1
00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,926
[theme music playing]
2
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[man] Hey!
3
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Bean, it's really you.
4
00:00:30,238 --> 00:00:33,658
Yes, Mom, it's... it's me. I grew.
5
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Mostly my teeth.
6
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You... You were turned to stone.
7
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My God! And you freed me? Bean, I...
8
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[crying]
9
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I... I can't believe you're back.
10
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This is all so crazy.
11
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[stammers] I can't really believe
that you're alive and Elfo is dead.
12
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I had to choose between... I had to choose you. [sighs]
13
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Oh, there, there. Don't cry, darling.
Mommy's here now.
14
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Wow. I feel better already.
15
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What do you call this?
16
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Affection.
17
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Hey. Who goes there?
18
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[Bean] Princess Tiabeanie
and Queen Dagmar!
19
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Oi, you havin' a bit of a laugh?
20
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Princess Bean is always drunk
at this hour, and you ain't even slurring!
21
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And Queen Dagmar? [laughs]
22
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She's been dead for years.
23
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No, but I haven't eaten in over a decade,
so hurry up and open the gate.
24
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[gasps] Your Majesty...
25
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[screams]
26
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I deserve this fate for doubting you!
27
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Ah, that unforgettable stench
of manure and boiling cabbage.
28
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There's cabbage?
29
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[shrieks] The ghost of Queen Dagmar!
30
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Is it really you?
31
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Bunty. Still adorably dim, I see.
32
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Dim as the day is long, Your Majesty.
33
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Stop poking the royal tit, dear.
34
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[indistinct chatter]
35
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Sorcerio, Odval.
36
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I can't believe my eyes.
37
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Dad! Dad! You're not gonna believe this!
Open up!
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[groaning] Come on...
39
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Whoa! Holy mother of Bean.
40
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Is it really you?
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Why don't you kiss me and find out?
42
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Whoa.
43
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I've been dreaming of this moment
for 15 years.
44
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Look at you.
You haven't changed a bit.
45
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[chuckles]
46
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And you. You've only got bigger...
47
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[stammers] Better.
48
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[chuckles]
49
00:02:53,798 --> 00:02:58,178
I was so sad about losin' ya,
I turned to food for solace.
50
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But you're back!
51
00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:01,511
Let's throw a huge feast!
52
00:03:01,598 --> 00:03:03,638
I don't need
all that attention, sweetheart.
53
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I'll arrange for something
small and tasteful.
54
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[crowd cheering and applauding]
55
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[crowd] Dagmar!
56
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Incredible.
57
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All that malarkey with the magic elf blood
actually paid off.
58
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It took all season, but it did.
59
00:03:26,664 --> 00:03:30,594
And by season, I mean fall or summer,
or whatever this is.
60
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[herald] Hear ye, hear ye!
61
00:03:32,462 --> 00:03:36,052
Returning to the court
for the first time in 15 years,
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once a statue, now statuesque,
it's the dagmarvelous Dagmar!
63
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[all cheering and applauding]
64
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The long wait is over.
65
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Your wonderful queen has arrived.
66
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Aw, aren't you sweet, darling?
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[all gasp]
68
00:03:53,524 --> 00:03:56,154
Thank you for your kind gasps.
69
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It's wonderful to... [gasps]
70
00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:02,413
Uh, ladies, it's gonna be okay.
71
00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:05,122
Odval, explain how it's gonna be okay.
72
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I'll begin with an introduction.
73
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Queen Oona of Dreamland,
meet Queen Dagmar...
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Also of Dreamland.
75
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The cotton candy shop called.
76
00:04:15,713 --> 00:04:17,223
They want their hair back.
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[door closes]
78
00:04:19,175 --> 00:04:22,795
Really, I only married her
to get the canal built.
79
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How practical.
80
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Yeah, real practical.
81
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She also gave me a son, so now,
I finally got an heir to the throne!
82
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Also practical.
83
00:04:31,312 --> 00:04:35,442
And you allowed that amphibian
to raise my precious Tiabeanie?
