1
00:00:18,186 --> 00:00:20,188
<i>Please, Luke.
Please, please, please.</i>

2
00:00:20,397 --> 00:00:21,606
<i>How many cups
have you had this morning?</i>

3
00:00:21,815 --> 00:00:22,649
<i>- None.
- Plus?</i>

4
00:00:22,857 --> 00:00:23,858
<i>Five,
but yours is better.</i>

5
00:00:24,067 --> 00:00:25,819
<i>I got a kiss.
And I shoplifted.</i>

6
00:00:26,027 --> 00:00:26,695
<i>Honestly, Lorelai,</i>

7
00:00:26,903 --> 00:00:28,655
<i>it's not your looks
that keep them away.
Think about that.</i>

8
00:00:28,863 --> 00:00:31,992
<i>People die, we pay.
People crash cars, we pay.</i>

9
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:33,284
<i>People lose a foot, we pay.</i>

10
00:00:33,493 --> 00:00:34,494
<i>Well, at least
you have your new slogan.</i>

11
00:00:34,703 --> 00:00:36,162
<i>- Did you do something slutty?
- I'm not that happy.</i>

12
00:00:36,371 --> 00:00:38,123
<i>People are
particularly stupid today.</i>

13
00:00:38,331 --> 00:00:39,708
<i>- Copper boom!
- Norman Mailer, I'm pregnant!</i>

14
00:00:39,916 --> 00:00:41,334
<i>- Luke can waltz?
- Luke can waltz.</i>

15
00:00:41,543 --> 00:00:43,336
<i>I just want
you to know I'm in.
I am all in.</i>

16
00:00:43,503 --> 00:00:45,296
<i>It'd be like
the first 15 minutes of</i>
Saving Private Ryan,

17
00:00:45,505 --> 00:00:46,381
<i>but at least those guys
got to be in France.</i>

18
00:00:46,589 --> 00:00:47,549
<i>I am not
going to Harvard.</i>

19
00:00:47,757 --> 00:00:49,134
<i>I had sex,
but I'm not going
to Harvard!</i>

20
00:00:49,342 --> 00:00:50,135
<i>- You were still a child.
- I stopped</i>

21
00:00:50,343 --> 00:00:51,553
<i>being a child the minute
the strip turned pink.</i>

22
00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:52,637
<i>You jump,
I jump, Jack.</i>

23
00:00:52,846 --> 00:00:54,681
<i>Eternal damnation
is what I'm risking
for my rock and roll.</i>

24
00:00:54,889 --> 00:00:55,765
<i>Oy with
the poodles already.</i>

25
00:00:55,974 --> 00:00:57,350
<i>Because I love you,
you idiot.</i>

26
00:00:58,435 --> 00:01:00,270
<i>I smell snow.</i>

27
00:01:06,818 --> 00:01:09,112
♪ <i>La, la, la</i>

28
00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:11,531
<i>♪ La, la, la</i>

29
00:01:11,740 --> 00:01:14,951
<i>♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la</i>

30
00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:18,997
<i>♪ La, la, la</i>

31
00:01:19,205 --> 00:01:21,666
<i>♪ La, la, la</i>

32
00:01:21,916 --> 00:01:25,587
<i>♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la</i>

33
00:01:27,839 --> 00:01:31,301
<i>♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la</i>

34
00:01:31,509 --> 00:01:32,844
<i>♪ La, la, la ♪</i>

35
00:01:33,053 --> 00:01:34,512
Hey!

36
00:01:35,638 --> 00:01:37,474
That's how you look
when you get off a plane?

37
00:01:37,682 --> 00:01:38,933
That's how
you say hello?

38
00:01:39,142 --> 00:01:40,518
You've been stuffed
in a glorified tin can

39
00:01:40,727 --> 00:01:42,312
for the last seven hours
surrounded by people

40
00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:45,690
with consumption,
diphtheria, scabies,
hummus dip, rabid dogs,

41
00:01:45,899 --> 00:01:48,818
drugged up children
attacking your chair,
and stealing your change.

42
00:01:49,027 --> 00:01:50,195
What airline
are you flying?

43
00:01:50,403 --> 00:01:51,488
You should look
drawn and blotchy.

44
00:01:51,696 --> 00:01:54,157
You should be singing
"I Dreamed a Dream"
with a bad haircut

45
00:01:54,365 --> 00:01:56,910
while selling yourself
to a bunch of
French dockworkers.

46
00:01:57,118 --> 00:01:58,787
But instead,
you look perfect.

47
00:01:58,995 --> 00:01:59,788
Admit it.
You've been gooped.

48
00:01:59,996 --> 00:02:00,914
I have not
been gooped.

49
00:02:01,122 --> 00:02:03,583
You're doing yoga
in the aisles wearing
cashmere sweatpants

50
00:02:03,792 --> 00:02:06,336
while your comfort dog
watches <i>Zoolander 2</i>
on his watch.

51
00:02:06,544 --> 00:02:08,296
I do blood clot
prevention foot pumps

52
00:02:08,546 --> 00:02:10,256
wearing my Yonah
Schimmel Knishery
baseball cap

53
00:02:10,465 --> 00:02:11,925
while toothpaste dries up
a zit on my chin.

54
00:02:12,133 --> 00:02:13,176
Wow! Winded!

55
00:02:13,384 --> 00:02:14,886
- Haven't done that
for a while.
- Felt good.

56
00:02:17,430 --> 00:02:18,765
I've missed you, kid.

57
00:02:18,973 --> 00:02:20,141
Missed you, too.

58
00:02:20,350 --> 00:02:21,559
How long's it been?

59
00:02:21,810 --> 00:02:23,103
Feels like years.

60
00:02:24,521 --> 00:02:26,439
Coffee and tacos.

61
00:02:26,648 --> 00:02:27,941
Princess Charlotte
iced tea spoons.

62
00:02:28,149 --> 00:02:29,400
Mmm!

63
00:02:29,609 --> 00:02:31,111
All right, shall we
get it out of the way?

64
00:02:31,319 --> 00:02:32,403
Might as well.

65
00:02:33,071 --> 00:02:35,490
One day? That's all?

66
00:02:35,698 --> 00:02:36,866
I'm sorry!

67
00:02:37,075 --> 00:02:38,952
You miss Christmas
and Thanksgiving

68
00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:41,121
and all I get is
a one-day visit?

69
00:02:41,329 --> 00:02:42,330
What am I,
chopped liver?

70
00:02:42,539 --> 00:02:44,541
I have to be on
the red-eye to London
tomorrow night.

71
00:02:44,749 --> 00:02:46,334
- London again.
- For work.

72
00:02:46,543 --> 00:02:48,503
<i>♪ And the cat's in the cradle
And the silver spoon ♪</i>

73
00:02:48,711 --> 00:02:49,546
Oh, now, Emily.

74
00:02:49,754 --> 00:02:52,006
Oh, wow! Nicely played.
All right, you win.

75
00:02:52,215 --> 00:02:54,134
So, we have limited
time. Should we skip
the town tour?

76
00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:55,677
Now we can't skip
the town tour.

77
00:02:55,885 --> 00:02:57,220
Well, we'll keep
it short.

78
00:02:57,428 --> 00:02:59,848
- Le Chat Club
closed due to rats.
- Again?

79
00:03:00,056 --> 00:03:02,142
- We got parking meters.
- Where?

80
00:03:02,350 --> 00:03:03,726
Well, no one would pay
so they took them out.

81
00:03:03,935 --> 00:03:05,061
This town is
mob ruled.

82
00:03:05,228 --> 00:03:07,856
AI's Pancake World won
best Christmas
decorations again.

83
00:03:08,064 --> 00:03:09,816
Well, it's that
nativity scene
with the eggplant Jesus.

84
00:03:10,024 --> 00:03:11,818
- You can't beat it.
- There's a debate
going on

85
00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:13,486
whether or not to take
the phone booth out.

86
00:03:13,695 --> 00:03:14,904
But where would
Superman change

87
00:03:15,113 --> 00:03:16,614
when he comes
to save our town
from Ben Affleck?

88
00:03:16,865 --> 00:03:18,366
I made the same
excellent point.

89
00:03:18,616 --> 00:03:19,659
What's with
the signs?

90
00:03:19,868 --> 00:03:21,327
Ooh, I saved
the best for last.

91
00:03:21,536 --> 00:03:24,873
Taylor has decided
that septic systems
are beneath us

92
00:03:25,081 --> 00:03:26,833
and he wants to
go full-on sewer.

93
00:03:27,041 --> 00:03:28,001
How can we do that?

94
00:03:28,209 --> 00:03:30,545
Well, first, he's going
door to door collecting

95
00:03:30,753 --> 00:03:32,630
people's personal
septic tank
horror stories.

96
00:03:32,839 --> 00:03:34,507
- Oh, Lord!
- Then, he'll compile them,

97
00:03:34,716 --> 00:03:36,801
and then he and a panel
of hand-picked people
will stage

98
00:03:37,010 --> 00:03:39,554
septic testimonial
re-enactments for
the county assessor.

99
00:03:39,762 --> 00:03:41,514
Are you just telling me
this stuff to get me to
stay longer?

100
00:03:41,723 --> 00:03:42,849
- Is it working?
- Kind of.

101
00:03:43,433 --> 00:03:44,601
Hi, Miss Patty!

102
00:03:44,809 --> 00:03:47,478
Rory!
You look fabulous!

103
00:03:47,687 --> 00:03:49,230
She just got off
a plane!

104
00:03:49,439 --> 00:03:51,316
Oh! That's
my work phone.

105
00:03:52,859 --> 00:03:53,693
It's not ringing.

106
00:03:53,902 --> 00:03:54,903
I know.

107
00:03:55,612 --> 00:03:56,654
- It's not ringing,
either.
- I know.

108
00:03:56,863 --> 00:03:58,072
You've got more burners
than Omar Little.

109
00:03:58,281 --> 00:03:59,407
I got a personal phone,
a work phone,

110
00:03:59,616 --> 00:04:00,825
and the only phone
that gets reception

111
00:04:01,034 --> 00:04:02,202
in Stars Hollow.
Theoretically.

112
00:04:02,410 --> 00:04:05,038
Yes well, the fact that
the entire town was
actually constructed

113
00:04:05,288 --> 00:04:08,208
in a giant snow globe
probably has an effect
on your bar count.

114
00:04:08,416 --> 00:04:09,626
Ha!

115
00:04:09,834 --> 00:04:12,337
Hello? Hello?
Um...

116
00:04:12,545 --> 00:04:14,088
Damn! Hello?

117
00:04:15,089 --> 00:04:16,507
You're breaking up.

118
00:04:16,966 --> 00:04:18,343
Oh, come on.

119
00:04:19,344 --> 00:04:21,554
Hello?

120
00:04:21,763 --> 00:04:24,015
Hold on! Hello?

121
00:04:24,224 --> 00:04:26,684
Crap! Hello?

122
00:04:26,935 --> 00:04:28,937
Uh, can you hear me now?
Can you hear me--

123
00:04:29,145 --> 00:04:30,438
Yes! Hi! Great!

124
00:04:30,647 --> 00:04:32,440
Um, so, how are you?

125
00:04:33,149 --> 00:04:34,901
Hello?

126
00:04:35,109 --> 00:04:38,571
I'm heading
to the trees! I'm...
I'm heading to the trees.

127
00:04:38,780 --> 00:04:41,866
Okay, I'm at the trees.
Hello? Hello?

128
00:04:42,659 --> 00:04:44,744
I'm gonna try Doose's.
You coming?

129
00:04:44,953 --> 00:04:46,537
- Nah! I just hit
my steps.
- Okay.

130
00:04:47,956 --> 00:04:49,374
Um, hello?

131
00:04:49,582 --> 00:04:52,252
Are you still there?
Okay, flip phone!

132
00:04:54,379 --> 00:04:58,091
Hi! Sorry,
it's Rory Gilmore again.
I think Ingrid just--

133
00:04:58,299 --> 00:05:00,885
Hello? Hello?

134
00:05:01,094 --> 00:05:02,387
Hello? Crap!

135
00:05:03,596 --> 00:05:04,931
Hello?

136
00:05:05,139 --> 00:05:06,266
Hello?

137
00:05:06,474 --> 00:05:08,643
Oh, yes!
Sure, she can.

138
00:05:08,851 --> 00:05:10,478
Okay, on this number,
please. Thank you.

139
00:05:10,687 --> 00:05:12,939
Rory! Hey! I didn't know
you were coming in today.

140
00:05:13,147 --> 00:05:14,941
Oh, it's just
a super quick
in and out.

141
00:05:15,149 --> 00:05:17,235
- Cabbage.
- What? Oh.

142
00:05:18,278 --> 00:05:19,279
Come again.

143
00:05:19,487 --> 00:05:21,322
Um, so tell me,
what is going on
with you?

144
00:05:21,531 --> 00:05:23,116
- Oh, you don't wanna know.
- Uh-oh.

145
00:05:23,324 --> 00:05:24,575
Yeah, Zach got
a promotion.

146
00:05:24,784 --> 00:05:25,743
My God! Why?

147
00:05:25,952 --> 00:05:27,829
- I don't know.
I think they like him.
- Poor guy.

148
00:05:28,037 --> 00:05:30,456
Yeah,
he's a route supervisor
now. Has to wear a tie.

149
00:05:30,665 --> 00:05:31,332
I'm so sorry.

150
00:05:31,541 --> 00:05:32,792
It's fairly
devastating.

151
00:05:33,001 --> 00:05:34,460
I tell him he looks like
a young Leonard Cohen,

152
00:05:34,669 --> 00:05:35,670
but he actually just
looks like his dad.

153
00:05:35,878 --> 00:05:36,796
Sorry.

154
00:05:37,005 --> 00:05:37,755
- Yeah.
- Hello?

155
00:05:37,964 --> 00:05:39,382
Oh, Ingrid.
Finally!

156
00:05:41,634 --> 00:05:43,177
It's so good to
finally connect.

157
00:05:44,470 --> 00:05:46,306
Lorelai, I'm glad
I ran into you.

158
00:05:46,514 --> 00:05:47,473
Your house is
that way, Kirk.

159
00:05:47,682 --> 00:05:49,017
I did not
get lost again.

160
00:05:49,225 --> 00:05:50,393
I wanted you to
be one of
the first to know

161
00:05:50,601 --> 00:05:51,936
that I've started
a new business.

162
00:05:52,145 --> 00:05:53,187
It's a ride
share business.

163
00:05:53,396 --> 00:05:55,148
I call it Ooo-ber.

164
00:05:55,356 --> 00:05:57,317
Uh-oh. There's
already an Uber, Kirk.

165
00:05:57,525 --> 00:06:00,069
No, not Uber.
Ooo-ber.

166
00:06:00,278 --> 00:06:01,487
Three "O's"
instead of a "U."

167
00:06:01,696 --> 00:06:02,697
Okay, but it's, uh--

168
00:06:02,905 --> 00:06:03,698
Ooo-ber.

169
00:06:03,948 --> 00:06:05,033
Right. But it's the--

170
00:06:05,241 --> 00:06:06,367
Ooo-ber.

171
00:06:06,576 --> 00:06:08,161
It's a service where
people can request

172
00:06:08,369 --> 00:06:09,704
a ride and I will come
and pick them up.

173
00:06:09,912 --> 00:06:10,747
Like Uber.

174
00:06:10,955 --> 00:06:12,498
Except it's Ooo-ber.

175
00:06:12,874 --> 00:06:13,958
It's the same thing.

176
00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:15,543
- No, it's not.
- Kirk.

177
00:06:15,752 --> 00:06:17,170
People use an app
to call a car.

178
00:06:17,378 --> 00:06:18,171
I have no app.

179
00:06:18,379 --> 00:06:19,339
Then how do
they get a car?

180
00:06:19,547 --> 00:06:21,007
They call my mother,
and then she calls me,

181
00:06:21,215 --> 00:06:22,342
and I find a car
and I pick them
right up.

182
00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:24,010
So it's a much
worse version of Uber.

183
00:06:24,218 --> 00:06:25,636
And it's pronounced
Ooo-ber.

184
00:06:25,845 --> 00:06:26,804
- Stop making that sound.
- All right.

185
00:06:27,013 --> 00:06:28,431
Well, you've got
my mom's number.

186
00:06:28,639 --> 00:06:29,891
Now if you'll
excuse me...

187
00:06:31,017 --> 00:06:32,518
It is past
Petal's bedtime.

188
00:06:32,727 --> 00:06:33,770
Bye, Petal.

189
00:06:36,689 --> 00:06:37,774
When did Kirk
get a pig?

190
00:06:37,982 --> 00:06:39,942
Babette heard him
and Lulu talking
about having a baby,

191
00:06:40,151 --> 00:06:41,402
so the whole town
chipped in.

192
00:06:41,611 --> 00:06:42,862
We figured it bought us
a couple of years.

193
00:06:43,071 --> 00:06:44,155
- Very smart.
- Ready?

194
00:06:44,489 --> 00:06:45,406
Hold on.

195
00:06:45,615 --> 00:06:49,285
I'm not really home
till I get my
<i>Stars Hollow Gazette.</i>

196
00:06:49,911 --> 00:06:50,912
Christmas edition.

197
00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:52,372
Manger news,
Santa's wishes,

198
00:06:52,580 --> 00:06:54,374
eggnog checkpoints,
and...

199
00:06:54,582 --> 00:06:55,666
The Christmas poem.

200
00:06:55,875 --> 00:06:56,793
Same one every year.

201
00:06:57,043 --> 00:06:58,002
Every single year.

202
00:06:58,211 --> 00:06:59,504
So good to be home.

203
00:07:01,547 --> 00:07:02,173
What?

204
00:07:03,841 --> 00:07:05,385
I smell snow.

205
00:07:20,149 --> 00:07:22,235
<i>♪ Nothing looks so pretty as</i>

206
00:07:22,568 --> 00:07:24,779
<i>♪ The winter
stars a-glittering</i>

207
00:07:24,987 --> 00:07:29,242
<i>♪ Shining on
a freshly fallen snow</i>

208
00:07:29,450 --> 00:07:32,161
<i>♪ When the blue
light of the moon</i>

209
00:07:32,412 --> 00:07:35,915
<i>♪ Is giving off
a loving winter glow</i>

210
00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:41,879
<i>♪ Such a tender feeling when</i>

211
00:07:42,088 --> 00:07:44,424
<i>♪ The candlelight
a-flickering</i>

212
00:07:44,632 --> 00:07:48,594
<i>♪ The ember window
calls you home</i>

213
00:07:48,803 --> 00:07:51,806
<i>♪ And the fireplace
is crackling</i>

214
00:07:52,014 --> 00:07:55,935
<i>♪ And giving off
a warming winter glow</i>

215
00:07:56,936 --> 00:07:58,479
<i>♪ Summer with its nights</i>

216
00:07:58,688 --> 00:08:01,691
<i>♪ That last forever
has its charm</i>

217
00:08:01,899 --> 00:08:06,404
<i>♪ Fall with golden leaves
That gather, too</i>

218
00:08:06,612 --> 00:08:11,492
<i>♪ Spring is all the brighter
After rip storms have blown</i>

219
00:08:11,701 --> 00:08:15,246
<i>♪ But winter has
a magic of its own ♪</i>

220
00:08:23,546 --> 00:08:25,131
- Got it?
- Yup.

221
00:08:26,924 --> 00:08:27,967
Are you sure?

222
00:08:28,176 --> 00:08:28,968
Oh, yes.

223
00:08:29,177 --> 00:08:31,554
Come on.
Let's get in
out of the snow!

224
00:08:31,762 --> 00:08:32,930
It's cold.

225
00:08:36,684 --> 00:08:39,103
Luke's gonna be so
excited to see you.

226
00:08:39,395 --> 00:08:40,271
I can't
wait to see him.

227
00:08:44,567 --> 00:08:45,776
Hello, Rabbi.

228
00:08:47,195 --> 00:08:49,322
Oh, Paul Anka,
what is she making
you wear now?

229
00:08:49,530 --> 00:08:50,948
No, no. This one
was his idea.

230
00:08:51,157 --> 00:08:53,117
Aw, don't feel bad.
She did the same thing
to me.

231
00:08:53,326 --> 00:08:54,785
- Okay, get ready.
- For what?

232
00:08:54,994 --> 00:08:56,329
- Super-proud Luke.
- What?

233
00:08:56,996 --> 00:08:59,290
Luke! It's
a Christmas miracle!

234
00:08:59,499 --> 00:09:01,417
Ah! There she is,
the <i>New Yorker</i> writer!

235
00:09:01,626 --> 00:09:02,376
Super-proud!

236
00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:03,753
It was
just one Talk of
the Town piece.

237
00:09:03,961 --> 00:09:05,546
Oh, one Talk of
the Town piece?
Come on.

238
00:09:05,755 --> 00:09:07,507
It was terrific.
And that woman
you wrote about--

239
00:09:07,798 --> 00:09:08,758
Naomi Shropshire.

240
00:09:08,966 --> 00:09:10,259
Yes, yes! I've never
heard of her.

241
00:09:10,468 --> 00:09:11,385
But now I feel like
I've met her.

242
00:09:11,594 --> 00:09:12,386
Well, I appreciate that.

243
00:09:12,595 --> 00:09:14,931
I've never read
the <i>New Yorker</i> before,
but now, every week.

244
00:09:15,139 --> 00:09:15,973
I'm glad.

245
00:09:16,182 --> 00:09:18,267
And I subscribed to it.
Who says print is dead?

246
00:09:18,476 --> 00:09:20,144
- Only the world.
- Well, what does
the world--

247
00:09:21,103 --> 00:09:22,480
- You're eating?
- Just tacos.

248
00:09:22,688 --> 00:09:24,398
- Tacos are tiny.
- I'm making a whole
dinner here.

249
00:09:24,607 --> 00:09:25,775
- Wow. So I'm fat?
- What?

250
00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:27,276
- Body shaming.
- I am not body shaming.

251
00:09:27,527 --> 00:09:29,028
- Trigger warnings!
- Oh, for Christ's sake.

252
00:09:29,362 --> 00:09:30,321
War on Christmas!

253
00:09:30,530 --> 00:09:31,572
I am making
two main courses

254
00:09:31,781 --> 00:09:33,282
because you told me
to make two main courses.

255
00:09:33,491 --> 00:09:34,242
What two main courses?

256
00:09:34,450 --> 00:09:35,993
Uh, mac and cheese,
parmesan cutlets...

257
00:09:36,202 --> 00:09:37,495
- With garlic bread?
- And tater tots!

258
00:09:37,787 --> 00:09:38,663
I am not making
tater tots.

259
00:09:38,871 --> 00:09:40,164
- Why not?
- We need sustenance!

260
00:09:40,373 --> 00:09:41,207
You're eating tacos!

261
00:09:41,415 --> 00:09:42,458
Tater tots go great
with tacos.

262
00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:43,834
Tater tots are
great in tacos.

263
00:09:44,043 --> 00:09:45,127
- Yes!
<i>- No!</i>

264
00:09:45,336 --> 00:09:46,587
- Hey! I mean it!
- They're organic.

265
00:09:46,796 --> 00:09:48,047
All right,
negotiation's over!

266
00:09:48,256 --> 00:09:50,216
Put the tater tots back,
finish your tacos,

267
00:09:50,424 --> 00:09:52,009
wash your hands,
dinner's almost ready!

268
00:09:52,218 --> 00:09:53,678
Ah! And I saw you grab
those mini donuts.

269
00:09:53,886 --> 00:09:55,096
Put 'em down right now.

270
00:09:55,304 --> 00:09:57,515
I cannot believe
the conversations
I have in this room.

271
00:09:57,807 --> 00:09:59,225
I thought cooking
was supposed to be
relaxing.

272
00:09:59,433 --> 00:10:00,851
Oh, no. You just--

273
00:10:01,060 --> 00:10:03,688
Don't put that song on
and then disappear into
Rory's room. Hey!

274
00:10:03,896 --> 00:10:04,897
At least
turn it down!

275
00:10:05,106 --> 00:10:06,399
- Hey, did my boxes
get here?
- Behind the rack.

276
00:10:06,607 --> 00:10:07,400
Great!

277
00:10:07,733 --> 00:10:09,569
So, you finally
did it, huh?

278
00:10:09,777 --> 00:10:11,696
Finally gave up
her Brooklyn pad?

279
00:10:11,904 --> 00:10:14,615
I did.
Lena Dunham will just have
to get along without me.

280
00:10:14,824 --> 00:10:16,409
- Are you gonna miss it?
- A little.

281
00:10:16,617 --> 00:10:17,535
I'm gonna miss it.

282
00:10:17,743 --> 00:10:21,706
It had that early American
tenement shtetl
slash <i>Trainspotting</i> vibe

283
00:10:21,914 --> 00:10:23,708
that every mother wants
for her little girl.

284
00:10:23,958 --> 00:10:25,585
It was a perfectly
decent apartment.

285
00:10:25,793 --> 00:10:27,420
I liked how you had
to avoid touching the walls

286
00:10:27,753 --> 00:10:28,963
or your clothes
would stick to them.

287
00:10:29,171 --> 00:10:30,756
- One wall.
- See, in some apartments,

288
00:10:31,090 --> 00:10:32,717
you don't have to
avoid any walls at all.

289
00:10:32,925 --> 00:10:34,760
It was a great place.
I just was never there.

290
00:10:34,969 --> 00:10:36,971
Do you know
how many nights I actually
spent there this year?

291
00:10:37,179 --> 00:10:38,931
- Three? Eighteen?
- No. No.

292
00:10:39,140 --> 00:10:39,932
- Forty-six?
- No.

293
00:10:40,141 --> 00:10:41,767
<i>Is this like</i>
The Price is Right
<i>where if I'm a little under</i>

294
00:10:41,976 --> 00:10:43,436
I win, over, I lose?

295
00:10:43,644 --> 00:10:45,479
I don't actually know
exactly how many nights,
okay?

296
00:10:45,688 --> 00:10:47,690
But it was not a lot.
And now the building's
going condo.

297
00:10:47,898 --> 00:10:50,693
And I'm not ready to buy
a condo, so it just seemed
like the right time to say...

