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00:00:02,524 --> 00:00:03,742
Previously on Young Sheldon... Hello.
2
00:00:03,742 --> 00:00:05,222
I'm here for tutoring
with Sheldon.
3
00:00:05,222 --> 00:00:08,486
Oh, he's helping you?
Isn't that nice?
4
00:00:08,486 --> 00:00:10,097
I'm tutoring him.
5
00:00:10,097 --> 00:00:11,707
Come on.
I just gave you a hint.
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00:00:11,707 --> 00:00:13,796
We solve for the geodesics.
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00:00:13,796 --> 00:00:15,189
- Wrong.
- Ow!
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00:00:15,189 --> 00:00:16,364
[chuckles softly]
9
00:00:16,364 --> 00:00:17,669
What?
10
00:00:18,496 --> 00:00:21,847
Sorry, just a funny part
of the Bible.
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00:00:23,632 --> 00:00:24,894
MARY:
Oh, Shelly,
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00:00:24,894 --> 00:00:26,939
you got a package
from your little friend.
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00:00:26,939 --> 00:00:28,550
Dr. Sturgis sent me something?
He's so cute.
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00:00:28,550 --> 00:00:30,726
No, your tutor friend
from Germany.
15
00:00:30,726 --> 00:00:32,945
Mei-Tung was not my tutor,
she just assisted me
16
00:00:32,945 --> 00:00:34,860
in learning things
I didn't understand yet.
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00:00:34,860 --> 00:00:36,384
What'd you get?
18
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It's the latest issue
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00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:39,561
of the International
Physics Review.
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"Sheldon, check out page 58.
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"I never thought
I'd be published
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in such a prestigious journal."
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Wow, good for her.
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00:00:45,741 --> 00:00:47,395
Good for her?
What kind of monster sends mail
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00:00:47,395 --> 00:00:49,701
across multiple time zones just
to rub their success in my face?
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Indulging the ramblings
of a child.
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My respect for this
esteemed journal is plummeting.
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Oh, my.
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MARY:
What is it?
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00:00:58,275 --> 00:01:00,495
It's the paper I wrote
with Mei-Tung.
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I'm the coauthor
of an article
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00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:03,933
in a highly esteemed
physics journal.
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00:01:03,933 --> 00:01:05,935
Well, that's neat, Sheldon.
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00:01:05,935 --> 00:01:07,415
Neat is a robot that doesn't
look like a truck
35
00:01:07,415 --> 00:01:08,590
that turns into a truck.
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This treatise
revolutionizes
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the theory of manifolds.
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What word would you
like me to use?
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How about... transformative?
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00:01:16,119 --> 00:01:18,252
Sheldon, that's transformative.
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Thank you.
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- Hey.
- Hey, how was school?
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Good. I got an "A."
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That's amazing!
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She gets an "amazing"?
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All-all she did was color
inside the lines.
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She tell you?
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Yes, so great.
49
00:01:32,744 --> 00:01:35,138
Dad, I got published in
International Physics Review.
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Nice, buddy.
[pats back]
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Ooh, new boat catalog.
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♪ Nobody else
is stronger than I am ♪
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♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain
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♪ I bet I could be your hero
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♪ I am a mighty little man
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♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪
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MEEMAW:
An "A"?
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That's nice, sweetie.
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00:02:00,859 --> 00:02:02,513
It's Medford from the year
I was born.
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Aren't we going a little
overboard with this "A" thing?
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00:02:04,776 --> 00:02:07,344
Hey, some of us
never got an "A."
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Really?
Not even one?
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If only they graded lunch.
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I'll have you know,
I love my body.
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[chuckles]
MARY:Shelly,
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tell your meemaw
about your fancy article.
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Gladly. As an alternative
to the Calabi-Yau manifold,
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we've come up with a new shape
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to compactify the extra
dimensions in string theory.
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Well...
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hot dog.
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Hot dog?
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Maybe explain it
a little more simply.
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She means dumb it down.
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Hey. But, yeah.
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00:02:38,114 --> 00:02:40,638
You know how
a Moöbius strip generalized
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to the third dimension is
a Klein bottle?
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Dumber.
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A Moöbius strip is
a two-dimensional manifold
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that's embedded in... Dumber.
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Do you know what a square is?
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- Yes.
- Cube?
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Of course.
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Then you know what
a C-8 octachoron is.
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And for your information,
I've lost a little weight.
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You got to eat them
Cheerios,
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they're good for you.
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You can tell 'cause there
ain't no cartoon on the box.
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Now, Cocoa Puffs
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got that bird on 'em,
and he's cuckoo for 'em.
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Maybe she'd like some bananas
or some applesauce?
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She don't like
none of that.
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Any of that.
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Any of what?
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She doesn't like any of that.
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That's what I said.
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No, you said,
"She don't like none of that."
