1
00:00:08,676 --> 00:00:10,178
Garden's looking nice.

2
00:00:10,929 --> 00:00:14,724
Well, not to commit
the sin of pride, but I know.

3
00:00:14,807 --> 00:00:16,768
How did you come out of me?

4
00:00:16,851 --> 00:00:19,479
So good news,
John's coming home on Friday.

5
00:00:19,562 --> 00:00:22,440
- That's wonderful.
- It is.

6
00:00:22,524 --> 00:00:24,025
You must be thrilled.

7
00:00:24,108 --> 00:00:25,568
Oh, I am.

8
00:00:26,653 --> 00:00:30,281
- Little nervous?
- No. No. No.

9
00:00:30,365 --> 00:00:32,492
Be understandable if you were.

10
00:00:32,575 --> 00:00:35,828
The man has been in a mental institution.

11
00:00:35,912 --> 00:00:39,082
All I know is he sounded
like himself on the phone

12
00:00:39,165 --> 00:00:41,626
and the doctors say he's good to go.

13
00:00:41,709 --> 00:00:43,419
Well, that's great.

14
00:00:43,503 --> 00:00:45,046
It is. I'm excited.

15
00:00:46,589 --> 00:00:47,589
Well, good.

16
00:00:48,633 --> 00:00:50,260
Very excited.

17
00:00:52,679 --> 00:00:54,180
- Okay.
- I'm gonna get another beer.

18
00:00:54,264 --> 00:00:55,890
Because you're so excited?

19
00:00:55,974 --> 00:00:57,183
You know it.

20
00:00:58,434 --> 00:01:01,604
<i>♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪</i>

21
00:01:01,688 --> 00:01:04,440
<i>♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪</i>

22
00:01:04,524 --> 00:01:07,068
<i>♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪</i>

23
00:01:07,193 --> 00:01:09,988
<i>♪ I am a mighty little man ♪</i>

24
00:01:10,071 --> 00:01:13,950
<i>♪ I am a mighty little man ♪</i>

25
00:01:15,994 --> 00:01:18,955
We need to have a talk.
Georgie, get in here.

26
00:01:19,038 --> 00:01:20,999
Are we in trouble?

27
00:01:21,082 --> 00:01:22,709
- No one's in trouble.
- What's going on?

28
00:01:22,792 --> 00:01:25,878
- Have a seat.
- You're also getting talked to. Sit.

29
00:01:26,963 --> 00:01:29,716
- Ha.
- Okay.

30
00:01:29,799 --> 00:01:32,302
Dr. Sturgis will be joining us for dinner.

31
00:01:32,385 --> 00:01:34,387
- Hot darn.
- That guy's back?

32
00:01:34,470 --> 00:01:35,888
I thought he was in the nuthouse.

33
00:01:35,972 --> 00:01:37,432
We do not call it that.

34
00:01:37,515 --> 00:01:39,017
That's what Dad calls it.

35
00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:41,269
And that's why I made him sit.

36
00:01:41,352 --> 00:01:44,522
We need to make sure that
Dr. Sturgis feels comfortable.

37
00:01:44,606 --> 00:01:46,065
And how we supposed to do that?

38
00:01:46,149 --> 00:01:49,277
For starters, do not bring up
his time in the hospital.

39
00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:51,237
What if he brings it up?

40
00:01:51,321 --> 00:01:53,865
You let the grown-ups handle that.

41
00:01:53,948 --> 00:01:55,783
In this scenario,
am I one of the grownups?

42
00:01:55,867 --> 00:01:57,327
- No.
- Great.

43
00:01:57,410 --> 00:02:00,955
You also will not stare
at him during dinner.

44
00:02:01,039 --> 00:02:03,166
- Can I look at him at all?
- Yes.

45
00:02:03,249 --> 00:02:05,585
How long can I look
before it's considered staring?

46
00:02:05,668 --> 00:02:09,130
When I'm trying not to stare at girls,
my rule is two Mississippi.

47
00:02:09,213 --> 00:02:10,465
I taught him that.

48
00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:13,509
Just be on your best behavior,

49
00:02:13,593 --> 00:02:15,928
and if you're not sure
if you should say something,

50
00:02:16,012 --> 00:02:17,639
do not say it.

