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00:00:07,181 --> 00:00:08,649
ADULT SHELDON: Presenting...
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00:00:08,652 --> 00:00:12,696
"Sledon Cooper's Top Five Sources
of News From My Childgood".
3
00:00:12,699 --> 00:00:13,884
Number five:
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00:00:13,887 --> 00:00:16,326
Star Trek Fan Club Magazine.
5
00:00:16,329 --> 00:00:20,087
Mom, DeForest Kelley's favorite
episode is "The Empath."
6
00:00:20,090 --> 00:00:21,437
Good to know.
7
00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:23,460
ADULT SHELDON: Number
four: the Weather Cube
8
00:00:23,463 --> 00:00:24,923
from RadioShack.
9
00:00:24,926 --> 00:00:26,926
ANNOUNCER [over device]:
The humidity is 90%
10
00:00:26,929 --> 00:00:29,678
with a dew point of 79.5 degrees.
11
00:00:29,681 --> 00:00:30,787
Mom!
12
00:00:30,790 --> 00:00:33,584
The dew point is 79.5 degrees.
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MARY: Okay.
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00:00:34,904 --> 00:00:36,251
ADULT SHELDON: Number three:
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00:00:36,253 --> 00:00:38,210
The MacNeil/Lehrer NewsHour.
16
00:00:38,212 --> 00:00:40,212
Such a great theme song.
17
00:00:40,214 --> 00:00:41,387
♪
18
00:00:41,389 --> 00:00:43,476
♪ Buh-buh-bum. ♪
19
00:00:43,478 --> 00:00:44,651
ADULT SHELDON: Number two:
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00:00:44,653 --> 00:00:46,870
Meemaw after a few beers.
21
00:00:46,872 --> 00:00:49,047
It took a while, but we
finally picked a new name
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00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,790
for my bowling team: The Ball Busters.
23
00:00:52,617 --> 00:00:53,931
Hey, Mom.
24
00:00:53,934 --> 00:00:56,401
Guess what Meemaw named her
bowling team? The Ball...
25
00:00:56,404 --> 00:00:57,751
ADULT SHELDON: And the number one source
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00:00:57,753 --> 00:00:59,579
of news from my childhood:
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00:00:59,581 --> 00:01:02,438
the bulletin board at the train store.
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00:01:04,095 --> 00:01:06,951
News about trains in
a store full of trains.
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00:01:06,954 --> 00:01:08,153
Yummy.
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How did this not make The
MacNeil/Lehrer NewsHour?
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[train whistles]
32
00:01:13,115 --> 00:01:15,289
The train museum's looking for a docent.
33
00:01:15,292 --> 00:01:16,524
What's a docent?
34
00:01:16,527 --> 00:01:18,076
It's a person in a museum
35
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:20,080
who gives informationon the exhibits.
36
00:01:21,071 --> 00:01:23,506
Do you think they'd let
someone your age do that?
37
00:01:23,509 --> 00:01:25,814
Why not? I have a high school diploma.
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00:01:25,817 --> 00:01:26,990
True.
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00:01:26,993 --> 00:01:28,999
I know more about trains than anybody.
40
00:01:29,001 --> 00:01:30,175
True.
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00:01:30,177 --> 00:01:31,611
And I have the unique ability
42
00:01:31,613 --> 00:01:33,615
to wear people down until I get my way.
43
00:01:34,659 --> 00:01:36,487
So true.
44
00:01:40,535 --> 00:01:44,406
Hello. I understand you're
looking for a docent.
45
00:01:44,408 --> 00:01:46,408
I'm 11 years old, but you should know
46
00:01:46,410 --> 00:01:47,727
I have a high school diploma
47
00:01:47,730 --> 00:01:50,369
and I know more about
trains than anybody.
48
00:01:50,371 --> 00:01:52,762
You still sound on the fence.
49
00:01:52,764 --> 00:01:55,548
ADULT SHELDON: It was time to
break out my unique ability.
50
00:01:55,550 --> 00:01:58,072
Let me tell you about
every model train I own
51
00:01:58,074 --> 00:01:59,813
and what each of them means to me.
52
00:01:59,815 --> 00:02:01,597
The first locomotive I ever received...
53
00:02:01,599 --> 00:02:04,165
ADULT SHELDON: Wouldn't you
know it, 47 short minutes later,
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00:02:04,167 --> 00:02:05,993
I got the job.
