1 00:00:28,696 --> 00:00:31,114 -I get that they want to be cool. -It's human nature. 2 00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:33,701 But to get to the pool, they have to walk in the hot sun. 3 00:00:33,784 --> 00:00:35,703 -It makes them hotter. -It makes no sense. 4 00:00:35,786 --> 00:00:37,495 It's a giant cascading debacle. 5 00:00:37,580 --> 00:00:39,497 -Belly alert. -Holy moly. 6 00:00:39,581 --> 00:00:42,501 If the point of the activity is to cool off by being in water... 7 00:00:42,584 --> 00:00:44,962 -I like where you're going. -then why not just stay home? 8 00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:46,672 -And take a bath. -Right? 9 00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:48,465 Eh, the logic's impeccable. 10 00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:51,051 - Oh, my God. - Just go naked. 11 00:00:51,134 --> 00:00:53,637 Plus, bath water doesn't contain all those chemicals. 12 00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:55,055 The chlorine, the algaecides. 13 00:00:55,138 --> 00:00:57,766 And the bodily fluids that shall remain nameless. 14 00:00:57,850 --> 00:00:59,768 -Kid pee. -I said they'd remain nameless. 15 00:00:59,852 --> 00:01:02,688 Gallons of kid pee being pumped into this pool as we speak. 16 00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:06,483 -They shouldn't have a drinking fountain. -All that liquid ends up somewhere. 17 00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:08,110 People don't think. 18 00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:09,402 -Uh-oh. Oh, my God. -What? 19 00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:10,613 It's Pat. 20 00:01:22,290 --> 00:01:25,252 - All clear. - This place is a minefield. 21 00:01:25,335 --> 00:01:26,336 - Hi. - Ah! 22 00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,338 It's okay. It's Andrew, and he's got a shirt on. 23 00:01:28,421 --> 00:01:30,215 -Oh, thank God. -Welcome back, Rory. 24 00:01:30,298 --> 00:01:32,467 Oh, I'm not back. I'm just here temporarily. 25 00:01:32,551 --> 00:01:34,052 -That's not what I heard. -It's true. 26 00:01:34,136 --> 00:01:36,805 At the bookstore, all anyone talks about is how you're back. 27 00:01:36,888 --> 00:01:39,099 -Well, I'm not back. -Okay. 28 00:01:40,142 --> 00:01:41,184 Spread the word. 29 00:01:41,268 --> 00:01:44,521 Hey, guys, did you hear? Somebody vandalized the floaty hut. 30 00:01:44,604 --> 00:01:46,690 -Oh, no. -Hinges are bent, lock's jammed, 31 00:01:46,774 --> 00:01:49,943 and the kids are having a fit 'cause they can't get their floaties. 32 00:01:50,027 --> 00:01:51,194 Welcome back, by the way. 33 00:01:51,278 --> 00:01:52,738 -Yeah, I'm not back. -You look back. 34 00:01:52,821 --> 00:01:55,407 Luke donated the money for that hut. He's gonna be upset. 35 00:01:55,490 --> 00:01:57,868 Forget Luke. Steve and Kwan are going postal. 36 00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:58,952 There's two of 'em. 37 00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:01,538 When they get mad, they're like five little Korean people. 38 00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:03,791 They focus all their Korean vitriol on Lane and me. 39 00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:05,667 -Where are they now? -The drinking fountain. 40 00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:06,960 They're going back in the pool. 41 00:02:07,044 --> 00:02:08,211 -Yup. -Figures. 42 00:02:08,295 --> 00:02:10,631 If you see something inflatable, shout it out. 43 00:02:11,006 --> 00:02:13,258 -She looks back to me. -Well, she's not back. 44 00:02:13,676 --> 00:02:15,468 It is hot! 45 00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:17,220 I don't know why we come here. 46 00:02:17,304 --> 00:02:18,889 - Welcome back, Rory. - I'm not back. 47 00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:21,058 - Welcome back, Rory. - I'm not back. 48 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:23,351 - Good to have Rory back. - I know. 49 00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:25,604 It made sense. I was leaning towards chem. 50 00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:27,439 - I just love chem labs. - Me, too. 51 00:02:27,522 --> 00:02:29,733 -Beakers, clamps. -Test-tubes, Bunsen burners. 52 00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:33,236 But I love philosophy, too. Metaphysics? Can't get enough. 53 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:35,822 I once got in trouble for cheating on a metaphysics exam. 54 00:02:35,906 --> 00:02:37,866 I looked into the soul of the boy next to me. 55 00:02:37,950 --> 00:02:40,035 -You took metaphysics? -No, that was Woody Allen. 56 00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:42,705 -Woody Allen took metaphysics? -It's from Annie Hall. 57 00:02:42,788 --> 00:02:45,916 -I only watch German silent films. -Oh, boy, remember that phase. 58 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:49,586 -When did you punch a hole in your nose? -Read the Constitution. 59 00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:52,214 I'm 22. I get to adorn my body as I see fit. 60 00:02:52,297 --> 00:02:54,591 You're right. You're 22. Punch all the holes you want. 61 00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:56,176 -Are you gonna join us? -When I can. 62 00:02:56,259 --> 00:02:58,136 I took some great linguistic courses. 63 00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:01,056 I mean, it's MIT. Noam Chomsky walks the halls. 64 00:03:01,139 --> 00:03:03,350 I met him. Chatted with him, laughed with him. 65 00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:04,768 He's my idol. 66 00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:07,145 Well, to Noam is to love him. 67 00:03:07,771 --> 00:03:10,565 Uh, is this thing on? 68 00:03:10,648 --> 00:03:12,400 -Ooh. -Why're you getting up? 69 00:03:12,484 --> 00:03:13,651 I'm getting extra cheese. 70 00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,320 -I'll get it. I'm up. -I'll get it. 71 00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:19,992 What are you doing this summer before graduate school? 72 00:03:20,075 --> 00:03:21,952 First, I'm traveling with friends. 73 00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:24,287 We're canvassing a few states for pot legalization. 74 00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:26,456 -For what? -It's about civil liberties. 75 00:03:26,539 --> 00:03:29,334 -It happens to be about pot. -You made it sound way less fun. 76 00:03:29,417 --> 00:03:31,211 -Do you smoke pot? -No. 77 00:03:37,175 --> 00:03:39,845 - What are we watching? - Uh, The Returned. 78 00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:41,304 The French Returned? 79 00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:46,309 Blah! 80 00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:47,936 I don't know how long I'll last. 81 00:03:48,020 --> 00:03:50,397 Oh, come on. Take some NoDoz, drink some coffee. 82 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,565 We've got to break this tragic pattern. 83 00:03:52,649 --> 00:03:54,026 -What pattern? -Ugh. 84 00:03:54,109 --> 00:03:56,653 We get through one episode, then half of another, 85 00:03:56,737 --> 00:03:59,281 -then he gets tired and falls asleep. -I'm up at 5:00. 86 00:03:59,364 --> 00:04:01,366 Then, he won't watch again till a week later. 87 00:04:01,450 --> 00:04:04,619 At which point, he's forgotten the first half of the abandoned episode, 88 00:04:04,703 --> 00:04:07,706 and the entire one before that. Then we have to start all over again. 89 00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:09,624 That puts you in binge-watching jail, Luke. 90 00:04:09,707 --> 00:04:11,752 I'll get a lawyer. April, go to law school. 91 00:04:11,835 --> 00:04:12,878 Lawyers are fascists. 92 00:04:12,961 --> 00:04:14,963 Do you remember the first episode we watched? 93 00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:17,257 It's a bunch of French people in a small town. 94 00:04:18,341 --> 00:04:20,593 -And some of them are dead. -Really? 95 00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:21,678 Oh, my God. 96 00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:35,733 Wow. Like a time machine. Is it weird to be back? 97 00:04:35,818 --> 00:04:37,861 -I'm not back. -You're not? 98 00:04:37,945 --> 00:04:41,031 Uh, no. I mean, I'm... I'm here now, but... Never mind. 99 00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:44,617 Oh, hi again. 100 00:04:44,701 --> 00:04:46,619 -So, I totally smoke pot. -I figured. 101 00:04:46,703 --> 00:04:47,788 Don't tell my dad. 102 00:04:47,871 --> 00:04:50,373 I don't think he'd mind. Just don't operate a forklift after. 103 00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:53,460 Right. A forklift. You have an excellent sense of humor. 104 00:04:53,543 --> 00:04:55,754 -Thank you. -I don't have a great sense of humor. 105 00:04:55,838 --> 00:04:57,630 I'm working on it. I bought a joke book. 106 00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:58,799 I think that's good. 107 00:04:58,882 --> 00:05:01,551 It's hard to have a sense of humor in college these days. 108 00:05:04,888 --> 00:05:07,015 -April? -I never met Noam Chomsky. I made it up. 109 00:05:07,099 --> 00:05:08,725 -Oh. -I've only smoked pot once. 110 00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:11,186 -I ate so much cheese after. -That's okay. 111 00:05:11,269 --> 00:05:13,313 I'm still kind of searching. 112 00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:16,191 -Nothing wrong with searching. -I think I'm having an anxiety attack. 113 00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:18,819 --Can I get you something? Water? 114 00:05:18,902 --> 00:05:21,071 -It's just very weird here. -What do you mean? 115 00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:24,657 -Seeing you back in your childhood room. -I am not back. 116 00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:27,535 Oh, it's like a postcard from the real world. 117 00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:31,456 -Maybe we should join Mom and Luke? -My nose ring hurts. 118 00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:34,376 - Hey, get in here! - In a minute! 119 00:05:35,293 --> 00:05:37,712 Oh, my God. "To Noam is to love him." I just got that. 120 00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:43,051 April's having a freak out. 121 00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:45,803 -What? April! -No, it's okay. Rory's got it. 122 00:05:45,888 --> 00:05:48,515 She looks so grown up, but she is still a kid. 123 00:05:48,598 --> 00:05:52,018 -She wants Rory to take her nose ring out. -I'll take it out. I hate that thing. 124 00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:54,437 She wants to go to Germany this summer. Did I tell you? 125 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:56,106 She does like German cinema. 126 00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:58,858 She's staying with some exchange students she met. 127 00:05:58,942 --> 00:06:01,236 - Hmm. 128 00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:03,530 So where would the money for Germany come from? 129 00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:05,323 -Me. -Really? 130 00:06:05,407 --> 00:06:07,159 -Where else? -She could get a job. 131 00:06:07,242 --> 00:06:09,119 -I could swing it. -You sure? 132 00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:10,203 Yeah. 133 00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:14,165 She only got a partial scholarship. You had to make up the difference. 134 00:06:14,249 --> 00:06:16,543 Now, if she's going to grad school, I mean... 135 00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:20,213 -maybe I could chip in a little-- -I got it. 136 00:06:20,297 --> 00:06:21,548 Okay. 137 00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:24,051 April's mine. I got it. 138 00:06:24,134 --> 00:06:26,219 --All right. You got it. 139 00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:31,934 Rory's showing her the stress tap dancing videos. 140 00:06:32,017 --> 00:06:33,768 God bless that girl. 141 00:06:40,733 --> 00:06:43,528 - Ace, hi. - I wake you up? 142 00:06:43,611 --> 00:06:44,904 I wish. 143 00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:47,449 I've been on the phone with the company rep in China. 144 00:06:47,532 --> 00:06:49,242 I couldn't get the guy to talk slower. 145 00:06:49,326 --> 00:06:51,077 -The time zones are killing me. -Mm-hmm. 146 00:06:51,161 --> 00:06:53,788 Why can't it be the same time everywhere? Time zones suck. 147 00:06:53,871 --> 00:06:56,583 Yeah, they do. They do suck. 148 00:06:57,625 --> 00:07:00,503 - You okay? - I'm fine... I guess. 149 00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:03,631 I don't know. I'm in a weird mood. 150 00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:05,050 -Anything I can help with? -No. 151 00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:06,801 Yes. Uh-- 152 00:07:06,884 --> 00:07:10,180 Hey, I know I'm coming out in a couple weeks, but-- 153 00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:11,806 Oh, come on, don't cancel on me now. 154 00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:14,017 I've got Matilda tickets, planned pony rides, 155 00:07:14,101 --> 00:07:15,685 there's a freak show in town. 156 00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:18,563 No, not canceling. I just thought... 157 00:07:18,646 --> 00:07:21,441 Well, I'm not really doing much of anything these days, 158 00:07:21,524 --> 00:07:24,361 and I'm a little bored, and I thought maybe I'd come out sooner. 159 00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:25,988 -Like tomorrow. -Oh. 160 00:07:26,071 --> 00:07:27,322 Is that okay? 161 00:07:27,405 --> 00:07:29,783 Uh, sure. Yes, let's do it this week. 162 00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:31,701 We'll make it special. Your favorite place, 163 00:07:31,784 --> 00:07:33,411 The Dorchester or the Savoy. 164 00:07:33,495 --> 00:07:36,289 -I'd have to stay in a hotel? -Well... 165 00:07:37,749 --> 00:07:39,209 She's in town? 166 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:41,211 Yes. 167 00:07:42,045 --> 00:07:43,380 For how long? 168 00:07:47,259 --> 00:07:48,468 She's moved in? 169 00:07:50,053 --> 00:07:51,138 Yes. 170 00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:53,390 When? 171 00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:55,475 -Couple of weeks ago. -Okay. 172 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:58,686 -Were you gonna tell me? -Of course I was. 173 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:02,816 So now you want me to just wait in a hotel until you can slip away and come see me? 174 00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:05,068 -No. -Like I'm a geisha? 175 00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:07,570 -Come on, that's not fair. -I know. 176 00:08:07,654 --> 00:08:10,198 I knew about Odette. I just... 177 00:08:10,281 --> 00:08:12,117 Like a hotel... It's just weird. 178 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,743 It doesn't have to be. 179 00:08:14,744 --> 00:08:16,997 Look, can't we just keep the plans the same? 180 00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:21,293 Come out in three weeks, and we will figure it all out then. 181 00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:24,212 Please? 182 00:08:24,796 --> 00:08:25,672 Rory? 183 00:08:26,423 --> 00:08:28,591 Okay. Yeah, a few weeks. 184 00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:30,218 I'm looking forward to it. 185 00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:32,137 Yeah. Me, too. 186 00:08:38,893 --> 00:08:40,853 Oh, my God. Feel that. 187 00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:42,564 - Feel what? - It's not sweltering. 188 00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:46,359 They finally got air-conditioning. We don't have to sweat like pigs anymore. 189 00:08:46,443 --> 00:08:47,569 Except Kirk's pig. 190 00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:50,530 -Hey, kiddo. I forgot to say welcome back. -I'm not back. 191 00:08:50,613 --> 00:08:52,574 Welcome back. Always knew you'd be back. 192 00:08:52,657 --> 00:08:54,451 You were wrong, Bootsy, because I'm not back. 193 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,494 -You look back to me. -Welcome back, Rory. 194 00:08:56,578 --> 00:08:59,622 -Compare notes, people. Please. -Are you digging this air? 195 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,749 First summer my pits aren't sticking like duct tape. 196 00:09:01,833 --> 00:09:02,834 It's fantastic. 