1 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,925 ‎NETFLIX 原创剧集 2 00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:35,994 ‎先是下起了雨 现在又有人敲门? 3 00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:38,663 ‎今晚对像我们这样的人来说 ‎有点过于刺激了 4 00:00:38,747 --> 00:00:39,748 ‎去瞧瞧是谁 5 00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:41,332 ‎告诉他们我们一文不值 6 00:00:43,918 --> 00:00:45,045 ‎是头野兽 7 00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:46,629 ‎好吧 请进 8 00:00:47,714 --> 00:00:49,424 ‎来吃一碗寡淡无味的糊糊吧 9 00:00:52,844 --> 00:00:55,388 ‎-抱歉 我们尖叫了 ‎-别砸凳子! 10 00:01:09,986 --> 00:01:12,614 ‎天呐!乌娜 你吓了我一大跳 11 00:01:12,697 --> 00:01:14,115 ‎嗯 这种反应我见多了 12 00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:16,951 ‎特比希!你吓死我了! 13 00:01:17,035 --> 00:01:18,995 ‎嗯 这种反应我见多了 14 00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:22,373 ‎昨晚那场老年性爱派对太恐怖了 ‎我还没缓过劲儿来 15 00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:24,584 ‎有好多松弛下垂的肉体 16 00:01:24,667 --> 00:01:27,921 ‎你错过了意外加入的马刀舞部分 ‎可刺激了 17 00:01:28,004 --> 00:01:30,548 ‎那一切真的发生过吧? ‎所有人都脱光了衣服? 18 00:01:30,632 --> 00:01:32,342 ‎包括我 还有你… 19 00:01:32,425 --> 00:01:34,135 ‎天呐 还有你 特比希? 20 00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:35,053 ‎可好玩了 21 00:01:35,136 --> 00:01:36,513 ‎滚开! 22 00:01:36,596 --> 00:01:39,015 ‎爸爸全都看见了 我们把他逼疯了 23 00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:41,101 ‎我简直尴尬到无地自容 24 00:01:41,184 --> 00:01:43,478 ‎不用觉得羞耻 你的小翘臀很性感 25 00:01:43,561 --> 00:01:44,395 ‎别说了! 26 00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:48,066 ‎而且你很幸运 ‎没有继承你爸浓密的红毛 27 00:01:48,149 --> 00:01:49,359 ‎她说得对 知道吗? 28 00:01:49,442 --> 00:01:51,027 ‎特比希!快滚! 29 00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:55,532 ‎天啊 梦之国有麻烦了 ‎我们必须做点什么… 30 00:01:55,615 --> 00:01:57,659 ‎特比希!我听到你的呼吸声了 31 00:01:57,742 --> 00:01:59,327 ‎好吧 保证不会了 32 00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:02,413 ‎憋气太难了 33 00:02:02,497 --> 00:02:03,498 ‎你给我走开 34 00:02:03,581 --> 00:02:05,291 ‎那我走了哦 再见 35 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:06,626 ‎-再见 ‎-再见 36 00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:08,294 ‎你听 37 00:02:09,670 --> 00:02:12,382 ‎很好 他在嚎叫 ‎这样总好过大声尖叫吧 38 00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:14,759 ‎(禁止噪音) 39 00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:16,386 ‎安静地宣布 40 00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:20,056 ‎海盗女王乌娜和蒂亚碧妮公主驾到 41 00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:23,893 ‎以免激怒国王脆弱的玻璃心 42 00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:25,812 ‎你说什么? 43 00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:30,191 ‎我刚才说 你的性感前妻乌娜 ‎和你混乱的女儿小碧来了! 44 00:02:32,026 --> 00:02:32,986 ‎可怜的索格 45 00:02:33,069 --> 00:02:35,446 ‎被这样捆着 ‎活像一大块汗津津的烤肉 46 00:02:35,530 --> 00:02:37,157 ‎再来点炸薯球怎么样? 47 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,741 ‎再搭配一点豆角? 48 00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:42,745 ‎天啊 你们能至少尊重一下我爸吗? 49 00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:43,955 ‎他可是我们的国王啊 50 00:02:44,038 --> 00:02:49,002 ‎是 当然 公主 ‎我们会无比尊敬地对待索格 51 00:02:49,878 --> 00:02:51,546 ‎直到再没有那个必要 52 00:02:51,629 --> 00:02:52,755 ‎你这话什么意思? 53 00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:54,507 ‎没什么 没有任何意思 54 00:02:54,591 --> 00:02:55,758 ‎没有需要你操心的意思 55 00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,260 ‎这话又是什么意思? 56 00:02:57,343 --> 00:03:00,638 ‎拜托 蒂亚碧妮 你可以相信我们 57 00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:01,723 ‎眨眼睛 58 00:03:02,640 --> 00:03:05,268 ‎嘿 乌娜 你觉得我应该先揍谁? 