1 00:00:07,429 --> 00:00:09,497 Young Brockmire's known for his temper. 2 00:00:09,530 --> 00:00:11,299 Let's see if he tries to brush back the batter 3 00:00:11,333 --> 00:00:13,336 with a little chin music! 4 00:00:15,970 --> 00:00:17,639 Oh! Oh! It's coming! 5 00:00:18,674 --> 00:00:19,808 Steee-rike! 6 00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:21,174 The catcher, Brockmire, 7 00:00:21,222 --> 00:00:23,811 is gonna have to take a minute to recover from that fastball! 8 00:00:23,845 --> 00:00:25,747 Oh, Brockmire snap-throws to the first baseman, 9 00:00:25,781 --> 00:00:27,549 Brockmire, who lays down the tag, 10 00:00:27,581 --> 00:00:29,484 and Brockmire's out! 11 00:00:29,517 --> 00:00:30,633 Brockmire's out! 12 00:00:47,636 --> 00:00:49,821 What time is it, Jim? 13 00:00:49,940 --> 00:00:53,441 - I-It's Tiki Time. - Mm. 14 00:00:53,475 --> 00:00:56,377 And what are the rules of Tiki Time? 15 00:00:56,411 --> 00:00:57,578 - No talking. - Mm. 16 00:00:57,612 --> 00:00:58,779 No crying. 17 00:00:58,813 --> 00:01:02,450 - And every day is paradise. - And every day is paradise. 18 00:01:13,095 --> 00:01:14,962 Oh, God! 19 00:01:14,996 --> 00:01:17,800 The nails are splitting the bamboo! God damn it! 20 00:01:17,833 --> 00:01:22,804 I spent $40 on this cheap piece of shit! 21 00:01:22,837 --> 00:01:24,473 Son of a... 22 00:01:24,506 --> 00:01:25,941 The mound at Candlestick right now 23 00:01:25,973 --> 00:01:28,576 is the loneliest place on Earth, 24 00:01:28,610 --> 00:01:31,980 and there's 33,000 people in the stadium 25 00:01:32,012 --> 00:01:35,484 and about 1 million butterflies. 26 00:01:38,152 --> 00:01:40,356 I can't believe it. 27 00:01:40,389 --> 00:01:42,791 I mean, I was always so diligent. 28 00:01:42,824 --> 00:01:44,626 And it's not like I was a nun. 29 00:01:44,658 --> 00:01:45,759 There were a few years back in my 20s 30 00:01:45,794 --> 00:01:49,497 where I was getting more dick than a bathhouse in 1978. 31 00:01:49,530 --> 00:01:53,568 And not one pregnancy scare. 32 00:01:53,601 --> 00:01:57,372 I just... I never imagined I would be conflicted at all. 33 00:01:57,405 --> 00:02:00,975 All right. I got... $100, $200, $345, 34 00:02:01,009 --> 00:02:03,145 and we can stop at the ATM on the way there. 35 00:02:03,178 --> 00:02:04,747 And let's definitely tip. 36 00:02:04,780 --> 00:02:06,548 Those people... they... they work hard. 37 00:02:06,580 --> 00:02:08,384 What is this? What are you doing? 38 00:02:08,416 --> 00:02:10,718 Look, I never have gotten anybody pregnant before, 39 00:02:10,752 --> 00:02:13,455 but I have paid for my share of abortions, all right? 40 00:02:13,487 --> 00:02:16,724 Just, you know, as a friend, a mentor, a pro-choice advocate, 41 00:02:16,758 --> 00:02:18,527 as a small-loan investor one time... 42 00:02:18,559 --> 00:02:20,094 Okay, Jim, slow down. 43 00:02:20,128 --> 00:02:23,932 I... am still weighing my options. 44 00:02:23,964 --> 00:02:27,402 No, please. Entirely up to you. I understand. 45 00:02:27,435 --> 00:02:29,137 I gave up my vote at ejaculation, 46 00:02:29,171 --> 00:02:31,440 so, you know, feminism, 47 00:02:31,473 --> 00:02:33,008 your body, your choice... 48 00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:35,910 all of that razzmatazz. 49 00:02:35,944 --> 00:02:37,578 Thank you. 50 00:02:40,714 --> 00:02:42,717 I just need some time to think about it. 51 00:02:42,750 --> 00:02:43,819 And you need to think about 52 00:02:43,851 --> 00:02:46,021 whether you're able to be a father. 53 00:02:48,089 --> 00:02:50,124 I'm gonna have to ask you for some numbers here, 54 00:02:50,158 --> 00:02:51,827 because right now, you're just giving me 55 00:02:51,860 --> 00:02:54,897 a whole lot of maybe homework. 56 00:02:54,929 --> 00:02:57,199 Are you asking me for abortion odds? 57 00:02:57,231 --> 00:02:58,800 I am. Yes. 58 00:02:58,833 --> 00:03:02,703 Just please, for brevity and for clarity's sake. 59 00:03:02,736 --> 00:03:05,673 Okay. Right now, I'd say... 60 00:03:10,010 --> 00:03:13,548 ... 