1
00:00:06,807 --> 00:00:08,072
[ laughter ]
2
00:00:08,074 --> 00:00:09,541
[ murr screaming ]
3
00:00:09,543 --> 00:00:10,943
[ laughter ]
4
00:00:10,945 --> 00:00:11,977
[ screaming ]
5
00:00:13,213 --> 00:00:14,546
Let's just get this started.
6
00:00:14,548 --> 00:00:16,414
Are you [bleep]
kidding me?
7
00:00:16,416 --> 00:00:17,682
Who's a good cat?
8
00:00:17,684 --> 00:00:18,650
[ laughter ]
9
00:00:20,154 --> 00:00:23,488
[ cymbals crash ]
10
00:00:23,490 --> 00:00:25,624
[ laughter ]
11
00:00:25,626 --> 00:00:28,426
Narrator: With special guest,
alf.
12
00:00:28,428 --> 00:00:30,429
The best is yet to come.
13
00:00:30,431 --> 00:00:32,297
[ laughter ]
14
00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:35,834
Today, we're attempting
to give away tickets to events
15
00:00:35,836 --> 00:00:37,235
That we can no longer attend.
16
00:00:37,237 --> 00:00:39,638
But these events will be
completely terrible,
17
00:00:39,640 --> 00:00:40,973
As they've been made up
by the other guys.
18
00:00:40,975 --> 00:00:42,975
The goal is to get someone
to attend the event,
19
00:00:42,977 --> 00:00:44,709
No matter how horrible
it sounds.
20
00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:48,580
And if you can't get someone
to take these tickets, you lose.
21
00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:50,449
"impractical jokers:
The movie"?
22
00:00:50,451 --> 00:00:52,151
Ha.
[ blows raspberry ]
23
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,724
Murr: Alright, q,
we're back on the streets.
Yes.
24
00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:02,594
You have got some hot tickets
in that envelope, my friend.
25
00:01:02,596 --> 00:01:05,864
I did notice a gleam
in the two of yours eye today
26
00:01:05,866 --> 00:01:07,866
As I was getting
my packet of tickets.
27
00:01:07,868 --> 00:01:11,870
That gleam's from just when sal
and I look at each other.
28
00:01:11,872 --> 00:01:14,139
When did that start?
About 10 minutes ago.
29
00:01:14,141 --> 00:01:15,674
[ both laugh ]
30
00:01:15,676 --> 00:01:17,209
Here we go.
31
00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:18,877
Hey, stache,
32
00:01:18,879 --> 00:01:20,412
My wife can't go to --
stache.
33
00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:22,080
[ murr laughs ]
stache?
34
00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:25,483
Your opening line was,
"stache, my wife can't go."
35
00:01:25,485 --> 00:01:28,153
What does that mean?
What does it mean?
36
00:01:28,155 --> 00:01:29,488
We've made no progress.
37
00:01:29,490 --> 00:01:31,823
This show started with you
calling somebody "mustache."
38
00:01:31,825 --> 00:01:33,825
[ laughs ]
39
00:01:33,827 --> 00:01:35,227
Sorry, mustache.
40
00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:36,761
Don't call me mustache.
41
00:01:36,763 --> 00:01:38,697
Alright, mustache. Don't call me
clown. That's all I'm saying.
42
00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:39,832
It's still all I got.
43
00:01:39,834 --> 00:01:42,567
12 years later,
you're still doing it.
44
00:01:42,569 --> 00:01:44,436
Who's this guy?
45
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:46,505
-Hey.
-There you go, q.
46
00:01:46,507 --> 00:01:47,972
Oh.
Hey, you know what?
47
00:01:47,974 --> 00:01:49,441
My buddy doug
just canceled on me.
48
00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:50,843
We had tickets
to something tonight,
49
00:01:50,845 --> 00:01:52,244
And I'm just going to
give them away completely free.
50
00:01:52,246 --> 00:01:53,846
You want it?
51
00:01:53,848 --> 00:01:56,715
It's
"exhume america presents
52
00:01:56,717 --> 00:01:58,316
Let's exhume
fred astaire."
53
00:01:58,318 --> 00:02:00,452
[ sal and murr laugh ]
54
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:03,255
Have you heard about
exhume america yet?
55
00:02:03,257 --> 00:02:04,723
No.
You didn't hear?
56
00:02:04,725 --> 00:02:07,526
They dug up marilyn monroe.
They exhumed her on stage.
57
00:02:07,528 --> 00:02:08,861
So tonight's
fred astaire's turn.
58
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:12,597
No, I live right here.
I live right up here.
59
00:02:12,599 --> 00:02:13,999
I'm here all the time.
60
00:02:15,936 --> 00:02:19,003
[ both laugh ]
61
00:02:19,005 --> 00:02:20,873
Sal: You're living in
the big six accounting firm?
62
00:02:20,875 --> 00:02:23,541
No, no, no, the building
right -- not in that --
63
00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:25,209
Wow, you really know
this town, huh?
64
00:02:25,211 --> 00:02:26,678
[ both laugh ]
65
00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:28,080
You sure you don't
want the tickets?
66
00:02:29,083 --> 00:02:30,282
No.
67
00:02:30,284 --> 00:02:33,618
[ both laugh ]
68
00:02:33,620 --> 00:02:36,288
He busted your lies.
69
00:02:36,290 --> 00:02:37,622
Excuse me.
70
00:02:37,624 --> 00:02:38,891
My friend just
canceled on me.
71
00:02:38,893 --> 00:02:40,558
I got two tickets to something.
I'm just giving them away.
72
00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:42,227
I don't even want
money or anything.
73
00:02:42,229 --> 00:02:46,298
Uh, the funeral of
monsignor francis j. Harris.
74
00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:48,433
[ laughs ]
75
00:02:48,435 --> 00:02:52,771
Tonight at saint mary's church.
No? No, can't make it tonight?
76
00:02:52,773 --> 00:02:55,240
It's a hot ticket, though.
It's three nights.
77
00:02:57,043 --> 00:02:59,844
Oh, well, the body probably
won't keep that long.
78
00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:02,447
[ sal and murr laughing ]
79
00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:05,317
Terrible attempt.
All fails for q.
80
00:03:05,319 --> 00:03:08,386
How have I gotten no better at
this in a decade-plus?
81
00:03:08,388 --> 00:03:10,722
[ buzzer ]
82
00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:13,458
Alright, sal's got
some hot tickets in his hand.
83
00:03:13,460 --> 00:03:15,259
Here we go.
84
00:03:15,261 --> 00:03:18,530
Hey. Yeah, I can't use them.
I will see. Hold on.
85
00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:20,599
Hey, do you guys
want free tickets to a show?
86
00:03:20,601 --> 00:03:22,134
I can't use them.
I'm just going to give 'em away.
