1
00:00:02,570 --> 00:00:05,410
So get this. The new neighbors
down the block had a party,

2
00:00:05,439 --> 00:00:07,809
and invited everybody
on the street except us.

3
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:10,481
Great.

4
00:00:11,445 --> 00:00:14,345
What? No. Not great.

5
00:00:14,382 --> 00:00:16,152
I heard it
from that old hermit guy

6
00:00:16,184 --> 00:00:18,154
on the corner
who let all his grass die.

7
00:00:18,186 --> 00:00:19,316
Dirt Yard Bob?

8
00:00:20,454 --> 00:00:23,364
Yeah. They even invited
Dirt Yard Bob.

9
00:00:23,391 --> 00:00:25,361
The guy
that electrocuted himself

10
00:00:25,393 --> 00:00:27,533
trying to get free sneakers
off a power line.

11
00:00:30,464 --> 00:00:34,034
I heard that when he woke up, he
could suddenly play the piano.

12
00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:38,206
We used to get invited
to everything.

13
00:00:38,239 --> 00:00:40,569
I mean, potlucks,
holiday parties.

14
00:00:40,608 --> 00:00:42,778
What happened?
I happened.

15
00:00:42,810 --> 00:00:44,810
I cut the cord with
that bunch of mooches.

16
00:00:44,845 --> 00:00:46,545
:
You're welcome.

17
00:00:46,580 --> 00:00:49,420
Those people were
our friends.
No.

18
00:00:49,450 --> 00:00:52,220
No. No, no, no, no,
no, no. Mooches.

19
00:00:53,121 --> 00:00:54,561
Remember two years ago

20
00:00:54,588 --> 00:00:56,458
when we stayed home
on the Fourth of July?

21
00:00:56,490 --> 00:00:58,560
I got roped into
feeding all their cats.

22
00:00:58,592 --> 00:01:00,592
That's what neighbors do.

23
00:01:00,628 --> 00:01:02,328
You know what cats do?

24
00:01:02,363 --> 00:01:05,503
They hide, and then they
dive at you, claws first.

25
00:01:05,533 --> 00:01:07,143
They get off,
like, six punches

26
00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:09,398
before you know what
the hell happened.
Oh.

27
00:01:09,437 --> 00:01:11,567
Okay, well, remember

28
00:01:11,605 --> 00:01:14,575
when we let the Morrisons park
their boat in our driveway?

29
00:01:14,608 --> 00:01:16,508
Then they split up,
and the husband just

30
00:01:16,544 --> 00:01:17,684
lived on it for weeks.

31
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:20,879
That thing didn't have a toilet.

32
00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:23,124
Where did he go, Andi?

33
00:01:24,318 --> 00:01:25,818
We'll never know.

34
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:29,561
Yeah, but now we're outcasts.

35
00:01:29,590 --> 00:01:33,890
I mean, how did you manage
to alienate an entire block?

36
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:36,157
Well, it was pretty
easy, actually.

37
00:01:36,197 --> 00:01:38,167
You know, whenever someone
would want to make plans,

38
00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:40,569
I'd just say, "Oh, yeah, sure.
I'll have Andi call you."

39
00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:42,541
Then I never
told you to call.

40
00:01:42,570 --> 00:01:45,140
Then, when I'd run
into 'em , I'd say,

41
00:01:45,173 --> 00:01:47,513
"I can't believe
Andi never called you."

42
00:01:48,409 --> 00:01:50,809
Voilà.

43
00:01:50,844 --> 00:01:52,554
So I look like the bad guy.

44
00:01:52,580 --> 00:01:54,150
How do you think I feel?

45
00:01:54,182 --> 00:01:56,752
I look like I'm married
to the bad guy.

46
00:01:56,784 --> 00:01:59,294
You know what?
You've become unfriendly.

47
00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:00,750
What?
Mm.

48
00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:02,518
I have not.

49
00:02:02,556 --> 00:02:04,656
The neighbors
were all over us.

50
00:02:04,692 --> 00:02:09,302
When Germany invaded Poland, did
people call Poland unfriendly?

51
00:02:09,330 --> 00:02:11,530
Don't bring Germany
into this, all right?

52
00:02:11,565 --> 00:02:12,825
Every time
you're losing an argument,

53
00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:14,536
you call in the Germans.

54
00:02:14,568 --> 00:02:16,268
What's wrong
with being neighborly?

55
00:02:16,304 --> 00:02:18,474
I just don't get it.