51
00:02:20,099 --> 00:02:22,018
- What?
- Hey, it works.

52
00:02:22,101 --> 00:02:24,937
When I hit three Mississippi's
she noticed.

53
00:02:25,021 --> 00:02:26,356
- See?
- Told you.

54
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:32,278
Meemaw and Dr. Sturgis are out front.

55
00:02:32,362 --> 00:02:34,280
They're walking up the path.

56
00:02:34,364 --> 00:02:35,615
They see me.

57
00:02:35,698 --> 00:02:37,617
I'm waving.

58
00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:38,910
They waved back.

59
00:02:39,994 --> 00:02:41,663
They're close to the door.

60
00:02:41,746 --> 00:02:44,165
Even closer.

61
00:02:44,248 --> 00:02:45,667
Almost there.

62
00:02:45,750 --> 00:02:46,876
Door...

63
00:02:46,959 --> 00:02:48,336
bell!

64
00:02:48,419 --> 00:02:50,380
Remember everything we talked about.

65
00:02:50,463 --> 00:02:51,798
Welcome.

66
00:02:51,881 --> 00:02:53,758
Look who I brought.

67
00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:55,301
Hello.

68
00:02:55,385 --> 00:02:57,261
Come in, come in.

69
00:02:57,345 --> 00:03:02,350
It's so good to see you.
I don't normally do this, but put her there.

70
00:03:02,433 --> 00:03:04,686
No mitten. I'm honored.

71
00:03:10,817 --> 00:03:15,571
- It's just so wonderful to see you all again.
- We've been looking forward to it.

72
00:03:15,655 --> 00:03:16,823
We sure have.

73
00:03:16,906 --> 00:03:19,283
One Mississippi,
two Mississippi.

74
00:03:22,704 --> 00:03:26,708
- Why are you counting?
- You know Shelly, he loves his numbers.

75
00:03:26,791 --> 00:03:29,001
Let's say grace.

76
00:03:29,752 --> 00:03:32,588
Bless us Lord for the food
we are about to receive,

77
00:03:32,672 --> 00:03:34,340
and bless the hands that prepared it.

78
00:03:34,424 --> 00:03:36,384
- Amen.
- Amen.

79
00:03:36,467 --> 00:03:37,427
Dig in.

80
00:03:37,428 --> 00:03:40,722
Oh, I am so excited to have
a home-cooked meal.

81
00:03:40,805 --> 00:03:44,350
The food in the hospital was bland-arino.

82
00:03:46,936 --> 00:03:50,314
Be sure to save room for dessert.
I made banana pudding.

83
00:03:50,398 --> 00:03:52,567
George, tell him how good
my banana pudding is.

84
00:03:53,568 --> 00:03:56,195
Good pudding. Lot of bananas.

85
00:03:56,279 --> 00:04:01,325
Well, now, pardon me if I'm wrong, but...
I would totally understand

86
00:04:01,409 --> 00:04:05,329
if any of you
felt uncomfortable about me being here

87
00:04:05,413 --> 00:04:06,789
after my time in the hospital.

88
00:04:06,873 --> 00:04:08,875
Oh, no, we're very comfortable.

89
00:04:08,958 --> 00:04:10,293
Very comfortable.

90
00:04:11,377 --> 00:04:14,255
Well, just in case, I want you all to know

91
00:04:14,338 --> 00:04:18,301
I'm perfectly happy to answer
any questions that you might have.

92
00:04:20,219 --> 00:04:21,637
You sure you wanna do that?

93
00:04:21,721 --> 00:04:23,097
Of course.

94
00:04:23,181 --> 00:04:26,768
The best way to destigmatize
something is to talk about it.

95
00:04:28,227 --> 00:04:29,227
May I?

96
00:04:31,189 --> 00:04:32,940
Um... Go ahead.

97
00:04:35,485 --> 00:04:38,237
Why wasn't I allowed to visit you?

98
00:04:38,321 --> 00:04:41,908
Some of the other patients there
were very unwell,

99
00:04:41,991 --> 00:04:45,536
and I didn't want you
to be disturbed by their behavior.

100
00:04:47,330 --> 00:04:49,373
- I got one.
- Here we go.