59 00:03:05,351 --> 00:03:09,731 ‎冷静 小碧 ‎梦之国现在需要一个稳重的领导者 60 00:03:09,814 --> 00:03:11,191 ‎-和一支新军 ‎-什么? 61 00:03:11,274 --> 00:03:13,401 ‎艾弗昨晚吓跑了所有新招募的士兵 62 00:03:13,484 --> 00:03:15,737 ‎因为他们看见 ‎他在月光下搞扇屁屁仪式 63 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:17,822 ‎什么?你看见了? 64 00:03:17,906 --> 00:03:19,616 ‎对 我们都看见了 艾弗 65 00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:21,451 ‎而且那画面绝对永生难忘 66 00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:23,661 ‎我们只剩12支箭了 67 00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:26,289 ‎我们一直在瞄准海鸥 但总是射偏 68 00:03:26,372 --> 00:03:27,207 ‎特比希! 69 00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:31,461 ‎小碧 我来照顾发疯的索格宝贝 ‎你来照顾这个发疯的国家 70 00:03:32,253 --> 00:03:35,381 ‎一切都会好起来的 71 00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:38,218 ‎别再嚎叫了 72 00:03:38,301 --> 00:03:40,553 ‎不 不要再嚎叫了 73 00:03:41,429 --> 00:03:44,807 ‎嚎叫退散 拜拜 嚎叫 74 00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:46,893 ‎再不要嚎叫 75 00:03:52,106 --> 00:03:56,986 ‎现在 大家踮着脚走出去 ‎要像死老鼠一样安静 76 00:03:59,864 --> 00:04:02,617 ‎来了一头野兽 要杀光我们所有人! 77 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:08,122 ‎第28章 嘿 大富豪 78 00:04:22,470 --> 00:04:24,430 ‎好了 头脑简单的乡巴佬们 79 00:04:25,139 --> 00:04:27,016 ‎告诉我这头野兽具体都做了些什么 80 00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:29,769 ‎它用巨大的脚践踏我的玉米地 81 00:04:29,852 --> 00:04:31,896 ‎把奶奶扔到了隔壁王国 82 00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:35,483 ‎在我的食品储藏室横冲直撞 ‎把里面的东西都搞得臭哄哄的 83 00:04:35,566 --> 00:04:37,026 ‎天呐 太脏了 84 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:38,611 ‎它偷了我的黄油 85 00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:39,946 ‎嘿 小碧 86 00:04:40,029 --> 00:04:42,573 ‎你不觉得奇怪吗? ‎那怪物见了什么都吃 87 00:04:42,657 --> 00:04:45,034 ‎却碰都没碰这些肥美多汁的猪? 88 00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:46,869 ‎也许它是洁食主义者? 89 00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:49,205 ‎麦金莫 ‎你在这附近见过一头怪兽吗? 90 00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:52,458 ‎抱歉 我对除我以外的事物 ‎通常视而不见 91 00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:54,836 ‎我们该怎么办 蒂亚碧妮侦探? 92 00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:56,963 ‎我还没想好 93 00:04:57,046 --> 00:04:59,132 ‎那我们就自己解决这件事! 94 00:05:00,591 --> 00:05:02,969 ‎把它的眼珠子一颗颗挖出来 95 00:05:03,052 --> 00:05:04,429 ‎天啊 真好玩 96 00:05:06,180 --> 00:05:07,682 ‎艾弗 路西 站住! 97 00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:10,893 ‎我也想啊 ‎但我的双腿不听使唤 抱歉 小碧 98 00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:12,186 ‎民众已经做出了决定 99 00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:14,689 ‎不!暴力从来不能解决任何问题 100 00:05:14,772 --> 00:05:17,608 ‎除了那次 它解决了所有问题 101 00:05:17,692 --> 00:05:19,235 ‎但只有那一次而已 102 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:21,446 ‎你怎么还在这里?暴民往那边去了 103 00:05:21,529 --> 00:05:23,531 ‎好吧 天啊 104 00:05:23,614 --> 00:05:25,241 ‎-你叫什么名字? ‎-山姆布卡 105 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:28,077 ‎-“珊布卡”? ‎-不是 是“山姆布卡” 106 00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:30,747 ‎姓“布卡” 名“山姆” 107 00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:32,457 ‎-等一下… ‎-怎么了? 108 00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:34,959 ‎-你老婆是丹妮丝吗? ‎-是 咋了? 109 00:05:35,043 --> 00:05:35,877 ‎-布卡? ‎-嗯? 110 00:05:36,461 --> 00:05:38,046 ‎-要开始了 ‎-什么? 111 00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:40,256 ‎我也不想跟你说这件事 112 00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:44,135 ‎但是她在酒吧里偷杯子 