298
00:10:50,943 --> 00:10:52,570
- Bye-bye, Brooklyn.
- Bye-bye, Brooklyn.

299
00:10:52,862 --> 00:10:54,030
This box is open.

300
00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:55,406
Damn that TSA!

301
00:10:55,615 --> 00:10:57,199
Really? You went
through my stuff?

302
00:10:57,408 --> 00:10:59,994
I did. And I must say,
I found it
very disappointing.

303
00:11:00,202 --> 00:11:01,829
You found my personal
items disappointing?

304
00:11:02,038 --> 00:11:03,664
Yeah, I thought there'd
be something fun in there,

305
00:11:03,873 --> 00:11:05,166
you know, like
a treasure map

306
00:11:05,374 --> 00:11:06,917
or the prequel to
<i>Huckleberry Finn</i>

307
00:11:07,126 --> 00:11:09,629
where Huck is a Klan leader
and terrified of water.

308
00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:11,297
I think it's kind of
exciting, you know?

309
00:11:11,505 --> 00:11:13,424
No apartment,
no rent, no ties.

310
00:11:13,633 --> 00:11:15,301
I could crash here,
I could crash at Lane's.

311
00:11:15,509 --> 00:11:18,220
I feel like this is
my time to be rootless

312
00:11:18,429 --> 00:11:20,056
and just see
where life takes me,

313
00:11:20,264 --> 00:11:22,975
and travel wherever
there's a story to write.

314
00:11:23,184 --> 00:11:25,186
I just wish
I had remembered
to label my boxes

315
00:11:25,394 --> 00:11:27,104
because now I know
where nothing is.

316
00:11:27,313 --> 00:11:29,190
My boots,
my coats,
my underwear...

317
00:11:29,398 --> 00:11:30,816
You've no idea where
your underwear is?

318
00:11:31,025 --> 00:11:32,026
Could be at Lane's.

319
00:11:32,234 --> 00:11:33,778
You've been
without your underwear
since you moved?

320
00:11:33,986 --> 00:11:34,945
Don't judge.

321
00:11:35,154 --> 00:11:36,322
I'm Gwen freakin' Stefani.

322
00:11:36,530 --> 00:11:37,531
Do you want to borrow
some underwear?

323
00:11:37,740 --> 00:11:39,033
I'd like to stop talking
about underwear.

324
00:11:39,283 --> 00:11:40,868
I'm looking for
my lucky outfit.

325
00:11:41,077 --> 00:11:43,788
I think any outfit you
wear without underwear is
gonna be your lucky outfit.

326
00:11:43,996 --> 00:11:45,998
I have this big meeting
coming up with Conde Nast,

327
00:11:46,207 --> 00:11:48,626
and I have this one particular
look that always makes me
feel like Diane Sawyer.

328
00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:50,044
Is it a Mike Nichols mask?

329
00:11:50,252 --> 00:11:51,796
<i>I'll get it!</i>

330
00:11:52,004 --> 00:11:53,005
What's this?

331
00:11:53,214 --> 00:11:56,717
Oh! That is a box of
<i>New Yorker</i> magazines
with your fancy piece in it.

332
00:11:56,926 --> 00:11:57,885
Box one of six.

333
00:11:58,094 --> 00:11:59,720
- You're kidding.
- Super-proud!

334
00:11:59,929 --> 00:12:01,180
Hey, that guy's here.

335
00:12:01,389 --> 00:12:02,139
What guy?

336
00:12:02,348 --> 00:12:03,808
You know...
Uh, Jeffrey.

337
00:12:04,058 --> 00:12:05,685
- Who? Who?
- Allen? Billy?

338
00:12:05,893 --> 00:12:08,229
There's
nothing remotely similar
about those names.

339
00:12:08,437 --> 00:12:09,605
You know.
Him. Your guy.

340
00:12:09,814 --> 00:12:10,439
Paul?

341
00:12:10,648 --> 00:12:11,816
- Paul. Yes, Paul.
- Paul's not here.

342
00:12:12,024 --> 00:12:13,025
<i>- Paul's here.</i>
- Who's Paul?

343
00:12:13,234 --> 00:12:14,735
Paul, my...
Paul, my boyfriend?

344
00:12:14,944 --> 00:12:16,821
Oh, crap!
Paul is here!

345
00:12:17,029 --> 00:12:18,614
- Why is Paul here?
- I invited him for dinner,

346
00:12:18,823 --> 00:12:22,451
and I totally forgot.
Crap, crap, crap!

347
00:12:22,702 --> 00:12:25,204
I can't believe
you didn't remember
Rory's boyfriend Paul.

348
00:12:27,081 --> 00:12:28,624
You came.

349
00:12:28,833 --> 00:12:30,209
Of course I came.

350
00:12:31,919 --> 00:12:33,671
- For you.
- So beautiful.

351
00:12:33,879 --> 00:12:35,840
And indigenous to Peru.
Fun fact.

352
00:12:36,048 --> 00:12:36,966
So fun.

353
00:12:37,174 --> 00:12:38,551
Hey. Look who's here.

354
00:12:38,759 --> 00:12:40,094
Paul! Wow!

355
00:12:40,302 --> 00:12:41,345
- So good to see you.
- You, too.

356
00:12:41,554 --> 00:12:42,638
Thank you for
the invite.

357
00:12:42,847 --> 00:12:43,639
Is your hair
different?

358
00:12:43,848 --> 00:12:44,890
- Uh, no.
<i>- Lose some weight?</i>

359
00:12:45,307 --> 00:12:46,559
- Nope.
- Gain some weight?

360
00:12:46,767 --> 00:12:47,893
I'm going to put
these in some water.

361
00:12:48,102 --> 00:12:49,854
- Come on, Paul.
- Yes, I will follow.

362
00:12:52,523 --> 00:12:54,066
I've never seen
that boy before
in my life.

363
00:12:54,275 --> 00:12:55,526
- See?
- They've been
together for months.

364
00:12:55,735 --> 00:12:57,278
- I think it's been a year.
- He's been to the house!

365
00:12:57,486 --> 00:12:58,362
I know!

366
00:12:58,571 --> 00:13:01,031
He's like a superhero,
but his power is that
you can't remember him

367
00:13:01,323 --> 00:13:02,366
no matter how much time
you spend with him.

368
00:13:02,533 --> 00:13:04,076
Kind of like every
Marvel movie ever.

369
00:13:05,327 --> 00:13:06,537
- Care for something
to drink, Pete?
- Paul.

370
00:13:06,746 --> 00:13:07,663
Paul. I'm--

371
00:13:07,955 --> 00:13:09,498
Pete is our, uh,
dog's friend.

372
00:13:09,707 --> 00:13:11,000
Our dog's name is Paul.

373
00:13:11,208 --> 00:13:12,585
- Last name Anka.
- Weirdly close
to my last name.

374
00:13:12,918 --> 00:13:14,128
Right. Very close.

375
00:13:14,378 --> 00:13:15,546
This is all
I could find.

376
00:13:15,796 --> 00:13:16,797
- That'll do.
- Okay.

377
00:13:17,006 --> 00:13:17,840
- Red okay...
- Paul.

378
00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:19,258
I got it now.
Paul, red, Paul?

379
00:13:19,467 --> 00:13:20,384
Uh, red sounds good.

380
00:13:21,051 --> 00:13:22,344
- Oh, hey, Luke.
<i>- Yeah.</i>

381
00:13:22,553 --> 00:13:23,929
- I brought it.
- You...

382
00:13:24,138 --> 00:13:25,556
The wrench. The,
uh, antique wrench

383
00:13:25,765 --> 00:13:27,016
we talked about
the last time I was here.

384
00:13:27,224 --> 00:13:28,434
- Remember?
- Uh-huh.

385
00:13:28,642 --> 00:13:29,852
You know, we went on
that fishing trip on
your boat.

386
00:13:30,060 --> 00:13:32,438
And you told me your dad
had owned a hardware store.
And now it's a diner.

387
00:13:32,605 --> 00:13:34,106
And I told you
my grandfather also
owned a hardware store

388
00:13:34,315 --> 00:13:35,399
and I kept all of
his original tools?

389
00:13:35,608 --> 00:13:36,776
I remember the boat.

390
00:13:36,984 --> 00:13:38,527
And then you said
your dad had a crescent
wrench that he loved

391
00:13:38,736 --> 00:13:39,653
and you wish
you'd kept it.

392
00:13:39,862 --> 00:13:41,989
And my grandfather also
had one that he loved
and I did keep it.

393
00:13:42,198 --> 00:13:43,032
I'll go get it.

394
00:13:43,949 --> 00:13:46,076
I just forgot
the entire conversation
we just had.

395
00:13:46,368 --> 00:13:47,661
Come on, guys.

396
00:13:48,078 --> 00:13:49,789
<i>Hey, thanks for
inviting me over,
by the way.</i>

397
00:13:49,997 --> 00:13:52,082
<i>I don't get to see
a whole lot of
Rory these days.</i>

398
00:13:52,291 --> 00:13:54,627
<i>But at least I get to see
her for our anniversary,
which is great.</i>

399
00:13:54,835 --> 00:13:56,629
<i>Can you believe
it's two years?</i>

400
00:13:56,837 --> 00:13:58,088
<i>The cotton anniversary.</i>

401
00:13:58,714 --> 00:14:01,258
Okay, I got it.
Here we go.

402
00:14:01,467 --> 00:14:05,179
Here it is.
Look at the, uh,
date on the back.

403
00:14:05,387 --> 00:14:07,056
- Oh! And Lorelai...
- Huh?

404
00:14:08,098 --> 00:14:09,725
It's that virus protection
software I told you about.

405
00:14:09,934 --> 00:14:11,268
You want me to pop it
on your computer?

406
00:14:11,477 --> 00:14:13,229
- Where is it?
All right.
- Living room.

407
00:14:13,437 --> 00:14:15,272
It's got the Sadness
stickers from <i>Inside Out</i>
on it, right?

408
00:14:15,481 --> 00:14:17,274
- You remembered.
- Okay.

409
00:14:18,692 --> 00:14:20,236
It's nice that
he remembered.

410
00:14:20,444 --> 00:14:21,654
It's nice that
somebody remembered.

411
00:14:21,862 --> 00:14:23,656
This is a very
nice wrench.

412
00:14:27,076 --> 00:14:29,245
- What the hell
did you do here?
<i>- What?</i>

413
00:14:29,495 --> 00:14:31,288
Uh, the DVR is
completely full.

414
00:14:31,497 --> 00:14:33,874
I have no idea
what any of
these things are.

415
00:14:34,083 --> 00:14:36,377
<i>Restless Virgins,
Deadly Honeymoon...</i>

416
00:14:36,585 --> 00:14:37,670
<i>Lifetime Movie Channel classics.</i>

417
00:14:38,003 --> 00:14:40,089
<i>Killer Crush,
Mini's First Time.</i>

418
00:14:40,297 --> 00:14:42,424
A rebellious girl hooks up
with an escort agency

419
00:14:42,633 --> 00:14:45,636
where her
stepfather is a client.
Alec Baldwin. Pre-yoga.

420
00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:47,304
- So, keep?
<i>- Keep.</i>

421
00:14:47,513 --> 00:14:49,181
- Okay<i>. Accidental Obsession.
- Keep.</i>

422
00:14:49,348 --> 00:14:50,975
<i>- Murder in a College Town.
- Keep.</i>

423
00:14:51,183 --> 00:14:52,268
<i>- Crimes of the Mind.
- Keep!</i>

424
00:14:52,476 --> 00:14:54,228
<i>Fatal Acquittal,
Not With My Daughter,</i>

425
00:14:54,478 --> 00:14:56,355
<i>Baby Sellers,
Unfinished Betrayal,</i>

426
00:14:56,564 --> 00:14:58,732
<i>The Girl He Met Online,
The Boy He Met Online,</i>

427
00:14:58,941 --> 00:15:01,151
<i>Deadly Vows,
Lying Eyes,
Lies He Told,</i>

428
00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:02,570
<i>My Nanny's Secret.</i>

429
00:15:02,778 --> 00:15:04,655
Did the remote break?
Do we only get
one channel now?

430
00:15:04,864 --> 00:15:06,574
- Where's my pajamas?
- In the drawer.

431
00:15:06,782 --> 00:15:08,284
- Ugh. Felix...
- Oscar...

432
00:15:08,492 --> 00:15:09,869
I like my pajamas
on the chair,

433
00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:11,370
all crinkled up
and ready for bed,

434
00:15:11,579 --> 00:15:12,496
not suffocating
in a drawer.

435
00:15:12,663 --> 00:15:14,331
Your pajamas are
not puppies.

436
00:15:14,540 --> 00:15:16,417
<i>You should find
my bedtime rituals
endearing by now.</i>

437
00:15:16,625 --> 00:15:17,710
<i>What's taking you
so long?</i>

438
00:15:17,918 --> 00:15:20,337
You know,
I still can't get over
that piece Rory wrote.

439
00:15:20,546 --> 00:15:22,923
<i>Oh, really? 'Cause
you've been so stingy
with your praise.</i>

440
00:15:23,966 --> 00:15:25,175
Are those...

441
00:15:25,384 --> 00:15:27,219
- Puppies!
- Right.

442
00:15:30,180 --> 00:15:31,724
That is one great
kid you got.

443
00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:33,183
Eh, she's all right.

444
00:15:33,392 --> 00:15:34,310
She's all freaked out
she's gonna hear

445
00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:35,769
our rollicking
lovemaking tonight.

446
00:15:35,978 --> 00:15:38,314
What are
you doing?

447
00:15:38,522 --> 00:15:40,065
Organizing my magazines
by Kardashian.

448
00:15:40,274 --> 00:15:41,191
You're stalling.

449
00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:42,443
I'm not stalling,
I'm organizing.

450
00:15:42,651 --> 00:15:44,153
You're not going to
have your dream tonight.

451
00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:46,947
My dirty
bathroom dream?
Yes, I am.

452
00:15:47,156 --> 00:15:48,407
Just come to bed!

453
00:15:48,616 --> 00:15:50,451
Five nights in a row.
Five nights in a row!

454
00:15:50,659 --> 00:15:53,037
I'm looking for a bathroom
and then I find one

455
00:15:53,245 --> 00:15:55,289
and it's like
the <i>Eastern Promises</i>
steam room scene,

456
00:15:55,497 --> 00:15:57,166
only the stuff on
the walls ain't blood.

457
00:15:57,374 --> 00:15:58,626
Don't think about it.

458
00:15:58,834 --> 00:16:00,169
The bathrooms
are all giant.

459
00:16:00,377 --> 00:16:02,504
And there's stalls
and urinals,
urinals, urinals...

460
00:16:02,713 --> 00:16:03,464
It's a dream!

461
00:16:03,672 --> 00:16:05,549
Last night, it was
the bathroom at the
Radio City Music Hall.

462
00:16:05,758 --> 00:16:06,967
- All the Rockettes
were there.
- Okay.

463
00:16:07,176 --> 00:16:08,719
- They kept slipping.
- I got it.

464
00:16:08,928 --> 00:16:10,346
Let's just sleep
standing up like cows.

465
00:16:10,554 --> 00:16:11,430
Tell you what.
You come to bed,

466
00:16:11,639 --> 00:16:13,307
you can watch one of
these ridiculous movies.

467
00:16:13,515 --> 00:16:14,975
- All the way through?
- Yes.

468
00:16:15,184 --> 00:16:16,477
You won't make me
turn it off

469
00:16:16,685 --> 00:16:18,145
right when the suspicious
sister, co-worker,

470
00:16:18,354 --> 00:16:20,189
or gay best friend
decides to investigate

471
00:16:20,397 --> 00:16:22,024
the abandoned
cabin by the lake

472
00:16:22,232 --> 00:16:23,817
where they find all
the proof they'll need
to expose the killer

473
00:16:24,026 --> 00:16:25,194
and then they
get hit in the head
with a hammer?

474
00:16:25,402 --> 00:16:26,028
Nope.

475
00:16:26,236 --> 00:16:27,613
Rory will
think we're rollicking.

476
00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:29,114
Well, no one ever
said she was dumb.

477
00:16:33,327 --> 00:16:35,746
<i>The deal for $49 billion
or about $95 per...</i>

478
00:16:37,331 --> 00:16:38,749
Don't
touch the handle!

479
00:16:38,958 --> 00:16:40,751
<i>...boards
have approved the deal</i>

480
00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:42,544
<i>and now begin
the long regulatory
process that follows.</i>

481
00:16:42,753 --> 00:16:44,546
<i>All of this--</i>

482
00:16:53,472 --> 00:16:55,975
<i>...four, five, six,
seven, eight.</i>

483
00:16:56,183 --> 00:16:59,269
<i>Repeat from the top.
A five, six, seven, eight...</i>

484
00:16:59,478 --> 00:17:03,315
<i>Shuffle, a three,
a five, a seven and a flap.</i>

485
00:17:03,524 --> 00:17:06,485
<i>Flap, flap, ball change,
flap, flap, flap, again.</i>

486
00:17:06,694 --> 00:17:08,404
<i>Shuffle! A three!</i>

487
00:17:08,612 --> 00:17:09,613
Too loud?

488
00:17:09,905 --> 00:17:11,031
No. Just loud enough.

489
00:17:11,281 --> 00:17:12,324
<i>Ball change...</i>

490
00:17:12,533 --> 00:17:13,492
What you doing?

491
00:17:13,701 --> 00:17:14,827
Stress tap dancing.

492
00:17:15,035 --> 00:17:16,912
Helps get out my anxieties.
Keeps me calm.

493
00:17:17,121 --> 00:17:19,248
How long have you
been tapping your
troubles away?

494
00:17:19,456 --> 00:17:21,834
About a month.
I needed something
to shut my brain off.

495
00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:24,003
I tried meditation.
Tried jogging.

496
00:17:24,211 --> 00:17:26,839
Then I read about this.
Now, when I can't sleep,

497
00:17:27,047 --> 00:17:29,174
- I get up and tap!
- Cool.

498
00:17:29,383 --> 00:17:31,176
- You know you're terrible.
- Yeah, I know.

499
00:17:31,385 --> 00:17:32,594
<i>Six, seven and shuffle!</i>

500
00:17:32,803 --> 00:17:34,054
- Where are you going?
- Nowhere.

501
00:17:34,263 --> 00:17:35,431
Do not get
your phone.

502
00:17:35,639 --> 00:17:36,557
<i>I don't know
what you are
talking about?</i>

503
00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:37,391
Do not film this.

504
00:17:37,599 --> 00:17:38,559
<i>Uh, I'm checking
on Paul Anka.</i>

505
00:17:38,767 --> 00:17:39,852
<i>Dance numbers
terrify him.</i>

506
00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:41,520
I mean it.
This is my stress relief.

507
00:17:41,729 --> 00:17:43,147
Do not make
my stress relief
stressful!

508
00:17:43,355 --> 00:17:44,773
- Damn it.
Where is it?
- I hid it.

509
00:17:44,982 --> 00:17:46,567
You are awful.

510
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:48,235
You think
I don't know you?
I have your eyes.

511
00:17:48,444 --> 00:17:49,820
- Fine.
- You want some coffee?

512
00:17:50,029 --> 00:17:51,071
Yes, please.

513
00:17:51,321 --> 00:17:52,781
You sure
I didn't wake you up?

514
00:17:53,032 --> 00:17:54,950
Not unless you
were dressed like
a urinal cake.

515
00:17:55,159 --> 00:17:56,702
You hungry?

516
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:58,037
'Cause you said
"cake"?

517
00:17:58,328 --> 00:17:59,329
Yes.

518
00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:00,748
Kind of.

519
00:18:06,754 --> 00:18:08,297
It's so nice to
have you home.

520
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:09,298
I wish you
were sleeping.

521
00:18:09,506 --> 00:18:10,799
I wish you were sleeping.

522
00:18:11,008 --> 00:18:12,468
Well, I have a lot
on my mind.

523
00:18:12,676 --> 00:18:14,011
My piece for
the <i>Atlantic</i>
fell through.

524
00:18:14,219 --> 00:18:15,012
No! When?

525
00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:16,346
Today. That was
the call that I got.

526
00:18:16,638 --> 00:18:17,806
Why?

527
00:18:18,057 --> 00:18:20,142
They just bumped
it for other stuff.
It happens.

528
00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:21,268
Sorry.

529
00:18:21,894 --> 00:18:23,979
It's okay.
I have a lot of
irons in the fire.

530
00:18:24,188 --> 00:18:25,564
I'm still
getting a lot of
good responses

531
00:18:25,773 --> 00:18:27,399
from the <i>New
Yorker</i> piece so...

532
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,568
Did I tell you
that I attacked
Gail Collins?

533
00:18:29,902 --> 00:18:30,819
You did not.

534
00:18:31,028 --> 00:18:32,488
I was waiting in
the lobby of the
Times Building

535
00:18:32,696 --> 00:18:34,156
hoping to talk to
the metro editor.

536
00:18:34,364 --> 00:18:35,908
And suddenly,
Gail Collins walks in.

537
00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:38,327
And I had met her once
at the 92nd Street Y.

538
00:18:38,535 --> 00:18:39,661
And I just wasn't
expecting to see her,

539
00:18:39,953 --> 00:18:40,996
and I was a little
jacked up on coffee,

540
00:18:41,205 --> 00:18:43,207
and I just lunged
at her,

541
00:18:43,415 --> 00:18:45,626
which she interpreted
as somebody she didn't
know lunging at her.

542
00:18:45,834 --> 00:18:47,377
- So sensitive.
- I felt so stupid.

543
00:18:47,586 --> 00:18:48,962
She was freaking out.
She gave me her wallet.

544
00:18:49,171 --> 00:18:50,464
Did you keep it?

545
00:18:50,672 --> 00:18:51,423
No.

546
00:18:51,632 --> 00:18:53,801
But, I don't know,
she was really nice
about it.

547
00:18:54,009 --> 00:18:55,260
She, uh, realized
who I was,

548
00:18:55,469 --> 00:18:57,346
and then asked
the security guards
to get off me.

549
00:18:57,554 --> 00:19:00,891
Well, here's the upside.
You definitely
made an impression.

550
00:19:01,100 --> 00:19:03,519
It's okay.
I have a lot of
irons in the fire.

551
00:19:03,727 --> 00:19:04,978
I heard. You should
become a blacksmith.

552
00:19:05,187 --> 00:19:06,772
What about you?

553
00:19:06,980 --> 00:19:08,774
Mmm...
What about me?

554
00:19:09,358 --> 00:19:10,567
Are you having
the dreams again?

555
00:19:10,776 --> 00:19:14,279
I'm just stressed out
and kind of feeling
my mortality lately.

556
00:19:14,488 --> 00:19:15,364
What do you mean?

557
00:19:15,572 --> 00:19:17,241
The other day,
a guest left a brochure

558
00:19:17,449 --> 00:19:18,951
in their room after
they checked out.

559
00:19:19,159 --> 00:19:21,411
It was for <i>Anthem of the Seas.</i>
So I'm flipping through,

560
00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:24,373
looking at swimming pools
and pictures of the buffet.

561
00:19:24,581 --> 00:19:27,793
Everything's planned
and they have
Wi-Fi and <i>Rock of Ages</i>

562
00:19:28,001 --> 00:19:29,211
and you don't have
to bring money.

563
00:19:29,419 --> 00:19:30,796
And suddenly
I found myself thinking...

564
00:19:31,004 --> 00:19:32,673
- No.
- ...maybe it would
be nice

565
00:19:32,881 --> 00:19:34,007
to take a cruise!

566
00:19:34,216 --> 00:19:35,759
<i>- No!</i>
- And then I broke a hip.

567
00:19:35,968 --> 00:19:36,844
You are not
going on a cruise.

568
00:19:37,052 --> 00:19:37,719
I know.

569
00:19:37,886 --> 00:19:39,638
Is everything
okay with Luke?

570
00:19:39,847 --> 00:19:41,098
Yeah, everything's fine.

571
00:19:41,723 --> 00:19:43,350
I annoy him and
he builds cabinets.

572
00:19:43,559 --> 00:19:44,434
Or at least
that's what I think.

573
00:19:44,643 --> 00:19:45,894
He says we need
the storage.

574
00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:48,522
Do you think it's
because of Grandpa?

575
00:19:49,106 --> 00:19:50,649
My sudden need to cruise?

576
00:19:51,650 --> 00:19:52,401
Yeah.

577
00:19:52,609 --> 00:19:53,527
No.

578
00:19:53,735 --> 00:19:56,196
I don't know.
Maybe.

579
00:19:57,406 --> 00:19:58,490
I miss him.

580
00:20:03,704 --> 00:20:05,164
To absent friends.

581
00:20:05,831 --> 00:20:07,082
To absent friends.

582
00:20:09,168 --> 00:20:11,670
You know, some people might
say drinking coffee in
the middle of the night

583
00:20:11,879 --> 00:20:12,838
could hinder
your sleep.

584
00:20:13,255 --> 00:20:14,548
People are dumb.

585
00:20:19,386 --> 00:20:23,307
♪ <i>Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba
Ba, ba, ba, ba</i>

586
00:20:23,515 --> 00:20:27,269
<i>♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba
Ba, ba, ba, ba</i>

587
00:20:27,477 --> 00:20:30,981
<i>♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba
Ba, ba, ba, ba ♪</i>

588
00:20:33,901 --> 00:20:35,485
Caesar, let's go!
Where's my toast?

589
00:20:35,694 --> 00:20:36,862
- Toaster's down.
- What?

590
00:20:37,070 --> 00:20:38,155
Oh, wait, it's
just unplugged.

591
00:20:38,447 --> 00:20:39,615
Toast coming
right up.

592
00:20:40,449 --> 00:20:43,619
Over easy, scrambled
soft, whites with cheese.
More coffee?

593
00:20:43,827 --> 00:20:45,078
What's the Wi-Fi
password here?

594
00:20:45,287 --> 00:20:46,914
Dinerluke.
Capital "D,"
small "L."

595
00:20:47,122 --> 00:20:47,748
Pick up!

596
00:20:47,915 --> 00:20:51,293
Luke, I need to talk
to you about your septic
tank testimonial.

597
00:20:51,543 --> 00:20:53,921
I'm not giving you
a septic tank
testimonial, Taylor.