56
00:02:18,506 --> 00:02:20,906
I mean, why do I have to
be buddies with someone

57
00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:24,581
just because of a
geographical coincidence?

58
00:02:24,612 --> 00:02:26,952
You know? I'm sure somebody
lived next to Mussolini.

59
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:29,950
Were they watching his cat?

60
00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:32,793
And here come the Italians.

61
00:02:32,820 --> 00:02:36,290
Look, bottom line,
I did us a favor.

62
00:02:36,324 --> 00:02:37,934
I can't believe it took
you this long to notice.

63
00:02:37,958 --> 00:02:39,728
Well, I've been busy working.

64
00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:41,560
I just... I wasn't
paying attention.

65
00:02:41,595 --> 00:02:44,895
Oh. I just thought you
were quietly on board.

66
00:02:44,932 --> 00:02:47,572
You know? It's
like upstairs.

67
00:02:47,601 --> 00:02:50,901
If you don't make a face,
I just keep going.

68
00:02:53,741 --> 00:02:55,241
ADAM:
And then Andi said

69
00:02:55,276 --> 00:02:56,676
I was unfriendly.

70
00:02:56,710 --> 00:02:59,280
I was kind of expecting
a thank you.

71
00:02:59,313 --> 00:03:00,683
From your wife?

72
00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:02,524
That's not what they do.

73
00:03:02,550 --> 00:03:04,820
I'm a friendly guy.

74
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:06,952
I mean, Lowell,
we became friends.

75
00:03:06,987 --> 00:03:08,857
It was the hardest thing
I've ever done,

76
00:03:08,889 --> 00:03:10,519
and I knitted this sweater vest.

77
00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:14,860
I'm looking
for Adam Burns.

78
00:03:14,895 --> 00:03:17,325
Are you a singing telegram?

79
00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:18,795
I am not.

80
00:03:18,832 --> 00:03:20,532
Oh. Then he's over there.

81
00:03:20,568 --> 00:03:23,438
I'm the new county inspector.

82
00:03:23,471 --> 00:03:24,971
I just checked
your concrete slab.

83
00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:26,535
Oh, great. Yeah, as
soon as you sign off,

84
00:03:26,574 --> 00:03:27,744
we can start framing.

85
00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:29,535
I'm not signing off.
It's still wet.

86
00:03:29,577 --> 00:03:31,777
And you knew that
when you called me down here.

87
00:03:31,812 --> 00:03:34,252
The inspector we had
before did it all the time.

88
00:03:34,282 --> 00:03:36,982
He understood the concept
of leeway, you know.

89
00:03:37,017 --> 00:03:39,747
I don't believe in leeway.
I believe in my way.

90
00:03:39,787 --> 00:03:42,717
Oh. Okay.

91
00:03:42,756 --> 00:03:44,726
Look, new lady...
My name's Joy.

92
00:03:44,758 --> 00:03:47,598
Well, somebody
lied to you.

93
00:03:49,863 --> 00:03:51,733
I don't know if
they taught you this

94
00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:53,795
in county inspector school,
but concrete dries, okay?

95
00:03:53,834 --> 00:03:55,774
That's why the sidewalks
aren't full of skeletons

96
00:03:55,803 --> 00:03:57,443
trying to pull
their legs out.

97
00:03:57,471 --> 00:04:00,741
I don't know if they taught
you this in contractor school,

98
00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:02,844
but you don't talk
to me like that.

99
00:04:02,876 --> 00:04:06,746
Joke's on her. I didn't even go
to contractor school.

100
00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:09,380
Okay, look, it's
gonna be two weeks

101
00:04:09,417 --> 00:04:10,847
before that slab
cures all the way.

102
00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:12,754
If you don't sign off,
my guys can't work,

103
00:04:12,786 --> 00:04:14,916
and I'm paying 'em to do
nothing. That's a problem.

104
00:04:14,955 --> 00:04:15,955
That's your problem.

105
00:04:15,989 --> 00:04:17,359
Until you got here,

106
00:04:17,391 --> 00:04:18,791
I didn't have a problem!

107
00:04:18,826 --> 00:04:20,626
Did you just raise
your voice at me?

108
00:04:20,661 --> 00:04:22,801
Well...
I do not take
kindly to that, sir,

109
00:04:22,830 --> 00:04:24,830
because then I am forced
to do the same.

110
00:04:24,865 --> 00:04:29,435
And if this is a talking-loud
competition, I will win it!