113 00:05:44,218 --> 00:05:46,012 ‎哦 好吧 我们的杯子都是这么来的 114 00:05:46,095 --> 00:05:49,390 ‎你们不能从别人的营业场所里偷东西 115 00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:51,059 ‎-你不偷吗? ‎-我不偷 116 00:05:51,142 --> 00:05:53,853 ‎-哦 你不偷杯子 ‎-听着 我… 117 00:05:53,936 --> 00:05:56,230 ‎如果我需要杯子 ‎我会去酒吧 在那里用 118 00:05:56,314 --> 00:05:59,150 ‎回家找丹妮丝去吧 ‎我相信你们可以 那个… 119 00:05:59,734 --> 00:06:01,819 ‎-用杯子喝水? ‎-对 用偷来的杯子 120 00:06:01,903 --> 00:06:05,198 ‎-不是…是 好吧 算了 ‎-好吧 算了 121 00:06:05,281 --> 00:06:07,867 ‎-我得走了 ‎-那个 我…嗯 你该走了 122 00:06:07,950 --> 00:06:09,285 ‎我会告诉丹妮丝 你说了… 123 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,371 ‎不 请不要跟她说关于我的事 124 00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:13,081 ‎但她必须知道 125 00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:15,333 ‎你不是要去加入暴民吗? 126 00:06:15,416 --> 00:06:18,336 ‎是哦 也许吧 再见 127 00:06:18,836 --> 00:06:19,670 ‎什么? 128 00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:22,715 ‎我要去吃点东西 我饿了 129 00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:24,467 ‎你可真是个大侦探 130 00:06:40,983 --> 00:06:42,485 ‎看 它往那边去了! 131 00:06:42,568 --> 00:06:44,195 ‎这家伙真能跑! 132 00:06:44,695 --> 00:06:46,614 ‎怪物总爱往废弃的塔楼跑 133 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:57,291 ‎我们不想杀你 只想用火烧一烧你 134 00:06:57,375 --> 00:07:00,420 ‎住手!怪物也是人啊 135 00:07:00,503 --> 00:07:02,880 ‎不 它们不是 ‎连我们都只能勉强算作是人 136 00:07:02,964 --> 00:07:06,592 ‎好吧 先别烧 ‎等我们弄清楚它是什么再说 137 00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:09,637 ‎太迟了 女士 ‎鲁佛斯已经把城堡点燃了 138 00:07:12,723 --> 00:07:13,891 ‎见鬼 139 00:07:15,726 --> 00:07:19,272 ‎别死在里面 小碧 ‎我现在情绪不够稳定 我伤不起的 140 00:07:19,355 --> 00:07:20,523 ‎还有 把我的小刀还我 141 00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:34,287 ‎你好 嘿 142 00:07:35,037 --> 00:07:36,038 ‎嗨 143 00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:37,415 ‎我是小碧 144 00:07:37,915 --> 00:07:40,543 ‎好吧 看见那边那座破烂城堡了吗? 145 00:07:41,085 --> 00:07:42,211 ‎我就是从那儿来的 146 00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:43,463 ‎不 不是…不是那个 147 00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:46,215 ‎那是迷你高尔夫球场 ‎现在已经没人去了 因为… 148 00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:50,344 ‎算了 好吧 你听我说 ‎我知道现在一切看起来很糟糕 149 00:07:50,428 --> 00:07:53,306 ‎那些乡巴佬逼得你走投无路 ‎塔楼着火了 150 00:07:53,389 --> 00:07:56,559 ‎而我正用这把大匕首对着你的… ‎大概是你的脸吧 151 00:07:56,642 --> 00:07:59,770 ‎如果有必要的话 我会捅你的 ‎但我不想这么做 152 00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:01,230 ‎我想跟你做朋友 153 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:02,482 ‎不管你信不信 154 00:08:02,565 --> 00:08:06,235 ‎我明白被一群白痴活活烧死 ‎是怎样的感受 155 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:09,655 ‎我知道 你很害怕 我也害怕 156 00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:13,451 ‎只要我们彼此保持冷静 ‎谁也不要突然乱动 157 00:08:13,534 --> 00:08:15,411 ‎一切最后都会好的 158 00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:18,414 ‎我们握手言和 ‎然后一起下楼 好不好? 159 00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:20,291 ‎天呐 你着火了!好吧… 160 00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:31,302 ‎麦金莫? 161 00:08:40,477 --> 00:08:42,563 ‎谁都别再伤害他了 他已经很伤了 162 00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:45,399 ‎这不是怪兽 好吗?这是麦金莫王子 163 00:08:47,026 --> 00:08:49,195 ‎你的众多帅哥未婚夫之一 164 00:08:49,278 --> 00:08:52,323 ‎我到哪都能认得出 ‎这对长着酒窝的翘臀 165 00:08:52,406 --> 00:08:53,658 ‎退后 鲁佛斯! 166 00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:57,161 ‎我们抓到他了 我们抓住了怪兽 167 00:08:57,245 --> 00:09:00,540 ‎那不是怪兽 ‎他是山姆布卡 偷杯子的人 168 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,708 ‎杯子失踪之谜… 169 00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:03,834 ‎已经解开了 170 00:09:03,918 --> 00:09:06,671 ‎你在公报私仇 因为你嫉妒丹妮丝 171 00:09:06,754 --> 00:09:08,214 ‎不 我没有公报私仇 172 00:09:08,297 --> 00:09:11,217 ‎都怪这两个白痴 ‎他们是最差劲的后援 173 00:09:11,300 --> 00:09:13,761 ‎我没有军队 梦之国完蛋了! 