60/40 in favor of keeping it. 61 00:03:13,582 --> 00:03:15,617 Really? 62 00:03:15,649 --> 00:03:17,185 Wow. 63 00:03:17,219 --> 00:03:19,188 I think I might have backed you into an answer there. 64 00:03:19,220 --> 00:03:20,349 - No! - No, I think I did 65 00:03:20,337 --> 00:03:21,485 And I think we should both 66 00:03:21,490 --> 00:03:22,991 just take our time with this whole thing. 67 00:03:23,023 --> 00:03:25,059 Yes. I-I agree. 68 00:03:37,706 --> 00:03:39,774 Hey, Jim. 69 00:03:39,808 --> 00:03:41,777 What are you doing here? 70 00:03:41,809 --> 00:03:42,978 Oh, I just wanted to see 71 00:03:43,010 --> 00:03:45,146 if maybe you want to have a catch with me. 72 00:03:45,179 --> 00:03:47,883 Like, with, um, a Frisbee or... ? 73 00:03:47,915 --> 00:03:49,984 Uh, no, like with a baseball, Charles. 74 00:03:50,017 --> 00:03:50,914 - Ah. - It's time you learned the very 75 00:03:50,923 --> 00:03:51,881 basics of the game 76 00:03:51,886 --> 00:03:53,622 that you watch every single day. 77 00:03:53,654 --> 00:03:55,491 Yeah. Sure. 78 00:03:55,523 --> 00:03:57,558 - Yeah. I'm down. - Great. Great. 79 00:03:57,592 --> 00:03:58,893 - Charles? - Yeah? 80 00:03:58,927 --> 00:04:00,529 How about you go wash your hands first? 81 00:04:00,562 --> 00:04:02,664 Okay. I'm gonna go... 82 00:04:02,696 --> 00:04:04,967 I'm gonna go do that. 83 00:04:12,540 --> 00:04:14,509 Women! Get out of here. 84 00:04:14,542 --> 00:04:16,479 Well, wonders never cease. 85 00:04:18,113 --> 00:04:19,915 Wow. That hurt? 86 00:04:19,947 --> 00:04:21,215 Ah. 87 00:04:21,248 --> 00:04:23,217 - It's... - You're not playing tag with it. 88 00:04:23,250 --> 00:04:25,988 You just... just open your mitt and watch it go in there. 89 00:04:26,020 --> 00:04:27,301 Why are we doing this? 90 00:04:27,356 --> 00:04:29,957 Every boy has to at least know how to play catch. 91 00:04:29,991 --> 00:04:31,700 - Why? - Because you're an American, 92 00:04:31,739 --> 00:04:32,739 God damn it. 93 00:04:32,794 --> 00:04:34,195 This is how the game continues. 94 00:04:34,229 --> 00:04:36,098 It gets passed down through generations, 95 00:04:36,130 --> 00:04:39,767 fathers patiently teaching their sons, et cetera. 96 00:04:41,169 --> 00:04:42,904 Oh. My God. 97 00:04:42,938 --> 00:04:45,673 Y-You throw like a blind baby waving bye-bye. 98 00:04:45,707 --> 00:04:46,974 What was that? 99 00:04:47,008 --> 00:04:48,709 Are you sure you're right-handed? 100 00:04:48,743 --> 00:04:51,747 I'm... I-I think so. 101 00:04:51,779 --> 00:04:53,849 Look, my father taught me how to throw a baseball. 102 00:04:53,882 --> 00:04:57,019 It was about the best 10 minutes we ever spent. 103 00:04:59,621 --> 00:05:01,589 Getting closer, getting closer. 104 00:05:01,623 --> 00:05:04,693 Mm. I see what this is. 105 00:05:04,726 --> 00:05:06,827 You're trying to work out your father issues on me. 106 00:05:06,861 --> 00:05:08,195 No, I'm not. 107 00:05:08,229 --> 00:05:10,132 I couldn't give two shits about that asshole. 108 00:05:10,164 --> 00:05:13,301 He spent my entire chi... 109 00:05:13,334 --> 00:05:15,236 He spent my entire childhood 110 00:05:15,270 --> 00:05:18,707 building a Tiki bar in our backyard 111 00:05:18,739 --> 00:05:21,109 so he could just drink alone. 112 00:05:21,142 --> 00:05:22,945 I'm nothing like that idiot. 113 00:05:22,977 --> 00:05:25,112 You sure? You're a raging alcoholic, 114 00:05:25,145 --> 00:05:26,714 and you spent the last 10 years of your life 115 00:05:26,748 --> 00:05:28,250 in tropical Southeast Asia. 116 00:05:28,282 --> 00:05:31,218 Uh, let's dial it down, okay, Dr. Joyce Brothers. 117 00:05:31,251 --> 00:05:33,220 We're not trying to work on my daddy issues here. 118 00:05:33,253 --> 00:05:34,922 We're working on yours. 119 00:05:34,955 --> 00:05:36,857 - I thought you wanted a father figure. - For sure. 120 00:05:36,890 --> 00:05:39,226 I barely see my dad now 'cause of the divorce, 121 00:05:39,260 --> 00:05:41,697 and my stepdad's a hard-ass, 122 00:05:41,729 --> 00:05:44,832 but you're the last person I'd peg as my father figure. 