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We're sayin' the same thang.
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No, we're saying the same thing.
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Exactly.
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And we aren't.
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We ain't?
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I just think you may want to try
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speaking more properly
in front of your daughter.
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Ain't nothin' wrong
with the way I talk.
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Lotta people talk like me.
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True, but maybe CeeCee will have
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better opportunities in life
if she's well-spoken.
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She don't even talk yet.
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No, she doesn't.
[chuckles softly]
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00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:52,841
But she's listening
and she's learning,
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and we don't want her first
word to be "dang it."
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Better that than whatever
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the snooty version
of "dang it" is.
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It's "darn it."
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Dang it, I knew that.
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Remarkable work.
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Well done, lad.
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00:04:06,768 --> 00:04:08,944
Yes, first paper
published at 14.
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00:04:08,944 --> 00:04:11,381
Oh. You're officially
a wunderkind.
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Did you catch my sly in-joke
about a tesseract?
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Did I?
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I did.
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Did you?
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[quietly]:
I don't know.
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00:04:19,128 --> 00:04:21,478
It's refreshing to talk to
people who appreciate my work.
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00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:23,654
Appreciate it,
understand it,
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00:04:23,654 --> 00:04:26,614
- and are inspired by it.
- Ditto,
ditto and ditto.
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00:04:26,614 --> 00:04:30,226
And I'm sure your family
is very proud.
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Yes, but not just me.
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Childish maps, impregnating
a woman out of wedlock--
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they're proud of all their kids.
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The important thing is,
that kid belongs to us.
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00:04:40,584 --> 00:04:42,586
He is our cash cow.
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00:04:42,586 --> 00:04:43,805
Okay.
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00:04:43,805 --> 00:04:45,459
Explain this to me
so I sound like I know
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what I'm talking about
when I shake the donor tree.
138
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Well, young Mr. Cooper has
reimagined string theory.
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00:04:52,030 --> 00:04:54,598
And compactified dimensions
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00:04:54,598 --> 00:04:55,991
like nobody's business.
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00:04:55,991 --> 00:04:57,384
[both chuckle]
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00:04:57,384 --> 00:05:00,082
You don't understand this,
do you?
143
00:05:00,082 --> 00:05:01,736
No.
Not really.
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00:05:01,736 --> 00:05:04,173
I mean, we get
- what he's trying to do.
- Absolutely.
145
00:05:04,173 --> 00:05:06,871
No, we don't really
- understand it.
- Not a bit.
146
00:05:06,871 --> 00:05:10,005
So two of the top minds
at our school are
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00:05:10,005 --> 00:05:11,441
flummoxed by a 14-year-old.
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00:05:11,441 --> 00:05:13,574
Well, "flummoxed"
is a strong word.
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00:05:13,574 --> 00:05:15,663
- But accurate.
- Accurate.
150
00:05:15,663 --> 00:05:18,796
Mm-hmm. Okay, maybe I can
sell this by saying
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00:05:18,796 --> 00:05:20,668
that this is so advanced
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00:05:20,668 --> 00:05:23,192
that even other
brilliant scientists
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don't understand it.
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00:05:24,411 --> 00:05:25,673
Sexy.[growls]
155
00:05:25,673 --> 00:05:26,804
Don't do that.
156
00:05:27,979 --> 00:05:29,894
[phone ringing]
157
00:05:31,113 --> 00:05:32,157
Hello?
158
00:05:32,157 --> 00:05:34,116
This is she.
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00:05:34,116 --> 00:05:37,032
- Oh, really?
- Who is it?
160
00:05:37,598 --> 00:05:38,990
If it's a guy
about a boat, hang up.
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00:05:38,990 --> 00:05:41,558
One moment, please.
It's Princeton.
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00:05:41,558 --> 00:05:44,082
They want to talk about Sheldon
going to grad school.
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00:05:44,082 --> 00:05:45,388
Ooh, what are they offering?
164
00:05:45,388 --> 00:05:46,694
- I don't know.
- Full-ride?
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00:05:46,694 --> 00:05:48,609
- I said I don't know.
- Well, ask 'em.
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00:05:48,609 --> 00:05:49,871
I will if you'll shut up.
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00:05:49,871 --> 00:05:52,177
Okay, but I wouldn't
use that tone.
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00:05:52,177 --> 00:05:53,440
[knock at door]
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00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:56,312
I'll get it.
Remember, cash is king.
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Well, howdy.
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00:06:00,229 --> 00:06:01,796
Is this the Cooper residence?
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00:06:01,796 --> 00:06:02,840
It is.
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00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:04,886
Phil Lambert,
Stanford University.
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00:06:04,886 --> 00:06:06,931
I was just passing
through Medford
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00:06:06,931 --> 00:06:10,892
and I would love to talk to you
about your son's future.
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00:06:11,893 --> 00:06:13,547
Come on in, Phil.
