1 00:00:00,542 --> 00:00:03,462 Previously on Young Sheldon... Which bowtie says "mature enough 2 00:00:03,462 --> 00:00:05,255 "to be in college, but whimsical enough 3 00:00:05,255 --> 00:00:06,715 "to discuss which came first, 4 00:00:06,715 --> 00:00:08,550 the Higgs field or the photon"? 5 00:00:08,550 --> 00:00:10,636 They both say "weird kid who eats alone." 6 00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:13,305 Hello, Dr. Sturgis. This is Mary Cooper. 7 00:00:13,305 --> 00:00:16,808 Did you know there's a, uh, supercollider being built 8 00:00:16,808 --> 00:00:19,394 in Waxahachie, Texas? No. 9 00:00:19,394 --> 00:00:21,521 I've taken a job there. 10 00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:24,524 Hold on. You're not gonna be around 11 00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:25,984 when Sheldon starts college? 12 00:00:25,984 --> 00:00:28,153 That's a great question. 13 00:00:28,153 --> 00:00:29,571 No. 14 00:00:31,657 --> 00:00:33,325 JEFF: Since everyone 15 00:00:33,325 --> 00:00:35,202 is going back to school tomorrow, let's finish up 16 00:00:35,202 --> 00:00:38,413 with a back-to-school prayer. What? 17 00:00:38,413 --> 00:00:40,249 Does this prayer just apply to middle school, 18 00:00:40,249 --> 00:00:42,751 or is it appropriate for the college-bound? 19 00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:44,253 It's for everyone. 20 00:00:44,253 --> 00:00:46,588 But thank you once again for reminding us 21 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:48,131 you're starting college. 22 00:00:48,131 --> 00:00:50,342 Oh, I don't mind. You've got a lot on your plate. 23 00:00:50,342 --> 00:00:52,261 Just pray. 24 00:00:52,261 --> 00:00:55,347 ALL: Dear Heavenly Father, as we return to school, 25 00:00:55,347 --> 00:00:56,556 we look to your eternal... 26 00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:57,599 Billy, it's not the pledge. 27 00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:03,188 It is clear that we cannot expect the cooperation... (phone ringing) 28 00:01:03,188 --> 00:01:07,359 Normally I don't like facial hair, but Spock makes it work. 29 00:01:07,359 --> 00:01:08,944 Hello? Sheldon, 30 00:01:08,944 --> 00:01:10,696 it's Dr. Linkletter. 31 00:01:10,696 --> 00:01:13,031 I'm watching Star Trek: The Original Series. 32 00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:15,701 I'm sorry, I'm not up on my cartoons. 33 00:01:15,701 --> 00:01:17,536 It's not a cartoon. It's a live-action 34 00:01:17,536 --> 00:01:19,121 science fiction show. 35 00:01:19,121 --> 00:01:20,706 Although there is one called Star Trek: 36 00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:22,165 The Animated Series. 37 00:01:22,165 --> 00:01:23,750 I believe you. 38 00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:25,919 I was wondering if I can speak with your mommy. 39 00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,379 Sure. Hold on. 40 00:01:27,379 --> 00:01:29,715 Mom, Dr. Linkletter's on the phone. 41 00:01:29,715 --> 00:01:30,882 While we wait, here's a fun fact. 42 00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:32,718 In the animated series, 43 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:34,553 Kukulkan was played by James Doohan. 44 00:01:34,553 --> 00:01:37,014 Hello? James Doohan played Scotty 45 00:01:37,014 --> 00:01:38,307 on Star Trek: The Original Series. 46 00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:40,142 Sheldon, I've got it. 47 00:01:40,142 --> 00:01:42,644 He tried several accents before settling on Scottish. 48 00:01:42,644 --> 00:01:45,439 MARY: Sheldon, hang up. SHELDON: Okay. 49 00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:47,899 He felt the Scots were excellent engineers. Bye. 50 00:01:47,899 --> 00:01:49,818 Dr. Linkletter, 51 00:01:49,818 --> 00:01:51,570 what can I do for you? 52 00:01:51,570 --> 00:01:53,572 Hello, Mrs. Cooper. I just wanted to let you know, 53 00:01:53,572 --> 00:01:55,991 with Dr. Sturgis away, I'll be available 54 00:01:55,991 --> 00:01:57,909 should Sheldon need anything. 55 00:01:57,909 --> 00:02:02,289 Oh, that is very comforting to know. Thank you so much. 56 00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:04,750 His well-being is important to me, 57 00:02:04,750 --> 00:02:07,586 as was made abundantly clear by my boss. 58 00:02:07,586 --> 00:02:11,256 Okay, well, we are truly grateful. 