111
00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:34,706
: Well, maybe it's
a talking-soft competition,

112
00:04:34,742 --> 00:04:36,412
and I'm winning it.

113
00:04:38,045 --> 00:04:41,045
What? Just send the other
inspector back. He knew me.

114
00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:42,681
Well, I do not know you, sir,

115
00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:44,816
and so far, what I've seen,
I do not like.

116
00:04:44,852 --> 00:04:46,822
You are very unfriendly.

117
00:04:46,854 --> 00:04:48,724
Unfriendly? Wha-What
do you want me to do,

118
00:04:48,756 --> 00:04:50,686
make you a balloon animal?

119
00:04:50,724 --> 00:04:53,494
I've red-tagged a lot of slabs,

120
00:04:53,527 --> 00:04:55,497
and this has given me
the most pleasure.

121
00:04:55,529 --> 00:04:58,699
That's right,
"pleasure," as in "joy."

122
00:05:05,939 --> 00:05:07,069
ADAM:
I can't believe

123
00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:08,877
two people
who don't even know each other

124
00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:10,979
both said I was unfriendly.
Hey,

125
00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:12,751
everybody's born with a certain
amount of friendly in them.

126
00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:15,620
You use most of it
trying to get a wife.

127
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:17,819
Then you're pretty much
tapped out by 45.

128
00:05:18,852 --> 00:05:20,752
I think of myself
as a friendly guy.

129
00:05:20,788 --> 00:05:22,958
I like to bowl, shoot pool,
play softball.

130
00:05:22,990 --> 00:05:25,860
Mm-hmm. When was the last time
you did any of that?

131
00:05:25,893 --> 00:05:28,063
Uh, well, okay, uh...

132
00:05:28,095 --> 00:05:30,625
Oh, I know. It was...
Uh, no, that was a movie.

133
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:33,134
No. All right, well,
it's not all my fault.

134
00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:35,536
I mean, we don't even have
a softball team anymore.

135
00:05:35,569 --> 00:05:39,069
Sure we do.
But I quit.
I was the heart of the team.

136
00:05:39,106 --> 00:05:40,766
Well, we had a heart transplant.

137
00:05:42,109 --> 00:05:43,879
I play second base.

138
00:05:43,911 --> 00:05:45,751
I'm learning how to spit
in front of other people.

139
00:05:46,847 --> 00:05:47,977
There was a time
you would have known

140
00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:49,045
about Lowell's struggle
with spitting.

141
00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:52,118
Well...

142
00:05:52,152 --> 00:05:53,922
I mean, maybe Andi's right.

143
00:05:53,954 --> 00:05:55,694
Maybe I have gotten
a little cranky.

144
00:05:55,723 --> 00:05:57,963
She is right.
I can tell you she's right.

145
00:05:57,991 --> 00:05:59,761
And not just with the neighbors.

146
00:05:59,793 --> 00:06:02,903
I mean,
I think the problem is me.

147
00:06:02,930 --> 00:06:05,170
It is. I can tell you it is.

148
00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:08,038
Hmm. You know what? I'm gonna
turn this thing around.

149
00:06:08,068 --> 00:06:09,938
Starting right now, I'm, uh...

150
00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:12,410
I'm rejoining the softball team.

151
00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,540
Whoa. Whoa! You can't just
rejoin. You have to try out.

152
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:16,905
I'm not trying out
for my own company's team.

153
00:06:16,944 --> 00:06:19,114
I like your moxie.
Welcome aboard.

154
00:06:19,146 --> 00:06:21,006
Yeah.

155
00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:23,578
*

156
00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:34,860
Hey.

157
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:36,825
Well, you were right.

158
00:06:36,864 --> 00:06:38,974
Turns out I'm the town crank.

159
00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:40,999
Oh, honey.

160
00:06:41,034 --> 00:06:43,874
You know, the first step
to getting better is admitting

161
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:45,644
you have a problem.

162
00:06:46,974 --> 00:06:49,544
And that I'm right.
That's my favorite part.

163
00:06:49,577 --> 00:06:53,507
Okay, well, I am ready
to be friendly, okay?

164
00:06:53,547 --> 00:06:55,947
So let's try and fix things
with those idiot neighbors.

165
00:06:55,983 --> 00:06:57,853
I know.

166
00:06:57,885 --> 00:07:00,715
We'll have a potluck
for the whole street.

167
00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,894
Yeah, I-I can make fliers
and-and put 'em

168
00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:04,963
in everybody's mailbox, and...

169
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:07,859
I'm getting a fruit bouquet.