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00:02:05,995 --> 00:02:08,996
♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪
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00:02:08,998 --> 00:02:11,825
♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
57
00:02:11,827 --> 00:02:14,571
♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
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00:02:14,574 --> 00:02:17,634
♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
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00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:23,374
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
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00:02:24,538 --> 00:02:27,163
- You put your cleats in the truck?
- Yep.
61
00:02:27,166 --> 00:02:29,502
We should hit the road
soon. It's a long drive.
62
00:02:29,505 --> 00:02:32,497
- Okay.
- I got your lunches here.
63
00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:33,851
Extra Fruit Roll-Ups?
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00:02:33,854 --> 00:02:35,362
- You each got two.
- Thank you.
65
00:02:35,365 --> 00:02:36,374
Thank you.
66
00:02:36,377 --> 00:02:38,807
- What time is the game?
- 12:30.
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00:02:38,810 --> 00:02:40,375
Why are we talking about baseball
68
00:02:40,377 --> 00:02:42,249
and not my impending docent-hood?
69
00:02:42,252 --> 00:02:43,859
Who wants to tell him it's stupid?
70
00:02:43,862 --> 00:02:46,067
- Leave it alone.
- And why do they make you wear
71
00:02:46,070 --> 00:02:47,513
that goofy costume?
72
00:02:47,515 --> 00:02:50,059
Ha. They don't. This is all me.
73
00:02:50,062 --> 00:02:51,865
What do you got going on today?
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00:02:51,867 --> 00:02:53,171
Ooh, laundry,
75
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,216
grocery shopping, vacuuming.
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00:02:55,218 --> 00:02:57,468
I might go nuts and
dust the picture frames.
77
00:02:57,471 --> 00:02:59,993
Well, nice. Everybody's
doing something they love.
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00:02:59,996 --> 00:03:03,571
Sheldon, you sure about this?
79
00:03:03,574 --> 00:03:06,227
Yes, leave the crusts on.
80
00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:07,926
I'm a docent now.
81
00:03:09,537 --> 00:03:11,537
Thanks for bringing me.
82
00:03:11,539 --> 00:03:13,016
Hey, it got me out
of driving all the way
83
00:03:13,018 --> 00:03:15,499
to Missy's game; I
should be thanking you.
84
00:03:19,767 --> 00:03:21,680
My little knuckles
might not be cutting it.
85
00:03:21,683 --> 00:03:23,016
Would you give it a go?
86
00:03:23,019 --> 00:03:24,985
Sure.
87
00:03:24,988 --> 00:03:26,074
How's that?
88
00:03:26,077 --> 00:03:27,813
Four knocks. Bold.
89
00:03:27,816 --> 00:03:29,249
[chuckles]
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00:03:29,252 --> 00:03:31,121
Hello, hello.
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00:03:31,123 --> 00:03:34,690
Volunteer docent Sheldon
Cooper reporting for duty.
92
00:03:34,692 --> 00:03:36,388
Welcome aboard.
93
00:03:36,390 --> 00:03:39,567
Train nomenclature right
out of the gate. Promising.
94
00:03:42,381 --> 00:03:44,274
I like your conductor's uniform.
95
00:03:44,277 --> 00:03:47,049
You know what they say.
Dress for the job you want.
96
00:03:47,052 --> 00:03:49,086
Do I get an "ask me" button, too?
97
00:03:49,089 --> 00:03:51,742
Well, thank you for
asking, and yes, you do.
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00:03:51,745 --> 00:03:53,963
I'll be right back.
99
00:03:53,966 --> 00:03:55,530
Do you see that bell?
100
00:03:55,533 --> 00:03:58,821
That's from Texas and New
Orleans locomotive number 701.
101
00:03:58,824 --> 00:04:00,693
I'd tell you more, but
you haven't contributed
102
00:04:00,696 --> 00:04:02,117
the suggested donation.
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00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:14,077
Number 701 was built in 1930by
the Baldwin Locomotive Works.
104
00:04:14,079 --> 00:04:17,385
It was a superheated 4-8-4 class GS-1
105
00:04:17,387 --> 00:04:19,387
- with 7...
- I want my money back.
106
00:04:19,389 --> 00:04:20,780
Here you go.
107
00:04:20,782 --> 00:04:22,336
Thank you.
108
00:04:22,339 --> 00:04:24,185
I know you're supposed
to pick me up at 4:00,
109
00:04:24,188 --> 00:04:25,437
but I may live here now.
110
00:04:25,439 --> 00:04:27,354
Send me a Christmas card.
111
00:04:28,398 --> 00:04:30,703
I'm glad Mom didn't come.