101
00:04:49,457 --> 00:04:51,542
Did they lock you up in a room?

102
00:04:51,626 --> 00:04:55,421
I wasn't able to leave the hospital
without being discharged,

103
00:04:55,505 --> 00:04:58,049
but I was free to walk the grounds.

104
00:05:00,051 --> 00:05:02,470
How did you know
when you were all better?

105
00:05:02,553 --> 00:05:05,681
Well, it's not like a cold,
where you have it and then you don't.

106
00:05:05,765 --> 00:05:11,020
But I've learned skills that help me
to manage my mental health.

107
00:05:12,021 --> 00:05:14,065
Well, that went over my head.

108
00:05:14,148 --> 00:05:15,106
I got another one.

109
00:05:15,107 --> 00:05:18,987
In <i>The Shining,</i> Jack Nicholson goes nuts
and chases people around with an ax...

110
00:05:19,070 --> 00:05:20,655
One question each.

111
00:05:20,738 --> 00:05:22,698
Dang it, should have started with that one.

112
00:05:24,659 --> 00:05:26,577
How about a little nightcap?

113
00:05:26,661 --> 00:05:29,831
Oh, I don't think so.
Gotta ride the old bike home.

114
00:05:30,581 --> 00:05:33,709
Oh? I thought you were staying the night.

115
00:05:33,793 --> 00:05:35,419
I wasn't planning on it.

116
00:05:36,754 --> 00:05:39,423
Oh. Okay.

117
00:05:39,507 --> 00:05:41,634
Now that we're talking about this...

118
00:05:42,635 --> 00:05:45,763
we've never really discussed
the status of our relationship.

119
00:05:46,931 --> 00:05:48,307
Don't you worry.

120
00:05:49,767 --> 00:05:54,814
As far as I'm concerned,
we just pick up right where we left off.

121
00:05:56,774 --> 00:05:57,942
That means a lot.

122
00:05:58,818 --> 00:06:02,613
But... I think it's for the best
if we don't.

123
00:06:04,365 --> 00:06:06,993
- What?
- I hope we can still be friends,

124
00:06:07,076 --> 00:06:12,331
but... I don't think we should be
in a romantic relationship anymore.

125
00:06:12,415 --> 00:06:14,292
Are you crazy?

126
00:06:14,375 --> 00:06:17,670
I mean, poor choice of words,
but are you crazy?

127
00:06:22,967 --> 00:06:28,180
Do you...? Do you mean you really
don't wanna see me anymore?

128
00:06:28,264 --> 00:06:29,807
Don't I get a say in that?

129
00:06:30,266 --> 00:06:32,852
Um... No.

130
00:06:32,935 --> 00:06:35,438
Really? I kind of think I do.

131
00:06:35,521 --> 00:06:38,482
Connie, if I'm single and have
another episode, it only hurts me.

132
00:06:38,566 --> 00:06:40,985
If we're together, that hurts you.

133
00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:42,695
And I can't do that again.

134
00:06:42,778 --> 00:06:46,657
I have been waiting
for you this whole time.

135
00:06:46,741 --> 00:06:49,076
It's just more proof that
you're a wonderful woman

136
00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:51,329
and you deserve someone
you can count on.

137
00:06:53,039 --> 00:06:55,708
How about Ira from the furniture store?

138
00:06:55,791 --> 00:06:56,751
He's a catch.

139
00:06:56,752 --> 00:06:59,838
Now you're gonna
play matchmaker for me?

140
00:06:59,921 --> 00:07:01,797
I suppose I am.

141
00:07:01,881 --> 00:07:04,550
You realize I could call him right now?

142
00:07:04,634 --> 00:07:05,843
I think you should.

143
00:07:05,927 --> 00:07:07,845
You'd better mean it, because I'll do it.

144
00:07:07,929 --> 00:07:09,597
No time like the present.

145
00:07:13,476 --> 00:07:14,476
I'm doing it.

146
00:07:17,313 --> 00:07:18,481
I'm dialing.

147
00:07:18,564 --> 00:07:19,564
Great.

148
00:07:24,362 --> 00:07:25,363
It's ringing.

149
00:07:25,446 --> 00:07:26,864
Tell him I said, hi.

