Um, except I'm probably gonna be losing
my bottom half virginity to Blaine.

178
00:09:30,543 --> 00:09:31,918
So I'll be, like, in and out.

179
00:09:32,876 --> 00:09:35,584
So will Blaine, literally.
You know what I mean?

180
00:09:35,668 --> 00:09:38,709
Also, Martha, it's pep rally day.
Why aren't you in your cheer uniform?

181
00:09:40,418 --> 00:09:42,251
Oh my God.

182
00:09:42,334 --> 00:09:44,876
You look so hot right now.

183
00:09:44,959 --> 00:09:47,001
-You look so great.
-Okay. Yeah.

184
00:09:47,084 --> 00:09:49,209
-Okay. I'll see you later. Bye!
-Bye.

185
00:09:53,209 --> 00:09:57,209
So, I've been telling everyone
about the VIP section at our party,

186
00:09:57,293 --> 00:09:59,334
but here's a little secret.

187
00:09:59,834 --> 00:10:04,251
There's gonna be
a VIP VIP section just for us.

188
00:10:05,626 --> 00:10:07,168
For boning.

189
00:10:09,293 --> 00:10:11,459
Mmm, so, uh, about that,

190
00:10:11,543 --> 00:10:15,626
um, most of the football team's already
said yes to going to a different party.

191
00:10:15,709 --> 00:10:17,834
But this one has
a heated pool and a live band.

192
00:10:17,918 --> 00:10:20,001
What? Whose party?

193
00:10:20,584 --> 00:10:22,876
Tiff's. But we could bone there,
if you want.

194
00:10:24,834 --> 00:10:27,876
What the slut?

195
00:10:27,959 --> 00:10:30,043
Get back to your seat, Miss Conway.

196
00:10:30,126 --> 00:10:34,626
I would like to start my class
before the next millennium hits.

197
00:10:36,001 --> 00:10:38,418
-Can I go to the bathroom?
-Fine.

198
00:10:38,501 --> 00:10:39,834
Dex, wait.

199
00:10:45,376 --> 00:10:47,501
Get this to Tiffany,

200
00:10:48,751 --> 00:10:49,584
now.

201
00:10:50,709 --> 00:10:52,709
Would you turn your books to the…

202
00:11:01,668 --> 00:11:03,126
Got your note.

203
00:11:05,501 --> 00:11:10,001
For the last time, Tiffany,
I won cheer captain fair and square,

204
00:11:10,084 --> 00:11:13,918
and you and Blaine were broken up
when we got together. I don't cheat.

205
00:11:14,001 --> 00:11:19,126
So why do you continue
to be the butt-roids on my… butt?

206
00:11:19,209 --> 00:11:21,084
I don't know what you're talking about.

207
00:11:21,168 --> 00:11:23,668
First, you changed
the prom king and queen song.

208
00:11:23,751 --> 00:11:25,334
Now you're throwing an after-prom party

209
00:11:25,418 --> 00:11:27,709
when you know
I've been planning mine for months.

210
00:11:27,793 --> 00:11:30,209
You mean the one you have to throw
at Barfa's family lake house

211
00:11:30,293 --> 00:11:31,459
'cause you live in a shanty.

212
00:11:32,918 --> 00:11:34,126
Her name is Martha,

213
00:11:34,209 --> 00:11:37,418
and she hasn't thrown up on herself
since the eighth grade, so…

214
00:11:38,668 --> 00:11:40,334
-Cancel your party!
-Sorry.

215
00:11:40,418 --> 00:11:43,043
My daddy has already paid
for the caterers.

216
00:11:43,126 --> 00:11:47,834
Open bar, Jäger,
Mike's Hard Lemonade, Smirnoff Ice.

217
00:11:48,459 --> 00:11:50,251
All the good shit.

218
00:11:50,918 --> 00:11:53,876
So, you cancel yours.

219
00:11:53,959 --> 00:11:56,584
You won't wanna throw a party
after I beat you for prom queen.

220
00:11:58,001 --> 00:11:59,959
What makes you think
you're gonna win?

221
00:12:00,043 --> 00:12:02,418
'Cause I'm MTV, and you're VH1.

222
00:12:02,501 --> 00:12:04,834
I'm the real deal, and you're a poser.

223
00:12:04,918 --> 00:12:08,668
You think you can shimmy your koala ass
to the top of the food chain I created

224
00:12:08,751 --> 00:12:10,543
and screw up my senior year?

225
00:12:10,626 --> 00:12:13,168
You're just a poor spaz playing dress up.

226
00:12:15,084 --> 00:12:16,793
Don't go chasing waterfalls.

227
00:12:19,543 --> 00:12:22,084
Take that back.

228
00:12:28,376 --> 00:12:31,376
-Freshmen suck!

229
00:12:31,459 --> 00:12:33,918
-Freshmen suck!
-Freshmen suck!

230
00:12:34,001 --> 00:12:35,709
-Freshman suck!
-Settle down.

231
00:12:36,501 --> 00:12:38,793
Blaine, settle down. Settle down.

232
00:12:39,334 --> 00:12:40,168
Listen.

233
00:12:40,709 --> 00:12:44,918
We have less than a month of school left.
Let's all just get through it.

234
00:12:45,501 --> 00:12:47,376
-Now I know you all…
-All right, sluts.

235
00:12:47,459 --> 00:12:49,334
Everybody, listen up.

236
00:12:49,418 --> 00:12:51,209
Listen to Martha.

237
00:12:51,293 --> 00:12:53,543
Just a couple notes
before we get out there.

238
00:12:53,626 --> 00:12:55,001
We replaced the spotlight operators

239
00:12:55,084 --> 00:12:56,876
with kids tall enough
to see what's going on.

240
00:12:56,959 --> 00:12:59,834
Try not to hit the ground too hard
so our CD doesn't skip.

241
00:12:59,918 --> 00:13:00,876
"Our CD"?

242
00:13:00,959 --> 00:13:05,959
I'm sorry, since when does a clipboard
and a windbreaker make you a Bulldogette?

243
00:13:06,043 --> 00:13:09,126
Since I appointed her
equipment manager, Tiffany.

244
00:13:09,209 --> 00:13:11,334
Do you have any idea
how much she does for us?

245
00:13:11,418 --> 00:13:14,043
Without her, we'd fall apart.
Whereas without you, Tiff,

246
00:13:14,126 --> 00:13:17,001
we'd, I don't know,
have less stains on our uniform

247
00:13:17,084 --> 00:13:20,084
-from catching your spray-tanned ass.

248
00:13:20,168 --> 00:13:21,168
Continue, Marth.

249
00:13:21,251 --> 00:13:22,751
Oh, I was done.

250
00:13:23,334 --> 00:13:24,251
Oh.

251
00:13:24,334 --> 00:13:27,668
All right, biatches. When I started
choreographing this routine,

252
00:13:27,751 --> 00:13:30,918
I knew it had to be more
than just a regular cheer,

253
00:13:31,001 --> 00:13:34,501
which is why I made this,

254
00:13:34,584 --> 00:13:36,793
a step-by-step guide to our routine

255
00:13:36,876 --> 00:13:41,584
so that future squads will be able
to replicate our VMA-level performance.

256
00:13:42,584 --> 00:13:46,084
Martha, please see
that this gets into the school archives

257
00:13:46,168 --> 00:13:48,126
so that our legends will live on.

258
00:13:49,126 --> 00:13:51,501
-Do we have a school archive?
-We do now.

259
00:13:52,043 --> 00:13:53,709
All right, places, skanks!

260
00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:56,209
Twins?

261
00:13:57,001 --> 00:13:57,918
Can we talk?

262
00:13:58,001 --> 00:14:00,293
And speaking of "not school appropriate,"

263
00:14:00,376 --> 00:14:04,876
please welcome
our award-winning Harding Bulldogettes.

264
00:14:08,084 --> 00:14:09,043
♪ Are you ready ♪

265
00:14:09,876 --> 00:14:11,334
♪ For the Harding ♪

266
00:14:12,959 --> 00:14:15,584
-♪ Bulldogettes? ♪
-That's my girl!

267
00:14:17,876 --> 00:14:19,626
♪ Good gracious, ass is bodacious ♪

268
00:14:19,709 --> 00:14:21,293
♪ Flirtatious, trying to show patience ♪

269
00:14:21,376 --> 00:14:23,168
♪ And can't nobody stop the juice ♪

270
00:14:23,251 --> 00:14:25,251
♪ So, baby, tell me what's the use
I said ♪

271
00:14:25,334 --> 00:14:27,668
-♪ It's gettin' hot in here ♪
-♪ So hot ♪

272
00:14:27,751 --> 00:14:29,376
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪

273
00:14:29,459 --> 00:14:33,293
♪ I am gettin' so hot
I wanna take my clothes off ♪

274
00:14:33,376 --> 00:14:35,334
-♪ It's gettin' hot in here ♪
-♪ So hot ♪

275
00:14:35,418 --> 00:14:36,959
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪

276
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:40,584
♪ I am gettin' so hot
I wanna take my clothes off ♪

277
00:14:44,959 --> 00:14:48,168
♪ Come on over, come on over, baby ♪

278
00:14:48,251 --> 00:14:50,084
-Yeah!
-♪ Come on over ♪

279
00:14:50,168 --> 00:14:51,793
♪ Come on over, over, over ♪

280
00:14:51,876 --> 00:14:54,084
♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪

281
00:14:55,751 --> 00:14:57,084
-Ready?
-Okay!

282
00:14:57,168 --> 00:15:00,793
♪ We are the Bulldogs
We like it rough, rough, rough ♪

283
00:15:00,876 --> 00:15:03,959
♪ No one can beat us
No, we're too tough ♪

284
00:15:04,626 --> 00:15:09,334
♪ Yeah, yeah, we fight to the finish
We're in it to win it ♪

285
00:15:09,418 --> 00:15:12,418
♪ Oh, yeah ♪

286
00:15:13,001 --> 00:15:14,501
♪ Like this ♪

287
00:15:14,584 --> 00:15:18,209
♪ Some people search forever ♪

288
00:15:18,293 --> 00:15:21,418
♪ For that one special kiss ♪

289
00:15:21,501 --> 00:15:27,418
♪ Oh, I can't believe
It's happening to me ♪

290
00:15:27,501 --> 00:15:31,334
♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪

291
00:15:31,418 --> 00:15:33,126
♪ For a moment ♪

292
00:15:33,209 --> 00:15:36,334
♪ Moment, moment, moment ♪

293
00:15:36,418 --> 00:15:39,834
-♪ Moment, moment, moment… ♪

294
00:15:50,001 --> 00:15:51,834
Who wants to forget
the good old days?

295
00:15:51,918 --> 00:15:53,209
{\an8}No one.

296
00:15:53,293 --> 00:15:54,626
{\an8}That's why, at Balbo Hummers,

297
00:15:54,709 --> 00:15:57,709
{\an8}we've got the sweetest rides
for the sweetest prices.

298
00:15:57,793 --> 00:16:00,501
Oh! And hey,
all you high school seniors out there,

299
00:16:00,584 --> 00:16:03,168
who doesn't want a Hummer
on their big night. Am I right?

300
00:16:03,251 --> 00:16:08,334
That's right. Balbo Hummers is renting out
stretch limos for all of your prom needs.

301
00:16:08,418 --> 00:16:10,501
♪ Come get a Hummer from Balbo ♪

302
00:16:10,584 --> 00:16:14,376
{\an8}Balbo Hummers.
We're ready for prom. Are you?

303
00:16:15,918 --> 00:16:17,293
I'm ready for prom.

304
00:16:29,418 --> 00:16:30,501
What the slut?

305
00:16:38,251 --> 00:16:40,001
Oh, hi.

306
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:42,418
Hi. Hello. Hi.

307
00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:44,709
Excuse me. Um, I'm not sure what happened,

308
00:16:44,793 --> 00:16:48,209
but I think there's been a mistake,
and I've been put in the wrong room

309
00:16:48,293 --> 00:16:52,209
'cause there's a bunch of birthday cards
for, like, a really old person.

310
00:16:52,293 --> 00:16:54,751
And the TV's flat,
like the back of it is missing,

311
00:16:54,834 --> 00:16:57,209
and I really need to see
who's number one on TRL.

312
00:16:57,293 --> 00:17:00,293
Dr. Johnson to the third floor.
The cheerleader just woke up.

313
00:17:00,376 --> 00:17:03,626
Oh, I don't mean to be a bitch,
but "cheer captain."

314
00:17:04,126 --> 00:17:05,209
Cheer captain.

315
00:17:05,293 --> 00:17:09,376
And do you have any Von Dutch jeans?
'Cause this is, like, really unflattering.

316
00:17:09,459 --> 00:17:10,459
Oh crap.

317
00:17:12,043 --> 00:17:13,168
What are you staring at?

318
00:17:13,834 --> 00:17:17,001
Hello? It's very rude to be a stare bear.

319
00:17:18,334 --> 00:17:21,376
Hello? Are you-- Stop… stop doing that!

320
00:17:21,459 --> 00:17:23,293
Why are you doing that, you freaky old--

321
00:17:33,834 --> 00:17:35,459
And the cheerleader's back down.

322
00:17:35,959 --> 00:17:38,168
Oh, cheer captain. Are you okay?

323
00:17:39,709 --> 00:17:41,793
This defies scientific explanation.

324
00:17:41,876 --> 00:17:42,959
Being this hot?

325
00:17:43,876 --> 00:17:44,709
No.

326
00:17:44,793 --> 00:17:46,959
Stephanie, it's 2022.

327
00:17:49,293 --> 00:17:50,418
No way.

328
00:17:50,501 --> 00:17:51,543
Mm-hmm.

329
00:17:51,626 --> 00:17:54,793
Are you sure I haven't been
Freaky Friday'd into some old lady's body?

330
00:17:54,876 --> 00:17:57,584
You've been in a coma
for almost two decades.

331
00:17:58,959 --> 00:18:00,626
That doesn't sound right.

332
00:18:00,709 --> 00:18:03,959
I know this is a lot to process,
but we'll just take this nice and slow.

333
00:18:04,043 --> 00:18:05,168
-Stephie?
-Stephanie!

334
00:18:05,251 --> 00:18:06,334
-Oh my God.
-Stephanie!

335
00:18:06,418 --> 00:18:09,918
Stephie, I can't believe this!
It's me. It's Dad!

336
00:18:10,959 --> 00:18:14,251
Oh my God!

337
00:18:14,334 --> 00:18:15,709
-Dad?
-Yeah!

338
00:18:15,793 --> 00:18:19,376
How about me? Do you remember?
It's Martha, Martha Riser.

339
00:18:19,459 --> 00:18:21,209
I never thought
I'd have this moment again.

340
00:18:21,293 --> 00:18:23,293
I was this close to freezing you.

341
00:18:23,376 --> 00:18:24,251
What do you mean, Dad?

342
00:18:24,334 --> 00:18:27,376
Don't worry. I couldn't afford it.
I was only gonna freeze your head.

343
00:18:27,459 --> 00:18:29,584
-No!
-We'll have to be gentle.

344
00:18:29,668 --> 00:18:32,043
Physically she's aged,
but mentally she's still 17.

345
00:18:32,126 --> 00:18:34,668
Of course. Yes, I see
how we came in a little hot.

346
00:18:34,751 --> 00:18:35,584
Yeah.

347
00:18:35,668 --> 00:18:38,543
Martha, you look like
an Ally McBeal character.

348
00:18:38,626 --> 00:18:40,293
Oh my God. Thank you.

349
00:18:40,793 --> 00:18:44,043
Well, the good news is
nothing abnormal came up in her tests.

350
00:18:44,126 --> 00:18:47,751
Stephanie, your physical
and mental resilience are remarkable.

351
00:18:47,834 --> 00:18:49,001
Uh, let… let's go home.

352
00:18:56,209 --> 00:18:59,209
Marth, oh my God, what is that, a tiny TV?

353
00:18:59,293 --> 00:19:02,293
No. No, Steph,
this is my cell phone.

354
00:19:02,376 --> 00:19:04,918
Oh my God. Whoa! Really?

355
00:19:05,001 --> 00:19:07,168
-That is very cool.

356
00:19:07,251 --> 00:19:10,668
I always knew you'd be some high-powered,
Sex and the City businesswoman.

357
00:19:10,751 --> 00:19:12,668
-Total Miranda, right, Dad?
-Oh…

358
00:19:13,668 --> 00:19:17,293
I'm actually
a high school principal at Harding.

359
00:19:17,376 --> 00:19:21,459
Oh my God, you still got
a good sense of humor.

360
00:19:26,501 --> 00:19:32,334
That's… I mean, that's actually
a very cool and important job.

361
00:19:32,418 --> 00:19:35,043
-So, whoo!

362
00:19:35,918 --> 00:19:38,084
Um, and they give you
a fancy cell phone for that?

363
00:19:38,168 --> 00:19:40,043
Oh, they're common now. Even I have one.

364
00:19:40,126 --> 00:19:40,959
Oh. Okay.

365
00:19:41,043 --> 00:19:44,251
They do much more than just call people.
You could also watch the news.

366
00:19:44,334 --> 00:19:46,918
Look, here's a news story
about you right now.

367
00:19:47,001 --> 00:19:50,834
-What? No. Oh, about me? No, oh my God.
-Yeah, it's you!

368
00:19:50,918 --> 00:19:52,043
Okay, wait, show me.

369
00:19:52,126 --> 00:19:56,459
Video edits of her infamous accident
went immediately viral on Instagram…

370
00:19:56,543 --> 00:20:00,084
Oh my God.
I went down like a bag of dicks.

371
00:20:00,834 --> 00:20:01,918
Oh.

372
00:20:02,001 --> 00:20:03,501
-Stephie!
-Wait. What does "viral" mean?

373
00:20:03,584 --> 00:20:06,918
Well, "viral" just means everybody saw it.

374
00:20:07,001 --> 00:20:09,626
Everybody's seen that?
I look retarded in those videos.

375
00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:12,709
Now, Steph,
you… you cannot say the R-word anymore.

376
00:20:12,793 --> 00:20:14,418
-What? Really? Why?
-Mm-mm.

377
00:20:14,501 --> 00:20:17,334
Because it's offensive
to people with intellectual disabilities.

378
00:20:17,418 --> 00:20:21,001
But what if something
really is, like, "R-word,"

379
00:20:21,793 --> 00:20:24,709
um, what do you call it?
Like, "super gay"?

380
00:20:24,793 --> 00:20:28,501
No, no. You can't call things "gay"
anymore, either,

381
00:20:28,584 --> 00:20:32,001
unless you use it
as a neutral-positive term

382
00:20:32,084 --> 00:20:34,668
to refer to somebody
who identifies as homosexual.

383
00:20:34,751 --> 00:20:37,543
-So you cannot say the "R-word."
-Right.

384
00:20:37,626 --> 00:20:38,584
And, um…

385
00:20:38,668 --> 00:20:40,001
Sorry. Coma brain.

386
00:20:40,084 --> 00:20:42,126
-What was the other word you can't say?
-"Gay."

387
00:20:42,209 --> 00:20:43,334
Ha! Made you say it.

388
00:20:45,668 --> 00:20:47,084
-Stephie.
-I-- That's…

389
00:20:47,168 --> 00:20:48,834
-Still got it, Dad.
-You do.

390
00:20:48,918 --> 00:20:51,459
Dad, um, can you take a left up here?

391
00:20:51,543 --> 00:20:52,668
-Oh.
-To see--

392
00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:56,334
No, no, no. No, um,
actually, you should get home and rest.

393
00:20:56,418 --> 00:20:58,876
Rest? I've been asleep for 20 years.

394
00:20:58,959 --> 00:21:01,501
-Dad, just take this left here.
-Jim, don't take the left.

395
00:21:01,584 --> 00:21:03,126
Is there-- I don't understand…

396
00:21:03,209 --> 00:21:05,334
-Indicator. Indicate left.
-Do not. Do not.

397
00:21:06,334 --> 00:21:09,793
-Thank God, it's still the same.
-Yep. There it is. Let's keep going.

398
00:21:10,334 --> 00:21:11,959
That's not Deanna Russo's husband.

399
00:21:12,043 --> 00:21:13,418
-Who is that?
-Um…

400
00:21:13,501 --> 00:21:16,584
Oh my God.
I know that ass anywhere. That's Blaine.

401
00:21:16,668 --> 00:21:20,959
Wait. Did he get me my dream house?
Stop the car! Why didn't you say anything?

402
00:21:21,043 --> 00:21:23,959
-Don't stop the car.
-What are you talking about? Stop the car!

403
00:21:24,043 --> 00:21:25,959
Don't stop the car.
No. He's probably sleeping.

404
00:21:26,043 --> 00:21:28,168
-He walked into the house.
-You don't wanna wake him.

405
00:21:28,251 --> 00:21:29,334
He looked tired!

406
00:21:29,418 --> 00:21:32,084
-I don't know what to do. Ah!
-Just stop the car!

407
00:21:32,168 --> 00:21:33,376
-No!

408
00:21:51,793 --> 00:21:53,126
Oh. You know what?

409
00:21:53,209 --> 00:21:55,709
Someone from the shelter
already came by yesterday

410
00:21:55,793 --> 00:21:59,251
to pick up our donations, so…
Thank you though.

411
00:21:59,334 --> 00:22:00,334
Tiffany?

412
00:22:01,501 --> 00:22:04,084
Shut up!

413
00:22:04,751 --> 00:22:06,126
Stephanie?

414
00:22:06,209 --> 00:22:09,959
-Oh my God, look at you!

415
00:22:10,043 --> 00:22:12,709
-I can't believe this.
-What is happening?

416
00:22:12,793 --> 00:22:15,251
I have so many things I… I want to say.

417
00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:17,959
I've always felt terrible
about what happened.

418
00:22:18,043 --> 00:22:20,543
I can't believe
you didn't land that stunt.

419
00:22:20,626 --> 00:22:24,376
Wait, why are you living here with Blaine?
I don't get it.