84
00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:38,315
No, no, no.
I was mostly raised by Bunty.
85
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And a bunch of friendly drunks
down at the pub.
86
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They taught me the fine art of stabbing.
87
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Believe me, I kept her
on the straight and narrow.
88
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Uh, when I had time.
89
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Dad tried for years
to find the Elixir of Life.
90
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We searched the entire world.
91
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,921
Good men died to bring you back, baby.
92
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Yeah, like Elfo, my best friend.
93
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Aw, that sweet, poor little bastard
with the funny head.
94
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I'm gonna miss him.
95
00:05:01,551 --> 00:05:04,891
Sounds to me like he deserves
a marvelous funeral.
96
00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:06,011
Great idea.
97
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I'll get someone to fish him
out of the corpse pit.
98
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[bell tolling]
99
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[bagpipes playing
100
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You know, I'm gonna miss that Elfo.
101
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He watered my plants while I was in rehab.
102
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[honk]
103
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Hey, Tess, what happened to your eye?
104
00:05:47,889 --> 00:05:49,559
Oh, I had to stop using the eye.
105
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It's just too painful
seeing the truth all the time.
106
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Ah, that's why humans tend to avoid it.
107
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The procession left without me.
108
00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:03,698
Oh, that's too bad.
109
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:06,620
I blame myself
'cause I didn't even notice.
110
00:06:06,699 --> 00:06:09,699
The queen's place
is at the side of the king.
111
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:13,406
Oh, Queen Oona. Of course.
This is terribly awkward.
112
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Please, take my spot.
I'll find another place to sit.
113
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Mmm, that's better.
114
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Yeah, sure. Both of yas with me.
115
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Plenty of Zog to go around.
116
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Beanie, make with the eulogy already.
117
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[sighs] Okay, here we go.
118
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Elfo and I had only been friends
for a few months,
119
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but they really were
the best months of my life.
120
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Even though much of his time was spent
121
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as the subject
of barbaric medical experiments...
122
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She's talking about me.
123
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...he changed the way I looked at things.
124
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In a kingdom of talking cats
and enchanted pigs and hooker fairies,
125
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Elfo grounded me in reality.
126
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I'm really, really going to miss him.
127
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Rest in peace, buddy.
128
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Sorry they had to bury you
in this aquarium.
129
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[grunts] After the king goes the queen!
130
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Sorry, Queen Oona.
I didn't mean to ruffle your feathers.
131
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For the last time, they are not feathers.
I am not bird-type!
132
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[crowd gasps]
133
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You will respect me!
134
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You are not the queen.
You are reanimated corpse!
135
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How dare you!
136
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[both grunt]
137
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[all] Queen fight! Queen fight!
Queen fight!
138
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Your Highness, do something.
139
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Ladies, ladies! Come on!
140
00:07:49,510 --> 00:07:51,850
I'm much more embarrassed
than I am aroused.
141
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[all gasp]
142
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Elfo! No!
143
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:16,624
There, there. He's with the crabs now.
144
00:08:22,460 --> 00:08:24,550
Mom! Oh, my God, are you okay?
145
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You know what, Oona? You're insane!
146
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Why don't you just get out of here?
147
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[Oona growls]
148
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:40,189
Ha! I foresee trouble
in someone's future.
149
00:08:40,269 --> 00:08:42,559
You're going to have to choose, sire.
150
00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:44,857
You can't have two queens.
151
00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:48,611
[groans] I can't just tell
one of 'em to get lost.
152
00:08:48,694 --> 00:08:50,664
Dagmar is the love of my life.
153
00:08:50,738 --> 00:08:54,778
And Queen Oona is the mother of Derek,
the heir to the throne.
154
00:08:54,867 --> 00:08:58,117
Oh, nonetheless, she is quite unpopular
in the kingdom.
155
00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:01,624
We've gotten dozens of complaints
about her late-night howling.
