Downloaded from YTS.MX
Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX
I'm here. Hey? I'm here.
My name is Stella.
I live in Rome. And in a month I'll be 112 years old.
My years are counted like those of dogs.
Each year gets multiplied by seven,
so 16 equals 112.
The life expectancy of dogs
is around 16 years, so I don't have much time left.
-Stella? -I'm up!
You got that right.
I'll be dead in a month.
He is Piedino. We're the same age,
thus the same life expectancy.
He's so old he stopped running.
-Stella? -Coming!
Good morning. Why the long face?
Since my father passed, my mother Rita, an accountant,
entrusts the furthest thing from math,
tarot cards.
Actually, fake tarot cards, since her deck has 21 major arcana, not 22.
Then there's my sister Ludovica.
She is 18 and is the perfect one.
Good grades, boys, and many years to live.
More than me, for sure.
The dog's naked, but better dressed than you.
And he's lame, but he still walks without a stick up his ass.
How long's this thing staying with us?
His name is Piedino.
But don't worry, we're adult dogs.
When our moment comes, we'll die alone.
Sweetheart, why don't we organize you a nice birthday party?
It may turn into a wake, mom.
DOG YEARS
Hey, fucking hell. Watch out!
I cherish anonymity.
I need to go. I have an oral exam.
-I'll see you later. -I have tutoring.
-Tomorrow? -Training.
-Then? -The game.
I'll see you... later.
You're like my mother at the hairdresser.
Why?
She says the secret is to tire them.
Happy birthday!
What?
I've been thinking that I'll be 16 soon.
So?
You know what happens.
My darling!
Stella?
Are you crazy?
You're so stupid. Look what you did.
This must have been the high point of your day.
Idiot.
I'm so ashamed. What are you laughing at?
They're not gonna fine you for some spilled coffee.
Nina, it spilled on her. Do you understand?
It's Federica. She's a bitch.
A bitch who's right.
-I've had an out of body experience. -What?
Yes, earlier. I saw my funeral.
-I'll see you at the park at 3:00 p.m. -Okay.
Nina, listen.
This may be the last month of my life.
And today I've realized that I'm behind everyone else.
You'll bury me.
And my epitaph will say,
"Stella, a loving friend, always friendly, but she did absolutely nothing."
I can't waste any more time.
Actually, I've made a bucket list of things I want do before I die.
Look, a few goals.
What do you think?
Go on.
I don't know. I mean...
-Something's missing. -What?
Falling in love, a boyfriend,
a romantic dinner.
They're not there for a reason, Nina.
-Really? -Truly.
It's up to you. It may be a great success or a huge tragedy.
Can you pull it off?
Of course I can.
What do I have to lose?
Number one: stop being invisible.
You look like a drunk rainbow.
It's part of the plan.
We must go out with someone who's not you and me, remember?
Federica and the Martas? It's a shitty idea.
And to become friends, you need time, sacrifice, dedication...
You can't just...
Why?
-I haven't heard from him in five days. -I told you, get rid of him.
Yes, Marta is right. Get rid of him, find someone else.
I'm telling you as a friend, like another Marta.
-Right? -Sure.
The idea of class after the party tomorrow kills me. It's crazy.
I can go for you.
You didn't understand. I'm giving the class.
-On Sunday morning at... -Done!
But Nina and I can come to the party.
You're unleashed today.
Tomorrow, 10:30 p.m. at Marta's.
Okay.
The theme is animals.
Which Marta?
Did you ask which class? What if she's messing with you?
We have more important things to think about. Come on.
Stella, please.
-You put some thought into it. -Hi.
Don't forget tomorrow. I'll send you the address.
Yes. By the way, what's the class?
Why do I feel we're making a mistake?
Listen, since we're here, why don't you check off the kiss?
Aren't you an Amazonian royal flycatcher?
-Go on! -Fine.
But first I'll get a drink. A beer.
Yes. I'll stay here.
I'll explore this hostile planet.
Do you need help?
Yes, thank you.
Now I can say that a sea cow opened a beer for me.
-What an honor, right? -Yes.
-I cut myself. It burns. -Are you hurt?
-It burns. I can't look at it. -Wait...
-Look up? -Yes.
Wait.
-What are you doing? -I'm putting on a band aid.