170
00:07:07,895 --> 00:07:08,955
Great.

171
00:07:08,996 --> 00:07:11,026
No, no. A pineapple swan.

172
00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:13,004
Whatever it takes.

173
00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:17,143
I-I don't want to end
up like Dirt Yard Bob.

174
00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:19,640
Although I would love
to play the piano.

175
00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:24,008
Hey, um, since
you're in the mood for change,

176
00:07:24,044 --> 00:07:26,984
um, do you want to talk
about your flannel shirts?

177
00:07:30,551 --> 00:07:32,251
What's wrong
with my flannels?

178
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:34,185
That's my look.
People love it.

179
00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:36,861
And I love it. Yeah.

180
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:39,930
I mean, they're practical.
Uh-huh.

181
00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:42,030
'Cause you never know
when you might be on a river

182
00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:44,872
spinning a log under your feet.

183
00:07:44,898 --> 00:07:48,668
And when that happens,
I will be ready.

184
00:07:52,072 --> 00:07:55,042
Hey, hey, hey, uh,
uh, uh, hands off.

185
00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:57,645
Those are the name-brand snacks
we save for strangers.

186
00:07:57,678 --> 00:07:59,008
If you're hungry,
go to the pantry

187
00:07:59,046 --> 00:08:01,716
and get yourself some
Ding-Dangs or a Twonkie.

188
00:08:01,749 --> 00:08:03,719
Okay, kids,

189
00:08:03,751 --> 00:08:05,691
and stay away
from the door, all right?

190
00:08:05,719 --> 00:08:07,719
'Cause it's about to fly open,
and I don't want you

191
00:08:07,755 --> 00:08:09,155
to get trampled
by a mob of neighbors

192
00:08:09,189 --> 00:08:10,819
who can't wait to see us.

193
00:08:11,859 --> 00:08:14,029
Where's the mob
of neighbors?

194
00:08:14,061 --> 00:08:17,101
I haven't seen a car
drive by all day.

195
00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:18,900
Even the birds are gone.

196
00:08:18,932 --> 00:08:21,132
Did the rapture happen?

197
00:08:23,103 --> 00:08:25,273
Wasn't this party supposed
to start a half an hour ago?

198
00:08:25,305 --> 00:08:27,035
Oh, the guy
who takes 45-minute showers

199
00:08:27,074 --> 00:08:30,084
can suddenly tell time.

200
00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:32,950
Oh, all right,
there's Dirt Yard Bob.

201
00:08:32,980 --> 00:08:34,310
I'll go see
if he knows anything.

202
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:36,217
Yo, Dirt Yard--

203
00:08:36,249 --> 00:08:38,919
Hey, Bob!

204
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:42,290
So, where are we
on snacks?

205
00:08:42,322 --> 00:08:44,892
I'd like to eat some of that
guacamole before it goes bad.

206
00:08:44,925 --> 00:08:47,325
: Like this party.
Am I right, guys?

207
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:51,000
Yeah, that's funny.

208
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,971
Yeah.

209
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:55,700
I'm gonna remember that when
you're 16, and you want a car.

210
00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:00,335
Hey, come on,
we've had our fun. Let's go.

211
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:04,143
Let's go clean our rooms because
we have the best parents ever.

212
00:09:04,177 --> 00:09:06,777
I like it. I don't believe it,
but I like it.

213
00:09:10,250 --> 00:09:12,690
Dirt Yard says that
the new neighbors took everyone

214
00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:14,090
to the Steelers Stadium.

215
00:09:14,121 --> 00:09:15,321
Yeah. The husband works there,

216
00:09:15,355 --> 00:09:16,955
and he's giving a tour
of the locker room.

217
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:20,090
So they stole
our party guests?

218
00:09:20,127 --> 00:09:22,157
We can't compete
with the Steelers.
Ugh.

219
00:09:22,195 --> 00:09:24,055
Our party doesn't even
have a theme.

220
00:09:24,097 --> 00:09:26,127
Uh, guacamole
and pizza bites?

221
00:09:26,166 --> 00:09:29,966
Who are we?
What's our message?

222
00:09:30,003 --> 00:09:32,173
Let's think
about this.

223
00:09:39,212 --> 00:09:42,052
Okay, well, we already
ticked off the old neighbors.

224
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,882
Oh, you don't
know the half of it.

225
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:46,987
But the new neighbors
don't know us well enough

226
00:09:47,020 --> 00:09:49,660
not to like us, right?

