Maybe we should all sit, like,
Japanese-style on the floor
or something because all of
our chairs are really uneven,
and I just don't want it
to give, like,
a weird balance/
eye-contact thing.
Yuck.
Hey, this still doesn't taste
like Mom's.
Well, that's really
frustrating feedback, Drew.
I mean, what is it missing,
you know?
I'm sorry.
I just really don't want
to do this, Dory.
[ Sniffs ]
Okay.
Babe, this is part
of our new thing, right --
trying new things?
But I think it's nice, you know,
we're having somebody new over.
No, no, no, no, don't try
to trick me, Dory, okay?
Why does it have
to be Gavin?
Why can't it just be one
of my business-school buddies
or someone fun?
Because he's a nice guy
and he's going
through a really hard time.
Actually,
he's an unstable maniac
who's going
through a hard time.
Drew.
He knows something, okay?
So let's just put on a smile,
and let's get it out of him.
"Get it out of him"?
What is going on with --
I need --
I need to get the wine.
"Get the wi"--
[ Sighs ]
Can you hurry back,
okay?
I don't want
to be sitting in awkward tension
asking this guy where he got
his clothes or some crap.
It's not like he's gonna
gun us down or something.
I mean, he --
-50 buck says he guns us down.
Gavin.
Hi.
Gavin: I'm sorry.
I'm somewhat early.
I can go back outside
if this makes you uneasy.
No.
No, no, no, no.
Come in.
-A-All right.
Drew, Gavin's here.
Drew: Oh, hey, pal.
Yeah.
Hey, buddy.
What can I get you?
What is this, Drew's
General Store, or something?
[ Light laughter ]
No.
Um, so, I'm just gonna run out
and grab the wine.
Please,
make yourself at home.
I'll be back
in, like, one sec, yeah?
-Okay. Yeah.
-Okay. Okay.
[ Door closes ]
Hey, you didn't hear us talking
in here, did you?
I'm just curious, um,
how thin the walls are.
Why?
Were you talking about me?
[ Laughs ]
No.
♪♪
[ Indistinct conversations ]
[ Grunts ]
Ooh, sorry, sorry, sorry!
Sorry.
So, what kind of porn
do you like?
What's up?
It's just us guys here,
right?
Yeah, honestly,
nothing too nuts.
What kind of porn
do you like?
I'm telling you,
just kind of, uh...normal stuff.
Nothing too nuts.
Just...sex.
See, like, me,
I hate when I see a condom.
Yeah.
I mean, I guess
if I had to say something, um...
I alwa-- I like a little bit
of a story.
Kind of like a beginning,
middle, and end type of stuff.
[ Cellphone rings ]
Hey.
Portia: Dory, I've literally
tried on everything that I own,
and I'm stressed out about it.
And Elliott's not here
to help.
Don't overthink it,
all right?
Just wear
what you wore yesterday.
I just --
I don't want to do this.
How many times have I come
over to your house
'cause you thought
there was an owl in there?
-[ Sighs ]
-Okay, listen to me.
You're the only one
who has amazing social skills.
-[ Laughs ]
-You're the only one
who could get someone
to talk about something
that they don't want
to talk about.
I know.
I'm good at that.
Okay.
I love you.
I'm gonna figure it out.
-Okay.
Love you, too.
See you later. Bye.
[ Cash register beeps ]
Hey.
-Hey.
-Sorry.
[ Door closes ]
There was a line,
but, uh, I got the wine.
Nice.
Wine's cool.
-Yeah.
-Want some freaking wine, Gavin?
"Anything is better
than lies and deceit."
I'm sorry?
A famous quote
from this book.
Oh!
[ Chuckles ]
Where did you, uh...
find this copy, Dory?
Um, I'm not sure.
I've just always had it.
It's like I've had it forever,
I think.
Yeah.
Chantal was, uh, reading
this book
when we broke up.
-Really?
-Yeah.
Same edition, actually.