123 00:05:44,866 --> 00:05:46,969 Kind of thought I already was. 124 00:05:47,001 --> 00:05:48,936 Mm. 125 00:05:48,969 --> 00:05:50,606 You think I'd be a good father? 126 00:05:50,638 --> 00:05:53,140 It would be mean of me to say 127 00:05:53,173 --> 00:05:57,078 you'd be a bad father, but... 128 00:05:57,111 --> 00:05:59,147 I'm willing to be mean to make sure you never procreate. 129 00:05:59,180 --> 00:06:02,317 Yeah, you would be a terrible father. Don't do that. 130 00:06:02,349 --> 00:06:04,785 Never mind, all right? Let's just play catch. 131 00:06:04,818 --> 00:06:07,355 Now, just get ready. Keep your glove open. 132 00:06:07,388 --> 00:06:09,290 - Just watch it go... - This is boring. 133 00:06:09,323 --> 00:06:12,026 - What else do you have to do? - You saw me up there. 134 00:06:12,060 --> 00:06:13,060 I am 17, 135 00:06:13,094 --> 00:06:15,330 and porn is literally endless on the Internet. 136 00:06:15,363 --> 00:06:18,367 Sometimes, I just put in a random body part 137 00:06:18,399 --> 00:06:20,034 to see if someone's thought to put a dick in it. 138 00:06:20,068 --> 00:06:21,303 They always have. 139 00:06:21,335 --> 00:06:23,304 Baseball can't compete with pornography! 140 00:06:23,337 --> 00:06:26,308 I mean, nothing can. 141 00:06:26,341 --> 00:06:28,910 Oh, fine. Go jerk off. 142 00:06:28,943 --> 00:06:31,746 Beat it! Literally. 143 00:06:31,779 --> 00:06:34,315 Let me know if you need me to send you any links! 144 00:06:34,349 --> 00:06:36,784 Well, don't leave your... Oh, man. 145 00:06:40,087 --> 00:06:42,890 Brockmire known for his temper. 146 00:06:42,923 --> 00:06:44,993 Let's see if he brushes back this batter 147 00:06:45,025 --> 00:06:47,456 with a little bit of chin music! 148 00:06:48,559 --> 00:06:51,133 Oh, he does. Oh, my goodness. 149 00:06:51,166 --> 00:06:54,003 He put the fear of God into Jenkins there. 150 00:06:58,289 --> 00:07:00,825 Mmm. 151 00:07:00,912 --> 00:07:02,280 Mmm. 152 00:07:02,286 --> 00:07:03,822 Mm. 153 00:07:04,425 --> 00:07:08,728 Can I have like, um... 154 00:07:08,761 --> 00:07:10,730 a seltzer water? 155 00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:13,567 What's going on? Are you sick? 156 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,004 Oh, my God. Do you have cancer? 157 00:07:19,740 --> 00:07:22,442 I don't mean for this to sound judgmental in any way, 158 00:07:22,475 --> 00:07:24,411 but, um... 159 00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,020 You've had an abortion, right? 160 00:07:26,101 --> 00:07:27,839 Oh, yeah! Yeah. 161 00:07:28,514 --> 00:07:29,749 And it wasn't easy. 162 00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:31,451 No, it seems like a really hard choice. 163 00:07:31,485 --> 00:07:33,062 No, the choice was easy. 164 00:07:33,132 --> 00:07:35,909 Getting the procedure done was the hard part. 165 00:07:36,034 --> 00:07:37,356 So, at first, I couldn't go 166 00:07:37,396 --> 00:07:39,015 to the Planned Parenthood in town 'cause it burned down. 167 00:07:39,048 --> 00:07:42,507 I heard they had an accident when I fire-bombed the place. 168 00:07:43,867 --> 00:07:45,771 You burned down a Planned Parenthood? 169 00:07:45,804 --> 00:07:47,573 Yeah. 170 00:07:47,605 --> 00:07:48,873 Okay, anyways. 171 00:07:48,906 --> 00:07:49,841 That meant I had to pay 172 00:07:49,874 --> 00:07:51,809 for a round-trip bus ticket to Pittsburgh, 173 00:07:51,843 --> 00:07:53,712 plus the cost of three nights at the hotel, 174 00:07:53,745 --> 00:07:54,745 plus the cost of the surgery. 175 00:07:54,780 --> 00:07:56,982 Sweetie, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. 