197 00:09:02,917 --> 00:09:05,962 -You know about the Thirtysomething Gang? -No, what's that? 198 00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:08,005 It's a group of kids, all about your age. 199 00:09:08,089 --> 00:09:10,133 They've been to college, then out in the real world, 200 00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:11,968 and it spit 'em out like a piece of gum. 201 00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:14,512 Now they're all back in their old rooms, like you. 202 00:09:14,596 --> 00:09:16,723 -I'm not back. -They all hang out together. 203 00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:18,308 That's them there. 204 00:09:20,477 --> 00:09:24,731 So dig out your shoes and ball, 'cause tomorrow you're all goin' bowlin'. 205 00:09:24,814 --> 00:09:26,441 I don't have a ball or shoes. 206 00:09:26,524 --> 00:09:28,359 Did you know about the Thirtysomething Gang? 207 00:09:28,443 --> 00:09:30,612 Yeah, everyone does. Hey, guys! 208 00:09:32,114 --> 00:09:33,198 Don't encourage this. 209 00:09:33,281 --> 00:09:36,909 All right, everyone, settle in, please. 210 00:09:36,993 --> 00:09:40,080 Hope you're all enjoying the nice, cool air in here. 211 00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:44,334 And I hope you'll enjoy the announcement I get to make tonight. 212 00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:46,461 -Sounds exciting. -Hit us with it, Taylor. 213 00:09:46,544 --> 00:09:48,963 Ladies and gentlemen, Stars Hollow is going to-- 214 00:09:50,047 --> 00:09:51,341 What the hell is that? 215 00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:52,717 -What? -The hell is that? 216 00:09:52,801 --> 00:09:55,804 -I don't know what you're saying! -It's the air conditioner! 217 00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:56,888 That, I heard. 218 00:09:56,971 --> 00:09:59,390 -It feels like an earthquake! -Strawberry shortcake? 219 00:09:59,474 --> 00:10:01,476 -What? -Something about strawberry shortcake? 220 00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:04,854 -Taylor, shut it off! -Now I'm hungry for strawberry shortcake! 221 00:10:04,937 --> 00:10:07,023 I can't! It turns on and off by itself! 222 00:10:07,107 --> 00:10:09,401 This is gonna freak out the Thirtysomething Gang! 223 00:10:09,484 --> 00:10:10,735 They're very sensitive! 224 00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:15,490 Might need a little adjustment. 225 00:10:16,533 --> 00:10:19,869 Back to my announcement, people. But first, a little backstory. 226 00:10:19,952 --> 00:10:22,038 Our summer tourist numbers are down. 227 00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:24,207 Even at the pool, revenues are off, 228 00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:27,043 which I attribute to the recent criminal activity 229 00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:28,586 involving the floaty hut. 230 00:10:28,670 --> 00:10:30,588 What happened to my floaty hut? 231 00:10:30,672 --> 00:10:32,924 I thought you didn't want people to know you donated it. 232 00:10:33,007 --> 00:10:34,801 I don't, but it's my floaty hut. 233 00:10:34,884 --> 00:10:38,971 Our Lazy Hazy Crazy Days of Summer event is coming up, and that'll help, 234 00:10:39,055 --> 00:10:41,849 but we thought a supersized event 235 00:10:41,933 --> 00:10:45,603 would generate fresh enthusiasm for tourists to visit. 236 00:10:45,687 --> 00:10:51,401 - Therefore, I am pleased to announce... - The Musical! 237 00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,570 -I love that! -Sounds fun. 238 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:57,282 This will be an enchanting musical history of Stars Hollow. 239 00:10:57,365 --> 00:10:59,826 Book and lyrics by, uh, yours truly. 240 00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:03,330 Music by a very talented young composer. 241 00:11:03,413 --> 00:11:04,706 He once lived in Brooklyn. 242 00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:06,499 --Nat Compton. 243 00:11:06,583 --> 00:11:09,085 That's Nat sitting at the end of the first row. 244 00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:10,420 He'll be directing, as well. 245 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:12,755 - Let's give him a nice hand. 246 00:11:14,131 --> 00:11:16,343 Whoa, give him a crystal sword, he's a White Walker. 247 00:11:16,426 --> 00:11:19,095 Our biggest hurdle will be finding our leading lady. 248 00:11:19,178 --> 00:11:22,932 She's got to be a great singer, a terrific actress, 249 00:11:23,016 --> 00:11:25,643 a nimble dancer, a dexterous whittler. 250 00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:27,229 -She has to whittle? -Or fake it. 251 00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:28,771 How do you fake whittling? 252 00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:31,566 Yeah, they'd see there's no shavings coming off the wood. 253 00:11:31,649 --> 00:11:33,776 Come on, Taylor, production values matter. 254 00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:37,614 Now, what I need from you tonight are volunteers 255 00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:39,782 for the musical's advisory committee. 256 00:11:39,866 --> 00:11:43,160 You'll come to a couple of the shows, and give us any ideas 257 00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:46,789 that will help make it all that it can be. Who's in? 258 00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:49,709 -It sounds fun. -What does? 259 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:52,003 The advisory committee. I'm gonna volunteer for it. 260 00:11:52,086 --> 00:11:54,171 -You think you got the time? -8:30. 261 00:11:54,256 --> 00:11:56,674 -He asked you if you have the time! -I gave it to him! 262 00:11:56,758 --> 00:11:58,385 -For the committee! -I'll make time. 263 00:11:58,468 --> 00:12:01,388 -I'm gonna sign up, too! -Babette, please, warn us! 264 00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:03,806 -I think it sounds fun. -It sounds really fun. 265 00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:06,809 I just hope the show is as successful as Taylor needs it to be! 266 00:12:06,893 --> 00:12:08,520 Once again, warn us. 267 00:12:08,603 --> 00:12:10,229 It's really got to pack 'em in! 268 00:12:10,313 --> 00:12:12,399 If Taylor really wanted to pack 'em in, 269 00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:14,817 he should get up on that stage and dance around 270 00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:17,028 --in his floppy Taylor underpants. 271 00:12:20,657 --> 00:12:22,909 Was so out of context. 272 00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:26,078 So, who's up for being on the advisory committee? 273 00:12:26,162 --> 00:12:27,497 -Me. -Me, too. 274 00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:30,583 -I'll do it. -So, uh, Lorelai, Tom and Sophie. 275 00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:31,709 I'm there, Taylor. 276 00:12:31,793 --> 00:12:33,711 -I can make it work. -Me, too. 277 00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:36,673 Well, I'm loving the community spirit here. 278 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,342 Um, schedules to be announced. 279 00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:42,261 Uh, now, our last issue, people. 280 00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:44,597 This unfortunately is... less pleasant. 281 00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:46,766 So, we're back to the floaty hut? 282 00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:48,893 Who gives a crap about the floaty hut? 283 00:12:48,976 --> 00:12:50,520 I don't. I'm just curious. 284 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,730 If you're so curious, why don't you marry it? 285 00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:56,609 --After 89 years of continual operation, 286 00:12:56,693 --> 00:12:59,195 the Stars Hollow Gazette is shutting down. 287 00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:01,448 -Are you kidding? -I'm gonna miss the coupons. 288 00:13:01,531 --> 00:13:04,784 -I'm gonna miss the poem on the front. -Yeah, the seasonal poem. 289 00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:06,578 Why is it shutting down, Taylor? Money? 290 00:13:06,661 --> 00:13:09,080 No, it was still operating in the black. 291 00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:11,165 But the paper's editor, Bernie Roundbottom-- 292 00:13:13,292 --> 00:13:14,336 Come on. 293 00:13:14,419 --> 00:13:18,465 Bernie retired as editor, and there's no one to take his place. 294 00:13:18,548 --> 00:13:20,132 -Oh, well. -It had a good run. 295 00:13:20,216 --> 00:13:21,801 Eighty-nine years, not bad. 296 00:13:21,884 --> 00:13:24,554 Really? Am I the only one who's in shock over this news? 297 00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:28,475 Well, I had discussed the possibility of the Gazette shutting down 298 00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:30,477 at an earlier meeting, before you were back. 299 00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:31,603 I'm not back. 300 00:13:31,686 --> 00:13:35,189 I figured the Thirtysomething Gang would've filled you in by now. 301 00:13:35,272 --> 00:13:36,733 I don't hang out with them. 302 00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:39,736 So, unless there's other business anybody wants to bring up... 303 00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,696 What about the floaty hut? 304 00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:43,155 Really, get a room. 305 00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:46,117 What about it? It is broken and down for the season. 306 00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:47,910 Did they find the bums who broke it? 307 00:13:47,994 --> 00:13:50,621 I wonder what Luke and the floaty hut's kids are gonna look like. 308 00:13:50,705 --> 00:13:51,998 --Shut up. 309 00:13:52,081 --> 00:13:54,876 Excuse me... Um, excuse me, everybody... 310 00:13:56,711 --> 00:13:59,130 Uh, most everybody... 311 00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:02,884 I gotta say, just shutting down the Stars Hollow Gazette like this, 312 00:14:02,967 --> 00:14:05,219 with all its tradition and history, 313 00:14:05,302 --> 00:14:07,847 without even putting up the tiniest fight, it just seems... 314 00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:19,901 --...wrong. 315 00:14:21,444 --> 00:14:24,071 They're still closing. Have a good night, people! 316 00:14:24,155 --> 00:14:26,157 Wait. What about my floaty hut? 317 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:28,576 -It's waiting in bed for you. -Shut up, Bootsy. 318 00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:31,037 -I think your anonymous cover's blown. -Then screw it. 319 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:33,790 If no one else gives a damn about it, then I don't either. 320 00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:34,957 That's the spirit. 321 00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:49,722 My word, but it's sweltering today. 322 00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:52,767 Sultry. That's what it is. Sultry. 323 00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:54,351 Brandon, I'm out. 324 00:14:57,021 --> 00:14:58,064 Thank you, Brandon. 325 00:14:58,648 --> 00:15:00,400 I'm just mad about the boy. 326 00:15:00,483 --> 00:15:03,778 Ah, yes, lots of returning favorites today. 327 00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:07,031 -There's old Butter Butt. -And our good friend, Back Fat Pat. 328 00:15:07,114 --> 00:15:10,535 -Tell me, is he of the Maryland Back Fats? -I believe he is. 329 00:15:10,618 --> 00:15:13,329 - They did a job on that floaty hut. - Is it fixable? 330 00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:15,498 -I'm trying. -Excuse me, Mr. Hasselhoff? 331 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:17,625 I do not wanna talk about the T-shirt. 332 00:15:17,709 --> 00:15:18,835 Then we will not. 333 00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:20,753 A little to the right, Dewey, please. 334 00:15:20,837 --> 00:15:24,799 As the sun moves, Dewey, it would help if you moved the parasol with it. 335 00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:27,218 -Yes, m'lady. -I taught him to call me that. 336 00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:28,886 - You're shameless. 337 00:15:28,970 --> 00:15:30,346 Hey! Yo, yo, yo! 338 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:33,140 No diving off the edge like that! There's rules! 339 00:15:34,141 --> 00:15:36,268 All right, that's it. Everybody out of the pool. 340 00:15:36,352 --> 00:15:39,355 Right now. Come on. Out! Let's go. 341 00:15:40,231 --> 00:15:42,817 You give a man a lifeguard T-shirt, it goes straight to his head. 342 00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:45,903 I'm sleepy. I think I'll nap, Brandon. 343 00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:47,989 -Yes, Khaleesi. -Ooh, that's good, too. 344 00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:49,491 Night, night. 345 00:15:49,574 --> 00:15:51,200 -Hey, you're back! -I'm not back. 346 00:15:51,283 --> 00:15:53,285 -I'm talking to Michel. -Oh. Hi, Michel. 347 00:15:53,369 --> 00:15:56,914 Hello, Rory. Yes, I got back yesterday. 348 00:15:56,998 --> 00:15:58,875 -How are things at the inn? Good? -Well-- 349 00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,461 Great. Frederick makes me come here and be around kids 350 00:16:01,544 --> 00:16:04,672 so I acclimate to them for when we make our own. 351 00:16:04,756 --> 00:16:05,923 Is that right, "make them"? 352 00:16:06,007 --> 00:16:07,509 -Or have them. -Whatever. 353 00:16:07,592 --> 00:16:11,012 Fatherhood is just going to be a lot of pretending for me. 354 00:16:11,596 --> 00:16:12,930 Okay, bye-bye. 355 00:16:13,848 --> 00:16:15,182 Wow. 356 00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:17,351 He didn't even call to tell me he was back. 357 00:16:17,434 --> 00:16:20,062 -He's French. -It's way more than that. 358 00:16:20,146 --> 00:16:23,775 You know, the Stars Hollow Gazette is the first newspaper I ever read. 359 00:16:23,858 --> 00:16:25,401 -Hmm. -The Gazette. 360 00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,194 My love of words came from that paper. 361 00:16:27,278 --> 00:16:28,488 -Oh, my God. -What? 362 00:16:28,571 --> 00:16:30,698 - Incoming. - Hey, there. 363 00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:32,742 -Hey, Pat. -Oh, hi. Hi, Pat. 364 00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:33,826 Welcome back, Rory. 365 00:16:33,910 --> 00:16:36,496 - Oh, I'm not back, fat... - I mean, back, Pat. 366 00:16:36,579 --> 00:16:39,373 So you're pool people, huh? Never would have taken you for it. 367 00:16:39,456 --> 00:16:41,543 -Oh, you-- -Uh... no. 368 00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:43,670 -Just... sometimes. -Was kinda. 369 00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:44,962 -Well, got to get going. -Okay. 370 00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:47,298 - Okay, see ya, Pat. - See ya. 371 00:16:48,549 --> 00:16:51,260 --It's just so stressful being here. 372 00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:53,555 Dewey? Adjust. 373 00:17:07,318 --> 00:17:08,986 That looks like fun. 374 00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:16,744 Okay, so we got all your info here. 375 00:17:16,828 --> 00:17:19,330 Hang on to your sheet music and knock 'em dead. 376 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:21,541 Hello. 377 00:17:22,166 --> 00:17:24,001 -Hello. -Hi, there. 378 00:17:24,085 --> 00:17:26,587 -Hi, Babette. Hi, Patty. -Shh, we're working here! 379 00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:30,550 So you got your sheet music there, Mr. Tall, Dark and Yowza? 380 00:17:30,633 --> 00:17:32,260 - Yup, all set. - Name's Kevin? 381 00:17:32,343 --> 00:17:36,222 Nice, but I think I'll call you... tomorrow. 382 00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:37,389 Babette, no. 383 00:17:37,974 --> 00:17:39,809 There's the line. Good luck, Kevin. 384 00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:43,479 -Wow, thanks a lot. -Yeah, that was a total clam jam. 385 00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,064 --Don't encourage her. 386 00:17:45,147 --> 00:17:46,899 Go. Go. Scram. 387 00:17:48,610 --> 00:17:50,653 Lorelai! Lorelai! 388 00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:52,321 -Oh, my God. -Do we know her? 389 00:17:52,404 --> 00:17:53,656 Uh, Claudia. 390 00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:55,950 -Oh, my God. Hi! -Hi. 391 00:17:56,033 --> 00:17:57,201 Are you auditioning, too? 392 00:17:57,284 --> 00:18:00,079 Oh, no, I was just passing by with my daughter. 393 00:18:00,162 --> 00:18:03,540 -Is this Rory? -It is. Yes, this is Rory. 394 00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:05,209 Rory, this is Claudia. 