1 00:00:02,043 --> 00:00:03,483 How is Bernie?She's at the station. 2 00:00:03,523 --> 00:00:06,163 She's latched on to something on Adeen's phone to do with Grandad. 3 00:00:06,203 --> 00:00:07,683 What are you doing?! 4 00:00:07,723 --> 00:00:10,003 Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. 5 00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:12,403 It's all this talk about Lance, it's really got to me. 6 00:00:12,443 --> 00:00:14,203 I can't discuss my work! 7 00:00:14,243 --> 00:00:15,443 Call Andrew! 8 00:00:15,483 --> 00:00:17,243 Did you get a message on your phone tonight, 9 00:00:17,283 --> 00:00:18,643 saying you had a missed call? No. 10 00:00:18,683 --> 00:00:19,843 What are you saying, Kieran? 11 00:00:19,883 --> 00:00:22,603 I don't know. There's something off about him! 12 00:00:22,643 --> 00:00:24,083 Something not right. 13 00:00:24,123 --> 00:00:25,643 It's a boy! 14 00:00:25,683 --> 00:00:27,083 I need to see Kathleen. 15 00:00:27,123 --> 00:00:29,323 She's just got off to sleep and I'd rather not wake her. 16 00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:31,323 Who are you to decide if I can see my mother? 17 00:00:31,363 --> 00:00:33,363 Can I ask you something? It's about my father. 18 00:00:33,403 --> 00:00:35,403 Dermott deserves to know the truth! 19 00:00:35,443 --> 00:00:37,523 Well, I can't do it, and I won't! 20 00:00:37,563 --> 00:00:39,963 You don't look to well, you know. I'm all right, darling. 21 00:00:40,003 --> 00:00:42,123 The doctor said I was going to get the odd headache. 22 00:00:42,163 --> 00:00:45,083 I don't know why Dad thinks he's so great. 23 00:00:45,123 --> 00:00:46,883 I think the world of you. 24 00:00:46,923 --> 00:00:49,523 Bernie, she needs you. 25 00:00:49,563 --> 00:00:53,283 You committed the most barbaric violation against nature there is. 26 00:00:53,323 --> 00:00:57,003 You ripped me from my mother, and that's why I'm like this. 27 00:01:20,643 --> 00:01:21,963 WAVES CRASH 28 00:01:22,003 --> 00:01:23,403 GULLS CRY 29 00:01:27,523 --> 00:01:29,283 MUSIC ON RADIO 30 00:02:07,643 --> 00:02:09,323 Alfie? 31 00:02:11,883 --> 00:02:13,683 I knew we weren't on the best of terms, 32 00:02:13,723 --> 00:02:16,843 but I wasn't expecting you to swing for me. 33 00:02:20,643 --> 00:02:22,083 What did you think was there? 34 00:02:23,363 --> 00:02:25,003 You startled me, that's all. 35 00:02:27,363 --> 00:02:29,283 Hm. Well, you should really get this checked out 36 00:02:29,323 --> 00:02:30,363 at the hospital, you know? 37 00:02:30,403 --> 00:02:33,803 I'll be fine.Yeah, well, if there's a piece of glass left in there... 38 00:02:33,843 --> 00:02:37,443 Dermott, I'm...just overtired, that's all. 39 00:02:38,843 --> 00:02:40,643 OK. 40 00:02:40,683 --> 00:02:42,443 By the way, Kat's not here. 41 00:02:44,323 --> 00:02:46,523 Yeah, I can see that. Well, I'll tell her you popped in. 42 00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:50,043 Actually, er... 43 00:02:51,243 --> 00:02:52,763 ..it's you I came to see. 44 00:02:57,443 --> 00:02:59,163 I think I owe you an apology. 45 00:02:59,203 --> 00:03:00,563 For the way I, er... 46 00:03:01,643 --> 00:03:03,483 Well, barged in here the other night. 47 00:03:07,563 --> 00:03:10,203 Listen...I suppose if I'd delivered a baby 48 00:03:10,243 --> 00:03:12,003 on the floor of a prison cell, 49 00:03:12,043 --> 00:03:15,483 I'd be running around like a headless chicken, too, so... 50 00:03:16,603 --> 00:03:18,163 ..apology accepted. 51 00:03:18,203 --> 00:03:19,483 Thank you. 52 00:03:21,483 --> 00:03:24,243 Anyway, er...make sure you keep changing this dressing 53 00:03:24,283 --> 00:03:27,163 and, er...keep it, er...clean and sterile, yeah? 54 00:03:27,203 --> 00:03:30,523 OK. What is it, a two-for-one deal today, then(?) 55 00:03:31,843 --> 00:03:33,563 Sorry?Father Dolan. 56 00:03:33,603 --> 00:03:37,323 Not only saves souls, but mortal flesh, an' all. Huh! 57 00:03:39,523 --> 00:03:40,883 Hm. 58 00:04:00,963 --> 00:04:02,563 We need to leave, Dermott. 59 00:04:02,603 --> 00:04:04,803 The house is full of lies. 60 00:04:04,843 --> 00:04:06,203 Go and get your coat. 61 00:04:11,363 --> 00:04:12,843 Go, now! 62 00:04:15,043 --> 00:04:16,963 WAVES CRASH 63 00:05:10,563 --> 00:05:12,443 BIRDSONG 64 00:05:13,803 --> 00:05:15,963 It does work, it just needs... 65 00:05:16,003 --> 00:05:19,083 What's wrong with the CD player I have already? 66 00:05:19,123 --> 00:05:22,723 Mam's just getting over tapes, aren't you? 67 00:05:22,763 --> 00:05:26,323 This is Bluetooth, Mammy. It's modern. 68 00:05:26,363 --> 00:05:28,683 Oh, Bluetooth, redtooth, blacktooth, 69 00:05:28,723 --> 00:05:31,643 call it what you will, girl, it clearly doesn't work. 70 00:05:33,563 --> 00:05:35,363 MUSIC: My Donegal Shore by Daniel O'Donnell 71 00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:38,563 See? Listen to the sound quality of that. 72 00:05:38,603 --> 00:05:40,003 Can you hear it? 73 00:05:40,043 --> 00:05:42,883 It's almost like he's in the room with us! 74 00:05:42,923 --> 00:05:45,043 Can it do the washing up, too?(!) 75 00:05:45,083 --> 00:05:47,483 Well, if you don't want it, I can always take it back. 76 00:05:47,523 --> 00:05:49,723 I didn't say I didn't want it, now. 77 00:05:49,763 --> 00:05:53,083 I have a homosexual grandson, you'll remember. 78 00:05:53,123 --> 00:05:55,643 I was never one to fear modernity. 79 00:05:55,683 --> 00:05:58,963 Yeah, you tell them, Gran. And with Cois Dara razed to the ground 80 00:05:59,003 --> 00:06:02,523 and plans afoot to rebuild and, er...what did you call it? 81 00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:06,163 Rebrand.Rebrand. 82 00:06:06,203 --> 00:06:08,403 I'd better keep up with the future, hadn't I? 83 00:06:10,403 --> 00:06:13,923 So, um...how's the kitten doing? 84 00:06:13,963 --> 00:06:15,123 What's this, now? 85 00:06:15,163 --> 00:06:20,083 Oh, Dr Dolittle here has taken in a feral kitten. 86 00:06:20,123 --> 00:06:22,723 Called Lady, if you don't mind. 87 00:06:22,763 --> 00:06:24,803 Yep. She's sleeping through, taking the bottle. 88 00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:27,243 Fingers crossed we can get her name down for a good school. 