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00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:16,724
Hey, Mare,
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00:06:16,724 --> 00:06:19,422
tell Princeton,
Stanford's passing through.
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00:06:25,820 --> 00:06:27,299
Well, thanks
for stopping by.
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00:06:27,299 --> 00:06:29,258
Well, I was kind of hoping
I could meet Sheldon.
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00:06:29,258 --> 00:06:30,433
All in good time.
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00:06:30,433 --> 00:06:32,000
We still got to whip
some of the lumps
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00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:33,697
out of that offer of yours.
We'll be in touch.
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00:06:33,697 --> 00:06:35,220
[stammers]
Okay.
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00:06:36,178 --> 00:06:37,788
Whip some of the lumps?
186
00:06:37,788 --> 00:06:40,530
Point is, Sheldon's
gobbledygook article
187
00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:41,879
got us a bidding war.
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00:06:41,879 --> 00:06:43,490
George, what do you know
about grad school?
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00:06:43,490 --> 00:06:46,144
Nothing, but I do know about
recruiting blue chip talent.
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00:06:46,144 --> 00:06:48,408
These schools want him,
and we got him.
191
00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:50,453
He's not a prize heifer
to auction off.
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00:06:50,453 --> 00:06:54,283
Mary, we got two average kids.
Let's cash in on the smart one.
193
00:06:57,329 --> 00:06:59,027
Do you think
I talk funny?
194
00:06:59,027 --> 00:07:00,376
What'd my mom say?
195
00:07:00,376 --> 00:07:03,248
Just that I should
speak more proper.
196
00:07:03,248 --> 00:07:05,599
You're fine, and she should
mind her own business.
197
00:07:05,599 --> 00:07:09,080
Thanks, 'cause she's all worried
CeeCee's gonna sound like me.
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00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:10,560
Oh.
199
00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:11,822
What?
200
00:07:12,780 --> 00:07:14,390
Nothing.
201
00:07:15,391 --> 00:07:16,958
You know,
202
00:07:16,958 --> 00:07:19,569
when I was a weather girl,
I took some speech classes,
203
00:07:19,569 --> 00:07:21,615
and they really seemed to help.
204
00:07:21,615 --> 00:07:23,268
Did you used to
sound like me?
205
00:07:24,052 --> 00:07:27,055
Oh, sweetie, no.
[laughs]
206
00:07:29,013 --> 00:07:31,276
Incoming, nine o'clock.
207
00:07:31,276 --> 00:07:33,757
Well, I hope you two are happy.
208
00:07:33,757 --> 00:07:35,019
Sheldon is being
recruited
209
00:07:35,019 --> 00:07:36,978
by Princeton, by Stanford,
210
00:07:36,978 --> 00:07:38,501
MIT, Caltech.
211
00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:40,982
We are losing him,
and you two have done nothing.
212
00:07:40,982 --> 00:07:42,505
What can we do?
213
00:07:42,505 --> 00:07:44,246
Those are some of the
best schools in the world.
214
00:07:44,246 --> 00:07:46,553
We have a wonderful
graduate program for physics.
215
00:07:46,553 --> 00:07:47,815
Actually...
216
00:07:47,815 --> 00:07:49,904
You're the chair
of the department.
217
00:07:49,904 --> 00:07:52,384
Yes, and the program
is far from wonderful.
218
00:07:52,384 --> 00:07:53,647
That said,
219
00:07:53,647 --> 00:07:56,911
our animal husbandry department
is first-rate.
220
00:07:56,911 --> 00:07:58,303
Fine. [sighs]
221
00:07:58,303 --> 00:08:01,045
We have other cards
to play. Uh...
222
00:08:01,045 --> 00:08:03,613
we're near his family,
and he loves you two--
223
00:08:03,613 --> 00:08:05,615
God knows why--
224
00:08:05,615 --> 00:08:07,704
and most importantly,
225
00:08:07,704 --> 00:08:09,314
he hates change.
226
00:08:09,314 --> 00:08:12,361
I changed deodorants once.
He made me change it back.
227
00:08:12,361 --> 00:08:14,972
Apparently, I smelled
too outdoorsy.
228
00:08:14,972 --> 00:08:16,670
All right, look, we-we've
been catering to Sheldon
229
00:08:16,670 --> 00:08:17,758
and his family
for years,
230
00:08:17,758 --> 00:08:19,499
so let's
take advantage
231
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:20,543
of what we know
232
00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:21,762
and use it
to keep him
233
00:08:21,762 --> 00:08:23,154
at East Texas Tech.
234
00:08:23,154 --> 00:08:26,331
His mother is very religious.
235
00:08:26,331 --> 00:08:28,072
Someone might mention
236
00:08:28,072 --> 00:08:30,771
Caltech was founded
237
00:08:30,771 --> 00:08:32,033
by a Satanist.