395 00:18:05,292 --> 00:18:06,919 -Hello. -My therapist. 396 00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:08,170 Hello! 397 00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:12,091 -Hi. Are you involved in this? -I'm just on the advisory committee. 398 00:18:12,174 --> 00:18:14,301 Can you put in a word for me with the director? 399 00:18:14,385 --> 00:18:16,303 Absolutely. 400 00:18:16,387 --> 00:18:18,514 - Every bit helps. - I guess so. 401 00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:20,057 -Mm-hmm. -So, break something. 402 00:18:20,141 --> 00:18:22,644 --What? 403 00:18:22,727 --> 00:18:24,646 -Isn't she supposed to fix you? -I think so. 404 00:18:24,729 --> 00:18:26,563 - You're totally screwed. - Ugh. 405 00:18:26,648 --> 00:18:29,734 - Oh, I'm on cloud nine. 406 00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:32,236 We've done it. We've found our leading lady. 407 00:18:32,319 --> 00:18:35,406 -That's great, Taylor. -I couldn't believe her résumé. 408 00:18:35,489 --> 00:18:39,535 Credits for days. She sings, she dances, she whittles. 409 00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:42,664 Just look at her. And look at those gams. 410 00:18:42,747 --> 00:18:45,582 She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. 411 00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:47,919 - Present company excepted, right? 412 00:18:48,002 --> 00:18:50,672 No, she's pretty much the hottest woman I've ever seen. 413 00:18:50,755 --> 00:18:52,674 Hmm. And she was Kinky Boots. 414 00:18:53,424 --> 00:18:56,510 -You mean she was in Kinky Boots. -No, no, she played the lead. 415 00:18:56,593 --> 00:18:58,763 - She was Kinky Boots. 416 00:18:58,846 --> 00:19:00,347 But that's not her name. 417 00:19:00,431 --> 00:19:03,309 There was no character named Kinky Boots. I saw the show. 418 00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:05,687 Yes, I saw the show, too. 419 00:19:05,770 --> 00:19:09,106 Now, excuse me, ladies. I've got to get back to work. 420 00:19:11,317 --> 00:19:13,569 Stars Hollow is mounting a big musical, 421 00:19:13,653 --> 00:19:16,030 and no one from the Stars Hollow Gazette is covering it. 422 00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:18,532 And why? Because there is no more Stars Hollow Gazette. 423 00:19:18,615 --> 00:19:20,367 -It stinks. -It stinks? That's it? 424 00:19:20,451 --> 00:19:21,869 The girl was Kinky Boots. 425 00:19:21,953 --> 00:19:24,121 She was in Kinky Boots! Nobody is named Kinky Boots! 426 00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:26,708 -This is not right. -No. I saw the show twice. 427 00:19:26,791 --> 00:19:28,709 The Stars Hollow Gazette cannot just go down. 428 00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:30,837 I mean, it's not Spotlight at the Boston Globe. 429 00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:33,214 It'll never blow the lid off a cabal of buggering priests. 430 00:19:33,297 --> 00:19:35,632 We only have one priest in town. He's a good man. 431 00:19:35,717 --> 00:19:36,926 That's not the Gazette's fault. 432 00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:38,886 -I'll see you back at home. -Go get 'em! 433 00:19:38,970 --> 00:19:41,097 Hey, world, you looking for me? 434 00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:44,475 ♪ Stop your pouting And get to shouting ♪ 435 00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:47,394 ♪ 'Cause Bernie's back today ♪ 436 00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:52,608 ♪ I've been gone so long And you can bet I've got a lot to say ♪ 437 00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:54,026 ♪ Seriously, get comfortable ♪ 438 00:19:56,487 --> 00:19:59,156 Taylor, do not close the Stars Hollow Gazette! 439 00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:01,408 -Huh? What was that? -Khaleesi is speaking. 440 00:20:01,492 --> 00:20:04,036 Bit's over, Brandon. Do not close the Gazette. 441 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:06,664 It's a 90-year-old institution, and it's important to people. 442 00:20:06,747 --> 00:20:08,457 Well, tell that to Bernie Roundbottom. 443 00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:12,128 Marlin fishing in Boca Raton was more meaningful to that ingrate. 444 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,546 Well... all it lacks is an editor, right? 445 00:20:14,630 --> 00:20:17,258 So, someone to steer the ship? I'm your girl! 446 00:20:18,009 --> 00:20:19,969 May I ask what your qualifications are? 447 00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:23,430 -I'm... here. -Well, that's a good start. 448 00:20:23,514 --> 00:20:26,600 I have a degree in journalism from Yale University. How's that? 449 00:20:26,683 --> 00:20:30,938 Not bad, but this job will take you away from the Thirtysomething Gang. 450 00:20:31,022 --> 00:20:32,732 -Have you thought about that? -I'll adjust. 451 00:20:32,815 --> 00:20:35,860 -Should we discuss salary? -I assume it pays nothing? 452 00:20:35,943 --> 00:20:39,655 You got the job. Come, let's go introduce you to the staff. 453 00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:40,948 Lead the way. 454 00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:49,248 Everyone, good news! 455 00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:53,044 We found our editor and the Gazette is saved. 456 00:20:53,127 --> 00:20:54,336 Some of you know her. 457 00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:58,966 Rory Gilmore, graduate of Yale and a professional journalist. 458 00:20:59,050 --> 00:21:00,551 She starts immediately. 459 00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:04,513 Now, it may take her a little time to learn all your names, 460 00:21:04,596 --> 00:21:07,016 but I want you to cooperate with her 461 00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:10,978 and give her 100% of your skills and capabilities, 462 00:21:11,062 --> 00:21:16,275 just as you did Bernie Roundbottom. Please, welcome her to the fold. 463 00:21:17,193 --> 00:21:18,485 Hi, I'm Rory. 464 00:21:19,069 --> 00:21:21,655 - Esther. - Charlie. 465 00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:25,576 Great. Got the names. 466 00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:31,123 We have you in adjoining rooms eight and nine for four nights. 467 00:21:31,207 --> 00:21:33,625 You are confirmed for tonight for dinner at 6:30. 468 00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:37,088 Oh, and please take this. Good for two complimentary cocktails. 469 00:21:37,171 --> 00:21:40,466 -Wonderful. Thanks. -But I do not want to leave anyone out. 470 00:21:40,549 --> 00:21:43,594 Is there anyone little here today? Anyone at all? 471 00:21:43,677 --> 00:21:47,056 - We're little! We're little! - Oh! I did not see you there. 472 00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:50,267 For our special little muppets, complimentary lollipops. 473 00:21:50,351 --> 00:21:51,602 That is, if you like lollipops. 474 00:21:51,685 --> 00:21:52,728 -Yeah! -Oh, boy. 475 00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:57,233 Go ahead, take one each. Now, when I say one, I mean two. 476 00:21:57,316 --> 00:21:58,775 - Oh! - Thank you. 477 00:21:58,859 --> 00:21:59,860 Enjoy your stay. 478 00:21:59,944 --> 00:22:01,445 -Thank you. -Yes. 479 00:22:02,446 --> 00:22:04,448 On a scale of one to ten, 480 00:22:04,531 --> 00:22:06,951 how much did I sound like a child molester? 481 00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:09,703 -Six. -Oh, getting better. Hmm. 482 00:22:10,746 --> 00:22:11,998 -Lorelai. -Yeah? 483 00:22:12,081 --> 00:22:14,125 Did you know I just celebrated a birthday? 484 00:22:14,208 --> 00:22:16,793 -Of course I did. -It was a big one. A milestone. 485 00:22:16,878 --> 00:22:18,670 - Fifty? - Forty. 486 00:22:18,754 --> 00:22:20,756 -I'm not 50. -You're not 40. 487 00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,968 -I'm not 50. -Michel, you weren't 17 when we met. 488 00:22:24,051 --> 00:22:26,303 This is the problem with knowing people a long time. 489 00:22:26,387 --> 00:22:27,596 They can backdate you. 490 00:22:27,679 --> 00:22:30,349 -I'm guessing you're in the middle? -Somewhere, yes. 491 00:22:30,432 --> 00:22:33,852 So, maybe you can take me out for a drink tonight? To celebrate? 492 00:22:33,936 --> 00:22:35,354 -Sure. -And talk? 493 00:22:35,437 --> 00:22:37,273 Yeah, sure. 494 00:22:37,356 --> 00:22:38,440 - Let's talk. 495 00:22:39,358 --> 00:22:42,194 Oh, you must be the Mitchells! We were expecting you. 496 00:22:42,278 --> 00:22:45,948 Oh my, who is that little angel you brought with you? 497 00:22:46,032 --> 00:22:49,660 She looks like she dropped straight down from heaven. 498 00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:53,455 --Hi, come on in. 499 00:22:58,794 --> 00:23:01,713 Welcome to the Secret Bar. What can I get you? 500 00:23:01,797 --> 00:23:03,382 -Uh... -Um... 501 00:23:03,465 --> 00:23:05,676 Gin martini. Cold, dry, twist, please. 502 00:23:05,759 --> 00:23:07,428 Do you have the George Clooney tequila? 503 00:23:07,511 --> 00:23:10,932 The one he enjoys with celebrity friends on his many tequila-filled nights? 504 00:23:11,015 --> 00:23:13,475 -We've got Jose Cuervo. -Does he hang out with George Clooney? 505 00:23:13,559 --> 00:23:16,270 Bring me a shot of Jose, with a little bit of salt on the rim. 506 00:23:16,353 --> 00:23:17,479 -Got it. -Thank you. 507 00:23:22,234 --> 00:23:24,320 Pretty good crowd tonight. 508 00:23:25,112 --> 00:23:27,364 Yes. Very lively. 509 00:23:27,448 --> 00:23:28,907 So... 510 00:23:30,284 --> 00:23:32,619 "My wife is crying upstairs. 511 00:23:32,703 --> 00:23:34,580 I can hear cars coming in the house. 512 00:23:35,581 --> 00:23:39,168 Consigliere of mine, I think it's time you tell your Don 513 00:23:39,251 --> 00:23:41,045 what everyone seems to know." 514 00:23:41,128 --> 00:23:42,921 -What? -It's from The Godfather. 515 00:23:43,005 --> 00:23:46,633 - Oh, not The Godfather again. - It has a quote for every circumstance. 516 00:23:46,717 --> 00:23:48,344 -You don't have a wife. -It's not exact. 517 00:23:48,427 --> 00:23:49,636 -And who's Don? -Michel-- 518 00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:52,098 - I'm leaving. 519 00:23:53,099 --> 00:23:56,352 I'm out of quotes. 520 00:23:57,436 --> 00:23:59,313 I was not just on vacation. 521 00:23:59,897 --> 00:24:01,899 I had a meeting at the W Hotel. 522 00:24:01,983 --> 00:24:02,984 Oh. 523 00:24:03,900 --> 00:24:08,614 Look, with my experience, my skills, my charm, don't laugh-- 524 00:24:08,697 --> 00:24:11,242 -Wasn't laughing. -Doors are open to me. 525 00:24:11,325 --> 00:24:15,704 -Good jobs. High-paying jobs. -I can't say that I'm surprised. 526 00:24:16,122 --> 00:24:18,374 - Thank you. - Thank you. 527 00:24:19,708 --> 00:24:22,044 What I wanted to ask, before it's final, 528 00:24:22,128 --> 00:24:24,463 is there a way we can expand the Dragonfly? 529 00:24:24,546 --> 00:24:28,050 Make it bigger, add a spa. I was born to run a spa. 530 00:24:28,134 --> 00:24:31,178 Michel, I've got a nature preserve on one side, 531 00:24:31,262 --> 00:24:34,515 a fire lane on the other side, protected wetlands on the other side, 532 00:24:34,598 --> 00:24:37,184 and I'm not allowed to put guests in the barn unless they eat oats. 533 00:24:37,268 --> 00:24:41,188 Well, I need more. More to do. More responsibility. More money. 534 00:24:41,272 --> 00:24:43,399 -We have a baby on the way. -You do? 535 00:24:43,482 --> 00:24:47,319 Yeah, I think Frederick ordered one. I have to check. Anyway... 536 00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:50,364 I can't just stay in one place forever. 537 00:24:51,032 --> 00:24:52,158 I know. 538 00:24:52,241 --> 00:24:54,743 I think I need to take that job at the W. 539 00:24:54,827 --> 00:24:56,537 - Five-O! - Five-O! 540 00:25:17,015 --> 00:25:18,267 Clear! 541 00:25:26,775 --> 00:25:28,485 What if I come up with more money for you? 542 00:25:28,569 --> 00:25:31,363 You're overpaying me now. Part of my pay comes out of yours. 543 00:25:32,906 --> 00:25:35,617 You think Michel only sees as far as his own reflection? 544 00:25:35,701 --> 00:25:37,869 I see the books. I need more money. 545 00:25:37,953 --> 00:25:40,456 You need someone you can pay less. Can you deny that? 546 00:25:42,583 --> 00:25:45,336 What are you doing? Is your drink sour? What's going on? 547 00:25:45,419 --> 00:25:48,547 -I'm just trying not to cry. -Lorelai, don't cry. 548 00:25:48,630 --> 00:25:51,675 If you cry, I'll cry. I can't be seen crying at the Secret Bar. 549 00:25:51,759 --> 00:25:54,344 -It's bad enough that I'm here at all. -I'm trying not to. 550 00:25:55,345 --> 00:25:57,890 Lane, this dumb slow song is not helping. 551 00:25:57,973 --> 00:26:00,392 Play something happy and uplifting, please. 552 00:26:06,315 --> 00:26:08,317 It's much better! 553 00:26:12,946 --> 00:26:17,784 I must say, it's been a while since I've felt such energy and excitement 554 00:26:17,868 --> 00:26:20,246 on the floor of the Stars Hollow Gazette newsroom. 555 00:26:20,329 --> 00:26:22,831 Yeah, it's like an Aaron Sorkin movie in here. 556 00:26:22,915 --> 00:26:25,876 Are you not having fun? I think it's important to have fun. 557 00:26:25,959 --> 00:26:27,085 Oh, I'm having fun. 558 00:26:27,169 --> 00:26:29,755 Right now, I'm experiencing the joy of MS-DOS. 559 00:26:29,838 --> 00:26:33,300 Well, if you're confused, Esther here is our computer expert. 560 00:26:33,384 --> 00:26:34,385 - Esther? - Yes? 561 00:26:34,468 --> 00:26:35,886 What do you know about MS-DOS? 562 00:26:35,969 --> 00:26:39,681 -Is that an actor? -No, it's the computer operating system. 563 00:26:39,765 --> 00:26:43,227 I know about it from Halt and Catch Fire, and I didn't watch the show that closely. 564 00:26:43,310 --> 00:26:48,982 Well, I have the instructions here Mr. Roundbottom gave me. Hold on. 565 00:26:52,068 --> 00:26:55,071 "Turn computer on." Did you turn it on? 566 00:26:55,156 --> 00:26:57,073 I did everything but blow in its ear. 567 00:26:57,158 --> 00:27:00,452 "Insert floppy disk." You got your floppy disk? 568 00:27:00,536 --> 00:27:03,164 - Never mind, Esther. - Happy to help. 569 00:27:03,247 --> 00:27:06,292 Huh, something is not adding up here. 570 00:27:06,375 --> 00:27:08,460 Let's get out the company abacus and figure it out. 571 00:27:08,544 --> 00:27:11,172 You're printing the poem on the cover, yes? 572 00:27:11,255 --> 00:27:13,549 -The poem? -Oh, yes, a poem. 573 00:27:13,632 --> 00:27:17,136 There's been a poem on the cover of the Gazette celebrating the season 574 00:27:17,219 --> 00:27:20,306 -in every issue we've ever published. -I know. I'm an avid reader. 575 00:27:20,389 --> 00:27:23,934 -I was thinking of going another way. -Another way. Okay. 576 00:27:24,017 --> 00:27:27,938 Editor's choice, I guess. I'll leave you to it. 577 00:27:28,021 --> 00:27:29,314 See you later, Taylor. 578 00:27:29,773 --> 00:27:32,150 -Coffee pot needs washing. -And a jackhammer. 579 00:27:33,194 --> 00:27:36,405 Oh, hello, Taylor. Just came by to visit my little Perry White. 580 00:27:36,488 --> 00:27:40,951 Now, she's working. Don't distract her too much. 581 00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,788 Five-O! 582 00:27:44,871 --> 00:27:47,583 I've had a long day. A very long day. 583 00:27:47,666 --> 00:27:49,710 Me, too. 584 00:27:51,002 --> 00:27:52,421 A magical desk. 585 00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:58,093 Tell me, is this Scotch old? 586 00:27:58,176 --> 00:28:02,473 Judging by the "Save for VE Day," scrawled on the label, I'd say yes. 587 00:28:02,556 --> 00:28:03,682 Bottoms up. 588 00:28:06,393 --> 00:28:07,853 Oops, we woke Charlie up. 589 00:28:07,936 --> 00:28:11,648 I just left Michel at the Secret Bar. It's final. He's leaving. 590 00:28:11,732 --> 00:28:12,733 Really? 591 00:28:12,816 --> 00:28:15,235 He's giving me three months to find someone to replace him. 592 00:28:15,319 --> 00:28:18,280 -Claims it may not be enough time. -Always humble, our Michel. 593 00:28:19,323 --> 00:28:20,741 I'm really gonna miss him. 594 00:28:20,824 --> 00:28:22,368 - Me, too. 595 00:28:23,285 --> 00:28:24,328 --What? 596 00:28:24,411 --> 00:28:25,579 -Paul. -Who? 597 00:28:25,662 --> 00:28:27,373 -Come on. -You haven't broken up with him? 598 00:28:27,456 --> 00:28:29,500 Let's have another round tonight. 599 00:28:37,341 --> 00:28:38,550 Shoot! Woke Charlie up again. 600 00:28:38,634 --> 00:28:39,676 Oh. 601 00:28:45,641 --> 00:28:47,434 Well, we did it, folks. 602 00:28:47,518 --> 00:28:50,562 Our first issue of the Gazette is ready to hit the stands. 603 00:28:50,646 --> 00:28:53,399 -It's not my first issue. -Or mine, neither. 604 00:28:53,482 --> 00:28:55,066 Well, no, but it's mine. 605 00:28:55,150 --> 00:28:58,695 It's an accomplishment. A milestone. We should open some champagne. 