598
00:20:54,129 --> 00:20:55,839
If you're confused
by what I need,

599
00:20:56,048 --> 00:20:58,550
I brought some
sample testimonials
to guide you.

600
00:20:58,759 --> 00:21:01,136
I think you'll find
Mimsy Frupp's description

601
00:21:01,345 --> 00:21:03,388
of her granddaughter's
disastrous day

602
00:21:03,597 --> 00:21:06,391
jumping into fall leaves
especially edifying.

603
00:21:06,725 --> 00:21:10,312
She thought
the tyke was diving
into an autumnal paradise.

604
00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:12,689
Instead she found
herself submerged--

605
00:21:12,898 --> 00:21:14,483
Taylor, you know,
order something
or get out.

606
00:21:14,691 --> 00:21:15,776
Fine.

607
00:21:16,568 --> 00:21:18,779
New menu.
I'll need a minute.

608
00:21:18,987 --> 00:21:20,030
Excuse me. Password?

609
00:21:20,239 --> 00:21:21,490
DINERDANES321.
All caps.

610
00:21:22,532 --> 00:21:23,867
Hey, there she is!
Get in here!

611
00:21:24,076 --> 00:21:24,743
<i>What about me?</i>

612
00:21:24,952 --> 00:21:26,036
Ah, you get in
here, too.

613
00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:28,038
- Should I be nervous?
- As a rule, yes.

614
00:21:28,288 --> 00:21:30,624
Okay. Something
I want you to see.

615
00:21:31,250 --> 00:21:33,001
New menus.

616
00:21:33,252 --> 00:21:34,503
Very nice.

617
00:21:34,711 --> 00:21:35,754
Notice anything?

618
00:21:35,963 --> 00:21:36,797
Oh... Nope.

619
00:21:37,005 --> 00:21:37,881
Turn it over.

620
00:21:39,716 --> 00:21:41,927
That's my <i>New Yorker</i>
piece. Wow!

621
00:21:42,135 --> 00:21:43,011
Super-proud!

622
00:21:43,262 --> 00:21:44,554
For everyone to read.

623
00:21:44,763 --> 00:21:45,764
Now what can
I get you?

624
00:21:45,973 --> 00:21:46,932
Coffee, please.

625
00:21:47,140 --> 00:21:48,976
Oh, I have a list and
I need it all to go.

626
00:21:49,184 --> 00:21:50,560
You got it.

627
00:21:51,937 --> 00:21:54,648
- That's my piece.
- Wrapped in plastic.

628
00:21:54,856 --> 00:21:57,526
Well, you knew when
Luke moved in with me
he'd turn weird eventually.

629
00:21:58,026 --> 00:22:00,904
Thanks for your patronage!
Be sure to call
my mom and rate me!

630
00:22:01,113 --> 00:22:03,073
Five stars is
appreciated!

631
00:22:04,658 --> 00:22:06,618
First official fare!

632
00:22:06,910 --> 00:22:09,454
<i>That elderly woman
that I just successfully
drove here?</i>

633
00:22:09,663 --> 00:22:13,625
That is widow Joy Puddleston
from 88 Peach Tree Drive.

634
00:22:13,834 --> 00:22:15,961
And right now,
thanks to
my new business,

635
00:22:16,169 --> 00:22:19,423
Widow Puddleston
is only 10 minutes
late for chemo!

636
00:22:19,631 --> 00:22:20,799
Are you ordering?

637
00:22:21,008 --> 00:22:23,260
Fudgy banana milkshake.
I am flying, man!

638
00:22:23,552 --> 00:22:24,928
- This is gonna work.
- Terrific.

639
00:22:25,220 --> 00:22:26,847
This area over here
would be perfect.

640
00:22:27,055 --> 00:22:28,307
Perfect for what,
Kirk?

641
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,310
Have you heard about
my new business, Luke?
Ooo-ber?

642
00:22:31,518 --> 00:22:32,561
<i>Do not make that sound!</i>

643
00:22:32,769 --> 00:22:34,938
I need to find a place
where after people call
and order a car,

644
00:22:35,230 --> 00:22:36,231
they can come
to get picked up.

645
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:37,774
This corner would
work beautifully.

646
00:22:37,983 --> 00:22:39,359
That's not how
Uber works, Kirk.

647
00:22:39,568 --> 00:22:40,902
Well, this isn't Uber,
this is...

648
00:22:43,113 --> 00:22:44,823
Luke, you need to
control your woman.

649
00:22:45,157 --> 00:22:47,159
Oh!

650
00:22:47,367 --> 00:22:48,577
Those aren't even
your bagels!

651
00:22:48,785 --> 00:22:50,329
I'm buying them
new ones.

652
00:22:52,289 --> 00:22:55,167
- Oh, crap!
I forgot about Paul?
- You're kidding?

653
00:22:55,375 --> 00:22:56,877
- No.
- He was at the house
this whole time?

654
00:22:57,085 --> 00:22:58,462
Didn't you notice
his car out front?

655
00:22:58,670 --> 00:22:59,338
No, didn't you?

656
00:22:59,546 --> 00:23:01,131
There you are.

657
00:23:01,381 --> 00:23:03,508
Hi, Paul.
I'm so sorry,
I just--

658
00:23:03,717 --> 00:23:06,136
It was my fault because
I needed her to come look
at something with me.

659
00:23:06,345 --> 00:23:08,847
And I promised to leave
you a note and I didn't.
And it's--

660
00:23:09,056 --> 00:23:10,724
I was about to call you.
Sit. Are you hungry?

661
00:23:10,932 --> 00:23:12,309
Not really.

662
00:23:12,517 --> 00:23:13,310
Not really?

663
00:23:13,602 --> 00:23:14,519
I'm not
a breakfast person.

664
00:23:14,728 --> 00:23:15,979
As in, you already
had breakfast?

665
00:23:16,188 --> 00:23:17,731
- No.
- Did you know
about this?

666
00:23:17,939 --> 00:23:19,316
Uh, I'm gonna go
wash my hands.
Just order me a tea?

667
00:23:19,524 --> 00:23:20,525
- Tea? No.
- Yes.

668
00:23:20,734 --> 00:23:21,860
- Go on.
- Okay.

669
00:23:23,362 --> 00:23:25,197
You have got to cut
that poor boy loose.

670
00:23:25,405 --> 00:23:26,948
I know, I keep meaning
to and I just keep...

671
00:23:27,157 --> 00:23:28,867
Forgetting!
So, so sad!

672
00:23:29,076 --> 00:23:31,078
Your breakfast list,
coffee to go.

673
00:23:31,286 --> 00:23:32,704
Have a good flight.
Come back soon.

674
00:23:32,913 --> 00:23:33,872
And take a menu.

675
00:23:34,081 --> 00:23:35,499
Thanks, Luke.

676
00:23:35,957 --> 00:23:38,960
♪ <i>La, la, la, la, la, la, la</i>

677
00:23:39,169 --> 00:23:40,837
- Bye.
- Bye.

678
00:23:41,046 --> 00:23:42,923
<i>♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la</i>

679
00:23:43,131 --> 00:23:44,966
<i>♪ La, la, la, la</i>

680
00:23:45,258 --> 00:23:48,011
<i>♪ La, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la</i>

681
00:23:48,220 --> 00:23:49,721
<i>♪ La, la, la</i>

682
00:23:53,892 --> 00:23:56,561
Crap, crap,
crap! Ooh!

683
00:23:58,021 --> 00:23:59,523
- Hey, got the food.
- Ready to go?

684
00:23:59,731 --> 00:24:00,816
Absolutely.

685
00:24:01,024 --> 00:24:04,569
<i>♪ La, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪</i>

686
00:24:04,778 --> 00:24:06,196
<i>I just don't understand it.</i>

687
00:24:06,405 --> 00:24:07,656
Before we got married,

688
00:24:07,864 --> 00:24:10,033
Frederick was
more indifferent to
children than I am.

689
00:24:10,325 --> 00:24:11,701
- That's not possible.
- Oh, yes.

690
00:24:11,993 --> 00:24:13,203
We could be walking
by the well

691
00:24:13,453 --> 00:24:15,455
that Timmy fell down
and he'd throw a penny in.

692
00:24:15,664 --> 00:24:17,457
Maybe he kept his
feelings to himself.

693
00:24:17,666 --> 00:24:19,292
For five years? No.

694
00:24:19,501 --> 00:24:20,794
Something happened.

695
00:24:21,002 --> 00:24:23,922
Twenty minutes
after "I do,"
he lost his mind.

696
00:24:24,131 --> 00:24:26,133
Now all he talks about is,
"Guess who's pregnant?"

697
00:24:26,341 --> 00:24:28,009
Or "What school
district is it in?

698
00:24:28,218 --> 00:24:30,053
"You have to live
in a good school
district."

699
00:24:30,345 --> 00:24:33,014
And I say, "Why?
Isn't that what
boarding school is for?

700
00:24:33,223 --> 00:24:35,267
"So you don't have
to live in a good
school district?"

701
00:24:35,475 --> 00:24:37,477
I don't actually
think that's what
boarding school's for.

702
00:24:37,686 --> 00:24:39,187
Well, it's
very mystifying.

703
00:24:39,396 --> 00:24:41,273
He keeps shoving
children in my arms.

704
00:24:41,481 --> 00:24:43,191
"Hold this.
What do you feel?"

705
00:24:43,442 --> 00:24:46,528
"Well, now there's
spittle on my Brioni
suit so, rage?"

706
00:24:46,778 --> 00:24:48,447
Why does it smell
like onions in here?

707
00:24:48,738 --> 00:24:50,282
Oh, the new pop-up
crew in the kitchen.

708
00:24:50,490 --> 00:24:51,700
That's tonight?

709
00:24:51,992 --> 00:24:53,076
Yes, that's tonight.

710
00:24:53,243 --> 00:24:54,536
I hate this pop-up idea.

711
00:24:54,744 --> 00:24:56,413
Well, we have
an empty dining room
and an empty kitchen.

712
00:24:56,621 --> 00:24:57,831
What do you propose
we do with them?

713
00:24:58,039 --> 00:24:58,957
Put on a show?

714
00:24:59,166 --> 00:25:01,960
We live in a town
where every restaurant
closes at 4:45.

715
00:25:02,169 --> 00:25:03,253
People need to eat.

716
00:25:03,503 --> 00:25:04,754
What's this new
chef guy's name again?

717
00:25:04,963 --> 00:25:06,631
Oh, come on.

718
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:08,884
I can't remember.
It's like a million
syllables long.

719
00:25:09,092 --> 00:25:10,510
Roy Choi.

720
00:25:10,719 --> 00:25:12,679
- Oh, the food truck guy.
- He's not a food truck guy.

721
00:25:12,888 --> 00:25:14,139
Yes, he's a guy
with a food truck.

722
00:25:14,347 --> 00:25:16,266
A fleet of food trucks,
three restaurants

723
00:25:16,475 --> 00:25:18,101
and a massive
online following.

724
00:25:18,310 --> 00:25:20,103
Oh, so he tweets?
He's a tweeter?

725
00:25:20,395 --> 00:25:23,982
"Hey, kids.
Come grab some rad food
at the Dragonfly."

726
00:25:24,191 --> 00:25:25,484
Do you even know
how Twitter works?

727
00:25:25,692 --> 00:25:26,693
Oh, he's cool, right?

728
00:25:26,902 --> 00:25:28,320
Yes, he seems cool.

729
00:25:28,653 --> 00:25:30,655
I hate cool.
Makes me feel so uncool.

730
00:25:30,864 --> 00:25:33,742
I don't need some cool guy
running around tweeting,

731
00:25:33,950 --> 00:25:35,660
making me feel uncool
in my own inn.

732
00:25:35,869 --> 00:25:38,830
Why on earth
aren't you on Xanax?
It was invented for you.

733
00:25:39,039 --> 00:25:40,749
And that "Kogi" tattoo
on his arm?
What's that all about?

734
00:25:40,957 --> 00:25:42,292
Kogi is the name
of his business.

735
00:25:42,501 --> 00:25:44,753
So the tattoo,
while not as clever
as "Wino Forever,"

736
00:25:44,961 --> 00:25:46,505
is at least
thematically correct.

737
00:25:46,713 --> 00:25:48,131
We should hire
a regular chef.

738
00:25:48,340 --> 00:25:49,758
We should,
shouldn't we?

739
00:25:49,966 --> 00:25:51,801
- How long is
this pop-up thing?
- Two weeks.

740
00:25:52,093 --> 00:25:53,136
- Can it be less?
- No.

741
00:25:53,345 --> 00:25:54,137
I'd like it
to be less.

742
00:25:54,346 --> 00:25:55,764
I don't need a child.
I have you.

743
00:25:58,058 --> 00:26:00,352
<i>Great. He's gonna
set the whole place on fire.</i>

744
00:26:00,894 --> 00:26:02,562
- Oh, hey, Lorelai.
- Hey.

745
00:26:02,771 --> 00:26:03,772
This kitchen's awesome.

746
00:26:03,980 --> 00:26:05,023
Uh, Sookie set it
up perfectly.

747
00:26:05,357 --> 00:26:06,650
Yes, well,
Sookie's a genius.

748
00:26:06,900 --> 00:26:08,527
- What is all this?
- You like abalone?

749
00:26:08,818 --> 00:26:11,696
- Is that
a trick question?
- No. Abalone is delicious.

750
00:26:11,905 --> 00:26:15,158
I'm doing a green pea congee
with some fried shallots,
spring onions,

751
00:26:15,367 --> 00:26:18,286
cilantro,
chili oil and abalone.
Oh, I meant to ask.

752
00:26:18,537 --> 00:26:20,705
Can I screw with
the dining room a little?
Make it less granny?

753
00:26:20,914 --> 00:26:22,499
- Uh, no.
- Problem.
No problem.

754
00:26:22,707 --> 00:26:24,167
<i>De-granny the place.</i>

755
00:26:24,376 --> 00:26:27,212
Go nuts.
I hated my grandmother.
Horrible woman.

756
00:26:27,420 --> 00:26:30,423
But we are thrilled
that you are here.
And she's not.

757
00:26:30,632 --> 00:26:32,634
Okay. All right, come on,
you guys. Let's go.

758
00:26:32,842 --> 00:26:34,177
Thank you.

759
00:26:34,386 --> 00:26:37,764
Abalone!
Yay!

760
00:26:39,057 --> 00:26:40,183
Will you relax,
please?

761
00:26:40,433 --> 00:26:42,811
Between you and Frederick,
I'm going to have a stroke.

762
00:26:43,019 --> 00:26:44,604
- Where is it?
- What?

763
00:26:44,813 --> 00:26:46,356
The coffeemaker.
Where is
the coffeemaker?

764
00:26:46,606 --> 00:26:48,525
- Uh...
- It was right
here yesterday!

765
00:26:48,733 --> 00:26:49,985
It was right here! Roy!

766
00:26:50,235 --> 00:26:51,653
Uh, I...
Wait...

767
00:26:51,903 --> 00:26:56,116
Roy! Um, Roy?
Where's the coffee machine?

768
00:26:56,324 --> 00:26:58,034
Oh, yeah. I moved it.
I needed counter space.

769
00:26:58,243 --> 00:26:59,369
Eduardo can make
you a coffee.

770
00:26:59,578 --> 00:27:00,704
How? Is Eduardo magic?

771
00:27:00,912 --> 00:27:02,038
He makes
a stovetop version--

772
00:27:02,247 --> 00:27:03,248
- Eh, eh, eh.
- It really is--

773
00:27:03,456 --> 00:27:04,791
- Eh, eh, eh, eh.
- I can move it back.

774
00:27:04,958 --> 00:27:06,668
I am so sorry, but
I don't think this
is gonna work.

775
00:27:06,918 --> 00:27:07,961
- Michel!
- I'm right here.

776
00:27:08,169 --> 00:27:09,838
Oh, sorry.
Uh, Michel, call over

777
00:27:10,046 --> 00:27:11,881
to Momo's and see if
they can accommodate

778
00:27:12,173 --> 00:27:14,384
a crazy cool congee
extravaganza.

779
00:27:14,593 --> 00:27:16,511
Thank you.
It's been a pleasure.

780
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:18,346
Louis here is gonna
walk you over

781
00:27:18,597 --> 00:27:20,390
to Momo's Tires
and get you settled.

782
00:27:20,599 --> 00:27:21,516
Wait, it's
a tire store?

783
00:27:21,683 --> 00:27:23,560
Buh-bye. Thank you.

784
00:27:25,437 --> 00:27:26,313
What, Michel?

785
00:27:26,521 --> 00:27:28,732
At least you were nicer
than you were to
Anthony Bourdain.

786
00:27:28,940 --> 00:27:30,400
Bourdain parked
in Sookie's spot.

787
00:27:30,609 --> 00:27:33,361
Now once again,
we have an empty kitchen.

788
00:27:33,612 --> 00:27:34,613
We will find
a full-time chef.

789
00:27:34,821 --> 00:27:35,947
- No, we won't.
- Yes, we will.

790
00:27:36,156 --> 00:27:37,115
You think no one
can cook like her.

791
00:27:37,324 --> 00:27:38,575
- No one can.
- April Bloomfield?

792
00:27:38,783 --> 00:27:39,951
- Too much pork.
- Alice Waters.

793
00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:41,786
- A little flighty.
- David Chang?

794
00:27:42,120 --> 00:27:43,622
AI's does the same thing.

795
00:27:43,830 --> 00:27:46,249
AI's Pancake World does
not do the same thing
as David Chang.

796
00:27:46,458 --> 00:27:47,542
I can't help it.
It has to be right.

797
00:27:47,751 --> 00:27:48,960
You miss her?
Fine. I don't.

798
00:27:49,169 --> 00:27:50,962
- She abandoned us.
- Oh, she did not abandon us.

799
00:27:51,171 --> 00:27:53,006
A six-month sabbatical.
That's what she said.

800
00:27:53,214 --> 00:27:54,758
She was going to
clear her head,

801
00:27:54,966 --> 00:27:56,551
and come up
with new recipes
and then be back.

802
00:27:56,760 --> 00:27:58,386
Well, that was
a year ago.

803
00:27:58,637 --> 00:28:00,055
Well, what can I say?
She found her calling.

804
00:28:00,305 --> 00:28:02,432
- Really. What's
her calling?
- Michel.

805
00:28:02,641 --> 00:28:04,893
No, I'm just curious.
Describe what she's doing
up there, up in the woods.

806
00:28:05,101 --> 00:28:07,270
She's working
with Dan Barber
at Blue Hill Farm.

807
00:28:07,479 --> 00:28:08,229
Doing?

808
00:28:08,396 --> 00:28:11,149
Well, she
is helping him develop
food-growing techniques

809
00:28:11,358 --> 00:28:13,151
and cultivating
the evolution of
fruits and vegetables,

810
00:28:13,360 --> 00:28:16,279
which helps the people
who eat them and--

811
00:28:16,488 --> 00:28:19,157
I don't know.
They're saving the world.
It's on the website.

812
00:28:19,366 --> 00:28:21,743
No, she's squatting
in a cabin with
no phone service,

813
00:28:21,993 --> 00:28:24,037
trying to grow a pineapple
out of a coat rack!

814
00:28:24,245 --> 00:28:25,622
She's not saving the world.

815
00:28:25,830 --> 00:28:28,124
She just finally found
a way to never
shave her legs again.

816
00:28:28,333 --> 00:28:29,626
Ooh! Hi, Gypsy!

817
00:28:29,834 --> 00:28:31,461
<i>- I have good news.</i>
- Great! What?

818
00:28:31,711 --> 00:28:34,464
Oh, Lorelai.
Damn, I dialed
the wrong number.

819
00:28:34,673 --> 00:28:35,715
I'll call you back.

820
00:28:35,924 --> 00:28:37,133
No, wait! When can
I get my car?

821
00:28:37,342 --> 00:28:38,343
<i>I'm waiting for a part.</i>

822
00:28:38,551 --> 00:28:40,679
It's coming in
a DeLorean from 1983.

823
00:28:40,887 --> 00:28:42,347
I need it tonight.
I have
to go to Hartford.

824
00:28:42,555 --> 00:28:43,598
<i>I don't know
what to tell you.</i>

825
00:28:43,890 --> 00:28:46,643
Oh, wait, yes I do.
Buy a new car.

826
00:28:46,851 --> 00:28:48,311
- Thanks. Great.
<i>- I hate this one.</i>

827
00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:49,813
- It's very old.
<i>- I got it.</i>

828
00:28:50,021 --> 00:28:51,231
But it's fun to kick.

829
00:28:51,439 --> 00:28:52,524
<i>Bye, Gypsy.</i>

830
00:28:59,072 --> 00:29:00,448
Hi, Mrs. Gleason?

831
00:29:01,908 --> 00:29:04,035
Hey, Kirk?
It's freezing back here.

832
00:29:04,244 --> 00:29:06,621
Oh, that's probably because
I vented the floor.

833
00:29:06,830 --> 00:29:08,164
- Pardon?
- The floor.

834
00:29:08,373 --> 00:29:10,166
I drilled a few
holes in the floor.

835
00:29:11,292 --> 00:29:13,294
Was there an explanation
that came with that or...

836
00:29:13,503 --> 00:29:15,505
Two customers
passed out last week.

837
00:29:15,714 --> 00:29:18,341
They were old,
so it could've just been
old people passing out.

838
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:22,470
Or carbon monoxide.
I just thought
better safe than sorry.

839
00:29:22,679 --> 00:29:23,888
Would you like
some water?

840
00:29:24,097 --> 00:29:25,098
Yes. That would be nice.

841
00:29:26,808 --> 00:29:28,184
Here, could you...

842
00:29:28,393 --> 00:29:29,853
Oh, uh, okay.

843
00:29:30,061 --> 00:29:31,521
<i>And how about
some music?</i>

844
00:29:31,730 --> 00:29:33,481
The radio was stolen,
but I'm happy

845
00:29:33,732 --> 00:29:35,984
to sing any song
you request

846
00:29:36,192 --> 00:29:37,569
as long as it's
by the Carpenters.

847
00:29:37,777 --> 00:29:39,446
How about something
by the Carpenters?

848
00:29:39,654 --> 00:29:40,655
Good choice.

849
00:29:41,740 --> 00:29:45,577
<i>♪ Such a feeling's
coming over me</i>

850
00:29:45,785 --> 00:29:49,998
<i>♪ There is wonder
In most everything I see</i>

851
00:29:50,206 --> 00:29:52,417
<i>♪ Not a cloud in the sky</i>

852
00:29:52,625 --> 00:29:54,794
<i>♪ Now the sun is in my eye</i>

853
00:29:55,003 --> 00:30:01,342
<i>♪ And I won't be surprised
If it's a dream ♪</i>

854
00:30:01,551 --> 00:30:05,889
♪ <i>I'm on the top
of the world looking down
on creation</i>

855
00:30:06,097 --> 00:30:11,311
<i>♪ And the only explanation
I can find</i>

856
00:30:13,605 --> 00:30:16,691
<i>♪ Is the love that
I've found ever since
you've been around ♪</i>

857
00:30:16,900 --> 00:30:18,777
Uh,
well, thanks, Kirk.

858
00:30:19,068 --> 00:30:20,445
I'm not there yet.

859
00:30:23,072 --> 00:30:24,282
You know,
I think I'm okay.

860
00:30:24,491 --> 00:30:25,700
It's door-to-door
service.

861
00:30:25,909 --> 00:30:27,619
Well, I won't tell
if you don't.

862
00:30:27,827 --> 00:30:29,496
I still have to charge
the same price.

863
00:30:29,704 --> 00:30:30,872
That's fine, Kirk.

864
00:30:33,291 --> 00:30:34,501
<i>You have arrived!</i>

865
00:30:34,709 --> 00:30:35,710
Bye, Kirk.

866
00:30:41,341 --> 00:30:42,634
<i>Oh, hola! Hello.</i>

867
00:30:42,842 --> 00:30:45,637
Hi. Um, uh,
I'm Lorelai.

868
00:30:45,845 --> 00:30:46,805
Emily's, um...

869
00:30:49,224 --> 00:30:51,226
No, no, no.
I don't think
Rory's here yet.

870
00:30:52,936 --> 00:30:55,897
Um, my, uh, daughter,
that's... That's her.

871
00:30:56,105 --> 00:30:57,774
Ah!

872
00:30:57,982 --> 00:31:00,360
She's not and
I'm not gonna be
flying solo tonight,

873
00:31:00,568 --> 00:31:01,653
- so I'm gonna
wait outside.
- Oh!

874
00:31:01,861 --> 00:31:04,447
But don't say anything
to, uh, Mrs. Gilmore.

875
00:31:04,656 --> 00:31:06,282
- Oh.
- Okay? Shh. Shh.

876
00:31:06,491 --> 00:31:07,867
- Okay.
- Shh. Okay. Thank you.

877
00:31:08,076 --> 00:31:09,327
Oh...

878
00:31:11,538 --> 00:31:12,705
Oh, thank God!

879
00:31:14,207 --> 00:31:16,543
Hey, you promised you'd
be here right at 7:00.

880
00:31:16,751 --> 00:31:18,294
- It's 7:05.
- Apology accepted.

881
00:31:18,503 --> 00:31:19,754
Why are you standing
out here? It's freezing.

882
00:31:19,963 --> 00:31:21,214
'Cause we're a team.
We go in together.

883
00:31:21,422 --> 00:31:22,966
You think Dean Martin
would go in without
Jerry Lewis?

884
00:31:23,174 --> 00:31:24,759
No, but Jerry Lewis would
totally go in without Dean.

885
00:31:24,968 --> 00:31:25,885
Are you saying that
I'm Jerry Lewis?

886
00:31:26,094 --> 00:31:27,804
- I'm going to ring
the doorbell now.
- How come I'm Jerry Lewis?

887
00:31:28,012 --> 00:31:29,347
You do not need me to
answer that for you.

888
00:31:29,556 --> 00:31:31,099
Hmm. Hi, here's Rory.

889
00:31:31,307 --> 00:31:33,184
Ah!

890
00:31:33,393 --> 00:31:35,019
Right.

891
00:31:35,645 --> 00:31:39,315
Rory, there you are.
It is so good to see you.