Did she like it?
[ Book slams ]
I want to talk
about something else.
We'll talk
about something else.
Yeah.
Yeah, maybe
we just take it easy
on the drinking
a little bit, you know?
Mm-hmm.
You don't want to get
all loosey-goosey
like I know
that you can do.
I'm just
than I want to be
right now, okay?
And drinking's
helping that.
Oh, I'm sure
that's really helping it.
Mm-hmm.
Gavin: Hey, I'm gonna play
some music
even though I don't love
any of your records.
Totally cool, bud.
Do whatever you want!
Great. Thank you.
[ Door buzzes ]
Hey, did I tell you
that I hate this?
Portia's here.
[ Door opens ]
Hi.
-Hi.
-Mwah, mwah.
-Mmm!
Oh, it smells so good! Hi!
-Yeah?
-I'm Portia.
-Oh, you guys haven't met?
Uh, well,
I saw you the other night.
At the vigil.
Get on in here.
Um, and I also remember
back in college
seeing you perform in numerous
theatrical productions.
Thank you
for your support.
-Here you go, "Porsh."
-Oh, thanks, babe.
Dory: You want to come
in the kitchen with me?
Okay.
Hey. Hey.
[ Snaps fingers ]
Yeah?
-Okay, come on.
-Yeah?
-Look me in the eyes, okay?
-Okay.
Is this
some kind of a setup?
What?
What do you mean?
Portia, me.
[ Sighing ] Oh.
Is it a set-up?
Um...
Yeah, I guess so.
Um...
yeah, I th--
I think, um...
if you feel something,
act on it.
Okay, um...
I just wanted
to say thank you
for, um --
for coming over tonight.
Um, you know, Drew and I don't
do this very often, so...
-They don't.
-...I hope the food is good.
Anyways, yeah,
and, uh, and Gavin, um,
I'm really looking forward
to, you know, getting
to know you better, so, yeah,
welcome, and, yeah.
-Hey, cheers, guys.
-Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait.
Toasting people, you got
to make direct eye contact,
or else you get seven years
of bad sex, right?
You know
that old superstition.
None of us want that,
especially not
the couple over there, right?
[ Chuckles ]
If I know anything
about couples...
Right. [ Laughs ]
...they like having sex...
Right.
...for years.
Dory:
Okay, Drew.
[ Glasses clink ]
Portia.
[ Glasses clink ]
Drew, you know
the drill.
Right, yeah.
[ Glasses clink ]
Dory.
Yeah.
[ Glasses clink ]
Yeah.
[ Laughs ]
That's so fun.
I never played that.
Gavin:
[ Slurps, clears throat ]
So, uh, where's the other
blonde friend of yours?
-Oh, Elliott.
-Oh, yeah.
He is in Africa having
the time of his life.
I'm gonna show you
a cute pic.
He's doing such good work.
That's him
with his water charity.
Dory:
Uh, Gavin, um...
I wanted
to ask you, um --
What'd you think
about the vigil?
Oh, God, I mean,
Drew knows how I feel.
Yeah.
He had a real strong reaction.
Right.
Yeah, I mean, personally,
I felt like
I just bought tickets
to, like,
a three-ring circus
or something.
Portia:
[ Laughs ]
That's exactly what I said.
That's the --
Yeah?
Drew, tell her.
That's exactly what I said.
Those are
the words I used.
He said the same thing.
Mm.
Yeah, I just felt like
Chantal would have...
hated the whole thing.
-[ Scoffs ]
Do you --
D-Do you disagree?
[ Slurps ]
[ Gulps ]
I neither agree
nor disagree.
Mm.
Mm-hmm.
I think what Dor is trying to
say is that, um,
Chantal is
just such a little...
humble little sweetheart.
Is such a humble
little sweetheart?
That's what I said.
Is that
what we all think here?
That -- That Chantal was just
a little humble sweetie?
Do you both?
