1
00:00:02,236 --> 00:00:04,572
Previously on Young Sheldon...
We are at capacity.

2
00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:06,207
It's time to expand.

3
00:00:06,307 --> 00:00:08,008
Where?
The video store

4
00:00:08,109 --> 00:00:09,810
right behind that wall

5
00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:11,745
just lost its lease.

6
00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:13,081
So, you're telling me
there's nothing weird

7
00:00:13,181 --> 00:00:14,415
going on back there?

8
00:00:16,050 --> 00:00:17,351
Oh, my God.

9
00:00:17,451 --> 00:00:19,487
Is it legal?
No.
Yes.

10
00:00:19,587 --> 00:00:21,189
Too bad there's not
a comic book database

11
00:00:21,289 --> 00:00:23,224
so I can search through it
and find what I'm looking for.

12
00:00:23,324 --> 00:00:24,892
Well, CERN
has something similar.

13
00:00:24,992 --> 00:00:27,361
You can search a database
of scientific papers.

14
00:00:27,461 --> 00:00:29,363
But there's no database
for comic books.

15
00:00:29,463 --> 00:00:31,632
You should make one.
Somewhere else.

16
00:00:31,732 --> 00:00:33,501
Could it be used
to catalogue

17
00:00:33,601 --> 00:00:34,702
other things?

18
00:00:34,802 --> 00:00:36,570
Yes, the applications
are endless.

19
00:00:36,670 --> 00:00:38,806
Ooh, there could be ones
for scientific grants.

20
00:00:38,906 --> 00:00:40,941
Funding grants is such
a time-consuming process.

21
00:00:41,041 --> 00:00:42,576
If there was
a centralized database,

22
00:00:42,676 --> 00:00:44,345
it would change
the research landscape entirely.

23
00:00:44,445 --> 00:00:46,680
Do you see what this could do
for the scientific community?

24
00:00:46,780 --> 00:00:49,483
We could charge an access fee to
every university on the planet,

25
00:00:49,583 --> 00:00:51,985
then I could retire on a yacht
in the Bahamas.

26
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You're missing the point.

27
00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:54,222
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

28
00:00:54,322 --> 00:00:55,823
Uh, good for science. I love it.

29
00:00:58,692 --> 00:01:00,794
ADULT SHELDON: People say French
is the language of love,

30
00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:05,032
but for me, nothing is sweeter
than the exhilarating sounds

31
00:01:05,133 --> 00:01:07,201
of legalese. Ooh, la, la.

32
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The same could not be said
for my parents.

33
00:01:10,338 --> 00:01:11,272
Uh...

34
00:01:11,372 --> 00:01:12,340
(stammers)

35
00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:13,441
And which one are we?

36
00:01:13,541 --> 00:01:14,575
"The-the party
of the first part"

37
00:01:14,675 --> 00:01:16,009
or "the party
of the second part"?

38
00:01:16,110 --> 00:01:17,578
(laughs) The first part,

39
00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:19,413
but either way, it's a party.

40
00:01:19,513 --> 00:01:22,015
Speaking of which,
can I get you a beer?

41
00:01:22,116 --> 00:01:24,285
Y-You're a Lone Star man, right?

42
00:01:24,385 --> 00:01:25,886
Matter of fact, I am.
George.

43
00:01:25,986 --> 00:01:27,355
She offered.
I don't want to be rude.

44
00:01:27,455 --> 00:01:28,389
It's 11:00 a.m.

45
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Well, you just let me know.

46
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We'll get you anything you want.

47
00:01:32,059 --> 00:01:34,094
We're fine, thank you.
(clears throat)

48
00:01:34,195 --> 00:01:36,164
So, you really think
this invention of Sheldon's

49
00:01:36,264 --> 00:01:37,465
could be worth something?

50
00:01:37,565 --> 00:01:39,367
Oh, who knows?
Uh, most of the time,

51
00:01:39,467 --> 00:01:41,001
these things don't pan out.

52
00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:43,604
Could be something,
probably nothing. (laughs)

53
00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:46,140
Uh, that's just a formality.

54
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:48,476
But you said my grant database

55
00:01:48,576 --> 00:01:50,444
would make the university
"boatloads of money."

56
00:01:50,544 --> 00:01:52,446
Well, that doesn't
mean anything.

57
00:01:52,546 --> 00:01:54,182
Boats can be small. (laughs)

58
00:01:54,282 --> 00:01:55,649
Ever hear of a canoe?

59
00:01:55,749 --> 00:01:58,186
Anyway, who needs a pen?

60
00:01:58,286 --> 00:01:59,753
What's this about the university

61
00:01:59,853 --> 00:02:03,123
owning 90% and Sheldon
only owning ten?

62
00:02:03,224 --> 00:02:05,025
Oh, that's just
standard boilerplate.

63
00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:06,660
Did you know that
boilerplate originally

64
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:07,928
referred to the
roll of steel

65
00:02:08,028 --> 00:02:10,030
used as a template
to create steam boilers,

66
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,899
but then was adapted
to the legal profession

67
00:02:11,999 --> 00:02:13,634
to describe the way
companies use fine print

68
00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:15,068
to get around the law?