892
00:31:39,524 --> 00:31:41,860
Hi, Grandma.
It's so good to see you.
How are you?

893
00:31:42,068 --> 00:31:43,695
Well, I am a Gilmore.

894
00:31:44,779 --> 00:31:47,532
My goodness, you look
absolutely radiant.

895
00:31:47,740 --> 00:31:50,243
Well, she is a Gilmore.
And 32, which helps.

896
00:31:50,451 --> 00:31:51,703
I think you must
be in love.

897
00:31:51,911 --> 00:31:53,204
Hi, Mom.

898
00:31:53,413 --> 00:31:54,747
Don't track
muddy water in here.

899
00:31:54,956 --> 00:31:55,999
I just had
the floors waxed.

900
00:31:56,207 --> 00:31:57,292
You and I had
a better rapport.

901
00:31:57,500 --> 00:31:59,836
Excuse me, Mrs. Gilmore.

902
00:32:00,044 --> 00:32:03,715
Oh, good, good. In here.
I need light bulbs.

903
00:32:03,965 --> 00:32:05,592
This, there.
You see...

904
00:32:05,884 --> 00:32:07,010
- There and there.
- Ah.

905
00:32:07,260 --> 00:32:09,637
- The bulbs...
The bulbs are out.
- Hmm.

906
00:32:09,846 --> 00:32:10,805
- No problem.
- Yeah?

907
00:32:11,014 --> 00:32:13,725
And now...
And in here...

908
00:32:13,975 --> 00:32:14,934
That sconce...

909
00:32:15,143 --> 00:32:18,605
<i>And then over
the picture, the light.
Over here, the picture...</i>

910
00:32:18,855 --> 00:32:21,733
The... The lights over
the picture? Yes?

911
00:32:21,941 --> 00:32:23,359
Did you get
a new handyman, Mom?

912
00:32:24,694 --> 00:32:25,904
Cyrano?

913
00:32:26,112 --> 00:32:27,530
Grandma, did you hire
a new handyman?

914
00:32:27,739 --> 00:32:28,865
Yes. That's Alejandro.

915
00:32:29,073 --> 00:32:32,160
He's Berta's
husband and he's amazing.
He can fix anything.

916
00:32:32,493 --> 00:32:34,454
I'm usually wary
about hiring husbands.

917
00:32:34,662 --> 00:32:36,664
I hired a maid
once whose husband
was a gardener.

918
00:32:36,873 --> 00:32:40,084
He got angry with her
one day and decapitated
one of my topiaries.

919
00:32:40,335 --> 00:32:41,961
Hmm. Was it
the one of Spiro Agnew?

920
00:32:45,673 --> 00:32:46,966
- Ask her, ask her.
- Uh, Grandma...

921
00:32:47,175 --> 00:32:49,260
<i>Just wondering...
Who are the kids?</i>

922
00:32:49,469 --> 00:32:51,888
Oh, they're Berta's
children, I think.

923
00:32:52,096 --> 00:32:53,097
You think?

924
00:32:53,306 --> 00:32:54,390
They appeared
when she appeared,

925
00:32:54,599 --> 00:32:55,600
so I just put two
and two together.

926
00:32:55,808 --> 00:32:58,102
Mom, you suddenly have
an entire family living
in your house

927
00:32:58,311 --> 00:32:59,729
and you're not sure
if they're actually
a family?

928
00:32:59,938 --> 00:33:01,397
So what, Lorelai?

929
00:33:01,606 --> 00:33:03,608
I have a house.
They needed
a place to live.

930
00:33:03,816 --> 00:33:05,276
They work for me.
Problem?

931
00:33:05,485 --> 00:33:07,320
No. Yes. All good.
You're right.

932
00:33:07,612 --> 00:33:09,614
Now. Let's go sit
and have martinis.

933
00:33:09,822 --> 00:33:11,783
And you can tell me
all about this wonderful
new boy.

934
00:33:11,991 --> 00:33:13,451
Oh, well,
he's not new.

935
00:33:13,660 --> 00:33:15,453
We've been going out
about two years.

936
00:33:15,703 --> 00:33:16,621
Really?
I must meet him.

937
00:33:16,829 --> 00:33:17,997
Oh, you did.

938
00:33:18,206 --> 00:33:19,749
Really? I'm sorry.
I'll meet him again.

939
00:33:19,958 --> 00:33:20,875
Won't matter.

940
00:33:21,084 --> 00:33:21,793
Come sit.

941
00:33:22,043 --> 00:33:23,503
What?

942
00:33:26,464 --> 00:33:27,548
Uh, Mom?

943
00:33:27,757 --> 00:33:28,633
Yes?

944
00:33:30,176 --> 00:33:31,970
- Um...
- Oh, yes.

945
00:33:32,178 --> 00:33:33,596
Isn't it wonderful?

946
00:33:35,974 --> 00:33:36,975
It's...

947
00:33:37,183 --> 00:33:39,268
It's... It's...

948
00:33:39,477 --> 00:33:40,645
It's...

949
00:33:41,312 --> 00:33:42,480
The whole wall!

950
00:33:42,772 --> 00:33:45,024
I had it painted
from one of my favorite
pictures of him.

951
00:33:45,233 --> 00:33:46,734
- Do you like it?
- Yes.

952
00:33:46,943 --> 00:33:47,735
Sure.

953
00:33:49,487 --> 00:33:53,950
It's so big.

954
00:33:54,617 --> 00:33:58,287
It's a Marco Toretti.
His specialty is
large canvases.

955
00:33:58,496 --> 00:34:00,581
Well, he did
himself proud.

956
00:34:01,165 --> 00:34:03,918
And, you wanted
it that big, right?

957
00:34:04,127 --> 00:34:04,961
Of course I did.

958
00:34:05,294 --> 00:34:07,005
'Cause it's a...
A real presence.

959
00:34:07,213 --> 00:34:09,048
As was your father.
Olive?

960
00:34:09,340 --> 00:34:11,092
And he came and
measured the space?

961
00:34:11,300 --> 00:34:12,760
- Who?
- Mario Andretti?

962
00:34:12,969 --> 00:34:14,762
Marco Toretti.
Yes, he did. Why?

963
00:34:14,971 --> 00:34:15,680
No reason.

964
00:34:15,888 --> 00:34:17,223
I wanted something
dramatic.

965
00:34:17,473 --> 00:34:18,516
And you got it.

966
00:34:18,766 --> 00:34:20,226
- I did.
- Okay.

967
00:34:21,894 --> 00:34:23,062
- Cheers.
- Cheers.

968
00:34:28,568 --> 00:34:29,944
Oh, come on, Mom.
Admit it.

969
00:34:30,153 --> 00:34:30,778
Admit what?

970
00:34:30,987 --> 00:34:32,238
You Spinal Tapped
the painting.

971
00:34:32,447 --> 00:34:33,865
<i>- What?
- You Spinal Tapped
the painting.</i>

972
00:34:34,073 --> 00:34:35,033
You gave them
the wrong dimensions,

973
00:34:35,241 --> 00:34:36,242
or they wrote down
the wrong dimensions,

974
00:34:36,451 --> 00:34:37,660
and now you're trying
to pretend that

975
00:34:37,869 --> 00:34:40,288
that massive portrait
is something
you actually intended.

976
00:34:40,496 --> 00:34:42,081
- It was. Yes.
<i>- It was?</i>

977
00:34:42,290 --> 00:34:45,251
You intended for Dad's
eyebrow and my forearm
to be exactly the same length?

978
00:34:45,460 --> 00:34:46,169
Yes.

979
00:34:46,377 --> 00:34:47,962
It's 18 feet tall!

980
00:34:48,171 --> 00:34:50,256
- It's not 18 feet tall.
<i>- It looks 18 feet tall.</i>

981
00:34:50,465 --> 00:34:51,674
Should I get
a tape measure?

982
00:34:51,883 --> 00:34:53,009
- No.
<i>- I can get
a tape measure.</i>

983
00:34:53,217 --> 00:34:54,135
Do not get
a tape measure.

984
00:34:54,343 --> 00:34:55,678
Alejandro has
a tape measure.

985
00:34:55,887 --> 00:34:58,931
I don't believe
you wanted a portrait
of Dad so massive,

986
00:34:59,182 --> 00:35:01,059
- it doesn't fit
on the wall!
- Well, I did.

987
00:35:01,267 --> 00:35:02,727
A portrait so big,

988
00:35:02,935 --> 00:35:04,771
Peter Jackson
could hang it
at the Argonath.

989
00:35:04,979 --> 00:35:05,897
Yes, he could.

990
00:35:06,147 --> 00:35:07,690
You don't know
what the Argonath is!

991
00:35:07,899 --> 00:35:09,484
Doesn't matter.
It's a nice
picture of Grandpa.

992
00:35:09,692 --> 00:35:11,694
Mom. Do it over.

993
00:35:11,903 --> 00:35:13,738
Get what you want.
You have the money.

994
00:35:13,946 --> 00:35:15,239
This is what I want.

995
00:35:15,448 --> 00:35:16,741
I swear it can't be.

996
00:35:16,949 --> 00:35:18,493
- Why not?
<i>- Because! Look at it.</i>

997
00:35:18,701 --> 00:35:21,913
It's nuts! "Wizard,
you shall not pass!"
Seriously!

998
00:35:22,121 --> 00:35:24,624
Fine! I made a mistake!
Are you happy?

999
00:35:24,832 --> 00:35:27,627
I gave them
the wrong dimensions
and they screwed it up.

1000
00:35:27,835 --> 00:35:29,420
I'm a screw-up!
I admit it!

1001
00:35:29,629 --> 00:35:31,672
Just please, please
don't let this be

1002
00:35:31,881 --> 00:35:34,175
the only thing
you remember to say
at my funeral!

1003
00:35:38,179 --> 00:35:39,639
So...

1004
00:35:41,516 --> 00:35:42,767
Yes?

1005
00:35:43,684 --> 00:35:46,854
Did I tell you what
happened at the funeral
after you left?

1006
00:35:47,063 --> 00:35:49,357
Why, no, you didn't.

1007
00:35:50,441 --> 00:35:52,110
Because something did.

1008
00:35:56,781 --> 00:35:59,117
♪ <i>And they all pretend
they're Orphans</i>

1009
00:35:59,408 --> 00:36:01,828
<i>♪ And their memory's
like a train</i>

1010
00:36:02,036 --> 00:36:05,498
<i>♪ You can see it getting
smaller as it pulls away</i>

1011
00:36:07,542 --> 00:36:10,086
<i>♪ And the things
you can't remember</i>

1012
00:36:10,294 --> 00:36:12,839
<i>♪ Tell the things
you can't forget</i>

1013
00:36:13,047 --> 00:36:16,634
<i>♪ That history puts a saint
in every dream</i>

1014
00:36:19,220 --> 00:36:22,140
<i>♪ So put a candle
in the window</i>

1015
00:36:22,348 --> 00:36:24,851
<i>♪ And a kiss upon his lips</i>

1016
00:36:25,059 --> 00:36:29,147
<i>♪ As the dish outside
the window fills with rain</i>

1017
00:36:31,399 --> 00:36:36,362
<i>♪ Just like a stranger with
the weeds in your heart</i>

1018
00:36:36,571 --> 00:36:40,324
<i>♪ And pay the fiddler off
till I come back again</i>

1019
00:36:40,533 --> 00:36:44,912
<i>♪ Oh, it's time, time, time</i>

1020
00:36:46,164 --> 00:36:50,293
<i>♪ And it's time, time, time</i>

1021
00:36:51,252 --> 00:36:55,173
<i>♪ And it's time, time, time</i>

1022
00:36:55,381 --> 00:36:57,758
<i>♪ That you love</i>

1023
00:36:57,967 --> 00:37:02,597
<i>♪ And it's time, time, time</i>

1024
00:37:02,889 --> 00:37:06,851
<i>♪ And it's time, time, time</i>

1025
00:37:08,269 --> 00:37:12,190
<i>♪ And it's time, time, time</i>

1026
00:37:13,774 --> 00:37:17,570
<i>♪ And it's time, time, time</i>

1027
00:37:17,862 --> 00:37:19,947
<i>♪ That you love</i>

1028
00:37:20,156 --> 00:37:25,745
<i>♪ And it's time, time, time ♪</i>

1029
00:37:25,995 --> 00:37:29,248
So nice of you to come.
You're in Florida now,
aren't you?

1030
00:37:29,540 --> 00:37:32,627
We are.
You should come visit us
when things calm down a bit.

1031
00:37:32,919 --> 00:37:34,795
I'll do that.
I promise.

1032
00:37:38,883 --> 00:37:40,676
- Beautiful service, Emily.
- Thank you.

1033
00:37:42,094 --> 00:37:43,221
I'm all right, Rory.

1034
00:37:43,429 --> 00:37:44,555
Okay.

1035
00:37:46,015 --> 00:37:46,891
I really am all right.

1036
00:37:47,099 --> 00:37:48,309
I know.

1037
00:37:50,353 --> 00:37:52,063
<i>Lorelai.</i>

1038
00:37:52,271 --> 00:37:55,399
Jason Stiles,
as I live and breathe.

1039
00:37:55,650 --> 00:37:58,319
You look like
the hottest Italian widow
I have ever seen.

1040
00:37:58,527 --> 00:38:00,613
It's nice
that you came.

1041
00:38:00,821 --> 00:38:03,491
Your father was a lion.
You know that.

1042
00:38:03,699 --> 00:38:05,826
I do.

1043
00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:07,954
I'm deeply sorry.

1044
00:38:08,162 --> 00:38:11,666
At least it was sudden.
Mom didn't have to
watch him fade away.

1045
00:38:12,667 --> 00:38:14,001
Have you seen my
mother by the way?

1046
00:38:14,418 --> 00:38:18,130
I've been successfully
keeping a living room's
worth of space between us.

1047
00:38:18,339 --> 00:38:19,757
She's in hostess mode.

1048
00:38:19,966 --> 00:38:21,425
The worst she'll do is send
you home with the shrimp.

1049
00:38:21,634 --> 00:38:24,136
- To which I'm allergic.
- Thus fulfilling
her devious plan.

1050
00:38:25,263 --> 00:38:26,389
You happy?

1051
00:38:26,597 --> 00:38:28,015
Right now or...

1052
00:38:30,101 --> 00:38:31,185
Are you happy?

1053
00:38:32,895 --> 00:38:33,771
Yes.

1054
00:38:35,064 --> 00:38:36,399
Umlauts.

1055
00:38:36,607 --> 00:38:37,400
Digger.

1056
00:38:46,742 --> 00:38:47,868
What you doin'?

1057
00:38:48,077 --> 00:38:50,204
Oh, there was
a screw loose in
the heating vent.

1058
00:38:50,413 --> 00:38:51,789
I didn't want it
to fall out.

1059
00:38:51,998 --> 00:38:53,958
Uh-huh.
Did you service
the boiler yet?

1060
00:38:54,166 --> 00:38:56,210
It was just
the one screw.
That's it.

1061
00:38:56,419 --> 00:38:57,878
Garbage disposal
working now?

1062
00:38:58,087 --> 00:39:00,631
I just saw it like that
and I had this with me so...

1063
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:02,049
- How about
the rain gutters?
- Well...

1064
00:39:02,258 --> 00:39:03,968
You just can't leave
them clogged like that.

1065
00:39:04,176 --> 00:39:07,013
The water gets
in the house.

1066
00:39:07,221 --> 00:39:09,724
I can't help it.
Funerals make me nervous.

1067
00:39:09,932 --> 00:39:10,808
Here.

1068
00:39:19,066 --> 00:39:20,359
Everything.
Sure.

1069
00:39:23,321 --> 00:39:24,363
Okay?
Sure.

1070
00:39:24,572 --> 00:39:26,240
Oh, <i>Senora</i> Gilmore,
don't worry.

1071
00:39:27,491 --> 00:39:28,826
Fine. Just take that
to the kitchen?

1072
00:39:29,035 --> 00:39:30,369
Ah!

1073
00:39:31,662 --> 00:39:32,747
What language is that?

1074
00:39:33,039 --> 00:39:33,956
I do not know.

1075
00:39:34,165 --> 00:39:35,207
I thought it was Spanish,

1076
00:39:35,416 --> 00:39:37,918
but then I had the gardener
try to tell her to come
in early one day

1077
00:39:38,127 --> 00:39:40,171
and he came back and told me
she wasn't speaking Spanish.

1078
00:39:40,379 --> 00:39:41,964
It took me a while
to understand
what he was saying

1079
00:39:42,173 --> 00:39:44,759
because I need the pool man
to translate for the gardener.

1080
00:39:44,967 --> 00:39:46,260
Hey, time to
get going, kid.

1081
00:39:46,469 --> 00:39:47,511
Oh, shoot!

1082
00:39:47,762 --> 00:39:49,388
I have to get
to the airport!

1083
00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:51,349
My goodness,
so dramatic.

1084
00:39:51,557 --> 00:39:53,768
Lorelai, please tell
your daughter
I'm going to be fine.

1085
00:39:53,976 --> 00:39:55,519
The two of you
can just run along.

1086
00:39:55,728 --> 00:39:57,521
Oh, no. I'm gonna
have Luke drive her.

1087
00:39:57,772 --> 00:39:58,773
You're staying?

1088
00:39:59,357 --> 00:40:00,358
Yeah.

1089
00:40:00,566 --> 00:40:01,692
All right.

1090
00:40:01,901 --> 00:40:03,361
Grandma...

1091
00:40:03,569 --> 00:40:05,112
You made him
very proud.

1092
00:40:05,321 --> 00:40:06,447
I will call you
when I get to London.

1093
00:40:08,115 --> 00:40:09,784
Emily, everything's
in good shape here.

1094
00:40:09,992 --> 00:40:11,285
- I'm sorry?
- Just send her your bill.

1095
00:40:11,494 --> 00:40:13,287
Right. So...

1096
00:40:14,705 --> 00:40:17,208
Thank you, Luke.
Drive safe now.

1097
00:40:17,416 --> 00:40:18,626
Okay, love you.

1098
00:40:18,834 --> 00:40:20,669
Ditto.
Bye, guys.

1099
00:40:23,964 --> 00:40:25,841
So... Scotch?

1100
00:40:26,759 --> 00:40:27,635
God, yes.

1101
00:40:29,470 --> 00:40:31,055
♪ <i>Made my bed</i>

1102
00:40:32,056 --> 00:40:34,642
<i>♪ Light my light</i>

1103
00:40:35,976 --> 00:40:42,400
<i>♪ I'll arrive late tonight</i>

1104
00:40:43,192 --> 00:40:50,282
<i>♪ Blackbird, bye bye</i>

1105
00:40:51,742 --> 00:40:53,953
<i>♪ Bye, bye</i>

1106
00:40:55,413 --> 00:40:57,123
♪ <i>Bye, bye</i>

1107
00:40:58,999 --> 00:41:00,793
<i>♪ Bye, bye ♪</i>

1108
00:41:03,754 --> 00:41:05,631
One of his favorites.

1109
00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:07,967
A classic for
a classic.

1110
00:41:08,175 --> 00:41:09,135
Hear, hear.

1111
00:41:12,471 --> 00:41:15,391
Well,
I know it's getting late,

1112
00:41:15,599 --> 00:41:18,811
and I know some of you have
a very long ride home.

1113
00:41:19,019 --> 00:41:23,274
I want to thank you
for your friendship
and for being here.

1114
00:41:23,482 --> 00:41:25,443
Richard loved
you all very much.

1115
00:41:26,485 --> 00:41:28,863
But before we all
go our separate ways,

1116
00:41:29,071 --> 00:41:32,450
I thought we could go around
and everyone could stand up

1117
00:41:32,658 --> 00:41:35,161
and tell a favorite
story about Richard.

1118
00:41:36,871 --> 00:41:37,913
What did she say?

1119
00:41:38,122 --> 00:41:40,458
I know there are hundreds
to choose from.

1120
00:41:40,666 --> 00:41:43,752
<i>But too bad, I'm going
to limit you to just one.</i>

1121
00:41:43,961 --> 00:41:45,045
<i>The best one.</i>

1122
00:41:45,463 --> 00:41:49,717
The one that most sums
up the Richard Gilmore
you know and love.

1123
00:41:49,925 --> 00:41:51,385
Let's start here.
Jack?

1124
00:41:53,888 --> 00:41:57,475
Well, Richard and I
go back, um, to Yale.

1125
00:41:57,683 --> 00:41:59,185
<i>And we both went there...</i>

1126
00:41:59,393 --> 00:42:00,811
Excuse me.
Will you switch
places with me?

1127
00:42:01,020 --> 00:42:02,313
What?
There's a draft.

1128
00:42:02,521 --> 00:42:03,397
We're outside.

1129
00:42:03,606 --> 00:42:05,274
Yeah, don't wanna go next.

1130
00:42:05,483 --> 00:42:07,485
<i>So, I decide to sneak a pair</i>

1131
00:42:07,693 --> 00:42:10,404
of black lacy women's
unmentionables

1132
00:42:10,613 --> 00:42:12,364
into his locker
for everyone to see.

1133
00:42:12,573 --> 00:42:15,034
<i>And so, one day
after polo practice,</i>

1134
00:42:15,242 --> 00:42:16,577
<i>I'm at the locker
and I'm trying</i>

1135
00:42:16,785 --> 00:42:18,746
<i>to pick the lock
so that I can leave</i>

1136
00:42:18,954 --> 00:42:21,081
<i>the unmentionables there,
and suddenly,</i>

1137
00:42:21,415 --> 00:42:25,294
<i>I look up and I see him
standing there across
the way at my locker</i>

1138
00:42:25,503 --> 00:42:29,006
<i>also holding a pair
of black lacy knickers.</i>

1139
00:42:31,133 --> 00:42:32,718
<i>And he sees me and
we look at each other</i>

1140
00:42:32,968 --> 00:42:35,262
<i>holding these
women's underpants.</i>

1141
00:42:35,471 --> 00:42:37,139
So finally,
Richard says,

1142
00:42:37,348 --> 00:42:41,393
"Well, we can't
possibly both be
in black."

1143
00:42:45,731 --> 00:42:46,649
Wonderful.

1144
00:42:46,857 --> 00:42:48,400
Franklin?

1145
00:42:50,694 --> 00:42:53,405
He cheated at cards.

1146
00:42:55,699 --> 00:42:57,159
<i>Only with you, Franklin.</i>

1147
00:42:57,368 --> 00:43:00,538
One day, I'd just got myself
a brand new Jaguar.

1148
00:43:00,746 --> 00:43:03,916
<i>Richard said,
"Let's play for pinks."</i>

1149
00:43:04,124 --> 00:43:05,459
So I say,
"Now, look here, Gilmore.

1150
00:43:05,668 --> 00:43:08,087
"You keep your
hands off my new car."

1151
00:43:09,255 --> 00:43:11,632
<i>And he smiles and says,
"Make me."</i>

1152
00:43:13,217 --> 00:43:14,385
And next we have--

1153
00:43:14,635 --> 00:43:16,512
Oh, looks like
Martin's asleep.

1154
00:43:16,720 --> 00:43:17,596
<i>Lorelai?</i>

1155
00:43:19,223 --> 00:43:20,307
What?

1156
00:43:20,516 --> 00:43:21,308
You're up.

1157
00:43:21,600 --> 00:43:22,810
No. No, no.

1158
00:43:23,143 --> 00:43:24,603
Let's...

1159
00:43:24,895 --> 00:43:27,398
We can wake
Martin up, huh?

1160
00:43:27,648 --> 00:43:30,943
Hey, Marty. Marty.
Babe Paley's in the corner.

1161
00:43:31,151 --> 00:43:32,319
<i>- Lorelai.</i>
- Hmm?

1162
00:43:32,903 --> 00:43:33,988
Just go.

1163
00:43:35,155 --> 00:43:38,325
Uh... Uh...

1164
00:43:38,534 --> 00:43:41,662
The best story...
Best story.

1165
00:43:41,870 --> 00:43:42,871
There's so many great...

1166
00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:45,040
No... No one else
wants to go?

1167
00:43:45,249 --> 00:43:47,793
Nope? They don't
because it's my turn.

1168
00:43:48,043 --> 00:43:49,628
<i>So, um, okay...</i>

1169
00:43:49,920 --> 00:43:53,674
I'm 10, and
I ask Dad if...

1170
00:43:53,882 --> 00:43:57,803
To play hide and seek,
and I went and hid
in his steamer trunk,

1171
00:43:58,053 --> 00:44:00,139
and he left and
went to Holland.

1172
00:44:02,182 --> 00:44:04,101
I'm sorry.
No, it was Belgium.

1173
00:44:04,310 --> 00:44:07,187
<i>Or... Oh, uh, I'm 15,</i>

1174
00:44:07,396 --> 00:44:11,942
and we were having
our, um, Gilmore
Fourth of July party

1175
00:44:12,151 --> 00:44:14,445
and Dad was dressed
as Paul Revere.

1176
00:44:14,695 --> 00:44:18,741
And I guess I was supposed
to be, um, greeting people

1177
00:44:18,949 --> 00:44:20,743
or playing the flute
with a peg leg,

1178
00:44:20,951 --> 00:44:23,954
<i>so he came looking
for me and he burst
into the pool house</i>

1179
00:44:24,163 --> 00:44:27,791
where I was on the couch
with Teddy Wiedemier III,

1180
00:44:28,042 --> 00:44:31,337
and we had just finished,
uh...

1181
00:44:31,629 --> 00:44:34,340
"The British are coming!
The British are..." Anyhow,
you get it.

1182
00:44:34,590 --> 00:44:36,342
<i>So Dad's livid and
he's running around
the party yelling,</i>

1183
00:44:36,634 --> 00:44:38,218
"Emily, our daughter's
losing her virginity

1184
00:44:38,427 --> 00:44:40,387
"five feet away
from the president
of J.P. Morgan,"

1185
00:44:40,596 --> 00:44:42,139
which was embarrassing
and not true,

1186
00:44:42,348 --> 00:44:44,350
because that ship had
sailed a long time ago,

1187
00:44:44,558 --> 00:44:46,977
like <i>Nina, Pinta,
Santa Maria</i> time ago,

1188
00:44:47,186 --> 00:44:48,562
if you know what I mean.