150
00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:32,244
Rosenbloom's Fine Furniture,
Ira speaking.

151
00:07:32,328 --> 00:07:33,579
Hello, Ira.

152
00:07:34,789 --> 00:07:36,415
It's Connie Tucker.

153
00:07:36,916 --> 00:07:39,126
Connie, oh, my gosh.

154
00:07:39,210 --> 00:07:40,168
How are you?

155
00:07:40,169 --> 00:07:42,171
He wants to know how I am.

156
00:07:43,047 --> 00:07:44,047
Tell him.

157
00:07:44,966 --> 00:07:46,217
I'll call you back.

158
00:07:47,969 --> 00:07:49,136
Can you believe it?

159
00:07:49,220 --> 00:07:51,806
It sounds like he has
your best interests at heart.

160
00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:53,724
Men don't break up with me.

161
00:07:53,808 --> 00:07:55,184
I do the breaking up.

162
00:07:55,267 --> 00:07:59,563
I think it's nice that you can
still experience new things at your age.

163
00:07:59,647 --> 00:08:03,985
- Keep it up and you won't get to my age.
- So are you gonna go out with Ira?

164
00:08:04,068 --> 00:08:05,361
Well, I don't know why not.

165
00:08:06,362 --> 00:08:07,613
Is that really what you want?

166
00:08:07,697 --> 00:08:11,534
Well, I'm sure as hell not gonna sit home
by myself while I try and figure it out.

167
00:08:11,617 --> 00:08:14,453
Doesn't sound like you're being nice to Ira.

168
00:08:14,537 --> 00:08:16,789
She's not nice, been saying it for years.

169
00:08:22,503 --> 00:08:25,214
Mom,
will Dr. Sturgis be coming over again?

170
00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:27,174
Oh, um...

171
00:08:27,675 --> 00:08:28,968
I don't know.

172
00:08:29,051 --> 00:08:31,679
He should. We had so much fun
talking about the mental hospital

173
00:08:31,762 --> 00:08:33,305
we barely got to talk about science.

174
00:08:33,389 --> 00:08:35,641
Well, I don't know what his plans are.

175
00:08:35,725 --> 00:08:39,311
- Is Meemaw coming for dinner tonight?
- No, she is busy.

176
00:08:39,395 --> 00:08:41,772
With Dr. Sturgis? Maybe I can join them.

177
00:08:41,856 --> 00:08:44,859
All my fun facts make me
a welcome addition to any dinner date.

178
00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:49,405
She's not gonna be with Dr. Sturgis,
sweetie.

179
00:08:49,488 --> 00:08:52,241
Then I don't understand why
I can't invite him over.

180
00:08:55,745 --> 00:08:59,790
Your meemaw and Dr. Sturgis are...

181
00:08:59,874 --> 00:09:03,586
figuring out how their relationship
is gonna work now that he's back.

182
00:09:03,669 --> 00:09:06,922
Why does their relationship
need to be any different?

183
00:09:08,299 --> 00:09:09,592
It's complicated.

184
00:09:10,801 --> 00:09:13,220
So we can't have him over?

185
00:09:13,304 --> 00:09:16,223
Sorry, it's just not a good idea right now.

186
00:09:17,099 --> 00:09:18,559
This isn't fair.

187
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,979
I find the one person in Texas
who understands me

188
00:09:22,063 --> 00:09:24,148
and now I'm not allowed to see him?

189
00:09:24,940 --> 00:09:26,358
Hello.

190
00:09:26,442 --> 00:09:28,027
Come in.

191
00:09:28,110 --> 00:09:32,114
So, Connie is okay with my being here?

192
00:09:32,198 --> 00:09:35,159
Don't worry about it,
or, you know, mention it.

193
00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:37,328
Well, here's a pineapple.

194
00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:41,373
It's a symbol of hospitality
dating back to the 1700s.

195
00:09:41,457 --> 00:09:45,127
Thank you. How tropical.

196
00:09:46,128 --> 00:09:47,922
Dr. Sturgis, hello.

197
00:09:48,005 --> 00:09:49,005
Hi.

198
00:09:49,673 --> 00:09:53,010
Ooh. Did you know the pineapple
is a symbol of hospitality?

