So, we're responding to reports of excessive noise
from this penthouse apartment.
I mean, it's quite hard to explain when we're running up the stairs.
Not that we're puffed or anything like that.
Apparently, there's been a lot of screaming and screeching.
Yeah, but what's the difference between a scream and a screech?
Well, that's a screech.
That's a scream. Got it. OK.
Open up!
Oh, thanks, O'Leary.
I've actually been thinking a lot about my childhood lately.
We went to Rainbow's End,
and my brother made me go on the Fearfall, and I was just...
- I wasn't really ready for it. - I meant the guy behind the door.
Yeah, so... so did i.
- Yeah. - Open up!
- Oh, thank God you're here. - Thank you. Hello.
- Come in. - Thank you.
I called you cos... it came in and... and it did all of this.
It stole my Xbox controller!
Probably a bit old for an Xbox anyway, aren't you, mate?
- What happened to your, uh... - your chest there, sir?
It was trying to take my necklace.
We'll get you some help for that at some stage soon.
So, this thing that did that, how would you describe it?
- I don't know. - It was... some kind of beast.
- You got any other adjectives? - Enormous.
Um, squawking.
OK. And when it came, what did it do?
- It did this. - Yep?
Did this.
Uh, it did this.
- It did this. - Did it do that?
Nah, that was my nephew ... came over last week.
- And it took my chandelier. - Chandelier? Inner-city apartment?
Bit over the top.
This would be the entry and exit point for the beast.
- The door? - The smashed door.
- Hey. - What's that?
O'Leary...
you reckon this could have anything to do with it?
Captions by Able. www.able.co.nz some resynh by 7kozlov
So, there have been a spate of power cuts
in the Brooklyn area, near the wind turbine.
This is what we refer to as brownouts.
What, Parker?
- Nothing, Sarge. - Right.
So, these brownouts...
What's so funny about brownouts, Parker?
Oh, it's... I was... I was just remembering a knock-knock joke.
- And how does that go? - Oh. OK. Well, you start.
- Knock, knock. - Who's there?
Brownouts?
That's not how it goes.
- All right. - So, let's concentrate, please.
There are far more important matters at hand, such as ...
a number of unusual robberies have been occurring across the city.
Shiny objects missing, such as silverware, cutlery, DVDs
and something else far more upsetting.
- Yes. - Ellington?
- Where's that? - Well, it's here, Minogue.
- Clearly, somebody stole the W. - It could've been an Aucklander.
Hmm. What are they gonna do with a W?
What have you got there?
- Quill. - Where did you get that?
We should probably talk to you about it, Sarge.
Wow. I thought, 'Well, that doesn't seem that threatening,'
but upon seeing this...
I mean, we thought it could be extremely threatening.
Yeah. Especially if you're really ticklish,
like in the armpit or on your leg.
We think what we encountered was pretty scary, actually, Sarge.
It had trashed a man's apartment ...
- Made a real mess. - It was messy.
Took some notes, and we found out that it was enormous
and also squawking.
And I spoke to a witness who said, 'I only just got here just now.
'I don't know what you're talking about.'
Right.
Ah. I've, uh, invited someone who I think may be able to help us.
Uh, you can come in. Just let me, uh, use our special unlocking mechanism.
Blip!
Doors unlocked.
Come in.
Minogue, O'Leary, this is Beverly Hatupatu.
- She is an endangered-bird expert. - Kia or a.
- Kia or a, Beverly. - Kia or a.
- Please close the door. - It's a secret door.
Office secure.
- Here. If you will. - Oh! That's an incredible specimen.
Sarge. Sarge, are you sure she should be in here?
I mean, you told us we had to get special clearance
- to come in here and... - It's OK. I trust her.
I met her on an internet bird forum.
- Oh, is that what Twitter is? - No, no.
You're very lucky to have found this.
- It's a moa, isn't it? Is it moa? - This is a tertiary pennae volatus.
- That's a kind of bird, is it? - It's a flight feather.
'Tertiary' means that it's the smallest feather of the wing.
And judging by the colouring, this thing's female.
I think I know what you're dealing with here. She's very dangerous.
She can swallow you whole in one go, just... just like a...
Down you go.
My great-great-great-great-great- great-great-great-great-great-great-
great-great-great-great-great- great-great-great-great-great-great-
great-great-great-great- great-great-great-great-
great-great-great-grandfather encountered it many moons ago.