227
00:09:49,690 --> 00:09:51,290
So we make nice
with them, and then,

228
00:09:51,324 --> 00:09:54,064
we can worm our way back
into the community from there.

229
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,834
Yeah, we can do that.

230
00:09:55,863 --> 00:09:58,803
We've wormed our way
into plenty of stuff.

231
00:09:58,832 --> 00:10:00,332
Yeah, so when the new
neighbors get home,

232
00:10:00,367 --> 00:10:01,997
we'll go over there,
and we'll make nice.

233
00:10:02,035 --> 00:10:03,865
Good plan.

234
00:10:03,904 --> 00:10:06,174
Okay, now, is there any way
I could dress you for this?

235
00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:07,976
Hey, we agreed a long time ago.

236
00:10:08,008 --> 00:10:09,378
You're not allowed to dress me.

237
00:10:12,079 --> 00:10:14,749
What if I promise to
undress you first?

238
00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:18,190
Oh, that's a dirty trick.

239
00:10:18,218 --> 00:10:19,688
All right,
I'll meet you upstairs.

240
00:10:21,722 --> 00:10:23,722
Bring the guacamole.

241
00:10:29,196 --> 00:10:31,196
I hate this shirt.

242
00:10:31,231 --> 00:10:33,001
I think you look handsome.

243
00:10:33,033 --> 00:10:35,703
I look like you dressed me
at babyGap.

244
00:10:35,736 --> 00:10:37,866
Okay, now, remember,
we have to be friendly.

245
00:10:37,905 --> 00:10:39,905
All right?
Especially to the wife.

246
00:10:39,940 --> 00:10:41,710
Don't worry. Wives love me.

247
00:10:41,742 --> 00:10:43,882
We'll be pals
inside of 20 minutes.

248
00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:48,347
Hiya.

249
00:10:48,381 --> 00:10:50,251
Hello.

250
00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:53,723
This might take longer
than 20 minutes.

251
00:11:00,227 --> 00:11:01,357
Step away from my welcome mat.

252
00:11:01,394 --> 00:11:03,434
It does not apply to you.

253
00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:06,373
So, I guess

254
00:11:06,399 --> 00:11:08,699
the new neighbors do know us
well enough not to like us.

255
00:11:08,736 --> 00:11:10,696
You know that really nice

256
00:11:10,738 --> 00:11:12,208
county inspector
I was telling you about?

257
00:11:12,239 --> 00:11:13,969
Well, Joy here replaced him.

258
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:17,277
I guess in your private life
you dress like Blue's Clues.

259
00:11:18,779 --> 00:11:20,479
And now we're neighbors.

260
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:23,753
"Neighbors"? I paid $400
for a home inspector.

261
00:11:23,784 --> 00:11:26,324
He said we were pest-free.

262
00:11:26,353 --> 00:11:30,223
Inspectors, huh?
They're the worst.

263
00:11:30,257 --> 00:11:32,987
I am closing my door now.

264
00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:36,227
Now, she is unfriendly.

265
00:11:36,263 --> 00:11:38,473
She was the one person
we had to make friends with,

266
00:11:38,498 --> 00:11:39,728
and you've already
ticked her off.

267
00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:40,967
Hey, we're not out of this.

268
00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:42,471
She got a husband, right?
Some poor guy

269
00:11:42,502 --> 00:11:45,242
was tricked into marrying her.

270
00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:47,442
Husbands love me.

271
00:11:47,474 --> 00:11:49,984
Five minutes ago,
wives loved you.

272
00:11:50,010 --> 00:11:51,910
I'm telling you,
I'm great with guys.

273
00:11:51,945 --> 00:11:54,205
If you let me put my flannel on,
I can save this.

274
00:11:54,247 --> 00:11:55,247
I'm all Clark Kent now.

275
00:11:55,282 --> 00:11:56,822
Let me be Superman.

276
00:11:56,850 --> 00:11:59,320
No, no. Not Superman.

277
00:11:59,352 --> 00:12:02,022
Flannel-Man.

278
00:12:04,091 --> 00:12:05,291
You're gonna want me

279
00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,955
to call you that now,
aren't you?

280
00:12:07,995 --> 00:12:09,825
I don't need you to. No.

281
00:12:09,863 --> 00:12:11,233
Flannel-Man knows who he is.

282
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:17,503
Hey, honey.
How's it going?

283
00:12:17,537 --> 00:12:19,237
Hey. Great. Yeah.

284
00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:21,072
I invited Joy's husband over
for a beer.