174 00:09:13,844 --> 00:09:15,888 ‎-丹妮丝说“嗨” ‎-什么? 175 00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:17,431 ‎她说她很“嗨” 176 00:09:17,515 --> 00:09:20,726 ‎她吃了面包霉 特别“嗨” ‎而且不给你吃 177 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,026 ‎你觉得他的预后如何 魔法师? 178 00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:32,238 ‎我不确定“预后”是什么意思 ‎但是你看这个 179 00:09:32,321 --> 00:09:34,991 ‎每次我一捅他 他就会尖叫 180 00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:38,828 ‎可是诅咒呢? ‎你能帮麦金莫回到自己的身体吗? 181 00:09:38,911 --> 00:09:41,247 ‎我好怀念灵活的大拇指 182 00:09:41,330 --> 00:09:44,292 ‎你知道用蹄子自慰有多难吗? 183 00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:45,710 ‎几乎不可能做到! 184 00:09:45,793 --> 00:09:47,712 ‎你是说逆转诅咒吗? 185 00:09:47,795 --> 00:09:51,799 ‎那只有特别强大的巫师才能做到 186 00:09:51,882 --> 00:09:53,134 ‎所以我不行 187 00:09:53,217 --> 00:09:56,137 ‎你是说 ‎我永远只能做一只没用的猪了? 188 00:09:56,220 --> 00:09:58,347 ‎不要啊! 189 00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:02,476 ‎从好的一面来说 ‎我刚教会了人形的你玩这个 你看 190 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:03,477 ‎我弹 191 00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:04,520 ‎很好 192 00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:05,438 ‎我弹! 193 00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:06,355 ‎很好 194 00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:07,773 ‎请住手 195 00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:11,611 ‎我已经够痛苦了 ‎你们还用这些芝士球来恶心我 196 00:10:11,694 --> 00:10:15,072 ‎天啊 你们看 ‎看起来完全像是他在说话! 197 00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:16,782 ‎艾弗 再给他弹一块 198 00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:17,867 ‎我弹 199 00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:19,243 ‎麦金莫 说话 200 00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:22,663 ‎我不知道你想干什么 ‎但我已经受够了这种羞辱 201 00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:26,959 ‎现在 失陪了 ‎我要享用这块偷来的黄油 202 00:10:29,795 --> 00:10:33,215 ‎亲爱的黄油 ‎这世上美好的东西就只有你了 203 00:10:34,133 --> 00:10:36,636 ‎小碧 你说得对 太不可思议了 204 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,430 ‎你有多少那种小零食? 205 00:10:39,513 --> 00:10:41,265 ‎你以为这个袋子里装的是什么? 206 00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:43,976 ‎装好你的芝士球 ‎我们要去班特伍德了 207 00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:02,453 ‎(欢迎来到班特伍德 ‎这里不欢迎你) 208 00:11:02,536 --> 00:11:05,206 ‎抱歉 我们今日不收留难民 209 00:11:05,289 --> 00:11:06,374 ‎其他日子也不收留 210 00:11:06,457 --> 00:11:07,625 ‎当然不了 是啊 211 00:11:07,708 --> 00:11:11,462 ‎其实我是蒂亚碧妮公主 ‎来自伟大的国度 梦之国 212 00:11:11,545 --> 00:11:15,424 ‎我们此行 ‎身负一项重大的机密外交任务 213 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:17,134 ‎坐着那玩意 不可能 214 00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:24,558 ‎天啊 别废话了 215 00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:28,979 ‎马上让我们进城 ‎不然我让你英年早逝 216 00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:31,190 ‎麦金莫王子!请宽恕我 217 00:11:31,273 --> 00:11:33,734 ‎我立刻叫他们按照惯例奏乐欢迎您 218 00:11:42,952 --> 00:11:43,953 ‎腰再弯低一点 219 00:11:44,745 --> 00:11:45,913 ‎再低一点 220 00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:54,505 ‎(真我风味香槟 50块一口) 221 00:11:59,176 --> 00:12:01,512 ‎这城堡没有我想象中的富丽堂皇呢 222 00:12:01,595 --> 00:12:02,972 ‎那是马车库 223 00:12:15,317 --> 00:12:16,861 ‎母后!