1189
00:44:49,521 --> 00:44:51,106
So...

1190
00:44:52,858 --> 00:44:56,570
Oh, I'm sorry,
it was not Belgium.
It was Croatia.

1191
00:45:10,751 --> 00:45:12,503
It was wonderful
seeing you again.

1192
00:45:12,753 --> 00:45:15,089
We should get together
next month maybe. Can we?

1193
00:45:15,297 --> 00:45:16,382
<i>I'd love to.</i>

1194
00:45:16,632 --> 00:45:18,759
<i>All right now,
you all drive carefully.</i>

1195
00:45:18,967 --> 00:45:19,927
<i>Thank you so much.</i>

1196
00:45:20,886 --> 00:45:21,887
<i>Good night.</i>

1197
00:45:22,096 --> 00:45:23,055
<i>Good night.</i>

1198
00:45:38,320 --> 00:45:39,321
I'm sorry.

1199
00:45:46,704 --> 00:45:47,746
You took me
by surprise.

1200
00:45:47,955 --> 00:45:49,123
Not another word.

1201
00:45:52,459 --> 00:45:54,086
It was late and
there was scotch.

1202
00:45:54,294 --> 00:45:55,921
Lorelai, stop talking.

1203
00:46:00,801 --> 00:46:01,635
I didn't mean to--

1204
00:46:03,429 --> 00:46:04,346
Don't follow.

1205
00:46:10,477 --> 00:46:11,395
Mom...

1206
00:46:13,522 --> 00:46:14,523
Mom...

1207
00:46:16,525 --> 00:46:17,735
Please, come back.

1208
00:46:18,110 --> 00:46:21,238
I didn't do it on purpose.
I had a brain freeze.
I panicked.

1209
00:46:21,989 --> 00:46:22,781
Mom.

1210
00:46:22,990 --> 00:46:24,283
<i>You two start
with the silver.</i>

1211
00:46:24,491 --> 00:46:26,994
I didn't know there'd
be a test.

1212
00:46:27,619 --> 00:46:28,328
A test?

1213
00:46:28,537 --> 00:46:29,997
- Yes.
- You didn't know
there'd be a test?

1214
00:46:30,205 --> 00:46:31,123
Is that what
you just said to me?

1215
00:46:31,331 --> 00:46:32,791
I also said I'm sorry.

1216
00:46:33,000 --> 00:46:34,001
- Did you?
- Yes.

1217
00:46:34,209 --> 00:46:35,169
<i>- Did you?</i>
- Yes.

1218
00:46:35,377 --> 00:46:36,044
Did you really?

1219
00:46:36,211 --> 00:46:37,713
Okay. You're making
me doubt it now--

1220
00:46:37,921 --> 00:46:39,214
<i>I asked you
for a story.</i>

1221
00:46:39,423 --> 00:46:42,468
"Oh, there was a time
when Dad bought me a doll.
I loved this doll."

1222
00:46:42,676 --> 00:46:45,929
Something like that.
Get out! Now!

1223
00:46:46,847 --> 00:46:49,057
"Oh, I remember when
he took me to the park."

1224
00:46:49,266 --> 00:46:50,392
He didn't take me
to a park.

1225
00:46:50,601 --> 00:46:51,977
- The zoo.
- That either.

1226
00:46:52,186 --> 00:46:53,729
The store!
The club! Kathmandu!

1227
00:46:53,937 --> 00:46:55,606
I don't give a damn
where he took you.

1228
00:46:55,814 --> 00:46:58,776
All I wanted was
a fond anecdote
from his only daughter

1229
00:46:58,984 --> 00:47:00,944
and what I got was
a rambling diatribe

1230
00:47:01,153 --> 00:47:03,197
on being abandoned
in a steamer trunk.

1231
00:47:03,489 --> 00:47:05,699
- I didn't...
- You have nothing
but contempt for this family.

1232
00:47:05,908 --> 00:47:06,742
That is not true.

1233
00:47:06,950 --> 00:47:09,286
What did we ever do
to you that filled you
with such contempt?

1234
00:47:09,495 --> 00:47:12,372
Love you? Support you?
Love Rory? Support Rory?

1235
00:47:12,581 --> 00:47:14,166
I'm not filled
with contempt.

1236
00:47:14,374 --> 00:47:16,877
All my other
friends have children
who worship them,

1237
00:47:17,085 --> 00:47:18,587
who call them every day,

1238
00:47:18,796 --> 00:47:20,881
who take pride
in the family name
and traditions.

1239
00:47:21,089 --> 00:47:22,049
I have pride.

1240
00:47:22,257 --> 00:47:24,676
Your father was
a great man.

1241
00:47:24,927 --> 00:47:26,136
A pillar of
the community.

1242
00:47:26,345 --> 00:47:27,471
<i>A man amongst men.</i>

1243
00:47:27,679 --> 00:47:28,680
I know.

1244
00:47:28,889 --> 00:47:31,141
And you dishonor him today
like this in his own house.

1245
00:47:31,350 --> 00:47:32,976
I didn't mean
to dishonor him.

1246
00:47:33,185 --> 00:47:35,145
Well, what did you
mean to do, Lorelai?
Break my heart in public?

1247
00:47:35,354 --> 00:47:36,897
No fun doing it
in private anymore?

1248
00:47:37,105 --> 00:47:37,815
<i>Mom.</i>

1249
00:47:38,023 --> 00:47:40,651
I know that you are
in massive pain.

1250
00:47:40,859 --> 00:47:42,444
Believe it or not,
I'm in pain, too.

1251
00:47:42,653 --> 00:47:44,321
<i>I'm tired and my
head is spinning,</i>

1252
00:47:44,571 --> 00:47:45,906
and I haven't
eaten in two days.

1253
00:47:46,114 --> 00:47:47,074
You? Not eaten? Please.

1254
00:47:47,282 --> 00:47:48,367
Yes, me!

1255
00:47:48,575 --> 00:47:50,869
I'm surprised you didn't
have a pizza delivered
during <i>Ave Maria.</i>

1256
00:47:51,078 --> 00:47:52,663
Well, I haven't eaten
and I drank

1257
00:47:52,871 --> 00:47:54,373
my weight in
single malt scotch.

1258
00:47:54,581 --> 00:47:56,416
I screwed up.
I made a mistake.

1259
00:47:56,750 --> 00:47:58,627
That was not a mistake.
That was premeditated.

1260
00:47:58,836 --> 00:48:01,380
How could it have been
premeditated if I didn't
know it was coming?

1261
00:48:01,630 --> 00:48:05,175
You never do anything unless
it's exactly what you want to
do. You never have.

1262
00:48:05,384 --> 00:48:07,970
You blow through life
like a natural disaster

1263
00:48:08,220 --> 00:48:10,347
knocking down everything
and everyone in your path.

1264
00:48:10,556 --> 00:48:12,432
I wonder if Luke knew
what he was getting into
with you?

1265
00:48:12,641 --> 00:48:13,267
Don't.

1266
00:48:13,475 --> 00:48:15,102
Did you ever ask
him what he wanted?

1267
00:48:15,310 --> 00:48:17,521
Where he wanted to live?
If he wanted children?

1268
00:48:17,729 --> 00:48:19,565
I'm sure none of that
mattered to Lorelai Gilmore.

1269
00:48:19,773 --> 00:48:22,568
Nothing ever matters to her
except what she wants,
what she feels.

1270
00:48:22,776 --> 00:48:25,279
<i>And God help you
if she thinks
you've wronged her.</i>

1271
00:48:25,487 --> 00:48:29,241
She will hold onto that grudge
forever just waiting for
the moment to get back at you.

1272
00:48:29,449 --> 00:48:32,286
I made a mistake!
A goddamn mistake!

1273
00:48:32,494 --> 00:48:34,288
You've never let me
make a mistake ever.

1274
00:48:34,496 --> 00:48:37,457
Not once in my life,
which is how we always
find ourselves here.

1275
00:48:37,666 --> 00:48:38,292
Where?

1276
00:48:38,500 --> 00:48:39,793
Standing in
the middle of this room

1277
00:48:40,002 --> 00:48:41,253
yelling at each
other like idiots!

1278
00:48:41,461 --> 00:48:43,422
How dare
you call me an idiot!

1279
00:48:43,630 --> 00:48:44,798
I just lost my husband!

1280
00:48:45,132 --> 00:48:46,842
I just
lost my father!

1281
00:48:47,050 --> 00:48:48,427
And you couldn't care less!

1282
00:48:48,635 --> 00:48:51,054
That's horrible.

1283
00:48:52,764 --> 00:48:53,974
You're horrible.

1284
00:48:54,182 --> 00:48:55,142
Get out!

1285
00:48:55,893 --> 00:48:58,312
First the help,
then me.
Seems about right.

1286
00:48:58,604 --> 00:48:59,563
Go home!

1287
00:48:59,897 --> 00:49:02,733
Go back to your beloved town
with its carnies and misfits,

1288
00:49:02,941 --> 00:49:04,568
and tell them how
your intolerable mother

1289
00:49:04,776 --> 00:49:06,570
yelled at you at
your father's funeral.

1290
00:49:06,862 --> 00:49:09,406
And they can all
console you and tell
you what a witch I am

1291
00:49:09,615 --> 00:49:10,866
and how perfect you are!

1292
00:49:12,910 --> 00:49:15,621
Full freakin' circle.

1293
00:49:20,834 --> 00:49:23,045
You couldn't have just
said he was well-read?

1294
00:49:23,587 --> 00:49:24,463
I know.

1295
00:49:24,671 --> 00:49:26,632
"My father. Boy,
did he love books."

1296
00:49:26,924 --> 00:49:27,966
I know, I know.

1297
00:49:28,216 --> 00:49:30,552
"And stamps. Whoo,
that stamp collection."

1298
00:49:30,761 --> 00:49:32,638
I was under
a lot of pressure.
You weren't there.

1299
00:49:32,846 --> 00:49:34,848
And how did you neglect
to tell me this?

1300
00:49:35,182 --> 00:49:37,601
- Oh, I didn't think
she was mad anymore.
- You didn't?

1301
00:49:37,809 --> 00:49:40,395
Well, I assumed she was,
because she hadn't answered

1302
00:49:40,604 --> 00:49:43,315
any of my calls or e-mails
for the last four months,

1303
00:49:43,607 --> 00:49:45,359
but I thought maybe
she'd hide it
in front of you.

1304
00:49:45,567 --> 00:49:47,110
Because
that's ever happened.

1305
00:49:50,489 --> 00:49:53,742
What could possibly
elicit that kind of
smile in this house?

1306
00:49:53,951 --> 00:49:55,869
It smells meaty.

1307
00:49:56,078 --> 00:49:57,621
Yes, but what
kind of meat?

1308
00:49:57,829 --> 00:49:59,998
And there's cheese,
and layers of...

1309
00:50:00,832 --> 00:50:02,459
- It's crunchy.
- Huh.

1310
00:50:02,668 --> 00:50:04,169
No, wait,
it's smooshy.

1311
00:50:04,378 --> 00:50:05,629
It's crunchy
and smooshy.

1312
00:50:05,837 --> 00:50:06,964
<i>What's crunchy
and smooshy?</i>

1313
00:50:07,172 --> 00:50:09,341
Peanut butter?
Or badly mixed cement?

1314
00:50:09,549 --> 00:50:12,803
So we've got meat,
cheese, peanut butter
or badly mixed cement.

1315
00:50:13,053 --> 00:50:14,471
Oh, for God's sake,
just eat it.

1316
00:50:14,721 --> 00:50:16,890
I'll tell you what,
I'll dive in first.

1317
00:50:17,099 --> 00:50:20,018
Mom always made me
taste her food
before she'd eat a bite.

1318
00:50:22,562 --> 00:50:26,066
Mmm. Delicious.
And it could be
peanut butter.

1319
00:50:26,274 --> 00:50:27,567
- Oh, yeah.
- Cool.

1320
00:50:27,776 --> 00:50:29,111
I really appreciate your
inviting me to dinner.

1321
00:50:29,319 --> 00:50:30,904
It was pretty
harrowing out there.

1322
00:50:31,697 --> 00:50:32,614
Who is this?

1323
00:50:32,823 --> 00:50:34,366
Kirk, your car broke down
at the end of the driveway.

1324
00:50:34,574 --> 00:50:36,952
It's lucky for me
I'm a very loud crier.

1325
00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:38,245
If your maid hadn't
heard my sobs,

1326
00:50:38,453 --> 00:50:39,997
I don't even want
to think what
would've happened.

1327
00:50:40,205 --> 00:50:41,665
You probably would've
run out of Kleenex.

1328
00:50:41,957 --> 00:50:43,500
It's nice we can
joke about it now.

1329
00:50:44,334 --> 00:50:46,044
Thanks for letting me stash
some boxes here, Grandma.

1330
00:50:46,253 --> 00:50:47,379
Where are you
going to live?

1331
00:50:47,587 --> 00:50:49,297
I'll get my own place
again, eventually.

1332
00:50:49,506 --> 00:50:51,717
Yeah, but for now
she's Jack Kerouac.
She's <i>On the Road</i>- ing it.

1333
00:50:52,009 --> 00:50:52,968
Pass the peyote.

1334
00:50:53,552 --> 00:50:54,803
But after you've
passed the peyote,

1335
00:50:55,053 --> 00:50:56,930
what bathroom will
you use to throw up in?

1336
00:50:57,139 --> 00:50:58,765
Well, I have
many options.

1337
00:50:58,974 --> 00:51:00,475
Paris lets me stay
at her place
when I'm in New York.

1338
00:51:00,684 --> 00:51:02,102
Or I can stay with Mom,
or Lane or you.

1339
00:51:02,310 --> 00:51:03,103
So you're homeless.

1340
00:51:03,311 --> 00:51:04,938
I am not homeless.

1341
00:51:05,147 --> 00:51:06,314
But you don't
live anyplace.

1342
00:51:06,523 --> 00:51:07,441
Just for now.

1343
00:51:07,649 --> 00:51:09,735
You're okay with
this vagabond existence
she's leading?

1344
00:51:09,985 --> 00:51:11,361
Like... Like a groupie?

1345
00:51:11,570 --> 00:51:12,446
I wish
she was a groupie.

1346
00:51:12,654 --> 00:51:13,822
I'd get better
tickets to stuff.

1347
00:51:14,031 --> 00:51:14,906
Luke! Buddy!

1348
00:51:15,115 --> 00:51:17,034
Hey, everybody. Emily.

1349
00:51:17,784 --> 00:51:18,994
- Careful!
- Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.

1350
00:51:19,202 --> 00:51:20,662
- No, I'll do that.
- Oh, sure.

1351
00:51:20,871 --> 00:51:22,039
Uh, thanks
for coming, hon.

1352
00:51:22,247 --> 00:51:25,292
Yes. Saved us all
a very expensive
cab ride.

1353
00:51:25,500 --> 00:51:27,627
Are you all leaving now?
We all just sat down to
dinner.

1354
00:51:27,836 --> 00:51:31,006
Oh, no, please.
Just eat. Um, no rush.
I can just, uh...

1355
00:51:31,840 --> 00:51:33,717
Buh-buh-buh!
Oh...

1356
00:51:36,094 --> 00:51:37,888
This really
is delicious.

1357
00:51:38,930 --> 00:51:41,600
Oh, thank you.

1358
00:51:41,850 --> 00:51:42,809
You don't like it?

1359
00:51:43,018 --> 00:51:46,021
- What? Oh, uh...
- Okay.

1360
00:51:47,189 --> 00:51:48,356
Very good.

1361
00:51:48,565 --> 00:51:50,859
Isn't it?
I could eat here
every night.

1362
00:51:52,319 --> 00:51:53,737
- Luke?
- Hmm, yes?

1363
00:51:53,945 --> 00:51:56,031
What do you think about
Rory's living situation?

1364
00:51:56,239 --> 00:51:57,699
- Um...
- Her traipsing around

1365
00:51:57,908 --> 00:52:00,368
from one couch to another
like she's Llewyn Davis.

1366
00:52:00,577 --> 00:52:01,411
Oh, it's fine.

1367
00:52:02,412 --> 00:52:07,209
Well, I mean, you know,
she's grown, and she's...

1368
00:52:07,417 --> 00:52:09,336
Uh, did you read
her <i>New Yorker</i> piece

1369
00:52:09,544 --> 00:52:11,088
that she wrote?
I put it on the menu.

1370
00:52:11,296 --> 00:52:14,257
Why is everyone
treating this like it's
a normal rite of passage?

1371
00:52:14,466 --> 00:52:17,511
Rory is a 32-year-old
college-educated woman

1372
00:52:17,719 --> 00:52:19,638
with no permanent address.
That's not normal.

1373
00:52:19,846 --> 00:52:22,099
Um, can I
be excused?

1374
00:52:22,307 --> 00:52:24,768
They're playing soccer
out there and they seem
to be short a man.

1375
00:52:24,976 --> 00:52:26,144
Go.

1376
00:52:28,855 --> 00:52:30,857
Hi, I'm Kirk!
Over here!

1377
00:52:31,650 --> 00:52:33,151
Explain to me again
who that person is?

1378
00:52:33,401 --> 00:52:34,820
Oh, that I could.

1379
00:52:35,070 --> 00:52:36,321
Grandma, I really don't
want you to worry about me.

1380
00:52:36,530 --> 00:52:37,864
I know exactly
what I'm doing.

1381
00:52:38,073 --> 00:52:39,658
I'm busier than
I've ever been.

1382
00:52:39,866 --> 00:52:41,576
I'm traveling,
I'm pursuing a goal.

1383
00:52:41,785 --> 00:52:44,121
And I don't have to store
my stuff here if it's going
to make you worry.

1384
00:52:44,329 --> 00:52:47,124
Of course, you can leave
your things here.
That's not what I meant.

1385
00:52:47,999 --> 00:52:49,126
There's a chair now.

1386
00:52:49,334 --> 00:52:50,418
Oh, sure.

1387
00:52:54,840 --> 00:52:58,009
Goal!

1388
00:53:03,390 --> 00:53:04,683
Call me from London.

1389
00:53:05,725 --> 00:53:06,893
- Luke.
- Yes?

1390
00:53:07,185 --> 00:53:08,353
That was just my way
of saying goodbye.

1391
00:53:08,603 --> 00:53:09,855
Oh, goodbye.

1392
00:53:10,063 --> 00:53:10,981
Good night, Mom.

1393
00:53:11,189 --> 00:53:12,482
Kirk, we're leaving!

1394
00:53:12,691 --> 00:53:14,025
- Talk tomorrow.
- Yep.

1395
00:53:17,279 --> 00:53:18,488
Kirk! Now!

1396
00:53:23,827 --> 00:53:24,953
♪ <i>Ba, ba, ba
Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba</i>

1397
00:53:25,203 --> 00:53:28,748
<i>♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba</i>

1398
00:53:28,957 --> 00:53:31,376
<i>♪ Ba, ba, ba
Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba ♪</i>

1399
00:53:34,462 --> 00:53:36,256
- I want to thank you, Luke.
- Oh, you're welcome, Kirk.

1400
00:53:36,464 --> 00:53:37,841
Now before I go,

1401
00:53:38,049 --> 00:53:40,010
we should get
our stories straight about
what happened tonight.

1402
00:53:40,260 --> 00:53:42,095
Uh, your car broke down,
I drove to Hartford,

1403
00:53:42,304 --> 00:53:43,471
picked you up
and drove you back home.

1404
00:53:43,680 --> 00:53:46,183
Or you broke down,
I drove to Hartford
and picked you up,

1405
00:53:46,391 --> 00:53:47,434
and drove you
back home.

1406
00:53:47,642 --> 00:53:48,727
- What?
- Much better story.

1407
00:53:48,935 --> 00:53:49,686
No.

1408
00:53:49,895 --> 00:53:51,521
My business is
young, Luke.

1409
00:53:51,730 --> 00:53:53,356
There's kinks
to work out.

1410
00:53:53,607 --> 00:53:55,817
People don't want
to know how the
sausage gets made.

1411
00:53:56,026 --> 00:53:57,068
They just
want to eat.

1412
00:53:57,277 --> 00:53:59,529
There's no arguing
or even responding
to that, Kirk.

1413
00:53:59,738 --> 00:54:01,281
Great. Thank you.

1414
00:54:01,489 --> 00:54:02,532
Damn it.

1415
00:54:03,074 --> 00:54:04,701
Petal, stop right now!

1416
00:54:04,951 --> 00:54:07,537
I know you hear me!
I know you hear me!

1417
00:54:07,746 --> 00:54:10,624
You get back here!
Curb right! Curb right!

1418
00:54:10,832 --> 00:54:12,876
<i>- Go, Petal!</i>
- Don't encourage her!

1419
00:54:16,379 --> 00:54:17,923
- What's all this?
- What?

1420
00:54:18,131 --> 00:54:19,591
Dictionary,
thesaurus,

1421
00:54:19,799 --> 00:54:22,344
<i>Mathematical Principles
of Natural Philosophy...</i>

1422
00:54:22,552 --> 00:54:24,387
Aw, you got
a letter from April.

1423
00:54:24,596 --> 00:54:27,265
I was two hours
into deciphering it,
and then I got your call.

1424
00:54:27,474 --> 00:54:28,391
"Hello, <i>Pater--"</i>

1425
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:30,477
- "Father,"
British or Latin.
- Sure.

1426
00:54:30,685 --> 00:54:32,604
She used the word
"ontological"
three times.

1427
00:54:32,812 --> 00:54:34,731
She used it last time too,
and I looked it up
and then I forgot it.

1428
00:54:34,940 --> 00:54:36,650
And I was looking it up
again and then you called.

1429
00:54:36,858 --> 00:54:39,319
Well, that's what you
get when you spawn
an MIT-going genius.

1430
00:54:39,527 --> 00:54:41,947
Well, Rory's smart.
She speaks like she
doesn't need subtitles.

1431
00:54:42,239 --> 00:54:43,323
Yeah, but she grew up
with me.

1432
00:54:43,531 --> 00:54:46,076
She learned all
her language skills
via <i>The Breakfast Club.</i>

1433
00:54:46,785 --> 00:54:48,453
- Hey, how old is
this coffee?
- Old.

1434
00:54:48,703 --> 00:54:49,663
Oh, well.

1435
00:54:50,997 --> 00:54:52,415
- Hey, Luke--
- What are you doing?

1436
00:54:52,624 --> 00:54:54,918
- Eating sprinkles.
- Wait, but...
Never mind.

1437
00:54:55,126 --> 00:54:57,128
Uh, did I tell you?

1438
00:54:57,337 --> 00:54:59,214
Michel's husband
Frederick wants a baby.

1439
00:54:59,422 --> 00:55:00,882
Frederick,
the guy who came in

1440
00:55:01,091 --> 00:55:02,759
and ordered three pancakes
on three separate plates?

1441
00:55:02,968 --> 00:55:04,928
The town ought
to pitch in and
buy another pig.

1442
00:55:05,136 --> 00:55:07,097
I can't watch
this anymore.

1443
00:55:08,098 --> 00:55:10,600
Hey, Luke,
did you ever
want a kid?

1444
00:55:11,268 --> 00:55:13,436
- I have a kid.
- No, I mean a fresh kid.

1445
00:55:13,853 --> 00:55:16,231
What the hell
is a fresh kid?

1446
00:55:16,439 --> 00:55:19,234
A kid that's fresh.
A kid with me.

1447
00:55:20,151 --> 00:55:22,904
We never had
a serious conversation
about it, I don't think.

1448
00:55:23,113 --> 00:55:24,948
That moment at
the Twickham house,
but since then...

1449
00:55:25,156 --> 00:55:28,952
Well, I figured if you
wanted another kid,
you would say something.

1450
00:55:29,160 --> 00:55:31,329
I figured
if you wanted another kid,
you'd say something.

1451
00:55:31,538 --> 00:55:32,831
- I brought it up once.
- When?

1452
00:55:33,039 --> 00:55:34,374
- Five, six years ago.
- I don't remember.

1453
00:55:34,582 --> 00:55:35,583
At the little league game.

1454
00:55:35,792 --> 00:55:37,002
There was that kid
playing right field,

1455
00:55:37,210 --> 00:55:38,128
and he walked off
in the middle of an inning

1456
00:55:38,378 --> 00:55:39,212
to use the bathroom.

1457
00:55:39,421 --> 00:55:41,006
I turned to you and I said,
"That's the kid."

1458
00:55:42,382 --> 00:55:44,175
- "That's the kid"?
- Yes.

1459
00:55:44,384 --> 00:55:46,469
"That's the kid"
is your way of saying
you want to have a kid?

1460
00:55:46,678 --> 00:55:47,470
In so many words.

1461
00:55:47,679 --> 00:55:50,056
No, "That's the kid" is
not you saying you want
to have a kid.

1462
00:55:50,265 --> 00:55:52,684
"That's the kid" is you
acknowledging that that's
the kid who's standing there

1463
00:55:52,892 --> 00:55:54,102
about whom you just said,
"That's the kid."

1464
00:55:54,311 --> 00:55:55,562
I thought you knew
what I was getting at.

1465
00:55:55,770 --> 00:55:57,647
Impossible, because
I don't speak "huh"?

1466
00:55:57,856 --> 00:56:00,859
Well... That's what
I thought and you didn't
pursue it, so...

1467
00:56:01,067 --> 00:56:02,319
- It was up to me
to pursue it?
<i>- No.</i>

1468
00:56:02,527 --> 00:56:04,154
Sorry, I...

1469
00:56:05,822 --> 00:56:07,615
Well, how do you
feel about it now?

1470
00:56:07,824 --> 00:56:09,492
<i>What?</i>

1471
00:56:09,701 --> 00:56:10,869
Do you still want a kid?

1472
00:56:11,077 --> 00:56:13,997
Oh, well, I mean...
I mean, isn't it,
uh, too late?

1473
00:56:14,205 --> 00:56:14,998
I don't know.

1474
00:56:15,206 --> 00:56:16,207
<i>Look, forget it.</i>

1475
00:56:16,416 --> 00:56:18,209
I have kids.
I have April,

1476
00:56:18,418 --> 00:56:21,504
and I've always
considered Rory to be
a little bit mine, so...