420
00:22:24,459 --> 00:22:26,418
This is mine and Blaine's dream house, so…

421
00:22:26,501 --> 00:22:29,084
-Well, actually--
-Why are you here?

422
00:22:29,168 --> 00:22:30,668
It's a long story.

423
00:22:30,751 --> 00:22:33,668
Our parents got it for us
as a wedding gift and…

424
00:22:33,751 --> 00:22:36,293
Well, that's it. The end.

425
00:22:36,376 --> 00:22:37,834
No, you shut your face.

426
00:22:37,918 --> 00:22:41,043
Um, where's Blaine?
Just get me Blaine, and, um--

427
00:22:41,126 --> 00:22:44,084
I'm so sorry.
He is just so swamped right now with work.

428
00:22:44,168 --> 00:22:45,043
Oh.

429
00:22:45,543 --> 00:22:46,959
I see what you did here.

430
00:22:47,668 --> 00:22:50,084
Get rid of me
so you can steal my dream life.

431
00:22:50,168 --> 00:22:52,043
Oh…

432
00:22:52,751 --> 00:22:53,834
Steph.

433
00:22:53,918 --> 00:22:55,376
-No, no.

434
00:22:55,459 --> 00:22:58,084
Look, I know
we never saw eye-to-eye back then,

435
00:22:58,168 --> 00:23:01,126
but you know, the beautiful thing
about time is you move on.

436
00:23:02,209 --> 00:23:07,334
Okay, you know what? I need to go
because I am brining zucchini ribbons,

437
00:23:07,418 --> 00:23:10,084
but I never let a guest leave
without a gift.

438
00:23:10,168 --> 00:23:13,084
Um, so I'm just gonna give you…

439
00:23:13,168 --> 00:23:14,293
-What?
-Here.

440
00:23:14,376 --> 00:23:17,251
Homemade from my own starter.
A peace offering.

441
00:23:17,334 --> 00:23:21,209
I really look forward
to putting the past behind us.

442
00:23:21,793 --> 00:23:25,251
You know, move past the past.

443
00:23:26,084 --> 00:23:29,668
So, maybe when you're feeling better
and a little bit more stable,

444
00:23:29,751 --> 00:23:31,168
we could do brunch sometime.

445
00:23:31,251 --> 00:23:33,084
-Blaine!
-It's great to see you!

446
00:23:33,168 --> 00:23:34,168
Blaine!

447
00:23:36,251 --> 00:23:39,418
-Come on, come on, come on, come on.

448
00:23:41,501 --> 00:23:42,876
Who's that at the door?

449
00:23:42,959 --> 00:23:46,376
It was… Stephanie Conway.

450
00:23:50,043 --> 00:23:51,084
She's awake?

451
00:23:57,126 --> 00:23:58,168
Ah, yes.

452
00:24:00,876 --> 00:24:02,584
Perfectly preserved.

453
00:24:04,501 --> 00:24:06,959
-And here we are.

454
00:24:07,043 --> 00:24:09,501
Oh!
Did she not wear her seat belt?

455
00:24:09,584 --> 00:24:10,834
I don't think she did.

456
00:24:10,918 --> 00:24:12,418
-Oh God.

457
00:24:12,501 --> 00:24:14,834
-It's locked, hon.
-Dad!

458
00:24:14,918 --> 00:24:16,584
Here we are. Yeah.

459
00:24:16,668 --> 00:24:17,501
Hey, S…

460
00:24:19,834 --> 00:24:20,668
She's…

461
00:24:28,501 --> 00:24:30,209
Oh my God.

462
00:24:31,084 --> 00:24:33,043
Didn't have the heart to change it.

463
00:24:33,126 --> 00:24:37,501
Kept your Cabriolet too. You know me,
never very good at letting things go.

464
00:24:45,501 --> 00:24:49,001
I… I also never, uh, canceled
any of your magazine subscriptions.

465
00:24:49,084 --> 00:24:52,126
Wait, Madonna's now called Lady Gaga?

466
00:24:54,043 --> 00:24:54,876
-No.
-No.

467
00:24:54,959 --> 00:24:58,251
-But she looks exactly like Madonna.
-You've had a lot to digest today.

468
00:24:58,334 --> 00:24:59,876
We'll get you caught up this weekend.

469
00:25:01,793 --> 00:25:02,876
Dad!

470
00:25:06,501 --> 00:25:08,918
Dad. What the F?

471
00:25:09,501 --> 00:25:12,751
Who was in charge of my feeding tube?
My boobs are huge.

472
00:25:13,584 --> 00:25:16,043
Well, you… you're just getting older.

473
00:25:16,126 --> 00:25:17,959
You know, bodies change,

474
00:25:18,043 --> 00:25:21,209
and pretty soon,
you'll go through menopause.

475
00:25:21,293 --> 00:25:22,918
Oh my God. Don't.

476
00:25:24,418 --> 00:25:25,793
I can't do this.

477
00:25:27,793 --> 00:25:30,293
I was so close to having my dream life.

478
00:25:30,376 --> 00:25:32,168
You still can, sweetie.

479
00:25:32,251 --> 00:25:34,334
I can't. Look at this.

480
00:25:34,418 --> 00:25:36,209
-Well--

481
00:25:36,293 --> 00:25:39,126
-If anyone can do it, it's you.

482
00:25:39,209 --> 00:25:41,834
Oh, Dad, shut up. I'll get it.

483
00:25:41,918 --> 00:25:43,001
Dad…

484
00:25:43,084 --> 00:25:44,918
Oh God. Okay.

485
00:26:05,626 --> 00:26:08,709
♪ I built a place for you to land ♪

486
00:26:10,501 --> 00:26:12,168
♪ Can you see it now ♪

487
00:26:14,251 --> 00:26:16,251
♪ From where you stand? ♪

488
00:26:16,959 --> 00:26:21,001
♪ You may think the fall is just too far ♪

489
00:26:22,084 --> 00:26:23,668
♪ When you leap ♪

490
00:26:24,501 --> 00:26:27,668
♪ You see who you really are ♪

491
00:26:29,459 --> 00:26:33,376
♪ And if you jump now
I know you'll survive ♪

492
00:26:34,793 --> 00:26:38,293
♪ You see it's a beautiful ride ♪

493
00:26:39,459 --> 00:26:44,126
♪ When you're high ♪

494
00:26:44,209 --> 00:26:47,334
♪ Flying through the sky ♪

495
00:26:50,543 --> 00:26:52,543
♪ And on your way down ♪

496
00:26:52,626 --> 00:26:55,876
♪ The sound of a new day ♪

497
00:26:56,459 --> 00:26:58,251
♪ Calls you from the ground ♪

498
00:26:58,334 --> 00:27:00,459
Steph, babe, what are you doing?

499
00:27:00,543 --> 00:27:02,959
I'm trying to not be ugly.

500
00:27:04,709 --> 00:27:07,001
I'm just tired of being made fun of.

501
00:27:11,209 --> 00:27:13,418
You are not ugly.

502
00:27:14,834 --> 00:27:16,209
Yes, I am.

503
00:27:17,251 --> 00:27:19,751
I just want to be like the populars.

504
00:27:19,834 --> 00:27:22,668
Oh. What do they have that you don't?

505
00:27:22,751 --> 00:27:26,126
Cool hair. Hot clothes.
Even hotter boyfriends.

506
00:27:28,751 --> 00:27:30,584
They pronounce
their… …R's.

507
00:27:30,668 --> 00:27:32,168
Mmm.

508
00:27:32,251 --> 00:27:33,376
Well…

509
00:27:34,334 --> 00:27:40,793
I think that you are beautiful
and smart and funny…

510
00:27:42,668 --> 00:27:44,834
…and I think the accent makes you unique.

511
00:27:47,001 --> 00:27:49,459
Well, it doesn't really count
if you say it, Mum.

512
00:27:49,543 --> 00:27:51,584
Oh. It doesn't, does it?

513
00:27:51,668 --> 00:27:54,959
Well, uh, too bad 'cause it's a fact.

514
00:27:56,251 --> 00:27:58,668
Mums have senses about things like this.

515
00:27:59,918 --> 00:28:02,668
-And I know that you…
-Uh, Mum.

516
00:28:02,751 --> 00:28:06,459
…are gonna graduate and grow up

517
00:28:07,418 --> 00:28:09,418
and have the most perfect life.

518
00:28:10,293 --> 00:28:11,334
I just know it.

519
00:28:13,376 --> 00:28:14,334
You mean it?

520
00:28:16,418 --> 00:28:18,751
Do you think I could even be prom queen?

521
00:28:20,168 --> 00:28:22,543
-You sure that's what you want?
-Duh.

522
00:28:24,793 --> 00:28:28,834
Well, if anyone can make it happen,
it's you.

523
00:28:56,543 --> 00:28:57,376
♪ Let's go ♪

524
00:28:57,459 --> 00:28:59,709
♪ Ten percent luck
Twenty percent skill ♪

525
00:28:59,793 --> 00:29:02,918
♪ Fifteen percent concentrated
Power of will ♪

526
00:29:03,001 --> 00:29:05,626
♪ Five percent pleasure
Fifty percent pain ♪

527
00:29:05,709 --> 00:29:08,001
♪ And a hundred percent reason
To remember the name ♪

528
00:29:08,084 --> 00:29:10,876
♪ This is ten percent luck
Twenty percent skill ♪

529
00:29:10,959 --> 00:29:13,793
♪ Fifteen percent concentrated
Power of will ♪

530
00:29:13,876 --> 00:29:16,626
♪ Five percent pleasure
Fifty percent pain ♪

531
00:29:16,709 --> 00:29:19,334
♪ And a hundred percent reason
To remember the name ♪

532
00:29:19,418 --> 00:29:20,584
♪ Yeah ♪

533
00:29:21,168 --> 00:29:23,251
♪ Fort Minor, M-Shinoda ♪

534
00:29:23,334 --> 00:29:25,084
♪ Styles of Beyond ♪

535
00:29:43,959 --> 00:29:45,543
-Martha!
-Oh my God.

536
00:29:45,626 --> 00:29:47,584
-There you are!
-Steph! Wha…

537
00:29:48,168 --> 00:29:49,918
-Yeah.
-What are you doing here?

538
00:29:50,001 --> 00:29:53,126
This is exactly the type of car
a principal would drive.

539
00:29:53,209 --> 00:29:55,584
It's like… like you nailed it.

540
00:29:55,668 --> 00:29:58,668
-Um, I just need your help with something.
-Uh…

541
00:29:59,668 --> 00:30:00,959
I want to go back to school.

542
00:30:01,751 --> 00:30:02,959
Oh, Steph.

543
00:30:03,043 --> 00:30:05,459
That's wonderful. Yes, of course.

544
00:30:05,543 --> 00:30:08,459
I can get you some info on those programs.
There's a lot of great ones.

545
00:30:08,543 --> 00:30:13,084
Uh, no, Marth, I meant, like,
me come back to school, to Harding High,

546
00:30:13,168 --> 00:30:14,543
and finish my senior year.

547
00:30:16,001 --> 00:30:16,918
What?

548
00:30:18,043 --> 00:30:18,918
God.

549
00:30:19,584 --> 00:30:20,501
No…

550
00:30:21,126 --> 00:30:21,959
No?

551
00:30:22,043 --> 00:30:24,418
Or not no, but maybe not?

552
00:30:24,501 --> 00:30:26,043
Steph, hey, you know what?

553
00:30:26,626 --> 00:30:27,918
Instead…

554
00:30:28,001 --> 00:30:30,334
Wow. There's online classes.

555
00:30:30,418 --> 00:30:32,126
Or… or… or… or…

556
00:30:32,209 --> 00:30:35,626
Um… Oh, GED courses
at the community college.

557
00:30:35,709 --> 00:30:38,376
I cannot move on
to the next chapter of my life

558
00:30:38,459 --> 00:30:41,418
if I'm still stuck in the old one
for 20 years.

559
00:30:42,001 --> 00:30:44,251
And I understand that, but…

560
00:30:44,876 --> 00:30:47,959
Steph… …I can't let
an almost 40-year-old woman

561
00:30:48,043 --> 00:30:49,209
into high school.

562
00:30:49,293 --> 00:30:54,501
Yeah, but you heard the doctor.
I'm still 17 mentally.

563
00:30:54,584 --> 00:30:55,751
-And look…
-That's--

564
00:30:55,834 --> 00:30:59,668
…that is medical.
And you cannot argue with science.

565
00:30:59,751 --> 00:31:02,418
-Are you sure you're ready to go back?
-Yes!

566
00:31:02,501 --> 00:31:06,001
High school was like yesterday for me.
It will not be weird at all.

567
00:31:06,876 --> 00:31:08,418
What else am I supposed to do?

568
00:31:08,501 --> 00:31:11,959
Start an OnlyFans account?
Queef for 20 dollars?

569
00:31:12,043 --> 00:31:13,334
-What?
-That's…

570
00:31:13,418 --> 00:31:15,126
I think that's what happens there.

571
00:31:15,209 --> 00:31:18,293
Those aren't your only two options.
You have lots of options.

572
00:31:18,876 --> 00:31:22,584
Look… …high school,
it's an intense but delicate ecosystem.

573
00:31:22,668 --> 00:31:24,626
Yeah, which I can handle.

574
00:31:25,209 --> 00:31:27,876
But you know what? There's only a month
of the school year left--

575
00:31:27,959 --> 00:31:30,584
Oh, that's perfect!
That's basically the time that I missed!

576
00:31:31,334 --> 00:31:34,334
-Oh, yeah.
-Oh, that is, like, fate.

577
00:31:34,418 --> 00:31:36,584
Like, Destiny's Child.

578
00:31:38,334 --> 00:31:42,001
Well, you might be
the first person in history

579
00:31:42,084 --> 00:31:44,251
to use a doctor's note to get into school.

580
00:31:44,334 --> 00:31:46,751
-My God! Yes!

581
00:31:47,334 --> 00:31:50,334
Martha! Oh my God.
You're the best. You're the best.

582
00:31:50,418 --> 00:31:52,126
I'm so worried.

583
00:31:52,709 --> 00:31:57,334
♪ This time I'm gonna be
Everything I want me to be ♪

584
00:31:57,418 --> 00:31:59,543
♪ So fresh, yeah, so free ♪

585
00:31:59,626 --> 00:32:01,668
♪ I'mma get what's coming to me ♪

586
00:32:01,751 --> 00:32:03,918
♪ No diamonds, no rubies ♪

587
00:32:04,001 --> 00:32:06,584
♪ Gonna keep me down
No, I gotta be ♪

588
00:32:06,668 --> 00:32:09,126
♪ So damn high
Yeah, you'll see ♪

589
00:32:09,209 --> 00:32:11,001
♪ I'mma be where I wanna be ♪

590
00:32:11,084 --> 00:32:14,834
♪ Hold on tight if you want to ride ♪

591
00:32:14,918 --> 00:32:20,293
♪ I'mma reach new heights
Yeah, let's paint the sky ♪

592
00:32:20,376 --> 00:32:22,959
-♪ I'm gonna be your ♪
-♪ Aeroplane ♪

593
00:32:25,751 --> 00:32:26,793
Sorry, babe.

594
00:32:27,376 --> 00:32:28,501
I was in a coma.

595
00:32:28,584 --> 00:32:32,876
-♪ Ooh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

596
00:32:33,376 --> 00:32:35,043
♪ Ooh, oh ♪

597
00:32:35,626 --> 00:32:37,918
-♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
-♪ Give it to me ♪

598
00:32:38,001 --> 00:32:43,418
♪ I'm so addicted to the loving
That you're feeding to me ♪

599
00:32:47,543 --> 00:32:51,168
-♪ Oh, baby, baby ♪

600
00:32:51,251 --> 00:32:55,793
♪ Body's in withdrawal
Every time you take it away… ♪

601
00:32:55,876 --> 00:32:58,293
Miss Conway! Miss Conway! Miss Conway!

602
00:32:58,376 --> 00:33:01,209
Hi!
G'day, mate!

603
00:33:01,293 --> 00:33:04,626
I wanted to say hi in your native tongue.
'Cause you're Australian, right?

604
00:33:04,709 --> 00:33:06,459
-Yes. Yeah.
-Oh, good, good, good!

605
00:33:06,543 --> 00:33:09,668
Your friend, my boss, Principal Riser,
asked me to show you around

606
00:33:09,751 --> 00:33:12,084
and give you a little orientation
here at Harding.

607
00:33:12,168 --> 00:33:15,001
Oh, okay. I don't really need to.
I know my way around.

608
00:33:15,084 --> 00:33:18,543
Oh, come on, it's fun.
I have nothing else to do.

609
00:33:18,626 --> 00:33:22,334
I'm Mr. Tapper, the guidance counselor,
but you can call me Mr. T.

610
00:33:22,418 --> 00:33:26,293
Is that because you…
…"pity the fool" who has a bad first day?

611
00:33:26,376 --> 00:33:27,709
Oh.

612
00:33:27,793 --> 00:33:31,293
Well, yeah. Yeah, I would feel…
I would feel terrible.

613
00:33:31,376 --> 00:33:34,251
No. I meant, like,
you know, Mr. T.

614
00:33:34,334 --> 00:33:37,251
"I pity the fool. I pity the fool."

615
00:33:37,334 --> 00:33:41,543
I've never said that before, but I guess
I could start if you wanted me to.

616
00:33:41,626 --> 00:33:42,918
I pity the fool!

617
00:33:43,709 --> 00:33:46,001
Mr. T is pitying fools over here.

618
00:33:46,084 --> 00:33:50,043
All right, let's, um…
let's… let's go on a little tour here.

619
00:33:50,126 --> 00:33:53,334
I have your records here from 2002.
You were a cheerleader.

620
00:33:53,418 --> 00:33:55,668
-Cheer captain.
-Ooh, cheer captain.

621
00:33:55,751 --> 00:34:00,168
Uh, president of the Fashion Club.
Whoa! Your grades were pretty good.

622
00:34:00,251 --> 00:34:03,959
My God, shut up. Don't. I don't want
anybody here to think I'm a dork.

623
00:34:04,043 --> 00:34:05,834
I'm saying
graduating shouldn't be a problem.

624
00:34:05,918 --> 00:34:07,001
Wait. What happened?

625
00:34:07,668 --> 00:34:09,918
Where are
all the prom king and queen winners?

626
00:34:10,001 --> 00:34:13,918
Oh, um, Principal Riser felt
that it sent a bad message,

627
00:34:14,001 --> 00:34:16,376
so she replaced it
with something more positive.

628
00:34:17,168 --> 00:34:19,626
-That looks like a bunch of tampons.
-Yeah, it is.

629
00:34:19,709 --> 00:34:21,418
But it's also found art.

630
00:34:21,918 --> 00:34:24,293
So you're saying they're found tampons.

631
00:34:25,168 --> 00:34:27,668
Oh, yes, I am.

632
00:34:40,584 --> 00:34:44,126
If not, just pretend
it's fake history.

633
00:34:44,209 --> 00:34:45,376
Oh! I am so sorry.

634
00:34:46,793 --> 00:34:47,626
Stephanie?

635
00:34:48,293 --> 00:34:49,918
-Oh my God!
-It… it's… it's Seth!

636
00:34:50,001 --> 00:34:51,334
-Seth?
-Yeah!

637
00:34:51,418 --> 00:34:53,084
-Oh, Seth!
-Oh my goodness!

638
00:34:53,168 --> 00:34:54,918
-Oh!
-Wow!

639
00:34:55,001 --> 00:34:56,709
Martha said that you were back,

640
00:34:56,793 --> 00:34:59,543
and I guess, in my head,
I just couldn't make it real,

641
00:34:59,626 --> 00:35:01,293
but look at you. You look great!

642
00:35:01,376 --> 00:35:04,293
It's me! Like, look,
I'm walking and talking.

643
00:35:04,376 --> 00:35:06,209
-Yeah. Doing all those things.
-Everything.

644
00:35:06,293 --> 00:35:08,001
Just like you used to, walk and talk.

645
00:35:08,084 --> 00:35:10,668
Well, look at you! Oh my God!

646
00:35:10,751 --> 00:35:14,626
-You look so cool and suave and adult.
-Yeah.

647
00:35:14,709 --> 00:35:17,751
Wow! What happened to that nerd
that used to just hang out in the library?

648
00:35:17,834 --> 00:35:20,043
He became the school librarian.

649
00:35:20,834 --> 00:35:21,959
Seriously?

650
00:35:22,043 --> 00:35:23,126
-Mm-hmm.
-Ah…

651
00:35:23,209 --> 00:35:25,376
Seth, thank you so much for the yearbook.

652
00:35:25,459 --> 00:35:27,501
Why didn't you just come in and say hi?

653
00:35:27,584 --> 00:35:31,501
You know,
I didn't wanna overwhelm you, you know.

654
00:35:31,584 --> 00:35:34,001
Plus, I can't stay out so late
on a school night.

655
00:35:34,084 --> 00:35:36,709
-Ah, shit. Shoot.

656
00:35:36,793 --> 00:35:37,626
Dang!

657
00:35:38,126 --> 00:35:42,126
I wish I could hang out and talk more,
but I gotta get back to work.

658
00:35:42,209 --> 00:35:44,834
-Oh, yeah, I got to get back to class.
-Yeah.

659
00:35:44,918 --> 00:35:46,959
I don't wanna be
20 years and ten minutes late.

660
00:35:47,626 --> 00:35:50,959
So, I will see you around.
You know where to find me.

661
00:35:51,043 --> 00:35:54,459
Yeah, same.
You know where to find me, in the library.

662
00:35:54,543 --> 00:35:57,709
-Some things never change, right?
-Bye, Seth. I'll call you.

663
00:35:58,543 --> 00:36:00,876
Or you can do some long division, I guess.

664
00:36:04,043 --> 00:36:06,001
Steph, how's your first day?

665
00:36:06,084 --> 00:36:09,251
Oh my God,
it's just been, like, so amazing.

666
00:36:09,334 --> 00:36:12,709
Like, just making new friends.
Everyone's already obsessed with me.

667
00:36:12,793 --> 00:36:16,043
That's so great. We strive
for a welcoming environment here.