176 00:07:57,014 --> 00:07:58,149 Oh, that's not the worst part. 177 00:07:58,182 --> 00:08:00,117 When I walked into the clinic, 178 00:08:00,151 --> 00:08:02,353 the protestors screamed the worst things 179 00:08:02,386 --> 00:08:04,122 humanly possible in my face, 180 00:08:04,155 --> 00:08:06,925 but it was fine 'cause I was listening to "Shake It Off." 181 00:08:06,958 --> 00:08:10,362 And then somebody threw a diaper full of rocks at me. 182 00:08:10,394 --> 00:08:12,797 - What?! - That I couldn't shake off. 183 00:08:12,831 --> 00:08:14,220 What... What about the procedure? 184 00:08:14,260 --> 00:08:16,000 Oh! That was easy. 185 00:08:16,033 --> 00:08:17,635 You know, they just knocked me out, like pbht! 186 00:08:17,668 --> 00:08:19,236 And sure, when I woke up, I felt like shit 187 00:08:19,269 --> 00:08:21,372 and I had black eye from the rock diaper, but... 188 00:08:21,406 --> 00:08:23,108 Would I do it again? 189 00:08:23,141 --> 00:08:26,011 Yeah. I did. 190 00:08:26,244 --> 00:08:28,614 Jesus, I don't think I can go through that. 191 00:08:28,646 --> 00:08:29,914 Wait. 192 00:08:34,918 --> 00:08:37,622 So I'm... I'm deciding what to do. 193 00:08:37,655 --> 00:08:39,890 I'm raising this town up on my back 194 00:08:39,923 --> 00:08:41,259 with pure womanly strength. 195 00:08:41,292 --> 00:08:45,730 Maybe... Maybe I could raise a baby, too. 196 00:08:45,764 --> 00:08:49,417 Jules, I... love you. 197 00:08:49,472 --> 00:08:51,870 I love you, too, sweetheart. 198 00:08:51,903 --> 00:08:53,971 ... as a boss. 199 00:08:54,004 --> 00:08:57,241 Um... this just feels like a super, like, 200 00:08:57,274 --> 00:09:00,312 personal conversation for, like, "workplace environment." 201 00:09:00,345 --> 00:09:02,781 You just told me every intimate detail of your abortion. 202 00:09:02,813 --> 00:09:04,148 I tell everybody that story! 203 00:09:04,182 --> 00:09:05,850 It's the first thing in my dating profile. 204 00:09:05,884 --> 00:09:07,653 - She tells everybody. - Dale knows. 205 00:09:07,686 --> 00:09:09,721 This just feels like the sort of thing you want to discuss, 206 00:09:09,754 --> 00:09:12,023 like, maybe with friend, you know? 207 00:09:12,057 --> 00:09:14,659 You do have friends, right? 208 00:09:14,692 --> 00:09:15,927 Of course I have friends. 209 00:09:15,960 --> 00:09:17,863 Yeah, you do! 210 00:09:17,895 --> 00:09:18,896 I have a lot of friends. 211 00:09:18,931 --> 00:09:20,999 I just... You know, they just moved away from... 212 00:09:21,032 --> 00:09:22,334 from Morristown. 213 00:09:22,366 --> 00:09:24,769 - Yeah. - They're in Butler Heights now. 214 00:09:24,802 --> 00:09:28,673 I mean, I have a lot of friends that's... 215 00:09:28,706 --> 00:09:30,207 Oh, D-Diana! 216 00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:31,809 Diana is one of my frie... 217 00:09:31,842 --> 00:09:34,413 Ahh! Ooh-ooh! 218 00:09:34,446 --> 00:09:36,081 I can't believe you're pregnant! 219 00:09:36,114 --> 00:09:37,249 Oh! 220 00:09:37,282 --> 00:09:38,817 Oh, man. 221 00:09:38,850 --> 00:09:41,219 You really snuck that one in under the wire. 222 00:09:42,921 --> 00:09:44,990 So, who's the father? Is he cute? Is he blonde? 223 00:09:45,023 --> 00:09:47,225 Tall? Blue eyes? I know what you like. 224 00:09:48,259 --> 00:09:51,430 I think I still have some prenatal vitamins left. 225 00:09:53,130 --> 00:09:55,199 Oh, and Mae has outgrown all of her newborn clothes, 226 00:09:55,232 --> 00:09:56,400 so I can give those to you now. 227 00:09:56,433 --> 00:09:59,170 And look, everyone's gonna warn you how painful birth is, 228 00:09:59,203 --> 00:10:00,871 and they are totally right. 229 00:10:00,904 --> 00:10:02,841 The first one is always horrendous, 230 00:10:02,874 --> 00:10:05,110 but by the third one, she just pbht! 231 00:10:05,143 --> 00:10:06,445 Right out of my vagina. 232 00:10:06,477 --> 00:10:08,285 - Diana... - It was like a trap door opened, 233 00:10:08,365 --> 00:10:09,274 and she just slid out... 234 00:10:09,279 --> 00:10:10,864 I don't know if I'm gonna keep 235 00:10:10,951 --> 00:10:11,951 this baby. 236 00:10:16,863 --> 00:10:18,065 Really? 237 00:10:18,071 --> 00:10:20,040 You don't have any white wine, do you? 238 00:10:20,193 --> 00:10:24,207 Jules... 