87
00:03:22,136 --> 00:03:24,136
Can I call you back?
Okay.
88
00:03:24,138 --> 00:03:25,470
Nice. Believable.
89
00:03:25,472 --> 00:03:27,739
My girlfriend
can't make it.
90
00:03:27,741 --> 00:03:29,474
Yeah, tonight,
like, three blocks over.
91
00:03:29,476 --> 00:03:33,011
"tyler perry presents
katy perry and matthew perry,
92
00:03:33,013 --> 00:03:34,746
Starring steve perry
and joe perry."
93
00:03:34,748 --> 00:03:37,015
[ both laugh ]
94
00:03:37,017 --> 00:03:38,817
All the perrys
under one roof.
95
00:03:38,819 --> 00:03:40,885
It's tyler perry
and katy perry?
96
00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:42,554
No, "tyler perry presents
katy perry
97
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:45,089
And matthew perry starring
steve perry and joe perry."
98
00:03:45,091 --> 00:03:46,624
That's a lot of perrys.
Yeah.
99
00:03:46,626 --> 00:03:47,625
Is this a prank?
100
00:03:47,627 --> 00:03:48,627
Yeah, it is.
Yeah.
101
00:03:48,629 --> 00:03:51,763
[ both laugh ]
102
00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:53,165
Excuse me, guys.
You want free tickets
103
00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:55,033
To a show I can't go
to tonight?
104
00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:56,635
I got two tickets.
I just want to give them away.
105
00:03:57,904 --> 00:03:59,972
Q: Here we go.
106
00:03:59,974 --> 00:04:02,174
"gacy:
Just the clown stuff."
107
00:04:02,176 --> 00:04:03,708
Have you heard --
oh, god.
108
00:04:03,710 --> 00:04:07,045
It's going to be --
[ both laugh ]
109
00:04:07,047 --> 00:04:08,980
Have you heard of it?
The doc?
110
00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:12,250
No, I haven't heard.
I've heard of gacy.
111
00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:13,986
This is the doc about him,
but it's not the murderings.
112
00:04:13,988 --> 00:04:16,120
It's just the clown stuff.
So it's light.
113
00:04:16,122 --> 00:04:18,323
It's light.
It's, like, rated pg-13.
114
00:04:18,325 --> 00:04:20,525
A lot of people don't know
he was a really great clown.
115
00:04:20,527 --> 00:04:21,726
For years, he was a clown,
116
00:04:21,728 --> 00:04:23,395
And his sleight of hand
is unmatched.
117
00:04:23,397 --> 00:04:24,929
Hella balloon animals
he makes, too.
118
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,332
[ both laugh ]
119
00:04:27,334 --> 00:04:29,201
It's tonight
if you want to go.
No.
120
00:04:29,203 --> 00:04:31,069
-Oh.
-Oh.
121
00:04:31,071 --> 00:04:34,272
All that and nothing, sal.
I thought you had him.
122
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:35,740
Would you like tickets
to a show tonight?
123
00:04:35,742 --> 00:04:37,342
I'm giving them away.
I can't make it.
124
00:04:37,344 --> 00:04:40,945
So it's "lil jon presents
turn down for when?"
125
00:04:40,947 --> 00:04:42,080
[ q and murr laugh ]
126
00:04:42,082 --> 00:04:44,616
Lil jon
plays a time traveler.
127
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,084
Okay.
128
00:04:46,086 --> 00:04:47,619
[ both laugh ]
129
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:49,087
It's
"turn down for when?"
130
00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:50,889
"turn down for how"
is next spring.
131
00:04:50,891 --> 00:04:52,224
Why can't you go
anymore?
132
00:04:52,226 --> 00:04:54,158
'cause my girlfriend
has to stay late at work.
133
00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:55,693
Really?
Yeah.
134
00:04:55,695 --> 00:04:58,096
I'd be like, "girl,
just get off of work."
135
00:04:58,098 --> 00:04:59,363
She's a piece of shit,
but it's alright.
136
00:04:59,365 --> 00:05:01,766
[ laughs ]
137
00:05:01,768 --> 00:05:03,768
Thanks. I appreciate it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
138
00:05:03,770 --> 00:05:05,837
Get crunk tonight, though.
You got to do it.
I will.
139
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:06,905
Murr: She got it.
140
00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:09,041
Till the sweat drops
down your balls. Okay?
141
00:05:09,043 --> 00:05:11,109
[ q and murr laughing ]
142
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,579
-What?
-Here we go.
143
00:05:14,581 --> 00:05:15,780
Your flight's canceled?
144
00:05:15,782 --> 00:05:17,649
But we got
these tickets for tonight, babe.
145
00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:19,183
Q: Alright, go ahead, murr.
146
00:05:19,185 --> 00:05:21,119
Alright. I love you.
Bye.
147
00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:23,988
Buddy, can I ask you a question?
My wife just canceled on me.
148
00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:25,257
We're going to see
a show tonight.
149
00:05:25,259 --> 00:05:27,125
Do you want tickets?
It's free. Take them.
150
00:05:27,127 --> 00:05:28,793
It's a great show.
151
00:05:28,795 --> 00:05:30,528
It's "murr live!"?
152
00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:32,997
[ both laugh ]
153
00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:35,199
Q: Your own show.
154
00:05:35,201 --> 00:05:37,001
Do you know what
"murr live!" is?
No, I don't.
155
00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:38,070
You don't know who murr is?
156
00:05:38,072 --> 00:05:39,471
He's like a really
famous comedian.
157
00:05:39,473 --> 00:05:41,606
He's very, very funny.
Bald.
158
00:05:41,608 --> 00:05:44,342
[ both laugh ]
159
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:46,478
You don't know murr?
160
00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:50,014
Alright.
[ both laugh ]
161
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,950
Sal:
Murr, walk up to that lady
that's scratching her back
162
00:05:51,952 --> 00:05:53,952
And go, "excuse me, I noticed
you was scratching your back
163
00:05:53,954 --> 00:05:55,153
With the puerto rican flag.
164
00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:56,621
Would you like
free tickets tonight?"
165
00:05:56,623 --> 00:05:57,889
[ q laughs ]
166
00:05:57,891 --> 00:05:59,491
Excuse me.
I noticed you're scratching
167
00:05:59,493 --> 00:06:01,225
Your back
with the puerto rican day flag.
168
00:06:01,227 --> 00:06:03,295
[ sal and q laugh ]
169
00:06:03,297 --> 00:06:05,163
Puerto rican day flag?
170
00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:06,298
Would you like these
free tickets to a show?
171
00:06:06,300 --> 00:06:08,366
My wife can't make it.
For what?
172
00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:11,035
The name of it is
"void, void, void, void.
173
00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:12,837
Sample ticket.
Do not sell.