112
00:04:30,706 --> 00:04:31,922
Why's that?
113
00:04:31,925 --> 00:04:33,884
I can spit when I'm on the mound.
114
00:04:34,625 --> 00:04:36,529
You can hock up anything you want today.
115
00:04:36,532 --> 00:04:37,623
[snorts]
116
00:04:37,625 --> 00:04:40,147
- Not here.
- Aw.
117
00:04:40,149 --> 00:04:42,219
We need to stop so I can pee.
118
00:04:42,222 --> 00:04:44,483
I told you to pee
before we left the house.
119
00:04:44,486 --> 00:04:46,544
That was an hour and a half ago.
120
00:04:46,547 --> 00:04:48,508
[sighs] Can't you hold it?
121
00:04:48,511 --> 00:04:50,145
I may spit like a man,
122
00:04:50,148 --> 00:04:52,086
but I have the bladder of a little girl.
123
00:04:53,782 --> 00:04:55,295
[whirring]
124
00:04:57,009 --> 00:04:58,312
I'm going to work.
125
00:04:58,315 --> 00:05:00,402
Okay, have fun.
126
00:05:00,405 --> 00:05:02,753
What-what time do you
think you'll be back?
127
00:05:02,756 --> 00:05:03,973
Before dinner.
128
00:05:03,976 --> 00:05:05,630
See you then.
129
00:05:07,916 --> 00:05:09,655
[door closes]
130
00:05:09,657 --> 00:05:11,006
[vacuum stops]
131
00:05:12,950 --> 00:05:15,680
And my day off begins.
132
00:05:15,683 --> 00:05:17,977
Just let me know if
you have any questions.
133
00:05:20,058 --> 00:05:22,039
This is a very nice builder's plate.
134
00:05:22,042 --> 00:05:23,868
How can you be sure it's not a replica?
135
00:05:23,871 --> 00:05:25,782
Now, that is a great question.
136
00:05:25,785 --> 00:05:28,760
Thank you. I also know
the answer. Do you?
137
00:05:28,763 --> 00:05:32,336
Well, there's, uh, rust
and soot on the back of it
138
00:05:32,339 --> 00:05:35,506
from when it was mounted
to the engine's smokebox.
139
00:05:35,509 --> 00:05:37,900
Very good.
140
00:05:37,902 --> 00:05:39,797
Ah, the 1937
141
00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:41,626
Santa Fe diesel.
142
00:05:41,629 --> 00:05:43,324
I've always loved that paint scheme.
143
00:05:43,327 --> 00:05:45,603
I wonder if they had a name for it.
144
00:05:45,606 --> 00:05:47,258
Cat's Whiskers.
145
00:05:47,261 --> 00:05:48,289
Correct.
146
00:05:48,292 --> 00:05:49,711
Ha! Two for two.
147
00:05:49,714 --> 00:05:51,217
Did you know that the word "train"
148
00:05:51,220 --> 00:05:53,046
comes from the French verb traîner,
149
00:05:53,048 --> 00:05:54,750
which means to draw or drag?
150
00:05:54,753 --> 00:05:57,057
[chuckles]: Well, I
just learned something.
151
00:05:57,060 --> 00:05:58,719
Well, if you enjoy learning things,
152
00:05:58,722 --> 00:06:01,883
then you and I are on the
fast track to friendship.
153
00:06:01,886 --> 00:06:03,110
Speaking of fast tracks,
154
00:06:03,113 --> 00:06:05,563
the Japanese bullet
train, or Shinkansen...
155
00:06:16,071 --> 00:06:18,073
[exhales]
156
00:06:20,684 --> 00:06:22,162
Ready to roll?
157
00:06:22,165 --> 00:06:24,123
Not really.
158
00:06:25,198 --> 00:06:26,677
What's wrong?
159
00:06:27,628 --> 00:06:29,456
It happened.
160
00:06:30,313 --> 00:06:32,400
What happened?
161
00:06:32,403 --> 00:06:37,532
That thing that happens to girls
162
00:06:37,535 --> 00:06:40,235
when they're becoming young ladies.
163
00:06:41,874 --> 00:06:44,136
What? Now?
164
00:06:44,139 --> 00:06:46,271
I'm not happy about it, either.
165
00:06:47,597 --> 00:06:49,119
[stammers] Should we go home?
166
00:06:49,122 --> 00:06:50,735
I'm pitching in an hour.
167
00:06:50,738 --> 00:06:52,453
I... you think that's a good idea?