239 00:10:24,240 --> 00:10:27,043 This baby is your sign... 240 00:10:27,076 --> 00:10:29,946 to let go of the past and embrace change. 241 00:10:29,979 --> 00:10:31,248 Parenthood isn't a prison. 242 00:10:31,281 --> 00:10:34,084 It actually... frees parts of yourself 243 00:10:34,117 --> 00:10:36,020 you didn't even know were there. 244 00:10:39,756 --> 00:10:42,059 - What is that? - The princess is up. 245 00:10:42,091 --> 00:10:43,393 Oh, goody! 246 00:10:43,426 --> 00:10:44,927 Ooh! 247 00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:46,930 Oh! 248 00:10:46,963 --> 00:10:48,165 Can you show her how you walk? 249 00:10:48,198 --> 00:10:50,067 Good job. Say hi to Jules! 250 00:10:50,099 --> 00:10:52,335 Oh! 251 00:10:52,368 --> 00:10:53,771 Say hi to Jules! 252 00:10:55,839 --> 00:10:57,041 Do you want to say hi to Jules? 253 00:10:58,841 --> 00:11:00,009 Oh! She likes you! 254 00:11:00,042 --> 00:11:02,679 High five! 255 00:11:04,802 --> 00:11:07,138 Jose, finish your science project, okay? 256 00:11:07,171 --> 00:11:09,741 Carmina, mi Amor. Come on. 257 00:11:09,774 --> 00:11:12,711 55 times 6 is not 300. Try again. 258 00:11:12,744 --> 00:11:16,281 Ransom, break a leg in the play tomorrow. 259 00:11:16,313 --> 00:11:17,781 Marco. Marco? 260 00:11:17,814 --> 00:11:19,717 Polo! 261 00:11:19,750 --> 00:11:23,254 Mijo! 262 00:11:23,287 --> 00:11:24,889 Okay, Daddy's got to go, okay? 263 00:11:24,922 --> 00:11:26,957 - I love you. - I love you. 264 00:11:26,990 --> 00:11:28,893 - I love you. - I love you. 265 00:11:28,926 --> 00:11:30,662 - I love you. - I love you. 266 00:11:30,695 --> 00:11:33,798 - I love you. - I love you. 267 00:11:33,831 --> 00:11:35,767 Okay, Jim. 268 00:11:35,799 --> 00:11:38,135 You're a pretty big part of your kids' lives there, huh? 269 00:11:38,168 --> 00:11:40,038 Uribe talks to them all the time. 270 00:11:40,071 --> 00:11:42,841 And since there's 13 of them, it takes a lot of work. 271 00:11:42,874 --> 00:11:46,010 So, do you... do you love being a dad? 272 00:11:46,043 --> 00:11:47,345 Eh, mas o menos. 273 00:11:47,378 --> 00:11:49,314 Mostly, I hate wearing condoms. 274 00:11:49,346 --> 00:11:52,650 Why wear a saddle when you like to feel the horse? 275 00:11:52,683 --> 00:11:56,120 Because some horses... they have Gonorrhea. 276 00:11:56,154 --> 00:11:59,189 Gonorrhea is worth it, man, to spread your legacy. 277 00:11:59,222 --> 00:12:02,059 Look. Think about it this way. 278 00:12:02,092 --> 00:12:04,928 Every human body is a... is a DNA machine 279 00:12:04,961 --> 00:12:06,398 designed to reproduce. 280 00:12:06,431 --> 00:12:10,869 Inside of you is a... is a genetic coding 281 00:12:10,902 --> 00:12:13,204 that goes back billions of years. 282 00:12:14,438 --> 00:12:16,674 And who are you to break that chain? 283 00:12:16,707 --> 00:12:19,144 Boy. I never thought about my jizz 284 00:12:19,177 --> 00:12:21,413 in terms of geological time. 285 00:12:21,446 --> 00:12:23,148 One of Uribe's baby mamas 286 00:12:23,181 --> 00:12:25,884 is an Anthropology tenure professor 287 00:12:25,917 --> 00:12:27,851 at Howard University. 288 00:12:31,121 --> 00:12:33,223 With an ass that you could just bury your face like that. 289 00:12:33,256 --> 00:12:36,227 Br-Br-Br-Br! 290 00:12:39,062 --> 00:12:41,066 - Who is it? - Brockmire. 291 00:12:41,099 --> 00:12:43,435 Just shut up. Let me talk. 292 00:12:43,467 --> 00:12:45,904 After Lucy, I did not want to have kids. 293 00:12:45,937 --> 00:12:47,438 I just... I didn't want to bring a child 294 00:12:47,471 --> 00:12:49,039 into a world this cold, you know? 295 00:12:49,072 --> 00:12:50,975 But then I met you, darling, 296 00:12:51,008 --> 00:12:53,411 and every day feels like a warm, sunny afternoon to me, 297 00:12:53,443 --> 00:12:55,312 so, I don't know. 298 00:12:55,346 --> 00:12:58,450 I just figure anything half-you can't be all bad, right? 299 00:12:58,482 --> 00:13:00,317 I want to terminate the pregnancy. 300 00:13:00,351 --> 00:13:02,120 Oh, Thank you, God. Seriously. 