父王! 224 00:12:16,944 --> 00:12:17,820 ‎还有其他人 225 00:12:17,903 --> 00:12:22,324 ‎我 班特伍德的麦金莫王子 ‎欢迎你们见证我的回归 226 00:12:22,908 --> 00:12:24,285 ‎那是麦金莫? 227 00:12:24,952 --> 00:12:26,454 ‎这回你去拥抱他 228 00:12:38,674 --> 00:12:39,717 ‎今天真是个好日子 229 00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:44,180 ‎麦金莫 我最爱的儿子 ‎因为我原本最爱的儿子死掉了 230 00:12:44,263 --> 00:12:45,389 ‎你回来啦 231 00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:48,601 ‎但是这不可能啊 你被变成了一头猪 232 00:12:48,684 --> 00:12:49,977 ‎我亲眼看见的 你怎么… 233 00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:53,063 ‎是魔法师 我们法力高超的巫师 234 00:12:53,147 --> 00:12:57,401 ‎他把你们的猪儿子麦金莫 ‎变回了原来的身体 235 00:12:58,944 --> 00:13:02,156 ‎我把你们的儿子还回来 ‎不求任何回报 236 00:13:02,656 --> 00:13:06,786 ‎除了…请你们帮一个小忙? 237 00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:07,703 ‎我就说嘛 238 00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:11,081 ‎梦之国需要一大笔钱 现在就要 239 00:13:11,165 --> 00:13:13,709 ‎或许还可以再来点大炮、箭支 ‎外加盾牌和剑 240 00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:15,628 ‎还有那种栓着球的链子叫什么? 241 00:13:15,711 --> 00:13:18,380 ‎你杀了我们一个儿子 242 00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:20,966 ‎把另一个变成了猪 ‎还敢跟我们要拴着球的链子? 243 00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:22,343 ‎我懂你 真的 244 00:13:22,426 --> 00:13:26,472 ‎我在很努力地听你抱怨 ‎但我需要你也听听我们说话 245 00:13:26,555 --> 00:13:30,893 ‎麦金莫王子有话要说 ‎听完之后也许你们会改主意 246 00:13:30,976 --> 00:13:32,019 ‎该你出场了 宝贝儿 247 00:13:32,102 --> 00:13:32,937 ‎我弹 248 00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:39,360 ‎朋友们、敌人们、炮友们 249 00:13:39,443 --> 00:13:43,239 ‎仆人、奉承鬼 ‎奴才、势利眼、马屁精 250 00:13:43,322 --> 00:13:45,825 ‎以及所有班特伍德的臣民 听好了 251 00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:48,994 ‎今天 你们收到了一份 ‎来自天堂的礼物 252 00:13:49,078 --> 00:13:49,912 ‎那就是我 253 00:13:52,039 --> 00:13:52,873 ‎我弹 254 00:13:52,957 --> 00:13:56,544 ‎因为这份礼物 ‎我们欠了一份天大的人情 255 00:13:56,627 --> 00:13:58,045 ‎必须感谢… 256 00:13:58,754 --> 00:14:00,381 ‎-我 ‎-什么? 257 00:14:00,464 --> 00:14:04,343 ‎现在 我宣布麦金莫欢迎会开始 258 00:14:04,426 --> 00:14:07,054 ‎酒吧免费供应啤酒 ‎只要我的零花钱够用 259 00:14:07,137 --> 00:14:08,722 ‎我们来这里不是为了这个 260 00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:17,022 ‎演讲很精彩 261 00:14:17,106 --> 00:14:20,234 ‎现在说说我们此行的目的吧? ‎钱和武器? 262 00:14:20,317 --> 00:14:23,028 ‎再说吧 小碧 等时机合适再说 263 00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:32,037 ‎(雄鸡酒吧) 264 00:14:32,121 --> 00:14:34,248 ‎敬麦金莫王子 265 00:14:34,331 --> 00:14:39,211 ‎英勇无畏的酒鬼 ‎酒桌上千杯不醉的王者 266 00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:41,589 ‎咕嘟喝呀、喝呀、喝 267 00:14:42,089 --> 00:14:42,965 ‎好耶! 268 00:14:43,048 --> 00:14:44,216 ‎真是精彩的表现 269 00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:47,469 ‎-就像以前一样 是吧 小麦? ‎-是啊 270 00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,939 ‎他离开以后被变成了猪 ‎我还以为再也不用这么装模作样了呢 271 00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:00,816 ‎顺带一提 他还是当猪比较好 272 00:15:15,331 --> 00:15:17,833 ‎天啊 他的床在哪里?里面好黑 273 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,084 ‎就在你前面 274 00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:23,297 ‎-就差一点儿 真是个混蛋 ‎-大混蛋 275 00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:27,968 ‎在这个混蛋王国里的所有混蛋中 ‎我觉得最差劲的就是麦金莫 276 00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:28,886 ‎唉 277 00:15:29,511 --> 00:15:30,596 ‎我原谅你 278 00:15:30,679 --> 00:15:33,349 ‎我知道你不是故意让我偷听到的 279 00:15:33,432 --> 00:15:34,433 ‎我是故意的 280 00:15:39,688 --> 00:15:40,606 ‎哥哥老公 281 00:15:40,689 --> 00:15:42,900 ‎是那头我们儿子非常依恋的猪! 