59 00:02:11,256 --> 00:02:13,842 Now, I'm not terribly experienced around children. 60 00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:15,927 If he needs to use the restroom, I don't have to 61 00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:18,263 go in with him, do I? 62 00:02:18,263 --> 00:02:20,932 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 63 00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:23,935 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 64 00:02:23,935 --> 00:02:27,105 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 65 00:02:27,105 --> 00:02:29,066 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 66 00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:33,570 ♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪ 67 00:02:37,699 --> 00:02:39,618 Bless us, Lord, for the food we are about to receive, 68 00:02:39,618 --> 00:02:41,328 and bless the hands that prepared it. 69 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:42,996 And with school starting tomorrow, 70 00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,664 please watch over our children. 71 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:46,291 Pastor Jeff already covered this. 72 00:02:46,291 --> 00:02:48,377 He did? Yeah, we're good. Amen. 73 00:02:48,377 --> 00:02:50,712 ALL: Amen. 74 00:02:50,712 --> 00:02:52,214 Can I take your truck tomorrow? 75 00:02:52,214 --> 00:02:54,299 Well, I think you're riding with me. 76 00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:56,676 Sorry, I'm taking Missy to school, 77 00:02:56,676 --> 00:02:58,804 and Meemaw's taking Sheldon. 78 00:02:58,804 --> 00:03:01,348 Well, can I at least drive? Sure. 79 00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:03,141 While you hide in the back under a tarp? 80 00:03:03,141 --> 00:03:06,019 Stop praying for him and focus on the other two. 81 00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:09,147 Sheldon, good news. 82 00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:10,899 Dr. Linkletter was calling to say 83 00:03:10,899 --> 00:03:13,693 that while you're at school, if you need anything, 84 00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:15,195 you can go to him. 85 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,988 Starting college and you need a babysitter. 86 00:03:16,988 --> 00:03:18,073 That's funny. 87 00:03:18,073 --> 00:03:20,075 I don't need a babysitter. 88 00:03:20,075 --> 00:03:24,246 Dr. Linkletter is just around in case there's a problem. 89 00:03:24,246 --> 00:03:26,248 Like if he needs a new diaper? Ha! 90 00:03:26,248 --> 00:03:29,000 Enough. Can we please have a nice dinner? 91 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:32,337 We could. But you're the one who wants to eat as a family. 92 00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:35,006 Don't pray for any of 'em. 93 00:03:36,508 --> 00:03:37,634 (knock on door) 94 00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:40,053 Dr. Linkletter. Sheldon. 95 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:42,431 How wonderfully early it is to see you. 96 00:03:42,431 --> 00:03:44,766 If you've come by for a snack, I picked you up 97 00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:46,351 some crackers shaped like fish. 98 00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:48,228 I just wanted to let you know 99 00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:49,896 that I don't need you to babysit me. 100 00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:51,690 I'm perfectly self-reliant. 101 00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:54,109 Excellent. I'm not very comfortable around children, 102 00:03:54,109 --> 00:03:55,861 even with your level of maturity. 103 00:03:55,861 --> 00:03:57,696 How old are you? Six? Seven? 104 00:03:57,696 --> 00:03:58,655 Eleven. 105 00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:00,240 I see. 106 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:01,950 Then it's good I kept the receipt for this 107 00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:04,870 bottle of bubbles shaped like a bear. 108 00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:06,580 I should get going. 109 00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:08,957 My philosophy class starts in a few minutes. 