156
00:09:01,707 --> 00:09:05,037
If we disgrace Oona,
it could mean war with Dankmire.
157
00:09:05,127 --> 00:09:07,957
Queen Oona has outlived her usefulness.
158
00:09:08,047 --> 00:09:12,297
I don't think anyone would care
if she were to vanish.
159
00:09:13,469 --> 00:09:15,049
[hisses]
160
00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:18,097
We will see who is going to vanish.
161
00:09:21,727 --> 00:09:26,977
I had Odval clear my schedule,
so we got the whole night to ourselves.
162
00:09:27,066 --> 00:09:28,896
Oh, darling. So ambitious.
163
00:09:29,902 --> 00:09:32,452
[Luci] Excuse me. Pardon me.
Cat with a ball.
164
00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:34,320
Bean, you poor baby!
165
00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:36,617
What a horrific day you've had.
166
00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:39,331
Let's have too much wine
and forget about it all.
167
00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:42,372
Hey, I thought we were gonna have wine
and forget stuff.
168
00:09:42,456 --> 00:09:43,916
Dad, come on!
169
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,840
This is my first chance
to have a conversation with a parent
170
00:09:46,919 --> 00:09:49,009
without half of it being muttered
under their breath.
171
00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:52,048
[mutters] What is this, some kinda
slam against me? Well, okay.
172
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:53,183
[Luci grunts]
173
00:09:53,801 --> 00:09:56,301
Kick me out... Why, I oughta...
[continues muttering]
174
00:09:58,931 --> 00:10:02,181
I can't believe
I'm reduced to talking to you.
175
00:10:02,268 --> 00:10:04,898
Hey, the feeling is mutual,
but here we are.
176
00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:07,149
So, how did you... Oona!
177
00:10:07,231 --> 00:10:10,111
Hey, sweetie, wait! Let's talk. [panting]
178
00:10:12,361 --> 00:10:16,371
Damn. Well, it's gonna be
another long, lonely night.
179
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:18,029
Good night, Vip. Good night, Vap.
180
00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:23,038
[screams] Don't sneak up on a guy...
181
00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:25,252
Oh, wait. [chuckles]
Nothing to be scared of.
182
00:10:25,333 --> 00:10:28,963
Ooh, silly me.
It's just a statue of Pendergast...
183
00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:30,795
that I've never seen before.
184
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:34,760
Sculpted in a bizarre
and unlikely pose. Huh.
185
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:39,220
Oh, well. Who can say
what passes for art these days? [chuckles]
186
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,018
I had them make brunch for us.
187
00:10:44,101 --> 00:10:48,811
All your favorites: poached dodo eggs,
unicorn bacon and waffles.
188
00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:51,438
How thoughtful,
but Bean and I are going riding.
189
00:10:51,525 --> 00:10:54,775
Okay. Be safe, darling. [kisses]
190
00:10:58,032 --> 00:11:00,162
Wub you, snuggums!
191
00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:04,042
Ugh, have some dignity, man.
192
00:11:04,121 --> 00:11:06,751
You're the king,
not some lovelorn old fool.
193
00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:08,252
How did you get like this?
194
00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:09,714
You really wanna know?
195
00:11:09,794 --> 00:11:13,594
Then pour a drink, light a cigar
and hand 'em both to me.
196
00:11:14,465 --> 00:11:17,755
I was known as Zog the Warrior Prince.
197
00:11:19,804 --> 00:11:20,814
Had enough?
198
00:11:20,888 --> 00:11:23,178
Uh, yup. I'm good. [groans]
199
00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:27,143
[Zog] My older brother Yog,
who'd been next in line for the throne,
200
00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:29,358
-was mysteriously poisoned.
-[choking]
201
00:11:29,438 --> 00:11:33,938
[Zog] So the crown was mine,
but I was no ruler. I was a fighter.
202
00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:36,606
Fighting, competing, winning.
203
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:38,566
That was all I wanted to do...