668
00:36:16,126 --> 00:36:19,751
Um, listen, I need to talk to you
about rejoining the Bulldogettes.

669
00:36:19,834 --> 00:36:23,043
Um, instead of cheer, I think
you should be focusing on your schoolwork.

670
00:36:23,126 --> 00:36:25,168
Yeah. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure!

671
00:36:25,251 --> 00:36:28,584
Um, but who do I talk to about rejoining?

672
00:36:29,918 --> 00:36:32,793
Well, you would talk to me.
I'm the cheer coach now.

673
00:36:32,876 --> 00:36:35,043
Okay. Wait, I see your game.

674
00:36:35,126 --> 00:36:36,418
You become principal

675
00:36:36,501 --> 00:36:40,001
so then you can get real power
by running the cheer squad.

676
00:36:40,084 --> 00:36:41,793
That's smart. I respect that.

677
00:36:41,876 --> 00:36:45,209
Yeah, that… that's not why
I got my master's in education.

678
00:36:45,293 --> 00:36:47,709
Um, look, I don't think the cheer squad

679
00:36:47,793 --> 00:36:49,251
needs a new member right now.

680
00:36:49,834 --> 00:36:52,376
Well, that's wrong
'cause every cheer squad in the country

681
00:36:52,459 --> 00:36:53,709
would love to have me.

682
00:36:53,793 --> 00:36:57,626
There's only two performances left,
so I don't think it's worth it.

683
00:36:57,709 --> 00:37:00,543
Marth, I only need
one performance to make a splash

684
00:37:00,626 --> 00:37:02,584
if I have any chance
of becoming prom queen.

685
00:37:03,918 --> 00:37:06,168
-Steph…
-This head still needs a crown.

686
00:37:06,251 --> 00:37:09,959
I'm so sorry.
It's not gonna get it.

687
00:37:10,043 --> 00:37:10,918
Steph,

688
00:37:11,834 --> 00:37:14,459
we do not have
prom queen at this school anymore.

689
00:37:19,751 --> 00:37:21,876
Oh my God, are you having a mini stroke?

690
00:37:26,334 --> 00:37:27,209
What?

691
00:37:27,293 --> 00:37:29,709
Competitions like that, they're dangerous.

692
00:37:29,793 --> 00:37:33,293
Winning things, it just…
it doesn't reflect our school values.

693
00:37:33,376 --> 00:37:36,668
With no winners, there aren't any losers.

694
00:37:36,751 --> 00:37:39,543
I've made a school with no losers.

695
00:37:39,626 --> 00:37:43,251
But everybody was just talking to me
about how much they want prom queen.

696
00:37:43,334 --> 00:37:47,334
Steph, if all the students want it back,
they know they can petition for it.

697
00:37:47,418 --> 00:37:49,084
But so far no one has.

698
00:37:49,168 --> 00:37:51,418
Oh, that was so close.
You were so close.

699
00:37:51,501 --> 00:37:54,334
-Let me put it my mouth.
-One more. Ready and one…

700
00:37:54,959 --> 00:37:56,543
Yay!

701
00:37:56,626 --> 00:37:59,376
Oh, hey, is this where the ho-bags sit?

702
00:38:00,084 --> 00:38:02,418
♪ Ho-ing down with the ho-bags, yeah ♪

703
00:38:03,001 --> 00:38:05,418
♪ Ho… ♪
That's a fun way of saying "what's up?"

704
00:38:05,501 --> 00:38:07,876
-I'm Janet.
-And I'm Yaz, and that's Neil.

705
00:38:07,959 --> 00:38:10,251
I just have to say I'm living
for this little vintage fit.

706
00:38:10,334 --> 00:38:12,501
-And I'm not even JK-ing. Okay?

707
00:38:12,584 --> 00:38:16,293
Okay, what is with
this enormous lunch table?

708
00:38:16,376 --> 00:38:18,584
How are we supposed to know
where the popular kids sit?

709
00:38:18,668 --> 00:38:22,501
Well, when there's just one table,
we're all popular kids.

710
00:38:22,584 --> 00:38:24,751
-Everybody.
-Oh no, no, no. That's not how life works.

711
00:38:24,834 --> 00:38:26,834
There's only, like, three ways
to become popular,

712
00:38:26,918 --> 00:38:29,501
to be a cheerleader,
to work at Abercrombie,

713
00:38:29,584 --> 00:38:31,251
or to let guys go in the back door.

714
00:38:31,334 --> 00:38:33,209
-What?
-Oh my God, I must be really popular then.

715
00:38:33,293 --> 00:38:35,459
-What?

716
00:38:36,459 --> 00:38:38,793
-Nothing.
-Anyways, um, Janet…

717
00:38:38,876 --> 00:38:40,209
Mm-hmm.

718
00:38:40,293 --> 00:38:43,793
…I was wondering
if you would like to sign my petition.

719
00:38:43,876 --> 00:38:46,084
It's to bring back
prom queen to Harding High.

720
00:38:46,168 --> 00:38:48,584
-Oh my gosh!
-No way!

721
00:38:48,668 --> 00:38:50,626
Do I respect IRL grassroot efforts

722
00:38:50,709 --> 00:38:53,126
to effect change
into societal systems? Yes.

723
00:38:53,209 --> 00:38:56,793
It's also very refreshing
to see non-digital campaign strategy.

724
00:38:56,876 --> 00:38:58,376
-It is.
-So I'll sign it.

725
00:38:58,459 --> 00:39:01,834
I'll sign it too, but don't be surprised
if we're the only ones.

726
00:39:02,418 --> 00:39:03,584
Why's that?

727
00:39:03,668 --> 00:39:06,251
Because nobody's gonna sign this
unless Bri Luvs signs it.

728
00:39:06,334 --> 00:39:08,168
-Who?
-Her.

729
00:39:08,793 --> 00:39:11,501
Bri Luvs.
That's just her name on social media.

730
00:39:11,584 --> 00:39:14,334
She's got, like,
three million Instagram followers.

731
00:39:14,418 --> 00:39:18,834
And that 98 pounds of sexy is Lance,
her fine-ass boyfriend.

732
00:39:18,918 --> 00:39:21,834
Last year, Vice did a whole vlog
about their open relaish

733
00:39:21,918 --> 00:39:24,709
and called it
the gold standard of the future.

734
00:39:24,793 --> 00:39:27,209
Cool, cool, cool.
So, um, how do I get her to sign it?

735
00:39:27,293 --> 00:39:30,251
Oh, you won't. She's untouchable.

736
00:39:30,334 --> 00:39:33,293
Okay, everyone's friends with her,
but she's friends with no one.

737
00:39:33,376 --> 00:39:34,209
Yeah.

738
00:39:34,293 --> 00:39:36,168
-She's coming over here.
-No, she's not.

739
00:39:36,251 --> 00:39:38,418
-Just act normal. Avoid eye contact and--
-Okay.

740
00:39:38,501 --> 00:39:42,126
-Yaz! Been a minute, huh?
-It has been so long.

741
00:39:42,209 --> 00:39:46,543
So long! And Janet, loved your post about
alternative body positivity the other day.

742
00:39:46,626 --> 00:39:48,418
You are so inspiring.

743
00:39:48,501 --> 00:39:50,834
I was just showing off
my new bathing suit.

744
00:39:50,918 --> 00:39:53,918
Hi, I'm Bri, and you must be Stephanie.

745
00:39:54,001 --> 00:39:55,084
I heard about you.

746
00:39:55,168 --> 00:39:56,793
Really?

747
00:39:56,876 --> 00:39:57,834
I mean, um…

748
00:39:58,876 --> 00:40:01,709
Yeah, obviously,
because I'm, like, the total shiznit,

749
00:40:01,793 --> 00:40:04,584
and I basically used to be you
when I went here.

750
00:40:04,668 --> 00:40:07,584
You know, the most popular girl in school
'cause we're the same.

751
00:40:07,668 --> 00:40:09,918
I don't really think about popularity.

752
00:40:10,001 --> 00:40:12,709
I'm just trying to build
my most authentic, socially conscious,

753
00:40:12,793 --> 00:40:16,168
body-positive, environmentally aware,
and economically compassionate brand

754
00:40:16,251 --> 00:40:18,543
that's a home for inclusion,
focused fashion, food,

755
00:40:18,626 --> 00:40:20,001
and fun-filled lifestyles.

756
00:40:20,084 --> 00:40:22,959
And if tons of people respond to that,
then, great.

757
00:40:23,543 --> 00:40:25,793
Totally. Yes.

758
00:40:25,876 --> 00:40:28,334
I mean, obviously.

759
00:40:28,418 --> 00:40:31,376
Um, while I've got you here,
would you mind signing this?

760
00:40:31,459 --> 00:40:33,584
I'm gonna stop you right there.

761
00:40:33,668 --> 00:40:37,293
I made a paper-free pledge this year,
so I only deal with forms digitally.

762
00:40:37,376 --> 00:40:40,334
I'm sure you understand.
But can we take an ussie?

763
00:40:40,918 --> 00:40:42,834
Yes. Absolutely.

764
00:40:42,918 --> 00:40:45,459
-Where to?

765
00:40:45,543 --> 00:40:48,043
Where are we going? We're going--
Ooh. What? Sorry.

766
00:40:49,959 --> 00:40:51,668
-What was that?
-Oh, before I forget.

767
00:40:51,751 --> 00:40:54,418
My mom, Tiffany,
told me to tell you she says hi.

768
00:40:54,501 --> 00:40:56,459
She said to remind you
she's married to Blaine

769
00:40:56,543 --> 00:40:58,709
and lives in your dream house,
in case you couldn't place her.

770
00:40:58,793 --> 00:41:00,709
Your mom, Tiffany.

771
00:41:00,793 --> 00:41:02,876
Nice meeting you, Stephanie. Bye.

772
00:41:03,584 --> 00:41:05,293
-Bye.
-Bye.

773
00:41:06,168 --> 00:41:08,459
Baby, you're manspreading again.

774
00:41:08,543 --> 00:41:09,418
Oh.

775
00:41:09,501 --> 00:41:10,793
-Whoops.

776
00:41:12,334 --> 00:41:14,876
Oh my God. He knows you exist.

777
00:41:14,959 --> 00:41:18,376
Yeah, 'cause probably
he's, like, already obsessed with me.

778
00:41:18,459 --> 00:41:21,668
-Oh my God. What is that? A fire drill?

779
00:41:21,751 --> 00:41:23,293
-Uh…
-What, robot invasion?

780
00:41:23,376 --> 00:41:24,376
Bri is going live.

781
00:41:25,001 --> 00:41:28,793
Hey, guys, we have a new student
at Harding High, and she's older than us.

782
00:41:28,876 --> 00:41:31,543
And I want to remind
everyone around the world

783
00:41:31,626 --> 00:41:35,043
that treating someone different
'cause they're elderly is called ageism,

784
00:41:35,126 --> 00:41:38,418
no matter how weird or foreign
or out of touch they may seem,

785
00:41:39,001 --> 00:41:40,209
and that's not cool.

786
00:41:40,793 --> 00:41:42,751
Also, stay tuned. I have amazing news

787
00:41:42,834 --> 00:41:45,709
about my upcoming summer
screen-detox vacay in Nepal.

788
00:41:45,793 --> 00:41:49,543
Remember, Bri loves you.

789
00:41:50,626 --> 00:41:51,584
That was hot.

790
00:41:52,168 --> 00:41:53,168
You're hot.

791
00:41:55,001 --> 00:41:57,834
-I'll sign your petition.
-Oh my God! Yay! Three people!

792
00:41:57,918 --> 00:41:59,126
-Whoo!
-Oh my God, no.

793
00:41:59,209 --> 00:42:01,543
Guys, I need
the cheerleaders to sign this.

794
00:42:01,626 --> 00:42:03,751
Because then everyone will.
Cheer pressure.

795
00:42:03,834 --> 00:42:07,084
Well, they'll sign it
'cause we already did.

796
00:42:07,918 --> 00:42:08,751
Ha!

797
00:42:08,834 --> 00:42:11,459
-You guys are the cheerleaders?
-Absolutely.

798
00:42:13,126 --> 00:42:15,376
-Ready?
-Okay!

799
00:42:15,459 --> 00:42:17,751
♪ The Earth is smoking ♪

800
00:42:17,834 --> 00:42:19,793
♪ We need new laws ♪

801
00:42:20,626 --> 00:42:25,584
♪ Turtles are choking on plastic straws ♪

802
00:42:27,126 --> 00:42:29,876
Oh.
Good job, good job. What'd you think?

803
00:42:31,126 --> 00:42:32,334
What was that?

804
00:42:32,876 --> 00:42:35,209
-Well, that's--
-What was that?

805
00:42:36,209 --> 00:42:38,876
-It's our most popular routine.
-Yeah.

806
00:42:39,834 --> 00:42:42,668
-Well, who were you guys cheering for?
-For everyone.

807
00:42:42,751 --> 00:42:45,668
You know, to do the right thing, right?
Team Humanity!

808
00:42:45,751 --> 00:42:47,084
Team Humanity!

809
00:42:47,168 --> 00:42:48,793
Uh…

810
00:42:48,876 --> 00:42:51,834
But what about, like, the music
and the dancing and the flipping?

811
00:42:51,918 --> 00:42:55,043
Oh. Oh no. No.
We do not do stunts anymore.

812
00:42:55,126 --> 00:42:57,834
-Oh.
-And also we don't do any sexy dancing.

813
00:42:57,918 --> 00:43:00,876
We'd rather have people listen
to our words than just our bodies.

814
00:43:00,959 --> 00:43:03,543
Okay, yeah, but this cheer
would be so much better

815
00:43:03,626 --> 00:43:07,126
if you guys made me believe you were
seconds away from showing your tits.

816
00:43:07,209 --> 00:43:09,043
-No, Steph…
-Yes, Martha.

817
00:43:09,126 --> 00:43:11,793
-Okay.
-Yes. I had this one signature move.

818
00:43:11,876 --> 00:43:15,418
You'll love it. It's called lips to lips.
Everybody, do it with me.

819
00:43:15,501 --> 00:43:17,084
-Don't.
-You start on the face.

820
00:43:17,168 --> 00:43:18,709
-Fingers go down the body.
-No.

821
00:43:18,793 --> 00:43:20,251
Down the body and up.

822
00:43:20,334 --> 00:43:22,751
No! Why is everyone doing it?
I'm saying don't do it.

823
00:43:22,834 --> 00:43:24,334
-Okay, look.
-Okay.

824
00:43:24,418 --> 00:43:27,584
We would do that, but our freshman year,
Bri Luvs made an Instagram post

825
00:43:27,668 --> 00:43:29,834
saying that cheerleaders
were anti-feminist.

826
00:43:29,918 --> 00:43:32,334
The whole school turned against us,
and we had to recalibrate.

827
00:43:32,418 --> 00:43:34,834
Her post got, like, seven million likes.

828
00:43:34,918 --> 00:43:36,418
-Eight million.
-It was for the best.

829
00:43:36,501 --> 00:43:39,209
Anyways, let's show her
our gun control routine.

830
00:43:39,293 --> 00:43:40,876
-It's one of our best.
-No, wait!

831
00:43:40,959 --> 00:43:43,501
What even is this squad? Like…

832
00:43:45,334 --> 00:43:46,834
Is there even a cheer captain?

833
00:43:46,918 --> 00:43:49,084
-Yeah.
-Yeah, Stephanie, I am the cheer captain.

834
00:43:49,168 --> 00:43:51,418
-I am the cheer captain.
-I am the cheer captain.

835
00:43:51,501 --> 00:43:53,293
I'm a cheer captain.

836
00:43:53,376 --> 00:43:54,543
-And also the coach.
-You?

837
00:43:55,668 --> 00:43:58,584
Martha, that's the most fucked up thing
I've ever heard.

838
00:43:58,668 --> 00:44:02,334
Steph, we are all cheer captains here
to promote… Say it with me.

839
00:44:02,418 --> 00:44:05,084
Equality!

840
00:44:05,168 --> 00:44:08,293
-Including you, Steph.
-Welcome.

841
00:44:08,376 --> 00:44:10,959
-Do you love it? Are you okay?

842
00:44:11,751 --> 00:44:13,043
Oh my God.

843
00:44:13,126 --> 00:44:15,376
-Oh my God.
-She loves it, you guys. You nailed it!

844
00:44:18,043 --> 00:44:20,001
-Oh my God!
-Aw!

845
00:44:23,709 --> 00:44:25,168
Excuse me, Mr. Bud.

846
00:44:25,251 --> 00:44:26,543
Hey, what's up?

847
00:44:26,626 --> 00:44:28,543
Um, seeing as you're my librarian now,

848
00:44:28,626 --> 00:44:31,668
you're legally obligated
to help me research something, yeah?

849
00:44:31,751 --> 00:44:32,584
Yeah, by law.

850
00:44:32,668 --> 00:44:36,334
Yeah, I think the teachers union's
a real stickler about that sort of thing.

851
00:44:36,418 --> 00:44:39,251
I'm just kidding.
I'm not in the union. What's up?

852
00:44:39,334 --> 00:44:41,876
-Oh, this is addictive.
-Yeah.

853
00:44:41,959 --> 00:44:45,126
Social platforms have become
a vital tool for communication.

854
00:44:45,209 --> 00:44:48,293
Look, it's a turtle humping a rock!

855
00:44:48,376 --> 00:44:49,709
-Yeah.
-Oh, get it. Get it.

856
00:44:49,793 --> 00:44:51,459
Yeah, oh, that gets a heart.

857
00:44:51,543 --> 00:44:52,959
-And it's also that.

858
00:44:53,043 --> 00:44:55,834
Okay. All right.
I think I've worked this thing out.

859
00:44:55,918 --> 00:44:56,751
Okay.

860
00:44:56,834 --> 00:44:59,501
So, basically you get followers
by being somebody everybody likes.

861
00:44:59,584 --> 00:45:00,418
Mm-hmm.

862
00:45:00,501 --> 00:45:03,709
So it's a popularity contest,
but instead of just high school,

863
00:45:03,793 --> 00:45:06,793
it's now the whole world,
and the whole world is your phone.

864
00:45:06,876 --> 00:45:08,751
Yeah. I mean, that's exactly it.

865
00:45:08,834 --> 00:45:10,584
-That's it.
-Yeah, it's pretty sad.

866
00:45:10,668 --> 00:45:14,293
No! This is, like, amazing.
This is like a shortcut.

867
00:45:14,376 --> 00:45:17,543
Wow, I immediately regret
showing you this.

868
00:45:17,626 --> 00:45:19,793
Just to be clear,
this is a way for people to pretend

869
00:45:19,876 --> 00:45:22,043
their life and skin texture
is better than it is.

870
00:45:22,126 --> 00:45:25,751
Is that why you've posted this picture
of you with this random hot chick?

871
00:45:25,834 --> 00:45:28,668
No, that's my ex-fiancée Diana.

872
00:45:28,751 --> 00:45:30,501
-You were engaged?
-I was.

873
00:45:30,584 --> 00:45:33,168
-Shut up! Seth.
- Uh-huh.

874
00:45:33,251 --> 00:45:35,084
That's actually how I ended up here.

875
00:45:35,168 --> 00:45:37,959
We both were working
at the National Archives in DC,

876
00:45:38,043 --> 00:45:40,376
and when we split up, I needed a change.

877
00:45:40,459 --> 00:45:43,001
So Martha got me a job at Harding,
and here I am.

878
00:45:43,084 --> 00:45:45,626
Trust me, being close to 40
and back at my high school

879
00:45:45,709 --> 00:45:47,251
isn't exactly where I wanted to be, but…

880
00:45:47,334 --> 00:45:50,126
-Oh. Tell me about it!
-Yeah, right!

881
00:45:50,209 --> 00:45:53,501
Uh, well, I should get back
to enriching young minds.

882
00:45:53,584 --> 00:45:55,334
Just kidding. I'm covering a drama class.

883
00:45:55,418 --> 00:45:56,668
-I'll see you later.
-Okay.

884
00:45:56,751 --> 00:45:58,751
-All right. Oh!
-Bye!

885
00:46:02,043 --> 00:46:04,209
Need that back. Yeah, thanks, Steph.

886
00:46:05,376 --> 00:46:06,543
Please, Dad!

887
00:46:07,084 --> 00:46:09,376
Phones are like the new Tamagotchis.

888
00:46:09,459 --> 00:46:13,918
Okay? I need one, and I promise you,
I will not go over the minutes.

889
00:46:14,001 --> 00:46:17,834
Really, it's for my own personal safety,
'cause what happens if I get kidnapped?

890
00:46:17,918 --> 00:46:21,293
I think if you get kidnapped, Stephanie,
they'll probably take your phone.

891
00:46:21,376 --> 00:46:23,959
Not if I'd hidden it up my…

892
00:46:24,043 --> 00:46:27,459
Well, just to be safe,
it's probably a good thing.

893
00:46:28,084 --> 00:46:29,209
I got you this.

894
00:46:30,876 --> 00:46:32,959
Oh my God.

895
00:46:37,376 --> 00:46:38,293
Dad…

896
00:46:39,751 --> 00:46:41,418
-Thank you!
-You're welcome.

897
00:46:41,501 --> 00:46:43,418
Oh, you're the best dad!

898
00:46:46,043 --> 00:46:48,543
Dad, I can't believe this!

899
00:46:49,376 --> 00:46:51,876
Hey, guys, uh, it's just me, Stephanie.

900
00:46:51,959 --> 00:46:54,376
-I'm just chilling at my crib.

901
00:46:54,459 --> 00:46:56,126
I don't even know how to do this.

902
00:46:56,209 --> 00:47:00,918
I was just thinking that we should bring
prom queen back to Harding High.

903
00:47:01,001 --> 00:47:02,418
-#AwesomeIdea.

904
00:47:02,501 --> 00:47:04,251
-#Yes.

905
00:47:04,334 --> 00:47:07,251
-Spread it around. Let's make it a virus.

906
00:47:07,334 --> 00:47:08,584
That's… that's cute.