110 00:04:08,957 --> 00:04:12,169 Ah, yes, the great thinkers. Socrates, Plato. 111 00:04:12,169 --> 00:04:16,381 Speaking of which, I got you some Play-Doh. 112 00:04:22,012 --> 00:04:23,388 I figure you don't want me to walk you in? 113 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:25,015 I've trained you well. 114 00:04:25,015 --> 00:04:27,684 Do you have everything you need? Lunch money? 115 00:04:27,684 --> 00:04:29,311 Yep. Locker combination? 116 00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:31,146 Right here. 117 00:04:31,146 --> 00:04:33,982 Why is it there? Writing on my hand is so fifth grade. 118 00:04:33,982 --> 00:04:35,650 Of course. 119 00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:37,819 Okay, I'm gonna go in. 120 00:04:37,819 --> 00:04:40,489 I assume you don't want a hug? 121 00:04:40,489 --> 00:04:42,157 Make it quick. 122 00:04:43,909 --> 00:04:45,702 That's enough. Okay. 123 00:04:47,162 --> 00:04:49,790 Wish me luck. Good luck. 124 00:04:54,085 --> 00:04:56,129 ♪ ♪ 125 00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:06,181 Hey. 126 00:05:06,181 --> 00:05:07,641 Hey, Brenda. 127 00:05:07,641 --> 00:05:09,100 She didn't want you to walk her in? 128 00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:10,894 No. How about Billy? 129 00:05:10,894 --> 00:05:12,020 Oh, I walked him in. 130 00:05:12,020 --> 00:05:13,438 Found his homeroom. 131 00:05:13,438 --> 00:05:14,898 Explained that "homeroom" is different 132 00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:16,691 than his room at home. 133 00:05:16,691 --> 00:05:18,193 Still not sure he gets it. 134 00:05:18,193 --> 00:05:20,403 Tough day. Yeah. 135 00:05:20,403 --> 00:05:22,364 You want to get some coffee? 136 00:05:22,364 --> 00:05:25,659 I was thinking vodka, but coffee will do. 137 00:05:28,537 --> 00:05:32,415 ADULT SHELDON: I've always considered myself a collector of knowledge. 138 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:35,210 My mind is like the warehouse at the end of 139 00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:37,587 Raiders of the Lost Ark. 140 00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:40,799 But instead of artifacts, it's just facts. (chuckles) 141 00:05:40,799 --> 00:05:43,260 And now that I was a full-time college student, 142 00:05:43,260 --> 00:05:46,638 my collection was about to grow exponentially. 143 00:05:46,638 --> 00:05:48,890 ERICSON: Welcome to the world of philosophy. 144 00:05:48,890 --> 00:05:52,227 Most college courses are about teaching you things 145 00:05:52,227 --> 00:05:54,145 that you don't know. Here, 146 00:05:54,145 --> 00:05:57,607 I am going to teach you that you don't even know 147 00:05:57,607 --> 00:05:59,818 what you think you know. 148 00:05:59,818 --> 00:06:01,820 Oh, boy. 149 00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:09,578 The Chinese philosopher Chuang Tzu believed 150 00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:12,455 it was possible he didn't really know anything 151 00:06:12,455 --> 00:06:14,833 because he might just be a butterfly 152 00:06:14,833 --> 00:06:16,918 dreaming that he was a philosopher. 153 00:06:16,918 --> 00:06:18,253 Yes. 154 00:06:18,253 --> 00:06:19,588 He wasn't a butterfly. 155 00:06:19,588 --> 00:06:21,339 Well, how do you know? 156 00:06:21,339 --> 00:06:23,425 The butterfly brain doesn't contain enough neurons 157 00:06:23,425 --> 00:06:26,094 to generate a complex dream. Plus, you referred to him 158 00:06:26,094 --> 00:06:27,512 as Chinese philosopher Chuang Tzu, 159 00:06:27,512 --> 00:06:29,598 and not Chinese butterfly Chuang Tzu. 160 00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:32,601 You must be Sheldon Cooper. Yes, ma'am. 161 00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:35,270 Very well, Mr. Cooper, how do you know 162 00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:38,023 you're not just dreaming butterflies can't dream? 163 00:06:38,023 --> 00:06:39,441 Because I'm awake. 164 00:06:39,441 --> 00:06:41,192 Or are you dreaming you're awake? 165 00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:43,945 You can see I'm awake and you can hear me talking. 166 00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:45,864 Yeah... I don't know. 167 00:06:45,864 --> 00:06:48,950 I saw some pretty trippy stuff at a Grateful Dead concert. 