89 00:06:27,283 --> 00:06:28,843 THEY CHUCKLE 90 00:06:28,883 --> 00:06:31,723 I mean, have you ever seen anything as cute as that in your life? 91 00:06:31,763 --> 00:06:34,203 Aw!Come on, you kidding me? 92 00:06:34,243 --> 00:06:36,883 Aw! What are you like?! Ha-ha! 93 00:06:36,923 --> 00:06:40,163 You're joking, but they do that, don't they? 94 00:06:40,203 --> 00:06:42,923 Treat their pets like kids. 95 00:06:44,323 --> 00:06:47,203 What are you talking about? The gays. 96 00:06:47,243 --> 00:06:50,803 What Kieran said, it's displacement, I sup... 97 00:06:56,443 --> 00:06:57,723 KIERAN LAUGHS 98 00:06:57,763 --> 00:07:00,123 I think you've had enough to drink. 99 00:07:02,083 --> 00:07:03,683 Not enough, clearly. 100 00:07:06,283 --> 00:07:08,123 Don't mind her, she's a terrible rip. 101 00:07:10,963 --> 00:07:13,483 Are you all right? Why wouldn't I be? 102 00:07:13,523 --> 00:07:16,843 You look... Don't start in on me now. 103 00:07:18,723 --> 00:07:20,643 I was just asking how you are. 104 00:07:20,683 --> 00:07:22,483 Always the same. 105 00:07:22,523 --> 00:07:25,043 You go on and on at me. 106 00:07:31,803 --> 00:07:33,363 Sorry, can I...?Yeah. 107 00:07:35,443 --> 00:07:37,523 Ah, he's growing by the day, isn't he? 108 00:07:37,563 --> 00:07:40,363 Yeah. That's what babies tend to do. 109 00:07:42,243 --> 00:07:44,083 You all set for the service tomorrow? 110 00:07:45,163 --> 00:07:46,923 It's not the first time I've done it. 111 00:07:46,963 --> 00:07:49,363 No, it isn't. These are your people, after all. 112 00:07:49,403 --> 00:07:50,963 Your flock. 113 00:07:53,963 --> 00:07:55,443 Have you lot had a falling out? 114 00:07:57,163 --> 00:07:59,883 No. Why do you say that? 115 00:07:59,923 --> 00:08:01,283 No reason. 116 00:08:01,323 --> 00:08:04,123 I hope the food arrives before too long, I haven't eaten all day. 117 00:08:04,163 --> 00:08:06,243 God, is that all you think about? 118 00:08:06,283 --> 00:08:10,483 Listen, why don't you pop around the pub tomorrow before the christening? 119 00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:13,563 I won't have time.Just pop over. I have something for you. 120 00:08:13,603 --> 00:08:17,163 What is it?That'd be telling. 121 00:08:17,203 --> 00:08:19,403 PHONE RINGS Hello, there. 122 00:08:19,443 --> 00:08:21,123 Hang on a sec, I'll just pop out. 123 00:08:23,483 --> 00:08:25,083 He's so cute! 124 00:08:26,563 --> 00:08:28,603 He's got Lance's eyes. 125 00:08:28,643 --> 00:08:30,243 Do you really think so?Mm. 126 00:08:30,283 --> 00:08:32,083 He'll be a heartbreaker, so. 127 00:08:33,683 --> 00:08:36,963 Oh, he's just the cutest thing! 128 00:08:38,003 --> 00:08:41,123 And don't worry, I haven't told a soul. 129 00:08:41,163 --> 00:08:42,603 Haven't told a soul what? 130 00:08:44,243 --> 00:08:45,643 Go on, spit it out. 131 00:08:47,003 --> 00:08:49,243 Andrew?Hm?You can do it now. 132 00:08:50,443 --> 00:08:52,403 I'm just going to get another beer. 133 00:08:53,523 --> 00:08:55,923 Is anyone going to tell me what's going on? 134 00:08:58,603 --> 00:09:00,363 Wait! Wait, where's Peter? 135 00:09:01,523 --> 00:09:04,403 Well, we can't do this without Peter. 136 00:09:04,443 --> 00:09:06,323 I hear you, I hear you. 137 00:09:06,363 --> 00:09:09,043 Well, to be honest, I'd be worried if you weren't feeling like this, 138 00:09:09,083 --> 00:09:11,123 because the first couple of years are... 139 00:09:12,403 --> 00:09:15,283 Let's grab a coffee in the morning and we can talk it through. 140 00:09:15,323 --> 00:09:16,803 Are you going to be OK tonight? 141 00:09:18,163 --> 00:09:20,243 Call me if you need anything. 142 00:09:20,283 --> 00:09:22,203 I'll see you then. 143 00:09:22,243 --> 00:09:24,483 OK. Yeah. Go easy. 144 00:09:30,883 --> 00:09:32,843 Er...you've been summoned. 145 00:09:32,883 --> 00:09:34,803 HE SIGHS 146 00:09:34,843 --> 00:09:37,163 Yeah. Yeah, I'm coming. 147 00:09:40,483 --> 00:09:42,323 Don't you think you should slow down? 148 00:09:44,123 --> 00:09:46,723 That's rich, coming from you. 149 00:09:46,763 --> 00:09:49,483 Yeah, I suppose it is. 150 00:09:51,603 --> 00:09:54,883 You've barely looked at me since you got here. 151 00:09:54,923 --> 00:09:58,603 Go back in there and be with your husband. 152 00:10:02,123 --> 00:10:04,643 Do it for your family, then. 153 00:10:17,963 --> 00:10:22,523 Having a party, are you? No, I'm just hungry.Right, yeah. 154 00:10:27,403 --> 00:10:30,763 There's an exhibition at the college. For my photographs. 155 00:10:30,803 --> 00:10:34,803 You know, it would be a laugh. If you wanted to... No. 156 00:10:34,843 --> 00:10:36,123 Right. 157 00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:48,283 And I want the change. Yeah. Yeah. 158 00:10:53,123 --> 00:10:55,563 Too many pockets! Do you remember Willy? 159 00:10:55,603 --> 00:10:59,123 One day he was driving along - remember Willy, two farms down? - 160 00:10:59,163 --> 00:11:03,523 anyway, he sees in the field this bale, you know, hay, 161 00:11:03,563 --> 00:11:05,923 and it's a great, big, oversized bale. 162 00:11:05,963 --> 00:11:07,443 Anyway, it started rolling, y'know? 163 00:11:07,483 --> 00:11:09,483 There's this house at the bottom of the field. 164 00:11:09,523 --> 00:11:11,683 You know, posh place, a holiday home - with a pool. 165 00:11:11,723 --> 00:11:13,523 Anyway, the bale is rolling down. 166 00:11:13,563 --> 00:11:15,803 Willy jumps up, manages to catch up with it - 167 00:11:15,843 --> 00:11:17,883 cos he can see where this is going, 168 00:11:17,923 --> 00:11:21,043 sees two black eyes staring back at him. 169 00:11:21,083 --> 00:11:24,643 It was Bella the cow! Was in the bale! 170 00:11:24,683 --> 00:11:26,163 She said it was just a matter 171 00:11:26,203 --> 00:11:29,123 of form filling and jumping through a few hoops. 172 00:11:29,163 --> 00:11:32,443 And Kieran's going to take care of the legal proceedings, I presume? 173 00:11:32,483 --> 00:11:34,363 Is this Cois Dara? 174 00:11:34,403 --> 00:11:40,163 Isn't Kieran's expertise in American law? Right?Right. 175 00:11:40,203 --> 00:11:42,563 But that's no use here. 176 00:11:42,603 --> 00:11:44,523 And if it all goes smoothly, 177 00:11:44,563 --> 00:11:46,723 how long will it take for the money to come through? 