238
00:08:32,033 --> 00:08:34,426
Good, good.
Wait-wait, is that true?
239
00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:37,255
Actually, I don't care.
We're using it.
240
00:08:37,255 --> 00:08:39,649
- It is true.
- And again, I don't care,
241
00:08:39,649 --> 00:08:41,956
So, what else we got?
242
00:08:43,305 --> 00:08:45,699
Eh, with all the freeways
and traffic in California,
243
00:08:45,699 --> 00:08:46,700
he's gonna needa car.
244
00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:48,092
George, he's 14.
245
00:08:48,092 --> 00:08:49,224
Right.
246
00:08:49,224 --> 00:08:51,008
He's gonna need a car
and a driver.
247
00:08:51,008 --> 00:08:52,357
We can arrange that.
248
00:08:52,357 --> 00:08:53,445
So, what do you say?
249
00:08:53,445 --> 00:08:54,838
Stephen Hawking
and Sheldon Cooper
250
00:08:54,838 --> 00:08:56,318
together at Caltech?
251
00:08:56,318 --> 00:08:58,015
It's very promising.
252
00:08:58,015 --> 00:08:59,669
And of course,
some of our alumni
253
00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:01,497
include John Kennedy,
254
00:09:01,497 --> 00:09:02,716
Franklin Roosevelt,
255
00:09:02,716 --> 00:09:04,500
newly appointed
Supreme Court Justice
256
00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:05,849
Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
257
00:09:05,849 --> 00:09:08,156
That's an awful lot
of Democrats.
258
00:09:08,939 --> 00:09:11,594
Although Harvard did have
some impressive alumni.
259
00:09:11,594 --> 00:09:12,856
Bunch of presidents
260
00:09:12,856 --> 00:09:15,206
and that gal
on the court.
Mm-hmm.
261
00:09:15,206 --> 00:09:17,948
I thought U.T.
was burnt orange?
262
00:09:17,948 --> 00:09:20,211
Oh, no, that's the
University of Texas.
263
00:09:20,211 --> 00:09:23,084
We're the University of Toronto.
Go, True Blue.
264
00:09:23,084 --> 00:09:24,433
Toronto?
265
00:09:24,433 --> 00:09:26,870
Yes, sir, we're the Harvard
of the North, eh.
266
00:09:26,870 --> 00:09:28,393
Well, you should
probably get going.
267
00:09:28,393 --> 00:09:30,004
Got a long trip
ahead of you.
268
00:09:30,004 --> 00:09:31,875
I like everything
I'm hearing, but,
269
00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:33,660
at the end of the day,
this'll be Sheldon's choice.
270
00:09:33,660 --> 00:09:35,618
- Absolutely.
- Hang on a sec.
271
00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:37,620
I see an engineering department,
272
00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:39,535
a physics department,
computer lab.
273
00:09:39,535 --> 00:09:41,885
What I don't see is a church.
274
00:09:41,885 --> 00:09:44,235
Don't worry, we have a beautiful
275
00:09:44,235 --> 00:09:47,369
nondenominational chapel
built in 1956.
276
00:09:47,369 --> 00:09:48,762
Nondenominational?
277
00:09:48,762 --> 00:09:50,459
Everyone's welcome.
278
00:09:58,772 --> 00:09:59,990
STURGIS:
Hello, Sheldon.
279
00:09:59,990 --> 00:10:01,383
LINKLETTER:
There's my guy.
280
00:10:01,383 --> 00:10:02,732
Oh, hello.
281
00:10:02,732 --> 00:10:03,907
Is everything okay?
282
00:10:03,907 --> 00:10:05,039
Does something have to be wrong
283
00:10:05,039 --> 00:10:06,606
to hang out with a pal?
284
00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:08,085
Here at East Texas Tech,
285
00:10:08,085 --> 00:10:10,087
we're not just your faculty,
we're your friends.
286
00:10:10,087 --> 00:10:11,349
In the past, you made it
287
00:10:11,349 --> 00:10:12,437
very clear that
we're not friends.
288
00:10:12,437 --> 00:10:13,700
That's just me
289
00:10:13,700 --> 00:10:14,657
giving you the business
the way buddies do,
290
00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:17,051
you little scamp.
291
00:10:17,051 --> 00:10:19,053
Sorry, that was a little hard.
292
00:10:19,053 --> 00:10:21,142
We know this recruiting thing
can be stressful,
293
00:10:21,142 --> 00:10:24,188
and we just wanted to see
how you're holding up.
294
00:10:24,188 --> 00:10:25,755
It's actually not
stressful at all.
295
00:10:25,755 --> 00:10:28,279
My parents have been
handling most of it.
296
00:10:28,279 --> 00:10:29,672
That's great.
That's why it's good
297
00:10:29,672 --> 00:10:31,631
to have family
close by.