- She really likes her grandfather. - I mean, this is incredible.
- Are you into birds? - Oh, you know. I dabble.
It's also been taking a lot of shiny things,
possibly to build a nest.
There's also the issue of power cuts and wind surges.
Wind could be its source of power, and that's...
...why she chose Wellington.
- ...chose Wellington. - Mm.
Ms. Hatupatu, what is our tactical approach
- for capturing whatever this is? - I have an idea.
- What is it? - I will avenge my whanau.
Uh, excuse me? Can you speak up?
I will ensure the safety of this creature
and make sure that we capture it in a humane manner
OK. And how will you do that?
I've spent my entire life searching...
So, Beverly's just baiting the trap at the moment
with really shiny objects. Um, she's had to improvise a little bit,
but sometimes simple is actually best,
so I really respect her for that.
Um, we know that the creature has an affinity towards shiny things,
so we're gonna use the iconic Wellington Fern Ball sculpture
to attract her here to this location,
and then hopefully she'll land
when she sees the really attractive, um, objects.
And then we just pull the rope...
- and we'll trap her in the box. - Yeah.
I've given up some of my most prized possessions to help the cause.
Um, often, that's what policing is, isn't it?
Is, um, you give up the things that matter to you the most
in order to try and protect the community
- as much as you possibly can. - Mm.
In this case, it includes some Andre Rieu live CDs,
which are... some real classics in there;
also my handcuffs, which I never really use;
I found some paper clips; um...
She's near.
It's almost time.
It appears that she's, uh, getting closer.
We do think that she would have to be a real birdbrain
to fall for this, so it might just work perfectly.
The most important part is to not hurt her, OK?
It'll be much more helpful for the ornithological research
- and for my iwi. - So, do you know what she is?
She's a Birdwoman.
Kurangaituku.
She held my great-great-great-great- great-great-great-great-great-great-
great-great-great-great- great-great-great-great-
great-great-grandfather hostage.
She's half woman, half bird,
the size of a tree, with claws like knives.
Very powerful ... and, like, extremely dangerous.
- You say she's as big as a tree. - Do you mean like a real little tree?
I'm just wondering as well ... like, when you said knives,
do you mean like really small knives?
Or like spoons?
Ha. Awesome.
- They should've set the trap by now. - I'm gonna call them.
Uh, can we please move this cage, Parker?
Why did you bring this bird in for anyway?
That's my budgie, Paul.
I thought we could study his behaviour and it might help us.
I don't see the value of that,
- to be honest. - Oh, OK.
- I would just like the... - Oh.
- ...cage to be removed from the... - Oh.
Sorry, Paul.
- What do you think he's thinking? - No idea.
- What do you think he's thinking? - Yeah.
I'm thinking he's thinking, 'Wow. Sarge looks like a great guy.
'I wouldn't mind living at his place.'
So, we're just playing a waiting game.
There's no sign of the bird just yet.
- Who is it? - Sarge.
- Yeah, gidday, Sarge. - What does he want?
- Yeah, we're all good. - Yeah, just playing the waiting game.
- I'm not really sure of the rules. - Wh...?
Beverly?
- Yeah, she's all good. - Whoa!
Yeah, she's playing the waiting game too.
Yeah.
Yeah. OK.
Yep, No, gotta go.
Gotta go.
Ta-ta.
Where's Beverly gone?
There!
- That Birdwoman's got her. - Come on! In pursuit! Let's go.
No, no. Run, run, run, run! It's faster. Come on, this way!
- It's faster in a straight line! - OK. Right. OK, OK.
It's faster in a straight line.
- See? - Pull me up.
- I'll get down. - I'll give you a hand up.
One, two, three.
- Up. - Let's run.
- Come on. - This way.
While staking out the Birdwoman, the Birdwoman took the bird woman.
- I'm confused. - We need to find the Birdwoman.
Yeah, but the woman who likes birds or the 'half bird, half woman'?
- Both! - Oh, right.
- I'm gonna grab my stuff. - There's no time, Minogue!
There's some rare CD5 in here, O'Leary.
There's no such thing as a rare CD.
- You wouldn't know. - What do you know about CD5?
You don't even like music.
You don't even let me put music on in the car
most of the time.
Minogue, O'Leary. Come in. Over.
Are you there? Over.