178 00:11:46,763 --> 00:11:50,163 Oh, it could take anything from three to six months, if we're lucky, 179 00:11:50,203 --> 00:11:52,523 and then, if all goes to plan, the builders move in, 180 00:11:52,563 --> 00:11:55,403 make sure it's structurally sound and then we go from there. 181 00:11:55,443 --> 00:11:57,243 That sounds great. Mm-hm. 182 00:11:57,283 --> 00:11:58,883 What are you guys talking about? 183 00:11:58,923 --> 00:12:01,683 Oh, looks like the insurance is going to pay out on the fire 184 00:12:01,723 --> 00:12:04,203 at Cois Dara. You don't know that yet. 185 00:12:04,243 --> 00:12:06,643 Let's just say we're quietly confident. 186 00:12:06,683 --> 00:12:09,603 I don't know why I didn't set fire to the place myself. 187 00:12:11,803 --> 00:12:15,203 So you're, er, you're definitely staying on, then?Yeah. 188 00:12:15,243 --> 00:12:17,883 Talk about divine intervention. 189 00:12:17,923 --> 00:12:22,003 Yeah, the Lord certainly works in mysterious ways, doesn't he? 190 00:12:26,923 --> 00:12:31,443 Ah, well, that's my retirement plans scuppered. 191 00:12:31,483 --> 00:12:34,883 A hostile takeover by an American corporation. 192 00:12:34,923 --> 00:12:37,563 Looks set to be a fine day tomorrow. 193 00:12:37,603 --> 00:12:41,523 All the family together. The way it should be. 194 00:12:41,563 --> 00:12:45,043 Keep Kathleen away - is that what you're trying to tell me? 195 00:12:45,083 --> 00:12:48,723 Loud and clear.That woman... That woman is my mother. 196 00:12:51,683 --> 00:12:53,003 You've made your point. 197 00:12:53,043 --> 00:12:56,123 Well, she made a point of making me feel very welcome in her family. 198 00:12:56,163 --> 00:12:57,683 My family. 199 00:12:57,723 --> 00:13:02,563 Oh. Yeah. I'm even going to take a trip to Spain to meet the others. 200 00:13:02,603 --> 00:13:04,603 Oh. 201 00:13:04,643 --> 00:13:08,403 So you know about the other one, I presume? 202 00:13:10,123 --> 00:13:12,723 What other one? 203 00:13:12,763 --> 00:13:16,523 Kathleen had another child when you were born. 204 00:13:21,843 --> 00:13:23,803 She had twins. 205 00:13:31,403 --> 00:13:32,563 Food! 206 00:13:32,603 --> 00:13:34,243 GLASS CLINKS 207 00:13:34,283 --> 00:13:36,363 OK. Sorry - can I just, erm, 208 00:13:36,403 --> 00:13:39,563 say a few words on behalf of Bernie and I? 209 00:13:39,603 --> 00:13:41,483 First of all, thanks for coming. 210 00:13:41,523 --> 00:13:43,843 MUSIC PLAYS ON RADIO Eileen, shut that thing down. 211 00:13:43,883 --> 00:13:45,523 Sorry. Sorry. 212 00:13:45,563 --> 00:13:46,963 MUSIC STOPS 213 00:13:47,003 --> 00:13:50,643 Yeah. OK. Erm, just want to say 214 00:13:50,683 --> 00:13:55,203 that we've asked Eileen and Peter to be Godparents. 215 00:13:55,243 --> 00:13:59,723 That's great, Peter, congratulations. 216 00:13:59,763 --> 00:14:01,443 And they both agreed, 217 00:14:01,483 --> 00:14:04,483 which is great for us because that's another two baby-sitters 218 00:14:04,523 --> 00:14:08,963 to add to the list and, erm... The name? 219 00:14:09,003 --> 00:14:11,483 We've finally settled on a name. 220 00:14:11,523 --> 00:14:17,123 Everyone, meet Lance Padraig Byrne. 221 00:14:17,163 --> 00:14:19,003 ALL: Aww! 222 00:14:19,043 --> 00:14:22,603 Aw, son, come here to me. I'm so touched by that. 223 00:14:22,643 --> 00:14:27,523 To Lance Padraig Byrne. ALL: To Lance Padraig Byrne! 224 00:14:27,563 --> 00:14:30,723 To Lance Padraig Byrne. 225 00:14:37,283 --> 00:14:41,083 He's really good with kids, isn't he? Yes. 226 00:14:41,123 --> 00:14:44,163 He's just amazing! 227 00:14:44,203 --> 00:14:48,283 So, Godmother no less? How did you wrangle that? 228 00:14:48,323 --> 00:14:52,163 I didn't wrangle anything. I was asked. And Padraig? 229 00:14:52,203 --> 00:14:56,043 I mean, you should have let that name die with him. 230 00:14:56,083 --> 00:14:58,243 Mam, that is an awful thing to say. 231 00:14:58,283 --> 00:15:01,763 I'm just saying what everyone is thinking.No. You're not. 232 00:15:01,803 --> 00:15:04,163 Why don't you get a glass of water, Mum? 233 00:15:09,083 --> 00:15:11,203 She better not be like this tomorrow. 234 00:15:11,243 --> 00:15:13,523 She won't, she'll be fine. She'll be fine. 235 00:15:13,563 --> 00:15:15,923 Can you go make sure she gets some water? 236 00:15:18,323 --> 00:15:22,083 Any wonder I moved halfway across the world? 237 00:15:33,803 --> 00:15:35,163 I can't help myself. 238 00:15:35,203 --> 00:15:38,043 Won't be content until I'm the size of a house. 239 00:15:39,763 --> 00:15:43,003 Nobody wants an obese wife, Bernadette. 240 00:15:43,043 --> 00:15:44,843 You've just had your third child. 241 00:15:44,883 --> 00:15:47,443 Now's the time to start taking care of yourself, 242 00:15:47,483 --> 00:15:50,203 not letting everything sink south. 243 00:15:50,243 --> 00:15:52,843 Have you seen Dermott? 244 00:15:52,883 --> 00:15:55,363 I think he left.Oh. 245 00:15:57,283 --> 00:16:00,243 You know I didn't want him involved in the christening, don't you? 246 00:16:00,283 --> 00:16:02,883 Didn't Andrew tell you? 247 00:16:02,923 --> 00:16:05,123 Well, Dermott's family. 248 00:16:05,163 --> 00:16:08,283 His feelings would have been hurt if he'd been excluded. 249 00:16:08,323 --> 00:16:10,283 And what about my feelings? 250 00:16:10,323 --> 00:16:12,963 Oh, why, you're being too sensitive. 251 00:16:13,003 --> 00:16:14,803 You just called me fat. 252 00:16:14,843 --> 00:16:17,323 Now, nobody called you fat. 253 00:16:17,363 --> 00:16:22,243 I said you must take care of yourself. That's good advice. 254 00:16:22,283 --> 00:16:24,723 Nobody likes a glutton. 255 00:16:43,323 --> 00:16:44,883 PHONE RINGS 256 00:16:44,923 --> 00:16:48,803 Doug, it's me. Those photos on Adeen's phone that went to the lab, 257 00:16:48,843 --> 00:16:51,323 I need you to chase them up for me. 258 00:16:51,363 --> 00:16:53,603 Just let me know when you get this. 259 00:16:58,043 --> 00:16:59,723 Do you think I'm fat? 260 00:17:01,923 --> 00:17:03,803 You've just had a baby. 261 00:17:05,323 --> 00:17:07,083 Is that why you won't touch me? 262 00:17:07,123 --> 00:17:09,163 You're being stupid now, Bernie. 263 00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:11,843 So what is it? 264 00:17:14,523 --> 00:17:16,003 I'm tired. 265 00:17:19,523 --> 00:17:21,843 I told Agnes. I told her that I didn't want Dermott, 266 00:17:21,883 --> 00:17:23,203 that I wanted Father Flynn. 