907
00:47:08,668 --> 00:47:10,834
Remember to vote
for this year's prom theme.

908
00:47:10,918 --> 00:47:13,334
The choices are A, Bridgerton,

909
00:47:13,418 --> 00:47:14,918
B, pride,

910
00:47:15,001 --> 00:47:18,793
and a last-minute write-in submission
by Stephanie Conway, C,

911
00:47:18,876 --> 00:47:20,793
The Real - New Orleans.

912
00:47:21,376 --> 00:47:23,668
-Democracy works only if you vote!
-What?

913
00:47:23,751 --> 00:47:26,459
-Stop, stop, stop.
-Love you all!

914
00:47:26,543 --> 00:47:28,209
-Oh my God.
-Are you going over there?

915
00:47:28,293 --> 00:47:29,334
-Okay.
-So fire.

916
00:47:29,418 --> 00:47:31,668
Let's wait
until the party to tell everyone.

917
00:47:31,751 --> 00:47:34,584
Oh my God,
is there a party happening? Whoo!

918
00:47:34,668 --> 00:47:37,668
Oh. Hi, Stephanie. What's up?

919
00:47:37,751 --> 00:47:41,001
I just came to say we're, like, cool.

920
00:47:41,084 --> 00:47:43,834
Okay? Even after the other day
when you, like, said I was old and shit.

921
00:47:43,918 --> 00:47:46,126
Oh, did you think that was mean?

922
00:47:46,209 --> 00:47:47,501
I am so sorry.

923
00:47:47,584 --> 00:47:48,834
I was just shedding light

924
00:47:48,918 --> 00:47:50,876
on an often overlooked
discrimination issue.

925
00:47:50,959 --> 00:47:52,251
Look, okay, I get.

926
00:47:52,334 --> 00:47:55,584
Queen bee feels very threatened
by the hot new girl

927
00:47:55,668 --> 00:47:57,501
and decides to go on the offensive.

928
00:47:57,584 --> 00:48:00,418
Classic Sandy/Rizzo.
It was the same way with your mum.

929
00:48:00,501 --> 00:48:03,293
I am not my mom. I'm nothing like her.

930
00:48:03,376 --> 00:48:06,793
So whatever went on between you two
has nothing to do with me.

931
00:48:06,876 --> 00:48:11,084
Awesome. Okay, so now that we're friends,
can you follow me on Insta?

932
00:48:11,168 --> 00:48:16,709
I'm "A" with this little circle around it
hot coma girl 113.

933
00:48:16,793 --> 00:48:19,626
Who knew?
There's 112 other hot coma girls.

934
00:48:19,709 --> 00:48:23,168
Mm-hmm. Okay, so I get this request a lot.

935
00:48:23,251 --> 00:48:25,459
Um, I limit my follows,

936
00:48:25,543 --> 00:48:28,126
'cause if I follow one person,
another might get mad,

937
00:48:28,209 --> 00:48:31,209
so it's a sacrifice I make
for everyone's mental health.

938
00:48:31,293 --> 00:48:33,334
Um, but good luck getting followers.

939
00:48:33,418 --> 00:48:36,084
Okay.
Well, wait, can you follow me?

940
00:48:36,793 --> 00:48:38,709
Can I follow her on Instagram?

941
00:48:38,793 --> 00:48:39,626
No.

942
00:48:40,126 --> 00:48:41,001
I can't.

943
00:48:41,084 --> 00:48:42,626
Sorry.

944
00:48:53,334 --> 00:48:54,709
Hey, Steph.

945
00:48:54,793 --> 00:48:57,459
-Holy shit. Mmm.
-Um, I'm doing a makeup tutorial.

946
00:48:57,543 --> 00:48:59,543
For who? Batman villains?

947
00:48:59,626 --> 00:49:01,751
I'm just really needing
some new followers.

948
00:49:01,834 --> 00:49:04,501
You don't realize
how many people don't care about you

949
00:49:04,584 --> 00:49:06,459
until you see it
as a number on your phone.

950
00:49:06,543 --> 00:49:10,209
Okay. Well, if you get tired
of being an influencer,

951
00:49:10,293 --> 00:49:13,751
the Natural History Museum is showing
Deep Impact on their IMAX all week.

952
00:49:13,834 --> 00:49:15,543
So, maybe we could go this weekend?

953
00:49:15,626 --> 00:49:17,668
Deep Impact again?

954
00:49:17,751 --> 00:49:21,584
Oh my God. You, me, and Martha
just watched that a couple weekends ago.

955
00:49:22,918 --> 00:49:26,293
Oh no, actually, I think you're thinking
of 1,000 weekends ago.

956
00:49:27,501 --> 00:49:29,459
Oh. Right.

957
00:49:29,543 --> 00:49:33,334
Mm. Okay, I would go,
but I've got a party this weekend.

958
00:49:33,418 --> 00:49:36,918
Oh, cool. Uh, you know, what night?
I'm completely free.

959
00:49:37,001 --> 00:49:40,543
I don't actually know yet,
so I'm just keeping my schedule open.

960
00:49:40,626 --> 00:49:42,709
Right.

961
00:49:43,251 --> 00:49:44,293
Just to be clear,

962
00:49:44,376 --> 00:49:46,751
you're saying no to attend
a party you haven't been invited to

963
00:49:46,834 --> 00:49:48,501
and don't know
when or where it's happening?

964
00:49:48,584 --> 00:49:51,334
Yeah. Okay, I gotta get back
to my contouring.

965
00:49:54,043 --> 00:49:54,918
All right.

966
00:49:58,334 --> 00:49:59,751
So hot.

967
00:49:59,834 --> 00:50:02,459
I mean, even just an hour a night,
that would be amazing.

968
00:50:02,543 --> 00:50:04,043
-I can make that happen.
-Yeah.

969
00:50:04,126 --> 00:50:04,959
Okay.

970
00:50:06,918 --> 00:50:07,876
What's going on?

971
00:50:08,959 --> 00:50:12,584
Why are you guys acting sus?
What? Don't say…

972
00:50:13,334 --> 00:50:16,959
Are you two together? Oh my God.
I'm not calling you Mum!

973
00:50:17,043 --> 00:50:20,334
Martha tells me you're already
falling behind in your classes.

974
00:50:20,418 --> 00:50:22,876
Are you doing crack cocaine?

975
00:50:22,959 --> 00:50:24,209
No.

976
00:50:24,293 --> 00:50:27,251
Dad, I'm just still adjusting.

977
00:50:28,043 --> 00:50:30,876
I just found out there were
eight more Fast and Furious movies.

978
00:50:30,959 --> 00:50:34,418
I just wanna make sure that you're giving
your schoolwork the attention it deserves.

979
00:50:34,501 --> 00:50:36,668
Well, I've just been really busy

980
00:50:36,751 --> 00:50:38,918
with super important stuff,
like making friends.

981
00:50:39,001 --> 00:50:41,543
-Well, good. I'm… That's great.
-Mm-hmm.

982
00:50:41,626 --> 00:50:43,626
-But you can still do your homework.
-Yep!

983
00:50:43,709 --> 00:50:46,084
You're smart, Steph,
always have been.

984
00:50:46,168 --> 00:50:48,668
I don't wanna see you
use this second chance incorrectly.

985
00:50:48,751 --> 00:50:51,501
Okay. Well, I've got
the solution for this.

986
00:50:51,584 --> 00:50:52,959
No phone for the weekend.

987
00:50:53,043 --> 00:50:54,543
-What?
-Mm-hmm.

988
00:50:55,584 --> 00:50:57,418
Dad, no. How else will I live?

989
00:50:57,501 --> 00:51:00,043
You survived 20 years without solid food.

990
00:51:00,126 --> 00:51:02,251
You can go for a weekend
without your iPhone, hon.

991
00:51:02,334 --> 00:51:03,751
-No!
-Hand it over.

992
00:51:03,834 --> 00:51:06,126
-Are you being serious?
-Yes. I am being very--

993
00:51:06,209 --> 00:51:08,084
Are you being full serious right now?

994
00:51:08,168 --> 00:51:10,043
-Full serious.
-Are you from Syria?

995
00:51:10,126 --> 00:51:11,168
I'm very serious.

996
00:51:11,251 --> 00:51:12,501
No!

997
00:51:13,918 --> 00:51:14,918
No!

998
00:51:15,001 --> 00:51:17,543
-Hand me the phone.
-Here, have it, then. Have it.

999
00:51:18,418 --> 00:51:19,251
It's a remote.

1000
00:51:19,334 --> 00:51:22,001
-No!
-Uh…

1001
00:51:22,084 --> 00:51:25,334
-Get off the door frame, honey.
-No! It's my phone!

1002
00:51:25,418 --> 00:51:26,584
Give him the phone.

1003
00:51:26,668 --> 00:51:27,751
No…

1004
00:51:32,793 --> 00:51:34,751
Thanks a lot, Principal Martha.

1005
00:51:35,251 --> 00:51:37,834
Oh my God, Lance and Bri look so hot.

1006
00:51:37,918 --> 00:51:40,501
What the slut? They're all there.

1007
00:51:40,584 --> 00:51:42,459
Can I… can I have my phone back now?

1008
00:51:42,543 --> 00:51:44,251
Oh my God.

1009
00:51:44,334 --> 00:51:46,668
Guys, what kind of psycho world is this

1010
00:51:46,751 --> 00:51:49,751
where the cheerleaders
don't get invited to a party? Hello!

1011
00:51:49,834 --> 00:51:51,876
Are they stupid? We are the party!

1012
00:51:51,959 --> 00:51:53,709
Babe, of course we weren't invited.

1013
00:51:53,793 --> 00:51:55,459
-It's DM VIP.
-Yeah.

1014
00:51:55,543 --> 00:51:57,626
You only get to go to them
if they follow you.

1015
00:51:57,709 --> 00:51:58,959
Only the hot, cool people.

1016
00:51:59,043 --> 00:52:01,543
-Yeah.
-Well, yeah, but we are hot and cool.

1017
00:52:01,626 --> 00:52:02,959
-Thank you.
-Um,

1018
00:52:03,043 --> 00:52:05,501
four years of not getting invited
to those parties,

1019
00:52:05,584 --> 00:52:08,459
the message gets, like, very clear.
We're not.

1020
00:52:09,168 --> 00:52:12,834
This is kind of like a party.
I can have my dad pop in a Di.

1021
00:52:14,959 --> 00:52:16,084
It means "DiGiorno."

1022
00:52:16,168 --> 00:52:18,876
-Oh, oh, oh.
-No, I'm talking about a "party" party.

1023
00:52:18,959 --> 00:52:22,584
I can't have video record of me partying.
The media's gonna use it to try

1024
00:52:22,668 --> 00:52:25,876
and discredit me when I run for office,
like they did with AOC.

1025
00:52:25,959 --> 00:52:26,793
No.

1026
00:52:27,584 --> 00:52:31,668
Okay, guys, you need to listen up,
all right? This is now serious.

1027
00:52:33,709 --> 00:52:37,293
We need to dance
because we need to show everybody

1028
00:52:37,376 --> 00:52:38,709
that we are the cool ones.

1029
00:52:38,793 --> 00:52:42,751
Guys, when I was in high school,
all the popular kids treated me like shit

1030
00:52:42,834 --> 00:52:44,626
until I showed them how cool I was,

1031
00:52:44,709 --> 00:52:48,751
which is so cool that
the most popular girl in high school,

1032
00:52:48,834 --> 00:52:51,501
her boyfriend dumped her for me.

1033
00:52:52,334 --> 00:52:54,459
-And you know who that was?
-Who?

1034
00:52:55,376 --> 00:52:57,084
-Bri's mom.
-Tiffany?

1035
00:52:58,126 --> 00:52:59,126
And that guy,

1036
00:53:00,501 --> 00:53:01,334
Bri's dad.

1037
00:53:01,418 --> 00:53:03,334
♪ Oh my God ♪

1038
00:53:03,418 --> 00:53:04,834
What?

1039
00:53:04,918 --> 00:53:10,043
And once you've blown someone's dad,
you realize they're not that scary.

1040
00:53:10,126 --> 00:53:11,251
-Hmm.
-Good to know.

1041
00:53:11,334 --> 00:53:12,459
Yeah, I mean…

1042
00:53:12,543 --> 00:53:16,918
So, everybody, watch and learn.

1043
00:53:17,001 --> 00:53:17,959
-Let's dance.
-Okay.

1044
00:53:18,043 --> 00:53:20,584
Okay, can you hit play?
Yeah, nice fingering.

1045
00:53:20,668 --> 00:53:23,043
by Britney Spears plays]

1046
00:53:23,126 --> 00:53:24,668
♪ Crazy ♪

1047
00:53:25,209 --> 00:53:29,543
♪ Baby, I'm so into you ♪

1048
00:53:30,209 --> 00:53:34,293
♪ You got that something
What can I do? ♪

1049
00:53:34,876 --> 00:53:39,084
♪ Baby, you spin me around ♪

1050
00:53:39,168 --> 00:53:41,543
-Yeah. Okay, get into it, guys.
-♪ The earth is moving ♪

1051
00:53:41,626 --> 00:53:43,834
-♪ But I can't feel the ground ♪
-Like, hips, shoulders.

1052
00:53:44,459 --> 00:53:48,709
♪ Every time you look at me ♪

1053
00:53:49,293 --> 00:53:51,084
♪ My heart is jumping ♪

1054
00:53:51,168 --> 00:53:52,918
♪ It's easy to see ♪

1055
00:53:53,001 --> 00:53:55,668
♪ You drive me crazy ♪

1056
00:53:55,751 --> 00:53:57,709
♪ I just can't sleep ♪

1057
00:53:58,501 --> 00:54:00,418
♪ I'm so excited ♪

1058
00:54:00,501 --> 00:54:02,209
♪ I'm in too deep ♪

1059
00:54:02,293 --> 00:54:05,043
♪ Whoa, oh, oh, crazy ♪

1060
00:54:05,126 --> 00:54:07,543
♪ But it feels all right ♪

1061
00:54:08,251 --> 00:54:12,001
♪ Baby, thinking of you
Keeps me up all night ♪

1062
00:54:14,459 --> 00:54:15,293
♪ Oh ♪

1063
00:54:16,584 --> 00:54:18,501
♪ Oh, yeah ♪

1064
00:54:19,543 --> 00:54:21,793
♪ You drive me crazy ♪

1065
00:54:21,876 --> 00:54:24,251
-♪ Oh ♪
-Sing it!

1066
00:54:24,334 --> 00:54:27,168
-♪ Oh, crazy ♪
-Yeah!

1067
00:54:27,751 --> 00:54:29,209
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

1068
00:54:29,709 --> 00:54:33,376
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

1069
00:54:33,459 --> 00:54:36,668
-Stop!

1070
00:54:39,126 --> 00:54:43,668
-♪ Ooh, oh, yeah ♪

1071
00:54:44,251 --> 00:54:48,543
♪ You drive me crazy, baby ♪

1072
00:54:48,626 --> 00:54:52,251
♪ Get excited, I'm in too deep ♪

1073
00:54:52,334 --> 00:54:53,793
♪ Oh ♪

1074
00:54:53,876 --> 00:54:58,168
♪ Oh my, it feels all right ♪

1075
00:54:58,251 --> 00:55:02,209
♪ Baby, thinking of you
Keeps me up all night ♪

1076
00:55:03,293 --> 00:55:06,001
All right, guys, we have a show to put on.

1077
00:55:07,834 --> 00:55:09,334
Please don't blow my dad.

1078
00:55:12,418 --> 00:55:15,459
Now, don't worry.
I've spoken with the school nurse,

1079
00:55:15,543 --> 00:55:17,876
and with less than three weeks
until graduation,

1080
00:55:17,959 --> 00:55:22,043
we are prepared
for an epidemic of senioritis.

1081
00:55:24,793 --> 00:55:26,376
Freshmen suck.

1082
00:55:27,168 --> 00:55:31,043
Um, okay. So without further ado,
please join me in welcoming

1083
00:55:31,126 --> 00:55:34,709
the president of the Harding High PTA,
Tiffany Balbo.

1084
00:55:42,376 --> 00:55:43,543
Hi!

1085
00:55:44,126 --> 00:55:45,168
Thank you.

1086
00:55:45,251 --> 00:55:48,001
And I know she's the principal, boo.

1087
00:55:48,084 --> 00:55:49,043
Boo.

1088
00:55:49,126 --> 00:55:52,918
-But give it up for Miss Riser, everyone.

1089
00:55:53,001 --> 00:55:55,043
-Stop it.
-Sorry. Sorry.

1090
00:55:55,126 --> 00:55:59,418
Okay. What a special evening
we get to share with our kids

1091
00:55:59,501 --> 00:56:01,959
before they go off to adulthood.

1092
00:56:02,043 --> 00:56:04,918
Okay, guys,
the energy in this place is sucking wiens.

1093
00:56:05,001 --> 00:56:06,876
We need to get out there
and rock their worlds.

1094
00:56:06,959 --> 00:56:08,001
Oh, and here's this.

1095
00:56:08,084 --> 00:56:09,334
Huh?

1096
00:56:09,418 --> 00:56:11,126
-It's the music for the routine.
-Oh, yes.

1097
00:56:11,209 --> 00:56:14,251
Thank you for the computer tampon.
Shove that where that goes.

1098
00:56:14,334 --> 00:56:16,043
Really, guys, you're the bomb diggity.

1099
00:56:16,126 --> 00:56:17,334
-All of you.
-Aw!

1100
00:56:17,418 --> 00:56:20,209
I love you,
and we're gonna crush the sluts and--

1101
00:56:20,293 --> 00:56:24,126
Oh, it's the big finale, you guys.
It's the big finale!

1102
00:56:24,209 --> 00:56:25,668
I'm so proud of you.

1103
00:56:25,751 --> 00:56:28,043
You pumped to go out there
and change some minds?

1104
00:56:29,084 --> 00:56:31,959
And just remember, this is all I have.

1105
00:56:36,876 --> 00:56:39,876
And real quick,
due to the custom table-scapes,

1106
00:56:39,959 --> 00:56:43,834
the prom ticket prices have gone
from $48 to $93.

1107
00:56:43,918 --> 00:56:46,376
-We take Venmo and PayPal and Zelle.

1108
00:56:46,459 --> 00:56:47,709
Thank you so much!

1109
00:56:51,001 --> 00:56:52,376
Yeah!

1110
00:56:52,459 --> 00:56:54,334
Okay. Thank you, parents.

1111
00:56:54,418 --> 00:56:55,959
Speaking of prom,

1112
00:56:56,043 --> 00:56:59,709
making good choices is at the forefront
of every school function,

1113
00:56:59,793 --> 00:57:03,626
so to help us illustrate that,
please welcome our radical Bulldogettes.

1114
00:57:12,084 --> 00:57:13,751
-Ready?
-Consent!

1115
00:57:13,834 --> 00:57:17,751
♪ C, O, N, S, E, N, T ♪

1116
00:57:17,834 --> 00:57:21,501
♪ I don't touch you
And you don't touch me ♪

1117
00:57:21,584 --> 00:57:23,751
♪ Unless we both fully agree ♪

1118
00:57:23,834 --> 00:57:24,668
♪ Consent ♪

1119
00:57:24,751 --> 00:57:26,543
Yeah!

1120
00:57:27,084 --> 00:57:30,501
Let's go!
Let's hear it for consent!

1121
00:57:32,251 --> 00:57:33,543
♪ Yeah ♪

1122
00:57:33,626 --> 00:57:34,709
♪ Strike it up ♪

1123
00:57:36,043 --> 00:57:37,126
♪ Yeah ♪

1124
00:57:38,293 --> 00:57:40,959
-♪ No, no, no, no ♪
-♪ Yeah ♪

1125
00:57:41,043 --> 00:57:42,209
♪ Strike it up ♪

1126
00:57:42,293 --> 00:57:43,793
♪ No ♪

1127
00:57:44,334 --> 00:57:45,834
♪ No means no ♪

1128
00:57:48,959 --> 00:57:50,751
Are you ready for the remix?

1129
00:57:51,334 --> 00:57:52,376
♪ One ♪

1130
00:57:52,459 --> 00:57:54,584
♪ I can't help I was born like this ♪

1131
00:57:54,668 --> 00:57:56,334
♪ Ain't my fault that you want my drip ♪

1132
00:57:56,418 --> 00:57:58,418
♪ Little bitter bitch
Could have been my friend ♪

1133
00:57:58,501 --> 00:58:00,626
♪ Now you gotta listen
While I pop my shit ♪

1134
00:58:00,709 --> 00:58:02,793
♪ Fast, I'm coming in fast ♪

1135
00:58:02,876 --> 00:58:04,501
♪ First place, you coming in last ♪

1136
00:58:04,584 --> 00:58:06,918
♪ I'm hitting that, hitting that gas ♪

1137
00:58:07,001 --> 00:58:08,834
♪ I'm hitting that, hitting that ♪

1138
00:58:08,918 --> 00:58:10,626
♪ Locomotion ♪

1139
00:58:10,709 --> 00:58:12,793
♪ We causing a commotion ♪

1140
00:58:12,876 --> 00:58:16,918
♪ I put it in, I put it in
I put it in motion ♪

1141
00:58:17,001 --> 00:58:19,418
♪ I put it in, I put it in ♪

1142
00:58:19,501 --> 00:58:21,168
-♪ I put it in motion ♪
-Oh my God.

1143
00:58:21,251 --> 00:58:22,876
♪ My back is aching, my bra too tight ♪

1144
00:58:22,959 --> 00:58:25,293
♪ You mad as hell that I shine so bright ♪

1145
00:58:25,376 --> 00:58:27,209
♪ My back is aching, my bra too tight ♪

1146
00:58:27,293 --> 00:58:29,418
♪ Ass jiggling, I know that's right ♪

1147
00:58:29,501 --> 00:58:33,459
♪ Cah, ah, ah, ah, ah, consent ♪

1148
00:58:35,043 --> 00:58:38,626
-Did they just touch their--
-Just shut up. Shut up.