168 00:06:50,493 --> 00:06:52,454 The drummer turned into a tap-dancing walrus 169 00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:53,997 and floated away. 170 00:06:53,997 --> 00:06:57,334 So we can't really trust our senses, can we? 171 00:06:57,334 --> 00:06:58,793 We can validate them by 172 00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:00,128 comparing them with other observers. 173 00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:02,464 Mm, but that would mean 174 00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:04,341 we have to hear what they say, 175 00:07:04,341 --> 00:07:08,511 which requires... trusting our senses. 176 00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:11,473 Do you see a problem with your argument, Mr. Cooper? 177 00:07:11,473 --> 00:07:13,183 I could concentrate better if you weren't 178 00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:15,352 flashing your toes at me. 179 00:07:15,352 --> 00:07:17,520 Billy's a sweet kid. 180 00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:20,982 But these middle schoolers are gonna eat him alive. 181 00:07:20,982 --> 00:07:24,694 You don't know that. Maybe they'll be nice. 182 00:07:24,694 --> 00:07:26,363 Boy, if we were in middle school right now, 183 00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:28,657 I'd have your head in a toilet so fast. 184 00:07:28,657 --> 00:07:31,743 If you want, I can ask Missy to hang out with him, 185 00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:33,328 make sure things go okay. 186 00:07:33,328 --> 00:07:35,705 Absolutely not. Why? 187 00:07:35,705 --> 00:07:38,541 That girl is cute and sassy, 188 00:07:38,541 --> 00:07:40,502 and has a real chance at being popular. 189 00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:43,588 Do not take that from her. Or me. 190 00:07:43,588 --> 00:07:46,174 Popularity isn't that important. 191 00:07:46,174 --> 00:07:48,677 It is the most important. 192 00:07:48,677 --> 00:07:51,012 Look at us. I'm miserable. 193 00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:53,765 You're always worried about something. 194 00:07:53,765 --> 00:07:57,268 I'd like one girl around here to win. 195 00:07:57,268 --> 00:08:00,063 I'm not always worried. 196 00:08:00,063 --> 00:08:02,315 It's Sheldon's first day of college, 197 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:04,275 and you're not freaking out? 198 00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:06,027 It's on my mind. Mm. 199 00:08:06,027 --> 00:08:08,988 But he's been looking forward to this for a long time. 200 00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:11,449 I'm sure he's having a wonderful day. 201 00:08:11,449 --> 00:08:14,202 She displayed complete contempt for science. 202 00:08:14,202 --> 00:08:16,079 She claimed that knowledge was a myth, 203 00:08:16,079 --> 00:08:17,831 and then she told the class they could take their shoes off. 204 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,457 Some of them did. 205 00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:21,459 Luckily we've established you're a mature young man 206 00:08:21,459 --> 00:08:23,336 capable of figuring this out on his own, 207 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:25,130 so, go get 'em, sport. 208 00:08:25,130 --> 00:08:27,382 But as a man of science, aren't you offended by this? 209 00:08:27,382 --> 00:08:29,426 Sheldon, this is a college campus. 210 00:08:29,426 --> 00:08:31,052 You come across all sorts. 211 00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:32,929 Anarchists, communists, vegans. 212 00:08:32,929 --> 00:08:35,223 There's a fella in the religion department that believes God is 213 00:08:35,223 --> 00:08:37,726 two women, and their names are Wendy and Claire. 214 00:08:37,726 --> 00:08:39,978 But to say nobody actually knows anything, 215 00:08:39,978 --> 00:08:42,439 how could she know that? It's a contradiction. 216 00:08:42,439 --> 00:08:44,399 How about I blow some bubbles out of a bear's head 217 00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:45,984 and we call it a day? 218 00:08:45,984 --> 00:08:47,819 I don't know how I'm going to last all semester 219 00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:49,571 with this freewheeling hippy. 