267 00:17:23,243 --> 00:17:25,363 It's our day. Why do we have to listen to her? 268 00:17:25,403 --> 00:17:28,643 Because we do. And what's Dermott ever done to you? 269 00:17:28,683 --> 00:17:30,883 Except deliver your baby. 270 00:17:30,923 --> 00:17:32,323 OUR baby. 271 00:17:40,643 --> 00:17:41,963 MUSIC BLARES ON RADIO 272 00:17:42,003 --> 00:17:44,563 You see, I told you you'd get the hang of it. 273 00:17:44,603 --> 00:17:47,563 I wasn't born in the Dark Ages, Eileen. 274 00:17:47,603 --> 00:17:51,683 Does it always have to be Daniel O'Donnell? 275 00:17:51,723 --> 00:17:53,883 Oh, no, no, it doesn't. 276 00:17:53,923 --> 00:17:56,923 Sure, I have Mary Black in here too, if you'd prefer. 277 00:17:56,963 --> 00:17:59,763 PHONE RINGS 278 00:17:59,803 --> 00:18:01,763 MUSIC STOPS 279 00:18:05,323 --> 00:18:07,003 Hello? 280 00:18:07,043 --> 00:18:08,443 Oh, Pat. 281 00:18:11,043 --> 00:18:14,283 Oh, I'm very sorry. Is there's anything I can do? 282 00:18:16,083 --> 00:18:18,083 He was a good man. 283 00:18:19,323 --> 00:18:23,163 Oh, no, no, no, don't even think on it, no. 284 00:18:23,203 --> 00:18:25,483 Well, listen, thanks for letting us know, 285 00:18:25,523 --> 00:18:28,083 and, er, take care now. God bless. 286 00:18:30,043 --> 00:18:33,763 That was Pat Donoghue. Jim went and died in the night. 287 00:18:33,803 --> 00:18:37,483 They were married for years. God. The poor woman. 288 00:18:37,523 --> 00:18:39,643 Oh, forget her, what about the cake? 289 00:18:39,683 --> 00:18:43,043 Mam!Well, she was supposed to drop it here this morning. 290 00:18:43,083 --> 00:18:46,083 Mam, her husband has just passed! 291 00:18:46,123 --> 00:18:49,563 I don't think christening cake is at the top of her priorities right now. 292 00:18:49,603 --> 00:18:52,483 Well, the world goes on turning, Eileen. 293 00:18:52,523 --> 00:18:55,523 If the husband's dead, well, the husband's dead. 294 00:18:55,563 --> 00:18:58,123 People still expect cake. 295 00:19:00,243 --> 00:19:02,443 MUSIC RESUMES 296 00:19:02,483 --> 00:19:04,443 Isn't that lovely? 297 00:19:10,083 --> 00:19:12,803 All right? You can see New York from here. 298 00:19:12,843 --> 00:19:15,923 Ah, right. Look closely you'll see the Statue of Liberty. 299 00:19:15,963 --> 00:19:18,243 Ah-ha! Very small, of course. Yeah. I'm going to pop down 300 00:19:18,283 --> 00:19:20,483 to the travel agents. What do you want to do that for? 301 00:19:20,523 --> 00:19:23,083 Well, they're showing that the flights are all booked online. 302 00:19:23,123 --> 00:19:24,723 Well, just book a different flight. 303 00:19:24,763 --> 00:19:27,443 The computer's playing up, got no Wi-Fi. I'll come with you.No, no. 304 00:19:27,483 --> 00:19:28,603 You know what Tommy's like - 305 00:19:28,643 --> 00:19:31,163 takes him six hours just to get in the car. I'll be straight back. 306 00:19:31,203 --> 00:19:32,643 We'll take him down the beach later. 307 00:19:32,683 --> 00:19:35,603 Yeah. Sounds good to me. Love yer.Love you. 308 00:20:14,243 --> 00:20:18,843 All you have to do is drive there and drive back. 309 00:20:18,883 --> 00:20:21,043 Andrew's not going anywhere. 310 00:20:24,563 --> 00:20:27,163 So tell me, Bernadette, how do you feel about having 311 00:20:27,203 --> 00:20:29,843 a christening with no christening cake? 312 00:20:29,883 --> 00:20:33,723 A cake you've already paid for, I might add. 313 00:20:33,763 --> 00:20:37,163 Hm? Yes, well, conversation closed. 314 00:20:37,203 --> 00:20:40,243 Look, I can go with you.No. 315 00:20:41,403 --> 00:20:43,083 Dad, you have to stay. 316 00:20:43,123 --> 00:20:45,803 Adeen, can you just go up and get ready, please? 317 00:20:50,363 --> 00:20:52,043 Well, that's settled. 318 00:20:57,803 --> 00:21:00,883 And, er, you promise you'll look in on Lady? 319 00:21:00,923 --> 00:21:03,243 I said I would. Now, go. 320 00:21:15,163 --> 00:21:16,883 The presents are for the twins. 321 00:21:16,923 --> 00:21:19,083 Mum said I wasn't allowed any presents. 322 00:21:19,123 --> 00:21:20,603 You've had enough treats, you. 323 00:21:20,643 --> 00:21:23,923 I swear he's going to turn into an ice cream cone 324 00:21:23,963 --> 00:21:26,003 one of these days, you watch. 325 00:21:26,043 --> 00:21:27,723 What time's your flight home? 326 00:21:27,763 --> 00:21:30,403 Erm, Alfie's just gone into town to book the flights. 327 00:21:30,443 --> 00:21:32,883 We tried to get one for the morning but they were fully booked. 328 00:21:38,203 --> 00:21:40,163 When you coming back? 329 00:21:40,203 --> 00:21:42,403 Soon. 330 00:21:42,443 --> 00:21:43,563 Sugar? 331 00:21:45,323 --> 00:21:47,083 One, please. 332 00:21:50,123 --> 00:21:52,923 So, erm, you never lived here, then? 333 00:21:52,963 --> 00:21:56,683 No. Spent a lot of time here, though. 334 00:21:56,723 --> 00:21:59,363 It belonged to Peter's mother. My grandmother. 335 00:22:02,163 --> 00:22:03,323 Well... 336 00:22:05,963 --> 00:22:08,243 Just another woman, now, I suppose. 337 00:22:20,603 --> 00:22:23,123 Why didn't you tell me I had a sister? 338 00:22:26,203 --> 00:22:28,163 Tommy, we're just popping outside. 339 00:22:37,083 --> 00:22:38,363 Here. 340 00:22:40,603 --> 00:22:43,483 You can see the time of birth. 341 00:22:43,523 --> 00:22:46,723 Normally there's only a date. Except when there's a twin. 342 00:22:46,763 --> 00:22:49,843 Where did you get this? Does it matter?No, it doesn't... 343 00:22:49,883 --> 00:22:52,163 but it's not as if I wasn't going to tell you. 344 00:22:52,203 --> 00:22:53,843 Well, that's all right, then(!) 345 00:22:57,043 --> 00:23:00,683 Is she still alive? Zoe? Of course she is. 346 00:23:00,723 --> 00:23:02,763 So why didn't you tell me? 347 00:23:02,803 --> 00:23:05,123 Because I didn't want you to feel rejected. 348 00:23:05,163 --> 00:23:08,363 What can I say? I guess you get used to it. 349 00:23:08,403 --> 00:23:10,443 Look, I've messed up again. 350 00:23:10,483 --> 00:23:14,683 I'm not a saint, Dermott. I'm not like you. 351 00:23:14,723 --> 00:23:17,843 This is good news. I'm tired, Kathleen. 352 00:23:19,283 --> 00:23:21,603 I am exhausted... 353 00:23:21,643 --> 00:23:25,003 and every time I believe I've got it, 354 00:23:25,043 --> 00:23:27,523 you just pull the rug from under me. 355 00:23:27,563 --> 00:23:30,323 Again and again... PHONE RINGS 356 00:23:40,203 --> 00:23:43,923 What's she like?Zoe? 357 00:23:43,963 --> 00:23:47,723 She's beautiful. A proper stunner. 