285
00:12:21,108 --> 00:12:23,038
I left a note on his truck.

286
00:12:23,076 --> 00:12:25,306
Isn't that kind of stalkery?

287
00:12:25,345 --> 00:12:26,005
No, no.

288
00:12:26,046 --> 00:12:28,046
That's how flannel guys text.

289
00:12:29,349 --> 00:12:30,519
And his name's Rudy.
I found that out

290
00:12:30,550 --> 00:12:32,150
when I went through his mail.

291
00:12:33,887 --> 00:12:36,087
Oh! That's him.

292
00:12:36,123 --> 00:12:38,363
Okay. Save the day, Flannel-Man.

293
00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:45,395
Rudy. Hey.

294
00:12:45,432 --> 00:12:47,402
: Nice shirt,
huh? Look at that.

295
00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:49,874
Huh?
Yeah. Just so you know,

296
00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:52,013
I'm very sorry
for what's about to happen.

297
00:12:52,039 --> 00:12:53,309
Oh, why?
What

298
00:12:53,340 --> 00:12:54,770
Listen up, man!

299
00:12:55,876 --> 00:12:59,076
My wife is watching
from across the street!

300
00:13:00,147 --> 00:13:01,507
She wanted me
to come over here

301
00:13:01,548 --> 00:13:03,018
and yell at you!

302
00:13:03,050 --> 00:13:06,150
She really likes it
when I do this!

303
00:13:07,387 --> 00:13:11,157
So I need to have a fake fight
with you right now,

304
00:13:11,191 --> 00:13:13,961
or I'm gonna have a real one
when I get home!

305
00:13:16,329 --> 00:13:18,429
Okay, I-I was just hoping

306
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,195
we could talk this out
man-to-man.

307
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,373
What you need to understand

308
00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:26,372
is I can't help you

309
00:13:26,406 --> 00:13:29,006
'cause I can't help myself!

310
00:13:30,543 --> 00:13:32,513
Maybe when all of this
blows over,

311
00:13:32,545 --> 00:13:34,375
we can get that beer!

312
00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:48,034
Are you sure you want
to be friends with them?

313
00:13:48,061 --> 00:13:49,601
I bet there's somebody out there
looking for them

314
00:13:49,629 --> 00:13:52,199
with a big butterfly net.

315
00:13:52,232 --> 00:13:54,332
Honey, I want to be part
of the community.

316
00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:56,597
I want to know our neighbors.
It's nice.

317
00:13:56,636 --> 00:13:58,406
Look, I want you
to have all that,

318
00:13:58,438 --> 00:14:00,308
but I don't know
what else to do.

319
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:01,370
You know what

320
00:14:01,408 --> 00:14:03,378
Honey, you tried, okay?

321
00:14:03,410 --> 00:14:04,340
And that's what's important.

322
00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:07,147
And that's why I love you.

323
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:12,622
Well, that makes me
want to try even more.

324
00:14:12,652 --> 00:14:16,522
Would it help
if I undressed you again?

325
00:14:18,425 --> 00:14:20,455
Come on.

326
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:24,062
LOWELL:
Okay.

327
00:14:24,097 --> 00:14:25,897
Joy's out there
checking the slab.

328
00:14:25,933 --> 00:14:27,403
And yelling at Big Ernie.

329
00:14:27,434 --> 00:14:30,404
Boy, she's a real multitasker.

330
00:14:30,437 --> 00:14:32,067
Okay, great.
When she comes in here,

331
00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:33,405
remember our plan.

332
00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:37,010
What was it again?
Lowell forgot.

333
00:14:37,044 --> 00:14:38,484
You two pick a fight with Joy,

334
00:14:38,511 --> 00:14:39,981
and I'll defend her
by yelling at you.

335
00:14:40,013 --> 00:14:41,453
According to her husband,
she loves that,

336
00:14:41,481 --> 00:14:44,021
so she'll love me,
and our problems will be solved.

337
00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:45,521
But then she'll be mad at us.

338
00:14:45,552 --> 00:14:47,522
Yeah, but that's
your problem. Okay?

339
00:14:47,554 --> 00:14:51,194
You guys can come up
with your own plan to fix that.

340
00:14:51,224 --> 00:14:53,264
Ooh, here she comes.
Showtime.

341
00:14:53,293 --> 00:14:55,233
Places, everybody.

342
00:14:56,696 --> 00:14:58,496
Joy!

343
00:14:58,531 --> 00:14:59,931
What a surprise.