Okay.
I always have them. You never know. Is it better?
-Yes. -Okay.
Thank you.
See? Now I can say that I saved an endangered species.
Thanks again.
-Thank you. -Enjoy the party.
You too.
What?
Are you Drakgor?
No. I'm an Amazonian royal flycatcher.
Nice costume!
Yes, I'm Drakgor!
You're wild. I like you!
Thanks.
Can you take my place? Here.
Want to go upstairs?
-I'll follow you? Okay. -Follow me.
-Do you want some? -No.
So?
What's your name?
-Stella. -Stella.
Giulio. Nice to meet you.
When I saw you there
looking at me, I thought you didn't like the music.
-No. No. -Was it that?
-You can tell me. -No.
You can say it. I don't want to be a DJ.
I do it because you can meet people.
-But... -You met someone, right?
-Yes. -See?
-What do you want to do? -The photographer.
I'd like to do exhibitions.
-Nice. -Yes, nice.
-What about you? -What?
What do you want to do in the future?
Well, you need to get there.
Did I actually ask you that?
I mean... What should we do now?
-You don't like me? -No.
It's that I like what you like.
Nina.
We need to leave.
Put this here. What a mess.
-Stella. -It was a mess.
-Let's go. -Where?
-Stella? -We're in a rush.
Okay, but let's say goodbye.
I'll show you a cool place. I swear.
Do you want to?
Bye. Thank you.
-Thank you so much. -Good evening.
-Bye. -Bye.
-Thank you, Giulio. -What for?
-Do you want one now? -Yes.
You as well?
Thanks.
Is this really your favorite place?
No.
It's the only place open now that has grape juice.
Why, what time is it?
-Fuck, it's 4:00 a.m.! -Fuck, the class!
-What class? -Stella has something to do.
-What are you doing? -What's that?
A bucket list.
Graffiti something. Milk a cow. Get a job interview.
Win at the casino, drive a car, fuck.
How long do you have?
-A month. -You can't make it.
-Don't we have to go? -What did I say?
-Nothing. We need to go, so... -Nina!
The stranger is right.
I won't make it.
I'll be consumed by panic attacks and stay behind everyone else.
I'll die without checking off anything.
Die?
What do you mean?
My years are counted like dogs' years.
I'll be 16 soon, and that is 112 for me.
Got it? That's the reason for the list.
That's why I embarrassed myself all day.
That's why I went to a party dressed like an Amazonian royal flycatcher
and why I kissed a gay guy.
Well...
Maybe you think it's just a bad day, that I can get through it, but no.
No, Giulio. Tell my mother it's just a bad day.
She treats me like a fucking major arcana.
Or tell my sister, who thinks I have no hope.
Tell them it's just a bad day.
Because I try every day and I feel I cannot breathe.
Stella, can I tell you something?
I've read it in a book.
In your head, what you think it's true, it's true. Or it will be.
If you think you can't make it, people will think the same.
It'll come true and you're fucked.
Think you can make it, without fear.
KISS A HANDSOME GAY GUY
You think so?
Every single word.
And I'm part of this. With Nina.
We're the Ste-Giu-Ni.
Stegiuni!
I don't want to say we're infinite because it's trite.
But really, we are.
Thank you.
Are we sure she's okay?
Is she ill?
It's something she needs to overcome.
How can we help?
By making her feel better.
Good morning. Sorry. There are no courses in the morning here, right?
-It's a senior center. -Over there.
It can't be true.
-Good morning. -Good morning.
-She's not the usual girl. -No, sorry. Federica is not well.
I'm covering for her.
Do we start with cross-stitching?
Let's get to know each other first. Shall we go around and say our names?
-I'm Stella. -Fulvia.
-Rita. -Rosanna.
-Carla. -Peppe.
Marina.
-Alex. -Anna.
Nice to meet you.
Okay, I'll let you work. All right?
I'll sit here.
If you need anything, I'm here.
-Sorry. Can you help me thread a needle? -Yes.
Great question. Well done, Maria!
Rosanna!
Rosanna. So...
-Is she high? -I think so.
Let's take the needle.
It has a hole.
Once the tread is in,
we can start working.
We can get to work.
Good. I like you.
I'll sit here. I'll check on you in a bit.
