I spent 15 years in prison.
Now I'm on the outside.
Second chances are a beautiful thing.
Excuse me. Where's your line for business loans?
- Right this way, sir. - May I have some of this candy?
Oh, oh!
What kind of loan are you here for?
I'm here for a food truck loan.
Really? That's a coincidence.
I'm here for a loan for a food truck, too.
Actually, it's my third.
I specialize in molecular gastronomy.
Right, right, right.
- Do you know what that is? - Some of it.
It's the manipulation of chemical
and physical interactions with ingredients.
This truck's gonna be all ethnic street foods.
Yeah, it's Oaxaca Wonders.
So, this is Hispanic food for people who hire Hispanics?
Something like that, yeah.
- Three trucks? - Yeah.
You must have f'd it up the first two times, huh?
Don't even worry about it, my dude.
When I get my trucks up and running,
I'ma show you how it's supposed to be done.
I got 25 years of selling experience.
I keep a customer base satisfied, you know what I mean?
Mr. Cherry?
That's me. Good luck.
Damn. You getting a food truck loan or a Ph.D.?
First impressions and presentation are everything.
- Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com -
As chairman of the restoration committee,
I am thrilled to bring back this cherished rink to Brooklyn.
Come on, look alive, y'all.
As a kid, On a Roll
was one of my favorite places to gather with my friends.
Oh, you don't know how dope it is to see
Shay up there doing her Michelle Obama impression.
It is inspiring.
That's just Mom.
No, no.
That's only because you know her like this.
I remember when she was so broke, in her crib,
her TV had two channels... on and off.
Yeah, slept in her car one time.
Wow. If she could do it, I know I could do it.
- Whoo! - Shay, Shay!
- Come on. Your mom. - And without further ado,
I want to declare On a Roll officially open!
Let's go, Brooklyn!
Thank you so much. We appreciate it.
- Can we go now? - Are you kidding?
You guys didn't even skate yet.
My feet are tired just from walking here.
Boy, are you serious? We was only three blocks away.
Can we hang out at Starbucks until you're done?
- Aw, hell, no! Have some respect. - Oh, come on!
Your mother's saving a Brooklyn landmark here, okay?
On a Roll is as Brooklyn as Brooklyn can be.
This rink is so important to us.
It... it basically raised half of Brooklyn.
Did you know each other then?
Aw, man, not yet.
I would have pulled her like a hamstring,
but I didn't know her yet. You know what I'm saying?
Thank God because y'all would be 25
instead of 15, ya know what I'm saying?
Shay know what I'm saying?
But this place right here gave me my first taste
of hard-working responsibility.
I made head skate guard in no time.
Now, I didn't work here, but I put in work with my skate crew.
We called ourselves the BK Shortyz.
It was Ce-Ce, my bestie Turtle, me and my girl, Regina.
BK Shortyz in full effect!
Let's get it!
We would challenge other teams to skate-offs.
They were like dance battles, but on skates.
There was always some other crew trying to take our crown.
Now, let's see what the honeys got to offer!
They come out, doing their little tricks and moves,
but they didn't have nothing on us
because at the end of the day,
if we couldn't out-skate you...
Let's get these bitches!
Shay Boogie?
Shay Boogie!
Lisa "Turtle" Johnson!
- Girl! - What up, mama?
Oh, I missed you so much.
You look so good.
Girl, you look so good.
- These are my kids. - Aww.
Yeah, and you know Tray.
Mm-hmm.
Oh, God.
I see you still rolling with the Michelin Man in blackface.
- Girl. - I told you, I'm posted up.
No, he's here for the kids.
I'm in post position.
But your ears must be burnin'
because I was just telling them about the BK Shortyz!
Unh-unh.
I wonder what the other girls are up to.
I see them heifers all the time.
We were just as Ce-Ce baby christening last Sunday.
Huh?
Is that "FOMO" I'm reading
on your perfectly beat face, Miss America?
'Cause you ain't missin' nothing.
I seen your Facebook.
I know you more Shay Bougie and less Shay Boogie these days.
Girl, please. I am still the same ol' Shay Boogie.
You want to exchange numbers?
Why don't we just get all the girls together tonight,
and we party like it's 1999, damn it.