Hello. Minogue, O'Leary, are you there? Over.
Hey, wh...? Hey!
- Whoa, whoa! - Oh!
What did you do that for, Parker?
Well, we have to give him free will. That's how we'll learn.
Well, th-that's a terrible idea.
- Don't worry, Sarge. - I know how to calm him down.
Cheep! Cheep!
Paul's interested.
- That's great. - Cheep, cheep, cheep! Cheep, cheep!
- Cheep, cheep, cheep, cheep, cheep! - You're on to something, Parker.
That's genius!
- Come here, Paul. Cheep, cheep! - Minogue, O'Leary. Come in.
- To the office? - Cheep!
We're actually doing something pretty important here, Sarge.
The Birdwoman has taken the bird woman.
No. 'Come in' as in, 'Listen to me over the radio.'
I have an idea.
- ♪ Cheep, cheep. - Try alluring the Birdwoman
- using mating calls. - ♪ Cheep, cheep. Cheep, cheep.
Hey.
What are you...? Hey!
- Uh, gotta go. Problem in the office. - Copy that.
- OK... No. No. - ♪ Cheep, ch-cheep.
- ♪ Ch-Cheep-cheep, cheep-cheep. ♪ - OK... Parker...
Cheep, cheep, cheep, cheep!
- You think Sarge is OK? - He sounds pretty stressed.
And he said, 'Try some mating calls.'
- Do you know any? - Nah, not really.
I'm sort of like, 'Hey. How's it going?
'Um, I'm in the Police.
'It's pretty cool.
'Blow into this bag.'
I'm not sure he meant those kinds of mating calls.
I think he meant maybe
something to do with birds.
So maybe there's something in Beverly's book.
There's some pretty detailed drawings in here.
She seems a bit obsessed.
Well, maybe she's just really passionate, you know?
And that's an admirable quality.
Can lead to criminal behaviour, though.
- What, passion? - Obsessive.
Look.
- This one looks like you. - I'm driving.
Yeah. And you're also a birdwoman.
I don't see how a birdwoman could look like me.
Look.
That's distracting me, as a driver.
- Put it down, please. - That looks exactly like you.
I... find that very hard to believe.
Here we go ... mating calls.
- What does that say? - I'm driving.
Yeah. Use your left eye.
It says,
'Caaaawww!'
- I think. - You might be right.
Caw! Caw!
I'm not a threat to you, Paul.
Uh-oh. Here, boy.
- Oh no. - Hey. Hey, he's going over there.
- Oh, he's going to the office! - He's gone into the office!
- GRUNTS, PANTS: It's all right. - On your feet, Officer.
Oh, it's all right.
- I'm just a little bit stunned. - Where'd he go?
- Ohh... - Oh!
- Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Hey, hey, hey.
Here we are. Whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa.
Here.
Hey, buddy. Hey, buddy.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Paul!
As you can see, the bird is still at large in the office.
Yep. Yep, you...
That's on you. Try more of the, uh...
...the French seduction.
'Le... Le cheep. Le cheep-cheep.'
- Oh. Oh-la-la. - 'Le cheep-cheep. Oh-la-i... cheep.'
Ch-Cheep.
- Ch-Cheep. - Yeah. More sass.
Yeah.
Brrr! Brrr!
- What is that? - Brr... It's a bird call.
- Sounds like a phone. - Doesn't sound like a phone.
Do it properly. That's not how you do it. You can do better than that.
Brrr! Brrr!
Let me have a go.
Eeee! Eeee!
- No, it's not working. - Look, we've got to try harder.
The endangered bird expert is in danger.
So she's endangered?
Yeah. She's an endangered endangered bird expert.
Let me have another turn. One more.
Krrrraaw! Krrraw!
Do you think that was her, Minogue?
I reckon it was, O'Leary.
Did Sarge tell us what to do if we attracted the Birdwoman?
No.
- She's getting closer. - It's getting really, really loud.
Eyes on bird! Eyes on bird!
Sarge, we found her. O'Leary did an amazing bird call.
Do it again, O'Leary.
- No, it wasn't like that. - It was more sort of like...
Aaargh!
- Don't like it. Don't like it. - Whoa! Whoa!
I wanna get down!
- Just calm down, Minogue. - Calm down.
Just breathe. Yeah, good. Good.
You breathe too, Beverly. Breathe!