168
00:06:52,456 --> 00:06:53,629
Maybe you need to lie down.
169
00:06:53,632 --> 00:06:54,805
I don't need to lie down.
170
00:06:54,808 --> 00:06:56,978
Okay, well, maybe I need to lie down.
171
00:06:56,981 --> 00:06:58,844
[sighs]
172
00:07:03,684 --> 00:07:06,032
Okay, we're gonna find a pay
phone and call your mother.
173
00:07:06,034 --> 00:07:07,821
She's not here right
now. What can she do?
174
00:07:07,824 --> 00:07:09,860
Well, I don't know what to do.
175
00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:12,472
We're gonna go to a
drugstore and get what I need.
176
00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:14,475
Go to a drug store.
177
00:07:14,477 --> 00:07:16,521
Okay, I can do that.
178
00:07:16,523 --> 00:07:19,219
Breathe. We're gonna get through this.
179
00:07:19,221 --> 00:07:21,223
[exhales sharply]
180
00:07:22,485 --> 00:07:24,006
SHELDON: It's almost opening time.
181
00:07:24,008 --> 00:07:25,355
Can I flip the sign?
182
00:07:25,357 --> 00:07:26,446
Have at it.
183
00:07:30,537 --> 00:07:33,059
Five, four,
184
00:07:33,061 --> 00:07:36,541
three, two, one.
185
00:07:36,543 --> 00:07:38,821
We're officially open for business.
186
00:07:45,900 --> 00:07:48,248
Anticlimactic.
187
00:07:48,250 --> 00:07:50,382
[motorcycle revs over TV]
188
00:07:54,804 --> 00:07:57,154
Get him, Dalton. Get him.
189
00:07:58,565 --> 00:07:59,794
GEORGE JR.: Mary Cooper,
190
00:07:59,797 --> 00:08:01,522
what are you doing?
191
00:08:01,524 --> 00:08:02,567
Nothing.
192
00:08:02,569 --> 00:08:04,264
Why are you watching Road House?
193
00:08:04,266 --> 00:08:06,032
Why aren't you at work?
194
00:08:06,035 --> 00:08:07,614
I asked you first, and my question
195
00:08:07,617 --> 00:08:08,966
is way more interesting.
196
00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:11,619
It was just on.
197
00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:13,142
I don't even know what that is.
198
00:08:13,144 --> 00:08:15,582
Then how'd you know his name's Dalton?
199
00:08:17,148 --> 00:08:19,497
I don't have to explain myself to you.
200
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,107
This is a pretty dirty movie.
201
00:08:21,109 --> 00:08:24,240
How do you know? It is rated R.
202
00:08:24,242 --> 00:08:26,416
For violence, language
and sexual content.
203
00:08:26,418 --> 00:08:29,073
You should be ashamed of yourself.
204
00:08:33,313 --> 00:08:35,349
GEORGE SR.: Nothing to
be embarrassed about.
205
00:08:35,352 --> 00:08:37,321
It's perfectly natural.
Perfectly normal.
206
00:08:37,324 --> 00:08:38,820
Dad, I know.
207
00:08:38,822 --> 00:08:40,430
I'm telling myself.
208
00:08:40,432 --> 00:08:42,607
Uh...
209
00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:44,696
How much money you need?
210
00:08:44,698 --> 00:08:46,698
I'm not going in there. You are.
211
00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:49,117
Why can't you go? It's embarrassing.
212
00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:51,414
You just said it wasn't embarrassing.
213
00:08:51,417 --> 00:08:52,938
Well, it is and I lied.
214
00:08:52,941 --> 00:08:54,357
♪ Whoa... ♪
215
00:08:54,359 --> 00:08:56,272
Excuse me.
216
00:08:56,274 --> 00:08:59,406
Hello. Welcome to the
Lone Star Train Museum.
217
00:08:59,408 --> 00:09:00,929
I'm Docent Sheldon Cooper.
218
00:09:00,931 --> 00:09:02,943
If you have any questions...
219
00:09:02,946 --> 00:09:04,513
You know where the bathroom is?
220
00:09:04,516 --> 00:09:06,935
Indeed I do. You'll want to chug along
221
00:09:06,938 --> 00:09:08,935
past our authentic 1928
222
00:09:08,938 --> 00:09:11,232
Southern Pacific Sunset limited whistle,
223
00:09:11,235 --> 00:09:13,278
then keep going past
our conductor's uniform,
224
00:09:13,281 --> 00:09:15,421
which was worn on the
Texas and Pacific Railway.