301 00:13:02,153 --> 00:13:03,988 - Thank you. - I went to see my friend Diana, 302 00:13:04,020 --> 00:13:06,123 and she has this cute, little, fat angel baby, 303 00:13:06,157 --> 00:13:07,859 and... 304 00:13:07,892 --> 00:13:10,261 I sat her in my lap and I stared into her eyes 305 00:13:10,293 --> 00:13:12,996 and I just... I... 306 00:13:13,029 --> 00:13:15,232 I felt nothing. 307 00:13:15,265 --> 00:13:17,267 If that slice of heaven didn't give me a kick 308 00:13:17,301 --> 00:13:21,105 to the Utes, I don't want to be a mom. 309 00:13:21,139 --> 00:13:24,743 Anyway, the team is my baby. 310 00:13:24,775 --> 00:13:28,412 And... in a way... 311 00:13:28,446 --> 00:13:31,282 you and I are raising it together. 312 00:13:31,314 --> 00:13:32,883 Well... 313 00:13:32,917 --> 00:13:36,754 Look, we really dodged a bullet with my DNA, anyway. 314 00:13:36,788 --> 00:13:39,023 Seriously. Alcoholism, drug addiction, 315 00:13:39,056 --> 00:13:41,326 and this voice are all hereditary, for both sexes. 316 00:13:41,359 --> 00:13:43,428 No, every single one of my aunts 317 00:13:43,461 --> 00:13:46,431 was in a barbershop quartet, so... 318 00:13:46,463 --> 00:13:49,533 Yeah. 319 00:13:49,567 --> 00:13:53,437 We're gonna have to go to Pittsburgh for the procedure. 320 00:13:53,471 --> 00:13:55,306 Yeah! Road trip, baby! 321 00:13:55,338 --> 00:13:56,507 A little less enthusiasm. 322 00:13:56,540 --> 00:13:58,108 Sorry. Just... Road trip. 323 00:13:58,142 --> 00:13:59,544 Road trip. 324 00:13:59,577 --> 00:14:01,746 No baby. 325 00:14:03,109 --> 00:14:05,546 And you understand all the risks 326 00:14:05,579 --> 00:14:07,080 in terminating a pregnancy? 327 00:14:07,113 --> 00:14:09,516 Actually, I have a question. Is this like batteries? 328 00:14:09,548 --> 00:14:11,951 Do we have to bring it to the recycling center afterwards? 329 00:14:16,590 --> 00:14:17,925 I'm joking. 330 00:14:17,958 --> 00:14:19,560 You probably get that kind of thing a lot, right? 331 00:14:19,593 --> 00:14:22,695 You know... we really don't. 332 00:14:22,729 --> 00:14:24,598 Okay. 333 00:14:24,631 --> 00:14:26,934 How soon can we schedule the procedure? 334 00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:34,107 That is the procedure. 335 00:14:34,139 --> 00:14:37,577 Based on your ultrasound, you're not yet seven weeks, 336 00:14:37,610 --> 00:14:39,846 so a D&C isn't recommended. 337 00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:43,583 You know, I... Pills are really hard for me. 338 00:14:43,617 --> 00:14:45,118 I'm more of a type of girl. 339 00:14:45,151 --> 00:14:47,253 Please don't use a cocaine gesture in front of me. 340 00:14:47,287 --> 00:14:49,656 - I'm a doctor. - Sorry. 341 00:14:49,689 --> 00:14:51,024 I just want to make sure 342 00:14:51,056 --> 00:14:53,060 that you two have really thought this through. 343 00:14:53,093 --> 00:14:54,962 It's a serious decision. 344 00:14:54,994 --> 00:14:56,596 There are no take-backs. 345 00:14:56,629 --> 00:14:58,130 - No, please. We totally get that. - Yeah. 346 00:14:58,163 --> 00:15:00,066 No, trust me. I have thought about this long and hard, 347 00:15:00,099 --> 00:15:03,803 and this is what's best for us. 348 00:15:03,836 --> 00:15:05,037 And for everyone else. 349 00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:07,007 The world has enough barbershop quartets. 350 00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:14,147 Okay. So. 351 00:15:14,180 --> 00:15:17,885 I want you to take... one pill now 352 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:22,288 and the other within 8 to 12 hours. 353 00:15:22,321 --> 00:15:24,123 - Now? - Yes. 354 00:15:24,157 --> 00:15:26,692 - Like, right here? - Right now. 355 00:15:26,725 --> 00:15:28,160 Okay. 356 00:15:28,194 --> 00:15:30,163 - All right. - Okay. 357 00:15:30,195 --> 00:15:32,599 No warming up in the bullpen. 