Okay!
I think there might be a little Shay Boogie left up in there.
It's 100% Shay Boogie up in here.
Yo, Shannon!
The kids said they want some Nobu sushi for lunch.
They said it's fancy and mad expensive.
I assume you're gonna pay for it because you know
I ain't got that kind of dough.
Bitch, then this dude took a number two on the 2 train.
We call that a double deuce.
Stop!
That happens all the time.
Ooh, ooh, can you turn that up? Turn that up!
Y'all remember that skate battle in 1996?
5, 6, 7, 8.
Ooh, ooh.
His first night alone with the baby.
Sir, can you turn that down?
Hey, honey.
No, you cannot kill the baby by burping him too much.
Okay, bye.
I love that man to death, but he is so damn dumb.
That's too bad, Ce-Ce, because my boo,
Greg, he smart as hell.
- For real? - He a sweetie, too.
Ohh. That's sweet.
Ooh, ooh, ooh. I got this. No arguments at all.
I'm taking care of this.
Thank you, girl.
Y'all, let me call my husband.
He limited.
Ooh, bathroom.
Thanks again, girl, because you know my money tight
as one-day-old braids.
I know you don't know nothing about that.
I do know about that... the one-day-old braids.
You know what?
My job is hiring a temp, so why don't you go ahead
and e-mail me your résumé,
and I'll put in a good word for you.
- For real? - Mm-hmm.
Boogie, that would be so dope.
Whoo! You the real MVP for real.
Yes. Thank you.
Okay, but don't actually call any of those references.
You'll just get my brother Dwain.
He got a nice, white phone voice,
and that nigga owe me a favor.
Oh, okay.
Looking good, kid.
You think this suit says,
"You should give me a loan for a food truck?"
- Yes. - "'Cause I'm a responsible dude."
Yes, cuzzo.
You looking like a CEO, you know what I'm saying?
And I'm your assistant CEO.
And I'ma tell you something.
I'm with you through thick and thin.
Oh, I gotta go, cuzzo. Oh, yeah.
I got me a jump-off, and she throwing up the bat-signal.
- Look at that. - Bobby, you can't leave me hanging, man.
You my ride and my emotional support.
Mm!
I can't come because I'm with my cousin today.
You owe me this.
Look at this. She got a friend. Do you see that?
- Ooh! - She got a... yes.
Man, I can get a loan for a food truck later, man.
That's what I'm talking about. Come on.
Oh, shit!
No, no, no, no, no. What are you doing?
I'm doing what's right.
- You can't touch an OWL. - What is an OWL?
An Old White Lady.
It's okay. I'm gonna help you, okay?
You fell down.
Where do you live? I'm gonna take you home.
I don't know.
Just leave her where you found her.
Like a half-eaten burrito?
No. Bobby, get the car.
What are you talking about?
- Bobby, get the car! - Okay.
Here's our new spring collection which I like
because it's very flowy and...
Here, girl, your veggie burger.
Thank you, Lisa.
Amy, you had the masala bowl,
and you had the supergreens salad.
Okay.
Did you get something for yourself?
Oh, I kind of didn't know lunch was covered,
so I just brought something in.
Just leftovers.
Catfish and corn bread.
You know what? Do you got enough to split?
You know I got you, girl.
Good.
- It's good, right? - Yes, girl. Mm.
Boogie, I hope I didn't embarrass you back there.
Turtle, do you know how relieved I am
to finally have someone I could relate to on the same level?
It's not a lot of us up in here.
I don't even know why I do this job.
I should be designing fashion shows on major runways
in Milan doing me, living my best life.
I feel you, girl.
Lisa. You all right?
What's going on?
Greg broke up with me.
I don't understand what happened.
He just flipped.
And he's already posting pics with him and his side chick.
And it's already got 173 likes.
Fuck her.
And you know what really pisses me off, Boogie?
He said that he's keeping the couch that we bought together.
Go ahead and let it out. Come on, let it out, boo-boo.
Let it out.
- Why? - Yeah, maybe a little bit softer.
Let it out a little bit softer.
Whoo.
I think that's it.
No worries.
That's why I'm happy we're here together.
We can look out for each other again
like we used to, all right?
You know what?