358 00:23:47,763 --> 00:23:49,723 Gobby, mind. Like me. 359 00:23:51,603 --> 00:23:57,403 She lives in Spain, she's got a fiance and she's doing well. 360 00:23:57,443 --> 00:24:00,523 She's doing really well. Does she know about me? 361 00:24:02,363 --> 00:24:03,603 No. 362 00:24:04,923 --> 00:24:08,923 So, we move at your pace. Whatever you want to do. 363 00:24:08,963 --> 00:24:11,683 I'll take my lead from you. I'm only going to ask you this once, 364 00:24:11,723 --> 00:24:15,523 Kathleen, and I need the truth from you. Do you understand me?Yeah. 365 00:24:18,883 --> 00:24:21,163 Is there anything else I don't know? 366 00:24:24,763 --> 00:24:26,123 No. 367 00:24:26,163 --> 00:24:28,363 No, nothing. 368 00:24:28,403 --> 00:24:30,883 I think the sooner you leave, the better. 369 00:24:33,843 --> 00:24:37,123 Don't you want to say goodbye to Tommy first?Not at the moment, no. 370 00:24:37,163 --> 00:24:39,283 I need some space to think. 371 00:24:39,323 --> 00:24:40,723 To breathe. 372 00:25:08,963 --> 00:25:10,283 Are you lost? 373 00:25:24,963 --> 00:25:26,563 So, do you know this woman? 374 00:25:26,603 --> 00:25:29,683 This, uh, what's her name, Pat what-do-you-call-her? 375 00:25:29,723 --> 00:25:33,883 Donoghue. You know who she is. She used to run that Sunday School. 376 00:25:33,923 --> 00:25:35,563 Her? 377 00:25:35,603 --> 00:25:38,523 Oh, God, how is she still alive? She was evil, that woman. 378 00:25:38,563 --> 00:25:40,883 Yeah, only because you and me drove her to distraction. 379 00:25:40,923 --> 00:25:43,323 Hey, whatever I did, my hand was forced, I'm sure. 380 00:25:43,363 --> 00:25:45,083 Yeah, like it wasn't your idea 381 00:25:45,123 --> 00:25:48,123 to put that dead fish behind the skirting board. 382 00:25:48,163 --> 00:25:50,843 D'you remember? You, me and Cian Colman. 383 00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:53,923 Yeah, Cian Colman. Hey, what's he up to these days? 384 00:25:53,963 --> 00:25:57,443 Marriage. Kids. Just back from two weeks in Tenerife. 385 00:25:57,483 --> 00:26:01,363 Marriage, mortgage, maternity. Of course. 386 00:26:01,403 --> 00:26:03,843 Sure, what else would you be doing? 387 00:26:07,283 --> 00:26:08,843 It is this way. 388 00:26:39,043 --> 00:26:41,083 HE KNOCKS 389 00:26:48,083 --> 00:26:52,363 Mrs Donoghue. It's Andrew, Agnes' grandson. 390 00:26:52,403 --> 00:26:56,003 You remember Kieran? We're so sorry for your loss. 391 00:26:56,043 --> 00:26:58,003 It wasn't peaceful when he went. 392 00:26:58,043 --> 00:27:00,803 He was in agony, crying out for mercy. 393 00:27:04,043 --> 00:27:07,003 So, do you think we could grab that cake? 394 00:27:07,043 --> 00:27:08,283 The cake? 395 00:27:09,483 --> 00:27:11,003 Sorry to ask. 396 00:27:12,363 --> 00:27:14,203 Agnes sent you, did she? 397 00:27:17,003 --> 00:27:20,283 A cute hoor. Never did change. 398 00:27:24,203 --> 00:27:29,243 THEY LAUGH 399 00:27:29,283 --> 00:27:31,163 Woohoo! 400 00:27:31,203 --> 00:27:34,323 Out the gab with the Gods. 401 00:27:34,363 --> 00:27:37,683 Is this going to take long? I'm coming, I'm coming. 402 00:27:37,723 --> 00:27:39,603 I found them the other night 403 00:27:39,643 --> 00:27:42,003 when I was sorting through a few things. 404 00:27:42,043 --> 00:27:43,803 Are you going to have look? 405 00:27:47,683 --> 00:27:50,803 They're yours. Baby teeth. 406 00:27:52,443 --> 00:27:55,163 I suppose you don't remember the fuss you made? 407 00:27:55,203 --> 00:27:58,163 How you wouldn't go to sleep because you didn't want the tooth fairy 408 00:27:58,203 --> 00:28:01,003 to take them away. 409 00:28:01,043 --> 00:28:02,683 You called me here for this? 410 00:28:02,723 --> 00:28:05,923 Yeah, I thought you'd be happy, I don't know... 411 00:28:05,963 --> 00:28:09,963 curious at least. What's gotten into you?Nothing. 412 00:28:10,003 --> 00:28:12,803 There's something you're not telling me about and I'm growing tired. 413 00:28:12,843 --> 00:28:16,083 Tired of your attitude. My attitude?Yes, your attitude. 414 00:28:16,123 --> 00:28:19,203 It's all monosyllabics. All mood and darkness - 415 00:28:19,243 --> 00:28:21,403 and I want to know why. 416 00:28:21,443 --> 00:28:23,523 I'm very sorry to have disappointed you. 417 00:28:23,563 --> 00:28:26,243 Anya, could you go on your break, please?Yeah. 418 00:28:30,843 --> 00:28:33,883 You haven't disappointed me. How could you say that? 419 00:28:33,923 --> 00:28:35,563 But you can't... 420 00:28:35,603 --> 00:28:39,083 You're not much of a priest if you can't talk to your old man 421 00:28:39,123 --> 00:28:42,683 about what's going on. Now, tell me. 422 00:28:42,723 --> 00:28:45,243 Dermott, talk to me.Get off me! 423 00:28:45,283 --> 00:28:47,043 No, I won't. Not until you tell me. 424 00:28:47,083 --> 00:28:49,763 Get off me! You're not my da! 425 00:28:51,803 --> 00:28:53,723 And Iris wasn't my mother! 426 00:28:59,603 --> 00:29:02,603 Why are you saying this? Dermott? 427 00:29:04,803 --> 00:29:06,403 Because it's true. 428 00:29:08,043 --> 00:29:09,323 THEY CHUCKLE 429 00:29:10,883 --> 00:29:13,523 PHONE RINGS Oh. It's Gran. It's in my pocket. 430 00:29:13,563 --> 00:29:16,323 I'll get it. Whoa! What are you doing? 431 00:29:16,363 --> 00:29:17,923 What? 432 00:29:17,963 --> 00:29:20,763 It's Bernie, it's all right, I've got it. 433 00:29:23,683 --> 00:29:24,963 TYRE EXPLODES 434 00:29:39,043 --> 00:29:40,963 It's all been a lie. 435 00:29:41,003 --> 00:29:44,643 Your life, my life. She's been laughing at us the whole time. 436 00:29:44,683 --> 00:29:48,123 Who's been laughing? Agnes. The whole time she's known. 437 00:29:48,163 --> 00:29:50,123 She went to London to see Iris. 438 00:29:50,163 --> 00:29:52,483 Ma. Iris was your ma. 439 00:29:52,523 --> 00:29:56,963 Iris lost your child in London and she brought me back. 440 00:29:57,003 --> 00:30:00,563 What a miracle, I was, eh? And Kathleen Moon... 441 00:30:03,243 --> 00:30:07,443 What? Why do you think she has been here this whole time? 442 00:30:07,483 --> 00:30:11,243 What are you talking about? She's my mother. Not Iris. 443 00:30:21,723 --> 00:30:24,643 Mammy! You're drunk. I'm not.Mammy! 444 00:30:24,683 --> 00:30:26,403 I'm not your mammy. 