220 00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:51,531 Sheldon, I don't know what to tell you. 221 00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,658 If you're that unhappy, just drop the class. 222 00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:56,911 Of course. Drop the class. 223 00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,788 This is college. I can do that. 224 00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:00,915 There you go. Thank you. 225 00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:02,959 You're welcome. From now on, 226 00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:04,919 I'm coming to you with all my problems. 227 00:09:04,919 --> 00:09:06,546 Oh... 228 00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:15,096 "The statement on the other side of this sign is true." 229 00:09:17,932 --> 00:09:18,933 Ugh. 230 00:09:18,933 --> 00:09:21,269 Professor Ericson? 231 00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:23,313 ERICSON: Come in. 232 00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:27,942 Mr. Cooper, welcome. How can I help you? 233 00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:29,778 I would like to drop your class. 234 00:09:29,778 --> 00:09:31,654 Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. 235 00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:34,449 I enjoyed our discussion about skepticism. 236 00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:35,784 And butterflies. 237 00:09:35,784 --> 00:09:37,368 I'm a scientist, and I don't find 238 00:09:37,368 --> 00:09:39,162 those types of questions worth my time. 239 00:09:39,162 --> 00:09:41,664 And butterflies are just worms that can chase you. 240 00:09:41,664 --> 00:09:44,125 (laughs softly) The questions of philosophy 241 00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:46,169 are extremely challenging. 242 00:09:46,169 --> 00:09:48,296 People have spent 2,000-plus years 243 00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:50,632 trying to solve them without success. 244 00:09:50,632 --> 00:09:54,969 So if you feel like giving up, I don't blame you. 245 00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:56,596 I'm not giving up. 246 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,181 I'm saying they're not important. 247 00:09:58,181 --> 00:10:01,392 Okay, so what is important? 248 00:10:01,392 --> 00:10:03,311 The acquisition of factual knowledge. 249 00:10:03,311 --> 00:10:06,064 And how do you know if something is factual? 250 00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:08,191 You test it and see if it holds true. 251 00:10:08,191 --> 00:10:10,652 And how do you know that that's factual? 252 00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:13,655 (strains): You're doing it again. 253 00:10:13,655 --> 00:10:15,907 Maybe you're dreaming I'm doing it. 254 00:10:15,907 --> 00:10:17,408 How was your first day? 255 00:10:17,408 --> 00:10:19,327 Infuriating. 256 00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:20,995 How was your first day? 257 00:10:20,995 --> 00:10:22,330 So good. 258 00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:23,873 How was your first day? 259 00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:32,090 And then she said, "Maybe you're just dreaming." 260 00:10:32,090 --> 00:10:34,217 Are you gonna drop the class? Yes, 261 00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:36,469 but only after I systematically destroy 262 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:39,347 her half-baked arguments in front of everybody else. 263 00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:41,724 It's good to have goals. 264 00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:43,351 And at lunch, an eighth-grade boy said, 265 00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:46,020 and I quote, "I like Funyuns, too." 266 00:10:46,020 --> 00:10:47,564 Wow. 267 00:10:47,564 --> 00:10:48,731 I know. 268 00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:53,862 I stopped at the library today and picked up 269 00:10:53,862 --> 00:10:56,656 books on epistemology, Descartes's dream argument 270 00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:59,117 and the foundations of scientific logic. 