298
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:32,893
Friends and family
299
00:10:32,893 --> 00:10:35,678
just a hop, skip
and a jump away.
300
00:10:35,678 --> 00:10:37,114
I don't hop, skip or jump.
301
00:10:37,114 --> 00:10:38,420
See, that's that
sense of humor
302
00:10:38,420 --> 00:10:40,552
that we get but
strangers may not.
303
00:10:40,552 --> 00:10:42,076
Yes.
[forced laughter]
304
00:10:42,076 --> 00:10:43,686
Son, I knowyou have
305
00:10:43,686 --> 00:10:45,122
a lot of options
for grad school,
306
00:10:45,122 --> 00:10:47,037
and I'm sure you'll
make the right choice
307
00:10:47,037 --> 00:10:49,039
for yourself and your
sweet, aging grandma.
308
00:10:49,039 --> 00:10:51,520
Who will miss you
so much if you leave.
309
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:53,391
Moon Pie-- isn't that
what she calls you?
310
00:10:53,391 --> 00:10:55,132
- Yes.
- Sweet.
311
00:10:55,132 --> 00:10:56,830
So sweet.
312
00:10:59,746 --> 00:11:01,835
Hey, what
you doing?
313
00:11:01,835 --> 00:11:03,184
Reading.
314
00:11:03,967 --> 00:11:05,665
English Grammar and Compositio?
315
00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:06,970
It's Missy's.
316
00:11:06,970 --> 00:11:09,886
You know, you don't
have to do this.
317
00:11:09,886 --> 00:11:12,019
Well, I want to
do it for CeeCee.
318
00:11:12,889 --> 00:11:14,586
Well, maybe I can help.
319
00:11:14,586 --> 00:11:15,631
Yeah?
320
00:11:15,631 --> 00:11:16,719
Yeah, you don't need a book.
321
00:11:16,719 --> 00:11:18,416
Let's just
start simple.
322
00:11:19,374 --> 00:11:23,160
Um, instead of "ain't,"
try "isn't."
323
00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:25,162
That isn't gonna be a problem.
324
00:11:25,162 --> 00:11:29,166
There you go.
Now, let's work on "wasn't."
325
00:11:29,166 --> 00:11:30,254
Wadn't.
326
00:11:30,254 --> 00:11:31,821
Wasn't.
327
00:11:31,821 --> 00:11:33,040
Wadn't.
328
00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:34,824
See, I'm not hearing the "S."
329
00:11:34,824 --> 00:11:36,608
That's 'cause it wadn't there.
330
00:11:37,609 --> 00:11:39,350
GEORGE SR.:
So, we've narrowed it down to
331
00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:40,569
five schools.
332
00:11:40,569 --> 00:11:42,179
We got Caltech
and Stanford in California.
333
00:11:42,179 --> 00:11:43,833
- The left coast.
- Mom.
334
00:11:43,833 --> 00:11:44,921
It is.
335
00:11:44,921 --> 00:11:45,966
Can I continue?
336
00:11:45,966 --> 00:11:47,315
Also known as
337
00:11:47,315 --> 00:11:48,838
the land of
fruits and nuts. Continue.
338
00:11:48,838 --> 00:11:50,927
And on the East Coast,
we got MIT,
339
00:11:50,927 --> 00:11:52,450
Harvard and Princeton.
340
00:11:52,450 --> 00:11:53,538
Damn Yankees.
341
00:11:53,538 --> 00:11:55,932
We can't move
the schools, Connie.
342
00:11:56,933 --> 00:11:58,152
There's also East Texas Tech.
343
00:11:58,152 --> 00:11:59,719
Is that a school
that you're considering?
344
00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:01,764
I have friends there,
and it's close to all of you.
345
00:12:01,764 --> 00:12:03,723
Why would you want
- to be close to us?
- GEORGE SR.: Missy.
346
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:05,246
This is your decision,
347
00:12:05,246 --> 00:12:07,074
but best I understand,
these other schools are
348
00:12:07,074 --> 00:12:10,642
the major leagues,
and East Texas Tech is T-ball.
349
00:12:10,642 --> 00:12:12,557
Please don't make
sports analogies.
350
00:12:12,557 --> 00:12:14,559
Fine.
351
00:12:14,559 --> 00:12:17,127
These schools are like...
Superman
352
00:12:17,127 --> 00:12:19,390
and East Texas Tech is like...
353
00:12:19,390 --> 00:12:20,957
regular man?
354
00:12:20,957 --> 00:12:22,785
Better, I think.
355
00:12:22,785 --> 00:12:24,874
If you're worried
about being far away,
356
00:12:24,874 --> 00:12:26,702
they're all
offering to pay for
357
00:12:26,702 --> 00:12:27,921
travel expenses
so you can
358
00:12:27,921 --> 00:12:29,357
come home for
the holidays.