69
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:18,606
Ugh, that fact is just so fun.

70
00:02:18,706 --> 00:02:20,241
You see? It is a party.

71
00:02:20,341 --> 00:02:22,610
And what's a party
without Yoo-hoo?

72
00:02:22,710 --> 00:02:24,545
Can I get you a cold one?

73
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:25,879
Yes, please.

74
00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:27,715
No. We want to make
sure that Sheldon

75
00:02:27,815 --> 00:02:29,016
is being treated fairly.

76
00:02:29,116 --> 00:02:31,018
Yeah, maybe we should get
our own lawyer

77
00:02:31,118 --> 00:02:33,187
to take a look at this
before we sign anything.

78
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Can we afford a lawyer?

79
00:02:37,124 --> 00:02:39,893
Okay, w-we're gonna need
some time to get back to you.

80
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Of course.
You take all the time you need.

81
00:02:42,896 --> 00:02:44,498
You know, just
because of all

82
00:02:44,598 --> 00:02:47,768
the nice things we've done for
your son and for your family,

83
00:02:47,868 --> 00:02:50,938
no need to start
trusting us now.

84
00:02:51,038 --> 00:02:54,642
She took that
better than I thought.

85
00:02:54,742 --> 00:02:57,645
* Nobody else
is stronger than I am *

86
00:02:57,745 --> 00:03:00,281
* Yesterday I moved a mountain *

87
00:03:00,381 --> 00:03:02,650
* I bet I could be your hero *

88
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* I am a mighty little man *

89
00:03:05,819 --> 00:03:09,890
* I am a mighty little man. *

90
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Dang, it's busy in here
for a weekday.

91
00:03:17,565 --> 00:03:19,533
Social Security checks landed.

92
00:03:19,633 --> 00:03:22,270
Hm. Getting paid
just to be old-- must be nice.

93
00:03:22,370 --> 00:03:23,437
I ain't complaining.

94
00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:24,672
Listen, this cash box

95
00:03:24,772 --> 00:03:26,240
is full. Take some of this up

96
00:03:26,340 --> 00:03:28,942
and stick it in the register
in the video store.

97
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:29,977
You got it.

98
00:03:30,077 --> 00:03:31,412
And don't be
flirting with Mandy.

99
00:03:31,512 --> 00:03:32,680
I need help back here.

100
00:03:32,780 --> 00:03:34,548
Okay, but she might
flirt with me.

101
00:03:34,648 --> 00:03:36,917
This shirt really
brings out my eyes.

102
00:03:39,152 --> 00:03:40,454
(door closes)

103
00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:42,122
How's it going?
Figure everything out?

104
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People give me money,
I give them movies.

105
00:03:44,525 --> 00:03:45,759
I think I got it.

106
00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:47,761
Smart, pregnant,
you're the whole package.

107
00:03:47,861 --> 00:03:49,730
I'd like to return this movie.

108
00:03:49,830 --> 00:03:51,732
Okay, thank you. Come again.

109
00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:54,101
I can't believe
you would rent this filth.

110
00:03:54,201 --> 00:03:56,870
It's not filth.
It's Basic Instinct.

111
00:03:56,970 --> 00:03:58,439
Well, my husband was watching it

112
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and there was a woman in there
who showed her hoo-ha.

113
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Yeah, she does.

114
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Come on, I mean,
you don't see the whole thing.

115
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At most, you
see a "hoo."

116
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If you see the "hoo,"
the "ha's" right there.

117
00:04:08,682 --> 00:04:10,284
Whatever it was, it's sinful.

118
00:04:10,384 --> 00:04:12,420
Why don't you pick out
something else? On the house.

119
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I don't know why you'd carry
something like this.

120
00:04:14,822 --> 00:04:15,856
People like it.

121
00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:17,157
I've seen it three times.

122
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:18,992
Do you really want
to bring your baby

123
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:22,062
into a world where this
is considered entertainment?

124
00:04:23,964 --> 00:04:26,199
Lady, why don't you
let me worry about my baby

125
00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:28,636
and, uh, you worry about
what your husband's watching.

126
00:04:29,236 --> 00:04:31,372
Easy, she's still
a customer.

127
00:04:31,472 --> 00:04:32,640
Not anymore.

128
00:04:32,740 --> 00:04:34,074
And I'm gonna tell
my prayer group

129
00:04:34,174 --> 00:04:35,343
not to come here either.

130
00:04:35,443 --> 00:04:37,511
(scoffs) Okay, you do that.
We have family

131
00:04:37,611 --> 00:04:38,846
entertainment as well.

132
00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:41,114
Sound of Music.
No one shows nothing.

133
00:04:41,214 --> 00:04:43,517
Three times, really?

134
00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:45,085
I'm 17.

135
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:48,356
Well, I don't know,
you're the lawyer.