271 00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:00,785 Do you know what she's going to do? 272 00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:02,453 Rue the day? 273 00:11:02,453 --> 00:11:03,788 The day, the night. If it's rue-able, 274 00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:05,957 she's going to rue it. 275 00:11:05,957 --> 00:11:07,709 And in math class, I sit right between 276 00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:09,043 Heather M. and Heather B. 277 00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:11,254 It's nice you're with your friends. 278 00:11:11,254 --> 00:11:13,548 It's more than nice. All notes go through me. 279 00:11:13,548 --> 00:11:15,550 That's power. 280 00:11:15,550 --> 00:11:18,094 ♪ She's my cherry pie ♪ 281 00:11:18,094 --> 00:11:20,263 ♪ Cool drink of water, such a sweet surprise ♪ 282 00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,892 ♪ Tastes so good, make a grown man cry ♪ 283 00:11:23,892 --> 00:11:28,229 ♪ Sweet cherry pie, yeah. ♪ 284 00:11:33,192 --> 00:11:35,320 ADULT SHELDON: The good name of Lady Science 285 00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:38,615 had been besmirched and it was up to me to defend her honor. 286 00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:40,909 I had a lot of ground to cover in one night. 287 00:11:40,909 --> 00:11:44,203 Thankfully, 11 years of my family's incessant yammering 288 00:11:44,203 --> 00:11:47,415 had given me an extraordinary ability to focus. 289 00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:49,417 But I want to watch Fresh Prince. 290 00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:51,085 Too bad. The game is on. 291 00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,837 There's always a game on. Dad? 292 00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:54,464 Sorry, kid, it's the Cowboys. 293 00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:55,882 But it's the season premiere. 294 00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:57,216 Fresh Prince's family gets tickets 295 00:11:57,216 --> 00:11:58,593 to the People's Choice Awards. 296 00:11:58,593 --> 00:12:00,136 I'm not missing it. 297 00:12:00,136 --> 00:12:01,554 "Present investigations aim to establish 298 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:03,514 "a constructional system. 299 00:12:03,514 --> 00:12:06,059 That is, an epistemic, logical system of objects..." 300 00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,186 My show's only 30 minutes. 301 00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:09,938 Yours is three hours. 302 00:12:09,938 --> 00:12:11,105 But yours don't have them cheerleaders 303 00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:13,107 jumping up and down. Mom? 304 00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:16,235 What if we don't turn the TV on at all and we play a board game? 305 00:12:16,235 --> 00:12:17,654 Come on. Seriously? 306 00:12:17,654 --> 00:12:19,364 SHELDON: "So that a genealogy 307 00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:20,406 "of concepts results, in which each one 308 00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:21,741 has its definite place." 309 00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,117 MARY: Shelly, it's your turn. 310 00:12:23,117 --> 00:12:24,535 Shelly? 311 00:12:24,535 --> 00:12:26,120 What's happening? 312 00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:28,122 We're playing a board game. 313 00:12:28,122 --> 00:12:29,207 Before dinner? 314 00:12:29,207 --> 00:12:31,292 You ate dinner. 315 00:12:31,292 --> 00:12:32,293 (doorbell rings) 316 00:12:32,293 --> 00:12:33,503 Did I like it? 317 00:12:33,503 --> 00:12:35,129 You said the meat loaf was dry. 318 00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:36,673 That sounds right. 319 00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:43,137 Hi, Brenda. I just wanted to see how today went. 320 00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:45,348 Oh. (clears throat) 321 00:12:47,517 --> 00:12:49,644 (groans) Not great. 322 00:12:49,644 --> 00:12:51,312 Sheldon is already in some sort of fight 323 00:12:51,312 --> 00:12:53,314 with his philosophy professor. 324 00:12:53,314 --> 00:12:55,775 About what? Currently, he's plotting 325 00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:58,277 "the destruction of her worldview," 326 00:12:58,277 --> 00:13:00,655 whatever that means. Sounds exciting. 