358 00:15:37,202 --> 00:15:39,038 - Here we go. - Yep. 359 00:15:44,978 --> 00:15:46,780 You okay? 360 00:15:46,812 --> 00:15:47,780 Mm-hmm. 361 00:15:49,349 --> 00:15:51,785 Is there some... some other way we could give it to her? 362 00:15:51,817 --> 00:15:52,952 No. 363 00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:03,096 It's okay to chew it? 364 00:16:03,128 --> 00:16:05,633 No. 365 00:16:10,604 --> 00:16:12,573 - Ah. Okay. - Good? 366 00:16:19,244 --> 00:16:21,248 Pre-gaming this abortion, darling... 367 00:16:21,281 --> 00:16:23,316 it was the best idea that you ever had. 368 00:16:23,349 --> 00:16:25,118 I know. 369 00:16:25,151 --> 00:16:27,120 I've been cutting back so much. 370 00:16:27,152 --> 00:16:28,688 Now we have to celebrate. 371 00:16:28,721 --> 00:16:31,123 Oh, I agree. 372 00:16:31,157 --> 00:16:33,326 And don't mind if I do! 373 00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:43,670 Ooh, that's got a kick. 374 00:16:43,702 --> 00:16:45,871 Oh, what the hell? 375 00:16:45,905 --> 00:16:48,208 What the hell? 376 00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:54,780 - Ooh! - Okay. 377 00:16:54,814 --> 00:16:57,250 Hello! 378 00:16:57,282 --> 00:16:59,219 Baby! Oh! 379 00:16:59,252 --> 00:17:00,721 - Thoughtful. - Mm-hmm. 380 00:17:00,753 --> 00:17:02,154 Look at how nice that is. 381 00:17:02,188 --> 00:17:03,790 Cheers. 382 00:17:03,823 --> 00:17:06,159 Let's do this. 383 00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:08,394 - Yeah. - Wait, where's my pill? 384 00:17:08,428 --> 00:17:10,330 I don't know. Where is your pill? 385 00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:12,999 I chopped it up so I could toot it. 386 00:17:13,033 --> 00:17:16,203 You know I don't like swallowing lumps of medicine. 387 00:17:22,842 --> 00:17:24,945 You snorted my abortion. 388 00:17:24,978 --> 00:17:26,747 Oh! Oh, you should know better than to... 389 00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:28,648 First of all, greedy! 390 00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:30,717 Second of all, are you freaking kidding me? 391 00:17:30,749 --> 00:17:32,051 All right, all right, all right. 392 00:17:32,085 --> 00:17:33,420 Okay, I'm... I'm gonna die, right? 393 00:17:33,452 --> 00:17:35,122 - Am I gonna die? - I don't know. 394 00:17:35,154 --> 00:17:36,389 Am I going to die? 395 00:17:36,422 --> 00:17:38,191 - I don't know! - Well, let's find out. 396 00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:40,793 Oh, my God. Oh! 397 00:17:40,826 --> 00:17:42,863 What should we do? All right. 398 00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:44,230 What are we gonna do? 399 00:17:44,264 --> 00:17:47,200 - Okay, it burns. I... - Oh, it burns. 400 00:17:47,232 --> 00:17:48,668 Thank you so much for coming in. 401 00:17:48,701 --> 00:17:50,336 Yeah, of course. 402 00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:53,407 In case of emergency, I'm always happy to help. 403 00:17:57,110 --> 00:17:58,912 So, what happened? Something wrong? 404 00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:03,717 All right, suppose just hypothetically... 405 00:18:03,749 --> 00:18:06,085 What if I took one of her pills by mistake? 406 00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:08,321 Would that... What would happen? 407 00:18:08,354 --> 00:18:10,691 I have no idea. That's never happened before. 408 00:18:10,723 --> 00:18:13,426 I guess you're going to experience the same symptoms. 409 00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:17,831 Nausea, cramping, spotting... hypothetically. 410 00:18:17,864 --> 00:18:19,865 I just don't know from where. 411 00:18:19,899 --> 00:18:21,869 Could I just get another pill, please? 412 00:18:29,008 --> 00:18:31,244 Then we'll be out of your hair. 413 00:18:31,277 --> 00:18:34,847 I want you to take that in front of me. 414 00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:40,086 No problem. 