225
00:09:15,424 --> 00:09:16,466
Then you'll come upon...
226
00:09:16,469 --> 00:09:18,424
Son, I have to take a leak.
227
00:09:18,427 --> 00:09:20,607
- It's in the back.
- Thank you.
228
00:09:20,610 --> 00:09:22,865
And our toilets flush,
unlike the ones on trains
229
00:09:22,868 --> 00:09:24,911
before 1889.
230
00:09:24,914 --> 00:09:26,868
[train whistle blows]
231
00:09:26,870 --> 00:09:28,609
This is a genuinelocomotive bell
232
00:09:28,611 --> 00:09:31,388
from Texas and New Orleans number 701.
233
00:09:31,391 --> 00:09:33,961
Now there's a proper technique
to make the purest sound.
234
00:09:33,964 --> 00:09:35,485
Most people don't know how to do that.
235
00:09:35,487 --> 00:09:37,052
But you're in luck, because I do.
236
00:09:37,054 --> 00:09:38,706
[bell ringing]
237
00:09:38,708 --> 00:09:41,317
♪ And I still wouldn't let her go ♪
238
00:09:41,319 --> 00:09:44,240
♪ Better be on your way, get along... ♪
239
00:09:44,243 --> 00:09:45,294
[train whistle blows]
240
00:09:45,297 --> 00:09:47,148
You want to know more
about the Cotton Belt,
241
00:09:47,151 --> 00:09:48,716
there's plenty in here.
242
00:09:48,718 --> 00:09:51,501
Although the facts in
that brochure are suspect.
243
00:09:51,503 --> 00:09:53,591
[chuckles] Sheldon, I, uh,
244
00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:55,479
I wrote this brochure.
245
00:09:55,482 --> 00:09:57,525
While the origins of the
Southern Pacific go back
246
00:09:57,528 --> 00:10:01,576
to 1848, the company wasn't
formally started until 1865.
247
00:10:02,961 --> 00:10:05,875
And before you reprint
these, we should talk fonts.
248
00:10:05,878 --> 00:10:07,995
[train whistle blows]
249
00:10:07,998 --> 00:10:10,172
See? It's all in the wrist.
250
00:10:10,174 --> 00:10:11,948
♪ Train kept a-rollin'
all night long... ♪
251
00:10:11,951 --> 00:10:13,299
[train whistle blows]
252
00:10:13,302 --> 00:10:15,524
And early trains used
the drop chute toilet,
253
00:10:15,527 --> 00:10:18,441
also called the hopper toilet,
which was really just a hole...
254
00:10:18,443 --> 00:10:21,488
Couldn't you just
listen to this all day?
255
00:10:21,490 --> 00:10:24,729
♪ And I still wouldn't let her go. ♪
256
00:10:29,041 --> 00:10:31,716
So how many times have
you seen Road House?
257
00:10:31,718 --> 00:10:34,198
Sorry, can't hear you.
258
00:10:34,201 --> 00:10:35,721
More or less than five?
259
00:10:35,724 --> 00:10:37,289
'Cause that'show many
times I've seen it.
260
00:10:37,291 --> 00:10:39,283
That's how many years
you're gonna be grounded
261
00:10:39,286 --> 00:10:41,155
if you don't drop it right now.
262
00:10:41,158 --> 00:10:42,984
Does Dad know you like this movie?
263
00:10:42,987 --> 00:10:44,117
[vacuum stops]
264
00:10:44,120 --> 00:10:46,816
No, and it is gonna stay that way.
265
00:10:46,819 --> 00:10:49,341
- Why?
- Because it is not
266
00:10:49,344 --> 00:10:51,083
something I should be watching.
267
00:10:51,086 --> 00:10:52,695
Then why are you watching it?
268
00:10:54,610 --> 00:10:58,133
It is a guilty pleasure,
so will you drop it now?
269
00:10:58,135 --> 00:11:00,266
Relax.
270
00:11:00,268 --> 00:11:02,313
I ain't gonna tell nobody.
271
00:11:04,751 --> 00:11:05,967
Thank you.
272
00:11:05,969 --> 00:11:08,363
I think it's awesome you like it.
273
00:11:11,714 --> 00:11:13,448
It is pretty cool how Dalton
274
00:11:13,451 --> 00:11:14,972
doesn't drive his Mercedes to the bar
275
00:11:14,975 --> 00:11:17,064
'cause he knows they're gonna trash it.
276
00:11:17,067 --> 00:11:18,327
Dalton's no dummy.