282 00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:44,777 ‎真是恶心的生物 283 00:15:44,860 --> 00:15:46,737 ‎什么意思?你是说猪还是我们儿子? 284 00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:53,744 ‎我好伤心 285 00:15:54,995 --> 00:15:58,165 ‎我真的超级超级超级… 286 00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:08,801 ‎伤心 287 00:16:15,224 --> 00:16:17,935 ‎别来烦我 ‎我正在自暴自弃中 我起不来 288 00:16:18,018 --> 00:16:19,561 ‎行了 别自怨自艾了 289 00:16:19,645 --> 00:16:22,648 ‎我们在浪费时间 ‎而且这里的酒水真的很贵 290 00:16:22,731 --> 00:16:25,234 ‎我们必须现在就跟你的父母达成协议 291 00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:26,527 ‎人形麦金莫哪去了? 292 00:16:27,111 --> 00:16:27,945 ‎我不知道 293 00:16:28,028 --> 00:16:30,948 ‎我最后一次见他时 ‎他正在角落里试图骑上自己的影子 294 00:16:31,031 --> 00:16:34,201 ‎他抛弃了我 所有人最终都会抛弃我 295 00:16:34,284 --> 00:16:35,452 ‎我好孤独啊 296 00:16:37,037 --> 00:16:37,913 ‎唉 297 00:16:42,209 --> 00:16:45,045 ‎为什么我居然会认为 ‎麦金莫能帮我们完成计划? 298 00:16:45,129 --> 00:16:46,213 ‎天啊 我真幼稚 299 00:16:46,296 --> 00:16:49,299 ‎要说愚蠢、笨拙、痴呆也行 300 00:16:49,383 --> 00:16:52,928 ‎你不需要那只粉红色的猪 ‎你可以自己去找他爸妈谈 301 00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:57,099 ‎嘿 对呀!我只要装出一副 ‎可悲的单身公主模样就好 302 00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,476 ‎是啊 “装出” 303 00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:04,064 ‎疯了 304 00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:06,650 ‎看 麦金莫在那 305 00:17:06,733 --> 00:17:08,902 ‎可是洛伦佐国王和邦妮王后呢? 306 00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:11,155 ‎妈妈和爸爸?我受够他们了 307 00:17:11,238 --> 00:17:13,073 ‎麦金莫 闭嘴 你这样不是在帮忙 308 00:17:13,156 --> 00:17:14,366 ‎我没想帮忙 309 00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:16,242 ‎而且 我什么也没说 310 00:17:16,326 --> 00:17:17,286 ‎那是谁说的? 311 00:17:17,368 --> 00:17:18,579 ‎是我 312 00:17:19,496 --> 00:17:20,539 ‎什么? 313 00:17:20,622 --> 00:17:21,540 ‎你会说话? 314 00:17:21,623 --> 00:17:24,417 ‎我连做独白都可以呢 蒂亚碧妮公主 315 00:17:24,501 --> 00:17:27,128 ‎曾经 我过着 ‎无忧无虑的野外单身生活 316 00:17:27,212 --> 00:17:29,673 ‎在乡村里放肆地裸奔 317 00:17:29,757 --> 00:17:31,467 ‎而你夺走了这一切 318 00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:34,470 ‎从你把我冲洗干净的那一刻起 ‎我就一直在观察你 319 00:17:34,553 --> 00:17:37,806 ‎渐渐地 我学会了说话 ‎但我还是保持沉默 320 00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:43,228 ‎我静待时机 ‎运用你教会我的那一项技术 321 00:17:43,312 --> 00:17:44,146 ‎从背后捅刀子 322 00:17:46,523 --> 00:17:48,776 ‎欢迎来到我的单人革命 323 00:17:48,859 --> 00:17:50,069 ‎这是一场政变 324 00:17:50,152 --> 00:17:53,113 ‎我已经把所有嘲笑、贬低过我 ‎或者打羽毛球时 325 00:17:53,197 --> 00:17:55,365 ‎打败过我的人 投进了监狱 326 00:17:55,449 --> 00:17:56,909 ‎住在这根管子里的守卫 327 00:17:56,992 --> 00:18:01,705 ‎立刻到王座室来 ‎逮捕公主和她的男宠们 328 00:18:02,206 --> 00:18:03,874 ‎我喜欢这称呼 嘿! 329 00:18:04,374 --> 00:18:05,834 ‎麦金莫 做点什么 330 00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:07,211 ‎我也是这么想 331 00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:12,466 ‎把她带走 332 00:18:12,549 --> 00:18:15,052 ‎什么?我们不是好朋友吗? 333 00:18:15,135 --> 00:18:17,638 ‎我们会互相开玩笑啊! ‎我们有感情的! 334 00:18:17,721 --> 00:18:21,183 ‎而且我们都是爱闯祸的皇室小孩 ‎在找寻真正的自我 335 00:18:21,266 --> 00:18:24,770 ‎要我回心转意 ‎你得跟我滚很多次床单才行 336 00:18:24,853 --> 00:18:25,938 ‎带我走吧 337 00:18:26,021 --> 00:18:28,565 ‎我会把这件事告诉你爸妈的 338 00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:31,944 ‎好啊 请随意 他们在地牢等着你呢 339 00:18:33,195 --> 00:18:36,532 ‎知道吗 麦金莫? ‎我这辈子一直梦想着这一天呢 340 00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:38,742 ‎看见我自己坐在国王的宝座上 341 00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:40,119 ‎统治所有人 342 00:18:40,202 --> 00:18:41,829 ‎消灭我的敌人 343 00:18:41,912 --> 00:18:44,039 ‎脸上挂着灿烂的傻笑 344 