136
00:04:48,456 --> 00:04:50,491
You know,
if this invention's big,

137
00:04:50,591 --> 00:04:51,825
mama wants a taste.

138
00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:53,561
President Hagemeyer,
a word.

139
00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:55,396
Here's a word: out.

140
00:04:55,496 --> 00:04:56,764
I understand
you're moving forward

141
00:04:56,864 --> 00:04:58,432
with Sheldon's
grant database.

142
00:04:58,532 --> 00:04:59,900
I was an intrinsic
part of that.

143
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,802
Hm, Sheldon didn't mention you.

144
00:05:01,902 --> 00:05:04,638
Of course he didn't, that
pint-sized little credit hog.

145
00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,640
Do I need to redo
these contracts?

146
00:05:06,740 --> 00:05:08,909
You betcha.
All right, just hold on.

147
00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:10,277
This is good
for the university.

148
00:05:10,378 --> 00:05:11,879
This isn't about everybody

149
00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:13,547
getting a piece of the pie.

150
00:05:13,647 --> 00:05:16,584
Oh, really? In that contract,
does she get a piece of the pie?

151
00:05:16,684 --> 00:05:18,586
Uh...
Don't answer that,

152
00:05:18,686 --> 00:05:20,253
attorney-client whatever.

153
00:05:20,354 --> 00:05:23,023
Uh, technically my services
are paid for by the uni...

154
00:05:23,123 --> 00:05:24,558
Shut up, Ken.

155
00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:26,159
Linda, be reasonable.

156
00:05:26,259 --> 00:05:27,695
I am.

157
00:05:27,795 --> 00:05:30,230
After all the Sheldon I've
put up with, I deserve this.

158
00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:33,767
You deserve this? My office
is basically his clubhouse.

159
00:05:34,968 --> 00:05:36,269
Okay, I tell you what I'll do.

160
00:05:36,370 --> 00:05:38,806
If Sheldon's okay with it,

161
00:05:38,906 --> 00:05:40,708
you're welcome
to part of his cut.

162
00:05:40,808 --> 00:05:42,610
That's not you
doing anything.

163
00:05:45,245 --> 00:05:46,346
Hi there, Connie.

164
00:05:46,447 --> 00:05:48,516
Pastor Jeff.
What can I do for you?

165
00:05:48,616 --> 00:05:52,152
I was hoping we could chat
about your video store.

166
00:05:52,252 --> 00:05:53,153
What about it?

167
00:05:53,253 --> 00:05:55,088
I'm just so glad

168
00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:57,958
it's in the hands
of a good Christian woman.

169
00:05:58,058 --> 00:05:59,359
Where you headed here, padre?

170
00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:01,395
(clears throat)
Well, some of my flock

171
00:06:01,495 --> 00:06:03,697
have concerns about
the movies y'all rent.

172
00:06:03,797 --> 00:06:05,499
You know,
the ones with the

173
00:06:05,599 --> 00:06:07,334
sexual content

174
00:06:07,435 --> 00:06:08,902
and whatnot.

175
00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:11,004
If they don't want
to see whatnot,

176
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:12,973
then they shouldn't
rent whatnot.

177
00:06:13,073 --> 00:06:16,577
I hear you. God gave us
free will. (chuckles)

178
00:06:16,677 --> 00:06:18,378
But you're renting temptation.

179
00:06:18,479 --> 00:06:20,213
And you know who tempts us?

180
00:06:20,313 --> 00:06:21,649
The devil.

181
00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:23,717
So, that's who's making me

182
00:06:23,817 --> 00:06:25,252
want to slam this door
in your face.

183
00:06:25,352 --> 00:06:27,320
I'm just here
to give you a heads-up.

184
00:06:27,421 --> 00:06:28,722
People are upset

185
00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:31,759
and I'd hate to see
your business suffer.

186
00:06:32,660 --> 00:06:33,527
Are you threatening me?

187
00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:35,162
No, uh, I'm sorry.

188
00:06:35,262 --> 00:06:37,731
Uh, let me just
take off my pastor hat,

189
00:06:37,831 --> 00:06:39,667
put on my neighbor cap,

190
00:06:39,767 --> 00:06:41,134
and start again.

191
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:43,303
I'm gonna put on my hat, too.

192
00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:45,573
It's got a big foam finger
on top of it.

193
00:06:45,673 --> 00:06:47,107
Guess which one.

194
00:06:47,207 --> 00:06:48,275
The naughty one?

195
00:06:48,375 --> 00:06:49,977
Bingo.

196
00:06:51,178 --> 00:06:52,880
* *

197
00:06:52,980 --> 00:06:55,348
Mr. Vance, thank you for taking
the time to see us.

198
00:06:55,449 --> 00:06:56,884
Oh, no problem.
(chuckles)

199
00:06:56,984 --> 00:06:59,419
You know,
I don't ordinarily handle

200
00:06:59,520 --> 00:07:01,489
intellectual property contracts,

201
00:07:01,589 --> 00:07:03,491
I'm more of a slip-and-fall guy.