Hey! Help me! Ohhh!
- Seatbelts off? - Copy.
Oof!
- Don't do that. - Help.
- I don't think we should move. - I agree. We should not move.
I'll count to three, and then we'll both leap out of the car as one.
- What are you doing? - Getting my jacket.
We don't need our jackets.
I've already lost three this month.
I'm not gonna lose another one. They cost a fortune.
You ready?
- Three, tw... - Come on, O'Leary!
What...? Minogue!
You're sitting on my face!
- You all right? - Yeah, I'm good.
- No, I'm good. - Am I OK?
- What? - Am I OK?
- Are you OK? Are you OK? - Yeah, I think so.
Yeah. You look good.
O'Leary. The car.
- The car. The car. - Ah.
- The car. The car. - Yep.
God... Look out!
Heads!
Um, so it looks as though the, uh, woman bird has enormous strength
and is very dangerous to pedestrians.
Um, we need to apprehend the suspect as soon as possible
to, um, save Beverly,
and we'd also like to warn the public
about the potential dangers of falling patrol cars.
Looks like she's heading to the wind turbine.
She must be messing with it
and causing all the power outages in Brooklyn. We've got to get there.
Yeah, but how? I'm not sure the car's gonna be all right.
No, no. What... What are you doing?
I was just seeing if we could still take the car, but no.
- No. - We need another plan.
- Busy night tonight, driver? - Not too bad.
Did you guys hear about that cop car
that fell off the Majestic Centre tonight?
No. I haven't caught up with that one.
Crazy. You'd expect your cops to be the first ones to...
We need to get to the Brooklyn Wind Turbine.
I know. Uh, you entered it into the app.
See that little computer there, O'Leary?
- Yeah, that's... - That's how it works with Uber.
- You see that blue line? - Just all goes in there.
- I understand Uber... - Yeah, and you load it...
- That's for the... -.and I don't need to be
- mansplained about Uber. - ...path, the direction.
No, that's not mansplaining.
Mansplaining is when you over-explain something
that's really simple, um, when it always comes from a man,
- um, to a woman. - Yeah.
- Sort of the difference is... - with that
was it was explaining something that was a little bit more complicated.
. When you grasp a concept.
- Break it down to little parts... - Yeah.
...and explain those little parts in small detail.
Sarge, come in.
Come in, Sarge.
Argh!
- Here, Paulie. Here, boy! Come down! - PARKER, PANTING: Oh, gosh.
- So stuffy... chasing birds. - Come down!
OK.
- Hey. Over there. Over there. - Oh. Oh, God.
OK. Move forward.
the police.
What are you teaching this bird, Parker?
- It's not actually mine. - It's my Uncle Trev's.
I'm just bird-sitting.
Clearly your Uncle Trevor doesn't have any respect
- for our profession whatsoever. - the police!
- So, this is not appropriate. - It is not on.
- Come on. - Here we go. Get in the...
- the police! - Get in the cage, Paul!
- The police! - You know what? Look,
I think we've done everything we can.
- The police! - I think everybody just stand down,
all right? We just stand down...
- the police! - ...until this bird calms down.
- The police! - Aargh!
Look out for the fan!
Is it dead?
Uh, regrettably, the assailant was resisting
and using quite offensive language and is now a casualty.
Moving forward, I think we will take steps to inform the next of kin,
um, what has transgressed here.
Unfortunately, the... the... this is a result of, uh,
sometimes what we deal with in the New Zealand Police.
Hey, Sarge, we've followed the Birdwoman
to the Brooklyn Wind Turbine.
- Roger that. - Heading over now.
Uber driver dropped us miles away.
Hey, look.
Yeah. I mean, obviously, um, potentially,
because this creature is a birdwoman,
she might not be aware of the fact that all of this stuff
is actually recyclable.
Um, so I guess we'll just give her a warning for that
when we catch up with her.
- Did you hear that? - Yeah.
Waiho tenei wahi!
That's Maori for, 'Leave this place.'
Beverly must be right ... she is Kurangaituku.
- Well, we could leave this place. - I mean, she asked nicely.
- We've gotta rescue Beverly. - Yeah, but the Birdwoman
- eats people, I hear. - That's why we've gotta keep going.
Well, that could be the reason why we don't go.
Leave the springs.
Can I get them on the way back?
- I won. - It's not a competition.