174
00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:14,506
Void, void, void, void."
175
00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:16,308
You're going to love it.
176
00:06:16,310 --> 00:06:17,842
You're not going to make it?
No.
177
00:06:17,844 --> 00:06:19,377
[ both laugh ]
178
00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:20,912
I mean, it's free.
I know, I know.
179
00:06:20,914 --> 00:06:22,180
Take them.
They're going to have
180
00:06:22,182 --> 00:06:24,983
Free spaghetti dinner
here also.
181
00:06:24,985 --> 00:06:27,251
Free spaghetti dinner?
Yeah.
182
00:06:27,253 --> 00:06:29,521
I don't know
if I can compete with that.
183
00:06:29,523 --> 00:06:32,124
Murr, murr, slap your arm
and go, "ah, I just got bit."
184
00:06:32,126 --> 00:06:34,126
Ah! I just got bit.
185
00:06:34,128 --> 00:06:35,727
Can you get it?
It's right there.
186
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:36,995
Down below the shoulder --
there you go.
187
00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:38,997
[ both laugh ]
188
00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:42,667
That's it. That's it.
It's lower. Lower.
189
00:06:42,669 --> 00:06:45,337
Yeah. Get the puerto rican flag
down there. That's it.
190
00:06:45,339 --> 00:06:47,872
You got it. Yes.
191
00:06:47,874 --> 00:06:49,607
You sure you don't
want them?
192
00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:50,942
Ah, well. Thanks.
193
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:52,477
[ laughs ]
194
00:06:52,479 --> 00:06:54,146
Guys, I'm sorry.
195
00:06:54,148 --> 00:06:55,613
My wife just canceled
on me for tonight.
196
00:06:55,615 --> 00:06:57,349
Do you want these tickets?
I can't use them.
197
00:06:57,351 --> 00:06:59,751
The show is, uh...
-Here we go.
198
00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:01,953
..."jersey city..."
[ chuckles ]
199
00:07:01,955 --> 00:07:04,523
[ sal and q laughing ]
200
00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:09,399
Murr: Do you want these tickets?
I can't use them.
201
00:07:09,401 --> 00:07:11,802
The show is, uh...
-Alright. Here we go.
202
00:07:11,804 --> 00:07:14,137
..."jersey city..."
[ chuckles ]
203
00:07:14,139 --> 00:07:15,872
[ q laughing ]
204
00:07:15,874 --> 00:07:18,141
The show is
"jersey city [bleep]-fest."
205
00:07:18,143 --> 00:07:20,543
[ sal and q laughing ]
206
00:07:20,545 --> 00:07:22,279
Why would he say it?
207
00:07:22,281 --> 00:07:23,414
It's a great show.
208
00:07:23,416 --> 00:07:26,216
It's the "jersey city
[bleep]-fest." it's great.
209
00:07:26,218 --> 00:07:28,218
Everybody gets together.
It's a great party.
210
00:07:28,220 --> 00:07:29,219
It's like a rave.
211
00:07:29,221 --> 00:07:31,888
They only do one
[bleep]-fest a year.
212
00:07:31,890 --> 00:07:34,357
They only do one
[bleep]-fest a year.
213
00:07:34,359 --> 00:07:36,226
And it's tonight.
214
00:07:36,228 --> 00:07:37,494
Yes, totally.
215
00:07:37,496 --> 00:07:39,229
You've heard
of oktoberfest, right?
Yes.
216
00:07:39,231 --> 00:07:41,432
This is like the jersey city
version of that.
217
00:07:41,434 --> 00:07:44,167
But it's a...[bleep]-fest.
218
00:07:44,169 --> 00:07:45,769
-Okay.
-Where are they from?
219
00:07:45,771 --> 00:07:47,971
Where are you from?
220
00:07:47,973 --> 00:07:50,641
It's a [bleep]-fest.
A [bleep]-fest.
221
00:07:50,643 --> 00:07:53,310
You guys in Italy
don't have, like [bleep]-fests?
222
00:07:53,312 --> 00:07:55,245
No.
No.
223
00:07:55,247 --> 00:07:57,047
There's no [bleep]-fest?
224
00:07:57,049 --> 00:07:59,850
Well, take them.
Jersey city's a great town.
225
00:07:59,852 --> 00:08:02,185
It's the next town over.
The show's tonight.
226
00:08:02,187 --> 00:08:04,855
If she takes "jersey city
[bleep]-fest" tickets...
227
00:08:04,857 --> 00:08:07,124
Take them. They're free.
Put them to good use.
228
00:08:07,126 --> 00:08:08,792
Give them to somebody.
I don't care.
229
00:08:08,794 --> 00:08:10,460
Yeah, go ahead.
There you go.
230
00:08:10,462 --> 00:08:11,662
Whoa!
231
00:08:11,664 --> 00:08:13,664
Now that I'm married,
I go to less [bleep]-fests.
232
00:08:13,666 --> 00:08:15,732
But the jersey city one
is the best [bleep]-fest
233
00:08:15,734 --> 00:08:18,268
On the east coast.
234
00:08:18,270 --> 00:08:20,671
[ both laugh ]
235
00:08:20,673 --> 00:08:22,005
Ciao.
236
00:08:22,007 --> 00:08:25,408
[ sal and q laughing ]
237
00:08:25,410 --> 00:08:27,277
Narrator: Q took a loss on
his tickets,
238
00:08:27,279 --> 00:08:30,813
Making him first up
on the loser board.
239
00:08:30,815 --> 00:08:32,615
Today, we are
at dominican university,
240
00:08:32,617 --> 00:08:33,884
Sitting in a waiting room
241
00:08:33,886 --> 00:08:36,219
And having an over-the-top
conversation on our cellphones.
242
00:08:36,221 --> 00:08:39,289
After we hang up, we'll be given
the reason why we're so upset.
243
00:08:39,291 --> 00:08:41,424
The goal is to get the other
person in the waiting room
244
00:08:41,426 --> 00:08:43,560
To agree
that you didn't overreact.
245
00:08:43,562 --> 00:08:45,362
If they think you did,
you lose.
246
00:08:45,364 --> 00:08:49,165
I'm so overreacting!
247
00:08:49,167 --> 00:08:50,834
It's actually just
how he acts.
248
00:08:55,040 --> 00:08:57,640
Don't look now,
but it's joffrey.
249
00:08:57,642 --> 00:08:59,042
[ sal and q laugh ]
250
00:08:59,044 --> 00:09:01,578
I'm joffrey!
Hmm?
251
00:09:01,580 --> 00:09:04,181
Cole, today, I think
you're actually chauncey.
252
00:09:04,183 --> 00:09:06,116
Sal:
Ooh, I like chauncey.
253
00:09:06,118 --> 00:09:07,850
Alright,
you can grab a spot.