327 00:13:00,655 --> 00:13:03,491 It's mostly him reading a book and giggling to himself. 328 00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:05,159 How about Billy? 329 00:13:05,159 --> 00:13:06,411 Not much better. 330 00:13:06,411 --> 00:13:08,496 Oh. In Spanish class, 331 00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:10,331 every time the teacher said "Sí," Billy said, "See what?" 332 00:13:10,331 --> 00:13:12,417 Oh, Billy. 333 00:13:12,417 --> 00:13:16,004 I know, but if I don't laugh about it I'll cry. 334 00:13:16,004 --> 00:13:17,171 I'm sorry. 335 00:13:17,171 --> 00:13:18,631 How did Missy do? 336 00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:20,675 I think Missy had the best day of her life. 337 00:13:20,675 --> 00:13:22,927 (exhales): Oh, thank God. Tell me everything. 338 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:27,098 Well, in one class she sits between her friends, 339 00:13:27,098 --> 00:13:29,183 so the note-passing goes through her. 340 00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:32,061 She's gonna get the dirt firsthand. That's huge. 341 00:13:32,061 --> 00:13:34,564 And then an eighth-grade boy talked to her at lunch. 342 00:13:34,564 --> 00:13:36,190 On the first day? Uh-huh. 343 00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:38,192 She's gonna be prom queen. I'm calling it. 344 00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:39,694 (laughs) That's fun, 345 00:13:39,694 --> 00:13:42,530 but let's not get ahead of ourselves. 346 00:13:42,530 --> 00:13:44,699 Mary, it'll be a miracle 347 00:13:44,699 --> 00:13:46,909 if Billy even makes it to high school. 348 00:13:46,909 --> 00:13:48,536 Don't take this away from me. 349 00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:52,540 Missy is gonna look so cute in that tiara. 350 00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:53,499 Yes, she is. 351 00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:55,043 That's the Fresh Prince. 352 00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,711 He's from West Philadelphia. 353 00:13:56,711 --> 00:13:58,296 Born and raised. 354 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:01,966 ADULT SHELDON: It was past my bedtime, 355 00:14:01,966 --> 00:14:04,218 but who could sleep with a page-turner 356 00:14:04,218 --> 00:14:07,388 like Meditations on First Philosophy by René Descartes? 357 00:14:07,388 --> 00:14:09,515 Descartes was more than just a philosopher. 358 00:14:09,515 --> 00:14:11,517 He was also the mathematician 359 00:14:11,517 --> 00:14:13,728 who invented the Cartesian plane. 360 00:14:13,728 --> 00:14:15,605 If you've ever enjoyed that X squared 361 00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:17,774 plus Y squared equals K is a circle, 362 00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:20,193 you can say merci beaucoup to Monsieur Descartes. 363 00:14:27,575 --> 00:14:29,077 Hello? 364 00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:30,620 Bonjour, Sheldon. 365 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,497 Bonjour, René Descartes. 366 00:14:32,497 --> 00:14:34,332 Please, sit. 367 00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:41,089 I see you're reading a book on philosophy by Aristotle. 368 00:14:41,089 --> 00:14:44,675 I am. And it is garbage! 369 00:14:44,675 --> 00:14:48,846 Aristotle is, how you say, a punk! 370 00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:54,769 I'm also having trouble with my philosophy professor. 371 00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:57,438 Hmm? She says that we don't know if science is true. 372 00:14:57,438 --> 00:14:59,107 Mon dieu! 373 00:14:59,107 --> 00:15:01,734 Without science, we know nothing. 374 00:15:01,734 --> 00:15:05,279 No different than the dogs and kitties in the street 375 00:15:05,279 --> 00:15:08,116 wandering around in a fog of ignorance 376 00:15:08,116 --> 00:15:10,618 with the woofings and the meowings. 377 00:15:10,618 --> 00:15:12,411 So how do I get her to understand that science 378 00:15:12,411 --> 00:15:15,456 can form true beliefs about reality as it really is? 379 00:15:15,456 --> 00:15:17,583 Ah, young man. 380 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:20,086 You are you asking what is the foundation 381 00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,963 of knowledge, huh? 382 00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:25,133 Yes. Well, hold on to your chapeau. 