344
00:14:59,967 --> 00:15:01,667
Mr. Burns, I got your message,

345
00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:03,341
and I've rechecked
the concrete.

346
00:15:03,370 --> 00:15:04,940
I'm a professional.

347
00:15:04,972 --> 00:15:06,942
I put my personal feelings
aside.

348
00:15:06,974 --> 00:15:10,044
So, you'll be thrilled to know
it's still not ready.

349
00:15:11,211 --> 00:15:13,351
No!

350
00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:15,250
I will not watch this she-devil

351
00:15:15,282 --> 00:15:18,222
tear down everything we
worked so hard to build.

352
00:15:19,152 --> 00:15:21,092
Me, neither, Don.

353
00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:24,221
You're a mean, mean lady.

354
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:25,687
All right, that's enough.

355
00:15:25,725 --> 00:15:27,525
I'm not gonna let you two
talk to Joy like that.

356
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,530
Okay, we need more
people like her

357
00:15:29,562 --> 00:15:32,202
who follow the rules
and try to do the right thing.

358
00:15:32,232 --> 00:15:34,702
Mr. Burns...

359
00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:36,674
And I'll tell you
something else.

360
00:15:36,703 --> 00:15:39,573
As a woman,
she has to work twice as hard

361
00:15:39,606 --> 00:15:41,136
to get half as far.

362
00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:45,282
All while maintaining
perfect hair.

363
00:15:45,312 --> 00:15:47,412
It really is fantastic.

364
00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:50,577
I was wrong before.

365
00:15:51,351 --> 00:15:52,451
Joy is her name

366
00:15:52,485 --> 00:15:54,545
because that's who she is

367
00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:56,587
and that's what she spreads.

368
00:15:57,590 --> 00:15:59,460
Did you really think

369
00:15:59,492 --> 00:16:01,562
I was gonna fall for
your little show?

370
00:16:01,594 --> 00:16:03,364
I mean, the big one was good,

371
00:16:03,396 --> 00:16:05,126
but the little one was shaky.

372
00:16:05,165 --> 00:16:08,595
I didn't connect
with the material.
Okay.

373
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:10,135
You know what?
It was a Hail Mary.

374
00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:11,570
I'm desperate here.

375
00:16:11,604 --> 00:16:13,714
Okay, my wife really wants
to be friends with you,

376
00:16:13,740 --> 00:16:16,480
and I really need you
to sign off on that slab,

377
00:16:16,509 --> 00:16:19,349
and none of that is happening
because you don't like me.

378
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:20,409
Okay, so,

379
00:16:20,447 --> 00:16:21,547
I need to get on your good side.

380
00:16:21,581 --> 00:16:22,551
What do I do?

381
00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:24,452
Tell you what.

382
00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:27,154
You pick one.
I'll sign off on the slab,

383
00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:29,257
or I'll be friends
with your wife.

384
00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:34,585
Pick the slab.

385
00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:39,303
Pick the slab.

386
00:16:40,300 --> 00:16:41,800
No. You know what?

387
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,444
If I have to choose,

388
00:16:43,470 --> 00:16:45,540
I'm gonna go with Andi.

389
00:16:45,572 --> 00:16:46,812
I respect that.

390
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:49,539
Maybe I misjudged you.

391
00:16:49,576 --> 00:16:50,806
And you picked
the right one,

392
00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:53,213
because I am not signing
off on that wet slab.

393
00:16:53,246 --> 00:16:55,546
You're a mean, mean lady.

394
00:16:55,582 --> 00:16:57,082
Lowell, Lowell. Whoa. Hey, hey.

395
00:16:57,117 --> 00:16:58,517
It's over.

396
00:16:58,551 --> 00:17:00,051
I can't turn it off.

397
00:17:05,392 --> 00:17:06,732
Hey. Great news, babe.

398
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:08,529
I picked up
something for dinner:

399
00:17:08,561 --> 00:17:09,631
our new neighbors.

400
00:17:12,565 --> 00:17:14,625
Aw, Flannel-Man.

401
00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:16,667
Hi.

402
00:17:16,703 --> 00:17:18,643
I'm Andi. And together,

403
00:17:18,671 --> 00:17:21,671
we are going to dominate
this cul-de-sac.

404
00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:24,308
I like you already.

405
00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:28,782
So, Janet had a thing
with Dirt Yard Bob?

406
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:30,645
Yeah.

407
00:17:30,683 --> 00:17:33,593
He had grass back then.

408
00:17:33,620 --> 00:17:35,690
He seduced her with his piano.