1149
00:58:38,709 --> 00:58:39,876
Yeah!

1150
00:58:41,001 --> 00:58:44,084
Bulldogs, fuck yeah! Yeah! Whoo!

1151
00:58:44,168 --> 00:58:47,709
-You are a father.
-They brought it back. I am a father.

1152
00:58:48,501 --> 00:58:49,334
Ooh.

1153
00:58:55,209 --> 00:58:57,543
-Damn, Conway!
-Oh!

1154
00:58:58,126 --> 00:59:00,543
-Blaine! Oh my God! Oh my God.
-Whoo!

1155
00:59:00,626 --> 00:59:02,001
Watching you up there.

1156
00:59:02,084 --> 00:59:03,834
-Shut up.
-No, it's true!

1157
00:59:03,918 --> 00:59:05,793
-Shut up! Look at you!
-Yeah?

1158
00:59:05,876 --> 00:59:07,168
Look at you now. You're such a--

1159
00:59:07,251 --> 00:59:09,668
I'm a DILF. I know. Who would've thought?

1160
00:59:09,751 --> 00:59:10,959
-Hmm.
-Hmm.

1161
00:59:11,043 --> 00:59:13,668
Oh, and I wanted to say
I thought it was so cool

1162
00:59:13,751 --> 00:59:16,459
that I was one of the first places
you stopped when you woke up.

1163
00:59:16,543 --> 00:59:19,751
I can't tell you how many times
I've thought of you over the past years.

1164
00:59:19,834 --> 00:59:20,876
-Yeah?
-Yeah.

1165
00:59:22,168 --> 00:59:23,959
Well, even though
I was pretty much brain-dead,

1166
00:59:24,043 --> 00:59:25,918
you were the one
that kept my heart beating.

1167
00:59:26,001 --> 00:59:29,376
Well, listen, I'll just say,
you let me know

1168
00:59:29,459 --> 00:59:32,543
if you ever want to take
another trip down memory Blaine.

1169
00:59:32,626 --> 00:59:34,959
-Yeah, but, Blaine, what about Tiff?
-Eh.

1170
00:59:35,543 --> 00:59:37,209
Didn't stop us the first time.

1171
00:59:38,126 --> 00:59:40,168
What? You said you two were broken up.

1172
00:59:40,251 --> 00:59:42,418
It's, uh… You know, I don't…

1173
00:59:45,126 --> 00:59:46,251
-What?
-I was joking.

1174
00:59:46,334 --> 00:59:49,251
I haven't forgotten
about your whole "no cheating" rule.

1175
00:59:49,334 --> 00:59:52,084
Yeah, which is why we can't be together.

1176
00:59:53,376 --> 00:59:54,209
Yet.

1177
00:59:55,459 --> 00:59:57,334
But if you're the man
that I think you are…

1178
00:59:59,626 --> 01:00:01,501
I'm sure you'll make the right choice.

1179
01:00:01,584 --> 01:00:03,001
Yeah. No, I…

1180
01:00:04,084 --> 01:00:05,001
Oh, sh…

1181
01:00:06,418 --> 01:00:07,376
Hmm.

1182
01:00:14,459 --> 01:00:15,293
Conway.

1183
01:00:17,751 --> 01:00:18,626
♪ Let's go, girls ♪

1184
01:00:22,084 --> 01:00:22,918
♪ Come on ♪

1185
01:00:26,043 --> 01:00:27,876
♪ I'm going out tonight ♪

1186
01:00:27,959 --> 01:00:30,043
♪ I'm feelin' all right ♪

1187
01:00:30,126 --> 01:00:34,043
-♪ Gonna let it all hang out ♪

1188
01:00:34,126 --> 01:00:37,918
♪ Wanna make some noise
Really raise my voice ♪

1189
01:00:38,001 --> 01:00:41,834
♪ Yeah, I wanna scream and shout ♪

1190
01:00:41,918 --> 01:00:44,543
Stephanie,
can you come down here, please?

1191
01:00:45,668 --> 01:00:47,168
♪ No inhibitions ♪

1192
01:00:47,251 --> 01:00:49,543
♪ Make no conditions… ♪

1193
01:00:50,126 --> 01:00:53,543
"Stephanie, we support
Instagram stars like you

1194
01:00:53,626 --> 01:00:56,209
who share Hostess' commitment
to never growing old."

1195
01:00:56,293 --> 01:00:58,084
♪ I only wanna have… ♪

1196
01:00:58,168 --> 01:01:01,543
"Warmest wishes from your friends
at Canada Goose." That is sick!

1197
01:01:02,376 --> 01:01:03,418
"Let's be buds."

1198
01:01:04,126 --> 01:01:06,126
Holy shit.

1199
01:01:06,209 --> 01:01:08,709
♪ Is the prerogative
To have a little fun and ♪

1200
01:01:09,293 --> 01:01:12,418
♪ Oh-oh-oh, go totally crazy ♪

1201
01:01:12,501 --> 01:01:14,918
♪ Forget I'm a lady ♪

1202
01:01:15,001 --> 01:01:17,168
♪ Men's shirts, short skirts ♪

1203
01:01:17,251 --> 01:01:19,376
♪ Oh-oh-oh, really go wild ♪

1204
01:01:19,459 --> 01:01:22,834
♪ Yeah, doin' it in style ♪

1205
01:01:22,918 --> 01:01:25,459
♪ Oh-oh-oh, I wanna be free ♪

1206
01:01:25,543 --> 01:01:29,376
♪ Yeah, to feel the way I feel ♪

1207
01:01:29,876 --> 01:01:32,543
♪ Man, I feel like a woman ♪

1208
01:01:32,626 --> 01:01:35,584
I don't get what the big deal was.
We were just dancing!

1209
01:01:35,668 --> 01:01:39,834
Steph, the big deal is that I told you
that we don't do that anymore,

1210
01:01:39,918 --> 01:01:42,293
and you went
and did it anyway behind my back.

1211
01:01:42,376 --> 01:01:45,043
Are you really mad?
Or is this because Tiff yelled at you?

1212
01:01:45,126 --> 01:01:46,001
Oh, Steph!

1213
01:01:46,084 --> 01:01:48,668
You can't let her bully you,
I've always said that.

1214
01:01:48,751 --> 01:01:50,293
It's not about Tiffany.

1215
01:01:50,376 --> 01:01:51,418
I care about this

1216
01:01:51,501 --> 01:01:54,876
because what you did up there,
it wasn't school-appropriate.

1217
01:01:54,959 --> 01:01:56,043
You fondled yourself

1218
01:01:56,126 --> 01:01:59,209
for an unsuspecting audience
in a routine about consent.

1219
01:01:59,293 --> 01:02:01,459
But I gave myself consent

1220
01:02:02,043 --> 01:02:03,626
to do that to myself.

1221
01:02:03,709 --> 01:02:05,501
Stop stroking your nipples.

1222
01:02:05,584 --> 01:02:07,334
Marth, what is going on here?

1223
01:02:07,418 --> 01:02:09,293
The cheerleaders aren't allowed to dance.

1224
01:02:09,376 --> 01:02:10,876
You took away prom queen.

1225
01:02:10,959 --> 01:02:13,876
You turned the cafeteria
into a Hogwarts without the magic.

1226
01:02:13,959 --> 01:02:15,793
Are you trying
to make this place suck wiens?

1227
01:02:15,876 --> 01:02:20,001
Number one, how dare you?
It is like Hogwarts with the magic.

1228
01:02:20,584 --> 01:02:24,793
And number two,
it doesn't suck wiens. It's nice.

1229
01:02:24,876 --> 01:02:26,834
It's… it's nice here.

1230
01:02:26,918 --> 01:02:29,876
-I had more fun in a coma.
-You did not have more fun in the coma.

1231
01:02:29,959 --> 01:02:32,293
I had more fun going like this.

1232
01:02:34,751 --> 01:02:35,709
Stephanie.

1233
01:02:35,793 --> 01:02:38,376
That was way more fun
than this high school.

1234
01:02:38,459 --> 01:02:43,209
Steph, this may come as a shock to you,
but for most kids, high school sucks.

1235
01:02:43,293 --> 01:02:46,959
I don't know why you're acting
like we didn't have the same experience.

1236
01:02:47,043 --> 01:02:48,626
High school was awesome!

1237
01:02:48,709 --> 01:02:53,168
Freshman year, you bailed on Seth and I
to go be some popular girl.

1238
01:02:53,251 --> 01:02:56,709
No, I didn't bail. I just got more friends

1239
01:02:56,793 --> 01:02:58,959
and a really hot boyfriend.

1240
01:02:59,043 --> 01:03:01,584
Seriously, if you'd had a boyfriend,
you would have understood.

1241
01:03:01,668 --> 01:03:04,918
Stephanie, I wouldn't understand
because I'm gay.

1242
01:03:05,001 --> 01:03:07,334
Ooh, you can't say that word,
unless you're saying it

1243
01:03:07,418 --> 01:03:10,751
in a neutral-positive way
to refer to someone that is…

1244
01:03:13,293 --> 01:03:14,418
Mm-hmm.

1245
01:03:15,751 --> 01:03:16,626
Oh.

1246
01:03:17,709 --> 01:03:18,543
Yeah.

1247
01:03:18,626 --> 01:03:23,251
And it… it made high school
a living hell for me.

1248
01:03:25,043 --> 01:03:26,751
Back then, I felt very alone

1249
01:03:27,751 --> 01:03:32,418
and angry and so threatened

1250
01:03:32,501 --> 01:03:38,126
that if I showed one iota of my real self,
then I would be ripped to shreds

1251
01:03:39,418 --> 01:03:43,084
by Tiffany or Blaine or you.

1252
01:03:43,668 --> 01:03:44,543
Me?

1253
01:03:45,793 --> 01:03:47,918
No way. Why would you even say that?

1254
01:03:48,001 --> 01:03:51,584
Because, Steph,
sometimes I didn't know who you were.

1255
01:03:53,251 --> 01:03:54,876
Or… are.

1256
01:03:56,209 --> 01:03:57,334
Look, let's…

1257
01:03:57,418 --> 01:03:59,626
There's three weeks left
of the school year.

1258
01:03:59,709 --> 01:04:03,043
So let's just get through those
as peacefully as possible,

1259
01:04:03,126 --> 01:04:06,543
and then I can go
to my family's lake house for the summer.

1260
01:04:09,001 --> 01:04:12,959
The periodic table
is made up of 119 elements.

1261
01:04:13,043 --> 01:04:16,709
Oh, hey, space nerds. JK, JK.

1262
01:04:16,793 --> 01:04:20,043
Any of you want to come see Deep Impact
with me and Blaine this weekend?

1263
01:04:20,626 --> 01:04:23,334
As part of my collab
with the Natural History Museum,

1264
01:04:23,418 --> 01:04:28,209
you will get 20% off ticket prices
and complimentary space ice cream.

1265
01:04:28,293 --> 01:04:30,876
So come watch
the end of the world with us.

1266
01:04:30,959 --> 01:04:33,709
Remember it just for me. Please.

1267
01:04:33,793 --> 01:04:36,293
-No one's gonna read you.

1268
01:04:38,293 --> 01:04:40,459
Oh boy,
no one's gonna read you.

1269
01:04:41,209 --> 01:04:42,751
Are you talking to the books?

1270
01:04:43,251 --> 01:04:46,459
-Oh, yeah, I find it helps them grow.
-Still a dork.

1271
01:04:46,543 --> 01:04:48,418
-Huh.
-So…

1272
01:04:48,501 --> 01:04:49,376
Uh,

1273
01:04:50,043 --> 01:04:53,084
do you, like, still wanna see Deep Impact?

1274
01:04:54,834 --> 01:04:56,209
I'm gonna get some popcorn.

1275
01:04:56,293 --> 01:05:00,918
Maybe some freeze-dried space ice cream.
Maybe some Milk Duds, some Whoppers,

1276
01:05:01,001 --> 01:05:04,126
some Juicy Fruit.
I gotta keep this girlish figure.

1277
01:05:04,209 --> 01:05:05,751
You want anything, or…

1278
01:05:05,834 --> 01:05:09,376
Um, oh, no, no, no, don't go just yet.
Just hang here for one second.

1279
01:05:09,459 --> 01:05:10,418
Yeah, sure.

1280
01:05:10,501 --> 01:05:14,834
Oh my God, Seth, you're such a gentleman
going to get the snacks.

1281
01:05:14,918 --> 01:05:17,751
Oh my God, I swear,
you have such a massive dick.

1282
01:05:17,834 --> 01:05:20,876
-What did you say?
-What? Oh, Blaine, Tiffany.

1283
01:05:20,959 --> 01:05:23,001
-Hi!
-Hi! What are you doing here?

1284
01:05:23,084 --> 01:05:24,501
What a coincidence.

1285
01:05:24,584 --> 01:05:27,168
I'm, um, here on a date with Seth.

1286
01:05:27,251 --> 01:05:29,459
He asked me out, and I said,

1287
01:05:29,543 --> 01:05:33,001
"You know what? I am single
and so horny, so yes."

1288
01:05:33,084 --> 01:05:34,918
-Isn't that right?
-Yep.

1289
01:05:35,001 --> 01:05:35,876
Really?

1290
01:05:35,959 --> 01:05:38,251
Wait, I'm sorry.
You are on a date with Sethany?

1291
01:05:38,334 --> 01:05:40,959
-Well, it's just Seth.

1292
01:05:41,043 --> 01:05:44,084
Relax. I'm just joking.

1293
01:05:44,168 --> 01:05:46,709
Well, yeah,
we're just here to see a movie.

1294
01:05:46,793 --> 01:05:49,334
It's not like
we're gonna have hot, consensual sex

1295
01:05:49,418 --> 01:05:50,626
when the lights go down.

1296
01:05:50,709 --> 01:05:53,376
Mm-hmm. Hmm. Hmm?

1297
01:05:53,459 --> 01:05:55,084
Wow! Uh…

1298
01:05:55,168 --> 01:05:58,584
Wow, Seth, it only took 20 years
and some brain damage,

1299
01:05:58,668 --> 01:06:01,418
but she finally agreed
to go out with you. Way to go!

1300
01:06:02,126 --> 01:06:04,293
Again, just joking.

1301
01:06:06,459 --> 01:06:08,209
-Hilarious.
-Let's go find our seats.

1302
01:06:08,293 --> 01:06:10,376
-Huh?
-Let's go find our seats.

1303
01:06:11,584 --> 01:06:14,501
-We gotta go find our seats.
-Down in front, yep.

1304
01:06:14,584 --> 01:06:15,459
Yeah.

1305
01:06:16,168 --> 01:06:18,084
-Oh, yeah.
-"Sethany."

1306
01:06:27,626 --> 01:06:29,251
Feed me some popcorn.

1307
01:06:30,418 --> 01:06:31,793
Are you serious about that?

1308
01:06:32,584 --> 01:06:36,709
Yeah, just be awesome.
Just… just toss some into my mouth.

1309
01:06:36,793 --> 01:06:37,668
All right.

1310
01:06:42,834 --> 01:06:43,834
Seth!

1311
01:06:44,793 --> 01:06:47,876
Oh my God. It's stuck in my throat.
Oh, I'm choking.

1312
01:06:47,959 --> 01:06:50,709
-No, I really… I just got a Milk Dud.
-Did you actually choke on that?

1313
01:06:50,793 --> 01:06:53,001
Yeah, it's stuck right there,
but it's all right.

1314
01:06:53,084 --> 01:06:54,918
I thought that was
a euphemism kind of thing.

1315
01:06:55,001 --> 01:06:56,876
-Fire tether pitons.
-Pitons fired.

1316
01:07:10,709 --> 01:07:12,584
-Stop it.
-What?

1317
01:07:12,668 --> 01:07:15,876
You're eye-fucking Stephanie so hard,
she'll need the morning-after pill.

1318
01:07:15,959 --> 01:07:18,043
I am not eye-fucking anybody.

1319
01:07:18,126 --> 01:07:21,959
It is embarrassing. Do you want me
to call Dr. Wilbin for more therapy?

1320
01:07:22,043 --> 01:07:24,668
-Don't threaten me with a good time.
-Shut up!

1321
01:07:24,751 --> 01:07:27,876
Bitch, turn your ugly face around
and watch the movie.

1322
01:07:27,959 --> 01:07:29,876
Careful how you talk
to senior citizens.

1323
01:07:29,959 --> 01:07:30,959
Shut up, Blaine.

1324
01:07:31,043 --> 01:07:33,668
Ma'am, I'm gonna have
to ask you to be quiet.

1325
01:07:33,751 --> 01:07:34,959
I am not the problem.

1326
01:07:35,043 --> 01:07:37,459
There is a freaking porno
happening over there!

1327
01:07:38,043 --> 01:07:40,084
-What?
-Don't put that on my face.

1328
01:07:40,168 --> 01:07:42,334
It is not my fault.
I am not doing anything.

1329
01:07:42,418 --> 01:07:45,584
Be quiet. I'm trying to watch the movie.

1330
01:07:45,668 --> 01:07:47,543
You're afraid you'll miss something?

1331
01:07:47,626 --> 01:07:49,001
The asteroid hits,

1332
01:07:49,084 --> 01:07:53,168
and Téa Leoni and her Austrian dad
get hit by a ginormous wave.

1333
01:07:53,251 --> 01:07:54,459
-Aw.
-What?

1334
01:07:54,543 --> 01:07:57,418
Oh, come on! We all knew that!

1335
01:07:57,501 --> 01:07:59,126
Can you…

1336
01:07:59,876 --> 01:08:00,876
-Sorry.
-Ma'am?

1337
01:08:00,959 --> 01:08:02,084
I…

1338
01:08:02,168 --> 01:08:04,751
-Ma'am, come with me.
-Okay, fine. Blaine?

1339
01:08:04,834 --> 01:08:06,751
What is the name of your manager?

1340
01:08:07,251 --> 01:08:10,459
Sir? I am going to have
to email your manager.

1341
01:08:16,001 --> 01:08:17,459
-Ah!

1342
01:08:17,543 --> 01:08:20,668
Two decades later, and I still love
watching Tiff lose her mind.

1343
01:08:20,751 --> 01:08:24,459
-I mean, that was incredibly satisfying.
-Mm-hmm.

1344
01:08:24,543 --> 01:08:25,668
Okay, now I understand

1345
01:08:25,751 --> 01:08:28,501
why you devoted so much of your time
on it in high school.

1346
01:08:28,584 --> 01:08:30,876
-Well, not the whole time.
-Oh?

1347
01:08:30,959 --> 01:08:34,209
Just all of my junior,
sophomore, and most of my senior year.

1348
01:08:34,293 --> 01:08:35,168
Mm. Mm-hmm.

1349
01:08:35,751 --> 01:08:38,459
Anyways, Marth told me
something about you in high school.

1350
01:08:38,543 --> 01:08:40,626
Oh God. What?

1351
01:08:41,376 --> 01:08:44,209
She said that you had
a crush on me.

1352
01:08:45,084 --> 01:08:45,918
Yes.

1353
01:08:46,543 --> 01:08:50,251
When we were in high school,
I was very much in love with you.

1354
01:08:50,334 --> 01:08:51,543
Seth!

1355
01:08:51,626 --> 01:08:53,376
-Eh.
-You were? Really?

1356
01:08:53,459 --> 01:08:55,959
-Eh.
-Why didn't you ever say anything?

1357
01:08:56,043 --> 01:08:58,709
'Cause, you know,
we were friends.

1358
01:08:58,793 --> 01:09:00,418
-Yeah.
-And you were with Blaine.

1359
01:09:00,501 --> 01:09:03,418
And, you know, we both know
what your answer would've been.

1360
01:09:03,501 --> 01:09:07,251
Maybe, maybe not.
We're hanging out right now, aren't we?

1361
01:09:07,334 --> 01:09:10,959
Yeah, but that's only because you thought
you could use me to make Blaine jealous.

1362
01:09:11,918 --> 01:09:15,001
Steph, come on. I'm a full-blown adult.

1363
01:09:15,084 --> 01:09:17,918
I think I can recognize
a teenage trick when I see one.

1364
01:09:18,001 --> 01:09:20,834
That's not what's going on.

1365
01:09:20,918 --> 01:09:24,543
Oh, come on, you used to pull this with me
and Marth all the time in high school.

1366
01:09:24,626 --> 01:09:27,668
You'd use our attention
to make the popular kids crave yours.

1367
01:09:27,751 --> 01:09:29,459
Um, did I?

1368
01:09:29,959 --> 01:09:30,793
Yes.

1369
01:09:30,876 --> 01:09:34,251
We always wondered
if those kids ever got to really meet you.

1370
01:09:34,918 --> 01:09:35,876
Like, the real you.

1371
01:09:38,293 --> 01:09:40,918
Well, I did have
a really fun time tonight.

1372
01:09:41,918 --> 01:09:43,251
I'm… I'm sorry.

1373
01:09:43,334 --> 01:09:44,334
No, forget it.

1374
01:09:44,918 --> 01:09:46,334
So should I take you home?

1375
01:09:47,084 --> 01:09:51,084
Or we could continue to hang out.
I have an idea of where we could go.

1376
01:09:54,043 --> 01:09:57,376
Whoa, okay. This place has changed.

1377
01:09:57,959 --> 01:09:59,834
Yeah, I think the lights are just on.

1378
01:10:00,834 --> 01:10:02,043
-Come on.
-Okay.

1379
01:10:04,418 --> 01:10:06,084
Bri, baby, I need favor.

1380
01:10:09,334 --> 01:10:12,459
I want you
to get prom king and queen reinstated.

1381
01:10:13,876 --> 01:10:14,751
What?

1382
01:10:15,793 --> 01:10:16,626
Mom.

1383
01:10:17,168 --> 01:10:18,834
No. No one cares about that.

1384
01:10:18,918 --> 01:10:19,876
I do.

1385
01:10:20,459 --> 01:10:23,793
I want you to beat Steph for prom queen.

1386
01:10:23,876 --> 01:10:26,793
You said it rewards archaic gender roles.