359
00:12:29,357 --> 00:12:31,794
But to be clear,
you don't have to.
360
00:12:31,794 --> 00:12:33,883
And we can also
come and visit you.
361
00:12:33,883 --> 00:12:36,059
Ooh, free trip. I like that.
362
00:12:36,059 --> 00:12:38,148
You were just complaining
about these places.
363
00:12:38,148 --> 00:12:40,847
I can complain
on a beach.
364
00:12:41,673 --> 00:12:43,588
This is a difficult decision.
365
00:12:43,588 --> 00:12:47,854
Which is why we're all
here to help you make it.
366
00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:51,988
FRESH PRINCE [on TV]:
♪ Now, this is a story
367
00:12:51,988 --> 00:12:53,511
♪ All about how my life got...
368
00:12:53,511 --> 00:12:54,991
Are we not done?
369
00:12:54,991 --> 00:12:57,298
It-it felt done.
370
00:13:08,657 --> 00:13:09,919
[knock on door]
371
00:13:09,919 --> 00:13:11,399
Come in.
372
00:13:12,313 --> 00:13:13,662
What are you doing?
373
00:13:13,662 --> 00:13:15,098
I can't sleep.
374
00:13:15,098 --> 00:13:17,144
This is the biggest
decision of my life.
375
00:13:17,144 --> 00:13:18,449
What's all this?
376
00:13:18,449 --> 00:13:19,624
I'm employing
377
00:13:19,624 --> 00:13:20,843
an algorithm to
assigns points to
378
00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:22,410
each school so I can
statistically decide
379
00:13:22,410 --> 00:13:23,759
which is the best.
380
00:13:23,759 --> 00:13:24,847
Hmm.
381
00:13:24,847 --> 00:13:27,154
How about "Eeny,
meeny, miny, moe"?
382
00:13:28,198 --> 00:13:29,330
I won't miss you.
383
00:13:29,330 --> 00:13:31,027
Same. What
school's winning?
384
00:13:31,027 --> 00:13:32,942
I've narrowed it down
to Caltech and MIT.
385
00:13:32,942 --> 00:13:34,726
Geographically
equidistant,
386
00:13:34,726 --> 00:13:36,598
so the travel time home
would be about the same.
387
00:13:36,598 --> 00:13:38,687
Caltech has Stephen Hawking,
which is exciting,
388
00:13:38,687 --> 00:13:40,036
but he hasn't won a Nobel Prize,
389
00:13:40,036 --> 00:13:42,734
unlike Henry Kendall at MIT,
who recently did.
390
00:13:42,734 --> 00:13:44,388
What's this little guy?
391
00:13:44,388 --> 00:13:46,216
Both schools' mascot
is a beaver.
392
00:13:46,216 --> 00:13:47,565
Not pertinent
to my needs,
393
00:13:47,565 --> 00:13:50,307
but amusing nonetheless.
Mm.
394
00:13:50,307 --> 00:13:51,918
Well, if you want my opinion,
395
00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:53,745
I say pick the one that's
near the beach and Hollywood.
396
00:13:53,745 --> 00:13:55,617
I hate those. Advantage MIT.
397
00:13:55,617 --> 00:13:57,401
Where's that?
Boston.
398
00:13:57,401 --> 00:13:59,273
So, what's your gut say?
399
00:13:59,273 --> 00:14:01,928
It doesn't say anything.
It's not a thinking organ.
400
00:14:01,928 --> 00:14:05,018
Fine, what's your...
Spidey-sense tell you?
401
00:14:05,018 --> 00:14:08,848
Spidey-sense warns Peter Parker
of imminent danger.
402
00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:10,675
It doesn't help him
pick schools.
403
00:14:11,502 --> 00:14:13,504
Well, the important thing is,
404
00:14:13,504 --> 00:14:15,419
no matter where you go,
405
00:14:15,419 --> 00:14:18,770
I'm gonna turn this room
into a dance studio.
406
00:14:19,815 --> 00:14:21,469
Mm-hmm.
407
00:14:26,256 --> 00:14:27,475
[knock at door]
408
00:14:28,302 --> 00:14:29,825
Howdy.
409
00:14:29,825 --> 00:14:31,261
Well, howdy yourself.
410
00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:33,176
Is this a bad time?
411
00:14:33,176 --> 00:14:34,569
No, but Sheldon's not here,
412
00:14:34,569 --> 00:14:36,179
if you were hoping
to talk to him.
413
00:14:36,179 --> 00:14:39,356
No, I was fixing to talk
to you and your hubby.
414
00:14:39,356 --> 00:14:41,010
Come on in.
415
00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:43,230
I brought you
some pecan pie
416
00:14:43,230 --> 00:14:45,449
and some beer
to wash it down.
417
00:14:45,449 --> 00:14:46,711
You didn't have
to do that.