445 00:30:28,443 --> 00:30:30,963 Dermott, who's been telling you all this? 446 00:30:31,003 --> 00:30:34,803 Lance. Some last prick of conscience before he went to the grave, 447 00:30:34,843 --> 00:30:37,563 I don't know. She stole me. 448 00:30:37,603 --> 00:30:40,403 Iris is nothing but a thief and a drunk. 449 00:30:40,443 --> 00:30:43,363 Now, you watch your mouth, boy. And you... 450 00:30:46,763 --> 00:30:49,323 You're just a man I shared a house with - 451 00:30:49,363 --> 00:30:53,083 and here we are, 18 years later, 452 00:30:53,123 --> 00:30:55,363 not so much as a drop of drink on you, 453 00:30:55,403 --> 00:30:58,443 with your sanctimonious, holier than thou...Stop! 454 00:30:58,483 --> 00:31:01,963 Do you know the irony of all this is it needn't have been. 455 00:31:02,003 --> 00:31:04,683 You were mourning a woman you didn't even know. 456 00:31:04,723 --> 00:31:08,163 You have spent the past 30 years bringing up a child 457 00:31:08,203 --> 00:31:10,803 that wasn't even yours. 458 00:31:10,843 --> 00:31:15,043 Your life and everything in it - your drinking, your sobriety, me - 459 00:31:15,083 --> 00:31:18,483 it's just not true. None of it is true. 460 00:31:18,523 --> 00:31:20,163 You need to go to church. 461 00:31:20,203 --> 00:31:22,883 Oh, I'll go! I'll go and I'll put on a good show! 462 00:31:22,923 --> 00:31:24,843 You don't have to worry about me! 463 00:31:26,363 --> 00:31:27,763 Not any more. 464 00:31:30,003 --> 00:31:33,603 Why don't you pour yourself a drink, there? You deserve one. 465 00:31:54,763 --> 00:31:57,123 Dermott. Save me! 466 00:31:57,163 --> 00:31:58,563 No. 467 00:32:37,963 --> 00:32:39,923 Look at you, all dolled up. 468 00:32:39,963 --> 00:32:41,923 Is that jam on your jacket? 469 00:32:43,363 --> 00:32:46,123 They were in your deleted folder. 470 00:32:46,163 --> 00:32:48,483 What were they doing there? I didn't delete them. 471 00:32:48,523 --> 00:32:50,003 You were shooting a baby out of you, 472 00:32:50,043 --> 00:32:53,283 how do you know what you were doing? I blew them up. I'm nice that way. 473 00:32:53,323 --> 00:32:57,003 Will you send them to my private e-mail? You know it, don't you? 474 00:32:57,043 --> 00:33:00,203 Listen, if I had six months holidays I wouldn't be worried about work. 475 00:33:00,243 --> 00:33:02,483 It's called maternity leave, Doug. 476 00:33:02,523 --> 00:33:04,403 Why do you want them, anyway? 477 00:33:04,443 --> 00:33:07,003 Because I do. I'll see you later. 478 00:33:08,443 --> 00:33:09,483 OK. 479 00:33:34,603 --> 00:33:37,883 We're nearly ready to go. 480 00:33:37,923 --> 00:33:39,563 How is she? 481 00:33:39,603 --> 00:33:41,723 Needed a mother's touch, is all. 482 00:33:43,843 --> 00:33:48,483 I don't want a repeat of last night, do you understand me? 483 00:33:48,523 --> 00:33:49,883 I didn't do anything. 484 00:33:49,923 --> 00:33:51,523 Oh, Roisin, 485 00:33:51,563 --> 00:33:55,163 I grew tired of that line by the time you were 14. 486 00:34:00,003 --> 00:34:04,483 I won't be drinking. Nobody minds you taking a drink. 487 00:34:04,523 --> 00:34:06,403 Just control yourself. 488 00:34:09,083 --> 00:34:12,883 After all, there was nothing to celebrate when Andrew was born, 489 00:34:12,923 --> 00:34:14,323 was there? 490 00:34:16,363 --> 00:34:18,323 So, he deserves this? 491 00:34:27,483 --> 00:34:29,443 ENGINE REVS 492 00:34:35,163 --> 00:34:36,763 Argh. Here. 493 00:34:36,803 --> 00:34:39,163 I can't get any signal. 494 00:34:39,203 --> 00:34:42,563 Don't even think about laughing, Kieran.I'm not. 495 00:34:42,603 --> 00:34:44,403 What are we going to do? 496 00:34:47,443 --> 00:34:49,963 You're an idiot. There's a spare tyre, 497 00:34:50,003 --> 00:34:52,963 but we're never going to get it on unless we get it this thing out. 498 00:34:53,003 --> 00:34:55,683 Look, don't panic. We'll wait here by the road and when a car comes, 499 00:34:55,723 --> 00:34:57,403 we'll just flag it down. 500 00:34:59,563 --> 00:35:01,603 I hope you know this is your fault. 501 00:35:02,763 --> 00:35:04,403 How is this my fault? 502 00:35:04,443 --> 00:35:07,163 You swan in here, like something out of a JD Salinger novel 503 00:35:07,203 --> 00:35:08,963 and cause havoc. 504 00:35:11,203 --> 00:35:13,243 Yeah, I know who JD Salinger is. 505 00:35:15,443 --> 00:35:18,683 So, er, what am I, one of those phoneys? 506 00:35:24,043 --> 00:35:25,243 Well? 507 00:35:26,723 --> 00:35:28,443 What havoc have I caused? 508 00:35:29,843 --> 00:35:31,043 To me. 509 00:35:33,443 --> 00:35:35,243 You've caused havoc to me. 510 00:35:49,123 --> 00:35:51,323 When you say you don't feel right...? 511 00:35:53,723 --> 00:35:55,323 Seeing things. 512 00:35:58,083 --> 00:36:00,283 Things that aren't really there. 513 00:36:01,403 --> 00:36:03,283 Headaches... 514 00:36:04,403 --> 00:36:05,963 These crippling, awful headaches. 515 00:36:06,003 --> 00:36:09,043 Well, often these are simply unwanted side effects 516 00:36:09,083 --> 00:36:12,683 of living with a brain tumour. Yeah, I know all about that, Doctor. 517 00:36:12,723 --> 00:36:16,443 Between you lot and the internet I'm practically qualified myself. 518 00:36:18,923 --> 00:36:21,963 But...my check-up's not for several months. 519 00:36:24,763 --> 00:36:27,563 I thought I'd been given a second chance, you know? 520 00:36:29,483 --> 00:36:32,643 And now...in my head... 521 00:36:37,323 --> 00:36:40,763 Do you think people get third chances? 522 00:36:43,723 --> 00:36:45,443 I dunno if they do... 523 00:36:45,483 --> 00:36:48,203 Look, given the severity of your symptoms and your history, 524 00:36:48,243 --> 00:36:52,163 it might be prudent to run a fresh scan, yeah? See where we are. 525 00:36:53,923 --> 00:36:56,283 Yeah, that'd be... 526 00:36:56,323 --> 00:36:58,283 Yeah, thank you. Thank you, Doc. 527 00:37:00,003 --> 00:37:02,363 'This is Alfie Moon. Can't get to the phone right now, 528 00:37:02,403 --> 00:37:04,203 'but please leave a message after the tone.' 529 00:37:04,243 --> 00:37:06,603 Alfie, Where are you? 530 00:37:06,643 --> 00:37:10,443 Look, we need to book a flight. Day or night, we just need to go. 531 00:37:14,243 --> 00:37:17,123 Where did you get these from? Dermott gave them to me. 532 00:37:19,523 --> 00:37:21,483 Saint Apo...Apollonia? 533 00:37:21,523 --> 00:37:25,883 Saint Apollonia. They beat her up and knocked her teeth out. 534 00:37:25,923 --> 00:37:28,403 Tommy, I don't think you should be playing with these. 