1387
01:10:26,876 --> 01:10:32,793
Well, exactly, which is why
you need to be the woke prom queen.

1388
01:10:33,959 --> 01:10:36,084
I've already got interest
from some brands,

1389
01:10:36,168 --> 01:10:37,751
and they are supes into it.

1390
01:10:37,834 --> 01:10:39,834
Mom. I'm not doing this.

1391
01:10:39,918 --> 01:10:43,209
And don't say "woke" or "supes."

1392
01:10:45,043 --> 01:10:46,584
Just beat Steph for mommy.

1393
01:10:47,334 --> 01:10:48,501
You owe me.

1394
01:10:48,584 --> 01:10:49,793
For what?

1395
01:10:51,501 --> 01:10:52,543
For being alive.

1396
01:10:52,626 --> 01:10:56,584
And if you wanna go on your trip to Nepal,
you will do this for me.

1397
01:11:01,584 --> 01:11:03,418
-Can I ask you something?
-Hmm?

1398
01:11:03,501 --> 01:11:06,209
Does it get exhausting trying to make
everybody like you all the time?

1399
01:11:07,043 --> 01:11:07,918
Well,

1400
01:11:09,251 --> 01:11:11,376
it will be worth it when I win prom queen.

1401
01:11:11,459 --> 01:11:16,459
Well, what I remember about prom
is that it was overhyped,

1402
01:11:17,209 --> 01:11:19,793
you weren't there, and it sucked.

1403
01:11:19,876 --> 01:11:23,084
-That's your memories of prom. That's it?
-Yeah, pretty much.

1404
01:11:23,168 --> 01:11:25,376
Seth! Dude, come on.

1405
01:11:26,251 --> 01:11:29,334
Did you even try to have fun? Did you
even try to tear it up on the dance floor?

1406
01:11:29,418 --> 01:11:32,126
-Just, like, give it the old groove? No!
-Yeah!

1407
01:11:32,209 --> 01:11:35,459
It wouldn't have mattered,
because prom doesn't matter,

1408
01:11:35,543 --> 01:11:37,501
especially not prom queen.

1409
01:11:38,043 --> 01:11:39,126
You maniac.

1410
01:11:39,209 --> 01:11:40,459
Come on, Steph.

1411
01:11:40,543 --> 01:11:44,126
You will yourself out of a coma,
and that's what you care about?

1412
01:11:44,209 --> 01:11:46,709
-It's more than just a crown to me.
-Hmm.

1413
01:11:47,668 --> 01:11:49,668
When I moved here to America,

1414
01:11:50,959 --> 01:11:52,001
it was so hard.

1415
01:11:52,084 --> 01:11:55,501
-Everyone made fun of me, as you remember.
-Yeah.

1416
01:11:55,584 --> 01:11:57,126
And then Mum got sick.

1417
01:11:59,168 --> 01:12:02,418
And I was miserable. I was so miserable.

1418
01:12:04,959 --> 01:12:07,668
And you know what she used to say
to help cheer me up?

1419
01:12:08,501 --> 01:12:13,959
She'd, like, say, "Steph, close your eyes
and imagine your perfect life."

1420
01:12:14,876 --> 01:12:17,501
"And if you can imagine it,
you can have it."

1421
01:12:18,043 --> 01:12:19,918
I was like… …"Shut up, Mom."

1422
01:12:21,209 --> 01:12:22,501
I didn't believe her.

1423
01:12:24,001 --> 01:12:25,168
Then she died.

1424
01:12:28,834 --> 01:12:30,918
Then I was…

1425
01:12:31,418 --> 01:12:34,876
I didn't tell anyone, but I was…
I was more miserable than ever.

1426
01:12:37,793 --> 01:12:41,334
And then one day when we were driving
and I saw Deanna Russo,

1427
01:12:41,418 --> 01:12:45,251
and I was like, "Whoa, she's happy."

1428
01:12:45,876 --> 01:12:47,293
And she was prom queen,

1429
01:12:48,043 --> 01:12:51,501
and I… I need to be her. Okay?

1430
01:12:52,293 --> 01:12:54,376
I wanted to be her so badly.

1431
01:12:55,584 --> 01:12:58,959
And I was getting there,
and then all of a sudden, boom.

1432
01:12:59,959 --> 01:13:02,459
Coma. Lights out.

1433
01:13:04,001 --> 01:13:06,501
And I was bloody miserable again.

1434
01:13:08,126 --> 01:13:09,626
Then I thought, "Well…

1435
01:13:13,334 --> 01:13:16,668
I should see if I can prove my mum right."

1436
01:13:20,918 --> 01:13:26,418
"I should… I should really try
and get that perfect life," you know?

1437
01:13:29,293 --> 01:13:32,334
Okay, definitely not just a crown.
Sorry about that. I'm an asshole.

1438
01:13:32,918 --> 01:13:34,251
No, you're…

1439
01:13:34,334 --> 01:13:36,626
-No, you're not.
-All right.

1440
01:13:36,709 --> 01:13:40,376
-Oh!
-Oh! You did it. You got it!

1441
01:13:40,459 --> 01:13:41,793
Oh my God, okay.

1442
01:13:43,209 --> 01:13:45,751
-Yeah!

1443
01:13:45,834 --> 01:13:46,709
Woot, woot.

1444
01:13:47,293 --> 01:13:49,584
-Oh my God!
-That's all yours. You can have that.

1445
01:13:51,334 --> 01:13:54,626
♪ Now it's time to take my place… ♪

1446
01:13:54,709 --> 01:13:56,168
Do you wanna go to prom with me?

1447
01:13:59,793 --> 01:14:01,626
I promise you, you'll have a good time.

1448
01:14:02,126 --> 01:14:06,834
Well, I already signed up
to be a chaperone, so, yeah, I'll go.

1449
01:14:06,918 --> 01:14:07,751
-Yeah?
-Uh-huh.

1450
01:14:08,334 --> 01:14:09,834
-Awesome!

1451
01:14:10,418 --> 01:14:11,918
-Great.
-Yeah.

1452
01:14:12,001 --> 01:14:13,126
Okay. All right. Wait.

1453
01:14:13,209 --> 01:14:15,168
-Let me try to win you something now.
-Okay. Yeah.

1454
01:14:15,251 --> 01:14:17,376
Attention Harding High seniors,

1455
01:14:17,459 --> 01:14:20,918
a petition
was just delivered to me by Bri Balbo,

1456
01:14:21,584 --> 01:14:22,459
I mean, Luvs,

1457
01:14:22,543 --> 01:14:26,209
um, officially reinstating
a king and queen election

1458
01:14:26,293 --> 01:14:27,501
at this year's prom.

1459
01:14:27,584 --> 01:14:29,543
-What? It's back!
-Prom?

1460
01:14:29,626 --> 01:14:31,043
Oh my God!

1461
01:14:31,126 --> 01:14:31,959
Oh my God!

1462
01:14:32,043 --> 01:14:34,876
-Shut up!
-Oh my God!

1463
01:14:34,959 --> 01:14:37,751
Obviously, I respect
the sacred privacy of student elections.

1464
01:14:37,834 --> 01:14:41,209
-But I'm totally voting for you.
-Absolutely! Later, prom queen!

1465
01:14:41,293 --> 01:14:42,959
-Love you!

1466
01:14:56,418 --> 01:14:57,668
Can you believe it?

1467
01:14:58,668 --> 01:15:00,418
You might make history after all.

1468
01:15:01,001 --> 01:15:05,334
The first person
to ever lose prom queen twice.

1469
01:15:06,834 --> 01:15:09,251
Don't go chasing waterfalls, Steph.

1470
01:15:09,751 --> 01:15:11,376
-Skank face.
-What was that?

1471
01:15:12,751 --> 01:15:13,876
Oh, nothing.

1472
01:15:15,084 --> 01:15:16,251
Slut bag.

1473
01:15:16,751 --> 01:15:18,209
What did you just call me?

1474
01:15:18,751 --> 01:15:20,334
-Nothing.
-Possum pussy.

1475
01:15:20,418 --> 01:15:22,084
-Rumpel-slut-skin.
-Jizz collector.

1476
01:15:22,168 --> 01:15:23,334
You're a sad wife.

1477
01:15:23,418 --> 01:15:24,584
What did you say?

1478
01:15:26,168 --> 01:15:28,293
I didn't say shit, but you heard me.

1479
01:15:40,459 --> 01:15:41,959
Oh my God.

1480
01:15:42,501 --> 01:15:44,709
It's an invite to a prom party at Bri's.

1481
01:15:44,793 --> 01:15:46,584
-An invite?
-Check your phone!

1482
01:15:47,584 --> 01:15:49,793
Oh my God! I got invited!

1483
01:15:49,876 --> 01:15:51,668
-Can you believe that?
-We got invited!

1484
01:15:51,751 --> 01:15:53,459
-Steve Aoki is DJing.
-Right?

1485
01:15:53,543 --> 01:15:55,293
Steve Aoki? I love it!

1486
01:15:55,376 --> 01:15:56,709
Oh my God!

1487
01:16:00,168 --> 01:16:04,293
Steph. Steph, we're not gonna go probably
'cause, I mean, it's a $50 cover.

1488
01:16:04,376 --> 01:16:06,293
-Oh, yeah.
-That's so expensive.

1489
01:16:06,376 --> 01:16:07,376
I can't afford that.

1490
01:16:07,459 --> 01:16:10,709
Why didn't you tell me we were hosting it?
I'd have got that aphrodisiac wine.

1491
01:16:10,793 --> 01:16:12,209
I didn't know.

1492
01:16:41,168 --> 01:16:42,001
Hi, guys.

1493
01:16:42,084 --> 01:16:43,626
I am so pumped to announce

1494
01:16:43,709 --> 01:16:46,876
that I will be hosting the biggest
and the best prom after-party

1495
01:16:46,959 --> 01:16:48,584
at a supersecret locaish.

1496
01:16:49,084 --> 01:16:51,293
It's free to get in, unlike Bri's.

1497
01:16:52,209 --> 01:16:54,043
It's gonna be awesome.

1498
01:16:54,126 --> 01:16:57,709
So, DM me a picture of your ballot
voting me as prom queen,

1499
01:16:57,793 --> 01:16:59,751
and you'll get all the deets night of.

1500
01:17:04,709 --> 01:17:06,293
This is weird for me too, sir.

1501
01:17:17,918 --> 01:17:18,918
Stephie!

1502
01:17:19,418 --> 01:17:21,251
Wanna hurry it up?

1503
01:17:25,876 --> 01:17:26,918
You want a beer?

1504
01:17:28,126 --> 01:17:30,626
Oh, uh, sure.

1505
01:17:30,709 --> 01:17:33,168
Wrong answer, hot rod.

1506
01:17:33,251 --> 01:17:35,543
You think I'll let you drink
and drive with my daughter?

1507
01:17:36,293 --> 01:17:38,751
Oh, well, I'm actually not driving.
We're taking a Lyft.

1508
01:17:38,834 --> 01:17:40,418
Oh, cool.

1509
01:17:41,459 --> 01:17:44,959
Though I suspect Stephanie would prefer
not to spend her prom evening

1510
01:17:45,043 --> 01:17:46,293
with a drunken fool.

1511
01:17:46,376 --> 01:17:47,709
It would just be the o--

1512
01:17:47,793 --> 01:17:50,793
No, I think I'm okay, actually.
I'll maybe have a water, if anything.

1513
01:17:50,876 --> 01:17:52,793
-Did you bring some condoms?

1514
01:17:54,418 --> 01:17:56,126
Um, no.

1515
01:17:56,209 --> 01:18:00,126
Hm. Didn't think we needed
to have this talk, but, uh, Seth,

1516
01:18:00,209 --> 01:18:04,251
you are aware that unprotected sex
can lead to geriatric pregnancies?

1517
01:18:04,334 --> 01:18:06,334
-Stephie!
-You ready to be an old dad?

1518
01:18:06,418 --> 01:18:08,793
I'm sorry, do you want me
to sleep with your daughter?

1519
01:18:08,876 --> 01:18:10,376
-Or--
-What did you just ask me?

1520
01:18:10,459 --> 01:18:12,376
-It's--
-Okay, I'm ready!

1521
01:18:24,376 --> 01:18:26,334
Mom chose great.

1522
01:18:26,918 --> 01:18:28,126
Yeah.

1523
01:18:29,584 --> 01:18:31,918
-Going to prom.

1524
01:18:32,001 --> 01:18:34,418
-Oh my God. Dad, stop it.
-Don't.

1525
01:18:34,501 --> 01:18:38,126
Dad, stop it. You're embarrassing me.

1526
01:18:38,209 --> 01:18:39,751
A bit higher on the angle.

1527
01:18:39,834 --> 01:18:42,418
Dad, you're taking so many,
but take more, take more.

1528
01:18:43,084 --> 01:18:44,459
-Boy band.
-♪ Cover girl ♪

1529
01:18:44,543 --> 01:18:45,793
Okay, Dad, that's enough.

1530
01:18:45,876 --> 01:18:46,959
-Maybe just some of me?
-Oh.

1531
01:18:48,168 --> 01:18:50,001
♪ On the runway ♪

1532
01:18:50,084 --> 01:18:51,376
-♪ Work ♪
-♪ Supermodel ♪

1533
01:18:51,459 --> 01:18:54,001
-♪ You better work it, girl ♪
-♪ Of the world ♪

1534
01:18:54,084 --> 01:18:57,459
♪ Wet your lips
And make love to the camera ♪

1535
01:18:57,543 --> 01:18:59,334
-♪ Work ♪
-♪ Turn to the left ♪

1536
01:18:59,418 --> 01:19:01,626
-♪ Work ♪
-♪ Now turn to the right ♪

1537
01:19:01,709 --> 01:19:02,876
♪ Work ♪

1538
01:19:02,959 --> 01:19:03,876
♪ Sashay ♪

1539
01:19:03,959 --> 01:19:06,334
This is such a perfect night.

1540
01:19:06,418 --> 01:19:07,918
-Yeah.
-That filthy ho.

1541
01:19:08,001 --> 01:19:11,668
-She's rigging the election.
-She's an adult. She won't stoop that low.

1542
01:19:13,376 --> 01:19:14,209
Wait.

1543
01:19:16,084 --> 01:19:17,834
Hey, Tiffany.

1544
01:19:17,918 --> 01:19:19,751
-Oh my gosh.
-Hey, Steph!

1545
01:19:19,834 --> 01:19:21,043
I'm surprised you're here.

1546
01:19:21,126 --> 01:19:24,918
Aren't you normally on a Saturday night
just home sharpening your teeth?

1547
01:19:25,793 --> 01:19:27,626
You know, I just want to say

1548
01:19:27,709 --> 01:19:31,626
the noble thing would be to do
what the rest of these students are doing

1549
01:19:31,709 --> 01:19:33,751
and vote for Bri.

1550
01:19:33,834 --> 01:19:35,126
Oh.

1551
01:19:35,209 --> 01:19:36,668
-Is that right?
-Mm-hmm.

1552
01:19:36,751 --> 01:19:40,251
Well, I always do the noble thing.

1553
01:19:40,959 --> 01:19:43,959
Vote for Bri.
Is it spelled like the cheese?

1554
01:19:45,043 --> 01:19:46,293
B, R, I.

1555
01:19:46,376 --> 01:19:47,209
Hmm.

1556
01:19:48,293 --> 01:19:49,251
Interesting.

1557
01:19:50,751 --> 01:19:51,584
Ooh.

1558
01:19:51,668 --> 01:19:52,918
Yep. Right in there.

1559
01:19:53,001 --> 01:19:54,001
There.

1560
01:19:56,209 --> 01:19:57,918
I'm just so confident.

1561
01:20:01,376 --> 01:20:03,876
-Just vote for me.
-Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

1562
01:20:03,959 --> 01:20:05,501
Sethany.

1563
01:20:06,834 --> 01:20:09,251
You know you're not eligible
for prom queen, right?

1564
01:20:09,334 --> 01:20:12,543
That's right, I'm not.
I'm not eligible for prom queen.

1565
01:20:12,626 --> 01:20:15,334
And it's probably killing you
that you aren't either.

1566
01:20:16,459 --> 01:20:17,668
Relax, Tiff.

1567
01:20:18,168 --> 01:20:19,418
I'm just joking.

1568
01:20:21,043 --> 01:20:23,834
-That's funny.
-It's funny. It was a joke. Yeah.

1569
01:20:23,918 --> 01:20:25,793
-It was a joke.

1570
01:20:26,418 --> 01:20:27,668
She's going down.

1571
01:20:29,084 --> 01:20:30,834
Bye.

1572
01:20:30,918 --> 01:20:33,459
-♪ Make your body rock ♪

1573
01:20:33,543 --> 01:20:34,668
♪ Don't you make it stop ♪

1574
01:20:35,251 --> 01:20:38,376
♪ Baby, dance your dance around me ♪

1575
01:20:38,459 --> 01:20:40,084
♪ I want you all for me… ♪

1576
01:20:40,168 --> 01:20:43,334
-Oh my God, it's beautiful.
-Mm-hmm.

1577
01:20:43,418 --> 01:20:45,209
Oh my God, Steph! There you are!

1578
01:20:45,293 --> 01:20:49,876
-Oh, you guys look incredible. Amazing!
-Thanks. Wanna go crush the photo booth?

1579
01:20:49,959 --> 01:20:52,209
Oh my God, stop.
You're causing climate change.

1580
01:20:52,293 --> 01:20:56,001
Um, I've got to go and get some votes.
I don't know whether you guys saw,

1581
01:20:56,084 --> 01:20:59,168
but Bri's mom is, like, totally trying
to rig the election.

1582
01:20:59,251 --> 01:21:01,209
Oh! Oh, hell, no!

1583
01:21:01,293 --> 01:21:03,376
I will not stand for voter suppression.

1584
01:21:03,459 --> 01:21:06,334
-We're gonna go help spread the word.
-Storm the cafeteria.

1585
01:21:06,418 --> 01:21:07,418
-Bye.
-See you later?

1586
01:21:07,501 --> 01:21:09,334
Everyone feeling included? Okay.

1587
01:21:09,418 --> 01:21:11,876
There's enough room
on the dance floor for everybody,

1588
01:21:11,959 --> 01:21:16,043
and you don't need a partner to dance.
I usually dance by myself. It's fun.

1589
01:21:22,084 --> 01:21:26,793
Baby, look at me. You know, this is
the dress I won prom queen in. Still fits.

1590
01:21:26,876 --> 01:21:28,918
I almost wore that exact same dress,

1591
01:21:29,001 --> 01:21:31,001
but I'm glad I didn't
because you look phenomenal.

1592
01:21:31,084 --> 01:21:32,709
-Aw.
-What are you doing?

1593
01:21:32,793 --> 01:21:36,834
I am fulfilling my duties
as the president of the PTA,

1594
01:21:36,918 --> 01:21:39,084
overlooking the ballot boxes,

1595
01:21:39,168 --> 01:21:43,751
and something tells me
that you got this in the bag.

1596
01:21:43,834 --> 01:21:44,793
Wink.

1597
01:21:45,584 --> 01:21:49,043
I mean, you can't be
a woke prom queen if you lose.

1598
01:21:49,126 --> 01:21:51,584
Which reminds me, here is a list of brands

1599
01:21:51,668 --> 01:21:54,751
I'd love for you to casually drop
during your acceptance speech.

1600
01:21:54,834 --> 01:21:57,459
Each one could be an additional 10K.

1601
01:21:57,543 --> 01:22:01,084
Don't worry if you can't work in Pep Boys.
It's not really our thing.

1602
01:22:01,168 --> 01:22:05,376
Please just try and remember
this is my prom, not yours.

1603
01:22:12,918 --> 01:22:14,543
-Hey, fam.

1604
01:22:14,626 --> 01:22:19,001
Um, guys, just letting you know
that prom queen voting is still open,

1605
01:22:19,084 --> 01:22:20,501
and I think that something--

1606
01:22:20,584 --> 01:22:21,918
Damn, Conway, you look…

1607
01:22:22,001 --> 01:22:24,459
-…banging.

1608
01:22:25,418 --> 01:22:27,668
Oh my God, you're here. I mean, um…

1609
01:22:29,418 --> 01:22:30,251
You came.

1610
01:22:30,334 --> 01:22:34,709
Of course, I came. I've been waiting
20 years to see you in this dress.

1611
01:22:36,584 --> 01:22:38,209
My God, you look beautiful.

1612
01:22:39,043 --> 01:22:41,751
What is this? You mind if I slip this off?

1613
01:22:41,834 --> 01:22:43,626
-Um--
-You really don't need it.

1614
01:22:44,376 --> 01:22:46,668
I still have a naughty thing
for prom queens, right?

1615
01:22:46,751 --> 01:22:50,459
Well, If I don't get enough votes,
you might be fucking your daughter.

1616
01:22:50,543 --> 01:22:51,626
Huh?

1617
01:22:51,709 --> 01:22:55,418
-No, I wouldn't do that, but…
-No. Obviously. Sorry. Yeah.

1618
01:22:55,501 --> 01:22:56,709
Look at us. We are…

1619
01:22:57,918 --> 01:23:00,709
We're meant to be together.
We're perfect together. Admit it.

1620
01:23:01,418 --> 01:23:02,876
We're made for one another.

1621
01:23:03,418 --> 01:23:04,334
-Blaine?
-Yeah.

1622
01:23:04,418 --> 01:23:06,334
I don't think this is right.
This is a mistake.

1623
01:23:06,418 --> 01:23:08,793
No, no. The mistake was me
asking Tiff to prom. Trust me.

1624
01:23:08,876 --> 01:23:10,709
Wait. No, Blaine. Seriously.

1625
01:23:15,626 --> 01:23:16,626
Seth.

1626
01:23:16,709 --> 01:23:17,584
Seth?

1627
01:23:19,543 --> 01:23:22,459
Hey, Seth. Seth, hey!
I know what that looked like,

1628
01:23:22,543 --> 01:23:24,543
but I promise you,
it's not what you think.