204
00:11:40,449 --> 00:11:42,409
[crowd cheering and applauding]
205
00:11:42,493 --> 00:11:45,003
[Zog] ...until I laid eyes on her.
206
00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:50,880
A noble's daughter from a far-off land,
207
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,800
and she was all I'd ever wanted.
208
00:11:53,879 --> 00:11:56,129
Our life together was perfect,
209
00:11:56,215 --> 00:11:57,875
and it only got perfecter
210
00:11:57,967 --> 00:12:00,427
-when our one and only child came along.
-[Bean babbles]
211
00:12:00,511 --> 00:12:02,721
She's got her father's nose.
212
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:04,135
Nice grip.
213
00:12:04,223 --> 00:12:06,893
[Zog] But then came that fateful night.
214
00:12:06,976 --> 00:12:10,556
After my brother was poisoned,
I'd been so careful,
215
00:12:10,646 --> 00:12:15,896
but as time went on,
I was so happy, I just sorta forgot.
216
00:12:15,985 --> 00:12:17,985
I'm afraid the taster is late, sire,
217
00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:19,990
but I've brought up a bottle
from the cellar.
218
00:12:20,072 --> 00:12:21,662
The seal is unbroken.
219
00:12:29,498 --> 00:12:32,788
No, no, Beanie. That's not for you.
[chuckles]
220
00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:35,957
God knows, as my daughter,
you'll have plenty when you're older.
221
00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:38,259
Come, Zoggy. Make a toast.
222
00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:39,340
Gwapes!
223
00:12:44,221 --> 00:12:46,141
To our little family.
224
00:12:50,269 --> 00:12:51,689
No! Oh, no!
225
00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:55,861
-Please, not her. No!
-[Dagmar] Bean?
226
00:12:55,941 --> 00:12:58,111
The poison had been meant for me,
227
00:12:58,194 --> 00:13:01,324
but because Bean
had switched the glasses, I lived,
228
00:13:01,405 --> 00:13:04,905
and my beloved Dagmar was turned to stone.
229
00:13:04,992 --> 00:13:07,662
Now, I poured my heart out to you.
230
00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:10,785
You tell me, how'd you get to be
a talking cat?
231
00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:15,043
You keep shoveling waffles in your mouth
while I think of an answer. [vocalizing]
232
00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:23,052
This is where I come to clear my head,
or to sleep it off.
233
00:13:23,135 --> 00:13:26,385
[sighs] I can't believe
it's hardly changed at all.
234
00:13:26,472 --> 00:13:27,472
You know this place?
235
00:13:27,556 --> 00:13:30,516
I used to come here
when I needed a minute for myself.
236
00:13:30,601 --> 00:13:33,311
Your father, bless him,
but his voice does carry.
237
00:13:33,395 --> 00:13:35,855
How cool that we both come up here!
238
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,650
Tell me something else that you like.
239
00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:41,243
-Well, I love the smell of wet grass.
-Me, too!
240
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:43,320
Oh, how funny. We're so alike! All right, favorite food on three.
241
00:13:45,491 --> 00:13:47,371
One, two, three.
242
00:13:47,451 --> 00:13:48,451
-Beer!
-Beer!
243
00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:51,246
-Oh, my baby. Are you thirsty?
-Always.
244
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:52,540
Off to the pub.
245
00:13:59,421 --> 00:14:01,261
I fear my days are numbered.
246
00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:04,840
We will send a message to Dankmire,
of the utmost urgency.
247
00:14:09,223 --> 00:14:10,523
[turkey clucking]
248
00:14:10,599 --> 00:14:14,439
Not a word of this to anyone.
The royal family would not approve.
249
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:15,900
Bah! To hell with them!
250
00:14:16,522 --> 00:14:20,532
Zog will pay. Dagmar will pay!
Tiabeanie will pay!
251
00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:22,649
They will all pay!
252
00:14:23,153 --> 00:14:25,163
I have to warn the princess.
253
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:33,285
Oh, come on, Martin, you twit. Aim!