606 00:28:58,779 --> 00:29:00,406 Gives me gas. 607 00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,742 Hey, question. What's the next step? 608 00:29:03,825 --> 00:29:06,077 -Huh? -Where do the papers go? 609 00:29:06,161 --> 00:29:09,290 All the businesses in town get a stack. 610 00:29:09,373 --> 00:29:11,208 Yes, but who delivers the stacks? 611 00:29:19,591 --> 00:29:20,592 How's it going in here? 612 00:29:20,676 --> 00:29:23,136 Fine, if Eric would run plates while they're hot! 613 00:29:23,219 --> 00:29:25,138 Customers cornered him. He'll be right in. 614 00:29:25,221 --> 00:29:28,934 Great. Eric's chatting about the Red Sox while the food's getting cold? 615 00:29:29,017 --> 00:29:32,438 - Oh, he hates the Red Sox. - And you. I'm mad at you. 616 00:29:32,521 --> 00:29:34,315 -Why are you mad at me? -You know why. 617 00:29:34,398 --> 00:29:37,150 Are you doing this? Are you siccing the mountain man on me? 618 00:29:37,233 --> 00:29:40,654 The couple from New York wants to know if the meat is Pat LaFrieda? 619 00:29:40,737 --> 00:29:41,822 -What? -Is it Pat LaFrieda? 620 00:29:41,905 --> 00:29:43,657 The couple from New York wants to know 621 00:29:43,740 --> 00:29:46,285 if I ground up some guy named Pat LaFrieda and served him? 622 00:29:46,368 --> 00:29:47,411 Tell them yeah. 623 00:29:47,494 --> 00:29:50,622 Give them this. They'll like it. I put Pat's pancreas in there. 624 00:29:50,706 --> 00:29:52,624 Luke, hon, have I thanked you lately 625 00:29:52,708 --> 00:29:55,210 for hosting Tuesday Burger Day at the Dragonfly? 626 00:29:55,294 --> 00:29:57,754 - There's no need. - But if it's driving you crazy-- 627 00:29:57,838 --> 00:29:59,214 -I'm fine. -You don't seem fine. 628 00:29:59,298 --> 00:30:00,841 I'm just trying to keep things going. 629 00:30:00,924 --> 00:30:02,092 - Okay. 630 00:30:02,175 --> 00:30:03,176 Hi. 631 00:30:03,259 --> 00:30:05,429 - Help. I need help. - What? 632 00:30:05,512 --> 00:30:07,514 -With what? -Gazette. Now. 633 00:30:07,598 --> 00:30:09,140 -Bring walking shoes. -Uh-- 634 00:30:09,224 --> 00:30:11,643 - You know I have a business! - I know. 635 00:30:11,727 --> 00:30:13,395 Instead of being there, running the diner, 636 00:30:13,479 --> 00:30:16,898 I'm here, talking about whether or not I ground up some Italian guy 637 00:30:16,982 --> 00:30:18,149 and served him in my burgers. 638 00:30:18,233 --> 00:30:19,901 Pat LaFrieda is a New York butcher. 639 00:30:19,985 --> 00:30:21,445 -Hire a chef. -I will. 640 00:30:21,528 --> 00:30:24,030 -Soon. -Uh, I'm gonna go get one right now. 641 00:30:25,281 --> 00:30:26,533 Wait. 642 00:30:26,617 --> 00:30:28,452 Are you just gonna leave me here? 643 00:30:28,535 --> 00:30:30,829 Hello? Eric? 644 00:30:30,912 --> 00:30:33,374 Somebody? Hello? 645 00:30:34,207 --> 00:30:36,335 -Got the list? Shoes on tight? -Check. Check. 646 00:30:36,418 --> 00:30:37,794 Let's do this. 647 00:30:39,170 --> 00:30:41,089 You take the west side, I'll take the east. 648 00:30:41,172 --> 00:30:42,633 Got it. 649 00:30:42,716 --> 00:30:43,925 -Where are you going? -West. 650 00:30:44,009 --> 00:30:45,301 -That's east. -That's west. 651 00:30:45,386 --> 00:30:47,471 It's not. See? Eastside Dental. It's east. 652 00:30:47,554 --> 00:30:49,890 And the name of the dentist at Eastside Dental is... 653 00:30:49,973 --> 00:30:52,393 Dr. Eastside. Holy cow, I just put that together? 654 00:30:52,476 --> 00:30:55,437 Look, you take that side of town, I'll take this side. 655 00:30:55,521 --> 00:30:56,522 Deal. 656 00:31:31,682 --> 00:31:34,017 -Rory, wait! -What's up, guys? 657 00:31:34,100 --> 00:31:36,061 -Where's the poem? -Didn't have room for it. 658 00:31:36,144 --> 00:31:38,354 -You didn't have room? -But the poem is great. 659 00:31:38,439 --> 00:31:39,565 The poem is traditional. 660 00:31:39,648 --> 00:31:41,900 -Now there's just words. -Those are articles. 661 00:31:41,983 --> 00:31:44,736 -Articles? -Who reads the Gazette for the articles? 662 00:31:44,820 --> 00:31:47,030 Thanks for coming. We appreciate your business. 663 00:31:47,113 --> 00:31:48,740 You look exhausted. 664 00:31:48,824 --> 00:31:51,076 - Calling in reinforcements. 665 00:31:51,159 --> 00:31:54,370 Okay. I'll take the west side, you take the east side. 666 00:31:55,664 --> 00:31:58,584 - That's west. - That's east. 667 00:31:58,667 --> 00:32:01,002 Dewey, I am telling you that is the west side. 668 00:32:01,086 --> 00:32:03,171 Nope. There's 38 here. I'm supposed to get 40. 669 00:32:03,254 --> 00:32:04,506 I'll come back with two more. 670 00:32:04,590 --> 00:32:07,342 -I can't accept partial delivery. -You can and you will. 671 00:32:07,426 --> 00:32:10,053 Bernie Roundbottom never conducted business like this! 672 00:32:10,136 --> 00:32:12,598 Well, there's a new Bernie Roundbottom in town! 673 00:32:18,604 --> 00:32:21,147 Shellfish gets better with age, Mrs. Cassini. 674 00:32:21,231 --> 00:32:22,273 Everyone knows that. 675 00:32:22,357 --> 00:32:25,068 Already got a complaint from Bootsy. You shorted him. 676 00:32:25,151 --> 00:32:27,863 -I don't care! -And people are missing the poem! 677 00:32:27,946 --> 00:32:29,823 Just a heads-up! 678 00:32:42,836 --> 00:32:45,171 Hey. What are you guys up to? 679 00:32:45,255 --> 00:32:48,133 We're doing "I drink your milkshake! I drink it up!" 680 00:32:48,216 --> 00:32:49,968 -It's from There Will Be Blood. -The movie? 681 00:32:50,051 --> 00:32:52,512 Mm-hmm. We love everything Paul Thomas Anderson does. 682 00:32:52,596 --> 00:32:54,681 -We're the Thirtysomething Gang! -See ya. 683 00:32:57,100 --> 00:32:58,477 Hello? 684 00:32:58,560 --> 00:33:00,228 Rory. Doyle. 685 00:33:00,311 --> 00:33:02,648 -Hey, Doyle. What's up? -Nothing much with me. 686 00:33:02,731 --> 00:33:05,609 What's up with you ruining my movie review in the Gazette? 687 00:33:05,692 --> 00:33:07,694 Doyle, please. I'm in the middle of my route. 688 00:33:07,778 --> 00:33:09,530 I was doing you a favor, right? 689 00:33:09,613 --> 00:33:13,408 You'd asked me if I'd like to contribute? I said yes, help out an old friend, 690 00:33:13,492 --> 00:33:15,326 and then you butchered it like a piece of veal. 691 00:33:15,410 --> 00:33:16,870 Your review of The Jungle Book 692 00:33:16,953 --> 00:33:20,456 took a 20,000-word detour into the history of African colonialism. 693 00:33:20,541 --> 00:33:22,959 So you're gonna get all anti-intellectual now? 694 00:33:23,043 --> 00:33:24,503 5,000 of those words were adjectives. 695 00:33:24,586 --> 00:33:27,297 -Who says adjectives are bad? -You, when you were my editor. 696 00:33:27,380 --> 00:33:29,508 I'm writing a couple things for Michael Bay, 697 00:33:29,591 --> 00:33:31,467 and he's really into adjectives. 698 00:33:31,552 --> 00:33:33,637 You trust his grammatical stylings over me? 699 00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:35,889 -Are you saying I'm a sell-out? -No, I'm not. 700 00:33:35,972 --> 00:33:38,892 I played snooker at his house last night, and he's really cool. 701 00:33:38,975 --> 00:33:42,312 -I don't have time for this. -What idiot got rid of the poem? 702 00:33:44,064 --> 00:33:45,273 -Hi. -Hi. 703 00:33:45,356 --> 00:33:47,317 We've been meaning to introduce ourselves. 704 00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:50,654 We get together a couple times a week, read our kids' résumés, 705 00:33:50,737 --> 00:33:53,532 trade job tips, just offer general support. 706 00:33:53,615 --> 00:33:55,617 We're the parents of the Thirtysomething Gang. 707 00:33:55,701 --> 00:33:56,743 See ya. 708 00:34:00,539 --> 00:34:02,248 Are you kidding me? 709 00:34:02,332 --> 00:34:04,876 - She was here about 20 minutes ago. - Hey, there. 710 00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:06,712 I just found newspapers at Mrs. Kim's. 711 00:34:06,795 --> 00:34:09,756 I just found newspapers at the dentist's. So there. 712 00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:12,551 Oh! For the love of-- We're hitting the same spots! 713 00:34:12,634 --> 00:34:15,011 Well, then stop hitting the east side, Rory! 714 00:34:15,095 --> 00:34:17,263 No. I'm hitting the west side! 715 00:34:17,347 --> 00:34:20,350 No! Dewey said this is the east side! 716 00:34:20,433 --> 00:34:22,018 That's the west side! 717 00:34:22,102 --> 00:34:23,895 We need a better system! 718 00:34:24,813 --> 00:34:28,024 I drink your milkshake! I drink it up! 719 00:34:29,484 --> 00:34:30,986 Going to the gym? 720 00:34:31,069 --> 00:34:36,575 Oh, yeah. I just... gotta go home and get my stuff. 721 00:34:36,658 --> 00:34:39,452 - Great. I'll see you there. - Okay. 722 00:34:42,873 --> 00:34:44,374 Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! 723 00:34:44,457 --> 00:34:46,877 - Rory! - Ouch! Ouch! 724 00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:49,671 -Ouch, my feet bloody hurt. -Ow! Ow! Ow! 725 00:34:49,755 --> 00:34:51,381 -What's wrong? -My feet hurt. 726 00:34:51,464 --> 00:34:54,342 -I told you to wear comfy shoes. -Even comfy shoes cannot offset 727 00:34:54,426 --> 00:34:56,303 the effects of the Bataan Death March. Ow! 728 00:34:56,386 --> 00:34:57,888 This walking thing is for chumps. 729 00:34:57,971 --> 00:35:00,181 I have newfound respect for people who deliver things. 730 00:35:00,265 --> 00:35:02,684 Next time I see the UPS guy, I'm gonna make him happy. 731 00:35:02,768 --> 00:35:04,144 Ew. 732 00:35:04,227 --> 00:35:07,147 - I want a raise. - Talk to my office manager. 733 00:35:07,230 --> 00:35:08,481 -Who's your office manager? -Me. 734 00:35:08,565 --> 00:35:09,441 Hey, I want a raise. 735 00:35:09,524 --> 00:35:11,484 At the year-end review, I'll throw you something. 736 00:35:11,568 --> 00:35:13,903 Did we order Chinese, Greek and Italian last night? 737 00:35:13,987 --> 00:35:16,239 -And hot dogs. -Ugh. Last night's a blur. 738 00:35:16,322 --> 00:35:17,866 What did we end up watching? 739 00:35:17,949 --> 00:35:21,119 Sound of Fear, or Co-Ed Call Girl? 740 00:35:21,202 --> 00:35:22,787 I'd remember if we'd rocked a Spelling. 741 00:35:22,871 --> 00:35:26,541 They should make a Lifetime movie out of Tori Spelling falling at Benihana. 742 00:35:26,625 --> 00:35:28,209 Grill of Death. 743 00:35:28,293 --> 00:35:30,879 - That reminds me, I need to call Grandma. - Oh, yes. 744 00:35:30,962 --> 00:35:33,506 When I think of blistering burns, I also think of my mother. 745 00:35:33,590 --> 00:35:35,842 Ouch! Ouch! 746 00:35:38,344 --> 00:35:40,138 - Hello? - Grandma. 747 00:35:40,221 --> 00:35:41,765 -Yes? -It's Rory. 748 00:35:41,848 --> 00:35:45,393 -Oh! Rory. Hello. -Are you okay? 749 00:35:45,476 --> 00:35:48,647 Uh, I guess. I... I just need some coffee. 750 00:35:48,730 --> 00:35:51,357 Berta, have the cousins bring me coffee! 751 00:35:51,441 --> 00:35:54,235 -Did I just wake you up? -No, I was just dozing. 752 00:35:54,319 --> 00:35:57,363 -Are you sick? -No, I... I'm fine. 753 00:35:57,447 --> 00:35:58,614 What time is it? 754 00:35:58,699 --> 00:36:00,784 -It's almost noon. -Already? 755 00:36:00,867 --> 00:36:03,662 Noon is when dock workers and rock stars get up. 756 00:36:03,745 --> 00:36:06,206 Are you doing some moonlighting I don't know about? 757 00:36:06,289 --> 00:36:09,042 Uh, no. Where are my glasses? 758 00:36:09,125 --> 00:36:11,586 Listen, I'd like to come see you. When are you free? 759 00:36:11,670 --> 00:36:15,256 -I don't know. What day is it? -It's Saturday. 760 00:36:15,799 --> 00:36:21,179 Well, I have a DAR meeting on Thursday, but other than that, I'm free. 761 00:36:21,262 --> 00:36:23,056 -So maybe I'll-- -Wait a minute. Hold on. 762 00:36:23,139 --> 00:36:25,016 Berta, was that the door? 763 00:36:25,100 --> 00:36:27,102 I'm sorry, Rory. I have to go. 764 00:36:27,185 --> 00:36:28,687 - Grandma-- 765 00:36:32,065 --> 00:36:33,066 Ouch! Ouch! 766 00:36:33,149 --> 00:36:35,318 I kind of dig it. It's like you're wearing a cowbell. 767 00:36:35,402 --> 00:36:38,905 Well, dig this. Grandma was asleep, and it's almost noon. 768 00:36:38,989 --> 00:36:41,366 -Hmm. -I woke her up! 769 00:36:42,784 --> 00:36:45,370 Are you hearing me? I woke up Emily Gilmore at noon. 770 00:36:45,453 --> 00:36:47,372 -I heard. -It's weird. 771 00:36:47,455 --> 00:36:48,539 It's weird. 772 00:36:49,124 --> 00:36:52,210 Thanks for the support you've given her. That's been helpful. 773 00:36:52,293 --> 00:36:54,337 Hey! She's the one who quit therapy 774 00:36:54,420 --> 00:36:56,840 and drove that poor woman into show business. 775 00:36:56,923 --> 00:36:58,674 -You're a child. -Get used to it. 776 00:36:58,759 --> 00:37:01,677 I have to head to the Gazette. News never sleeps. Ouch! 777 00:37:01,762 --> 00:37:03,221 -Ouch! Ouch! -Ouch! 778 00:37:03,304 --> 00:37:04,931 - Ouch! Ouch! - Ouch! Ouch! 779 00:37:05,932 --> 00:37:10,145 Welcome, everyone, to the first run-through of Stars Hollow: The Musical. 780 00:37:10,228 --> 00:37:14,107 This is a special preview performance for our advisory committee, 781 00:37:14,190 --> 00:37:17,610 and for a few select friends and family. 782 00:37:17,693 --> 00:37:22,532 I think you're all in for a real treat. But first, some business. 783 00:37:22,615 --> 00:37:26,452 What you see here today needs to remain strictly confidential. 784 00:37:26,536 --> 00:37:29,455 But rather than having good neighbors such as yourselves 785 00:37:29,539 --> 00:37:31,875 sign some cold legal document, 786 00:37:31,958 --> 00:37:35,045 how about you all raise your right hands and repeat after me? 787 00:37:35,670 --> 00:37:38,339 I, Stars Hollow theater lover... 788 00:37:38,423 --> 00:37:40,884 I, Stars Hollow theater lover... 789 00:37:40,967 --> 00:37:46,306 hereby swear that I will not divulge any portion of this show in any way... 790 00:37:46,389 --> 00:37:51,060 hereby swear that I will not divulge any portion of this show in any way... 791 00:37:51,144 --> 00:37:54,898 out of respect for the hard-working creators of this musical, 792 00:37:54,981 --> 00:37:56,191 so help me God, 793 00:37:56,274 --> 00:38:00,570 or Allah, or Buddha, or whatever it is you pray to. 794 00:38:00,653 --> 00:38:04,574 out of respect for the hard-working creators of this musical, 795 00:38:04,657 --> 00:38:05,658 so help me God, 796 00:38:05,741 --> 00:38:10,163 or Allah, or Buddha, or whoever it is you pray to. 797 00:38:10,246 --> 00:38:12,040 Wow! Are we excited about this! 798 00:38:12,123 --> 00:38:14,209 Wow! Are we excited about this! 799 00:38:14,292 --> 00:38:16,920 No, uh, people, the repeating part is over. 800 00:38:17,003 --> 00:38:19,464 You'll see that the show is a little rough, 801 00:38:19,547 --> 00:38:24,302 but Nat and I have put our hearts and souls into this, haven't we, Nat? 802 00:38:26,179 --> 00:38:28,849 -He needs more fiber, that boy. -Or last rites. 803 00:38:28,932 --> 00:38:33,478 Under each of your seats is a pen and clipboard with sheets of blank paper, 804 00:38:33,561 --> 00:38:35,480 ready for your feedback. 805 00:38:35,563 --> 00:38:40,276 Feel free to jot down any critique or suggestion any time during the show. 806 00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:47,033 And now, sit back, relax, and enjoy Stars Hollow: The Musical! 807 00:38:58,544 --> 00:39:00,421 One more for the road, huh? 808 00:39:01,672 --> 00:39:03,842 Can't a man enjoy a glass of whiskey 809 00:39:03,925 --> 00:39:07,470 after a hard day's work here in Stars Hollow? 810 00:39:07,553 --> 00:39:08,638 A man can. 811 00:39:09,389 --> 00:39:13,018 --But there's no man in this room. 812 00:39:13,101 --> 00:39:14,394 - What the-- - Shh! 813 00:39:14,477 --> 00:39:16,646 - But, look at the-- 814 00:39:16,729 --> 00:39:18,899 You were always a sly cat, Felix. 815 00:39:20,233 --> 00:39:21,860 But your talons have dulled. 816 00:39:25,071 --> 00:39:27,240 A cat has nine lives. 817 00:39:27,323 --> 00:39:30,201 -And all of mine are in the past! -Meow. 818 00:39:30,285 --> 00:39:33,413 I wish I was in the past. It's better than any future with you! 819 00:39:33,496 --> 00:39:34,830 - Low blow! 820 00:39:34,915 --> 00:39:36,917 --What's happening? 821 00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:38,877 - I don't know! 822 00:39:38,960 --> 00:39:40,045 Hold on! 823 00:39:42,172 --> 00:39:44,049 - What? 824 00:40:08,323 --> 00:40:09,991 No. What? 825 00:40:10,075 --> 00:40:14,662 ♪ We're working on building Working on building Stars Hollow ♪ 826 00:40:14,745 --> 00:40:18,874 ♪ We're working on building Working on building Stars, Stars Hollow ♪ 827 00:40:18,959 --> 00:40:23,338 ♪ This redwood tree, it soars so high It touches God in heaven ♪ 828 00:40:23,421 --> 00:40:27,675 ♪ We'll hack it into a dining room set That'll easily seat eleven ♪ 829 00:40:27,758 --> 00:40:32,138 ♪ Working on building Working on building Stars Hollow ♪ 830 00:40:32,222 --> 00:40:34,515 ♪ We're working on building Working on building ♪ 831 00:40:34,599 --> 00:40:36,351 ♪ Stars, Stars Hollow ♪ 832 00:40:36,434 --> 00:40:38,686 ♪ There's a river over there Got to move it over here ♪ 833 00:40:38,769 --> 00:40:40,813 ♪ Gonna kill a lot of beaver Gonna cull a lot of deer ♪ 834 00:40:40,896 --> 00:40:43,316 ♪ There's no EPA So we'll do it our way ♪ 835 00:40:43,399 --> 00:40:45,235 ♪ Stars Hollow! ♪ 836 00:40:45,318 --> 00:40:46,987 ♪ Got a hatchet and an ax And a hammer and a knife ♪ 837 00:40:47,070 --> 00:40:48,071 The guy is hot. 838 00:40:48,154 --> 00:40:49,739 ♪ And a red hot poker And a super sharp scythe ♪ 839 00:40:49,822 --> 00:40:52,075 ♪ Got a dagger and a mallet And a really big rock ♪ 840 00:40:52,158 --> 00:40:53,868 ♪ Stars Hollow! ♪ 841 00:40:53,952 --> 00:40:56,204 ♪ Got a hatchet and an ax And a hammer and a knife ♪ 842 00:40:56,287 --> 00:40:58,456 ♪ Got a red hot poker With a super sharp scythe ♪ 843 00:40:58,539 --> 00:41:00,833 ♪ Got a dagger and a mallet And a really big rock ♪ 844 00:41:00,916 --> 00:41:02,543 ♪ Stars Hollow! ♪ 845 00:41:17,558 --> 00:41:18,893 What a night! 