1629
01:23:26,834 --> 01:23:28,584
You teenage-tricked me, Steph.

1630
01:23:29,334 --> 01:23:33,209
And you know what?
It's my fault for believing you changed.

1631
01:23:35,418 --> 01:23:39,918
Okay, class of 2022,
it's the big moment!

1632
01:23:40,001 --> 01:23:44,209
Okay, so the reason that we're all here
and the only reason we all came tonight…

1633
01:23:44,293 --> 01:23:46,209
-No.
-…is because-- No, it is.

1634
01:23:46,293 --> 01:23:51,751
…is because I have the results
of our prom elections.

1635
01:23:55,168 --> 01:23:59,293
By a unanimous vote, our 2022 prom king is

1636
01:24:00,209 --> 01:24:01,626
Lance Harrison.

1637
01:24:11,334 --> 01:24:13,293
Oh my God!

1638
01:24:13,959 --> 01:24:18,126
And the winner of prom queen
received over 1,000 votes

1639
01:24:18,209 --> 01:24:21,626
despite there only being 327 of you.

1640
01:24:21,709 --> 01:24:23,751
However, she has just informed us

1641
01:24:23,834 --> 01:24:26,584
that she has withdrawn
from the competition.

1642
01:24:26,668 --> 01:24:27,668
What?

1643
01:24:29,043 --> 01:24:31,584
-Okay, so…
-Bri.

1644
01:24:31,668 --> 01:24:34,543
…the 2022 prom queen will go to…

1645
01:24:37,501 --> 01:24:38,959
Stephanie Conway.

1646
01:24:48,501 --> 01:24:50,418
There's been a mistake. No, no, no.

1647
01:24:52,126 --> 01:24:54,584
-Go, Steph! I can't believe it!

1648
01:24:55,668 --> 01:24:56,501
God!

1649
01:24:56,584 --> 01:25:01,584
Stephanie!
Stephanie! Stephanie! Stephanie!

1650
01:25:01,668 --> 01:25:03,084
Stephanie!

1651
01:25:03,168 --> 01:25:04,459
Stephanie!

1652
01:25:04,543 --> 01:25:05,543
No! No!

1653
01:25:05,626 --> 01:25:08,834
Stephanie!
Stephanie! Stephanie! Stephanie!

1654
01:25:21,459 --> 01:25:25,876
Now it is time for our king and queen
to take their dance.

1655
01:25:32,501 --> 01:25:35,793
-Oh my God!
-♪ The whispers in the morning ♪

1656
01:25:39,376 --> 01:25:43,084
♪ Of lovers sleeping tight ♪

1657
01:25:46,168 --> 01:25:51,334
♪ Are rolling by like thunder now ♪

1658
01:25:53,251 --> 01:25:57,459
♪ As I look in your eyes ♪

1659
01:26:00,418 --> 01:26:04,459
♪ I hold on to your body ♪

1660
01:26:07,501 --> 01:26:11,834
♪ And feel each move you make ♪

1661
01:26:14,043 --> 01:26:17,834
♪ Your voice is warm and tender ♪

1662
01:26:18,543 --> 01:26:21,459
♪ A love that I could ♪

1663
01:26:22,376 --> 01:26:27,251
♪ Not forsake ♪

1664
01:26:27,918 --> 01:26:32,584
-♪ 'Cause I am your lady ♪

1665
01:26:32,668 --> 01:26:34,626
-Oh my God!
-What?

1666
01:26:35,751 --> 01:26:39,168
♪ And you are my man ♪

1667
01:26:40,209 --> 01:26:41,293
Stop.

1668
01:26:42,001 --> 01:26:46,959
♪ Whenever you reach for me ♪

1669
01:26:49,126 --> 01:26:54,709
♪ I'll do all that I can ♪

1670
01:26:56,251 --> 01:27:00,584
♪ Even though there may be times ♪

1671
01:27:03,459 --> 01:27:07,584
♪ It seems I'm far away ♪

1672
01:27:10,251 --> 01:27:13,751
♪ But never wonder where I am ♪

1673
01:27:14,834 --> 01:27:19,918
♪ 'Cause I am always by your… ♪

1674
01:27:20,001 --> 01:27:23,626
After-party at Bri's house
with live music.

1675
01:27:23,709 --> 01:27:28,168
And spoiler alert, party favors
are Beats by Dre headphones!

1676
01:27:28,959 --> 01:27:30,876
Bri, will you tell them?

1677
01:27:30,959 --> 01:27:34,793
Hey, everyone, after-party
is at Steph's place. See you there.

1678
01:27:34,876 --> 01:27:37,834
Wait, what are you doing?
The house is ready for the party.

1679
01:27:37,918 --> 01:27:41,543
I mean, Steve Aoki is in our living room.
What am I going to tell him?

1680
01:27:41,626 --> 01:27:44,293
I don't know.
Tell him you lost prom queen.

1681
01:27:47,376 --> 01:27:48,751
Shit. Shit.

1682
01:27:58,251 --> 01:28:01,293
Drink! Drink!
Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink!

1683
01:28:01,376 --> 01:28:02,584
No!

1684
01:28:06,876 --> 01:28:10,668
Yes, hi. I'd like to report
a rowdy high school party

1685
01:28:10,751 --> 01:28:13,043
with tons of underage drinking.

1686
01:28:13,626 --> 01:28:15,043
And-- Oh my God!

1687
01:28:15,793 --> 01:28:18,376
I think an adult is hosting it.

1688
01:28:27,334 --> 01:28:28,168
Yeah!

1689
01:28:28,668 --> 01:28:29,834
Hey!

1690
01:28:29,918 --> 01:28:30,793
Hey, Janet!

1691
01:28:31,376 --> 01:28:32,251
Come on!

1692
01:28:32,334 --> 01:28:34,168
-No, don't film me!
-Why?

1693
01:28:34,251 --> 01:28:36,543
The media will use it
to try and discredit me.

1694
01:28:39,876 --> 01:28:40,709
Wait, no.

1695
01:28:40,793 --> 01:28:43,334
-Fuck it! Fuck it! Film me! Film me!
-Okay. Okay.

1696
01:28:43,418 --> 01:28:47,251
Yeah, come on, yeah.
That's right. It's the president, bitch!

1697
01:28:47,334 --> 01:28:49,251
-Yeah!
-Suck my vulva!

1698
01:28:56,043 --> 01:28:58,209
Oh my God, whose tooth is this?

1699
01:28:58,293 --> 01:28:59,584
-Oh shit.

1700
01:28:59,668 --> 01:29:01,168
Cops!

1701
01:29:02,793 --> 01:29:05,668
-Where? Wait. Okay, wait--
-Bye, Stephanie.

1702
01:29:05,751 --> 01:29:07,334
No. Oh my God.

1703
01:29:23,918 --> 01:29:27,084
Oh my God, Martha,
I was just about to call you.

1704
01:29:27,168 --> 01:29:31,209
Steph, what in ever living fuck
were you thinking?

1705
01:29:32,334 --> 01:29:36,126
-You said I could use the house.
-Are you kidding? Twenty years ago.

1706
01:29:36,209 --> 01:29:39,209
And even then,
I didn't want you to use it.

1707
01:29:39,293 --> 01:29:42,084
-Did you even think about me?

1708
01:29:42,168 --> 01:29:44,709
This is all kinds of illegal.

1709
01:29:44,793 --> 01:29:47,376
Oh my God, they're gonna make
a Netflix documentary about me.

1710
01:29:47,459 --> 01:29:50,834
Well, wait. Okay, think about that.
That could be really cool.

1711
01:29:50,918 --> 01:29:52,834
That… that could be epic.

1712
01:29:52,918 --> 01:29:54,959
Look how well it turned out
for Tiger King.

1713
01:29:55,043 --> 01:29:56,084
No.

1714
01:29:56,168 --> 01:30:00,209
No, it's not epic or cool.

1715
01:30:00,293 --> 01:30:02,459
God, you're the same as in high school.

1716
01:30:03,043 --> 01:30:05,751
-So you don't want a drink?
-No, I don't want a drink!

1717
01:30:06,668 --> 01:30:08,376
You need to grow up!

1718
01:30:08,959 --> 01:30:10,293
You're not a teenager!

1719
01:30:10,376 --> 01:30:13,876
I know I'm not. I'm an adult.
Is that what you want to hear?

1720
01:30:14,376 --> 01:30:18,043
Yes, I am a 37-year-old 12th grader.

1721
01:30:21,043 --> 01:30:25,584
You don't think I know how crazy it is
going back to high school in this body?

1722
01:30:26,334 --> 01:30:29,126
What else was I supposed to do?

1723
01:30:29,209 --> 01:30:32,418
-What else did I have?
-You had me, and you had Seth.

1724
01:30:33,001 --> 01:30:35,751
Everybody else just got to go on
and live their lives.

1725
01:30:35,834 --> 01:30:37,626
I'm supposed to just jump forward?

1726
01:30:37,709 --> 01:30:40,793
I'm just not allowed
to ever make mistakes?

1727
01:30:40,876 --> 01:30:43,209
Making mistakes is different

1728
01:30:43,293 --> 01:30:46,168
than willfully screwing over
the people who care about you.

1729
01:30:47,251 --> 01:30:48,751
You pushed us away.

1730
01:30:49,668 --> 01:30:52,751
They were not your friends.
We were your friends.

1731
01:30:53,376 --> 01:30:55,293
We were the ones who cared about you.

1732
01:30:55,376 --> 01:30:57,501
We were the ones
who showed up at the hospital.

1733
01:30:57,584 --> 01:30:59,418
They never came to the hospital.
None of them.

1734
01:30:59,501 --> 01:31:01,584
I can't believe you would say that.

1735
01:31:02,376 --> 01:31:04,334
I got tons of birthday cards.

1736
01:31:04,418 --> 01:31:06,334
Did you even look
to see who they were from?

1737
01:31:11,626 --> 01:31:13,793
Help. Oh God.

1738
01:31:14,418 --> 01:31:15,501
Was that curry?

1739
01:31:15,584 --> 01:31:17,751
I'm done. You can find your own way home.

1740
01:31:23,001 --> 01:31:24,209
Hey, Seth.

1741
01:31:32,459 --> 01:31:33,626
Finally.

1742
01:31:33,709 --> 01:31:35,709
I saw you followed Stephanie on Insta.

1743
01:31:35,793 --> 01:31:39,209
Don't you wanna know if I got arrested
at that party you called the cops on?

1744
01:31:39,293 --> 01:31:40,209
I know it was you.

1745
01:31:40,293 --> 01:31:44,043
Do you think I do this stuff for fun?
I'm looking out for you.

1746
01:31:44,126 --> 01:31:46,168
We could have made
a hundred grand tonight.

1747
01:31:46,251 --> 01:31:49,251
We could've used that money
as a donation to get you into college.

1748
01:31:49,334 --> 01:31:51,751
So you could blog
about being an Ivy League mom?

1749
01:31:51,834 --> 01:31:54,126
Oh well, I guess
I'll have to get in myself.

1750
01:31:54,209 --> 01:31:57,543
I want you to have the perfect life,

1751
01:31:58,126 --> 01:31:58,959
like me.

1752
01:31:59,543 --> 01:32:02,751
The perfect life online means nothing
when you're miserable in real life.

1753
01:32:02,834 --> 01:32:05,209
We are not miserable.

1754
01:32:05,293 --> 01:32:06,168
Yeah, we are.

1755
01:32:07,293 --> 01:32:09,626
And you're right, Mom.

1756
01:32:09,709 --> 01:32:12,459
No elite person
follows more than 100 people.

1757
01:32:13,084 --> 01:32:14,709
So you gotta go.

1758
01:32:14,793 --> 01:32:17,376
-You are toast.

1759
01:32:17,459 --> 01:32:18,918
Hey, your family's fucked up.

1760
01:32:19,001 --> 01:32:21,376
Are we doing this?
I got another gig in an hour.

1761
01:32:21,459 --> 01:32:23,834
You know what? Fuck you, Steve Aoki.

1762
01:32:23,918 --> 01:32:26,918
-♪ Life is a second ♪

1763
01:32:27,001 --> 01:32:29,668
♪ Gone in an instant ♪

1764
01:32:29,751 --> 01:32:32,459
♪ Defined by a moment… ♪

1765
01:32:32,543 --> 01:32:34,918
No offense,
but you look like a prom queen.

1766
01:32:38,251 --> 01:32:40,834
Holy shit, Deanna Russo?

1767
01:32:41,876 --> 01:32:44,084
Yeah. Do we know each other?

1768
01:32:44,584 --> 01:32:47,751
Oh my God. No. I… I mean…
Well, I know who you are.

1769
01:32:47,834 --> 01:32:49,584
You're a legend at Harding High.

1770
01:32:49,668 --> 01:32:51,793
You won prom queen and had a perfect life.

1771
01:32:51,876 --> 01:32:53,543
Perfect life?

1772
01:32:54,293 --> 01:32:57,251
Yeah. Uh, let's see, um…

1773
01:32:57,334 --> 01:33:01,543
I was divorced before I was 30
when my husband left me

1774
01:33:01,626 --> 01:33:05,709
for a 21-year-old barista
with two more abs than I had.

1775
01:33:05,793 --> 01:33:10,584
And I was left with no credit
and no job prospects.

1776
01:33:11,459 --> 01:33:14,543
My advice, throw that crown away now.

1777
01:33:15,126 --> 01:33:16,709
You know what prom queen got me?

1778
01:33:16,793 --> 01:33:18,459
An even spray tan

1779
01:33:18,543 --> 01:33:22,418
and the ability to dodge bleach poisoning
every time I get my hair done.

1780
01:33:22,501 --> 01:33:24,293
Well, I mean, that is a skill.

1781
01:33:25,584 --> 01:33:26,459
Yeah.

1782
01:33:27,126 --> 01:33:33,709
But, uh, imagine all the other skills
I would have had if I'd gone to college.

1783
01:33:33,793 --> 01:33:35,543
I don't know where I would be,

1784
01:33:36,084 --> 01:33:39,251
but I do know it wouldn't be
taking courses at the community college

1785
01:33:39,334 --> 01:33:42,418
while hustling
to make rent between two jobs.

1786
01:33:42,501 --> 01:33:46,501
The only thing I look forward to
is taking my pants off at night.

1787
01:33:46,584 --> 01:33:48,293
Oh my God. I do that too now.

1788
01:33:48,376 --> 01:33:50,751
-It's so good, right?
-Yeah. Just like…

1789
01:33:50,834 --> 01:33:53,418
-Yeah.

1790
01:33:53,501 --> 01:33:57,626
But it's all worth it
'cause I am going to get a degree,

1791
01:33:57,709 --> 01:34:02,209
and I am going to have a career,
and that is everything.

1792
01:34:02,793 --> 01:34:06,751
And for the first time in my life,
I'm excited about the future

1793
01:34:07,334 --> 01:34:09,459
instead of holding on to the past.

1794
01:34:14,126 --> 01:34:18,834
♪ I should know who I am by now ♪

1795
01:34:19,876 --> 01:34:22,168
♪ I walk ♪

1796
01:34:22,251 --> 01:34:25,293
♪ The record stands somehow ♪

1797
01:34:25,376 --> 01:34:27,459
♪ Thinking of winter ♪

1798
01:34:30,709 --> 01:34:34,293
♪ Your name is the splinter inside me ♪

1799
01:34:35,168 --> 01:34:38,709
♪ While I wait… ♪

1800
01:34:38,793 --> 01:34:42,709
Please welcome
our award-winning Harding Bulldogettes!

1801
01:34:42,793 --> 01:34:47,751
-♪ And I remember the sound ♪

1802
01:34:48,501 --> 01:34:51,251
♪ Of your November downtown ♪

1803
01:34:53,709 --> 01:34:57,543
♪ And I remember the truth ♪

1804
01:34:59,459 --> 01:35:01,918
♪ A warm December with you ♪

1805
01:35:03,293 --> 01:35:07,751
♪ But I don't have to make this mistake ♪

1806
01:35:09,168 --> 01:35:13,584
♪ And I don't have to stay this way ♪

1807
01:35:14,459 --> 01:35:16,959
♪ If only I would wake ♪

1808
01:35:22,793 --> 01:35:24,543
Oh. There you are.

1809
01:35:25,793 --> 01:35:27,043
Is everything okay?

1810
01:35:28,293 --> 01:35:29,251
Want something to eat?

1811
01:35:30,334 --> 01:35:31,334
I'm not hungry.

1812
01:35:31,418 --> 01:35:34,168
Oh, come on. Sit down with me.
Have breakfast with your old dad.

1813
01:35:39,751 --> 01:35:42,668
Do you know
where you're sitting at graduation yet?

1814
01:35:43,876 --> 01:35:44,751
On my butt?

1815
01:35:47,459 --> 01:35:49,501
I just wanna get a good seat
so I can see you.

1816
01:35:51,918 --> 01:35:53,751
I'm not gonna go to graduation, Dad.

1817
01:35:53,834 --> 01:35:55,501
Seth and Martha won't talk to me,

1818
01:35:55,584 --> 01:35:57,834
and I don't think
anybody else wants me there.

1819
01:35:57,918 --> 01:35:59,251
Well, I want you there.

1820
01:35:59,834 --> 01:36:00,876
That doesn't count.

1821
01:36:01,459 --> 01:36:02,376
Yes, it does.

1822
01:36:04,001 --> 01:36:05,126
I count.

1823
01:36:06,084 --> 01:36:10,126
I know you used to roll your eyes
whenever Mom would compliment you,

1824
01:36:11,043 --> 01:36:14,084
tell you how amazing,
beautiful, wonderful you were,

1825
01:36:14,668 --> 01:36:16,793
like she had to say it 'cause she was Mom,

1826
01:36:18,334 --> 01:36:19,793
but she wanted to

1827
01:36:20,459 --> 01:36:22,709
because she believed it, deeply.

1828
01:36:25,126 --> 01:36:28,084
One of the last things
she said to me was to make sure

1829
01:36:28,876 --> 01:36:31,334
that you knew how to receive love.

1830
01:36:32,126 --> 01:36:35,959
And I spent every day of your coma
wondering if I messed up,

1831
01:36:36,043 --> 01:36:39,293
so… let me be clear.

1832
01:36:41,251 --> 01:36:45,209
Don't waste your time
telling the people who love you the most

1833
01:36:45,293 --> 01:36:46,709
that they don't count.

1834
01:36:47,668 --> 01:36:50,168
They are the only ones that count.

1835
01:36:53,251 --> 01:36:54,293
Thanks, Dad.

1836
01:36:55,626 --> 01:36:56,501
Yeah.

1837
01:37:01,876 --> 01:37:05,293
{\an8}Okay, I know I have
some things to clear up, so…

1838
01:37:07,084 --> 01:37:09,168
{\an8}I thought this is gonna be the best way.

1839
01:37:09,251 --> 01:37:13,001
Guys, I fucked up.
And I really need to apologize.

1840
01:37:13,084 --> 01:37:15,959
First of all, I've been
a really dodgy friend

1841
01:37:16,043 --> 01:37:18,626
to the two people
who care about me the most,

1842
01:37:18,709 --> 01:37:23,334
the people who supported me when I was
just that dorky kid fresh from Australia,

1843
01:37:24,084 --> 01:37:28,543
the ones who stayed by my side,
even when I majorly neglected them,

1844
01:37:29,459 --> 01:37:32,709
the ones who,
for some reason, never gave up on me.

1845
01:37:32,793 --> 01:37:36,543
It doesn't matter who has
the most friends or likes or followers.

1846
01:37:36,626 --> 01:37:39,001
If you just have one or two great friends

1847
01:37:39,084 --> 01:37:41,918
who will support you
even when you're being a butt slut,

1848
01:37:42,001 --> 01:37:43,418
then you've got it all.

1849
01:37:44,209 --> 01:37:46,376
And that is something worth fighting for,

1850
01:37:46,459 --> 01:37:48,459
so fuck what other people think.

1851
01:37:48,543 --> 01:37:52,001
Yeah, like, fuck being popular.
Fuck being cool.

1852
01:37:52,084 --> 01:37:53,668
Fuck it in the ass.

1853
01:37:53,751 --> 01:37:55,376
Stephie, language.

1854
01:37:56,001 --> 01:37:59,751
I never planned on taking
two decades to graduate, obvi,

1855
01:37:59,834 --> 01:38:02,709
but the class of 2022
showed me something that

1856
01:38:02,793 --> 01:38:05,376
I could never have learned
when I was in high school the first time.

1857
01:38:05,459 --> 01:38:06,876
We have a school archive!

1858
01:38:07,543 --> 01:38:12,709
And that is every single one of us
is so unique, and that's awesome.

1859
01:38:12,793 --> 01:38:15,084
Why fit in when you can stand out?

1860
01:38:15,959 --> 01:38:19,459
And so, okay, now I'm gonna do something

1861
01:38:19,543 --> 01:38:22,501
that I wish I had
the confidence to do 20 years ago,

1862
01:38:23,126 --> 01:38:25,126
and that is being my real self.

1863
01:38:25,793 --> 01:38:29,001
{\an8}And yeah, I'm still afraid that
if I show everyone my real self,

1864
01:38:29,084 --> 01:38:30,959
{\an8}the wrong people will make fun of me.

1865
01:38:31,459 --> 01:38:34,084
{\an8}But it's the only way
for the right people to see me.

1866
01:38:36,043 --> 01:38:38,168
{\an8}And they're the ones
I care about the most.

1867
01:38:40,918 --> 01:38:44,501
{\an8}They're the ones I want,
more than anything, to forgive me.

1868
01:38:56,876 --> 01:38:59,584
Dad, stop. Stop it.

1869
01:38:59,668 --> 01:39:00,959
That's it.

1870
01:39:01,876 --> 01:39:03,459
Dad, just stop it! Press stop.

1871
01:39:03,543 --> 01:39:05,293
-Sorry.

1872
01:39:05,376 --> 01:39:06,918
That was beautiful.

1873
01:39:09,668 --> 01:39:10,501
Tiff.