199
00:09:53,094 --> 00:09:54,720
As a matter of fact, I did.

200
00:09:54,804 --> 00:09:55,971
You're welcome.

201
00:09:58,307 --> 00:10:02,019
I gotta tell you,
this is an unexpected surprise.

202
00:10:02,103 --> 00:10:03,854
Here's to surprises.

203
00:10:06,524 --> 00:10:08,984
Because last I heard,
you and John were still going out.

204
00:10:09,068 --> 00:10:12,571
Well, now I'm not and I'm here with you,
so let's not talk about him.

205
00:10:12,947 --> 00:10:15,324
Ooh. Sounds like this breakup
is a little fresh.

206
00:10:15,407 --> 00:10:16,700
Yeah, it was pretty recent.

207
00:10:16,784 --> 00:10:20,871
- What, like a week? A month?
- Literally as I was calling you.

208
00:10:20,955 --> 00:10:23,833
Well, I'm glad that I was
the first person that came to mind.

209
00:10:25,042 --> 00:10:28,045
- Actually, you were his idea.
- Still glad.

210
00:10:31,674 --> 00:10:33,217
Really? This again?

211
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:34,927
Just sit.

212
00:10:35,010 --> 00:10:36,178
Where's Meemaw?

213
00:10:36,262 --> 00:10:37,763
She's not here tonight.

214
00:10:37,847 --> 00:10:38,847
Why?

215
00:10:38,889 --> 00:10:42,059
As I understand it, now that Dr. Sturgis
is back from the hospital,

216
00:10:42,143 --> 00:10:45,396
he and Meemaw are figuring out how
their relationship is going to work.

217
00:10:45,938 --> 00:10:46,938
What's that mean?

218
00:10:46,981 --> 00:10:49,859
- Sounds like she dumped him.
- Actually, he's the one...

219
00:10:49,942 --> 00:10:52,153
Sheldon, didn't you wanna talk
about science stuff?

220
00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:54,655
- Yes.
- Good, do that right now.

221
00:10:54,738 --> 00:10:57,700
Well, I realize being here after ending

222
00:10:57,783 --> 00:11:01,078
my romantic relationship
with Connie is unusual,

223
00:11:01,162 --> 00:11:03,289
so as before,

224
00:11:03,372 --> 00:11:08,294
I'm perfectly happy to answer
any questions that you might have.

225
00:11:08,377 --> 00:11:11,755
I have a question.
Can I eat in front of the TV?

226
00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:12,839
Sure.

227
00:11:13,883 --> 00:11:15,176
Let's get back to <i>The Shining.</i>

228
00:11:15,259 --> 00:11:18,345
When them elevator doors open, oh, man.

229
00:11:24,185 --> 00:11:25,811
All right, let me get this straight.

230
00:11:25,895 --> 00:11:28,022
Your boyfriend comes home
from the mental hospital,

231
00:11:28,105 --> 00:11:31,192
he dumps you, and he suggests
that you go out with me?

232
00:11:31,275 --> 00:11:34,153
- Yeah.
- Sounds like a spite date.

233
00:11:34,236 --> 00:11:36,864
Well, gosh, when you say it like that
it doesn't sound great.

234
00:11:36,947 --> 00:11:39,867
No, I'm fine with it, I just wanna
make sure I got everything right.

235
00:11:39,950 --> 00:11:43,662
Hospital, dumped, spite. You got it.

236
00:11:43,746 --> 00:11:46,749
All right. I hear
the creamed spinach is terrific.

237
00:11:46,832 --> 00:11:49,210
How do relationships work
for old people?

238
00:11:49,293 --> 00:11:51,921
When you were young,
you didn't think old women looked hot,

239
00:11:52,004 --> 00:11:53,964
but now that you're old, do you?

240
00:11:54,048 --> 00:11:57,009
Well, that's a very interesting question.

241
00:11:57,092 --> 00:11:59,678
- Can I speak to you in the kitchen?
- I wanna hear the answer.

242
00:11:59,762 --> 00:12:03,724
I've always found your grandmother
to be very hot stuff.

243
00:12:03,807 --> 00:12:04,934
All right, let's go.

244
00:12:05,017 --> 00:12:06,936
But you can see
her wrinkles, right?