You up to doing my schedule for me?
Oh. Um, yeah.
Okay, so in-house meeting at 3:00, model fitting at 4:00.
Oh, and erase everything else from my schedule after that
because tonight, we gonna go get your couch back, girl.
Oh, hell, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Don't worry about it. We'll take care of you.
We good, we good, we good.
Yo! Open up!
Me and Bobby got this old white woman with us.
- Man, we need your help. - Nope.
- What are you doing to me? - No, don't leave!
Come on, son!
Ohh!
Just be cool, okay, all right.
Just look at the pretty pictures, all right?
I'll be right back, okay.
Tray! I don't know about this.
Everybody, be cool!
Okay, thank God I watched 10,000 hours of "Law & Order,"
so I basically grew up
in a district attorney's office, okay? I'm a pro.
The first thing we need to do is go in her purse
and find out who this old white lady is.
And here is the contents of said old white lady's purse.
No wallet, no ID. Damn!
Look, somebody already robbed her.
That mean they gonna really put this on us.
They ain't putting nothing no nobody
because look what's right here.
A Golden Crust packet. You understand?
That's a Jamaican joint, so the old white lady loves beef patties.
Interesting.
So what else we got?
Seems like the old white lady's near some kind of a park.
- Check that out, Tray. - Mm-hmm.
That's Prospect Park.
How do you know for sure, though?
The elm trees.
Prospect Park is the only place in the city
- with elm trees and wildflower garlic. - Wildflower garlic.
Interesting.
I seen them cups somewhere. That's in the prison psych ward,
but what's all that powder stuff on it?
That's pill residue.
Oh, so Mrs. Owl is a pill popper.
Okay, you know what?
I got it.
Mrs. Owl is an ex-con
who sells opioids at a local park
and kills Jamaicans who step in her territory.
Boom, bip, that's the theory to beat.
That's the theory to beat right there.
Gentlemen, I recognize this at the nursing home
that my grandmother's in.
Lydia, because she got hairy legs,
so she bring me down there to lotion her legs up
so the hair lay down flat on her knee caps and thighs.
Mm, she sound sexy as hell.
Hey, back off, kid!
So, so, so how do we find this nursing home?
Easy!
We just triangulate the locations we have here.
We are looking for a nursing home
near Golden Crust near Prospect Park.
- Case closed, cuzzo. - Science!
- Bravo! Science! - Science, yeah.
Nigga, science? You just wrote "interesting" over and over again.
It was interesting to me.
No, no, no, no, no! No!
Mrs. Owl!
All right, we get Lisa's couch, and we out.
- Copy. - Copy.
- Lisa, you got the key? - I know where he keep it at.
Okay, Ce-Ce, you keep lookout.
Regina, me and you, we gonna carry the couch to your car.
- Bet. - All right.
Lisa! You all right?
Hey!
Come on, BK Shortyz, let's do this!
What happened to the key?
Girl, key is to brick as brick is to key.
- Is that a riddle? - What's up?
What, you scared?
Hell, naw.
Shay Boogie is in full effect, baby.
Come on, come on. Let's hurry.
- Right here, right here. - We gonna get this sucker.
Oh, yeah, we gonna rob this... wait a minute.
- One, two... okay. - This is so nice.
Who is his interior decorator?
- Is that a Mika Marchay? - Okay!
I bid on this!
Hey, Boogie, focus.
Okay, all right, all right.
But hey, I thought you said this was a couch.
It is a couch.
But it looks like a sofa to me.
It's a couch, whatever. Come on, just lift it.
- If you say so. - Okay, one, two, three.
Ooh, shit.
Okay, all right, all right.
That way, that way. That way.
- Go, go, go. - Watch the table.
Watch the table, watch the table.
- Ahh! - Oh, shit!
Ow! Ow!
Turtle! Is this guy married?
I told you he was messing with some other chick.
- Are you serious? - What?
Turtle, if he's married, you're the other chick.
I been with him just as long as she has, okay?
#ltsComplicated.
Oh, my God.
Shit. Who is this?
Does Greg have a son that's in a wheelchair?
That motherfucker scored 18 points a game.
He lead a full life.
Lisa, you ain't shit.
Can you get back on your post?