535 00:37:28,443 --> 00:37:32,043 Dermott said if you don't believe then you go to hell. 536 00:37:32,083 --> 00:37:33,963 That's Saint Zoe. 537 00:37:38,923 --> 00:37:42,243 "Rejecting the food offered to the Gods, she was tortured 538 00:37:42,283 --> 00:37:44,603 "and roasted to death in a furnace." 539 00:37:46,963 --> 00:37:50,923 Tommy, you don't need to be thinking about heaven or hell, all right? 540 00:37:50,963 --> 00:37:53,243 Dermott said I do. 541 00:37:56,443 --> 00:37:58,923 So, what happens when you die? 542 00:38:02,123 --> 00:38:04,843 Mum? What happens when you die? 543 00:38:12,323 --> 00:38:14,203 Welcome. 544 00:38:14,243 --> 00:38:17,803 Hello. Lovely to see you, thank you for coming. 545 00:38:17,843 --> 00:38:19,643 Thank you so much for coming. 546 00:38:30,283 --> 00:38:34,163 Andrew's not back. Bernie's having kittens over there. 547 00:38:37,363 --> 00:38:40,043 She would have loved all this today. 548 00:38:44,843 --> 00:38:47,403 Come on, we'll go inside, will we? 549 00:38:47,443 --> 00:38:50,763 You might have everyone else fooled but you don't fool me. 550 00:38:52,963 --> 00:38:55,683 Padraig is a good man. 551 00:38:55,723 --> 00:38:57,283 Make it work. 552 00:38:59,043 --> 00:39:00,923 What would you know about it? 553 00:39:02,283 --> 00:39:06,643 Just take my advice. Don't end up like me. 554 00:39:12,923 --> 00:39:16,563 You can't have a christening without the father of the baby 555 00:39:16,603 --> 00:39:18,723 or the priest. 556 00:39:18,763 --> 00:39:20,203 Where's Peter? 557 00:39:22,283 --> 00:39:24,083 They'll be here. 558 00:39:25,883 --> 00:39:27,963 ZIP FASTENS 559 00:39:46,003 --> 00:39:47,763 I can do it myself. 560 00:39:58,003 --> 00:40:01,563 VEHICLE APPROACHES 561 00:40:06,763 --> 00:40:08,443 What if something has happened? 562 00:40:08,483 --> 00:40:12,043 They'll have got caught in traffic. Traffic? In Redwater? 563 00:40:14,963 --> 00:40:17,083 Where were you? 564 00:40:17,123 --> 00:40:20,083 I was reading a parishioner's last rites. 565 00:40:20,123 --> 00:40:22,003 Oh. 566 00:40:23,643 --> 00:40:25,083 Kathleen sends her love. 567 00:40:27,923 --> 00:40:30,043 Where the hell have you been? 568 00:40:30,083 --> 00:40:32,363 I went to get your cake, the cake you wanted. 569 00:40:32,403 --> 00:40:34,523 And you said you'd be back.I am. 570 00:40:34,563 --> 00:40:37,083 What happened? We had a blowout, Gran. 571 00:40:37,123 --> 00:40:39,603 Oh... A blowout?But we're fine. 572 00:40:39,643 --> 00:40:43,963 Come on, everyone inside. Come on, move. You - baby wipes. 573 00:40:44,003 --> 00:40:45,483 Get cleaned up. 574 00:40:53,723 --> 00:40:56,043 Do you want to tell me what you've done? 575 00:40:57,483 --> 00:41:00,483 What I do or what I don't do has got nothing to do with you. 576 00:41:01,803 --> 00:41:03,283 Of course. Sorry. 577 00:41:05,963 --> 00:41:07,523 Occupational hazard. 578 00:41:13,243 --> 00:41:16,323 For God said, "Honour your father and mother 579 00:41:16,363 --> 00:41:22,323 "and anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death." 580 00:41:26,883 --> 00:41:29,643 No pressure, then. CHUCKLING 581 00:41:34,363 --> 00:41:37,643 Today, baby Lance Padraig Byrne becomes a part of a family. 582 00:41:39,923 --> 00:41:45,283 What does that mean, that one simple word, family? 583 00:41:45,323 --> 00:41:49,483 Is it love? Comfort? Protection? 584 00:41:49,523 --> 00:41:51,683 It's all of those things. 585 00:41:51,723 --> 00:41:53,683 It's also sacrifice. 586 00:41:53,723 --> 00:41:56,683 I ask you here today to think about, 587 00:41:56,723 --> 00:41:59,203 and to pray for those who are less fortunate, 588 00:41:59,243 --> 00:42:01,243 for those who don't know their families 589 00:42:01,283 --> 00:42:02,763 and for those who never will. 590 00:42:07,483 --> 00:42:12,163 Andrew and Bernadette, you have asked for your child to be baptised. 591 00:42:12,203 --> 00:42:15,203 In doing so, you are accepting the responsibility of training 592 00:42:15,243 --> 00:42:17,963 Lance Padraig Byrne in the practice of the faith. 593 00:42:20,003 --> 00:42:23,763 It will be your duty to bring Lance Padraig Byrne up, 594 00:42:23,803 --> 00:42:25,683 to keep the Lord's Commandments 595 00:42:25,723 --> 00:42:30,203 as Jesus taught us by loving God and our neighbour. 596 00:42:30,243 --> 00:42:33,363 Do you clearly understand what you are undertaking? 597 00:42:34,843 --> 00:42:36,043 We do. 598 00:42:38,883 --> 00:42:42,123 Andrew, do you understand what you are undertaking? 599 00:42:42,163 --> 00:42:44,323 Yes. Sorry. 600 00:42:57,403 --> 00:42:59,923 I baptise you in the name of the Father 601 00:42:59,963 --> 00:43:02,203 and of the Son and the Holy Spirit. 602 00:43:06,083 --> 00:43:07,443 Amen. 603 00:43:36,363 --> 00:43:39,163 MUSIC: Cardinal Knowledge by Kila 604 00:43:44,443 --> 00:43:47,203 ALL CHATTER 605 00:43:54,243 --> 00:43:56,643 Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello! FEEDBACK 606 00:43:56,683 --> 00:43:57,923 Hello. 607 00:43:57,963 --> 00:44:01,963 Sorry, I just want to say a few words, that's all. 608 00:44:02,003 --> 00:44:07,003 It's been a beautiful day so far and a lovely service. 609 00:44:13,363 --> 00:44:15,923 The passing of Lance. 610 00:44:15,963 --> 00:44:18,043 The arrival of a newborn. 611 00:44:19,563 --> 00:44:21,803 It focuses not only the mind... 612 00:44:21,843 --> 00:44:24,123 but also the heart. 613 00:44:26,283 --> 00:44:31,483 Not so many years ago, you, Andrew, were the baby. 614 00:44:31,523 --> 00:44:34,683 Born just across the way there on the kitchen floor. 615 00:44:34,723 --> 00:44:37,283 It was quite the Tuesday night, I can tell you. 616 00:44:37,323 --> 00:44:39,163 Why, your Granny Agnes, there, 617 00:44:39,203 --> 00:44:43,523 she was mopping up the floor for weeks after. 618 00:44:43,563 --> 00:44:46,443 Where have all the years gone, eh? 619 00:44:46,483 --> 00:44:52,363 Now, I don't have to tell you, as a father, just how that feels. 620 00:44:54,043 --> 00:44:58,163 To bring a life into this world, to love something, 621 00:44:58,203 --> 00:45:02,283 to love someone more than you could possibly love yourself. 