846 00:41:18,977 --> 00:41:21,146 It's nothing but ice out there. 847 00:41:21,229 --> 00:41:24,107 Well, come inside. Warm yourself. 848 00:41:24,190 --> 00:41:27,402 Here, take my musket and ammunition while I pour myself a drink. 849 00:41:27,485 --> 00:41:30,613 My God! Your balls are frozen! 850 00:41:30,696 --> 00:41:33,366 It must be ten below out there. 851 00:41:33,449 --> 00:41:34,993 But you're all right. 852 00:41:36,452 --> 00:41:38,038 My brave soldier. 853 00:41:38,121 --> 00:41:40,165 Not so fast with the encomiums! 854 00:41:42,917 --> 00:41:44,460 Encomiums. Encomiums? 855 00:41:44,544 --> 00:41:46,921 We stood there all night, but the British never came. 856 00:41:48,589 --> 00:41:51,801 -I'm not the man you think I am. -But you are. 857 00:41:53,344 --> 00:41:55,305 - Go on. 858 00:41:55,388 --> 00:41:58,391 ♪ You are me in pants ♪ 859 00:41:58,474 --> 00:42:01,811 ♪ And you are me in a dress ♪ 860 00:42:02,728 --> 00:42:05,940 ♪ It fits a bit askance ♪ 861 00:42:06,024 --> 00:42:09,444 ♪ I've tried it on, I confess ♪ 862 00:42:10,736 --> 00:42:13,614 ♪ We met so awfully cute ♪ 863 00:42:13,698 --> 00:42:18,119 ♪ And you were ripe and curvy ♪ 864 00:42:18,203 --> 00:42:21,664 ♪ You brought me a crown of citrus fruit ♪ 865 00:42:21,747 --> 00:42:25,710 ♪ Which I hoped would cure your scurvy ♪ 866 00:42:29,422 --> 00:42:33,634 ♪ It's a love, love Love revolution ♪ 867 00:42:33,718 --> 00:42:37,180 ♪ In a revolutionary time ♪ 868 00:42:37,805 --> 00:42:41,226 ♪ You are like no other ♪ 869 00:42:41,309 --> 00:42:44,770 ♪ Because you are my brother ♪ 870 00:42:44,854 --> 00:42:46,231 ♪ But that's no crime ♪ 871 00:42:46,314 --> 00:42:47,732 -♪ Not yet ♪ -♪ Thank God ♪ 872 00:42:47,815 --> 00:42:48,858 ♪ Lafayette! ♪ 873 00:42:48,941 --> 00:42:53,279 ♪ It's a love, love Love revolution ♪ 874 00:42:53,363 --> 00:42:57,032 ♪ In a revolutionary time ♪ 875 00:43:05,166 --> 00:43:08,336 ♪ We'll raise cows and pigs ♪ 876 00:43:08,419 --> 00:43:12,798 ♪ And get honey from a hive ♪ 877 00:43:12,882 --> 00:43:16,177 ♪ We'll have 14 kids ♪ 878 00:43:16,261 --> 00:43:20,014 ♪ And hope that three will survive ♪ 879 00:43:20,098 --> 00:43:23,101 ♪ It's a war-torn time ♪ 880 00:43:23,184 --> 00:43:29,107 ♪ And I'm smelling you And I want to rip your threads off ♪ 881 00:43:29,190 --> 00:43:31,692 ♪ Let's have sex a lot ♪ 882 00:43:31,776 --> 00:43:33,819 ♪ Before the British ♪ 883 00:43:33,903 --> 00:43:36,739 ♪ Blow our heads off ♪ 884 00:43:44,038 --> 00:43:48,126 ♪ It's a love, love Love revolution ♪ 885 00:43:48,209 --> 00:43:51,962 ♪ In a revolutionary time ♪ 886 00:43:52,046 --> 00:43:56,176 ♪ It's a love, love Love revolution ♪ 887 00:43:56,259 --> 00:43:58,844 ♪ In a revolutionary ti-- ♪ 888 00:43:58,928 --> 00:44:02,432 ♪ Ha-ha-ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha-hime! ♪ 889 00:44:14,777 --> 00:44:17,822 --All right. Hold tight, everyone. 890 00:44:17,905 --> 00:44:21,867 We have a quick costume change, and next up, the Industrial Revolution. 891 00:44:23,244 --> 00:44:25,205 Hey, can I borrow your pen? 892 00:44:25,288 --> 00:44:27,290 Sure. Why? 893 00:44:27,373 --> 00:44:28,999 Advisory committee. 894 00:44:29,083 --> 00:44:30,084 Okay... 895 00:44:32,503 --> 00:44:35,089 Well, here we are. 1891. 896 00:44:35,173 --> 00:44:39,177 Did you hear about the new sport that this Dr. James Naismith created? 897 00:44:39,260 --> 00:44:41,053 It'll never catch on. 898 00:44:41,136 --> 00:44:43,556 -What's it called? -Basketball. 899 00:44:45,308 --> 00:44:46,559 I had an idea today. 900 00:44:46,642 --> 00:44:48,228 -For an invention. -What is it? 901 00:44:48,311 --> 00:44:51,689 A machine that would wash your dinner dishes automatically. 902 00:44:51,772 --> 00:44:53,608 That's a wonderful idea! 903 00:44:53,691 --> 00:44:55,901 I'll build the factory here in Stars Hollow. 904 00:44:55,985 --> 00:44:59,405 -We'll be rich! -As long as the workers stay complacent. 905 00:44:59,489 --> 00:45:00,531 And non-rhythmic. 906 00:45:00,615 --> 00:45:02,700 --Yo, yo, yo! Not so fast! 907 00:45:02,783 --> 00:45:04,327 -Wait a second. -I say! 908 00:45:04,410 --> 00:45:06,371 Let me tell you what I'm talking about. 909 00:45:06,454 --> 00:45:07,622 Oy vey... 910 00:45:07,705 --> 00:45:11,459 ♪ Hey, yo! Look, I'm rappin' Just like Hamilton on Broadway ♪ 911 00:45:11,542 --> 00:45:13,794 ♪ This is an odd way To tell the town story 912 00:45:13,878 --> 00:45:15,087 ♪ Depict the town glory ♪ 913 00:45:15,170 --> 00:45:17,757 ♪ And get you to follow me To Stars Hollow, see ♪ 914 00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:19,884 - No, no. - ♪ Magnetic, yo! ♪ 915 00:45:19,967 --> 00:45:21,093 ♪ I'm just like Magneto ♪ 916 00:45:21,176 --> 00:45:23,888 ♪ Last night I held a meeting Underneath the town gazebo ♪ 917 00:45:23,971 --> 00:45:25,973 ♪ We had sandwiches And talked all night ♪ 918 00:45:26,056 --> 00:45:28,684 ♪ And at the end we all voted to "Strike! Strike!" ♪ 919 00:45:28,768 --> 00:45:31,061 ♪ Young man, you must know This will ruin Stars Hollow ♪ 920 00:45:31,145 --> 00:45:33,689 ♪ And for me, all your rapping Is kind of hard to follow ♪ 921 00:45:33,773 --> 00:45:35,816 ♪ Yeah, Lin-Manuel Had to deal with this ♪ 922 00:45:35,900 --> 00:45:38,903 ♪ Give it time, just trust Your ears will adjust ♪ 923 00:45:38,986 --> 00:45:41,697 ♪ You gave me the mic And I'm gonna rock it ♪ 924 00:45:45,242 --> 00:45:50,831 ♪ The world is a terrible place ♪ 925 00:45:51,749 --> 00:45:56,128 ♪ There's junk mail and terrorism ♪ 926 00:45:56,211 --> 00:45:59,048 ♪ Tiny airplane seats ♪ 927 00:45:59,131 --> 00:46:03,218 ♪ New weird viruses Really small print ♪ 928 00:46:03,303 --> 00:46:05,721 ♪ And tank tops ♪ 929 00:46:05,805 --> 00:46:09,809 ♪ Anything by Jeff Koons ♪ 930 00:46:09,892 --> 00:46:11,894 ♪ Spam! ♪ 931 00:46:11,977 --> 00:46:13,563 ♪ Not the food ♪ 932 00:46:14,772 --> 00:46:17,942 ♪ Man-buns! ♪ 933 00:46:18,025 --> 00:46:22,196 - ♪ Those Occupy... ♪ - ♪ Radicals! ♪ 934 00:46:22,279 --> 00:46:26,826 ♪ What restaurants charge for wine ♪ 935 00:46:28,911 --> 00:46:30,871 -♪ And Putin ♪ -♪ And Putin ♪ 936 00:46:30,955 --> 00:46:32,707 -♪ And Putin ♪ -♪ And Putin ♪ 937 00:46:32,790 --> 00:46:36,836 ♪ And Pu-Pu-Pu-Pu-Putin ♪ 938 00:46:38,671 --> 00:46:44,760 ♪ What's there not to love About the town of Stars Hollow? ♪ 939 00:46:44,844 --> 00:46:46,846 ♪ With its twinkle lights ♪ 940 00:46:46,929 --> 00:46:48,473 ♪ Friendly people ♪ 941 00:46:48,556 --> 00:46:52,142 ♪ Ample parking and historic steeple ♪ 942 00:46:52,226 --> 00:46:55,020 ♪ Our sunsets are the best ♪ 943 00:46:55,104 --> 00:46:58,273 ♪ The kids are just adorable ♪ 944 00:46:59,108 --> 00:47:01,736 ♪ Our sewer system's new ♪ 945 00:47:01,819 --> 00:47:04,739 ♪ Our leash laws are enforceable ♪ 946 00:47:04,822 --> 00:47:07,950 ♪ So what's there not to love ♪ 947 00:47:08,033 --> 00:47:14,415 ♪ About the town of Stars Hollow Hollow, Hollow, Hollow ♪ 948 00:47:14,499 --> 00:47:18,794 ♪ Hollow, Hollow, Hollow, Hollow Hollow, Hollow, Hollow, Hollow ♪ 949 00:47:21,881 --> 00:47:23,424 No. Come on. 950 00:47:24,258 --> 00:47:26,469 Lorelai, what is your problem? 951 00:47:26,552 --> 00:47:28,262 What's next, a kickline? 952 00:47:30,139 --> 00:47:31,348 No. No. 953 00:47:34,394 --> 00:47:36,270 I'm Nostradamus. 954 00:47:46,906 --> 00:47:49,867 ♪ There's everything to love ♪ 955 00:47:49,950 --> 00:47:52,828 ♪ About the town of ♪ 956 00:47:52,912 --> 00:47:56,624 ♪ Stars Hollow ♪ 957 00:47:56,707 --> 00:48:00,085 ♪ Stars Hollow ♪ 958 00:48:00,169 --> 00:48:04,089 ♪ Stars Hollow! ♪ 959 00:48:13,849 --> 00:48:17,895 Okay. Well, uh... Wow! 960 00:48:17,978 --> 00:48:21,065 Where are we gonna meet to go over this? What's happening? 961 00:48:21,148 --> 00:48:22,525 Sit down! 962 00:48:22,608 --> 00:48:23,901 Ooh. Sorry. 963 00:48:27,362 --> 00:48:31,075 ♪ Waterloo, I was defeated You won the war ♪ 964 00:48:31,158 --> 00:48:32,452 Oh, no. 965 00:48:32,535 --> 00:48:33,744 Gotta be kidding me. 966 00:48:33,828 --> 00:48:38,248 ♪ Waterloo Promise to love you forevermore ♪ 967 00:48:40,084 --> 00:48:42,211 -You're not getting up? -I guess I am. 968 00:48:42,294 --> 00:48:44,171 -You're not gonna clap? -Yes I am. 969 00:48:48,258 --> 00:48:49,760 Yay. 970 00:48:51,554 --> 00:48:56,892 So, this is the zero hour, people. It's been a lot of hard work, 971 00:48:56,976 --> 00:49:01,606 and Nat and I are certainly proud of what we've accomplished thus far. 972 00:49:01,689 --> 00:49:04,817 But now, I need to hear from my trusted stable of advisors, 973 00:49:04,900 --> 00:49:08,529 and I want the unvarnished truth, warts and all. 974 00:49:08,613 --> 00:49:11,365 So hit me with it. Hold nothing back. 975 00:49:11,448 --> 00:49:13,200 We can take it. 976 00:49:14,869 --> 00:49:17,872 -This show is fantastic! -Ah! I knew it! 977 00:49:17,955 --> 00:49:21,125 Simba, you've been dethroned. Bow to the new king. 978 00:49:21,208 --> 00:49:23,377 It moves. It breathes. 979 00:49:23,460 --> 00:49:26,296 Add an orchestra, you can take it straight to Broadway. 980 00:49:26,380 --> 00:49:28,841 School of Rock. Bunch of schlock. This show gets an "A." 981 00:49:28,924 --> 00:49:31,927 I know nothing about musicals, but this is a fun musical. 982 00:49:32,011 --> 00:49:33,638 The book was terrific, too. 983 00:49:33,721 --> 00:49:36,724 Tevye, move over. There's a new Jew in town. 984 00:49:36,807 --> 00:49:39,727 Well, it seems like we've got unanimity here. 985 00:49:41,186 --> 00:49:42,479 Or do we? 986 00:49:44,106 --> 00:49:46,567 - Hmm? - You're awfully quiet. 987 00:49:46,650 --> 00:49:49,320 And you've been writing an awful lot on your clipboards there. 988 00:49:49,403 --> 00:49:51,989 Clipboards? You needed more than one clipboard? 989 00:49:52,072 --> 00:49:55,284 -Hey, Babette was writing a lot, too. -I was writing my funny zingers. 990 00:49:55,367 --> 00:49:59,955 Hasa diga eebowai, you Mormon nerds. Audiences are ringing a new doorbell! 991 00:50:00,039 --> 00:50:01,791 I got 26 more of these. 992 00:50:01,874 --> 00:50:04,126 So, I guess we're waiting for your opinion? 993 00:50:04,710 --> 00:50:07,796 Right. Well... 994 00:50:07,880 --> 00:50:12,593 I think... for a first run-through, it was... yeah. 995 00:50:14,011 --> 00:50:15,680 "Yeah" is not an opinion. 996 00:50:15,763 --> 00:50:18,223 Didn't you think it was charming? I thought it was. 997 00:50:18,307 --> 00:50:19,725 I did. I thought it was charming. 998 00:50:19,808 --> 00:50:23,687 I, uh, just had a few questions and maybe a few suggestions. 999 00:50:24,188 --> 00:50:25,648 -Really? -What's your suggestion? 1000 00:50:25,731 --> 00:50:26,816 Make it less perfect? 1001 00:50:26,899 --> 00:50:30,069 Now, now, people, I asked for the unvarnished truth. 1002 00:50:30,152 --> 00:50:32,362 Let's hear Lorelai's notes. Lorelai? 1003 00:50:32,446 --> 00:50:36,366 Okay. So, first, that opening scene... 1004 00:50:36,450 --> 00:50:39,328 With her black eye, the whiskey, the weird, gritty whatever it was. 1005 00:50:39,411 --> 00:50:40,495 What was that about? 1006 00:50:40,580 --> 00:50:44,541 The opening scene is an excerpt from a play I wrote in college 1007 00:50:44,625 --> 00:50:48,963 that happened to be blessed by my mentor, the great Edward Albee. 1008 00:50:49,046 --> 00:50:50,840 --You may know him 1009 00:50:50,923 --> 00:50:54,719 as the author of a little something called Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? 1010 00:50:54,802 --> 00:50:56,846 -Impressive. -Wow. 1011 00:50:56,929 --> 00:50:58,764 - You worked with Edward Albee? - Yes. 1012 00:50:58,848 --> 00:51:02,852 I was at Joe Allen one night, years ago, and I dropped the script on Albee's table 1013 00:51:02,935 --> 00:51:05,354 with my phone number and asked him to call me with notes. 1014 00:51:05,437 --> 00:51:08,148 Any notes at all that would make it better than it was. 1015 00:51:08,232 --> 00:51:11,526 And... he never called. 1016 00:51:11,611 --> 00:51:13,112 --Wow! 1017 00:51:13,195 --> 00:51:14,404 Congratulations, Taylor. 1018 00:51:14,488 --> 00:51:18,450 So, Edward Albee's eating at Joe Allen, you drop a script at his table, 1019 00:51:18,533 --> 00:51:21,203 he never calls, and that makes him your mentor? 1020 00:51:21,286 --> 00:51:23,873 You just don't understand the theater community. 1021 00:51:23,956 --> 00:51:24,999 I guess not. 1022 00:51:25,082 --> 00:51:26,876 I have dinner reservations. Are you done? 1023 00:51:26,959 --> 00:51:28,377 -What about the rapping? -What? 1024 00:51:28,460 --> 00:51:30,170 -Is this getting racial? -A little. 1025 00:51:30,254 --> 00:51:33,966 No. No. It's not racial. Just... Isn't it way too Hamilton? 1026 00:51:34,049 --> 00:51:36,761 -Hamilton's a smash. -It won a million Tonys. 1027 00:51:36,844 --> 00:51:40,097 It's very popular, but doesn't that make what we're doing derivative? 1028 00:51:40,180 --> 00:51:44,935 So, because Hamilton has rap numbers, no one else in the world can rap? 1029 00:51:45,019 --> 00:51:48,105 You will be so kind as to let RZA and Busta Rhymes know 1030 00:51:48,188 --> 00:51:49,815 that they're not allowed to rap anymore? 1031 00:51:49,899 --> 00:51:51,025 How does he know those names? 1032 00:51:51,108 --> 00:51:53,610 What about the Civil War number with the revolving stage? 1033 00:51:53,694 --> 00:51:54,779 What was the point of that? 1034 00:51:54,862 --> 00:51:59,033 Again, Hamilton utilized a revolving stage and it worked like gangbusters. 1035 00:51:59,116 --> 00:52:00,409 Ours looked like a lazy Susan. 1036 00:52:00,492 --> 00:52:02,411 Carl and Violet should dress up as condiments. 1037 00:52:02,494 --> 00:52:05,539 Condiments? Hmm, Nat, that's something we should kick around. 1038 00:52:05,622 --> 00:52:06,916 That's not the point. 1039 00:52:06,999 --> 00:52:10,210 That number got a standing O, and it's one of Nat's favorites. 1040 00:52:10,294 --> 00:52:11,295 If you want to cut it, 1041 00:52:11,378 --> 00:52:14,173 you'll have to pry it out of his cold, dead hands. 1042 00:52:14,256 --> 00:52:17,426 I don't think there's any other way to pry something from Nat. 1043 00:52:17,509 --> 00:52:20,637 But, to be clear, no one else is bothered by these detours? 1044 00:52:20,721 --> 00:52:21,764 No. 1045 00:52:21,847 --> 00:52:24,308 - If there's nothing else-- - Sorry, the lead girl. 1046 00:52:24,391 --> 00:52:26,143 -Can we talk about her? -Who? Violet? 1047 00:52:26,226 --> 00:52:28,103 What do you want? For her to be less perfect? 1048 00:52:28,187 --> 00:52:30,397 -Impossible. -She was Kinky Boots! 1049 00:52:30,480 --> 00:52:33,442 Just the part she plays. Her character goes from scene to scene, 1050 00:52:33,525 --> 00:52:36,236 falling in love with every guy from a different era. 1051 00:52:36,320 --> 00:52:38,864 -So? Sex sells. -She was Kinky Boots. 1052 00:52:38,948 --> 00:52:41,200 She has sex, like, 26 times in the show! 1053 00:52:41,283 --> 00:52:43,786 That's a lot of friction. A fire was gonna start down there. 1054 00:52:43,869 --> 00:52:46,580 -I didn't know you were such a prude. -I'm not a prude. 1055 00:52:46,663 --> 00:52:49,624 -You counted how many times she had sex. -She was Kinky Boots! 1056 00:52:49,709 --> 00:52:52,294 -So, everybody likes her? Violet. -Ouch. 1057 00:52:52,377 --> 00:52:55,630 Methinks the town stable has one mare too many for Lorelai. 1058 00:52:55,715 --> 00:52:58,926 -She has a beautiful voice. -And... she was Kinky Boots! 1059 00:52:59,009 --> 00:53:01,887 Babette, I love you, but Kinky Boots was a show, not a character. 1060 00:53:01,971 --> 00:53:04,014 She was in the road show, not the Broadway show. 1061 00:53:04,098 --> 00:53:06,976 And she wasn't Kinky Boots. She was Trish, the factory worker! 1062 00:53:07,059 --> 00:53:08,978 I'm right next to you. You don't have to yell! 1063 00:53:09,061 --> 00:53:10,938 - I'm not yelling. - Am I yelling? 1064 00:53:11,021 --> 00:53:12,439 Look, last thing. Abba? 1065 00:53:12,522 --> 00:53:16,902 Ah! Thanks for reminding me. We all love the Abba songs. 1066 00:53:16,986 --> 00:53:21,198 But my attorney warned me that doing the nine Abba songs at the end 1067 00:53:21,281 --> 00:53:23,658 might entangle us in some messy litigation. 1068 00:53:23,743 --> 00:53:27,788 Now, I've got a call in to Benny Andersson and Björn Ulvaeus of Abba-- 1069 00:53:27,872 --> 00:53:30,582 -You have their numbers? -But have yet to hear back. 1070 00:53:30,665 --> 00:53:34,128 You know, Taylor... I've written some songs. Sorry. 1071 00:53:34,211 --> 00:53:35,670 No. No, Sophie, go ahead. 