254
00:09:07,852 --> 00:09:09,520
Here we go, murr.
Incoming.
255
00:09:09,522 --> 00:09:10,521
[ cellphone vibrates ]
256
00:09:10,523 --> 00:09:11,522
Hello?
257
00:09:11,524 --> 00:09:13,323
Okay, murr,
let's see you overreact.
258
00:09:13,325 --> 00:09:17,127
You've got to be kidding me.
This is devastating.
259
00:09:17,129 --> 00:09:19,262
[ sal and q laugh ]
260
00:09:19,264 --> 00:09:20,797
[ voice breaking ]
there's people in here.
261
00:09:20,799 --> 00:09:22,665
I can't talk about this now.
262
00:09:22,667 --> 00:09:24,067
Really? You have to cut
the conversation.
263
00:09:24,069 --> 00:09:25,535
I have to go.
I'm at work right now.
264
00:09:25,537 --> 00:09:28,539
I can't talk --
fine. Fine.
265
00:09:28,541 --> 00:09:29,540
Wrong number.
266
00:09:29,542 --> 00:09:33,944
[ sal and q laugh ]
267
00:09:33,946 --> 00:09:35,612
Wrong number.
268
00:09:35,614 --> 00:09:37,147
[ laughs ]
269
00:09:37,149 --> 00:09:39,149
[ both laugh ]
270
00:09:39,151 --> 00:09:40,817
Why would the wrong
number call me?
271
00:09:40,819 --> 00:09:43,486
I'm at work right now.
It's not right.
272
00:09:43,488 --> 00:09:46,289
Well, listen, if a wrong number
gets you that way,
273
00:09:46,291 --> 00:09:47,758
Imagine if it
was really bad news.
274
00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:50,093
Sal: Oh, I think he's saying
he overreacted.
275
00:09:50,095 --> 00:09:52,362
Why did the person not
double-check the number
276
00:09:52,364 --> 00:09:53,496
Before they called me?
Why don't you just say,
277
00:09:53,498 --> 00:09:55,298
"hey, wrong number.
See you later"?
278
00:09:55,300 --> 00:09:58,168
[ both laugh ]
279
00:09:58,170 --> 00:09:59,903
Any advice
how I can calm down?
280
00:09:59,905 --> 00:10:02,305
Like, it just upsets me so much
that somebody calls --
yeah, smoke weed.
281
00:10:02,307 --> 00:10:03,306
Smoke weed.
282
00:10:03,308 --> 00:10:04,441
Smoke weed?
Yeah.
283
00:10:04,443 --> 00:10:06,777
Oh, come on.
Alright. Hey.
284
00:10:06,779 --> 00:10:08,445
You got
the right guys back here.
285
00:10:08,447 --> 00:10:09,579
Give this guy
my number.
286
00:10:09,581 --> 00:10:11,247
I didn't overreact,
did I?
287
00:10:11,249 --> 00:10:12,915
If a wrong number
upsets you like that,
288
00:10:12,917 --> 00:10:14,050
You have a right
to be upset.
289
00:10:14,052 --> 00:10:16,853
Oh-ho-ho! You got
what you needed, buddy.
290
00:10:16,855 --> 00:10:18,188
He sided with you.
291
00:10:18,190 --> 00:10:21,924
Well, I'm chauncey, and I think
that was an overreaction.
292
00:10:21,926 --> 00:10:24,060
Chauncey,
that's not my opinion, buddy.
293
00:10:24,062 --> 00:10:25,996
[ sal and q laugh ]
294
00:10:25,998 --> 00:10:28,665
Q: Ding, ding, ding.
Here we go.
295
00:10:28,667 --> 00:10:31,334
♪ whose phone is ringing ♪
♪ mine, mine ♪
296
00:10:31,336 --> 00:10:34,737
♪ whose phone is ringing ♪
♪ mine, mine ♪
297
00:10:34,739 --> 00:10:37,007
♪ whose -- ♪
hello?
298
00:10:40,946 --> 00:10:43,480
Murr: Oh, there's the turn.
299
00:10:43,482 --> 00:10:45,081
Q: He's good at this.
300
00:10:45,083 --> 00:10:46,683
He cried on command once.
301
00:10:46,685 --> 00:10:50,120
Well, he's always a step away
from crying, so that's not hard.
302
00:10:52,224 --> 00:10:54,624
Do you think it's okay?
303
00:10:54,626 --> 00:10:56,893
You think that's okay
to do?
304
00:10:56,895 --> 00:10:59,362
Murr: Uh, uh, she just shot
you a look.
305
00:10:59,364 --> 00:11:02,833
This --
this can't be happening again.
306
00:11:02,835 --> 00:11:07,570
Listen to me.
Hear my words.
307
00:11:07,572 --> 00:11:11,241
This is the last time.
It's the last time.
308
00:11:11,243 --> 00:11:13,176
Good-bye.
309
00:11:13,178 --> 00:11:14,845
The mcrib is back.
310
00:11:14,847 --> 00:11:16,513
[ murr and q laugh ]
311
00:11:16,515 --> 00:11:19,249
The mcrib is back.
312
00:11:19,251 --> 00:11:23,053
[ murr and q laughing ]
313
00:11:23,055 --> 00:11:24,987
It keeps coming back.
314
00:11:24,989 --> 00:11:28,191
[ sighs ] I can't take it.
Oh.
315
00:11:28,193 --> 00:11:32,529
It just keeps coming back.
I think it's going to go,
316
00:11:32,531 --> 00:11:34,130
And then it comes back.
317
00:11:34,132 --> 00:11:37,000
It's like it's seasonal, but
they don't say it's seasonal.
318
00:11:37,002 --> 00:11:39,602
[ murr and q laugh ]
319
00:11:39,604 --> 00:11:41,471
That was mcdonald's.
320
00:11:41,473 --> 00:11:42,739
[ both laugh ]
321
00:11:42,741 --> 00:11:43,874
It was a marketing call.
322
00:11:43,876 --> 00:11:46,276
It was a marketing call.
323
00:11:46,278 --> 00:11:48,078
I sell the buns,
you know?
324
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:50,681
Really?
My friends call me
sally buns.
325
00:11:50,683 --> 00:11:51,948
Sally buns.
326
00:11:51,950 --> 00:11:53,884
My name's sal.
Murr: My last name's buns.
327
00:11:53,886 --> 00:11:55,952
My last name is buns.
328
00:11:55,954 --> 00:11:57,487
They just call him
by his name.
329
00:11:57,489 --> 00:11:59,489
It's a good business
to get into, then.
It's a wild coincidence.
Yeah.
330
00:11:59,491 --> 00:12:01,558
[ both laugh ]
331
00:12:01,560 --> 00:12:04,026
The thing is, with the mcrib,
you know the shape of it, right?