418
00:14:46,711 --> 00:14:48,365
Oh, it's no problem.
419
00:14:48,365 --> 00:14:50,019
It's my
ding-dang pleasure.
420
00:14:50,019 --> 00:14:52,804
Okay. George?
421
00:14:53,631 --> 00:14:55,242
President Hagemeyer.
422
00:14:56,025 --> 00:14:57,548
This is a real honor,
having you visit.
423
00:14:57,548 --> 00:15:00,812
Oh, stop it with that
President nonsense.
424
00:15:00,812 --> 00:15:02,945
It's Linda... y'all.
425
00:15:02,945 --> 00:15:05,948
Okay, Linda,
so how can we help you?
426
00:15:05,948 --> 00:15:08,342
No, no, no,
how can I help you?
427
00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:09,647
Gee, I don't know.
428
00:15:09,647 --> 00:15:11,127
Rain gutters
could use cleaning.
429
00:15:11,127 --> 00:15:12,824
- George.
- Just a joke.
430
00:15:12,824 --> 00:15:14,826
Well, it doesn't have to be.
431
00:15:14,826 --> 00:15:16,872
You got a ladder
and some gloves, I'm your gal.
432
00:15:16,872 --> 00:15:17,917
[chuckles]
433
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,831
And I guess that's
why I'm here.
434
00:15:19,831 --> 00:15:22,225
You know, everybody's rolling
out the red carpet for Sheldon,
435
00:15:22,225 --> 00:15:23,661
as they should.
436
00:15:23,661 --> 00:15:26,316
But, I mean, who's
looking after your needs?
437
00:15:26,316 --> 00:15:28,666
Our needs?
I don't understand.
438
00:15:28,666 --> 00:15:31,365
Wouldn't you like
all your children
439
00:15:31,365 --> 00:15:32,496
to be college graduates?
440
00:15:32,496 --> 00:15:34,846
[laughs]
441
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:36,892
Wait, are
you serious?
442
00:15:36,892 --> 00:15:39,025
I'm in a position to offer
443
00:15:39,025 --> 00:15:42,463
a full scholarship
to Sheldon's twin sister,
444
00:15:42,463 --> 00:15:44,944
his older brother,
and I understand
445
00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,510
there's a grandchild in the mix.
446
00:15:46,510 --> 00:15:49,078
Just imagine how expensive
tuition will be
447
00:15:49,078 --> 00:15:50,862
18 years from now.
448
00:15:50,862 --> 00:15:53,996
Wow, that is
very generous.
449
00:15:53,996 --> 00:15:56,172
No, no, no, I don't--
I don't think so.
450
00:15:56,172 --> 00:15:57,521
No, I think
it's just
451
00:15:57,521 --> 00:16:01,917
giving you good,
hardworking folk
452
00:16:01,917 --> 00:16:03,527
what you deserve.
453
00:16:04,441 --> 00:16:05,790
I don't know what to say.
454
00:16:05,790 --> 00:16:08,402
Yeah, we... we'll have
to talk it over a little.
455
00:16:08,402 --> 00:16:11,709
At the end of the day,
it's still Sheldon's decision.
456
00:16:11,709 --> 00:16:14,060
Oh, of course, but-but
it's also a family decision,
457
00:16:14,060 --> 00:16:18,238
and that is what
East Texas Tech is all about.
458
00:16:18,238 --> 00:16:19,717
Family.
459
00:16:19,717 --> 00:16:23,460
Or, as I like to say, kin.
460
00:16:26,159 --> 00:16:29,771
[enunciating]:
Your mother has been helping me,
461
00:16:29,771 --> 00:16:32,600
and it has
not been easy.
462
00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:35,864
But I'm going to
463
00:16:35,864 --> 00:16:38,780
keep working on it for you.
464
00:16:39,781 --> 00:16:41,478
Okay, let's get you cleaned up.
465
00:16:42,262 --> 00:16:44,090
See? He's tryin'.
466
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:45,613
Try-ing.
467
00:16:46,614 --> 00:16:48,920
It's nice to see.
Who's ready for coffee?
468
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:52,141
I believe you mean,
"Whom's ready for coffee?"
469
00:16:53,273 --> 00:16:54,404
Whom's?
470
00:16:54,404 --> 00:16:56,972
Oh, let him have this one.
471
00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:01,411
STURGIS:Sheldon?
472
00:17:02,282 --> 00:17:03,413
Which is better?
473
00:17:03,413 --> 00:17:05,154
One or two?
474
00:17:05,154 --> 00:17:07,026
One, two?
475
00:17:07,635 --> 00:17:09,593
Hat I'll never wear one,
hat I'll never wear two.
476
00:17:09,593 --> 00:17:10,855
Are you okay?
477
00:17:10,855 --> 00:17:12,727
No, I didn't
sleep at all last night.