415 00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:42,356 - Can we move this along a little bit? - Yep. 416 00:18:57,269 --> 00:18:59,071 I did it. 417 00:18:59,104 --> 00:19:02,976 It just... It just... smoothly went down. 418 00:19:03,008 --> 00:19:05,245 Thank God. 419 00:19:05,277 --> 00:19:07,748 Now you can leave. 420 00:19:07,780 --> 00:19:09,148 And never come back. 421 00:19:09,181 --> 00:19:11,485 All right. You cramping? 422 00:19:11,517 --> 00:19:14,386 - Spotting. - Oh. 423 00:19:17,422 --> 00:19:19,226 Fucking people. 424 00:19:20,460 --> 00:19:22,362 Not a pleasant 24 hours. 425 00:19:22,394 --> 00:19:25,198 Oh, I-I know what you mean. 426 00:19:25,230 --> 00:19:26,999 And apparently, I am the first man 427 00:19:27,033 --> 00:19:30,036 in medical history who can say that. 428 00:19:30,068 --> 00:19:33,139 I didn't expect you to step up and be so supportive. 429 00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:36,476 I know. I-I was surprised by that, too, but... 430 00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:37,651 What can I say? 431 00:19:37,698 --> 00:19:40,013 This is definitely the best relationship of my life, 432 00:19:40,046 --> 00:19:42,523 and... and you're my favorite person. 433 00:19:44,316 --> 00:19:47,153 Okay, what did we learn from this? 434 00:19:47,187 --> 00:19:51,158 If I see a random line, say "No, thank you, I'm fine." 435 00:19:51,191 --> 00:19:52,459 No, I'm serious. 436 00:19:52,491 --> 00:19:54,426 Something positive should come out of this. 437 00:19:54,460 --> 00:19:56,529 We should... We should do something for a kid. 438 00:19:58,753 --> 00:20:00,789 Hey, how about 13 kids? 439 00:20:07,154 --> 00:20:09,124 Man, that is a lot of children. 440 00:20:13,827 --> 00:20:15,096 Yes. Corazon. 441 00:20:15,128 --> 00:20:17,698 Love you, too. 442 00:20:17,731 --> 00:20:19,200 Look at this. 443 00:20:19,232 --> 00:20:21,702 We put a little, tiny bit of good into the world. 444 00:20:21,735 --> 00:20:24,105 Mm-hmm. 445 00:20:26,406 --> 00:20:28,175 Holy shit. Is that... 446 00:20:28,209 --> 00:20:30,045 That's Robbie Butler! 447 00:20:30,077 --> 00:20:31,779 - Robbie Butler? - Jim. 448 00:20:31,812 --> 00:20:33,113 The hell are you doing here, man? 449 00:20:33,146 --> 00:20:34,715 God, it's good to see you! 450 00:20:34,749 --> 00:20:37,085 - Good to see you, buddy. - What are you up to? 451 00:20:37,117 --> 00:20:39,053 Well, I'm coaching at Oklahoma State. 452 00:20:39,087 --> 00:20:41,122 - Get out of here. Well, that's fantastic! - Yeah. 453 00:20:41,154 --> 00:20:42,389 - Yeah. - My God. 454 00:20:42,423 --> 00:20:43,724 How you doing? 455 00:20:43,758 --> 00:20:45,460 Oh, you know, I'm all right. 456 00:20:45,492 --> 00:20:49,063 Hey, Robbie. I... I got to say, 457 00:20:49,096 --> 00:20:51,331 of all the awful things I did in my life, 458 00:20:51,365 --> 00:20:53,067 how I treated you was right up there. 459 00:20:53,100 --> 00:20:55,202 No, really. I mean, you were a good friend 460 00:20:55,235 --> 00:20:57,137 and an adequate broadcaster, and I just... 461 00:20:57,171 --> 00:21:00,141 I should have helped you out more, and, well, I'm sorry. 462 00:21:00,173 --> 00:21:02,410 Well, it's great to hear you say that, Jim. 463 00:21:02,442 --> 00:21:05,312 But, hey, listen. Before we get into our shit, um... 464 00:21:05,346 --> 00:21:07,449 I got to tell you, the reason I'm here is, uh... 465 00:21:07,481 --> 00:21:09,250 Joe Buck sent me to come talk... 466 00:21:09,282 --> 00:21:11,719 - Oh! - No fighting! 467 00:21:11,752 --> 00:21:12,986 You chose the wrong side, Butler! 468 00:21:13,019 --> 00:21:14,321 - Jim! - It's okay, kids. 469 00:21:14,355 --> 00:21:16,257 - They're just pretending! - The kids! 470 00:21:16,289 --> 00:21:18,158 They need to see what justice looks like! 471 00:21:18,192 --> 00:21:20,060 Stop it! No fighting! 472 00:21:20,094 --> 00:21:21,395 Right now, it looks like me 473 00:21:21,429 --> 00:21:23,992 beating the shit out of this traitor! 474 00:21:24,344 --> 00:21:28,411 Synced and corrected by Dragoniod for - www.addic7ed.com -