1874
01:39:10,584 --> 01:39:15,543
My daughter
won't, um, unblock me unless…

1875
01:39:17,001 --> 01:39:18,293
I came to apologize to you.

1876
01:39:19,376 --> 01:39:21,084
-Seriously?
-So…

1877
01:39:21,168 --> 01:39:22,043
Um…

1878
01:39:23,126 --> 01:39:26,251
I am sorry for everything I've done

1879
01:39:27,126 --> 01:39:31,251
and for treating you
like human garbage all these years.

1880
01:39:31,334 --> 01:39:34,209
Tiff, I'm not the one you should be trying
to make things right with.

1881
01:39:34,918 --> 01:39:37,168
You and Blaine have an awesome daughter

1882
01:39:37,251 --> 01:39:41,501
who's so smart and way cooler
than what you and I ever were.

1883
01:39:43,334 --> 01:39:45,001
Stop competing with her.

1884
01:39:45,584 --> 01:39:47,501
There's enough room for both of you.

1885
01:39:48,126 --> 01:39:50,043
There's enough room for all of us.

1886
01:39:50,543 --> 01:39:52,501
We don't need to fight with each other.

1887
01:39:53,834 --> 01:39:54,668
You're right.

1888
01:39:55,501 --> 01:39:59,043
I am really sorry, Stephanie,

1889
01:39:59,793 --> 01:40:00,751
for…

1890
01:40:02,751 --> 01:40:03,584
everything.

1891
01:40:06,459 --> 01:40:07,334
Yeah.

1892
01:40:09,043 --> 01:40:10,584
Apology accepted.

1893
01:40:13,543 --> 01:40:15,001
-Okay.
-Tiff, wait, um…

1894
01:40:15,793 --> 01:40:18,418
I never let a guest leave
without a gift.

1895
01:40:19,793 --> 01:40:21,209
-Hang on.
-That is…

1896
01:40:21,293 --> 01:40:24,126
-Just wait… wait one second.
-…so cute.

1897
01:40:27,501 --> 01:40:28,543
That's for you.

1898
01:40:32,418 --> 01:40:34,834
-Thank you so much. Thank you.
-Thanks for coming over.

1899
01:40:34,918 --> 01:40:36,459
Lance Harrison.

1900
01:40:39,293 --> 01:40:40,959
Oh my God.

1901
01:40:46,626 --> 01:40:49,834
-I just wanna say thanks to my grandma--
-No, no, no, no.

1902
01:40:49,918 --> 01:40:52,876
Just so everybody knows,
nobody else do that. Okay.

1903
01:40:53,376 --> 01:40:55,543
Britney Jean Balbo.

1904
01:40:59,418 --> 01:41:01,251
-Yes, Bri!
-Go, baby!

1905
01:41:01,334 --> 01:41:02,376
Go, Bri!

1906
01:41:04,959 --> 01:41:06,209
{\an8}

1907
01:41:09,209 --> 01:41:11,543
Stephanie Marie Conway.

1908
01:41:13,459 --> 01:41:15,626
That's my daughter!

1909
01:41:23,668 --> 01:41:24,918
Um, oh…

1910
01:41:25,709 --> 01:41:28,709
Here. To pay
for all the damage at the lake house.

1911
01:41:28,793 --> 01:41:30,168
Where did you get this from?

1912
01:41:30,251 --> 01:41:32,668
I sold the Cabriolet.
Time to grow up.

1913
01:41:33,251 --> 01:41:35,501
Aw.

1914
01:41:35,584 --> 01:41:37,001
I am so proud of you.

1915
01:41:37,084 --> 01:41:38,209
Aw, thanks, Marth.

1916
01:41:39,043 --> 01:41:40,584
I'm so lucky to have you as a friend.

1917
01:41:48,418 --> 01:41:49,376
Congrats, Steph.

1918
01:41:50,043 --> 01:41:50,876
Thanks.

1919
01:41:50,959 --> 01:41:53,376
Now, to end our ceremony,
I'd like to invite

1920
01:41:53,459 --> 01:41:57,709
our 2022 class valedictorian, Janet Singh.

1921
01:42:00,209 --> 01:42:01,876
-After you.
-Thank you!

1922
01:42:05,126 --> 01:42:06,293
Go, Janet!

1923
01:42:08,626 --> 01:42:10,251
{\an8}Okay, listen up.

1924
01:42:10,334 --> 01:42:14,418
{\an8}It is hot as hell,
and this ceremony is way too long.

1925
01:42:14,501 --> 01:42:16,709
So I'm just gonna say one thing.

1926
01:42:16,793 --> 01:42:19,834
Who you are in high school
doesn't define you.

1927
01:42:20,709 --> 01:42:23,209
And I would also like
to officially announce

1928
01:42:23,293 --> 01:42:25,626
my campaign for US president.

1929
01:42:25,709 --> 01:42:27,626
Vote for me in 2040.

1930
01:42:28,168 --> 01:42:29,168
Yay!

1931
01:42:32,209 --> 01:42:35,959
And lastly,
I have one question for all of you.

1932
01:42:37,043 --> 01:42:39,001
-Are you ready…
-♪ Are you ready ♪

1933
01:42:39,084 --> 01:42:40,834
-♪ For the Harding ♪
-…for the Harding…

1934
01:42:41,959 --> 01:42:44,043
-♪ Bulldogettes ♪
-…Bulldogettes?

1935
01:42:46,668 --> 01:42:50,834
♪ Oh, good gracious ass is bodacious
Flirtatious, trying to show patience ♪

1936
01:42:50,918 --> 01:42:53,876
-♪ And can't nobody stop the juice… ♪
-No way. Stephanie's Dance Grooves?

1937
01:42:53,959 --> 01:42:56,418
-♪ I said, it's gettin' hot in here ♪
-♪ So hot ♪

1938
01:42:56,501 --> 01:42:58,043
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪

1939
01:42:58,126 --> 01:43:01,834
♪ I am gettin' so hot
I wanna take my clothes off ♪

1940
01:43:01,918 --> 01:43:04,043
-♪ It's gettin' hot in here ♪
-♪ So hot ♪

1941
01:43:04,126 --> 01:43:05,793
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪

1942
01:43:05,876 --> 01:43:09,293
♪ I am gettin' so hot
I wanna take my clothes off ♪

1943
01:43:13,834 --> 01:43:16,834
-♪ Come on over, come on over, baby ♪

1944
01:43:17,793 --> 01:43:20,876
♪ Come on over, come on, come on ♪

1945
01:43:20,959 --> 01:43:22,501
♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪

1946
01:43:24,709 --> 01:43:26,001
-Ready?
-Okay!

1947
01:43:26,084 --> 01:43:29,793
♪ We are the Bulldogs
We like it rough, rough, rough ♪

1948
01:43:29,876 --> 01:43:33,084
♪ No one can beat us
No, we're too tough ♪

1949
01:43:33,168 --> 01:43:34,334
-Strong arms!
-♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

1950
01:43:34,418 --> 01:43:38,126
♪ We fight to the finish
We're in it to win it ♪

1951
01:43:38,209 --> 01:43:41,626
-♪ Ah, yeah ♪
-♪ Moment, moment, moment ♪

1952
01:43:43,584 --> 01:43:46,126
-♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪
-Okay, I have to go.

1953
01:43:47,001 --> 01:43:50,626
-Kelly Clarkson!
-♪ For a moment like this ♪

1954
01:43:50,709 --> 01:43:54,876
♪ Some people search forever ♪

1955
01:43:54,959 --> 01:43:58,001
♪ For that one special kiss ♪

1956
01:43:58,084 --> 01:44:04,376
♪ Oh, I can't believe
It's happening to me ♪

1957
01:44:04,459 --> 01:44:08,168
♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪

1958
01:44:08,251 --> 01:44:12,543
♪ For a moment, moment, moment ♪

1959
01:44:25,251 --> 01:44:29,001
♪ We are the Bulldogs
We like it rough, rough, rough ♪

1960
01:44:29,084 --> 01:44:31,751
♪ No one can beat us
No, we're too tough ♪

1961
01:44:32,876 --> 01:44:35,793
♪ We are the Bulldogs
We are hot stuff ♪

1962
01:44:36,543 --> 01:44:39,584
♪ No one can beat us
'Cause we're enough ♪

1963
01:44:40,459 --> 01:44:42,668
♪ Yeah, yeah, we fight to the finish ♪

1964
01:44:42,751 --> 01:44:44,459
♪ We're in it to win it ♪

1965
01:44:44,959 --> 01:44:48,626
♪ Oh, yeah ♪

1966
01:44:48,709 --> 01:44:52,251
♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪

1967
01:44:52,334 --> 01:44:56,418
-♪ For a moment, moment, moment ♪
-♪ Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go ♪

1968
01:44:56,501 --> 01:44:59,209
-♪ Like this ♪

1969
01:45:01,793 --> 01:45:04,626
Oh my God! Oh my God!

1970
01:45:08,168 --> 01:45:11,293
Well, then, we should go out?

1971
01:45:12,043 --> 01:45:14,084
-No duh.

1972
01:45:26,001 --> 01:45:28,084
♪ Some people say I look like me dad ♪

1973
01:45:29,293 --> 01:45:30,959
♪ Oh-oh ♪

1974
01:45:32,168 --> 01:45:33,751
♪ Hey, hey ♪

1975
01:45:33,834 --> 01:45:35,168
♪ Oh-oh ♪

1976
01:45:38,126 --> 01:45:39,584
♪ Oh-oh ♪

1977
01:45:42,168 --> 01:45:45,043
♪ I said, hey, boy
Sittin' in your tree" ♪

1978
01:45:45,126 --> 01:45:47,293
♪ Mummy always wants you to come for tea ♪

1979
01:45:47,376 --> 01:45:49,459
{\an8}♪ Don't be shy, straighten up your tie ♪

1980
01:45:49,543 --> 01:45:52,001
{\an8}♪ Get down from your tree house
Sittin' in the sky ♪

1981
01:45:52,084 --> 01:45:53,876
{\an8}♪ I wanna know just what to do ♪

1982
01:45:53,959 --> 01:45:56,293
{\an8}♪ Is it very big?
Is there room for two? ♪

1983
01:45:56,376 --> 01:45:58,251
{\an8}♪ I got a house with windows and doors ♪

1984
01:45:58,334 --> 01:46:01,209
♪ I'll show you mine
If you show me yours ♪

1985
01:46:01,293 --> 01:46:03,334
♪ Gotta let me in ♪

1986
01:46:03,418 --> 01:46:05,084
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

1987
01:46:05,168 --> 01:46:07,918
{\an8}♪ Let the fun begin ♪

1988
01:46:08,501 --> 01:46:10,043
{\an8}♪ Hey ♪

1989
01:46:10,126 --> 01:46:11,959
{\an8}♪ I'm the wolf today ♪

1990
01:46:12,043 --> 01:46:13,626
{\an8}♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

1991
01:46:13,709 --> 01:46:18,126
{\an8}♪ I'll huff, I'll puff
I'll huff, I'll puff, I'll blow you away ♪

1992
01:46:18,209 --> 01:46:19,793
{\an8}♪ Say you will, say you won't ♪

1993
01:46:19,876 --> 01:46:21,668
{\an8}♪ Say you'll do what I don't ♪

1994
01:46:21,751 --> 01:46:23,876
{\an8}♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪

1995
01:46:25,001 --> 01:46:26,459
♪ C'est la vie ♪

1996
01:46:26,543 --> 01:46:28,251
{\an8}♪ Say you will, say you won't ♪

1997
01:46:28,334 --> 01:46:30,459
{\an8}♪ Say you'll do what I don't ♪

1998
01:46:30,543 --> 01:46:33,751
{\an8}-♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪
-♪ Get a life… ♪

1999
01:46:33,834 --> 01:46:36,043
{\an8}Who doesn't want a Hummer
on their big night?

2000
01:46:36,126 --> 01:46:37,584
{\an8}Not me.

2001
01:46:37,668 --> 01:46:40,126
{\an8}♪ Do you ever get lonely
Playing with your toys? ♪

2002
01:46:40,209 --> 01:46:41,918
{\an8}-♪ We can talk, we can sing ♪

2003
01:46:42,001 --> 01:46:44,918
{\an8}-♪ I'll be the queen… ♪
-I love belly button play.

2004
01:46:45,001 --> 01:46:47,918
{\an8}I really wanna get spit-roasted
by two leather daddies.

2005
01:46:48,001 --> 01:46:50,918
Never before. I'm sex… sex nothing.

2006
01:46:51,001 --> 01:46:53,918
{\an8}-Stop.
-Okay, all righty.

2007
01:46:54,001 --> 01:46:55,834
{\an8}-
-♪ Gotta let me in ♪

2008
01:46:55,918 --> 01:46:58,001
{\an8}♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

2009
01:46:58,084 --> 01:47:00,501
-♪ Let the fun begin ♪

2010
01:47:00,584 --> 01:47:01,793
-A-mark.
-♪ Hey ♪

2011
01:47:01,876 --> 01:47:02,834
B-mark.

2012
01:47:02,918 --> 01:47:04,584
♪ I'm the wolf today ♪

2013
01:47:04,668 --> 01:47:06,459
{\an8}♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

2014
01:47:06,543 --> 01:47:07,959
{\an8}♪ I'll huff, I'll puff… ♪

2015
01:47:08,043 --> 01:47:09,918
{\an8}I'm making a love heart sign.

2016
01:47:10,001 --> 01:47:11,418
{\an8}♪ I'll blow you away… ♪

2017
01:47:11,501 --> 01:47:13,793
{\an8}What am I doing?
I'm just making a love heart.

2018
01:47:13,876 --> 01:47:15,668
{\an8}Welcome to Book Corner
with Sam Richardson.

2019
01:47:15,751 --> 01:47:17,001
{\an8}♪ Say to me ♪

2020
01:47:17,084 --> 01:47:18,334
{\an8}-♪ Yeah… ♪
-Oh.

2021
01:47:18,418 --> 01:47:19,709
{\an8}Oppa Gangnam Style.

2022
01:47:19,793 --> 01:47:21,543
{\an8}-Oppa. Oppa.
-Oppa Gangnam Style.

2023
01:47:22,418 --> 01:47:23,376
{\an8}Yeah, very fast.

2024
01:47:23,459 --> 01:47:26,209
{\an8}-♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪
-♪ What do you know? ♪

2025
01:47:26,793 --> 01:47:28,834
{\an8}♪ C'est la vie ♪

2026
01:47:38,001 --> 01:47:38,876
{\an8}♪ Hey, hey ♪

2027
01:47:38,959 --> 01:47:40,418
{\an8}♪ Na-na-na-eh ♪

2028
01:47:41,251 --> 01:47:42,626
{\an8}♪ Na-na-na-oh ♪

2029
01:47:43,293 --> 01:47:44,793
♪ Na-na-na-eh ♪

2030
01:47:45,376 --> 01:47:47,751
{\an8}♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪

2031
01:47:47,834 --> 01:47:49,751
{\an8}♪ Say you will, say you won't ♪

2032
01:47:49,834 --> 01:47:51,959
{\an8}♪ Say you'll do what I don't ♪

2033
01:47:52,043 --> 01:47:54,126
{\an8}♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪

2034
01:47:54,209 --> 01:47:56,543
♪ Wanna say c'est la vie ♪

2035
01:47:56,626 --> 01:47:58,459
♪ Say you will, say you won't ♪

2036
01:47:58,543 --> 01:48:00,751
♪ Say you'll do what I don't ♪

2037
01:48:00,834 --> 01:48:02,709
♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪

2038
01:48:02,793 --> 01:48:04,168
♪ Fight like me dad as well ♪

2039
01:48:04,251 --> 01:48:06,168
♪ C'est la vie ♪

2040
01:48:07,626 --> 01:48:10,043
-♪ Na-na-na-oh ♪
-♪ C'est la vie ♪

2041
01:48:10,126 --> 01:48:11,459
{\an8}♪ Na-na-na-eh ♪

2042
01:48:11,959 --> 01:48:14,209
{\an8}-♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
-♪ C'est la vie ♪

2043
01:48:16,834 --> 01:48:21,251
I really do want to go to college.
So what do I need to do?

2044
01:48:21,334 --> 01:48:24,751
I… I would do anything.
I mean, not…

2045
01:48:24,834 --> 01:48:25,751
Oh.

2046
01:48:25,834 --> 01:48:29,751
Sorry, I just… Yeah, I… I meant… anything.

2047
01:48:31,168 --> 01:48:33,584
No, I didn't… Sorry.
I didn't mean that. I meant…

2048
01:48:33,668 --> 01:48:36,709
Oh my God. I meant I will do anything…

2049
01:48:38,543 --> 01:48:40,334
-Oh my God.
-…non-sexually.

2050
01:48:40,418 --> 01:48:44,918
Oh, good, good. Don't ever resort to that
unless you have to.

2051
01:48:45,001 --> 01:48:47,709
And if that's what you wanna do
with your life, then do it,

2052
01:48:47,793 --> 01:48:50,668
but don't do it with me.
I'm terrible in bed.

2053
01:48:57,126 --> 01:49:01,001
♪ If this is all I need
And all I believe in ♪

2054
01:49:01,084 --> 01:49:04,918
♪ Will you keep singing
Keep on moving forever? ♪

2055
01:49:05,001 --> 01:49:08,834
♪ I've got this feeling
And I'm better than free ♪

2056
01:49:08,918 --> 01:49:11,418
♪ I'll keep on singing, keep on moving ♪

2057
01:49:11,501 --> 01:49:12,751
♪ Remember ♪

2058
01:49:12,834 --> 01:49:14,709
♪ Yeah, I'm waking up and go-go ♪

2059
01:49:14,793 --> 01:49:16,543
♪ Yeah, got me going loco ♪

2060
01:49:16,626 --> 01:49:18,126
♪ This is all I want ♪

2061
01:49:18,209 --> 01:49:20,126
♪ The beat is so strong ♪

2062
01:49:20,209 --> 01:49:22,584
♪ Yeah, I'm waking up and go-go ♪

2063
01:49:22,668 --> 01:49:24,584
♪ Yeah, got me going loco ♪

2064
01:49:24,668 --> 01:49:26,043
♪ This is all I want ♪

2065
01:49:26,126 --> 01:49:28,376
♪ The beat is so strong ♪

2066
01:49:29,501 --> 01:49:31,251
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪

2067
01:49:31,334 --> 01:49:33,168
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪

2068
01:49:33,251 --> 01:49:35,126
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪

2069
01:49:35,209 --> 01:49:37,709
♪ Got me dancing all night long ♪

2070
01:49:37,793 --> 01:49:41,293
♪ I'm waking up and go
No, never taking it slow ♪

2071
01:49:41,376 --> 01:49:45,209
♪ Will you keep talking
Keep on grooving forever? ♪

2072
01:49:45,293 --> 01:49:49,126
♪ I've got this feeling
And I'm higher than free ♪

2073
01:49:49,209 --> 01:49:51,418
♪ I'll keep on living
Keep on moving ♪

2074
01:49:51,501 --> 01:49:53,001
♪ Remember ♪

2075
01:49:53,084 --> 01:49:55,084
♪ Yeah, I'm waking up and go-go ♪

2076
01:49:55,168 --> 01:49:57,084
♪ Yeah, got me going loco ♪

2077
01:49:57,168 --> 01:49:58,418
♪ This is all I want ♪

2078
01:49:58,501 --> 01:50:00,293
♪ The beat is so strong ♪

2079
01:50:01,043 --> 01:50:02,751
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪

2080
01:50:02,834 --> 01:50:04,501
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪

2081
01:50:04,584 --> 01:50:06,626
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪

2082
01:50:06,709 --> 01:50:08,876
♪ Got me dancing all night long ♪

2083
01:50:08,959 --> 01:50:10,126
♪ This is all I want ♪

2084
01:50:10,209 --> 01:50:12,251
♪ The beat is so strong ♪

2085
01:50:12,334 --> 01:50:14,001
♪ The beat is so strong ♪

2086
01:50:14,084 --> 01:50:17,043
♪ Got me dancing all night long ♪

2087
01:50:19,168 --> 01:50:20,293
♪ Let me talk it out ♪

2088
01:50:21,668 --> 01:50:22,543
♪ Yeah ♪

2089
01:50:23,334 --> 01:50:24,668
♪ Listen up right here ♪

2090
01:50:26,251 --> 01:50:30,209
♪ Lately, I've been picking
Picking up on you ♪

2091
01:50:30,293 --> 01:50:34,501
♪ Oh, every time you come around
There's something new ♪

2092
01:50:34,584 --> 01:50:38,709
♪ So let me in your mind
Yeah, let me read the room ♪

2093
01:50:38,793 --> 01:50:43,334
♪ Yeah, we can work it out
If we just let it loose ♪

2094
01:50:44,751 --> 01:50:45,584
♪ You know ♪

2095
01:50:46,668 --> 01:50:48,168
♪ All I've got to say is ♪

2096
01:50:50,251 --> 01:50:52,001
♪ I'm running outta patience ♪

2097
01:50:52,084 --> 01:50:53,251
♪ He-hey ♪

2098
01:50:54,626 --> 01:50:56,293
♪ No more playing ♪

2099
01:50:56,793 --> 01:50:58,418
♪ You hear what I'm saying? ♪

2100
01:50:58,501 --> 01:51:00,584
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪

2101
01:51:00,668 --> 01:51:02,084
♪ Oh-oh ♪

2102
01:51:02,751 --> 01:51:04,834
♪ No misbehaving ♪

2103
01:51:04,918 --> 01:51:07,001
♪ 'Cause I'm running outta patience ♪

2104
01:51:07,084 --> 01:51:09,626
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪

2105
01:51:15,584 --> 01:51:18,043
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪

2106
01:51:19,043 --> 01:51:19,918
♪ You know ♪

2107
01:51:20,918 --> 01:51:22,543
♪ All I've got to say is ♪

2108
01:51:24,543 --> 01:51:26,251
♪ I'm running outta patience ♪

2109
01:51:28,459 --> 01:51:30,793
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪

2110
01:51:37,209 --> 01:51:39,376
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