202
00:07:03,591 --> 00:07:06,359
I have seen your face
on those park bench ads.

203
00:07:06,460 --> 00:07:09,396
Oh, you fall in the park,
this is the first thing

204
00:07:09,497 --> 00:07:11,064
you see.

205
00:07:11,164 --> 00:07:12,833
So, as I said on the phone,

206
00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:16,036
our son invented something that
his university's interested in,

207
00:07:16,136 --> 00:07:18,639
but we feel they might be
trying to keep

208
00:07:18,739 --> 00:07:20,073
the lion's share for themselves.

209
00:07:20,173 --> 00:07:22,576
You really think
it's gonna be worth something?

210
00:07:22,676 --> 00:07:25,779
University seems to think so.
They want 90% of it.

211
00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:27,948
Oh, is that so?

212
00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:30,017
What's the invention?

213
00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:32,052
We don't really understand it.

214
00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:34,855
Oh, you know, it's a computer...

215
00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:36,289
thing.
(scoffs)

216
00:07:36,389 --> 00:07:38,992
Adding machine and carbon paper
got me this far.

217
00:07:39,092 --> 00:07:40,360
Mm.

218
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:41,562
What... what am I smelling?

219
00:07:41,662 --> 00:07:43,797
Beef and broccoli.

220
00:07:43,897 --> 00:07:45,465
Chinese place downstairs.

221
00:07:45,566 --> 00:07:47,835
Ooh, do they have good chop
suey? I can never find good...

222
00:07:47,935 --> 00:07:50,103
George.
You were saying?

223
00:07:52,506 --> 00:07:55,075
Sheldon, we need to talk.

224
00:07:55,175 --> 00:07:58,045
You should keep your voice down.
This is a library.

225
00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:02,382
Do you remember when
we came up with the idea

226
00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:03,817
for that grant database?

227
00:08:03,917 --> 00:08:05,686
I remember when
I came up with the idea.

228
00:08:05,786 --> 00:08:07,154
Uh, in my office.

229
00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:08,055
In my brain.

230
00:08:08,155 --> 00:08:10,223
Which was in my office.

231
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:11,692
And, as I recall,

232
00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:13,493
I was the one who suggested
you build a database.

233
00:08:13,594 --> 00:08:16,630
No, you suggested I build
a comic book database.

234
00:08:16,730 --> 00:08:19,567
Which was the underlying idea.

235
00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:22,235
Fire is the underlying idea
for the nuclear power plant,

236
00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:24,171
and no one credits the caveman.

237
00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:27,207
Son...

238
00:08:27,307 --> 00:08:29,943
and I call you son because
I think of you as family.

239
00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:32,846
Is this the way you would
treat your own family?

240
00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:36,016
Not my mom.
Everyone else is on their own.

241
00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:40,821
JEFF (in distance):
Thank you for saying no to sin!

242
00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:44,457
Oh, you got to be kidding me.

243
00:08:46,694 --> 00:08:47,995
What are you doing?

244
00:08:48,095 --> 00:08:49,997
We're just asking people
to sign our petition

245
00:08:50,097 --> 00:08:53,333
if they agree that sin
has no place in cinema.

246
00:08:53,433 --> 00:08:55,335
Huh. Clever.
Thanks.

247
00:08:55,435 --> 00:08:58,405
And God doesn't want us
seeing people's private parts.

248
00:08:58,505 --> 00:09:00,540
Didn't he make people's
private parts?

249
00:09:00,641 --> 00:09:04,011
He did, and then he made clothes
to cover 'em right up.

250
00:09:04,111 --> 00:09:06,747
(sighs) You are scaring
away my customers.

251
00:09:06,847 --> 00:09:08,548
You know what's scarier? Hell.

252
00:09:08,649 --> 00:09:11,619
Look, you can't just sit here
in front of my store.

253
00:09:11,719 --> 00:09:13,587
Freedom of speech.
we're allowed.

254
00:09:13,687 --> 00:09:15,656
And we're allowed
to rent whatever movies we want.

255
00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:17,024
People can choose
for themselves.

256
00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:18,558
They sure can.

257
00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:21,829
If you love God
and hate the devil, sign here.

258
00:09:21,929 --> 00:09:25,498
Where is your halo? 'Cause
you are an angel. (chuckles)

259
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,837
Let's just see what
the people think about this.

260
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:35,442
Yeah.

261
00:09:41,849 --> 00:09:43,116
MEEMAW:
What are you doing? We just

262
00:09:43,216 --> 00:09:44,584
finally got those
killjoys out of here.

263
00:09:44,685 --> 00:09:45,853
Yeah, it was amazing.

264
00:09:45,953 --> 00:09:47,621
Have you two lost your minds?

265
00:09:47,721 --> 00:09:49,222
We do not need
this kind of attention.

266
00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:50,991
Attention's good.

267
00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:52,726
Like, free advertising.

268
00:09:52,826 --> 00:09:54,762
We're running an illegal
gambling room in the back.