1072 00:53:35,755 --> 00:53:37,172 I've never done anything with them, 1073 00:53:37,256 --> 00:53:40,342 but you can have them for free to sing at the end, if you like. 1074 00:53:40,425 --> 00:53:43,012 Well, that's very nice, Sophie. 1075 00:53:43,095 --> 00:53:44,471 Are they catchy? 1076 00:53:44,554 --> 00:53:46,849 -I could play one for you. -Please. 1077 00:53:55,732 --> 00:53:59,779 ♪ I feel the earth move under my feet ♪ 1078 00:53:59,862 --> 00:54:03,740 ♪ I feel the sky tumblin' down A-tumblin' down ♪ 1079 00:54:03,824 --> 00:54:05,826 ♪ I feel my heart start to tremble ♪ 1080 00:54:05,910 --> 00:54:07,912 Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah... Um... 1081 00:54:07,995 --> 00:54:09,621 That's not catchy. 1082 00:54:09,704 --> 00:54:11,456 Yeah, you're right. Sorry. 1083 00:54:11,540 --> 00:54:14,877 Honestly, everyone here is just throwing encomiums at this thing. 1084 00:54:14,960 --> 00:54:17,171 Mondo encomium! It's all swell? 1085 00:54:17,254 --> 00:54:18,798 I'm an island? 1086 00:54:21,175 --> 00:54:22,259 Guess I'm an island. 1087 00:54:22,342 --> 00:54:24,719 And I can just make my reservation. 1088 00:54:38,067 --> 00:54:39,526 - You don't like me. 1089 00:54:39,609 --> 00:54:41,570 Oh, you scared me. Violet. 1090 00:54:41,653 --> 00:54:43,280 -You don't like me. -That's not true. 1091 00:54:43,363 --> 00:54:44,907 - Why? 1092 00:54:44,990 --> 00:54:48,160 Have you ever performed? Been in a musical? Taken this risk? 1093 00:54:48,243 --> 00:54:49,995 No. Well, once. 1094 00:54:50,079 --> 00:54:51,997 I was Lucy in You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown. 1095 00:54:52,081 --> 00:54:53,207 I was awful. 1096 00:54:53,290 --> 00:54:56,376 Charlie Brown kicked me instead of the football and the crowd cheered. 1097 00:54:56,460 --> 00:54:59,671 So I wasn't Kinky Boots, okay? I was Trish. It's a featured role. 1098 00:54:59,754 --> 00:55:02,299 -It's a great role. -Well, I went on a lot. In Boston. 1099 00:55:02,382 --> 00:55:03,633 Boston's a big-ass town. 1100 00:55:03,717 --> 00:55:05,677 - Uh-huh. - Everybody's a critic. 1101 00:55:05,761 --> 00:55:07,596 -Well, it was my job. -Mm, well. 1102 00:55:08,513 --> 00:55:11,934 I got to go. Opening night's in a week. Thanks for the doubts. 1103 00:55:12,851 --> 00:55:15,896 -You're a terrific tap dancer! -I don't need your validation! 1104 00:55:16,396 --> 00:55:17,689 It's quite a find. 1105 00:55:17,772 --> 00:55:20,359 It's a hell of a find. Excuse my language. 1106 00:55:20,442 --> 00:55:21,944 Don't you think, Emily? 1107 00:55:22,027 --> 00:55:24,279 Oh, yes. Yes, quite a find! 1108 00:55:24,363 --> 00:55:27,532 And it was a yard sale. Not even a thrift shop. 1109 00:55:27,616 --> 00:55:31,828 It was at the bottom of a box, under an old toaster and a broken Slinky. 1110 00:55:31,912 --> 00:55:36,541 I'd drop by more yard sales myself, but you have to step into people's yards. 1111 00:55:36,625 --> 00:55:39,836 Oh, with their trampolines and their "Kiss the Gardener" signs. 1112 00:55:39,920 --> 00:55:43,215 With your approval, I would like to petition the national board 1113 00:55:43,298 --> 00:55:45,550 to fund the purchase of a top-notch display 1114 00:55:45,634 --> 00:55:47,887 for the diaries of Abigail Franklin. 1115 00:55:47,970 --> 00:55:50,305 -After we authenticate them, right? -Hmm? 1116 00:55:50,389 --> 00:55:53,934 We can't repeat what happened with the bogus Federalist Papers. 1117 00:55:54,018 --> 00:55:56,145 Where the word "Federalist" was misspelled. 1118 00:55:56,228 --> 00:55:58,022 We stopped that check just in time. 1119 00:55:58,105 --> 00:56:01,024 Very well, then. Post-verification. All in favor? 1120 00:56:02,442 --> 00:56:05,070 - Excellent. I'll get the process started. - Hmm. 1121 00:56:05,154 --> 00:56:08,073 Emily, these puffs... Are they crab? 1122 00:56:08,157 --> 00:56:09,408 Do they taste like crab? 1123 00:56:09,491 --> 00:56:11,160 - I don't know. - Neither do I. 1124 00:56:11,243 --> 00:56:13,412 Berta makes things, and I just eat them. 1125 00:56:13,495 --> 00:56:15,122 She doesn't tell you what they are? 1126 00:56:15,205 --> 00:56:16,957 Oh, no, she tells me. 1127 00:56:18,750 --> 00:56:21,045 Oh, my goodness! Is it three o'clock already? 1128 00:56:21,128 --> 00:56:22,754 -I have a hair appointment. -Me, too. 1129 00:56:22,837 --> 00:56:25,174 -Same here. -I guess the meeting's adjourned. 1130 00:56:25,257 --> 00:56:26,591 -Goodbye, darling. -Sorry to dash. 1131 00:56:26,675 --> 00:56:28,677 - Lovely meeting, dear. - Mm-hmm. Thank you. 1132 00:56:31,846 --> 00:56:34,808 Well, this is a surprise. Did I know you were coming? 1133 00:56:34,891 --> 00:56:37,561 Did I forget? Have I officially become an old woman? 1134 00:56:37,644 --> 00:56:40,605 No, not you. Never. I popped by to see if you were home. 1135 00:56:40,689 --> 00:56:43,317 No, no, no, Señora Emily-- 1136 00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:46,653 Berta no know anything, anything. 1137 00:56:49,531 --> 00:56:52,159 They're gonna miss their hair appointments, 1138 00:56:52,242 --> 00:56:53,493 and it's all their fault. 1139 00:56:54,328 --> 00:56:55,955 -Uh, Grandma... -Yes? 1140 00:56:56,038 --> 00:56:57,664 There's a TV in here. 1141 00:56:57,747 --> 00:57:00,500 Yes, there is. So would you like something to eat? 1142 00:57:00,584 --> 00:57:03,878 I have Berta puffs from today and some mystery soup from last night. 1143 00:57:03,963 --> 00:57:05,089 No, I'm fine. 1144 00:57:05,172 --> 00:57:07,549 Grandma, why is there a TV in here? 1145 00:57:07,632 --> 00:57:11,553 One of Berta's cousins heard me talking about a live opera that was coming on, 1146 00:57:11,636 --> 00:57:13,138 and it was during dinnertime, 1147 00:57:13,222 --> 00:57:15,057 so they brought it down and set it up for me. 1148 00:57:15,140 --> 00:57:17,351 -You ate in the living room? -Yes. 1149 00:57:17,434 --> 00:57:19,228 On this? It's a Duncan Phyfe! 1150 00:57:19,311 --> 00:57:21,438 I didn't eat on the coffee table. 1151 00:57:21,521 --> 00:57:23,107 They set this up for me. 1152 00:57:23,190 --> 00:57:26,235 - Am I being punk'd? - You're being dramatic. 1153 00:57:26,318 --> 00:57:29,779 Grandma, have you been getting out of the house at all? 1154 00:57:29,863 --> 00:57:31,615 Of course I have. I'm not a shut-in. 1155 00:57:31,698 --> 00:57:33,951 I mean socializing. Not just running errands. 1156 00:57:34,034 --> 00:57:37,079 -Are you getting together with people? -I was just with the girls. 1157 00:57:37,162 --> 00:57:40,082 I don't mean DAR meetings. Have you been doing anything fun? 1158 00:57:40,165 --> 00:57:41,791 Yes, I'm full of fun. 1159 00:57:41,875 --> 00:57:44,669 -You were asleep at noon the other day. -So? 1160 00:57:44,753 --> 00:57:46,838 It's not like you. Do you go to the club? 1161 00:57:46,922 --> 00:57:48,340 You and Grandpa loved the club. 1162 00:57:48,423 --> 00:57:50,800 I'm not even sure if my membership is up-to-date. 1163 00:57:50,884 --> 00:57:52,886 -Well, renew it. -Why? 1164 00:57:52,970 --> 00:57:56,056 You're too young to be eating in front of a TV, watching Matlock. 1165 00:57:56,140 --> 00:57:59,018 -Matlock isn't on anymore. -It's in repeats. 1166 00:57:59,101 --> 00:58:02,229 I'm watching PBS, not Matlock. I'm not 90. 1167 00:58:02,312 --> 00:58:03,313 That's my point. 1168 00:58:03,397 --> 00:58:06,733 Maybe you should go out at night, mingle, dance a little, have fun. 1169 00:58:10,445 --> 00:58:12,697 I should go save the ladies. 1170 00:58:12,781 --> 00:58:15,700 Berta, they have to go. They all have hair appointments. 1171 00:58:15,784 --> 00:58:18,162 We had a debate about Andy Griffith. Alive or dead? 1172 00:58:18,245 --> 00:58:19,997 Then we finished off the finger sandwiches. 1173 00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:23,833 Something must have gotten through, because she actually e-mailed me. 1174 00:58:23,917 --> 00:58:25,169 First contact in ages. 1175 00:58:25,252 --> 00:58:26,878 She said she would. What's it about? 1176 00:58:26,961 --> 00:58:29,256 Something fun. Your grandfather's gravestone. 1177 00:58:29,339 --> 00:58:30,924 Why would she e-mail you about that? 1178 00:58:31,008 --> 00:58:33,843 -There's a new one on the way. -What happened to the old one? 1179 00:58:33,927 --> 00:58:36,138 You mean "ones." Um... Let's see. 1180 00:58:36,221 --> 00:58:38,473 The first one had the Longfellow quote right, 1181 00:58:38,557 --> 00:58:40,975 but without attribution to Longfellow. Got chucked. 1182 00:58:41,060 --> 00:58:42,727 The second one had the attribution, 1183 00:58:42,811 --> 00:58:45,355 but she wanted a dash preceding it. Got chucked. 1184 00:58:45,439 --> 00:58:48,483 The third one fell off the delivery truck. That's not on her. 1185 00:58:48,567 --> 00:58:50,610 The fourth one had the dash and the Longfellow, 1186 00:58:50,694 --> 00:58:53,738 but no quotation marks around the quote. Got chucked. 1187 00:58:53,822 --> 00:58:55,449 This is number five. 1188 00:58:55,532 --> 00:58:56,866 Does she want us to proof it? 1189 00:58:56,950 --> 00:58:59,661 I don't know, Rory. She just wants us there. 1190 00:58:59,744 --> 00:59:00,995 Okay. So we'll go. 1191 00:59:01,913 --> 00:59:04,291 Right? Mom? Grandma asked us. 1192 00:59:04,374 --> 00:59:06,918 -We haven't visited the grave in a while. -I know. 1193 00:59:07,001 --> 00:59:08,670 I'm worried about her. 1194 00:59:08,753 --> 00:59:10,714 Okay. Fine. We'll go. 1195 00:59:10,797 --> 00:59:13,883 -TV tray in the living room. -Is what I originally named you. 1196 00:59:13,967 --> 00:59:15,427 -Bye. -Bye. 1197 00:59:21,933 --> 00:59:23,185 Rory Gilmore. 1198 00:59:23,769 --> 00:59:24,853 Yes, thank you. 1199 00:59:24,936 --> 00:59:28,357 We've gotten positive feedback for putting the poem back on the cover. 1200 00:59:28,440 --> 00:59:30,234 They are inspiring. 1201 00:59:30,317 --> 00:59:33,570 Yes, I'd say we don't have our heads up our backsides anymore. 1202 00:59:33,653 --> 00:59:35,530 Uh-huh. Thanks for calling. 1203 00:59:43,997 --> 00:59:45,540 - No cigar? 1204 00:59:47,126 --> 00:59:49,211 I pictured you chomping a fat cigar. 1205 00:59:49,294 --> 00:59:51,045 Doctor told me to cut back. 1206 00:59:53,047 --> 00:59:56,551 Esther, Charlie, this is Jess. He's Luke Danes' nephew. 1207 00:59:56,635 --> 00:59:57,927 Hello. 1208 00:59:58,011 --> 01:00:00,389 I remember you, punk. 1209 01:00:00,472 --> 01:00:02,141 Good to see you again, Esther. 1210 01:00:03,057 --> 01:00:04,893 You, too. What's it been? Four years? 1211 01:00:04,976 --> 01:00:06,686 Maybe more. When did you get in? 1212 01:00:06,770 --> 01:00:09,856 Just now. I'm meeting Luke. We've got Mom maintenance to do. 1213 01:00:09,939 --> 01:00:12,859 You hear she and T.J. accidentally joined some cult? 1214 01:00:12,942 --> 01:00:14,278 And that vegetables were involved. 1215 01:00:14,361 --> 01:00:17,156 -And an eight-million-year contract. -I heard it was six. 1216 01:00:17,239 --> 01:00:20,617 As editor of the Gazette, you have better sources than me, Mr. Roundbottom. 1217 01:00:20,700 --> 01:00:21,868 What? 1218 01:00:24,078 --> 01:00:27,040 -Oh. -Can't wait to hear how you got the job. 1219 01:00:27,124 --> 01:00:28,500 It was the usual thing. 1220 01:00:28,583 --> 01:00:30,752 I submitted my résumé, plus samples of my work, 1221 01:00:30,835 --> 01:00:33,672 I was thoroughly vetted, there were several interviews. 1222 01:00:33,755 --> 01:00:37,634 Plus complex negotiations over salary, benefits, parking. 1223 01:00:37,717 --> 01:00:39,427 -You asked Taylor? -Pretty much. 1224 01:00:44,099 --> 01:00:45,976 I don't want him to see me like this. 1225 01:00:46,560 --> 01:00:48,019 -It's good to see you. -You, too. 1226 01:00:48,102 --> 01:00:49,688 -How about some lunch? -Sure. 1227 01:00:52,232 --> 01:00:54,067 Very Lou Grant. 1228 01:00:54,151 --> 01:00:56,278 Last time I checked, grain was a food group. 1229 01:01:00,323 --> 01:01:01,950 -Bottoms up. -Roundbottoms up. 1230 01:01:05,787 --> 01:01:07,080 So, how are you? 1231 01:01:07,164 --> 01:01:10,124 -Luke says the book press is going great. -It's doing okay. 1232 01:01:10,208 --> 01:01:11,626 Dave Eggers is shaking in his boots? 1233 01:01:11,710 --> 01:01:14,921 If Dave Eggers even knows we exist, I'd be happy. 1234 01:01:15,004 --> 01:01:16,798 And in other stuff? Personal life? 1235 01:01:16,881 --> 01:01:19,593 Stable. Nothing permanent. What about you? 1236 01:01:19,676 --> 01:01:20,969 Oh, damn. 1237 01:01:24,055 --> 01:01:26,140 Did you just write "break up with P"? 1238 01:01:26,225 --> 01:01:28,393 - How about a second course? 1239 01:01:28,477 --> 01:01:31,188 -Esther, would you get that? -I'm filing something. 1240 01:01:31,271 --> 01:01:34,023 You've been filing that same piece of paper for a long time. 1241 01:01:34,107 --> 01:01:36,776 When you started, Nora Ephron felt good about her neck. 1242 01:01:36,860 --> 01:01:39,070 --Do you still want me to get it? 1243 01:01:39,153 --> 01:01:42,115 No. I could've been a contender. 1244 01:01:42,199 --> 01:01:43,992 -You're still a contender. -Oh yeah? 1245 01:01:45,994 --> 01:01:47,871 I'm broke. Busted. 1246 01:01:47,954 --> 01:01:50,916 Beggared. I have no apartment. No car. 1247 01:01:50,999 --> 01:01:53,960 -My license expired three months ago. -Get out of here. 1248 01:01:54,044 --> 01:01:57,047 Everything I own is in boxes scattered around three different states. 1249 01:01:57,130 --> 01:02:00,091 I have no job. I have no credit. I have no underwear. 1250 01:02:00,174 --> 01:02:01,718 -What? -I can't find that box! 1251 01:02:01,801 --> 01:02:04,471 -Buy some new ones. -Are you listening, man? I'm broke. 1252 01:02:04,554 --> 01:02:05,680 I'll lend you the money. 1253 01:02:05,764 --> 01:02:07,766 This isn't about you lending me money. 1254 01:02:07,849 --> 01:02:09,684 This is about my life! 1255 01:02:09,768 --> 01:02:11,478 People come up and smell me. 1256 01:02:11,561 --> 01:02:13,062 And what are they smelling? 1257 01:02:13,146 --> 01:02:16,525 Failure. Headmaster Charleston told me to go get my master's 1258 01:02:16,608 --> 01:02:19,236 so that I can teach at Chilton. He could smell it. 1259 01:02:19,319 --> 01:02:21,738 I went and interviewed at a website that I hate. 1260 01:02:21,821 --> 01:02:24,741 -They passed. They can smell it. -No one's smelling anything. 1261 01:02:24,824 --> 01:02:26,826 Maybe Paris will let me be a surrogate. 1262 01:02:26,910 --> 01:02:28,953 -She's always liked my teeth. -Slow down. 1263 01:02:29,037 --> 01:02:30,830 It's probably too late. I've aged out. 1264 01:02:30,914 --> 01:02:35,252 -Stop. This is a rut. It's temporary. -Or not. 1265 01:02:35,335 --> 01:02:37,462 You're a writer. Ruts are normal. 1266 01:02:37,546 --> 01:02:39,589 My friend Doyle's a Hollywood writer now. 1267 01:02:39,673 --> 01:02:43,301 -He's telling me to write a spec script. -You're not writing a spec script. 1268 01:02:43,385 --> 01:02:46,305 He gave me a copy of The Mysteries of Laura. Is that a show? 1269 01:02:46,388 --> 01:02:49,140 You need to write something that you're passionate about. 1270 01:02:49,223 --> 01:02:53,061 What is that foreign concept you speak of? "Passion"? Is that really a thing? 1271 01:02:53,144 --> 01:02:56,690 Find the thing that makes you feel, so that your readers feel it. 1272 01:02:56,773 --> 01:02:59,276 -What makes you feel? -Did I tell you I lost my wallet? 1273 01:03:02,236 --> 01:03:03,280 You should write a book. 1274 01:03:03,363 --> 01:03:05,740 Ugh, thanks for the Naomi Shropshire flashbacks. 1275 01:03:05,824 --> 01:03:06,866 Lovely. 1276 01:03:06,950 --> 01:03:09,035 - I know what you should write. - What? 1277 01:03:09,118 --> 01:03:10,454 Write about you and your mom. 1278 01:03:11,538 --> 01:03:13,290 -What? -It's a cool story. 1279 01:03:13,373 --> 01:03:16,167 It's got a point of view. It's something only you can write. 1280 01:03:18,545 --> 01:03:19,588 Think about it. 1281 01:03:22,299 --> 01:03:23,550 I gotta go. 1282 01:03:26,636 --> 01:03:27,804 Thanks for lunch. 1283 01:04:24,444 --> 01:04:26,946 - Thanks, guys. Looks great. - Okay. 1284 01:04:31,034 --> 01:04:32,911 Hello, Lorelai. 1285 01:04:32,994 --> 01:04:34,037 Hi. 1286 01:04:34,120 --> 01:04:35,914 They are waiting for you on the patio. 1287 01:04:35,997 --> 01:04:37,624 Lots of things going on here. 1288 01:04:38,542 --> 01:04:41,961 The cousins are here and they have their own ladders. It's exciting. 1289 01:04:42,045 --> 01:04:46,174 Mrs. Gilmore is so kind, the nicest woman I've ever met... 1290 01:04:46,257 --> 01:04:47,426 They're right outside. 1291 01:04:47,509 --> 01:04:49,260 -Thank you. -Uh-huh. 1292 01:04:49,343 --> 01:04:51,262 Hi, sorry I'm late. 1293 01:04:52,889 --> 01:04:54,348 Hello. 1294 01:04:54,433 --> 01:04:57,226 -Hello, there. -Jack, this is my daughter, Lorelai. 1295 01:04:57,310 --> 01:04:58,853 Lorelai, this is Jack Smith. 1296 01:04:59,563 --> 01:05:00,980 - Hi. Oh. 1297 01:05:01,064 --> 01:05:02,982 -Nice to meet you. -We've met. 1298 01:05:03,066 --> 01:05:04,192 -Have we? -Mm-hmm. 1299 01:05:04,275 --> 01:05:07,821 -At Richard's service. Jack spoke. -I was a good friend of your father's. 1300 01:05:07,904 --> 01:05:09,948 Spent many an hour with him on the golf course. 