I'll start on mine.
Good morning.
Good morning, miss.
Social services.
They called us for the mistreatment of elderly people.
-Sorry? -I'm kidding. I'm Matte.
I also run a class here.
Federica told me she'd send someone, but not your name.
-I'm Stella. You're funny. -Nice to meet you.
-They were terrorized. -I'm sorry.
Have we met before?
No, I don't think so.
-I'll help you. -Thank you.
-What is it? -Sorry?
Nothing.
I messed up the cross-stitching.
Well, the first time is tough for everyone.
How do you know?
Are you a cross-stitching expert?
No.
-Maybe a bit. -No, wait.
Are you the greatest tailor of our generation?
Yes, I am.
Canvas and rag embroidery expert.
-You're serious? -Yes.
Why embroidery? You're a guy, it's a bit strange.
I spent a lot of time with my grandma when my parents were away for work.
Of course.
But look, for next time...
It's not difficult.
-You must follow a pattern. -Okay.
You must draw a series of X's next to each other.
You do a row and trace it back.
You follow a path.
Then you go over it.
If you make a mistake, you need to undo everything...
Got it?
You should do tutorials.
-You're mean. -Why?
I enjoy it here more.
You teach an embroidery class here?
Yes.
You know my secret. So, you either tell me one of yours or I'll have to kill you.
Okay.
I own the ugliest dog in central Italy.
He's ugly, old, and in a bad shape.
Is that a secret?
-How ugly can it be? -I'll show you.
Well, he's a bit ugly.
Fuck, it's very late. I need to go, I have something to do.
Not another class for the elderly or I'll call social services.
You're the mean one, now.
Oh, bye, sea cow.
They're beautiful!
-It's hot! -Right.
-Can I have one with jam? -Yes, there is...
There's honey, chocolate, jam, syrup...
-What's this? -Well, what's this?
-Waffles for everyone! -Did you do something?
It's a special Monday. A new phase of my life begins.
Let's see in 24 hours.
-Why do you say that? -Because, in 24 hours,
she'll hate her life again.
She'll blame us and blah, blah, blah.
Fuck you, Ludo!
-Wow. That was a record. -Yes, fuck you!
Leave her alone, Ludovica.
Stella is facing something big, something new.
But I'm sure that, with her strength,
-she'll overcome future problems. -Overcome future problems.
I'm not one of you tarots.
Let's see if you'll understand.
Mom, she's right.
She's not a tarot card.
She believes she's a dog.
A dog, Mom!
And you still think it's an astral phase.
She behaves this way for a reason.
You can't face it either, but she's 16.
What do I share with those in The Wilds?
The castaway look.
A messy family that doesn't believe in me and also hinders my dreams.
I won't let them come between me and the list, because...
I forgot, something happened yesterday.
It's a small thing. I just forgot to tell you.
-I met a... -Stella?
-Matte, hi. -Hi!
-Hi. -Hi.
Hi.
-Hi. -Yes.
I'll see you later.
-Yes, we were going to class. -This is not our class.
-It is. -Bye.
Listen. I wanted to show you something.
-Cute. -Right? Yes.
It should help you stitch the ugliest dog in central Italy.
-Thank you. -You're welcome.
-I have class now. -Yeah, sure.
-Bye. -Bye.
-Thank you! -Don't mention it.
Stella, it's classic love at first sight.
What love at first sight?
If you say so.
-Do you like this one? Look. -Yes, it's nice.
You didn't even look!
You know what? I'll use this
for my next exhibition titled,
"A friend who doesn't listen as she thinks about Matte."
No, I'm not thinking about him.
Okay, maybe just a little.
But I'm sure I don't like him.
When you like someone you think about them all the time.
-Right? -Are you asking for a friend?
If you want, be with him.
I'd never do it, though. I don't want to always be with just one person.
Well, unless he's an introspective guy
who loves books and is musically talented.
And is very mature for his age. Elio.
Well. Anyway, Matte is hot.
Like last time, but he was gay.
I'd be happy if you fell in love. I'm saying it for you.
When you fall in love you start feeling
strange things, like butterflies in your stomach...
Yes, sure, all these things. He is handsome, fine. And later?
Later there are fights, jealousy...
He forgets your star sign, or worse... he disappears.