269
00:09:54,862 --> 00:09:56,630
Oh, that'll be fine.
For you.

270
00:09:56,730 --> 00:09:58,732
If we get arrested,
y'all go to lady jail.

271
00:09:58,832 --> 00:10:01,468
I have to go to scary jail.
I'm too pretty for scary jail.

272
00:10:01,568 --> 00:10:02,903
No more prison movies for you.

273
00:10:03,003 --> 00:10:05,538
So you're saying
we should just give in,

274
00:10:05,639 --> 00:10:08,308
after what that
holy-rolling Muppet

275
00:10:08,408 --> 00:10:10,477
has done to your whole family?

276
00:10:10,577 --> 00:10:12,479
He does look like a Muppet.

277
00:10:12,579 --> 00:10:14,081
All I'm saying is
we need to remember

278
00:10:14,181 --> 00:10:15,816
where the real money's
coming from.

279
00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:18,786
If we want it to keep coming,
you got to back off.

280
00:10:20,187 --> 00:10:23,523
Okay, fine. I'll behave.

281
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:26,626
When did you start
to be the responsible one?

282
00:10:26,727 --> 00:10:29,096
Hey, I don't like it, either.

283
00:10:30,430 --> 00:10:33,967
Ah, just the young genius
I was hoping to see.

284
00:10:34,768 --> 00:10:37,104
Look, I've heard
from your parents' lawyer,

285
00:10:37,204 --> 00:10:39,539
and I'm a little concerned

286
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:41,909
that this whole thing
is getting out of hand.

287
00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:44,177
How so?
Well, you know,
lawyers get involved

288
00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:47,514
and everything slows down
and, well, I'm just worried

289
00:10:47,614 --> 00:10:49,516
that someone else might come up

290
00:10:49,616 --> 00:10:51,318
with the same idea
in the meantime.

291
00:10:51,418 --> 00:10:53,553
I didn't think of that.
We should get started.

292
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:55,689
I agree, but, well,
we can't get started

293
00:10:55,789 --> 00:10:57,524
until the paperwork is signed.

294
00:10:57,624 --> 00:10:59,659
Ugh! Those darn lawyers.

295
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,294
Well, how can we fix this?

296
00:11:01,394 --> 00:11:05,198
Hmm. Well, I guess

297
00:11:05,298 --> 00:11:09,169
if you could, well,
convince your parents to sign,

298
00:11:09,269 --> 00:11:10,871
then we could get rolling.

299
00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:15,042
And to make it worth your while,

300
00:11:15,142 --> 00:11:18,812
how about we put your name
on one of these buildings?

301
00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:22,249
How would you feel about
"Sheldon Cooper Science Center"?

302
00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:24,718
I'm sorry. Did you say,
"Sheldon Cooper Science Center,"

303
00:11:24,818 --> 00:11:27,054
or "Sheldon Cooper's
Science Center"?

304
00:11:27,154 --> 00:11:28,188
Well, which do you like?

305
00:11:28,288 --> 00:11:29,322
I prefer the possessive.

306
00:11:29,422 --> 00:11:30,758
It makes it much more mine.

307
00:11:30,858 --> 00:11:33,560
Then "Sheldon Cooper's
Science Center" it is.

308
00:11:33,660 --> 00:11:36,196
(laughs)
So, do we have a deal?

309
00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:37,965
Okay.
Excellent.

310
00:11:38,065 --> 00:11:41,601
Now get out of here
before I pinch those cheeks.

311
00:11:43,303 --> 00:11:44,371
(sighs)

312
00:11:44,471 --> 00:11:46,039
(knocking)

313
00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,976
I will remind you
my wife is a police officer.

314
00:11:49,076 --> 00:11:51,812
I've just come
with a little peace offering.

315
00:11:52,980 --> 00:11:57,017
My last copy of Basic Instinct.

316
00:11:57,117 --> 00:12:01,221
So there you go.
No more naked ladies,

317
00:12:01,321 --> 00:12:02,455
no more Michael Douglas'

318
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:05,658
bare butt giving me
impure thoughts.

319
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,862
The town is safe again.

320
00:12:08,962 --> 00:12:11,264
Well, thank you
for seeing reason.

321
00:12:11,364 --> 00:12:14,201
Well, what kind of good
Christian woman would I be

322
00:12:14,301 --> 00:12:15,468
if I didn't?

323
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:17,805
(chuckles)
So, we square?

324
00:12:17,905 --> 00:12:20,673
It's not about you and me
being square, Connie.

325
00:12:20,774 --> 00:12:24,511
It's about you
and El Jefe Grande.

326
00:12:24,611 --> 00:12:27,514
Mm-hmm.

327
00:12:27,614 --> 00:12:30,017
Well, goodbye.

328
00:12:30,117 --> 00:12:32,319
You know,
I'd be happy to come down

329
00:12:32,419 --> 00:12:34,287
and let you know what
other movies are objectionable

330
00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:37,224
so we don't have
another situation on our hands.