1477
00:56:21,713 --> 00:56:23,506
Yeah, but she was
so much fun to raise.

1478
00:56:24,466 --> 00:56:25,759
Don't you want to
have that kind of fun?

1479
00:56:25,967 --> 00:56:28,345
I have plenty of fun.
Look at all the chairs
I get to put on tables.

1480
00:56:28,553 --> 00:56:30,722
You don't wanna
toss a ball around
with your son?

1481
00:56:30,930 --> 00:56:31,681
There's Jess.

1482
00:56:31,848 --> 00:56:33,016
I said toss
a ball "with" not "at."

1483
00:56:33,224 --> 00:56:34,309
I'm fine.

1484
00:56:34,517 --> 00:56:36,269
You'll never get to see
your own kid's graduation.

1485
00:56:36,478 --> 00:56:37,979
I went to
Rory's graduation.

1486
00:56:38,980 --> 00:56:40,065
It's not the same.

1487
00:56:40,273 --> 00:56:41,524
I know it's not the same.

1488
00:56:43,026 --> 00:56:44,611
I just don't want you
to miss out on anything.

1489
00:56:44,819 --> 00:56:47,072
Yeah, well, nobody gets
to have everything they
want in life.

1490
00:56:47,364 --> 00:56:49,574
All in all, I think
I did pretty good.

1491
00:56:56,790 --> 00:56:58,416
<i>Okay,
Sandy, see you then.</i>

1492
00:56:58,625 --> 00:57:00,460
<i>Who's Sandy?</i>
<i>Do you have
to know everything?</i>

1493
00:57:00,668 --> 00:57:03,046
<i>I'm your best friend
and business partner, so yes.</i>

1494
00:57:03,254 --> 00:57:05,048
<i>Sandy is our surrogate.</i>

1495
00:57:05,256 --> 00:57:06,549
<i>You're doing it.</i>
<i>We're
thinking about it.</i>

1496
00:57:06,800 --> 00:57:07,634
<i>Exciting!</i>

1497
00:57:07,842 --> 00:57:11,388
<i>I just hope
it works. A baby would
really help everything.</i>

1498
00:57:11,596 --> 00:57:13,973
<i>- We want cake!
- Coming. Take it.</i>

1499
00:57:14,182 --> 00:57:15,600
<i>Who's gonna help me
light the candles?</i>

1500
00:57:15,809 --> 00:57:17,811
<i>- I will, I will!
- Fun, fun, fun!</i>

1501
00:57:26,486 --> 00:57:28,238
Here you go.
Freshly made.

1502
00:57:28,446 --> 00:57:31,157
Thanks.
It's been at least an hour
since my last infusion.

1503
00:57:31,366 --> 00:57:32,784
So, I have all
your paperwork.

1504
00:57:32,992 --> 00:57:34,536
I'll make sure
everything's in order.

1505
00:57:34,744 --> 00:57:35,954
You can flip through
this while you wait.

1506
00:57:36,162 --> 00:57:37,330
Thanks.

1507
00:57:42,544 --> 00:57:43,670
Really good coffee.

1508
00:57:43,878 --> 00:57:45,713
- Is it?
- Yep. Strong.
A little crunchy.

1509
00:57:45,922 --> 00:57:46,923
Good. Good.

1510
00:57:48,299 --> 00:57:51,136
Okay, I will
take a look.

1511
00:57:56,266 --> 00:57:58,476
- Hey, you're supposed
to be looking with me.
- Oh, sorry.

1512
00:57:58,726 --> 00:58:00,770
So, what are we
looking at here?

1513
00:58:00,979 --> 00:58:02,772
- Potential surrogates.
- Surrogates. Yes.

1514
00:58:02,981 --> 00:58:04,774
And these
surrogates will...

1515
00:58:04,983 --> 00:58:06,484
- Carry the baby.
- Our baby.

1516
00:58:06,693 --> 00:58:08,194
Yes. They'll carry
our baby.

1517
00:58:08,403 --> 00:58:09,070
I'm confused.

1518
00:58:09,279 --> 00:58:11,489
Am I supposed to
be having sex with
these women?

1519
00:58:11,698 --> 00:58:13,575
- What?
- Because I don't wanna
have sex with her.

1520
00:58:13,825 --> 00:58:15,910
No, you're not supposed
to be having sex with
these women.

1521
00:58:16,119 --> 00:58:18,121
- What? You'd have
sex with her?
- No.

1522
00:58:18,329 --> 00:58:19,581
- How about her?
- No.

1523
00:58:20,331 --> 00:58:21,624
Ooh, she's holding a bat.

1524
00:58:21,833 --> 00:58:23,293
You could play softball
and then do it in the dugout.

1525
00:58:23,543 --> 00:58:24,878
I don't want to
have sex with her.

1526
00:58:25,086 --> 00:58:26,463
I don't want
to have sex with
any of these women.

1527
00:58:26,671 --> 00:58:28,214
I don't want to have
sex with anyone ever.

1528
00:58:28,423 --> 00:58:29,591
Except me.

1529
00:58:29,799 --> 00:58:31,176
Lorelai,
why are we here?

1530
00:58:31,384 --> 00:58:32,969
Look, I tried to broach
the subject of adoption.

1531
00:58:33,178 --> 00:58:34,804
I don't want to
go to Bangladesh
to get a baby.

1532
00:58:35,013 --> 00:58:36,556
I don't want to go
to Woodbury to get
a light bulb.

1533
00:58:36,764 --> 00:58:38,516
Well, if we don't adopt,
this might be our only option,

1534
00:58:38,725 --> 00:58:40,101
and I don't want
another picture window.

1535
00:58:40,310 --> 00:58:41,853
What?

1536
00:58:42,061 --> 00:58:44,230
When we remodeled the house,
you wanted a picture window,

1537
00:58:44,439 --> 00:58:46,274
but it looked weird
with the other windows

1538
00:58:46,483 --> 00:58:48,234
and so you gave it up.
You settled.

1539
00:58:48,443 --> 00:58:50,737
I do not
remember wanting
a picture window.

1540
00:58:50,945 --> 00:58:53,323
Well, you did.
Now it's just another
thing on the list of

1541
00:58:53,531 --> 00:58:55,325
"things I don't get to have
because I'm with Lorelai."

1542
00:58:55,575 --> 00:58:57,869
- Like peace.
- And a picture window.

1543
00:58:58,077 --> 00:59:00,205
I do not want
a picture window.

1544
00:59:00,455 --> 00:59:03,875
<i>Moron!
When I say "a VIP,"
I mean a VIP.</i>

1545
00:59:04,167 --> 00:59:05,126
<i>I got them coffee.</i>

1546
00:59:05,335 --> 00:59:07,879
<i>Well, if we were
a Starbucks, you'd be
employee of the month.</i>

1547
00:59:08,087 --> 00:59:11,549
<i>But since we're not,
you're just the first Smith
grad I've fired this week.</i>

1548
00:59:11,758 --> 00:59:15,220
Lorelai! So great to see you!
I am so sorry for the wait.

1549
00:59:15,428 --> 00:59:16,596
Oh, Paris,
that's fine.

1550
00:59:16,804 --> 00:59:17,764
Don't stand there
shaking. Just go.

1551
00:59:17,972 --> 00:59:19,057
Apologize to your parents.

1552
00:59:19,265 --> 00:59:21,851
Tell them you'll pay them
back for the two semesters
you spent studing

1553
00:59:22,060 --> 00:59:24,395
<i>Buffy the Vampire Slayer's</i>
effect on the feminist agenda.

1554
00:59:24,604 --> 00:59:27,232
- Okay, so,
hello, Luke.
- Hi.

1555
00:59:27,524 --> 00:59:29,234
- You remember me.
- You're hard to forget.

1556
00:59:29,442 --> 00:59:31,444
Flattering. Let's go.

1557
00:59:32,445 --> 00:59:36,324
<i>Now, I rarely act
as a case personal liaison
anymore,</i>

1558
00:59:36,533 --> 00:59:38,368
<i>but when I heard it
was you coming in,
I said,</i>

1559
00:59:38,576 --> 00:59:40,995
"That woman
was practically
my second mother.

1560
00:59:41,204 --> 00:59:42,956
"No one else is
handling this case."

1561
00:59:43,164 --> 00:59:45,124
Aw, that's very
sweet of you, Paris.

1562
00:59:45,291 --> 00:59:48,211
So, the spiel.
Dynasty Makers.

1563
00:59:48,419 --> 00:59:50,797
We are the largest
full-service fertility

1564
00:59:51,005 --> 00:59:52,840
and surrogacy clinic
in the Western Hemisphere.

1565
00:59:53,049 --> 00:59:56,302
<i>No other company
offers more services,
medical and legal,</i>

1566
00:59:56,511 --> 00:59:58,930
and no company has
a higher approval rating.

1567
00:59:59,222 --> 01:00:00,056
Did you check Yelp?

1568
01:00:00,306 --> 01:00:01,641
- No.
- Check Yelp.

1569
01:00:01,849 --> 01:00:03,601
- Oh.
<i>- So, you know
how this works?</i>

1570
01:00:03,810 --> 01:00:06,479
Uh, we look
through there and pick?

1571
01:00:06,688 --> 01:00:08,940
Give me that.
Bargain-basement breeders.

1572
01:00:09,232 --> 01:00:13,152
I'm not letting any
of those bottle-service
bimbos carry your baby.

1573
01:00:13,361 --> 01:00:16,322
No, for you I pull
out the prime meat.

1574
01:00:18,366 --> 01:00:20,076
Am I blacking out?

1575
01:00:20,285 --> 01:00:21,786
How's Rory?
She back from London?

1576
01:00:21,995 --> 01:00:23,413
She was, but she's there now.

1577
01:00:23,663 --> 01:00:25,456
- Hard to keep track
of our girl, huh?
- Yeah.

1578
01:00:25,707 --> 01:00:29,127
Okay. So,
it's pretty cut and dry here.

1579
01:00:29,335 --> 01:00:30,962
We plant an egg
in a viable body,

1580
01:00:31,170 --> 01:00:32,714
we fertilize it
and out comes a baby.

1581
01:00:32,922 --> 01:00:35,049
Bing bang boom.
Have you thought about eggs?

1582
01:00:35,258 --> 01:00:35,883
Uh...

1583
01:00:36,092 --> 01:00:38,261
Using eggs over
age 44 with IVF,

1584
01:00:38,469 --> 01:00:41,431
the chances of having a baby
is about 1% per try.

1585
01:00:41,639 --> 01:00:42,807
Wow, super fun fact.

1586
01:00:43,016 --> 01:00:44,434
She keep you in stitches,
this one?

1587
01:00:44,642 --> 01:00:46,769
Oh, yeah. Hey,
how much is this
gonna cost?

1588
01:00:47,020 --> 01:00:49,981
A lot. But, again, Lorelai's
the only mother I ever had

1589
01:00:50,189 --> 01:00:53,443
except for Nanny Soledad,
so there's mondo
discounts involved.

1590
01:00:53,651 --> 01:00:55,445
How much time
did you spend
with this girl?

1591
01:00:56,154 --> 01:00:56,946
- So, Luke.
- Yeah.

1592
01:00:57,155 --> 01:00:58,197
How are the boys?

1593
01:00:58,406 --> 01:00:59,866
What? What is she doing?

1594
01:01:00,074 --> 01:01:00,742
I don't know.

1595
01:01:00,950 --> 01:01:03,244
I'm pretty good at
visually sussing out
the situation down there.

1596
01:01:03,453 --> 01:01:05,038
Please stop sussing.

1597
01:01:05,246 --> 01:01:08,291
Just from a cursory glance,
you seem symmetrical
and well-balanced.

1598
01:01:08,499 --> 01:01:10,043
Make sure he
sticks with the boxers.

1599
01:01:10,668 --> 01:01:13,630
Okay, here's a sampling
of what we've got.

1600
01:01:13,838 --> 01:01:17,133
Blondes,
brunettes and redheads.

1601
01:01:17,383 --> 01:01:20,470
<i>Tall, short, athletic, artsy.</i>

1602
01:01:20,720 --> 01:01:24,223
We even got 'em
with a little extra
junk in the trunk,

1603
01:01:24,432 --> 01:01:26,309
if you secretly like
'em that way, Luke.

1604
01:01:26,517 --> 01:01:30,063
I'm sorry.
Am I or am I not having
sex with this woman?

1605
01:01:30,271 --> 01:01:31,522
That's a sick thought.

1606
01:01:31,731 --> 01:01:33,691
Of course you're not
having sex with her.
She's married.

1607
01:01:33,900 --> 01:01:35,026
But you made it
sound like--

1608
01:01:35,234 --> 01:01:36,444
<i>We've got Jews, Christians,</i>

1609
01:01:36,653 --> 01:01:39,447
Muslims, Hindus,
atheists, one Wiccan,

1610
01:01:39,656 --> 01:01:42,033
and for a premium,
you can get
the cream of the crop,

1611
01:01:42,283 --> 01:01:44,369
top of the line, army wives.

1612
01:01:44,577 --> 01:01:46,829
<i>Sturdy, reliable,
great at packing.</i>

1613
01:01:47,080 --> 01:01:50,917
Oh, wait, sorry.
I have to take her
off the available list.

1614
01:01:51,125 --> 01:01:54,462
She just conceived.
Very high-profile client.

1615
01:01:54,671 --> 01:01:56,756
Let's just call him...
Doogie Howser.

1616
01:01:56,964 --> 01:01:58,508
You mean
Neil Patrick Harris?

1617
01:01:58,716 --> 01:02:00,343
Wow. Little louder, please.

1618
01:02:00,551 --> 01:02:02,261
Okay, so now
his cover's blown,

1619
01:02:02,470 --> 01:02:04,097
but, yes,
it's Neil Patrick Harris.

1620
01:02:04,305 --> 01:02:05,348
What kind of a cover--

1621
01:02:05,556 --> 01:02:06,557
It's Neil Patrick Harris.

1622
01:02:06,808 --> 01:02:08,309
Did you hear?
It's Neil Patrick Harris.

1623
01:02:08,518 --> 01:02:09,394
I did hear, yes.

1624
01:02:09,602 --> 01:02:10,353
Neil Patrick Harris.

1625
01:02:10,561 --> 01:02:11,604
You look upset, Luke.

1626
01:02:11,813 --> 01:02:12,814
No. Not upset.

1627
01:02:13,022 --> 01:02:14,315
What makes you
think I'm upset?

1628
01:02:14,524 --> 01:02:16,442
Well, you're not that excited
about Neil Patrick Harris.

1629
01:02:16,651 --> 01:02:20,530
Well, I'm very excited
for Neil Patrick Harris
if this is what he wants.

1630
01:02:20,780 --> 01:02:21,739
Is it not what you want?

1631
01:02:21,948 --> 01:02:23,116
- I...
<i>- I understand.</i>

1632
01:02:23,324 --> 01:02:24,575
<i>It's a big decision,
having kids.</i>

1633
01:02:24,784 --> 01:02:27,787
There's rewards,
but also constant
panic and worry.

1634
01:02:27,995 --> 01:02:30,206
<i>Are they healthy?
Does everything work?
Are they smart?</i>

1635
01:02:30,415 --> 01:02:32,083
McDonald's fry
stations are filled

1636
01:02:32,333 --> 01:02:34,085
with college-educated
moderate achievers.

1637
01:02:34,377 --> 01:02:35,962
<i>And then there's
the lottery of nature.</i>

1638
01:02:36,170 --> 01:02:37,672
I mean, I said to Neil,

1639
01:02:37,880 --> 01:02:40,591
"Are you prepared to have
a really unattractive child

1640
01:02:40,842 --> 01:02:42,260
"that would not
look good on camera?

1641
01:02:42,510 --> 01:02:44,721
<i>"Would you be
okay if your child</i>

1642
01:02:44,929 --> 01:02:46,931
"was not
an actor but an agent?"

1643
01:02:47,140 --> 01:02:48,307
I need to leave.

1644
01:02:48,516 --> 01:02:49,475
Luke, wait.

1645
01:02:51,686 --> 01:02:54,355
Oh.
Sorry, Paris, I--

1646
01:02:54,564 --> 01:02:58,151
Yes. Go. Talk it through.
I'll send you a DVD
of my top picks.

1647
01:02:58,359 --> 01:03:00,153
I'll also include
a copy of <i>Gone Girl.</i>

1648
01:03:00,361 --> 01:03:01,529
N.P.H. was great in that.

1649
01:03:01,738 --> 01:03:02,822
Thanks.

1650
01:03:05,825 --> 01:03:06,868
No.

1651
01:03:11,330 --> 01:03:13,207
♪ <i>La, la, la</i>

1652
01:03:13,416 --> 01:03:14,542
<i>♪ La, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la</i>

1653
01:03:20,465 --> 01:03:22,717
Thank you, Francis.

1654
01:03:24,844 --> 01:03:26,929
Oh, sod it, bring the bottle.
We're celebrating.

1655
01:03:29,557 --> 01:03:31,768
I love coming here
because they hate that I do.

1656
01:03:31,976 --> 01:03:32,769
Really?

1657
01:03:32,977 --> 01:03:34,187
They wouldn't let
women in the doors

1658
01:03:34,395 --> 01:03:36,355
until the mid '80s.
And then it was only
supposed to be

1659
01:03:36,564 --> 01:03:40,067
well-behaved
wives with tiny feet,
not hellions like myself.

1660
01:03:41,194 --> 01:03:42,320
I helped kick
open those doors.

1661
01:03:42,570 --> 01:03:43,738
Oh, thank you, love.

1662
01:03:43,946 --> 01:03:45,198
My pleasure, Ms. Shropshire.

1663
01:03:46,449 --> 01:03:48,826
So, to us.

1664
01:03:49,076 --> 01:03:50,870
Hellions in arms.

1665
01:03:53,206 --> 01:03:57,168
Mmm. I must tell you,
I've had such amazing feedback

1666
01:03:57,376 --> 01:03:58,628
for the "Talk of
the Town" piece.

1667
01:03:58,878 --> 01:04:00,338
Far more than for anything
I've ever written.

1668
01:04:00,546 --> 01:04:01,881
Oh, I doubt that.

1669
01:04:02,089 --> 01:04:03,966
So, the book.

1670
01:04:04,217 --> 01:04:06,052
- Yes.
- I go back and forth,

1671
01:04:06,260 --> 01:04:07,512
back and forth, you know.

1672
01:04:07,804 --> 01:04:09,680
I never really wanted
to write about myself.

1673
01:04:09,889 --> 01:04:13,643
My fields are feminism,
environmentalism,
and who am I?

1674
01:04:15,019 --> 01:04:20,316
But if I found
someone really like-minded
who I could write it with,

1675
01:04:20,525 --> 01:04:24,570
somebody like yourself...
Well, that's intriguing.

1676
01:04:24,779 --> 01:04:26,823
You know, I've never done
anything like this before.

1677
01:04:27,031 --> 01:04:29,367
Oh, I don't care about that.
I only care that it's honest.

1678
01:04:29,575 --> 01:04:32,119
I want to be seen as
I am, warts and all.

1679
01:04:32,328 --> 01:04:33,371
I'm great with warts.

1680
01:04:33,579 --> 01:04:37,166
Even if I waver,
if I let my
vanity in the door,

1681
01:04:37,375 --> 01:04:39,210
you must remain steadfast.

1682
01:04:39,502 --> 01:04:42,004
Francis, what is that?

1683
01:04:42,213 --> 01:04:45,341
Uh, this is the fluke
carpaccio with lime
and chilies.

1684
01:04:45,550 --> 01:04:46,801
Is it?

1685
01:04:47,093 --> 01:04:49,512
And who's the genius
who ordered this
magnificent dish?

1686
01:04:49,720 --> 01:04:51,556
Uh, Dr. Reynolds
over there.

1687
01:04:52,056 --> 01:04:53,432
Hmm...

1688
01:04:53,724 --> 01:04:55,685
Would it be possible
for this particular plate

1689
01:04:55,935 --> 01:04:58,312
to go missing and
for you to rush back

1690
01:04:58,521 --> 01:05:00,565
and get another one
for the darling
doctor over there?

1691
01:05:00,773 --> 01:05:02,233
Uh, of course, Naomi.

1692
01:05:05,903 --> 01:05:08,531
Oh, it's delicious.

1693
01:05:08,739 --> 01:05:11,409
Everything
tastes so much better
when it's stolen.

1694
01:05:11,617 --> 01:05:13,452
Mmm, that is good.

1695
01:05:13,661 --> 01:05:15,913
Mmm, so, let's
talk time frame.

1696
01:05:16,205 --> 01:05:17,707
I think it'll be
about eight weeks

1697
01:05:17,915 --> 01:05:19,750
to work up a proposal
for the publishers

1698
01:05:19,959 --> 01:05:21,502
and supply a sample chapter.

1699
01:05:21,878 --> 01:05:24,255
How much access
can you give me?
Interviews are everything.

1700
01:05:24,547 --> 01:05:27,383
Oh, full access, darling.
Follow me everywhere
except the loo.

1701
01:05:28,676 --> 01:05:30,011
Actually,
the loo's fine, too.

1702
01:05:30,219 --> 01:05:31,637
Francis,
who's that burger for?

1703
01:05:31,846 --> 01:05:33,222
Um, Ms. Kipney.

1704
01:05:33,431 --> 01:05:36,684
Trust me, she won't
enjoy it. Half of it's
going to her dog.

1705
01:05:37,977 --> 01:05:40,771
So, um, the only
thing left to discuss
is financial stuff.

1706
01:05:41,022 --> 01:05:42,523
And the lawyers can
take care of that, right?

1707
01:05:42,732 --> 01:05:45,443
It's 50-50.
Split down the middle.
We're in this together. Yes?

1708
01:05:45,651 --> 01:05:46,986
Yes.

1709
01:05:47,194 --> 01:05:48,446
Right.

1710
01:05:48,654 --> 01:05:51,198
Now, keep your eyes
peeled for dessert.

1711
01:05:53,326 --> 01:05:57,079
I can't believe
it's only 2:00.
2:00 in the afternoon.

1712
01:05:57,330 --> 01:05:59,123
I feel like I've
been awake for days.

1713
01:05:59,373 --> 01:06:03,127
It's the jet lag.
And the bourbon.
I drank straight bourbon.

1714
01:06:03,336 --> 01:06:05,463
I'm now a mid-day
straight bourbon drinker.

1715
01:06:05,671 --> 01:06:07,423
I'm gonna have to learn
to keep up with Naomi

1716
01:06:07,673 --> 01:06:09,467
if I'm going to
write this book.

1717
01:06:09,675 --> 01:06:11,469
I mean, she drinks as
fast as she talks,

1718
01:06:11,677 --> 01:06:13,554
and she never even seems
to get tipsy at all.

1719
01:06:13,763 --> 01:06:15,806
If anything, she seemed to get
smarter and more coherent.

1720
01:06:16,057 --> 01:06:18,976
Or maybe she
just seems smarter
and more coherent.

1721
01:06:19,185 --> 01:06:20,353
This is great, right?

1722
01:06:20,561 --> 01:06:22,104
I mean, now I have
something concrete

1723
01:06:22,313 --> 01:06:23,940
to talk about at my
Conde Nast meeting,

1724
01:06:24,148 --> 01:06:26,233
and she already mentioned
publishing excerpts of it

1725
01:06:26,442 --> 01:06:28,986
in <i>Vanity Fair,</i>
which would be amazing.

1726
01:06:29,195 --> 01:06:32,406
It's not really what I do,
but it's good for now.

1727
01:06:33,074 --> 01:06:35,451
And it's money.
Money is nice.

1728
01:06:35,660 --> 01:06:37,328
So, now I just have to hang
out with her more

1729
01:06:37,536 --> 01:06:39,205
so that I can get a handle
on the first few chapters

1730
01:06:39,538 --> 01:06:41,499
so we can bid it out
and see who wants it.

1731
01:06:41,707 --> 01:06:44,001
All that starts in a month,
when she gets back from India.

1732
01:06:44,251 --> 01:06:46,879
So, basically, I just
had a really good day.
How was your day?

1733
01:06:47,088 --> 01:06:49,131
Well, I had my dry
cleaning delivered.

1734
01:06:49,382 --> 01:06:50,633
- Oh, I think I win.
- I don't know.

1735
01:06:50,841 --> 01:06:52,259
I really like
these pants, so...

1736
01:06:53,803 --> 01:06:54,720
I'm glad it went well.

1737
01:06:54,929 --> 01:06:55,721
It did.

1738
01:06:56,389 --> 01:06:58,099
Tonight, I'll take
you out to celebrate.

1739
01:06:58,307 --> 01:06:59,141
I'd like that.

1740
01:06:59,350 --> 01:07:01,936
And, tomorrow, I'll tell you
all the things I've heard
about Naomi Shropshire.

1741
01:07:02,144 --> 01:07:03,854
I don't care if
she's difficult.

1742
01:07:04,063 --> 01:07:06,357
Oh, she's difficult
and a little weird.

1743
01:07:06,565 --> 01:07:08,651
Well, I like weird.
I was formed by weird.

1744
01:07:08,859 --> 01:07:10,820
If it comes together,
it could be great,
and you deserve that.

1745
01:07:11,070 --> 01:07:13,072
I do.
I do deserve that.

1746
01:07:13,280 --> 01:07:15,491
Did I tell you
she lost her shoes
at the club?

1747
01:07:15,700 --> 01:07:16,575
You did not.

1748
01:07:16,784 --> 01:07:18,411
<i>I didn't even notice
until we were leaving.</i>

1749
01:07:18,619 --> 01:07:19,829
She was walking as
if she had shoes on.

1750
01:07:20,037 --> 01:07:21,205
And then I mentioned it,
and she said,

1751
01:07:21,414 --> 01:07:22,707
"Oh, I just left
them somewhere."

1752
01:07:22,915 --> 01:07:24,792
How do you leave
them somewhere?
It's snowing outside.

1753
01:07:25,001 --> 01:07:25,793
See? Weird.

1754
01:07:26,043 --> 01:07:26,919
Weird makes good copy.

1755
01:07:27,128 --> 01:07:28,254
So does a great writer.

1756
01:07:28,462 --> 01:07:30,423
Wow, those pants did put
you in a good mood.