409
00:17:37,690 --> 00:17:41,160
I'm sorry my husband came
down on you so hard.

410
00:17:41,194 --> 00:17:42,634
Yeah, but you watch your step,

411
00:17:42,662 --> 00:17:45,232
or we'll go outside
and settle this like men.

412
00:17:50,203 --> 00:17:52,713
Hey, uh, honey, you know
what I was thinking?

413
00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:55,479
Huh?
We should host a potluck
with these guys.

414
00:17:55,508 --> 00:17:56,638
You know, have all the
neighbors over here.

415
00:17:56,676 --> 00:17:58,306
That's a great idea.

416
00:17:58,345 --> 00:18:01,205
I already have a pineapple swan.

417
00:18:01,248 --> 00:18:03,478
Well, the kids ate the neck,

418
00:18:03,516 --> 00:18:06,116
so now it's more of
a pineapple duck.

419
00:18:06,153 --> 00:18:09,563
Sorry, we're not speaking
to any of the neighbors.

420
00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:12,089
They're all a bunch of mooches.

421
00:18:16,829 --> 00:18:18,699
You know what, Joy?
You're right.

422
00:18:18,731 --> 00:18:20,301
They are mooches.

423
00:18:21,201 --> 00:18:23,141
What? When I said that,

424
00:18:23,170 --> 00:18:24,870
you said I was unfriendly.

425
00:18:24,904 --> 00:18:26,614
Well, yes, but now

426
00:18:26,639 --> 00:18:28,239
I'm hearing it
from the community.

427
00:18:28,275 --> 00:18:30,475
See?

428
00:18:30,510 --> 00:18:32,810
Okay, we
should get home.

429
00:18:32,845 --> 00:18:35,315
Rudy and I have tai chi
in the morning.

430
00:18:35,348 --> 00:18:37,278
Yeah, that's what keeps her
so mellow.

431
00:18:39,319 --> 00:18:41,689
You know,
we should do this again.

432
00:18:41,721 --> 00:18:43,521
You'll find

433
00:18:43,556 --> 00:18:46,286
I'm a lot looser once I take off
my inspector's badge.

434
00:18:46,326 --> 00:18:48,156
Hey, you know,
speaking of inspections,

435
00:18:48,195 --> 00:18:49,825
what do you say we celebrate
everyone getting along

436
00:18:49,862 --> 00:18:53,172
by signing off
on that slab, huh?

437
00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:54,930
Well, I guess
since we're friends now,

438
00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:57,667
I'll sign off on it
when I'm good and ready.

439
00:18:57,704 --> 00:18:59,444
But...

440
00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:00,772
What happened?

441
00:19:00,807 --> 00:19:01,907
You heard the lady!

442
00:19:01,941 --> 00:19:04,481
She said
when she's good and ready!

443
00:19:05,912 --> 00:19:07,752
:
I can't help you.

444
00:19:10,817 --> 00:19:12,817
Look at us.

445
00:19:12,852 --> 00:19:14,892
We got new friends for me.

446
00:19:14,921 --> 00:19:17,221
And they hate
everybody else for me.

447
00:19:25,598 --> 00:19:26,628
Okay.

448
00:19:26,666 --> 00:19:28,296
All right.

449
00:19:28,335 --> 00:19:29,465
Since you're joining
the softball team,

450
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:31,872
here's your jersey.
Oh.

451
00:19:37,877 --> 00:19:41,507
You named our softball team
the Master Batters?

452
00:19:41,548 --> 00:19:43,848
Yes, I did.

453
00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:46,623
I'm not wearing that.

454
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:48,663
Well, what's wrong?

455
00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:50,518
It's not tough enough?

456
00:19:50,557 --> 00:19:53,187
How about
the Furious Master Batters?

457
00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:57,727
Adding words isn't gonna help.

458
00:19:57,764 --> 00:19:59,904
I don't see a problem.
Look, we're called that

459
00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:01,502
because we're so good
at getting hits.

460
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:04,574
I want everyone to know
I'm a master batter.

461
00:20:07,274 --> 00:20:08,684
Oh.

462
00:20:08,708 --> 00:20:11,638
Okay, Lowell,
say it in your head,

463
00:20:11,678 --> 00:20:14,548
and remember Don is the one
who came up with it.

464
00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,224
Don!

465
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:28,630
I wore this to church.

466
00:20:28,661 --> 00:20:30,661
Captioning sponsored by
CBS

467
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,400
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
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