277
00:11:18,329 --> 00:11:19,830
No, sir.
278
00:11:19,833 --> 00:11:21,618
It's right over there in aisle two.
279
00:11:24,771 --> 00:11:26,455
Find everything you need today?
280
00:11:26,458 --> 00:11:27,981
Yeah, think so.
281
00:11:35,607 --> 00:11:37,085
[chuckles]
282
00:11:37,087 --> 00:11:38,306
[clears throat]
283
00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:43,613
You don't know what
you're doing, do you?
284
00:11:43,615 --> 00:11:45,441
No, ma'am.
285
00:11:45,443 --> 00:11:46,838
Would you like some help?
286
00:11:46,841 --> 00:11:48,182
Yes, ma'am, thank you, ma'am.
287
00:11:48,185 --> 00:11:50,144
Okay.
288
00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:53,451
[bell ringing]
289
00:11:55,105 --> 00:11:56,931
Uh...
290
00:11:56,933 --> 00:11:58,127
we need to talk.
291
00:11:58,130 --> 00:12:00,020
About this bell? You got it.
292
00:12:00,023 --> 00:12:02,850
Did you know different
engineers would often...
293
00:12:02,852 --> 00:12:04,809
Son?
294
00:12:04,811 --> 00:12:07,028
You're a sweet kid, but...
295
00:12:07,030 --> 00:12:08,900
I don't think this is working out.
296
00:12:08,902 --> 00:12:10,487
What? Why?
297
00:12:10,490 --> 00:12:12,604
I-I know everything there
is to know about trains.
298
00:12:12,607 --> 00:12:14,992
Well, you see now, that
there is the problem.
299
00:12:14,995 --> 00:12:17,948
People, when they come
here, they want to enjoy it.
300
00:12:17,951 --> 00:12:20,168
They don't want to get
lectured in the bathroom.
301
00:12:20,171 --> 00:12:22,026
And you have been correcting me
302
00:12:22,029 --> 00:12:24,221
in front of the visitors
all morning long.
303
00:12:24,224 --> 00:12:25,737
Would you prefer I send you a memo
304
00:12:25,740 --> 00:12:27,222
of your mistakes at the end of the day?
305
00:12:27,224 --> 00:12:28,354
- No.
- Because that's what I did
306
00:12:28,356 --> 00:12:29,456
for the teachers at my school.
307
00:12:29,458 --> 00:12:30,823
I think it brought us all closer.
308
00:12:30,826 --> 00:12:32,261
Sheldon, it's great to have knowledge.
309
00:12:32,263 --> 00:12:35,134
But you don't need to
show it off all the time.
310
00:12:35,137 --> 00:12:36,666
Oh, I don't mind.
311
00:12:36,668 --> 00:12:38,145
[chuckles]
312
00:12:38,148 --> 00:12:41,498
You see, trains are all
about balance, right?
313
00:12:41,501 --> 00:12:43,536
Now you put too much
water into a steam engine,
314
00:12:43,539 --> 00:12:44,950
it can't do its job.
315
00:12:44,953 --> 00:12:47,851
You let that water run
low... Boom, it'll blow up.
316
00:12:47,854 --> 00:12:50,289
Now, a good engineer
317
00:12:50,291 --> 00:12:52,813
makes sure he uses just
the right amount of water.
318
00:12:52,815 --> 00:12:55,250
Not too little, not too much.
319
00:12:55,252 --> 00:12:57,733
That make sense?
320
00:12:58,517 --> 00:13:00,865
The fireman adjusts the
water, not the engineer.
321
00:13:00,868 --> 00:13:02,981
And then he took my "ask me" button.
322
00:13:02,984 --> 00:13:05,130
He didn't even ask me. He just took it.
323
00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:14,617
Everybody gets fired
for something eventually.
324
00:13:14,619 --> 00:13:16,663
For being too goodat their job?
325
00:13:16,665 --> 00:13:19,057
Well, Moon Pie, sometimes you just get
326
00:13:19,059 --> 00:13:22,625
too excited about sharing
the facts in your head.
327
00:13:22,627 --> 00:13:25,150
But learning facts is the ant's pants.
328
00:13:25,152 --> 00:13:26,804
Which is the Australian derivation
329
00:13:26,806 --> 00:13:28,145
of the bee's knees.
330
00:13:28,148 --> 00:13:29,501
See, you just learned something.
331
00:13:29,504 --> 00:13:31,721
And wasn't that the cat's pajamas?