00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:45,624 ‎但这是一个孤单的梦想 345 00:18:45,707 --> 00:18:48,252 ‎神奇的是 ‎我也有同样的梦想 麦金莫 346 00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:49,753 ‎-真的吗? ‎-真的 347 00:18:49,837 --> 00:18:52,131 ‎来 我有东西给你 348 00:18:53,090 --> 00:18:54,633 ‎我也有东西给你 349 00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:00,973 ‎麦金莫 350 00:19:01,515 --> 00:19:02,391 ‎麦金莫 351 00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:26,582 ‎如果你当初嫁给了我们那个 352 00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:29,960 ‎被宠坏的、不知感恩的儿子 ‎如今我们就不会被关在地牢里了 353 00:19:30,043 --> 00:19:32,462 ‎抱歉哦 我没有嫁给一只猪 354 00:19:32,546 --> 00:19:34,631 ‎害你们不能对更多可怜的穷人征税了 355 00:19:34,715 --> 00:19:38,177 ‎别跟我耍嘴皮子 ‎你知道那场联姻是为了什么 356 00:19:38,260 --> 00:19:40,345 ‎是啊 为了还清我在酒吧赊的账 357 00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:43,473 ‎年轻人 那跟我们的财富没关系 358 00:19:43,557 --> 00:19:47,102 ‎是为了梦之国的秘密资源 359 00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:48,478 ‎我一定会得到的 360 00:19:48,562 --> 00:19:51,023 ‎洛伦佐想要的东西 没有得不到的 361 00:19:52,149 --> 00:19:54,359 ‎守卫 立刻放我们出去 362 00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:56,445 ‎没门儿 你个贪婪的混蛋 363 00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:04,786 ‎我刚听说了政变的事 364 00:20:04,870 --> 00:20:06,246 ‎身为宫廷巫师 365 00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:09,625 ‎我愿为你们提供 ‎我卑微但绝妙的魔法服务 366 00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:11,585 ‎革命者陛下们 367 00:20:11,668 --> 00:20:14,213 ‎请用我们自封的称号 368 00:20:14,296 --> 00:20:15,923 ‎麦金莫男团 369 00:20:16,506 --> 00:20:17,424 ‎天啊 370 00:20:27,559 --> 00:20:28,435 ‎妈妈? 371 00:20:28,518 --> 00:20:31,813 ‎我可怜的小碧 被一只猪耍了 372 00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:34,650 ‎你难道不知道除了自己 ‎绝不能相信任何人吗? 373 00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:37,277 ‎你的朋友最终都会离你而去 374 00:20:37,361 --> 00:20:39,071 ‎一个也不剩 375 00:20:39,154 --> 00:20:42,491 ‎留下你孤零零一个人 ‎只有我陪在你身后 376 00:20:45,327 --> 00:20:47,329 ‎路西 你不会离开我的 对吗? 377 00:20:47,412 --> 00:20:50,666 ‎不会 只有死亡能将我们分离 ‎小碧宝贝 378 00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:55,295 ‎麦金莫 我决定了 ‎我想再做回一只猪 379 00:20:55,379 --> 00:20:57,839 ‎是吗?你真让我惊讶 380 00:20:57,923 --> 00:21:00,926 ‎是啊 我看到你吃东西 ‎睡觉和洗澡的样子… 381 00:21:01,009 --> 00:21:01,927 ‎好吧 你没有洗澡 382 00:21:02,010 --> 00:21:03,387 ‎我渴望那样的生活 383 00:21:03,470 --> 00:21:06,723 ‎我想再次跟你交换身体 你怎么说? 384 00:21:06,807 --> 00:21:08,809 ‎好吧 这正是我最迫切的愿望 385 00:21:08,892 --> 00:21:10,060 ‎但它是不可能实现的 386 00:21:10,143 --> 00:21:13,730 ‎必须要有一个法力高超的巫师 ‎才能完成这样的咒语 387 00:21:13,814 --> 00:21:15,983 ‎你是指除了魔法师以外的任何人 388 00:21:16,525 --> 00:21:18,193 ‎药水已经准备好了 389 00:21:18,277 --> 00:21:20,237 ‎我抽取了那只来访精灵的血液 390 00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:21,822 ‎天呐 他不停地乱动 391 00:21:21,905 --> 00:21:23,407 ‎我们现在可以把他处理掉了 392 00:21:23,490 --> 00:21:26,034 ‎可怜的艾莫小可爱 ‎总在我们需要时伸出援手 393 00:21:26,118 --> 00:21:28,161 ‎所以我才记住了他的名字 394 00:21:35,335 --> 00:21:37,587 ‎陛下 酷刑室准备好了 395 00:21:37,671 --> 00:21:39,756 ‎酷刑室?太残忍了吧? 396 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:42,843 ‎你的朋友小碧想要钱 ‎那我就把她埋在钱堆里 397 00:21:42,926 --> 00:21:44,553 ‎天啊 真是个混蛋 398 00:21:45,220 --> 00:21:46,430 ‎这玩意开着吗? 