Mm-hmm.
332
00:12:04,028 --> 00:12:06,496
So the buns
need to be oblong.
Mm-hmm.
333
00:12:06,498 --> 00:12:08,231
They're hard to make.
334
00:12:08,233 --> 00:12:10,500
Why are they
hard to make?
335
00:12:10,502 --> 00:12:12,703
Because you need
a special machinery for it.
336
00:12:12,705 --> 00:12:16,172
And every time
they tell me the mcrib's gone,
337
00:12:16,174 --> 00:12:17,640
I throw the machine out.
338
00:12:17,642 --> 00:12:18,975
It's a $120,000 machine.
339
00:12:18,977 --> 00:12:21,444
Just to make
slightly different bread.
340
00:12:21,446 --> 00:12:25,181
I have spent over
half a million dollars
341
00:12:25,183 --> 00:12:27,050
On mcrib bun machines.
342
00:12:29,588 --> 00:12:31,254
[ q and murr laugh ]
343
00:12:31,256 --> 00:12:33,790
Sal --
"I am so mcpissed."
344
00:12:33,792 --> 00:12:35,926
I am mc-[bleep]ing-mad.
345
00:12:35,928 --> 00:12:37,193
[ q and murr laugh ]
346
00:12:37,195 --> 00:12:41,932
-The mcballs on them.
-The mcballs on them.
347
00:12:41,934 --> 00:12:43,800
Murr: Did I
mcoverreact?
348
00:12:43,802 --> 00:12:47,270
[ q and murr laughing ]
349
00:12:47,272 --> 00:12:49,672
Do you think I overreacted?
No.
350
00:12:49,674 --> 00:12:50,873
Whoa!
Oh!
351
00:12:50,875 --> 00:12:52,609
I've never tried a mcrib.
Never will.
352
00:12:52,611 --> 00:12:54,411
No?
Not after today.
353
00:12:54,413 --> 00:12:56,679
Not after today? Well, thank you
so, so goddamn much.
354
00:12:56,681 --> 00:12:59,415
I like the mcrib.
I'm glad it's back out.
355
00:12:59,417 --> 00:13:01,284
Do you know how much longer
I have to mc-[bleep]ing-wait?
356
00:13:01,286 --> 00:13:03,085
You could probably
just go home.
357
00:13:03,087 --> 00:13:04,821
It's a mcrib focus group.
358
00:13:04,823 --> 00:13:05,888
Okay.
359
00:13:05,890 --> 00:13:07,557
[ q and murr laughing ]
360
00:13:07,559 --> 00:13:10,627
Hi.
Hi.
361
00:13:10,629 --> 00:13:13,896
Alright.
You know this old chestnut.
362
00:13:13,898 --> 00:13:15,031
[ cellphone playing
"ode to joy" ]
oh.
363
00:13:15,033 --> 00:13:16,499
Uh-oh. Oh, wow.
364
00:13:16,501 --> 00:13:18,701
How rude.
[ chuckles ]
365
00:13:18,703 --> 00:13:20,903
Hey. Yell-o.
366
00:13:20,905 --> 00:13:22,305
Hey, bud.
367
00:13:23,908 --> 00:13:25,375
Murr: Uh-oh.
Sal: Oh, no.
368
00:13:25,377 --> 00:13:27,377
Uh-oh, q.
No, no.
369
00:13:27,379 --> 00:13:31,782
Just say that one more time.
Make sure I have it right.
370
00:13:31,784 --> 00:13:33,516
[ murr and sal laugh ]
371
00:13:33,518 --> 00:13:34,985
Listen to me.
372
00:13:34,987 --> 00:13:37,787
You don't want to make an enemy
out of me, okay?
373
00:13:37,789 --> 00:13:39,722
You already did it?
374
00:13:39,724 --> 00:13:42,925
No, I'm not living with that.
I got news for you, friend.
375
00:13:42,927 --> 00:13:44,460
You're not going to be living
with that much longer
376
00:13:44,462 --> 00:13:45,462
If you keep this up.
377
00:13:45,464 --> 00:13:47,330
-Hang up. Hang up.
-No, no, no, no, no.
378
00:13:47,332 --> 00:13:51,734
You'll be seeing me
real soon.
379
00:13:51,736 --> 00:13:52,969
My wife got bangs.
380
00:13:55,207 --> 00:13:56,806
Murr: She's got bangs.
381
00:13:56,808 --> 00:13:59,009
[ murr and sal laugh ]
382
00:14:01,914 --> 00:14:04,781
No, no, no, no, no.
You'll be seeing me real soon.
383
00:14:04,783 --> 00:14:06,583
My wife got bangs.
384
00:14:06,585 --> 00:14:07,984
[ murr and sal laugh ]
385
00:14:07,986 --> 00:14:09,619
Murr: She's got bangs.
386
00:14:14,126 --> 00:14:16,526
My wife got bangs.
387
00:14:16,528 --> 00:14:18,861
[ murr and sal laugh ]
388
00:14:18,863 --> 00:14:20,396
She cut her hair
into bangs, you mean?
389
00:14:20,398 --> 00:14:22,799
She got bangs.
390
00:14:22,801 --> 00:14:23,934
And here's the thing.
391
00:14:23,936 --> 00:14:26,068
I go through the cycle
with her every five years.
392
00:14:26,070 --> 00:14:27,470
She wants bangs,
she gets bangs,
393
00:14:27,472 --> 00:14:29,339
Then she cries
'cause nobody
394
00:14:29,341 --> 00:14:31,942
Looks good with bangs.
395
00:14:31,944 --> 00:14:34,210
[ murr and sal laugh ]
396
00:14:34,212 --> 00:14:35,478
Sal: Look at
chauncey's face.
397
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:38,548
Every woman I know
that gets bangs regrets bangs.
398
00:14:38,550 --> 00:14:41,083
Do you remember
that she has bangs?
399
00:14:41,085 --> 00:14:43,820
[ sobs ]
400
00:14:43,822 --> 00:14:45,155
Those aren't bangs, right?
401
00:14:45,157 --> 00:14:47,157
Yeah. These are bangs.
Oh, okay. Sorry.
402
00:14:47,159 --> 00:14:49,492
And I don't care
what you think of them, but --
403
00:14:49,494 --> 00:14:51,294
No, see, I don't look at those
as bangs.
404
00:14:51,296 --> 00:14:54,164
She gets those short ones that
look like an anime creature.
405
00:14:54,166 --> 00:14:56,566
Yeah, but don't you love her
regardless of, like, bangs?
406
00:14:56,568 --> 00:14:59,435
It's not like she, like,
got a facelift or something.
407
00:14:59,437 --> 00:15:01,904
[ murr and sal laugh ]
408
00:15:01,906 --> 00:15:03,906
You don't think I overreacted
to that, do you?