332
00:13:31,723 --> 00:13:34,986
Alls I'm saying is people
aren't always in the mood.
333
00:13:34,988 --> 00:13:36,596
Well, they should be.
334
00:13:36,598 --> 00:13:38,903
I'm happy to learnany fact at any time.
335
00:13:38,905 --> 00:13:40,339
Is that so?
336
00:13:40,341 --> 00:13:42,689
Yes.
337
00:13:42,691 --> 00:13:44,343
Grab my knitting bag.
338
00:13:44,345 --> 00:13:46,330
I don't recommend driving while knitting.
339
00:13:46,333 --> 00:13:48,260
Your reflexes aren't what
they used to be.
340
00:13:48,262 --> 00:13:50,349
Just look in the bag!
341
00:13:50,351 --> 00:13:51,959
Did you know
342
00:13:51,961 --> 00:13:54,483
that there are three
different kinds of yarn?
343
00:13:54,485 --> 00:13:55,614
I didn't.
344
00:13:55,617 --> 00:13:58,791
You got your animal, like wool.
345
00:13:58,794 --> 00:14:00,402
Your plant, like cotton.
346
00:14:00,404 --> 00:14:02,840
And your synthetic, like acrylic.
347
00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:03,971
Interesting.
348
00:14:03,973 --> 00:14:05,320
You think so?
349
00:14:05,322 --> 00:14:06,403
I'm glad to hear that.
350
00:14:06,406 --> 00:14:09,731
Because each one of them
has plusses and minuses,
351
00:14:09,734 --> 00:14:11,848
and you're about to hear them all
352
00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:15,115
in mind-numbing detail.
353
00:14:19,544 --> 00:14:20,901
Nothing to worry about.
354
00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:23,034
- We got this.
- Really?
355
00:14:23,036 --> 00:14:24,428
Everything you need's right here.
356
00:14:25,473 --> 00:14:27,214
You're the best.
357
00:14:28,258 --> 00:14:30,215
Come on, I'll show you
where the bathroom is.
358
00:14:30,217 --> 00:14:31,912
Oh, and there's a very helpful cashier
359
00:14:31,914 --> 00:14:33,392
named Gretchen you need to hug.
360
00:14:33,394 --> 00:14:34,569
Come on.
361
00:14:35,286 --> 00:14:36,656
Here she is, Gretchen.
362
00:14:36,658 --> 00:14:38,614
Another way
363
00:14:38,616 --> 00:14:40,921
to cast on in knitting
364
00:14:40,923 --> 00:14:42,880
is called the slingshot.
365
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:44,751
Did you know the
Wham-O company was named
366
00:14:44,753 --> 00:14:46,971
after its first product,
the Wham-O Slingshot?
367
00:14:46,973 --> 00:14:49,625
I'm the one saying the facts right now.
368
00:14:49,627 --> 00:14:51,627
Unless you're tired of hearing them?
369
00:14:51,629 --> 00:14:53,392
Sick of learning? Never.
370
00:14:53,395 --> 00:14:55,364
Well, that's too bad.
371
00:14:55,367 --> 00:14:58,503
How awesome was it when he
fights those four guys at once?
372
00:14:58,506 --> 00:15:00,375
They were asking for it.
373
00:15:00,377 --> 00:15:02,464
Dalton doesn't fight unless he has to.
374
00:15:02,466 --> 00:15:04,083
True, 'cause when the doctor says,
375
00:15:04,086 --> 00:15:05,990
"How many of these fights
you win?" he says...
376
00:15:05,992 --> 00:15:07,948
BOTH: Nobody ever wins in a fight.
377
00:15:07,950 --> 00:15:10,951
[both laugh]
378
00:15:10,953 --> 00:15:13,780
Mm, and I like how smart he is.
379
00:15:13,782 --> 00:15:15,747
But doesn't feel like
he has to show it off.
380
00:15:15,750 --> 00:15:16,793
No kidding.
381
00:15:16,796 --> 00:15:18,349
Maybe Sheldon should watch it.
382
00:15:18,352 --> 00:15:22,048
Hey, what was Dalton's third
rule of being a good bouncer?
383
00:15:22,051 --> 00:15:23,790
Be nice.
384
00:15:23,792 --> 00:15:25,359
That's right.
385
00:15:27,795 --> 00:15:30,274
I think Dad would love that
you're into stuff like this.
386
00:15:30,277 --> 00:15:32,103
I'm sure he would.
387
00:15:32,105 --> 00:15:34,583
He took me to see Mad Max twice.