331
00:12:37,324 --> 00:12:41,028
You want to take
more movies out of my store?

332
00:12:41,128 --> 00:12:43,630
Again, not me,
but there's a guy with a thumb

333
00:12:43,730 --> 00:12:46,066
a lot bigger
than Siskel or Ebert's.

334
00:12:50,270 --> 00:12:52,172
Sheldon, thank you
for coming in.

335
00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:55,275
I want to apologize
for our little tiff earlier.

336
00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:56,376
You're forgiven.

337
00:12:56,476 --> 00:12:57,911
Oh. Great.

338
00:12:58,011 --> 00:13:02,315
I found something that might
be of interest to you.

339
00:13:02,415 --> 00:13:05,518
An authentic signature
from Richard Feynman.

340
00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:06,786
Where did you get this?

341
00:13:06,887 --> 00:13:08,121
Details aren't important.

342
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:10,490
Is this a restraining order?
Not important.

343
00:13:10,590 --> 00:13:12,059
That's actually a really
good way to get autographs.

344
00:13:12,159 --> 00:13:13,760
I'll have to keep that in mind.

345
00:13:13,861 --> 00:13:15,963
Well, it's yours, from
one scientist to another,

346
00:13:16,063 --> 00:13:17,430
and that's my point, really.

347
00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:20,333
You and I-- we need
to stick together.
Why?

348
00:13:20,433 --> 00:13:22,802
Because this university
is filled with people

349
00:13:22,903 --> 00:13:24,671
who want to exploit our ideas.

350
00:13:24,771 --> 00:13:26,206
That's not my experience.

351
00:13:26,306 --> 00:13:28,141
President Hagemeyer
just offered me my own building.

352
00:13:28,241 --> 00:13:30,210
You're being manipulated,
you don't even know it.

353
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:32,412
Sheldon, I've seen this
a thousand times--

354
00:13:32,512 --> 00:13:36,283
a brilliant young mind
like yours taken advantage of.

355
00:13:36,383 --> 00:13:38,085
But isn't that
what you're trying to do?

356
00:13:38,185 --> 00:13:39,920
Absolutely not.

357
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:41,821
President Hagemeyer's
was a bribe.

358
00:13:41,922 --> 00:13:45,825
That is a gift
from one peer to another.

359
00:13:45,926 --> 00:13:47,895
(laughs)
So what do you say?

360
00:13:47,995 --> 00:13:49,629
Are you a scientist

361
00:13:49,729 --> 00:13:51,464
or are you a pawn
of the administration?

362
00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:52,732
A scientist.

363
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:54,567
Yes, you are. (laughs)

364
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:56,369
So, we have a deal?

365
00:13:56,469 --> 00:13:59,006
Okay.

366
00:13:59,106 --> 00:14:00,707
MEEMAW:
I'd like to order

367
00:14:00,807 --> 00:14:03,010
five more copies
of Basic Instinct

368
00:14:03,110 --> 00:14:07,014
and a couple more
of Fatal Attraction.

369
00:14:07,114 --> 00:14:10,650
Anything else?
Ooh, uh, get a
Last Temptation of Christ.

370
00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:12,152
That'll really
piss people off.

371
00:14:12,252 --> 00:14:15,322
And a copy of
The Last Temptation of Christ

372
00:14:15,422 --> 00:14:16,723
to really piss people off.

373
00:14:16,823 --> 00:14:18,625
Thank you.

374
00:14:18,725 --> 00:14:20,293
What are y'all doing?

375
00:14:20,393 --> 00:14:22,729
Well, I tried to be nice
but he kept pushing.

376
00:14:22,829 --> 00:14:24,264
Yeah, so now we're pushing back.

377
00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:25,598
Why do you care?

378
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:27,000
Because I don't like
anybody telling me how

379
00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:28,902
to run my business,
especially him.

380
00:14:29,002 --> 00:14:31,038
This is not your business.

381
00:14:31,138 --> 00:14:33,240
That room back there
with the shady piles of money--

382
00:14:33,340 --> 00:14:36,776
that's your business.
Your secret, illegal business.

383
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:38,645
So, what, are we just supposed

384
00:14:38,745 --> 00:14:40,747
to become
a Christian video store now?

385
00:14:40,847 --> 00:14:42,782
You know what?
In this town, I...

386
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:45,485
No! I am not
gonna let that man win.

387
00:14:45,585 --> 00:14:47,754
Hi. I'm with Channel 7 news.

388
00:14:47,854 --> 00:14:49,356
Can I help you?

389
00:14:49,456 --> 00:14:52,592
A local pastor has put together
a petition of citizens

390
00:14:52,692 --> 00:14:55,762
concerned about the vulgar
content of your video store.

391
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:57,164
Would you care to comment?

392
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:59,766
Damn straight I would.
I want him to know...

393
00:14:59,866 --> 00:15:01,834
Give me. Give me.
No, give me that. I want...

394
00:15:03,070 --> 00:15:04,771
I can assure you
there's nothing immoral

395
00:15:04,871 --> 00:15:06,940
or indecent going on here.