1757
01:07:32,717 --> 01:07:34,176
Do you really have
to go back to work?

1758
01:07:34,385 --> 01:07:36,470
I can't let the pants be
the main accomplishment
of my day.

1759
01:07:36,679 --> 01:07:38,764
Plus, I have some
competition now. You're
going to be an author.

1760
01:07:38,973 --> 01:07:40,266
It's not
like I'm John McPhee

1761
01:07:40,474 --> 01:07:41,434
- or anything.
- Yet.

1762
01:07:41,642 --> 01:07:43,310
I'll send the car
for you at 8:00.

1763
01:07:43,894 --> 01:07:44,895
I'm gonna use
your desktop, okay?

1764
01:07:45,104 --> 01:07:45,813
All yours.

1765
01:07:46,022 --> 01:07:47,940
Hey, where are those
boxes that I had sent here?

1766
01:07:48,149 --> 01:07:49,400
I think the maid stuffed
them in the closet.

1767
01:07:49,608 --> 01:07:51,235
- I need to look for something.
- Your lucky outfit?

1768
01:07:51,444 --> 01:07:52,486
Do not mock.

1769
01:07:52,737 --> 01:07:54,071
I am not mocking.
It's a great outfit.

1770
01:07:54,321 --> 01:07:55,948
You were wearing it
when I saw you in Hamburg.

1771
01:07:57,783 --> 01:08:00,745
Hey, is there anything in here
that you don't want me to see?

1772
01:08:00,953 --> 01:08:02,413
Like body parts?

1773
01:08:02,621 --> 01:08:04,040
That would be
on the list, sure.

1774
01:08:04,248 --> 01:08:07,626
No, like, uh,
other girls' things.

1775
01:08:07,960 --> 01:08:09,420
- All clear.
- Okay.

1776
01:08:09,712 --> 01:08:12,381
Hey, I wouldn't do that.

1777
01:08:13,049 --> 01:08:15,051
You know, leave things
around for you just to...

1778
01:08:15,259 --> 01:08:17,553
- I wasn't accusing--
- I know. I'm just...

1779
01:08:17,803 --> 01:08:22,099
Look, we have an agreement.
What happens in
Vegas stays in Vegas.

1780
01:08:22,308 --> 01:08:23,642
We do.

1781
01:08:24,477 --> 01:08:26,979
And when we leave Vegas,
we forget about Vegas

1782
01:08:27,188 --> 01:08:29,982
until we're back in Vegas
and then it's just us
in Vegas until we're not.

1783
01:08:30,191 --> 01:08:31,233
Throw me a rope, man.

1784
01:08:33,110 --> 01:08:34,028
I'll see you at 8:00.

1785
01:08:38,115 --> 01:08:39,200
Your phone.

1786
01:08:39,450 --> 01:08:40,493
<i>What's it say?</i>

1787
01:08:40,701 --> 01:08:42,411
"Paul dinner. Don't forget."

1788
01:08:42,620 --> 01:08:43,412
<i>Oh, crap.</i>

1789
01:08:43,704 --> 01:08:44,872
That's a lot of
exclamation points.

1790
01:08:45,081 --> 01:08:45,706
I forgot.

1791
01:08:45,873 --> 01:08:47,458
It was all
the excitement
about my pants, right?

1792
01:08:47,666 --> 01:08:48,501
- But--
- Go. Vegas.

1793
01:08:48,709 --> 01:08:49,668
Yes. Vegas.

1794
01:08:51,587 --> 01:08:54,048
I've got to
break up with this guy.

1795
01:09:02,431 --> 01:09:03,891
Excuse me, your password?

1796
01:09:04,100 --> 01:09:05,476
Wafflehousebutterbob.

1797
01:09:05,684 --> 01:09:07,269
Cute.
Isn't it, though?

1798
01:09:07,478 --> 01:09:08,938
Okay, I'm here now.

1799
01:09:09,188 --> 01:09:11,315
Uh-huh. You two,
park it over there.

1800
01:09:12,066 --> 01:09:13,609
No, there is
no return policy.

1801
01:09:13,818 --> 01:09:15,402
What's she going
to return? It's a baby.

1802
01:09:16,362 --> 01:09:17,696
Fine. I'll call and see
if she wants it,

1803
01:09:18,030 --> 01:09:20,282
but last time it was Brad
who put the kibosh on it.

1804
01:09:20,491 --> 01:09:21,909
- Hello, Luke.
- Paris, hey.

1805
01:09:22,118 --> 01:09:23,953
Could you bring them
a salad, no croutons?

1806
01:09:24,161 --> 01:09:25,955
<i>And don't let them con
you into Diet Cokes.</i>

1807
01:09:26,205 --> 01:09:29,166
- Listen, I wanted to
apologize for the other day.
- Oh, no need.

1808
01:09:29,375 --> 01:09:30,835
I've been in this
racket for years,

1809
01:09:31,085 --> 01:09:33,254
and sometimes I'm a little too
"Let's get down to it."

1810
01:09:33,462 --> 01:09:35,548
- You know? Think I may
have scared you a bit.
- Not at all.

1811
01:09:35,756 --> 01:09:39,135
Look, you just
need to know I'm good.

1812
01:09:39,343 --> 01:09:41,345
I'm the Pablo Escobar
of the fertility world.

1813
01:09:41,554 --> 01:09:43,848
I move the best product,
and I would really
like to help.

1814
01:09:44,056 --> 01:09:45,641
- I appreciate that, but--
- I get it.

1815
01:09:45,891 --> 01:09:48,102
You're a small-town boy.
You get your milk
from a cow.

1816
01:09:48,310 --> 01:09:50,437
Actually, everybody
gets their milk from a cow.

1817
01:09:50,646 --> 01:09:53,023
So I thought I'd make it
a little more homey for you.

1818
01:09:53,232 --> 01:09:54,859
Girls, I'd like you
to meet Luke Danes.

1819
01:09:55,067 --> 01:09:56,861
<i>Jill and Jane are
two of my top breeders.</i>

1820
01:09:57,403 --> 01:09:59,405
- Excuse me?
- I thought you could
all sit and talk.

1821
01:09:59,738 --> 01:10:01,407
Get to know them.
Ask them questions.

1822
01:10:01,615 --> 01:10:02,867
Challenge Jill
to an arm wrestle.

1823
01:10:03,159 --> 01:10:04,827
I think you'll be
pleasantly surprised.

1824
01:10:10,583 --> 01:10:11,667
Dragonfly Inn.

1825
01:10:11,876 --> 01:10:13,210
Michel, put Lorelai
on the phone.

1826
01:10:13,419 --> 01:10:14,170
Who is calling?

1827
01:10:14,378 --> 01:10:15,045
Michel!

1828
01:10:15,254 --> 01:10:18,132
Oh, Luke.
How nice to hear
your siren call.

1829
01:10:18,340 --> 01:10:20,885
Michel, you find Lorelai
and tell her that there are

1830
01:10:21,093 --> 01:10:22,344
two arm-wrestling
breeders here

1831
01:10:22,553 --> 01:10:23,596
and I need her help!

1832
01:10:23,804 --> 01:10:24,763
What?

1833
01:10:26,849 --> 01:10:27,933
Paris?

1834
01:10:28,225 --> 01:10:30,186
- Rory, hi!
- What are you doing here?

1835
01:10:30,394 --> 01:10:31,645
- Oh, I'm working.
- Here?

1836
01:10:31,854 --> 01:10:33,230
Wherever there's
an old or defective uterus.

1837
01:10:33,439 --> 01:10:34,940
I did not hang up, Michel!

1838
01:10:35,149 --> 01:10:35,774
You eating?

1839
01:10:35,941 --> 01:10:38,319
No, I'm actually
just grabbing coffee.
So jet-lagged.

1840
01:10:38,527 --> 01:10:40,696
Then I'm heading to your
place. Oh, can I crash
at your place?

1841
01:10:40,946 --> 01:10:42,031
Absolutely,
you have the key.

1842
01:10:42,239 --> 01:10:43,449
Find her!

1843
01:10:43,657 --> 01:10:45,659
I have to run
an errand first.
You wanna come with?

1844
01:10:45,868 --> 01:10:50,581
Sure. Ladies,
I'll be back in a few.
Close the deal.

1845
01:10:50,789 --> 01:10:53,417
Excuse me?
I don't think
the Wi-Fi is working.

1846
01:10:53,626 --> 01:10:55,920
Capital "B" on "butter."
Yeah, I'm still here, Michel.

1847
01:10:56,170 --> 01:10:56,837
Luke!

1848
01:10:57,046 --> 01:10:58,088
Not now, Taylor.

1849
01:10:58,297 --> 01:11:00,716
Well, then when?
I have called,
I've left messages,

1850
01:11:00,925 --> 01:11:03,177
I even slipped folded notes
under your door at night.

1851
01:11:03,385 --> 01:11:04,637
Which I promptly turned
over to the FBI.

1852
01:11:04,845 --> 01:11:08,432
I know for a fact
that you have had
septic tank issues.

1853
01:11:08,641 --> 01:11:11,268
Taylor, do you
see people in here
trying to eat?

1854
01:11:11,560 --> 01:11:13,646
I do. And you know
what happens after
they eat?

1855
01:11:13,854 --> 01:11:14,647
Oh, jeez...

1856
01:11:14,939 --> 01:11:15,940
It's still not working.

1857
01:11:16,190 --> 01:11:19,276
Luke, I love this town.
Do you love this town?

1858
01:11:19,485 --> 01:11:20,444
- No.
<i>- Excuse me.</i>

1859
01:11:20,653 --> 01:11:22,446
Could the capital
"B" be on "bob,"
not "butter"?

1860
01:11:22,655 --> 01:11:25,783
I think this town
is destined for greatness.

1861
01:11:25,991 --> 01:11:27,618
All the pieces are there.

1862
01:11:27,868 --> 01:11:30,204
It's just a matter
of finding that
special something

1863
01:11:30,412 --> 01:11:31,497
to put it over the top.

1864
01:11:31,705 --> 01:11:32,581
Like a sewer system.

1865
01:11:32,748 --> 01:11:35,000
Yes, because
when you have
a sewer system,

1866
01:11:35,209 --> 01:11:37,962
then you're part of something
bigger than yourself.

1867
01:11:38,170 --> 01:11:41,298
- Like the universe,
only more hygienic.
- Taylor--

1868
01:11:41,590 --> 01:11:43,467
I'm sorry.
The password is
still not working.

1869
01:11:43,676 --> 01:11:47,263
Of course the password's
not working! It's fake!

1870
01:11:47,471 --> 01:11:49,473
He has been giving
out fake passwords

1871
01:11:49,723 --> 01:11:52,226
ever since he got Wi-Fi
in this damn place!

1872
01:11:52,434 --> 01:11:54,311
How stupid are
you people anyway?

1873
01:11:54,561 --> 01:11:56,313
He doesn't want
to give out his password

1874
01:11:56,605 --> 01:11:59,108
because he
doesn't want you here
checking your Facebook,

1875
01:11:59,316 --> 01:12:02,486
or answering your emails,
or youtubing Zoella,

1876
01:12:02,695 --> 01:12:04,488
or whatever the hell
it is you're doing.

1877
01:12:04,738 --> 01:12:09,618
This isn't your office.
It's a diner!
Go home!

1878
01:12:09,827 --> 01:12:12,037
<i>Pay for Wi-Fi!
I do.</i>

1879
01:12:12,246 --> 01:12:14,290
I... Can't...

1880
01:12:15,165 --> 01:12:16,917
You know what?
Never mind.

1881
01:12:17,126 --> 01:12:21,255
I was wrong. You don't
deserve perpetually
unclogged toilets.

1882
01:12:29,888 --> 01:12:30,848
Taylor!

1883
01:12:34,476 --> 01:12:35,561
Really?

1884
01:12:37,396 --> 01:12:38,772
Now that I've gotten--

1885
01:12:41,900 --> 01:12:43,444
Hell of a week.

1886
01:12:43,652 --> 01:12:46,238
♪ <i>Oh, friends</i>

1887
01:12:46,572 --> 01:12:49,992
<i>♪ Waving from
a passenger train</i>

1888
01:12:50,868 --> 01:12:53,245
<i>♪ Oh, boy</i>

1889
01:12:53,454 --> 01:12:57,499
<i>♪ Familiar to me
in impossible ways</i>

1890
01:12:57,708 --> 01:13:00,419
<i>♪ A new day</i>

1891
01:13:00,627 --> 01:13:05,591
<i>♪ A picture in my hands
Of who I used to be ♪</i>

1892
01:13:05,799 --> 01:13:07,009
<i>- Hey!</i>
- Crap!

1893
01:13:07,217 --> 01:13:08,302
<i>Come back here!</i>

1894
01:13:08,510 --> 01:13:10,012
Stop it!
What is wrong with you?

1895
01:13:10,220 --> 01:13:12,681
I told you!
My town, my corner!

1896
01:13:12,890 --> 01:13:14,183
But I'm your sister!

1897
01:13:14,391 --> 01:13:16,518
- No proof of that.
- Ask Mom!

1898
01:13:16,727 --> 01:13:18,687
Mom lies!
You better run, little sister!

1899
01:13:18,896 --> 01:13:22,107
Frankly, it was over
the minute he wanted to do
something creative.

1900
01:13:22,316 --> 01:13:24,735
Wow, you and Doyle split.

1901
01:13:25,027 --> 01:13:27,696
Well, he's a screenwriter
now, Rory. Have you been
to the movies lately?

1902
01:13:27,905 --> 01:13:29,031
I know.

1903
01:13:29,239 --> 01:13:30,366
Suddenly he's in jeans

1904
01:13:30,574 --> 01:13:32,326
and wearing faded
$200 rock T-shirts

1905
01:13:32,534 --> 01:13:34,203
with bands on
them he's never seen.

1906
01:13:34,453 --> 01:13:37,331
He's flying out
to "the coast,"
as if this is not a coast.

1907
01:13:37,539 --> 01:13:39,917
He drinks vodka
because it has less carbs.

1908
01:13:40,125 --> 01:13:41,627
And then he started
selling things and so

1909
01:13:41,835 --> 01:13:44,254
I realized,
"Oh, this is going to stick."

1910
01:13:44,463 --> 01:13:45,881
I am so sorry.

1911
01:13:46,090 --> 01:13:48,342
It's fine.
I'll kill him in court.

1912
01:13:48,884 --> 01:13:49,510
Sure.

1913
01:13:49,718 --> 01:13:52,137
I'll be using that
Def Leppard T-shirt
to clean my windows.

1914
01:13:52,346 --> 01:13:54,556
I've been
waiting a half hour!
It's freezing!

1915
01:13:54,807 --> 01:13:57,893
You should have
thought of that before
you four-starred me last time.

1916
01:13:58,143 --> 01:14:00,396
Don't you maybe wanna
try to work it out nicely?

1917
01:14:00,604 --> 01:14:04,024
I mean, you guys have
kids and you were a really
good team at one point there.

1918
01:14:04,233 --> 01:14:06,819
That was before Brett Ratner
gave him the keys
to his pool house.

1919
01:14:07,027 --> 01:14:10,906
Okay, ladies.
You have arrived.

1920
01:14:11,156 --> 01:14:12,157
Thanks, Kirk.

1921
01:14:12,366 --> 01:14:14,451
You're welcome. Come again.

1922
01:14:14,701 --> 01:14:17,955
- And does Lane have
an extension cord?
- I'll see.

1923
01:14:18,914 --> 01:14:20,457
Look, I know you
guys were friends,

1924
01:14:20,666 --> 01:14:22,793
but if push came to shove,
and we had to make T-shirts...

1925
01:14:23,043 --> 01:14:25,170
- Team Paris all the way.
- Thanks.

1926
01:14:25,379 --> 01:14:27,840
Could you say he
felt you up at our Christmas
party for the deposition?

1927
01:14:28,048 --> 01:14:28,674
No.

1928
01:14:28,882 --> 01:14:31,468
But you're all I've got.
Our nanny looks
like Benicio Del Toro.

1929
01:14:31,760 --> 01:14:32,719
Oh, you're here.

1930
01:14:32,928 --> 01:14:35,097
Remember to call
my mom to rate me!

1931
01:14:39,643 --> 01:14:40,769
Lane, you remember Paris.

1932
01:14:40,978 --> 01:14:42,354
- I do. Hi.
- Hi.

1933
01:14:42,563 --> 01:14:43,897
Um, do you still
need your boxes?

1934
01:14:44,106 --> 01:14:45,107
Yes, definitely.

1935
01:14:46,358 --> 01:14:48,110
<i>Oh, Kirk, come on!</i>

1936
01:14:49,111 --> 01:14:50,529
I had Zach pull
them out for you.

1937
01:14:50,821 --> 01:14:51,488
You're welcome.

1938
01:14:51,697 --> 01:14:52,573
Thanks, Zach.

1939
01:14:52,781 --> 01:14:53,907
Don't look at me.
I'm not me.

1940
01:14:54,116 --> 01:14:54,825
Uh, what are you
trying to find?

1941
01:14:55,117 --> 01:14:56,160
My lucky outfit.

1942
01:14:56,368 --> 01:14:57,453
What is it, like,
a cheerleader uniform?

1943
01:14:57,661 --> 01:14:58,871
Yes, exactly
like that.

1944
01:14:59,079 --> 01:15:00,330
- Is this your house?
- Yep.

1945
01:15:00,539 --> 01:15:01,915
- Who gets it
when you split?
- What?

1946
01:15:02,124 --> 01:15:03,834
- Lane, is he him yet?
<i>- No!</i>

1947
01:15:04,042 --> 01:15:05,502
Hey, Rory, are you
staying in the spare
room tonight?

1948
01:15:05,711 --> 01:15:06,545
No, it's all yours, Brian.

1949
01:15:06,753 --> 01:15:07,838
Did you get any more beer?

1950
01:15:08,088 --> 01:15:08,881
<i>Yeah, there
should be some in there.</i>

1951
01:15:09,089 --> 01:15:10,257
Uh, can I help?

1952
01:15:10,466 --> 01:15:11,758
Um, yeah. Maybe
look through this box.

1953
01:15:11,967 --> 01:15:13,594
I'm looking for
a red dress, full skirt.

1954
01:15:13,802 --> 01:15:16,930
Okay, red dress, full skirt.
Oh, this is nice. Wear this.

1955
01:15:17,139 --> 01:15:18,474
No, it has to be
my lucky outfit.

1956
01:15:18,682 --> 01:15:20,058
<i>My Conde Nast
meeting is in two days</i>

1957
01:15:20,267 --> 01:15:21,685
<i>and I have to
find that outfit.</i>

1958
01:15:21,894 --> 01:15:23,896
- Is he him yet?
<i>- No, he's not!</i>

1959
01:15:24,104 --> 01:15:26,523
I didn't ask for
this promotion, okay?
Back off.

1960
01:15:26,815 --> 01:15:28,901
There's nothing wrong with
bringing home the bacon, man.

1961
01:15:29,109 --> 01:15:30,486
Well, it's not in here.

1962
01:15:30,694 --> 01:15:32,362
Okay. I'm me.

1963
01:15:32,863 --> 01:15:35,365
Steve! Kwan! Come in here!

1964
01:15:35,574 --> 01:15:37,493
Help your Aunt
Rory find her outfit.

1965
01:15:37,701 --> 01:15:39,077
- Who did your work?
- What?

1966
01:15:39,286 --> 01:15:40,996
Them. Friedman?
I...

1967
01:15:41,205 --> 01:15:42,372
Rasouli?
Mendelssohn?

1968
01:15:42,581 --> 01:15:43,582
I just had them.

1969
01:15:43,790 --> 01:15:44,708
Fine. Don't tell me.

1970
01:15:47,419 --> 01:15:48,170
Hey.

1971
01:15:48,378 --> 01:15:50,589
<i>To
answer your 43,000
frantic voice mails,</i>

1972
01:15:50,797 --> 01:15:52,424
<i>no, you do not have anything
at the dry cleaners.</i>

1973
01:15:52,633 --> 01:15:53,258
Rats.

1974
01:15:53,467 --> 01:15:55,385
Seriously,
it was Kopelson, right?

1975
01:15:55,594 --> 01:15:58,013
Well, it wasn't natural.
Your husband's junk
isn't symmetrical.

1976
01:15:58,263 --> 01:15:59,640
Wait, what?

1977
01:16:00,516 --> 01:16:02,851
It's not here.
Maybe it's at Grandma's.

1978
01:16:03,060 --> 01:16:04,645
- How was London?
<i>- Great.</i>

1979
01:16:04,895 --> 01:16:05,771
Where'd you stay?

1980
01:16:05,979 --> 01:16:07,189
With Didi. Same as always.

1981
01:16:07,397 --> 01:16:08,941
I love that you have
a friend named Didi.

1982
01:16:09,149 --> 01:16:10,943
Makes you sound
so Fridays on ABC.

1983
01:16:11,151 --> 01:16:12,486
Hey, have you spoken
to Grandma lately?

1984
01:16:12,694 --> 01:16:14,571
Why?

1985
01:16:14,821 --> 01:16:16,823
It's been mighty quiet over
there regarding the blowup.

1986
01:16:17,032 --> 01:16:18,575
- I've been busy.
<i>- You should call her.</i>

1987
01:16:18,784 --> 01:16:19,952
De-ice this situation.

1988
01:16:20,160 --> 01:16:20,869
<i>I will.</i>

1989
01:16:21,078 --> 01:16:22,704
- When?
- When it feels right.

1990
01:16:22,913 --> 01:16:24,122
You are both being stubborn.

1991
01:16:24,331 --> 01:16:25,457
Well, she started it.

1992
01:16:25,666 --> 01:16:27,751
Yeah, but aren't we supposed
to cut her all sorts
of slack right now?

1993
01:16:27,960 --> 01:16:29,253
I mean, she lost her husband.

1994
01:16:29,628 --> 01:16:31,880
Did you ever imagine a time
where there'd be a Grandma
without a Grandpa?

1995
01:16:32,923 --> 01:16:33,715
No.

1996
01:16:33,966 --> 01:16:35,092
<i>Check on her.</i>

1997
01:16:35,300 --> 01:16:36,552
Fine. I'll check on her.

1998
01:16:36,760 --> 01:16:38,971
Good. And maybe
while you're there,
you can find my outfit.

1999
01:16:39,179 --> 01:16:41,598
Wow, the student
surpasses the master.

2000
01:16:43,559 --> 01:16:44,893
Great.

2001
01:16:45,644 --> 01:16:46,395
<i>What?</i>

2002
01:16:46,645 --> 01:16:48,522
My Conde Nast
meeting got pushed again.

2003
01:16:48,730 --> 01:16:52,317
Aw, sorry, hon.
So you don't need
that outfit after all?

2004
01:16:52,526 --> 01:16:54,278
You're going.

2005
01:16:55,988 --> 01:16:57,364
- Oh, man.
- What now?

2006
01:16:57,573 --> 01:16:58,782
Poor Paul.

2007
01:16:58,991 --> 01:17:00,242
Hey, you have got to--

2008
01:17:00,450 --> 01:17:01,660
I know, I know.

2009
01:17:06,331 --> 01:17:08,333
All right,
let's do this.
<i>Yes!</i>

2010
01:17:08,625 --> 01:17:10,460
So, are they serious?

2011
01:17:10,669 --> 01:17:11,628
One, two!

2012
01:17:22,514 --> 01:17:27,644
<i>♪ Pretty soon now
You know I'm gonna
make a comeback</i>

2013
01:17:27,853 --> 01:17:30,314
<i>♪ And like
the birds and the bees
In the trees</i>

2014
01:17:30,522 --> 01:17:32,733
<i>♪ It's a sure-fire smash</i>

2015
01:17:33,984 --> 01:17:39,031
<i>♪ I'll speak
To the masses
through the media</i>

2016
01:17:39,239 --> 01:17:41,116
<i>♪ But if you got
anything to say to me</i>

2017
01:17:41,325 --> 01:17:43,452
<i>♪ You better say it with cash</i>

2018
01:17:44,703 --> 01:17:47,623
<i>♪ 'Cause I've got the trash
And you got the cash</i>

2019
01:17:47,831 --> 01:17:50,208
<i>♪ Baby, we should
get along fine</i>

2020
01:17:50,417 --> 01:17:53,128
<i>♪ So give me all your money
You know I think I'm funny</i>

2021
01:17:53,378 --> 01:17:56,298
<i>♪ Can't you see me smiling?
Can't you see me laugh
I'm the man</i>

2022
01:17:56,506 --> 01:17:58,342
<i>♪ I'm the man,
I'm the man, I'm the man</i>

2023
01:17:58,634 --> 01:17:59,509
<i>♪ I'm the man</i>

2024
01:17:59,676 --> 01:18:01,136
<i>♪ That gave you
the hula hoop
♪ I'm the man</i>

2025
01:18:01,345 --> 01:18:02,220
<i>♪ I'm the man</i>

2026
01:18:02,429 --> 01:18:04,264
<i>♪ I'm the man,
I'm the man, I'm the man</i>

2027
01:18:04,473 --> 01:18:06,683
<i>♪ I'm the man that
gave you the yo-yo</i>

2028
01:18:08,060 --> 01:18:09,019
<i>♪ I'm the man</i>

2029
01:18:09,227 --> 01:18:10,896
<i>♪ I'm the man,
I'm the man, I'm the man</i>

2030
01:18:11,104 --> 01:18:11,897
<i>♪ I'm the man</i>

2031
01:18:12,105 --> 01:18:13,732
<i>♪ I'm the man,
I'm the man, I'm the man</i>

2032
01:18:13,940 --> 01:18:15,317
<i>♪ I'm the man, yeah</i>

2033
01:18:15,525 --> 01:18:16,652
<i>♪ I'm the man,
I'm the man, I'm the man ♪</i>

2034
01:18:23,950 --> 01:18:24,868
Mom?

2035
01:18:25,118 --> 01:18:26,453
<i>Hola,</i> hello.

2036
01:18:29,456 --> 01:18:30,415
Uh...

2037
01:18:37,631 --> 01:18:38,757
Mom!