245
00:12:07,019 --> 00:12:09,647
Why don't you take John
to a bar or something?

246
00:12:09,730 --> 00:12:10,688
Why?

247
00:12:10,689 --> 00:12:14,401
Because the children don't need to hear
how attractive he finds their grandmother.

248
00:12:14,485 --> 00:12:15,861
Why don't you take him out?

249
00:12:15,945 --> 00:12:19,615
Fine. You make sure the kids
take baths and get to bed.

250
00:12:19,698 --> 00:12:22,201
Oh, and Sheldon needs
his fingernails trimmed.

251
00:12:22,284 --> 00:12:24,745
Hey, John, what do you say
you and I go grab a beer?

252
00:12:24,828 --> 00:12:26,956
But we haven't cut open the pineapple yet.

253
00:12:27,039 --> 00:12:30,000
You boys go ahead,
we'll eat the pineapple another time.

254
00:12:30,084 --> 00:12:32,378
But we haven't had a chance
to talk about science.

255
00:12:32,461 --> 00:12:34,630
- Oh, can Sheldon come?
- Can I?

256
00:12:34,713 --> 00:12:35,965
No.

257
00:12:36,048 --> 00:12:37,049
Aww.

258
00:12:37,132 --> 00:12:39,885
So enough about me.
What's been going on in your life?

259
00:12:39,969 --> 00:12:44,431
Oh, boy. Well, after you and I broke up,
I took the opportunity to work on myself.

260
00:12:44,515 --> 00:12:45,975
Started playing tennis again.

261
00:12:46,058 --> 00:12:47,935
I bought a telescope, which is pretty cool,

262
00:12:48,018 --> 00:12:50,396
because I got to see the moon
all big and things.

263
00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:54,400
And I tried Vietnamese food
for the first time, which did not go well.

264
00:12:54,483 --> 00:12:56,610
Oh, very spicy.
You wouldn't believe the heartburn.

265
00:12:56,694 --> 00:12:58,862
Not enough Tums in the world.

266
00:13:03,617 --> 00:13:05,327
This is wonderful.

267
00:13:05,411 --> 00:13:09,206
Did you know the term "dive bar" originated

268
00:13:09,290 --> 00:13:13,252
because many establishments
were below street-level

269
00:13:13,335 --> 00:13:17,381
and patrons had to essentially
dive down to enter them?

270
00:13:18,382 --> 00:13:21,510
- Didn't know that.
- Well, now you do.

271
00:13:21,593 --> 00:13:23,470
Hey, George. Who's your friend?

272
00:13:23,554 --> 00:13:25,472
Hey, Nate. This is John Sturgis.

273
00:13:26,390 --> 00:13:27,474
He's a scientist.

274
00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:31,603
- Pleased to make your acquaintance, Nate.
- What can I get you?

275
00:13:32,187 --> 00:13:36,358
- Um... Do you have sarsaparilla?
- Two beers. We'll take two beers.

276
00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:40,487
I must admit, after the breakup,
I was worried,

277
00:13:40,571 --> 00:13:42,489
but now that Dr. Sturgis
and Dad are friends,

278
00:13:42,573 --> 00:13:44,033
we'll be seeing even more of him.

279
00:13:44,116 --> 00:13:45,701
How do we see less of him?

280
00:13:45,784 --> 00:13:47,870
That is not nice.

281
00:13:47,953 --> 00:13:51,415
Sorry, but I'm on Meemaw's side.
She got me a two-piece bathing suit.

282
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:54,209
I didn't realize we were expected
to take sides.

283
00:13:54,293 --> 00:13:55,878
No one needs to take sides.

284
00:13:55,961 --> 00:13:57,713
When Heather M's parents got divorced,

285
00:13:57,796 --> 00:14:00,591
she said it was like picking sides,
but you get twice the presents.

286
00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:01,967
This isn't a divorce.

287
00:14:02,051 --> 00:14:04,636
And I'm sure Meemaw
and Dr. Sturgis will still be friends.

288
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:08,557
Heather M's parents aren't friends,
but now she's got Barbie's Dreamhouse

289
00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:10,351
and the pink Corvette.

290
00:14:11,810 --> 00:14:12,978
You heard me.