399 00:21:47,472 --> 00:21:49,683 ‎好吧 至少他们给了我们一个单间 400 00:21:51,685 --> 00:21:54,563 ‎看 天花板打开了一小块 401 00:21:54,646 --> 00:21:55,731 ‎感觉不妙啊 402 00:21:56,773 --> 00:21:57,691 ‎一枚硬币? 403 00:21:58,650 --> 00:21:59,860 ‎又一枚硬币 404 00:22:03,989 --> 00:22:05,365 ‎我感觉到了某种模式 405 00:22:12,539 --> 00:22:13,707 ‎-艾弗 ‎-干吗? 406 00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:16,251 ‎-闪开一点 ‎-不要 是我先来的 407 00:22:16,752 --> 00:22:19,171 ‎我又不是眼红你被砸 408 00:22:19,254 --> 00:22:20,756 ‎-你快闪… ‎-你就是 409 00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:26,219 ‎嫉妒我了? 410 00:22:26,303 --> 00:22:27,346 ‎完全没有 411 00:22:27,429 --> 00:22:28,805 ‎你显然是 412 00:22:28,889 --> 00:22:30,140 ‎我没有 你都哭出来了 413 00:22:30,223 --> 00:22:31,683 ‎不 才没有 我很享受! 414 00:22:31,767 --> 00:22:34,102 ‎这是我一生中最美好的事 415 00:22:34,186 --> 00:22:36,021 ‎艾弗 闪开啦 416 00:22:36,104 --> 00:22:37,189 ‎救命! 417 00:22:38,482 --> 00:22:40,734 ‎来干一杯吧 敬我们 418 00:22:40,817 --> 00:22:42,986 ‎等一下 那是什么声音? 419 00:22:43,070 --> 00:22:44,029 ‎什么声音? 420 00:22:46,990 --> 00:22:48,533 ‎你知道什么事让我很生气吗? 421 00:22:48,617 --> 00:22:49,659 ‎我们就快死了? 422 00:22:49,743 --> 00:22:51,078 ‎不是 也是 423 00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:54,081 ‎都怪我们相信了那只蠢猪 424 00:22:54,623 --> 00:22:56,166 ‎我居然还把他当朋友 425 00:22:56,708 --> 00:22:57,584 ‎艾弗 426 00:22:57,667 --> 00:23:00,545 ‎知人知面不知心嘛 427 00:23:00,629 --> 00:23:03,131 ‎但我不愿意相信麦金莫会这样对我们 428 00:23:03,715 --> 00:23:05,675 ‎那头蠢猪确实是我们的朋友 429 00:23:06,176 --> 00:23:07,010 ‎什么? 430 00:23:07,094 --> 00:23:08,762 ‎好了 我把音量调低 431 00:23:09,638 --> 00:23:12,724 ‎我们说到哪了?对 说到这里 432 00:23:12,808 --> 00:23:15,727 ‎敬我 敬你 敬我们 433 00:23:16,603 --> 00:23:17,479 ‎“我们”? 434 00:23:18,897 --> 00:23:19,731 ‎我们? 435 00:23:25,821 --> 00:23:28,073 ‎嘿 艾弗 不管你要做什么 闭上嘴 436 00:23:28,156 --> 00:23:29,491 ‎你别命令我… 437 00:23:30,367 --> 00:23:31,243 ‎就让你闭嘴了吧 438 00:23:32,994 --> 00:23:34,329 ‎(酷刑室) 439 00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:36,873 ‎救命啊!我吞下了50块的硬币! 440 00:23:36,957 --> 00:23:38,458 ‎救我 别管艾弗! 441 00:23:39,584 --> 00:23:42,337 ‎我的小猪蹄子什么也干不了 ‎我真没用 442 00:23:42,421 --> 00:23:44,297 ‎我就是只油腻的肥猪 443 00:23:44,965 --> 00:23:46,341 ‎对啦 就这么办 444 00:24:02,399 --> 00:24:03,567 ‎我成英雄了吗? 445 00:24:04,067 --> 00:24:04,901 ‎麦金莫 446 00:24:04,985 --> 00:24:07,070 ‎你真让我失望 447 00:24:07,154 --> 00:24:08,280 ‎我也对你很失望 448 00:24:12,451 --> 00:24:14,911 ‎搞什么 麦金莫? ‎你现在连猪都踢了吗? 449 00:24:14,995 --> 00:24:17,164 ‎没事 小碧!我已经学会怎么滚了 450 00:24:22,419 --> 00:24:23,462 ‎糟了 451 00:24:39,436 --> 00:24:40,520 ‎你好啊 小碧 452 00:24:40,604 --> 00:24:42,481 ‎闭嘴 你这傲慢的混蛋 453 00:24:42,564 --> 00:24:44,357 ‎说得好 我的爱人 454 00:24:44,441 --> 00:24:47,944 ‎你有头脑 我有美貌 ‎真是天造地设的一对 455 00:24:48,028 --> 00:24:50,030 ‎或许我发现你时 你不是个怪物 456 00:24:50,113 --> 00:24:51,740 ‎但我无疑把你变成了怪物 457 00:24:51,823 --> 00:24:53,450 ‎而现在 我不得不杀了你 458 00:24:54,034 --> 00:24:56,328 ‎但现在甩着连枷的人可是我哦 459 00:24:56,411 --> 00:24:57,787 ‎它叫连枷啊 460 00:25:00,499 --> 00:25:01,541 ‎小碧 小心 461 00:25:08,089 --> 00:25:09,925 ‎小碧 你的靴子 462 00:25:10,008 --> 00:25:11,134 ‎不是吧 又来? 463 00:25:13,887 --> 00:25:14,721 ‎真悲惨 464 00:25:14,804 --> 00:25:16,139 ‎真恶心 465 00:25:16,223 --> 00:25:18,350 ‎你们几个!快拉我上去 466 00:25:24,564 --> 00:25:26,566 ‎再快点 特比希!加速! 467 00:25:27,067 --> 00:25:30,070 ‎别了 班特伍德 永别了 468 00:25:30,153 --> 00:25:31,821 ‎对不起 我全搞砸了 469 00:25:31,905 --> 00:25:33,949 ‎不 你救了我们 麦金莫 470 00:25:34,032 --> 00:25:35,492 ‎你虽然是头猪 471 00:25:35,575 --> 00:25:38,036 ‎但你比班特伍德 ‎那些人模人样的混蛋好多了 472 00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:39,246 ‎别忘记这一点 473 00:25:39,329 --> 00:25:40,539 ‎我想你说得对 474 00:25:40,622 --> 00:25:44,376 ‎你或许没有拿到钱 ‎你或许没有拿到武器 475 00:25:44,459 --> 00:25:47,587 ‎但你带着最宝贵的财富逃了出来 476 00:25:47,671 --> 00:25:48,505 ‎那就是我 477 00:25:48,588 --> 00:25:51,091 ‎不过 真该带上那些钱的 478 00:25:55,345 --> 00:25:57,055 ‎现在 我们只需要武器了 479 00:25:57,931 --> 00:25:59,641 ‎我们有箭! 480 00:26:58,283 --> 00:27:03,288 ‎字幕翻译: 覃璇