-[ Clears throat ]
Sh-- She was very --
very nice to me.
-Mm-hmm.
That's interesting.
Definitely.
Um...
I'm gonna just politely request
that we don't talk
about Chantal anymore.
-Yeah.
-Of course.
-Yeah.
Of course.
Yeah, I just think
it's, you know --
It's such a tragedy,
you know?
I just hope she knows
she's loved.
I just told you that I didn't
want to talk about that!
[ Breathing heavily ]
-Mm-hmm.
-You know?
Yeah.
I'm sorry.
Portia: Okay, you guys.
[ Laughs ]
Crazy that we've gone, like,
this whole supper
without talking about
the political situation
happening in our country.
Mm, yeah, I'm actually
gonna be right back.
Where you going?
Anybody hear that dog?
I got to go check
on that outside.
[ Sighs ]
April: Hey!
Baby dick.
[ Door closes ]
-Hi.
-Having a party?
Oh, um, no, just like
a small, little get-together.
Kind of offended
I wasn't invited.
Yeah, it was my -- It's kind of
my girlfriend's thing,
so I'm not really,
you know --
-[ Laughs ]
-It's just like a --
I'm kidding.
You don't owe me
anything.
Okay.
So, just so you know,
me and my angry boyfriend,
we broke up.
And you were right.
He was a total jerk.
Nice, um...
It seems like that was
a good thing, then.
[ Laughs ]
You don't know
what's good for me, okay?!
Oh, for sure.
Detective Garcia, that's my
character on "Surviving Essex,"
She's Latina,
so she uses her hands a lot.
I -- You're --
You play a Latina?
Oh, yeah,
I'm ethnically ambiguous.
[ Sighing ] Okay.
[ Clears throat ]
[ Sniffs ]
"Gavin, let's be real, okay?"
[ Sniffs ]
"I know about the baby.
Yeah.
I know.
It's crazy.
But I know.
Are you the father?
Gavin, look at me.
Look at me.
What happened to Chantal?"
It's cra-- I've become,
like, paralyzingly aware
of my body at all times
since I've been acting.
It's really, like,
I can't --
I'm like --
Sometimes, I'm just, like --
I can't even get control
over what my feet are doing.
Dory.
'cause I'm always thinking
about them.
-So...
-[ Sighs ]
...what's, like, a weird lie
you guys have told?
-Ooh, fun, a game!
-Yeah? [ Laughs ]
What kind of lie
are you talking about?
Yeah, what kind of lie?
Um, well --
[ Clears throat ]
I-I told my barista once...
-Uh-huh.
...that, um,
my name was Chloe.
My turn. Okay.
Mine's really funny.
Um, when I was in third grade,
I lied,
and I told my teacher
that I was dyslexic
so I wouldn't have to take
any standardized tests,
and she totally
believed me.
[ Laughs ]
And then, actually,
the following year,
in fourth grade,
I was diagnosed as dyslexic.
Oh.
But that's okay.
Um, m-may I, uh,
please, use your restroom?
-But it's your turn!
-Yeah.
-It's --
-Yeah, buddy.
It's, um, just down there
to the left.
-It's right there.
-Jiggle the handle.
You don't have
to jiggle the handle.
Thanks, man.
[ Groans ]
Drunk.
[ Sighs ]
[ Door closes ]
Why won't he loosen
the fuck up
and start talking
some shit, right?
Dory, why would he?
Can we please just drop
this whole thing?
No!
He's scary!
I feel so bad for the guy.
He's such an angry,
sad little psycho.
Can we please stop?
Dory.
That's messed up.
He left his phone.
No, no, no, no. Dory.
Dory, put his phone down.
He left his phone.
Dory, do not do stuff
with his phone.
No. No!
Portia. Portia.
-What?
Make sure he doesn't come
into our bedroom, okay?
What?
We're sitting.
We're sitting. We're sitting.
No, Drew, come.
I need you to sit back down.
Come. Come!