396
00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:14,214
Mm. So, we were talking
to the lawyer...

397
00:15:14,314 --> 00:15:16,049
Here comes the divorce.

398
00:15:16,149 --> 00:15:17,584
We are not getting divorced.

399
00:15:17,684 --> 00:15:18,918
Then why do we have a lawyer?

400
00:15:19,019 --> 00:15:20,220
Sheldon invented something

401
00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:21,488
that the university's
interested in

402
00:15:21,588 --> 00:15:23,323
and it could be
worth some money.

403
00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:25,092
You always were
my favorite brother.

404
00:15:25,192 --> 00:15:27,327
This morning you licked your
finger and put it in my ear.

405
00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:28,761
That means I like you.

406
00:15:28,861 --> 00:15:30,663
Anyway, the lawyer
wants to sit down with you

407
00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:32,699
before he gets into it
with the university.

408
00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:35,168
I don't know. I hear
lawyers slow things down.

409
00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:36,303
What?

410
00:15:36,403 --> 00:15:37,971
Shelly, this is for your future.

411
00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:41,374
We're just trying to make sure
that you're taken care of.

412
00:15:41,474 --> 00:15:43,010
I don't care about money.

413
00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:46,179
Well, someday you might when
you have your own wife and kids.

414
00:15:46,279 --> 00:15:47,780
I don't see that happening.

415
00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:50,583
No one sees that happening.
And I say that with love.

416
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:52,652
Sheldon, this is important
to all of us.

417
00:15:52,752 --> 00:15:54,988
Uh, you got to think
about your family.

418
00:15:55,088 --> 00:15:56,723
Shelly, he's right.

419
00:15:56,823 --> 00:16:00,193
Did you put extra hot dogs
in this spaghetti?

420
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:01,961
I did.

421
00:16:02,929 --> 00:16:05,832
Okay, I'll talk with the lawyer.

422
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:08,835
(whispering):
You're good.

423
00:16:10,403 --> 00:16:12,939
Well, I'm-I'm so glad that
we can all sit down together.

424
00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:16,809
And I have a feeling we are
gonna come to a quick agreement.

425
00:16:17,644 --> 00:16:20,380
I have a feeling we are.

426
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:21,881
So, I have redrawn
the contracts...

427
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,516
Sorry we're late.

428
00:16:23,616 --> 00:16:25,785
What are you doing here?
And who's he?

429
00:16:25,885 --> 00:16:27,487
I'm his cousin.
And lawyer.

430
00:16:27,587 --> 00:16:29,222
Really, Grant?

431
00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:31,224
Yeah, really.
Let me talk for you.

432
00:16:31,324 --> 00:16:32,525
Yeah, really.

433
00:16:32,625 --> 00:16:35,362
Okay. Fine, fine. Stay.

434
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,198
It really doesn't make
any difference because

435
00:16:38,298 --> 00:16:41,968
Sheldon agrees that this is in
the best interest of everyone.

436
00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:44,304
You said that?
Yes.

437
00:16:44,404 --> 00:16:46,973
Hold on. Sheldon told me...
Grant.

438
00:16:48,608 --> 00:16:49,776
Sheldon informed my client

439
00:16:49,876 --> 00:16:52,011
that their interests
were aligned.

440
00:16:52,112 --> 00:16:54,147
You told him that?
Yes.

441
00:16:54,247 --> 00:16:55,248
You told me

442
00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:56,249
he was on our side.

443
00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:57,984
Didn't you tell them that?

444
00:16:58,085 --> 00:16:58,985
Yes.

445
00:16:59,086 --> 00:17:00,587
Which is it, Sheldon?

446
00:17:00,687 --> 00:17:03,856
Yeah, Sheldon.
Whose side are you on?

447
00:17:03,956 --> 00:17:05,692
Shelly?

448
00:17:06,493 --> 00:17:09,262
I don't know and I don't care.

449
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:10,663
I just want
to build the database.

450
00:17:10,763 --> 00:17:13,300
Why can't this just
be about the science?

451
00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:15,835
W-Why are you making it
all about the money?

452
00:17:16,636 --> 00:17:19,339
This was supposed to be
exciting, and you're ruining it.

453
00:17:21,741 --> 00:17:23,843
Oh...

454
00:17:23,943 --> 00:17:26,813
I'm telling you,
I can do it on my own.

455
00:17:26,913 --> 00:17:28,248
Shelly?

456
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:31,284
I don't want to be
in the middle anymore.

457
00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:34,321
I know. I...
I came out to apologize.

458
00:17:34,421 --> 00:17:35,855
We made that all about us

459
00:17:35,955 --> 00:17:37,890
and it should be
about what you want.

460
00:17:37,990 --> 00:17:39,592
Thanks.

461
00:17:39,692 --> 00:17:43,563
So... why don't you take
a little time

462
00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:46,032
and figure out
what's gonna make you happy?

463
00:17:46,133 --> 00:17:47,300
I will.