254
00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:35,332
I love how you already know everyone. It's almost like you were never away.
255
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:38,790
Almost.
256
00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:40,588
I'm sorry I wasn't here for you, Bean.
257
00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:42,841
I know you've had some difficult years.
258
00:14:42,923 --> 00:14:44,383
Bad shot, mate!
259
00:14:44,466 --> 00:14:46,176
I'm sure your father tried.
260
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:47,600
He got my best friend killed.
261
00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:49,968
Yes, well, I said "tried."
262
00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:52,465
Throw the bloody thing, Wayne!
263
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:53,978
As I was saying,
264
00:14:54,059 --> 00:14:57,399
your father did all he could,
but a girl just needs her mother.
265
00:14:57,479 --> 00:14:58,309
I know.
266
00:14:58,397 --> 00:15:00,977
Man, you have no idea
how much I've missed you.
267
00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:03,526
I am so glad to have you back.
268
00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:06,111
And I'm not going anywhere
without you, Bean.
269
00:15:06,196 --> 00:15:07,356
Remember that.
270
00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:23,129
[slurring] Hey, hey, Bunty,
can you steer my stumbles
271
00:15:23,213 --> 00:15:24,383
in the direction of the bed?
272
00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:26,585
I just need... Is... I know...
273
00:15:26,675 --> 00:15:30,255
All right, I know you're still in shock
that my mom is back.
274
00:15:30,346 --> 00:15:33,766
I'm in shock, too. I mean, it is shocking.
275
00:15:33,849 --> 00:15:35,729
It is shocking.
276
00:15:35,809 --> 00:15:37,769
But, hey, hey, hey, Bunts...
277
00:15:37,853 --> 00:15:43,073
Here's the thing.
Here's the positive thing here,
278
00:15:43,150 --> 00:15:45,030
is you won't have to do as much
279
00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:47,360
'cause she'll be here
to hold my hair back and stuff.
280
00:15:47,446 --> 00:15:49,236
You know? You know what I mean?
281
00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:50,695
Bunts?
282
00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:52,870
What are you doing?
283
00:15:54,244 --> 00:15:55,544
[gasps]
284
00:15:55,621 --> 00:15:57,751
Oh, man. Oh, man!
285
00:15:57,831 --> 00:15:59,751
You gotta help me! Please!
286
00:15:59,833 --> 00:16:02,383
Bunty has been turned to stone,
and I just...
287
00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:04,171
Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
288
00:16:04,254 --> 00:16:05,304
[gasps]
289
00:16:08,884 --> 00:16:11,184
[screaming]
290
00:16:13,097 --> 00:16:15,807
We have to do something. Now!
291
00:16:15,891 --> 00:16:17,641
Any one of us could be next.
292
00:16:17,726 --> 00:16:20,266
Women aren't permitted
to address the council.
293
00:16:20,354 --> 00:16:22,234
But you're the only one in here!
294
00:16:22,314 --> 00:16:23,574
Then it's unanimous.
295
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,229
Shut up, will ya?
296
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:28,737
Ah, I should've done something earlier,
but now, I got no choice.
297
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:30,491
I have to take action.
298
00:16:30,572 --> 00:16:31,872
I hate action!
299
00:16:31,949 --> 00:16:33,579
But against whom, sire?
300
00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:34,909
It's gotta be Oona.
301
00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:38,294
She's finally snapped
after years of us being dicks to her.
302
00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:40,082
Any attack against Queen Oona
303
00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:42,875
would be seen as an act of war
on Dankmire.
304
00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:46,260
A war you'd have to fight
with most of your cabinet turned to stone.
305
00:16:46,338 --> 00:16:49,048
Zog was the greatest warrior
Dreamland has ever seen.
306
00:16:49,133 --> 00:16:51,263
You dare question his fitness for battle?
307
00:16:51,343 --> 00:16:52,303
Not at all.
308
00:16:52,386 --> 00:16:55,426
Only the wisdom of proceeding
without a strategy for--
309
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:56,934
My clothes are really heavy.