You sit back down!
God damn it.
No!
Dory, stop it!
Stop!
Mother --
Dory.
No, Dory,
I didn't say yes!
Please, give me the phone.
Give me the phone.
Hi!
And then,
there were two, huh?
[ Laughs ]
Brown-haired people are
harder to trust.
[ Slurps ]
I don't like this.
I don't like this!
Stop it!
You're freaking me out.
I'm freaking you out?
[ Sighs ]
Oh, my God.
There are literally, like,
hundreds of e-mails to Chantal.
How do I just, like,
highlight them all
and forward them
all at once?
Dory, for the love of God,
you can't forward
the man's e-mails.
That's illegal.
Yes, I can!
Okay, okay, look, you need to go
into the "Sent" folder, then.
You need to delete those.
Then, you need to go
to the "Trash" folder.
You need to delete those
so that they're gone for good,
or else he's gonna know
that you did this.
I know! I know!
-Hey, um...
-Mm-hmm?
I'm -- I'm, uh, usually not
this forward.
Mm-hmm.
But, um, you know, I can tell
that you're sort of into me,
and I'm really into you,
and, you know, I've had
enough wine that I'm feeling
sort of courageous right now.
Okay.
So, um, could I ask you
if I could kiss you?
Aww.
Would that be acceptable?
That's so sweet...
[ Sighs ]
...and always flattering.
[ Both chuckle ]
But I like
to move slow.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Please --
I totally understand.
Take it real slow.
♪ Right down
to Kokomo ♪
[ Chuckles ]
Hm.
Ooh, you're getting up,
getting to go, going.
Slowly.
[ Chuckles ]
You.
You, you, you, you, you.
Yeah, you, you,
you, you.
-Mm.
[ Cellphone chiming ]
What was that?
[ Chiming continues ]
Is your phone not
on silent?
Oh, my God!
You sent them to my e-mail!
Yeah, because your e-mail's
shorter than mine!
Dory!
Oh, God damn it.
That's so distracting.
Gavin: Hello?
Someone's phone blowing up!
You need to get your ass
out there right now.
I'm not gonna do it.
You think I'm gonna do it...
Yeah, go, go, go.
...go out there
with that psycho?
I had to talk to him
when you went to get the wine!
No, go!
Oh, my God!
[ Chiming continues ]
Hey, buddy.
Ah, sorry about that.
Sometimes, I feel like
the office never closes.
You know
what I'm talking about?
If I could just have
the phone.
Is everything,
uh, okay, man?
Yeah. What?
Um...Wh--
Uh, what are you talking about?
What is -- What?
Winning the fight in there?
You know, you the put
the princess in her place?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah?
Laying into her.
Yeah.
[ Chuckling ] You know
what I'm talking about?
[ Chuckling ] You know,
guy stuff, so...
Yeah.
If I could just, um,
have the phone?
[ Chiming continues ]
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Thanks. Yeah.
Cool.
Oh, yeah, this is --
This is what I thought.
It's uh...office,
office, office --
bunch of office crap.
I am so sorry, you guys.
I suddenly feel so sick...
Oh, no, really?
...and crappy -- Yeah.
I just -- It's my head
and my throat,
and, like,
my T-zone is --
Well, uh...
I feel so bad.
Can I get your number
before you leave?
How about, um,
you give me your number?
Here you go.
Here's my business card.
Oh, great.
Portia, you're leaving?
No -- Why?
I feel so sick.
Oh, that sucks.
Okay.
-Thank you so much.
-Bye, Porsh.
-Bye. Bye.
-Have a good night, Portia.
[ Shudders ]
I don't know.
I don't get women.
They confuse me, you know?
I --
She looked
genuinely sick to me.
God, I hope so.
I j-- [ Sighs ]
[Sighs] I don't know.
Maybe I'm overthinking it.
I don't know.
[ Breathes deeply ]
W-W-Where's my phone?
Oh, um...