1301 01:05:10,031 --> 01:05:12,241 -Mmm. Yes. -Great man. 1302 01:05:12,325 --> 01:05:14,285 He was a golf player. Great. 1303 01:05:14,368 --> 01:05:16,580 -He was a great golf man. -Sit down, ladies. 1304 01:05:17,831 --> 01:05:20,374 I made a pitcher of gimlets with a vodka... 1305 01:05:21,292 --> 01:05:24,128 I brought back from Russia. It's wonderful. 1306 01:05:24,212 --> 01:05:26,840 - Want to try some? - Sure. 1307 01:05:28,382 --> 01:05:30,009 Rory didn't come with you? 1308 01:05:30,093 --> 01:05:31,720 -Lorelai? -Me? 1309 01:05:31,803 --> 01:05:35,724 - Yes, you. - Uh, she's coming separately. 1310 01:05:35,807 --> 01:05:38,435 Jack has offered to drive us all to the cemetery. 1311 01:05:38,518 --> 01:05:39,519 How nice of him. 1312 01:05:39,603 --> 01:05:42,396 Well, it's a hard day. You know, I just want to help. 1313 01:05:42,481 --> 01:05:44,649 Here you are, ladies. Enjoy. 1314 01:05:44,733 --> 01:05:46,067 - Thank you, Jack. 1315 01:05:46,776 --> 01:05:49,237 So, who are you? I... 1316 01:05:49,320 --> 01:05:51,698 Or, what, where, how do... 1317 01:05:51,781 --> 01:05:53,199 What do you do, Jack? 1318 01:05:53,282 --> 01:05:56,285 Well, I'm mostly retired. Venture capital. 1319 01:05:56,369 --> 01:05:59,080 I go into the office every now and then. They hide from me. 1320 01:06:00,582 --> 01:06:03,960 And what is the... the... but... 1321 01:06:04,043 --> 01:06:06,087 the... the blank... 1322 01:06:06,171 --> 01:06:08,089 -blank... -Yes? 1323 01:06:08,590 --> 01:06:10,133 Uh, it just flew out of my head. 1324 01:06:10,216 --> 01:06:13,720 -Is your drink all right? -Oh, yeah. It's very gimlety. 1325 01:06:13,803 --> 01:06:17,265 I'm thirsty. Parched. I'm gonna grab some sparkling water. 1326 01:06:17,348 --> 01:06:18,892 -Ah, I'll get it. -Oh, no, that's okay. 1327 01:06:18,975 --> 01:06:21,895 You stay there, Jack. I'll, um, bring some for all of us. 1328 01:06:21,978 --> 01:06:24,022 -You'll be right back? -I'll be right back. 1329 01:06:31,404 --> 01:06:32,906 - Hello? - Where are you? 1330 01:06:32,989 --> 01:06:35,659 Oh, hey. I'm at the Gazette. I lost track of time. 1331 01:06:35,742 --> 01:06:38,411 Stop the presses, because I've got your new lead story. 1332 01:06:38,495 --> 01:06:39,788 What are you talking about? 1333 01:06:39,871 --> 01:06:42,541 Your grandmother better buy herself a new TV tray. 1334 01:06:42,624 --> 01:06:44,250 -What? -She has a boyfriend. 1335 01:06:44,333 --> 01:06:46,044 -No. -Ugh, Jack. 1336 01:06:46,127 --> 01:06:48,087 Jack Smith. New Daddy Jack. 1337 01:06:48,171 --> 01:06:50,339 I'll put you on speaker. I have to google something. 1338 01:06:50,423 --> 01:06:52,383 Oh, come on. He can't be her boyfriend. 1339 01:06:52,466 --> 01:06:55,136 Well, he's struttin' around like he is. 1340 01:06:55,219 --> 01:06:59,432 Sitting next to her, all cozy, mixing cocktails at Dad's drink cart. 1341 01:06:59,516 --> 01:07:02,644 -The patio cart or the living room cart? -The patio cart. 1342 01:07:02,727 --> 01:07:05,396 -Oh well, that's not so bad. -How is that not so bad? 1343 01:07:05,480 --> 01:07:09,025 The patio cart's an auxiliary. I associate Grandpa with the living room cart. 1344 01:07:09,108 --> 01:07:13,822 Dad used both carts! I associate both with my departed father. 1345 01:07:13,905 --> 01:07:17,283 Oh, great. There's 54 million Jack Smiths. 1346 01:07:17,366 --> 01:07:19,578 -Of course that's his name. -Add Connecticut to it. 1347 01:07:19,661 --> 01:07:21,412 Yeah, got it down to two million. 1348 01:07:21,495 --> 01:07:23,540 Jack is short for John. Search John Smith. 1349 01:07:23,623 --> 01:07:25,166 Now my phone's just laughing at me. 1350 01:07:25,249 --> 01:07:28,127 -Where does she know him from? -The club. 1351 01:07:28,211 --> 01:07:31,464 -Oh, she went back to the club? -And he was at Dad's funeral. 1352 01:07:31,548 --> 01:07:33,424 Dad wasn't even in the ground, 1353 01:07:33,507 --> 01:07:37,511 and Jack was there, spraying his scent all over Mom. 1354 01:07:37,596 --> 01:07:40,348 I am in shock. Are you in shock? 1355 01:07:40,431 --> 01:07:41,933 Yeah, I'm in shock. 1356 01:07:42,016 --> 01:07:44,894 I thought she'd sworn off the club. She hasn't been there in ages. 1357 01:07:44,978 --> 01:07:47,647 Well, I may have encouraged her to go back. 1358 01:07:47,731 --> 01:07:49,273 -To the club? -Yes. 1359 01:07:49,357 --> 01:07:51,735 -You pimped out my mother? -I didn't pimp her out. 1360 01:07:51,818 --> 01:07:53,486 She was getting very isolated. 1361 01:07:53,570 --> 01:07:55,780 You sent a vulnerable, wounded turtle 1362 01:07:55,864 --> 01:07:58,491 into a nest of horny, gray-haired honey badgers. 1363 01:07:58,575 --> 01:08:01,369 -I thought she would play backgammon! -Now, thanks to you, 1364 01:08:01,452 --> 01:08:03,913 she's out there sipping a gimlet with Jack the Zipper. 1365 01:08:03,997 --> 01:08:05,039 You're missing this. 1366 01:08:05,123 --> 01:08:06,958 I told Grandma I'd meet you at the cemetery. 1367 01:08:07,041 --> 01:08:08,334 I'm working on something. 1368 01:08:08,918 --> 01:08:10,086 Oh, what is it? 1369 01:08:10,169 --> 01:08:12,380 It's a surprise. I... I'm excited. 1370 01:08:12,463 --> 01:08:14,924 -I want to tell you in person. -Good. I want to hear something 1371 01:08:15,008 --> 01:08:16,009 that won't make me queasy. 1372 01:08:16,092 --> 01:08:17,426 -Lorelai. -I gotta go. 1373 01:08:17,510 --> 01:08:19,679 -Oh, uh, we'll see you later. -Bye. 1374 01:08:19,763 --> 01:08:22,098 Rory's gonna meet us at the cemetery. 1375 01:08:22,181 --> 01:08:24,684 - Do you have a problem? 1376 01:08:24,768 --> 01:08:27,687 -I mean, who is this guy, Mom? -Jack Smith. 1377 01:08:27,771 --> 01:08:29,522 What do you know about this Jack Smith? 1378 01:08:29,606 --> 01:08:31,900 I know everything. We've been friends for 30 years. 1379 01:08:31,983 --> 01:08:33,442 Friends, huh? 1380 01:08:33,526 --> 01:08:35,612 Playing some golf, sipping bub at the club? 1381 01:08:35,695 --> 01:08:38,156 -What are you babbling about? -You don't know him. 1382 01:08:38,239 --> 01:08:40,241 -Oh, for Pete's sake. -I mean, what is he after? 1383 01:08:40,324 --> 01:08:41,325 Nothing. Why? 1384 01:08:41,409 --> 01:08:43,828 -I ain't saying he's a gold digger. -Lorelai-- 1385 01:08:43,912 --> 01:08:45,789 Mom, you're a catch. You're vulnerable. 1386 01:08:45,872 --> 01:08:47,624 -You have money. -He has more. 1387 01:08:47,707 --> 01:08:49,208 I ain't saying you're a gold digger. 1388 01:08:49,292 --> 01:08:51,836 Jack is a widower and we are friends. 1389 01:08:51,920 --> 01:08:54,213 -I can't have friends? -Of course you can. 1390 01:08:54,297 --> 01:08:55,798 Friends are for other people? 1391 01:08:55,882 --> 01:08:59,052 It's just weird to see him here. I'm processing. 1392 01:08:59,135 --> 01:09:03,932 Maybe it's good. Maybe it's good... that you're moving on. 1393 01:09:04,515 --> 01:09:06,809 Oh, I see. It's good that I'm moving on 1394 01:09:06,893 --> 01:09:08,770 -because now I'm someone else's problem. -What? 1395 01:09:08,853 --> 01:09:12,106 You won't have to worry about me because now I have a man in my life. 1396 01:09:12,190 --> 01:09:15,068 -I didn't say that. -You're released from all responsibility. 1397 01:09:15,151 --> 01:09:17,070 -I didn't-- -You've forgotten about your father? 1398 01:09:17,153 --> 01:09:18,362 Help me with the segues here. 1399 01:09:18,446 --> 01:09:21,074 I'm not dismissing Richard by spending time with Jack. 1400 01:09:21,157 --> 01:09:22,909 I'm not just moving on. 1401 01:09:22,992 --> 01:09:25,745 Okay. I didn't... 1402 01:09:25,829 --> 01:09:30,333 Let's not leave Jack and the auxiliary cart waiting out there. 1403 01:09:30,416 --> 01:09:32,251 - Where's Luke today? 1404 01:09:32,335 --> 01:09:33,837 I'm never skipping breakfast again. 1405 01:09:33,920 --> 01:09:36,380 Is he going to call me about that real estate we saw? 1406 01:09:36,464 --> 01:09:37,548 What real estate? 1407 01:09:37,631 --> 01:09:41,469 I took that "partner" of yours to look at potential franchise locations. 1408 01:09:41,552 --> 01:09:43,512 It was your father's dying wish. 1409 01:09:43,596 --> 01:09:46,432 -He wanted to give Luke a leg up. -Luke does not need a leg up. 1410 01:09:46,515 --> 01:09:48,142 I spent half a day with him. 1411 01:09:48,226 --> 01:09:51,062 Nice to know he doesn't mind wasting a grieving widow's time. 1412 01:09:51,145 --> 01:09:53,564 -When was this? -He didn't tell you? 1413 01:09:53,647 --> 01:09:54,858 Yes, he did. 1414 01:09:54,941 --> 01:09:56,985 Do you and that partner of yours even talk? 1415 01:09:57,068 --> 01:09:59,987 -Yes, always. Constantly. -Could have fooled me. 1416 01:10:03,992 --> 01:10:04,993 We need to go. 1417 01:10:06,035 --> 01:10:07,746 Jack, we should be going. 1418 01:10:23,636 --> 01:10:26,389 -So, that's the honey badger? -That's him. 1419 01:10:26,472 --> 01:10:28,516 -How was the drive? -Cologne-scented. 1420 01:10:29,475 --> 01:10:31,019 - Hello, honey. - Hi, Grandma. 1421 01:10:31,102 --> 01:10:33,521 Jack is gonna wait for us in the car. Shall we? 1422 01:10:33,604 --> 01:10:35,398 Yeah. Okay. 1423 01:10:45,158 --> 01:10:47,118 I thought we took a left at the Gundersons. 1424 01:10:47,201 --> 01:10:51,080 -I thought it was a right at the Turners. -I know the way. 1425 01:10:51,164 --> 01:10:52,540 Stanley. 1426 01:10:52,623 --> 01:10:55,001 Good afternoon, Mrs. Gilmore and ladies. 1427 01:10:55,084 --> 01:10:57,837 - Hi. - Hello. Are we all set here? 1428 01:10:57,921 --> 01:10:59,088 Yes, we are. 1429 01:11:00,631 --> 01:11:02,633 It was newly polished this morning. 1430 01:11:02,716 --> 01:11:04,510 The coal gray is just the right shade, 1431 01:11:04,593 --> 01:11:06,637 there's a dash in front of the Longfellow-- 1432 01:11:06,720 --> 01:11:08,681 -There are single quotation marks. -Here we go. 1433 01:11:08,765 --> 01:11:11,225 It was supposed to be double quotation marks. 1434 01:11:11,309 --> 01:11:12,393 Of course it was. 1435 01:11:12,476 --> 01:11:15,104 It was always correct before this. Why would you change it? 1436 01:11:15,188 --> 01:11:17,190 I am going to look into this. 1437 01:11:17,273 --> 01:11:20,443 I'm coming with you. This is ridiculous. This is the fourth one. 1438 01:11:20,526 --> 01:11:21,861 -Fifth. -Stay here. 1439 01:11:21,945 --> 01:11:22,946 -Okay. -Sure. 1440 01:11:23,029 --> 01:11:26,699 We can get someone on-site to carve them into double quotation marks. 1441 01:11:26,783 --> 01:11:29,410 Five stones and five mistakes. What is going on here? 1442 01:11:29,493 --> 01:11:31,537 The third one did fall off the truck. 1443 01:11:31,620 --> 01:11:35,124 -I think the single quotes look fine. -Let her have what she wants. 1444 01:11:35,208 --> 01:11:37,043 Grandma's still got your back, Grandpa. 1445 01:11:38,211 --> 01:11:40,546 Well, this gives me a chance to fix his flowers. 1446 01:11:43,091 --> 01:11:44,300 You take these. 1447 01:11:45,593 --> 01:11:48,096 So, what do you think of Queens? 1448 01:11:48,179 --> 01:11:50,389 The monarch or the guys who are fun to hang out with? 1449 01:11:50,473 --> 01:11:51,808 The borough. 1450 01:11:51,891 --> 01:11:53,517 I've been looking at apartments. 1451 01:11:53,601 --> 01:11:55,812 I think I'm gonna try Queens. It's the hot place. 1452 01:11:55,895 --> 01:11:57,480 -What about Brooklyn? -Brooklyn's done. 1453 01:11:57,563 --> 01:12:00,108 -Oh, I'm so behind. -You get more space in Queens. 1454 01:12:00,191 --> 01:12:02,401 I want a bedroom and a dedicated writing space, 1455 01:12:02,485 --> 01:12:03,569 especially since-- 1456 01:12:03,652 --> 01:12:06,655 Is this the top-secret Manhattan Project you've been working on? 1457 01:12:06,739 --> 01:12:09,492 -Could be. -Ooh, happy news. Tell, tell. 1458 01:12:09,575 --> 01:12:11,828 Well, it's a book. 1459 01:12:11,911 --> 01:12:12,996 -You bought one? -No. 1460 01:12:13,079 --> 01:12:14,538 -Borrowed one? Burned one? -No. No. 1461 01:12:14,622 --> 01:12:15,999 I'm writing a book. 1462 01:12:16,082 --> 01:12:17,959 Really? Nutty Naomi changed her mind? 1463 01:12:18,042 --> 01:12:19,668 Oh, no, I'm writing this solo. 1464 01:12:19,752 --> 01:12:22,088 -No crazy collaborators. -Wow! 1465 01:12:22,171 --> 01:12:23,297 I know, right? 1466 01:12:23,381 --> 01:12:25,216 So, what's it about? I'm dying to hear. 1467 01:12:25,299 --> 01:12:26,717 Sorry, just an expression. 1468 01:12:26,800 --> 01:12:29,553 --Is it a love story? A mystery? 1469 01:12:29,637 --> 01:12:32,932 A feel-good puppy, kitten, pony, raccoon travel across country 1470 01:12:33,016 --> 01:12:35,601 -to enter a cow in the county fair story? -It's non-fiction. 1471 01:12:35,685 --> 01:12:38,104 So is the puppy, kitten, pony, raccoon, cow county fair caper. 1472 01:12:38,187 --> 01:12:42,108 No animals, no capers. It's about me and you. 1473 01:12:44,027 --> 01:12:45,862 -Me and you? -Yes. 1474 01:12:46,779 --> 01:12:50,909 - And do we fight crime? - It's about our relationship. 1475 01:12:50,992 --> 01:12:53,744 Our mother-daughter thing. The friend thing. 1476 01:12:53,827 --> 01:12:57,081 It's our journey, and the journey you took before I was born. 1477 01:12:58,207 --> 01:12:59,292 Hmm. 1478 01:13:01,252 --> 01:13:04,047 Maybe I glossed over it too much. 1479 01:13:04,130 --> 01:13:06,007 Just... picture this. 1480 01:13:06,090 --> 01:13:07,550 It starts. 1481 01:13:07,633 --> 01:13:10,053 You're 16, you're pregnant. 1482 01:13:10,136 --> 01:13:12,805 You're packing up to leave Grandma's house. 1483 01:13:12,889 --> 01:13:16,517 It's a riches-to-rags story. It's got everything. 1484 01:13:16,600 --> 01:13:19,395 Family struggle, class warfare, the independent woman thing. 1485 01:13:19,478 --> 01:13:21,647 From there, I'll tell the story chronologically, 1486 01:13:21,730 --> 01:13:24,733 or jump back and forth a bit. I haven't decided yet, but-- 1487 01:13:24,817 --> 01:13:27,320 -No. -What do you mean, "no"? 1488 01:13:27,403 --> 01:13:30,156 -No, I don't want you to write that. -You don't understand. 1489 01:13:30,239 --> 01:13:32,158 -Let me pitch it again. -I get it. No. 1490 01:13:32,241 --> 01:13:34,702 -Why? -Because it's my life. 1491 01:13:34,785 --> 01:13:37,246 -It's our life. -You write your side of it. 1492 01:13:37,330 --> 01:13:38,915 -My side. -Yeah. 1493 01:13:39,082 --> 01:13:41,334 And who would I be talking to? 1494 01:13:41,417 --> 01:13:44,003 I don't know, Mrs. Muir. Find a ghost. 1495 01:13:44,087 --> 01:13:47,924 -Mom, come on. I have to do this. -You don't have my permission. 1496 01:13:48,007 --> 01:13:50,969 -We should go somewhere else. -The dead don't have ears. 1497 01:13:51,052 --> 01:13:53,512 - But there are people behind us. 1498 01:13:53,596 --> 01:13:55,348 Where is this coming from? What inspired you? 1499 01:13:55,431 --> 01:13:57,100 I was frustrated. I was talking to Jess-- 1500 01:13:57,183 --> 01:13:59,018 Jess? How the hell did he get into this? 1501 01:13:59,102 --> 01:14:00,894 -He was here visiting Luke. -Oh, great. 1502 01:14:00,979 --> 01:14:03,856 I'm looking forward to Jess' take on me. That's terrific. 1503 01:14:03,940 --> 01:14:05,358 It's not his take on you. 1504 01:14:05,441 --> 01:14:07,235 -Sorry, kid. Write about something else. -No. 1505 01:14:07,318 --> 01:14:08,361 About your relationships. 1506 01:14:08,444 --> 01:14:10,446 -You and Jess and Dean. -They'll be in it, too. 1507 01:14:10,529 --> 01:14:13,115 Don't forget to include Logan, the guy you just can't quit. 1508 01:14:13,199 --> 01:14:15,660 -It's not fair. -It's my life, Rory. 1509 01:14:16,285 --> 01:14:18,704 I went to all this effort for many, many years, 1510 01:14:18,787 --> 01:14:21,040 making sure people only knew what I wanted them to. 1511 01:14:21,123 --> 01:14:24,251 Now you're gonna put it all in a book? I don't want my mother finding out 1512 01:14:24,335 --> 01:14:27,129 I left you in a bucket in a hardware store in chapter six. 1513 01:14:27,213 --> 01:14:29,340 -Are you kidding me? -You're 32 years old. 1514 01:14:29,423 --> 01:14:31,800 She'll still petition the court to have you taken away. 1515 01:14:31,884 --> 01:14:33,594 This is such an overreaction. 1516 01:14:33,677 --> 01:14:37,390 Really? Do you know that your grandmother called you Susan until you were two? 1517 01:14:37,473 --> 01:14:38,349 She did not. 1518 01:14:38,432 --> 01:14:40,768 Write a book about that, a woman who leaves a baby 1519 01:14:40,851 --> 01:14:43,021 in a bucket and her own mother takes her to court. 1520 01:14:43,104 --> 01:14:45,606 It's a perfect Lifetime movie. Maggie Smith can play the mother. 1521 01:14:45,689 --> 01:14:48,234 -Mom, come on. -You didn't think this through, kid. 1522 01:14:48,317 --> 01:14:52,071 No, I did think this through. I am not a kid. This was not a whim. 1523 01:14:52,155 --> 01:14:55,158 Last night I outlined the first five chapters just like that. 1524 01:14:55,241 --> 01:14:56,993 -That's a sign. -What sign? 1525 01:14:57,076 --> 01:14:59,203 That this is it. This is what I am supposed to do. 1526 01:14:59,287 --> 01:15:00,621 - No. 1527 01:15:00,704 --> 01:15:02,623 I'm sorry. I have to. 1528 01:15:02,706 --> 01:15:06,669 Without this, it's grad school or groveling for jobs that I don't want. 1529 01:15:06,752 --> 01:15:07,795 Find another subject. 