310
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:59,596
Can we have this conversation
sitting down?
311
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:02,345
[sighs] You know what? Never mind.
312
00:17:02,438 --> 00:17:05,228
Zoggy, you have to.
Before she comes after one of us.
313
00:17:05,315 --> 00:17:08,605
We can't let our family
be ripped apart again.
314
00:17:12,114 --> 00:17:13,744
[Derek] "More tea, General?"
315
00:17:13,824 --> 00:17:15,744
"Why, certainly, my good man."
316
00:17:17,202 --> 00:17:20,712
Father! To what do I owe
the pleasure of this visit?
317
00:17:20,789 --> 00:17:22,919
So, listen, son.
318
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:27,210
Your mother and I,
we've been having some, um...
319
00:17:27,296 --> 00:17:28,956
difficulties lately,
320
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:32,758
and I'd like to lock you in the tower
until we sort things out.
321
00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:35,393
All right. But you'll come get me later?
322
00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:39,641
Sure. Once we work things out,
whoever survives will come and get you.
323
00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:43,645
Okay, but I'm still having nightmares
about that big skillet.
324
00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:46,186
We couldn't find Oona anywhere, sire.
325
00:17:46,273 --> 00:17:48,783
I'm afraid we made the mistake
of trusting her.
326
00:17:48,859 --> 00:17:51,449
She could get any of us at any moment.
327
00:17:51,528 --> 00:17:53,408
We gotta split up and search for her.
328
00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:55,699
Hmm, I have a better idea.
329
00:17:56,325 --> 00:17:58,865
Go ahead, sire.
Don't ask about my fourth eye!
330
00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:03,915
Almighty ball, is Oona still in Dreamland?
331
00:18:05,167 --> 00:18:06,917
-"Yes."
-[all gasp]
332
00:18:07,002 --> 00:18:09,382
Wait, its answers are often cryptic. Is Queen Oona in the castle?
333
00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:14,798
"The danger is near."
334
00:18:15,302 --> 00:18:16,262
Let me try.
335
00:18:16,345 --> 00:18:17,675
Where is--
336
00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:19,013
[screams]
337
00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:21,098
Enough! No more time for parlor tricks.
338
00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:23,603
We've got to protect ourselves.
I'll watch Bean.
339
00:18:23,685 --> 00:18:25,265
And we'll track down Oona.
340
00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:29,654
I'll use my skills as a hunter
and Odval will use his diplomacy
341
00:18:29,733 --> 00:18:31,743
to stab her with a broom handle.
342
00:18:36,949 --> 00:18:39,409
Follow me, darling.
We'll be completely safe up here.
343
00:18:39,993 --> 00:18:42,833
Wow. Does Dad even know about this room?
344
00:18:42,913 --> 00:18:44,673
No. It's called the library.
345
00:18:51,797 --> 00:18:54,677
Huh. So, what was going on here?
346
00:18:55,926 --> 00:18:57,006
Neat trick.
347
00:18:58,262 --> 00:18:59,392
Then what happened?
348
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:01,182
[tape rewinds]
349
00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:04,849
Let me try. Where is--
350
00:19:04,935 --> 00:19:06,015
[screams]
351
00:19:06,103 --> 00:19:07,353
Whoa.
352
00:19:07,437 --> 00:19:09,607
Can we try running it back
a little further?
353
00:19:09,690 --> 00:19:12,280
Actually, a lot further?
354
00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:13,439
[tape rewinds]
355
00:19:21,785 --> 00:19:24,655
You can rest easy now
and get some fresh air.
356
00:19:24,746 --> 00:19:26,746
I used to spend many nights up here,
357
00:19:26,832 --> 00:19:29,502
watching the stars, the moon,
the neighbors.
358
00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:32,915
Mom? That's never happened before,
the thing with my fingers... As you reach maturity,
you will notice many more changes.
359
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:39,085
Duh. I already know.