Wait. I have no plan to fall in love.
This should be clear.
Stella, it's too late.
The more you try not to think of him, the more you fall in love.
It will becomes an obsession.
Years will go by. We'll meet again at Giulio's first exhibit at MoMA,
and you'll still talk about Matte.
Stella, don't waste time.
Be smart. Finish the checklist. Sleep with him and forget about him.
-No emotional attachment. -And the most important goal checked off.
-But no emotional attachment. -No emotional attachment.
No emotional attachment.
-Nina? -Yes?
You're the only one here in a stable relationship.
-Yes... -And so...
Yes, we do it. I mean, we don't do it.
-What? -Some.
-Some? -Some means some. This is mine, Stella.
All right, okay.
I must do all by myself. Thank you!
-So, tomorrow... -Wait, I'll be Matte.
Okay.
When I see him, I'll approach him.
And without beating around, I'll tell him...
Asshole!
It's clear. They volunteer together,
she knows his secret and he's not ashamed.
Can you relax?
Wait, what secret?
I can't tell you, it's confidential.
Giulio is taking a big risk being in the girls bathroom.
Have you finished?
The marvels of love.
You have two options now.
You can be Taylor Swift and write an album that makes us cry.
Or you can be Cardi B and show him who's boss. Now.
It's not the best plan.
I mean, no one will ask me to do a TEDx.
But if it works, who cares.
Phase one.
Know your enemy.
What does Federica like? Concerts, vintage clothes, RuPaul.
Federica is the kind of girl who'd
like to confess her secrets to someone who represents a cliché,
the gay friend.
-No, I mean... -What?
A RuPaul T-shirt!
Of course. You like RuPaul?
-You can't imagine how much. -Really?
Phase two. Coffee, intrigue, secrets...
She tells you about a crisis with Matte because of another guy that she likes.
She tells you his name, surname, address.
Giulio should work for the FBI.
Phase three. Inform Matte.
Social media's a good way to ruin someone's life.
You can send a message from a fake profile.
He supports Udinese?
I was alone. He was there, you weren't. What was I supposed to do?
-Sure. Good. -Matte!
And now it's my turn.
God. Did I exaggerate?
What if he's really hurt?
What now? What does a guy do when he finds out he was cheated on?
I can picture Matte spending days wearing the same cargo pants.
Hours spent watching the best Udinese goals.
De Bernardi passes the ball. Goal!
And then... there's porn.
Always on those websites. Right, Matte?
Porn and soccer, soccer and porn.
And when you think you feel better, your favorite playlist messes you up
with the wrong song.
God, Matte. I'd like to know how you are.
I'm good. Yes.
What are you doing here?
Have you been crying?
A little, earlier. Because I came third with Udinese.
-It was like in 2010. Thanks. -Great!
Is that right?
You know the Udinese anthem?
I love anthems. I collect them.
-You collect soccer teams' anthems... -Do you want to go out with me?
I can sing other ones for you.
-Well, I'll go. -Let's go out.
Yes, let's go out together.
-Okay. -Okay.
-Bye. -Bye.
Yes!
No errors allowed. It'll be perfect.
I'll plan every little detail.
Are you ready?
Are you sure?
Isn't it too early? What if you're disappointed?
If your feet are cold, will you wear socks? No!
No socks, right?
No, no socks.
It must be perfect. That's all.
Yes, I must hide my feet. Absolutely!
Yes?
Sweetheart, these are yours.
Yes. Put them over there.
Thanks.
Well...
And these! Voilà!
I need to change the picture of the dog.
I didn't know it's 1980.
Come on, sweetheart. We can organize something here!
On the terrace. We can order giant pizzas.
We'll have some music. Even just for a few guests.
Can you promise you'll think about it?
Okay, all right.
-What? -Nothing.
I was thinking that he looks better with short hair.
-You think? -Yes.
No, because he's always been like this.
-How are you, sweetheart? -I'm good. Yes.
-All good at school? -Very.
Do you have any new friends?
-Nina? -All is good, Mom!
But I'm busy now!
-Okay? -Fine.
Can I help you with something? Maybe with your hair?
Sweetheart, you don't have to be embarrassed.
At your age I was very hairy. I had a moustache.
This should be vertical. It must follow the direction...