1530 01:15:07,878 --> 01:15:10,839 So I shouldn't do something that could change my future 1531 01:15:10,923 --> 01:15:13,717 because you don't want Grandma to know you left me in a bucket. 1532 01:15:13,801 --> 01:15:15,094 That's what this boils down to? 1533 01:15:15,178 --> 01:15:17,388 -More or less. -But you did leave me in a bucket! 1534 01:15:17,471 --> 01:15:19,307 You know what? Do whatever you want, Rory. 1535 01:15:19,390 --> 01:15:21,142 You're a big girl. I can't stop you. 1536 01:15:21,225 --> 01:15:24,562 No, that's not how you and I work. We don't do passive-aggressive. 1537 01:15:24,645 --> 01:15:27,856 That's how you and your mother work. You should be on my side. 1538 01:15:27,940 --> 01:15:30,359 I need this. Can't you understand that? 1539 01:15:30,443 --> 01:15:33,446 I understand. I always understand. 1540 01:15:34,155 --> 01:15:37,700 For the last 32 years, I have been the queen of understanding. 1541 01:15:37,783 --> 01:15:40,244 Mom, stop. Please, give me this. 1542 01:15:40,328 --> 01:15:42,496 I can't. Not this time. 1543 01:15:45,041 --> 01:15:47,668 Tell Grandma that I will check in on her later. 1544 01:15:48,669 --> 01:15:50,379 So much for the happy news! 1545 01:16:08,147 --> 01:16:11,192 -Hey. -Hey. How did it go today? 1546 01:16:11,275 --> 01:16:12,985 We're hoping number six will be the charm. 1547 01:16:13,069 --> 01:16:14,778 -What? -Ugh, no coffee? 1548 01:16:14,862 --> 01:16:18,116 - No, these people are leaving. 1549 01:16:18,199 --> 01:16:20,033 -They're not having coffee. -I want coffee. 1550 01:16:20,118 --> 01:16:22,245 You'll make a pot and drink a cup. It's a waste. 1551 01:16:22,328 --> 01:16:24,788 -I'll drink the whole pot. -You're not gonna do that. 1552 01:16:24,872 --> 01:16:27,875 So, I'll get a doggy bag and take the leftover coffee home. 1553 01:16:27,958 --> 01:16:29,543 -What's the problem? -I'm just saying-- 1554 01:16:29,627 --> 01:16:31,087 -Is the world out of coffee? -No. 1555 01:16:31,170 --> 01:16:33,339 Is Colombia pissed over Narcos and holding out? 1556 01:16:33,422 --> 01:16:34,715 Fine. 1557 01:16:34,798 --> 01:16:36,467 How much longer are you gonna be like this? 1558 01:16:36,550 --> 01:16:37,885 -What? -You've been grumpy. 1559 01:16:37,968 --> 01:16:39,387 -No, I haven't. -Yes, you have. 1560 01:16:39,470 --> 01:16:41,222 -Can we talk at home? -This is home. 1561 01:16:41,305 --> 01:16:43,182 Come on. I'm just trying to work here. 1562 01:16:43,266 --> 01:16:46,227 Why didn't you tell me you looked for franchise locations? 1563 01:16:46,310 --> 01:16:47,770 Is that something someone hides? 1564 01:16:47,853 --> 01:16:49,980 I was caught out today. I don't like that. 1565 01:16:50,063 --> 01:16:51,857 -Oh, you don't like being caught out? -Yes. 1566 01:16:51,941 --> 01:16:54,443 Why didn't you tell me you weren't going to therapy anymore? 1567 01:16:56,154 --> 01:16:57,821 -I don't know. -Why'd you hide it? 1568 01:16:57,905 --> 01:16:59,907 -I don't know. -She hasn't been going for a while. 1569 01:16:59,990 --> 01:17:01,075 -That's what she said. -Yes. 1570 01:17:01,159 --> 01:17:03,619 So where have you been? If you guys aren't doing therapy, 1571 01:17:03,702 --> 01:17:07,290 where are you on those days you say you're in therapy? 1572 01:17:07,373 --> 01:17:09,958 -I was still going. -You're still going. 1573 01:17:10,042 --> 01:17:12,336 -By myself. -Oh, okay. Yeah. 1574 01:17:12,419 --> 01:17:13,921 -You don't believe me? -I believe you. 1575 01:17:14,004 --> 01:17:16,590 -Uh, Luke. -I don't know, okay? I don't know. 1576 01:17:16,674 --> 01:17:18,301 - Where do you think I was? 1577 01:17:18,384 --> 01:17:21,804 Having a hot affair at 10:30 every Tuesday morning? 1578 01:17:21,887 --> 01:17:23,222 That's early for a nooner. 1579 01:17:23,306 --> 01:17:27,143 Let's see. Who could it be with? Uh, maybe the morning food delivery guy? 1580 01:17:27,226 --> 01:17:29,603 Or Lou, the guy who wears a wool cap even in summer? 1581 01:17:29,687 --> 01:17:31,897 I don't know who that is. I don't know anything. 1582 01:17:31,980 --> 01:17:33,065 I'm not having an affair. 1583 01:17:33,149 --> 01:17:35,151 Of course not. You're going to therapy by yourself. 1584 01:17:35,234 --> 01:17:37,361 I mean, your mother dragged you into it, 1585 01:17:37,445 --> 01:17:39,905 but then you fell in love with it and you threw her out. 1586 01:17:39,988 --> 01:17:42,366 Makes perfect sense. Can I get you anything else? 1587 01:17:42,450 --> 01:17:44,868 -I'd actually like a little coffee. -Oh, for the love of... 1588 01:17:44,952 --> 01:17:47,830 -You don't believe me? -I don't know what to believe. 1589 01:17:47,913 --> 01:17:50,791 You want to call my mother and have her confirm the story? 1590 01:17:50,874 --> 01:17:53,211 No! I don't want to call your mother. 1591 01:17:53,294 --> 01:17:55,087 I don't call your mother. 1592 01:17:55,171 --> 01:17:57,465 -You know, we struck a deal. -What deal? 1593 01:17:57,548 --> 01:17:59,132 You've got your life, and I've got mine. 1594 01:17:59,217 --> 01:18:02,553 You keep your crazy family away from me and I'll keep mine away from you! 1595 01:18:02,636 --> 01:18:05,306 Really? That's the way it is? 1596 01:18:05,389 --> 01:18:08,309 That's how two people who are partners are supposed to be? 1597 01:18:08,392 --> 01:18:10,603 What the hell is this? What is going on here? 1598 01:18:10,686 --> 01:18:12,688 Why is everything so separate with us? 1599 01:18:12,771 --> 01:18:14,565 How the hell would I know? You set it up. 1600 01:18:14,648 --> 01:18:15,774 -What? -Yeah. 1601 01:18:15,858 --> 01:18:18,569 Our lives were set up by you. I just went along with it. 1602 01:18:18,652 --> 01:18:20,488 How the hell did that happen? 1603 01:18:20,571 --> 01:18:21,947 I don't know. Ask your therapist! 1604 01:18:22,030 --> 01:18:25,368 My therapist is understudying the lead in the moronic musical! 1605 01:18:25,451 --> 01:18:26,577 I'm done with my therapist. 1606 01:18:26,660 --> 01:18:29,330 You set it up, and I went along, and that's how it works. 1607 01:18:29,413 --> 01:18:31,249 Now we're in the middle of my diner, arguing, 1608 01:18:31,332 --> 01:18:33,792 and everybody's going outside with their food and drinks. 1609 01:18:33,876 --> 01:18:35,294 -Where are you going? -Where? 1610 01:18:35,378 --> 01:18:37,796 I've got muffins in the oven at the inn for tomorrow 1611 01:18:37,880 --> 01:18:41,049 because Sandra Lee canceled because she talked to Ina Garten, 1612 01:18:41,133 --> 01:18:43,219 who said, "Don't go to the Dragonfly Inn. It's awful!" 1613 01:18:43,302 --> 01:18:47,306 Sandra's had a tough couple of years. She doesn't need to be embarrassed by you! 1614 01:18:48,432 --> 01:18:50,809 It's on the house tonight. Go! Go! 1615 01:18:52,603 --> 01:18:53,979 She was unbelievable. 1616 01:18:54,062 --> 01:18:57,400 Right out of left field, crazy Lorelai face appears. 1617 01:18:57,483 --> 01:18:58,609 I've seen it before, 1618 01:18:58,692 --> 01:19:01,153 but only when somebody cuts off her car or at a shoe sale. 1619 01:19:01,237 --> 01:19:03,822 I saw it when Marla Tipton's mom called you illegitimate. 1620 01:19:03,906 --> 01:19:06,825 She winged those brownie bites at her with scary accuracy. 1621 01:19:06,909 --> 01:19:09,537 A book. She totally freaked out over a book. 1622 01:19:09,620 --> 01:19:11,955 -So weird. -She knows I'm a writer. 1623 01:19:12,039 --> 01:19:14,542 She knows everything is fodder. Write what you know. 1624 01:19:14,625 --> 01:19:16,502 -You know what I know. -Lorelai? 1625 01:19:16,585 --> 01:19:20,881 Lorelai, yes. And me. And our life. I know that crap like the back of my hand. 1626 01:19:20,964 --> 01:19:23,216 - She just wouldn't listen. 1627 01:19:24,051 --> 01:19:25,344 - Hello? 1628 01:19:25,428 --> 01:19:26,929 -What? -I just called Logan. 1629 01:19:27,012 --> 01:19:28,431 -What? Why? -I don't know. 1630 01:19:28,514 --> 01:19:30,641 It just happened. Like a reflex. 1631 01:19:30,724 --> 01:19:34,562 Oh, my God. This is what I do. I get upset and I call Logan. 1632 01:19:34,645 --> 01:19:37,731 Well, what I used to do, because now she might answer. 1633 01:19:37,815 --> 01:19:39,233 - She answers his cell? 1634 01:19:39,317 --> 01:19:41,694 -Hello? Rory? -Crap! I did it again. 1635 01:19:41,777 --> 01:19:43,821 - Are you kidding? - No. 1636 01:19:43,904 --> 01:19:46,114 Dial 911. I'm going insane. 1637 01:19:46,198 --> 01:19:47,575 This is who I am now? 1638 01:19:47,658 --> 01:19:50,786 That person you knew in your youth, who was smart and together, 1639 01:19:50,869 --> 01:19:53,414 she's been chewed up and spit out. You'll never see her again-- 1640 01:19:53,497 --> 01:19:55,332 --What is going on? 1641 01:19:55,416 --> 01:19:58,127 -Ah! Damn it! -Oh. Look, okay, you need to relax. 1642 01:19:58,210 --> 01:20:00,921 -You want a Lipitor? Zach got some. -No, I don't need it. 1643 01:20:01,004 --> 01:20:02,840 I need to be 20 again. 1644 01:20:02,923 --> 01:20:06,635 You should have seen us yesterday. It was so awful. 1645 01:20:06,719 --> 01:20:10,306 We were just in the middle of a cemetery, yelling at each other. 1646 01:20:10,389 --> 01:20:12,182 There were mourners all around us. 1647 01:20:12,265 --> 01:20:14,477 Well, their day wasn't so fun anyway. 1648 01:20:14,560 --> 01:20:17,438 -What am I gonna do? -Well, she'll calm down. 1649 01:20:18,981 --> 01:20:21,274 She looked at me the way she looks at Grandma. 1650 01:20:21,359 --> 01:20:24,612 - That hurt. - And, I mean... 1651 01:20:24,695 --> 01:20:26,238 I don't know what I was thinking. 1652 01:20:26,322 --> 01:20:29,658 I mean, of course she wouldn't want me to write about us. 1653 01:20:29,742 --> 01:20:34,079 I just... I couldn't acknowledge it because I want to do this so badly. 1654 01:20:34,163 --> 01:20:36,206 -I'm exhausted. -Hey. 1655 01:20:36,957 --> 01:20:38,542 -Yeah? -Am I in this book? 1656 01:20:38,626 --> 01:20:40,461 - Oh, don't start. 1657 01:20:40,544 --> 01:20:42,338 - Of course. - No, I got it. 1658 01:20:42,421 --> 01:20:44,297 -No, Lane. -Hey, stop calling. 1659 01:20:44,382 --> 01:20:46,049 What? She's calling me. 1660 01:20:46,133 --> 01:20:47,885 It's a reflex and we're gonna kick it. 1661 01:20:47,968 --> 01:20:50,053 We've got Lipitor, so you won't hear from her again. 1662 01:20:50,137 --> 01:20:51,221 Just put her on the phone. 1663 01:20:51,305 --> 01:20:52,639 - No. - Give me the phone. 1664 01:20:52,723 --> 01:20:54,892 -No. I'm protecting you for some reason. -It's okay. 1665 01:20:55,809 --> 01:20:56,810 Okay. 1666 01:20:59,021 --> 01:21:01,189 -Hey. -What is going on? 1667 01:21:01,273 --> 01:21:02,650 Nothing. Bad day. 1668 01:21:02,733 --> 01:21:04,568 Yeah, I heard about the cholesterol problem. 1669 01:21:04,652 --> 01:21:07,320 --Come on, Ace. 1670 01:21:07,405 --> 01:21:09,990 You called me a bunch today and four times last night. 1671 01:21:10,073 --> 01:21:11,742 You hung up every time. What is it? 1672 01:21:11,825 --> 01:21:14,495 Nothing. I had a thing with my mom. 1673 01:21:14,578 --> 01:21:16,205 Well, talk to me. I'm here. 1674 01:21:16,288 --> 01:21:19,625 I was just upset at her and I was needing to vent, 1675 01:21:19,708 --> 01:21:22,586 and I realized I can't call you anymore. 1676 01:21:22,670 --> 01:21:23,712 - Why? 1677 01:21:23,796 --> 01:21:26,465 - Logan! - I gotta take this outside. 1678 01:21:26,549 --> 01:21:28,133 Because she's there. 1679 01:21:28,216 --> 01:21:29,885 Rory... 1680 01:21:29,968 --> 01:21:30,969 She's there. 1681 01:21:31,887 --> 01:21:34,222 - Yeah. - That's why. 1682 01:21:35,849 --> 01:21:38,936 So, I guess we should say goodbye. 1683 01:21:39,019 --> 01:21:41,229 -If that's what you want. -Don't make this my thing. 1684 01:21:41,313 --> 01:21:43,356 -Sorry. -So that's it? 1685 01:21:43,441 --> 01:21:44,692 We're breaking up. 1686 01:21:45,734 --> 01:21:48,821 Except we can't break up... because we're nothing. 1687 01:21:57,871 --> 01:22:01,500 - God. - This adult stuff is hard, isn't it? 1688 01:22:02,626 --> 01:22:06,714 I wonder if the Thirtysomething Gang goes through crap like this. 1689 01:22:11,802 --> 01:22:13,345 Lorelai, it's Taylor. 1690 01:22:13,429 --> 01:22:16,014 You're probably not interested in the musical anymore, 1691 01:22:16,098 --> 01:22:18,266 but out of politeness, I'm letting you know 1692 01:22:18,350 --> 01:22:22,688 that Nat Compton and I went on retreat to Cape Cod last weekend, 1693 01:22:22,771 --> 01:22:24,648 and we've come up with a new song. 1694 01:22:24,732 --> 01:22:27,025 I'm inviting everyone on the advisory committee 1695 01:22:27,109 --> 01:22:29,528 to come by Miss Patty's tonight and give it a listen. 1696 01:22:29,612 --> 01:22:32,906 But please, please... leave the 'tude at home. 1697 01:22:39,079 --> 01:22:42,082 ♪ I know how everyone else's life ♪ 1698 01:22:42,165 --> 01:22:45,711 ♪ Is supposed to fly by ♪ 1699 01:22:48,338 --> 01:22:50,966 ♪ Then someone turns and says ♪ 1700 01:22:51,884 --> 01:22:54,386 ♪ What about you? ♪ 1701 01:22:57,014 --> 01:22:59,683 ♪ And I stand here ♪ 1702 01:22:59,767 --> 01:23:01,894 ♪ Mouth open ♪ 1703 01:23:01,977 --> 01:23:04,271 ♪ Mind blank ♪ 1704 01:23:06,857 --> 01:23:10,068 ♪ This should have all worked itself out ♪ 1705 01:23:10,152 --> 01:23:12,571 ♪ By now ♪ 1706 01:23:14,782 --> 01:23:18,827 ♪ The map of my life Should be clear and precise ♪ 1707 01:23:18,911 --> 01:23:20,871 ♪ With little red dashes ♪ 1708 01:23:20,954 --> 01:23:25,042 ♪ And circles so nice Showing roadblocks ♪ 1709 01:23:25,125 --> 01:23:27,503 ♪ And land mines ♪ 1710 01:23:31,715 --> 01:23:37,012 ♪ Oh, I am not unbreakable ♪ 1711 01:23:40,307 --> 01:23:43,894 ♪ I am breaking right now ♪ 1712 01:23:43,977 --> 01:23:47,606 ♪ Maybe everyone can't have the dream ♪ 1713 01:23:47,690 --> 01:23:50,984 ♪ Maybe everyone can't kiss the frog ♪ 1714 01:23:51,068 --> 01:23:55,864 ♪ Maybe it'll be me and a dog ♪ 1715 01:23:57,240 --> 01:24:00,327 ♪ And the little stuffed dolphins On the floor ♪ 1716 01:24:01,829 --> 01:24:04,832 ♪ And a little dog door ♪ 1717 01:24:08,210 --> 01:24:12,464 ♪ Oh, I am not unbreakable ♪ 1718 01:24:16,176 --> 01:24:20,138 ♪ I am breaking right now ♪ 1719 01:24:24,602 --> 01:24:28,521 ♪ I need to be unbreakable ♪ 1720 01:24:30,440 --> 01:24:31,859 ♪ Somehow ♪ 1721 01:24:34,653 --> 01:24:36,196 ♪ It's never ♪ 1722 01:24:38,574 --> 01:24:42,327 ♪ Or now ♪ 1723 01:24:53,463 --> 01:24:55,507 -This is a cut. -What a bore. 1724 01:25:00,345 --> 01:25:02,264 - Luke? - In here! 1725 01:25:04,432 --> 01:25:06,434 This shelf is driving me crazy. It wobbles. 1726 01:25:06,518 --> 01:25:07,895 I'm just trying to shore it up. 1727 01:25:07,978 --> 01:25:09,354 Right, good. 1728 01:25:10,272 --> 01:25:11,273 Um... 1729 01:25:12,482 --> 01:25:13,901 We need to talk. 1730 01:25:13,984 --> 01:25:16,278 I'm kind of in the middle of this thing. 1731 01:25:16,361 --> 01:25:17,988 I have to tell you something. 1732 01:25:20,490 --> 01:25:21,742 Okay, tell me. 1733 01:25:25,453 --> 01:25:26,997 I'm going away. 1734 01:25:27,581 --> 01:25:28,749 You're going away? 1735 01:25:29,708 --> 01:25:31,627 And I might be gone for a while. 1736 01:25:32,544 --> 01:25:35,547 -What's a while? -A few weeks. 1737 01:25:36,632 --> 01:25:39,259 -A few weeks? -Maybe longer. 1738 01:25:39,342 --> 01:25:41,386 Lorelai, what is this? 1739 01:25:42,429 --> 01:25:45,140 I'm gonna do Wild. 1740 01:25:45,223 --> 01:25:46,850 -What? -Wild. 1741 01:25:47,768 --> 01:25:49,477 -I don't... You mean the movie? -The book. 1742 01:25:49,561 --> 01:25:50,688 What's the difference? 1743 01:25:50,771 --> 01:25:53,774 The movie took liberties. The book's pure. I'm gonna do the book. 1744 01:25:53,857 --> 01:25:56,276 But what does that mean, you're doing Wild? 1745 01:25:56,359 --> 01:26:00,155 -I'm going to go to the place. -The Pacific Crest Trail? 1746 01:26:00,739 --> 01:26:02,032 And I'm gonna walk it. 1747 01:26:02,115 --> 01:26:04,242 -Or hike it. -Sure, let's go with that. 1748 01:26:04,326 --> 01:26:06,912 -That trail's 2,000 miles long. -I won't do it all. 1749 01:26:06,995 --> 01:26:08,121 -And it's a trail. -I know. 1750 01:26:08,205 --> 01:26:10,123 -It's outdoors. It's in nature. -I know. 1751 01:26:10,207 --> 01:26:11,792 There's dirt, bugs, animals. 1752 01:26:11,875 --> 01:26:13,711 -I know. -Mosquitos, rivers. 1753 01:26:13,794 --> 01:26:16,129 -I know. -You have to carry your own backpack. 1754 01:26:16,213 --> 01:26:17,923 -By yourself. -I know. 1755 01:26:18,006 --> 01:26:20,467 -You can't take Dewey and Brandon. -Their mothers wouldn't let me. 1756 01:26:20,550 --> 01:26:22,761 -You have to sleep on the ground. -I know. 1757 01:26:22,844 --> 01:26:24,054 -You cook your food. -I know. 1758 01:26:24,137 --> 01:26:25,806 -You boil your own water. -I know. 1759 01:26:25,889 --> 01:26:27,474 -You get water from a stream. -I know. 1760 01:26:27,557 --> 01:26:28,851 -That's in nature. -I know. 1761 01:26:31,478 --> 01:26:33,521 Well, I guess you know what's out there. 1762 01:26:34,690 --> 01:26:35,941 And you're still gonna go? 1763 01:26:36,859 --> 01:26:37,901 Yeah. 1764 01:26:38,944 --> 01:26:39,987 Why? 1765 01:26:43,573 --> 01:26:45,909 Because it's never... 1766 01:26:47,535 --> 01:26:48,746 or now.