360
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:40,598
This isn't a sex talk.
361
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:43,680
Oh. What kind of talk is it?
362
00:19:43,765 --> 00:19:46,935
There are some things you need to know
about yourself, Bean.
363
00:20:10,417 --> 00:20:11,247
Oh, my!
364
00:20:16,673 --> 00:20:18,723
[Zog] The old castle mental ward.
365
00:20:20,969 --> 00:20:22,549
[Odval] Someone left the door open.
366
00:20:26,183 --> 00:20:27,643
-Hey.
-[both scream]
367
00:20:28,227 --> 00:20:31,267
Oona, is that you?
I missed you so much, baby.
368
00:20:31,355 --> 00:20:32,805
Quick, Odval, stab her in the neck!
369
00:20:32,898 --> 00:20:34,688
[chuckles] Calm down.
370
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:37,859
I've got something real for you
to freak out about.
371
00:20:38,862 --> 00:20:42,322
Dude, the truth has been
right under your nose the whole time,
372
00:20:42,407 --> 00:20:43,987
but you were too in love to see it.
373
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:45,446
Show us what happened here.
374
00:20:45,994 --> 00:20:48,374
Okay, now let's take it back
about 15 years.
375
00:20:48,455 --> 00:20:49,455
[tape rewinds]
376
00:20:56,421 --> 00:20:58,171
To our little family.
377
00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:05,104
No! Oh, no!
378
00:21:05,180 --> 00:21:08,640
-Please, not her. No!
-[Dagmar] Bean?
379
00:21:09,142 --> 00:21:10,192
Incredible.
380
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,229
It's exactly as I remembered it.
381
00:21:12,312 --> 00:21:15,272
Except, this time, watch from over here.
382
00:21:15,899 --> 00:21:16,899
[tape rewinds]
383
00:21:17,943 --> 00:21:19,823
...but I've brought up a bottle
from the cellar.
384
00:21:19,903 --> 00:21:21,663
The seal is unbroken.
385
00:21:31,415 --> 00:21:32,415
Dagmar?
386
00:21:32,499 --> 00:21:34,459
She poisoned the wine?
387
00:21:34,543 --> 00:21:38,013
But if Bean hadn't switched
the glasses around, I'd be--
388
00:21:38,088 --> 00:21:41,928
Uh-huh. Out there in the garden
with pigeons crapping on your head.
389
00:21:42,009 --> 00:21:43,009
More so than usual.
390
00:21:43,093 --> 00:21:45,973
But I devoted my life to her. I...
391
00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:48,272
How could she?
392
00:21:48,348 --> 00:21:51,728
Looks like she's been keeping
quite a few secrets from you, my man.
393
00:21:51,810 --> 00:21:54,730
[Zog] What the...
A movable knickknack nook?
394
00:21:54,813 --> 00:21:56,063
[growls]
395
00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:59,938
The thing about your father, Tiabeanie,
is that he wants to change you.
396
00:22:00,027 --> 00:22:02,527
I want you as you were born to be.
397
00:22:02,612 --> 00:22:05,662
What was I born to be? Mom?
398
00:22:05,741 --> 00:22:09,331
Damn small print.
This had better be the right one.
399
00:22:09,411 --> 00:22:11,711
[door opens]
400
00:22:12,664 --> 00:22:13,504
Oh!
401
00:22:21,882 --> 00:22:22,842
[Zog] You.
402
00:22:22,924 --> 00:22:25,394
The only woman I ever loved.
403
00:22:25,469 --> 00:22:29,599
Do you know what I did for you?
What I gave up to get you back?
404
00:22:32,893 --> 00:22:36,943
[sighs] Elfo, I just wish I could see you
one last time.
405
00:22:38,231 --> 00:22:39,191
[panting]
406
00:22:39,274 --> 00:22:44,284
You know, we could've just gone
to marriage counseling.
407
00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,283
This goes way beyond you and me, dear.
408
00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:49,945
It is a dark battle of a hundred centuries
and our daughter's destiny.