409
00:15:03,908 --> 00:15:06,042
Uh...
[ chuckles ]
410
00:15:06,044 --> 00:15:08,711
I wouldn't act that way.
Let's just put it that way.
411
00:15:08,713 --> 00:15:09,779
Murr: Wow.
412
00:15:09,781 --> 00:15:11,648
Yes. Overreacting.
413
00:15:11,650 --> 00:15:12,849
My girlfriend has bangs.
414
00:15:12,851 --> 00:15:14,184
How does she look?
Terrible.
415
00:15:14,186 --> 00:15:15,185
Yeah.
416
00:15:15,187 --> 00:15:16,919
[ murr and sal laugh ]
417
00:15:16,921 --> 00:15:18,655
I'm going to go outside
and smoke this plant.
418
00:15:18,657 --> 00:15:20,590
[ murr and sal laugh ]
419
00:15:20,592 --> 00:15:22,192
[bleep] you, joffrey.
420
00:15:22,194 --> 00:15:24,927
[ murr and sal laugh ]
421
00:15:24,929 --> 00:15:27,397
Narrator: Q blew things
out of proportion,
422
00:15:27,399 --> 00:15:30,000
So he's tonight's big loser.
423
00:15:30,002 --> 00:15:33,203
Oh, my god.
Today is a special day.
424
00:15:33,205 --> 00:15:35,071
I cannot believe
I'm saying this.
425
00:15:35,073 --> 00:15:37,740
This is ridiculous.
But we have, as a guest,
426
00:15:37,742 --> 00:15:41,077
Television legend
and celebrity chef, alf.
427
00:15:41,079 --> 00:15:43,880
Hi, alf.
Hi. Listen, I heard you lost,
428
00:15:43,882 --> 00:15:47,350
And these guys want
to punish you, and I said no.
429
00:15:47,352 --> 00:15:49,752
No one's going to punish
my biggest fan.
430
00:15:49,754 --> 00:15:52,555
So instead, alf decided
to give you a reward.
431
00:15:52,557 --> 00:15:55,158
That's right. I got this new
cookbook out,
432
00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:59,429
And we are going to cook you
a melmacian feast.
433
00:15:59,431 --> 00:16:00,897
You lost.
This is your reward.
434
00:16:00,899 --> 00:16:02,765
You're welcome, buddy.
But here's the deal.
435
00:16:02,767 --> 00:16:04,701
We're not going to tell you
what's in each dish.
436
00:16:04,703 --> 00:16:07,303
We think it'd be more fun
if you try to figure it out.
437
00:16:07,305 --> 00:16:09,839
And I hope
you have a refined palate.
438
00:16:09,841 --> 00:16:12,108
There's going to be a lot of
different flavors happening
439
00:16:12,110 --> 00:16:15,178
In my mother's famous
slimeballs parmesan.
440
00:16:15,180 --> 00:16:16,779
[ laughter ]
441
00:16:16,781 --> 00:16:19,049
Can we bring out the dish?
Q: Alright.
442
00:16:19,051 --> 00:16:20,316
Sal: Let's bring out
the slimeballs.
443
00:16:20,318 --> 00:16:21,918
One of my favorites.
444
00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:26,723
Murr: Q, it's a spaghetti
and slimeball.
445
00:16:26,725 --> 00:16:28,991
That looks pretty good.
Sal: Yeah.
446
00:16:28,993 --> 00:16:31,127
You've got to eat this one
before it clots.
447
00:16:31,129 --> 00:16:32,795
Oh, god.
[ laughter ]
448
00:16:32,797 --> 00:16:35,866
Oh, man. I can't.
Yeah, you can, and you will.
449
00:16:35,868 --> 00:16:38,068
Now, here's the deal. You're
going to take a bite of that
450
00:16:38,070 --> 00:16:39,469
And you're going to
try to tell us what's in it.
451
00:16:39,471 --> 00:16:40,470
And if you don't get it right,
452
00:16:40,472 --> 00:16:41,738
You're going
to take another bite.
453
00:16:41,740 --> 00:16:44,274
Alright.
[ clears throat ]
454
00:16:44,276 --> 00:16:45,541
[ whining ]
455
00:16:45,543 --> 00:16:47,143
Yeah, get the accouterment,
too. Not just the --
456
00:16:47,145 --> 00:16:48,278
Yeah, get the
whole thing.
457
00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:49,746
This is the part --
that's the
slimeball.
458
00:16:49,748 --> 00:16:50,747
Get a slimeball.
459
00:16:50,749 --> 00:16:52,549
You know,
these were all tested
460
00:16:52,551 --> 00:16:54,417
In a test kitchen.
461
00:16:54,419 --> 00:16:55,552
Here, though,
on this planet,
462
00:16:55,554 --> 00:16:57,687
I think you call it
a poison control center.
463
00:16:57,689 --> 00:16:59,756
[ laughter ]
464
00:16:59,758 --> 00:17:01,291
Oh, alf.
465
00:17:01,293 --> 00:17:03,360
Chomp, chomp.
Chomp, chomp.
466
00:17:05,563 --> 00:17:07,297
Ugh.
467
00:17:07,299 --> 00:17:08,465
What do you think?
468
00:17:13,171 --> 00:17:16,172
Obviously, spaghetti,
we got.
469
00:17:16,174 --> 00:17:17,307
The cherries, I got.
470
00:17:17,309 --> 00:17:18,908
It's the slimeball
that's a mystery.
471
00:17:18,910 --> 00:17:22,913
First guess is, like,
a chicken liver?
472
00:17:22,915 --> 00:17:24,781
-That's disgusting.
-Yeah.
473
00:17:24,783 --> 00:17:27,383
[ laughter ]
474
00:17:27,385 --> 00:17:29,319
Is it a mollusk of some sort?
475
00:17:29,321 --> 00:17:31,922
Ah!
Ah!
476
00:17:31,924 --> 00:17:34,056
They have mollusks
on melmac.
477
00:17:34,058 --> 00:17:35,591
It crawls.
478
00:17:35,593 --> 00:17:38,260
This is escargot?
This is a slug?
479
00:17:38,262 --> 00:17:39,261
Oh.
480
00:17:39,263 --> 00:17:40,997
Yes, q,
the spaghetti and slimeball
481
00:17:40,999 --> 00:17:44,267
Is cherry pie filling, spaghetti
with red pepper flakes,
482
00:17:44,269 --> 00:17:46,669
And escargot.
Delicious.
483
00:17:46,671 --> 00:17:49,005
Well, can we escar-go
to the next plate?
Yes.
484
00:17:49,007 --> 00:17:50,006
Nice segue.
485
00:17:50,008 --> 00:17:52,274
Yeah. Not bad, right?
Yeah.