291
00:14:15,439 --> 00:14:16,940
Oh, thank you.

292
00:14:17,024 --> 00:14:19,401
That looks amazing. I love ice cream.

293
00:14:19,485 --> 00:14:23,280
Did you know that they used to use
the anal glands of beavers

294
00:14:23,364 --> 00:14:24,782
to make it taste like vanilla?

295
00:14:24,865 --> 00:14:27,576
No. Where'd you hear that?

296
00:14:27,659 --> 00:14:32,039
I understand it's difficult
to milk the little sacs.

297
00:14:33,415 --> 00:14:35,959
It's just something I picked up
along the way.

298
00:14:37,044 --> 00:14:38,712
You okay?

299
00:14:38,796 --> 00:14:41,840
Yeah. Let's eat pie.

300
00:14:41,924 --> 00:14:43,634
And maybe not the ice cream.

301
00:14:46,512 --> 00:14:50,349
Can you believe
Connie was my first girlfriend?

302
00:14:50,432 --> 00:14:51,725
Really?

303
00:14:51,809 --> 00:14:54,103
And probably my last.

304
00:14:54,186 --> 00:14:56,397
Come on, don't talk like that.

305
00:14:56,480 --> 00:14:57,689
No, it's true.

306
00:14:57,773 --> 00:15:02,194
She may not realize it,
but this is all for the best.

307
00:15:02,277 --> 00:15:05,030
I'm damaged goods.

308
00:15:05,114 --> 00:15:06,865
No, you're not.

309
00:15:06,949 --> 00:15:12,121
It had just been so long since
I'd had an episode, I thought I was okay.

310
00:15:12,204 --> 00:15:18,210
But, ha, clearly I'm not,
and who knows if it'll happen again?

311
00:15:18,293 --> 00:15:23,173
And I just can't take the risk
of putting Connie through that.

312
00:15:23,257 --> 00:15:25,801
Hey, she's got problems too.

313
00:15:25,884 --> 00:15:28,595
I've seen her take a wine cooler
out of the trash and finish it.

314
00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:31,098
I'm not joking.

315
00:15:31,181 --> 00:15:34,393
Well, thank you for listening.

316
00:15:34,476 --> 00:15:35,853
My pleasure.

317
00:15:35,936 --> 00:15:39,440
And if you wanna talk about
your relationship with Mary,

318
00:15:39,523 --> 00:15:40,858
I'm all ears.

319
00:15:41,859 --> 00:15:45,362
Intimacy issues,
communication difficulties,

320
00:15:45,446 --> 00:15:47,114
problems in the bedroom.

321
00:15:47,197 --> 00:15:49,408
- Hey, pool table's open.
- Ha.

322
00:15:49,491 --> 00:15:50,617
Wonderful.

323
00:15:52,744 --> 00:15:56,373
But if you did get a divorce,
how many American Girl dolls could I get?

324
00:15:56,457 --> 00:15:59,084
Your father and I aren't getting a divorce.

325
00:15:59,168 --> 00:16:00,878
But more than one, right?

326
00:16:00,961 --> 00:16:03,422
Are there any questions
that aren't about divorce?

327
00:16:04,590 --> 00:16:05,590
Nope. Sheldon?

328
00:16:07,092 --> 00:16:10,846
Is it difficult to see your mother go out
with men who aren't your father?

329
00:16:11,805 --> 00:16:14,057
Wow, that's a big one.

330
00:16:15,476 --> 00:16:16,476
Um...

331
00:16:17,311 --> 00:16:20,355
I suppose it took some getting used to,

332
00:16:20,439 --> 00:16:22,649
but she's a grown-up,

333
00:16:22,733 --> 00:16:26,862
and even though Pop-Pop passed away,
she deserves to be happy.

334
00:16:28,113 --> 00:16:31,783
Just so you know, I'd be happy
with one American Girl doll.

335
00:16:31,867 --> 00:16:33,327
And we're done.

336
00:16:34,077 --> 00:16:35,746
Thank you so much, Ira.

337
00:16:35,829 --> 00:16:37,206
I really needed this.

338
00:16:37,289 --> 00:16:38,665
You're welcome.

339
00:16:38,749 --> 00:16:42,294
We should do it again.
What's your Friday night look like?