388
00:15:34,585 --> 00:15:35,715
Really?
389
00:15:35,717 --> 00:15:37,325
Actually...
390
00:15:37,327 --> 00:15:39,632
the second time, we
couldn't find a sitter,
391
00:15:39,634 --> 00:15:41,286
so we brought you along.
392
00:15:41,288 --> 00:15:42,809
How old was I?
393
00:15:42,812 --> 00:15:44,985
I don't know... four?
394
00:15:44,987 --> 00:15:46,944
No wonder I'm so cool.
395
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,078
So, why you hiding it?
396
00:15:50,017 --> 00:15:53,192
Well, 'cause I'm supposed
to be a good Christian.
397
00:15:53,195 --> 00:15:56,286
Clearly this is something
I need to work on.
398
00:15:56,289 --> 00:16:00,173
Well, before you fix it,
you've got to watch Die Hard 2.
399
00:16:00,176 --> 00:16:03,397
Bruce Willis stabs a guy
in the head with an icicle.
400
00:16:05,399 --> 00:16:09,879
Now, circular knitting
produces a seamless tube.
401
00:16:09,881 --> 00:16:11,751
You already told me that.
402
00:16:11,753 --> 00:16:14,014
Oh, did I?
403
00:16:14,016 --> 00:16:16,190
Can we circle back to
double-pointed needles?
404
00:16:16,192 --> 00:16:17,844
I have a follow-up question.
405
00:16:17,846 --> 00:16:19,848
Hold that thought.
406
00:16:21,676 --> 00:16:24,374
[indistinct chatter]
407
00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:29,377
Strike two!
408
00:16:29,379 --> 00:16:31,162
- [crowd cheering]
- One more!
409
00:16:31,164 --> 00:16:32,992
Just like that!
410
00:16:37,638 --> 00:16:39,294
Strike three, you're out.
411
00:16:39,297 --> 00:16:41,345
There you go! Ha!
412
00:16:41,348 --> 00:16:43,174
That's how you do it!
413
00:16:43,176 --> 00:16:44,523
Is that your little girl?
414
00:16:44,525 --> 00:16:46,527
That's my little lady.
415
00:16:52,054 --> 00:16:53,747
Well, sometimes.
416
00:17:00,161 --> 00:17:03,189
Carrying the stuffing out of the
Caddy was easy. Using it to stop
417
00:17:03,192 --> 00:17:05,935
- the guys chasing us...
- The kids are asleep.
418
00:17:05,937 --> 00:17:07,589
MacGYVER: Gasoline would help.
419
00:17:07,591 --> 00:17:09,548
- Always does...
- You gonna watch that?
420
00:17:09,550 --> 00:17:10,984
Well, it's MacGyver.
421
00:17:10,986 --> 00:17:13,073
He makes stuff out of other stuff.
422
00:17:13,075 --> 00:17:14,814
MacGYVER: Sort of a homemade mortar.
423
00:17:14,816 --> 00:17:16,775
Why, did you want to
watch something else?
424
00:17:16,778 --> 00:17:20,039
I thought maybe we could watch a movie.
425
00:17:21,127 --> 00:17:23,170
Sure, yeah, which one?
426
00:17:23,172 --> 00:17:25,914
Um... I don't know.
427
00:17:27,002 --> 00:17:29,133
I heard that that movie Road House
428
00:17:29,135 --> 00:17:30,960
is supposed to be good.
429
00:17:30,962 --> 00:17:32,527
What's it about?
430
00:17:32,529 --> 00:17:34,834
I think it's about a guy,
431
00:17:34,836 --> 00:17:37,663
um... Dalton.
432
00:17:37,665 --> 00:17:39,614
Who's a bouncer
433
00:17:39,617 --> 00:17:41,356
who has to clean up a bar
434
00:17:41,359 --> 00:17:44,147
that's been overrun
by a bunch of bad guys.
435
00:17:44,150 --> 00:17:46,767
Oh, yeah, it's got that guy
that looks like Georgie in it.
436
00:17:46,770 --> 00:17:48,239
No, he doesn't.
437
00:17:48,241 --> 00:17:49,805
[laughs]: Are you kidding?
438
00:17:49,807 --> 00:17:51,459
He looks exactly like him.
439
00:17:51,461 --> 00:17:54,677
♪
440
00:17:57,902 --> 00:17:59,902
Let's just watch MacGyver.
441
00:17:59,904 --> 00:18:01,558
GEORGE SR.: Cool.
442
00:18:02,942 --> 00:18:09,216
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