409
00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:51,745
Not if I can help it.
410
00:22:52,371 --> 00:22:54,121
[Zog grunting]
411
00:22:55,665 --> 00:22:56,575
Come on!
412
00:23:18,563 --> 00:23:21,193
Huh? What is that? Goo?
413
00:23:24,361 --> 00:23:25,201
Yikes!
414
00:23:28,949 --> 00:23:31,989
Summon the army!
This kingdom is under attack!
415
00:23:32,077 --> 00:23:36,997
By a ruthless enemy
who will stop at nothing. My wife!
416
00:23:37,082 --> 00:23:40,792
-[soldier] Which one?
-I do know how to pick 'em, don't I?
417
00:23:43,588 --> 00:23:46,508
[Dagmar] We must go, darling. Quickly.
The attack has begun.
418
00:23:46,591 --> 00:23:48,091
What? Whose attack?
419
00:23:48,176 --> 00:23:52,096
I'm afraid it's Oona.
She is coming for us. For you.
420
00:23:52,180 --> 00:23:53,350
For me?
421
00:23:53,432 --> 00:23:56,772
You, and you alone, are the key
to the future of this kingdom.
422
00:23:56,852 --> 00:23:58,272
All you need is my guidance.
423
00:23:59,020 --> 00:24:00,020
Really?
424
00:24:01,273 --> 00:24:03,443
Sire, we've rallied the troops. Get out. Run! Save yourself.
425
00:24:05,777 --> 00:24:06,607
From what?
426
00:24:06,695 --> 00:24:08,855
[all screaming]
427
00:24:12,284 --> 00:24:13,164
[man] Oh, no.
428
00:24:13,452 --> 00:24:15,292
I should be the one killing everyone.
429
00:24:15,370 --> 00:24:17,160
I should be the one creeping everyone out.
430
00:24:17,247 --> 00:24:19,037
[gasps] You!
431
00:24:19,124 --> 00:24:19,964
-[Luci yelps]
-[pop]
432
00:24:21,626 --> 00:24:23,626
[all screaming]
433
00:24:30,844 --> 00:24:34,474
[stammering] Wait, this is...
this is just... It's a lot.
434
00:24:34,556 --> 00:24:36,676
I know, sweetie. This way.
435
00:24:36,766 --> 00:24:40,146
What did you mean when you said,
"The future of this kingdom"?
436
00:24:40,228 --> 00:24:42,558
Are you saying I'm some kind of hero?
437
00:24:42,647 --> 00:24:45,527
They're such relative terms,
aren't they, darling?
438
00:24:45,609 --> 00:24:48,109
Hero and villain? One step up.
439
00:24:48,195 --> 00:24:50,155
-I didn't say "villain."
-[Dagmar grunts]
440
00:24:51,865 --> 00:24:53,575
[Bean screaming]
441
00:24:57,120 --> 00:24:58,870
Mom, what did you do that for?
442
00:24:58,955 --> 00:25:01,995
It was the only way to get you
to stop talking. Now swim for that ship.
443
00:25:11,510 --> 00:25:14,970
Welcome aboard,
Queen Dagmar and Princess Tiabeanie.
444
00:25:15,055 --> 00:25:18,675
Mom, what are these creatures,
and why are they looking at me that way?
445
00:25:18,767 --> 00:25:23,437
Bean, you have so much to learn
and many wonderful things to see.
446
00:25:23,522 --> 00:25:27,322
Set sail!
For the homeland and a glorious future!
447
00:25:44,417 --> 00:25:45,747
[sighs]
448
00:25:45,961 --> 00:25:50,551
I guess the only bright side is,
now I got nothing left to lose.
449
00:25:50,966 --> 00:25:52,506
[groans]
450
00:25:52,592 --> 00:25:53,762
[splash]
451
00:25:53,843 --> 00:25:57,353
Except the thing that says I'm a king!
452
00:25:57,514 --> 00:26:00,184
Ah, come on!