340
00:16:42,377 --> 00:16:44,922
Friday's no good,
we're doing inventory at the store.

341
00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:46,256
Oh, okay.

342
00:16:46,340 --> 00:16:48,300
Well, how about the weekend?

343
00:16:48,383 --> 00:16:50,219
No, no, no, that's not good for me either.

344
00:16:51,970 --> 00:16:54,223
Are you blowing me off?

345
00:16:54,306 --> 00:16:56,099
Is it that obvious?

346
00:16:56,183 --> 00:16:57,935
Well, I don't understand why.

347
00:16:58,018 --> 00:17:00,270
I mean, I thought we had a nice time.

348
00:17:00,354 --> 00:17:02,814
We did, but you're still hung up on John,

349
00:17:02,898 --> 00:17:05,651
and I don't wanna have
my heart broken again,

350
00:17:05,734 --> 00:17:07,819
so I'm gonna respectfully pass.

351
00:17:10,322 --> 00:17:11,615
Unbelievable.

352
00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:12,950
I know.

353
00:17:13,033 --> 00:17:16,703
It turns out I do have a shred of dignity.
I'm as surprised as you are.

354
00:17:18,539 --> 00:17:20,290
I'm not having a good week.

355
00:17:21,166 --> 00:17:23,126
Have you played much pool?

356
00:17:23,210 --> 00:17:25,671
Oh, in my undergraduate days, all the time.

357
00:17:25,754 --> 00:17:28,465
It's just physics and geometry.

358
00:17:28,549 --> 00:17:30,008
Is that so?

359
00:17:30,092 --> 00:17:32,803
I calculate the angles in my head,

360
00:17:32,886 --> 00:17:36,390
sometimes in radians,
sometimes in degrees,

361
00:17:36,473 --> 00:17:39,268
depending on my level of whimsy.

362
00:17:39,351 --> 00:17:41,019
I'm a radians man myself.

363
00:17:42,229 --> 00:17:44,147
- That's a joke?
- Supposed to be.

364
00:17:45,524 --> 00:17:47,568
Oh, life is funny.

365
00:17:47,651 --> 00:17:50,862
A week ago, I was in mental institution,

366
00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:55,158
and now, I'm laughing it up in a dive bar.

367
00:17:55,242 --> 00:17:58,745
Not just any dive bar,
one where everyone knows me.

368
00:17:58,829 --> 00:18:02,249
And they are lucky that they do.

369
00:18:05,460 --> 00:18:08,171
- Excuse me, everyone.
- Oh, boy.

370
00:18:08,255 --> 00:18:12,926
I would like to propose a toast
to George Cooper.

371
00:18:13,010 --> 00:18:14,761
I don't mind telling you

372
00:18:14,845 --> 00:18:17,973
I'm going through a bit of a rough patch,

373
00:18:18,056 --> 00:18:21,059
and this man went out of his way

374
00:18:21,143 --> 00:18:24,730
to take me here and listen to my woes.

375
00:18:24,813 --> 00:18:28,108
And George and I don't even
know each other that well.

376
00:18:28,191 --> 00:18:30,152
You heard it. Y'all heard it.

377
00:18:30,235 --> 00:18:32,696
But I just broke up with a woman,

378
00:18:32,779 --> 00:18:36,325
a beautiful, passionate woman.

379
00:18:36,408 --> 00:18:38,410
Adventurous.

380
00:18:38,493 --> 00:18:39,493
Sensual.

381
00:18:40,662 --> 00:18:44,750
Apparently, you're never
too old for heartache.

382
00:18:44,833 --> 00:18:48,629
But tonight, I found solace

383
00:18:48,712 --> 00:18:51,590
in the bosom of male friendship.

384
00:18:55,469 --> 00:18:56,803
To George Cooper.

385
00:18:58,805 --> 00:19:01,391
Drinks are on me.

386
00:19:01,475 --> 00:19:04,811
To George Cooper.

387
00:19:24,539 --> 00:19:26,124
What happened?

388
00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:29,461
Oh, I had a few beers. He had one.

389
00:19:30,879 --> 00:19:31,963
Seriously?

390
00:19:32,047 --> 00:19:34,925
We can't get a dog,
and this guy's still here?