486
00:17:52,276 --> 00:17:55,278
Oh, my gosh.
This looks great, q.
487
00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:56,613
This is one of alf's
specialties.
488
00:17:56,615 --> 00:17:59,349
It's disheveled
eggs.
Disheveled eggs.
489
00:17:59,351 --> 00:18:02,018
This is a reward.
Yeah.
490
00:18:02,020 --> 00:18:03,953
This is not a reward.
491
00:18:03,955 --> 00:18:05,355
Alf made these dishes.
Are you kidding me?
492
00:18:05,357 --> 00:18:06,823
This is a reward,
my friend.
493
00:18:06,825 --> 00:18:08,424
Well, I didn't
make them personally.
494
00:18:08,426 --> 00:18:10,560
We have a chef in the back.
He's an italian guy.
495
00:18:10,562 --> 00:18:12,428
Sal monella.
496
00:18:12,430 --> 00:18:15,832
[ laughter ]
497
00:18:15,834 --> 00:18:17,367
So eat that.
Come on, hurry up.
498
00:18:17,369 --> 00:18:19,169
Alright. Okay.
499
00:18:19,171 --> 00:18:21,437
Hoo.
It's stinks.
500
00:18:21,439 --> 00:18:23,640
-Oh. Oh.
-Q.
501
00:18:23,642 --> 00:18:25,175
Q: I'm gonna throw up
already.
502
00:18:25,177 --> 00:18:26,442
Check, please.
503
00:18:26,444 --> 00:18:28,178
[ sal laughs ]
504
00:18:30,381 --> 00:18:33,115
Hoo! It stinks.
Alright. Okay.
505
00:18:35,586 --> 00:18:36,986
Murr: Q.
I'm gonna throw up already.
506
00:18:36,988 --> 00:18:38,320
[ gags ]
507
00:18:38,322 --> 00:18:40,389
Check, please.
[ laughs ]
508
00:18:40,391 --> 00:18:42,124
Just tell us
the ingredients, babe.
509
00:18:42,126 --> 00:18:43,259
That's all you got to do.
510
00:18:43,261 --> 00:18:45,927
Obviously, we got
anchovy of some sort
511
00:18:45,929 --> 00:18:47,262
On top of an egg.
512
00:18:47,264 --> 00:18:48,730
Yeah.
513
00:18:48,732 --> 00:18:49,799
Is this fish food?
514
00:18:49,801 --> 00:18:52,868
It's got
some fish food.
515
00:18:52,870 --> 00:18:55,004
What do you taste in there
for the yolk?
516
00:18:55,006 --> 00:18:56,738
It just tastes like fish.
517
00:18:56,740 --> 00:18:59,274
What you have here
is an egg yolk
518
00:18:59,276 --> 00:19:01,076
Made of toothpaste,
my friend.
519
00:19:01,078 --> 00:19:03,946
Toothpaste?
Yeah. Yellowed toothpaste.
520
00:19:03,948 --> 00:19:05,281
[ laughter ]
521
00:19:05,283 --> 00:19:06,949
I'm hoping
you're enjoying it.
522
00:19:06,951 --> 00:19:09,485
I'm loving it.
Yeah. Then we have more.
523
00:19:09,487 --> 00:19:11,553
Oh, thank you.
524
00:19:11,555 --> 00:19:12,688
Maybe we could start, like,
525
00:19:12,690 --> 00:19:15,090
A line of frozen,
like, at-home dinners?
526
00:19:15,092 --> 00:19:16,558
Absolutely.
Yeah?
527
00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:19,895
I'm not the only chef
named gordon that sold out.
528
00:19:19,897 --> 00:19:21,697
[ laughter ]
529
00:19:21,699 --> 00:19:22,764
Shots fired.
530
00:19:22,766 --> 00:19:24,166
Oh.
Alright, let's see
531
00:19:24,168 --> 00:19:25,901
What you do
with the next thing.
532
00:19:25,903 --> 00:19:28,170
What?
What the [bleep] is this?
533
00:19:28,172 --> 00:19:30,572
This is a melmacian
classic.
534
00:19:30,574 --> 00:19:32,574
Murr: It's what
alf calls tongues casino.
535
00:19:32,576 --> 00:19:34,576
Right.
As they say on your planet,
536
00:19:34,578 --> 00:19:35,845
"mangia."
537
00:19:35,847 --> 00:19:38,647
Oh, no.
538
00:19:38,649 --> 00:19:40,182
Oh. Q.
539
00:19:40,184 --> 00:19:42,117
Oh.
540
00:19:42,119 --> 00:19:44,253
Oh, god.
541
00:19:48,125 --> 00:19:50,326
Alf, I've never tried
this delicacy.
542
00:19:50,328 --> 00:19:53,462
I have heard, though,
it tastes pretty good.
543
00:19:53,464 --> 00:19:55,464
The first person I dated
in my life
544
00:19:55,466 --> 00:19:58,133
Used to eat it all the time,
and then we'd make out afterward
545
00:19:58,135 --> 00:20:00,469
And I would be
grossed out.
546
00:20:00,471 --> 00:20:02,672
That's...
547
00:20:02,674 --> 00:20:05,407
Just carry on.
Carry on.
548
00:20:05,409 --> 00:20:09,611
Carry on.
I shouldn't have told the tale.
549
00:20:09,613 --> 00:20:12,147
I can't swallow.
550
00:20:12,149 --> 00:20:13,683
Want something to wash
it down?
551
00:20:13,685 --> 00:20:16,151
Yes.
Saliva.
552
00:20:16,153 --> 00:20:17,953
Alright. What is this?
Cow tongue?
553
00:20:17,955 --> 00:20:20,489
Yes!
Very good, q!
554
00:20:20,491 --> 00:20:21,891
It's cow tongue.
555
00:20:21,893 --> 00:20:24,960
The best is
yet to come.
556
00:20:24,962 --> 00:20:27,096
Q, what we have
here for you
557
00:20:27,098 --> 00:20:29,465
Is alf's garden pizza.
558
00:20:31,903 --> 00:20:35,571
Garden of melmac.
Garden of melmac
pizza?
559
00:20:35,573 --> 00:20:36,838
Oh, lord.
560
00:20:36,840 --> 00:20:38,040
Dig right in there.
Dig right in there.
561
00:20:38,042 --> 00:20:40,743
Yeah.
Come on. Don't be shy.
562
00:20:42,513 --> 00:20:43,645
[ laughs ]
563
00:20:43,647 --> 00:20:45,847
You know he's enjoying this.
Yes.
564
00:20:45,849 --> 00:20:48,984
Yeah.
That is very attractive.
565
00:20:48,986 --> 00:20:51,320
[ gags ]
566
00:20:52,924 --> 00:20:54,856
Mm.