622 00:45:04,843 --> 00:45:06,403 That's the way it should be... 623 00:45:09,003 --> 00:45:13,403 ..but we don't say that often enough, do we, son, us men? 624 00:45:13,443 --> 00:45:17,603 In fact, to my shame I can hardly remember the last time 625 00:45:17,643 --> 00:45:19,243 I actually said that... 626 00:45:20,843 --> 00:45:22,683 ..but I'm proud of you, son. 627 00:45:24,363 --> 00:45:26,203 You've been the joy of my life. 628 00:45:28,243 --> 00:45:33,803 But as I grow old with spectacles on my nose and pouch on my side, 629 00:45:33,843 --> 00:45:36,083 you'll stay strong. 630 00:45:36,123 --> 00:45:38,043 We pass the baton. 631 00:45:39,163 --> 00:45:42,283 Father to son. And on again. 632 00:45:43,723 --> 00:45:47,163 It is a wise father that knows his own child. 633 00:45:47,203 --> 00:45:49,843 Though I may not be wise... 634 00:45:49,883 --> 00:45:51,323 I am proud. 635 00:45:59,323 --> 00:46:01,403 Proud, my boy, to know you. 636 00:46:01,443 --> 00:46:03,443 Oh, you...! 637 00:46:06,323 --> 00:46:10,923 And I only wish that your children become the joy of your life. 638 00:46:10,963 --> 00:46:12,563 THUNDER RUMBLES 639 00:46:16,563 --> 00:46:19,643 MUSIC: You Really Got me by The Kinks 640 00:46:24,243 --> 00:46:28,683 Peter, where are you? I am worried about you. Please call me. 641 00:46:33,203 --> 00:46:35,483 Did you get Peter? Voice mail. 642 00:46:38,043 --> 00:46:41,603 Drinky.I'm not drinking.Why not? 643 00:46:41,643 --> 00:46:45,323 I just don't want to. I don't have to, do I? 644 00:46:45,363 --> 00:46:48,203 Give it to me. I will take it off your hands. 645 00:46:49,563 --> 00:46:53,523 Fancy a turn on the dance floor? I'm just not in the mood, love. 646 00:46:53,563 --> 00:46:56,803 Course you're not. It's only a party, after all, huh? 647 00:47:08,363 --> 00:47:11,083 Kat told me what happened. Did she now? 648 00:47:12,643 --> 00:47:15,363 She wanted to tell you, I mean, she was going to tell you. 649 00:47:15,403 --> 00:47:18,963 She was just looking for the right time. 650 00:47:19,003 --> 00:47:20,803 She's only trying to protect you, Dermott. 651 00:47:20,843 --> 00:47:22,883 Yeah, just like Agnes was all those years. 652 00:47:22,923 --> 00:47:24,963 Look how that turned out. 653 00:47:25,003 --> 00:47:27,163 Life's a funny old thing, eh? 654 00:47:27,203 --> 00:47:31,043 That's life. So old Blue Eyes himself says. 655 00:47:31,083 --> 00:47:35,083 Yeah, riding high in April, shot down in May. That's the one. 656 00:47:35,123 --> 00:47:36,843 How's the hand? 657 00:47:36,883 --> 00:47:38,763 Well, it's... It's getting there. 658 00:47:38,803 --> 00:47:41,123 Kat's not too happy about the window, though. 659 00:47:41,163 --> 00:47:43,683 Yeah, that'll come out of your deposit. CHUCKLING: OK. 660 00:47:45,243 --> 00:47:47,043 Did you book the flights yet? 661 00:47:47,083 --> 00:47:49,843 No. No. There's a problem with the airline. 662 00:47:54,163 --> 00:47:55,643 You're lying to me. 663 00:47:57,723 --> 00:47:59,323 So tell me. 664 00:48:03,323 --> 00:48:05,243 I had a scan earlier. 665 00:48:06,563 --> 00:48:08,803 I can't tell Kat, obviously. But, um... 666 00:48:12,803 --> 00:48:14,483 It's not good news. 667 00:48:56,763 --> 00:48:58,723 So when you say it's grown... 668 00:49:01,283 --> 00:49:03,123 They want to do a biopsy. 669 00:49:04,603 --> 00:49:07,003 Just to see what they're dealing with. 670 00:49:09,083 --> 00:49:14,123 You know, I don't know whether to laugh, cry or scream... 671 00:49:15,923 --> 00:49:18,843 It just feels like someone's really upset the big man upstairs, 672 00:49:18,883 --> 00:49:20,883 you know? 673 00:49:20,923 --> 00:49:22,563 Well, I'll be praying for you. 674 00:49:25,483 --> 00:49:27,283 Do you think that will help, do you? 675 00:49:30,003 --> 00:49:31,923 There have been scientific studies 676 00:49:31,963 --> 00:49:34,443 that prove the efficacy of prayer, you know. 677 00:49:38,203 --> 00:49:41,843 It does seem to me that you're searching for answers, Alfie. 678 00:49:43,883 --> 00:49:47,723 It's funny, I was thinking, as I was driving over here, 679 00:49:47,763 --> 00:49:49,683 who's going to put the bins out? 680 00:49:51,363 --> 00:49:53,083 Cos that... 681 00:49:53,123 --> 00:49:56,003 That was my little job every... 682 00:49:56,043 --> 00:49:59,323 Every Tuesday night, you know. I'd put the bins out. 683 00:50:07,363 --> 00:50:11,163 I don't want to die before I see my kids grow up. 684 00:50:20,163 --> 00:50:22,203 Will you christen me, Father? 685 00:50:27,043 --> 00:50:28,363 TYRES SQUEAL 686 00:50:38,803 --> 00:50:41,323 'Willy was always half cut on Diesel fumes, anyway.' 687 00:50:41,363 --> 00:50:44,323 So he's driving along and he saw this bale of hay - 688 00:50:44,363 --> 00:50:47,523 and something catches his eye, you know - it's moving. 689 00:50:47,563 --> 00:50:52,083 This great, big, fat bale of hay starts rolling down the hill. 690 00:50:52,123 --> 00:50:53,763 So Willy jumps out of the car. 691 00:50:53,803 --> 00:50:56,163 rushes up to it and guess what he sees? 692 00:50:56,203 --> 00:50:59,763 Two big black eyes staring at him. It was Bella the cow! 693 00:51:18,123 --> 00:51:19,323 Sorry. 694 00:51:26,523 --> 00:51:28,723 You look as miserable as your daughter. 695 00:51:31,683 --> 00:51:34,003 Are you all right? 696 00:51:34,043 --> 00:51:36,363 What do you care if I am or not? 697 00:51:45,163 --> 00:51:46,883 You took advantage of me. 698 00:51:49,283 --> 00:51:51,043 No. You tricked me. 699 00:51:53,683 --> 00:51:54,803 You've been drinking. 700 00:51:56,443 --> 00:51:57,723 We can talk about it tomorrow. 701 00:51:57,763 --> 00:51:59,403 I don't want to talk about it tomorrow. 702 00:51:59,443 --> 00:52:01,243 I want to talk about it now. 703 00:52:09,043 --> 00:52:11,883 You can lie to yourself all you want. 704 00:52:11,923 --> 00:52:14,083 We both know what happened. 705 00:53:22,643 --> 00:53:26,003 PARTY MUSIC PLAYS FAINTLY OUTSIDE 706 00:53:29,443 --> 00:53:31,923 MUSIC PLAYS ON RADIO 707 00:53:46,403 --> 00:53:47,723 MUSIC STOPS 708 00:54:03,763 --> 00:54:06,483 NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE 709 00:54:50,483 --> 00:54:52,043 HE GASPS 710 00:56:02,283 --> 00:56:04,723 # She's a rich and rare land 711 00:56:04,763 --> 00:56:08,603 # Oh, she's a warm and bold land 712 00:56:08,643 --> 00:56:13,283 # Oh, she's a true and old land 713 00:56:13,323 --> 00:56:17,803 # This native land of mine. #