464
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:48,668
Okay, I did.

465
00:17:48,768 --> 00:17:52,004
Oh. All right.
Well, what did you decide?

466
00:17:52,105 --> 00:17:54,841
I'm cutting everybody out
and doing this myself.
What?

467
00:17:54,941 --> 00:17:57,377
I don't need the university
and I don't need Dr. Linkletter.

468
00:17:57,477 --> 00:17:59,312
How are you gonna
pay for all this?

469
00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:00,813
I'll find private investors.

470
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,749
They can pay for it
on the condition I'm left alone.

471
00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:06,052
Are you sure you don't want to
think about this a little more?

472
00:18:06,153 --> 00:18:07,554
Perhaps you're right.

473
00:18:07,654 --> 00:18:09,989
Done. I'm good.
Where you going?

474
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:12,325
My dorm. I have some calls
to make. Love you.

475
00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:14,627
Love you, too.

476
00:18:25,872 --> 00:18:27,507
Don't you have Die Hard?

477
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:29,742
Not anymore.
Why?

478
00:18:29,842 --> 00:18:32,011
It had that bad word in it.

479
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:36,349
What?
"Yippee-ki-yay," etcetera.

480
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,352
This store sucks.

481
00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:40,687
We know.

482
00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:43,190
Maybe you'd like
The Singing Nun.
Nope.

483
00:18:44,491 --> 00:18:48,094
Has anybody ever rented
The Singing Nun?

484
00:18:50,597 --> 00:18:52,031
Just Pastor Jeff.

485
00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:53,633
That figures.

486
00:18:53,733 --> 00:18:55,101
Wait a minute.

487
00:18:55,202 --> 00:18:57,437
You can see all the movies

488
00:18:57,537 --> 00:18:59,839
that Pastor Jeff ever rented?
You can see

489
00:18:59,939 --> 00:19:01,641
any movie everyone's rented.

490
00:19:01,741 --> 00:19:03,243
Well, let's just see

491
00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:06,078
if he's as pious
as he pretends to be.

492
00:19:06,179 --> 00:19:09,682
Let's find out. (grunts)

493
00:19:09,782 --> 00:19:10,783
(typing)

494
00:19:10,883 --> 00:19:13,152
Jesus Christ Superstar,

495
00:19:13,253 --> 00:19:15,755
Jesus of Nazareth,

496
00:19:15,855 --> 00:19:17,023
The Blood of Jesus.

497
00:19:17,123 --> 00:19:18,358
Good Lord.

498
00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:19,992
How many Jesus movies are there?

499
00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:21,661
Oh, what about his wife?

500
00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:24,163
Oh.
Mm.

501
00:19:24,264 --> 00:19:27,267
Show me, show me.
Mm.

502
00:19:29,636 --> 00:19:30,703
Hello, Pastor Jeff.

503
00:19:30,803 --> 00:19:32,071
(door closes)
Hey there, Connie.

504
00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:33,606
What brings you by?

505
00:19:33,706 --> 00:19:37,844
I just wanted to drop off
a little gift.

506
00:19:37,944 --> 00:19:39,479
Dirty Dancing?

507
00:19:39,579 --> 00:19:41,848
I think you know
how I feel about this movie.

508
00:19:41,948 --> 00:19:43,750
I do.

509
00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:46,486
I also know how your wife
feels about it.

510
00:19:46,586 --> 00:19:47,720
What?

511
00:19:47,820 --> 00:19:49,222
She's rented it five times.

512
00:19:49,322 --> 00:19:52,091
That's a lot
of shirtless Patrick Swayze.

513
00:19:52,191 --> 00:19:53,926
Must be some mistake.

514
00:19:54,026 --> 00:19:56,963
There isn't. Shall we talk about
Fatal Attraction?

515
00:19:57,063 --> 00:19:59,098
Do we have to?
Six times.

516
00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:01,968
Are you blackmailing me?
Yeah.

517
00:20:02,068 --> 00:20:03,403
Well, it's not gonna work.

518
00:20:03,503 --> 00:20:05,705
I'm a man of principles
and I stand by them.

519
00:20:05,805 --> 00:20:07,674
And I respect that.

520
00:20:08,808 --> 00:20:11,778
So let's talk about what your
church elders are renting.

521
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:13,780
Oh, come on.
Want to know?

522
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:14,981
Is it bad?

523
00:20:15,081 --> 00:20:18,050
It's Porky's bad.
(whimpers)

524
00:20:18,150 --> 00:20:19,986
How your principles feeling now?

525
00:20:20,753 --> 00:20:22,455
ADULT SHELDON:
I'm going to end this story

526
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,957
so you don't have to see
a grown man beg for mercy.

527
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:26,659
Connie, please...

528
00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:35,468
Captioning sponsored by
CBS

529
00:20:35,568 --> 00:20:38,471
WARNER BROS. TELEVISION

530
00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:41,274
and TOYOTA.

531
00:20:41,374 --> 00:20:44,811
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org