Hm.
It was right there.
Was it?
Yeah, I'm telling you
that it was right there.
Oh.
I thought it was --
Where is it?
Uh, did you check
your pockets?
It's not
in my pocket, Dory.
-Okay.
-It was right there, okay?
Dory: Well, it's got
to be here somewhere.
Drew, you want
to check the kitchen?
Yeah, I'm on it.
-Um [Clears throat]
Have you --
Have you checked your --
your jacket pockets maybe?
Just saying.
Hey!
There it is.
See? I'm doing that
all the time.
I'm always thinking
I lost my phone,
and it just ends up being
in my jacket pocket.
Been there.
I did not put this there.
I would never put this there.
Weird.
[ Breathing heavily ]
What is this, huh?
What's --
What's going on here?
What do you mean,
Gavin?
Why are you touching
my stuff?
Hey.
You okay, buddy?
No, I'm not okay, okay?!
I don't tolerate
people touching my property
without my permission,
okay?!
Okay.
Okay, how would you feel
if I put my greasy paws
all over your stuff,
huh, huh?!
Gavin.
Huh?
How would you feel?
[ Screaming ]
Hey, Gavin, no!
Gavin!
Gavin, calm down.
How you feel about that?
How you feel about that, huh?
Unh-unh, no.
Please, calm down, Gavin.
Ohh, "Gavin,
please calm down."
Please calm down.
"Oh, Gavin, please, calm down.
I don't like it."
Come on.
Make me calm down.
Huh? Huh?!
Aah!
[ Panting ]
Gavin.
That's
what I thought...Drew.
♪ Do you remember? ♪
Some guy
you got there, Dory.
♪ What we did before? ♪
Gavin:
The two of you were made
for each other, you know that?
What the hell?!
♪♪
Did you know
that Chantal was pregnant?
[ Sighs ]
[ Door latch clicks ]
♪ Or are you mad? ♪
How did you know that?
Dory.
No, how did you know that?
How did you know about that?
Because I thought
that you might be
the father.
No, 'cause
she was cheating on me.
♪ And we were blacked out ♪
With who?
[ Coughs, burps ]
Oh!
Ohh! Oh.
-Oh!
-Ugh.
Oh, God!
[ Sighs ]
Gavin.
Oh, buddy.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Hey, uh...
I don't really like myself
sometimes.
Well, we almost had a nice time,
right? [ Chuckles ]
[ Grunts ]
Hey, Gavin.
I just have to ask, um --
Do you know who she might have
been cheating on you with?
Even if I knew that,
I-I feel like
it wouldn't make
that much sense for me
to confide in you.
Right.
Yeah.
Okay. Good night.
♪♪
He actually handled it
pretty well.
Hey, this is nuts.
What?
Don't you think
that tonight got,
oh, just a little bit
out of hand?
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, things
got a little intense, for sure,
but we found out
that she was cheating on him.
I mean, that's huge.
Is that honestly your takeaway
from this whole night?
Look at the apartment!
Have you not seen
the apartment?
It's not bad.
Dory, I told you that
that guy was crazy.
Did I not tell you that?
Yeah, but didn't I tell you that
he might have some information?
And he did.
So it's like
we're both right.
Okay, I don't know
what's going on.
I am not used to seeing you
like this.
But I'm gonna be honest
with you.
I don't like it.
Don't be mad at me, please.
I'm not mad at you, Dory.
I'm trying to talk to you.
No. Baby.
Stop.
Baby, stop.
Okay?
I need you
on my team for this.
What are you doing?
Baby, look,
I've been distracted.
I've been cleaning up puke,
okay?
Stop. Stop.
I'm not feeling this,
all right?
Okay.
That's fair?
Yeah.
Okay.
Mm-hmm.
I cleaned up
all that puke,
so can you at least
take out the trash?
Yeah.
[ Cuushe's
"We Can't Stop" plays ]
Who are you?
What do you want?
♪♪