Just tell me the truth, Turtle.
Did you even buy this couch?
I was with him when he bought it. It's the same thing.
You mean when he bought it for his wife and his child
that's in a wheelchair?
Lisa, you ain't shit.
He hurt me, okay?
Now, can we please move this motherfucking couch?
Ooh!
What the hell is going on?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
Lisa, you crazy bitch.
I told you I was making things work with my family.
Wait, wait, this is her?
Greg, you have got to be kidding me.
It's not enough that you've been sleeping with this ratchet girl,
now you brought her sad, dingy,
ratchet-ass friends up in my house?
Uhh, you got a right to be pissed,
but there ain't no need of you calling us out our names.
Oh, no, no, no. I don't need an etiquette lesson from a damn burglar.
- Get outta my house! - Okay!
Damn it, Lisa, bringing all this drama.
What? Your wife the one turning up.
Oh, I'm turning up?
You broke into my house,
tried to steal my sofa and my husband.
See, I told you it was a sofa.
- I knew it was a sofa. - You know what...
Shut the fuck up, bitch!
Are you kidding me? All up in my house?
- Ow! - You rude!
Are you kidding me?
Don't be handing me shit!
Come on! How about this?
Oops, I just broke your dinosaur tooth.
This is bananas.
I'm calling the police. I'm calling the police.
We ain't scared of no police.
I'm a little scared of the police.
Greg, I'm better than this. I'm done.
You know, you can just sleep with this raggedy bitch
for all I care. I don't care.
I'm done. I'm done.
Baby, please.
Damn.
I love you, Greg.
Lisa, you ain't shit.
That's for the window.
Orderly with a wheelchair...
Would you just be cool?
The dude said he was gonna come back.
Yeah, he gonna be right back with the cops.
Will you just take a breath and relax?
- You're making me nervous. - All right.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Wow.
I can't believe people just throw people away like that.
You know something?
I would never let that happen to you, Bobby.
Never.
Thank you, cuzzo.
This the time when you're supposed to make
the same promise to me, Bobby.
Oh, I can't do that.
You... you don't take care of yourself, Traybags.
- What? - You don't. You don't.
You... you probably be on dialysis or some shit,
and I'm not changing no grown man's diaper.
- That's cold-blooded. - You're...
- Yeah. - Are you the guys here about Mrs. St. John?
Oh, yeah. Yes.
Good news. She does live here.
- I told you, "Law & Order" kid. - All right, all right.
You did, you did, you did. All right, well, look.
We got her purse, so you might want to look for her nearby.
Look for her? She's here.
Rolled in about an hour ago.
She's a wanderer, but she always comes back when she's hungry.
You know, I'm really sorry about this.
I hope we don't have to call the police.
- Oh, no. - Oh, no. Totally unnecessary.
Absolutely not.
Awesome.
Mrs. St. John is a bit of a klepto.
What?
You guys wouldn't happen to know a Jayson Watkins?
That's Jaybird. I'll take that.
Oh, get your hands off me, you black bastard!
Ohh.
That old white lady got issues.
Did she touch you, too?
What?!
Oh, wow. You got some nerve.
Before you say anything or call the police,
I know I look like a crazy person coming back here,
but I feel really terrible about what we did the other night.
And I just couldn't help but to notice
how beautiful your sofa was as I was trying to steal it.
And then... and then as I was thinking about that,
I was, like, "Shannon, you know what?
You need to apologize for that."
I just... I just wanted to say I'm sorry,
and so I got you this beautiful
matching throw pillow to go with your sofa.
I thought it'd be a nice accent.
Just leave it there.
I know I was wrong for being up in your house,
but I just ran into one of my old homegirls,
and I kind of got caught up in pretending
to be somebody that I'm not anymore.
And... and you know, I just used to be
so much fun, and I used to turn up.
You remember being, like, wild and crazy
before you had kids and before you get married and all that?
So, I should have just stopped at the "I'm sorry." I'm sorry.
I should have never been in your home like that,
and I totally understand if you don't ever want to talk to me,
but girl, your taste is good.
You got really good taste, but I'm...
Can you get off my property?
I'm s... I'm really sorry. I apologize.
Okay, thank you.
What the hell was I thinking?