478
00:17:12,727 --> 00:17:14,076
For the life of me,
I can't decide between
479
00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:15,512
Caltech and MIT.
480
00:17:15,512 --> 00:17:17,079
No matter how
I analyze it,
481
00:17:17,079 --> 00:17:18,080
how I
break it down,
482
00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:19,777
they're basically equal.
483
00:17:19,777 --> 00:17:21,866
Great, then just pick
the one you want.
484
00:17:21,866 --> 00:17:23,955
What I want is to not have
to make this decision.
485
00:17:23,955 --> 00:17:27,481
Well, you could always
stay here.
486
00:17:28,308 --> 00:17:30,440
Maybe you're right.
Maybe deciding not to decide
487
00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:32,268
is the best decision
I can decide.
488
00:17:32,268 --> 00:17:33,269
Possibly.
489
00:17:33,269 --> 00:17:34,575
After all, an object at rest
490
00:17:34,575 --> 00:17:36,098
stays at rest.
That's just physics.
491
00:17:36,098 --> 00:17:38,753
The kind of physics
we understand.
492
00:17:39,580 --> 00:17:41,016
Very well, I'll stay here,
493
00:17:41,016 --> 00:17:42,322
I'll work with you two,
and everything will be...
494
00:17:42,322 --> 00:17:44,454
Stop.
495
00:17:44,454 --> 00:17:46,108
I can't do this.
496
00:17:46,108 --> 00:17:48,806
I'm glad you said that.
I'm also having qualms.
497
00:17:48,806 --> 00:17:50,634
- What are you talking about?
- You.
498
00:17:50,634 --> 00:17:52,897
We have to do
the right thing for him.
499
00:17:52,897 --> 00:17:54,160
And for science.
500
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:55,465
So, we're in agreement?
501
00:17:55,465 --> 00:17:56,988
Consequences be damned.
502
00:17:56,988 --> 00:17:59,295
Will someone please
tell me what's going on?
503
00:17:59,295 --> 00:18:02,298
Sheldon, you can't stay here.
504
00:18:02,298 --> 00:18:04,170
- Why?
- You've outgrown us.
505
00:18:04,170 --> 00:18:06,520
Me, literally.
506
00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:08,652
You deserve the best
education possible.
507
00:18:08,652 --> 00:18:11,090
You're going to do
great things, Sheldon.
508
00:18:12,526 --> 00:18:14,615
And we're proud to have been
509
00:18:14,615 --> 00:18:17,008
a small part of your journey.
510
00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:19,315
So, where should I go?
511
00:18:19,315 --> 00:18:20,838
Caltech.
MIT.
512
00:18:23,189 --> 00:18:25,452
[sportscaster speaking
indistinctly on TV]
513
00:18:25,452 --> 00:18:28,716
Mom, Dad, I've made a decision.
514
00:18:30,370 --> 00:18:31,893
All right.
515
00:18:32,676 --> 00:18:35,244
I'm going to MIT.
516
00:18:35,244 --> 00:18:37,028
ADULT SHELDON:
I know what you're thinking.
517
00:18:37,028 --> 00:18:38,813
Wait for it.
518
00:18:39,596 --> 00:18:41,076
I'm so excited to visit MIT.
519
00:18:41,076 --> 00:18:42,860
Me, too.
520
00:18:44,079 --> 00:18:45,950
Proud of you, son.
521
00:18:45,950 --> 00:18:47,082
Thank you, Dad.
522
00:18:52,392 --> 00:18:53,871
Caltech?
523
00:18:53,871 --> 00:18:55,482
Caltech.
524
00:18:56,439 --> 00:18:57,875
ADULT SHELDON:
Told you.
525
00:19:03,098 --> 00:19:04,795
I don't know
what to tell you, Linda.
526
00:19:04,795 --> 00:19:05,970
We begged him to stay.
527
00:19:05,970 --> 00:19:07,102
I got down
on my knees,
528
00:19:07,102 --> 00:19:09,235
and, well, John
was already there.
529
00:19:09,235 --> 00:19:12,542
We did everything
we could to keep him.
530
00:19:12,542 --> 00:19:16,372
I wore a cowboy hat and
offered a scholarship to a baby.
531
00:19:16,372 --> 00:19:18,635
Ooh. You win.
532
00:19:18,635 --> 00:19:19,984
Damn straight.
533
00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:21,203
I'd like to propose a toast.
534
00:19:21,203 --> 00:19:25,816
To our complete and utter
535
00:19:25,816 --> 00:19:27,166
lack of integrity.[chuckles]
536
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:28,471
Hear, hear.
Hear, hear.
537
00:19:32,954 --> 00:19:35,783
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
538
00:19:35,783 --> 00:19:39,178
WARNER BROS. TELEVISION
539
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,832
and TOYOTA.
540
00:19:41,832 --> 00:19:44,879
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org