383 00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:26,300 I'm not wearing a chapeau. 384 00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:28,136 It is just an expression. 385 00:15:28,136 --> 00:15:29,178 Sorry. 386 00:15:29,178 --> 00:15:31,264 All knowledge must rest 387 00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:36,102 on a foundation that we can never doubt and that is... 388 00:15:37,061 --> 00:15:39,063 Of course. 389 00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:40,481 ERICSON: So we learned that the theory of knowledge 390 00:15:40,481 --> 00:15:42,984 poses some very serious problems. 391 00:15:42,984 --> 00:15:45,486 Excuse me, Professor Ericson. 392 00:15:45,486 --> 00:15:48,865 I've done a little reading since last we spoke, and I'm prepared 393 00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:51,993 to show you that everything we know about science is true. 394 00:15:51,993 --> 00:15:53,828 Well, I am all ears. 395 00:15:53,828 --> 00:15:57,123 You said I couldn't truly know anything, 396 00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:58,583 but there is one thing that I do know. 397 00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:01,669 If I question, I must think; 398 00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:03,462 if I think, I must exist. 399 00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:09,218 Cogito, ergo sum: I think, therefore I am. 400 00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:12,555 You're right. 401 00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:14,348 You're darn right I'm right. 402 00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:17,560 Guys, g-give it up for Sheldon. 403 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:19,270 (applause) 404 00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:22,398 Now for a job well done... 405 00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:26,527 ...here is a flower full of sweet nectar. 406 00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:28,362 Why would I want that? 407 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:31,032 Because you're a butterfly and this is just your dream. 408 00:16:31,032 --> 00:16:32,783 I'm not a butterfly. 409 00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:34,869 Are you sure? (laughs) 410 00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:36,412 (laughter echoing) 411 00:16:37,872 --> 00:16:39,248 (gasps) 412 00:16:39,248 --> 00:16:42,710 (sighs) It was a dream. 413 00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:43,878 Oh, no. 414 00:16:43,878 --> 00:16:46,547 (grunts) Help! 415 00:16:46,547 --> 00:16:48,466 I'm a butterfly! 416 00:16:48,466 --> 00:16:51,260 Nothing I know is real! Everything is a dream! 417 00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:52,803 Missy, help! 418 00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:57,600 No! 419 00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,101 (gasps) 420 00:17:00,603 --> 00:17:01,771 Missy, 421 00:17:01,771 --> 00:17:02,730 am I awake 422 00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:03,898 or is this a dream? 423 00:17:03,898 --> 00:17:06,108 Shut up, dingus. 424 00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:07,652 Okay, I'm awake. 425 00:17:11,614 --> 00:17:14,659 Shelly, you feeling all right? 426 00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:16,244 Yes. 427 00:17:16,244 --> 00:17:17,495 How come you're not dressed? 428 00:17:17,495 --> 00:17:18,913 Why should I? 429 00:17:18,913 --> 00:17:21,290 'Cause you're gonna be late for school. 430 00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,918 I'm not going to school. Why not? 431 00:17:23,918 --> 00:17:26,087 Because I don't know what's real. 432 00:17:26,087 --> 00:17:27,255 What does that mean? 433 00:17:27,255 --> 00:17:28,923 Dreaming and waking, 434 00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:32,551 life and death, philosophers and butterflies, 435 00:17:32,551 --> 00:17:35,263 they're all the same. 436 00:17:35,263 --> 00:17:37,598 Nothing matters. 437 00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:41,269 That's an interesting way of looking at things. 438 00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:43,271 George?