There were no instructions. So I put it this way.
-Don't touch. -Getting ready for something?
No, it's for a challenge.
-What? -A challenge, Mom.
A date?
No, a challenge. If you don't know what it is, it's not my problem.
-No, it's my problem. -Yes.
Anyway, the hot one is better. It opens the pores.
-I didn't find it. -Okay.
-Put some baby powder on it. -Can you leave?
Thank you!
Okay, waxing was a bad idea.
If needed, I accept the pain.
What I cannot accept is that he wore Lycra shorts.
-Is that Lycra? -Yes.
I never felt the Lycra texture.
-Can I? Are you sure? -Yes, please.
It's nice.
-It's comfortable. -Yes, it's cool.
It's elastic.
-What about this? -This is Gore-Tex.
It's great. It keeps you warm, but you don't sweat.
You can pedal forever...
Have you ever thought about cycling around the world?
No.
He's slow.
We were there. And he kept talking.
Talk, talk, talk!
I wanted to tell him,
"I like you and you like me. What's the issue? Take me, do something!"
-But you didn't, right? -No.
Let's analyze the situation.
On one side we have Matte,
his Lycra pants, his slowness, and possible homosexuality.
On the other side we have Stella,
her aggressiveness, her burning loins, and ten miles for a shag.
Stella, I don't get it.
Give him another chance.
I have three weeks. At this pace, I'll never fuck.
-Stella? -What?
You must end it. You'll never make it with him.
It's Matte. He's...
He wants to see me, he'll organize something nice. He said nice.
I mean, a slow person says "nice" before saying "sexy," right?
You're going out. You know that, right?
We're not going out.
You know what people do when they go out?
-Hi. -Hi.
You look beautiful.
And you are... tone on tone.
Thank you.
-Shall we go in? -Yes, sure.
Do you like it?
Yes.
It's nice, yes.
-Where are we? -It's a surprise.
-There's no one here. -It's all for us.
THEATER ELISEO
-Really? -Please.
-Should I sit? -Or we can eat standing.
-No. -Yes.
Okay.
-The menu. -Yes.
STARTERS: SEXUAL FANTASIES
COURSE 1: EPIC FUCK-UPS
COURSE 2: FAVORITE THINGS
What is this?
So, every dish has a topic.
We tell something about ourselves.
If one doesn't say anything, no food.
You shouldn't have done this to me.
-Ready? -Fuck.
Let's begin with a starter.
-Your sexual fantasies. -This is crazy.
I'll start.
-Do it with Dua Lipa. -Me too!
You too?
I mean, do it with a Dua Lipa song in the background.
-Okay. -Okay?
Yes, now...
Now it makes sense.
All right, good!
First test passed.
I only thanked the first girl who kissed me. It's not a tragedy, right?
-No, it's worse. -You're mean.
I can't compete.
I once said "fuck" in church, and everyone heard it.
And they still let you in?
I was there for other reasons.
Let's continue.
"My favorite things that no one knows."
They're too many.
I'll start...
Sharknado, ugly dogs,
and the top 50 songs of Thailand, Malaysia and Ecuador.
Sharknado?
I like shark movies, okay?
And I'm terrified of sharks.
"We need a bigger boat!"
Okay.
All right, okay.
What else scares you?
That's not on the menu.
But if you don't tell me, no food.
I'd say solitude. Yes.
I'm a bit worried about being alone.
So, last course? What do you say?
"Something about yourself you've never told anyone."
I'll start, okay?
I told you I spent a lot of time with my grandma as a child.
Yes, you did.
Well, I cried a lot, and she hated it.
Once she called me "crybaby" in front of all my friends.
I haven't cried ever since.
Except when...
When she died. I cried for a week.
It's nothing major, but I've never told anyone.
Are you okay?
There's something that messed things up.
What?
My father...
Dad was, we were...
-Dad... -Stella. Hey.
Don't worry.
All is fine, okay?
Don't worry.
Tell me the truth. This was your goal, right?
Find out my shit, put me on the spot, say all is fine and be the mature one?
-What goal? -Don't say anything.
All this crap of going one step at a time. I don't want to know you, Matte!
Okay? And I don't want you to know me!
Fuck Matte. I'll tell you tomorrow.
Fuck!