Look ... a giant nest.
Do you think it's related to the giant bird?
Yes.
Then one of us is probably gonna have to go up there.
We're both going. Come on.
Looks to be faeces of an avian nature.
Do you think if she pooed on you, it'd still be considered good luck?
Could be a considerably large amount of good luck.
Good |uck'd be absolutely dripping off you.
- Ascending ladder. - Go, go, go, go, go.
Safely ... ascending ladder safely.
Fingers.
Maybe we should just...
take the 'W' and go.
There's Beverly.
Take Beverly and the 'W' and go.
I ki atu ahau kia kaua e haere mai ki konei!
Uh, good evening.
I'm Officer O'Leary. This is Officer Minogue.
- Uh, we're here to help you. - You are actually interrupting.
- So... - Or visiting,
- depending on how you look at it. - Yeah.
- Oh, kei te pai, kei te pai. - MINOGUE, O'LEARY: Yeah.
- Got any biscuits? - Uh...
Sarge.
- What the...? - I got stitch!
- Sgt Maaka. - I got stitch.
Maybe I should just deploy tranquiliser, Sarge.
Don't you dare hurt my beautiful babies.
She's a mother.
Oh. Aue! Haere mai.
- It's feeding time. - Excuse me, Birdwoman.
That's, uh, Beverly. She's a member of the public.
You can't just let your chicks ingest her in that fashion.
Well, of course not.
I'm going to swallow her, and then I'm gonna regurgitate her,
like this.
OK, I think
- we really have to help her. - Wait. Sarge,
- there's a big fan outside. - You're right, Parker.
We can't have a repeat of what happened to Paul.
Never again.
We've gotta time this just right.
Uh, tena koe, Kurangaituku.
Don't you dare come any closer.
Ugh. Come into my house, try and steal my food ... aue!
To be fair, you did whoosh and break into multiple homes
and steal many shiny objects.
You know what? My instincts as a bird wants to eat you right now,
- so you'd better hush-hush, girl. - Uh, hey. Whoa, whoa.
Uh, kia tau, kia tau I te manu wahine ataahua.
Ooh. Aue!
Don't try to smooth-talk me, handsome.
I might gobble you up too.
- Sarge, you're blushing. - She might take that as a threat.
Just trying to calm her down, Parker.
Do you have a clear shot?
- Affirmative. - Enough talk.
You've interrupted my dinner time.
- Deploy the tranquiliser, Parker! - Take the shot! Take the shot!
Why?
- Parker, you got Sarge. - Why did you shut your eyes?
Get away. Get away, please.
I didn't want her babies to see me shooting her,
so I just kind of went like this
- and went like that. - Aargh!
Parker.
OK, gun down.
Tranquiliser down.
- Tranquiliser away. - OK.
Oh, that... Away. Down.
- Good result... - Argh! Oh no.
Um, so, obviously, here in the Police,
we just are here to look after the community ...
all members of the community. So, yes, we had officers down,
um, but it was all for a good cause,
- and it was to save you, Beverly... - Oh!
- ...and Birdwoman. - It's all good. All good, bubs.
And, um, that's all part of the service that we provide.
The, uh, New Zealand Police.
Um, end of the day, though, I think... good result.
Sometimes in our investigations, we realise we have more in common
with the paranormal than you'd think.
Mm. I mean, in this case, yes, she does feed on the blood of innocents,
um, but she's also a solo mother
just trying to navigate her way through life.
And, yes, she does have the body of a bird,
but she also has the head of a woman ...
a woman just trying to feed her kids.
I mean, looking back through Ms. Hatupatu's notes,
we did find several mentions of her...
- ...wanting to seek revenge - Hey! Hey. Oi!
For a generations-long feud between
- No! - ...her family and the Birdwoman's.
But she's since changed her attitude,
um, and agreed to study the creature for science,
um, as it's no longer deemed as a threat to her
- or her family. - Mm.
And I think, end of the day, it was a tremendous
group effort by the team.
- Yeah, that's right, O'Leary. - We did it.
You can't spell 'Wellington Paranormal Unit' without 'we'.
Uh, there's no I's in there.
There's a couple.
Yeah, that's hardly any, though.
That's gross.
- But I guess it's kind of cute. - Well...
Where's Beverly?
Ms. Hatupatu?
Krrrrr!
Ms. Hatupatu?
Eight, seven,