567
00:20:54,858 --> 00:20:57,793
Are you going to
play a tune?
568
00:20:57,795 --> 00:21:00,730
[ gags ]
uh-oh.
I take it he likes it?
569
00:21:00,732 --> 00:21:03,132
That's right.
He loves it.
570
00:21:03,134 --> 00:21:04,666
Ugh.
571
00:21:04,668 --> 00:21:06,468
So what are you thinking?
Alright.
572
00:21:06,470 --> 00:21:09,471
First of all,
it's delicious.
573
00:21:09,473 --> 00:21:11,741
[ laughter ]
574
00:21:11,743 --> 00:21:13,275
Another winner.
575
00:21:13,277 --> 00:21:16,411
Alright, obviously,
we have some grass.
576
00:21:16,413 --> 00:21:17,613
That's right.
577
00:21:17,615 --> 00:21:18,814
We do have grass
in the garden.
Okay.
578
00:21:18,816 --> 00:21:20,416
And then this
is what was getting me.
579
00:21:20,418 --> 00:21:23,085
The shell
of whatever this bug is.
580
00:21:23,087 --> 00:21:26,488
I don't know.
Is this crickets?
Yes, it is.
581
00:21:26,490 --> 00:21:28,890
You have pizza sauce,
grass,
582
00:21:28,892 --> 00:21:30,425
And grasshoppers.
583
00:21:30,427 --> 00:21:32,161
Alright, q,
one final dish, bud.
584
00:21:32,163 --> 00:21:33,495
You're doing great.
585
00:21:33,497 --> 00:21:35,230
I just want to give you
a warning.
Okay.
586
00:21:35,232 --> 00:21:37,699
This is going to change
your whole perspective.
587
00:21:37,701 --> 00:21:38,900
Is it really?
Yeah.
588
00:21:38,902 --> 00:21:42,437
You're not going to want
to do this show anymore.
589
00:21:42,439 --> 00:21:44,239
I hear the fire
department's hiring.
590
00:21:44,241 --> 00:21:46,342
[ laughter ]
591
00:21:51,248 --> 00:21:52,914
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
592
00:21:52,916 --> 00:21:54,783
And where does this recipe
come from?
593
00:21:54,785 --> 00:21:55,785
Again, melmac.
594
00:21:55,787 --> 00:21:57,953
[ laughter ]
595
00:21:59,991 --> 00:22:01,456
Get that in there.
596
00:22:01,458 --> 00:22:02,591
Uh-oh.
597
00:22:02,593 --> 00:22:04,860
One final dish.
Everything with everything.
598
00:22:04,862 --> 00:22:06,395
How many ingredients
are in this?
599
00:22:06,397 --> 00:22:08,463
It doesn't really
matter.
600
00:22:08,465 --> 00:22:10,399
[ sal laughs ]
601
00:22:10,401 --> 00:22:13,369
Oh, my. Yeah.
602
00:22:15,807 --> 00:22:18,808
Don't overblend it.
603
00:22:18,810 --> 00:22:23,412
There still needs to be
little lumps in it.
604
00:22:23,414 --> 00:22:24,613
Sal: Alright.
605
00:22:24,615 --> 00:22:25,747
What am I supposed
to do with this?
606
00:22:25,749 --> 00:22:26,948
You're supposed
to drink that,
607
00:22:26,950 --> 00:22:28,417
And when you finish drinking it,
we're done.
608
00:22:28,419 --> 00:22:31,086
Murr: That's it, buddy.
Simple punishment.
609
00:22:31,088 --> 00:22:32,487
Sal: So, q,
610
00:22:32,489 --> 00:22:33,955
You know that this is everything
with everything.
611
00:22:33,957 --> 00:22:36,825
So in this concoction right now,
we have toothpaste,
612
00:22:36,827 --> 00:22:39,428
Sardine,
dried fish flakes,
613
00:22:39,430 --> 00:22:44,233
Escargot, grasshoppers,
grass, and cow tongue.
614
00:22:44,235 --> 00:22:47,236
The best. This is
the culmination of everything.
615
00:22:47,238 --> 00:22:49,505
Yeah.
It could be
the culmination of your career.
616
00:22:49,507 --> 00:22:52,441
[ laughter ]
617
00:22:52,443 --> 00:22:53,742
Try it. You'll like it.
618
00:22:55,646 --> 00:22:56,912
Drum roll, please.
619
00:22:56,914 --> 00:22:58,147
[ drum roll ]
620
00:23:00,651 --> 00:23:01,983
[ laughs ]
621
00:23:01,985 --> 00:23:03,719
Down the hatch,
as they say.
622
00:23:03,721 --> 00:23:05,987
Up the lid.
623
00:23:05,989 --> 00:23:08,190
[ gags ]
624
00:23:08,192 --> 00:23:10,192
It's a success.
625
00:23:10,194 --> 00:23:12,461
[ laughter ]
626
00:23:12,463 --> 00:23:14,263
He didn't even
drink it yet.
627
00:23:14,265 --> 00:23:16,665
The smell is outrageous.
You threw up? Legit?
628
00:23:16,667 --> 00:23:18,868
The smell is out--
[ gags ]
629
00:23:18,870 --> 00:23:20,202
Eww!
630
00:23:20,204 --> 00:23:23,672
No, thanks.
I just brushed my teeth.
631
00:23:23,674 --> 00:23:26,542
Murr: Alright, q.
Here we go, buddy.
632
00:23:26,544 --> 00:23:27,943
Sal: Here we go.
633
00:23:27,945 --> 00:23:31,747
Alright, buddy.
Alright, alright.
634
00:23:31,749 --> 00:23:32,882
Watch out.
Get out of --
635
00:23:32,884 --> 00:23:35,016
Oh!
[ laughs ]
636
00:23:35,018 --> 00:23:37,486
[ vomits ]
637
00:23:40,291 --> 00:23:42,357
It was in my mouth.
It was in my mouth.
638
00:23:42,359 --> 00:23:43,825
[ gags ]
q: What do I
got to do here?
639
00:23:43,827 --> 00:23:45,694
Don't stand near me
and dry heave.
640
00:23:45,696 --> 00:23:47,362
I didn't know
I was going to do it.
641
00:23:47,364 --> 00:23:48,497
It comes out
involuntarily.
642
00:23:48,499 --> 00:23:50,231
You're dry heaving
over my right shoulder.
643
00:23:50,233 --> 00:23:53,102
[ gags ]
oh.
644
00:23:53,104 --> 00:23:55,570
I would get out
of spraying distance.
645
00:23:55,572 --> 00:23:57,306
[ vomits ]
646
00:23:57,308 --> 00:24:01,176
You know, it's great to be
doing highbrow comedy again.
647
00:24:01,178 --> 00:24:02,344
[ laughter ]