We must go back to our lives before Matte.
No, Stella. It's all good.
I understand the waste of time, I understand the slowest guy in the world.
I understand the checklist. But...
Can't we see what Matte did for you?
He's a rare breed!
The body of a Riverdale character and the soul of John Green.
Someone needs love here.
Nina, Stella is right. We must care about what's important.
GET A JOB INTERVIEW
Detergent company, 420 employees, the owner Tian Zhang is Marta's father.
Girls, are you sure?
Not even my assistant found your e-mail.
Marta would have told me.
Yes, Stella is here for an interview.
Is my dad here?
So annoying, there's no one.
Can't you do it online?
You think Amazon will send the DJ to my house?
I need my dad's card to pay for food, alcohol and music.
It's a villa, play music with your phone.
Are you listening to yourself? Not at my place.
Why are you both here?
Because women always go to the toilet in pairs.
In pairs.
I don't mean your office is a toilet, even if you make intimate cleanser.
I wouldn't dare.
-Right? -Yes.
I need this interview, I don't have much time left.
Because she's pregnant!
I mean, it'll show soon.
I don't need to explain to you how this works, right?
Delicate soap for babies.
-Sorry. -Don't speak.
So, how did it go?
Nina went against all rules saying that I'm a single mother,
so a lifetime supply of baby soap is a good achievement. Right?
It says you can use it as an intimate cleanser.
Well, while you've been sorting out things down there for the next ten years,
I got booked as a photographer at Marta Zhang's party.
-No. -No.
Yes! And you're both invited.
Stella, at this party, you'll be able to check off two goals.
First, it's a rich people's party.
-Look at the house. -Wow!
And the most important thing.
You'll lose your virginity!
-With who? -Lorenzo Zhang.
Her younger brother. Hot.
Stella...
Fuck yeah, it's a match!
Fucking hell.
That's cool. I'm sweating.
I'm coming for you.
Wow. Not even porn movies begin like this.
Nice to meet you. I'm Stella.
I'm Lorenzo.
We've never met before.
You mean, before you set your eyes on me?
God, I'm sorry. I'll explain later.
Get closer.
Okay.
Marta will put this on her profile.
If you look good.
-Sorry, is there a waiver? -What?
You're not authorized.
Unless I can get you a drink.
Do you have a villa in Cremasco?
I can see you're feeling better.
I have better things to do. Sorry.
-What a nice dress. -Thank you!
-Who are you? -Nina.
-My God. -Bye.
-Let's go. I want to leave. -Careful. What happened?
-I want to leave. Let's go. -Here's what we'll do. Get a drink.
Can she have a gin tonic, please? And we'll have fun.
We will. I won't leave you alone. Okay?
-Okay? -Okay.
You know what? Marta is fun, I swear.
Let's go. It's about to start!
-What's happening over there? -I don't know.
-No. -Yes! Let's go!
Let's get another one.
Sure, Nina.
Don't worry. I'll find Lorenzo.
Thank you. I want to wish Marta a happy birthday.
Your friends asked me to sing a song. So this is for you.
No, not this. Stop everything.
Nina, let's stop everything.
Let's switch off the power. Let's stop this torture.
-No, Stella. We won't. -Please. Help.
Let's watch the concert. It won't happen again.
I'll take care of it.
Police for Roma Tuscolana, good evening.
Good evening. I'd like to report public indecency.
At a house party. I live near this house, you know?
Madam, a house is not a public place.
Sure, of course... You...
Fuck!
There! Imagine these seconds of darkness as the time needed to learn where you are,
who you are, and how you got to your bed after a party.
Hoping all went well, but with the feeling that it didn't.
A hangover is a long dose of paranoia spiced with a gin tonic and nachos.
NINA LEFT THE GROUP
Shit!
You don't remember anything?
It's understandable. You drunk everything.
But there is good news.
You can't check off fucking, but ruining a party, yes.
-What did I do? -What did you do?
Luckily I took pictures.
What are you doing?
-I need him. -What are you saying? Are you drunk?
I need to check off the most important thing.
You have all your life, I don't.
-You're crazy. I'm taking you home now. -No, you won't.
Thank you, really.
-Thank you all. -Thank you.
See you soon.
Amazing!
Thank you for coming.