2038
01:18:43,637 --> 01:18:45,472
<i>All right,
take that box
and put it downstairs.</i>

2039
01:18:45,681 --> 01:18:47,432
<i>Then come back up here
and get these presents,
all right?</i>

2040
01:18:47,641 --> 01:18:48,642
Mom, are you here?

2041
01:18:48,850 --> 01:18:50,811
Lorelai? I didn't
know you were coming over.

2042
01:18:51,019 --> 01:18:52,688
Holy shit!

2043
01:18:52,896 --> 01:18:55,774
Berta, these boxes
need to go outside.

2044
01:18:55,982 --> 01:18:56,775
What? What? What?

2045
01:18:57,067 --> 01:18:57,818
<i>They go outside.</i>

2046
01:18:58,026 --> 01:19:00,237
Take the boxes.
Oh, good.

2047
01:19:00,445 --> 01:19:01,947
- Did you call?
- Did I?

2048
01:19:02,155 --> 01:19:03,824
Because today is
a very bad day.

2049
01:19:04,032 --> 01:19:05,992
Mom, what on earth
is going on? Who are
all these people?

2050
01:19:06,201 --> 01:19:08,036
Well, that's Berta.

2051
01:19:08,245 --> 01:19:09,037
I know Berta.

2052
01:19:09,246 --> 01:19:10,872
And that's Berta's husband.

2053
01:19:11,081 --> 01:19:13,041
No, that's Berta's husband,
that's his brother,

2054
01:19:13,250 --> 01:19:15,293
and I think those
are someone's parents.

2055
01:19:15,502 --> 01:19:16,586
And the kids?

2056
01:19:16,837 --> 01:19:19,047
Well, I thought they
were all hers, but now
I'm not so sure.

2057
01:19:19,256 --> 01:19:20,590
No, this goes.

2058
01:19:20,799 --> 01:19:23,927
Mom... What...
Can we get a minute?

2059
01:19:24,136 --> 01:19:28,056
Fine.
Uh, could you all
give us a minute alone?

2060
01:19:28,265 --> 01:19:29,891
Mom, "alone" looks
a lot like gas.

2061
01:19:30,142 --> 01:19:32,185
Well, I don't
know how else to
communicate with them.

2062
01:19:32,394 --> 01:19:35,147
Leonard Marlin's
daughter works at the UN,
and I had her come over.

2063
01:19:35,439 --> 01:19:37,190
She can't figure out
what language they're
speaking, either.

2064
01:19:37,399 --> 01:19:39,151
Mom, what is going on here?

2065
01:19:39,359 --> 01:19:40,402
You mean with the house?

2066
01:19:40,610 --> 01:19:41,403
Uh, sure, start
with the house.

2067
01:19:41,611 --> 01:19:43,488
I'm decluttering my life.

2068
01:19:43,780 --> 01:19:45,115
- You know Marie Kondo?
- No.

2069
01:19:45,407 --> 01:19:46,408
- You don't?
- No.

2070
01:19:46,616 --> 01:19:48,118
- She's Japanese.
- Okay.

2071
01:19:48,368 --> 01:19:49,745
- You still don't know her?
- She's Japanese?

2072
01:19:49,953 --> 01:19:50,954
<i>- Yes.</i>
- No.

2073
01:19:51,163 --> 01:19:54,541
Well, she wrote a best-selling
book on decluttering.
So, I'm decluttering.

2074
01:19:54,750 --> 01:19:56,293
<i>I was starting to
feel claustrophobic here.</i>

2075
01:19:56,501 --> 01:19:57,919
You know, I'd wake up in
the middle of the night

2076
01:19:58,170 --> 01:19:59,796
feeling like this house
was closing in on me.

2077
01:20:00,005 --> 01:20:01,173
Like I couldn't breathe,
you know?

2078
01:20:01,381 --> 01:20:02,549
Oh, yes, I know.

2079
01:20:02,758 --> 01:20:05,135
So one of the ladies
in my garden club
had bought this book,

2080
01:20:05,427 --> 01:20:07,554
<i>The Life-Changing
Magic of Tidying Up.</i>

2081
01:20:07,763 --> 01:20:10,640
She said it made
everything better.
Are you paying attention?

2082
01:20:10,849 --> 01:20:12,476
<i>The Life-Changing
Magic of Tidying Up?</i>

2083
01:20:12,684 --> 01:20:15,145
- You know it?
- Was it written by that
Japanese woman, Marie Kondo?

2084
01:20:15,437 --> 01:20:16,313
- Yes.
- No.

2085
01:20:16,521 --> 01:20:17,939
Well, people swear by her.

2086
01:20:18,148 --> 01:20:20,150
She tells you you have to
take everything you own out

2087
01:20:20,442 --> 01:20:22,319
and put it in
piles on the ground.

2088
01:20:22,527 --> 01:20:25,530
Then you pick up
each possession
and you hold it.

2089
01:20:25,739 --> 01:20:27,449
If it brings you joy,
you keep it,

2090
01:20:27,657 --> 01:20:29,409
and if it doesn't,
out it goes.

2091
01:20:31,036 --> 01:20:32,078
No joy.

2092
01:20:32,662 --> 01:20:34,247
Mom, he's taking
the dining room chairs.

2093
01:20:34,456 --> 01:20:35,707
They don't bring me joy.

2094
01:20:35,916 --> 01:20:38,502
This box needs to be taped.

2095
01:20:39,669 --> 01:20:41,671
Oh, by the way,
if I get a terminal disease,

2096
01:20:41,922 --> 01:20:44,841
I want to move to
Washington State to die.
They let you do that there.

2097
01:20:45,050 --> 01:20:46,301
Die? They let you die?

2098
01:20:46,510 --> 01:20:48,720
With dignity and in
your own time frame.

2099
01:20:48,929 --> 01:20:50,472
I'll die there
and then you need

2100
01:20:50,680 --> 01:20:52,140
to ship me back
here for burial,

2101
01:20:52,349 --> 01:20:54,810
which costs a fortune,
I found out.

2102
01:20:55,018 --> 01:20:59,231
So, in the safe
there's an envelope
labeled "body-shipping cash."

2103
01:20:59,439 --> 01:21:00,899
<i>I could also go to Vermont,</i>

2104
01:21:01,107 --> 01:21:03,735
<i>but we vacationed there once
and it was terrible.</i>

2105
01:21:03,944 --> 01:21:04,820
<i>Squirrels.</i>

2106
01:21:05,028 --> 01:21:07,239
<i>So, Washington it is.</i>

2107
01:21:08,615 --> 01:21:09,699
It's the middle of the day.

2108
01:21:09,908 --> 01:21:11,827
Taste it.
See if it brings you joy.

2109
01:21:13,620 --> 01:21:16,873
Oh, God.
I haven't sat
down in six hours.

2110
01:21:17,165 --> 01:21:18,166
Cheers.

2111
01:21:22,879 --> 01:21:24,798
So, come on,
Mom, talk to me.

2112
01:21:25,674 --> 01:21:27,843
Why are
you wearing jeans?

2113
01:21:28,051 --> 01:21:30,428
- What?
- Because it's terrifying.

2114
01:21:30,637 --> 01:21:32,514
I started this
process with my closet.

2115
01:21:32,722 --> 01:21:35,267
And nothing I owned
brought me joy,
so I ran out of clothes.

2116
01:21:35,559 --> 01:21:36,560
I don't even know
where I got these.

2117
01:21:36,768 --> 01:21:38,728
- They're mine.
- They are?

2118
01:21:38,937 --> 01:21:41,147
Did you not notice
the Billy Squier
patch on the butt?

2119
01:21:41,356 --> 01:21:42,816
Well, you can have them
back when I'm done.

2120
01:21:43,024 --> 01:21:44,442
I have not been
pining for them.

2121
01:21:44,651 --> 01:21:46,695
I have to get back to work.
Kitchen's next.

2122
01:21:46,945 --> 01:21:48,738
Mom, stop.
You're not gonna
have anything left.

2123
01:21:48,947 --> 01:21:51,575
That's okay.
What I do have
will bring me joy.

2124
01:21:51,783 --> 01:21:52,701
Mom...

2125
01:21:54,202 --> 01:21:56,329
Nothing is gonna
bring you joy right now.

2126
01:21:56,538 --> 01:21:59,374
<i>Nothing.
Your husband just died.</i>

2127
01:21:59,583 --> 01:22:00,625
When some time has passed

2128
01:22:00,834 --> 01:22:03,587
and you realize that you've
given away all of your
carefully chosen stuff,

2129
01:22:03,879 --> 01:22:05,672
you're going to track down
Marie Kondo and kill her.

2130
01:22:05,881 --> 01:22:07,966
And then you're gonna go
to jail wearing those jeans,

2131
01:22:08,174 --> 01:22:09,718
and the Winchester
Mystery Family

2132
01:22:09,926 --> 01:22:11,511
will be living here
in your ball gowns.

2133
01:22:13,221 --> 01:22:14,639
I don't know how to do this.

2134
01:22:14,848 --> 01:22:16,892
- Do what?
- Live my life.

2135
01:22:17,183 --> 01:22:19,603
- Oh, Mom...
- I don't know what
to do or where to go.

2136
01:22:19,811 --> 01:22:22,188
I've forgotten
which side of
the bed to sleep on.

2137
01:22:22,397 --> 01:22:24,357
<i>I was married for 50 years.</i>

2138
01:22:24,566 --> 01:22:25,942
Half of me is gone.

2139
01:22:27,193 --> 01:22:28,445
Ah, you don't understand.

2140
01:22:28,695 --> 01:22:29,571
I understand.

2141
01:22:29,779 --> 01:22:31,281
You can't understand.
You're not married.

2142
01:22:31,489 --> 01:22:32,741
Luke and I are as
good as married.

2143
01:22:32,949 --> 01:22:34,492
No, you're not,
you're roommates.

2144
01:22:34,701 --> 01:22:36,453
<i>And someday you'll just go off
and find another roommate.</i>

2145
01:22:36,661 --> 01:22:39,706
I had a real partner
for 50 years,
and now I'm alone.

2146
01:22:43,710 --> 01:22:45,545
Are you still going
to that grief group
you told me about?

2147
01:22:45,754 --> 01:22:46,630
Oh, God, no.

2148
01:22:47,130 --> 01:22:47,923
Why not?

2149
01:22:48,131 --> 01:22:49,966
All those women
with red noses
and Skechers.

2150
01:22:50,216 --> 01:22:51,718
All they do is sit
around and complain.

2151
01:22:51,968 --> 01:22:53,428
What an annoying
grief group.

2152
01:22:53,637 --> 01:22:56,556
And of course, when it's
my turn, there's no time
left to talk about me.

2153
01:22:56,765 --> 01:22:58,934
- Right.
- I have problems.
I can't help them.

2154
01:22:59,142 --> 01:23:02,354
Well, what about seeing
someone one-on-one?

2155
01:23:02,562 --> 01:23:04,606
- What do you mean?
- You know,
just you and them.

2156
01:23:04,814 --> 01:23:06,316
- Who?
- Just a person.

2157
01:23:06,524 --> 01:23:08,276
<i>- What kind of person?</i>
- Just a normal person

2158
01:23:08,485 --> 01:23:10,987
with an office and
a prescription pad.

2159
01:23:11,196 --> 01:23:13,073
- You mean a psychiatrist.
- That could work too.

2160
01:23:13,281 --> 01:23:14,449
You want me to go to therapy.

2161
01:23:14,658 --> 01:23:16,242
Just for a while till you
get back on your feet.

2162
01:23:16,451 --> 01:23:18,912
I knew it. You have
been trying to get me
into a therapist's office

2163
01:23:19,120 --> 01:23:20,872
ever since you saw
that Tony Soprano show.

2164
01:23:21,081 --> 01:23:22,832
Oh, I have not.
He did make it look
cool though, right?

2165
01:23:23,041 --> 01:23:23,708
No.

2166
01:23:23,917 --> 01:23:25,001
<i>What's the big deal?</i>

2167
01:23:25,210 --> 01:23:26,586
I'm not crazy.

2168
01:23:26,795 --> 01:23:29,506
No. You're in pain.
This is uncharted territory.

2169
01:23:29,714 --> 01:23:31,216
<i>If it might help,
what's the harm?</i>

2170
01:23:33,134 --> 01:23:34,135
I'll think about it.

2171
01:23:34,344 --> 01:23:35,845
Okay. But really consider it.

2172
01:23:36,721 --> 01:23:37,472
I will.

2173
01:23:37,681 --> 01:23:38,890
And if you do it, commit.

2174
01:23:39,099 --> 01:23:40,141
You know, really go for it.

2175
01:23:40,392 --> 01:23:41,977
- I will.
- Jump in with both feet.

2176
01:23:42,185 --> 01:23:44,813
Five, six days a week.
Really Woody Allen
the hell out of it.

2177
01:23:45,063 --> 01:23:47,232
- I got it.
- 'Cause he's
totally normal now.

2178
01:23:47,440 --> 01:23:48,858
I promise, Lorelai.

2179
01:23:52,320 --> 01:23:54,197
I'd better try to get
my bedroom set back.

2180
01:23:54,864 --> 01:23:57,117
Okay, but first,
don't you think
you want to...

2181
01:23:57,951 --> 01:23:58,618
What?

2182
01:24:00,161 --> 01:24:01,830
Oh, God, yes.

2183
01:24:18,638 --> 01:24:20,181
<i>♪ Hey, sweet Annie</i>

2184
01:24:20,432 --> 01:24:22,350
<i>♪ Don't take it so bad</i>

2185
01:24:23,560 --> 01:24:27,522
<i>♪ You know
the summer's coming soon</i>

2186
01:24:28,231 --> 01:24:33,111
<i>♪ Though
the interstate is choking
under salty, dirty sand</i>

2187
01:24:33,319 --> 01:24:37,657
<i>♪ And it seems the sun
Is hiding from the moon</i>

2188
01:24:38,283 --> 01:24:43,246
<i>♪ The snow is coming down
on our New England town</i>

2189
01:24:43,455 --> 01:24:47,292
<i>♪ And it's been
falling all day long... ♪</i>

2190
01:24:48,376 --> 01:24:49,669
<i>Oy! Danesy-boy!</i>

2191
01:24:49,878 --> 01:24:53,214
So dressing up of the dog
extends to outside
of the house now, huh?

2192
01:24:53,465 --> 01:24:55,717
Oh, no, no. He wanted
to go public. It's a whole
new world out there.

2193
01:24:55,925 --> 01:24:56,760
Uh-huh.

2194
01:24:56,968 --> 01:24:58,928
I can only support
with love, not judgment.

2195
01:24:59,137 --> 01:25:00,638
- So that's me.
- Yeah.

2196
01:25:00,847 --> 01:25:01,765
And that's...

2197
01:25:01,973 --> 01:25:03,141
It's his order pad
and pencil.

2198
01:25:03,349 --> 01:25:04,893
Sure, sure.
And the baseball cap?

2199
01:25:05,101 --> 01:25:06,561
Oh, his head's too big.
None of yours would fit.

2200
01:25:06,770 --> 01:25:07,937
Oh, okay.
Let's get a drink.

2201
01:25:08,146 --> 01:25:09,147
Okay.

2202
01:25:09,355 --> 01:25:10,398
My man!

2203
01:25:12,150 --> 01:25:13,651
- Wow. Do I want to
know what that's--
- No.

2204
01:25:13,985 --> 01:25:14,944
No, you don't.

2205
01:25:15,153 --> 01:25:16,571
Okay. Oh.

2206
01:25:16,780 --> 01:25:17,947
What?

2207
01:25:18,156 --> 01:25:19,157
Uh, nothing.

2208
01:25:19,365 --> 01:25:20,241
What's up?

2209
01:25:20,492 --> 01:25:21,910
It's just Paris

2210
01:25:22,160 --> 01:25:23,953
sending me
pictures of potential,
you know...

2211
01:25:24,162 --> 01:25:25,955
She's tall.
You want to start
a basketball team?

2212
01:25:26,164 --> 01:25:28,083
Uh, didn't you say
we're not doing that?

2213
01:25:28,291 --> 01:25:30,502
Oh, I e-mailed her
that we're tabling it.

2214
01:25:30,794 --> 01:25:31,920
- Tabling it?
- Back-burnering it?

2215
01:25:32,170 --> 01:25:33,213
Just tell her no.

2216
01:25:33,421 --> 01:25:34,589
- That's what tabling means.
- No.

2217
01:25:34,798 --> 01:25:37,383
That means you're
gonna do it eventually.
Are we doing it eventually?

2218
01:25:37,592 --> 01:25:39,302
- No. You said no.
- And you said no.

2219
01:25:39,511 --> 01:25:41,012
We both said no.

2220
01:25:42,680 --> 01:25:43,431
So...

2221
01:25:47,227 --> 01:25:49,771
Don't need a surrogate.

2222
01:25:49,979 --> 01:25:52,065
Done. Let's get that drink.

2223
01:25:52,565 --> 01:25:53,566
Okay.

2224
01:25:54,442 --> 01:25:56,277
Two big gloggs.

2225
01:25:56,486 --> 01:25:58,696
Hey, Kirk.
You taking the day
off of Ooo-bering?

2226
01:25:59,030 --> 01:26:00,115
I don't know what
you're talking about.

2227
01:26:00,323 --> 01:26:01,533
You know, Ooo-ber.

2228
01:26:01,741 --> 01:26:03,284
- No.
- Kirk, Ooo--

2229
01:26:03,493 --> 01:26:04,619
Stop making that noise.

2230
01:26:04,828 --> 01:26:06,788
And if anyone
from the wonderful
Uber corporation

2231
01:26:06,996 --> 01:26:09,040
or their very handsome
attorneys contacts you,

2232
01:26:09,249 --> 01:26:10,917
please tell them
it was my brother

2233
01:26:11,126 --> 01:26:13,253
and not me,
who recklessly violated

2234
01:26:13,461 --> 01:26:15,171
trademark laws and
perpetrated fraud.

2235
01:26:15,839 --> 01:26:18,466
Dirk has always
been a disappointment
to the family.

2236
01:26:19,217 --> 01:26:19,926
Your gloggs.

2237
01:26:20,135 --> 01:26:21,052
- Kirk--
- Next!

2238
01:26:21,261 --> 01:26:23,847
Okay. Your car is done.

2239
01:26:24,139 --> 01:26:25,807
I do not guarantee
it will make it home,

2240
01:26:26,015 --> 01:26:27,600
or even out of
the gas station.

2241
01:26:27,809 --> 01:26:29,269
I bet it will.

2242
01:26:29,477 --> 01:26:31,563
Come get it now.
It's idling. I'm afraid
to turn it off.

2243
01:26:31,771 --> 01:26:33,314
Okay, we'll be
right there. Love you.

2244
01:26:33,523 --> 01:26:34,649
Buy a new car.

2245
01:26:34,858 --> 01:26:35,567
Where's Paul Anka?

2246
01:26:35,775 --> 01:26:37,026
Aw, he's off
chasing ice skaters.

2247
01:26:37,277 --> 01:26:39,362
Oh, boy. Hi, Mom.

2248
01:26:39,571 --> 01:26:41,656
- You answered.
You never answer.
<i>- I did.</i>

2249
01:26:41,906 --> 01:26:43,700
- Sure I do.
<i>- Are you drunk?</i>

2250
01:26:43,950 --> 01:26:45,160
Mom, what can I help you with?

2251
01:26:45,326 --> 01:26:47,579
I just wanted you to know
that I took your advice.

2252
01:26:47,787 --> 01:26:48,663
Are you drunk?

2253
01:26:48,913 --> 01:26:49,914
<i>I found a therapist.</i>

2254
01:26:50,123 --> 01:26:52,876
- You're kidding.
- Linda, in my garden club,
is bipolar,

2255
01:26:53,084 --> 01:26:55,044
so I asked her if she had
someone she could recommend.

2256
01:26:55,253 --> 01:26:56,254
<i>Good thinking.</i>

2257
01:26:56,462 --> 01:26:57,422
She's a lovely woman.

2258
01:26:57,630 --> 01:26:59,090
- Linda?
<i>- No. The therapist.</i>

2259
01:26:59,299 --> 01:27:01,551
Linda's a nightmare.
She cries if the tea is cold.

2260
01:27:01,759 --> 01:27:05,555
But the therapist
is wonderful.
Very tasteful office.

2261
01:27:05,847 --> 01:27:07,265
She burns a candle
that smells so delicious,

2262
01:27:07,557 --> 01:27:08,516
I bought one to have at home.

2263
01:27:08,725 --> 01:27:09,851
Sounds great.

2264
01:27:10,059 --> 01:27:11,728
<i>- I could get one for you.</i>
- Sure.

2265
01:27:11,936 --> 01:27:15,064
I go there once
a week and we just talk.
Talk about anything.

2266
01:27:15,273 --> 01:27:17,192
Or nothing if
there's nothing on my mind.

2267
01:27:17,400 --> 01:27:18,401
Sounds great, Mom.

2268
01:27:18,568 --> 01:27:20,445
She told me to get rid
of the Marie Kondo book.

2269
01:27:20,778 --> 01:27:22,780
I like her already.
Hey, I did something right.

2270
01:27:22,989 --> 01:27:23,948
Law of averages.

2271
01:27:24,157 --> 01:27:26,534
I went out and I bought
a little notebook,
so I can write down

2272
01:27:26,743 --> 01:27:27,744
things I want to
discuss with her.

2273
01:27:27,952 --> 01:27:29,120
That way I won't forget.

2274
01:27:29,329 --> 01:27:30,330
Very sensible.

2275
01:27:30,538 --> 01:27:32,665
And I told her it was your
idea that I come to see her.

2276
01:27:32,874 --> 01:27:33,875
You did?

2277
01:27:34,167 --> 01:27:36,586
<i>I did.
Thank you, Lorelai.</i>

2278
01:27:36,794 --> 01:27:39,881
<i>Thank you for suggesting it.
I think it's exactly
what I needed.</i>

2279
01:27:40,089 --> 01:27:43,301
Wow, I'm so glad, Mom. Really.

2280
01:27:43,509 --> 01:27:44,886
I'd love for you to
meet her sometime.

2281
01:27:45,094 --> 01:27:45,970
Sure.

2282
01:27:46,179 --> 01:27:48,181
Maybe next time I go,
you could come by and say hi.

2283
01:27:48,389 --> 01:27:51,017
Oh, Mom, I would love
to meet your therapist.

2284
01:27:51,226 --> 01:27:55,063
<i>Really? Great.
I go on Tuesday at 3:00.</i>

2285
01:27:55,313 --> 01:27:56,648
Tuesday's probably fine.

2286
01:27:56,856 --> 01:27:58,775
<i>Wonderful!
Oh, you're going to love her.</i>

2287
01:27:59,025 --> 01:28:00,068
I'll text you the address?

2288
01:28:00,276 --> 01:28:01,277
Text away.

2289
01:28:01,527 --> 01:28:03,988
<i>- See you then.</i>
- See you then, Mom. Bye.

2290
01:28:05,657 --> 01:28:06,783
What sort of
attack are you having?

2291
01:28:06,991 --> 01:28:08,534
What is wrong with you?
Are you crazy?

2292
01:28:08,743 --> 01:28:10,286
- Why?
- You're going to
therapy with your mother!

2293
01:28:10,536 --> 01:28:11,955
- No, I'm not.
- Yes, you are.

2294
01:28:12,163 --> 01:28:13,456
No, she just wants
me to meet her.

2295
01:28:13,665 --> 01:28:15,083
What do you think that means?

2296
01:28:15,291 --> 01:28:16,751
Luke, look.

2297
01:28:16,960 --> 01:28:19,921
My mother took my advice.
Do you understand
what I'm saying?

2298
01:28:20,129 --> 01:28:21,923
The advice that I gave her,
she took it.

2299
01:28:22,131 --> 01:28:24,425
That's never
happened before. Ever.

2300
01:28:24,634 --> 01:28:27,887
And she's feeling good about
it and she just wanted me
to come down and meet her...

2301
01:28:28,096 --> 01:28:29,973
Oh, crap!
I'm going to
therapy with my mother!

2302
01:28:36,062 --> 01:28:39,857
- Oh, boy.
- Come on.

2303
01:28:40,066 --> 01:28:44,445
♪ <i>Just when I've begun
to get myself together</i>

2304
01:28:44,654 --> 01:28:46,781
<i>♪ You waltz right in the door</i>

2305
01:28:47,031 --> 01:28:49,200
<i>♪ Just like you've done before</i>

2306
01:28:49,409 --> 01:28:54,664
<i>♪ And wrap my heart
'round your little finger</i>

2307
01:28:54,872 --> 01:28:56,791
<i>♪ Here you come again</i>

2308
01:28:58,710 --> 01:29:03,298
<i>♪ Just when I'm about
to make it work without you</i>

2309
01:29:03,506 --> 01:29:05,633
<i>♪ You look into my eyes</i>

2310
01:29:05,925 --> 01:29:07,844
<i>♪ And lie those pretty lies</i>

2311
01:29:08,052 --> 01:29:12,724
<i>♪ And pretty soon
I'm wonderin' how
I came to doubt you</i>

2312
01:29:12,932 --> 01:29:17,020
<i>♪ All you got to do
is smile that smile</i>

2313
01:29:17,228 --> 01:29:21,357
<i>♪ And there go all my defenses</i>

2314
01:29:21,566 --> 01:29:26,195
<i>♪ Just leave it up to you
and in a little while</i>

2315
01:29:26,404 --> 01:29:31,534
<i>♪ You're messin' up my mind
and fillin' up my senses</i>

2316
01:29:31,743 --> 01:29:34,454
<i>♪ Here you come again</i>

2317
01:29:35,413 --> 01:29:39,834
<i>♪ Lookin' better
than a body has a right to</i>

2318
01:29:40,043 --> 01:29:44,422
<i>♪ And shakin' me up
so that all I really know</i>

2319
01:29:44,630 --> 01:29:46,716
<i>♪ Is here you come again</i>

2320
01:29:48,051 --> 01:29:50,011
<i>♪ And here I go</i>

2321
01:30:07,236 --> 01:30:11,699
<i>♪ All you gotta do
is smile that smile</i>

2322
01:30:11,908 --> 01:30:15,203
<i>♪ And there go
all my defenses ♪</i>