But especially, thank you to those who made this an epic party!
Thank you. I saw you dancing.
I saw new couples,
and old ones.
So let's toast to us,
to this party,
and to love!
Why don't we toast to those who are not having any fucking fun?
Why the fuck are you here?
Why don't we toast to those who didn't find love?
Someone do something!
Or to those who had it stolen by their sisters?
We need something more modern.
Against the love lobby. Empowerment!
-Let's do... -Give it to me.
-It's mine!
-No! -Shut up!
Alberto isn't coming to get you, Nina.
-Who's Alberto? -It's Alessandro, Stella.
Wasn't it Alessio?
Fuck off! Ruining the party for everyone wasn't enough?
Nina...
If we don't remember your boyfriend's name is not because we're assholes.
It's because he's never around.
And sorry, at first, I thought you made him up.
Because I'm the one who makes things up here, right?
Who's with Alberto, Alessio or what's his name and he's never around?
You can't admit it to yourself, let alone him.
-Stella... -Stella what?
Look at you. Why do you keep embellishing this crap?
Squash it!
Sweetheart, what happened?
Nothing. Nothing happened.
How long is this torture?
Stella?
Can you tell me what happened?
Ma'am, your daughter sent a girl to the hospital and called us.
She reported herself?
Don't laugh, it's not funny.
It's not funny. This is serious.
I thought it was a phase, but we need to seek help.
-So, let's try... Yes, honey. -No.
We'll find someone good,
someone you can talk to, analyze things. He'll provide you with some tools...
Mom, you're exaggerating.
Yes, it's been an eventful night,
but I swear that I only wanted to fuck.
What?
Ma'am, there are some forms to fill out.
I can't go back to school after this.
Stella, cheer up. Everything will be okay.
What? When?
My birthday is close, the checklist is gone. I have nothing left, Giulio.
You have me. Your best friend.
My only best friend.
You chose a photographer as your only best friend.
He has an exhibition coming up.
You'll take care of promoting it.
Put flyers everywhere, think of nothing else.
Okay.
Who's Davide?
No one.
"No one" wants to come to the exhibition.
And go for a drink after that.
The guy from the party.
-Him? -Him.
-And? -And he's...
Hot, very hot.
-But he... -But what?
Come on. What's wrong with him?
Why don't you go for it?
No.
-I don't want your advice. -I won't give you any.
-Hi. It's Stella, a friend of Giulio's. -No, Stella.
-You don't know how much... -Stella, no.
...he'd like to spend a night with you, but he's afraid to tell you.
-I think... Yes. -Sent?
30 OCT - GIULIO ANGELUCCI EVERY ME & EVERY YOU
You're an asshole, you know that, right?
You left me alone at the dinner and you didn't even apologize.
Not even that, okay?
And you avoided me at the party.
And not only did you avoid me.
-You kissed someone else in front of me. -Matte...
This pushed me back with Federica.
I did it because we're a mess together.
We don't have the same pace either. You're like lightning,
-and I'm slow, very slow. Yes. -You are slow.
Yes, but being with her
made me realize that I like you.
Yes! I like being with you, joking around with you.
Learning things I don't know, like that one can collect teams' anthems.
If you end up in prison for what you did,
I hope you choose me to spend your time off with.
Matte, I don't know how to do it.
What? To be with someone?
I don't know how.
Well, people fight, they make up, and...
-Don't you dare thank me. No! -No.
-What? -Wait there.
Are you okay?
Undress me.
MAKE SMALL TALK* (but I exaggerated)
I wrote a tip for relationships on each shirt.
FIGHT AND ASK WHY AM I DOING THIS!!
MAKE FUN OF EACH OTHER WHEN ONE WEARS SOMETHING AWFUL...
It doesn't count now. No.
ACCEPT THE FLAWS OF THE OTHER PERSON.
-Okay, but... -Wait.
No cycling shorts on a date. Okay?
IF WE CAN'T DO SOMETHING, LET'S SAY SO TACTFULLY!
I got it. Sorry.
WE'LL NEGLECT FAMILY, SCHOOL, BEST FRIENDS
Fuck!
-Fuck! -What?
-Shit! Wait. -Hey.
20 MISSED CALLS FROM GIULIO
-Fuck! -Stella, are you okay?
Hey!
Think of something to say!
Where's my fucking Steve McCurry?
-Giulio, please... -I don't want to talk, Stella.
I'm not even disappointed.
I'm tired.
As you say, there's no perfect love, so there's no perfect friend.
Please. Something happened.
What happened this time?
A sudden death? Your checklist? What?
No. Maybe a love story you don't care about.
Did you tell him the truth? About the dog years?
That you think you're gonna die, so you go fast?
You run so much that you'll ruin the relationship.
Does he know you sent the text that broke them up?
He doesn't, right?
And what's funny is that you didn't do it for love.
You did it for yourself, because you have a checklist
and he's only one of the items. The most important one.
Fuck.
Well done.
Matte...
Time passed as I counted the passing of time.
I counted time to find the time.
The time to make the end acceptable.
But now that it was coming, I knew I had failed.
I'd ruined everything.
I'll be 16 tomorrow.
Now I know how sad my dog years are.
There's too much onion. They'll find out.
Why we are doing this?
Because it's filthy, Dad. And we love filthy.
We should go all in.
Next time, we'll add hot dogs, peppers...
So if Mom and Ludo find out, they'll kick us out of the house.
But you know why? Because we've never invited them.
We've never talked about it properly.
-It's useless. -Why?
Can you picture them eating a seafood pizza in the car?
-No. -Exactly.
Well, last slice. I'm ready. Go on.
Can I remind you that last time it didn't go well for you?
Okay, can I have a rematch?
-Sure. -Tell me when you're ready.
-Ready? -Yes.
-There it is. -Come on!
Hold the box, I don't want to mess up the car.
-I'll eat it slowly. I'll go all around. -I want a rematch as well.
-You can't. Last slice. Quiet. -Leave a piece.
You know this song?
-Yes. You don't? -No. And I don't like it.
So my problem is that my daughter is very young
and she listens to old music, right?
No, the problem is mine.
I have an old father who listens to music for kids.
The old father keeps up with young music, he's up to date.
Yes, fine.
I knew you knew it.
I pictured the end in many ways.
Like and unlike any other.
Sometimes I thought they would realize.
Other times that no one would.
I've seen the worst ends,
so I've tried to get the best.
I don't think I succeeded.
I don't know if I could have done anything.
A checklist is not enough for what I'd have liked to do.
Or better yet, for who I'd have liked to be.
Maybe the end would have been the same.
Something that comes silently.
You know how dogs die.
Alone.
Now we can leave.
You never expect some things to happen.
The bad...
and the good ones.
A dog got injured in the accident.
The vet said he would not run anymore, nor live long, since he was old.
So I decided to take care of him, because we shared the same fate.
He couldn't run anymore.
And I instead started running as fast as I could.
Piedino!
Mom, something incredible...
happened.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Happy birthday, honey.
I made it.
I don't know why you decided to come.
Maybe you're changing your mind.
Piedino started running and led me here.
I thought no one would be here...
But you're so many...
I mean, not that many.
But it's you, and you're here.
Mom.
I don't know if these are the heavenly signs you talk about.
I only know that, if Piedino took his time before running again,
maybe I should do the same, okay?
Without thinking about when I'll die and how it'll be. Okay?
Without skipping steps and being hated by 0.0001% of the world population.
You, Mom. And another two or three people.
So, 0.0001% of seven billion people...
-You know what annoys me? -I know.
No. I've given you so much advice.
-You've never listened to me. -Sorry.
You've always treated me like an idiot. Technically, you're a shitty friend.
Should I tell you the awful things you did to me?
Or the nice things you did while you acted like an asshole?
Look.
And if you scroll up...
No, thank you.
Okay.
By the way, I left him.
Francesco.
-His name. -Yes.
-Francesco. -Francesco.
-What convinced you to come? -Let's say that someone might have...
bought us. For 20 euros.
She's an accountant, after all.
Too bad she didn't buy everyone.
Stella, do you want my advice?
Are you or aren't you an Amazonian royal flycatcher?
-Yes. -Yes.
-So, go. Run. -Go.
-Come on. -Go, Stella!
-Okay. -Go!
Great.
I know. I was wrong, sorry.
Where is Matte?
Okay. Thank you.
-Did you like it? -Yes.
Me too.